TigerBelly - Episode 9: Why so sad, Bobo?

Episode Date: October 21, 2015

Bobo does the chicken dance. Gilbo Baggins digs himself an even deeper grave. We talk REM sleep, dead relationships, and how to be a good samaritan (hint: it's not by playing Bejeweled Blitz) Please write back Joanna.    Recorded October 19, 2015 Music by Bobby Lee   Instagram: @tigerbelly Twitter: @thetigerbellySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You're listening ad-free on Wondery Plus. Welcome to Tiger Belly. I'm Bobby Lee and this is Calyla and this is Bilbo Baggins. And welcome to another episode of Tiger Belly. And I wanted Calyla to start off the show because today I woke up in a deep, deep depression. And I'll tell you why. I watched CNN in the morning and No Feet was released from prison. Who's No Feet? What's his name? Oh, Oscar Pistorius. Pistorius. He got released because he murdered his wife and then he was spent a year in prison and now he's out. Well actually, he's still on house arrest.

Yeah, but apparently his grandfather or somebody wherever he's staying lives in a mansion. No, yeah, they live in the town of Pretoria where everyone is basically super rich or like that's like the Beverly Hills or like the Hamptons. You know what I want to do? If you make prosthetic limbs, right, you're a company, you can't allow him to get anymore. He has to walk on those stumps. Stumps, yeah. He's going to go hog wild. When that dude has feet, he goes hog wild. No, but he shot her without his stumps, right? Oh, no, no, no, not without his stumps, without his blades on. Holy shit.

Like he hobbled around, got the gun and then like kaboom just like shot it down. I'll be honest, when I first saw him though in the Olympics and stuff, I thought to myself, I wish almost for a second that I didn't have any feet. Because those legs look so cool. Are they made of titanium? Yeah, titanium. They're like hooks, not hooks. They're not hooks. They're not hooks, but whatever they bend. What sci-fi movie, there's a movie that has those, right? Like a robot that moves like that?

I don't know. I have no idea what you're talking about most of the time. Okay, it's true. Okay. Speaking of sci-fi, that boycott against Star Wars because there is a male black lead. I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck, man. All right, that's number one. I don't give a fuck if he's black or white, okay? There's always just some fucking like sad little legion of fucking racist fucks that live in the middle of America.

Trump supporters who are always going to have a say and they always do it in hordes on Twitter. That new trailer just now made me fucking cry and that's all I give a fuck about. And that kid, that kid, that black guy from London, the actor, he's a Jedi, right? He is amazing. Well, what have you seen him in? I just saw the trailer right now. His face is amazing. Yeah, but you've never seen him in anything, so that's fucking bullshit what you just did. All I know is that probably he's amazing because what you have to go through to even get that thing

as an unknown actor is I can't imagine what they needed to do. Because think about the casting so far, what who we know is in it, right? It's that guy from Ex Machina, both of them. Yeah. Brienne of Tarth, the big lady from Game of Thrones. Yeah, Oscar, what's his Oscar? Oscar Isaac. I love that dude, right?

That red-headed skinny dude that looks like he has HIV. I like him. The pale one. That guy from Ex Machina. Yeah, he's very good. Adam Driver from Girls? Adam Driver from Girls. Oh, I love him. Adam Driver from Girls.

That's very good. And so this black kid, Ry, probably went through 50,000, especially with that white girl. They probably went through screen test. You know what I mean? I can't imagine what you have to go through. Because I've auditioned for beef jerky commercials nine times before and not gotten them. Nine times. What was the very first commercial you did where you were like, fuck, I can do this for a living?

Well, I'll tell you, I don't know the first one, but I remember the first couple of them. One of them was really regretful because it was an El Pollo local commercial. And I had to do the chicken dance. It was one of those things where like, I'm on a bike, a cop's in a cop car, and everybody kind of wanders out of their car. And they start doing the chicken dance in the middle of the street. Oh, gross. I know, it's so gross. And I remember I lived in Silver Lake and across the street were these gangbanger kids, right?

Their parents are from M13. MS13. Whatever, MS13. La Mara Salvatrucha. Right. So I was nice to them, you know what I mean? Because I don't want to die. But also, but I remember those kids, I remember the kids used to go, hey, there he is.

And then they would do the chicken dance, right? And I would laugh like I would blush and laugh, right? But I also wanted to kill myself because it was so embarrassing. They would make fun of me. They weren't like, oh, there he is, the cool guy. They were like, no, there he is, the sellout. You know what I mean? What was the first very big check you received?

Was it the IBM one? IBM commercial, yeah. I did one IBM commercial and it saved me. This is before you became a comedian? No, I was a comedian already, but I wasn't getting a lot of spots in LA. And it was rough. I had no money. I was taking, I had no car.

Did you have a manager and representation? I had Abby and that's it. The same manager I have now. And she would help me out with the rent and stuff, but I literally had no money and I was on the precipice of quitting actually. And then I got that IBM commercial and for one day of work, they paid me $350,000. Oh, shit.

It was like this international campaign. And then I remember they flew me around the world and I got back into town and then everything was, I mean, it's always sad and depressing, just life in general. But I remember thinking to myself, I think I'm going to be okay for a while. And I was. And that's what his brother Steve said that as soon as he came back with that amount of money, he started shopping at like diesel and all these pretentious, like pretentious brand names. Well, I mean, dude, when you have no money,

and because we used to go to there's an El Pollo local actually right across the street also from where I lived. You know what I mean? Which is even more embarrassing because of the kids would do it next to the El Pollo local. El Pollo local is so good. Very good. But they used to have this breed. I don't know if they have it anymore called the BRC, which is being rice and cheese. Right.

And at the time they were like 70 cents or something. Right. But me and Kalisto, my roommate, but we also lived with my brother, a homeless, um, methodic named Sophie and a homeless man named Dave. And we also were like, they used to call my apartment the Dumpster. Skaters did because back then before Jack as we man would come over and spend the night. Oh, he knew him way before Jack. Oh, before Jack.

Yeah. This is in the nineties. Yeah. And we had like skaters from Baker skateboards because my roommate had a skate shop. You know what I mean, called juvie that was in Silver Lake. Right. But so we had all these people stay at our house and it was just like, there was always like, like that girl Sophie would, would never sleep and she would clean the house with

a toothbrush. You know what I mean? Because she was so methed out. It was a really, and then like Dave, there was no, that's the, that's the upside of being a methodic. They're just so just, she would only clean one corner of the room. One really clean corner. We had one clean corner.

Like a party house. No. Dave was another homeless guy. He used to try to rape her. Oh, man. Like physically, like sexually assault. Did you guys see this? No.

Yeah. Because we had nine people living in a two bedroom apartment. Jesus. You mean we like Dave, stop. Sorry. You know what I mean? Like it was really. Yeah.

It was really crazy. And then as soon as I got that check from IBM, there was an update because they were refurnishing the apartment. So somebody would move out and they would furnish it because they were trying to get all the dirty people out. Right. And as soon as I made some money, I got out of that. I took a nice apartment downstairs.

It was hard one floors and it was like exposed brick. It was really nice. And I just remembered that after that, everything was fine. Do you still keep in contact with friends that you made before you made any type of money? I mean, I run into, I mean, this, because some of them are doing okay. But, um, yeah, I mean, I don't, I don't talk to them on a daily basis, but like, not Calisto, because this guy that was roommates with, he, he, he owes me 10 grand because I invested in his skate store and he never paid me back.

And then his dad died from Mexico because he was in his spanica. And then he, he, he made like $250,000 from his dad, but he, he, so he had money. And then when he drank it all away because he's an alcohol, I mean, I think he's an alcoholic. I shouldn't say that somebody's an alcoholic, but, um, and he never paid me back. And I think, I mean, I saw him at the comedy store maybe a couple of years ago briefly, but you know, that relationship's dead. I feel like that's a very common theme with you.

I feel like everyone owes you 10 grand. I feel like he, because Bobby is a really generous guy and I'm telling you this now, like I've, I've been with him long enough to know that he will never say no, even when he knows he probably should, even if he knows it's probably beyond his means to do so that month. I mean, it's just one of those things where his friends will ask him one time, one time only. It's not a deliberation in his mind and it's immediately like, yes, whatever I can do.

And I feel like he gets fucked out, fucked out of ever getting that money back every time because of the fact that I, when I was poor, there were people that helped me, you know, like Carlos Mencia, I mean, people hate him or whatever, you know, but he got me a car when I had no money, you know, I totaled it, but yeah, he got me a car. I remember, like I said, my manager would pay my rent and I, that's why he won't leave his manager. Yeah. Here's, here's even a better story.

Like I remember one time when I first moved LA, I was living out of my truck at the parking lot at the comedy store, the lot, right? And I had no window. It was a completely busted open. And I remember being so hungry. Yeah. I had no money and I had dined to my name. And I remember Jimmy Schubert, who was, he was on Last Comic Standing, I think this year,

but back then, Jimmy Schubert came by the car. He goes, you're hungry, right? I go, yeah, he goes, let me take you to lunch. He took me to lunch. And so I never forgot that. It's like those moments when you're like fucking starving and especially like doing something like comedy and you're working your way into the business, it's so brutal, it's so lonely. So when you get any kind of like help from anybody, I remember that.

Now, you know, there are people that I've helped, they don't remember that I've made it, you know what I mean? That would never help me back, which is fine because I don't do it. I don't think initially to get something in the back. Or at least pay you back. Not help you back, but like pay you back. I know, but it's sort of principle Jesus. Yeah, but they won't.

Because 10 grand, that's, for me, that's a lot of money. That's a lot of money to me. That's a lot of money, yeah. I mean, that's, yeah, I mean, I'm not doing as well as I did on the road when I first started doing the road. You know, I mean, in the audiences, some of them are fine, you know what I mean? The business is fine. But some places markets, especially markets that don't play ever aren't that great at

first. So it's like, yeah, I mean, that would be nice, you know, but, you know, I'm not starving. Everything's fine. And I don't have any resentments. I have a theory as to why you might be depressed. Why? I think, um, because we're changing seasons, so we're going from October to November. Jesus Christ.

Okay. Never mind. I'm just saying, you know, you, you know, it's like Jenna and your hippie friends, they turn you on to like crystals and then like, I remember when Jessica, your friend came and gave you rocks. Oh, wow. She came over and just gave you rocks. Were you mad?

Well, are you looking at me like that? I was going to tell you, you might have seasonal affective disorder. That is not hippie shit. That's science. That's psychiatry. You dumb shit. Boom. What?

It's like, at what point does, does, I mean, everything that I present to you, every theory, every possibility, every amount of light I attempt to shed for you to maybe help you, you shoot down and you say it's hippie shit, but it's actually science, you motherfucker. Okay. Well, then to teach me, I'm sorry. I want to be, I want to be open to it. I'm just saying typically depressed people, there's a correlation, especially with your sleep cycle.

There's a correlation between sleep and depression. I'm just saying there's a good chance that you're probably in REM sleep a lot longer than you should be. REM sleep is when your eyes go, they turn and it's when you dream. It's basically when you dream. And there's a correlation with people, because you have four stages of sleep, one, which is sort of light, you're still arousal, two, sort of still arousal, three, and then four. Four is your deepest state of sleep.

Your blood pressure is down, your heart rate is down. That's when your body repairs itself, right? And you have a surge of human growth hormone and that's when your body physically repairs itself. And then you go into REM sleep. REM sleep is your, you're asleep, but your heart rate goes up, your blood pressure goes up. It's actually when you reconcile with your emotions.

And when you're in REM sleep, the part of your brain, your limbic system, that's responsible for your emotion actually lights up. So what I'm saying is you could be in REM sleep reconciling with memories and emotions and are being, and being woken up in the middle of that state. And that's what could be causing some type of depression. And there is science to prove that. So now we just have to attach. Why were you just smiling, motherfucker?

Can I just say Bobby smirked? I didn't smirk at all. Yeah, because he thinks everything I'm saying is hippie shit. I didn't smile. You smiled. Don't do this to me, please. How dare you? I get it.

All right. That's why I dare you to further prove my point piece of shit. How dare you? I feel like talking to you guys is going to make me dumber and dumber. There's no avenue for me to voice my thoughts without being called a hippie. Okay, but when I'm, you said this early, you said this earlier to me, okay? So what you're saying to me right now, what you said earlier was, is that I don't go into my third sleep.

I go right into four. There's a possibility. Look, every time you wake up, you always say, I'm depressed and I don't know why. You don't think it has anything to do with the fact that I'm going to Guam on Wednesday? I mean, look, you didn't tell me that earlier. I'm just trying to come up with a possibility. I'm going to Guam. Do you not want to?

What? It's not like I don't want to go. I have to go. It being on the road is rough. I mean, people seem to think that I used to think this. When I first started seeing Bobby, I used to think, well, fuck, like, what are you whining about? You have, you make good money.

You get to go on the road, make people laugh. And after you've done it for, I've been on the road with him for two years and I'm tired and I'm not the one who has to go up. Do you know what I mean? It's tiresome. You're doing, you know, you don't have a new set all the time. So even if you have the same set for six months, after the third time you've done that set, you're tired of doing it.

It's not just that though, it's, it's getting up, you know, doing press and then also like then your sleep schedule is all fucked up and those are some markets you don't do well. So you have to perform in front of really weird crowds and it's not, it's not easy, but I'm not complaining. I'm grateful for where I am, you know, but I just, Guam is fine. It's just the travel to get there and then, you know, it's fine. It's fine. But okay.

The impression though is maybe it's just, I'm just a depressing guy. Maybe you, that's what I'm saying, but there's people who are depressed have sleep disturbances. That's all I'm saying. And to further prove my point, antidepressants actually suppress your REM cycle in your sleep. I know you weren't following anything I said earlier so that absolutely makes no sense to you, but anybody who's following me, antidepressants suppress your REM cycle. If you stay in REM cycle too long, that's probably, that could be a reason why you're depressed.

Yeah. It's the, it's the point in time in your sleep when you reconcile with your emotions, with your memories, with your failures, with all these things that would naturally make you depressed anyways if you were awake thinking about them. Yeah, but you took a photo of me sleeping last night. Did you know? Oh my God. I got to show you this video, Gilbert.

He has his hands clasped like this as if like he's like a thinking scientist or a villain. Yeah. Yeah. Or a villain. Yeah. Like this. Yeah. Oh, the eyes rolled back?

Yeah. Just like this, hands perfectly clasped as if he was pondering on life. And soon after that, 30 minutes after that, I took that video. He wakes up and he says, I'm really depressed. So he was pondering. Even his position in his sleep indicated that he was thinking of something. Do you remember your dream? No.

I never remember that. That's another thing. And people who are depressed have poor recall of their REM cycle, of their dreams. They dream a lot, but have poor recall about it. Yeah. I mean, you have glimpses like I was wearing a cape or whatever, but I don't remember. Oh, wow. No.

Yeah. Or like there was a black dude in it or, you know what I mean? Whatever. You know what I mean? But I don't know exactly what it is. I mean, I know that there have been times where I've cried. When I cry in a dream that I wake up and I remember those and they're always involving Steve.

Yeah. I mean. Yeah. My brother. He was making fun of me the other day because I had a dream that Selena was still alive. That's silly. Remember that? The ghost of Selena.

Yeah. Okay. And then I was invited to like her private birthday party and that she was singing. She was singing her old classics like Beedie Beedie Bom Bom, but like holding her two year old. And then apparently it was sort of like one of those like nobody knows, but like the, you know, but a secret society of like Mexicans and I was like an honorary like person that got invited.

Yeah. I think the only thing we're doing that is having a dream with Selena's killer. What's her name? What's her name? I don't know. Consuela. No. It wasn't.

It was Jose Conceco. No. It was something very, very. But that lady though. What a fucking bitch. Did you hear a fat bitch? You hear that? She's still alive, oh, she's in prison.

She killed herself. Wait, she's in prison? She's not dead. Google it. Google it. Google it. Are you going to go visit her conjugal visit? No, no, no, but no, because let me tell you this right now.

You're going to write her a letter. No. What's her name again? I don't know. Just put Selena. Selena's killer. Jesus Gilbo. Jesus Gilbo.

Are you an engineer? Are you an engineer? Yeah, yeah. Filipino. Filipino. Oh my God. How dare you. Filipino should be quick on this.

Oh, she's alive. She's dead. You don't have to. Yolanda. Yolanda. Yolanda. Yolanda. If you're listening in hell, go fuck yourself, you fat bitch.

Thank you. Fucking kill Selena. Yeah. Because she was like, I'm going to do you a fan club. But she started like embezzling money. Embezzling, yeah. She did kill herself. How?

Found dead in jail. How do you kill yourself in prison? A lot of ways. You can find anything, any type of clothing to hang yourself. You could find contraband. You'll get contraband in there all the time, razor blades, any, there's so many ways to kill yourself. As a matter of fact, when a family member of mine went into a boot camp, because in

the Philippines they have for drug addicts, which is not legal here, they'll like basically take you against your will. They'll enter you in this rehab boot camp facility and they'll shave your head. The reason they shave your head is that girls can't use it to as like rope to kill themselves. Yeah. So you can use anything. Shoelaces. But you would think that more people would kill themselves in prison, no?

A lot of people do. That girl who was wrongly arrested recently killed herself in jail. And she, but she was wrongly arrested? She was wrongly arrested. Yeah. What's her name? Sandra Bland? Yeah.

Sandra Bland. Yeah. It's really sad. That's so sad. Wait, wait, wait, wait. So after she died, then they realized she didn't do it? Well, there's a video of her. It was just like a routine traffic stop.

You know, she, she, she got a little bit like confrontational, but not worth arresting. It was some fucking routine traffic. I forget what it was. Oh, she was black? Yeah, she was black. It was a huge deal. Yeah. And then so tell me what happened.

I don't know. I can't believe I don't know about this. The sheer fact that you don't know about Sandra Bland is making me like really upset. No, we're not doing that. So is it. What? Was that English? I guess that sounds half.

We're not doing that. So is it. Anyways, yes. It was wrong. Tell me what happened, lady? Well, she got arrested and she ended up dying in jail. Oh, so she could have been murdered. They don't know.

They don't know what they don't know. It, it, it was, it seemed like a suicide, but there's a lot of people who speculate otherwise. And given the, the tide of today, it wouldn't be a surprise if there was foul play involved. So I, to be honest with you, I, I, this was six months ago. So it's sort of like my, my memory is not, my memory of it is not so precise, but it was something to that effect. Right, Gilbert? Yep.

Anyways. When did that happen though? About six months ago, I think. Yeah. Recently. Well, you guys act as if I don't know about things. I know about Trayvon Martin. I know about Eric Cantor.

You do. You do. That's why I'm surprised that you don't know about this because you usually sell on top of this. Yeah. Yeah. Cause I really care about stuff like that. July 21st.

Oh wow. Even less than six months. Cause it's like as an Asian guy, like I never get pulled over. Like I've, I've like driven on the freeway, like playing Candy Crush. Ever. Never. Yeah. Yeah.

I've crashed into things like they won't pull me over. He crashed. And so I think that's reverse kind of racism almost in a way that you want to get pulled over. No, but it's like, I, I'm a criminal man. You should, I'm a bad driver. Give me a ticket so I can learn. He has never gotten a ticket since I've been with him.

Yeah. When was your last ticket? I don't remember, but I drive like shit in a Prius. That's so banged up. It's all banged up. Like you tell you, you know, he's a shitty driver. Yeah. Like I've driven on sidewalks.

You know what I mean? Like I don't, but I don't know why they don't pull me over. It is reverse racism. It kind of is. So I can only imagine on how actually how does that reverse racism at all? That doesn't make sense. It's just no racism. Exactly.

No. No racism. No racism. Sorry. Um, there's, um, so did you guys hear about that flight from Lisbon to Dublin? Where a man went like absolutely crazy on the flight and he started biting other people. He then got restrained by the flight crew and with some other people and then soon after that he died on the plane.

So now people, people are tripping out and thinking that this guy was like rabid and you know, it was like the what's what, well yeah, and now they think it's like the fucking beginning of the zombie apocalypse for real, but then some woman got detained because she had like 40 something like, like she had like an insane amount of metamphetamines that she, that was metam, what's a metamphetamine metamphetamine. What's that? Meth. Meth, methamphetamine.

Methamphetamine. You said metamphetamine. Methamphetamine. Methamphetamine. Yeah. Please both. I'm looking. Mepha.

Meth. Methamphetamine. Okay. Okay. That's it. Correct. So who had, who had the math? There was some lady who was detained separately, but I don't know if she had a relationship

with the guy who went, who ran amok and started biting people. So maybe somehow it, I don't know if he got ahold of it, drank it, maybe it was bath salts. I don't know what, but he went crazy and he died on the plane. Meth doesn't cause that because I've done meth before. Then bath salts because the same guy was taken, who ate that other guy in Florida was on bath salts. You said it wasn't bath salts. You said it was meth.

That's a woman who got detained separately on the flight. We don't know if it, if there was an association with a guy who went crazy. All I know is this is that if somebody was biting me on a plane, I'd kill them too. You wouldn't bite bath? No. You just kill them. I would kill them. And I would, and I'm sure every other, like everyone on the plane, like especially the

guys would kill them too. What if, what if it was just some dude, right? I was sitting next to you and I just like, like tapped you first and you were like, no, don't touch me. And you just, while you were asleep, I was nibbling on your elbows, but like, How hard though? Like cutely, like in a tickly way. Are you, are you, are you, are you, or are you a guy?

I'm a cute chick nibbling on your elbow. I would, I would probably giggle and go, excuse me, I'll go like, excuse me. But now, but if it was a guy doing that, I go, whoa, bro, what, what are you doing? You want to go to a bathroom? You want to like, hey, wait, hey, wait, what are you doing? You want to do a standing 69 in the bathroom? No, I wouldn't do that unless it was to Covney or Stewart, right? Who?

No, the, the, your boy. Oh yeah. The Korean guy. Yeah. What's his name? Tony Thornberg. Imagine if Tony Thornberg was on a plane with you and you just start, you woke up from your nap and you were sucking on your finger, like full blown sucking on your finger.

I would go, there's something else you can suck on. My other finger, my other finger. Oh. Okay. I know you thought it was my penis. I thought it was your penis. No. Okay.

Yeah. Yeah. And I don't know. Maybe my dick. Maybe. And maybe. Sorry, baby. Sorry.

So we found out who died. Oh, who? At the comedy store. Yeah. Who? What's his name there? You always do that. I forgot his name.

He's in 23. Yeah. I believe 23 year old kid named like Richard James or something. What? Was it black? Yeah. James Richard or something. And we don't know if it's a black guy.

Frank. Frank. Well, first of all, I fucking work there. Sorry. I mean, I fucking know. All right. So one of the dormant Frank told me he was, he was there that night. Oh, Frank.

You know, Frank, right? And Frank saw like he didn't see the shooting, but he was right around the corner when he heard the gunshots. And as he went around the corner, the guy was up against the glass of the door and he was not dead yet. So a lot of people witnessed his death. Okay, my question is that anyone tried to help him? What do you mean?

I mean, what, what is a comedian going to do? No, I'm saying like, was there anybody who was like, okay, the gunshot wound, right? Apply pressure and woo and apply CPR. Like was anyone there? No, I don't all nurses. Yeah. Like, did you, do you know what she did in Seattle? Right?

No, what happened? Okay. We're at, I'm playing part of our live in Seattle and then there's a restaurant. After the show, we went to the restaurant. We're sitting at the fucking, um, the bar eating food, right? That's great place. What's it called? Anyway, I forget things, but we're eating and all of a sudden we hear a guy go up.

What's her name? Sally. Sally. And I look over and when you see shit like that happening, I don't know what you do, but me, I pretend it's not happening. I do that too. I just go into like my own dreams. You guys are awful.

At least listen. Okay. So the next thing I know, Kolela is not even next to me anymore. She's at Sally. Right? And I look over. I swear to God. This is what I see.

Kolela punched Sally in the chest as hard as she can. Now I'm thinking that's it. We're going to prison. Like, I don't know what the fuck this bitch is doing, but she's fucking trying to kill Sally, but Sally's heart stopped and she was dying. Oh, wow. You know what I mean? And then, uh, Kolela went over there and did some sort of move.

What was that move? It wasn't a punch to the chest. If you say that, it wasn't a Heimlich, she wasn't choking. For starters, if you say that, I could get arrested. Why? Why? Because I can't fucking punch someone in the chest who was like, it looked to me like she was having some type of stroke.

We've talked about this on my other podcast. I hate repeating this story, but I know, but tell, tell everyone, tell everyone what I was doing when you're trying to help. Well, there I was. She put his headphones in. Worse. Oh my God. I'm touching your container.

I was there, her husband was freaking out. I tell somebody to call 911. It's chaos. Visibly, she's pale, she's sweating. She's like completely, like she's diaphoretic. She doesn't look like, she's not conscious. I check her heart. She has a pulse, a faint pulse, so like basically I can't do CPR, right?

And to me, it looked, I was thinking two things. Either she, her blood sugar was low. She was going through some type of like, she was hypoglycemic, but then I like, my quick, in my, in that quick moment that I had time to assess, she wasn't waking up, right? And the husband was like, she just ate, blah, blah, blah, so I was thinking, it can't be, she can't be hypoglycemic. So I gave her, it wasn't a fucking kick to the chest or a punch. I gave her a sternal rub to try to like arouse her because when you, when you knuckle the

chest area here, it's a, it's a noxious pain. It's a, it's a pain stimulus and it wakes a lot of people up. So I gave her a sternal rub and she woke up slowly and she was slurring her words. She was like, and I saw that it was asymmetrical when she was talking. So when the, by the time the paramedics came, I was like, look, I think she's having a stroke. What was I doing? Bobby doing the whole time. Bobby, you couldn't even see him.

All I saw was his iPad in front of his face, playing, bejeweled. Not even like. Not bejeweled. Bejeweled blitz. Blitz. The fast one. He wasn't even, he, he didn't want to acknowledge that he even knew me. I'll tell you why.

Was everyone else in the restaurant chaotic? It was chaos. Yes. No one. I mean, it was like. Can I tell you why? Please. Because I ain't filling out paperwork and I ain't going to answer questions because

yeah, I'm not, I have nothing to do with the situation. All right. That's the same reason why let me finish. That's the same reason why if I'm in an elevator and an old person gets on the elevator with me, I'll get out. Oh, in case something happens, because if she dies in the elevator, I have to fill out paperwork and ask an answer question. No, you don't.

Oh, so what you're saying is, is that I'm, listen, I'm in an elevator, okay. Old lady dies. Right. So what do you do? I'll call 911. Yes. Right. Hey, there's a old lady.

She died. Uh huh. Right. Can I leave? You can't leave. There you go. But there's no paperwork to be filled. I'm not staying.

I don't want to stay. The Good Samaritan Act protects me. I am a good person. I'm a good person. But the thing is, is this, they're going to go, the cops go, what happened? She got on and she clenching her chest. The cops aren't going to question you. The paramedics are going to take her away and that's it.

So I don't have to leave. I don't have to answer anything. No, because you're just a witness. They're not going to, there's no foul play involved. No one got stabbed. You're just there to keep, to watch her and to. How long does the ambulance come after I call them? Five minutes, depending on where they're at.

What's the most amount of time that it'll cut? Depends where you are. It could be 30. I don't have the time. You're an awful, awful person. That's what baby. This is what I, this is why I'm even more fearful of my own life. Why?

It's because I, I don't, you, I have a heart condition and you don't even know how to do CPR. You know how to play bejeweled blitz? He's going to play bejeweled blitz as I'm dying, as I'm like piecing out of the planet. I just feel like I, you know, if I'm not to learn CPR, all right, I'll teach you and I'll teach you. I don't know how to do it. Yeah.

Clearly. Cause you guys are just going to fucking pretend you're not even, that no one's dying. Bitch. When you were in fucking Philippines, right? And we were in the hotel room and you woke me up and you go, I'm having a unit called 911. We did that. We've dragged you into a fucking cab, right?

We went to the hospital, right? I ran and got you water because you said you needed water. I mean, I did everything I could. So I did. And in that situation, I will do everything I can because of the fact that I love you and I know you. Some random lady in Seattle, right at a restaurant, I don't know that person, but her husband is crying.

He's frantic. Yeah. But I will do work. If you weren't there, what the fuck am I going to do? You feel like you would make matters worse. Yes. I would probably, you know what I mean, if you had to do something, what would you do if you saw someone on the ground, like what would I do?

Yeah. To the person. I'm going to give my honest, my honest thing. Okay. I will probably rub their head. That's not such a bad thing. No, no, like, are you okay? Right.

And they're like, I can't breathe. Right. And I would just, right. Maybe at that point, I would rub their cheeks. Like what? Why are you rubbing my cheeks? Oh, no. What if I, and then I'll probably arch their back.

You're making it worse. Yeah. Bobby Lee, what are you doing? There we go. There we go. At that point, no, nothing. I'm being truthful. You know what?

It does happen sometimes where people think that they're being like good Samaritans and they do more harm than good, but it's like, it's like when you're sitting in the emergency exit row and on the plane, right? And they, and the stewardess says, will you be able to help us in case of an emergency? And everyone says, yes, no, you can't, I'm not going to do shit. First of all, I don't even know how to open that door. So when that plane is crashing, you have to read, you know, pull lever up, you know, counterclockwise.

I don't know what that direction is, right? And then it's also like, wait, what? You know, when you, you're in the exit aisle, you're in the exit, that door, you know what I mean? And then you got to bust open that window and then pull the thing. Yeah. I mean, you know, I don't know how to do that. And then I'm going to, every one of them are going to die.

We're all going to, if you, you see me in the emergency exit role on a plane, don't get on the plane because that thing goes down. We're all going to die. 200 people dead. Bobby Lee. You know, counterclockwise plus like, I never want to sit in the exit row again because the last two times that we were on it, our seats don't recline. Yeah.

They don't recline. Yeah. We were sliding, trying to like nap on each other and we were just sliding off of each other because we were completely upright. Let me ask you this question. Okay. I don't want to start a fight with you, baby. Can I just ask him a question?

Yeah. I, I, oh God, I already know what it's going to be about yesterday morning. We're in a San Francisco flying back to LA now, um, sometimes when I, you know, I go to the kiosk and I, you know, put on my thing, you know, my information and they, to get the ticket, it'll just automatically give me first class because I have such a, you know what I mean? I'm a points and miles and all that stuff, right? So then I got the ticket first and I got first class.

She didn't get it, right? And then you can tell that she is obviously upset and pissed off about it. So then I go, baby, you want my ticket and she's like, you know, fucking rage for mood. You know what I mean? It's like, I offered her the fucking thing, right? And then that's not good enough. She said, no, you sit there, you know, why does that put you in a bad mood? Um, let me just defend myself real quick.

I was in a rageful mood because his opener who was supposed to meet us downstairs at the hotel lobby at 545 in the morning because we were supposed to drive to the airport together. His opener is my responsibility, right? Didn't show up. He's nowhere to be found. We got to the airport. No, he was supposed to be at the hotel. Oh, yeah.

Downstairs. So we were supposed to fly back together to Los Angeles. We were supposed to meet at the hotel lobby at 545. I called. If you're not downstairs, I called his hotel room opening for me. Just FYI. If I say, meet me in the, the cat picks us up 545. If you're not there at 545, then you're going to have to find your way home.

That's his fear. That's how he deals with it. Me on the other hand, it's like, no, I want to walk up to his hotel room. I want to call him 50 million times. I know what it feels like to sleep through your alarm. So I'm thinking of, no, I want to do everything possible to wake him up right now and get him to the airport. Bobby's like, no, we're taking a cab.

Right now he's late. Leave him. It's his, it's his fault, right? And that's why I was in a rageful, rageful mood because I don't want this guy to come out of pocket because it means his opener. It's not, it's not somebody who has a lot of money to begin with. Now he probably has to get on a later flight. Who knows when he's going to get home?

Nick Youssef, one of my openers knows not to sleep because he knows I'll leave him. So he doesn't sleep just in case that doesn't happen. Anyways, to defend myself. That's why I was in a rageful mood. I couldn't give you shits Gilbert. Thank you so much for being on my side. Yeah, fuck you both. No, fuck you lady.

And look at me right now, right? You know, you and I are growing stronger. At first when I met you, I didn't like your fucking panface face. Okay? But now I'm really beginning to be fond of you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Fuck you Gilbert.

You're supposed to be my friend first. You fucking side with this motherfucker every single time now. You have death glare right now. I know. I do have death glare. What's wrong with you right now? And there's intent in this glare. I know.

You fucking podcast raps. You better get you get a piece of fuck out real quick. I had a dream about both of you. I'm going to RKO you. It was a dream. It's embarrassing. Tell me. It wasn't like a trio sex thing, right?

No, it was. Okay, thank God. It was very, it was sad. But I forgot what happened was so, you know, the whole you're like, all right, oh, you think you're gonna do well? You think you're gonna kill this fucking set? Oh, yeah. Gilbert's gonna play.

Oh, November. November. Just keep in mind, I re listened to it. I didn't say I was going to kill. I just said I was going to bomb, which is basically even worse. There's a difference. Let me look at it. You know, there's a difference in saying I know.

Look at my eyes right now. Gilbert in the last episode said that he was going to go up and do stand up for the first time. And then he he promised us that he wasn't going to bomb and open like, okay. So you're going to bomb in front of my crowd. And it's going to be, you know, I want to be like a little kid, you know, Christmas Eve, just can't wait to open the presents. It's going to be so joyful for me to see you fail.

Oh, I know. And I'm going to in. And when you get off, I'm going to go right up to you. I want to go in your fucking face. This was my dream. Island Gooke. This was my dream. What is it?

I went to Brea. It seemed way bigger in the dream. Yeah. Everyone was there. And then you came out and you gave me the worst intro ever. Yeah. And you looked at everyone and said, hey, he needs to bomb. So I go out there.

Yeah. I thought it was killing. People started giggling. And then everyone just started booing me. Yes. Yes. Yes. And I remember.

Yes. I finished the set. Pulled me aside like you're a coach or something, I don't know why I'm kneeling in a ball quarter. Yeah. You're patting my back and you're just like, you deserve that. Yeah. Yeah. And then Clado's like, yeah, you deserve that.

And then Russ Peter showed up in my gym and I woke up. That doesn't sound like a dream. That sounds like what's actually going to happen. That's going to actually happen. And I'm so excited. Yeah. What are you going to wear? Yeah.

I don't talk like that. Why? You panic about it? You're nervous about it right now? I've done shows in front of big people. But the fact that. Oh, sketch is completely different, baby. Yeah, baby.

Don't comment. I'm going to call you whatever I want. Let me tell you something. Okay, Amigo. Amigo. Ew. You're going to go up. Go back to baby.

Amigo is so gross. Baby, baby, baby. You're going to go up on stage, right? And what's going to happen? I'm going to tell you what's going to happen. All right. You're going to be backstage, right? And whoever is it?

Who's I'm saying? You know? I have probably Doc. All right, so Doc. Doc. Yeah, Doc's. Fuck. He's very funny.

Fuck. He's a black, older comedian. So it's like he always does well. So Doc's going to go up, right? And you're going to be backstage. You know you're next, right? And you're going to hear really big laps because he always does well, right? And all of a sudden he's got, oh, right.

So the next guy will come to the stage, right? It's his first time on stage. All right. Gilbert. What's your last name? Galan. What? Galan.

It's not even Asia though. Gilbert Galan, right? It's Galan. Yeah, Galan. Gilbert Galan, right? And what you're going to. What you're going to hear though is your heart beating, right? I know that feeling.

Just a bit. And then your mouth is, there's going to be no moisture. It's going to be completely dry. You're like, how come I'm so thirsty? Right? And then as soon as you go up, right, the lights are so bright, right? You're going to feel it like it's the sun, all right? And no one's laughing.

You're just going to hear people either silence or little murmurs. Okay. And then the third thing you're going to have is going to happen is your knees are going to start shaking, right? And as soon as the first word, you're going to say, you want to say hello, Brea, right? Oh God, that's what I was going to say. You're going to say this. Brea, hello.

Oh, fuck. In your head, you're like, that didn't come out the way I wanted to. Brea, hi. Yeah, yeah. I had this whole thing where I was going to high five people. Hi, Brea. That's not going to work. That's not going to work, right?

And then you're going to start bombing so bad. And all you're going to hear is not the audience laughing. You're going to hear me laughing in the very back. Yeah, yeah. We're going to be high-fiving each other in the back, right? And you're going to sweat and it's going to be the end. You're going to also lock eyes with a hot check and she's going to turn away from you. And that's going to make me feel so good.

It's going to be gleeful for me. We're going to feel so triumphant back there. Yeah. I can't wait. And we're going to tape it too. Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh, we're going to do that.

Once our website is up, we're downloading it in there. Yeah. It's going to be a material from Tiger Valley. I feel it's very cold right now. Yeah, yeah, good. Good. Because you fucking opened your mouth and you got all cocky, right? And I am going to fucking teach you life lessons.

That's right. Life lessons with Bobby Lee, all right? Order now. So everybody, anyone that lives in Orange County or lives in Brea, right? You have to go to that show. It's going to be the second show on Saturday night when I played the brand improv. It's in November. It's in November, right?

Come and just enjoy failure. If you want to see live failure, come to my show Saturday night, second show at the Brea Improv. It's going to be wonderful. Look at me right now, man. I know. It's going to be great. It's good.

Look, you are very nervous right now. Look at your face. I think it's the fear of being alone. I'm used to being with people. I know. That's now. Fear of being alone on stage? Yeah.

Because I've done shows for 1,200. Oh, listen. Sketch. Sketch is scary. And improv, yes. And improv is scary, right? But they're completely two different ballparks. You know why it's a different ballpark?

You're playing no character but yourself. Yeah. It's just you. You have nothing. You can't rely. You can't laugh at the fact that like, you know, when you do improv and they do a suggestion, right? And the two of you act like, we don't know.

We're trying, but we're committing, right? Yeah, people laugh at that. That does not work at all in stand up. At stand up, it's more of a jaded crowd. So they're like, let's hear your jokes. And the first one, if it's not funny. I don't do perm as much. I know.

You're going to swim in it. Hold on. I have a question. You're going to swim in it. Am I allowed to help him write his material? No. I can't do your material. No, no, no, no.

She's a good writer. No, fuck you. Not for me, though. Yes. Hold on, motherfucker. You're Filipino. Oh my God, I forgot you're Filipino. I would be a great writer for you.

Yeah. So I'm not allowed to help him. You have to write your jokes yourself. Poor Dodon Gilbert, poor Gigi boy, does not get help from Ate. I can't believe there's a black host. Why? Because all my stuff is urban. No, you said urban?

I do urban. I try to do urban. I can't do urban. No, he's worse than an urban comic doc. Because doc is not one. Doc is a very likeable. White people like him. Yeah, they love him.

He's going to crush. And Brea is predominantly white. So good luck with your urban shit. So I can't even go with likeable because the guy before me is already the most likeable person. Cute. I can't even play him well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I ask for one piece of advice?

Yeah, go ahead. If you could give me one piece of advice. Go ahead. Ask me. What's one advice you would give me for going on stage there? Well, I have a million of things I could say. All right. So what do you want me to?

Oh, here's one thing that, you know. Okay. Story or no story? The thing is this, no, it's got to be way more basic than that. You're telling me I have to go with just straight up. No, you have to make decisions like this. Am I going to be a talking head? Or am I going to walk around the stage?

Because if you want to walk around the stage, you have to take the mic off of the mic stand, put the mic stand in back of you and walk. Yeah. Or if you're going to be a talking head, you just keep it there, right? And you talk. So you have to make decisions like that, right? But it doesn't matter what you choose to do because you're going to black out because of the fear.

Yeah, I think I see that. Yeah, yeah. No matter what I'd say, it's going to be awful. You could just. I believed in myself so much when I made that statement. You could just start going to eight open mics today. But I thought this whole project was I wasn't being, I wasn't going to be allowed to go to any open.

Okay. This has to be my first, right? That the whole. No, even if he does open mic, right? It's different. It's such a, it's so different because. It's like three people versus 600 people. Oh, I'm allowed to do open mics before this.

Yeah, but that's not going to help you. Oh, I'm way more confident now. I'm going to kill the show. Oh, gross. He took it there. He took your finger. I've never noticed that before. It's a, it's a benign tumor.

How long has it been there? I thought it was three. It almost looks like a bone spur. Touch it first. I don't, I'm not touching it. It's like a, it's like a calcification. And it's not connected to my skin. Can you get it removed?

Yeah, but I just, I just got pulled off my parents' health insurance and I can't do it. So he's got a knuckle on a knuckle. How much is that going to cost to get it removed? Does it bother you spiritually, babe? I can't look at it anymore. How much will that. Your face is so pissed off.

How much knuckle. I just, I can't believe I haven't seen that before. It looks like, it looks like a marble on top of his most distal joint. I fucking hate it. And his middle finger. I don't have to do this. I just go, oh, normal. Oh, any girl that has that in her vagina is got issues.

It's like a, it's like an extra. Justin, do you want to feel it? No, I don't want to fast forward. I got to know. Put it away Gilbert. Put it away. Put it away. Put it away.

Put it away. Put it away. I'm, we never got, we promised listeners that we would get into the story about your falling out with Vince Vaughn. Did you want to talk about it this episode or the next? I can talk about it now. So Vince Vaughn used to hang out at the comedy store and he was friends. He's still friends with Ahmed Ahmed and he's friends with other comics.

and him and I hit it off we were friends and you know we hung out you know I would end up at his house I remember bringing Patty or that Korean girl that used to see David Cho well you know I was seeing her at the time so I brought her to her house I remember my brother too and then you know I also was using right so I would take pills you know and party at his house whatever so one night he says hey I want to do a tour because I want to try stand up so he he invited me Dane Cook and Ahmed to do New Orleans because his friend had a club there so we packed out the room we went to New Orleans and one night I

don't give a shit because that that really this relationship is so dead hold on maybe we we want to just not tell that part about it because that's an accusation right all right fine good catch good catch baby so anyway something happened in New Orleans severe misunderstanding that that you know I mean that I shouldn't have said anything but I came back into LA and I was having lunch with Laban Phideas who's a skateboarder and Andy Dick okay and I'm telling them this crazy story that happened in New Orleans well but Vince's sister was sitting in back of me at the restaurant which I had never met Victoria

before I didn't know and Vince's ex-girlfriend was sitting he had they were having lunch together right and I was so loud telling the story that she told Vince that I said said that about him which was not a great story you know I mean but it wasn't I know I don't know I regardless what and he called me and he said you're done and then just like that just like that and then like I remember I was at a party or something and he came by and he he was smoking a cigarette and he threw the ashes in his face and then I wrote a letter to him I also apologized to Victoria and none of that helped you know and I've been out

with him ever since and that's fine right because I really liked the guy and I think that he's fucking hilarious and you know I you know I say I miss him but it's like you know I just was cut out you know yeah I was looking at all the photos that that were that were in his chest right and it's sad it's sad I don't know the extent of your friendship you know I don't know photos don't say so much right but it's like look it was obvious through those photos that this was somebody who was a part of his life and for it to end so abruptly and in such a bad way it's it's it's sad but at the same time given I know the full

story and I know everything that went down it's a little bit it's excessive on I mean it's not excessive it's like well it cost me also cost me work right so when Steve Byrne was on Sullivan sons right you know Vince produced it with Peter Billingsley you know who Peter Billings is you ever see the Christmas story yeah he was a kid oh geez but now Peter Billingsley is a producer you produce Iron Man but it's all a part of that whole Genfavoro Vincvon family right so anyway so when Sullivan sons I remember Steve Byrne calling me saying listen I have a storyline that I want to use you in season two of Sullivan sons

and we talked about it thoroughly I was very excited about it and then one day he just calls me and says you're not doing it Ken is Ken Jeong and I go why I mean because we've been talking about this for like six months and he blamed it on the network Steve Byrne did but I knew what it really was you know it's right so I feel like if he were to get even catch wind of what you're saying right now he would completely number one deny that you were friends say that you were talentless and even make say something like absolutely meaner and say I had nothing to do with me he's just a fucking talentless monkey and I

feel like is he that type of guy I don't know I don't know I don't think so no I think he's very supportive of his friends he helps his friends a lot he just hated comedy and I don't think that he thinks that I'm not funny I think that he thinks that I'm a legitimate comedian I just don't think that he wants me in his life and that's fine and he has every right to do that and I'm I'm fine with it too I've accepted it I'm trying to put myself in in that situation if I overheard somebody talking badly if I were in a diner say for instance and if I heard someone talking badly about my sister I I would probably react the same

way exactly and so I don't blame them I fucked up and you know what at the end of the day that was one of the catalysts of me getting sober because that happened a month and a half before I got sober and then I remember going to a coffee shop with my friend Lavin Fadias and then Lavin the skateboarder that I told the story to and then he said you dude I can't hang out with you anymore because of the drug use and I remember Paulie Shore calling me because of the drug use and then along with this Vince Vaughn situation because he hated me I remember going I've had enough so it was like if if that didn't happen I don't

know I think I would have probably used for another year or two you know me but you know it was a real devastating thing you know and you know it's I have almost 14 years of sobriety that's how long ago that happened damn you know he still won't you bumped into him oh yeah a couple times yeah still nothing and it's because Steve Byrne and I are very good friends and he's very good friends with Vince and Steve I remember they went to Costa Rica or something together and Steve talked to Vince about me saying you know he's he's got see been sober for a long time and he just wouldn't have it so that's fine I'm fine over it's a

dead relationship it always will be I think that he's a super talented guy I really do and I think I'm a huge fan of his and I want him to do great things and I'm fine with that you know I really am yeah I mean you were a drugged out a 20 something who was I'm guessing just completely full retard yeah and you know what like you there are consequences to that and it you know all his hatred you know led you to a path of sobriety so maybe that's not only that it's like if you look at my life now it's like his hatred left you know me and me with you because who knows what had happened like everything that happened before this

moment right led up to this moment right and if any of that changed right I wouldn't be in this situation so you know for me I'm grateful that happened because you know you're in my life and we're doing a podcast in our tiny little room yeah and this is Gigi boy this is what it's supposed to be and this is what life is supposed to be and Gigi boy is gonna bomb in Brea November it's gonna be great you guys want to do the MMA moment or what I don't have an MMA minute although we wanted to talk about this kid named Sage Northcutt show Bobby a picture first and he can I'm not gonna say anything so you picture you just give

your thoughts brand new UFC prospect 19 years old from Texas whoo what is he he's basically the Paige Vansant version oh my is he good fighter he's 19 he's very good but super Christian I want to thank Dana White for the opportunity I like your elbows Kenny Florian like and his Instagram is going to drive you crazy yeah but let me say something to you right now you'd have sex with him no what how dare you I'm not gay anyway um I fuck him no I think that he him him and Paige Vansant are like out of the same cloth is that term yeah cloth yeah yeah they they're just uber white attractive almost they don't look real

they almost look like they're dolls he's like an Abercrombie model yeah I'll do that a fighter is that good looking a lot of other fighters I don't think he's that good looking I just think that he's like a doll you know yeah I don't find him he's definitely not my type because I want to Google him super sage sage Northcutt wait on Instagram is that say state stage on the Internet he does duck lips and selfies and I think that's basically the number one no no in my book if you're ages his name SAGE he's not he's Northcutt N-O-R-T-H-C-U-T-T he's not a like a douche or bro he's actually a very nice kid he's just not broken

which makes him more unlike that's not him right fifty 39 followers that's probably a fake account yes 70,000 he had 3,000 before the UFC girls went again in his dick they do oh yeah 19 Abercrombie model Jesus Christ sage I can't find him he's a forget it I'll show you pictures after I want to follow him he has a Christian based on fan base too yeah because he's you know he hasn't had sex yet oh he's oh my god he's one of those is he a Jonas brother Oh there he is can I just ask you something about you just follow him yeah I'm follow him right now no I gotta follow him he's gonna be like Bobby Bobby Lee

I'm so thankful why because you're gonna look at one look at just one selfie it's just Christian yeah let me look maybe we should recruit him to listen to our podcast and maybe you know we are a Christian based podcast we are a podcast but I don't want to be jealous or I don't want I don't act weird right yeah but how the fuck are all these people like you know now on Instagram they're like verified but the comics can't get verified it's so weird that comics are the last people to get verified yeah you can't get verified no I'm not verified in Instagram that's fine I don't need to be but he's only been

around for like a year he's been around for three days I know it's a little yeah the lia is now verified yeah but he has like half a million followers just get up to his level babe yeah but stay Sage Northcott has 70 something follow yeah I know you know I don't want to watch his fucking highlights right now Bobby how like ridiculous this kid is yeah very agile he is he's basically like a gymnast fighter like he does parkour probably oh he's pretty good huh wow he's strong wow he's more known for his celebrations yeah he does like a backflip

stuff oh really mm-hmm I'm so disappointed with myself that I don't have an MMA minute and the Dublin fights are this weekend right should I unfollow him now unfollow him please that's weird okay I had this thing I have a suggestion you know how before people blow up yeah there they they read all their comments so you wanna you JJ she only a give or take gets about 40 to 50 comments like when I get when I read every single one of my comments every single one of my reviews because it's like I'm nobody I'm nobody right and I think you wanna is still relatively unknown to the public or in

to masses that I think you can write her sweetie and I think she will notice and just say I love you you wanna I've done it before I think no you did that to Lord and it didn't work but Lord already had like a million followers because he saw Lord had a little Asian boyfriend oh she and then he he he wrote her on Instagram we were in a diner together I was like just right I love you and then she didn't reply so but I think you wanna will just write right now and one of her pictures like I love you you're my favorite fighter okay okay all right and we'll see if she replies hopefully she will I don't think she will oh my god

how happy would you be if she did though yeah but I already told Joe Rogan that I want to meet with her so that he's gonna work on it but Joe's not gonna remember that she's not verified either watch this hey everyone fuck is she not verified and that other guy is I know isn't that depressing so right I love you I love you know when one of her single photos we're gonna make this happen everyone tweet Joe Rogan asking to remind him that Bobby Lee has to meet no don't do that don't do that don't don't do that we tracked retracted we don't ever do that retract because I don't want Joe to think alright so

I think he's obsessed but he's really I love you I love you Yohana I love you Yohana spell her name right sweetie Yohana spell it right okay joe and okay you're my favorite fighter in the world that's it you're my you are my favorite fighter yeah and she's gonna be like who is this little fucking chinky dumpling well we also have some a rapid-fire questions rapid-fire oh you know where I'm going this Saturday where to a space party what does that mean I know it's so like nerdy but it's a space celebration with Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson is gonna be there and then the guy Andy Weir who wrote the

Martian it's like the ultimate nerds that's awesome I know but I I I want to take a selfie with Neil do you think he will with me yeah no because he's like he has like 4.4 let's talk about the cosmos I love the cosmos anyway guys thanks for listening to another we're not done yet we have questions we have questions thank you ready go ahead a helpful boss Bobby Kleiler question from Twitter this is from Charma Senes at Tiger Belly hashtag Tiger Belly mr. Bobby Lee my naked and famous crotch blew out need a new pair any remit any recommendations on other brands jeans oh jeans yeah I would go with really thick

denim and the one that I would go with is strike gold what about your iron hearts or iron hearts there you go either one and either company they're okinawa denim at your young blood on Twitter fucking check up the ass you notice poop on the cock do tell her or just stay quiet I don't do that world that's not a part yeah stay away from that's not part of my world poop on the cock poop on the cock sounds like an English dish give it up for the band poop on the cock one more and our final one take your time with this one okay South Korea vs. Philippines World War 3 who takes it oh South Korea 100 South

Korea literate so two reasons why and then one celebrity to represent as the leader okay let me just tell you one thing right now South Korea has already taken over the Philippines if you go to my islands of Cebu it's literally 40% Koreans Koreans have quite literally without actually saying they've imperialized have imperialized the Philippines they all open stores there and it's one thing to I grew up with some Koreans which were great just to argue for the Philippines no but I can't we're a third-world country Korea is a first-world country how is that even a comparison that's right our military

doesn't even compare South Korea is on par with their military okay those two divers from the Philippines okay okay you know those two divers right get up don't forget if that happened to Korea they would be dead that's probably true they as soon as they got back to Korea they'd be executed why are your people in my country bro bitch I don't know anyway thanks for listening guys I love you that was a great one I really loved it guys follow us on Instagram Tiger Belly and on Twitter at the Tiger Belly subscribe on our iTunes we do read every single one of your reviews and it it melts my little deranged little heart

and leave us a review obviously Bobby is going to be at the Sheraton Laguna Guam this weekend October 23rd and a 24th at the American Comedy Company in San Diego November 5th through the 7th and at Yuck Yuck's in Vancouver November 13th through the 14th what a what have I left out Gilbert everyone to eat Dana White to let Khalilah fight in the UFC 115 pounder she would destroy all the girls except you I there is absolutely and I would get annihilated even by the Adam Waits even if I fought at 105 I couldn't last you could fight Karate Hottie 10 oh Michelle Waterson yeah not not even for 10 seconds would I last

maybe if it went to the ground and maybe if I got lucky and she gave me her neck maybe I could quickly pull like a guillotine but other than that no fucking wake up I would lights out comatose good night forever Khalilah no more Tiger Belly podcast so that being said do not tweet Dana White edge of silver that Khalilah needs to be in the UFC all right guys we'll see you next week bye hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today or you can listen ad-free with Wondry plus

in Apple podcast before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry.com slash survey