TigerBelly - The Most Disrespectful Person Ever w/ Zavier Cummings
Episode Date: March 29, 2023Bobby goes to Celebrity Zoo. Zavier knows Princess Layla. Khalyla has a horn sound. We talk 39 weeks of invisalign, catching a muscle, sensitive friends, and Mel Pre-Gibson.Discover your pote...ntial with BetterHelp. Visit www.betterhelp.com/belly to get 10% off your first month.www.tigerbellylive.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon music download the app today
Hey, I'm Mike Corey the host of Wanderers against the odds in our next season three friends backcountry skiing in Alaska
disturb a hibernating bear and
She attacks the skiers must wait for help to arrive before one of them succumbs to his injuries
Listen to against the odds on Amazon music or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm not saying it right or wrong
Wow, I'm saying it
You guys really like these microphones. Yeah, I like to hold it. You guys don't like it on stands. Yeah, I'm aware traveling
Well, I mean they're doing that. I mean listen, don't even get me started there
I like it held in lock locked into do you wanna stand? No, no, no, this is fine because I I could call I was gonna snap
Yeah, I feel like she's gonna snap
Yeah, yeah, yeah, so the only reason I would snap is because I just really want you to be a team player
I'm being a team player. That's why I'm saying that the best player energy right now
I know because I know I'm getting there though. I want to know I can I ask you a real question
Yeah, what why the mood today? I
I I'll talk the mood the mood is
The mood is full tantrum. No, it's not I'm not being a tantrum. You want to see tantrum? Yeah, I'm not gonna do it
That's a lot of energy not while I'm on the bed. Yeah, yeah, yeah, number there's two things
Okay, number one. I fucking you know walked here from the hotel, which is not that far
But the you know the Google thing. Yeah, it wouldn't tell me exactly where the entrance was so I did a couple of circles
That's it
I went to Golden Goose and I go you know what maybe that's a sign because I only brought one pair of shoes
I walk in there. They don't have sliders
Slides yeah, sliders are the meal. Mm-hmm. Oh, it's not like those are delicious though
What's not like white castle Kobe slider? No, no, I didn't have slides
So I put me in a bad mood and then I when I called George was like where is it?
I didn't know the circle. It's fine and the bed is fine because I'll tell you why we have a nice guest here
I love this guy right here. Hi, Xavier. Oh my god. Why?
Yeah, yeah, and sorry about my energy man, but um, oh, no, so let's start. Let's go for real
Let's let me get up. Let's do a hum, maybe
Mm-hmm
Uh-huh, what do you mean? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. What do you mean? Uh-huh. Is that what he said? Let's do uh-huh
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Okay. That's what I thought you were doing. What'd you think it was?
I was like, let's do a hum. You think that's the way we say fuck
No, no, no, but this is the most people I've ever had in a room ever
Oh, I don't know if this I don't know if you guys are used to this kind of stuff
But this is for sure one, two, three, four, five. Yeah
Yeah, Xavier. Yes. Um, what side of the bed do you sleep on?
Your side on my right. Oh
Right. So you this is where yeah, this is where I sleep, right?
Yeah, but you're on the right side. I'm usually on the left right. So if you were you and I were a gay couple
Mm-hmm. We would fight over this
Yeah, yeah, because I can't sleep on the left side. Why not? I have to be on my after be laying on my right side
Yeah, why no, I don't I don't know I've tried I tried laying on the left. I'm the same way see I can't I can't sleep on that side
Well, what happens? What happens? Yeah, I have a real reasoning as to why I need to sleep on the left side. Why? Because I
Am usually a left side sleeper. So basically my when I'm breathing my hot morning breath
It goes not towards my partner, but the other way. Oh
And this is my preferred side. So if I'm sleeping on my right and breathing to my partner
It's probably only a few moments in the night that I'm doing that but 90% of the time I'm breathing my morning breath this way
Well, okay, so you guys are my right. I think that's why okay. I'm right handed
I'm a mouth breather. So same same a client. Do you guys sleep with your mouth open? It's hard to do
No, I have to if I don't I'll die because I have nasal collapse
So it's like it did like this like if you see me my my natural way is to sleep with my mouth closed
But then like Bobby has to do this in the middle of the night. He has to
Like I'll be up or else. I'll die. Oh shit. Can I just say something? Yes, we're all we're all mouth breathers
Okay, we don't need oxygen. We all need oxygen. Oh, yes. Yes. I mean you said it in a cocky way
Oh, no, I'm a mouth breather
No, no, I I am a mom evolved or some shit like you have some sort of power. We're all mouth breathers
Yeah, I'm a mouth breather. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know that people tape like George Kimmel?
He tapes his mouth at night so that you become a nose breather because that's supposed to be better for you
What do you tape your mouth shut? No, what do you do then during the day? That's what we all want
You reverse the fucking process
Oh wait, you you tape your mouth. Yeah. Yeah. Oh shit. We're talking about somebody not in the room
What's his last name Kimmel oh wow
Yeah, but it you don't like I don't know you can't if you don't
Pick it up quick. You miss it. You know what I mean? What was that justification?
Yeah, long story short. No because why 70%
70% if you sleep if you breathe with your mouth at night, yeah, your chances of cardiac arrest increased 70%
That is correct. I'm reading a freaking book called breathe or breath, right?
Okay, I literally I literally wish you never told me that the but now he's gonna worry about it
Yeah, now it's another thing to worry about gorilla tape. I'm telling you
Tape it. Yeah, there's no way I can't breathe. Yeah
There's no way I can't breathe. There's no way. It's hard. I have so many boogers and stuff. I think what it is. Yeah
Go ahead. No, what?
No, I don't I I mean I just and then I just blow it out. Yeah, yeah
You know more of this. I don't need any more fears. All right, 70% whatever man
I'll if I die I die, but I'm fucking gonna breathe through my mouth. Okay. No me too
Yeah, yeah, but you don't breathe with your mouth when you sleep Bobby. That's good. You're you're you stay shut like this
You're so cute and heavenly and angelic. Oh
Wait, so you're good. Yeah. Wow. He's good. I'm like a moon calf
What's the moon cat brah the snack? No? Oh?
Why there's a snack called the moon
No, the moon pie my bad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I just I just bro
I just take one word. Hey, yeah. Yeah, do you you're a good one, man?
You really you know because I think about I think about our last conversations and stuff so so fun
And it was very fun and I just kind of go how does it even fucking survive man?
You mean there's a lot of things you threads what by a thread by
Survive by a thread. No, but not literally. I just meaning like, you know, I just I love the innocence
people loved you on the last time yeah last tiger belly by the way, but but
Um, what did your friends think of Bobby?
Honestly, honestly, I want the honest truth. They
They said that you were the most disrespectful person that they have ever seen which is interesting to me
Because I liked it
Disrespectful in one way
A tacky you you're real a tacky attack mode condescending. Yeah attack mode attack mode. Yeah, you're like, uh,
You know, I apologize fighter to to them not me
You know what I
Want your whole family and all your friends
That's my golden life now is for them to like me. No, yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna try I'm gonna try I've been trying to do
That you can't win or no, I know, but you know what I can though is soften it
Mmm, right because the blows. So let me ask you something this right. They don't like me
They're trying to figure it out
So political no, no, no, so that pause right that pause right there was what I called an eternity I
Lived a whole lifetime in that little pause. Ah, that was the most painful pause. I've ever heard of my life. Okay. Yeah
So basically, they don't like me. So it's okay. It's fine. Not everyone's gonna like not my immediate family
They're good. No, I'll you're out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I want the cool kids to like max one of them
No, no, no max Holloway. Yeah, if you know because maybe you pissed max off, too
No, I did that you did have something to say about max the last time. Oh, yeah
So maybe that's why he's not doing what I say your Vulcan Aussie would beat him. Yeah, I never said that
I remember when you read my mind. I never said that
I'm a huge. I think max Holloway is the greatest striker
Boxer that the MMA world has ever seen. I agree. He's a machine clip that and send it to Max K. Yeah
No, I really believe that and I think that
He's one of my top three of all time. Mm-hmm of all time. I think that
Um that that match he did with Kater Kater Kater. Yeah, right. Yeah was just a demonstration of pure
Talent and God-given skill. I mean, it's just what a work. What what a great job. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah, Max doesn't hate you
Yeah, but your other your other friends to be and
But what they were saying is because I was making fun of you. Yeah, but
That but I was telling the truth
No, hey subjective it's subjective truth, right? No, no, it's subjective truth. It's subjective truth, right?
Pete look, I mean it but there's there's sensitive, right?
Okay. Yeah. Oh, yeah. All right. So let me talk about that sensitivity. Okay. Okay. Yeah
Guess who the most sensitive person in this room is you I am
I'm the most sensitive person in this room and the reason I attack and the reason why I I get in front of it
Mm-hmm. It's because I don't want to get hurt. Okay. Okay, but at the end of the day if you called me and said
But baby, I go who is this who's who you're imitated wait him. Oh, oh
Bobby, yeah, I okay
Name a couple times but baby, but big boy
Who is this?
There we go mings
Oh, what born born kawaii raise where China
Anyway, if you needed something I would be there for you. So that's all I appreciate that
I want to say but just on this in this podcasting medium
I I attack and I you know what I've been watching myself lately and I go, you know, I don't like the way I do it
You know, I've seen a couple of clips where I'm like, I'm a little too aggressive and you know what I'm learning from you
So this podcast no attack
I'll love no. Yeah guy. It's it's whatever it's got. You're not retarded. I
You're not I really since you've said that I was really pondering at home
Really, why were you questioning yourself? I I went back into my elementary coloring books and I said you really couldn't draw on the lines
I was like, am I really yeah, you know, if there's something mm-hmm, so
And also I think you're very handsome
You know, you know what Bobby? I can say this with
pure confidence
each week that passes by
This this teeth that you see just get straighter and
Straighter and could you have after a lot of is a lie? Oh after you bought visa line
Yeah, I'm thirty nine weeks in brother. It looks great. You know, that's what I've been noticing about you
Yeah, yeah, you know, it's done. It's horse-like. Yeah, that's why yeah
Yeah, no somebody tried to book me for um, it's a they thought I thought I was trying to like impersonate frickin queen and
Asked if I could like perform. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Are you I don't even know his songs
Oh, so I just look like him. Oh, did I make fun of you about that last time? I called you Freddie Mercury. Yeah
Yeah, yeah, that was what yeah, and he didn't know what it was, you know, and that's what's endearing about you though
You know, let me ask you some some
Some trivia if you if I may oh hundred percent with music, right? Yeah, let's let's go sci-fi. Oh, yes
My favorite topic, honestly, really? Yeah. Oh, okay. Is that kid? What's a ton ton? Mm-hmm? Whoa?
Is that not a Filipino dessert
No, that's not like it
That's all in the sci-fi world. Okay, what's it sound sweet, but I don't know. Okay, don't look at me
I don't know either. You know what time time I want to say it's like a Star Wars thing. Very good. Stay with that
Stay with that. Very good. You're right being go. Yeah. Yeah, you can describe it if you don't
That's it. I stop at Star Wars. All right. I got it. Go ahead the big, um
Machine in Star Wars
There's so many machines in Star Wars
Machine machine
What do you mean? I I never watched Star Wars. You think they had like a sewing machine? Yeah singer a singer. No, so you know what?
What is it? What are you googling?
Oh a tauntaan if it's a machine and big
Luke Luke rode this tell you Luke rode this in the snow on the planet, huh? Oh, it looks like the never-ending story guy
Hi, come on full circle. No, it's not full circle. It actually isn't the story
Sorry, yeah, yeah minus that his horns
Yeah, and also it doesn't fly. Okay. It doesn't so it lives in snow. Okay. Oh, yeah
Oh, damn. Yeah. Yeah, you never saw any of the Star Wars. No
But insane am I missing out don't you think it's it's great. It's so great. I love it. What do you think it's about Star Wars?
Yeah, what do you think it is? Yeah, that's very good
It's what you think Star Wars is what it has to be about. Yeah. Yeah
Intergalactic war exactly. Yeah, we're right. So
With what are you doing? Are you joking for real? What do you mean? Is it about that?
Well, dude, it's not about like you know star. It's not about soccer. Okay. Yeah
Yeah, I mean you took the it's obvious star wars. Yeah war going on
Okay, so what I'm gonna ask you is is do you know some of the characters in your mind already?
Um pop culture Luke. Right. So just tell me the story then just try to tell me what you think happens
I mean, you got to have a antagonist. So so start with Luke. He's Luke. What is he?
Um, is he the hero of the antagonist? He's the hero. Exactly. He's the hero. Tell me about him prince
So he goes out and he is doing his thing. You know what I mean?
He's doing his thing. Of course. Of course. I get it. Trying to try to make it trying to make it. Yeah. Yeah, you're trying to just hold it down for the
Luke is always trying to hold it down. Yeah, we're talking on a freaking galactic level
Right, right because you know, he's working for his uncle Owen. Yeah, and there's like farming to do
Is there farming to do?
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There's some farm again guy guys, so what happened so luke. Yeah, he's so luke's going luke's trying to freaking down
Yeah, be the you know be the man of the house
Yeah, yeah, probably yeah, and then good all of a sudden he's out farming. Yes, and then freaking
Princess Leila comes into the picture
Out of nowhere dude. Yeah, it's kind of close though. He's not far from here. Yeah, so you're getting there. Yeah. Hey luke. Oh, she's there
luke. Yeah, she's there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
um my goats they need hey
You know and then that just spins into a day in day out kind of
You know they just keep running into each other and then
And then she just probably ends up ruining it. She does ruin it does she yeah, she ruins it
Yeah, so it took eight movies
And wait, what was the princess's name? Did you say Leila?
Right Leila princess Leila. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and describe her hairstyle bra. It's a bra. No, you call you bra
Cinnamon cinnamon buns. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, right. Come on. All right, so
Come on and then how does Darth Vader?
Bra we're talking. We're talking now. This is where it gets real interesting
Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because it does right people don't know. Uh-huh till this day. Yeah
Oh, you know some inside scoop. They don't know the connection of
of
Princess Leila and Darth they really don't and what's the connection?
Dude, why do you keep looking at that dude? I love this fucking guy
Dude, what's the connection? I'm telling you
It's it's it's I mean, I know we both know but like yeah for the viewers. Yeah, so for those of you who got they've been talking to you guys
um
It's just it's one of those things where
You really wouldn't believe
The bill unless unless uh, yeah unless you read the script, but I I read it. I read the script, right, right? Yeah
So the outtake so is it what is it?
She actually
Yeah designs
The call the costumes for him
Wait, what?
What let's think about that
No, I think think about look, okay. So my question to you
He has one costume
For the whole fucking movie. Yeah, so that one costume she designed when was it made?
Right, right when was it made think about it think about it
So can I just say something to you because I've seen the movie as many times, okay?
Okay, okay, you might not know this right how off was was that how accurate was that well first of all
Not accurate at all really yeah, because um, it would be impossible for her to design
The Darth Vader suit since she's right the daughter of Darth Vader
And he had the costume see before she was born
You know me see Bobby this is looking and Princess Leia to our brothers and sisters Leia or Leila. It's Leia
Oh, yeah. Yeah. The hairstyle you got down. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So um, yeah
I just don't think I don't know how I know. I don't know what script you read
Yeah from George Lucas or whatever notes, but that would be impossible, right? Okay. Yeah. Yeah
because he had the suit because um, um
Obi-Wan they get in that five nobs
I know no you call you really know. Yeah, I know the character on a freaking nickname basis
You know
Yeah, so if you were on like Tatooine and you saw Ben Kenobi you call him Kenobi. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I'd be like cozy
All right, right. Yeah, so that's pretty good. So that's so what let me ask you something
Did you never want us to watch it or?
You know, I was just too busy watching freaking goonies and apocalyptic. Oh, so oh shit. Yeah
Yeah, apocalyptic apocalyptic Mel Gibson. Yeah, that's a great movie. How much times have you watched it one time?
You don't need to watch it. I don't need to watch it one time. Yeah, really?
And you said there's hidden gems in there. There is give me what?
The traps
Do you remember the the the bore trap? Yeah
And what it ended up doing
Capturing the bore
The bad guy remember. Mm-hmm. Oh, that's why you might have not caught it the first time
Yeah, a long story short my mom watched it like every
I mean till this day she probably watched it over 80 something times
But you know, they try to cancel mel Gibson. Why?
Some oh some stuff, you know
Yeah, yeah
When he gets drunk, he doesn't like the juice when he only gets a drunk when he drinks the juice
He doesn't like the juice. Oh, that was the motto that you heavy. Okay. Well, I am referring to
mel
pre-1994
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, when he's just Gibb
What he was just give Gibbs. Yeah. Yeah, give me boy
Yeah, so that's one of your movies and then and the other one was what goonies goonies. Yeah, the great movie the bra the best
Well, there's other one. I think you feel I feel like you're only saying that because you don't have a lot of things to compare it to
But I have to do I have to say something. It is a good movie. I like it
What would you compare it to what other movies?
Of that same era of that same era. Yes
Um, I would have this year was it well, I think you know Raiders of the lost ark is pretty good
Raiders of the lost ark
Indiana Jones
Never loved the ride never watched it though
The ride was good. The ride is sick. Wow. I did sick. Yeah. Yeah. The boulder. Did you see et?
I never watched the fool thing
Do you know the alien right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah phone home. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but that's kind of similar to me
Because I was really young when et came out
So I have like glimpses like some memories and I know like the the you know et phone home
But I never I don't remember the whole movie. Yeah
How
But I also want to say and I think your friends were watching at home
They're thinking that I'm doing the same thing now. Yeah attacking and stuff
But what I'm saying to everyone listening
Especially to your friends is that you know, I'm a kid from the suburb of san diego
I had nothing else to do just to smoke weed and watch movies, right?
If I'm out on an island with you, right, I don't know how to catch a muscle
What do you mean?
He's talking about muscle like like bivalves. Oh
Gilbert you're fine. Were you feeling uncomfortable? No, I just didn't understand you. I think you thought you had to catch a muscle
I'm still thinking about no, no that that that still struck me by surprise. I'm sorry
That struck at first. I was like muscle or like because you don't have to catch muscles
I know you don't have to catch it. We don't have a baseball mid. I know that you know hands, right?
I got one. You know, I know you're not gonna
I know that I think but I don't even if I were to go like the harvest in the ocean
I wouldn't know where to go to eat it sometimes there's there's there's the intertidal zone
So they just prop up and you can just pick them off a rock. Yeah, I didn't know that. I'm sorry
I don't I don't do that. Oh, I'm fine. Oh, no, it's in California. I do it all the time. All right. Am I bad?
All right, everyone's fine. I don't know how to do it. Wait a second
So you said you were a treasure hunter when you were growing up and outside before we started we were all arguing arguing about
You know, what happens? What would we do if we find something like we know is super valuable
Do we get home or do we call the experts? Yeah, give us the background on that. It's okay. Yeah, so goonies
I love my favorite movie, right? Yeah, right? Yeah, full circle change my life really
It really good. Yeah. Well, I mean you probably identified it with the data
To data. Yeah. Yeah. Did you actually? Yeah. Yeah me too from like a
As a kid I was like, well, there's me. Yeah. Well, I always wanted to be the everybody wanted to be data
Exactly, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah at the end. I mean if there was a part two
He'd probably get the girl too probably. Yeah. Well, Josh Brolin first
Which is, you know, Josh Brolin? Thanos
What's his character's name in Goonies? He was the um, Sean Austin's older brother. Oh
Frick it. Yeah, the muscular guy. You're looking. He's a huge actor now. He's like a big movie star now
Really? Yeah, Josh Brolin? Josh bro Thanos. You're laughing Thanos. Oh, that's him? Yeah. Yeah
Oh, it's hard to tell because he's so like
I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, of course. I'm not saying he turned into a purple. Yeah. Yeah. He's a stone
My mouse trying to picture our face. Yeah, and I was like, no, I've seen the movie. Did you ever see did you ever see, um,
The Deadpool movies?
No, no, I heard that was super good in the second Deadpool movie. He's the cable. Yeah. He's in it
Okay. Yeah, anyway, he's a big actor now. But anyway, Josh Brolin, but let's move on. I mean treasure treasure. Yeah
Yeah, so what you're supposed to do is,
if you find something, you're to bring it up
to professionals.
And the thing is, is like on Kauai,
like I don't know who to bring it up to.
Who do you call?
Like just like, oh, I have a friend of a friend
who's like an archeologist?
Yeah, because exactly because I had on photo,
an albumine, you know, from 1800 or whatever,
of Queen Liliokalani.
And I wanted to get it authenticated,
so I went to Kauai Museum and asked the curator,
and then I think the lady at the time was like,
oh, yeah, you know, unfortunately,
we're just gonna have to like break it open and stuff to.
I said, mm, no, no, yeah, no.
So ever since I said, where you took it back?
Yeah, I took it back.
And you don't let them fucking break it open.
No, no, no.
Do you know why you don't let them break it open?
Why?
Because that thing's fucking yours.
Yeah, you found it on your property.
That's your fucking thing.
Yeah.
All right.
Hey archeologists, let me say something to you guys.
All right, fuck you.
I'm part of all your shit, man.
Why?
And education and all that stuff.
If him and I find a fucking arc,
if him and I find the goblet of fire.
The national trend, like a real holy national trend.
Whatever, if we find a slab of anything
with fucking things on it, you know what I mean?
It's ours, and we're gonna sell it, baby, fuck you.
My great uncle was the original Tomb Raider, right?
So, but the reason that, why you look-
Yeah, his name was Laura.
Laura Croft.
Laura Croft Coon.
No, his name was-
You don't know Laura Croft Coon?
No.
Yeah, all right, anyway.
His name was Byron the Pro Rock,
and he was like the OG Tomb Raider.
But it's actually not as cool as the movie makes it seem,
because he was just a rich boy,
who had the money and the means to kind of unearth,
to travel the world and unearth all of these treasures,
and he took them.
So like the archeological community really was like,
hey, you can't fucking just waltz in here,
and you're like some pseudo fucking,
some pseudo archeologists, and just take it.
What is pseudo?
Like fake.
Oh, real.
Not real, yeah.
A pseudo science.
Oh, okay.
Let me ask you something.
Sudo.
But Bobby, if you had the means and the money,
you're like, I'm gonna go to Tunisia,
and just start digging for what I think
there's a ruby down here.
No, I don't think I would do that.
Well, I have to do research first.
I'm not gonna just blindly go to some desert and go out.
He goes to Tunisia.
He goes to Tunisia.
That's where my grandma was buried,
and she was apparently buried
with an insane amount of ruby carrots.
So your uncle went to go and raid that?
No.
Yeah, we should raid it.
We should raid it.
But she was buried in Tunisia.
We gotta get it.
In North Africa.
We gotta get it.
Yeah.
I love rubies.
The only thing I know is that it is in the same town
where Sophia Loren used to vacation.
So I was looking that up,
because I was like, fuck, I wanna exhume that bitch.
Let me, okay, so if we started a,
our own archeologist company, right?
And let's talk about the things we wanna try to get here.
So here's what I think is gonna be worth a lot of money,
okay, and this is real.
Would you, the knife that killed Jesus.
Okay.
The sheather.
No, remember he got stabbed on the side, right?
I didn't know that.
Well, he had a cutter.
How did that happen?
Can you tell me how that happened?
The Romans pinned him to the thing, the truss.
Check.
Right, right?
Check.
And they stabbed him in the stomach with a knife.
Check.
Right?
Where is that knife?
But we find it.
That's gotta be worth $3,000.
But are you sure it was a knife?
Right?
Minimum.
We got the knife with some of the blood.
Minimum.
Minimum three grand.
Minimum in the black market.
Yeah.
What do you think, what were you charged for that?
Honestly?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Start with a million.
Yeah.
You would think it's only one of them.
Yeah.
It's the only one.
They didn't have duplicates.
I would sell it back to the Catholic Church
and they have all the money in the world.
Right.
The Catholic Church has all the money.
Right.
So we gotta get all that shit.
How about the fucking nails?
How does one authenticate it though?
You would have to be in cahoots with somebody
who already wants a piece of that pie.
Yeah.
But I also think that Jesus' blood on the thing
and they can't analyze it.
Mm.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Can they not?
They should be able to do it.
So they have it.
Check out this.
This is pure Jesus DNA.
No?
I feel a little hard.
I'll just run it through 23 and me.
Exactly.
Just swap it.
What the fuck is that for?
We mail it.
We mail it.
Like that's what, how imagine that.
We mail.
They open a soap.
They open up and there's a fucking nail in it.
An ancient nail.
They analyze it.
What do you think it would come up with?
But imagine who it would be linked to.
It'll probably say 3% Native American.
Oh for sure.
Always.
Always.
They always.
What's the, imagine what?
Imagine what?
I'm just saying imagine if you swabbed that cloth
and then who it would be linked back to.
Oh my, it'd just be one person, right?
Oh, true.
Imagine.
I'm just thinking.
What if they called you?
The closest.
Bloodline.
Descendant.
To Jesus.
Guy, you know what?
It's funny you say that.
Really?
Is it funny that he says that?
I can't wait to hear what you're about to say.
Yeah, what's the follow up to that?
You are the first person to say that.
From aesthetically to.
Okay.
He's probably closer to what Jesus looked like, honestly.
Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.
I mean, that's the most.
I don't want your friends to be mad at me.
Okay.
Cause I'm trying to be, be about love, right?
Yeah.
But that's the most arrogant fucking thing
I've ever heard in my fucking life.
You think that you were the closest looking to Jesus?
In this room?
Probably.
Okay.
Let me change it up.
I know.
Honestly, it has to be real.
I was the closest to Jesus.
Yeah, no, you're right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're right.
Hold on, look at the hair real quick.
Yeah, yeah.
You're right.
Come on.
I'm Jesus.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, can I be honest with you?
If Jesus looks, looked like you back in the day.
Yeah.
I don't think he would go on without as much followers.
Really?
More.
He would have got more.
He would have got more.
If he looked like you, he would think you got more.
I don't know, bro.
Common.
I mean, your eyes are so close together, I don't know, man.
All right, guy.
What's his?
Where was his?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Me neither, yeah.
I don't know what the guy looked like.
We don't know his eyes.
We don't know what he looks like, you know what I mean?
Maybe that was a thing.
That's a thing.
All right.
Listen, I love you.
I want your friends to like me.
So you look good looking guy, but I'm just saying.
Thank you.
What else could we find as an archaeologist?
Well, a ship would be, I mean, a ship.
Like a full vessel of some sort.
Right.
You know, you just, maybe a submarine or something.
You just open up just black taped bags.
Imagine that.
I'm sorry.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about what you're talking about.
What are you talking about?
Yeah, yeah.
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
Oh my God.
That's what you're thinking.
Now we're thinking.
Now we know what you're talking about.
Now we're really black and green.
Move, you know what I mean?
We know how to sell that.
Yeah.
Because if we got Jesus's knife, right?
It'd be like, how do we, what do we call?
Well, they come and find you.
The Freemasons would find you.
They have a whole Explorers Club in here.
We'd be fucked.
Yeah.
We'd be fucked, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interesting.
So what if we found, do you think if we found Hitler's mustache?
How was that preserved?
Let me ask you something.
If you found Hitler's mustache,
do you think that that's worth anything?
I wouldn't even touch that thing.
I, hey, I ain't getting close to that.
Hey, I'm not, I'm not.
I would pick it up with tweezers.
I'm not trying to be all superstitious.
Superstitious.
Oh, you think it's Haunted?
You think his mustache is Haunted?
Am I the one who?
Yeah, I think so.
Probably.
What if I found it and I put it on mine just as a joke?
Oh, I would not do that.
That'd be funny.
I don't think it's like Haunted as much as it's like bad juju.
It's like bad energy, right?
Stay away from it.
Yeah, it's the same reason why I always think twice
before like bringing anything back from an antique store.
Like I have to hold it and see if it feels good.
I know you've seen the movie.
I know you've seen the movie.
I have seen all of the horror movies.
Yes, right.
What movie you referred to?
Tell me who, in their right mind, would see Annabelle Doll.
Yeah, Annabelle Doll, Conjuring.
This is cute.
Right.
But the Annabelle Doll in the Conjuring
didn't look like that.
You know what the doll looked like, right?
Not really.
Yeah, so show them what they really look like,
because it's an actual doll.
OK.
But they made the Annabelle Doll in the movie
is way more scary, right?
So like, look at the original doll.
How dare I assume?
Yeah, you assumed.
That's Hollywood magic, is what you're saying.
Yeah, I tried to leave all the assumptions in 2022.
So you just like that movie.
The Conjuring?
Annabelle and Conjuring, all that.
Yeah, I did like it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I like how they kind of stitch the real family
and the accounts and stuff like that that happened.
That's not the, that is not the real thing.
I swear to God.
Now, think if that was the movie, the horror film.
See, now, if that was in the movie, people were like,
ah, I'm going to watch it.
What?
It looks like Raggedy Ann.
It's a Raggedy Ann doll.
Yeah, Raggedy Ann doll.
Yeah, yeah.
See, now what?
Yeah, I mean, I didn't take that home.
Honestly.
I know, right?
I was sleep on it in bed, cuddling.
For sure.
Right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, so it's not really that scary.
Yeah.
Oh, that's crazy.
It's crazy.
Maybe Hitler's mustache is not that scary.
Yeah, what if it's cute?
What if it's like a little like.
Landing strip.
Yeah, imagine a little guy.
A little guy going.
A little googly eye.
A little googly eye.
What even is.
Say it to me.
Hitler's mustache.
You know what I mean?
And you're like, oh.
You pick that up.
Even if that thing was in a layer of permafrost.
Right.
No, there's no way.
You can't touch that.
You can't touch that.
Yeah, you can't touch that.
Yeah, you're right.
So we would let that go.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So like if I came in, I was like in the office.
We're in the office, right?
And I go, all right, I have a board.
Yeah.
Where are we going to go for guys?
You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we got Hitler's mustache.
No.
No.
No.
Next.
Next.
OK.
We got what else do we got here?
You got anything, Gilbert?
Yeah.
How about just an actual fossil?
That's cool.
So honestly, if you say you found our actual Raptor skull,
you're not going to.
That would cost.
We couldn't sell that for shit.
Wait.
Why?
A skull?
Any actual dinosaur.
Any dinosaur.
Dude, I feel like you go to every museum they have it.
That is a good point.
Oh, you're saying there's no market for it.
There's no money for it.
It's like, really?
I've got a T-Rex finger.
You know what?
You don't.
T-Rex finger.
I don't know how much.
I don't know what they are.
I had a finger.
Do they have fingers?
I don't even know.
Yeah.
Flaws?
Yeah.
I had a homie who stole petrified rock outside of a museum
and sold it back to them.
Oh, really?
That's what you do.
Petrified wood, petrified wood.
So petrified wood is really heavy,
but also very expensive, even small bits of it.
You can sell them back to the museum, right?
So one time at night, he just took a couple of big, big chunks
from they had it just out there.
But he was smart enough to be like, wait,
that's petrified wood.
Why is this outside of the museum?
Yeah.
So how much is petrified wood?
It's like, you get a lot of money.
Wait, remember the guy that would frickin' go under the mud
and grab them?
The logs?
Big logs of them?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So let me ask you something.
It's petrified wood.
Can we find it in the world?
Yeah.
You have small chunks of it.
You could go to Nevada.
There are a lot of it out in the, if you go on hikes and stuff.
Then why do you grab them?
You're not allowed to collect them.
But how much are they?
I mean, you can get a lot.
He got like a couple thousand for the big one that he got.
Why wouldn't that be a thing that you would do as a living?
Oh, people do this.
Yeah, they do.
Was that for the George?
Petrified wood accent stool, $1,200.
Accent stool?
Well, you get to turn it into a stool, though.
You got to be a carpenter or whatever.
Anyway, brother.
We can make it.
Jesus was a carpenter.
Really?
Yeah, he was.
You're right.
I wonder, oh, how about this?
What didn't that would cost?
Something that he made.
Oh, wait there?
Yeah.
Like, yeah.
One left.
Well, we could sell on Etsy or whatever, right?
Well, you know how, like, Target mislabel stuff?
Imagine.
Imagine you've seen, like, a table and you're like,
that doesn't look like.
Right.
And they just accidentally, in transit, mixed it up.
Right.
So you're saying that if we got something that he made,
if through what?
Target, target, target, yeah.
To what?
To what?
Wait, instead of this, made in transit is made by Jesus?
Yeah.
Yeah, Jerusalem.
They also get made by Jesus.
Made by Jesus.
In Jerusalem.
Dude, dude.
No.
That we do, if we got something made by Jesus.
Oh my god.
Wait, are there any, like, artifacts that, like, Jesus made?
Like, why is there, why did we know he was a carpenter
if there's no, like, where's his woodshop?
Wait, that's another good point.
You're right.
Where's his shit?
Where's the ottoman?
Where is it?
Where's the Jesus ottoman, man?
Do you know the answer to that?
No, I don't.
Where's the lamp or whatever they make?
Also, no disrespect to both of your.
No disrespect.
No disrespect to both of your Mormon upbringings,
because I know that you were also baptized Mormon.
But where are Joseph's, like, things?
Joseph Smith's things.
That's the question for?
They have his things.
Where are his things?
His trousers and stuff?
No, no, no.
They have it all in the fall.
Where are the trousers?
Tablets, yeah, the golden tablets.
The golden tablets.
They disappeared, didn't they?
Where are they, Bobby?
They disappeared, didn't they not?
Yeah, but only he could see them.
Why?
Because he's the chosen one, baby.
If everyone could see it, he wouldn't be the chosen one,
baby.
You all right?
That's a good point.
Nio, right in the matrix, he's the only one
that can do that to a baby.
Oh, the one.
Like, fly around.
He's the one, baby.
OK.
You can't have everyone be the one.
Yeah.
Because then there would be no one.
Well, I see some stuff, too, sometimes, that I think.
I just got one sky.
There you go.
What do you mean?
You know, you don't, you know, what do you see, dude?
You guys just, just, yeah, maybe.
No, be real.
You see things?
No.
No, I'm not like the sixth sense.
You know what I mean?
All right, all right.
Yeah.
But what do you see?
What are your visions you're talking about?
Just, oh, do you see that?
Funny things out in public.
I always catch the, I always catch the random anti-tripping
falling.
Ah, yeah, yeah.
I'm like, oh, I see, I see.
You're just a good observer.
You're maybe watching too much.
You're watching to people too much.
Yeah, yeah.
It's fun.
But let me ask you, because you're on Kauai, the island,
and because of like, you know, the things
they're shooting up in Alaska.
What do you mean?
The spy balloon.
The spy balloon.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Because you would think that in a remote place like Kauai,
they would see some flying object.
Have you seen any?
Yeah.
We've seen something that I have the video of.
I mean, real?
I'm dead serious.
Apparently, they're saying it was the jet thrusters
on a frickin' missile or whatever.
You know, the things that break off?
Yeah.
From 2008.
Let me get this straight.
Let me get this straight.
Let me get this straight.
Let me get this straight, OK?
Can you decipher?
No, I can decipher it, all right?
So what he's saying is, you know,
when you see like a movie like Apollo 13 or whatever,
and there's things that break off from the ship.
Yes, yes.
You got one of those.
Yeah, all of Hawaii's seen it.
But from 2008, and it just fell down.
Just two years ago or so, it re-entered our atmosphere.
And where did it fall to?
I don't know where it fell to.
All right, here we go.
But what did it look like in the sky?
Bra, do you guys ever play Super Smash Bros?
OK, yeah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, I'm trying to follow you.
Super Smash Bros, the original, the Nintendo 64.
So you know when you choose Star Fox, that map?
Yeah.
You know that ship that you're fighting on?
Yeah, you saw that.
Oh, you're saying the map?
OK, got it.
So it was just lights, right?
It was just a bunch of lights, but in the shape of.
And 2008, so the phones weren't even that great at capturing.
Yeah, you know what, bro?
You didn't see it.
You didn't see it.
Wait, hold on.
This was two years ago.
No, no, no, this was two years ago.
This is bullshit.
No, you want to see the vid?
I'll show you the vid now after, whatever.
OK, so you have a vid of that phone.
Yeah, I have a vid.
It's not as good as the other vids that were posted, though.
OK, and so the ones that are good that are posted,
what do I see when I'm looking at it?
Guy, you see what looks like, it's just
like a bunch of flashing lights just passing through.
Yeah, but we're just seeing the thing that part of a rocket
ship that we've launched, right?
Or you're saying that it's extraterrestrial?
No, no, no, I'm not saying what it is or isn't.
I'm saying what the newspaper came out and what NASA said it was.
So what you're saying is something different.
We thought we'd seen one like just a ship, right?
But then the newspaper came out and said, oh, no,
what you guys seen was, oh, my gosh, it's like an object.
They're lying is what you're saying.
They come off.
Right.
Well, the interesting thing is that thing
came off from a missile launch in 2008.
Yeah.
Two years ago, they said it happens all the time.
So it was just the first to make any sense.
Does it make any sense?
Yeah, but also if it re-enters the atmosphere,
like what is the risk of it like just landing on like a fucking
like building?
Yeah, that's why I'm like, oh, shoot, well, it was weird
because it didn't come straight down.
It was coming, well, at least not towards Kauai.
It was just like it was just flying by, you know?
And then Oahu seen it like a lot of the different islands
seen it.
Oh, my God.
Which means it would have had to travel towards Big Island
from Kauai.
Have you guys heard of the horns?
What's the horn?
Guy.
So dramatic the way you did.
No.
No, I have.
You know about the horns?
No, because what do you do?
You look high.
It's the same look that you did but the Luke Skywalker
say you don't know what the fuck you were talking about.
So stop doing the look.
What does that look?
Do you know what I'm talking about the horns?
All over the world.
All over the world.
Wait, why?
I don't know what that is.
In remote places all over the world,
people have taken their camera or whatever out, right?
On the nice phones.
Yeah.
And have captured horns in the sky.
What kind of horns?
No, no, no, no, no, we're not talking about fucking.
You know what I mean?
Goat?
What did you say?
Yeah, we're talking about Trumpets.
Wait, and that's just not like, oh, those stars,
if you connect them is a horn.
No, no, that's not what we're talking about.
Is that?
No, no, we're not talking about this audio.
Audio.
This is broad day.
Broad day you hear.
In the distance.
But it's like, OK, that's 15.
That's not what that's not the ones I heard.
No, some of them are like that.
What is your sound?
Some are like.
Right.
But like nine.
Right here, here.
Sweden.
In Michigan, another trumpet like sound.
In British Columbia, Canada.
Dr. Glenn McPherson.
Wow, that's just happening in the sky.
It just sounds like the Pride of America cruise ship.
No, it's a cruise ship.
Maybe these are happening where there's no buildings or nothing.
Really?
Yeah.
And it sounds like maybe like an animal that's looking for a mate.
It's not like, you know what I mean?
I want to fuck.
Yeah, I mean, you think I want to fuck.
No, I mean, why wouldn't an animal do that?
It's sometimes like when if they have to vocalize
that far for a mate, it could be like, oh.
Yeah, yeah, it's not what's good.
It's quite a lot.
Yeah, you're very good.
Is that you out there?
I'm looking for a mate.
That's how when I land on this island, immediately I'm like,
oh.
That actually turned me on.
Yeah, you're right.
I would come to you.
I would come to you if you heard it.
A girl does that.
OK.
Yeah, but my point is, is that it's not that, I don't think.
It's something that's unexplainable.
Yeah.
But I think it's alien in nature.
So you're a believer, aren't you?
Well, you know, it's hard not to believe.
It's hard not to say that there isn't something.
I wasn't that.
But I can't, until there's some real evidence,
personal evidence, right?
Like I didn't see what you saw, you know what I mean,
Kawhi or whatever.
But if I witnessed that, maybe I would believe.
But you know, I don't, I'm a little skeptical,
but I'm open.
I'm open to it.
Same.
And like even after seeing that, I'm like, OK, whoa.
What is that?
And then when they said what it was, I'm like, oh, that doesn't
hit when they lie.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I wish the newspapers would be like, we don't know either.
Yeah.
Hold.
Yeah, but the idea that, I mean, yes, that would be nice.
But I think people would freak out.
People would lose it.
Yeah.
Have you seen signs?
People lose their shit.
Quickly.
Guy.
Chaos happens fast.
Or what is that?
What is it?
What is that one that you cannot talk?
Oh, that's the quiet place?
Yes.
Them aliens were scary.
Mental.
Those ones.
I mean, you really think like, would it be like that?
Like if they're, because that we're all fucked up.
It kind of raid doesn't.
What?
Nothing.
Raid raid.
Aren't they aren't they ants?
Oh, like insects, insects, right?
Just real, real, the sound is what they do, right?
Like Sonic.
Is that what that's how they defend it?
And what are you doing?
What is that?
That was a noise.
I tried to, you know what?
It's weird that you guys hear it.
Usually that was crazy what you just did.
Normal people don't let me try to do that.
Yeah.
Do it again.
But he's doing moving his.
Do it again.
How are you not moving your lips?
That's it.
That's it.
Thank you.
Yeah, you do it.
You're very, very good.
Very.
Yeah, he said yours was more monk seal.
Yeah.
Why do we always do that?
That's it.
I tried my best.
I tried my best.
Monk seal is good.
I guess that's right.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, there was a monk seal that attacked the lady out here.
You seen that?
Yeah.
She got to know what happened.
In front of Kaimana.
Kaimana Hotel, yeah.
Yeah.
He was in the hotel.
She was swimming in an area where
she was told not to swim because the mom had just
had a pup, a young baby.
So when that happens, who's that are you on?
I'm the main monk seal all the way.
Monk seal 3.
100%.
You monk seal?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Are you monk seal on that side?
OK.
Yeah.
Because she was in the lobby of the hotel,
and the monk seal did it.
You're in her home.
You're in her home, you're in her home.
You're right, you're right.
Monk seal.
Because I'm still a monk seal, you're right.
That's a smart monk seal.
It's a smart monk seal.
Go into a lobby, check in.
Check in, yeah.
Attack a woman.
Also probably had to wear a jacket.
Upstats?
Yeah, so monk seal for sure.
Yeah.
Upstats.
Right.
And a wig, probably.
Yeah.
Right?
A monocle.
On top of another monk seal with a jacket.
All right.
Oh, should have the jacket.
So it's rehearsed.
Yeah.
Right, and it's clever.
And I like it monk seal.
I'm on a monk seal side, still.
In any of those, I'm always on the animal side, because you're smart.
Right.
Like when a baby falls into the gorilla cage.
Whoa.
Are you asking me whose side I'm on?
The baby.
The baby, right?
Is that why you said, whoa?
Your baby side?
Yeah, I'm a baby.
Like a human baby or a gorilla baby?
What?
A human baby.
Oh, human baby?
Yeah, not a baby, like a five-year-old.
The baby.
Five-year-old all the way.
OK, how about this?
18-year-old punk kid who's fucking around with his friends.
He falls into the thing.
Yeah, monkey for sure.
But my point is silver.
But I'm still on the baby, though.
I'm trying to figure out what that is.
You know, it's like.
Well, baby is a little bit more helpless, right?
Like we're able-bodied at that point.
A five-year-old could have just accidentally not
read the correct instructions and found himself there.
Can I say something to you?
Let me ask you something, OK?
I've been at the zoo as a five-year-old, right?
Yeah.
They're just instinctual things.
I think your parents intentionally threw you in there.
They wanted you gone.
Wait, no, you did not end up in a guy.
You ended up in a frickin' exhibit, didn't you?
What guy?
No, she was just making a fucking.
Oh, I was like.
I didn't actually do that, dude.
Shit.
All right, I'm on human side.
I mean, the human side.
Human side, yeah.
Let's move on.
Anyway, yeah, yeah.
I think you do belong in a zoo.
Think about that.
You walk into, like, a zoo.
And you just like to talk to me.
I think that if aliens captured humans in the end
and they had a zoo on the alien planet.
You get to choose.
Then I would have my own exhibition.
You would get your own, isn't it?
Who else?
Who do you think would be next to you?
They would have different kinds.
I think John Cena.
Oh, here.
10 celebrities.
Right, right.
If you had to choose 10 celebrities, aliens have a zoo.
Because you would have to showcase different types.
Right.
That's what I'm saying.
So this is going to be a fat Korean one from San Diego.
Brad Williams.
Oh, for sure.
From?
No, but I would not get him.
There's other more people.
Peter Dinklage.
I didn't want to say it, but that's.
The short guy on the Game of Thrones.
I never watched Game of Thrones.
But I heard it was really, really good.
So if I was an alien, I would have to dress up
the exhibition, too.
So with Peter Dinklage, what I would do
is have a fireplace and have him put him
in a smoking jacket.
And so that's how you would see him.
He's a little person.
He's a little person.
OK.
So you have Peter Dinklage.
Just name the 10 in the zoo that the aliens would choose.
He's an actor.
So.
OK.
Yeah.
So John Cena's exhibition would probably be what?
I would have like a bunch of like kind of dummies.
You know what I mean?
Punching thing, you know, like punching, you know, right?
Waits?
I mean, you just have like a big like hand
in the front of the window.
Oh, it's the right, right?
That's interesting.
Very interesting.
Motion.
Very interesting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right.
You see him like parts of the day.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right.
An alien would have to kind of find the spot.
Interact it.
It's an interactive thing.
Thank you so much.
And that's why you're part of the Alien Zoo exhibition.
Yeah, thank you.
I'm on the board now.
You're on the board.
Yeah, for sure.
Right.
Thank you.
Number three, I think either you or Danny DeVito.
I love how that's who you have to choose between.
Sub-sub-sub-sub.
That's probably the rudest thing.
That hurts so fucking bad just now.
I have to let that fucking suck in.
Danny DeVito who?
Short and funny.
Short and funny.
Oh, my God.
Is that the name of?
You would think that Danny DeVito would be more of the Peter
Dinklids between them, too.
See, I thought you're going to go more like Korean.
Celebrity or comics.
They choose one comic.
This committee is not getting along.
OK.
We agreed on John Cena.
Yeah, that's good.
Yeah.
Peter Dinklids.
We're with Peter Dinklids, right?
We'll talk about me later, right?
So let's.
What are musicians?
Who could represent?
Hot chick.
We have the hot chick.
Yeah, they have the prototype, like a Pam Anderson.
Like a Pam Anderson.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, we're talking people who aren't even alive yet.
Well, she's alive.
Pam Anderson's alive.
I say we're opening it up to like, can we open it up?
Let me see.
Can we talk to people?
Yeah.
Or no, it's no.
Well, maybe aliens.
We have, if we have the technology to re-own them.
Yeah.
Michael Jackson.
Michael Jackson, for sure.
You know who that is?
Yeah.
Yes, I do.
I actually watch.
I actually watch the Jackson 5, the movie,
the seven hour long movie?
Yeah.
Twice.
Why twice?
I thought I was the first time.
No, I tried to learn the songs.
What is the Jackson 5?
My favorite Christmas album is the Jackson 5 Christmas album.
And in the Michael Jackson exhibition,
what would you put in there?
I mean, just a bunch of.
A bunch of what?
A bunch of what?
A bunch of tilting mannequins.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, OK, OK.
Just a lean.
Well, you put a monkey in there.
He loves those.
Does he?
Yeah, he had his own monkey.
He did?
Yeah, he had giraffe.
No, what was his monkey?
His monkey was a famous name.
Let me try to guess it.
It was Sparkle.
That's Sparkle.
Is it?
Yeah, yeah.
His monkey was called, it was a chimp.
I forgot, damn it.
But he had a famous.
What's it called?
Bubbles.
Bubbles.
Bubbles.
So he had a monkey.
Bubbles.
That's legal.
We put a monkey in there.
OK.
And then we probably put it in.
Is this an interactive one where your kids can walk through?
No.
Alien kids, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, right.
I mean, we could have a little ride.
It's just two empty shoes.
And you put your feet in and just moons walk.
Just all the way.
That's right.
And here's what we'll do too.
We put mannequins in there, right?
But mannequins from, like, Gap Kids.
Hmm.
I'm not laughing.
It's not that funny.
Just to have them, all right?
Because people love Michael Jackson.
Yeah, well, I mean, you could have different outfits.
They would have made.
You could have different outfits.
Although, you know, he would ruin those fucking mannequins,
I think.
The aliens are cleaning it one day.
It's like, why are there so many holes?
Because there's a hand in the mannequin.
The other end is like, I don't know.
You could have an audio loop.
You gotta get another one.
You know what I mean?
This one's ruined.
He's biting the thighs.
He escapes the five-speedered Englishes room.
OK, so let's go to a different exhibition.
Well, let's do three women.
Three women in one exhibition?
That's great.
Yeah, like the most different looking type of.
Whoopi Goldberg.
Oh, duh.
No.
No, yes.
From Scary Movie?
I was going to say, like.
Whoopi Goldberg.
From Scary Movie.
What do you say?
What do you say?
I love this guy.
It's called Ghost.
Ghost.
OK, so you could be a scary movie with ghosts?
No, did you see Ghost?
No.
See Ghost is the ghost.
You know what Ghost is?
No, you don't know.
That's right.
I love this guy.
So just put Whoopi in it.
We'll trust me.
OK, yeah.
He's an older African-American lady, black lady.
Yeah, with braids.
Yeah, with braids.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we put Whoopi in there.
Yeah, I thought you were going to say, like, scary movie.
Leslie.
Leslie who?
What about one of the frickin?
What about what about one of the Charlie's angels?
You know what I'm saying?
Which one though?
There's the one that.
The original or the new one?
The new one.
Oh, the ridge.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Like a blonde, like a buxom blonde.
But it's got to be somebody because we're aliens, right?
And we're on Earth now capturing, right?
Oh, we're the we're the aliens.
I thought we were humans putting, OK, got you.
OK.
You're saying that aliens hired us?
Yeah, I thought we were subcontracted out.
Oh, what the military does.
Yeah, yeah, I see.
OK, yes, it's OK.
My thinking's. No, no, no, no, no, you're right.
I think we should be humans.
Yes. Yeah.
So we're under a little pressure.
Exactly.
To represent us.
No, this museum's opening end of September.
At the end of September, also, like,
if we're on crunch time and if we don't get this shit right,
they put us in the zoo.
Oh, yeah.
All right, right.
So the committee is under pressure.
I want to take out Whoopi.
Let's put in Griner.
Brittany Griner.
What?
Put her in another prison.
Oh, that's right.
She was already in one.
My bad.
You know, Whoopi's good.
Whoopi's good.
She's like, that's legit.
Well, I was thinking instead of putting different types,
like maybe from different countries instead.
No.
America.
We're doing all America.
No, no, no.
You know, I got one.
Kevin Spacey.
And what is his thing?
He just likes to fuck young boys.
That's crazy.
We already have like a Jackson in there.
Oh, that's right.
You're right.
That's one of the same.
That's one of the same.
Maybe they'll share the same enclosement.
Right.
That's yeah.
Yeah.
And just as a guy that's a part of the board,
I just want to throw out a suggestion.
What do you throw it out, man?
Can we do a little exhibit?
Can we just have Hitler's mustache?
If we can find it?
Yeah.
OK, thank you.
It'll have its own.
That's just for me, OK?
Thank you.
Yeah.
It'll be in the basement.
It'll be, yeah.
Aliens will love to see that.
Anyway, all right.
Well, that's the athletes.
Oh, yeah.
See?
Oh, we would have to put fucking LeBron James.
Done for sure.
Over Michael Jordan.
Yeah, LeBron James.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
And then so we had LeBron James.
And then we would have to have.
Who's your favorite football?
Maybe somebody from the Special Olympics.
Mm.
You have me?
Do you know any athletes?
Like a spinal bifida, you know, the hurdle person.
James.
Just James.
No, that's Paralympics, Bobby.
Paralympics.
Oh, here we go.
I'm about to get canceled.
I'm about to get canceled again.
I'm about to get canceled again.
It's my bad.
What do you mean again?
You've got to cancel before.
People have tried.
Anyway, let's move on.
All right, so forget it.
No.
Yeah, Michael Phelps, though.
Michael Phelps.
Yeah, we have the water version of that.
Oh, we're talking water.
We're talking avatar.
We're talking tribes at this point.
Yeah, yeah, that's right.
Water, water, waterbenders.
We have land, LeBron, water.
We got fucking Michael Phelps, right?
What else is an avatar?
What's an avatar?
Fire.
What do we do for fire?
Ooh, a red head.
Cheeto Santino.
Yeah.
Out of all, wait, out of all the red heads in the world,
Andrew Santino.
No, I want to do the podcast.
Could you try again?
That was weird.
Who's the most famous red head in the world?
Carrot head.
Carrot top.
No.
I don't think so.
No, Prince Henry.
Harry.
Oh, Prince Henry.
Prince Harry.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Prince Harry?
Yeah.
Or no?
But he's not obviously like ginger.
Like, it needs to be like fiery, right?
I'm leaning toward carrot top.
Carrot top.
I'll give you guys a couple.
Susan is Miranda.
That's a good one.
No, no, no, we got it.
I think it's carrot top.
It's carrot top.
Conan O'Brien?
Carrot top.
Carrot top.
Yeah, because he is so weird.
He looks weird.
He's a great comic, I'm just saying.
I would even put Reba McIntyre over him.
Reba.
That's interesting.
Reba.
Oh, let's put Reba.
I think carrot top still.
I still think carrot top.
Damn.
I need to look up all these names.
Because carrot top.
Yeah, but because carrot top can do a show.
Right.
And Reba can't.
Right.
Reba's a performer.
Oh, she's OK.
Country singer.
Forget Lucille Ball then.
Oh, I love Lucille.
Lucille Ball.
You know who that is?
I love.
Oh, the movie I Love Lucille.
It used to be a show.
Oh, shit.
And she was like a redheaded actress.
Oh, shit.
Oh, OK.
What you just said there.
It put me into a different universe, but I'm back.
You needed a little break.
I needed a break from you for a second, right?
Yes.
But I came back.
OK, good.
Yeah, and I'm safe.
Yeah.
Yeah, I love you so much.
Perfect.
Perfect, thank you.
OK, carrot top it is.
Let's forget the movie.
We're done with this segment.
Yeah, this segment's so long.
I mean, we went from alien zoo, how long ago alien zoo?
Yeah.
Right, we did it.
We did it.
We found out at least eight.
We have it.
I have a question for you, Zave.
Yeah.
Actually, you too, Bobby.
This is mostly for you.
And it's really not a question, Marge, it's like an observation.
Why is it that you come to Hawaii and you never
eat any like plate lunch, musubis?
Like you only eat like white people food, like Zave.
Well, like burgers, hot dogs.
Yeah, like hot dogs.
What's a plate lunch?
Tell the audience.
Well, what's a plate lunch?
This is a plate lunch.
You go into an restaurant, you go into one spot,
and they have hot pans of dishes you can usually choose.
Or they have just pans of food.
You can go ahikatsu.
You can go teriyaki beef.
You can go hamburger steak, loco moco.
So you get usually like one, two choice.
On a bed, yeah, lao lao, lao lao.
Bed of rice, one side, maybe porky, and then
Max Allen usually.
Max Allen.
Why you never, never eat that?
Let me say something and I'll make a statement.
I think you're the whitest guy in the island.
That hurts.
But you might be true.
Yeah, but it sucks.
OK, you might be true.
But can I say something?
Yes.
I've tried all those things.
And oh, OK, wait.
Let me put my seatbelt on.
Yeah, my luck.
OK, so I've tried all those things, right?
And I found them to be OK.
Oh, OK, nice.
But I've trained my taste buds for a specific palate.
Hot dogs?
That's what you train your taste buds for?
Listen, lady, I don't just eat hot dogs.
It's a specific kind.
Oh, right, papa.
And there's something about a Chicago hot dog
with the peppers in it.
And because I, like, pickled things, right?
Cereous salt, the whole thing.
That makes it a completely different thing.
If it was a chili dog, no.
I just find it sacrilegious that, like, you wouldn't eat,
to me, the greatest food that exists, which is plate lunch.
Could food a lot of options?
Options, options, options.
I don't like the locomotion.
I don't like that.
Oh, it could be a pooh-central situation.
No, it's just I don't like ground beef in that style.
Well, what about I like spam, eggs, and kimchi,
all that stuff.
Is that a part of it?
I don't know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know I love that.
I'm addicted to that.
Chicken katsu.
I love chicken katsu.
I just had chicken katsu earlier today.
Nice.
So I've dabbled.
I've dabbled in the island shit, right?
But I'm not full island, man.
You know what I mean?
I apologize.
I love the ice.
What ice?
With the syrup on it.
Oh.
I love it.
I shaved ice.
Yeah, I thought, OK.
Don't you love shaved ice?
I was so fucking refreshing.
Ice can mean other things like men.
I almost said you meant that.
I like that too.
I don't like snorting it.
Like, I like smoking it.
Yeah, OK.
So I like smokable, methamphetamine ice, right?
I like shave ice.
Yeah, I like shave ice.
I also like, you know, asian-y desserts, right?
Delicious.
You know what?
Like, I almost said, I don't know.
But like red beans, you know, like a zuki.
Yeah, that kind of stuff, right?
Yeah.
So I mean, I do kind of dabble in it, right?
But I'm not fully island.
OK.
You know, and I apologize.
I'm sure it's great.
Maybe you can take me to a really good place
that does the local thing.
I'm be willing to try it again.
But the ones I've had, it just didn't hit me.
Yeah.
Like, I don't have a hunger for it.
I see.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
Yeah.
I mean, the thing about that is I'm the opposite.
Like, I almost can't eat too much of it
because of the way it hits me.
You know what I mean?
I get lethargic.
Oh, you do?
Yeah, I mean, you get tired.
Yeah, you tackle a fat plate like that.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm like, wow, my stomach really can stretch out.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
But that's something you would, like,
if you could only choose, let's say,
seven meals for the rest of your life,
would that be the kind of meals that you would have?
Oh, I mean, for sushi would 100% be number one.
Yeah, me too.
I'm with sushi.
I'm a raw fish person, am I not?
But, I mean, two, three, four, five, six would be something
local, you know what I mean?
Right, what would be seven?
The pizza?
You know what?
Maybe a smash burger.
Oh, I love a smash burger.
Or do we throw a salad in there?
I mean, no, no, no.
OK.
That doesn't even count.
You can eat them, but they're not even.
They have that good, the plate that.
That's it, that's it.
I don't know.
The place we went to go get smash burgers.
That was really good.
The daily, yeah, the daily burger.
And Chinatown.
Oh, Chinatown.
No, we're going to eat something tonight.
Let's do that.
Are you staying here?
I am staying here.
So let's eat tonight.
Yeah, let's go.
You want to eat with me tonight?
100%.
We'll have dinner tonight with the whole group.
That's sick.
But no local, local.
This is a light introduction here.
Do we have any questions or anything else
that we would talk about?
What is it?
Yeah, we got one unhelpful advice.
I'm going to just read it to you.
You're my boy forever, man.
I've been hanging out with and having sex with my neighbor
a few times.
Is this, wait, real generated questions from?
Yeah.
What?
It's AI.
No, it's AI.
It's a, oh, chat GPT.
I've never heard it.
It would say, is this real generating questions?
Wow.
I've been hanging out with and having,
this is a girl, by the way, I've
been hanging out with and having sex with my neighbor
a few times.
It's always gone well.
And he definitely seems into it when we were together.
But I can't figure out how to get our hangbangs to happen
more often.
I don't want to be annoying asking to hang all the time,
but I also want him.
Smiley face.
But what is the question?
She has had sex a couple of times with her neighbor.
She doesn't want to seem too desperate.
Are there any tactics or ways to get more hangbangs
without feeling like too needy?
From a girl to God dynamic.
Oh yeah, OK, from a girl.
Just ask.
Hey, what are you doing later?
Want to hang?
Simple as that.
I mean, again, this is just me.
But the answer has never been no.
Like, the answer is not going to be no.
He's going to be like, oh, I got shit to do today.
But definitely he's going to make an appointment
unless.
Definitely next year.
See you in 12 months.
But you know what I mean?
That's not being needy to say, hey, what's up?
Want to hang?
Yeah, I have a different advice.
What would you be advice to her?
My advice is this, that like one time,
I don't know if you'd like to hear these stories,
but one time.
Well, whether or not I do, you tell them anyway.
Yeah, well, yeah, yeah.
So what I was with this girl, you know what I mean?
A couple of months ago.
OK.
And you know, we're hooked up in the car.
You know, I'm finger banging on stuff, right?
In the car.
Right.
And then she goes, you want to come up?
I come.
Question really quick.
Do you do right hand or do you reach over your left hand?
I go from the behind.
Not in the car.
That's so complex.
No, not really.
That makes zero sense, dude.
What?
OK, he's sitting down in the car.
Yeah, yeah.
You guys are in the car.
I'm in the car.
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, sit a little closer.
So the pillow.
Yeah, so I'm here.
The pillow is a girl.
No, no, no.
What kind of, where are you?
Australia?
It's not right hand driving.
Well, for this, so we'd have to move.
Yeah, OK.
So, yeah.
Xavier, you're the driver.
How do you go behind?
Well, that's my question.
Oh, it's just a joke.
Oh, God.
What the fuck are you guys doing?
We don't know.
I'm like, hey, I stay from behind, get a laugh,
and then we move on.
Jesus Christ.
OK, OK, OK.
I'm at the safe.
I wanted to learn.
I wanted to learn.
OK.
Anyway, she was like, you want to come up?
And I go, no.
She's like, why?
I go, because I don't want to do it every time like that.
I want to savor it.
Ooh.
You told her?
Yeah.
Commanding.
I like that.
And I didn't have sex with her like three weeks after that.
Nice.
Because I don't want to do it.
Here's the thing.
Because I want it always to be a surprise.
I want it always to be like a special thing.
And when you're banging somebody every day,
you just lose interest.
That's a good point.
So I'm not going to do it as often.
I want it to be like.
You want to build up.
I had caviar twice in a row.
Not the same.
In New York.
The second time, it almost wanted me to vomit.
Well, that's why I don't do Costco like seaweed salad.
Like, I love seaweed salad.
But when you buy it in bulk, you just lose your joy.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah, OK.
So I'm telling this girl, it's like, you don't want to.
The whole idea of the fantasy and the desire and the want,
that doesn't necessarily have to be fulfilled.
Is that feeling, it's like when you audition for a movie,
like right now, and you're on hold for a movie,
it's not getting the part.
Because that'll disappear that feeling.
The journey.
It's right now, am I going to get it?
Yeah.
That's the feeling that I like.
I see.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
I get it.
You're basically saying you're addicted to the chase.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And because she's not giving you the chase
and she's giving it right away, you're creating a chase.
Or I could say it like this, I'm into the journey,
not the destination.
Is that what she should text her neighbor?
I'm into the journey, not the destination, but maybe.
No, because that might actually.
But when the destination happens, it happens, right?
It'll happen organically, right?
What she's saying is that she wants it to happen more often.
Yeah.
Right?
Yeah.
And it's like, if Xavier and I, not that we're gay,
but if we were, right?
And you and I banged two months ago.
It was really lovely, too.
OK.
I loved it.
How did you feel about it?
Great.
Yeah, it was great.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And we rabbit styled.
Definitely rabbit styled.
Quick stuff.
Yeah, quick stuff.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, we did the quick stuff, right?
Yeah, drywall.
Right, right.
And we both wanted the last couple of months.
We've wanted to do it, right?
But tonight's our night off.
And we're watching fucking, you know what I mean?
A movie.
We're watching Barbarian.
Apocalypse.
Whatever.
Apocalypse again.
We're watching Apocalypse again.
For the fifth time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right?
And then, you know, we're cuddling.
OK.
Right?
And you're like, oh, bro, look at the goat.
That's you, by the way.
That's you.
Oh, that's me.
Oh, OK.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
They're going to sacrifice the goat again.
Yeah.
Whatever.
Yes.
Right?
Yeah.
Right?
I get scared during this part, you say, right?
So I go, hey, dude, just come on closer.
If you get scared with the goat, sacrifice.
Right?
You get closer, right?
And then when the goat, the sacrifice happens,
you kind of do both the lunge, right?
Yeah.
And your hand lunges under my dick, right?
Yeah.
And then we lock eyes.
Oh.
And we start making out, and then it happens, you know?
That's the journey.
That's the journey.
That's the destination.
That's the destination.
That's point 8.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
My question for sister would be my question.
You don't want to stand, brother?
No, no, no, it's just hypothetical.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sister.
Yeah, yeah, strictly hypothetical.
Oh, of course.
Yeah, yeah, fuck, yeah.
Come on.
Anyway.
OK, your question.
What's your question?
My question to her would be, what does her yard look like?
Like, and I'm not talking, I'm just
seeing what is going to go out into the yard
and do some yard work.
Oh, to try to seduce him.
To look away.
Wow.
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.
The trapper technique.
I mean, we're trying to go back to 80s, you know what I'm saying?
Right, that's great.
Yeah.
That's pretty cool.
Right, you know when he's done work,
you know when he's coming back from the store, you just jump out.
How do you know that?
Know what?
You know his schedule?
You know your neighbor's schedule.
I mean, if it was me, you would not know.
Yeah, because you don't have like a regular job.
That's exactly what I'm saying.
So I don't know who the guy is.
But I would know that you don't have a normal schedule.
Right, so that you would never go out there then.
So my yard would never be back there.
My yard would be fucked up if I lived next to you for sure.
For sure.
Right, right.
But assuming this guy isn't doing the bobby things,
she should just get on the yard, snip some hedges.
Right, and then you do it in your bathing suit.
Pretty much, yeah.
Right, right.
You bend over a lot.
Yeah, snip, snip, snip.
Exactly.
Right, right.
Also, maybe worth noting, and I'm not trying to be a naysayer here.
But like, what are you naysaying?
I just don't.
I think if he wanted to, he kind of would.
Yeah.
So because guys, that's not true.
Oh, for real?
That's not true.
Because if he's like me, I wouldn't want it every day.
No, no, no, no, no.
Some guys, even if they want to fuck every day,
they don't do it.
Why?
What's the reason?
Because it's like they have the same philosophy as I do.
They're jaded to it.
You know what I mean?
It's not there's too busy.
There's other things that got going on.
You know what I mean?
It sucks energy.
That's what I realized.
It sucks energy.
And it's like, I like to focus my energy on other things.
You know what I mean?
It's not because I want to fuck all the time, right?
I do, I'm a fuck machine, right?
You are.
But I don't want to turn the machine on every time.
It requires a lot of gasoline.
And not only that, exactly.
And it's also, that's very good, you know what I mean?
And also, I just want, you know what I mean?
It to be special when it happens.
Even if it's just a casual hookup,
you want it to be special?
Yeah.
That's sweet.
I would agree with that.
Yeah, because it's all a life experience.
They're like snapshots.
You know what I mean?
I'm taking little photos of my life.
And I'm staring at them in my album.
And at the end of my life, I just go through the album.
That's one hell of a booklet you have.
Thank you.
You have a very thick book of pictures.
And that's what life is.
Don't you think?
Yeah.
Babe?
Don't call me babe.
What would you call me?
What are you so angry about?
No, I'm just saying.
You went from talking about having
these magical snapshots of sexual experiences with women.
And then you go, babe?
Yeah.
Just a little confusing for my mental.
You've had a lot of snapshots in my fucking book.
Take up chapters now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do you remember what my pussy looks like?
Yeah.
Is there a snapshot of that in your head?
It's AOK all the day.
I love that line.
Classic line.
That's merch.
That's a merch.
I just made that up.
AOK all the day.
AOK all the day.
All the day.
That makes no sense.
Anyway, I just say things.
What else?
Do you have anything else?
There's this one question.
OK, go ahead.
Is this yours?
Oh, yeah.
You got some gifts, bro.
Dude, really?
I didn't know you're a Toyota fan.
Yeah, sponsored by Tula.
I am.
What is it?
Tell us what this is.
Let me see it.
T-shirts.
Fuck, T-shirts.
I love it.
T-shirts.
Please open that one up.
And they probably short.
This one says medium.
Oh my god.
Oh, this is that fucking thing.
Yes!
Calipana.
Calipana.
How'd you get these?
I got so my friend guys make them so.
Really?
Yeah.
Fuck, yeah, dude.
I never know the whole team was going to.
It's all good.
It's OK, I'll just grab one of them.
Yeah.
Calipana.
Thank you so much.
I have nothing for you.
Automatic.
How about you this?
How about you before we leave?
You just tell him one more band.
He has to know the history of music.
I've been brushing up.
That's why, honestly, I have.
I've gotten shit, bro.
For people that didn't listen to Queen,
he didn't know who Queen was.
My dad was a little mad that I didn't know Queen, honestly.
Are you really?
Well, I think, you know, because I'm going to see you again.
So let's go with something that's, I really,
just something that you should know,
I think, is probably the Rolling Stones.
You know Rolling Stones?
The Rolling Stones, like that's the band.
Yeah.
Why did you say it that way?
Have you ever heard of the name like Mick Jagger?
Mick Jagger, yeah, moves like Mick Jagger, you know.
Yeah, OK, so that was a Maroon 5 song.
That's based off of a Maroon 5 song.
But when he's saying, when Adam Levine says,
moves like Mick Jagger, yeah, moves like Jagger,
Jagger is Mick Jagger from the Rolling Stones.
And he was very infamous for kind of having
this very, like, sexual moving.
So Rolling Stones, a magazine made from the band, or?
Ooh, that's a good question.
Is that because they both came around at the same time.
OK, because my thing of the Rolling Stones
is was just the magazine, you know.
There was a band called the Rolling Stones,
and they're considered one of the biggest bands of all time.
OK.
They have such classic songs like Satisfaction.
OK.
Jumping Jack Flash.
Sing Satisfaction, you probably know it.
I know how it goes.
I just thought, I can't get no satisfaction.
I try.
And I try.
And I try.
And I try.
I can't get no satisfaction.
Do you know it?
Yeah, I just knew that last run.
I know, but it's familiar to you?
A little bit, yeah.
OK.
How about, wait, what's a more famous?
Jumping Jack Flash, Sympathy for the Devil.
I mean, Satisfaction is like.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, I know, Wild Horses.
That's a little hard to sing.
Really, yeah, it's hard.
How about Beast of Burden?
I'll never be your beast of burden.
No.
OK.
Now you have something to learn.
Yeah, yeah, I guess I.
And now, you know, because your friends are watching right now,
I'm learning not to get angry.
I really am.
You've done a great job.
Please, no touch.
Hey, what I'm saying is that it really is bizarre,
but I love it.
And I think that's what we're together.
We have to teach you some things.
Yeah.
So we learned what the Beatles last time, right?
Yeah.
Give me the four Beatles again.
Remember the Beatles songs we played for you after the podcast?
Gosh.
Something road.
No.
What road?
If you say Rocky Road, I'm going to leave the road.
It's an ice cream.
He almost said it.
He almost said Rocky Road.
No, I was going to say.
Oh, no.
It's a name of a girl, isn't it?
Exactly.
Starts with a name.
Come on.
Abby Road.
Yes.
Abby Road.
Abby Road.
It's an album.
It's not a song.
It's a whole album, OK?
It's a whole album.
Nice.
Yeah.
Very good.
But can you name any of the Beatles again?
No, they'll name the members of the band.
The name?
Of the Beatles.
We didn't go over the names.
You did research after?
Yeah.
It's your fault.
Hey, it's my fault.
Or it's my fault.
You're enabling.
I'm the one that's wrong.
You're enabling.
I'm enabling, right.
So if I asked you, who are the Beatles, you wouldn't know.
You've never heard of John Paul, George, and Ringo?
Not.
I mean, that's a thing like that.
And that's not disrespect.
That's just like, I don't know.
OK, so the lead singer was John Paul.
There's two.
No, not John Paul.
He's not a pope.
John Paul.
You're a classic John Paul.
John Paul the Pope.
Thank goodness he is.
Thank goodness he is.
No, no, no.
John Lennon.
John Lennon, OK.
Paul McCartney.
McCartney.
You've heard of Paul McCartney?
Why does that sound more like in sync or Jesse McCartney?
That's why it's different.
Yeah.
That's why.
Oh, my.
Regenerate.
Related.
Related.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're about to piss him off, dude.
No, you're not.
I love him.
Yeah.
Paul McCartney.
Yeah.
John Lennon.
John Lennon.
I don't think they're related, though.
Yeah, I don't.
I haven't really.
George Harrison, those are the four.
OK.
Yeah, and then they all, the main two songwriters
were Paul and John.
OK.
But George wrote probably four of really classic songs
that they had done.
He died, but so.
And the Rolling Stones, maybe do some Richard on that.
You know what I mean?
That'd be cool.
Have you ever heard of a woman named Yoko Ono?
Yoko Ono.
Yeah, she was.
Wait, wait.
You can't just repeat it.
That's what I noticed what he does.
He's good at that.
He's so good.
If he doesn't know anything, he repeats it as if he knows it.
Let's try.
Have you ever heard?
And he thinks we're going to move on.
Hey, Bobby.
So ask me about something that I wouldn't know.
Bobby, have you heard of Yoko Ono?
No, give me something else.
Something that you know that I know nothing about.
Oh, do you know this favorite architect?
My favorite architect, his name is Charles Harrison.
Charles Harrison.
Oh, we should move on.
Yes, see what I'm saying?
That's what he does.
Right?
So it's like, oh, yeah, I know.
He does not.
You know what's interesting?
What?
We've moved on a bunch.
I know.
No, I know.
I know.
No, bro, bro.
You know what's interesting?
I know.
I know we have, right?
We've moved on stuff.
Yeah, we've voted so many times we've moved on, right?
That I've taken those cues and went, oh, he has no idea
where we're at.
Yeah, I mean, and he doesn't know where we're at.
Yeah, you know what's even more interesting is when people
don't just like outside in real life, like in real life,
like, how much can we get away with?
Right.
And I get away with just a bunch of doing that.
Oh, the kind.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, you just say the kind.
You do it, practice.
See, you always do it.
The kind?
Yeah.
That's why you just say it.
Oh, yeah, the kind.
Oh, yeah, the kind.
Yeah.
What does that supposed to mean?
So it's like, oh, you know the restaurant,
the two choice with?
Oh, yeah, the kind.
Uh-huh, perfect.
Yeah, you don't have to know.
Exactly.
But what does the kind mean?
Oh, yeah, I do know.
The kind is almost like pinpointing, like, oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
Oh, the kind.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
Yeah.
What do you like to get there?
What have they asked that?
What is that?
You can say same answer.
Oh, yeah, the kind.
You know, oh, you know, the kind.
Yeah, you know the kind.
Oh, yeah, the kind.
No, no, no, no, I don't know, because I like to get one thing.
But what do you get at that restaurant?
Probably just, you know, a little bit of this,
a little bit of that.
That's so good.
I did see, I need to learn from it, that's so good, dude.
A little bit of this, a little bit of that.
I love it, you know what I mean?
That's great.
So I love your little lingoes, dude.
They work.
Oh, they do.
They get you far.
They get you far in life.
Yeah, in here.
Yeah, in here, yeah.
But not to the end.
It's true.
Right.
That's why.
It will get you to the end.
Thank you.
Because now I know your tricks.
Yeah.
Right.
And I know your little lingoes, right?
So we're going to make you do some work here, baby.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I had to give it back.
Oh wait, this is before we end.
So apparently there are people who are winkers and non-winkers.
There are people who look good winking
and who can get away with it and people who
don't look good winking.
What do you think you are?
I'm good at it.
Let me see, try.
Oh yeah, you're good.
What?
I don't see it.
Yeah, it's very like, it's like I'm an arrogant.
When you said like, we're going to learn here, baby,
and then you winked, it was really good.
Yeah, it's good.
Be a winker.
No.
No, really wink.
Yeah.
Really.
Yeah, that's good.
That's good.
Yeah, you just give it.
Wink.
Guilt.
Oh wait, that was really fast.
Yeah, do it again.
Do it again.
Oh no.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit, I want to pull my dick out.
Go ahead, Koli.
I know, I'm not.
Try it.
She's been doing the whole podcast.
Oh, that was really good.
That's good.
They call me Blink 182.
I'm constantly blinking.
Oh yeah, yeah.
I don't need to wink one more time.
Blink George.
Yeah, very good.
We all can blink.
Is there anyone that can't?
Janna.
Janna.
Blink, there we go.
Oh, that was real like, that was a twitch, a promotion.
That was a twitch, a clicker.
That was the beginning of a seizure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That was weird.
But anyway, there's a lot of, how about whistle?
I can whistle.
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
Wait.
Oh, you like me.
I don't know.
I've never known how to whistle.
Only dogs can hear that.
It's such a high pitch.
Go ahead.
Do it.
Go a little bit.
That's bad.
Pretty good.
Very good.
Wow.
Wink and whistle.
Can you gleeke?
What's the gleeke?
On command?
Oh, accidentally I can.
I can gleeke.
What's the gleeke?
Let me see.
What is that?
It's from your salivate.
Oh, you can't on command.
Oh, you shoot out.
Oh!
Gleeke City, dude.
It's like a squirt.
Gleeke, gleeke, gleeke.
You can't gleeke.
What are you pushing?
I don't know.
Oh my god, you're both squirters.
Yeah, we're squirters.
Can you gleeke?
I can't.
Yeah, you can't gleeke.
No, you're blocking it.
That's why.
Why, let me see.
The gland is.
There's a gland down there.
What are you pushing?
You're pushing this on the top of your root.
Kind of.
Yeah.
Whoa, that's while your tongue.
Whoa!
You're doing it wrong.
So you can't.
So we can gleeke, you can't gleeke.
Yeah, you guys are squirters.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You guys are true squirters, bro.
Can you gleeke?
No, OK.
I used to show off in elementary.
I was like, what, one thing I could.
You know, in elementary, you have like a weird thing.
Yeah, that was my thing, too.
Did you used to flip your eyelids?
Oh, I would.
Pink eye all day.
Can you roll your tongue?
Can you roll your arms?
Not really.
I can't either.
Rojas.
Rojas.
You can't?
I can't do it.
Rojas.
Rojas.
Ro.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.
Rojas.
Barely.
A little bit.
Rojas.
It's like a Japanese ghost.
Say Danny, say Danny Rojas.
Danny Rojas.
I heard Rojas.
I'm doing it through the throat.
Yeah, I heard it.
Yeah, I've been tricking it, right?
Danny Rojas.
A little bit.
Rojas, dude.
That's a big trick.
All right, thanks, everybody.
Love you guys.
Mahalos.
Zeira, give me your handles.
At How's This Guy, and I just started
with a new podcast.
If you guys want to tune in, please, How's This Podcast.
Would Bobby be invited to your podcast?
100%.
You guys all are.
Do you do it with your daddy?
He can be there, but usually it's just me or me or my co-host.
If Bobby were to do it, you think he'd get jumped?
No.
If it was just me and him, it'd be cherry.
Bobby, you hear that?
Oh, shit.
We're taking the headphones off.
Yeah, I think we're good.
Kevin.
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