TigerBelly - Episode 7: The Menstrual Monster
Episode Date: October 14, 2015Khalyla unleashes a fury. She blames her endometrial lining. Bobby might be sucking the D in his sleep. We talk DP, Drizzy, and delusion. We say this, we retract that, but Caitlyn Jenner is s...till the dickhead of the week.  Recorded October 13, 2015 Music by Bobby Lee Quincy needs our love. https://www.gofundme.com/Quamidontplaythat  Instagram: @tigerbelly Twitter: @thetigerbellySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Welcome to Tiger Belly. My name is Bo Boily and I have Kalyla and Gilbert and welcome to another episode of
Tiger Belly. Um, it's really good to be here guys with you too.
What? It's really good guys. It's good to be here with you guys.
Um, what a day. What a week. What a life. What a life. I have a question for you. Yeah, go ahead.
Um, so I think actually it's not a question. It's more like a, uh, an assessment. I think that you've
taken this whole, um, sexual fluidity, um, to a whole new level. What is sexual fluidity? Remember
when I said last episode that, Hey, you know, I wouldn't be turned off if you were bisexual or if
you were like attracted to men or whatever. Why do you start a podcast like this? The reason I start
a podcast is because all day you've been wearing that hat. It just, okay, I bought a hat. Um,
at what's that place called on Larchmont? I bought a hat. I wasn't with you when you bought it because
I would have vetoed the decision. What is it? What animal is that? It's a rooster. So he comes over
to me. I was in another store and he goes, look, sweetie, I bought a hat. I really like it because
it has a rooster on it. I'm like, also in full caps, it says the word cock. It doesn't matter.
That's what they're called. Yeah. You see that? It's comedy though, right? It's not for comedy.
No, it's, I like roosters. He likes the word too. Yeah. Wait, cock or rooster? I like roosters.
Well, Gilbert, what the fuck does the hat say? It says cock. Then it's a fucking cock. All right.
I don't know. I mean, this is a really aggressive beginning. Really, really aggressive. I mean,
I just said let's make it a good week. It's exciting. I'm sorry guys. And then now you're
like attacking me. That's okay. Let's be friendly. Let's be friendly. Well, what about this then? I
wasn't going to mention this, but since you attack me, I'm going to attack you today. We were at
Chipotle and there's a valet and Kalaila walked into the wrong Prius and that was fucking embarrassing.
Wait, what? You tried to open it? So she walked in. There was a guy driving, right? A car that looks
like mine. He just parked and Kalaila just decides to go in there. Is it the same color?
You know what he said? You know what he said? What? Okay, first of all, if I would have done
that, I would have got shot. Yeah. You know what she said? He says to her, well, hello there.
That's what he says. Some white dude. Well, hello there. Because there's valet right outside of
the Chipotle on Vine, right? So I thought that it was just a valet guy pulling out our car and
parking on the spot. And as it turns out, it was just some dude parking. So I literally without
it, because I was on my phone, Gilbert, I go inside his car without even looking to see
if that was our car at all. And he just looked at me like, well, hi there. And then you responded.
And then I was like, oh, my God, you're not Bobby. And what was I doing at that time?
What was I doing at that time? I'll take a photo with a fan.
You find that gross that he does that? Yes, I do. I don't like it.
Because every time I get recognized, I wink at her and it drives her fucking crazy.
I don't mind that he takes pictures with people. It's just he holds it over my head.
Like he always tells me he's like, how does it feel to be dating a Korean Elvis, huh, babe?
I didn't say that. That's cocky. I would never say I'm the Korean Elvis.
You say it every day. What would you say you are? The Korean one.
And that's what that's what I want to be the Korean Pablo Escobar.
I started him on the show Narcos. Good show.
And he officially wants to dress and look and act like Escobar.
I do. Except without like the killing of people, but generally like the whole.
I just like the way his body is shaped because he's kind of his shape kind of like me, you know.
And so I just like that whole vibe. I'm a huge fan of Mexican Choi, too. You know who that is?
You ever see the Korean movie Old Boy? Oh, yeah.
There was an American version that Josh Brolin was in, but there's the original.
Yeah. You ever see the movie? No. What? You're not a real Asian.
You're not a real Asian if you don't watch that movie. Basically, you're not an Asian at all.
Yeah. Wow. It was really aggressive. What? I'm Asian. I don't know. How much? How much Asian are
you? Let me ask you some questions. What Korean movies have seen? What Korean movies? What does
Asian moves in general? Like all the, you know, is like a Jackie Chan movie? No, no, no, no.
In the last five years, maybe in the last five years. Did you see I'm going to ask you a question.
Go ahead. The last 10 years. Let's let's do. Do you ever see the host?
Yes. Scary film. Horror film. Yeah. What kind of horror film is it?
It's like a sci-fi-ish, like it's like a body outer experience type of thing. No, you can't.
It's with that big, giant fucking Godzilla type reptile. No, you didn't. That's not what you said.
You just said like an invasion of the body snatchers kind of a movie.
And it has nothing to do with that. So you're a fucking liar. All right. All right.
I lied. Yeah. Do you ever see The Raid? Yes. What's it about? It's Indonesian superstar.
Yeah. Yeah. So I've seen The Raid. I watch all martial arts films. Oh, you do? Yes.
Okay. You have to see Old Boy though. I will. And you also have to see the movie I Saw the Devil,
which is another Korean movie. I don't know that one. With Mixed Choice. You don't. Yeah,
it's fine. I'm telling you to watch it. Okay, we'll watch it. And then that girl from last time,
that girl called you because remember we texted her, we texted her, I want to eat your pussy
through your phone. Yep. And then she gave you a week of no calling. No calling. I actually
tried to contact her next day to apologize. And she never, she never picked up. Nope.
And then why did she call you? I think I was in Chicago. And she just decided to call him.
I think she might have listened to the podcast. She listened to the podcast. That's what you said.
Yeah. Yeah. Pretty sure. Yeah. She listened to the podcast. She called me. Yeah. I was like,
what's up? And I just apologize for that. What did she say? She's like, okay. Well, she hates us.
No. She has to hate me. Do we have to have her on the show? No. It's not one of those things.
But she kept, she did say, you know what? Bobby Lee isn't the end all for Raiding Girls
and Prettiness. He doesn't know about pretty girls. Well, then I showed her.
Bitch, what the fuck you talking about?
Seven is a great fucking rating. And honestly, let me tell you a little thing, Sarah.
Because you know what? It's a fucking little blonde girl talking shit about my man.
I don't give a fuck. She has no Korean if she fucking says that about you. Her middle name is Coon.
Yeah. That's neither Korean or white. Coon is a racial slur. Is it really? Oh, yeah,
for black people. Yeah. Oh, God. That's, baby, you're so aggressive. She defends you right now.
I mean, thank you so much for that. Like a mama bear. I know I can defend myself, though. Okay,
go ahead. I think it's fine. What'd you say about me? This fucking girl? What'd you say? Nothing.
She's like, you weren't the end all be all. I am the end and end all be all. Oh, you are? Yeah.
Yeah. Who is then in terms of Korean dudes? Yeah. Is that what she's saying? No, she's
because you called her a seven. I was like, let me say something. I'm a fucking strong four.
That's why I'll admit that low on purpose. That's fine. All right. But I'll say I'm a four,
a strong four. Okay. And I'll accept what I am. Okay. She must accept that she's a seven.
She has to. She has to accept and also I'm sorry if any girl says that she's over a seven out loud.
Yeah. She didn't say she was over. Yeah. But the fact that she would even be so much as offended
by that number because guess what? I've been called lower than that and I say I will take that
because it's like it's fucking perception, right? No one's trying to say anything other than
what they prove. It's just their opinion of it. No, you're not going to be everybody's type.
So I'm a cry about it. That's why I don't. Sarah, you became a 4.5 in my book. Damn. I don't want
to know my number there. Well, your number. Oh, fuck. No, let's move the fuck on guys. After you lost
away, you're a six man. That's a good thing. I don't know. Fuck. I saw that photo. It was like a
big brown piece of poop. Good. Anyway, all right. So everyone's at fine. Okay. We're all good. It's
a great week. We're all good. It's a wonderful week. Okay. It's going to be a good week to coming up.
I have to go to San Francisco. I'm going to be at the punch line this week at the punch line in
San Francisco. Colila will be there. So come check us out. She's not going to perform, but she'll be
backstage and she'll be wandering around and that's going to be a fun show. We've seen a lot of good
things and a lot of things have happened this week to us. Correct, baby? Number one, I want to say
that she gave me shit about joining a porn site. What was the call babe? Well, no, I just saw
an online receipt for a site called Older's for Youngers. Oh, that was me. No, I saw it from,
it was definitely his. What is Older's for Youngers? I don't know, but anyway. I mean,
you can sort of deduce Gilbert what it means. If it's a porn site that says Older's for Youngers,
it's literally old guys who like super young girls, which is fine, whatever. Like my mom and
dad were into that. They had a 36 year age gap. But what I find it creepy about my own boyfriend,
it's like, you know, honestly, though, here's the thing, you cannot judge a man by his preferences
in porn. Like you just, that doesn't, that doesn't say anything about who he is as a person. It just,
the nicest guy, like even if Jesus himself came down and said, Hey, you know what? This is my
porn preference. It would be really strange. So you just can't say anything. That's blasphemy.
Jesus doesn't watch porn. We're a Christian podcast. Okay. Oh, you're right. We are. So don't
say that again. Jesus is my lord. Explain Older's for Youngers to me. Well, it's basically, I was
wandering around, okay, in porn have porn on the internet. Yeah. Do you understand? Do you
understand? Like I went to one of those like free porn hub kind of sites just to fuck around, you
know what I mean? And I saw this porn where it was like a 65 year old man with with just a younger
girl and I and I go out. So I went to the website and I joined it thinking that she's not going to
look through my fucking receipts. I didn't look through your receipts. She looked through my
emails. No, it's not because we were going to set up a PayPal account collectively as a group and
you gave me your email and it was literally, I didn't even click on the email. It says Older's
for Youngers. All right. It says PayPal account. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. You admit it. You were
on Older's. I bought it. But you gave me a one month subscription to it. How much was that?
$20. So I just did it. $20 is expensive. It's very expensive. Anyway. Oh, wow. It was a trial
$20. I was checking it out. Trial. You know what I mean? So that's that. I don't want to talk about
it. I apologize. All right. It's not like I'm into that. I just wanted to just see what you know
how like you can't see any of the photos unless you join. So I go, you know, I'll spend the 20
bucks and I joined it. And then I regretted it and let's move on. You know, what kind of porn do
you watch? Taxi porn. We already went through those. It's check tax and also amateur cream pies
dot com when it's the low quality stuff. So it's a little bit fuzzy and also why do you like cream
pie or just anything amateur? But why do you like cream pie? Because I'm not allowed to do it. Yeah.
You know what I do? You know what's bullshit is surprise cream pie. You know what that is?
Whether it's great. No, it's called cream pie. I can't even speak Korean. Korean. Korean pie.
Cream pie surprise. Is that what they call? And it's basically videos where we're like a porn actor
will, you know, go inside another woman by like, but not tell them. And then they go, why did you do
that? Is this actual amateur? Yeah, it's an actual kind of, you know, a video. But if you watch them,
they're all they're all fake. Yeah, because the acting is so poor on it. Because the girls aren't
really that mad. You know what I mean? They're like, why did you do that? Because she's told to
say that because they want to make a cream pie surprise video, right? And they're telling them
beforehand. So it's like the acting is not good. That's why I wish Kate Blanchett would do porn.
Because that when she does cream by surprise, I'll go, I believe that. How about that? That's
great acting. Wait, what's the matter? Nothing. Okay. Go ahead. I cream pie surprise you sometimes.
Oh, God. Let's not talk about it. Anyway, no, I already took a pregnancy test today and it's
negative. Good. I mean, damn it. No surprise, baby. No surprise. Do you want to talk about
irrelevant things on the planet? Like what? Well, we'll start off slow. What do you think of
Caitlyn Jenner barely agreeing with gay marriage? She went on the Eleanor Jenner's show out of all
shows to go out of all shows to actually say this. And she says basically that she's a traditionalist
and it's not she would never stand in the way of happiness, standing the way of anyone's happiness.
But that she's a traditionalist and that she just believes in a man and the woman getting
married and that she's she made it sound as if she just barely agrees with gay marriage.
You know why she did that? She's trying to stay in the news. So you say things that are provocative
and it'll stir a conversation. He's a genius. She is a genius. But I feel like the world has given
her such a pardon compared to adversities that usual like transgendered people go through.
The world has given her a gracious like a gracious almost like receiving of this new
person that is Caitlyn Jenner. We received her graciously. We praise this new person that she
is and she has the audacity to barely agree with gay marriage because she's a so quote unquote
traditionalist. Nothing about the way she looks. He's not gay. He's a girl. That's not true in the
show. He is neither here nor there. He she is as she is actually attracted to another woman who
was once upon a time a man. Uh huh. So it's like that's even more convoluted than just a she is a
lesbian. Right. So what I'm saying is it's so contradictory to her lifestyle and the fact
that she wants to put out this good message of acceptance in the meantime what she's going on
Ellen DeGeneres show and she didn't blatantly say she didn't agree with it but she took on the whole
like she she sounded like a Republican from Northern California and it really just made me
fucking angry on the inside. It didn't do anything for me because I don't think that he's gay.
What are you talking about? You're not making any sense. That's not a point. You're just eating
yourself. Obviously he's not paying attention. This is supposed. Yeah. Are you getting you're not
I don't know why you're so angry about it though. I'm about to start my period. So I'm just saying
you're getting angry about something that she did. She listen. I'm gonna just explain. I think this
is a problem. I'm just gonna explain something to you. Okay. He was born a woman. Okay. So when he
was a baby boy he was really a baby girl. All right. So you know he just had the wrong genitalia.
I don't know why I just grabbed my penis but I don't know why I just looked at you. Okay.
So what I'm saying is is that here's a woman. All right. That likes other girls because that's
how that he had to have sex with the Kardashian woman. What's her name. Okay. That's
besides my point. What's her name. Kris Jenner. Kris Jenner. But okay. Stop right there. Okay.
That's the same. It's a struggle from birth. Let's say he felt wrong in his own body. That's
what I'm like. She that's she felt wrong in her own body. She was assigned the wrong sex. Let's
suppose that's the case. It is. That's the same struggle that someone who was born and feels gay
from the very beginning feels. It's the it's it's a very similar struggle. I don't fucking agree with
it. I think the gay should get married. Yes. Okay. But I don't understand why you know you're
getting so angry about it. I'm getting angry about it because this is a supposed spokesperson for the
LGBTQ community. Right. Yeah. Who is actually not for the marriage of two gay people. Yeah.
Yeah. Like that doesn't make any fucking sense to me because and her her the only the only argument
that she has is because oh well I'm just a traditionalist. I'm traditional. I'll be I don't
let me tell you in tradition in tradition you don't take a fucking penis and invert it inside
out to turn it into a vagina and also you don't take a fucking flat flat pectoral man muscle of
a decathlete and turn it into fucking these size tits. That's not a fucking tradition you fucking
dickhead. No matter what Caitlyn Jenner's a fucking dickhead for that. Anyways let's move on. No
I don't want to move on. I don't want to move on because I wanted to say I can't believe you're
defending her. I'm not defending her. Here's why I'm saying the way why I'm saying what I'm saying
is because I don't even know what the fuck it is. I think it's one day I sort of got I'm at
fucking Gelsons right. Oh it you're calling her. I don't know whatever I was like be careful
retract that. I'm gonna retract it all right. Holy shit. Just listen okay. I'm not I don't mean to
say okay. I was at Gelsons and it looked on the cover of Vanity Fair and I looked at it and I go
who's I thought she was an actress. I thought that was all that probably the new you know kind of
Judy Dench. That's not how you said it. He said the new Judy Dench. Bobby looks over at me and he
goes what is that. That's not what I said. I didn't say that. Honestly. I look I look at the
situation I go I don't really know how to feel about it. I honestly don't know what it is.
I don't want to judge but you know it's so kind of weird that I don't want to even want to talk
about it because I don't know how I feel about it because I one way it's like if I don't support it
I'm gonna be hung and I'm gonna be you know burned alive you know so my theory and what I've been
doing is I've been just kind of going I'm be defending it. Let's defend. So let's I'm defending
you know and let's just move on. I'm not trying to take away her right to be a her. Am I in
trouble for even just saying what I just said. I don't think so. I'm trying to be completely honest
and I look at Vanity Fair and I go I don't know you know and I don't I don't know I have no feelings
about it. I do have strong feelings about it but I don't want to talk about it right now. Oh wow.
Yeah yeah so that's it. You talked about it on my previous podcast and straight up called it an
abomination. I did. Wow let's retract one more thing. Let's retract that and I did not say that.
I did not say that okay so let's just move on from it if you want to move on but I'm just saying
that I don't know why you're so angry about it. You're the most labile person on earth like one
day he'll call it an abomination and then when the next day he's Mother Teresa all acceptance.
Let's just hold hands and sing the fucking kumbaya. That's because I have no like I'm just confused
by it all. Maybe I'm maybe I have issues I have to worry about that I'm working on or whatever.
Like your own sexuality because you bought that hat. Oh Jesus Christ man all right I'll throw the hat
away okay. I wanted to actually retract. Not retract but sort of soften some of the statements
that I said on the previous on the last podcast regarding you know the Filipino community not like
not being an inclusive of anybody dark skinned that I said that yeah and I was really like
sort of aggressive about it too. I don't want to retract it I just want to soften my comments
because all our dark Filipino fans were outraged. No it's because I when I look I have a lot of
friends who are in the industry back home who are talented who make money that way and yes
perhaps you know they they've gotten their way because of their good looks but it doesn't mean
they don't work hard and I felt like I was a little bit too critical of that but overall
my point was even you know who Viola Davis is Viola Davis from um how to get away with murder
and she was in the help too right. Basically very beautiful dark skinned black woman all my point is
not even Viola Davis could make it in the Philippines even with all that talent that she
has that gives that will win her an Oscar and an Emmy and whatnot if you brought Viola this is a
social experiment if you brought Viola Davis and all her talent and glory to the Philippines
they will give her a little dancing shoes give her a little clown suit and say hey dance dark
lady in the side of the corner and be the comedic relief. You think I went to Korea that I would
ever if I was born that I would ever make it no they would have put me in prison or some sort of
like asylum or something right prisons that's why we were going to go parks barbecue my photos
aren't up there because they don't they don't think that I'm talented I know we talked about this
I'm just saying though so I'm just saying that I really gotta see this all right we will but that's
that's the final thing the final thing I'll say about that is I just wanted to clarify that any
of my friends from the Philippines who are just doing the grind and working hard out there and
yes you're pretty you know what more power to you I just wish that my 14 year old dark dark skin
niece doesn't think that that's the standard of beauty doesn't think that that she has to look
extra pale with you know perfectly straight hair and slightly upturned eyes and sort of
mestiza to be valued in that country well and if every cosmetic product in the market is a
fucking skin lightening lotion there's a inherent fucking problem in the media and it's not it's not
the it's not the people who are watching the tv's fault it's what the media puts out essentially
right so anyways Gilbert all I'm saying is that I'm trying to pave out a future for your black ass
thank you all right gold medal foods the gold medal is just on our fucking start my period
okay when I say she's so self-righteous too you know what she does right even when she's wrong
she'll defend her wrongness you're wrong I'll give you an example I'll give you a wrong I'll
give you an example right I saw a documentary on John Denver okay I you know I love the dude okay
first of all he's the male equivalent of Rachel Maddow because you don't know what they are no
Jen Denver looks like Martina never too yeah they you look at them like is that a man or a woman
right ambiguous ambiguous right but so I go then I said wasn't he in the movie oh god with
George Burns about God and she goes you mean oh god you devil no I didn't say that I got excited
what'd you say listen to me he says he said do you know that he was in the movie oh god and
out of excitement because I love George Burns and the only recollection I have of a movie that
sounds like oh god is a movie called oh god you devil which I watched with my dad when I was five
years old so excitedly hang on excitedly I turn to him because you're gonna lie you're about to lie
right now I'm not gonna fucking lie just let me fucking finish excitedly I look over and I said
oh oh god you devil and he looks at me the same way he looked at me when he asked if I knew Kaiser
Sozee he looked at me with that whole you dumb bitch you don't know no this is what she does
so when I go no it's not called that it's called oh god and she goes no it's called oh god you devil
right and now I have to go no you're wrong okay we looked it up and the first movie is called
oh god period all right look look at me right now Gilbert that's what it's fucking called yeah the
second movie the sequel is oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god to you devil okay so it's basically
as if I said this have you seen star wars and she goes you mean star wars empire strikes back
and no star wars first one okay but she gets so self-righteous and she she wants to defend
even when she's wrong you know what that's what you love her how was I wrong when there is a
movie called oh god you devil because you thought the whole movie the very first movie I'm sorry
I was two years old when it came out you were at prom please forgive the memory lapse here here's
another argument that she has with me is is that when I know information right that's more my time
period she she'll go it's because you're old that's how you know this information but then my argument
to her is is this is that well I know a lot about Akira Kurosawa right and he was way before my time
yeah okay I know who um Kurosawa is but I don't he he faults me for not watching every single
Kurosawa film she hasn't seen any of them that's not true I've seen them in lapses or when I was
younger it's because listen you grew up in the 70s you saw seven samurai yes you've already
showed me seven samurai that's the one I've seen but listen listen so my theory is things that were
made in the 50s and 60s carried over onto TV in the 70s when he was growing up in the 80s I know
more things about pop culture relating to the 80s and 90s because that's sort of those were
my formative years that's all I'm saying so you can't fault me if I don't know things from 1950s
I don't know the fucking whole almanac of things that existed in those years in the meantime pull
up a fucking picture of hold on I'll whisper it to you brought to you by menstrual cycle I know
I'm gonna pull up a picture right now yeah Gilbert would you like no hold on I'll do it and then he
I will ask him who it is okay oh it's one of these things again yeah and I'll tell you this and
and he's gonna be like how do I how do I eat why should I even care about knowing who that person
is this is only here she's only doing this to make me feel stupid no because I'm trying to
stay to point you know what sometimes you're getting old and you're sort of out of out of the loop
with what's on and going right now is that true I don't know I mean hang on who is this what's
your demographic at your stand-up show would you say people there's a kids there are kids there
go ahead like high school okay hang on I'm gonna show you the picture first what is it
okay you'll know that is who is that let me look at closer you only need one look
he's a basketball player well very close but you're wrong what is it Drake that's Drake the singer
uh-huh that's what I'm saying in this day and age he doesn't know no that's like you know I'm
gonna I'm gonna argue against him you just fucking made me mad you don't really listen to hip hop
yeah that's one of the things okay my my music knowledge only goes from okay the velvet underground
all right into Roxy music into Bowie clash talking heads I'm more alternative always and punk I've
always been all right I never liked RMB I never liked hip hop I don't like it all right I there are
some albums like low in theory daylight souls earlier stuff um you know I like Jurassic five I
like more kind of like you know kind of lighter you know hip hop but never so the reason why I
don't know who Drake is is because I don't like the music yeah but that's so therefore I'm here's
listen okay my argument is this is that what you know when I ask something like do you know
Kurosawa it's a little different than I you know do you know who Drake is because Kurosawa right
is one of the best directors ever to live on planet earth but you always come every time you come
with that a certain type of argument and I agree with you I think that people should enrich their
lives by knowing a span of cultures a span of movies and all of those like time eras yeah I
agree with you but what I'm saying is sometimes you sit on your high horse of Sufjan Stevens music
and you say oh god uh if you don't listen to the red house painters of Sufjan Stevens or
or da da da da da then then you make people feel stupid for not knowing these these white boy sad
Minnesota bands no I I any of those kind of songs that there are more like particular like I like
sadcore and I like softer stuff but I would never say that about those bands what I would say though
is is that you know if you know if you if you claim you like alternative music right then you should
know the beginnings of it which is you know the underground right so that's that's my argument
no that wasn't the argument that we were having we were talking about righteousness we were talking
listen if you're a guy who grew up on hip hop I wouldn't expect you to know who the read is and
whatever right but so my arguments are always like oh if you like that well then you should
know this that's all you know I that but what I'm saying is is that what you do you should just it's
called oh god you devil it's not called that I mean you're this is what you are a master at doing
you are a master of making people feel like shit for not knowing all the things that are relevant
only to you it's like instead of educating them and saying oh you know what example it's the same
reason why you think that if someone doesn't like the Beatles they are probably of the lower
like class of people in this world you know and you are so strongheaded about that it's like no
it's just a subjective thing some people that's not music to their ears I like the Beatles saying
though that but you tend to sit on a high horse when it comes to music and you're raw I'm just saying
you talk to people about music like you talk about denim jeans that you know you know if you
look at anyone's lists no matter where you are in the in the world right and anyone credible like
even you know England magazines like you know Q or whatever right that if you go what's the top
10 albums of all time any music you know I mean magazine or critic a Beatles album will be in there
okay white album um Sargent Peppers you know that's all I'm saying is that it's just not me
you know it's not me I'm telling you a fact yeah but let's say let's suppose you live through the
80s and that was your heyday whatever that wasn't the Beatles were not no no no it broke up before I
was born not knowing Drake is like not knowing who Madonna or Michael Jackson was in your formative
years that's all I'm saying so you're complete you're comparing Drake to Michael Jackson no
popularity wise yes you see you're saying that Drake has an album that's as iconic as thriller
well iconic would take time right iconic becomes iconic over the years like I'm sorry thriller
just just stop wait that's not what I why are you twisting my words I'm not twisting it all I'm
saying you're saying that Drake no don't see it look I'll tell you what I'm saying okay well can you
not tell me what I'm saying okay don't tell me what I'm saying I'll tell you what I'm saying
because it's coming out of my mouth okay I am telling you that in terms of popularity for the
for teenagers today yeah it's parallel or it's on par with teenagers being fans of Madonna or
Michael Jackson in the 80s in terms of popularity for that era yeah but Barney Barney was popular
among kids this doesn't necessarily mean it's good I don't know anything about him but I'm just saying
that for me it's like I'm not talking about Michael Jackson I'm the reason why I like Michael Jackson
thriller in an off the wall isn't because of the fact that he was popular it's because those two
albums right are masterpieces okay I agree so what I'm saying is is that if you're saying
that Drake has an album on par as thriller then you know you might be I then I'm wrong I'm not
arguing in terms of the reason why I don't know Drake I guess that's also the reason why
you need a fucking hearing aid because that's not what I've said I'm not defending the reason why
I'm not telling you Drake's content is the best thing I'm not a Drake fan I'm just telling you
that sometimes you sit on a high horse and pretend as if everything that you know is
everything everyone else needs to know but you're trying to make one of me because I don't know who
Drake is and I'm telling you to make fun of me because I didn't know who oh god you devil was
no oh no I'm not saying that I'm just saying I said you know oh god and then you try to correct
me saying that it's not called that it's called oh god you devil and then I was like no you're
wrong no I said there was a movie like that anyways I'm just I'm just saying you guys are so angry
that you're so beautiful together wow phenomenal couple I'm telling you right now this is actually
how we argue every day this is very stressful for me why okay should we move on I'm probably wrong
about all this but I'm just saying she I'm just trying to win an argument the reason the reason
I get amped about it is because he just called me righteous when there is no more righteous of an
individual on this planet than Bobby Lee in terms of his fucking high horse about music there is no
other person who's going to make you feel shittier about not knowing a movie or a song or an album
than Bobby Lee and he will make you feel uneducated he will make you feel completely
like an irrelevant citizen of the fucking world if you don't know who the red house painters are
no that's not why I never have given you shit about the red house painters let's move on your
mind we have a friend who's dying that really made me mad just now what you just did we have a friend
who's I have never done that just FYI just stop for a second okay I'm telling you right now I have
never ever made anyone feel bad about not knowing who the red house painters is I do make people
feel bad if they don't know what the white album is okay okay and that's the argument I if you don't
know you know certain things like you know you know let it bleed or exile main street with the
stones and you claim that you love rock and roll then I have to correct you that's all but that's
you're not talking about me I'm not saying you in just in specific generally yeah so what you're
saying is is that my righteousness isn't about like my opinion it's just about a general statement of
if somebody claims they love you know I mean Asian movies for instance and then and then they go
I don't know who Akira Kurosawa is then I just go well he's probably the number one guy of all
time but you should know that that's all you know it's not it's not you know I'm if you that's called
righteousness but for you to use Drake as an example is to me in comparing him to Michael Jackson
I'm gonna say this is a tie so let's move on it would be all I'm saying is Gilbert is not stupid
because he doesn't know who to share him a phone is I know that is but I'm saying I know I'm just
saying as an example if there was a third person or a fifth before the people who don't know who
that is who is that all I'm saying is that's how Bobby makes me if you don't know one thing makes
you feel stupid okay let's move on maybe it's okay okay maybe it is a character final statement
final stop I'm gonna stop right okay I'm gonna listen it it's it's a character defect of mine
and maybe that's not a good character trait that I have I have one final and I want and and you know
what I will change that about myself I will do everything I can and next time I'm in a social
situation and they if I run into some guy and he's like I love rock and real role all of it I'll go
oh you like the Beatles who are they I'm gonna sneak then go you know what you're you have every
right to not know who they are not like that no I'm gonna do that there was there is a really
really smart man who once told me that that the greatest way to receive or it the greatest way
to approach people is always with like by teaching not judging so if someone if even if they ask you
the dumbest question or if they just like sound like absolute like retards and you're like how can
you not know that I find that you know the best way to do it is just teach them enlighten them Bobby
you don't have to make them feel like poo all right very good quote Roger you know that was Roger
by the way don't make them feel like poo Kalayla all right so I want to just say this I've learned
a very valuable lesson I really have this listen to me higher value okay I learned a valuable lesson
about my character defect of mine which is I'm very righteous about the things that I know and I
should not judge or ridicule somebody if they don't know what I know and I and I will I will be zen
about it and I will be more of a humble teacher to somebody okay and I apologize to you and now
I've learned things on this podcast and Drake is the new Michael Jackson that's all I need that's all
I need to know he's not he's not so um Drake if you're listening my bad all right you're the new
Michael Jackson I thought you were a basketball player I thought you were a basketball player
Kalayla what did you learn from this because you have to learn something as well I learned that I
very aggressive when I menstrual yeah and that um I'm very resentful when I feel bloated and my face
looks like a giant balloon that's why you look Latina today and she also spent the night in the
hospital last night right I did I spent the night at a hospital doing a fucking sleep study that
didn't work because these sleep studies they they put all these 40 different wires and electrodes
in your head and your chest and your legs and they're supposed to measure your like they're
supposed to um um observe your EEG waves your stages of sleep your heart rate your everything
respirations and look for abnormalities right but the the the sleep clinic that I went to was set up
for people who sleep between the hours of 8 p.m. and 6 a.m. which is just not my schedule at all
so I ended up going there and I I told the dude I was like look dude I don't sleep till 4 in the
morning so I was wired up and texting him and I'm like I can't sleep at all yeah she has my sleep
schedule no they wouldn't let me go oh I wish they would have let him come like I it was awful
and I the reason I'm getting the sleep study is because I spontaneously stopped breathing in my
sleep and all my cardiac episodes all my heart episodes um happened in my sleep so I'll go I'll
have a resting heart rate of like let's say 49 beats a minute or 55 while I'm sleeping and
spontaneously it'll go up to 230 beats a minute as I'm sleeping do you hear this when you're next
here well no the I had a heart monitor um for a month and that's what it's like sleeping as an R2D2
you'll sort of like to find them like and you're like oh my god what is that because I had a little
sound thing on my monitor what is that but I often wake up um I wake up gasping a lot I wake up
like this oriented and and so um they're trying to find like an abnormality what do I sound like
when I sleep tell them oh he does this thing right it sounds like he's sucking dick in his
are you eating something and then and all of a sudden you hear hear this I'm just all my
dreams are about eating food yeah and then all of a sudden you hear the tapping when when today
yeah yeah I'll talk it's so weird and then back to sucking yeah yeah anyways I said something
um in in the middle of our heated argument that I want to touch on um we have a friend who just
got diagnosed with mesothelioma and he's given a year to live English please oh mesothelioma is a rare
form of a cancer and it affects the lies the the lining of your um of um your peritoneal cavity
your abdominal cavity and it can also affect the lining of your lungs and it is it's usually
most people get it from exposure to asbestos you see those commercials so let me just tell you the
background so basically what um this guy is yeah about six or seven months ago and there was a time
where callila did stand up you know that right she would do open mic she said she did it yeah she
did open mic so I did it for three weeks she did it for three weeks but she was you know people
said you started dating you is that after oh yeah after we dated oh he forced me I didn't
yeah she was good though but my point is this though so she because of the open mic scene she
got to do shows with you know certain comics and she there was two that she had mentioned one
black kid named jack night oh my god he's killing it right now yeah he's opening for me in San
Francisco this weekend good opener I found him well okay and secondly a kind kid named Quincy Jones
who's um a kid a black kid from Seattle they're both from Seattle they're both from Seattle and
he's they're both very good so Quincy opened for me in Sacramento um about a year ago and he was
almost too strong great he was amazing yeah he's great and then um I didn't see him for very very
I haven't seen him since maybe three weeks ago I was at the comedy store and I see a guy who looks
much like Quincy Jones but maybe like 60 pounds lighter how was this kid 26 that's just 30 maybe
I don't know he's 30 that's that's just his stage name is queen he's not really the real
Quincy Jones okay and I see you see this guy at the comedy store and I go hey you look like Quincy
and you go it is me and I go what the fuck are you losing weight for you know and he's like no he
has cancer and so it's been um a really sad situation because I um listen I don't know the guy that well
you know all I know is there's only two things I know he's a nice guy and he's also secondly which
is he's very funny and those two things you know it reminds me of a kid named Angela Bowers
who was another kid about three or four years ago who was open micro he was extremely talented you
could see you know when they go up that you can see a future you know and he died you know he
was in a car accident he died and um it's really devastating when that happens and I'm a huge fan
of comedy you know I I love supporting young people I love seeing what's you know what people
are doing and um Quincy is this one of those kids that um has it he really does have it and it's a
really sad situation you know I don't know exactly what to do you know I don't so I propose something
is the cancer you know at stage um any type any form of mesothelioma it's always a very grim prognosis
you only give him a year but he he sees it as well okay the the age is in my age is in my favor
you know we're not talking about some 70 year old diagnosed with um you know cancer we're talking
about a young guy but mesothelioma is a very aggressive cancer so and there are only very
very few specialists that deal with it but his medical insurance doesn't allow for him to undergo
certain types of surgeries like unless it shows that the chemotherapy is like working on the
mass in his lungs like things like there's so many like logistics that he's fighting because he
doesn't have good insurance so I told Bobby I was like look he was devastated when that kid
Angela Bowers died and there is there is a greater sadness I feel in losing funny people because
it's like when you lose an artist their work is there to stay forever their paintings and
they can they can be big postmortem postmortem they can still have like they can be legends
right after even well after their death but you get you see a guy like Angela Bowers or you see
a guy like Quincy and I'm not saying that he's going to die tomorrow I hope that he lives I hope
that he lives past his his that um prognosis right all I'm saying is how do you preserve
all his funny he's not going to be able to physically be here and and and and say those things
how do you how it's like and I told him it's like look like why don't we be museums museums for
for for comics why don't why doesn't somebody give this kid a special yes he's a nobody yes
yes he doesn't have any credits to his name but I already know he's extremely talented and he's
probably funnier than a good 85 percent of comics that have Netflix specials I'm telling you this
from the bottom of my heart and I've seen a lot of comics he is so funny and I told Bobby it's like
look do we put our money together and and just record a special for this guy even in a small
room that's such a great idea actually record it just try to shop it around with the story why it's
not about also I just want to preserve really no place to really air it right now maybe um create
a channel for him but I just think that um having a special you just pick you know put three cameras
up in the belly room at the comedy store or whatever you know the lighting and the sound and
just invite everyone out and uh just tape it you know and just preserve it but um so I asked him I
said look are you up for it is this something that you would be interested in he is like Kalyla
there's no there is no there's nothing more that I want oh you got it but we have to time it situation
though where he needs money too so it's like you know his he doesn't have good insurance right so
where does he go to the um what hospital does it go to so he goes to LA county and granted LA county
has very very they have great doctors there it's just that his insurance has limits you know he
can't go to certain like he can't go to like the city of hope the cancer center there he there his
insurance just has limits and um we'll post his go fund me um link on to the description of this
episode and um I think that you know Bobby and I have talked about this extensively in the last
two weeks and we really want to create this for this guy listen this guy is such a nice guy he's
so talented and he has no money and this is not you know this is a real thing you know it really is
I would not even mention it if it wasn't real it's it's a devastating situation and um and he has no
family he has no family so it's like his closest family are stand-ups and they're all generally
open microsoft as well so they don't have money you know so you know if you can donate at least
five ten dollars you know I mean anything helps it will go a long way yeah I mean um I generally
would not do that if it wasn't a serious situation but um it's it's breaks my heart and it's um
it's just a sad thing it really is you know you see comics my age that are not funny and
they're still any names a lie I can't I can't mention any names but there are people that
have kind of made it that have absolutely no talent you know I mean and then there are those
who are young and they and it's a pity it's a pity it's a pity when you see somebody doing it right
like just doing the daily grind and you see that abundance of talent that's just so untapped yeah
and you and then you it's met with even more dire circumstances like death it's it's the worst
possible situation and I just feels like we both feel so compelled to do something for him because
I mean Bobby's work with him there's a reason why I plucked him out of an open mic and said you
have to open for my boyfriend because you are extremely talented and you know Quincy Jones right
yeah his his comic name is Quincy Jones his real name is Kwame Wallin yeah so I'll post that on the
in jack night that's not his real name either it's wait isn't it jack it is jack well that's his
stage name what is it like jaquim yeah something like that I don't know why I don't know why people
do that is your name real name Bobby yes for real yeah and that's why yeah I was hoping it would be a
story like Robert but he has his Korean name is Songwoo Songwoo Songwoo Songwoo yeah wow you like it
that should be your just straight-up drama acting name Songwoo no yeah no yes okay see wow it means
apparently success I don't know what it means and it's not real I currently didn't work should we
um should we talk about something um like lighter or do we go deeper and be sadder
well I'm here I'm looking at your piece of paper Kalei has a paper with some words on it what is
snapchat oh yeah I know what snapchat I mean I want to talk about this thing what is I want to
talk about something that's been bothering me and I'm Kalei like it's a snapchat morning morning as
in like morning like no but I want to talk about something else aside from that that's very simple
I'm not gonna go deep okay and it's driving Kalei like crazy I'm trying to defend this person
but there's a comedian we're not gonna get into who it is we reached a DP in like oh we you've been
teasing this so much we're gonna talk about right now let's just do it we're gonna do it yes okay so
I've been doing stand-up since um 1995 I started in San Diego and at the comedy store and I did open
mics or whatever and then maybe a year year and a half after I started doing it that fans started
doing it DP DP okay and so we're both San Diego guys you know we grew up together in comedy we've
never been friends I mean I I mean if I saw him at a comedy club I would probably hug him and go
what's up or whatever right but um I don't ever have any interactions with him through phone or
even through social media we follow each other on Twitter and Instagram but um but anyway he's
you know he's a guy who you know he's an asian kid my age and he won last comic standing a long
time ago and first one his Instagram and Twitter drive Kalei la fucking crazy I don't even follow him
to the point where she won't follow him I don't she complains about it all the time but I just
like check it every day and the things that she doesn't like about it oh no can I may I go ahead
may I it's this isn't a character assassination as I'm sure he's a very kind individual and he
is like everyone else a struggling artist a struggling comic this isn't anything to to
belittle him in that way I just think he is a social media atrocity and I want to be the Olivia
Pope and fix it for him okay that's where I'm coming from the thing that he he does number one
that drives are crazy is he likes his own photos number one he likes his own photos
always yeah 100% there are this is it's driving me he also ads and hashtags himself at all of his
captions all his captions so it'll always start with at that fan oh you know at the Fox Studios
today blah blah also the bragging the bragging the humble bragging it's not humble bragging if
it's out it's outright bragging that's bragging it's it's like her thing is that he he he booked a
show right now let's not go there let's not go there that's not important we'll get to number one
don't like your own fucking photos please number two you don't hashtag or at yourself is that
wasn't the second thing is don't tag yourself in your own photo yeah don't add yourself yeah don't
hashtag your own name yeah don't go on Bobby come on just like pick my brain here please like you
know you know my frustrations with this yeah he also does things like um he'll post a photo
and then he'll post another photo of the same photo but closer up so it will be a far away shot
of him playing the guitar and then the next one will just be a zoomed in photo that's fuzzy now yeah
yeah um there's number four yeah do not fucking buy followers do not do that whole oh because
that's a strong accusation oh this is a very you know what i've gone to the extent of this is an
obsession of mine there was a point where he had three he had he had as many followers as he did
he was following oh so he thought it was an exchange program like hey you follow me i follow you
you know i mean that's how he talks by the way yeah so then then one a week later he had doubled
the double followers so she goes what the fuck so she researched she went into other i went into
three thousand of his most week so he went up in one night crazy in one night he he went up three
thousand followers and when i looked at the photos that he was tagged in because usually that's how
people get followers is either they've been tagged by someone extremely famous like maybe in his case
david hasselhoff right yeah and and so i was like okay so what's the reason for the increase in 3k
because even an example look okay i've this is a fucking science in my head if joe rogan who has
half a million followers tags bobby in a photo bobby will gain about two thousand followers
so in my head i'm thinking for that fan to gain 3k followers in in 12 hours david hasselhoff
had to have tagged him so i did all my research he was there was no david hasselhoff and in each
photo he has 6 000 followers but he still gets 12 to 21 likes so i'm thinking she's very she's
she's all about stats and like you know like followers versus like how many likes you know
i mean she's very like asian about it right for instance i'll give you an example how crazy she is
like i came home from san antonio right all right all right anyway she's very she knows it
good good one go ahead babe go ahead claula has pulled out a knife i she pulled out a knife
i thought that you and i were actually trying to be a team here we're a team we're a team we're a
fucking team i'm olivia pope and you're one of my gladiators okay okay that's that's you don't
you watch scandal yeah oh look at his instagram right now and he noticed that he puts he writes
down quotes and then he puts that as the caption as well you're right right so what that's another
thing so number number 17 thing number 17 of what not to do don't don't write don't instagram
a quote that you just wrote on your notepad right don't instagram that fucking quote and then have
the caption say exactly what the photo says so if your photo says live laugh love your caption
should not say live laugh love yeah that's all i'm saying and then there's a couple of things i
just in my opinion that's a little weird that i might have to mention which is he went to vietnam
which is a good thing to help okay no no this was my gripe i will say it bobby or you say it i will
say it being that i was once upon a time in the medical field i feel like it is you should always
respect patient privacy i don't think that you have free reign to go to a leprosy clinic and take
pictures of you you know praying at their feet like i know that you think that that looks good
and people are going to say oh wow you're such a great person wait can you explain the picture
okay let's leave here the picture is of him praying praying like doing like there's like
there's obviously a man who's definitely he's leprosy and he's also at the verge of he's on the verge
of death he looks very sick right nine-year-old man so he's not even aware that that's there
right he's not that's on his hands and knees praying on him like yeah but that you know
me think about what you have to do hey take a photo of me praying next to this bad guy and the man
was like obviously in this like grimace like you could tell there was discomfort in his face yeah
and when i look at the picture it's so self-serving of that yeah he's not doing it i mean look again
this isn't i just said it wasn't a character assassination but i'm just saying number one you
don't you don't know this man's family you didn't he didn't agree to be photographed in a painful
moment in his life however now you look like a fucking you know civil servant now you look like
the greatest guy on earth in your head i mean here listen he's a nice guy okay he's extremely he's
one more thing i'm not he's a talented guy he's trying to you know he's trying to do comedy
which is very difficult to do you know i um oh and i call the number on his bio so he has a bio
that's the number and he says like call my managers or not call my manager call my agent right hey when
i call the number i don't ask me why i call a fucking number okay why did you call the number
because there's something wrong with me in the head there's something like seriously like i have
i have but anyway the the voicemail on the number i probably probably changed by now but
was obviously him pretending to be another an agent yeah yeah which is fine as comedy i guess
i guess it's comedy listen he's a nice guy all right bobby i if he's playing if he's playing
anywhere near you go see him i menstrual right now so i get to say whatever the fuck i know you do i
know you do i think mercury is still in retrograde so i'm gonna blame all my attacks on the fact that
i'm literally on the verge of just bleeding profusely out of my vagina so and also um on instagram
follow him dad follow him it will better your life at that fan follow him um it's a wonderful
instagram twitter another thing i just have one more thing to mention and this applies not just
to dad fan but to anybody i'm not an actress i'm not a comedian i'm just not in the industry at all
like i don't have a headshot i that was not what my life trajectory that's a complete lie because
i have seen footage of you as a host for an MMA show that was a favor beach MMA okay um foreskin
how dare you number one second of all doing that dude that was a favor that i did for somebody who
was creating an MMA show okay so go fuck yourself all right look at a battle awesome is it battle
long beach no man don't how embarrassing that was a favor i did for a friend anyways look i i feel
like la or where we live even i'm sure you guys see it all the time it's saturated with so much
with a very very thick layer of artifice already everybody's fucking artificial everybody acts
artificial but look i understand that to be in this industry there it's it's necessary to have a
certain like layer of grime about you right what i don't like honestly is when people brag in a way
that's not self-promotional anymore for instance if you're shooting an episode of something on
the fox lot on the universal lot on the cbs lot whatever don't take pictures of yourself at every
fucking corner of the lot yeah and then and then humble brag about it it's annoying because it's
annoying because it's like guess what extras get to do that too so what just be fucking humble like
his his bragging tethers on the verge of what i feel is delusional yeah i mean it's just like
listen i feel guilty about it too because like on my instagram like when i did ncis i took a photo of
me and ll cool jay that's cool though it's like i know but then i feel weird about it you know look
that's what i'm saying like you know when i was on love i did one with me and jillian jaycups or
whatever i feel like and i posted it like you know okay here's the difference here's the difference
between being um to self promote which everyone needs to do if you're in the industry it's necessary
you have to promote yourself you are what you are trying to sell right you are your own product of
course that's what social media is for but there's that and then there's delusion and there's the idea
that you want people to believe you're something bigger than you're not than than than you are yeah
and that's what uh that's what basically like gnaws at my asshole that's what gnaws at my soul but
to defend myself i'm always the guy that says that says like i'm my career shit which it is
yourself deprecating enough i think this is ultimately no this is ultimately what it is i'm
struggling you said it you said it you said it right here i think i've had a moment of clarity
right now yeah that is the one thing that i feel my biggest issue is with his social media yeah is
the fact that as a comedian he has zero self deprecation as a comedian you you have to to
make fun of yourself to make yourself feel stupid to make your that's actually that that's the most
valid point you just i sort of got you just made a very good point just now that is true it's like
even if you're a good-looking comic right like jazzle neck or christelia like in comedy they're
supposed to be good-looking right they do do self deprecating stuff you know i mean chris not so much
anymore but like he has you know and it's like that's that's something that is i think very valid
baby thank you you're welcome so per my observations finally i would like to say that i don't dislike
this person that i know nothing about him i'm seeing him from a only from the from the angle of
social media and i call i lecune that fan would like to offer myself to be your olivia pope and
change your social media i realize you do have a manager you have to yeah you have to but i feel
like i can turn it around for him yeah i feel like look my social media is bullshit because it's all
of bobby but i'm not promoting it i'm not promoting anybody but bobby yeah but that if he listen if
he doesn't have the self-awareness already though you can't fix that you can't fix it you know there's
hope no there is if you're already listen if he's already if he doesn't have people around him
first of all that said that tell him don't do that he needs new people around him you know
so get a new agent and get a new manager whatever because it's like you know like i've my my eight
managers have said that why did you say you know i mean the vietnamese people were jungle asians
and yell at me about it you know i mean and then i never did it again right but it's like you know
you need people but now he just calls filipino's jungles yeah because now yeah but anyway i switch
this race around but my point is is that you know you just need a team around you the same right
and no one is attacking his comedy because honestly like i know people say always a one
trick pony he just does he just does the vietnamese accents but guess what there is a market for that
and guess what older white people who are sort of racist love that stuff so so there is a market for
that type of like cruise ship humor right yeah so i think but i think that if he just had in korean
there's a word called nunchi and if he had just that sort of like that sensibility and that common
sense about social media that i actually think he could catapult himself and even pigeon help
pigeonhole himself in in in the right environment where he could be making a lot more money catapult
himself cat i mean come on i'm trying to be positive because i think i don't i don't know
his comedy very well oh i do okay well i mean that's your hi my name is gilbert uh and i'm not a fan
of death but what i'm saying i i i'm i'm putting out my services for free come on guys all right
let's come on let's move on from this and again i'd like to be let's move on guys tomorrow i probably
will retract all of these like very aggressive and borderline bullying statements i mean it's just that
you you know we shouldn't have done a podcast today because you're just on a fucking rampage
right now baby but this is really who i am i know it is you're going crazy i think that it's all these
all my many many hours of destiny that's getting into your do you know what my doctor said what
because we got the results of my heart monitor and he's like look halala like
something is going on in your sleep and he asked me i'm not this he wasn't even kidding he's like
is there any way that someone is putting drugs in your drink before you sleep yeah bobby lee
and i i look i looked at bobby and i was like dude are you why would the fuck would i fucking do that
what a weird thing to do why would i do that i've watched enough mystery like mystery diagnosis
number one i've been sober for almost 14 years okay so i don't even know where to get the fucking
shit number two you're acting as if i'm giving you drugs to sleep so i can play destiny is that
your fucking theory that awesome theory i don't know that's not why because sometimes you i don't
do that i mean like nine o'clock at night you you say things like hey are you tired let's go to bed
let me yeah that i yeah that i do i always go hey aren't you sleepy you should sleep because i'm
gonna about to play nine hours destiny that's one thing but to drug you i would never do that
so anyways the miss it's a it's still an unsolved mystery as to why i have
cardiac episodes in my sleep that's always good but you know what we're gonna get to the bottom
of it and um that's um we're never gonna give up okay what are you not gonna give up you and i
yeah we're not gonna give up we're gonna find a solution to it oh i thought you meant as a couple
we're not gonna give that up you know even though even though like you've been very
confrontational this podcast i'm confrontational with a fucking wall with the cats with everything
oh can i ask about that video that was posted on uh instagram of you i'm so confused i didn't
know if that was real or not that she like came up to you while you're playing destiny tickled
your shoulder and you freaked out like a crazy person i can i tell you why can you explain
fuck you gilbert first of all you look so scared i know because listen to me right now if you
shit fuck look at it look at me right now okay when i do anything okay 100% okay so when i have
the headphones on and i'm playing dust right and i don't know she's home right oh okay so i don't
know she's home all right so i'm playing games and all of us and i see a paranormal tickle in my pit
right it scares the shit out of me all right you look like really i know but i'm telling you right
now i don't i don't want that fungus shit on my nipples yeah you talk like that again i'm gonna
you're gonna get fungus all day okay so no that's not being a bitch i was scared wait a second don't
ever do that again it's not being a bitch i was scared wait a second i i wasn't even finished with
my rant because we started off talking about this the snapchat morning oh that had nothing to do with
dead fans the snapchat thing had nothing to do with it i know i know what did it have to do with
baby quickly i will say snapchat another thing about social media you know how like some you
can like somebody in irl like in real life but absolutely start to detest them after you see
their social media oh of course anyways oh god don't mention i won't mention anyone's name but
there's this person that i follow and i felt so awful for her that her friend had just passed
and truly i truly i felt i don't think you should be i don't think you we should talk about it in any
case i'm gonna say it okay because this is also my podcast without names though right no but here's
the thing people just as another ps a do not mourn on snapchat do not do not take videos of yourself
crying and telling us why you're crying and then snapchatting candles and then all the pills all
your painkillers and then switching the camera back to yourself and then crying let me tell you this
that's a little fucking weird kalala died no one would see me on social media for two years i would
disappear it would be so devastating to me okay if you died probably the next day hey guys i'm back
yeah i'm back i'm back i mean i do a vine a practical vine dead body yeah am i crazy am i the only
no you're right you're you're exactly correct i feel like it's a little bit we all mourn differently
and there's no fucking correct universal standard for mourning or whatever but for fuck's sakes look
gilbert if i fucking die dude do not go cry on snapchat please that there's another thing that to
me is still back to being self-serving it's self-serving you serve not the person that passed
you serve your ego today okay let's fucking go on then it's the most negative it's a famous social
media person it's not a famous social media it is it's a star a social media star she's a friend
she's a very nice girl but then i can't say it to her face so i might as well say it to the rest of
the world so don't say her don't say her now do not say her name so anyways i still like her i
probably still have a drink with her so whatever so um let's mma minute yeah i have a long
um mma minute good going on your rant babe no i'm not gonna rant because you have to give me your
two cents on this okay all right so my and are we ready for this gilbo baggins where we at my
mma minute this week um is about well we'll not involve any type of um fights or matchups or bedding
it's uh i want to talk about mark hunt you do mark hunt is mark hunt mark hunt the fighter heavy
weight fighter from new zealand no you've seen him no big fat brown guy oh yeah yeah in pride
have you seen him have you seen old boy go over yeah literally the guy who for so long people think
was could not be knocked out i mean he would take kicks from crow cop right to the fucking dome
and he just would not go out look at him that's his picture mark hunt i know well anyways he he has
a book out it's called born to fight and i was reading little excerpts about the book and the
details of his life are completely horrifying get into it let me tell you what happened in his life
so he was raised by a Mormon mom and dad he had a two brothers one who suffered from schizophrenia
his dad used to not only like verbally abuse him but he used to hog tie him and then beat him with a
branch right and then his excuse me listen why are you laughing and then his father
why are you laughing because this is sad as i know it's just the way your father used to beat
up with the branch no but no the thing is is that i used to got beat i get beat so it's not really
that's not that's not he doesn't care about what was done to him get into it get into it his sister
okay the dad the Mormon father fucked his sister from the age of six to 18 years old
oh man and the mom how about older goes younger yeah he was doing olders for
youngers and he was he was and the mom was in on it not only was the mom in on it but the church
the whole town attended everyone turned a blind eye to it as a matter of fact later on when he
brought his wife julie to visit the parents like years afterwards the mom like in a jovial manner
was recalling a story about how she caught the dad how she caught her husband fucking their
daughter in the bathroom and she laughed about it and made it seem like oh but that's that's no big
deal how awful is that his brother ended up one of his brothers ended up committing suicide
this guy was you know was in jail multiple times he led sort of like a criminal youth
you know type of life the only reason he got discovered is because he was out of
in a in the middle of a brawl outside of a bar and there was some local promoter who saw him
basically beat everybody up and he was like hey dude like do you want to get into the ring
are you going to say that he's like our version of Muhammad Ali like you did with drake which is
really a pity for somebody who said who watched pride you should know who mark hunt yeah he's
very he's a legend but i want to get to what i think is an even more important topic than that
is that here you have a guy right who is probably predisposed to some type of mental illness given
the abuse that he's gone through in his life and he's entered a sport where he gets repeatedly
kicked and punched in the head those two things together is a recipe for disaster in my book
what is that book titled it's called born to fight but i'm saying do you know why why
do you ever heard of like you've heard of junior seo yeah i love junior
shut the fuck up bobby i do he had his he had only he had a restaurant in san diego and it was
really yeah he is from san diego you're right oh shit i love you i love junior seo he was a
charger he was a defensive linebender oh my god he actually knows i didn't know you were a sports
person he killed himself yeah he killed himself but do you know why he killed himself he was
extremely depressed he all of his i think his family said he he became this like really happy
man to this really sad the reason why they say that he did that was because of the concussions
in this right so there's this thing called cte and it's basically it's an encephalopathy it's
basically from like chronic trauma to the head right but they're not able to test athletes who
like do combat sports until they die because you you cannot look you can't do an autopsy of the
brain until like like post mortem or after they die so basically what i'm saying to you is a guy
like mark mark hunt gilbo baggins if you have an opinion about this a guy like a guy like this who's
had such a traumatic life and then now sustains traumatic like brain injury you don't want him
to be like a chris benoit remember chris benoit wwe wrestler who ends up killing not only killing
himself but his daughter and i'm sorry his son and then his wife don't you think that's concerning
listen does the ufc even take care of their fighters like with medical after they retire making
monies you know he doesn't get paid the fucking ufc has had disputes with him because they don't
even want to fucking pay for his flight sometimes yeah and this is a fucking legend mark hunt is
a legend all i'm saying is look i want to know if the ufc is going to take care of these guys
after they retire they did open that new medical office in las vegas but a guy who is who lives
in new zealand say for instance who has use it yeah well i think that's bullshit because of all
people that should have access to medical care and therapy and like everything should be people who
the vets yeah yeah of combat sports pretty much yeah you want to find pride to get some free stuff
yeah anyways that was like you know what drove me like crazy is is that like to think that jose
although is i looked up like how much he's worth he's only worth a million dollars that's nothing
that's nothing he's had so many championship fights i just think what the fuck is going on these
people should be making millions of dollars because you're not kind of mcgregor ronda rousey that's it
yeah that's what brendan schaub calls the one percenters right yeah yeah yeah so anyways that
was my mma minute i'm glad you had so much to say about that it's great rest in peace jr
what literally man that was a great podcast man we're not done we have one more thing yeah
i'm sweating why are you sweating a helpful advice with bobby and collina i'm bobby lee
i added that today all right um hello tiger belly i'm a 25 year old guy from the uk i tried
on a pair panties not too long ago and to my surprise my ass looked really good in them
i snapped a couple of photos and looked them over i got really horny and started jerking off
to pictures of myself fast forward a couple months and i own way too many panties and regularly post
them on reddit think uh they all think i'm a woman i'm never gonna tell them that i'm not
what the fuck is wrong with me thanks love the podcast and hear the pictures and look at the
pictures it's a man so he posed he wears panties really good he takes photos of there's a woman
though no that's just a really great man ass that's really good i can make bobby's ass look like
that in that photo let me say something right now there is nothing wrong with that i'm you know what
i do and claud is a no when i masturbate i grab my own ass i do actually i caught you once in the
bathtub he was crouched over forward like i'll grab my own ass grabbing his own ass yeah and it is
because i think i'm sexy so i'll even say do me do me like that yeah but that's just because you're
like straight up a narcissist i don't know if this guy look love thyself you're a one-stop shop for all
of your pleasures like this i don't think i don't necessarily think this is a bad thing
if you you don't even need a girlfriend at this point you don't even need like material to jerk
off and you are your material yeah i mean i just think that um he has a nice ass you know
mine's ass is not like that and i just think that he has every right to take photos of it
i don't know what but do you think that it's wrong do you think that it's wrong that he posted
what the fuck is wrong with me do you think that it's wrong that he posted and deceives men
no i think that's cool okay so if you because i'll tell you why i think that's cool i did one time
i would i swear to god i was at the um the billboard awards was that what is that that's
the thing the music right yeah the music awards and i did mad tv hosted it one year right so i played
i forgot i think i played connie chung or whatever yeah so i was dressed as connie chung
and i was hitting on dudes right and they were as a bit right no it was on camera was like backstage
and stuff like you would walk by and go what's up i wouldn't say anything but i would like squeeze
guys's asses and stuff and they really they thought i was a girl and i kind of got they
thought that i was hot it kind of got off on it like i was kind of half hard in my dress
good stuff anyway that was a great and you're saying you're definitely not gay right i'm not gay
why does this always come up i don't know because if you think i'm gay if he's seducing if he's
deceptively seducing men and then he gets turned on that they think he's not he he kind of thinks
you're gay she thinks we're both gay i know that's not a very farfetched idea what you need to do
right now is you need to go on the bed and relax and go to sleep and get some good beauty you need
some good beauty sleep babe anyways bobby's gonna be at the san francisco punchline this weekend
october 15 through 17 thursday through saturday night and also um we're gonna need your um support
um leave us a kind review on itunes and kindly sub subscribe as well yeah try to subscribe and
leave comments and stuff in reviews because it's like this is new and we want to get this thing going
and this should we talk about the all things calm anything or no no we don't have we don't have to
do that yeah but that might happen but anyway um thank you for listening we love you so much
tonight bye guys
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