TigerBelly - Episode 71: Margaret Cho and the Yellow Telephone
Episode Date: December 14, 2016Margaret is the president of all Asians. We talk mummified bodies, training your parents, and Tilda SwintonSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at htt...ps://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today
Oh
Welcome to an episode the episode of Tiger Belly I am your captain and I'm your leader
Bobby Lee, and I have my beautiful girlfriend
And we've got Gilbert and let me say before I introduce our guess
I just want to say that I this is a dream been a dream of mine. I whenever I see Margaret
I I just get Gaga. Do you feel that from me Margaret? Yeah, well, it's always an honor
To feel Gaga from it's very
Yeah, it's well as you should because I'm a little bit older than you so that is true. You should
show that
Nuna respect, but not not that much respect. Yeah, I'm just a nunna. I'm not a gem out where I'm not you know
I don't look at you as an Ajima or a Nuna or a komo. No, you're not a komo
Grandma and aunt
And it's like we say a koonimo koonimo. Yeah, but you're not a koonimo to me. No emo emo is a aunt on your mother's side
No, you're always on your phone. You're more like Hananin Hananin
Hananin means God
So we have Margaret show give her a round of applause everybody. Let's do that. Why don't we do that Gilbert? Thank you very much
Clap your hands, man. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Gilbert. He's a gay Filipino. That's true, but that's okay
I know the motion
He said you eat a lot of dicks. Yeah, I got the cock part the part was obvious. They're very delicious
Don't eat bad ones. They're delicious. The good kind. Yeah, and this is my girlfriend Kalilah. She's also Filipino
Beautiful. Thank you. Nice to meet you. Very lovely lady. Thank you. Thank you, Margaret
and I have to say this is that um
The reason why I get gaga is because of the fact that I um, I don't know if I'd be doing stand-up without you because I think in the
Mid-90s, maybe 94. I saw you on your HBO special and you were you know, young
I'd never really had heard of you before and I was watching you and I go it was the first time you saw somebody that
um
Asian and also specifically Korean that had a voice that you could relate to, you know
Because I had seen Tamayo Atsuki on something and she had a thick accent. I love Tamayo. She's great. She's great
She's she's insane and funny. Yeah, I didn't really relate to her and
Johnny Yoon was a little way too old for me. He was older, but here's a woman. That's a girl who's Korean who is hip and
and
you know attitude and
Very American and I was just like oh
She's the female version of me and a year later. I started doing stand-up. I love that
I love that. It's so nice. I'm so proud of you. Yeah, and you and I are very similar in many we've struggled with things
Yeah, that's a different thing
That's a different thing. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What's that?
medicine
Medicine
Sometimes we need medicine over the years. We've needed it. Yeah, and I'm not yaku ma ni moga sona
Many subtitles to edit for
Not not go to moga jjigam
With the dick
Yeah, so you know
You just got sober again. Can I say that ask you? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sober. What I'm sober lady
How did you because you when I met you you were sober? Yeah, I was sober a long time. So what happened? Well, I just
Just didn't think that it applied to me anymore
You know after you have a long time without any drugs or alcohol you kind of think
Well, I was one of why don't I get to do this, you know, and yeah
It had to do actually with marijuana becoming legal for medicinal purposes in California
And I became very curious about that and so I got a prescription and then you know
They they do say that it's not a gateway drug, but actually for me it is, you know
Because I thought well if I do that then everything else I can do also which is
drinking and using a lot of different drugs, but
You know, it doesn't really work with my
Metiae, you know not not built for that kind of stuff. Yeah
I mean, did you right away like you smoked pot and they were like how long did it take you to do other things?
It took a while. Yeah, it took a good long while to start doing other things
But when I started then I found that I kept just decrease decreasing my need for
Marijuana and increasing my need for other things that you know, we're not so positive, you know things like opiates and
Benzodiazepines and and and alcohol in combination in concert
Yeah, it's not the best
And especially if you you like around the early
2000s you could get whatever you wanted online, you know
They weren't really regulating anything and you could sort of get whatever drug you wanted including
things
You know like replicate replicates of quailudes that they're making India things that have no medicinal value, you know at least
for whatever it's worth there were some
traits of like certain
Prescription drugs that I guess would I guess we're of some assistance like Xanax or or
Percocet, but you know, like you don't abuse them. You certainly don't take them with alcohol. Yeah
So I just did a lot of that kind of stuff. Yeah, I miss that though
Yeah, I got sober in the early 2000s and you told me that when we had we were eating at Greenblats one night about the internet
Mm-hmm. I was just like I could have died and maybe because I had a what does this guy named Paul Vato?
And he's this fat Mexican dude who he's a second-city guy very talented very funny guy
But I would have to he would get I don't know how he got it, but he would come into my house with like
200 Vicodans. Oh, he's a dude in up in a bag though. Yeah, you know me and he was just handed to me
I would give him money
And then sometimes he would be on the road. I couldn't get any so I had to resort to other things
Mm-hmm, but I if I would have had the internet, I don't know. You don't know how to use a computer though. Thank God for that
What do you mean? We were at best by yesterday and I said open a new folder and he doesn't know like basic
Yeah, he just iPad and and smartphone. He you're like Hillary bitch
She would use those like
Blackberries have a staff member by those antiquated blackberries because she didn't know how to do anything else, right? Right?
Not even like a desktop. Well, that's what the email stuff was about. Yeah, you know because of her ignorance of technology and stuff, right?
So they just kind of went we'll just they didn't know they were doing it. What's it? What is worse that she is I?
Let me say this I would be able to fucking figure it out
Okay, yeah, I mean, I it's like it's like you say that you say that I'm I wouldn't be able to figure it out
I would call somebody good. How do you do it where I would go dunking come to my house? Get me by gonna? He would do it
She provokes me you get mad you get mad you can't get me. I don't know. I love her
No, I'm not so pretty. You can't see he only pretends to get mad around people, but he never gets mad
I'm never with mad. I mean she sometimes says things that are bothersome
You do bothersome things, you know, but I swallow like we've been together long enough to where it's like everything just
Like yesterday yesterday, we were I was smoking a cigarette outside. Uh-huh. I
Put it out. Mm-hmm. I blew out the rest of the smoke out of my mouth
Yeah, right then I walk in the car and she goes you're trying to kill me, huh?
That's not like that. Yeah, you did some would you say that that's not what I said
You brought the cigarette in with you
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, you can't smoke around her. Oh, well you okay. I smoke though now. She's defend. That's good
No, my best friend smokes, but she's so considerate about yeah, where she is around me. I will never do
This is my longest relationship, that's good. That's good. That's good
I've never been able to do before the long relationship. Why not but two years I get um, I
Just kind of get not bored, but yeah bored
You know me because there is an excitement as you you know
We've talked about it Kalyla and I when you meet somebody for the first time in that initial bullshit fantasy
Shit that you go through, right? Mm-hmm, and then six months goes by and you're like, I fucking hate
You know, but I never had that with her up with Kalyla. It's been like I want to be with her
Yeah, and but it's I mean uncharted territory really to be honest with you. I think that's wonderful. Yeah
I mean, you're not in a relationship. No, no, I'm not you're done
I think for now. I mean, I enjoy being you know, I haven't been single since I was five years old
I've always had
Um, some somebody since I was five. Oh, like we talking about what your brother then. No, no, no
I had a boyfriend when I was five
His name is Marco we were together until we were six
Where his family moved to you, yeah, so then I had another boyfriend when I was six
We didn't I wasn't cheating on Marco. Yeah, you had broken up first
No, there was no overlap. Yeah, we had broken up. We never really broke up, but he moved
And so I I met a new guy at my school
Because I changed I changed schools. Yeah, because I wasn't in kindergarten anymore
So now I had gone to first grade and I was six and I met a Brian
And he and I would play Batman under the jungle gym
So we had our
area
where we were and
Yeah, so consistently since five years old. I've had a relationship going
You're saying that you you you don't know what it's like to be by yourself single. I yeah, I've never been
I mean not well since I was single when I was four
That was a while
Yeah, it's been a while. It's been a good forty four years. Yeah, because you
What does that feel like when you're finally, you know, oh, it's great. I could sleep in the middle of the bed
I inch my body all the way to the middle. Yeah, it's really fun. She does this thing. It drives me fucking crazy
I love how he's just I love you. Go ahead. No, it's out of log. No, it's unload. No, I'm just saying she does this thing where
Her little fucking jungle toes, right?
Can I just ask you a question? I don't want you to agree with me. No, right? No, may I ask you a question Margaret?
Yeah, of course. Is the Philippines in the jungle?
Um, there is jungle there. I guess so. Yeah, no, no, there's no guess. I don't know. It's a factual thing
We have jungles. Yeah, they have jungles, right? Yeah, and there are people
I put them together
jungle people
The jungle people it's not racism. It's a factual thing. Okay in many way eskimos are snow Asians
Right, they're from the snow. Yes, right
If that's not offensive
But there's something about the word jungle that makes people go crazy
Because you associate it with
Probably apes and monkeys and things that are just a little bit like wild creatures
And we have a lot of my we're a metropolis manila and severe big cities. There's cities. There's not as I get it
There's also tree people though. Yeah. Yeah, there are also tree people
Like you see that move that that show body bizarre. Oh
Yes, what is that? Oh, I've never seen that word about that. What's your life? It's on I think it's on tlc
No, it's on discovery. Oh, it's on discovery and it's people with like
You know, I mean, they're born with a mutation. Yeah. Oh, you know, like weird diseases and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
You know, I mean like a guy with his eyes on the back of his head. Oh, wow
So he's walking around. Yeah, there's a woman in china who has her feet completely backwards
So she's had to learn to walk forward with backwards. Oh, that's so weird. Yeah, that's really weird
Oh, I think I've seen that with the guy that is um, his head is upside down. Yeah
That guy's so intense. That's so intense
Like head like the outside down and it's his whole turn his neck bends backwards. Yeah
So he's like like when you're doing a limbo, but an overstretched like oh, shit
So his head is like so his neck is like the top of his head
And his head is in the back like it's very intense and then I get suicidal because I have a bad audition
Tell me about this. You know, like, I yeah, I'm watching that show last night going. Yeah, what am I?
Look at this. Look
I can do this. Yeah, Jasper. Yeah. Yeah
Yeah, yes that lady in Thailand Thailand
She has elephantitis of the arms. Uh-huh. She can't do this. No, she can't
She can't and she sells candy on the side of the road. Oh, yeah, like of all the professions
Yeah, when you have like the largest hands in the world, maybe not sell like tiny
Oh, that's all man. It's gotta be hard. Yeah
Like sell like mammoth tusks
Yeah, something rhino horns, you know, something that fits the arms really, to be honest with you
Is that rude? Is that rude? No, no, no, I don't
I don't think we should do that more as people
Compare ourselves like we've got it good. We've got it pretty good
I mean even compared to like Koreans in Koreatown like we don't have to work
We don't have to work in a store of any kind. Yeah
Um, but I want to make the arc that argument. What?
Let me just make the argument. Yeah
Is that because people say that a lot like you're lucky
You know, you don't get to have you don't have a day job
And you don't have to you know work dig holes
But it's like digs holes for a job. Whatever
I don't know. I don't know what job what hole digger what a construction people do. They dig holes
Yeah, yeah, some of them. Yeah, sometimes but also
So as Margaret knows and I'm not I'm just saying that
Yeah, it's not as if I won this job
In a lottery
You know, I signed up. I went through years of struggling just I just want to throw that out there, you know
I mean, but also I don't do enough of me going
I should just be grateful that I I can breathe
And I can see yeah, I can hear. Yeah, we should be grateful for those things
Oh that we don't have to work in a piano store in Koreatown
And that was the worst. Yeah, that's the worst the piano store. There's so many piano stores
So you could be really aggressive about you know, your pianos
And they're all the same. Yeah, also a wig store. Oh
Oh, I was I was born in a wig store. Oh, yeah. Wait, what? Okay. Yeah, my pair. I grew I was born inside
Literally a wig store. Yeah, and my my cradle
Is it what they call them cradle crib crib? I call the cradle the cradle because of the lullabies. Yeah
Yeah, the old lullabies and my cradle was in the mannequin
Storage room not creepy. Oh my god. Not creepy. Right. So there was like 50 like mannequins staring down at me, right?
And I'm a little baby. Oh my god. Yeah
Maybe you're scared of white people. That's right
White men just all over you the whole time. That's right. That's right. We're so scared, man. That's why I'm so scared of George all the time
and Bryce all the time
This guy's like, hello, Bobby. Yeah
I'm intimidated by white people because of that experience
but um
And then I saw did you were your parents violent or or strict in that way? Oh, yeah. Yeah, totally, but then they were
also
Pretty busy. So they were more abandoning than they were
You know, because they were never around
Because they were always working to be done. And when my generation, we never had babysitters
So I remember just being alone in a house and I was like five years old, which is so crazy to think about now
Yeah, it's crazy to think they are but I was just like by myself
Oh my god using the stove and shit. They had they owned a but you had a boyfriend. So I had a boyfriend
But they also owned but was it porn?
They had a a gay bookstore which had porn in it, but only gay porn no straight
So it was all gay
Gay erotic novels a lot of tom of finland
picture books and
photography books and so there was a lot of
Really like confused my mom like looking at these
Is
You know that
That they would make
Like it was hot like physically hot like it burned her. How did two koreans choose that? How did they choose that over?
I don't know, but it's like uh, it's like what it's like when philippinos point at things with their lips. You guys
Yeah, you guys go
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, they do a lot of that. Oh boy. Oh, yeah. Yeah
The worst one they said jugo boy okay, uh
What did wait? What is that jugo boy okay? Yeah, which means I'm gonna kill you and then throw you away
Wait, throw you away
Yeah, yeah, and as a kid I understood with that man
Throw you away
Throw you away this pose of your body
Dispose of the body. Yeah. Yeah for sure. Like just kill me. You know, throw me away
Yeah, but they want to hide the body so they don't go to prison because they're smart
Yeah, they're fucking smart. Yeah
Um, oh, you know what? I talked about this on a podcast once when like your parents your Korean parents meet like your friend
And they just miss them. Oh, yeah. Yeah. This is charlie. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
He's a good. Okay. Okay. You know, they don't yeah, they don't even want to lock eyes
Yeah, and you know, you know, acknowledge them as a human being. Yeah. Yeah, it's so weird. But um, so they had that
Is that why?
Because you have a huge lgbt
Is that I mean because you talk about that in your bat. Yeah, and I'm also bisexual
So that there's also that there there's a lot of that I brought into
Which is great about growing up in the gay community because I knew where I
fit in
Um, but also like my very early material was about growing up in that gay bookstore
And and and being around that and talking about gay stuff
Which in the 90s wasn't really
Very uh popular for comedians. You certainly didn't see a lot of that
Also seeing an asian american woman doing it was so groundbreaking
I mean even for me, I went to go see you uh, you're taping for your special in the long beach convention center
Oh, wow. Yeah, I think that was in 2008 probably 2008. Yes. Yeah, and
Listening I had brought my best friend jessica with me who had never seen you do stand up for and she's a korean girl
and
She left there and she was never the same like she thought that she she was allowed to just fuck just about everybody
She's always kind of been like, you know, sexually more like conservative and whatnot
And you see a what an asian woman talk about it so freely
And it kind of just opens you up in a different way, especially for her and I being you know
Just young 20-something Asians were always told to kind of be mums the word when it comes to like your sexuality
Of course, and it just broke us open like seismically too when we became whores in our 20s
You know, and it was really
But I love you, but in a really nice way. Yeah, that's wonderful. That's wonderful
I think that's great. I think it's great. I'm free and to feel good about it
You know, would that make because I've had
Gay experiences would that make me a bisexual or not? Maybe
Only if you uh wanted to continue. I don't want to
I don't want to
I mean, I admit to the ones that I've done, you know, I have no anal
You know what I mean? But I've sucked. No, I haven't but I've sucked a lot of pps
but before
Before the
All right, don't look at me that way
before I would the age of
12 13
That doesn't count. Thank you. It doesn't
Well, he's lying. It actually went up to like 17 18 according to your brother. No, my brother fucking doesn't know
How could I first of all
I was 17 when I got sober the first time and I stayed sober for 12 years. I didn't do it every time I would have
Judging. I mean if you did, it's fine. I don't care. It's fine. I don't have you know, it has no bearing on my how I feel about you
I know, I know
I'll just ask it's nice. You can take as much dick as you want, babe. Okay. I'm cool. It's your voice
I'm fine
Jesus
But you know what when you were talking I was thinking
You see shows now like fresh off the boat. Mm-hmm Ken show. Mm-hmm
That doesn't that's to me not
Not my experience. Mm-hmm. There isn't a show
That shows like because the Asians I hang out with
these ones
I have hundreds of other ones David chose a good friend. Mm-hmm. My brother's one, you know
And we we're more this
Your our experiences. Yeah, we need to get something on the air. Yeah that shows that
I would think that you know, it should have I mean it should have happened by now, but we should do it
I mean, there's definitely a rebellious streak in people like yourself and me and and of course David
And uh, we don't see that yet. Yeah, you know somebody that's just
Really, you have to be such a rebel to do to break out of the culture that we come from. Yeah, you know and
Even even David like I saw his documentary. I was shocked at how
Uh much deference he had for his family and how much of a sort of a church boy like a moksa and names boy
Yes, too. Yeah, um, but and to be so incredibly
Bold and driven and different and and really irreverent as he is. Yeah
But that's been my experiences with Koreans though. Yeah, but maybe
You know, I just have a specific kind of experience because I'm in show business or whatnot and these are the kind of Koreans
I meet but generally even before I did comedy
The minorities that would meet were more my type. We so you're saying that we're the jungle Asians
We're the actual ones from the jungle
The guns and roses
Not the literal
But I want to say something right now and this really made me mad
Can I lean forward? Yeah. Yeah. I've been close to you before. Yeah. Yeah, you can
Is Thursday
I was reading for auditioning for a movie. It was a stoner movie. It was five lines. Okay. Okay
And of course, I'm gonna read for that movie because um, I'm
I've really got nothing else going on really, right?
I mean, I you know, people know who I am
But I'm a cost-and-up and I want to work and you know, so I'm sitting there
with these five lines and they're okay lines
And a kid walks in
Who's auditioning for the same part? It was Steven Yoon now
I looked at him and I go after your audition. I'm gonna yell at you outside
Uh-huh. So I took Steven Yoon out there. I didn't yell at him, but I went
How do you not get an offer? I know that's crazy. That's crazy. Yeah, he's in the the big hottest commodity
Hotest show right now. He's so he's a cult. He's in the cultural. He's so cool show. He's I love him. I love him, too
I love him and he goes dude. I gotta read. Yeah, we all have to read. Yeah, but if that was a white dude
Yeah, yeah, let's be real
This that that would he would not have to deal with that kind of shit. He would not have to read no for five lines
No, it's true. It would have been an offer. What he wants to do this movie five lines. Yeah, yeah offer to him. Yeah
Yeah, but he had to sign up wait in line and I find it to be fucking
Crazy, it's crazy. It's crazy
You know, it's like I could understand if it was just if it was me
You know, I mean, I had a point where I was hot 10 12 years ago. You know, I do the road. I draw. It's fine
I know where I'm at. I'm not complaining. I love where I'm at. I have a great podcast. I have you
Margaret's here. I love my life, but I know where I'm at in terms of
You know real like movies and showbiz and all that stuff, right?
Him
I love him and he's a cultural but he's like that guy from Breaking Bad. What's his name?
Aaron Paul. Yeah, Aaron Paul Breaking Bad
Lead in movies lead in a tv show. They come out the same level
They're both the same thing. They came out the same level. Yeah, I guarantee right now that
Aaron Paul would not audition for five lines. They handed to him. Of course not. Of course, they would hand it to him and I mean, it's
you know
to
Not
Think of this as a racist business. It's just it's of course it is
it is
and the the truth is is that
Um, you know, we have to read we have to go in for things and it's shocking. Yeah
It's shocking especially for somebody like him
Yeah, I thought I can't believe that. I can't believe it either if you guys have to read
I mean shit makes me look like my path is almost impossible. You're never gonna. You're never gonna. I don't think I am now
I don't think I am if you guys are fucking reading
You're up. Yeah. Yeah down there. I mean, no, I want you to keep going this kid right here
I mean, we luckily found him but he is so talented. He's from second city in chicago
Awesome, and he's very talented. Um, but it's fucking hard enough. You guys are really shit
Well, it's also yeah, go ahead. You know, but it's also that there are
Fewer roles for asian americans that that's the other part of it too. And so you're constantly battling people's ideas of what
Um, we can do, you know, and it's it's like we have to try to expand it
That's why it's always better to just write your own projects and create your own work
And just do stand-up comedy and do different things. It's hard. It's really hard
Here's another thing that pissed me off about the audition
What
In the you know, how you get you get so anyone listening when you get an audition you get a sheet
It says where it is at. Who the director is all that fucking bullshit, right?
But there's always sometimes every once in a while. There's like a little specific note for you
Mm-hmm for me. So attention bobby no accent. Why is it to you?
I don't know, but they were telling it's I
This audition wasn't for an asian guy. Mm-hmm. So they had to specifically tell me that I don't have to do an accent
As if you as if I was going to come in there go. Hello everybody
I'm a stoner
You know, they had to specifically give me a note that seems racist to me
You hate doing accents. I know it's pretty racist to me, but to read it on the thing and it's specifically say
No accent. It's crazy
Made me think that they thought that I was going to go in there and just like getty wannabe it
You know, I love getting one. I do too. I love him. He's a sweet guy. I don't know why I just said that
No, no, no because of the legacy of long ducked on. Yes, that's why the thing about it is he's really funny
I love him. I think he's great. He's a nice guy too. He's a really nice guy
But the the fact is that we're not given roles that are
Worthy of us. We are constantly having to sort of wade through and do whatever we can
Oh when and then when there is a role
That's supposed to be for an asian person. They change it. Mm-hmm to a white person. Mm-hmm
You know, they did that with 21
They did this one too. Yeah, recently. Dr. Strange. Yeah
she uh
Uh, contacted me, um
That you know
This is um, it was uh
Uh, mrs. Swan, you know, um, alex. Yeah, alex borstein. Yeah, alex borstein
She hooked us up, which is the most ironic
She's a white girl. Yeah, right. So she doesn't to me miss swan was hilarious. I think it's funny to me. I like it
I think it's hilarious. Um, so she said is it cool if I give tilde
Your number because she wants to talk to you. Oh my god, and I go, okay. All right
And uh, so then tilde
Well till the email and it eventually emailed me and um
She said uh, uh that she didn't understand why people were so mad about dr. Strange
And she wanted to talk about it, you know, and I wanted to get my take on why all the asian people weren't mad
And you know long conversation
And it was so weird, you know, and I I was like
You know, she could you could you please tell them not to be so I'm like, I can't tell
Who are the president of all asians?
Yeah, well you are you are the president of american division, but it was like, yeah, I don't have a yellow phone under a cake
Yeah
Don't be mad. Don't be mad
Let's just tell them
Yeah, we should though have that there should be a yellow phone
Oh, yo
And a cake dome. Yeah, I'm nominating her nominating her. Yeah, let's do it. I think everyone with hands down. You're the person
Should we call cape? Yeah. Yeah, let's call cape. Let's call cape right now
Um, but we had a long discussion and she also wanted me not to tell anybody so don't tell anybody
She said don't tell anybody
Yes
And then I you know, but it was a long like kind of a fight about
Why the part should not have gone to her? That's what I thought. Yeah, the part should not have gone to her and uh
we had a fight about it and and um
Basically, it ended with her saying well, I'm producing a movie with Steven you and the starring
Oh, like I have a black friend. I can see I can do this. Yeah
Yeah, I'm producing a film. I'm paying my dues for your um for the asian so therefore I can be them
But at least at least she's producing a film with him in it. She was getting it too. I also
She was getting it. Does he have to read for it?
Yeah, five lines. He has five lines
He had to read. She ended up playing the part
Hey, Steven, I'm gonna do this now
But uh, it was weird because it was like I felt
Like, you know, one of not like like a house asian
You know, like I'm like her
Servant, you know, like the one like the ones like the when they have like, you know, like whatever in the raj
Or whatever they would have like the house servant. Yeah, sort of your confidant
Yeah, all those merchant ivory movies and stuff that happened like in india. There was always like the
The the sort of servant that was close to you and that's sort of what I felt like like I was following her with an umbrella
You know, it goes away. I had a weird feeling about the entire exchange, especially the part of don't tell anybody
It's also this as when you told me about that
We didn't get a deep discussion about it, but you mentioned it and I go, oh, they're they're friends
Yeah, but now it's not that
You didn't know I just made an assumption that you guys knew each other. No, I didn't know and in fact only knew her from
alex
Mrs. Swan. This is swan. Oh my
The other
Well, speaking of Mrs. Swan, the reason why I got mad tv
Was because Mrs. Swan was leaving
Alex is leaving mad tv, right? So they were like, we need, you know, maybe try an asian
Let's try to try to get a new a real asian. This might sound crazy, but bring a real asian
So four months into me doing um
Being on the show was terrible when I was first on it. It was terrible
But I get a call from fox and they said
Can you do miss one
Play that
And I go
No, I will not
If number one, I can't
And number two, I won't do that and they were like, well, why not?
Because it's not my character. Yeah. Yeah, and also that's not what I do, right? But just the idea
Yeah, that they were like, you know, he's asian
You know, I mean and we own the rights to the character. Yeah, it's like insane
So do you sit with all of this, you know lack of rules for asians
Do you sit idly by or do you get loud and angry? Like what is the right?
What is the recourse for like at this point? Do you I mean, there's only
A handful if you really think about it of people or voices for the asian community that are going to really say it out loud
Or a bold enough to say it out loud and you always worry about how is that going to affect your career?
In the long run because you don't think that you know being angry is the right route
Well, I know that Steven Park
Wrote a mission statement. Did we ever read it? You know, Steven Park? Yeah, I love Steven
Apparently he wrote a mission statement
And sent a letter out to agents and producers and whatnot about the plight of the asian actor
And he was thrown out of LA
What year was this that he remember he moved to new york, you know, I mean with um, what's her name? His wife
She's a great girl. She was on living color too that white chick. Anyway, he had kids with her
But he left LA for years and he came he came back
But um, I that's why I haven't been vocal
Because when I found out that he got thrown out
Like he couldn't get auditions. That's crazy. Yeah, that I was afraid to say anything, you know, now that I'm not working really that much
It's about being funny about a two which is so great. Yeah, you take it and talk about it in your stand. I do. Yeah, you're really funny
Yeah, that's the right. I think of course of action because you could just make it part of your work
And that's hilarious and then also gets the point across also. I'm not that angry
Here's my my point of view is that
I I'm it it hurts a little bit, you know, it's it's racism. I think it's racism
but because
I've made a living maybe it hasn't I haven't felt
The real you know, I feel more bad for
younger asian kids, right
That you know me want to make a name for themselves and it's just harder
But I felt like I've did a couple of hurdles over it
You know Margaret first sent them up. She jumped over. I jumped over a couple, right?
And I feel like it's getting a little better even though all these things are happening. Yeah, you still have Steven Yoon
You still have fresh off the boat is a popular show. It's a network show Randall's a great guy
Ken it's an asian show
So these are things that are obviously
new
So I guess in that way, I'm not furious over it and it's getting better and certainly what's greatest that we have stand-up comedy
Which is the best because you can do whatever you want
And it's incredibly gratifying. You make good living and I I'm just really pleased that I started off doing comedy
You know, that's it right there. That's the best. That's the fucking shit right there man. What did you say?
I just I'm gonna fucking hit you in the fuck
You're absolutely right. Yeah
You know the other night I made a couple a month ago not the other night a month ago
The lineup was me you Ali Wong and Steve Byrne on the same lineup. That's so cool. It wasn't an asian night
It was sold out like great other what the comics were on it
But we were like in the meat of the show the lineup and
that for
ask
Ask any comic that were it was asian like Jackson Perdue who's not really that asian, but you know, I mean, you know Jackson
Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he's great back in the 90s
And there's no way that would happen back then or no, no
No, this was the first and also kind of the very casual not big deal
It wasn't an asian show
We just happened to be there and I mean it's so great and ali is so fantastic
It's so funny and it's such a funny funny lineup. Yeah, you know really really awesome. Yeah, they're not they're all
In their own way strong
Comics, right? They're not like, you know back in the 80s. I'm not gonna name names
But I know that there were regulars at the store that were asian
They would just put them up just because of the color of their skin because they want to try to diversify
The lineup, but the person sucked sucked. Yeah, you know, I'm not gonna name any names
But you're looking at me like I know the name
I want to but I'm not going to
And this was not that this was
People that were like, oh, no, these are the best people that called in. Yeah, these are great comics. Yeah, they're really great comics
Yeah, it's amazing. It's really amazing. Yeah, but that other stuff it hopefully it changes
I think so. I think that
also
People will look at what you're doing in like what ali's doing and it ignites a whole another generation
Of people who are very excited about comedy and they want to go into comedy
They don't want to think about acting. They won't not thinking about anything else. They just want to be stand-up comedy. That's really cool
Yeah, I do every once in a while
How will have an asian kid
Go, you know, I'm doing it because you know, I saw you whatever
Yeah, and you go really? Yeah
But it's great. Yeah, it is, you know, my a reality, you know, I'm not getting my head out of proportion
What do you mean? I'm not getting ego right now. What did I give you a look? No, I just don't want I don't want
She doesn't like when I'm me. Well, you know what me. Well, you know me. Well, yeah
Yeah, when I'm like he thinks when he has moments where he thinks he's a korean Elvis
Oh, you're better
I'm much better than Elvis. No, but everyone's will sometimes I'm in korea town
Yeah, right, and I'll you know, I mean shot your name out and then I'll give her winks
Like if I take some photos and I'll give her a wink and it drives her crazy
I'm killing it right now, right? Yeah, you're always killing it, but you're better than Elvis. Oh, thank you. Yes
um
I I just want to ask about this next thing
Did you did you date tarantino? You did right? Yeah. Oh
He's come by the comedy store too. Yeah, I know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's great. He's no
I love him. I'm he's my favorite
Director, he's amazing. I really believe that. Yeah, I mean
That the that's I asked her that first scene in englorious bastards
between um, chris, uh, christoph waltz christoph waltz and that the family farmer
Yeah, it's so great. So good. So great. I could watch it a million times. Yeah, he's a great director. He's great
But that was um, when you were on american girl, I know which I also want to talk about
Was that must have been a crazy time for you? I mean you're young. Yeah, I was super young
I didn't really know what I was doing. I mean, it's
It's good. I mean, we we we had a really hard time. You know, it was a hard show to do
Why there was a lot of um, it was uh,
the first time you would see, um
Koreans in entertainment, um after
The la riots the la riots was a very big deal for koreans and um
So koreans were very paranoid about their image and so there was like all of this alarm about it and um, all the moksa names and everybody
They were like really concerned about how they would look and they didn't like me because I was a stand-up comedian
I wasn't a man
I was very dirty. I was talking about gay stuff. So I was not
The kind of image that they wanted to promote and then the show was on such a very big
You know, it was a on a very big platform because at that time there was only four networks
What network was this on this was on abc. Oh, shit. So it was a very very big deal and um, so the korean community
Felt like very invested from the start, you know, and then one of the problems was we didn't have all korean actors
Which was very hard to do. You know, we tried to do that, but let me see this right now
No, I wasn't I wasn't even doing comedy at the time
But I've tried to cast like I had a deal at comedy sensual. I had my own show
I tried to cast my mom and dad. We couldn't find anybody. It's really hard. It's really hard. I mean you use Clyde, right?
Clyde, yeah, I love him. He's great. He's great. Right. Clyde was the dad. Yeah, Clyde was the dad
He's super talented. He's really talented. He was on um, he's he's actually had a very very long-stored career
He was on like hawaii 5o and uh, quincy. Yeah, and uh, he's in a great action movie called the choir boys
He's in a lot of like 70s action films like really goes all in star trek and some shit that I love
Yeah, yeah a lot of great shit. Yeah. Yeah, really really great and jody long was a mom. Amy hill was the grandmother. Love her
She's so I love Amy. I love Amy. She's Filipino though, right? Oh, she's half Japanese and half Finnish
That's how you get a Filipino
Is that the concoction? That's the concoction
Interesting, right? Um, we had BD Wong. Um, and so so there's only one real korean in it
Yeah, and so that was a big problem, but then we really couldn't cast any korean actors
Because they were all already working on other stuff, right or they weren't in the right age range
We were looking sure sure and so it was very difficult. Oh my god
I can only imagine everybody else that all the korean actors were either like
very
Serious theater actors who had never done comedy. There were no comedians
So if you were to do it now, oh my god, you would you would be able to cast it right away? Yeah
Yeah, you could cast a lot. I think you'll be able to do it. I think so for sure
But back then it was really very very hard. So you had that against you. Yeah
People were like freaking out about that. It was freaking out about that and then we had um
A kind of a weird mixed bag of writers one of which turned out to be a murderer
Oh, one of the writers ended up killing his wife
It was super weird
That's why the show didn't work out
He killed his wife and put her body in the closet until it had mummified
And so we just didn't have the best writers
And he was our show right now, right it must have been talented
It was it was super weird the other show that he went to work on was the bill cosby show the second one
Not the first one. Yeah the next one. Yeah
So he did it at not during your show, but during cosby era. Yeah, right during the cosby era
He killed his wife. So but that was just sort of the caliber of people
And it was just very strange. Yeah, it was very very strange and also you were did they make you lose weight, right?
Yeah, they were alarmed at how fat I was which I actually looked back and I actually wasn't you weren't no
I wasn't but it it was that I wasn't television then and they were already so
Invested in this idea of like the kind of asian woman. That's like hot too
This is fucking I just fucking yeah, it's like what the fuck. It's crazy. You got it now
It's changed. I mean like when crista Alonzo. What's her name? Cristela Cristela Alonzo. Yeah got her show
Yeah, I mean she's she's always looked like that, you know, and she's yeah, she's great. I love her
Yeah, super funny, but they didn't force her to to lose weight. No, it seems like an absurd thing to ask now
Yeah, it is. Oh, it is. Yeah, but I think they that it still happens to some degree
Yeah, you know in in television for sure and in film, of course if it's if it's like an ncis
You know, Louisiana or something and some girl is supposed to be like a detective. Maybe
Yeah, in that in an action situation, but in a comedy. No, no, it's crazy. It's crazy
It's really crazy, but uh, so I was just distracted by that and um,
I remember like getting very sick. I was I was dating Garrett Wang
Um, who was Sulu from next generation. All right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Not the first Sulu, but
I worked a lot with George, I still work with George sometimes, but um, no, I dated uh,
Garrett, so I remember, um,
I lost so much weight in such a fast period of time that I was urinating blood
Oh, and it was like horrible and like Garrett. I was like screaming at Garrett to do something. I don't know what he could do
Let's go
You know hyperspace. So you basically went into like renal failure. Yeah. What were you doing to diet?
Just I was not eating. I was doing a lot of a fen fen at the time, which is a drug that has a upper and a downer component
It's illegal now because it's just caused a lot of people heart failure
But um, it you just didn't eat food. It was really bad
And that could what probably been the very early part of my drug addiction
Was uh to that drug and and having to really control my body, you know, it was I I just was terrified of losing the show
So I just did whatever I could
to lose weight and then that drug was out and then um
The studios you could get those drugs right by because uh,
Disney was right by all these sort of crooked doctors row and so I would go there and a lot of the um
Like different shows would go where they would send um
PAs down there to pick up drugs
Oh my god for your show just PAs would do that shit. Yeah, they would go pick up drugs in many ways
So it was like the producers and people all knowing
Is that what you're saying? They wouldn't know necessarily, but you could get you can get a PA to go do make a run
Yeah, yeah, and um, you know, because I was having all this trouble losing weight
And it was uh the order of people who let me know
There's this doctor down here who can
Ah, and so because I was struggling to get into these clothes that were so tiny and then also the fashion in the 90s
Was for women to be incredibly thin. Yeah, I'm not forgiving at all
No, so that was part of the that was the era of that as well
Do you did you have a bad relationship or a good relationship with gail burman?
Who's gail burman? I had a good relationship with her, but I was the executive producer
I felt bad for her because she was the one who had to tell me that I was fat
She didn't want to do it. I bet she would yeah, she didn't want to do it. She's not skinny. No, and she was so upset
Shot's fine, but she was so upset and I feel bad because it's not really her fault. She was just a messenger
Yeah, you know, and I never really got to make that right with her. I never I haven't seen her. So I don't know
But she's great. Yeah, I mean she was the president of fox when I was on mad
Yeah, she was the one where okay, so that girl that girl that I brought to the up front
So I met this girl. She wanted to be a comedian, but she had never done stand-up before
And I wanted to have sex with her, but she didn't she wasn't attracted to me
Basically, but she was using me to go to the fucking new york. Oh, well, that's right. Yeah, right. So she's she's like
I want to make it, you know, and um
And the first night we were there. I tried to make a move. Yeah, I just want to be friends
So now I have this girl in my hotel room for two days at the up front
so we have this gigantic dinner at
You know some fucking gala thing and all the key for southern and everyone's there, right?
Because they're all in fox shows
So we all have tables and I don't know where she is
Like I look up to my left
And I see her from across the fucking banquet hall. Yeah, she's giving her a fucking business card to gail berman
I'm a comedian
Right and I you know, my brother's rage. Yeah, you had rage. Oh my I fucking grabbed her wrist
Come on. I'm sorry gail. Come here
You know, man, and I fucking dragged her back like an animal
I go if you know, babe, you don't fucking the president of fox
You don't
That's not how you make it
You don't go to the president of fox
Which sort of eat dinner and give her a fucking business card
A headshot would have been worse. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh, she would have died
You would have killed her. I would I would have taken a fuck. I would have killed her. I would have been dead
You should have just completely disassociated. Oh, I don't know that girl. You didn't have to now
Oh, and then she can't go. What table is she at? Oh, she's at the mad tv table with who bobby lee. I'm fucked
Also, they're just friends. He's not fucking
He's in the friend zone. Oh my god. It was a disaster
Anyway, that's how I know gail and I know that she was your executive producer. Yeah, you know gail
nice lady is a nice lady and
My friend, you know, and I haven't seen her but I think she's great. She's great. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but um, let me tell you something right now
I just you know how I met Margaret. No
Do you remember how
How did we meet? I thought it was comedy show. This is what happened. What happened?
So there used to be a
night on tuesday nights on sunset boulevard called doublins
And they did comedy night and um, it was the hottest comedy night
I was that we're doing cook. You see. Yeah gang cook and when game was on fire
And I was a regular so I get to go up and you showed up there
And you go I just wanted to meet you
And I I remember collapsing
Onto the pavement onto my knees. Yeah, and I went. Oh my god. What are you doing here?
I never thought that that's I would like run into in that way. I always thought
You know, maybe we'll get a job together. I don't know, you know, but um, that's how and then
You invited me to your house one time. Yeah, that was nice
And um, and then here's what made me
Just just completely being on for
her. She invited me to your show in san diego
Now when you, you know, when I do stand up I do
clubs
Tops, you know, Irvine's probably the top which is 500 seats. Yeah
She sold out
thousands
People in a fucking thing. Yeah, it was a thing
Right and I remember waiting. I mean, I got free tickets. You got me in
Mm-hmm connections, but like I remember like waiting and like going into the thing going. Oh my god
This is so powerful
Like I've I don't know if I'll ever
Do that, but she did it. You know what I mean? That's how much that's how much she's killed it. You know
Do we have a square where we had time
53
Well, can I ask her what did you think of bobby when you first met him?
Like why did you want to go see the show like from well, I had been a fan from tv
And then I knew that you were really funny
I knew that there was like so much that I was excited to see and then I was like
Oh, well, I have to see you do stamps. So I I was excited to meet you and I wanted to come and meet you
I love your bodyguard
Is that your bodyguard? That's awesome. We were in San Diego a week and a half ago
And we were at a taco shop and bobby was sitting down and I was ordering at the counter
And a girl excitedly hurried over to me and she whispers in my ear. That's diva yoki, right?
Oh my god, that's a compliment though. I said, yeah, go say hi to
it. Oh my god. What did she say to you when she came up? They were looking at me. So I thought
Because I walked into this car. It's this taco place
And then they had left and ran into her and they were talking outside. I could see and then she laughed
I could see her laugh outside the window the best right and then she came and she goes
You can't believe what just happened. They thought you were steve. I could if steve steve like if steve aoki like
was like eight a thousand donuts
It's like different body types and then got like a piano fell on his head, right?
And you know, you know, he got compact compacted into a bobby. I mean, there's I look nothing like steve. I don't get
Oh, it's hilarious. I
I don't really know what he looks like. He's very svelte. Yeah, very skinny. Very skinny Prince of Vegas
Do you ever get people ever say that you thought they think you're somebody else or no? Are you Tilda Swinton? Yeah
So good a Doctor Strange. So good. Um
Um
No, they think I went to high school with them
They are like, oh, do I know my one my one asian friend in high school
Roger Chang, you know, very um, they think I'm somebody they know. Yeah, and what do you say? Do you say yeah or
I I go I don't know. I go now
Yeah, yeah, no, I just go no, I didn't go to that school
But do I mean, I always sometimes want to go no, I'm a comedian. What do you mean? Oh, just straight up tell them
Yeah, but then I don't because it's weird. That's when it gets weird and I don't like when you do this
We're like, where have I seen you like and they keep digging and digging and he's reluctant to answer
But finally he he gives him his credits and it's like, oh
He pulls up his eye on the deep end there. He's like, look, look, it's me and he googles himself
I never fucking googled myself
Yeah, but I have done I have done this where
You go they go, well, how do I know you and then I go, uh, and I keep throwing things out. Yeah, they go. No
No
No, and then you never get to like, you know something they know they know and then it's like, well, I guess I don't know you
And then because this we're like
So awkward so awkward like I wish I didn't do that
You know, so at the end of our episodes, we have a
Email that would they ask us questions. Oh, okay. Yeah, thank you
on hopeful advice with barbie kalayla and tilda swedens best friend
Hi, I listened to your show every week. I recently moved to ukm now. I'm engaged and married to an english guy
We've only been dating for nine months and getting married in march and his family freaked out and thought it was too soon
They decided to do a google search and found out I used to be a webcam model
And now they disowned their son and want nothing to do with both of us
I feel bad because he's always been the perfect boy honor student best university and great job. Please help. Please help from lila
So I guess trying to win the parents affection. Oh
If they're not happy that she's a webcam model and she was one right was one they googled her. Yeah
Why would they I mean, why would they but why would I mean why would peak their interests matter? Yeah
Why would that matter? Yeah, and she's making money. Obviously. Yeah, it's also not porn. No, I mean, no, I mean
Porn's fine. I think porn is fine. I think it's fine
But it's not porn. No, it's her naked like in front of a camera wanting to make up
Dude, let me tell you something right now. If I was a female and I was hot. That's all I'd be doing
I'd have a fucking just a camera on my vagina the whole time
Dollar bills just being changing. I mean, I don't give a fuck
But so what she saw her parents like, yeah, which
Like her boyfriend's parents for how do you confront that? Like I love you
I think that she should stand her ground and I don't think that she should waver and be apologetic about what she does
I think that's only going to put her in a in a not in a
You know what I mean? Like
She does what she does for a living for money. She's a good girl. She's a good person. The guy loves her
There's nothing else to it. But yeah, and if the parents are too concerned to tarnish their image
They can go fuck themselves and if they're willing to lose a son and a daughter in law from it
That that's that's a kind of family that you don't want to impart in yeah
Yeah, you know, I would think that that would be reasons to leave the family. That's horrible. That that's my gut
This is cut ties cut ties
Just get out because there's obviously nothing because that's just the beginning
Yeah, well, she can do good go to med school and try to prove him wrong. Right. Yeah. No, right
It's also if they're that, you know, like
Like that picky and that like we're judgmental in that way. I don't want to be a part of that. Yeah, it's gonna get worse later
Yeah, way worse. Yeah, so break up with her boyfriend
With his fiance with her fiance. No, I think that he should probably just stand firm and man up and say, hey
This is the woman. I love that's what that's what it is. That's what yeah
I'm sorry. Tell your boyfriend to man up. Yeah. Defend you got to defend
Because if my mom let me tell you something right now when barack obama ran
The first time I told them to vote for obama. They were the republicans
They go vote for them a brock. Okay, like my parents
Yeah, I have my parents on lockdown if my parents ever said anything about kalilah
They would they know that they'll get it. Oh, yeah
Yeah, because you're not gonna tell me, but your parents are also very reasonable people. They know
They're not reasonable. I have a leash. I just train them. You have to you train them. You have to train korean parents
You do right? You have to yeah, because if you don't then they have weird ideas about life
Yeah, but then like the thing about like recovery though like in therapy though
Like my parents really want to be supportive of my life. You know now, but then they didn't want to go to therapy
And they they couldn't make up any more excuses. So they went to korea
Hey, what they were like
I was like trying to make a therapy appointment with them. Yeah, and they're like, okay. Okay, but we have to
Go to korea forever. We have to go to korea
And then so they like bought themselves like a month
done by going to korea. That is so fucking funny. They'll go that far. Yeah, they'll go to korea
We cannot wait to go to korea
Really last minute
Then though they just got back so now they have to go to therapy now. They can't go again
Yeah, but even when you were both getting sober before they never went they went and they really hated it
I'm sure they did yeah
Because they were like so freaked out by the process because they could like Korean people don't talk about their feelings
At all like even to the like there's bad like
There was like this suit. I remember the sky like
This family had gotten like a white carpet. This is a family like in our
We're not real related to them
But they were like family in our their class have coming over to America. They got a white carpet and one of the
Um dads killed himself shot himself and the Korean guy Korean guy the blood got all over the carpet
And they didn't do anything about it. They cleaned it as best they could but they just left the stain
They just kind of just left it. They don't like to talk and nobody ever talked about
What you know, and we just hop over this red like stain
Yeah, there would be this this blood stain. Yeah, and then you just yeah
Nobody would do anything
Yeah, they didn't even move the couch over to cover it. Oh my god
That's what it is. They just don't talk about problems. Don't like because when I was growing up
My parents didn't never my relatives thought I was dead
Yeah, they just would never talk about me because I was such a fuck up
You know, they don't want to they're not real in that way. Yeah confrontational in that way, you know
Like when I you know, I already talked about like when I told my dad that was molested at rehab. He laughed
Yeah, I mean because they just don't know how to they don't know how to deal with it. Yeah, they don't know how to
I have no tools and when so there's like, you know a therapist trying to get them to
Equip themselves with tools or to talk about even that process. They can't yeah
But why is that because it's cold. It's got obviously it's cultural, right? Yeah, it's cultural
But what are they rate in Korea? There's no therapy. No, there's there's um mental health. There's homes
Like I have a cousin who's continually tried to commit suicide
And then like her mother just moved into the hospital with her like it wasn't it was like
We're not gonna deal with this in therapy. Like I'm just gonna also be crazy too and try to pretend
I'm more crazy than you like it's like this
Crazy really crazy crazy thing the mom actually died just recently like the stress level of it
Was so intense and then my mom couldn't even really talk about her at the funeral. Like my mom said she looked very
That's kind of all they can say, you know, there's emotional pain, of course
But there's very they can deal with it by getting drunk and crying and then there's a sad Korean movies and these concepts
Of revenge
But not real like therapy
Why is revenge it because they made those series of movies about revenge like old boy and all the like
Other one. Mrs. Uh snow something or other
But like if there's a lot of revenge movies out of korea because there's no concept of
Getting through it with tools or therapy or forgiveness even no forgiveness only revenge
Wow, she's a skip forgiveness. Yeah, it's all it's all revenge based because that's the only way they can do to equalize
the situation
Speaking of korean movies margaret you have if you haven't already seen the wailing you have to oh, okay
Oh, it's
It's uh, it's set in rural korea and it's um, it's so good
Devils and shamans and zombies and just about everything everything but it's funny
It's real. No, it's not it. No, but you said it in the wrong. I love you an easy great movie
But the devils and zombies are interpretations, but it's played really dark and real
It's very real, right?
Very long movie a very it's a little too long, but it it's riveting every
Step of the way. Is it in um, is it in the cgv cinema? No, I can't get an item. Yeah. Oh good. It's on dvd now
Oh, good. I have to see it. Yeah, it got 98% on run tomatoes. It went to the can film festival
So it's uh, it's a good movie. Yeah, it's an indy, right? Yeah. That's an indy. Oh, it's not fox did it fuckface
Oh, that's that sound indy. Do you man? Yeah, because I was like can't
No, it cans doesn't have indy. They just put in good movies. It's a film festival
I have to see it. Very good. You know, but cance. Let's just stop. Sorry. No, there's indies that have gone there
I know some right, but it's not an indy festival. I was asking if it was indy. It's like can we move on to the next question?
He just says things that just like does it make any fucking sense indy?
I've asked how much it was. How much was a movie? What how much was it?
Uh millions of dollars because it's a fucking movie fuckface. Could it be an indy if it's under five? It looks expensive
Okay, then yeah, indy, if you ever say indy again in the next two weeks, right? I'm gonna rip your eyes out
Get cast in an indy film. All right. Um, so is there another email? Yeah, one other one one more
Hello, my name is Karina. I'm 26 years old. I met the super amazing guy of the summer. I think I'm in love
The last six months have been pretty awesome. I'm ready to make it official
However, he recently moved back to arizona for work the long distance relationship option was basically not an option in his book
Heartbreak emoji
We still talk every day and it feels like we're dating everyone thinks I should move on
But honestly, I feel like I'm not ready to give up yet. What should I do move on confess my love again? Please help
If that's a girl talking
I know what the guy's doing
Fucking
You know, I think the guy is like, you know, he's in a different city
He doesn't want if let me say something right now
If I get a job a tv show in atlanta and I have to live there part of the year
I'm not bringing up with kalayla because I want this to work
We've also been together three fucking years
You can't just you know up and leave me with four animals. I know but even they need food
But the point even if when I first met you then bitch
I love you. I mean, I can't even fuck you
You understand what I'm saying bodyguard. I mean she wants to get hit or something
I would never hit her Margaret. I know
I'm a you know cosmopolitan man
Okay, so you're working in atlanta finish the story and I would be like it like now if I wanted to like see other people
Yeah, I would say this
baby, um
Yeah, I just you know, I just think I want to concentrate on my job
The show so I just think that you know, you're not going to be like forthcoming and say hey like no
No, no, that's what you don't think I deserve the one truth
Therapy I'm not saying that I would do it. I'm just saying that that's what this guy's doing
This guy is going he doesn't like her
Yeah, I mean if if uh, you got to just move on
If it's if it's not like he's gonna make some effort to try to make it work as a long-distance relationship is not really
Yeah, you know and all he's securing is
Pussy for when he comes back to that's to you. That's all he's securing. He's not securing anything
He's not he doesn't want more than that. He's just making sure that you're still willing to fuck
Should he stumble onto your city into your city right in the future? Yeah, I think that's right
Sorry, Karina. She was also at the the live podcast
Oh, okay. Yeah, just just get out. Oh, I like her. I remember her. Yeah, get out Karina. All right. That's our questions
So do we have to plug you want to plug anything margo's? Um
Um, oh, uh, I don't know what uh, what am I doing? Oh, I'm going to hawaii with bill margo
Oh
You guys doing a show together. Yeah at new years. Oh my god. Are you going?
Um, we're doing a wahoo and Maui
So should be good. You know how much fun you're gonna have there. Yeah, I'm excited. I love I love doing shows there
It's so it's a great. We should go there together. Oh my god. That'd be great. That'd be great
I kind of here's what I want to throw out to you
Um, I want to try one. It is not a tour of just one show at some place. It could be hawaii
Where it's kind of a deal
Like an asian
Look, I want to try one with margaret. Me if ken wants to do it
Allie wall. Yeah. Yeah, and you know, steve burn. Yeah, joe coy because he's yeah and just do one night
Of a big thing huge. Yeah, that's a huge asian show. Yeah
I'm going to this next year work on that. Okay. Let's do it. Yeah. Yeah, that'd be fun
And I want to do a round of applause for margaret for your name
Thank you. I love you
I love you so much
and um, happy holidays anyone listening and um, we're still like three weeks
Doesn't matter
Happy holidays if anyone's listening and god willing your heart will go to the other lands
Yes
What does that mean? I just made it up. We make a lot of quotes up. I make up quotes
Yeah, good. Forgive yourself. Do you have any shows? What? Any shows? I'm in urvine
January 13th, January 13th. Michael Rosenbaum. Michael Rosenbaum. Oh, Michael. So Rosenbaum, you know, Michael Rosenbaum
He was in uh smallville. He played let's luther. He was our guest two weeks ago
And I think he's naturally funny and so I said you should do stand up. He's like where I go open for me
But he opened for harland over the weekend
Oh, good. Practice. He killed apparently. Oh, that's great. He'll be good then and now he's addicted
So he'll definitely be there in urvine
Bye
I miss you false on tigerbelly and instagram at tigerbelly on twitter at the tigerbelly and
Email us any questions like the folks from today at thetigerbellyatgmail.com anything else gliala?
Um, no, that's it. Thanks. Thank you guys for listening and we'll see you next week out. Bye guys
Hey
Prime members, you can listen to tigerbelly ad free on amazon music download the amazon music app today
Or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast
Before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey