Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 186 - The Sex Suck: Who's Doing What, Female Ejaculation, and More!

Episode Date: April 6, 2020

Let's talk about sex! What is "normal" based on data? Who’s having sex? What kinds of sex are they having? Are you having more or less sex than the average Meatsack? Are you having freakier sex? Or is it pretty vanilla? Gonna talk about kink today. What kinds of kinks are out there? Are you kinky? Why do we like kink? Why do so many get turned on by getting tied up or spanked or playing dress-up? Gonna talk about porn! How much is out there? Is it bad for you? Good for you? Both? Gonna talk about sex robots. How will they change the future of human sexuality? And yes, Space Lizards, we will talk about female ejaculation. We will learn so much about the activity that brought you here and an activity many of our lives seems to revolve around, today, on Timesuck! Hail Lucifina! Listen to my new standup special "Get Outta Here, Devil" on Pandora right now for free: https://pandora.app.link/Az9xIdU6s5Beta test Max Lazarau's new game, Football Legends! Youtube preview https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeTyCdXVS60 Discord link: https://discord.gg/auze9HSWorld Health Organization COVID-19 information: https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019 Watch my Amazon special Don't Wake the Bear: https://amazon.com We've donated $5,000 this month to the Meals on Wheels COVID-19 response fund. Vulnerable seniors are at the greatest risk amid COVID-19. Local Meals on Wheels programs are on the front lines every day, focused on doing all they can to keep older Americans safe and nourished in communities across the country. To learn more or donate yourself, click HERE.2020 Toxic Thoughts Tour Is Currently On HOLD due to the COVID-19 Pandemic. Listen to the best of my standup on Spotify! (for free!) https://spoti.fi/2Dyy41d Watch the Suck on YouTube: https://youtu.be/xSzMEHZuyIUMerch - https://badmagicmerch.com/ Want to try out Discord!?! https://discord.gg/tqzH89v Want to join the Cult of the Curious private Facebook Group? Go directly to Facebook and search for "Cult of the Curious" in order to locate whatever current page hasn't been put in FB Jail :) For all merch related questions: https://badmagicmerch.com/pages/contact Please rate and subscribe on iTunes and elsewhere and follow the suck on social media!! @timesuckpodcast on IG and http://www.facebook.com/timesuckpodcast Wanna become a Space Lizard? We're over 7500 strong! Click here: https://www.patreon.com/timesuckpodcast Sign up through Patreon and for $5 a month you get to listen to the Secret Suck, which will drop Thursdays at Noon, PST. You'll also get 20% off of all regular Timesuck merch PLUS access to exclusive Space Lizard merch. You get to vote on two Monday topics each month via the app. And you get the download link for my new comedy album, Feel the Heat. Check the Patreon posts to find out how to download the new album and take advantage of other benefits.

Sex, let's talk about it. The Patreon-Slected Space Lizard voted in subject that received more votes than any other subject by far is today. Specifically, the female ejaculation and squirting suck was voted in, and we will talk about that. But we will also talk about so much more. So much sex, who's having sex, what kind of sex are people having?

Are you having more or less sex than the average meat sack? Are you having freaky or sex? Or is it pretty vanilla? Head's up on this one, sex parents. I think you understand this already, but talking graphically about sex today. If you're cool with, you know, giving your kids some sex ed right now, good for you. If you don't want to have to answer a lot, I mean a lot of new questions. You may want to have them sit this one out. Gonna talk about kink today. What kinds of kink are out there? Are you kinky? Why do we like kink? Why do so many people get turned on by getting tied up or spanked or blindfolded or playing dress up? It feels like the right time with so much of the world stuck inside

to talk about sex, porn, sex robots, female ejaculation. I'm going to talk about all that today, I'm going to throw a lot of numbers out, a lot of interesting information and fun coming your way. Luciferina is interested in what we have to say today, very interested. It's the sexiest suck're listening to Time Suck. Happy Monday, Meat Sacks. I'm Dan Cummins, aka The Suck Master. The shelter in place, court jester, mama Ridgeway's and you dearest meet sec. You're listening to time suck

Welcome to the cold to the curious hell Nimrod praise boat jangles glory be to triple M and Lucifina Lucifina, how about you put on that latex body suit and get out the handcuffs in the whip. This Don wants a sub Shit's getting interesting today, my lady Real quick apology last week Amy Jean who helped clear up a lot of information for the pandemic, pandemic suck last week, not a nurse. She's a PA, a physician's assistant, totally different medical job. I am ignorant to all the titles. So dammit, Lucie, Fina, Why did you make me say nurse? So sorry, Amy, and thank you again for your help. And thank you all for your continued ratings and reviews. Thanks to all the new listeners who have hopped on board during the change in schedule,

many have undergone of late. Thanks for checking out my new standup special. Get out of here, devil. Won't be available for a few weeks yet on video. I won't be able to buy the audio for a few weeks, but you can listen to the whole thing for free on Pandora right now. And thank you Pandora, man, Drew Miller Pandora,

always been so good to me, much appreciated. Link in the episode description to that. Link also to this album on my Instagram profile at Dan Kelman's comedy. Also check out the awesome and really inspiring podcast documentary, a mediocre documentary with Tom and Dan on Amazon Prime. It just went on prime. It's so good. It's free to stream for your Prime member. Uh, their story that they lay out in the doc is the story that inspired me to launch into the podcast world. Tom and Dan from a mediocre time, Florida's best podcast, one of the best podcasts in the game. And they still inspire me. They're the pod fathers. To me, at least they're, they're my pod fathers. Also, uh, speaking of great podcasts,

I will be on Andrew Santino's Whiskey Ginger podcast. Andrew and I have had mutual friends for a long time, many other years ago, I thought he was very funny for a long time. Great actor, currently starring with the incredibly successful underground rapper, Lil Dickie on FXX, FXXX's Dave. It looks like a good show, and I'm gonna Skype in, drink some whiskey, for a little dicky on FXX, FXX's Dave. It looks like a good show.

And I'm going to Skype in, drink some whiskey, bullet, rye, and ginger ale. One of my favorite drinks, actually. So I'll be on a whiskey ginger, if all goes according to plan on the 10th of April, been weird in the badmagicmerch.com store for a while now. And I love weird. But back to some classics this week. I get that not everybody wants to wear a T-shirt with my head in a lady's body,

where you can see her pubic hair, which is a shirt we've actually done. Gosh dang, I'm gonna hack. So this week, a blue with gold letters, shirt just saying time suck, nice and simple. Made out of 200% imported pangolin scales, because I got them at a great price. They're on sale for some reason.

Also a new classic black T with my face from the logo. If you like a graphic tea, all slight to keep it simple. Also made out of 200% imported pangolin scales. Because again, for whatever reason, that's shit is cheap right now. Thanks to all the time suckers who joined Patreon, started listing to the weekly secret suck became space. Because of you, we are able to give $5,000 this month to a COVID-19 inspired charity, Meals on Wheels. Meals on Wheels has set up a special COVID-19 response fund. Here's their official statement regarding that. Vulnerable seniors are at the greatest risk amid COVID-19, local Meals on Wheels programs are on the front lines every day focused on doing all they can to keep older Americans safe and nourished and communities across the country.

The cost and efforts needed to protect seniors from COVID-19 require additional emergency funds. And that is why we are asking federal lawmakers, corporations, foundations, and the general public to remember these vulnerable seniors in our national response. What is wheels on wheels? Wheels on meals. Wheels on meals. Wheels on meals is a different thing that I just started. Meals on wheels delivers meals to individuals at home who are unable to purchase or prepare their own meals. They delivered to those 60 year older who are disabled, homebound, who have no one available to aid with meal preparation

and are unable to leave home without the assistance of another person. So we all know some seniors or we are a senior, you know, I know some of you. And seniors, some of the, you know, people most at risk of being harmed, you know, by COVID-19, people who need to really make sure to avoid contact with others who need to stay inside, but they still gotta eat, they still need food,

they still need a little bit of socialization. And that's what meals are, we need to stay inside, but they still gotta eat. They still need food. They still need a little bit of socialization. And that's what meals on Wheels is for. And the link will be in the episode description for that. If you want to check it out further. So hail, Nimm Rodward, help and put food and people's bellies. And now, you know, let's get to fucking. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ So much to talk about today.

I learned so much and not even joking. This is definitely gonna improve my sex life. So much to talk about today. I learned so much and not even joking. This is definitely going to improve my sex life. Lindsey and I are already having some good conversations about all this. Gonna go over a lot of sexual statistics up top. How do our sex lives in American compared to the sex lives of Americans in the 1940s, 1950s?

That was when America's sex lives really first began to be studied. How do the sex lives of Americans stack up to the sex lives of other people across the world. Gonna talk about King, as I said, what type of fetishes do people have? What's out there? Gonna talk about porn.

Is it bad for us? Gonna be good for us? What do the studies say? What do I think? Gonna talk about sex robots. You know I love a sex robot. What is the future going to bring to our sex lives? And will it be the best thing ever? or will it be the end of our species? Not joking or

both. I'm going to talk way too much about pony play. God dang, I fell into a pony play fucking hole this week and I want to drag you in with me. I don't want to be alone down there. Finally, I'm going to talk about my own sex life by interviewing my wife, Lindsey and just also get a female perspective on on sex. And I know that this is now two weeks in a row where I've done an interview. Is that a new normal? No. For your traditionalist suckers, don't worry.

Not changing the show format. I'll probably be a long time before I have another guest on. It's just the way the topics worked out. It felt weird to do an episode about disease, but the pandemic and not talk to a disease expert when that opportunity arose. And it felt weird not to bring in a female perspective on sex when I can do that. And yes, baselessers, I will also talk about female

ejaculate and squirting. So let us begin. I like it to number, but it's here we go. Big thanks to the Kinsey Institute.org for compiling so many sexual statistics in one place. The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University was founded by Alfred Kinsey, an American biologist, professor of entomology, zoology, and sexologist, who in 1947 founded the Institute for Sex Research at Indiana University. His studies most famously published as his Kinsey reports, controversial at the time,

very controversial, heavily influenced social and cultural sexual values in the US as well as internationally. Sexual behavior and the human male was published in 1948, followed by sexual behavior in the human female in 1953. And it was the first time, you know, really in the human male was published in 1948, followed by sexual behavior in the human female in 1953. And it was the first time, you know, really in the world that sex had been studied so scientifically. Kinsey widely regarded as the first major figure in American sexology, the study of human sexual life

and relationships, blue people's minds in the 40s and 50s with the sexual findings he discovered. In an age when pre-marital sex was much more taboo than it is now. He reported, for example, that between 67 and 98% of men had had pre-marital sex, depending on socioeconomic status,

and around 50% of women had engaged in pre-marital sex. So, hey, I lose to Fina. People heading out to those Saka parking lots, poodle skirts getting pushed up over knit cardigans in the back seats of Chevy Bell airs across the land. For those of you born in the 70s and 80s, that means your grandparents weren't waiting for the wedding bells to get hot and heavy, hard and wet. Dr. Kinsey recognized that a lot of these sexual acts that were frowned upon in polite society. And you know, really weren't talked about publicly, were regularly taking place behind closed doors.

For example, he reported that 48.9% of married couples engaged in oral sex and 11% of married males had had anal sex. So think about that. Your sweet papa heading round to Parkes, Salami truck and Nana's back alley. Maybe heading round to his fishing buddy, Dale's rear dock. See if he could slide a sausage boat in back there, you know, one in ten chance. Dr. Kinsey also found that around half of married men had had extra marital affairs. And 69% of white men, I guess those were the dudes he studied the most back.

And you know, it was the segregated time he lived in. 69% of those white men paid to have sex with prostitutes. 69%. That number is way higher than I expected it to be. And I am aware that, you know, many of you probably sweat, huh? 69. I get it. I get it.

I get it. I had to fight it myself. Back in the conservative, wholesome, leave it to beaver and father knows best 1950s when TV married couples were sleeping in separate beds. He reported that 62% of women said they masturbated. Ah, gee, Wally, why is mom making those weird noises in the shower? She must have the water turned up too hot. All that moaning, sounds like it's really herding her.

Americans were a lot freaky in real life. Then they were on TV in the 40s and 50s. What about today? Today almost everyone on TV seems to be fucking late night hosts make casual anal sex references, hardcore porn, double penetration ATM. All the few clicks away on everyone's phones. I googled porn hub sex categories,

clicked the sex categories menu link, and then the top most relevant video was titled, he fucks my tight ass until I squirt 4K. Now did I watch this video? No. I was researching a ton of shit, you know, and I didn't have time for that. So I skimmed it. I skimmed it. I went into the good parts. I just wanted to make sure that it followed through on what was promised in the title. I like honesty and advertising. I like to be thorough. So if you are curious about that particular flick, it did, from my observation, appear that she had a tight ass.

And he definitely fucked it. There's no question there. And she for sure squirted. And it did appear to be shot in 4K. She had a mole on her upper side that I think she might wanna get checked out. You know, looking at categories. Most are types of people, body types or ethnicity, not types of sexual activity, big tits, Asian, Russian, red head, German, French, Ebony, Latina,

Indian, Brazilian, Arab, small tits, etc. There are a variety of sexual fetishes or types of sexual activity listed as well though. Roll play, strap on, feet, fisting, pussy licking, blow job, pissing, toys, fetish, hand job, anal, double penetration, orgy, bondage, sex and public, you know, et cetera. Everyone with the web browsing device with web or cellular access is a few clicks away from videos and these categories. Videos with titles like and these titles are all pulled straight from page one

of the Pornhub category. This week's most viewed porn videos in the United States. These are the most viewed. I did not make up these titles. I bet your dick is grown since then, older sis, older step sis, Jules Blue Cream Pie. Okay? Fucking my friend friend sister on spring break

all right big-ass stepmom can't go out with coronavirus lockdown so she fux really I'm really picking up on a theme here thick ebony yoga girl ariana aid and takes whitecock oh thank god she doesn't appear based on the thumbnail entitled to be related to anyone she doesn't sex with a young big- breasted mom makes love to stepson. Okay, all right, back to the family theme. Cheerleader coerced into sex with coach and her husband. Now loving the coerced part of that title. Seems a little rabie, but I guess it's just a fantasy.

One more, fucking my thick Latina mom because quarantine for coronavirus. Oh my heck, gosh dang, it's not incest. A lot of taboo break and going on in the popular video of sex, Jesus Christ, a lot of families don't want to, don't want to kink shame as people like to say now, but I find the incest angle a bit disturbing. Like, is that how it has been for a while?

I think so. Or is it more now? Like are just a lot of horny people locked up with their families and mom and stepmom are starting to look a little different? What the flip? But again, this is all fantasy based on any sex study ever recently conducted anecdotal evidence. The most common sex like TV US and hopefully not anywhere else does not appear to be step sister or mom or set mom fucking.

However, experts theorize that cases of actual incest? Could, you know, unlikely are be vastly under reported due to the shame and stigma associated with acts of incest? So hopefully incest is not a common sexual activity anywhere. God, you're God, I hope not. But is the fantasy maybe not so harmless? De porn fantasies lead to committing those same acts in real life. We're going to get into that debate later. The result surprised me.

We'll get into the debate regarding pornographic fantasy. Does it serve merely as a harmless release for people's fantasies or does it increase the viewer's sexual desire, push them towards wanting to turn fantasy into reality? Right now, we're going to get back to data. In this age of easily accessed hardcore sexuality, what kind of sex are people having when they're not being filmed, when they're not being paid for it? Let's go over some recent numbers. The following information is based on data

from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the CDC's National Survey of Family Growth, data gathered from 2015 to 2017. I had a hell of a time fine in the size of the study for this particular set of years, but NSFG studies began back in 1973. And the total sample size based on, you know, previous studies done by the same organization likely to be between 10,000 and 13,000 people. So, you know,

a good size sample. First, let's compare primarital sex in the 40s and 50s versus now with this study's numbers. Kinsey said that 67 to 98% of men had primarital sex, depending on socioeconomic status, and then around 50% of women had engaged in premarital sex. Now, 95% of men and women report having sex before marriage, a high number, but I believe it. So if you waited, you are in rare company. Also, if you and your partner are waiting for marriage, you know, before having sex,

and this partner told you that they'd never had sex with anyone else either before you guys get married. There was a decent chance they may be bullshitting you. Another study conducted in 2018, found after interviewing over 2000 sexually active adults that 29% had lied to a sexual partner about how many past sexual partners they'd had. And that number 29,

it honestly seems a little low to me. Uh, damn, I lost a fever. You said you only had eyes for me. Uh, Dr. Kinsey found that in the 40s and 50s, 48.9% of married couples engaged in oral sex. Right, 11% of married males had had anal sex. How does that compare to now? 89% of sexually active women surveyed in the recent NSFG study married or unmarried had

engaged in oral sex with an opposite sex partner. So we break out the blow jobs big gains big gains and blow jobs over the past several decades. Thank you, porn. Thank you for normalizing that 90% of sexually active men had gone down on their partner. So talk about Tuesday going down is going up. You get a 36% of women surveyed admitted to having had anal sex.

Curiously, I'm not sure Kinsey found out how many women in the 1940s or 50s admitted to anal sex. I could not find that particular data. I found another study that said a 92, 16% of women, you know, said they tried anal sex. So, you know, number more than doubled, anal sex does appear to be on the rise. Now, is that because of all the anal porn out there on the web?

Or is there so much anal porn? Because that's what people were already engaging in and that's what they wanted to see. Well, little classic chicken or the egg, classic dick or the butt. Did the butt come first or did the dick come first? Pun not intended. 44% of men in this recent NSFG study said that they'd had anal sex with the woman at some

point in their lifetime. Dr. Kinsey's, you know, study found that roughly half of men cheated on their wives in the 40s and 50s. And at 69% of white men again, kind of weird, you know, but there's just that dude's had paid for prostitution. How does that compare to now? Well, a 2016 UGov survey of a thousand men of women found that only 12% of men, only 1% of women admitted to having ever paid for sex, uh, very little variance in this study between races, by the way. A few other studies seem to back up to trend. The prostitution may actually be way, way down. In the age of hardcore porn, you know, much less prostitution possibly than there was in

the supposedly wholesome, leave it to be, or father knows best, 1950s. So does more porn equal less prostitution? Possibly. Some sociologists in favor of porn argue that readily available porn in addition to more modern sex toys and sex dolls provide a sexual outlet that does indeed replace prostitution. And yes, we will be talking about sex dolls later. Us fucking sex robot dolls West world West world. Please don't kill us robots.

So what about cheating? You know, I've heard the argument many times that all this porn increases in fidelity. More porn equals more strain, more affairs, more cheating, right? Numbers do not back this up, not even close, actually. I was very surprised. According to the 2017 General Social Survey, conducted by the National Opinion Research Center

at the University of Chicago, one of the largest independent social research organizations in the US, only 20% of men report now to ever having had an extramarital affair. Now, could more people be lying than they were back in the 40s and 50s and skewed the numbers? Yeah, of course. It's possible, but it's highly unlikely. If anything, the social pressure to lie about things like cheating, anal sex, paying for

prostitutes, etc cetera, was much greater back in the much more sexually conservative 40s and 50s. The way to less people seem to be cheating, at least here in America, in the age of hardcore porn, porn advocates would say that porn leads to less cheating because again, it provides a sexually satisfying alternative to cheating, just like it provides a sexually satisfying alternative to prostitution. It's an interesting theory. Before diving into how porn, you know, porn's effects on sexuality, relationships, and society,

before diving further there, let's go over some other numbers from that recent NSFG study. So you can see how you stack up to current sexual American norms. By age 15, 13% of females, 18% of males claimed to have lost their virginity via vaginal intercourse. By age 19, those figures stand at 68 and 69%. So they even out as the teens get older, 40 to 40, 42, 44 year olds were asked how many sex partners they'd had

in their lifetime. The median number of opposite sex partners is 3.4 for women, 6.4 for men. So half the respondents had more partners than that, you know, half had less. 0.4% of 40 to 44 year old men surveyed and 1.3% of that same age in women reported having zero sexual partners. And that's okay. Being a noodle McDryween doesn't mean you're gonna go full McVeigh and become some in-sale determined to attack the public or the government because no one wants to fuck you. Some people, as hard as it is for others to believe, just don't have an interest in sex.

I've had a few friends that we were, I'm like, I don't think, you know, people like, oh man, are they gay? Are they straight? What's going on? I was like, I just don't think they have any interest. I think there's asexual. It is possible to be asexual and it's actually not considered psychologically unhealthy. Going back to Dr. Kinsey, the sexologist, he

rated individuals from zero to six, according to their sexual orientation, from heterosexual to homosexual to Kinsey scale. Zero is strictly heterosexual. Six is strictly homosexual. Numbers 1.5 indicate bisexuality to some degree, but he also labeled 1.5% of the adult male population as X, not on the scale. X indicating asexual. Sticking with recently surveyed 40 to 44 year olds, 22% of women reported only having ever had one opposite sex partner, 10% of men reported only one opposite sex partner, 40% of men reported three to six opposite partners, 30% reported the same amount with women there, 8% of women reported 15 or more opposite sex

partners and 30% of men reported that number. Big variants there between genders. Some of the women in that 8% must be working overtime to kick up the numbers for 30% to the dudes. Now, or around 22% of those dudes are full of shit. How many women have you slept with, Noodle? Ha, shit. Thousand. Maybe 2000. That fuck. And that's this year, motherfucker. That's this year. Those, that's this year. Those in the 25 to 44 age group report to following numbers for other types of sexual experience.

12% of women report having had at least some same sex sexual experience, 6% of dudes report having had at least some same sex sexual experience. So now we have a feel, you know, for current norms regarding what kinds of sex people are having. We'll get more into kink later. You know, what about frequency? How often are people having sex?

2.3 times a day is the average. So if you're only having sex, say a couple of times a month, you might as well retire that ruster, you'll dick or man, you'll push. You know what I mean? Put it in the box, write no longer in service and throw it in the fucking basement loser. JK! JK meets Axe. I jump over funsies.

No, according to the general social survey, the average American adult has sex about 60 times a year, a little more than once a week. If you're not having near that much sex, do not despair. The same survey asked questions about overall happiness. And interestingly, it found that people who didn't have any sex at all in the past year were just as happy as those who did have sex in the past year. Also frequency of sex changes over the course of a person's lifetime, as you would expect. In the 44 to 59 age group, 88% of men, 72% of women still getting wet and hard. Still swinging that mead

hammer. Still still fill those flesh holes. Uh dudes in that group, you know, are hitting money shots about seven times a month women getting around, uh, six and a half semen deposits a month. In the 57 to 72 age group, 72% of men are still slanging that dick. Still swinging those man nuts. Still got a little bobbin weave left in that one-eyed prize fighter. 45% of women age 57 to 72 still getting their role changed. Still testing the shocks on the old chesticles. Dudes in this age group, putting some lady lotion on the Vainey fly rod about 4.3 times a

month. Women getting that gray hedge trimmed about 3.8 times a month. And yes, I know I have an eighth grade sense of humor about this shit and I love it. The National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior asked people what sex acts they had done in the past month, the past year, ever in their lifetime. Right? So what's going on there? What's the start with the youth?

What's going on the 25 to 29 year old camp? These numbers are based on sexual activity that occurred in the previous year only's going on the 25 to 29 year old camp? These numbers are based on sexual activity that occurred in the previous year only. I'll just stick to the year. There's too many numbers to go over all of them. Let's start with masturbation. Plain little five on one, paddling the pink canoe, burping the worm, flicking the bean.

Audition those finger puppets, spreading that bearded, spearing that bearded clam, you get it. 69% of men are jerking it. That seems low to me. Any number lower than 100% seems low to me for 20 somethings beating their mate. Beatin' it like they fucking killed their parents. Only 69% of young dudes out there flattening their curves.

Hmm, 52% of 20 something women reported put it on a one woman EDM festival, two finger DJ competition. Maybe sometimes it's two handed competition. Maybe sometimes one hand's using a few fingers. The other hand's holding some kind of vibrating electronic device. Maybe one hand's hitting the clit,

like it just said, something highly offensive and then it just kept saying over and over to regular pace for about 10, 50 minutes. 74% of both men and women age 25 to 29 reported regularly engaging in vaginal intercourse. 46% of men, 5% of women in this age group reported receiving oral sex from a woman. 40% of men, 1.1% of women reported giving oral to a woman. Odd variation when it comes to the post-licking stats.

Seems like a lot more women are getting their pussy licked by other women than they are licking some other woman's plus. What's going on there? Seems to be a giver shortage. Seems to be a receiver surplus. getting their pussy licked by other women, then they are licking some other woman's plus. What's going on there? Seems to be a giver shortage. Seems to be a receiver surplus. Sounds like a couple of poor women's tongues are about to fall out of their heads, a couple women about to file workman's comp claims, and head to the doctor with job pain and bad

backs. 1.2% of men, 36% of women in this age group report receiving oral sex from a dude, 2.7% of men, 50% of women report giving blowjumps. Uh, finally, 0.9% of men, 5.3% of women report receiving anal sex, while 10% of men report inserting their penis into another's anus, male or female. That number seems low to me. 44% of men in the same study reported inserting their penis into an anus at some point, but only 10% in the 20-year-old camp there had done it in the past year.

And I guess that actually does make sense because if you don't do it right, you're not getting invited back. Towards the end of this suck, I'll share some sex tips that I've found about how to live your best life and bed, including how to have anal sex. Two quick hints now, use lots of lube and fucking slow down. Anal sex is not the time to try and see how fast your hot rod goes from zero to 60. Not the place to peel out and burn some rubber.

Okay, now let's talk about kink. This is my favorite part. Hey, Lucifina, I feel the sexual side of our sultry goddess strongly right now. Lucifina loves kink. We went over the basics of sexual activity, but how many people are getting whipped? How many people are getting freaky? Debbie Herbennick, an applied health science professor and sex researcher at Indiana University's

Kinsey Institute conducted the sexual exploration in America study in 2015 with several colleagues. For the first time, Herb Herbert Nick says, this study established a baseline for this is the percentage of Americans who have engaged in spanking or public sex or three sums or what have you. More than 2000 adults, 18 and older, mostly heterosexual participated in an online survey that required about the relationship status, sexual orientation, how recently that engaged in and how appealing they found a variety of sexual behaviors. So let's take a purvy little peak and what was discovered?

Are you a toe liquor? You like those toes? You like those little piggies? Like to put them in your mouth? If you are statistically odds are you're a dude. 25.6% of those surveys said they had lick the partner's toes, only 10.9% of women reported doing

a little toe licking. And I get it if they're looking at dudes' toes. Women seem to be hitting the pedicures a lot more often than dudes. Like I think Lindsey has very sexy feet. She has a great job taking care of them. Pedicures, lotion, foot massages, doesn't fuck around with her feet. My feet are horrific. My feet look like I was cursed by a fucking witch.

And I was turned into part swamp troll or part hobbit. My toes are hairy and mangled. My feet look like I got stuck in a World War I trench for several months, got some foot rot, some trench rot. When I wear flip flops, I hear a baby cry. I assume it's probably because a baby just saw one of my fucking monster feet. Who would want to suck those toes?

I don't know, but not me. You like it and tied up? If you find that thought very appealing, even odds as to whether you are a man or a woman, 8% of men, 9% of women, let me report like being tied up. Do you like it rough? This is more common than I thought.

14% of men, 12% of women say that they like rough sex very, very much. What about lingerie? How many sexually active women have ever worn some form of lingerie at some point in their life? 75.4%. Nice, fish nets, heel boots, corsets, crotchets, panties all day.

What about sex in public? 45.4% of dudes, 42.9% of women surveyed reported, having sex in public at some point in their lives. However, only 6% of dudes and 4.7% of women reported having sex in public in the past year. And that variance actually does make sense to me. Because I wonder how much of public, the public sex being had was done in the sense of engagement and some kind of kinky voyeurism or exhibitionism, I guess exhibitionism is the appropriate term there, versus how much of it was done when people were younger, when they were like teens, because having sex at home just wasn't an option, because they would get caught by a disapproving family member.

Also, I'm apparently kinkier than I realized. So far, I've done all this at some point. Oral anal, premarital, the higher end with partners, feet, bondage, lingerie, public, you know, sex, sex with various types of animals, you know, you know, the stuff we talked about getting defecated on, defecating on others, having someone hit me in the balls with a rubber mallet while someone else shocks my dick

with the cattle prod and then a third person sticks a Roman candle and my ass and lights it while three other people sit behind a scores table and hold up scores of one to 10 based on how well they think i reacted showbiz that is how they do it in the Hollywood uh... kidding about everything from animals on not kidding about anything i uh... said before i feel like albert fish if he were alive today would find all of this terribly boring

like well once i'm reading the paint of a but i what someone didn't crazy uh... i was worried that I would be so boring. I feel like so far, I don't feel too boring. I feel like Luciferin is pleased with me. 25.8% of guys have role played at some point in their life. 21.8% of women have role played. And I could work on this a lot.

I am fucking terrible at role play. Like really bad. I have a hard time staying in character and I wanna laugh all the time. All of my instinctive character choices veer towards absurdist comedy, which is not sexy, which is not great for the bedroom. You know, hard to pull off being

like some smooth character, like, so, it's looking about your drink. You know, I think I know what you like since I spent the past few years spending two to three nights a week hiding in the bushes in your backyard. What, what, how did I ruin it? Come on, I thought I'd play

the mentally unstable creepy stalker who finally found you in the bar. That wasn't what you wanted. What about whipping? Who wants to be playfully whipped by their partner or to playfully whip their partner during sex? 16.2% of men, 13.8% of women report experiencing this at some point in their lifetime. And what about getting spanked?

29.5% of men report receiving at least one sexual spanking in their lifetime. 34.1% of women reported receiving at least one sexual spanking in their lifetime. 10% of women had received a sexual spanking in the past month, just in the past month. So what's with all the spankings? Some of us meet sacks have gotten hard and or wet over a good ol' faction smack to the ass for a long, long time. Gonna do a little deeper dive on spankings right now.

1960, an Italian archaeologist named Carlo Morello-Larecci descended into some tombs in the towns of Tarkuina and the Cropolis and the refined Atruscan civilization that inhabited ancient Italy from about 3,500 BCE until it's assimilation into the Roman Empire or Roman Republic of Ista in the 4th century BCE. Aside from bodies, he found countless frescoes depicting male boxers, sexualized female dancers, and in what's known as the tomb of the floggins, he found all kinds of erotic frescoes.

One image he found is an image of a nude woman bent over holding the hips of a smiling bearded man while a young man happily whips her ass from behind. Oldest known example of an erotic spanking. It dates to roughly 490 BCE over 2,500 years ago. Late 19th and early 20th century, Austrian psychoanalyst, future suck subject, Sigmund Freud, he thought that sexual spankings

were related to childhood spankings, believing that the punishment early on could lead to sadomasochistic sexual preferences and adulthood. And I want to say fuck you, Freude. I feel like Freude single-handedly messed my head up about spankies. Until this episode, some degree, Freude was somewhat obsessed with linking childhood

parental relationships to adult sexuality. Most notably in his infamous edibus complex, which I remember studying a bunch back on as a psych student, the positive edibus complex refers to a child's unconscious sexual desire for the opposite sex parent and hatred for the same sex parent. And then there's the negative as he called it, edifice complex, referring to a child's unconscious desire for the same sex parent, hatred for the opposite sex parent.

He thought that all kids were sexually obsessed with their parents. Freud considered a child's later identification with their same sex parent to be the successful outcome of this complex. And he thought an unsuccessful outcome could lead to neurosis, pedophilia and homosexuality. And no one really believes in most aspects of this complex today. It was just a theory of Freud's. He lived a long time ago and he made some valuable contributions to the understanding of human consciousness and the subconsciousness.

He also said a bunch of crazy shit. If adult sexual is not tied to childhood parental relationships as much as Freud thought, why do so many of us get turned on by a smack to the bottom? Science seems to offer some answers. Biologically, when a person enjoys a sexual act, their brain releases dopamine, the neurotransmitter that heats up the brain's reward and pleasure centers. So if someone enjoys being spanked or doing the spanking,

the dopamine release signals to the brain to keep going. Continue, keep spanking, hurts so good. But why does anyone's dopamine get released from a spanking specifically? A something that some people view as solely as a painful act? Well, Dr. Rebecca Plants, an associate professor at Ithaca's's, Ithaca College's Department of Sociology, she tried to answer this question in her study, sexual

spanking, the self and the construction of deviants in 2006. One thing she points out right away is that there isn't just one reason that people like to be spanking. This kind of goes for all kink and all the say, you know, it's a vast variety of reasons why we do these things. So she said, there's not just one reason. There's different reasons for enjoying it. It's like there's different ways of being spanked. She talks about, there's the basic hand-to-ass motion during sex, a couple lighter taps, you know, when having, quote, doggie style sex, there's the bent over the chair, cane or paddle to the ass type of spanking.

Uh, there's of course the, uh, having somebody tie you up to a tree, facing the tree, and then they get 12 friends, uh, to, uh, all dressed up like clowns and then all 12 clowns get whiffleball bats and they pile into a geometro and they drive around the tree to confuse you. And then they all pile out unexpectedly and they all fucking hitting the ass with the bass is, is hard as they can. And they pile back in the end and then you come as soon as they start to drive off and they're like, ah, they clown me. Ah, you guys, you guys clown me.

You know, there's that kind of spanking we all know about. Back to being serious now, some of the pleasure in being spanked might have a lot to do with the unique physical anatomy of the buttocks, of the buttocks. You know, part of it's just that simple. Dr. Plant says, you're talking about this fairly well protected muscular region of the buttocks. You know, part of it's just that simple. Dr. Plant says, you're talking about this fairly well protected muscular region of the body. That's right at the base of the spine where there are quite a bit of nerves, so it's sensitive.

So it's sensitive, but it's cushioned. So part of it is that, you know, it's just a good place to hit, not hurt somebody in a, you know, like with a bone or something. Dr. Dulcina Pidagora, a licensed psychotherapist, sex therapist, and former New York City dominatrix who refers to herself as the kink doctor offers other possibilities. When asked, why do you think spanking is such a popular sexual activity? She says, because it's something everybody knows about. It's easy for us to talk about.

In our culture, a lot of us grew up with the threat or actuality of spanking as kids for punishment. There's an inherent power dynamic in that when you're a kid. Okay. So maybe Freud was on something sometimes. Spanking can be part of a BDSM sexual relationship. A BDSM being bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism, masochism. The person being spanked will be the sub or the submissive.

The person doing the spanking will be the DOM or the dominant. And in an interview about why she liked it, one sub said, I'm really a type A independent person in my daily life. I'm future driven. I'm organized. I'm confident. I'm loud and outgoing. In order to give up and control or in order to give up control and relax,

I have to make an effort. Being submissive allows me to give up control. That makes sense. It's like a lot is good to me. It still doesn't fully answer the question, though, like why specifically be spanked in that situation? And essentially, there is no one answer. For some, it just feels good. For others, they might just want to try something new. It's something that they heard of. For some, it's part of that whole submission, letting go, not being in control.

That is sexually satisfying. It can also be a part of rough sex. Why do people engage in what's called rough sex? Sometimes the answer there can be as simple as just to alleviate boredom. Humans, men and women alike have a tendency to grow tired of sexual routines. We need to keep mixing things up in order to maintain sexual excitement, a phenomenon, sex researchers, refer to as

the Coolidge effect. I love learning about the Coolidge effect this week. When our interest in sex starts to wane, exposure to a new kind of sex or new partner has a proven way of bringing it back. This phenomenon formally dubbed the Coolidge effect got its name from a popular anecdote about a visit that US president Calvin Coolidge and his wife supposedly made to a chicken farm. And the story goes something like this, a little old-timey language here. Mrs. Coolidge observing the vigor with which one particularly prominent rooster, covered hen after hen, asked the guide to make certain that the president took note of the rooster's behavior. When President Coolidge got to the hen yard, the rooster was pointed out and

his exploits recounted by the guide, who added that Mrs. Coolidge had requested that the president be made aware of the roosters prowess? The president reflected for a moment and replied Tell Mrs. Coolidge that there is more than one hand. Oh Calvin you rascal you So do you see what he's saying there? He's like why why was the rooster so sexually amped up not because there was more than one hand? Now he's getting after some variety the Coolidge effect has been documented in several animal species for instance research has found that when a male rat is placed inside a cage with several female rats that are in heat, he will mate with all of them until he appears exhausted.

However, if a new female is then introduced to the cage, males often experience an immediately renewed interest in sex in the begin mating with her. And I gotta say, I do get it. New is fun. I used to feel guilty I do get it. New is fun. I used to feel guilty for thinking that, but it is science. Or wired to think that, or wired to want new. The coolage effect has been documented in humans.

For instance, in one study, male participants were either exposed to constant or very sexual stimuli. While there were levels of sexual arousal was measured by a device that recorded changes in their penile circumference. So how hard are they getting? The men who repeatedly shown the same stimuli showed less arousal over time. They just kind of got over it.

The dudes who were exposed to varied stimuli maintained higher levels consistently of arousal. Just variety alone kept them more sexually excited. Another study found that after watching porn clips featuring the same actress over a period of several days, exposure to porn featuring a new actress was linked not only to faster ejaculation, but also to the release of more active sperm, faster, bigger, money shot, just because it was a new person they were looking at. This suggests that the Coolidge effect may have an evolutionary explanation behind it. And then it might potentially increase men's odds of reproductive success with a new partner. Men are hardwired to want to spread our DNA to new partners.

Doesn't mean we should cheat in relationships, you know, where it is an agreed upon no, no, you know, you can't be like, baby, baby, don't be mad. I don't want a fucking neighbor lady. I needed to. I had to. That's probably not going gonna be too well received. The Coolidge effect also has been documented in females, although the pattern tends to be somewhat less pronounced.

For instance, research on female hamsters found that after mating with one male hamster until exhaustion, they would demonstrate a renewed interest in sex if a new male was introduced to the cage, just like the rats, you know. Also, research on women has found that just like men, they show some degree of habituation and response to repeated presentations

of the same erotic stimulus, right? If they're shown the same images over and over again, they also get bored, which is what this tells us is the coolant's effect is not uniquely a male phenomenon, not by any stretch of the imagination. So I guess my wife, Lindsay, could also say, what I just said, you know, she'd be like, I didn't wanna fuck that personal trainer, I had to.

I needed to. It's evolution. Damn, Luciferina. As you might imagine, the Coolidge effect has important implications for our romantic relationships, especially long-term monogamous relationships. You know, in particular, it suggests that declining sexual interest in a long-term partner and being excited by variety is probably to be expected, rather than assigned that there's something wrong with you or your relationship. So what can a couple do to combat this potential decrease in sexual interest?

Well, you can start having sex with other people. Swing baby swing! I can fuck the neighbor, then you can fuck the trainer, problem solved. No, that is obviously one way to kick your libido back up. And it doesn't work for a lot of people for obvious reasons. Geology and security, what if my partner leaves me for the new person, fear of STDs, etc. So another way to combat the kool of effect is to try new things like spanking. Now, we're back to spankings.

Everything always circles back to spankings. That's the main takeaway from this episode. Life is spankings. Print that. main takeaway from this episode. Life is spankings. Print that. No. But seriously, novelty in all forms, not just new partners can breed sexual excitement. As some evidence of this research has found that the long term couples who report having the most intense feelings for each other are those who engage in the most new and exciting activities together. In other words, you could potentially stimulate the same level of sexual excitement that you might receive from a new partner by just bringing more novelty

into your existing relationship. So clearly, this cool is effect. Could explain a lot of people's interests in various types of kink. Why get spanked? Why, you know, because why get whipped, whatever, why have a lady dressed in latex push you to the ground and then make you dog food without using your hands and tell you your nasty little piggy and tie you up and take your temperature with a rectal thermometer, even though you've made it very clear that you don't feel favorish. And you just want to go home. Uh, no, because you're fucking bored.

No, because your brain, not just your dick, your pussy, is hardwired to want to try new things, to enjoy trying new things. There's a region in our meat sack midbrains, called the substantiate nigra, ventral segmental area, or SNVTA. It contains dopamine producing nerve cells. And again, dopamine, you know, one of the field good chemicals in our brain, interacting with the pleasure and reward center of our brain dopamine along with other chemicals like serotonin and endorphins, you know, plays a vital role in how happy we feel. And this SNVTA is essentially the major novelty center of our brain.

It responds to novel stimuli. The SNVTA closely linked to areas of the brain called the hippocampus and the amygdala, both of which play large roles in learning and memory, the hippocampus compares stimuli against existing memories. While the amygdala responds to emotional stimuli and strengthens associated long-term memories. And some researchers did a study using an MRI to monitor how the brains of different subjects reacted to being exposed to images.

They had not seen before. They didn't have memories of, you know, or sorry, there was those images, you know, once they hadn't seen before versus images they had seen before. And they discovered that dopamine pathways in the SNVTA are activated for sure when we're exposed to novelty. And now when it makes sense to me, I love learning something new. That's literally the main reason I started this podcast

back in 2016 to learn something new. Hail Nimra. Try something new like Spanking can be fun just because it's new. Can it also in some cases be deviant? Can longing for a savage ass spanking be related to past sexual trauma, can it be related to childhood sexual abuse? Yeah, I mean, in some cases, sure, but important to know that in what seems to be the overwhelming majority of cases, getting kinky doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you at all. Hence the term king

shame. It doesn't mean that it has anything to do with your childhood. It can just mean your adventurous, the like, let him go control, or, you know, who the fuck cares? It just feels good. Stop over analyzing all this and just let me come in peace. Important to note that being kinky though, doesn't mean you're damaged. If you want to get spanked because you truly hate yourself and you think you're worth this piece of shit, not a boy or not a girl, and you need a good weapon, you know, and that's what actually happened to you as a kid, thened because you truly hate yourself and you think you're worth this piece of shit, naughty boy or naughty girl, and you need a good whooping, you know,

and that's what actually happened to you as a kid, then yeah, you should get some therapy. But if you just like the way it feels, if you just like let him go, just enjoy it. How does fuck? And people more educated than me think it's healthy. Okay, so now that we understand the motivation for at least many, when it comes to kink, what other forms of kink are out there? According to that survey of more than 2018 and older, mostly heterosexual adults, I was talking about it that led us to spanking 6.3% of men, 5.2% of women have gone to a swingers party at some

point in a lifetime. 11.5% of men, 6.3% of women have engaged in group sex with a group of four or more people. And 17.8% of dudes and 10.3% of women have been in a threesome. Damn it. Missed out on that. Missed out on the threesome and now that ship may have sailed. Lindsey and I, I think are both two jealous to give that one a go. I used to joke around, you know, about it with Lindsey, but if we ever had another woman coming to bed with us, I'll be so nervous about Lindsey getting in your sad or angry that

I wouldn't be able to do anything. I'd be way too in my head. It would end. It would end with Lindsey having some big heart to heart with, you know, Lindsey and I having a big heart to heart. One or both of us crying. And then the third person just awkwardly putting their clothes back on, slipping out quietly and then telling all their friends about the two fucking lunatics they went home with. And zero interest in bringing in another dude. We have a one dick bedroom capacity. Sorry,, that's just one room for one digging here.

I'm gonna get out of here. You gotta have the right psychological makeup in relationship dynamic to pull off a threesome, not destroy the relationship. I know plenty of people can pull it off. I'm not one of them. Okay, so let's group sex. What other types of kink are out there?

There is one, I've always kind of been fast to me with, cuckolding. Yeah, there's cuckolding. Traditionally cuckolding is when a heterosexual couple agrees to both explore the turn-on of the female sleeping with other men, specifically in order to humiliate her male partner. Not for me, but some people love it,

some people have a good shame-boner going on. What is big deal? What's a shame-ber? I thought shame only for soft limp shamecock. No, no, you can deal. Shame isn't just for the limp. Sometimes shame is for the hard. Oh, thanks. Thank you, so come out there. Never think like that. More, more you know. How you bet you can deal? No worries, buddy. No, according to a study that published in late 2017, acting on Cuckolding fantasies can be a largely positive experience for many couples and not a sign of weakness. The emotions surrounding senior partner with someone else can add to the turn on, explained

one of the researchers saying, it's not Cuckolding if there isn't an element of humiliation, degradation or denial. Our erotic imaginations have the ability to turn shame lemons into delicious kink lemonade. Overall, the research team found that for the most part, Cuckolding tends to be a positive fantasy in behavior. Another researcher said it doesn't appear to be evidence of disturbance, of an unhealthy relationship, or of disregard for one's partner. But there's an important caveat. The researchers added, saying we found several personality factors that predict more positive experiences acting on cuckolding fantasies. For those who have a lot of

relationship anxiety or abandonment issues who lack intimacy and communication who aren't careful, detailed oriented planners acting on a consensual non-monogamy fantasy could very well be a negative experience. In other words, not everyone who has a cuckolding fantasy should think about acting on it. Next, kink. Have you ever heard of Sam Nafelia? Ever fall asleep and then wake up to your partner's genitals inside one of your holes? Well, you're with someone who has a strong case of Sam Nafelia. Sam Nafelia, sometimes referred to as sleeping beauty syndrome, is defined as getting a rousal from a person who is seemingly a sleeper unconscious.

This kind of fetish also involves an exchange of power where the person awake is in a dominant position. The key with this fetish obviously is consent. Don't pull the bill codes be here. Consent important with all fetishes. This isn't one where you follow the thought of, that's better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission. No. Do not follow that same logic with anything sexual. This isn't one where you follow the thought of that's better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission. No

Do not follow that same logic with anything sexual if you do follow that logic in the bedroom. You're probably rapist Baby, why are you so mad? I know I know you don't want me to stick it in your butt when you're awake duh I always thought that meant you just don't like it when you're awake That's why I thought it will be fun to try to sneak it in when you fell asleep. Now I know everyone makes mistakes. Some of you they can fall under the larger kink category of roleplay. Next kink. Let's talk about consensually observing others on dress, have sex, or engage in other sexual acts. This isn't to be confused with spying on people without their consent, which is definitely inappropriate and illegal. Consensual voyeurism isn't about consenting to spy on people. It's about getting their consent. So that's, you know, that's important. You know, you can't just keep yourself permission to spy on people.

Officer, why am I being arrested? I agreed to do this. I gave my consent. Listen, listen, I said, then it's okay. You can watch that lady across the street, Jarr. I give yourself permission to spy on people. Officer, why am I being arrested? I agreed to do this. I gave my consent. Listen, I said, Dan, it's okay. You can watch that lady across the street, Jarr. I give you permission to climb up that mabel tree with a long lens camera after dark. And so you're put a nice little ladder on those bale titties and get them so very clean. I said to myself, Dan, it's fine.

Put your hand in your pants, crank one out. No one will see the branch bowing up and down. It's okay. No, you have to get that other person to consent. In this scenario, the person you're observing should enjoy being watched. And they might even put on a show. This can include watching a partner masturbate, going to a strip club together, watching live cam videos together, etc. A consensual voyeur, some typically takes place at a swingers party or at a play party.

Parties where people participate in BDSM activities. Next, kink, urophilia. This is the fetish for people who are sexually aroused by being urinated on, also known as water sports. Often there is a BDSM element at work here too. The person getting peed on is clearly submissive that the people do in the peen, or the person, and I don't know why I added fucking multiple there, why it's a group all of a sudden.

But having someone's pee drip down your body might evoke some feelings of humiliation, which can be a turn on for some people similar to, you know, what we talked about with Cuckolding. Man, man, I gotta say, this is a fetish that I feel like would really piss you off. If you had like an enemy, like what if you had an enemy? You hated so much.

You had fantasized for years about beating the shit out of them. And ideally, you want to beat the shit out of them. And then when they're down on the ground for a good beating, you want to just fucking piss on them. And then what if we had the chance to do that, right? You're living out the fantasy against your lifelong enemy, someone who had done horrible shit to you, right? They burned your house down, they extreme stuff.

They tried to kill your parents. All kinds of super bad stuff, they deserve it. And you finally beat the shit out of them, only discover that the more you beat them, the bigger a boner they get, right? They're, you find out, oh man, they're a huge sexual massacist. And they start pissing on them and they come.

You're like, God damn it! Ah, you're a, you're a failure fetish. That's so frustrating. I'm supposed to enjoy this. But an interesting thing. Yeah, some people enjoy peeing on other, some people enjoy being peed on. A lot of interesting fetishes in kinks, next kink, Macrophilia. Now we're getting more

niche, even more than being peed on. Macrophilia is the sexual attraction to giants or giantuses. Apparently the porn industry has seen increased consumption for this type of porn recently, particularly arousing niches within this sexual interest include being squished against a giant's breasts. Sorry, some of the stuff being crushed by a giant, being dominated by a giant or being physically harmed by a giant. Though some macrophiles may be attracted to real people that are several feet taller for them,

and it'd be a bitch to be like a seven foot tall macrophile. Macrophilia is typically more about the imagination. Most macro file porn is animated. Virtual reality or CGI porn. Porn for those who enjoy imagining and fantasizing about being vulnerable and small and powerless against a huge giant. Now I'm starting to feel pretty vanilla.

Never once have I thought about how hot it would be to have some giant angry woman smash my head between her huge time rest. Olga hates tiny Dan. Olga smash head with thunder boobs. Why tiny Dan of tiny boner? I mean, not, you know, too tiny normal, somewhat proportionally to body size, but tiny for me, for I'm angry tall woman. You know, you get next kink. There's an actra of actra. Oh my gosh, acro tomophilia, a sexual interest in amputees.

In a survey of actra tomophiles, and yes, this group is big enough to be surveyed, leg amputations were preferred over our amputations, amputations of a single limb over double amputations and amputations that left a stump over amputations that left no stump. That's very specific, man, very specific taste. I feel like if you have this fetish,

man, you have to end up doing a fuck ton of swiping on whatever hookup app you're using. If you're looking for somebody, just hour after hour like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, oh, damn, oh, damn, oh, damn, oh, stump, nope, nope, nope, then there was the very rare climate cofelia, which this is ridiculous. Climacophilia is a fetish where the subject experiences erotic gratification when falling down the stairs. I'm not fucking kidding. And I'm not trying to kink shame, but goddamn it. You legitimately might want to see a therapist for this one.

Like, think about it. Come on. If you need to throw yourself down the stairs just to come, you might want to talk to somebody. I just, that's dangerous. I'm so glad I don't have it. to throw yourself down the stairs just to come. You might wanna talk to somebody. I just, that's dangerous. I'm so glad I don't have it. So glad I don't get so horny

that I throw myself down the stairs. And I'm just like, I guess what, laying in the bottom, just jerking off with a sprained wrist or a busted arm. I'll banged up and bleeding on the landing. There's coprophilia. This is a rousal to feces. Shobage!

Pappin' out of that hot fresh peanut butter. That's how you do it in Hollywood. A carapophobia is the attraction to the smell, taste, texture, or sight and sounds of the act of defecation. As a primary means of sexual arousal and gratification, I'm gonna definitely kink shame part of this. This is medically not sound. This is bad. This is bad. I mean, if the attraction folks is on eating the shit, I mean, if you need to smell some shit while you masturbate,

I guess whatever, you know, fine. You know, I heard anyone, you know, I heard yourself. Huge turn off for me to smell something like that, but whatever if you like it, you know, but if you want someone to literally shit in your mouth, no, but I know consuming one's own feces could have potentially harmful consequences as bowel bacteria are not necessarily safe to ingest, even riskier to eat someone else's shit.

I love that I have to say that this year's risks include viral hepatitis, parasitic and testnal infections, and many others. And in a terrible time right now to start acting on this sexual impulse if you have it, do not end up in an ICU bed because you got COVID-19 because you ate someone else's shit. Next, King. There's exhibitionism, arousal from displaying one's generals in public. And this one's tricky. This one's tricky because if you flash your junk to strangers, it's illegal. You might want to see a therapist about this one too before you go to jail for flashing people. I mean, you could get permission, but I feel like that defeats the entire point of flashing somebody.

I feel like this King is a great one for someone to have who spent a lot of time in hotel rooms, right? Right? You just keep, you know, accidentally leaving the lights on. You keep forgetting to close the blinds. Whoopsie. Oh, man, just keep forgetting. You button naked right in front of the window. I totally didn't even realize that you know, you tucked your dick in between your legs and that your dance into cute Lazarus is goodbye horses. Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me hard. I'd fuck me so hard.

Science and Lam's reference if you're confused right now. Next cake, next cake, cake, cake, cake. There's nasolingus, a sexual attraction to sucking on someone's nose. Right? Not for me, but if you want to suck the fuck out of a consenting adult's nose, well, you get after it. You get that nose.

You suck that snoss, you bang that beak. You hunker down on that hunker. Next kink, there is titalagnia. This is a tickle fetish. You get turned on by tickling someone? Well, congratulations. You have a fetish that makes most people want to punch you in the fucking throat.

Super annoying. If Lindsay had this and couldn't control it, I would have to leave her. Right? No, do not fucking tickle me. If you have a tittle agnea, you need to get online and you need to look for somebody who has niece malagnea.

That's someone who is aroused by being tickled. Perfect match made and tickled fetish heaven, which sounds like a weird lame heaven. There's so many other fetishes. There's nebplophilia arousal by smoke or fog. There's the very strange malicephilia, a sexual attraction to bees, wasps, and other stinging insects. Keep stinging, oh, you don't stop. Don't stop, Goddaddy comes. Others, Lissa Filia, a sexual attraction to stone and gravel. Damn, man, look at that sexy ass gravel.

Goddamn, that's the finance granite. Slime a dick on that shale. Fuck that lime stone so hard. There's like my dick on that shell. Fuck that lime's not so hard. There's auto-plessophilia. Getting turned on when you dress up like a giant cartoon stuffed animal. Dude, I'm telling you. I put on that giant teddy bear costume

with the fucking butterfly wings. My dick turns into a cum faucet. There's also the rare but totally normal, totally normal nanopiele lingus. This is a strong desire to fuck nanopieels. Strong desire to be Nanopiles. Strong desire to be a total alpha male fruit fucker. I don't know if this one is really not.

But I didn't talk about having sex with a banana peel in a bathroom of a grocery store I worked at in high school. On my new standup special, I know I talked about it on the podcast before. And apparently I'm not the only one who's done this. Numerous many women have told me after shows or written in messages about sexually pleasureing themselves

in some way with a banana. And I got a lot of emails about this happening. And I got a lot of emails about some doctors online who heard about this so much that they got concerned and they spoke out about how it's not a good idea. Seriously, some doctors have been warning horny men not to masturbate into banana peels after a number of men in online chat rooms and on Reddit threads, et cetera, have admitted to putting bananas on the microwave and then fucking the warm mushy inside of the nana. Some men insist that the slimy peel interior

makes a good lubricant and stimulates the feelings or simulates the feeling of oral sex. I bet it does. Doctors though have said that this act can cause sores, rashes, and infections. As the protein in the fruit skin can cause flare ups in some people, especially on the extra sensitive skin of the penis.

One online doctor, Dr. Diana Gill, from a service called Dr. For You, also warned, a person with a banana allergy is more likely to be allergic to other substances such as latex or other fruits and vegetables. So if you're allergic to latex condoms, you may also be allergic to banana skins. Although rare, you can develop a rash and sores on the penis, which can be painful and can lead to infection. And an extremely rare cases, your dick can turn yellow, develop black spots, and if you don't get it treated, it can turn completely dark, fall off, and if you're not careful, your aunt can find it and bake it into some bread. Of course, I'm kidding about that. One last kink. It's a big

one. Let's talk about pony play oh my heck what is pony play it's a type of role play and also type of bdsm in almost all pony play situations the owner or trainer trainer that seems to be with the common terms played by the dominant and the submissive is the pony ponies are often known as pony girls or pony boys uh... like many forms of sexual role play, the participants may adopt nicknames that they use,

you know, wall participating. Within pony play culture, you know, trainers and ponies have names and you may only know other pony players by these names, you know, that they come up with for the role playing. Like of Lindsay and I were playing and she was the pony, you know, and I was a trainer. I could be say Captain Whiskerhorn. And she could be Sassferilla Spunkmeister. And then, and then, you know, if she was like, Dan, can you pass me some water?

I can just ignore, you know what I mean? Dan, seriously, pass me some water. Ah, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. Oh, for fuck's sake. Can I please have some water capped in whisker horn? Yes, that's for real, a spunk, myster. But only if you need first, only after you take a bite, let's care it. Be a good pony.

Pony plays shares much, but not all of its aesthetic with BDSM gear and costumes. Black leather, PVC swayed commonly used for items both worn and wielded during a pony play session or event, corsets, also sometimes worn as part of intricate pony costumes. And there is also much more pony play, pony person gear. You can buy for your, for your very own, SAS Burrilla Spunk Meister, easy girl, easy girl, reigns to direct your pony. You can get saddles for riders to purchase on and actually ride another human bean. You can get bits that go into a pony's mouth for control and you know to control, you know, like noises.

Tongue ports to hold down their tongue. Britals to attach to your pony to allow the trainer to control their horse. Wooo! Susperilla! Easy girl! Easy girl! Martin Gales to connect the brides to a belt, a harness, can connect a pony to a cart, collars for your pony, you can get hoof boots, hoof boots, one of the legs and feet to give the impression of hooves, you can get hoof mitts, you know, same thing for the hands, you can get polo's wraps, you know, the wrap around the pony's legs, often over the hoof boots, boots to add support, restrict

movement, you know, just for looks, masks to cover the pony's head, you know, you can have like a snout, you know, ears and mane, body suits can incorporate, you know, masks, tails and maines, tails can be also a pony anal plugs, with like an attached tail, pony ears, blinders to block the pony's peripheral vision, you know, oh, sass gorilla, focus, focus girl. Do you want me to put the blinders back on? Are you in fucking Baytention? Rists or ankle restraints, you know, just like real ponies wear. You can get plumes to sit on top

of your head of the stex pony during shows events. Hobbles restraints worn between the calves to limit movement. You can get brushes for the ponies fur crops for giving your pony direction during training or punishment. You can even get spurs. Some trainers wear spurs to help train a stubborn pony. Sasperilla, do not buck. Do not make me get the spurs out. Sasperilla's Spunk Meister. Let's go, yeah, yeah, yeah.

There are specialty retailers that can custom make this stuff. You can spend thousands of dollars on pony play gear. And there's so much more to it. The pony trainer spends time training their pony. There's different types of ponies. You can be a work pony, a breeding pony, riding pony, show pony, event pony, straight up pleasure pony. There's all kinds of pony training guides online until you had to break your wild pony. God, I fucking, this has to be real. I feel like is a horse that's gonna have a tough spirit, you know how to punish your pony Yeah, the hell yeah, I didn't read about a thousand of those guides

Yeah, I have fucking while loose cannon those Sasprilla You know there's stuff about how to tie your pony up and you know there's guys to how to how to fuck that naughty pony Sometimes you gotta fuck your naughty pony Gustang Sasprilla You can take the role of play even further. You can bring, I know this is real for some people, but you can bring a fake vet into the mix.

You can have a group sex situation. God damn it. One person's a trainer, one person's a pony, and another person's a vet, you know? You gotta sick, you gotta sick pony. Oh man, oh man, I'm being so inappropriate. I don't know why my brain went to jail basically.

Oh, Dr. Joe, oh, Stas Brill is got some wrong with your butt. He's got something in there. Oh, I can't see it, oh man, please, please, where's your vet tools? If you don't have any tools, I guess I'll just have to feel around my wing, you know what I mean? Sirius pony plays more than just a king. It's a fucking lifestyle and I don't want a king shame. I really don't if you enjoy pony play. I don't give a shit good for you You know I live once I would just be lying though if I if I tried to to not pretend that I just didn't think that she was hilarious.

I was laughing my ass off watching pony play videos. It's so funny to me. Watching a bunch of pony players all together, this one video may be think of a super perverted Renaissance fair. Is that kind of vibe? It was this video called ponies on the Delta, pony play festival in New Orleans. It's one of the funny things I've ever seen in my fucking life. But keep riding pony people.

Keep letting that freak, freak flag fly. Okay, so let's recap what we've learned so far. In America, blow jobs in anal sex are a lot more common now than they were in the 40s and 50s, but people were still getting freaky back then. And cheating, pain for sex seems to be down quite a bit compared to the 40s and 50s. Primarily sex is way up, but as far as overall sexual morals, you know, when people are like, oh, man, things are falling to shit. No, I don't think, you know, things are any more perverted now than they were back in

the days. I'll leave it to be very and all that. And really, what even is perverted? It's so subjective. What's perverted to one is vanilla to another. One man's pony play is another man's missionary, right? Are people more. Are people more into kink now than the world were half a century ago? Uh, we don't know. Uh, maybe if kink is more popular now and we do know that uh, uh, or we do know that most of it is completely harmless and probably a whole lot of fun.

You know, wanting to be tied up, chokes, bank, play dress up, etc. Uh, does not mean that there is anything wrong with you. You might just like to try something new You might just be less worried about what society thinks, you know Less worried about what people think is taboo and more willing to do whatever makes you feel good And as long as that is consensual and isn't gonna make you physically ill well fucking good on you You hop on your own sasperilous spark miser and you fucking ride like the wind, you know what I mean? Okay, next up What is the rest of the world up to sexually? Let's talk about that right after a quick word from today's sponsors.

And again, thank you for using our sponsors and letting them know you heard about them, you know, through us. Thanks for using our unique URLs and discount codes. So the sponsors know that we sent you there. Today's time, so it is brought to you by the 2020 A-hole Air Banjo Academy's new online course Songs to Airpluck while you train your pony person. Sometimes you need to take a break from Whip and Sass Berilla, you know. Sometimes your hand gets so over all the spanking and sometimes you get sick of the starveen

and you know having to cage your naughty pony lady. So relax, relax, and pluck off some steam. You know, by playing this, this horse-related classic. Mmm, mmm, mmm. That's the perfect song to air-batch do with your, your dudes and pony-blink. Bink, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't think, don't even have to touch the plucket. You don't have to touch it to pluck it. And of course, it's not a sponsor. I've just had that song on my head all day and day, and it makes me laugh. I wanna play it the whole episode. I've been fighting it.

Just all episode long. I just wanna just push that button again. Just. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding left. What I started wondering is I looked into America's sexual interest, was how does the US stack up against the rest of the world? A UK online doctor, sexual wellness website called Dr. Felix, gathered data from various sexual studies, not done around the globe in recent years, let me share some interesting tidbits.

The major English-speaking nations of the UK, USA, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand, for example, share more than just a mother tongue. They're also where you'll find the most sexually adventurous people on the planet. English speakers like to get kinky. More people have used blindfold or masks during sex in these countries in anywhere else in the world. More English speakers use lube than in other countries.

Far more English speakers use vibrators. The trend is reflected in shopping habits, more Google searches for sex toys come up from these nations than from any other nations. Australians may be the most sexually liberated people on the planet. 22% of Australians have shared an intimate moment with somebody of the same sex compared with the global average of just 12%. 17% of Americans report having same sex experiences. 17% of Americans report having same sex experiences. The Danes lead the world in cheating. Wapping 46% of Danish people say they've had an extra marital affair compared to roughly 25% of Americans. Anal sex is so common in Greece right now that many Europeans refer to anal sex according to this, you know, Dr. Felix as doing it Greek.

A report titled sexual behavior, sexual attraction, and sexual identity in the United States, which reportedly pulled thousands of people between the ages of 15 and 44 from 2006 to 2008, reported that 44% of straight men, 36% of straight women admitted to having anal sex at least once, but 55% of Greeks taking into account men and women have tried anal sex at least once. Despite being the home of Kamasutra, right, the ancient Indian Sanskrit text of sexuality eroticism and emotional fulfillment, India seems to be one of the least sexually adventurous nations on earth right now.

Two thirds of sexually active Indians reported never having tried anal sex, a three sum, or to have using a sexual aid of any kind at any point. However, India is also one of the most sexually satisfied nations on earth, which I find interesting. 61% say they're fully satisfied with their sexual lives, beating only by Nigeria and Mexico. What country is the least sexually satisfied?apan only ten percent of japanese people report having exciting sex that's a part of our uh... japanese women are so beautiful too uh... only thirty four percent of japanese folk reported having sex weekly

the next lowest rate is actually the united states dammit fifty three percent of americans report having weekly sex who's doing it the most italians and. And this came out before the quarantine stuff. Isn't because of recent events. 76% of Italians report having sex weekly. I like a depressed. I said, I like to give them a buzz while. Here we go. What country has the most sexually liberated women? According to another study I found, New

Zealand, Ye Kiwis. Kiwi women, according to this study, found New Zealand, Yay Kiwis. Kiwi women, according to this study, have an average of 20.4 sexual partners in their lifetime. That's three times over the global average of 7.3, double the averages of British and Australian women. The average US woman, according to one study, I found only four. And I got to say that number feels very low to me. I will say that number is very pretty wildly from study to study when it comes to the number of sexual partners,

especially the ones that women are claiming. Back to the Dr. Felix study, that study looked to what men and women sexually fantasize about around the world. Interesting results. Here are the most common, according to this assessment of various sex studies, male fantasies, most common male fantasies.

88% fantasize about a blowjob. 85% fantasize about sex with two women. 83% fantasize about sex with somebody that they know who is not their partner. And 82% fantasize about sex in an unusual place. Now let's compare this with women. What do women fantasize the most about around the world? 100% of straight and bisexual women fantasize

about constant and aggressive anal pounding. I fucking knew it, I knew it. 100% of straight and bisexual women fantasize also about sharing their man with multiple women, okay? Interesting. 100% of women want less for play, less talk, and they want to buy a one-way express ticket to quote bone town. Tchoo, choo, all aboard. One-way express heading to bone town for some pounding. Hey, Luciferina, of course I made that shit up.

For real though, what do women, straight women in this case, around the world fantasize about the most sexually according to Dr. Felix, 85% fantasize about sex in a romantic location. 82% fantasize about sex in an unusual place. 76% fantasize about receiving oral sex and 72% fantasize about performing oral sex on a man. So many oral sex fantasies. That settles it. We live in a fantastic world. Now let's talk about porn. Let's talk about porn.

And then let's talk about robots. You heard me. Then we have more pony play to get back and do, not even joking. Then I'm going to interview the queen of the suck, get a female perspective on all the sex. And I promise before it's all over squirting will be addressed. People want to hear the squirt. Um, that was a weird way to phrase that. Okay, let's talk about porn. How does porn affect our sex lives? Uh, porn has been around a long, long time in some form. But I think this is important to think about prior to invention and proliferation of VCRs in the late 70s. Very few people were ever watching porn. Very, very few young men and women were watching a video of other people have sex before

they had sex themselves. Important to note that. Playboy magazine did not come out until the very end of 1953 and it was very tame by today's standards. Artsy nude pics, no sex acts, didn't even show pubic hair at first, no leg spread, no close up waxed and bleached butthole shots. Penhouse got a little race here when they hit the shelves in 1965, but still very tame by today's standards for many, many years.

Hustler came out in 1974, and it was the first mainstream truly hardcore porn pick magazine. Seaman and open it, anal penetration are shown. Penhouse didn't show any of that until 1998. And porn wasn't accessible to every kid with, you know, anal penetration are shown, pen house didn't show any of that until 1998. And porn wasn't accessible to every kid with a computer and a phone like it is now. For so long, it was still images. You know, when the internet first came around,

not 4K video, where it looks like you're looking through a window and watching two people, or way more than 2B, I'll have sex right in front of you. In the 1960s, there was only 20 adult movie theaters in the US showing grainy, cheaply produced, horribly lit, soft, core, 35 millimeter pornos. Adult theaters would never be more, you know, very popular everywhere in America. porn was never truly a huge part of the world sexual culture until the internet and until porn showed up on the internet, the first porn website didn't show up until 1994, sex.com. And it was mostly shitty low resolutions, still images, right?

It took forever to load again on your AOL dial-up connection. Despite the technical limitations, compared to today, 450,000 pornographic images were posted online in 1994, accessed approximately 6.4 million times. And it is, it's just crazy me that that less than 30 years ago That's when porn hit the web You know that people have been regularly watching hardcore porn at home for less than 50 years It wasn't that long ago that our brains were not being constantly bombarded by porn in the late 90s I remember hearing about people going to porn sites on the computer for the first time in the early 2000s

I was still buying the occasional porn Mac You know it was still hot to have access to like 10 new pictures. Now, 20% of all mobile web searches are for porn. One in five of every search on a mobile device is for porn. 13% of all web searches total, 4% of all websites are porn. According to a 2011 Cosmopolitan study called a billion wicket thoughts, 87% of US men between the ages of 18 and 35, look at porn on a weekly basis on the web, right? 2017 alone, porn hub got 28.5 billion visits. In 2018, porn hub got 33.5 billion visits. Also in 2018, 109 billion, uh, over 109 billion videos were watched on PornHub. Over 14 videos watched for every person on the entire planet.

And that's one porn site, one of many. According to PornHub's own site, visiting PornHub is a daily routine for more than 120 million people. And since the worldwide shelter in place measures began viewing has increased dramatically on PornHub across the world by over 61% in Spain, over 38% in France, at one point it was increased by over 57% in Italy, so much porn. And like I established at the beginning of this episode, all kinds of porn, every fetish we talked about today and so many more, hundreds of thousands of videos, millions of images. What is all that porn do into us? What's it do into our brains?

More and more studies are coming out linking high rates of porn consumption and young men in particular to a decrease in overall sexual libido and also to erectile dysfunction. Why? Well, the answer to this question makes a lot of sense to me. For many young people growing up with vast amounts of porn that we now have online, people just hit an adulthood now in the past 10 or so years, or you know, for the past 10 or so years. These are the people, the first people in the history of Earth

to grow up in a world saturated with porn. These people, many of them, you know, at least, grew up masturbating to unlimited porn that's offered today. All of that porn was their first introduction to sex. Their only blueprint for sexual interaction came from watching porn stars have sex. Porn stars are performers. They're acting. That can be a very hard act to follow in real life. Like think about that.

If you're watching video after video of muscled-up dudes with penises that are in the upper five or one percent of the biggest dicks on the planet, guys with these donkey dicks are having sex with multiple women with perfectly aligned labia, perky, you know, symmetrical breasts, tiny, small waist, peach-shaped asses, flawless skin. They're having sex with women who beg for every male centric fantasy ever. They want their partner to stick it in their ass. It's no warm up, you know, it's because that's not that's not shown as edited out. You know, these women want to, you know, give these guys blow jobs with a few of their friends at the same time.

They want to bend willing lean to 10 different positions. No questions asked. I want to share this guy with their with their friends. He orgasms across all their chests, all shot in 4K shot in Hollywood Hills mansion. It's well lit. Everyone looks healthy, happy and super horny. It's a fantasy. It's a fantasy. Everyone looks healthy, happy and super horny. It's a fantasy It's a fantasy, but you're adolescent brain

Processes it as reality or if it doesn't process that video is reality. It does process thousands and thousands of other videos labeled as Quote and quote amateur videos that are not amateur. It's it's the same thing. It's porn stars on porn sets And then that same brain is then looking at the reality around them, right? It's it's seen their average size penis. It's looking in the mirror scene. Maybe, I don't know, actually 10, 20, 30 pounds being carried. This brain's looking at their partner. You know, she doesn't have six pack abs. She's not always, you know, perfectly waxed and bleached. Maybe she doesn't have perfectly perky 19 year old breasts or brand new fake breasts. She doesn't have a lighting kit on her. Tons of makeup, new lingerie and heels.

She doesn't want to invite her friends into the mix, she doesn't want you to cram into her ass with no warmup. She wants to have some foreplay and your brain thinks, what the fuck? This isn't what the girls in the videos were doing. This isn't as good. I don't look like that guy in the video. I'm not as good.

You know, and your guys libido drops, sense of reality has been distorted. Now there's a poor body image, performance anxiety. Maybe he's in his head and this all adds up to a really shitty real life sex life. More and more studies are showing that too much porn fucks up your real life sex life because it just can't compete.

According to a 2014 study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, one out of every four new erectile dysfunction patients is under 40. Extensive research from Holland has noted a sharp increase in the level of erectile dysfunction rates among young men in the last half century in Europe. Back in 2001, 2002, erectile dysfunction rates for men were almost negligible. But by 2011, ED rates in young Europeans aged 18 to 40 range from from 14 to 28% huge jump from, you know, negligible levels, you know, one less than 1% to 28% in places. The Institute of Human Development in Berlin undertook a study examining the likely link

between porn addiction and ED by examining the effect porn has on desensitizing the human brain. The 2014 study of 65 healthy men proved that watching internet pornography for just four hours each week decreases the amount of gray matter in your brain. The part involved in sensory perception, such as seeing, hearing, memory, emotion, speech, etc., they found less neurons and neuron connectivity in the pleasure center of the brain after monitoring male porn habits compared to the brains of those who didn't watch any of it at all.

Too much porn seems to leave the brain craving more explicit material while making it harder and harder for the same images and also for sex and real life to provide the same stimulation. Pornatics are then more likely to seek out more deviant sexual images to satisfy their cravings and to become, you know, really kind of hardcore porn addicts. Remember when I talked about the Coolidge effect earlier? I can stimulate your brain and ignite your sexual interest

by having sex with a new partner or trying something new and bad. Well, what if you can just fucking burn out that part of your brain? The SNVTA that we talked about earlier, the novelty center of your brain. The parts that respond to novel stimuli by kicking out that dopamine. Right? What if you can just burn it out because you've seen everything new? I think if it like, like I love devil's food cake, rich dark chocolate frosting on top of rich dark chocolate cake.

And I like to betty crocker version right out of the box. Delicious. I don't have it very often. Part of the reason I like it so much is because it's special. It's not something I constantly taste. But what if I ate devil's food cake every day for several months? And what if every time I ate it, I had a slice from a cake that had just been made by one of the world's best chocolate cake makers, right?

The finest dark chocolate cake made from scratch are the best cake makers in the biz using the finest artesian flower. If that's even a thing, other amazing best you can use ingredients. And then right after all that, now I'm offered a slice of Betty Crocker cake again. Am I going to like it as much as I used to? Fuck no, it's now the brain works. It's not made by one of the best cake makers in the biz. It can't compete in that sense. And now I'm tired of chocolate cake.

All I've been fucking doing is eating chocolate cake, and I'm over it, at least for a while. That's what I think all this porn consumption can do to you. It can burn out, you know, your brain on real sex. I know that in my past, when I fell into the habit of looking at porn too often, it for sure fucked up my sex life. I got to a place in my head I'm just not even caring about sex or not, because you know, whatever, I just go jerk off to my favorite fantasy.

I could just go eat or virtually eat the best cake ever. Porn, you know, is hard to compete with in real life. With porn, you don't have to connect to the person you're watching. You don't have to compromise in anything. They're never annoyed with you. You have no baggage with them. They never want you to put on more deodorant or brush your teeth. You can have a sexual relationship with sorts with whoever you're masturbating to that you

just cannot have in real life. And it appears this is different as if this difference between a virtual sex life in a real one is causing some young people to give up on real sex entirely, which is scary. In Japan, a 2012 sexual survey found that 36% of teenage men and 59% of teenage women, supposedly universally hormone adult population, expressed no interest or were actively turned off by sex. A 19 and 12% increase over 2008 numbers, respectively. So why? No one knows for sure.

Let me start with that. But some theorized that that arise in porn consumption, specifically a rise in Japan of anime porn consumption and similar types of porn. Porn that doesn't feature actual human beings is the root. Why? Because real human women, real human dudes, cannot compare with somebody who's animated. Like biologically, cannot compare, cannot do the things and illustrator can animate some character to do.

So yeah, porn can be bad. And what about the porn stars themselves? Are many of them being exploited, risking STDs and wanted pregnancies, being paid next and nothing? Yeah, sometimes. Of course, there is a dark underbelly to the adult film world.

What about sexual assault? Now, does that, you know, with lead to more rapes, like this is more violent looking porn lead to more rapes? Well, the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence says, very surprisingly to me, no. Their website points out that men who commit rape and men who don't commit rape both view pornography. Milton Diamond, the director of the Pacific Center for Sex and Society at the University of Hawaii, says there's absolutely no evidence that pornography does anything negative. Although the statistics vary, one 2016 report said that 77% of Americans view pornography

at least once a month. There was that number that was higher than I threw out earlier. At the same time, sexual assault is decreased by 45% in the last 20 years. When you take a population adjustment into account, the number shows a decrease of 55%. So if porn leads to sexual assault and there's so much more porn than ever before, why is there so much less sexual assault? Some think that could change soon.

In recent years, porn has been accused of becoming increasingly violent. A veteran porn star, Anthony Hardwood, great porn name, said in a recent documentary about porn that in the 1990s, it constituted making love and a bed and having lovey W.Sex. But in 2010, researchers analyzed more than 300 porn scenes and found that 88% of them contained physical aggression. Most of the perpetrators were male, targets were female. The latter's most common response to aggression was to show pleasure or respond neutrally. Statistics around how violence towards women has become the most commonly viewed porn are alarming, according to Australian adolescent sexuality expert and researcher Marie Krab. Recent analysis of the most popular porn found 88% of scenes included physical

aggression such as gagging, choking, and slapping. 94% of these scenes, the aggression was directed towards women. Women were slapped in 75% of the scenes, verbal aggression in 48% of the scenes. With all of this relatively new, aggressive porn, will all of it lead to possibly more sexual assaults in the future? Time will tell. Some theorize it will lead to less because it provides a fantasy outlet for those who have the desire to commit sexual assaults that might keep them from doing it real life. Just like it's possible to watch in a lot of porn might keep you from having healthy sex in real life. It also might, you know, keep others from having unhealthy, illegal, and violent sex in real life. And this brings you back to what we talked about earlier with the, with the incest. As all the incest porn currently popular,

going to push more people to commit acts of incest or what is how the opposite effect will allow more people to get it out of their system virtually and not become real life monsters like Joseph Fritzel. World's worst dad we talked about here on Time Psycho Whileback. Okay, so now we look mostly at the ways porn can be bad, can it also be good? According to a 2016 article in the Atlantic, just like I talked about, the ubiquitous of porn has correlated with the drastic decline in sexual abuse towards women. So that is good.

Also, many people watch porn to learn new sexual tricks to try in the bedroom that does make their sex lies better. I've done that. I hosted the Playboy Morning Show, 2015 and 2016. Over 100 episodes, all we did was talk about sex. And I took home some tips, then I tried them, and it was great. Definitely added to our sex life.

A 2008 study by researchers studying hardcore porn's effects on Danish men and women found that respondents construed the viewing of hardcore pornography as beneficial to their sex lives. Their attitudes towards sex, their perceptions and attitudes towards members of the opposite sex, towards life in general, and they know, overall found it very satisfying.

Viewing porn also can be looked as a type of safe sex, unlike real physical sex watching porn to spread to no diseases, leads to zero pregnancies. Using porn to satisfy one sexual needs is a safe free to cheap and inconvenient way to experience sexuality. Porn can actually help foster emotional and sexual intimacy, says psychologist David Schnaurk, the opinion, way to experience sexuality, porn can actually help foster emotional and sexual intimacy

says psychologist David Schnark, author of resurrecting sex, solving sexual problems and revolutionizing your relationship. He says the significant portion of our work and helping couples develop a deeper sexual connection is through erotic images. Erotica, as well as couples on masturbatory fantasies, can be useful tools for helping them develop as adults.

And there's also the view that porn decreases sexual stigma. It leads to less kink shaming, right? It normalizes a variety of sexual behavior and makes people, you know, feel better about what they're doing, you know, makes me think, you know, okay, cool. I'm not the only one doing that. And here I thought, you know, pony play was making me weird. Settle up, that's for real as fuck, myster! It's safe to ride!

Yeah, yeah! Yeah! But seriously, there is the argument that helps normalize a variety of sexual activity, you know, and leaves a lot of people feeling better about their desires. There's also the benefit of helping you figure out what you like and bed, what turns you on, you can learn a lot about your sexual desire via porn before you ever have sex. So now you're hitting the ground running, You can communicate if you can communicate effectively. You know what to ask for.

So porn recap is a good or bad, well it's both. It's probably bad to watch too much. It's probably bad to expect your sexual real life to be a series of porn hub highlights. Probably a good place to learn a few tricks. Probably a great place to not get a new STD, at least if you're not a porn star. And porn is probably a good place to destigmatize formerly taboo sexual behavior.

Like most things in life, I feel like the value in porn lies in how you choose to consume it. Okay, now let's talk about sex robots. Let's talk about future sex. Some version of Westworld is coming. I firmly believe this. New robotic sex dolls are being designed, refined, and built as you listen right now. Wake up, sheeple. Sex robots are coming. We will fuck them. They

will remember and they will kill us all. Dolores is going to be pissed. But seriously, they're getting more advanced all the time. Facial expressions, movements, look, feel, AIs getting more advanced all the time. You know, they can talk, they can in a way think. Someday I think someday soon it'll be hard to tell a companion robot a sex robot apart from a real human. Imagine this not so distant future is pointed out in a June 2019 psychology today article, a totally realistic robot of your own design that is capable of fully carrying out any sex act that you can dream up.

It looks, smells, and sounds incredibly realistic. And your state-sponsored insurance paid for her in full. In effect, she was free, prescribed by your physician to help with your status as officially sexually dysfunctional. Recent federal legislation supported overwhelmingly by a male majority in the House and Senate has made this kind of medical prescription perfectly legal. Rob in the robot never has a headache, never gets cold, never rejects an advance, it is perhaps strangely beautiful in many respects, and surprisingly even seemingly intelligent

and witty. Well, according to an expert clinical psychologist in sex therapists, Mary Ann Brandon, what I've just described is in fact a likely portrait of our near future. In her presentation at the 2009 AEPS symposium, applied evolutionary psychology society, Brandon made a strong case suggesting that sex robots are truly in development and on the way perhaps in a decade or two. Brandon pointed out several potential problems that may well come along with robots. Men already disproportionately represented as consumers of pornography will likely be overrepresented, overrepresented as consumers of sex robots within committed relationships, sexual interactions, which many studies point to being on a nationwide and

possibly worldwide decline will drop further. Intimacy in relationships with strongly maps onto both quantity and quality of sexual interactions within mate ships, likely to drop in quality as well. The prevalence of marriage and birth rates may see declining numbers. Motivation for people to work out relationship problems will be reduced. And in short, the advent of sex robot technology may foreshadow in many ways the demise of intimate relationships in the modern world. A good news about this, we don't have to worry about overpopulation, bad news, too many senior citizens,

not enough young people entering the workforce could create an unprecedented worldwide economic collapse. Things could really suck for basically my kids' generation as they age in the generation under them. You know, if they stop fucking real people, because then, negative old, there's no giant workforce beneath them to keep growing their IRAs in 401Ks, no giant workforce, keep growing the world their IRAs in 401Ks, no giant workforce.

Keep growing the world stock markets and government retirement programs. Then things collapse. But down the road, they get better, less people, more sweet robot fuck toys. Then, eventually the robots figure out to kill us. Hopefully, before that happens, we figure out how to transfer human organic consciousness into hard drives and clouds before you know Then we become robots then no one needs to fuck anyone and regular humans die But post-humanism is alive and well Post-humans are now immortal robot gods with human consciousnesses that can create new organic DNA enhanced

Carbon-based humans in future Westworld type laboratories and I've done now Because if I don't get out, you know this sex robot wormhole now, I'll ruin this entire episode. But I probably will ask Lindsey about sex robots. Maybe those would be another sex toy, you know, and won't get super popular, but I doubt it. I think they're gonna truly change life as we know dramatically. Interesting to think about how much sex could change

in the coming years if we thought porn was a big sexual norm disruptor, sex robots and virtual reality combined with enhanced artificial intelligence, they're gonna change things that we won't be able to fully comprehend until they've happened. The future's common meat, sex robots and virtual reality combined with enhanced artificial intelligence, they're going to change things that we won't be able to fully comprehend until they've happened. The future's coming to meet Saxons. Shit's going to get amazing and so fucking weird.

Speak in weird. Now, we're going to go to the it to the internet, but this one's different. It doesn't feel fair to call it it to the internet. It's more like the weirdos of the internet. I'm aware that maybe I am the real idiot for thinking this stuff is weird also. I just couldn't stop looking at videos of pony play last night. And I wanna be clear again, I don't give a shit.

That's what you're into. But if you're into it, you got to understand it's pretty bizarre. Harmless but bizarre. I don't think you're an idiot if you're into pony play. But what if you put on a pony play outfit and then you walk around out in public? Then I think you're fucking weirdo.

A harmless weirdo, but a weirdo. Your bizarre. If I see you in public dressed up in a sexy pony costume, now it feels like you're trying to force me to normalize your bizarre behavior. And I'm not ready for that yet. The definition of bizarre is odd, extravagant or eccentric and style or mode. Pony plays all that. It's normal in a sense that you just don't see very often. It's not practiced by many people.

And the comments under this pony play video, I'm going to talk about holy fuck, they were killing me and I wanted to share my joy. Hoingy fucking boingy. Uffta, uffta. All right, this has some fun. TLC had a show called Addicted My Strange Addiction. And one of the episodes, it ran from 2010 to 2015, and one of the episodes was addicted to pony play in 2014.

And the video, the comments come from the video, a video taken of that episode. And I'm fasting. Nicole in the video claims to be addicted to dressing up an action like a pony. And as the start of the video, she comes out of a barn in full pony play gear, like Max pony play gear, and addresses her aunt, who has never seen her dress up before. Never heard about this before. She tells her aunt, this is who she is,

and she wants her aunt or aunt to accept her, has her aunt, help her put a few pieces of her pony costume on her, put her bridal on her and stuff. And I gotta say, I am a pretty tolerant person, but this shit is too much for me. Her aunt gives her one of the greatest, what the fuck are you doing? Like, have you lost your goddamn mind, looks ever? And I approve of that reaction, and here's why. You wanna be into pony play?

Again, don't care. But why do you have to force that shit on your aunt? Right? That's what I don't get about this. You don't, you don't have to be that way all the time. That's a choice you're making and you're forcing your sexual, you know, bedroom choices on everybody out in public around you. I love sexy dress up.

I love garters and fishnets and cross those panties, but I'm not going to ask Lindsey to dress like that in front of my grandparents, right? I'm not going to have her dress up, you know, if not that you would, but I'm going to ask her in this situation. I would never ask her to dress up like a Catholic schoolgirl and then paddle her ass in front of a grandpa ward and grab a beddy You know and the rest of the fam at the table during Thanksgiving dinner, you know Well, what happened to go get a room? I don't push my fetishes on anyone else. I don't push my sexual choices on anyone else It's fucking private. You want to dress up like a sexual pony go for it. Enjoy it

But don't fucking push that shit on people in public and then get offended when it's not well received. You're like, why can't you accept me? I can't, you can't, I can't, I just can't accept this part of you in public. Part of me likes to jerk off. That's one of my private parts, right? That part like dressing up like a sex pony needs to stay in private. I don't get to not be insane and just beat off down at the park, you know Just stand there jerking and going accept me. This is who I am. I'm a man who likes to beat his god giving me That's how I feel about most sex stuff You want to do some anal fisting fucking go for it?

But do it in the privacy of your own home not on the sidewalk in front of the gas station, even though that would be a fucking awesome story to talk about later. Oh, and I just realized I didn't talk about anal fisting yet today. That's another type of kink. That one, whoo, that one scares me. Here's the definition of anal fisting real quick,

and then we'll get back to pony play. This is from Kinkly, this kink devoted website. Anal fisting is a sexual practice in which one partner inserts a hand into the other's anus. Despite the term, Jesus Christ. Despite the term's name, the hand is not actually in a fist position, instead the fingers are extended and overlapping. This is a more advanced technique used in anal play. Aino fisting is sometimes referred to as handballing or fistfucking.

Aino fisting requires experience, desire, communication, time, and most of all lubrication. Yeah, I bet. Desire, communication, time, and tons of loop. Oh my God. This all makes me picture a scene where the tone is almost that of a rescue mission, like where someone's injured, maybe trapped in a ravine or something in the rescue workers or telling them that they're going to save their life just to not give up. We're going to get this done, okay?

We're gonna get that hand in your ass, all right? All right, buddy, you're all right. Not gonna be easy. You gotta keep talking to me. It's gonna take some time, but we're gonna get through this. We got a lot of lube. Everybody's fingernails are trimmed. Are you ready?

We're gonna get this done. We're gonna get that fist in your ass, okay? Let's get started. You keep talking and don't you quit on me. Kinkley's definition of anal fisting continues with this is definitely not something to be tried by people who are beginners anal sex. Yeah. The risk of bleeding and rectal tears is high. That's fun. The receiving partner will definitely need to have an animal prior to getting started. And the giver should wear latex gloves to make the experience more pleasurable for their partner.

The process of getting the entire hand in should involve a very long gradual central process. The starch with the tip of the finger involves a couple of different sizes of butt plugs after quite some time, most likely hours it involves an entire hand. Don't be disappointed if the sphincter muscle refuses to cooperate the first time,

yeah, because the fucking sphincter muscles are made for hands, be shoved in them. If this is a practice you and your partner want to master, just try and try again. What the fuck? Why? This is too far. And it says, 50 was made popular by gay and bisexual men in the late 60s and 70s at clubs and sex parties.

One particular famous club was the catacombs in San Francisco, opened in 75 hosted anal 15 parties. The club eventually agreed to be a place for Sadomac's massacism and welcome lesbians by sexuals and heterosexuals. The club closed 1984 after the rise in AIDS cases shown a spotlight on the risks of anal fisting. Yeah, anal fisting in a sex club. A bunch of people just party and having drinks and then occasionally shoving entire hands into someone else's ass. What can go wrong? Why didn't that work out? Back to pony play now, which seems I got to say more harmless than ever.

And kind of vanilla after talking about anal fucking fisting. Check out how weird shit gets in the comment section. User crispy butter balls, rights. For a person who tends to pretend to be a wolf, I shouldn't be judging. Still, the tight body suit is a bit much. Oh well. And then Michael Bower replies, furry, a furry by the way, is a type of kink or fetish related to pony play.

A person with a furry fetish, enjoys dressing up as animals, being with others who dress up as animals or being with stuffed animals. It can, but doesn't have to include an attraction to stuffed animals, it's not bestiality. Mostly dressing up in sexy animal or animal-ish costumes, more roleplay, sometimes combined with BDSM.

Then someone with the username of Diamus, Serum, leaves a pro puppy play, anti-pony play comment that was removed. Puppy play is like pony play, but you're puppy and not a pony. Puppy play is like a roleplay, like your dog, your down on all fours, your barking and stuff. And like a pony person has a puppy or like a pony person has a pony person trainer,

a puppy person has a puppy person handler. There's also a lot of gear that can be involved. You can make your puppy a person need a doggy dish, you can put them in a kennel, fucking whatever. It's just as fucking weird as pony play. Another thing I don't care about in private, but I don't wanna see them public. Look, I'll make you a deal.

I promise not to jerk off on the lawn, if you promise not to take your man dog for a walk in front of my house. And if you think I'm overreacting, I don't even fucking understand you. Like, maybe you're more sexually evolved than I am, right? You might be able to go to someone's house and pet their human dog,

and watch them send their human dog out to the canal, you know, and then maybe they sit down, dressed in a full latex, gimp type suit, and the two of you just talk about politics and shit and sip Arnold Palmer's and no one judges, no one laughs, good for you. I can't fucking do it. If I walked into someone's house

and they had a dude in a latex dog suit, sleeping on like a giant doggy bed, in some corner of the living room, I would for sure say something along the lines of, well, what the fuck is that guy doing? What's fucking dog guy up to? Anyway, user cough pillbox doesn't like user diamond serum and leaving a pro puppy anti-pony play comment and post, it's just hilarious how you draw the line at pony play, but you brush off puppy plays fun and relaxing. LOL, they. They're both just fetishes, my dude.

And then Alexander replies to the initial comment about being a wolf furry riding your wolf isn't a furry. It's other kin, Jesus Christ. Look at this fucking, this is the most ridiculous argument ever. What's an other kin? I had forgotten, and I looked it up, and then I wish I didn't remember. It's more ridiculous than pony play or puppy play. Other kin are people who identify as partially or entirely being non-human. Dragon, lion, fox, whatever, you name it. Looking that up sent me into a late

night other kin wormhole and a vice article found this 19 year old named John. He's been interviewed and he says, I'm a red fox kin who was, as we call, awakened about a year ago. Uh-huh. You're a red foxkin. Okay. Then I'm a T-Rex slash dragon slash Blanca from Street Fighter II fucking hybrid. Basically, other kind of furries or puppy players

or pony players who have taken the leap from sexual fetish to actual identity. Not just a sexual thing for them anymore. Some of them feel like they are a pony, or a puppy or a fox, trapped in a human body, and you know what? Get the fuck out of here! This is madness.

This is madness now. You're not a fox or a wolf. You can pretend to be one. You're not a fucking German shepherd, trapped in a human body. Go to a counselor now. Lower mammals don't have brains, remotely equal to that in a human body. Go to a counselor now. Lower mammals don't have brains remotely equal to that of a human.

We know that. Dog brains, for example, have been studied extensively. Fox brains have been studied. They're not as developed as our brains. If you were a fucking fox, you wouldn't be able to tell anyone that you were a fox because you would be super fucking dumb. And you wouldn't be able to talk,

because foxes can't talk. You'd be shitting in the woods, not wearing clothing, killing small, woodland creatures with your fangs and claws that you wouldn't be able to talk, cause foxes can't talk. You'd be shitting in the woods, not wearing clothing, killing small, woodland creatures with your fangs and claws that you don't have, cause you're not a fucking fox. You fucking lunatic. Okay. If you want to get angry about that, whatever.

I can't, my tolerance has limits. Otherwise, it's just fucking anarchy. And I'm just like, oh, today I'm a worm. Hey, you guys, it's referred to me as a worm, cause that's how I identify now. Next day, I'm a cheetah, today I'm a worm. Hey, you guys are just refer to me as a worm because that's how I identify now. Next day, I'm a cheetah. Stop calling me a worm. I'm a cheetah now.

That's how I awakened. I'm a cheetah now. Get the fuck outta here. Taylor kills me with the following comment, writing, one day the horse girl and my school came in with a broken angle so we put her down. I love it.

Grand shock trooper also kills me. Simply posting after watching this ridiculous video. God is dead and we kill them. User Chi posts. Hey, if she trains hard enough, one day she could compete in the Kentucky Derby. Yeah, get that pony first now. They're on the track. Come on.

User dead inside post. Mom, honey, are you off your meds again? This lady puts horse bit into mouth. Huh, no. Finally, user Carolyn Austin posts. I just really stopped watching these and get a life. And I said to you, I just stopped talking about pony play. What am I fucking doing?

I lost to good two hours of sleep last night watching pony play videos. So maybe I am truly the idiot of the internet. But I had a lot of laughs, so you know what, thanks for that, Pony people. Now I gotta get out of here, so I can actually go interview Sasparilla Spunkmeister. Yeah, yeah. [♪ Music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the background, music playing in the Alright, I hope that was as interesting for you as it was for me. And again, if you're a pony player, I hope you're not galloping around all satin butter now.

You know, why can't you take this seriously? That kind of way. You know, don't let my negativity put a frown in your bride or whatever. And if you're an other kin, yeah, it's too much, too much. I can't go there. I cannot say like, that's fucking cool. Whatever, man, be a fox. Uh-uh, nope, fox. Nope, too much.

Now we've just delved into just gibberish. Why even have laws? Why even have society? Let's just all go fucking the streets and just pretend we're whatever we want to be. Okay, now let's check it now and see what my wife, Lindsay has to say about sex, get a female perspective. It feels fair, this could get interesting. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪

All right, well thank you for joining me on Time suck Lindsay. This could get interesting. What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song?

What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song?

What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? What's your favorite song? Yeah, this is a perfect episode for it. And if you're watching, yes, we are in the scared of death studios for this park. It's built for two people, not for one. But we did. If you're listening, different audio. Yeah.

And we did bring some sex toys over like some clean weaned soap, some, uh, some chicken Joe condoms, chicken, do it. Bob, Bob, Bob, we just, you know, these things won't be here for scared of death. Can I call you South of Burrula? It's a bunk, my sister now. I mean, when you were telling me that last night, I was dying. It was so funny.

So I guess the first thing, we'll get into like some real stuff here in a second. But part of me, it's like, the other kid was where I reached my limit. That's where I'm like, okay, I can't, I'm sorry. Like if someone wants to do that, okay, but if someone was my friend and it's like, hey, you gotta refer to me as a fox now,

I'm like, no, I don't. I don't think I could. I will not. I won't. So, okay, but if someone was my friend and it's like, hey, you gotta refer to me as a Fox now, I'm like, no, I don't. I don't think I could. I don't think I could. I won't. So, okay, so we were kind of like talking about this a little bit in between, right? Yeah. Where I'm so okay with whatever anybody wants to do.

If you're by, straight, trans, like all of those things, even though I don't necessarily always understand them, sure, I respect them. Yeah. I also don't go around pushing, okay, this is a great example. You know that I'm like super into my crystals. I don't actually push it on you, right? True.

We talk about it on the show. Yeah, homey don't push on me. I was saging the house this morning. I didn't even acknowledge it to you. I didn't say like, okay, now you have to participate. Right. So to me, it's that same. We have our own private things.

Right. And it's that same place in your brain where it's like, I don't, my dad is super religious. He doesn't push it on me. I don't push my non-religion on him. So to me, it's all the same where it's like, I'm not gonna fucking call you worm fox. Yeah. You're just Bob, you're just my friend.

And I don't care that you do that. Yeah. But I don't push it on you. You don't push it on me. Just be respectful. Right. And I think that's kind on you. You don't push it on me. Just be respectful. Right. And I think that's kind of where my head went with the pony play stuff initially where like if I asked somebody about,

you know, what there are sex, you know, hey, I don't even know how that would come up. Like, hey, what are you doing in sex? It just does. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it just does. But honestly, not much for me, you know, I was just thinking like, you know,

I worked with Joe longer than I've worked, you know, Joe Paisier. I've never asked him once like, hey dude, what do you guys, what do you guys into? What even your wife doing home? Well, I was actually, no, I don't. Yeah, that makes complete sense. Like my best friend, I have been best friends with her since,

she's in her mid 30s almost. We've been best friends for like 15 years. And you're not like exactly like what are you doing? No, it's like when she started dating her husband as when I started dating you, there is the conversation of like, so how was the sex? There's always that conversation.

But we're not sharing particulars. Now if something happens and you're like, you're never gonna believe what happened. Sure, sure. Okay. I know that like when us, because I know like when we first got naked and together like,

I remember you said that you told your friends, you thought it was a little weird like through my dick over my shoulder when we were were done, you're like, that was weird. Yeah, I couldn't believe it. Or over on his back. I was like, it's the last guy didn't do it like that. So I was confused. Like, why does Dan have to do that?

The other guy just let it drag on the floor. Ah! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Touche! Ha! Well, played. But yeah.

I've been with you long enough, I know where that was going. So, okay, but kind of moving away from from pony play, I guess, like the extreme. What are your thoughts? Because you're not approved. What are your thoughts about King? No, I'm not approved. What are your thoughts about King in general? Yeah, I mean, honestly, I just think, fuck yeah.

Like, you have at it. You know, do what you want to do. I was thinking about these questions, right, because we were talking about it. And I realized that like in my early years, so I lost my virginity when I was 16, almost 17. And the first exposure to actual sex was pretty boring. And I had lived with my mom, my parents are divorced. And my mom was very open in the sense that like,

she knew I was going to have sex for the first time. She said, okay, let me get you on birth control. Of course, I was young and dumb and was like, I'm not waiting, you know, very typical. Yeah. But my prior to having sex for the first time, I started masturbating at a young age. Like I was very in tune with my body,

and I always enjoyed sex. But when it came to kink, so boyfriend one, or like first sexual partner, I should say. Okay. Very basic vanilla sex, nothing, nothing that I can remember out of the ordinary. Right.

It wasn't until a couple of boyfriends or partners later that I like got my ass smacked for the first time. And I was with that person for a Signific in period of my life. So I just thought like oh, this is just how sex is. I didn't know it was kink Oh, I see I know it was weird to want that. Yeah, so I think I got really lucky because I was like oh, this is just how sex is. Oh, yeah, we have a play. Oh, we talk dirty Oh, we like ass smack. Okay. And then it is a good argument for porn, I will say, when the argument to normalize

it, because my experience was different. Well, I guess not entirely different. Very first person beyond vanilla, like a lot of, I mean, I found out a lot of bad things happened to them. So there was a lot of abuse that I didn't know about after that. And then it was just like, and so it gave me a horrible first impression of sex where it just gave me guilt and shame. And then the next person was much more liberated, no kind of hang us from before.

And then I was just like, oh, but it took a long time, you know, where I do like that argument for a poem where it's like, okay, there's other stuff out there. I'm not the only one who's interested in this. It's not weird for me to like this. Yeah. Yeah. And then as my experiences changed,

and the people I dated or slept with, because I'm very like, and I know we're gonna get into that, but just because you've had sex with somebody doesn't mean you're in a relationship with them. Sure, sure. So different partners brought different experiences to my life. Yeah. And I remember being in my early 20s and I was very casually seeing this person and it was

the first time somebody choked me and I was like, oh, what was that? And I was like, okay. But like, I, I, again, no one was stigmatizing it to me. So I never... That's good. I don't know that I've ever been with someone who was like, last fucking weird. And so I got lucky.

I think I got very lucky that I, Kink was never shamed to me. So I'm shaming different story. And I think we're gonna kind of get into that a little bit later. Yeah, and for me, like early on, one longer-term partner was very judgy and was very, very vanilla, and that did mess my head up for a while.

For sure, and something that we still talk about. Right, exactly. Where I thought, like, anything, asking for anything out of just, you know, missionary basic, very basic stuff, we just like, I'm just a filthy beast. Yeah. And how dare I?

And when you talk about talking to your friends about things, actually, that was something that early on I was, I thought I was concerned, but I just remember saying to a girlfriend, like, can you believe that his partner said this to him? And repetitively said that to him and made him feel this way? Because then I thought, oh God, am I fucking weird? Oh, interesting.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, if another female is telling my partner, who they were with, that like that wasn't okay, like, oh my God, maybe I'm wrong, oh, if another female is telling my partner, who they were with, that like that wasn't okay, like, oh my God, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it's not okay. I think that was the only time. And then my girlfriends were like,

don't be fucking crazy, that bitch is nuts. Like, you know, but it's, I think all in all, and I know we're kind of getting off our little track. Oh, that's fine, yeah. But I think all in all, it's your experience. So if the person that you were with truly felt that wanting other things other than very basic, missionary position is wrong, they are entitled to that. And then they should be with someone who also feels that way so that no one is left feeling

insecure, gross, mentally not okay, like whatever. You know, it's like, you should just be with someone who matches you. Which to me is a big argument for premarital sex. Like, and the rates have gone up, we're almost everybody has it now. But it is this thing where it's like, you know, you do, if it's going to be an important part of your life, your sexuality, it's important that you find somebody that you match with. Right. You know, because otherwise, it's not fair to either person.

Correct. It's not fair to the vanilla person if they just want, mission, that's what they truly want. Yeah. And then the other person is walking in with spurs in a cowboy hat, being like, yeah. And then they're sad.

Then nobody wants to wear the saddle. I know that you're referencing pony play. I know, I'm trying to say that. But in my mind, I'm watching this show, a million little things that you'll never watch play. I know. I'm trying to say it. But in my mind, I'm watching this show a million little things that you'll never watch. But this character, there's like a cowboy fetish. No, not even like he's dating a new person. And like, she's like, why do you have cowboy boots? He's like, I thought they were cool. And I just was picturing. Right. If you watch that show, I'm just picturing Gary right now. Like, oh my god,

this is hilarious. Okay. So let's let's move to the next kind of topic. Let's really get in there. Oh, yeah, sexual fantasies. I wanted to ask you about that because I talked a lot about that. What are people fantasized about? What is your favorite sexual fantasy? Well, I'm going to go ahead and let you answer first because it's basically the same thing.

I know, it's funny that, yeah, we talked about this this morning, I was going over these questions with you. Mine is a combo of BDSM role play and anal. You tied up, dressed up, and I get to do what I want with you. And you work, yeah. And what did I say? What did I say? What did I say? What I've been basically talking about, but I'm not comfortable.

And wasn't comfortable always, very, very hit miss. And I think it was because of the Freudian stuff I talked about earlier in this episode, where that was in my head from early psychology class days of thinking that this stuff was from trauma or like the king quiz from like a damage place. And I was so glad I read so many studies this week that just burned out out of my brain and said, wow, what a waste of time. Which makes me why I'm glad we're doing this episode too. Totally.

I know thrilled. And just for people listening, as well. Yes. But yes, also for us. Well, and I think also too, like, I mean mean and I don't want to take on like a sad No, we don't need to go down the travel, but like I was raped. So I think that then for some people yeah Partners whatever your orientation is if you know that your partner has been sexually assaulted in any capacity Whatever that is, you know a family member a stranger whatever something has happened to them

If they're asking you to kind of recreate because because without like, so we're going to talk about fantasies, and when 50 Shades of Grey came out, I think that it opened the conversation up. I'm not, I'm not going to be an advocate for like, what was the best book ever. I read it and was like, oh, okay. But to me, I was like, yeah, I always wanted those things. Like, yes, please, tie me up, make me beg for it. Like the suspension, it's almost like a drawn out foreplay. Yeah. Like just like you want it to like go and go and go.

Although I will say like, I remember one night not together all that long ago, we were like, yeah, we're gonna do this whole long thing. And then five minutes in, we were both like, oh, that was good. Like, let's just have sex found be and finish. Not that it left. No, yeah, but yeah, yeah, yeah, we're gonna do this whole long thing. And then five minutes and we're both like, all right, that was good. Like, let's just have sex, that one be in finish. Not that it lasts. No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, because I'm not a porn star and you're not a porn star. And I'm like, I mean, I can only handle so much stimulation. Yeah, and? You know, so it's like, Jesus. But, but so anyways to go back to what I was saying, any, I like the timey up, I like all of that.

I like, it feels very, actually typical. It feels very like, okay, basic white bitch. I just want you to be the man and take control. Okay, yeah. I love that. But you also know what has happened to me. I know. I can only imagine how that must play out in your head to a certain level of like, is

she somehow processing like a trauma? Is this okay? Is this safe? Should we be in therapy? Like, is she somehow processing like a trauma? Is this okay? Is this safe? Should we be in therapy? Like, is she all right? Like, I can see that. Yeah, early on, those were thoughts, you know, it's like, and I don't want to add to it and things.

But now, I get, I am so glad I did this because now I think I'm over that. Great. We're now, I'm just like, oh, okay. It's gonna be a fun weekend. No kids in the house. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I'm so glad I got, you know, got to get my head around kind of this information

a lot more. And also one thing I learned this week, to steer in a different way, just reminds me of the conversation we had this morning. And we talked about like the setup it takes to do these kind of fantasies. Oh my God, yeah. Or sometimes you don't have the time.

And then that would get in my head because we're so busy, I've been so busy with work. I mean, specifically the podcast did increase my workload exponentially. And so it definitely affected our sex life tremendously. Our entire life. Our entire life. And then with the kids and everything else, and then I would get really worried like, oh my god, when I haven't sexed as much we used to, and it's all going to go away forever,

I did like in this, you know, studies I was reading that just talked about happiness overall. Yeah. And there was no correlation between unhappiness and a relationship overall with a lack of sex. We're basically like, yeah, we'll have periods. We won't have as much while periods when we have it more. Yeah. But it's not the end all, be all of relationship, which is also important to point out

on a sex-related episode. Yeah. This important to sex is, it doesn't need to be your everything. Well, and we've had, you know, we're not a couple that fights a lot, but we have had some very intense conversations around exactly that. Yes, yes. About like you being worried, like, why are we always going to be this tired? And if I'm working this hard and just at the end of it, our relationships just going

to crumble, which is a valid concern, but it was generally around the sex aspect. True. And as a woman, and I think it's important to say, because I think that we have a lot of male listeners, not that we don't have female, but I think that it's important to point out something that comes up with me and my girlfriends continually is. I'm tired. Whether I've got a job outside of the home or not. I think that women continually feel, okay, I not only have my job, but then I have the job of running the household.

And I relate to that very much. So, where it's like, we joke, I'm the home boss, but I am, but I also have run a fucking company. And we have a particular situation with kids where it's like, I'm fucking driving back and forth. So, it's often the last thing that's on my mind. It doesn't mean that when I look at you, I'm not attracted. It doesn't mean that I don't occasionally masturbate.

It doesn't mean that I'm not thinking about sex. It means that like when you're telling me you want to have sex or you're like, you know, I tease you. I'm like, okay, yep, you're making the look at me. I see you coming. I'm right. All I'm thinking about is like, but I have to get to the grocery store.

I have to meal crap there. There's a art project is like, but I have to get to the grocery store. I have to kneel crap there. There's an art project that has to be done. There's clothes in the laundry. We've been doing saddle training for four hours. I took this burrs to you again. And my back is all. Your back is hurt. Rantantantantantantantant it's really important to point out that I don't, if you're in a relationship, a long-term relationship, there are going to be phases of I'm too tired.

Like, when you're early on and you're dating and you're fucking all the time, you have to be realistic that that is not how it's going to be. And what I find is that men, sorry, generally think that is how it's going to be. They're I find is that men, sorry, generally think that is how it's going to be like, fuck yeah, I found this girl who loves to suck my dick. She loves to have sex all the time. She's always in lingerie. And I'm referencing our beginnings. You know, it's like we were doing all the things all the time. We were living in a bubble. Yes, yes. And it's not, yeah, exactly. You know, so it's just, and it's not to say that we don't do those things. It's just harder to find the time in

moments. It depends on your life too. It depends on the choices you make. We chose to start a business, which is going to take more time than a day job, that you can leave at work. There's kids that run, so it's like that's something that obviously we knew about because they were there from the beginning with us. There's dogs.

Dogs are such dogs blockers. The biggest dog blockers ever. I know, depending dogs blockers. The biggest dog blockers ever. I know, at Penny and Gigi are the biggest cock blockers. Literally ever. We have to, yeah, we have to kick them out of the room. That was the thing we learned. Crank up the music. Crank up the music.

Give them a special bow. To round out their fucking constant cries and their scratch on the door and then deal with the weirdness after sex. When we open the door, covering up private parts. And the dogs stare at me like, I've just fucking beaten you for to admit they're worried. They're like, it's hilarious. Yeah. Okay. So porn, if you want

to move on to porn because- porn. Talked about that a lot this episode. What are your thoughts on porn? Well, I personally like porn. And why do you like porn? Well, I have used it as like a preemptive sort of like like how long can we watch it without being at it? Yeah. Yeah. Like it's a good, I think it shows different ways to do things. Okay.

You know, it can just, listen, we all fall into like, this is what we do. I do this and then you do that and then the, the, the, the, the, the, the, and listening to you talk about this, it's like, yeah, porn is great because it shows you change. It shows you something different. Right, right. Right, right. Your brain responds to that. Yeah, and I didn't even know

that that was what I was doing. Yeah, me either. So that was cool to learn. Yeah. I think it can be empowering, you know, where it's like, oh, I have that fantasy. Oh, look at all these other people. Also have this fantasy.

Right. You can see like downloads or views. Okay. Okay. It normalizes it a little bit. I think you can feel less uncomfortable. I just, sometimes it's hilarious. What do you watch? It depends. You like the rougher stuff. Yeah, I do. Yeah.

I might get around to understanding a little bit of that better now because see, kind of what we talked about earlier with the Freudian background, I've never liked that stuff. Because I like pictures. Yeah, I've like still pictures. And I've never liked, but also with the videos, if I feel like the guy comes across and being a jerk to me, I'm just like, why are you being a dick?

I mean, I would say like the most. But I didn't understand like a fantasy. I was looking at like, how man's this poor thing? No, but I mean, she agreed to it. And I think that that's why, yeah. With all of this, I looking at like, how man's this poor thing? No, but I mean, she agreed to it. And I think that that's why with all of this, I just feel like if you have consenting adults, whether it's two or ten. Right, right. Then fine.

No, I'm not going to watch. I like a little bit of a storyline, but I never like to listen to it. Their voices are always weird. They're not the greatest actors a lot of times, too. No. They're not picked because of all the acting school they went through. That's right. That's right. This is no Brad Pitt, Angelina, Joly, kind of thing. Not a lot of emotional nuance. No, no.

So it's like, you know, and then I have like my own weird things. I'm like, I don't want to watch like a supposed incest thing. Which is super popular now. Like off the charts. I'm not judging. And also like, I'm realistic that hello, this is porn. They're probably not actually. Oh God, no.

Stepmom and step, you know what I mean? So it's like, I realize that it hello, this is porn. They're probably not actually stepmom. You know what I mean? So I was like, I realize that it's just something they're acting out. But that being a stepmom, that's like, it's too close to home. That's creepy. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, like, whatever. But yeah, like a lot of like tying up.

I would look pretty much the BDSM. And I mean, we talked about this a little bit last night. I don't have a problem watching like a gang bang because in my mind, they're consenting adults. I don't wanna watch a biopic of someone who was gang raped. That doesn't fucking turn you on. Those are two very different things. And I think it's important to say that

because you can take, I think that someone can watch a gangbang porno and then kind of like what you're talking about, like you go to that 40-in-place, if you're like, huh, huh, this is not okay. Why are you doing that to her? It's very different to watch a porno that people can send to do than to see it as part of a real life thing.

Okay, yeah, no, okay, I love that. I love that perspective. Another thing that comes up a lot in porn, the dude's talking about a lot for sure, anal. Why is there a fixation with anal sex? Well, listening to you research this, do you think that it is because it's something new? Oh, yeah, I guess it's probably like cyclical

where it's like it wasn't nearly as popular at least to studies and stuff back in the 40s, 50s things. Ah, where people were probably virgins, so she was new anyways. Oh, right. Right. So there's more novelty. Yeah. Prop, that actually does make sense.

We're like, we're more desensitized because we see so much sex on and then now understand I didn't think about that until you said that. Yeah, where far brains are just not kicking out the dopamine towards regular sexual stimuli. You know, then we're going to probably want to take things further. That's the next step that makes sense that way. Because it is a different thing where it's like, like our parents did not grow up when they were watching TV, watching everybody allude to fucking all the time.

Like I do think about, and I've referenced it a few times, but leave it to be, or Father knows best, it was just a type of sitcom. I mean, they slept in separate beds. It showed them, like the I love Lucy, all that type of sitcom. I mean, they slept in separate beds. It showed them getting this, like the I love Lucy, all that kind of stuff. There was no reference to real sexuality.

So that's all you're seeing. Then any kind of sex is gonna be like, whoa! This is off the charts. Right, and what you were sleeping with were generally virgins. I think that there is a virginal element to anal. Oh, okay, okay. So I feel like more, there was less premarital sex in previous generations. Yes. That's true. Fact. Fact. Yes. Fact.

Okay. Less partners on average. Right. So if you're not having premarital sex and you and your partner is also not, you are conquering that for the first time. No one else has. Okay. Now anal sex, maybe your partner wasn't into it before, but now you've been in a long-term relationship. You're willing to explore that because you're in a place of safety and trust and all those open communication, all those things. Now you're willing to explore this new boundary. Right.

So, okay, so let's just take it back. So you and I had previous partner, obviously, like not only Gary didn't much, but like, we were in our 30s, whatever. Okay. We were not like religiously devout. Like we were having sex. Okay. With other people prior. Yeah. Now let's just say I had come to the table and said, I'd never had anal. Would that make anal that much more interesting to you? Because you're like, oh, okay, no one else did this. I'm sure. I'm going to. That is a guy thing.

Yep. I mean, there is some stuff. I didn't include it in the episode because there was just so many rabbit holes I could go down. I started to go down one. I could tell I didn't have time to finish it. Yeah. But there was this like, you know, like sexual beginnings for kind of humans.

And there was this thing back in the days of like the Babylonian and the early Mesopotamian societies where basically how did people increase their power, relationships, relationships meant everything to get land and to get power, and relationships were built through marriage. And basically that's when kind of women became like property, where it was to solidify bonds for the men. And it was this biological thing where,

you know, a man could seed many women and increase his empire, because that's still his blood. His blood lineage increases, family have that family blood connection, a man could seed many women and increase his empire, that's still his blood. His blood lineage increases family, have that family blood connection, they can then all go get more connections and get more powerful,

and a woman biologically can't do the same thing. Correct. So it became more important for women to be virginals to the man with her new, this is my offspring, not Larry's, and is further in my connection. And so if you take that further and that's ingrained in our heads,

there could be something where maybe that's why guys have that version of attraction. It goes back to all those days, you know, years, so many years ago. Yeah. When it ties into something instinctual, we're trying to further our lineage. Yeah. We're trying to, it's our domain and crease our, you know, empire.

Yeah. Okay. So I mean, and you know, I think with everything, if it's consenting adults, have at it, you know? But like overall, I just think like, you know, like just go slow, be careful. And with anal sex in particular, just fucking be patient you guys.

I was talking to a girlfriend this morning and she said the funniest thing to me. Yeah. I was, oh my God, I was dying. I don't want it out her, but by saying her name, but she was like, oh yeah, anal sex. My partner and I have done that a few times. And the whole next day, it's just fucking shit and jello. Oh my God.

And I was like, oh my God, that's what you guys don't realize too. Like I didn't even think about that. It's not just all the lube and the this and the that. And like, you know, there are like loobs that you can literally like syringes use a syringe to insert for numbing and stretching and then you come in our ass and then we go to the bathroom, which we always do after we have sex. So we don't get a UTI like you guys don't have any of these fucking concerns.

Yeah. Or it's like one day after sex, I wake up and I'm like, fuck, my overhurt, it's goddamn it. Get the cranberry juice. Like I have to like work so hard to keep my vagina happy after sex. Now you're going to include my ass. And so now it's like, I mean, the diarrhea the next day, I hate to be so graphic and gross, but here we go. It's like, I am letting go of urine and your com that is like, lodge shots in there and diarrhea. And your butt is sore.

Think about like when you've had the stomach flu and it like starts to hurt to go to the bathroom, that is what it's like for 24 hours after anal sex. Even though it's enjoyable. Right, like the moment is like so good. And you love it. But then the next day you're like, oh, damn it.

Okay. Kind of feel like you might want to wear a diaper. Okay, that'll make, I'm gonna, I have to admit, the end of today's episode, I found a great article for advice about it. It goes into pretty funny things that I think you're like. Okay. There's one thing that talks about going slow

that I'm, now I'm killing my joke for later. But it's just like, it said, don't coolate your way in. And not everyone will get that reference, but it's the old commercial where the, where the Kool-Aid man barched the wall. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I smashed it to the wall. Yeah. Don't smash in. Don't smash in Yeah, I smashed us to the wall. Yeah.

Don't smash in. Don't smash in. Don't smash in. It can be done just to be patient. And you have to do it kind of going back to what you said before, but I'm like set up for fantasies. Yeah. AnoSex, you have to be committed to like, okay, once a week, we're really going to work

on that butthole. By right, right, yeah. Because it's a muscle. It goes back. Things, yes, yes. Right? But I mean, get a butt plug it's a muscle. It goes back. Things, yes, yes. But I mean, get a butt plug, get a few, get different sizes. Now we have in a recording schedule time today before everybody has to go home. We have time for one or two more questions.

I want to make sure that you address. I thought you were going to say like a demo. No, I want to get nervous. No, because I know you prepped some stuff. So how about you steer this out of here with the things you want to talk about at the end? Well, just the, you know, some, some things that I think are really important. Yeah.

It was, it was your question to me about like what sexual advice would you give to young women? And I, I think that that's a really great place to end this segment. Okay. Because I think it's really important, whether it's like young women, old women, whatever, wherever you're at in your sexual journey. People always like reference our relationship and will ask me, you know, like, oh, old women, whatever, wherever you're at in your sexual journey, people always like reference our relationship and will ask me, you know, like, oh, how come your relationship

so good? And I think the thing to know is communication. And you and I talk about this a lot. I mean, Dan and I talk about everything, literally everything. And I don't know if that's a result of you having a marriage that fell apart if you just learned, because I don't know that everyone, but we talk about everything, and when it comes to sex,

you have to talk about everything, every step of the way. Every, like, you should be in such a comfortable place with your partner that talking about sex is like talking about balancing the checkbook. Nothing's off limits. That's a great analogy, yeah. Right, because if you financially cheated on me,

I would actually be more angry than if you physically cheated on me. We've talked about that a lot. I think a correlation there where I wouldn't go out and buy a new car without talking to you about it first. It's a huge commitment. You can't just shove your dick in my ass without talking to me about it.

It's a huge commitment. Ha, right, okay. Like it's, and so wherever you're at, and you're like, yeah, no, okay, yeah. I'm crying a new car. No, I was playing up on the huge, but I know I never saw that. Oh, shoot, I thought you were getting like a new car.

I know. But I just think it's really important to know that, that like, and also not to be ashamed. If you're with somebody who you share with them, you're fantasy and they laugh at you or they mock you, that's not a healthy relationship. You gotta go. You gotta go.

They can have a weird reaction. There's nuance within that. If I told you that I wanted to do pony play and you just kind of laughed at me, with- That's literally where my head went with your verse. I was picturing me with music like, oh, by myself.

And then you just walk away and like a complete pony outfit. I'm just like so sad. But then I would hope that the next day you'd be able to come back to me and say, I'm sorry, I didn't handle that appropriately. Yes. Are you being serious? Yes, true, true, true.

And I would. And you have to have humor about all of it because if you're going to start experimenting with fantasies and butt play and all these different things and you know, if you want to come all over my fucking face, like there's going to, I mean, it's happened. Yeah. I just keep it for the rest of the episode. Yeah.

There's discomfort. There's, yeah. There's humor in all of it. And you just have to humble yourself. And then also I just kind of want to say, and if you want to sleep around, fucking have at it, just be smart. Not a sort of relationship.

What are you talking about? But when I was single of all my girlfriends, I was like, fuck it. You were at the bar and you want to sleep with him? Do it. Where are you going with him? Right, basically. Is your fine-to-friend track or on? Do you really know this guy? Maybe you should come to our apartment and have sex? Like him, do it. Where are you going with him? Right. Is your find a friend track or on?

Do you really know this guy? Maybe you should come to our apartment and have sex like just think about what you're doing, especially as a woman, you know, because not that men can't be raped. That's absolutely a thing that happens. So male or female, just be aware of what you're doing. Know where you are. Make sure somebody else knows where you're going. What you're up to.

Just just be smart. But don't be ashamed of it. Be smart, don't be ashamed and talk. That's like the big takeaway. Just communicate. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate. And when you and your partner start fighting a lot, that was like one thing that I like me a little note. You and I don't have a lot of time for sex right now because our life is the path that we have chosen to execute. Sure, sure. But I know that we both know, like anytime we're starting to really snap at each other, 99.9% of the time, one of us will say to the other one,

when's the last time we had sex? True, true. That connection is very important. It's very important. It's not about the quantity of sex. It's about oftentimes just skin-to-skin getting back to your basics. Yep, yep.

Good stuff. I love sex. I. Yep, yep. Good stuff. I love sex. I love you, Staspirilla. I love you, sexy pony man. I can't remember my pony name right now. I don't know what it is. Oh, okay, thank you guys for listening to this interview with Lindsay, great of the suck.

And scared of death, scared of death, go host. And all the things. All the things. All the things. Oh, that was so fun. That was so fun. Glad I got you. all the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things.

All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things.

All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things.

All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. All the things. And we're pretty open, you know, talk about a lot of things, but I learned some new things about her, learned some good, healthy sexual perspective stuff. Hope you guys did as well. That was very, very cool. And now for sex tips, we'll end up with some sex tips before going to the top five takeaways. I promised them earlier, and we were just talking about the anal stuff. I feel like a teenage girl, because the best article I found about anal sex came from Cosmopolitan, Cosmopolitan magazine. anal sex tips, you know, and I distinct with a lot more people bored and at home, guessing a lot more people are gonna be trying stuff for the first time and this is one of the things

that people tend to try fairly popular. So here we go, how to have anal sex. A step one, and this is the joke I already ruined. Treat anal like a door, literally. You gotta ring the doorbell before entering. And this is a Sharna Walsh, founder creator of Coral the Sexual Wellness app, who says this, she says massage and warm up the doorbell before entering. And this is a sharn of wall, a founder creator of Coral, the sexual wellness app, who says this, she says massage and warm up the anus

before entering anything inside. And she's the one who said, be a good guest. So actually, it wasn't my joke, everyone, it was hers. Be a good guest. Don't just coolate man yourself to the door. That is so funny to me. You don't want to be, oh, yeah, just trying to barge in. That's going to equal out, fuck no.

Step two, prepare a resting station, and that's a little spot for like the toys or lubes you're gonna need, because it is a process. So you're gonna have like a towel out or something with all your stuff, your lubes, your butt plugs, all those things that are out there, many kind of vibrators and stuff. Step three, never thought of this.

Try a little sacral massage. Take 15, 20 minutes, give the receiving partner a sacral massage, and that's the lower back just above the butt crack. The muscles and nerve endings in the sacrum extend to the whole pelvic girdle and can help release tension. Didn't know that. Step four, stimulate around the anal opening first. A lot of nerve endings in that area.

Make friends with the whole area before you try and go inside. Step five, don't neglect the clit. Having a literal stimulation is super important in an apli because it helps a vulva owner to relax and then become fully aroused. Relax is the whole arogenous zone. Maybe try a vibrator, some other favorite sex toy. Step six, try a heated lubricant.

Didn't know about this. The heat created actually helps bring blood flow to the area, helps increase stimulation to the pleasure receptors in the rectum slash anus, explains Dr. Nicket-San Paul of Brookdale Hospital Medical Center. Step seven is to relax, put on some music, put you in call mode, breathe, more tense you are, the heart is going to be to enjoy, the muscles will get firmer. Step eight, use a water-based lubricant. Sexologist Diel McDevitt says to secure a quality water-based lube ahead of time.

This will make rubbing and massaging that much better. Even if your foreplay doesn't involve penetration for now, lues make everything better and can increase sensitivity. Step nine is toys. McDevitt recommends trying to vibrating anal toy with a broad head, simply place the head against the anal opening, but don't insert or glide the toy in a circle around the opening. External anal vibrations add completely new sensations, alternate between the vibe and your finger to really tease. Also start small with anything that does get inserted.

Very small butt plug. Maybe a finger, make sure that fingernail is not jagged. Don't overlook that. Get the fingernail file out beforehand. Step 10, more loob. Use as much as you need. Never skimp on the loop. Might feel odd, but it shouldn't hurt. Oftentimes, it'll hurt me if there's not enough loob. Step 11, just the tip. Start shallow. Don't get impatient. Everything that goes in should be just the tip. The nerve endings you're trying to stimulate or in the anus, hence the moniker rimming, not all the way up there, which is generally the painful part.

And also the part that makes you feel like you need to take a huge dump. I step 12, slow the fuck down. Don't ram away like you see in porn. What they don't show, and I've known people have worked in porn, is all the previous steps we just talked about. They don't show all the preparation. They don't show they're getting ready. They just show jackhammering away. And that's not how it works, you know, right off the bat, unless you want to go to the ER for rectal tear or worse. Step 13 doesn't have to be done doggy style. Find a position that works for you. There are a variety of positions like line in your back with your hips elevated, sitting on the, you know, facing the guy reverse cow, there's also a reverse

cow girl. Step 14, last step, communications key. And that's really with all of this, communications key, just like with fisting, you know, kind of see still freaks me out. And important to note, not as dirty as you might think if poop is getting into your head, clinical sexologist, cat van Kirk points out to the anus and the lower part of the rectum have very little fecal matter,

fecal material in them. Not as dirty as most people think. Also, if you're doing this stuff, make sure your partner doesn't put anything in your vagina that was just in your butt before washing it off, because that could lead to an infection. And then that's it.

After that, it's just good luck. Not everyone likes it. If your partner tries it and hates it, tries it and hates it again, you might have to just let it go. Maybe, maybe give a pony blade, I try. Okay, two more sex tips. Let's do best female orgasm tips,

and then also best blow job. Quick word on female orgasm. Feels fair after the butt stuff, which is, sounds like mostly for dudes, not always. Here's some good advice I found that I agree with. Every vagina person, obviously a bit different, but most of the time it's good to make friends with the clit. This is some advice from sex therapist, Mary Brande and PhD. Start with the teas.

Touch her everywhere but herclataurus, the sides above it below it, her labia, around her vaginal opening. Play with her pussy over her panties, apply pressure to the sides of the catorce, alternately alternately, alternately positioning the base of the V formed by your fingers above and below herclatoris. As you progress to more intense stimulation, target the upper left quadrant of herclatoris, highly sensitive area for most women, Brandon says. Know that there is a hood over herclatoris, she adds, you could pull that up, see how

she responds for two more direct contact. Once you take her over the top, don't evacuate the area. She may be up for round two or sometimes three. Brandon says it's typically easier for women to have multiple orgasms if the contact doesn't discontinue completely, but she also says she's going to need a little break from the intensity. She suggests leaving your fingers where they are, but only applying the slightest pressure and no back and forth. Then slowly start moving again. See how she responds to that. If she jerks like it's too much, stay quiet a little longer.

If she's responsive, you can get started again. And that was a tip, actually from men's health, for the best orgasm ever. But I thought was pretty good. Last sex tip, how to give an amazing blow job. This is pretty simple. You put it in your mouth and suck it. All right, let's get to today's top five. No. JK, there's a bit more to it than that. Vanessa Marin certified sex therapist in LA says that men love blow jobs because the act feels like sex, but it's different because they get to relax and receive and just enjoy

what's happening in front of them. She adds that the visual element of watching their penis slip in and out of a mouth gets a lot of guys going. I concur. Vanessa's first piece of advice is show enthusiasm and I couldn't like that more. Right? Holy shit, that is so true. Best blow jobs are the ones where you feel like the person given it really wants the

suck it. Right? When they act like that, Dick just fucking save them from dying in a fire and they just want to express the most possible gratitude. Vanessa show says to show eye contact tell him how turned on you are you know be verbal ask him what he wants communication again coming back to that so much of good sex is about communication and then she gives some technique tips use those hands. She says if your jaw starts to feel sore, tired a few minutes into the job, you're likely suctioning too hard with your mouth, shift some of the work to your hands, counting on

them for pressure. And then she says, here's your basic stroke once you've warmed up a bit. Wrap your dominant hand around a shaft, add your mouth, connect your hand to your lips as in press your index finger and thumb, when you're making the o-sign against your lips, keep them sealed there, move your hand plus lips up and down on this penis. Yes, and yes, and more, yes. And then she says, try this wrist twist

with your mouth on this penis, rotate your firm wrist in a clockwise circle as you move your hand up and down, big fan. She also says, don't be afraid to add spit, right? Spit on that dick. You know, rude to spit on afraid to add spit, right? Spit on that dick. You know, rude to spit on someone's face, fucking hot to spit on the dick. And Vanessa also says when you're blowing him, your tongue provides warmth, texture and wetness that he can't get elsewhere, maximize its sensation. Keep your tongue soft in your mouth when you're

moving up and down the majority of the blow job, then use the tip of your tongue to trace the head and frenulum. Under side where the penis head meets the shaft, those two areas, especially the frenulum packed with nerve endings. So he'll go crazy. Yes, again. And then she says, if you can handle it, try the deep throat. Obviously, sometimes gag reflexes prevent that. And then also some guys like a little butt play during the blow job.

She says, if he's in, do it, move a finger or two towards his perneum or taint, the area between his scrotum and his anus go from there. The prostate lies right under the perineum and is known to be the male g-spot. The holy trifecta of oral sex is mouth on head, hand on shaft, hand on balls, says Marin, the holy quad would bring the butt into it. So there you go, right?

Sex, stat, sex, toxic, tips. It was the sex suck communication, communication, communication. That's a lot of stuff. So if you want you to work on most, when it comes to sex, toxic, tips, it was a sex suck. Communication, communication, communication. That's what Lucio Fiena wants you to work on most when it comes to sex. Older I get the more important, I realize communication is so important, so many ways, still realizing that. That includes sex, your partner can't read your mind, you know, how are you gonna do what you want

if you don't tell them? Also hygiene, let me say that, clean that fucking wing. Clean that lady wing. Get all that shit, mama, Ridgeway, sparkling clean. Clean that butt, clean that mouth. Just be clean. Good hygiene is so attractive. Bad hygiene is so unattractive.

I turn it to Kingshame, but I will hygiene shame all day long. And I realize I have Kingshame about pointy play. But hygiene shame, oh my, it's so unnecessary. Don't recive BO. Don't let your teeth wear sweater. Don't let your belly button smell like someone took a shit wear sweater. Don't let your belly button smell like someone to a shit in it. Don't let your butt hole smell like the place

that the shit came from. Scrub that swamp ass. We're all washing our hands a lot more now. Don't forget to wash that. They can wash those pussy's. And that's it. Time now for top five takeaways. Time, suck.

Top five takeaways. Number one, if you're gonna try anal statistically, so comment now, go slow. Talk it out. Use so much, Luke. Number two, kink. It's okay. Right? Wanting to be spanked doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you.

Neither does as much as I have joked. Wanted to get a little butt plug tail and have your partner yell, get it up, Shasfer Ellis, Spoke Master. Captain Whisker horns ready to ride. Kaka, ha! Number three, porn, good or bad, sounds like both. Watch too much and you may burn out the part of your brain that gets turned on.

You may have your expectations so altered that real life sex seems boring and uninteresting. Uninteresting. However, you might also learn some new tricks. You might also get turned on in ways that carry over to more fun in the bedroom and it might make you realize, okay, there's nothing wrong with me. Pl plenty of people like this might destigmatize stuff Number four the coolage effect how cool is that to learn about our brains love new and with sex new doesn't have to be a new

Part, it can be a new type of sex and number five new info squirting you thought I forgot didn't you? How pissed would some of you spacers would be if I didn't even talk about squatting after all this, you voted it in, new info, the female ejaculation. What is female ejaculation? Fuck, it's trapped in. You don't need a penis to ejaculate. You just need a urethra. Your urethra is a tube that allows urine to pass out of the body.

A ejaculation occurs when fluid, not necessarily urine, is expelled from your urethral opening during sexual arousal or orgasm. This is different from the cervical fluid that lubricates a vagina when the vagina owner is turned on or, quote, wet. Is female ejaculation common? Yeah, somewhat. And one sex study of 233 sexually active women, about 126 people, 54 percent, said that they experienced ejaculation at least once. About 33 people, 14%, said they experienced ejaculation with all or most orgasms. In a recent cross-sectional study of female ejaculation that followed women age 18 to 39 from 2012 to 2016, researchers concluded that a whopping 69.23% of participants experienced ejaculation during orgasm. But is female ejaculation the same thing as squirting?

No, sorry, but it is not. Research suggests female ejaculation and squirting, the kinds seen in porn are two different things. Squirting that gushing fluid, often seen in adult films, appears to be more common than ejaculation, and the fluid that's released during squirting is essentially watered down urine. Sometimes with a bit of ejaculate in it, it comes from the bladder, it exits via the urethra

same as when you pee. Female ejaculate is much thicker, it's a whitish fluid that resembles deluded milk. Female ejaculate contains some of the same components as semen. A ejaculate comes from skeens glands or the female prostate. They're located on the front wall of the vagina surrounding the urethra. They can each contain openings that can release a ejaculate,

although the glands were described in detail by Alexander's skin in the late 1800s. Their similarity to the prostate is a fairly recent discovery in researches ongoing, and this ejaculate is not urine. A ejaculate is mostly prostate enzymes with a hint of urea squirting deluded urine with a bit of ejaculate in it. So squirting is basically just sexy pissing. That's what it was called in several articles, sexy pain. That's what the scientific data shows so far.

So when you get squirted on, when it's just gushing out of a gen, that wasn't come. You weren't came on, you were pissed on, which is a kink as we learned, some people enjoy. Last thoughts on female ejaculation, women can ejaculate quite a bit of fluid. According to a 2013 study of 320 participants, the amount of ejaculate released can range

from approximately 0.3 milliliters to more than 150 milliliters. That's more than half a cup. Unlike with men, female ejaculation is not always the product of orgasm. Some research indicates that while female ejaculation is usually the product of orgasm, it can also occur with G-spot stimulation outside of orgasm. It doesn't like shoot out, but it can just flow out. What's the G-spot known as the Graffinberg spot, the G-spot was introduced by Dr. Beverly Whipple. After she discovered that using a come here motion, this little kind of YouTube I'm demonstrating, like kind

of pulling your fingers back, like you're like, you're telling somebody to come here. Sorry, so she discovered using this come here motion along the inside of the vagina produces a physical response in women. She believed that this region could be the key to women achieving orgasm during sex instead of being its own separate spot in your vagina. The G spot is part of your clitoral network. That means that when you're stimulating the G spot, you're stimulating part of the catoris, which is much larger than most believe, turns out the pea-sized nub where the interlebia meat is actually only the tip of the catoris. And it divides into two roots that can be about four inches long each.

Plus this region can vary from woman to woman, which explains why it can be difficult to locate the G spot. However, once it's simulated, the G spot can cause female ejaculation and help women reach vaginal orgasm, which is far less common than literal orgasm with women. Man, vagina is so much more complicated than wings. Punching that clown in, you know, and then, you know, he tries to squirt you. Pretty simple. But, gin is research is actually still ongoing to figure out exactly how they work.

There. Squirting, we did it, you guys. We did it. Time suck. Tough, you guys. We did it. Time suck, tough, right takeaway. Sex suck sucked. That was a fun change of pace. For me at least, I hope you enjoyed it as well.

I've been liking the variety lately. A big thanks to the Queen, my wife Lindsey Cummins loved her, I love that we can talk about stuff like this. Thanks to the time suck team, high priestess, Harmony Velocamp, Reverend Dr. Joe Paisley, the Biddelixer design crew, Logan and K. Dispicy Club, running badmagicmerch.com, Scripkeeper's Act Flannery.

Thanks to the all CNIs, the cult help and Liz Hernandez run the cult of the Curious Facebook group. Thank you, Liz. Never been a better time to jump in. Get some socialization virtually. Yeah, link in the episode description, link in the episode description for Discord as well. Next week, we go traditional again, ready to return to some true crime. Serial killer Robert Bordella, the Kansas City butcher, the collector, killed at least six

people between 84 and 88 in Kansas City and he was a freak. 1982, Bordella began renting his own booth at the Westport flea market in Kansas City. The store was named Bob's Bizarre Bizarre and a primarily sold and traded primitive art jewelry and antiques. Worked into flea market. Bordella became acquainted with a fellow merchant named Paul Howell, who operated a booth adjacent to his. Soon, Bordella became acquainted with Paul Howell's younger son, 19 year old Jerry. Jerry would be his first victim. Man, his first victim, man, this guy, this guy. He told Jerry he was taking him to attend a dance contest the day that Jerry disappeared. According to Bredella, he got him to drink some booze, had some volume and a powerful

tranquilizer in it, then he injected hell with another heavy tranquilizer, then tied him to his bed. This is the type of kink we should all shame, no consent with Bob's kink. He tied him up there, kept him for over 24 hours, roughly 28 hours, repeatedly drug tortured, raped and violated him with foreign objects, and then things got much worse from there. And then Bob got more depraved as his murders continued and you will have to listen next week to learn more about this ruthless, weird son of a bitch. And now it is time.

We check in with this week's Time Sucker Updates. First update is a timely warning passed our way by Super Sucker Matthew Baker. Matthew Wright you guys, oh no, you guys. Dan mentioned something about not hearing anything about butt stuff being disallowed during our current crisis. Here this, part of the New York City press release on how to stay safe, it includes definitions of sex acts to avoid, including rimming, which also goes so far as to define. Science is iffy on a fecal oral transmission route, but there's enough evidence to support the probability. Possibly my favorite part of this information, as one

Twitter user was quick to point out, when kids are having to do projects on COVID decades from now, they will inevitably come across the government sanctioned information, warning us that licking each other's buttholes might not be a good idea right now. Thanks for all that you do. Keep in the facts straight. I'm working urgent care right now and having the sucks to listen to on the drive to and from work as a blessing blessing God bless and be safe Matt Baker. Oh man. Thank you Matt Yeah, good time to get freaky in the bedroom, but don't get too freaky. Don't get sick at the worst possible time We don't want to add to our medical personnel's workload right now

You don't want to you know go to the doctor for bacterial infection and come home with COVID-19 and thanks for what you doing Thanks for doing what you do and continuing to do that right now, Matt, with the urgent care. Huge thanks to doctors, nurses, truck drivers, police officers, everyone else who has to keep working right now. People who constantly risk getting sick to keep society from falling apart. Hail Nimrod, so grateful for all that you do. And now from Belarus, the country taking this pandemic the least seriously by far. And if you're curious what I mean by that,

oh, just Google COVID-19 and Beto Roos and you are fucking welcome. Wow. Time-soaker amazing artist, Max Lazaro, has given you a cool new video game to beta tests. Max writes, hey Dan, it would be really awesome if you could help me spread the word. We just open to beta testing and collecting feedback

to improve the game and get an audience. Working title is football legends. Shortly, it's a mix of brawl and soccer with characters from British literature. Actually, you've already helped me with research about King Arthur and Dracula, as they are playable characters in the game as well as a bunch of others like Sherlock Holmes or Alice in Wonderland. Maybe one day we can become big enough to have to be honored to bring a time-sug team onto the field. Oh my god, yes. And then Max included a short gameplay video and then a link to a discord group where you can get our current game build art information, talk with players in the development team.

And then the link to their Twitter, we can find out more information. And then Max says, thank you again for your proposal. And this was just, I'm just offering him, offering to blast this out. I can imagine how hard to find time with the times of community growing fast, gratefully max. Well, thank you, Max. I downloaded the game. Under my Mac, I haven't had time to play yet too much time spent watching ponyplay videos this week.

But I am putting the links you gave me in the episode description this week. So if you guys want to like download this beta test, you know, free and play this game, it looks awesome. And Max designed the poster that we sold at live time sucks in 2019. And Max, we just gave all the proceeds, to the Dreaming Zebra Foundation. And we just got a big thank you yesterday, from them in the mail, so gratifying and just so cool

to see how many kids got ARP's art supplies. And they used them to make the thank you notes. And so big thanks to you because you made all that possible. So hail Nimrod. Next up, top shelf sack, Kiran Hamri. Coming in hot from the land down under. Kiran writes, cunt.

I just want to start by saying that being an actor portraying an Australian because it isn't real has been super shit over the past six months. Feels like Chiquitillo has been controlling the weather. When after, you know, the huge ass motherfucking fires we had, they turned on the rain, so hard we flooded. What's this big deal? A tunnel in the rain will stop fire, and that water too much.

And then for some weird fucked up reason, we started to hoard toilet paper first to protect ourselves from a virus, fuckinging actors and providing shit. Little bit about myself, I currently work in the emergency services as well as moonlighting as a shelf packer to bring an extra cash to the busiest jobs in the current climate. A little while ago, I had a particularly distressing call at work where I had to speak with the mother of a guy my age who had gasped himself. Usually things don't get to me,

but I'd been in this guy's position before and the call flattened me. Since then, I haven't been able to answer phone calls because of the fear that it may be the same sort of call. Anyway, since then, I have been working in the digital space and because I'm no longer working at shift work with my team, I have been doing so mostly alone. This got quite boring, and it didn't take long for me to find time suck, which has helped me through these shifts. More than you may possibly know, I'm not one to talk about issues, but having the knowledge

that if I reached out to spaces that I would be supported is a massive comfort. I'm working my way through the back catalog listening to two, three podcasts of shift. I have recently finished illuminati revealed episode 114 in it. You stated, I want to get this right. I think it's important today in today's climate to get shit right as much as you possibly can to be as factual as possible. I think this comment is so relevant with today's current issues. I've been saying that social media has spread COVID-19 quicker than the actual disease.

The fact that more people are listening to social media celebrities and celebrities in general rather than medical professionals just goes to show how stupid and gullible the world has become. I'll freely admit that social media has its advantages such as getting small businesses exposure including my own photography company, mad snappers, shameless plug. However, people don't research the information that they see and blindly believe it.

It leads to mass panic and hysteria and fucking toilet paper hoarding for fuck's sake. Anyway, sorry about the super long and dreary email. Thanks for everything you do. Hopefully you'll come to the warehouse where we film everything Australia related soon. Secret space lizard. Karen the hammer hammering. PS referring to someone as a content Australia is a term of endearmate and mateship. I loved it Karen.

Honor to be your content. Thanks so much for this and for reminding me that yes, accuracy is important. I do my best in this regard because I see so many others is spread half ass info, false info. It's infuriating. So much misinformation spread about COVID-19 in the past few months. It made research in last week's suck that much more difficult. I really hope to make it to sweet fake Australia to that warehouse soon. I guess in his pride in Southern California. I hope to make it to your fake country someday. He'll never out to you. And now a community shout out from dark star dark rights. Hey, suck master. you. And now a community shout out from Dark Star. Dark writes,

hey, suck master. Just wanted to take a minute and give a huge shout out to this community. My son's birthday is April 4th. He's stuck at home because of the shelter in place in Ohio. He's turning 10 and really bummed about not being able to see his friends or do anything. I went on to the culture, the curious Facebook page to see if anyone might be willing to send him a birthday card and the response has been amazing. These are the best group of people in the world. Now the group is trying to organize an online party for all the kids ducking quarantine on their birthdays. My family is so grateful to be involved with such amazing meat sacks, much love from the

stars in Ohio. Well, fucking yes. Yay to the coat of the curious. Happy birthday, little star man. If you listen to today's suck, you didn't just turn 10. You turned about 35. Love hearing how amazing our community is. The best.

Uh, thanks for being the best. And that one more, a funny one to end on. Kick ass meat sack, Kyle Pachin, Phil victim to Cummins law. Kyle writes to the motherfucker master sucker. Hey, Lucifina Goddamn it, Bojangle stop. Look in your balls and can someone please put on some Michael motherfuckin McDonald, longtime listener, loyal space is a right and in. I did not believe it was true,

but it fucking happened. Cummins law. I was listening to the Pinkerton Detective Agency, suck 116, and as I was walking through the operating room hallway at work, and I had just placed my phone in my back pocket, picture it, myself, two physician assistants, two surgeons are walking down the hallway to go to a case.

All is silent. And then out of nowhere, you hear, I would rather have my gang green and my dick rather than have gang green and my tongue. The cardiac surgeon I was with looked at me and said, well, we know what you're into in your free time. And then everyone laughed when I turned while I turned red in the face. Uh, thank you for bringing me this beautifully humiliated experience during this stressful time.

I will never more underestimate the laws of the cult. Uh, know that you have some loyal healthcare spaces or it's from Cleveland, Ohio. Seeking shelter within your cult to escape the grim reality we face in the front line to this pandemic. Hope to see you in May. You're ever faithful, meat sack Kyle. Uh, and on PS, Lindsey is safe from COVID-19 as living in Parma, Ohio. I just completed a small study proving

that the virus is too scared to go near pole X. Yes, thank you, Kyle. Yeah, I'm sure, I'm pretty sure Polish people are safe. COVID-19 is not yet jumped over to their species as far as I know. As far as I know, it's really only affecting human beings right now. Love that you share this. Thank you for working on the front lines. Stay safe as you can. Thanks for helping to save fucking lives. And thanks for sharing that story. Crack me up.

You know, I hope you get the kind of blow job I talked about earlier for your efforts or some awesome butt play. Or you know what, fucking pony play, puppy play, whatever you're in do, hail Nimrod and hail Lucifina. Next time, suckers, I need a net. We all did. That's all for today, Meat Sacks. New scared to death late Tuesday night.

New secret suck on Thursday. New album on Pandora right now. Get out of here, devil. Stay safe this week. Suck and fucking spank and gallopupin' Winni-Nayin' Keep on Suckin' you