Toni and Ryan - BONUS: It's HaloweeEeeEEeEEen Week!
Episode Date: October 27, 2021Or as someone messaged me on Instagram.... Halloweek. Sorry for losing my touch so early in the game. We chat Halloween Pickup Lines, Halloween in Australia, and the 1996 smash hit SCREAM. Love ya x C...heck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hello?
Oh, my God.
I can't believe it.
It's Tony and Ryan.
How are you?
I'm good.
How are you guys?
We are so nervous because I think we've stuffed up the time zone.
And, Jennifer, is it like the middle of the night where you are?
It's 5 to 11 at night, yes.
Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry.
No, don't worry about it. I've been up, so it's fine. Literally just then
Ryan goes, I think we've made a mistake here. And we were like, oh my
God, oh my God, oh my God, I hope she answers.
5 to 11 is a lot better than, I thought it could have been like 3am
or something. Oh my God. Hey, Jennifer, welcome to the Tony a lot better. No, you're all good. I thought it could have been like 3 a.m. or something.
Oh, my God.
Hey, Jennifer, welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast.
Hi.
Thank you.
It's wonderful to be here.
Now, where do we find you on this glorious day? It's midnight, mate.
She's in her jammies and she's ready to go to bed.
I mean, where in the world?
Not where in her costume.
So I'm on a little island called Vancouver Island off the west coast of Canada
in a city called Manila.
An island?
So is it like sexy island living, like on the beach all day?
No, we live in a rainforest,
so it's more like rubber boots and rain jackets all the time.
Wow, that sounds sick.
When you say rainforest, and, like,
forgive us for knowing nothing about Vancouver Island,
but when I think of, like, how cold it is a lot in Canada
and you saying rainforest, it makes me think of Shutter Island,
like the scenic, not the grossness of the story,
but, like, it's this island that's beautiful and green
and, like, looks kind of beautiful.
Is that kind of similar? Yeah, it's beautiful. It's green and green and like looks kind of beautiful. Is that kind of similar?
Yeah, it's beautiful.
It's green.
It's lush pretty much year round.
It's awesome.
Oh, wow.
That sounds amazing actually.
It just occurred to me.
I've just looked it up.
I've been to Victoria, which is that's on the island, isn't it?
That's like an hour and a bit from where I live.
How have you been there and you didn't even know what it was a minute ago?
This sounds so silly.
I didn't realize I was on Vancouver Island.
I just went to a place called Victoria and I knew that I'd been there
because I went on a boat from what would have been like Seattle
or somewhere up.
Yeah, you can catch a ferry from Seattle and from Vancouver.
Just a local, mate.
Mate.
That's it.
Me and Jennifer, we've been hanging out. Yeah, bros. Oh, bros. Oh a local mate. Mate. That's it. Me and Jennifer, we've been hanging out.
Yeah, bros. Old bros.
Well, I'm glad that the
Tony and Ryan podcast has made it to
Vancouver Island. Yeah.
From one Victoria to another.
That is poetic.
Jennifer, before you... Hey, there's an Abbotsford
just down the road from them as well.
Oh, is there? Oh my god. That's where I
blow those dudes.
Of course.
There's an Aldi there that everyone talks about.
Jennifer, before we get started,
do you give approval for this episode to go ahead?
I absolutely approve the podcast.
Oh, Jenny, bloody bless you.
Hi, it's Jennifer.
I'm from Vancouver Island and I approve this podcast.
You good?
No, are you good? Have I done something to fuck you off?
Have I done something to fuck you off, mate?
Yeah, I've done something to fuck you off.
Welcome to a Halloween special.
Mate.
Halloween.
Oh, sorry, my mistake. Welcome to a Halloween special. Mate. Halloween. Oh, sorry, my mistake.
Welcome to a Halloween special.
Do you like that?
Welcome also, if you're watching on YouTube,
this is our first full episode on YouTube.
Usually we're just a podcast and little snippets.
Yes, like TikToks and reels and stuff,
but we thought we'd do this because it's a bit fun.
Coming up today we have,
there's always a bit of a debate in Australia about, is Halloween
an American thing?
We're not allowed to do it here.
Fun police.
Yeah.
We'll also have a review of Scream that we've both watched in the last 24 hours, the original
1996.
Good job at remembering the year.
Well, the reason I know that is because when I typed in Scream into Netflix, there's like
a thousand different versions because there's like the TV show
and the sequel and I was like, I just want the Wikipedia 1996 one.
And do you remember as well because it like came out on your 21st birthday?
Is that an old joke?
Yeah, it was.
Do we do those?
No, we don't.
No.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Sorry, mate.
I was three when that came out.
I was born in 93.
Whoa.
That's cook day. Yeah, that is cook. Yeah. Speaking of cook, do we want when that came out. I was born in 93. Whoa. That's cook day.
Yeah, that is cook.
Yeah.
Speaking of cook, do we want to describe what we're wearing?
Yes.
So for anyone that's not watching on YouTube and you're just listening
to this pod in your ears, you can get it anywhere.
Ryan looks absolutely – I mean, you can if you want to.
Ryan's wearing an absolutely dashing witch's hat with an orange cobweb
on the top with a little spider.
And it's actually got-
I thought it was like a mullet.
Well, no, the cobweb is the spider's web.
Oh, my mistake.
Yeah, and then it's got a wig on the back, an orange wig.
And would you describe your head as a big head?
Or is this a child's hat?
Do you mean like egotistically or just physically?
I do have a big head and it's actually, this is so lame,
it's hard for me to find a hat because I've got a big fat head.
I can tell.
And when I was at the store, there was like a little aisle
at the supermarket because it's like Halloween time
so there's like the costumes and I said this on another episode
but I literally was looking through the stuff and I said,
hi, do you have this in a certain size?
And the person said, what age is the child?
Yeah, so I mean.
Oh, no, it's for this.
This adult person.
But I think you've done a good job.
Thank you.
And I also did some make-up on you but I will not take any ownership
over one part of it.
So I gave you a little scar.
But I did the smudge.
And a little skull and crossbones, which actually looks a bit
like a butterfly, and some winged eyeliner because I thought it went
with your witchy theme.
But you smeared white paint on your face like an American football player.
Yeah.
Why do they do that?
I believe it's the reflection from the lights.
It like...
Oh.
I think I may have just made that up.
It's got an actual purpose.
I believe it's not just to look like a gangster.
Well, yeah, I didn't know what it was for.
I mean, that's obviously why they actually do it.
Yeah, but it also has benefits.
I think because of something, yeah, about the lights hitting your eye and, yeah, I believe.
The sweat, like, bouncing off or something. Yeah, I don't know. But it's something to do with the light hitting your eye. Yeah, I believe. Like the sweat bouncing off or something.
I don't know.
But it's something to do with the light.
Oh.
Hence why it's black.
Did I play at night?
Yeah.
Are you joking?
Yeah.
No, I've never watched American football.
Friday Night Lights?
Oh, my God.
I get it now.
Yeah, no, I've never watched American football.
You are wearing a beautiful cape.
Thank you.
My mum made me this cape.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Oh, that's cute.
And you also asked me to draw a Harry Potter scar on you.
I said I don't know what that means.
Expelamos.
Yep.
Every time you do that, I think you're being the girl from Little Mix
pretending to do a Bahamas accent.
I don't know what that is.
Can I look that up?
Oh, Bah-rick-na.
Yeah.
Oh, is that not the thing I'm doing?
Yeah.
Bah-rick-na. Yeah, that's a vine. It's a really popular vine. Yeah. Oh, is that not the thing I'm doing? Yeah, that's a vine.
It's a really popular vine.
Yeah.
Anyway, so I asked Ryan to draw a Harry Potter scar on my forehead,
even though I've already got a massive fucking scar on my forehead.
What's the scar from?
I actually, I think that when I was little,
I like walked into a door frame and my head just split open.
Really?
Yeah, because there was like, do you remember those like it's
an old house thing, sliding doors that were like hung on a roller
so they don't like slide on runners.
It's like hung on the thing and you can like slide it across
but it's not attached to anything.
Like I don't really know what they do.
We had one of those and I think I might have been like running
through the door and maybe my sister like pushed it shut
and I went into it and split my head open.
And I got stitched up in the doctor's surgery,
didn't even go to hospital.
Tough bitch.
And then my dad took the door down.
He was like, we're not letting another injury occur.
Anyway, but Ryan said, well, I don't know what that is.
And I said, haven't you seen Harry Potter?
And he said, I don't like shit films.
We all know that Tony's Choice, not that Harry Potter may be one of these,
but Tony's Choice of movies, it's not your strength recommending good films.
It's obviously not yours either, mate, because you reckon Harry Potter's shit.
You're an idiot.
I just, when it's hard to believe, thus it's, you know,
it's a fantasy world or whatever.
I can't, yeah.
Like, that's not just Harry Potter.
Like, if there's things that aren't real or unrealistic,
I just can't get into it.
Mate, your favourite movies are bank heists and stuff like that.
That's not real.
Because they really are.
No, not the way that.
No one's ever stolen money from a bank.
Mate, but it's not like shit like Ocean's Eleven, 12, 13 and 8
are going on all the time.
I can't take you seriously with that.
The hair, the flick that you just did is so funny.
I also have taken my fake Halloween teeth out because it turns
out I couldn't talk in them.
Yeah, they look quite funny.
And I had a graphic mask as well and it also covered my mouth
so I would...
Yeah, so a lot of the things that you purchased weren't really ideal.
No, no, but I stand by them.
Lots of people who have found us, Tony, via Instagram Reels, TikTok,
have enjoyed the things you can say in the bedroom and somewhere else
or the original.
The pick-up lines.
The pick-up lines.
So we thought for our Halloween special,
we would have some Halloween pick-up lines.
Yep.
And I am ready.
To go. To be picked up. Hey, Ryan, show me a Halloweener. some Halloween pick-up lines. Yep. And I am ready...
To go.
To be picked up.
Hey, Ryan, show me your Halloween-er.
Sorry, did you say Halloween or were you wanting to say Halloween?
Nice.
Nice.
Are you a corpse?
Because you're making me stiff.
Rigorortis.
Oh, my God, like Rick and Morty.
Oh, that's so funny.
I was actually considering dressing up like a pirate just for this pick-up line.
Nice.
But I didn't because I couldn't find a pirate outfit.
Pretend I'm a pirate.
Should I imagine you're a pirate?
Okay.
Because I couldn't find a pirate outfit.
Pretend I'm a pirate.
Should I imagine you're a pirate?
Okay.
I might not be dressed up as a pirate,
but I know where I'd like to bury my treasure.
Oh, X marks the spot.
In you, by the way.
Oh, sorry, it's not over.
Oh, I just thought it was. Oh, no, it was.
It's always over before you.
Not in that hair.
What's up, boo-tiful that hair. What's up, beautiful?
Boo.
Oh, yeah, now.
Yep.
Like a ghost.
Oh, I hate it here.
I thought that was really funny.
I must be a zombie and you must be my first victim because I am ready to eat you.
That's quite sexy.
The hair. It's quite sexy. The hair.
It's the hair
is really doing it for me.
Hey, Ryan,
if you come home with me,
I won't ghost you.
Damn straight.
Yeah.
And hair.
Yeah.
Ectoplasm.
What's that?
It's from Ghostbusters.
And I'll never say it again, don't worry.
Hey, Tony. Hey.
I hope you enjoyed trick or treating, because if I can trick you out of those pants, I'll be treating you all night. That is sexy.
That's a sexy thing to say.
You're a sexy witch.
Thank you.
Did you know that the human body has 206 bones?
Want to give me another one?
Yes.
Oh, maybe similar to before.
This one if I was dressed as a skeleton.
Okay, yeah, great, great, great, great.
You might not find this humorous.
No.
But I would give you a bone.
Oh, yeah.
And hair.
Yeah, nice.
And hair.
Hey, Ryan, trick or treat, more like dick or treat.
I'll just love the aggression.
Yeah.
I feel like it needs aggression when you say the word dick.
Yeah.
Dick.
It's not the same as being like, hey, babe, do you want to.
Stop saying babe.
Stop calling me babe.
Hey, Tony, do you want to come here and suck on my thing?
It's not the same as being like, dirk.
To be honest, if he said, hey, do you want to suck on my dirk?
I still wouldn't.
It doesn't matter how he says it.
Tony, I'm going to call you.
Hey, Tony, I'm going to call you my scary werewolf
because you're going to be howling all night.
I like that one.
Oh!
That was such a good howl.
And howl.
Come back to my place and I'll show you more of where that came from.
Oh, my God.
I really like that.
I actually don't have any more, but that one was really good.
Thank you.
I'll make you howl all night.
Hey, Tony, you can call me.
Oh, my God.
Hey, Tony, you should call me your broom because, Tony,
you big witch, you're going to be riding me all night.
I'm dressed as a witch.
Well, wizard.
Harry Potter is technically a wizard.
Oh, sorry.
I'll rearrange my joke then.
You're my Nimbus 2000, which is a joke that you don't get
because you haven't seen Harry Potter.
It's a real waste.
It's occurred to me a lot during the week when we were talking
about costumes and when we were getting dressed earlier
that you believe Halloween is Harry Potter.
No, I don't.
So when we were discussing Halloween movies, I'm surprised you were like,
oh, should we watch The Philosopher's Stone
or should we watch Agrabah's Stone?
Prisoner of Azkaban?
Yeah, yeah.
There's been so much Harry Potter chat.
It's not a Harry Potter week.
It's Halloween.
No, I know, but I'm dressed as Harry Potter,
which is why it's making me think of that.
But it's not Harry Potter week.
I know that.
But you can dress as anyone.
Do you know that?
You can dress up as anyone.
That's very inclusive of you.
Thank you.
So a lot of people in Australia chat about,
every year there's sort of these party pooper fun police about like,
it's just an American thing.
Yeah.
Australians don't do it.
I know in my street, not just my area, my street,
which only has 10 or 12 houses,
I reckon four or five of them have like skeletons in the window
and stuff on the front fences and it's like fun and exciting.
I think it's really nice.
And I was thinking like even if it is from some other place,
isn't everything from some place?
Oh, you guys eat pizza.
It's more of an Italian thing.
Yeah, and it's fucking delicious.
It is delicious.
Oh, you guys are going to have curry.
Oh, it's a bit of an Indian thing.
Fuck off.
It's yum and I don't care where it's from. You know where it's going to have curry? Oh, it's a bit of an Indian thing. Fuck off. It's yum. And I don't care where it's from.
You know where it's going to be?
In my tum.
Myself.
Myself.
I was going to say my stomach and then turn into a wannabe gangster.
But I just don't understand this.
It's not from here, so we shouldn't do it.
Yeah.
Like, imagine how boring your life would be if you just didn't have fun
with other fun things.
And you never did anything from somewhere else.
Yeah.
I think, especially as a kid, and so I'm 27 now,
so it's changing a bit.
But when I was a kid, yeah, it was like absolutely not.
I remember my friends talking about Halloween and being like,
oh, my parents aren't into that and, you know,
oh, you can't let your kids walk around.
But, like, you do it before dark.
It's fine.
You know, it's in Melbourne.
It's daylight savings anyway.
It's light till 8.30, 9 o'clock.
So it's light till 8 o'clock.
And, you know, little kids are only going out with their parents
for an hour or two.
I actually love it.
My niece and nephews love it.
Like, they froth it.
They love getting to, you know, dress up.
Do you hate that you're in an apartment so you're not going
to have people come knock on the door?
I actually do hate that, yeah.
I think that there's probably been a post in our,
because our apartment complex has like a Facebook group.
Blame.
Oh, it's actually kind of handy even though a lot
of the time it is people complaining about like someone's parked
in my car park or like why is the mail room unlocked and stuff,
you know, classic.
But if someone posted in there and they were like, oh,
would you be happy for us to come to your house?
Hell yeah.
Like, I love it.
Do you want to come around to my place on Halloween?
Because we'll have kids come and knock.
Will you actually?
Yeah.
Because we're in the street.
Because you're in, like, a house.
Yeah.
And a little cul-de-sac as well.
Yeah.
A what?
A cul-de-sac.
A court?
A cul-de-sac.
It's actually called a court.
You don't live on a court.
I live on a street.
Yeah.
With a dead end.
But your street isn't called, like, Ryan's Court.
It's called Ryan's Street.
Yeah.
So it's not a court.
Or a cul-de-sac.
It's just a street.
No, but a cul-de-sac.
Anyway, we digress.
We got it.
There's a whole episode on what to call a street,
and it's as exciting as it sounds.
Yeah, it's very good.
It's riveting stuff.
But a few weeks ago we were talking, I don't even think it was on the podcast,
but you said something that I found quite scary.
Oh, Halloween.
Halloween.
Do you like The Simpsons?
I love The Simpsons.
Yeah.
Halloween episode, not for me.
What the fuck?
I don't get it.
Well, not that I don't get it and maybe not that I don't even enjoy it,
but if I sit down to watch The Simpsons,
and because you know how it's got like a Halloween intro.
Yeah.
As soon as I see that, I go, oh, a Halloween one.
I love the Treehouse of Horrors.
Because usually it's like three stories in one, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Maybe it's the believability thing or it's just like too,
I just love regular Simpsons so much I don't need a Halloween episode,
says the guy doing a Halloween episode of his own show
dressed like a fucking idiot.
Whose show?
Of their show.
His own show.
Congratulations on your own show.
I didn't say own, I said his.
You said his own show. As in like this is my show. Oh on your own show. I didn't say own, I said his. You said his own show.
As in like, this is my show.
Oh, is it? What's your show?
Actually, I've got a contract that
says actually it's 50-50. Well, it is
50-50, but it's still
I mean like it's not some other
person's show, it's the show that I do.
Oh, so is it your show?
If someone worked on the, you're fucking
having the time of your life. If someone worked on the, you're fucking having the time of your life.
If someone worked on The Simpsons and they were like, oh.
Our show.
Do you work on Will and Grace?
Oh, no, my show is The Simpsons.
That's the show I work on.
No, you wouldn't say that.
You'd just say I work on this show.
But if this is your show, that's fine.
I'm glad that I rock up to support you, mate.
I'm glad to be here.
I'm just the butter to your bread.
Mate.
Just the butter to your bread. The. Just the butter to your bread.
The heat is on you and you don't like it.
I don't like it.
I don't like the heat at all, especially because I've got makeup on
and it's starting to run.
And I don't like the heat because I'm wearing a stupid hat
and the heat can't get out through your head,
which is where the heat gets to.
Huge head.
I really like the Simpsons Halloween episodes.
So this is a little bit off topic,
but I actually love TV for all seasons of the year.
So at Christmas time, you know how everyone's like, I love watching Christmas movies. I love
that too. But I love watching Christmas episodes of TV shows because they're always so good and
they are wholesome as fuck. And in the last year, Stan, which is like a streaming platform in
Australia, which is what Scream was on.
Oh, I couldn't find it on Stan.
What did you watch it on?
I bought it on Apple.
You fucking idiot.
It's on Stan, mate.
Oh, fuck me.
Anyway.
I was like, good from Stan.
Yeah, that is good from them.
I'm surprised, yeah.
They did like a section and it was like Christmas favourites
and every single TV show that they had a Christmas episode
was in, like,
this one playlist, which I thought was so cool.
That is cool.
Yeah.
But I like Halloween episodes too.
I think they're really fun.
Well, yeah, now I just feel like a Grinch.
Oh, well, sorry that I love celebrating.
Yeah.
Oh, that makes me feel not like a Grinch.
Don't worry about it.
One thing I will say in defence of people who are a bit like,
I don't get Halloween.
Yes.
This is one thing that someone explained it to me and I was like,
you're right.
The concept of it's fun to be, like, scared and it's scary movies
and it's scary costumes.
Yes.
How fun is it to pretend to be scared?
I live in Australia.
We have snakes.
It's scary all the time.
All year.
You go for a swim in our country, you'll probably get eaten by a shark.
Sharks.
That's fucking scary.
Or Irukandji jellyfish.
Fuck off.
Jellyfishes are the...
Oh, no.
I've been stung by a jellyfish before.
On my face.
Did someone have to piss on you?
It was like literally right here.
Did someone piss on your face?
No, they didn't.
Do you want me to?
You can.
But no jellyfish.
Oh, jellyfish.
Oh, what?
No, they didn't.
Do you want me to?
You can, but no jellyfish.
Oh, jellyfish.
Oh, what?
If you open a cupboard, you'll probably get attacked by spiders.
Probably.
Or if you put your feet in a shoe that's been outside for more than three minutes, dead.
Have you ever seen those kangaroos kick?
They punch.
Yeah, they're fucked. Fuck that.
Emus, peck your face off.
So when someone says, oh, how fun is it pretending to be scared?
I live in Australia.
I'm fucking terrified the whole time.
It's scary all the time.
And also, I mean, the hole in the ozone layer, terrifying.
Skin cancer is a pandemic, epidemic.
Wait.
It's a pandemic of sun.
My hair's gone orange.
That's how hot it is here.
Hi, it's Jennifer from Vancouver Island,
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.
Every week on the podcast, we choose a movie.
The people in the Tony and Ryan Patreon
were given the options of about four or five scary movies and I didn't even bother
checking the final numbers because it was just scream.
The original, 1996, and I didn't read much about it beforehand
because you just kind of remember stuff in pop culture.
Yep.
We were having a field day with the, oh, that's that guy.
Yes.
Oh, she ended up being this.
Monica from Friends.
Was this, I think it was one or two years after Friends had started.
Yeah, so it would have been at the same time, yeah.
How did they get her?
I know.
It would have cost them a fortune.
Because were Friends big from day one?
Yeah.
Have you watched The Friends Reunion?
Bits of it, most of it, yeah.
Oh, okay, yeah, because they talk about that.
It's big straight away.
Basically, yeah, it just went gangbusters.
So for her to sign on to a movie
after two seasons, yeah, that would have
cost a fortune. To not even be the main
character as well. Yeah, I mean, she's
a big part of the story. Pretty big.
But it's when you, I guess as a whole,
you wouldn't say it's based on her.
No, definitely not. Yeah.
So is that where her and David Arquette
met? I assume so. Because they were married. They're not married anymore. For 15, 20 years. Yeah. that where her and David Arquette met? I assume so.
Because they were married.
They're not married anymore.
For 15, 20 years.
Yeah.
And they're like kind of not dating but they're like flirty in the show.
Yeah, they are.
And I, again, knew that but it wasn't until I rewatched it that I kind of went, oh, they got married.
Of course.
That's where they got married.
So I'd never actually watched Scream before.
Yeah, this is actually my first time.
So I watched it this morning.
I've never watched it before.
Have you watched Scary Movie?
Yes.
Did you get confused about which was which because they're so similar?
Yeah.
Well, and then the things that I felt like I remembered
from watching Scary Movie however many years ago,
that was a bit blurry.
So I was like, I think I know who, like,
the murderer is because of X, Y, Z and whatever. But I was way off. I know who like the murderer is because of xyz and whatever but
I was way off I thought it was so in scary movie actually it just occurred to me that you watch a
spoof movie without watching the original so literally every joke scary no but like how did
you enjoy scary movie because you didn't have any of the context yeah no so I just thought it was
like dumb and weird yeah um and like actually scary because I didn't realise that like the send-ups,
like the popcorn thing, you know, when she's doing the popcorn.
But in Scary Movie it ends up like bigger than an elephant.
It's like huge.
Anyway, I think from memory, please correct me if I'm wrong,
that in Scary Movie it's the cop that does it, right?
Oh, yes.
He's called Doofy.
Yeah. And so you're watching Scream going, yes. He's called Doofy. Yeah.
And so you're watching Scream going, oh, it's David Arquette.
And I'm like, oh, David Arquette has done it,
which obviously no fucking spoilers, it came out in 1996.
He didn't do it.
It is the boyfriend who is deathly handsome,
if I do say so myself.
He's also in, what's that show that's,
oh, that's going to really annoy me.
Oh, I don't know.
We're doing that thing that people hate.
When we try to figure out movies that's really obvious.
Yeah.
Riverside.
Riverdale.
Riverdale.
Right.
He's the dad.
Oh, sure.
But the first movie, as you said before,
if this is the first time you've ever listened,
we review a movie every week.
The very first movie we ever reviewed was He's All That,
the 2021 remake of She's All That.
Addison Rae is in the remake.
Playing herself.
As a TikToker.
She's Insta-famous.
And we were talking about the movie and we said, oh, my God,
the principal is the guy from Scooby-Doo.
And, Ryan, you said, yeah, it's good to see he got another job.
And we semi-roasted this guy.
Yeah, we were kind of like, fuck, he's been in nothing else.
All good.
Anyway, the episode goes live.
We get rim-jobbed online for saying that Matthew Lillard,
I'm pretty sure is his name, was from Scooby-Doo because he's fucking,
you know, like a return to form.
He's like the best actor ever. Well, he was in the original She's All That.
Yeah.
Hence why he was in that.
But we didn't know that.
Little did we know.
And then everybody was like, he's been in millions of things.
He's such an amazing actor.
He's so accomplished.
Like no one's a better actor than Matthew Lillard.
I don't think anyone said that.
No one went that far.
And then I flicked on screen this morning before you came
and picked me up for work and who's fucking in the movie?
Matthew Lillard from Scooby-Doo.
I literally was watching, and again, I've seen it many times before.
I know he's in it, but I was watching it and when he first comes on,
the first thing I did was look at Bridget and go,
this fucking guy again?
He's everywhere.
He's everywhere.
Is there a movie that we can review that he's not in?
That he's not in.
It's like when you are thinking about buying a car and you're like,
oh, I'll get a red car.
You never see red cars.
And then all you see is red cars.
Yeah, it's so funny.
So someone who works here got a Tesla and then I thought about a Tesla. Yeah, and then all I see is red cars. Yeah, it's so funny. So someone who works here got a Tesla and then I thought about a Tesla.
Yeah.
And then all I see is Teslas now.
Yeah.
Same thing.
And now I'm going to call him Matthew Tesla Lilliard
because they're just everywhere you turn.
But reflection on the movie, you know right at the beginning,
so where Drew Barrymore is like the first character you meet,
the whole movie would be fucked if she didn't have a cordless phone.
She does have a cordless phone.
But if she didn't have a cordless phone, the movie would have been fucked.
Why?
Because she picks it up, walks around, goes outside,
and her parents realise that she's been murdered because she's still
on the line and they, like, walk out and find her hung in the tree.
And I was like, if she didn't have that Uniden cordless phone,
the movie wouldn't have been good because she would have just been like,
I'm in the kitchen, and they would have been like, oh,
go to the front door.
She would have been like, I can't because I'm stuck in the kitchen.
I'm stuck here, yeah.
Because we weren't allowed a cordless phone as kids.
You weren't allowed it?
No.
Why, was it too risque?
I mean, we know what happened to Drew Barrymore.
I mean, of course you should.
Maybe my dad watched that and was like, no fucking way.
Not my kids.
I really wanted a cordless phone because you see them
in the movies all the time, on the babysitter's club,
they've got like the phone in their room.
Well, I think when the, because usually it's like the phone's in the kitchen and that's where the family is and so like you're talking
to your friends and like you you like want to talk about boys or something and you're like
yeah i can't talk to you about that right now chantelle like um and i really wanted a cordless
phone and my dad said that there'd be no way because do you know what people do tony they
walk around on the streets with their cordless handset waiting
to connect with someone else and then they make long-distance
phone calls and it costs a fortune.
He's made a jump to long distance because, oh,
you don't have a cord.
Oh, I'll just call Canada.
Yeah, no, but that he's like other people can connect
to your docking station if they've got the same type of phone
and it connects into your system.
That's not a thing, Dad.
No, there's just no fucking way.
No fucking way.
And so when I saw her with the cordless phone,
it did strike a bit of a chord for me because I was like,
oh, I wasn't allowed that Uniden phone and she had it
and it got her murdered.
Well, I was going to say, who did things work out better for?
Yeah, I'm alive.
Is it crazy to think that Drew Barrymore, because when you see,
like that's probably the most well-known scene is that sort
of start sequence, that you're like, oh, that's it for her.
Yeah, and then she's just gone.
Because we now know it's Drew Barrymore.
You assume, oh, she's going to be a big part of this movie
and she's really not.
And then she's dead.
Do you not realise that in Scary Movie her name's Drew?
Oh, I just never even. Goodbye, Drew? Oh, I just never even.
Goodbye, Drew.
Oh, I just never even.
Yeah, because you watched them the wrong way.
Yeah, I did watch them the wrong way around.
I loved seeing, for me, it was the people who have gone on to do stuff
and then the people who have not gone on to do stuff.
Not done stuff.
It was quite interesting as well.
But one thing that just irks me and I just didn't get
is how dumb high school people are.
Like if three people have been murdered and then someone rocks
up with a knife, would you go, oh, it's just Randy playing games?
It's like, well, maybe it is Randy playing games or maybe three people
of three real people are now real dead.
Maybe I'll just assume that a guy chasing me with a knife
is actually not a nice guy and maybe I'll just run instead of being like,
oh, Randy, nice joke.
Yeah, like, hope I'm in the sequel.
Like, fuck off.
There's a serial killer on the loose.
Fucking run.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
That really annoyed me.
I was annoyed, obviously, through the film.
I was like, God, her boyfriend's an arsehole.
He is.
Because he keeps, like, going, like, boo, and, like, rah, and stuff,
and scaring her, like, when he comes to the front door and he's like, ah.
And I was like, what an arsehole.
Like, she's really scared.
Her mother was murdered, God rest her soul.
And then he's like, oh, all good, like, you've been threatened
to be fucking killed and, you know,
attacked and raced through your house or whatever.
Obviously, in the end, he's not a nice guy.
He kills everyone.
I don't think he was a nice guy ever anyway.
No, but like it is then found that he's not a good person.
But the people in the school like running around with the masks
and doing all that stuff, like that's a really fucking shit thing to do.
Absolutely.
When actual people are getting actual dead.
Like you said, I can't believe it.
And when they're like, we're going into a curfew,
I was like triggered because COVID.
Same, I did think that as well.
But they're like, we're going into curfew, school's closed,
and they're all just like, fuck yeah.
Let's have a party.
And I'm like, hey, I don't know if you realise this,
some of your friends have been murdered.
Dead.
And they're hanging by their organs from trays.
Yeah.
I reckon just like even if a few days off might be great
because you don't have to go to school, I reckon just be cool.
And also they're in a curfew but the cop drops them off at a party.
Where underage drinkers are happening.
That's what I was like, are they breaking curfew?
Do they want COVID?
Do they know what's going to happen?
But then it occurred to me because I was the same thing. I'm like, I thought there was a curfew. Why are they going curfew? Do they want COVID? Do they know what's going to happen? But then it occurred to me, because I was the same thing,
I'm like, I thought there was a curfew.
Why are they going to a party?
And then there's this scene and there's like the smallest thing
to be going on.
They're like, oh, guys, party's over.
Curfew's almost up.
So they went to a party knowing that curfew started at 9pm.
So they're like, oh, let's go out and have a rager.
Got to leave by 8.30.
Let's break the law because we're underage drinking,
but then, oh, we better, like, abide by the rules.
But if someone goes, I'm having a big house party come around,
you need to leave by 8.30, would you just not bother?
That actually sounds really good.
Yeah, you're right, that's a good answer.
Oh, I'd love to stay.
I'm in the fucking curfew, mate.
I'd love to stay with the curfew.
I've got to go.
It's the law.
I ain't no lawbreaker out here.
So now that you've seen it, though, and knowing that –
actually, here's one more question.
Yeah.
I feel like it's an iconic movie.
Like, it's –
Definitely, definitely.
A genre-defining movie.
The fucking mask as well and everything, yeah.
Is it what it is because it's a great movie?
Not that I'm saying it's not a great movie.
Or is it just because of Courtney Cox and the mask has become part of society?
It's almost like a cultural phenomenon rather than like a cinematic phenomenon.
Well, I mean, nothing from back then really is that much
of a cinematic phenomenon because movies have come so far now.
Like when you look at like groundbreaking special effects.
Or like Shawshank Redemption though.
Yeah, actually, Shaw, of course, that kind of thing.
What's the one with Matt Damon and Robin Williams?
I can't believe I don't know that.
Good Will Hunting.
Like classic stories.
Yeah, that's true.
I guess like though with a scary movie,
the thing about it isn't that it's an incredible story except
for like hide and seek.
Did you think it was scary?
Scream?
Yeah.
Oh, I think it's spooky because I'm always spooked
when I'm home alone.
Yeah, yep.
But like in terms of what actually happened,
like my boyfriend's never going to kill me.
Like I can say that wholeheartedly,
100% Torbs is never going to kill me. Like, I can say that wholeheartedly, 100% Torbs is never going to kill me.
So, dun, dun, dun.
How awkward is going to be watching this back?
Yeah.
At my memorial when Torbs is in prison.
They play a video at the funeral and you're like,
well, here's where Tony claimed it wouldn't happen.
Yeah.
Or Torbs is like, it couldn't have been me.
She said wholeheartedly, I'd never kill her.
Your Honour, I present you Exhibit A.
Watch this video.
But it's you with that fucking wig on.
I also want to know, and maybe it means that I should just watch
the other ones, the killer dies.
So is the killer a different person in the other movies?
Because there's like five screams nows now or a fifth Scream's
like about to come out.
That's a really good point.
So is in Scream 2, is it the same characters but a different person
of them is a killer or is it like a different school?
Or a copycat killer or something?
Also.
Should we watch the second one next week?
For five weeks we just watched Scream.
And then we watched Scary Movie Art.
And then it all made you go, oh.
Oh, that's quite funny actually. I've watched Scary Movie ten times over the last 25 years
and now I actually understand some of the jokes.
Yeah, I actually should go back and watch that this weekend I reckon.
Scary Movie, as someone who like loves kind of like goofball comedies
and stuff, for me like that was just the pinnacle of, like, this is so funny.
Yeah, okay.
I'll have to watch it now that I've seen it.
And because we've watched He's All That or She's All That,
whatever the original, that's the basis of Not Another Teen Movie,
which is so great.
So good, yeah.
Finally, just before we finish up the Halloween episode,
can you pass me my mask?
This is so fucking funny.
It's so embarrassing.
So if you're watching on YouTube, let me... Oh, sorry.
Actually, can I show you all that work, you reckon? I don't know.
Is that in between you and the camera? Yeah. Alright, so this mask.
I would describe it as like a scary clown mask
and it's got like a jiggly eye because the eye's on a spring.
So it's kind of bobbling. Yeah, it's a pretty spooky mask.
And one of the eyes is bobbling
and the other eye just has a spring sticking out of it.
Now, I assumed that that was part of the look.
It's like, oh, it's a busted face.
It's got a spring hanging out, blah, blah, blah.
How cool, like it's got one good eye and one cooked one.
And, Tony, you saw this and went, oh, it's not a style,
it's just broken.
So you pulled it out of your bag and I said, oh, did you break that?
And you said, what do you mean?
And I said, well, obviously that spring hanging off is not supposed
to be like that.
And then you went, that's a really good point.
I thought this is what it was supposed to be like.
And, to be honest, it does look very spooky with only the one eye.
You look quite good actually.
See, I wore this last night when I, I'm sorry if this is really bad.
I wore this last night and the dog got freaked out and Bridget was like,
no, take it off.
Like Bridget didn't like it.
But you're saying you're attracted to this.
We're not attracted, but I can't see your face,
so you look pretty good.
Thanks for watching and listening to the Halloween episode.
Oh, my God, I love how you just did that as if you were finishing
hosting SNL.
It's been my dream my whole life.
Thank you so much.
The cast and the crew, thank you, Lorne Michaels.
The band tonight.
Jason Siegel for his puppeteering expertise.
He was fantastic.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Amazing.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for watching.
Absolutely love you and we'll see you next week.