TigerBelly - Theo Von is a Filipino's Favorite White Guy

Episode Date: March 13, 2024

Theo Von returns to TigerBelly for a record 7th time! We chat 'pheromones baby', old dads, Theo's new number, Gilroy, bok choy circuit, dark foot, and Pearl Harbor vibes. Buy Tickets to our next TigerBelly Live Show. Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners! Go to www.helixsleep.com/belly and use code HELIXPARTNER20. This is their best offer yet and it won’t last long! With Helix, better sleep starts now. Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at www.shopify.com/tigerbelly ALL LOWERCASE. Go to www.shopify.com/tigerbelly now to grow your business–no matter what stage you’re in. Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to www.rocketmoney.com/belly That’s www.rocketmoney.com/belly. RocketMoney dot com slash BELLY. Go to www.zocdoc.com/belly and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. That's www.zocdoc.com/belly  

Aloha Mahalo. We are gonna play Honolulu Hawaii. Woo! Gilbert's the most excited about this. That's why he's excited. Friday, April 26th, 2024. Yay! Doors 7 p.m. Show starts at 8. You guys, you know, we've been wanting to play Hawaii for so long,

and now it's happening. April 26th. Yeah Kalala where can we get our tickets? You guys can go get tickets at tigerbellylive.com. This is gonna be a great show We don't do this often so get go get your tickets now, and we'll see you there My face is pretty pure right now dude. It's quite good. There's not a lot of clogs. Yeah, yeah, it's pretty good.

I haven't had a boil in years. No you had a boil recently. Oh yeah. But me and my sister are allowed, you know? Years. Yeah, that's crazy. I meant days. I meant days.

You always get nose boils. No, no, no, but not on my head is what I meant. Oh, that's right. You used to nose boils. No, no, no, but not on my head is what I meant. Oh, that's right. You used to get those. I used to get those gigantic baseball boils on my head. And to pop them, it just takes a whole thing. But I haven't had those in years. But I also wash my head every other night now.

Yeah, thank God. There used to be a time when that wasn't the case and I just thought to myself Yeah, what a Shameful Asian. I'm not shameful as you let me obviously something what throws you off. I'll tell you what throws me off with Women you okay? No, I just had a sigh bowl and I had kumpau chicken. Oh at the same time so my body's going What's going on Brazil or China?

Big one pick one um panda Yeah, panda, and then I went to um, I walk here's I love panda panda to come pouch chicken at panda. No panda everything and everything be born chicken orange chicken No, I don't know. It's kind of chicken He gets a Beijing I get Beijing. Let me see can I talk what's going on? Yes, please you want to discover more about my kind of Because your face is kind of is very clear. So I'm trying to figure out what you're eating I know you're smoking. I'll tell you his order. No, we're talking about what are we talking about the pores on my skin the panda or What I discovered about girls. Oh what you discovered about or your gripe is a gripe or discovery. I want to hear about the girls

Okay, so here's what throws me off kissing a gripe or discovery? I want to hear about the girls. Okay, so here's what throws me off. Kissing. Oh my god. How do you know what he's talking about? I heard of it. You know, sometimes, you know, sometimes, you know, it's like, you know, thumb wrestling. Yeah, you know, you're not supposed to do that with your tongues either, though. You know what I mean? Like there shouldn't be a battle. There shouldn't be a battle in the mouth. It should be a dance. It should be a dance. It should be like soft and like sweet. This one girl did helicopter. Oh good.

And then she went in the sky. It was crazy. No, she didn't. Good and glad. That's a lie. That's a lie. That's a lie. That's a lie.

That's a lie. I'm so glad you did that because you do that. I don't kiss that way. That's exactly how you kiss. No, I don't. Mike, dude, my kiss. Be honest and show us right now. You changed.

Oh yeah. Show us right now. Tell me how you've changed. I'm so jealous So I um, so breath is a big one too. Absolutely. Oh my god a hundred Situations were tough. Oh, that's a my one be oh, I don't armpit be oh, that's fine in the pussy. That's not that's not That's not that's not it's not it My penis smells like fungi? Yeah, yeah. My fungi is just regular BO.

Everyone relax. In the bed? I'm just saying, look, like from the moment I get out of the shower and I put my cute little panties on and I walk around the house, I'm, that cave is going to build up some things. Oh, okay. That little cute little cave is going to have things in it. And it's going to smell like me.

Yours is not a cave, it's a cavern. It's like a whatever, a cavern. Cute little cavern. We're saber-toothed cats, but I don't care. It's a volcanic crater. But. And don't you ever forget it. But it's going to.

I'm going to emit my natural scent. Here's another one, my gripe. You guys just don't like pussy. I don't think I think you're You guys just started new podcast I think you and Gilbert should start a new podcast called the closet Closet what okay? Oh, I wasn't I don't like be open in the pussy pussy he's the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of town man. Get the fuck out of here. Those are Fairmonts baby.

Thank you George. Yeah, but they were pretty sad. Those are Fairmonts baby. Oh, no bird. Oh my. Cause you can't lean forward and say that. I know dude. Did I lean back and say that?

It's the Fairmonts baby. Start a podcast called It's the Fairmonts baby. Wow dude. We'll be in direct competition. That's what he's down there. He takes a kiss and goes, It's the Fairbubble, baby! And she's like, shut the fuck up. Why do you keep saying that every time you eat my pussy?

I get it, relax. It's super. But first gotta say something. I know, I wanna say, bro, that's the most insane thing you've ever said. That's going to make me laugh all day long. Thank you so much for that. That was so dumb. I think we need a t-shirt.

Yeah. It's the pheromones baby. The pheromones baby. Anyway. So that and... So you don't, both of you don't like the smell of pussy. What else? Okay.

Fine. What else? Okay fine. Keep going. What else? And then There's this one girl who doesn't wear any Perfume which is fine, but there's a musky sort of you know mothbally smell Okay, the mothballs. I don't like because you're what is well first of all That's a mothball beyond. Yeah. Yeah, I know the smell of mothballs whatever is in a mothball so mothball is something that we would put in our closets or cabinets where it was like, you know, when moldy stuff would accumulate.

But I think the origin of mothballs is cause they would like chew holes into your garments, right? Moths? Yeah. Actual moths. Yeah, moths. Like in Asia at least. Like we, that's why we use mothballs. Yeah, but there's a certain smell that it carries and when I smell it on a woman It just throws me off that's like she's wearing like old people's clothing or something

Yeah, because it reminds us of like our grandparents. Yeah, I don't like yeah, especially if you're Asian It's like a grandparent smell. Hmm. Our smells affordable What does that mean? What are you asking? What are you talking about? What are we doing? Are smells affordable? I don't know what it means, but it feels like something. So please explain. No, I'm just saying, are perfumes and stuff affordable? Oh, what are you talking about? You said smell. Yeah, sense. What's the smells not good? No, I don't know if like you can sell smell. Okay. Well, our sense affordable.

Like you can go to like CVS or Walgreens and get like knockoff Yeah, perfumes, and I can't really tell the difference. Can you so you're a perfume guy? You're somebody who likes perfume on I like a smell I need a smell because like a guy like Rick Glassman thinks it's the most appalling most like intrusive thing if a woman Has a perfume on because he likes European women. They don't do that. We're like French women has a perfume on. Because he likes European women. They don't do that.

Well, like French women. But I think that they do. Where? I mean, are you all right? OK, I don't get it right. I mean, OK. I don't love like dudes who wear super heavy cologne that doesn't that I don't love acts even. But with Bobby, I always liked it on him because he's just he would pick the weirdest.

That's what I'm saying. Pick a set, man. Yeah. So I do. Bobby, I always liked it on him because he's just, he would pick the weirdest moment. That's what I'm saying. Pick a set, man. Yeah, so I would be, I think now at this age, a little turned off if a guy was still wearing like Aguadagio or something like that. Do you guys want to see the 20 countries with the worst body order according to-

But let me do my last gripe and then we'll do it. Okay, I don't want to put it up. Okay, go ahead. Here's my last gripe. Dirty fingernails. Like dirt in the fingernails. What was that? Was she a gardener?

Because I was watching The Walking Dead. I've been watching the walking dead. Yeah, in a post-apocalyptic environment. Yes, you can have dirty fingernails. And honestly, it looks kinda hot still, so I don't. Yeah, in that environment, yeah, I'm sure, okay. You know, that's fine. Okay, but if you're a coal miner, and you work in it in the coal mines

That's one thing okay, but if you're out and about you're at like a fancy restaurant or something you have dirty fingernails It's weird. What if she's like a hot chick farmer? And she's just coming straight from the farm to no boo because think of the hottest girl, you know that old saying dirty finger name it right you had me at the edge of my seat I was ready to receive your wisdom and you just bump oh let me get that over with I'm gonna lean forward again you know that's see what is it papa dirty fingernails means be old vagina orders a correlation there's a debt director There's a direct correlation.

I can't even speak right now. Direct correlation. Just don't roll your eyes, dude. Just know that there's a direct correlation. There's a direct correlation between those two things, okay? And you guys can make fun of my language. I like it. And I can't pronounce words all you want.

Can we get a hot key with a, it's pheromones, baby? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's pheromones, baby! Yeah, yeah, yeah, please get a hot key. I'll make one, yeah. Make one for, it's Faramones baby. It's Faramones baby. Yeah, yeah, please get a hotkey. I'll make one, yeah. Make one for, it's Faramones baby. That's our, very good then. Oh my God.

Wait, so like what, how do you want a pussy to smell? Because I feel like pussy should smell like pussy. No. It should smell like what, soap? No. It doesn't even smell like soap. It should smell bad. It should smells.

What's bad to you guys? Cause like, can I just be honest? Like I'll be very, very honest with you. Sometimes of the month I feel like, wow, like I have a very attractive natural pussy scent. And sometimes it, I don't. And I feel like that's normal. It's not like I'm dirty.

I'm not saying it's abnormal. I'm not saying that you should go to prison for it You know, I'm not saying any harsh consequences for it. Yeah, I'm just gonna stop eating it That's the only consequence. Have I ever had like a bad sense never ever Yours is you should bottle yours. Okay, then you It's the perfect scent. Then you like regular pussy smell then. That's not what I'm talking about. You're not getting what I'm saying. He's saying there's nothing worse. I'm talking about like Venus Williams, US Open.

Oh, gosh. Right? And then her vagina smells like her armpit. Four cents. Wait, that, a lot of guys like that. Yeah. Look at George. And that guy's name is Brendan Chopp.

No, look at him. No, don't coverbunker this, dude. You don't know anything about it, dude. I don't want to even talk about stuff like that. Why did we always talk about match smells and lots of it? I didn't want to even talk about it. I was just giving you my gripes. A very close friend of ours says that one of the things she loves most about her partner

and why she's so sexually free with him is because she'll take like a six-hour flight to New York, not shower, be like the gross, go to the gym, come home and he's like craving her, like every inch of her. Like I said on the last episode, I said it's one of those things where he's upgraded. What do you mean? Like he thinks he's, what did I say last time where you have to be with a partner that you feel like you're on? Oh, you out of her league. Out of her league. Out of her league. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's what it is. She's out of his league.

So a little BL, a little blood, you know what I mean? He's gonna go through that. Cantal. Yeah, yeah, but it's like, if you're downgrading and you smell pit, smell, and a little blood, it's just, it's not good. I think if you don't like the person, if you're not in love. I hate them like hate them hate them like you're Hitler. No, it's like you, you know J walk

Kind of hate So stupid So dumb You know that's too harsh. That was harsh, but no take it what? Walk it was hard. I do that was harsh. Yeah, what? Take it off. Take it off. J-Walkie was harsh. That was harsh? Yeah. That kind of hate though, you know what I mean?

You know what I mean? Or you, you know, what's another like, you'd be mad at somebody, but it's not that bad. You know what I mean? Minor offense? Like a minor offense. Like you, you cheated. I might test at school on me.

Dude, dude, I'm good today. You're on fire. I'm on fire today. You ever cheat in school? No. What? I have. I have never.

Me too. All the time. No. But I would, you know, I was one of those guys, you know, when you had to fill in the bubbles, I would make a design. Same. Like he's a dragon or whatever. Yeah.

But anyway, I hated like the image. I would always tell you like,. Like he's a dragon or whatever. Yeah. But anyway, um... I hated like the image I would always tell you like if you if you filled in all seas on your Scantron that you would get a passing grade and that was such bullshit. Like you did all seas one day? No, I would never. I'd always get A's. I was a good student.

Oh. Nerd alert. Yeah. Nerd alert. I mean not in high school, no, but in college. Yeah, I was a good student. Um, yeah, I'm so glad I don't have to ever do that again school Right aren't you glad we're out of school? Sometimes I have nightmares of being stuck

like finals week or something and then back in like my physics like three class and Feeling like the whole like world is on my shoulders because I'm not going to pass this thing. I forgot everything. Why do you even worry about shit like that? Because it's a reoccurring nightmare of mine. No, but back then you worried about Tesla stuff? Oh yeah.

Did you? Yeah, because my parents had beat me. I got ready for the beating, so. Oh, so you accepted it. Oh, I knew that every report card time I was gonna get a beating because I would work out, right? And I would intense my body, but I knew all Fs, when you get like Ds and Fs, and you give them to your traditional Asian parents, holy shit, the whooping you get. My lord. It's not fun. I was like Cersei walking

through the city, you know, the town. Shame. Shame. It was not fun. I was like Cersei walking through the city, you know, the town. Shave. Shave. It was like that. It was terrible. But yeah, I never even tried. But here's the bad thing about school. Waking up. I mean, God, Lee, gee, change the time. I agree. To me, to me, that's the hardest part of school. No, I actually don't disagree at all. The hardest part of my entire college existence, high school elementary was waking up in the morning. If school was from one to nine, I would get straight A's. I think you would. One to nine.

One to nine P. No, but that's not true, because then you'd sleep at like six in the morning and start to wake up at noon. No, I wouldn't, no, I wouldn't. No, I wouldn't. Yeah, because like 7 a.m. classes I remember, I was like, who decided this?

This is obnoxious. Well, sometimes I would wake up and it's still kind of dark. Yeah. And I would look outside, and I would go, I'm going to kill myself. I hate this. And then you show up. I don't know what the fucking teacher's talking about.

Mr. Guilfoyle. And then he had this, always this wet stain on the tip of his he had these like Cacky pants and there was always like a wet like he peed himself. Oh, I was just looking mr. Guilfoyle It was like wet stain. What was it? No Peter either come or pee. I don't know what it was He had this mustache. He was also had a mr. Magoo snows. Yeah, wow class mom So anyway, you know the biophysics would deal within each domain creates and I'm like, Oh, wait, talk about me like that.

Was there never a teacher in school where you were like, Oh, I really, really like them. You went out of the same way with the way I'm like feeling this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys are naming everything I loved in school. Oh, stop waking up early. Yeah, waking up early, concentrating on one thing for a long time, getting tested on it, being able to remember things that you studied.

I'm like wishing I could have something like that in my life again. I think, did it take you out of maybe your religious upbringing? No, I enjoyed, that was like elite performing. It's like, yeah, figuring out what you do. I tell you this. Really?

Yeah, I tell you, I'm not like that. I want to take the L side, it's just for fun to see if I score better than my friends. I'm a dreamer. Yeah. And a drifter. It's Helix Sleep! You guys, I have many couple rooms in my house and they have beds at every bed I have in

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behind Allbirds, Rothes and Brooklyn and millions of other entrepreneurs of every size across 175 countries because businesses that grow, grow with Shopify. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly. All lowercase, go to Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly. Now to grow your business, no matter what stage you're in. Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly. Chicken again, baby. What's a battle going on the battle going on my stomach, but I'm so full right now But anyway, you shut the fuck up now. Okay? We are we are we doing I love it man. I love kidding. You know what dude? I'm so sorry that was rude

Now don't give me that I do the pheromone baby. I love it Good line dude. And what I'm saying is is that keep going? That's what all I want. What's you're saying? Aren't we doing Hawaii soon? Yeah, we're gonna play gonna play in June yeah April I can't wait soft soft announcement wait it's an April April 26 finally gonna happen you know I mean finally gonna happen guys you know Von around as the of untexted for the years are guest he's our guest he's how many times he canceled the past three or four times I just have to start like booking him about six months before we actually want him on because it's like takes a while Here's here's it here's because this is what the deal is with him

He always like man if I do yours you do mine, right? But I always do his first and then he takes off So I have to do he has to do ours first bamboozles. Yeah And I think our numbers do well, so he kind of still needs to use me, you know? Yeah. But he's elevated himself into a different stratosphere. Yeah. Before he comes on, what do you think is different about him

or things you've noticed? Oh, a lot. That's smart. Oh, a lot. He's, I mean, he's my friend and I love him, but. Yeah, you gotta talk to him anyways. He's so busy that you can't really get a whole of him. He doesn't call as much. But you just kind of, you know, you hear how he's doing through the folklore.

The folklore and the stories that people tell. And it's really nice to hear all that stuff. I'm not doing bad myself though, you know. You can't, you can't, you got some folklore. The weirdest thing about you is that now that you've hit this level of success and fame, you are far more reachable, like you answer text messages, like you've never been more... I would agree to that. Right? Like you're so much more accessible. It's not, it's not the success, I'll tell you that. accessible it's not it was it's not the success I'll

tell you that but it's court the court no the correlations when medication no when I went through that hard time last year and I thought everything was going away the people that stuck by me which which is pretty much everyone, I had a deeper appreciation for it. And that's what it was. I'm like, you know what, these people have my back. They love me and I love them and I should be more present. I've been nicer to you.

Have I not been? Have I not been? Yes, you have. Yeah. And are you appreciative of it? Very much so, sir. yeah, and are you appreciative of it very much so sir one appreciate your friendship I Appreciate yours as well. Thank you. But you know years always but Even with Andrew. I'm very appreciative and I

You know You realize that You can't do this thing on your own You realize that you can't do this thing on your own. Anything. Not this way. Especially in this business. You can't do it alone. And I hate to say this, I don't wanna call anybody out, but I might not say his name, but I might.

Yo, I will. You know, I'll start a war. Okay. Okay. So the other night, me and Andrew are doing a show at the comedy store Mm-hmm and one of those older guys from the days past who was a huge star back when I was a In high school middle school. I knew who he was he came in and You know at the comedy street in 15 minutes, you know, I we talked about this all the time about bumping this and that

This was he was on the lineup. And it was 42 minutes. Wow. Oh my God. And then so the second show started so late, and that's the show of me and Andrew. So me and Andrew showed up. And I was supposed to go up at like 11 or something.

It's like 11.50, and the beginning guys were just starting. It was like, we were there late. And it was because this one fella and I want to and I'm he's also So stand up, you know what it is. So I'm gonna tell you who this yeah, and I love his son by the way. Okay. I'm ready. Let's do I already know who So You know did 42 minutes and you know, he doesn't hang out He's like our senior but our senior hall will still make sure he says hi to every single person on the show and

Do like a couple of lines, you know I mean and he's so Charming yeah, you know and he's so likeable. I mean dude. I'm telling you that dude is so likable. I mean, dude, I'm telling you, that dude is such a sweet guy. And I, I'm a big, I've always been a big fan. When I saw Harlem Knights and Coming to America, I mean, Arthur J. Hall killed it in those movies. Was he in Harlem Knights? I'm sure he was. But, but the only one in this room, I feel like would know. So but anyway, but you know, he doesn't really see how to people he kind of does it and fucks up the show and What I want to say is there is a vast segment of these Hollywood types

You know me who do this podcast as a favor to me because I asked They don't want to do it. They don't know what it is. They don't know the reach it has. They just do it because it's like he's been calling asking me for a year, right? Then when they do it, you know what I mean? They realize all people did listen to it. And I think that's the problem. There's a disconnect. Oh, thank you guys. I'm sorry that I'm late. It's alright, Tee-Tee, you know? My little Tee-Tee's in town, man. I love your Aloha shirt. Oh, thank you very much. You're in Hawaii? You look like a nice tan. You got a nice tan? Huh? No, this is a... What is it called? Pearl Harbor set up?

Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I love your Pearl Harbor set up man. Makes me want to fucking fly into you you know. I just want to go. Pushing crash right into you. What was that song they had? It was like Crash. Dave Matthews? Yeah.

What do you mean? Dave Matthews. Yeah. Crash? Crash. Crash. Crash. Crash. Crash. Crash. Crash in the knee, buddy. Hey, buddy.

Dude, when I was young, my dad, he lived by like a... I don't want to say like a... I guess it was like kind of like an Asian guy or whatever. You could say that. Okay. If he was Asian, you could say it. Okay, yeah, yeah. Sure say that.

He would sing, the guy was like you can say it okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He would sing the guy was like Fresh off the bottom or whatever. Yeah, and he would bottom of the boat There's probably different layers of the boat you bond the bottom of the boat. Oh, I don't know where you Fresh off the bottom like it's bottom of the sea. I don't know He I don't know a ton. Well, I do here's remember with the guy. He would sing to his child, right? But he had a, he would sing that song. It was like,

a hush little baby thought you were daddy gonna buy you broken amulet. Like he would always have to work on. Oh, different. Yeah. And he would sing to his son, but he had the wording wrong. Yeah, well, that's like one of my jokes when I say my dad would sing Christmas songs.

Well, he would. He'd just go, Frosty, you're a good guy. You know what I say, Frosty's a good guy. And I go, snow man, he's like, I don't know snow. Or something like that. Anyway. Yeah, daddy gonna buy you a walking mind and time. Yeah, how old would your dad, how old would he have been?

Today? Today. Let me think about that. Cause my dad this year would have been a hundred. Dang. And I know you had an old daddy too, right? Your dad would have been a hundred? A hundred, yeah. So he was 1924, so he lived through the depression,

World War II. Slavery. Jim Crow. Oh, wowlavery. Jim Crow. Wow. Whoa. Jim Crow, huh? You ever met him? Good guy.

No. Good guy. Good guy. Is he a good guy? I don't know. I don't follow him on Instagram. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, does Jim Crow have an Instagram?

Bring that up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sure there's a Jim Crow. Yeah. My dad would be, let, yeah, does Jim Crow have an Instagram bring that out? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure there's a Jim Crow Yeah, um my dad would be let me see was born in 19 1912 he 112 112 Wow 112 years old 112 years old that's insane. Yeah, wow years old. That's insane. Yeah. Wow. Daddy gonna buy you a nice dick man. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know? But it was just crazy hearing this guy, this Asian guy. You didn't do it, but when you first sang it, I'm bad, my bad. You didn't really do an Asian accent when you did it. You didn't feel Asian. Yeah, yeah. Oh, little... There we go, there we go, there we go, there we go. Don't do it, girl. Yeah, yeah, there we go, there we go, there we go. Don't do it, girl. Yeah, yeah, there we go, there we go. That sounds Filipino.

This sounds very Filipino. Yeah, very Filipino. Ready to go to buy you a broken window. Like I just had the words wrong. Yeah, yeah. You know that you're like, Filipino's new Steven Segal. Oh my God, people love you in the film.

Yeah, so in the Philippines, like growing up, like Steven Segal was like our favorite white guy. Yeah. Really, really why? Because I have no idea. I think action movies But now your Filipinos like favorite white guy because of your clip saying you love Filipinos. I love him man. I wish that I do man. I wish God made more of him. How many are there? 150 million around the world He did too much they got

40 million too much I think they got a disperse more of them I think in a like different area like they should airdrop a minute different area like where like I know Cleveland Tampa Bay, there's gonna be more in Tampa Bay Yeah, I have a bone to pick with you man. You do you do? Oh god. Is this about you guys catching Brendan online or something? Do with that nothing do it It has nothing to do with the internet as it has to do with you and I dude Has to do with you and I dog right really in our friendship, dude. Oh really? Yeah. Yeah, okay? So check this out. Yeah, okay? I get adamant dude. I get fucking emotional about this. Yeah, oh yeah.

The other, last week, bro. I'm gonna buy you a muscle relaxer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. So the other night, I wanna go back, dude. I'm gonna go, the other night, I meet a fine lady at the comedy store. Oh yeah. Okay.

You know what they are. They're nice. And we're talking, she's like, I got your comic, oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay. You know what they are. Mm-hmm. They're nice And we're talking she's like I got your comic. Oh, yeah, yeah, and she goes. I'm a big steel font von fan Oh, you know fuck with them, you know, she really you know him I Know yeah, I mean we some of our clips have begun viral and shit So I haven't seen them and I go well I can call him right now So I haven't seen them and I go well I can call them right now So I'm on speakerphone. I call one of the numbers This phone is disconnected

Call the other one no no no this phone is disconnected None of the numbers work and then I look at your name on it and it's green Which means it's disconnected. Yeah, right now. I'm thinking you have a new phone number, right? Yeah. Right, right, right. I guess what, bud? I don't want it. You don't?

No. Okay. I don't want it. Because to insult injury, to add insult to injury. Yeah. Add it up. The injured, right? Add it up. You don't shone.

All right. Yeah, I will add it up. Please. I'm listening to you it up young chung all right You're right dude, I wait I I know fleetwood but to check it out dude So then the next day I get a fucking text from young gravy Young gravy go I go hey, do you know it because yeah, I know that he knows you. I go, do you know that Theo changed his number? And young gravy goes, yeah, I got it. You want it? And I go, no, I don't.

I'll tell you why. Young gravy gets the number before Bobby Lee. Oh wow. What, is that true? No. Are you saying to me right now, wow, wow, okay? Fleetwood, you're here once and all right? Are you saying, I'm emotional right now, wow okay Fleetwood you're here one second all right I used to be emotional right now man right I just don't play stony with me poppy all

right just listen all right so check it out what you're saying to me now yes sir it to the world is that young gravy Matt Hari all right is a closer friend to you than me let's say it from your mouth, then. What I would say that is, overall, I would say that I started with the taller people in my phone. Ah. Ah, so. And so I will send it to you soon.

Yeah. No, you know what bud You're doing you know what it's so funny what you're doing dude. You're doing a half-smile open mouth Technique you do this Right and this sarcastic. Yeah, it's not real. Uh-huh and it's condescending. Okay, okay? So I'm gonna say this to you right now and to the world. I don't know how many people listen to this. I consider you a good friend of mine. Yeah.

I love you so much. I really, what? Hurry. No, I said, I love you. And I got it. Now you just did. I said it. Okay.

Right. And so if I'm being real, yeah, me too. If anyone, if you got in a car accident, right? And all of us your shoulder blade got damaged or you lost a fucking toad Situation lost a couple inches a cook. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. That's just a me were in the hospital I would be the number one guy in LA to frantically make phone calls go Tell me how what hospital isn't this lighted up, right? And then what though you just smoke outside of the hospital or whatever Yeah, but I'd be there dude. That's true. You'd hear me

You know me yeah gang gang outside dude, right? So when I'm saying gang gang right so what I'm saying to you is that I don't want it Yeah, I don't ever want it but one of you know and also that girl it made me look like fool really Yeah, I felt foolish. And she laughed at me. She goes, you don't have his number. Oh. And I go, you know what, lady?

He was right. Yeah, I thought. She wasn't lying. She was right. He sounds like an honest one. Yeah, she is right. So I was just wondering, so you went from tall to small. What are we getting there? We're getting there Yeah, so let me ask you so would Adam

Divine get it because before me you and him we get it probably both around May Just because it takes a long time to go through your contacts and send your number out right it takes forever It does to send me if you have to prove to somebody's people are like, this ain't you, and they'll call you the F-A-G word. Right, right, right, right. And then, but you know what word I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah. And they'll be like, this ain't you, whitey, wigga, they'll call you sometimes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're like, whoa, yeah, it is. And you have to send a picture. Sometimes it takes a couple minutes to remind each person that it is you. But look, man, if you cracked open my heart, dude, you'd be in there. Yeah. You know, I don't know.

You know, that's better said than done, you know? Well, and I'm gonna say this, that's better said than done, and I wanna say this, okay? Dude, don't do that to your eyes, dude. They will. What? I wanna make them slander different.

No, they'll stay that way. I don't do it. All right, so I wanna say this, okay to you, okay? Is number one, may I ask you a question? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. say my car you guys still harassing him on the internet that's what I'm judge may I may I have a pose please please pose a question okay I'm pretty sure out

of all your friends mm-hmm okay I was probably the least amount of person that would text you and harass you don't you think about things yeah communicate with me yeah yeah so why wouldn't I you know I'm not gonna be intrusive or bother you in any kind of way I would never You know, I didn't think you needed the number. Oh See that's what I thought that's good. That's a really good defense. What do you think judge? That's good. That's pretty good Do you have a rebuttal? I do need it interesting

Because you need it, but you don't want it. I never wanted it. You don't want to ask for it. And you shouldn't have to ask for it. Never going to ask. I'll give you some of it. Give me half of it? Like the area code? You'll hide the rest of it in L.A.

Well, I'll hide the rest around town. You know what? Hide one number at the improv. Hide one number at Pink Taco hide one number at pink taco Right a couple somewhere else. How are you gonna know that? Tim Dylan's house Tim Dylan's a big house Tim Dylan's house one number at a porn addiction meeting All right hide those numbers I'll find those numbers right and I will put them together dude. Oh Awesome. Yeah. Yeah, so sorry man. It's for I do I will give it to you. I will give them together dude. Oh awesome. Yeah. Yeah, so I'm sorry man

It's I do I will give it to you. I will give it to you soon. What does that mean? Hmm? Hmm, what does it mean? I think you know it means when you know, I think I'm glad we're talking about it And I'm looking forward to giving it to you. I Think all right, let's move on then. Okay. Yeah, let's move on. But I yeah, yeah, you're gonna get it I think all right, let's move on then okay. Yeah, let's move on but yeah, yeah, you're gonna get it You're gonna get it man. We'll see but look I showed up here in peace man. I came oh that's true That's true. I wore the authentic garb And I did it and I just I'm happy to be here man. It's more of a top gun vibe No, it's more of like a

D-Day or whatever. All right, right. Yeah. Yeah, D-Day. Look yeah. Yeah, it's pretty good like a... Magnum P. Day or whatever. Oh, right, right, right. Yeah, yeah, D-Day look. That's a pretty good look. Pearl Harbor kind of vibe or whatever. I feel like if you were in Pearl Harbor, you wouldn't have been that mad. If I was on which side? The American side. You're sleeping.

Uh-huh. You know what I mean? You hear, see fire. What would you do? If I ran Pearl Harbor? I could run it. Yeah. In this scenario, run it. I would call the police, probably. Really, the local Hawaii police? Hawaii PD.

Yeah, it's a Hawaii PD would show up. You know they got a lot of calls. They don't they don't ever talks about them when they talk about that, huh? What? The Hawaiian police. Right. Well, 911 probably was jammed up.

Yeah. Yeah, but you know what? I would call the fire trucks I'm on fire or something right wouldn't you be on fire? It was 9-1-1 already a thing back then. That's a great question Dude, um, I went and saw the hi where the Lahaina fires were oh, yeah, oh wow in my way. Yeah bad Oh, wow. In my way? Yeah. Bad? Unbelievable that how much stuff got burned down.

Yeah, all of Front Street. Yeah, crazy. And more. Like blocks, like just, it blew my mind. I thought it was a small area. It's a lot of it. It's a lot of area that got burned down. And then just some of the stories you hear from like the fire department that was there

and the water that it ran out of water, like the fire department that was there and the water They it ran out of water like there wasn't at a certain point. They just water just stopped I think they got they're just starting to like get there some of the the rebuild just starting Can you so you can go to Maui? Yeah, you can just like I can specifically or just general people you can go to Maui Yeah, what happens? But specifically like, you you know, Lahaina is still in like rebuilding mode. Where's Wailea? That's not on the other side. Yeah, that's the end I would probably be in.

You're always in Wailea. Yeah, Wailea is more like, yeah, fancy people. A lot of this white, just slurping pineapple. Yeah, I love pineapples with the whites. Yeah. Yeah, I love it. But where's Paellaella is that where? The paella, paella, paella.

That's sort of like right before like upcountry. That's not in La Jolla. Oh, that's right. So it was paella. Why are you smiling at? Paella is a Spanish rice dish. I keep thinking of the rice dish. It's delicious. I literally thought the town was made like based on the white rice dish. What? Nothing. You like paella? Yeah, I like it. I like it Who I know I know a somebody that made it a Spanish person

Tracks back back where you grew up your Roy's been putting on some weight, huh? Yeah, yeah, I mean got cheap fat right I didn't say that yeah, you did I mean, he's got cheek fat, right? I didn't say that. Yeah, you got some cheek fat. I got a little cheek fat. I didn't say that. Yeah, you did, but that's what you looked at. No, I didn't. Yeah, I could see through your aviators, you were looking at cheek fat.

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Yeah, eating more. Filipino auntie. And they say- You are a home. They always say it in like some roundabout way of like, ooh, lots of McDonald's. Filipino auntie by the way. They always say it in like some roundabout way of like ooh lots of McDonald's. Oh you can't run fast, huh? I mean I would love to see your face on the wide screen. Oh it's huge.

That would be just a flat screen, you know the ones that curve. The volume? Wait, your face is not that much smaller than his. Your face is on an adventure, isn't it? What? What? Whoa! That's intense what you're saying, dude.

I'm not saying, I don't know what I'm saying. I'm trying to talk to you. I know, I know. But so I've got more, I have like an Indiana Jonesy kind of vibe, like a Tomb Raider face. It's going on an adventure. Yes. Yeah. What do you mean by that? I think it just seems like, well, as we age, we look different. I agreed. I agree. I agree. Yeah. Yeah.

Do I look older to you? I think you look a little bit more. No, you don't look older. Okay. You look younger or you look indifferent. Yeah, but I've gained, have I gained weight? I don't know, man. I have.

You have? I mean, just. Oh, wow. Wow. God boy, they'll fuck you in prison, buddy. Wow. That's the kind of guy that gets smashed in prison around the holidays right there baby.

I'm really getting fat man. Oh that little Christmas plum right there baby. You look good to even working out. No I just got this jacket from somebody. I know but I just you know from what I see online you look great in the photos. No I haven't been. It's been busy a lot man. What have I been thinking about?

You're killing it right now. How do you feel? I feel pretty fine. I feel a little bit like I feel been busy a lot, man. What have I been thinking about? You're killing it right now. How do you feel? I feel pretty fine. I feel a little bit like, I feel just busy. I feel like I wish I had a, I feel like I need to make more time for things that are probably a little bit more important. Yeah, but you're stressed out.

Yeah, I'm just like, I want to do things pretty good as well as you can do, but sometimes you kind of put too many things or people will offer you other stuff to do. And then you're like, you don't want to let make people, you know, you don't want to let people down. And so stuff to do and then you're like, you don't wanna let people, you know, you don't wanna let people down. And so just kind of trying to figure out like, when I'm letting people down or am I letting myself down

by like over committing and like, you know, it's kind of tough to figure some of that out sometimes. But- I say yes to things and then I regret it like a month later. Yeah. You do that? I do it, but you, one thing you do about it that I noticed that you do really well, man, is that you it seemed like you made a

decision like about a year ago just to commit and do new things and like be more outgoing. Yeah. And to me, I've noticed that a lot. It's like, Wow, man, Bobby, like, he just he keeps going, you know, he doesn't isolate as much. Like even though you would think maybe. Yeah. Yeah. No, I've been I've been like, I've been going to like, I've been forcing myself to go to like dinner and gay. When a birthday party last night, I went to a birthday party last night. Really?

I didn't want to go, but I was just like, I have to go because it's like, I just have to learn how to do it. And for the most part, you know, mostly it's like, and who was it for? Um, dumbfounded. Oh, really? Yeah. John Park, you know, John? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. So him and it was aquafina a bunch of people were there And having conversation with and they're all friends of mine, but it's like a lot of times It's like I think what do I say next or how do I you know, I don't know. I just I get stuck Oh, yeah, you said something and then someone said something back and you're like well now. What do I do? Yeah? Yeah married Yeah, yeah, said something back and you're like well now what do I do? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm married. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I feel stuck and also in like dates when I go on dates with them I get stuck conversation. Like I start like it's more almost like a job interview sometimes. It is that's exactly how it feels. So um so um your parents still in your life when all they got a divorce. And you don't really give a fuck on the first date about that information. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you really want to know on a first date? That's such a good question, because it's like,

yeah, sometimes you're trapped. It's almost like you're going through the motions. What are you really, are you just trying to see if you even like being around each other? I think that's exactly it. I think if there's like just a connection, maybe that's not like built through conversation.

Like sometimes I just want to know that I like the way someone smells. I like the way their voice sounds. But because I've been on dates where it's felt just brutal, right? And he probably walked away being like, wow, that was a great date. And I walked away being like,

I never want to do that again. That felt just so like, like a job interview. And there have been dates where the conversation wasn't necessarily good, but the feeling was good. And so I think that's what you're looking for, the feeling, not so much what was said or how well it was said. Yeah, like, oh, I had a nice time. That was fun. Yeah. Yeah. I would like to spend more time with that person or be around them again. Yeah. It definitely does change as you get a little bit older too. You're like, yeah, what story can they tell you or something? It's hard to like.

You asked this important question. What do you ask? You like animals? I hate them. You know, I hate dogs, I cats. Once they say that, I'm out. That's for me. Do you like animals though?

No, I'm just saying. No, it's like, do you have a pet? Do you have a dog or a cat? No, I don't. I'm not opposed to it. I would just have another opportunity to be an owner. All right, but I'm sorry I'm asking you then. Growing up, did you have an animal or a dog?

No, I got attacked by a couple of dogs. What else? My gay friend used to raise pit bulls and, what else? It was a lot of like kind of dog violence in our area. Okay, let me ask you another question. Last violence. If you were, do you live in a house?

I live in a apartment. Okay. I live in a house in Nashville. In Nashville, yeah. Right. So if you saw, you heard a dog whimpering in your backyard, a puppy, right? How do we know it's a puppy? The whimper's different.

Oh, yeah. Uh, that means the T is ready. I'm going to sound effect school and I mixed up the fuck. Try to get it. Dude, that is a dolphin. It's about to. Oh, fucking dolphin. Blast.

Oh yeah, blast. Yeah, yeah, that's right. There we go. That's pretty good. Pretty good, right? Uh-huh. What do you do? Do I hear that?

Yeah. I say, hey, quiet down now. Yeah, for me, for me, I'd be like, no, I don't want to see this person. That's just for me. No, I would go out there and check if it's an animal. I would probably take a flashlight or something if it's at night. Yeah.

And you would, and you, and I know you Theo, you would do the best you could. You would take the fucking puppy, bring it inside, probably Google like, what do I do? You know what I mean? I think you would do all that stuff. I don't think you would leave a puppy out there. That would be crazy.

I don't know who would do that. There are people that would. There's been people, one time I had to stay at my buddy's house when we're children and he said oh and we were all sleeping at his house, right? And there they had a dog They had a dog that Was howling all night and I was so scared. We're all in his room There was like five of us

It was a sleepover and he had all these animals cages on the wall And he had all these pets right all different pets like everything from chinchillas to like fucking um couple of little you know everything snakes little llamas or whatever you know you can't put you don't put those like cages on a wall. Bro stacks of cages and all the animals. Is your friend named Noah? I mean is there flood coming? What's going on here, bud? They were nocturnal animals.

Oh, okay. So everybody goes to sleep, and I can't sleep, and there's a ceiling fan warring, and all the animals woke up, and they're all looking with their eyes at me out of their cages, and I'm the only person awake. And I was so scared to go to sleep,

because they had like five or six snakes he had in there, and the dog was howling outside all night, right outside. Yeah. And his dad went out there in middle of the night, popped him off. No. Took the dog's life or the door or left a gun out there and the dog took his life. But I don't believe it.

Yeah, I don't believe it. They don't have the dad did it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. That's fucking night. Heart man.

Yeah. So I think there was a lot of like animal violence around Yeah, yeah, wow that's a dog danger people would have attack dogs There would be dogs loose in our area that would attack people a lot Hmm. There's a different time. It was when there was more loose dogs now You don't see as much loose dogs running. Yeah, unless you're in Florida I had a dog named Skippy was a Yorkshire Terrier. And I threw, I kept throwing Skippy onto the bed and he hit the fucking bed with just one leg and it broke his leg.

Oh no. So he goes, mama, mama, Skippy is, right? And she goes, don't worry. And she went and got chopsticks. And tied it to him. And just tied it to two. The splint? This is a splint.

Yeah. And I go, I guess, top six work. Yeah. Well, we gotta just go to the vet too. I don't know if that's helping. If that's helping. I think a splint might help. Daddy gonna buy you a new potella.

Wait, Theo. This guy was singing to his kid. I'm like, that guy doesn't know anything. Wait, how do you, do you go out on dates at all? Or do you just like meet women through friends? Yeah, what have I been doing? I've been doing some dating. I haven't been doing that good at it.

I think I've just been working more, you know? And I think I just haven't been focused on it. I don't need to feel bad about it or anything. I think when I'm a little more ready, maybe I'll try and focus on it more. But do you go on dates and actually enjoy your time? Or are you just like, oh, fuck, I just gotta get through this? Yeah, I go on dates and enjoy enjoy your time? Or are you just like, oh, fuck, I just got to get through this?

Yeah, I go on dates and enjoy it my time. I went on some dates with a girl in Nashville. I went on some dates with a girl here. It's been good. I want to tell you something. I forgot to tell you. Whoa. It's all right.

You want to fucking finish this shit? Yeah, and we will. I'll drop you off at a VFW and fucking let it all finish I made a growth to store beautiful Burnett right and we took we're talking about a drink and she oh yeah it's a little a little apisto sorry that's Spanish I'm on very good yeah and I'm taking a big I go I go I go 13.com so I go um she goes I go so I go So I go um She goes I go well what's your story? She doesn't know I know I go you single she goes I am and then we just start talking I go well if you did a comic you I did I did one of a couple days with

Theo Vaughn she said Just hear me out and then I go well what happened? She's I don't we just kind of lost trust and stuff, right? So I'll take you out and she goes no What happened? She said, I don't we just kind of lost trust and stuff, right? So I'll take you out and she goes, no. And then what you do is just stand there. I just got up and left. Oh, wow. That's good. It broke me. Wow. It broke me. Why? Cause you would date me and I choose these girls that would date you and I don't think so. I think there's more of this than that than than the other, you know,

but when I honestly, I see you think I think I know, let's, no, we don't have crossover at all. Me and spade, me and spade have crossed. Oh, I know that means spade have crossed over. Really? I don't have crossover with you. But if you, you know, you guys would have more, you guys would probably have more crossover

if you were on time though. What do you mean? You think we're late for spade? Oh, spades late. Yeah. Is that your saying? I'm not saying he's late. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do Is that your saying? I'm not saying he's late. Yeah. What do you say? Time then? I'm just saying you showed up late. I showed up late.

For a mirror when spade was on those podcasts. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Did he complain about that about you? Huh? He didn't say anything. Not he didn't say much. I mean, that was the first time I ever saw him mad. Like I've never seen David Spade mad. And when I saw him, he was so disappointed and he wanted to leave. Oh, I know It was hard. He did stay like a trooper, but a trooper. Yeah, he helped me out ran out of gas one time I remember ran out of gas. Probably I probably ran a gas 26 27 times. Yeah, he Brought me gas. Yeah out there on the hill here. No, it's nice of them. So nice. Yeah

I what about you guys, huh? I what about you guys wait? So why don't you think you guys would ever have crossover for dating? Yeah, I think obviously look dude both of us are getting older We obviously have severe commitment issues. We're obviously not it man Really? Yeah guy. Hey guy, I'm sorry. That's not it, guy. All right? And I, listen, I want to say something. Yeah, we know you do.

You always say that. We knew when we got here that you wanted to say something. We're excited about. All right, man. So I already told you, dude, that on Raya, I had matched with two or three people and they go, the only reason why we matched with you is because can you hook me up with Theo? Swear to God. And I would block them on Raya.

I do find it interesting that a lot of my lesbian friends have said this. We'd only go straight for Theo. Like girl, like, like, butchie girls. Yeah, healing, huh? Yeah, you're very much below. You're a different caliber right now than me. Now, granted, I still compete. Oh, yeah.

I'm still up to bat, right? Yeah. But a different league, I think. Like a local circuit. You know what I mean? Yeah, the Bach Choice Circuit. Yeah, the Bach Choice Circuit, right? But what I'm saying is that I think we're in a different league

because, you know, and this girl at the comedy store, when I go, let's go out, she said, no, she was beautiful. I mean, she was like a model, you know what I mean? I fucked it up, probably. Yeah, you probably did Sometimes you don't even you lose somebody's number. You don't even know who they are anymore. I know Where my number is says tiff Tiffany San Francisco or I mean Francisco Tampa Bay and you go Why did I put Tampa Bay? It's probably a girl I met in Tampa Bay

And I got her numbered and thinking that if I say Tampa Bay on the funk of thing That I'm gonna remember but then I always forget right. Yeah. Yeah, but man Anyway, I don't I'm not looking down on myself I'm killing it and I and I'm gonna find true love soon. You know, um, you guys ever thought about joining the service Oh the military. Yeah, yeah, I thought about it. What's the cutoff now 44 right? Yeah, it's 44 to 54. I could still join Hey, yeah, yeah, what division? Huh? What division? probably short division Right now we first or last I mean in a war do we this short division go out first?

We're gonna probably give you the drum. All right I'm a pond. I'm the first guy Running like a normal How's he playing? On a drum incredible I think in a war though you and I I think we would you and I would survive Don't you think dude? I just always love being around you, man. I'm just realizing that. I always forget sometimes how much fun

that I'm having around you. Yeah, would you and I survive? You would be in the little, the trench or whatever. Foxhole. In the foxhole. And yeah, I'd probably have to go out and get us firewood or whatever. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

You're not going out there, dude. What? Do you know why? Do you know go out and get us firewood. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no You're not going out there. What? Yeah, you know, do you know why? Do you know why I'm not getting firewood? Do you know why I'm not getting firewood? I'll tell you why. Because I made the fire with the bodies. Mmm. The clothes I mean that they're wearing. Oh, use the clothes they're wearing to make fire? Yeah, yeah. I gather up, I get, I strip other dead soldiers, I pile it up. And I go, no, the idea, the idea.

Flammable. Okay. Right? But three minutes later, we're gonna need to be one. Oh, yeah, you're right, you're right, you're right. Okay, but then they check it out. I know, but check it out. Right? But I would be like, I would be strategic with this shit, dude. Okay. It's day. Let's not go now.

At night, we go to get the firewood. Yeah. And we go together. Yeah. Right? But we crawl. You go first. I'll we go to get the firewood. And we go together. Right? But we crawl. You go first, I'll be right back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we crawl in a certain way.

Check this out, Ted. Crawl on our sides like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But also you crawl. Nobody crawls like that. No, you crawl, no, you crawl dead. You crawl dead, so when you hear any movement, you're dead. Yeah.

But then like, oh, that's nothing. Let's keep going. And you crawl dead, so you're in the dead position then like, oh, that's nothing. Let's keep going. And you crawl dead, so you're in the dead position. Oh, I love that. And fear yourself with blood already. Oh, oh, yeah, I got all kinds. I got black people's blood, white people's blood. I got all kinds of blood.

Wow. What? No, I like your idea, man. I don't know if we could handle a big war, though. The trauma. I can't do death. Can you? You've been through some death, man. Oh, yeah, my dad.

Well, you've been through some death. Yeah, I've all been through some. That's a weird thing about staying alive is people die. Yeah. You know. Yeah, comics. I guess we have seen some death, man. I just wanted to think about, do you fear death? Do I fear it? Yeah. No, I mean, I've tried that DMT. That kind of shows you what it's going to be like. All right. So it's not like spooky. I just wonder if you get to eventually see everybody again if you get to meet back up with the old gang or not.

What did you witness something on DMT? Yeah, I just kind of like a tree just grew straight out of my throat up into the heavens. And then, yeah, and then you realize everything's gonna be okay. How does ayahuasca feel? Pretty pretty cool. You guys haven't done it yet. No I want to do it. You guys should do it. It's just so it seems like it's right up your alley it's just I know. I mean people just tell me not to do it though. Who is? People go you're an addict you're gonna get addicted to ayahuasca. I've

never heard of people going god damn I need some ayahuasca right now you know what I mean? They don't get addicted to this shit. Like. I've never heard of people going, God damn, I need some ayahuasca right now. You know what I mean? They don't get addicted to this shit. Like, dog, I gotta fucking hang out with my spirit again. Yeah, yeah. I did it right over here, man. By a damn Popeye's the first time I did it. Popeye's? Oh, Popeye's in there.

In an Airbnb, not far from one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I heard it's just a very cosmic, do you vomit? This last time I did. Wow, A lot. No, just like I was like trying to get like some of this anger out of me. And I vomited at some point. He just purged it out.

Yeah. Like made this same like shape, but with my mouth that I would make when I was like a kid, when I was like angry kind of, and it, when I got there, shape right, it, all this anger flew out of my fucking body. Wow. Did you make a noise? I saw I made it but it was like a silent noise like it you could make the noise but like you know and then it just I mean it literally came from my toes this fucking. You could feel it bro it's pretty chill. It was like cumulative anger through time. Yes, that's exactly what it was

Yeah, but from your childhood, too. Yeah from the beginning of time Wow, and it I felt Immediately better after than I'd felt in years. Wow sounds amazing I need to get my kid just it gets all that a lot of you all the all the Wine just it just fucking throws that out of you. I Don't know any other way to do it man. That's a thing, but you talk it. I mean, can you talk it out? Yeah, we just take you probably a couple decades. Yeah. Yeah, this shit does it in Like two days today. I believe that. I do do. Just cause of how well ketamine worked for me

and I did it once and it just lifted all of my anxieties. It's just like kind of cleared my window pane a little bit. And I was like, wow, I've never felt it this fast and this effective. Like, and I was on like, like meds for a very long time when I was younger. Nothing worked as good as Ketamine. I'm still sober, I'm still active. Are you sexually active?

Yeah. I'll tell you this, bud. Pretty damn good, dude. No way, really? Yeah. I, um, I um I spit In the kitchen What you did yeah, they asked me oh wow is that like a tradition or something? No, no, no

I don't know if you're maybe whatever. No, she was Polish or something. I don't know But I went in the fucking run You're a cab driver. Yeah. Yeah. Well, she asked me what the fuck was Luba. No, there was no COVID. I got tested right before that. You could spit in the kooch. Yeah. Right. And she goes, yeah, she didn't have to ask you. You should have already done that. Sounded you have a piece of rice. No, it was a skittle. Oh, God. That's a little embarrassing. What?

If a girl has to tell you to spit, it means like you, she's feeling pretty dry and she needs... Well, don't they have their own lubrication system within the body? Yeah. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't judge me.

Sorry. Look, don't judge me because the machine's broken, dude. There we go. Thank you. But you gotta put some quarters in it, you know, oh The quarter oh, I see that's how you put the machine on we just got to get the machine Go it's like you know when you're those when you go to a grocery store and they have those little horsies in the front Right. Yeah, I sometimes I think I thought why is it working and then I see the little slot

Is that what you're saying? Mm-hmm, right? So put some money in the fucking horsey. Yeah, so it moves So I spit but I'll tell you another thing that I did, dude, I can't come. Yeah, what? Why though? I don't understand. I just, I don't want to. That's so strange to me.

I don't, I'll tell you, you're gonna save it? I figured out why. All right. I figured out why. Yeah. When I come, I feel empty. Mm. And depressed.

Dude, I do too, right? So then it's like, a lot of times I just don't want them, I want them to leave. But I'm not a mean guy. So I just stay with somebody after I nut and for a couple hours and I feel empty, but then I'm pretending. But you didn't really, or you're actually,

I say you saying if you actually come. If I actually come. So what I did the other night was, do you like hearing this stuff? I mean, you tell it every time. Then you ask her. Every time I get around you, yeah. You're either come coming out of your,

not coming out of your, yeah. The other day, I made her come, and she goes, well, you don't wanna finish? And I go, no. We're both naked, and she kinda laid her head here, and I wanted to be there. Okay, so you're saying you don't wanna come because you can tolerate the after sex

Cuddling better way better and you still like them you continue to I still like them a lot because Interesting when you when the poison has been sucked out of you then you stop liking them immediately And I don't know if I said this before but I've done something clever You date a girl who has a dog who lives by themselves. Okay. Why? Because eventually they go, I got to go home. Yeah. Because Harry is I got to walk Harry. Oh yeah. And they go, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Harry, cool. So you really don't like it when they spend the night. Do you? I, uh, I'm fine with it. It doesn't seem like you are I mean I'm fine with it. I mean it doesn't seem like it does he

I'll do it if it needs to be and I'm a gentleman did you guys have separate bedrooms you live together? No? No, no, wow. Yeah, but she was the only person that I could sleep Next to and sleep. Yeah, like I felt you know like usually we know how sometimes you're with a new girl And you just can't sleep They just the smell they're positioning. Oh, so you don't want to move a dead body No, no, no, no. So I don't know, but like with her, she was like, I could sleep next to you like a baby. Wow. Yeah, yeah.

That's who we want to find. Someone you can sleep next to like a baby. You found it, man. Dude, what are you doing? Amigo. Huh? 244. Don't get fucking, oh, now you're Mexican now?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't do this right now, dude. We love each other, man. now you're Mexican now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Don't do this right now, dude We love each other man. We got a good relationship. Okay I'm just saying sometimes it feels like it's just You let something go that could have been something. Oh Shut up. I don't know what you're fucking you come here late I don't know what the fuck you're doing you come around this town, dude

You come around deadwood once a fucking year and you fucking throw these sling your fucking guns You look to make a fucking scene and then you drive off and you're fucking horsey dude. I'm a recruiter brother. Okay? I just did two Tours I know you do I know 41st Dearborn So you go to Australia tomorrow Yeah, been there been dude. Yeah, yeah. So you're going to Australia tomorrow. Yeah. Been there? Been there.

Yeah. You've been over there? We're going in November with bad friends. Yeah, we're not going to go. I'll tell you. We're not going to go when you're going. I'll tell you why. Oh, I know why.

Oh, you know why, right? Yeah. I got the phone call. You know why, right? We made a very big mistake. Look, first of all, I brought, look, is this an attorney commercial you're seeing? I know.

Why is it yours? I don't know why is this thing. Over here, 1-800 lawyers. Just try to class up this joint. Oh, there we go. It's not, you don't fit in with that clothes. Did I fit in before? Yeah, you did.

Way better. With your fancy shoes, the cool shoes, I was like, oh, those are cool shoes. It just feels weird, but it's fine. I like it, George. So let's talk about a lesson that we learned. What is the lesson you think? Okay, so I got the phone call and the phone call was this.

I mean, we're in Bad Friends is in the same city as Theo. And... I can see where this is going. What are you looking at, Dad? Your wife. I think you sold out back to back to back shows there. You killed it there. And I'm just saying that you, you're having a moment like Shane Gillis's, you know?

You guys are like the top white dudes on planet Earth right now. No, man. Yeah, dude, you're killing it. I mean, yeah, I mean, it's definitely, obviously, yeah, it's great that everybody comes out. It's been awesome, man. I can't even believe it sometimes,

but I'm not saying that you're not humble about it. I think you're very humble about it. I think, you know, maybe there's parts of you that's scared even, I don't even believe it sometimes, but I'm gonna say that you're not humble about it I think you're very humble about it I think you know maybe there's parts of you that's scared even I don't know but because I know you I'm just saying that it's you doing well, and I'm proud of you. Thanks, man. Yeah you too And I feel that for myself as well. Yeah, I mean it doesn't have to be a fucking hand-jerk session, but like I'm just saying that I have a difficult time looking around my own life and going, I'm proud of myself. Yeah, me too.

Yeah, like even today I posted, I'm drugstore June, they go, can you post this? Because I'm the opening face in the movie. So they did a test at the man Chinese theater for the premiere tomorrow night. Oh that's fucking right. And my my gigantic head what? Where did they do it at? Man's Chinese? It's a fucking generalization. I never thought about that. They could have gone anywhere like the arc light.

Yeah or at least do it all I do it on teamoo.com. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm just saying at least respect it all I do it on team who dot com But I'm just saying yeah at least respect the fucking yeah culture, you know, but then like I had to make a joke like look at my big You know I mean Mongoloid head, you know, I mean, you know like I had to make a joke about You know something that's you know a cool thing. You know I mean just let me sell my again here Yeah, say something that get, yeah. But a lot of times I can't take compliments, I can't go, you know what dude,

you're doing well and any of that stuff. Like I have, since January, I've just got all kinds of things happening. And I just have to sit back and look at it and go, you know what dude? At 52, you didn't quit. You know a lot of dudes you started with in 95 that aren't in it.

And I was able to kind of reinvent myself a couple of times and figure it out. And I should just be happier about, but I'm not. I'm always like, I always have to put myself in a gloom and doom situation because that's where I'm comfortable, you know? But I'm proud of doing that. So we should both look at ourselves and go, you know what?

We worked. We do. I'm saying you reinvented yourself. You fucking what you want to stand up in the beginning. We worked hard. We worked hard. I remember you from the back of the day. So my point is, is that, you know, you should, we should be able to go, you know,

I fuck you up. We, we're going to enjoy this. Yeah. You know, yes. Sometimes I forget that, uh, I almost forget all the time about how much how hard oh My god such a cute picture. There we are right there. Oh my god. I was on Harry Mandel show. Oh It was oh, was it that prank phone call show? I Remember that oh, yeah, you were hosting that was it was a book

What was it called? Oh, deal with it. Oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. I do remember, yeah, you did host that show for highway. Do y'all have a diet coke in here by chance? Is that a weird thing to ask somebody right now?

Maybe a Red Bull. You want sugar for your Red Bull? Dude, how crazy is Team Udub? Have you been on, it's like, for $4 you can buy a family or something. Yeah, you know I have a Diet Coke out there but it's not cold. It's like kind of room temperature. That's fun.

You know I'm a room temperature Diet Coke. Yeah, but like Timu is like, they're always like $3 socks or whatever, you know? They do have some pretty cute stuff though. Like, do your, make your, build your own home for $9. What is, what is, what is T-Mu? T-Mu is like an Amazon, right?

Yeah. But they have. The prices slash the. Yeah. Oh my God. $7. Well, you can get sand people's shoes for fucking $35. Oh dude, you can get racism on here for $4.

Dude, are you kidding me? $4 for how many? Well, you can get 70 sponges wow that's insane dude why because there's just like no I don't know how does this happen China oh it's China is how it starts Bobby they get us they run a Super Bowl yeah they have Super Bowl ad and everything very American now. Wow. And come three or four years,

you will be Chineseing yourself up, bro. Try and make the cut. Oh, so in a couple years I gotta be like. I'm not saying what you have to do, you figure it out. But they're only taking one kind, brother. The Chinese kind. It's funny you say that. I think I'm gonna do it.

Go Chinese? Can it work? I might go Chinese though. Go full Chinese, huh? But is it too late? No. Because so many people know me as Korean. Nah, you'd be surprised.

Yeah, you'd be waiting for that. What do I need to, okay, let me ask you guys. People think of you as like a little, all type of things things they don't know Yeah, I like a little gently no like a little fucking yeah amphibian What is it what give me the things I need to do to change to China to go Chinese you got to get a bike All right bike you got to get a bike

Okay, you have to get some bamboo or something for the for my for my panda Just to be on the back of the bike if they have a bushel of all I'll push you with something and would I have a Lot of rise kind of do rise sort of is that to it's too heavy a bike with yeah, yeah Probably yeah, but it's too like you Asian. This is not China. Yeah, you gotta go full China What if I get like a stainless steel rickshaw? Stainless yeah, I want to upgrade. I want to win. Yeah. Yeah. What if I get like a stainless steel rickshaw? Geez. Stainless steel. Yeah, I want to upgrade. I want to win one.

Yeah, yeah. What are you the fucking, you're the Tom Segura of Asians? You give a fucking Lambert beat of rickshaws? Yeah, like a lightweight one, right? That's like, you know this Oster Pistorius, the runner? Yeah, his leg. He got his wife because he was trying to pee really loudly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bro, that was Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah What? Just if someone doesn't have legs, does it mean they can...

Shoot them. You're right. What I said that? I know. What I just said that, I go, you're right. That doesn't give you permission. And anyone listening right now? It does not give you permission to do that. And that's what I...

You know what? That's the error of my ways. I'm sorry. Okay. You don't want to take that off? Is it hot? Does it hot, dude? No, I'm not fucking taking this off, brother.

It's a good combo. It's a good combo. So... Thanks. What do you want to promote? You want to that off? Is it hot? Does it hot, dude? No, I'm not fucking taking this off, brother. It's a good combo. It's a good combo. So, what do you wanna promote? You wanna promote anything? No, it is Australia. Yeah, what's going on? Not much, man. Just, yeah, it's just, it's so wild

that we got in a podcasting and then we're still in it, you know? It's so wild that it's like becoming even like a bigger medium and like that so many people do it That's something that just blows my mind all the time. What blows my mind is we got it early And we need to get in that early. I know I mean, there was the first wave I think was Rogan and Mark Mark Marin. Yeah, yeah, I mean think about it Mark Marin had the president Obama in his garage. I know he He's done Brad Pitt, Leo DiCaprio.

He's done Brad Pitt and Leo? Yeah, and Brad Pitt made Leo do it. Wow. Yeah, so it's like, yeah, so they were the first and then. But you've had some incredible guests on yours. Oh, lately? Yeah, you've had some good ones. Yeah, we've had some interesting folks, man.

Having Dana White was super cool. Yeah, but you also had scientists and shit. Peterson a couple times? Yeah. Oh you also had, um, scientists and shit. Peterson a couple of times. Yeah. Oh, Jordan Peterson. He's a good guy, right? Yeah. He's just smart.

Yeah. He's a smart. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you're like, I need to go like take a break from this class for a second. Sometimes when you're listening to him, it's just, you know, it's a lot of information. Yeah. It's like being in college.

And I was talking to him. Let's do a prayer. No, no, no, no, no, like a prayer. I really want to do a vacation with you. A real one? Like after, because we're getting busy, but fine time, not just you and I, a bunch of guys and girls, comics that we like. Let's just go somewhere. Where should we go? Or once you're a birthday, that's on by the interstate member. Yeah. Yeah. Let's just go somewhere. Where should we go? I went to your birthday that time by the interstate, remember? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, yeah.

Where? What was that? Did you talk about the Korean restaurant? Oh no, you're talking about the Filipino place. That's parks. Oh, Parks Bar. Parks Finest. Oh, that's right.

That was a long time ago. Parks Finest, yeah. Parks Finest, the Filipino spot. Yeah, yeah. Hey buddy. No, but I'm talking about like something where we can all kind of just relax and create. Hey buddy, you're in hospice. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. Lot of Filipinos work in hospice, man. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's wild. The

last face most people see before they die is Filipino. My mom was a hospice nurse. Yeah. And she was a really, really good one. And you're right. Her face. I mean, are they old? Think about that. 60, probably 40 to 60%, I would say, of US Americans, the last face they see. That makes me think that the Filipinos going like this. When you're dying and you're like, are they doing that? No, they're just like, don't look at me, you know?

Well, you're not even there looking at them. You're on your way out. Oh That's What if that's why you do what you do? I'll say this is a nice guy They're like did he have any last words? No, he stuck his lizard tongue out like yeah, but yeah I think it's just Filipinos just be like can I get you anything or how can I help and then you just Disappear into the ether, you know, oh, I'll try to say something crazy

I go on but your brain protects you from the Dying so you're not there anymore. What do you mean protects you? I mean, that's the whole thing with like DMT, right? Like your brain protects you from the trauma of dying Yeah I mean, that's a whole thing with like DMT, right? Like your brain protects you from the trauma of dying. Yeah. You're just elated. You feel like a level of joy that you never felt in your entire, that you didn't even imagine could exist

during the death process. The death process. You know, it's so funny when my dad died, I think that's what I saw. How did he look? Like, do you mean like, uh, like Stevie? Yeah, he looked just like Stevie. No, he went like, like, I think he tried to smile.

Yeah. He went like, he didn't like this, right? Yeah, he took that like, the last breath. No. Yeah. You got a jar that bitch up, huh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And then here's the trauma of it.

Not just that, not that. My mom. The whaling. Oh, fuck. Oh, it's hard. Did it immediately kick on? The whaling? Yeah.

Yeah, he took his last breath and then you, you, you spend a couple of seconds realizing what's going on and then you realize he's gone and then my brother and my mom's wailing and then my brother how long till you hit your vape right after that oh I'm vaping then oh yeah you don't care and then two wailings so now I couldn't wail yeah when you have two people in the room wailing yeah you can't you can't I had to be the stoic one yeah so I put my glasses I had glasses on and I just put my hand on the bed like this and I just stood there weird. Like I couldn't deal with it. It's so funny to me how like people have different reactions to death because when my dad

died, same thing like we saw him take his last breath. I was my mom, my sister and I and my best friend, but everyone was just quiet in the corner of my eye. I saw my best friend. My dad had a gangrenous foot at that point because there was no blood profusion in that area. Yeah, and she had the weirdest reaction which I will never forget. Like he takes his last breath or he's about to and I see her in a corner of my eye,

petting his black foot, just his gangrenous foot and having like a moment like just between her and his dead foot and I just started laughing. Yeah, yeah. It was the funniest shit ever, but it was like a relief cry laugh. Yeah. Yeah. But it wasn't no wailing. How old was your dad then? He was almost 80. Yeah. I mean, that's when they go. You got to pet that dark foot. I think you have to. You have to. Bro, if I were a black guy, that would be my pickup line. Yeah, who wants to pick?

Also, if she was probably near, that was, she was near the black foot. Well, that was the first thing. So she has different choices. Like, do we reach in to get a not black area of the body or just go for the closest thing near you? Yeah, just be comforting. Yeah.

And there's, police officers will say, a lot of times you'll see them outside of like a severe crime scene and they'll be laughing because your body sometimes will just do that in order to find out if it's okay. It's why the Joker is how he is. Yeah, there's for sure a very fine line between like pain and laughter. I think people who get like tattooed have that same reaction, but when we were in the mortuary and they were telling us like they were giving us options for like, you know We're to carry the ashes and stuff my mom my sister and I were like in this like like hysterical

Like laughing fit and we couldn't figure out why and it was so fucking sad But that's just how we coped in that moment. Were you there there when your dad died? No, I'm trying to think of the last time I saw him. I Got some pictures of the last time I saw him. I'll try to send you one if I remember okay But what you did obviously got a phone call? Yeah, they said You should come see him, you know and I went and saw him and Yeah, he was just like laying down and he

Like kind of had like his his were unbuttoned because it like hurt his waist or whatever. Right. And yeah, he was just laying there. I don't remember what we said to each other or anything. Yeah. And it was at like his other kids house. And so we didn't really get along with them that great or whatever. So I think I felt weird kind of, I didn't feel like, I don't know if I don't know how it felt. Wait how many kids do they have that outside of? We had three children that were older and and did you do you still do you talk to them now or no those three kids? No not really we never really chatted. Right right. They were different they were just

different. And but you have siblings with your biological mother too? Yep we got three siblings. Three siblings, you talk to them? Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. They're pretty good. They come to your shows and stuff? Yeah, they come. They came last time, we had some in Louisiana,

they had a nice time. Oh, cool. So it was fun. They ask about you sometimes. Do they really? Yeah, they say, I wanna know about that guy. What is that guy? What do you mean?

People think I'm weird, but do you think I'm weird? No, I don't think. The people go, hey man, you're weird. Like, I like Bobby because he's weird. And I can be recommence like that. It's like, I don't, I do stuff like that, but that's not, but that's not weird. Yeah.

I don't know what you're like. I think you're hard to figure out kind of a little bit, but I don't know if it matters if people are harder or easy to figure out. I don't know if you'd want someone that's just easy to figure out. I don't know. You're you, man, it's good.

And you're you. Listen, Theo, good luck on your travels. What? Yeah, yeah. Good luck on your travels. You're going out of the country tomorrow. Yeah, we're going out of, yeah. Yeah, be nice to him here.

Figure out when you want to send me that number. You don't have to do it right away. You don't have to come. You don't have to come. To kick her. OK. Who sings that? Who sings that?

Oh, fucking Debbie Gibson. Oh, Debbie Gibson. That's a big star though in her day. She was. Do it again? Because I'm gonna be all right tonight. Beyonce. Dude, yes.

Sometimes I would be on the school bus and there would be a song that would come on and I would get I was at a Running just as fast as you can Trying to get away And we tumble to the ground and then you say I think we're alone now Tiffany That's Tiffany or it would make me so erect on the bus that I had to miss my stop. I was like, there's no way. You know what song was that for?

A lot of the guys that I grew up with, I don't know who sings that. I think it's like Donna Lewis. I love you always forever. But it was her soft angelic voice that would give him a full erection. So weird. I could not get all, I was afraid if I get off the bus,

I am getting molested out here. And hey, and it'll be my fault. You know, I'm like, yeah. So I would stay on the bus, and sometimes they wouldn't notice it, you just be on the fucking bus, and then you'd have to get out at the fucking bus driver's house and that she lived 12 miles outside of town.

Walk to the gas station or whatever, just cause you couldn't get that hammer down, you know? This song right here, it's a song called White Horse. Oh yeah. By Layback. You Wanna Ride. Yeah, this song is from day one. It was in my heart.

I mean, it wasn't written yet. But when I listen to the song, it's just that, it's my life story. Oh, it's your life story. It's just when I'm walking around, this song is every movement in my body. It's like, there's like a little band in my heart that's singing it.

That's how I feel about Bob Seager Nightmoves. Can I play it or not? You know what that sounds like? Is a hot chip. Yeah. Right? This is from 40 years ago. I know, I know, I know that.

Fuck hot chip. That is a good vibe, dude. I would love to see you with a lot more, like at a big, a pre varmitsa Oh like a black concert, you know vibing out at a good. Let me ask you about that Not black Let me ask you about that right? Because I see you

You're always in games UFC games with other people. I wanna go too. Really? I like fights. Okay, I didn't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would you go? I think it's a game or a fight. I wanna go. And then you and Calip Pressley,

whatever that guy's name is, wearing like fucking graduation uniforms. I think you've upgraded your friends, dude. Really? Let's be honest. Well, I don't think that's true, man. Yeah, I can fight me. Yeah?

Who's in my space top five right now? My space top five? Yeah. One, probably, hmm. Who is one? Got it so hard, huh? I'll tell you my one. Kaleila.

Wow. Two. Androcentino. Oh, okay. Got to put Andy in there. Yeah? Three, Jean Hong. There you go. It makes sense. Gee Hong. Is that a man or woman? Both. Okay. Transitioning. Number four. I think Dumbfounded, John Park. Dude, I love John Park and I can't believe you didn't invite me. Let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me tell you something. Okay. Yeah, okay

You oh You didn't invite me last night Park's birthday. Yeah, I'll do this right now. Yeah, why don't you say something you? Played the Wiltern. Yeah And when I got done I don't know any friends no, oh The our dinner was when you were headlining the Wilton Theater. Okay. So how in the fuck am I gonna invite you? But you said the dinner was four hours long.

I know, but at three hours in I'm not gonna go. I'll tell you why. Can I, why? Thank you. Can I tell you why? I don't have your number. Fuck. Oh, there it was. Okay. I would have. I don't have your number. Oh, there it was.

Okay. I would have very... I don't have your fucking number. Too shit. Too shit in your fuck face. Very, very, very, very. Okay. Well, happy belated birthday to him.

I love him. I'm glad he's still alive, too. Okay. Well, give the award to Ronald Wazer, everybody. We're done? We're done.