Toni and Ryan - How Tall Will Your Child Be?
Episode Date: August 27, 2023I've never heard of this - is Ryan right? Is it a thing?!?! Love u xoxCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @toni...lodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge.
We are calling, I wouldn't say, because when I say God's country, it refers to-
WA, Perth.
But when I say the motherland-
New Zealand.
Yes. We are calling Mackenzie, who's in Auckland.
New Zealand. Oh, you just said.
Yes.
Spoiler. Spoiler. I already guessed where it was. Where are you going, Auckland?
Hello?
Mackenzie.
Hello, how are you?
We're good.
Are you going to come and see us in Auckland when we're there?
Yeah, hopefully.
Oh, you know, it's good.
Yeah, I don't want to interrupt her.
You don't feel like going out for a break that day.
Yeah, no, that's okay. You might have to wash your hair that day. Don't lock it in. Yeah, going out for a break that day. Yeah, no, that's okay.
You might have to wash your hair that day.
Don't lock it in.
Yeah, no, I'm planning on it.
Yeah, okay, great.
No, don't lock it in.
Something else might pop up.
Save it as a good third option, I reckon.
Can't remember what date it is, but we'll see you there.
Mackenzie, do you approve today's podcast?
Absolutely, absolutely approve today's podcast.
Absolutely. And for all our friends in Auckland, the 2nd of September.
Thank you.
I knew it was coming.
And both Mackenzie and Tony knew the date.
Yes, yes.
So there you go.
Yep.
Hey, it's Mackenzie from Auckland and I approve this podcast. Danger.
Danger territory.
Danger?
Welcome to the episode.
This is danger.
Danger, danger, danger.
Oh.
I'm going to ask you something and I'm going to ask you to be honest.
Okay.
And I'm not going to.
I'm panicking already.
I'm going to say I'm not going to take it personally.
Now, I do want you to be honest, but obviously I will take how you answer this very personally.
Okay.
But I need you to be honest.
Okay.
Say you and your boyfriend, Torbs, are having like, not a fight, but just like a disagreement.
You're like, oh, I heard this thing.
And Torbs is like, oh, no, I heard that wasn't right.
And you're like,
no,
I'm pretty sure it's right.
Yep.
If your boyfriend Torbs said,
oh,
but Ryan thinks it's true.
Would that make you more likely to believe it or less likely to believe it?
This is a cop out answer, genuinely it would depend what it was.
Like if it was like Torb said, oh, this is the best brand of chip,
and he went, yeah, Ryan reckons it is.
I'd go, well, that's fucking wrong.
But if it was like something real.
Mate, flavours of chips is the realest it gets.
Sorry, apologies.
First things first.
Let me fucking rinse my fucking mouth out.
That was a fucking slanderous comment from me.
But if it was like Torbs went, oh, yeah, have you read this thing?
And I went, no, I haven't.
And he went, yeah, Ryan and I were talking about it.
We agreed on this thing.
I'd go, okay.
And that would make me think.
What about the other way around?
If you said to Torbs, well, Ryan reckons it's true.
And he'd just be, yeah. What about the other way around? If you said to Torbs, well, Ryan reckons it's true. Oh.
And he'd just be, yeah.
Nah, he would agree that it must be right.
Nah, I reckon he would.
I've seen and felt that eye rolls from that bloke.
Oh, yeah.
He's just really smart.
There's not a lot of people that I would believe above Torbs
because he just, like, has this fucking spongy brain where like everything
that he reads he just like takes in.
So he is someone that I would believe like above anyone.
Torbs asked me a question the other day.
Oh, what was it?
He goes, when's Tony's birthday?
No, and I was facing him and I said my answer
and you were apparently standing behind me rolling your eyes.
And then Torb's called you out.
He goes, why are you rolling your eyes?
True or false?
That is true.
That did happen.
I don't remember the context.
It was mortgage stuff.
It was like, oh, if we applied for a mortgage for pre-approval
and because Tony and I work for ourselves,
so we don't have a job, so it's tricky.
And I'm like, oh, I just reckon this, that'll be fine.
And Tony just, of course, Ryan, bloody reckon.
Oh, Ryan thinks it's fine, does he?
That was because I'm risk averse and you are not.
So when you went, it'll be fine, I went.
No.
I actually do remember something.
And then Torbz went, why are you doing that?
I went, to be honest, you two must be on the same fucking team
and no one's on my side because I don't know why either
of you would fucking do me like that.
All right.
Let me take this away from the three of us
and ask you listening to this podcast and the tapas,
is there someone in your friendship group that if they said,
oh, it's true, you'd instantly go, well, it's probably not them.
A hundred percent.
Yeah, everyone's got one.
Because in our friendship group, that's Anders.
And if you don't have one, it's you.
Yeah.
And it's fucking Anders.
And it's Anders.
It's fucking Anders.
You've always said really nice things about him i thought you liked
him no you hate him you don't like him and you're not friends with him and this is one of the greats
well yeah that's what i thought but now it's seeming like maybe not i had a controversial
opinion on the weekend and my friends went oh that's what's what Anders said. And I went, well, I don't think it anymore.
Oh, so it made you change your mind.
Yeah, because I'm like, well, if Anders thinks it's true,
then clearly it's not.
I've worked with someone who was like, oh, they said that the other day
and you went, oh, okay, well, that's not fucking true.
I thought there was a particular age of children
that when they got to this age,
however tall they were, you just double it,
and that's how tall they'll be when they're older.
What?
That is the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard.
Oh, so they're one year and 10 months old.
They're 90 centimetres big.
Great.
They'll be 1.8 metres.
I don't know the exact time, but there's an age where you just double it.
Why did you think that?
Because then you can find out how tall your kid's going to be.
That's, what?
So, Anders is expecting a baby, and we've got a baby,
so we're, like, chatting about, like, how much they weigh,
are they going to be big, are they smaller than normal?
And then I was like, yeah, so what's that age when you just double it?
And all my friends went, oh, that's not true.
And I'm like, no, I'm pretty sure it is.
And they went, Anders reckons it's true.
I'm like, well, I don't think it's true anymore.
If Anders thinks it's real, it's fake.
There's no way.
Fake news.
Oh, fuck.
I've never heard that before.
I've never heard that as like a theory before.
Well, in theory, like not as a whole, but for individual people,
there has to be a time where you're half-
But it's not like a rule.
A rule.
I thought there was like a general like, yep,
when they're two and four months, you kind of double it
and they're going to be about that.
Right.
Obviously, that doesn't take into consideration growth spurts and the fact
that everyone's different yeah and genetics and fucking blah blah blah so there was probably a
time when they believed that was correct you know back when they didn't have like we'll say foresight
of change and differences and whatever if there's say four babies born on the same day would you
assume the one who's tallest at a certain age will probably always end up being the tallest?
Well, this may surprise you,
but I was always one of the tallest kids at school.
That does surprise me because you, in your own words,
don't actually exist.
Yeah, I'm negative height.
I said that last week.
I was always like at the back of the school photo
for like the first three or four years.
Really?
And they're back standing.
Yeah.
I reckon until like year four I was like one of the taller kids.
Yeah.
I was too tall to do gymnastics.
And what happened?
I stopped growing at four.
That's just what I've got now.
Year four, sorry, not four.
So God's like, let's stop growing the height,
but let's put it into boobs and ass.
Yeah, literally. Let's like, let's stop growing the height, but let's put it into boobs and ass. Yeah, literally.
Let's go sideways instead of taller.
But, yeah, so I don't know why that happens or whatever,
but I was, yeah, always one of the taller kids,
and my mum and dad were like, yeah, you're really tall.
And then everybody else started having growth spurts around me,
and I just never had one. Maybe this still not like maybe this week's your week still growing how long's the
growth but like a few weeks we just like i don't know i actually don't know because i don't remember
ever having one there was this guy we played volleyball with who grew i reckon 12 centimeters
in a year when he was 17 that's late to have like such a big grass bed. Like he was like 6'2"-ish and then a year later I'm like,
what the fuck happened to Paul?
He's 6'8".
Wow.
That's tall.
Yeah.
When do you reckon you got tall?
I'm not that tall.
I was waiting for my time.
Like I was always just sort of normal and then I was just waiting to like.
You're tall.
Yeah, but I like played volleyball so all my friends are way tall.
But like generally speaking.
I didn't realize I was slightly taller than usual
until I went to an accounting firm.
And I'm like, where are the middle blockers?
Who's playing opposite in this team?
Right.
Obviously no one.
They're all small.
And we're in an office.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's no support here.
Yeah, I know you're in an accountant,
but what position do you play?
Are you a Libro or a setup?
But I'm still not even that tall. But like were you always short you're in an accountant but what position do you play you're liberal or set up um and oh but i'm
still not even that tall um but like were you always short and then all of a sudden you were
tall or were you just kind of like always average height and like that was just i was always average
and yeah it was always see that's so weird to me because yeah i was like really tall as a kid and
then like through my life just wasn't anyway so, height aside. So obviously Anders reckons it's true, so I'm out.
Yeah.
And then we were trying to measure on people like what half of them is.
What your half would be.
So where in your person do you reckon halfway is?
For me personally, I'm just going to stand up.
Please.
So Tony's got her hands
like above her waist.
I reckon this is
exactly my waist.
I reckon that would be
about halfway.
I reckon you're about
two thirds.
It's way higher
than you think.
Yeah.
You reckon?
Yeah.
So now my hands
are at like my hip dips.
Yeah.
Okay.
And now here's where
it fucked me up
on the weekend
because my mate Tim,
how tall is Tim?
Like six five?
He's very tall.
So he points to, like, his waist and he goes,
are you saying a two-year-old would be this tall?
That's a good question.
I was like, no fucking way.
That's a great question.
But then it got me thinking about all the different spots
where halfway would be and how, like, messed up you are.
I think even when you look at kids and you go, as if you're that small,
but you're going to get bigger so slowly that I don't even notice.
And then one day you're fucking.
Do you reckon my junk is halfway?
I don't know whether you're more legs or.
Nah.
I've got stumpy legs.
Nah.
Yeah.
I reckon you're taller in the torso.
It's like your belly button, I reckon.
So where my belly button is.
Do you think Mabel will be that tall when she's two? Fuck no.
If she was, you'd be
worried, I think.
I'd be concerned. You'd be like, we're putting her up for
basketball immediately.
Get in there.
Earn some cash, sweetheart.
Stop paying your way. All these Sunday roasts.
Anders reckons
I should play basketball.
No, no, cancel.
Maybe golf.
Golf, golf.
Hey, it's Mackenzie from Auckland,
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.
A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon.
Antonia McHugh.
Good on ya, Antonia.
Or Tony, if you go by Tony maybe.
Ryan James.
Tony and Ryan.
Is that coincidence chat?
That's quite funny.
But when's his birthday?
I think I've almost maybe met his brother.
Evan Maidman, Sarah Tibbos and Christy Sutton.
Thank you so much.
Thanks, Sutdog.
Tony and Ryan, that's really made me laugh.
You laugh at that, but none of my gear.
Very selective.
Thank you.
So on Friday, Ryan announced that he is the hunchback of Notre Dame.
Notre Dame.
Yeah. And then he predicted that over the weekend that my boyfriend,
Torbs, and I would win at auction.
And we did!
Tony's got a house. and I would win at auction. Ah! And we did! Yeah!
Yay!
Sorry, he's got a house.
Can I just tell, I know you've got a story to tell,
but can I tell a quick story about how arrogant Nostradamus was?
Oh, why?
So I hadn't been inside the house,
and usually there's an open house, like 20 minutes before the auction, the doors are open,
go and have a final look.
And I said, all good, don't need to look beforehand, I'll go and have a look after she's before the auction, the doors are open, go and have a final look. And I said, all good.
Don't need to look beforehand.
I'll go and have a look after she's won the auction
because it'll be Tony's house and we can do whatever the fuck we want.
How did it play out?
Yeah.
Nostradamus, baby.
It worked out very well.
So my boyfriend, Torbs, and I, we've been together for almost 10 years.
We've been looking for houses for a little while and kind of like losing faith.
And because we've lived.
It's so fucking hard.
It's really hard.
It's really expensive.
And you just kind of have to like fall in love with something because you go, we're about to like, hopefully, we're going to spend all this money on it.
But then you don't get it.
And then you go, all right, we just have to move on.
It's like plays with your emotions a lot.
Yeah, it's fucked.
And anyway, so we have been looking for a while.
We didn't really know.
We didn't want to get our heart too set on anything.
We've also like lived in Richmond, like in the city forever,
and we've like moved way out of the city because like to get something
that we could afford and that we loved and whatever.
Who found the house initially?
Ryan found the house originally.
Timmy!
Yeah.
Well done.
You've won the auction.
Do you want to pay for it?
Actually, that'd be great.
No, but speaking of paying for it, how many years are you in for?
30 years, 25 years, something like that?
I think it's 30.
Yeah, cool.
So I've just taken a job.
I'm going to stop doing the podcast.
If you're the bank.
He's joking.
Yeah, and I'm back to picture partners.
Yeah, okay, great.
I'm an accountant.
I almost finished my MBA.
Okay, yep, just bringing the cold deli.
You got any jobs going?
Very good with that.
Need a deli, bitch.
I'm good with meat.
But so we'd gone through this house like three or four times.
We really, really love it.
We still love it.
It's stunning.
It's very Tony and Torbs.
It really suits us, hey?
It does, it does.
And, like, so I didn't know this, and for anybody else that doesn't know,
literally including me, fucking up to 24 hours ago.
So you kind of, everyone's, like, standing in the street
and everyone's, like, yelling and bidding and all this stuff going on
and every car that drives past drives past at like one kilometre an hour
to like have a sticky beak.
Would there be anything more awkward than driving down a street
and realising you're mid-auction?
Yeah.
And the people just standing in the street bidding?
So at the auction that we were at, there was like 50 people.
Yeah.
Like most of them just having a nosy.
Going once, going twice, going three.
Oh, sorry.
Just this way, sir.
Car, car, car.
It's like when you're a kid and you play, like, basketball on the street
and someone would be like, car.
And you'd all, like, just curse for a second and, like,
someone would grab the ball and then you'd, yeah, play on
and then you'd go back on the street.
Yeah, it's not like it's a big deal.
It's not like we're betting our life with a 30-year loan
and millions of dollars.
Literally.
I mean, like, just drive through, mate.
Yeah, you fucking take your time.
No, no, you go.
You actually go.
You take your time.
Yeah.
And so, yeah, I i had no idea but you're
out on the street and then when you win and they like knock it down as they say which i also learn
again um they go oh come inside and like sign all the paperwork and i was so fucking nervous about
this auction um because it was just a long time coming.
We really, really liked it.
We really wanted it.
Is it fair to say if you didn't get this one,
it would have stung a little bit more than the others?
I think that if we didn't get this one,
we probably would have stopped looking for a bit.
You should never do that, but, yeah, I agree.
But, yeah, I reckon if we hadn't have gotten it,
we just would have been like we need a bit of a break
because it's like the emotional side of things as well because you just fucking like it need a bit of a break because it's like the emotional like side of things
as well because you just fucking like it costs a lot of money as well like because you've got to
have inspections before you even build and like it's it's a really costly process like i'm not
surprised why people like fucking struggle because it costs a fortune um and that's not only on like
actually buying the house like the other shit costs money too. Anyway. And cost you your Saturdays.
Yeah, like every Saturday you're going and looking at houses
and fucking like how many coffees can you drink while you're out,
you know, trying to kill time because you go,
that one starts at 11 but, oh, this one's done at 10.
Anyway, so fucking real first world fucking problems.
But like anyway, so I didn't know that after they do the thing,
they bring you into the house to sign all the paperwork.
I did because I was not doing my inspection.
Ryan goes, oh, and so Ryan, Bridget and Mabel were there
and as soon as it got knocked down, I just burst into tears
and was really excited.
Do you remember the first words that you said?
Can I say them?
You can.
Do you remember the words?
I do.
In a blur of tears and like.
This is actually quite sweet.
Tony goes, my terrible jokes just bought a house.
They did.
They did.
I was like, mate, no one's more surprised than us.
Yeah.
And then anyway, so they get you inside and like you and Bridget and Mabel were there. Mabel chose her room. Yep. And Bridget's like, oh, do you mind if we come in? I was like, anyway, so they get you inside and, like, you and Bridget and Mabel were there.
Mabel chose her room.
Yep.
And Bridget's like, oh, do you mind if we come in?
I was like, no, please.
Like, because we also were like, we're the only ones that have seen this.
Like, we wanted someone else to go, yes, it is nice, almost.
Like, you need that second opinion.
And so we go inside and I was so nervous.
I was fucking panicking beforehand.
And I was like, I'm so sorry,
but, like, can I use the bathroom?
And they're like, mate, it's your bathroom.
Like, fucking go on in.
You can shit anywhere you like in your own house.
Even though I won't get to live there for, like, another two
or three months or something, but that's okay.
Did you still feel like you were peeing in someone else's house?
I felt like I was in a hotel.
Oh.
I was like, someone owns this house and it's me.
You're in a hotel so you stole all the soap.
Yes, I stole the poor people that still actually live there.
Where's all of our stuff?
I've walked out with the washing machine.
Why does this bitch keep calling me for ice?
Yeah, I'll get the cheeseburger and um anyway so i am i go in there and uh
that like the uh agent is like oh so excited for you guys whatever they give us the ipad it's got
all the stuff you've got to sign your name like a million times and we're really excited you guys
still looking around and whatever and you guys ended up heading off and then they go,
oh, so you have to pay the deposit today.
So you have to pay, like in our situation,
it was like you have to pay 10% upfront.
So $2 million upfront.
On the day, yeah.
And I was like, fuck, I'll have to transfer some money.
Did you guys take cash in briefcases?
It was absolutely not like that because about two hours later,
I get an email that our deposits bounced.
Really?
Yeah.
Why are you here now?
Yeah.
Why are you not at the back?
Is it still your house?
You shat in that place.
You're going to pay for that.
I stole the fucking washing machine.
How much room service did you want?
Seriously, what does that mean?
Mate.
I'm panicked.
Well, yeah, same.
And I go, well, I'll call them.
And they go, well, no, we don't work on Saturdays.
So it's like an automated like this.
If you're receiving this call, you have bounced.
Someone will call you on Tuesday.
Do you want to hear the worst fucking thing to read in your email addresses
after you fucking just bought a house?
Dishonor notice.
Oh, doesn't that really fucking kick a dog wild?
And I go, well, fuck, I hope they're not adding 10% to that 10%
because I can't fucking afford that.
Yeah, fuck no.
Anyway, and so- 2.2 million.
So there's this dishonor notice and it says, like,
your deposit has bounced.
And for anybody thinking about, you know, a house in Melbourne,
you can probably imagine what 10% might be.
Shit ain't cheap.
Can you print that out and frame it?
And so I go to Torb's, our deposit's just bounced.
How much cash got on your phone?
And he goes, what?
And I go, no, mate, I know that you think I'm, like, doing a bit here.
But I'm like, no.
I know I'm a hilarious comedian.
It's genuinely bounced.
Like, it has not gone through.
And so anyway, this is just, like, so ridiculous.
And then because on the weekend everything takes forever
and it's not like a small amount of money, so I'm like, well, what do I do?
We ended up like –
What do you do?
Well, we ended up like squaring away like this morning.
Like I get a call like it's Monday morning.
But the agent just goes, all good, call me Monday?
Or are they like – are they panicked?
Well, they were just like – whatever.
So did you change the limit that you can transfer?
No.
So the way that they do it, it like sucks the money out.
It's not like a transfer.
I gave them the wrong account details.
Is that a technical banking?
Oh, okay.
In here.
You fuck it.
So I gave them the details to an account.
So you tried to take the money out of someone else's account.
That's genius.
So I actually gave them the details of like a non-transacting account.
So it couldn't.
Like your savings account.
Yeah.
Because I was saving the money.
And so I thought that was the right place for it to be.
Turns out no fucking way.
You can't take money out of those.
You can only transfer it back to your like other ones.
Yeah.
And so I have like a question.
Sure.
What do you think is worse?
Your card declining on like a $4 coffee or a massive fucking purchase?
Because I've got a couple of thoughts.
A $4 coffee is like embarrassing because you go, fuck, it's only $4.
Do I really not have $4?
Yeah.
But you kind of go, oh, that's okay.
I've either used the wrong card.
I'll just transfer some money over. There's probably some coins in the dash. Yeah, I might have of go, oh, that's okay. I've either used the wrong card. I'll just transfer some money over.
There's probably some coins in the dash if I really.
Yeah, I might have some cash in the car.
Or a massive amount where there's no fucking way that you go,
I might have some cash in the car.
How much cash do you have in your car?
In fact, dare I say your car, your beautiful car,
would not be half of a 10 deposit
uh i think probably that like if if i say the cafe downstairs if i if my card bounced they just go i
just want to pay for two tomorrow and i go yeah so he's like would you just want to buy two houses
tomorrow you know come to the open i've got i've got to do an, do you just want to buy two houses tomorrow? You know what I mean? Come to the open.
I've got to do an auction after this.
Do you want to come and grab that one? Or does he just go back out to the street and go, so who was second?
Well, so that's the last thing.
I was like, do they put it back on the market?
Because they'd already listed it like as sold online.
So went that quick?
Yeah, but it had already gone.
So this was two hours later.
I get this email that's like the money hasn't come through.
And I was like.
Oh, so you'd left the house. Yes. yes oh so you hadn't just like sat there at the
table being like no because they're like yep it'll come through because they trust you they trust
people which they shouldn't so when i bought a place i didn't my um transaction account the
maximum daily spend was one thousand five hundred dollars, fucking how many days in a row do you have to transfer?
Yeah, can I just do it bit by bit?
And it turns out you can just go into the app and, like, up your limit.
But I didn't know that.
And, of course, you go, oh, I need 10%.
Cool.
Well, because that's what I said.
I was like, I'd transfer a limit.
And they go, no, we do it as, like, a deft payment.
So it, like, comes out, whatever.
Well, if you're giving the right information.
But I was like, literally, what would the outcome be? I'm, like, on the phone to my friend amy who was like doing all the house stuff for us
and i was like what would happen if i actually didn't have the money she was like i just asked
them that and they said they don't know they don't know they like they it's never happened
isn't there like a three-day cooling off period or something or is that not the case with an auction
i don't think that that's a case because with an auction they do that spiel at the start where they go,
once I knock it down, that's it.
That's it.
So do you own this house or not?
Well, so I think it's all been sorted and anything that hasn't,
someone actually just tried to call me so that might have been them being like,
it's either gone through or hasn't.
But, yeah, and, like, so I'm, like, sitting on the couch really fucking,
like, overwhelmed with excitement for the, like.
Stressed, overwhelmed.
What?
Tony Lodge.
Yeah.
I know.
Tony Fleece Lodge.
Yeah, weird.
I know.
Character flaw.
But so I'm sitting on the couch, like, feeling, like, really excited, really proud that we bought the house.
That's a beautiful house.
But also just, like, as if we've just done that.
Like, that's insane. Like, fuck, now we've got to move. And then I get this thing But also just like as if we've just done that, like that's insane.
Like fuck, now we've got to move.
And then I get this thing that's like where's your money, bitch?
I was like.
Is that what it said, Tony?
Is that what it said?
It said dishonor notice.
Can we frame that?
Obviously once you've paid it.
Oh, yeah.
Once it's all squared away and we know we've got the house.
So maybe we actually shouldn't pop the champagne too early.
Maybe we shouldn't be celebrating.
Yeah, unpop it because maybe we should wait until it's definitely squared away.
But I just was like, what does that mean?
I was like, this must be a prank.
We don't do pranks.
Yeah, but no, it wasn't a prank.
The money genuinely hadn't gone through and I was like, oh, my God,
I can send him a screenshot of my bank account, like whatever,
and they were like, oh.
We don't need proof that you can pay.
We need you to pay.
That'll be $4 for that coffee.
Here's a screenshot of my bank account.
Yeah, here's me proving to you that I have the money.
And they go, well.
Well, I need the, here's a photo of my coffee machine.
Yeah.
Well, congrats.
It's done now.
I think so. When you say you put the wrong code. Sorry, you already said that. It's done now. I think so.
When you say you put the wrong code, sorry, you already said that.
It was the transaction thing, yeah.
So I just didn't even think about it.
I was like, all the money.
And it's like, I wasn't transferring.
It was like coming out.
Like I put the details into their system for it to just like suck out.
I know I keep saying suck out.
I was going to say Cam's told stories about hooking up with guys
and he has never used the term sucked out or come out more
than you have explaining a house auction.
Yeah.
It's a really high-stakes situation.
Yeah.
But I'd love to hear about anybody's stories where they've really
embarrassingly had a decline.
A decline.
But maybe you were trying to like you're on a date.
Oh, the worst.
Or maybe. Oh, I did it and the person listened to the podcast oh it was at the vet oh the girl the
vet listens to tony ryan and she's like oh listen to the pod blah blah she's like how's it all going
i'm like it's going great well not that great apparently at the alpha vet on main road so she
like gassed me up hard oh and i was feeling like such a fucking yeah this
girl yeah this show i just you know going about my day people listen yeah i'm just a normal guy
very very normal yeah extremely normal um well it was just getting his toes clipped
i was like put the clips back on his toes yeah we'll see that's sticking back on yeah had you
already eaten the thing that you haven't paid for? Or had you already shit in the toilet that you hadn't paid for?
Yeah.
I'd love to know.
If anybody has a great card declining story,
please share it with us on today's thread.
It was very cute, you being like, excuse me, Mr Real Estate,
can I please go to the bathroom?
Because it's like someone else.
Well, the owners were in the house.
Yeah, that was weird.
Yeah, so I got to.
Is that why you didn't go to your en suite?
No.
Instead you went to the public bathroom?
So I didn't know that they were there, but I was like,
I know that they still live here, like their stuff's still in the house
and stuff.
So I was like, oh, is it okay if we go to the bathroom?
They're like, oh, my God, absolutely.
It's your bathroom now.
And then, like, we all made a big deal out of it but then like i found out that the owners were like listening to that and
i was like oh sorry yeah i used your bathroom i hope that's like like so weird you just gave them
up well we thought you'd just give them a lot of money i tried to i tried to um but anyway yeah so
i did meet the owners afterwards and that was a bit like, oh, she's just toilet.
And then they're like, oh, she was a lovely girl, wasn't she?
Like we probably walked out and they went, oh, well, she was nice.
Her partner was really nice.
But then they get the email going, where's our fucking money?
Remember that girl who took a mad shit in your house?
She hasn't paid.
Yeah, she didn't send any money through afterwards.
But anyway.
How are you feeling though?
Still like hasn't really sunk in. I'm really, really excited. I'm also just really proud. Yeah are you feeling though? Still like hasn't really sunk in.
I'm really, really excited.
I'm also just really proud.
Yeah, you should be.
I can't believe that we've like been able to work really hard and get down to it kind of thing and yeah.
It's crazy.
Yeah, it's crazy.
And I love the house so much that like I can't wait.
We actually like paperwork pending, obviously money pending.
I think we're going to be moving in when we're in America.
Yeah.
Is that good or bad?
Well, Torbs will be here.
So I think I'll, like, fly to America living in this house,
and then when I fly home, maybe all my stuff will be in a new house.
But it's lift a finger.
Moving sucks.
And I might conveniently, you know, miss it sucking, you know?
Yeah.
Okay.
I hear you.
I hear you.
However, are you going to get to the kitchen and go to get a glass
and you go, why is there?
Not where I would have put them.
Not where I would have put the glasses.
Or are you going to go into your room and grab a pair of tracky pants
and you open the drawer and there's shoes there and you go,
well, who made that decision?
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, that is a good point.
Maybe I'll just, as long as the boxes are there,
I'm happy to help unpack.
Or so he's going to sit around with boxes while we're gallivanting
around America.
That's a good point too, isn't it?
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know what the outcome will be, but maybe I just need to fucking
just let him unpack and then just cop it.
I think we've all been in a share house or a friend's house
where we've gone to get something from the drawer and gone,
oh, that's a fucking choice.
Yeah, or even something as simple as like the cutlery being opposite.
You know, when like.
Oh, go get yourself some cereal for breakfast?
Yeah, sure.
Where's the cereal?
Oh, yeah, it's below there under the bench.
Yeah, it's under the dishwasher.
No, no, that's not.
Below the dishwasher.
Fuck.
No, well done, though.
Well done.
Thank you.
Yeah, it's really exciting.
Huge, huge, huge.
I mean, as if that's not how you love to see it.
But I've got another way you love to see it.
I mean, we can't top that, but I'll just lob this one in.
That's okay.
My love to see it is actually Tapa Maddy-Dean.
Hi, Maddy-Dean.
It's her use of the term You Love To See It.
Oh.
A bit Inception, I know.
So she runs gym classes and runs a gym.
Oh, cool.
In Melbourne?
No, no, no.
And she said, I've started using You Love To See It when I'm trying to pump up my clients.
So it's like, drop and give me 10 and I'll like do 10.
She's like, yeah, you're killing it.
Love to see it.
That's better than a high five.
Way better than a high five.
But I love that tarpa terminology is like being incepted.
Into the community.
Yes.
And she's like, and when she goes, when I say it, people kind of go like, well, they like it.
Well, when we first started the pod two years ago,
hey, y'all, when you said,
I'd love to do this thing at the end of every episode,
just as like a nice G up,
because then no matter what we've talked about,
we'll end on something like wholesome
or like a great idea or whatever.
And I love that.
Then people go, I love the wholesomeness of it.
Tomorrow on the show, I've made an editorial decision.
I've got a story
that I'll share with you.
And what will I call this story?
How to make a man's day.
But there's this one...
No, not that.
With things you can say,
not suck.
Oh, sorry.
Cam, Tony, no.
Sorry.
There's one thing
you can say to a man.
And it's not sexy or flirty.
It's just very simple.
But I said it to a man this morning.
Could I just say this to anyone?
It's more of a, when you hear it, there's probably a female equivalent.
Okay.
But I said a word to a man this morning and I saw his whole day brighten
the second I said it.
That's nice.
And anyone can use this free advice.
So similar to her, to Maddie Dean saying you love to see it
and the person going, oh, that's a bit fun.
I've got something for you tomorrow.
Oh.
Yeah, and you can say it to me as often as you like.
Oh, okay.
And we can both say it to Cam as well.
Okay, I was going to say, yeah, maybe you could sing one his way.
Yeah, I'll sing one his way.
Yeah, okay.
Okay.
All right.
Cool.
You get a love to see?
I do.
This is quite cute.
I saw this online, and it's a picture of two baby elephants,
and it says, just learn that baby elephants suck their trunks for comfort
just like baby humans suck their thumbs.
And these two little elephants are like sucking on their little trunks.
Isn't that the cutest thing you've ever seen?
That is actually the cutest thing I've ever seen.
And it's like rolled back like into their mouth.
Cute as fuck.
That's cute, isn't it?
Cute as fuck.
Look, you love to say that.
You love to say that.
Thank you so much for listening.
We'll be back with some free advice as Ryan has described it.
Yep, some free advice.
We've also got confessions tomorrow as well.
Woo-hoo!
All right, we'll chat to you then.
Love you, bye.