Toni and Ryan - Mashies Update
Episode Date: July 19, 2023Normal or Nah and one night stand chat! Love ya!! T xoxoCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @rya...n.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Welcome to the podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge. This is Bryce in Brisbane.
Bryce-ben.
Bryce-ben.
Hello, Bryce speaking.
Hi, Bryce. How are you?
Get fucked. Hi, guys.
How are you doing?
I'm good. I'm good. How are you guys?
What have we interrupted? Are you at work or what are you doing? I'm good. I'm good. How are you guys? What have we interrupted? Are you
at work or what are you doing at the
moment? Yes, I am
at work at the moment. I work in
the events industry as a
technician and event manager.
So Bryce from
Brisbane, will you approve this podcast?
Absolutely.
Guess what I'm having for lunch?
Tuna and Bryce
That got the laugh it deserved
Hey it's Bryce from Brisbane
And I approve this podcast All right, coming up today.
I missed out on the one-night stand kind of era in my life.
Like, I didn't really have that.
And how do you feel about that now?
I feel fine because I have the love of my life
and I wouldn't trade that for anything.
But you'd like to.
But I get railed at home whenever I want.
Do you know what I mean?
When people go, oh, being single is great,
you can get fucked all the time, like same.
It's significantly easier.
Yeah.
I don't have to impress anyone.
He's pre-impressed.
He's like a done deal.
But I have a question about a friend of mine that did something
on a one-night stand, and I need player Ryan John to inform me
of whether this is all good.
Reformed player.
I wouldn't even say reformed player.
Previously.
Still a player. No, I was going to say. Stillformed player. I wouldn't even say reformed player. Previously. Still a player.
Still a player.
It was never a player, but was previously single.
Okay.
Previously single.
You did well for yourself.
No.
You did.
Yeah.
You did.
You guys are just sad living through my.
I'm not.
Mate, did you hear what I just said?
Nah, I didn't hear what you said.
But first, let's do normal or nah.
Okay.
People have submitted these in the Tony and Ryan Facebook group.
Now, Ashley Sword.
Hi, Ashley Sword.
Ashley says, normal or nah,
I won't flush the toilet if the shower water is on
or if I'm brushing my teeth.
Not because of the potential change in temperature,
but because I don't want pee water to come through the shower
or through the tap when I'm brushing my teeth.
I'm fully aware that's not how plumbing works.
Ash, you had me.
Now I think you're a dumb bitch.
I'm fully aware that's not how plumbing works,
but I just can't.
Is that normal or nah um i'm gonna say
nah for that reason yeah but i didn't do you remember we talked about this on the podcast i
didn't know that flashing the toilet did the temperature thing i knew that sinks and taps did
it or whatever but i didn't know like the toilet the dishwasher the washing machine i just never
thought about it.
And I was always doing it.
And then my boyfriend was like, hey, you know, eight years later.
You know, like, it's not as if, like, he's had this.
Has he been stewing on that for eight years?
Probably.
He's been thinking about it.
But he goes, yeah, it actually does the same as when you're at the sink.
And I also do this really annoying thing where if we're getting ready
to go out somewhere,
I always have a shower first and then I can start like getting ready while he's in the
shower.
And if I'm like putting on my skincare or makeup or whatever, like it goes on my hands
and I'm really funny about having clean hands.
So I have to wash them between each thing that I do.
So if I put something on, I have to wash them, put something on,
wash them, put something on, wash them. And in the meantime, Tobbs is getting squalid.
And he's in the shower.
And I'm like, just a quick one.
And he's like, it doesn't matter how fast it is.
Yep.
If it breaks the connection, the connection is broken.
It actually still does it.
Like you saying, oh, it's just a quick one, sweetie, sorry.
It still is the same thing.
Maybe he needs to shower first.
But then.
And he can wait.
Oh, yeah.
And he could just shower earlier and then I could shower at the same time
but he could work around me.
You know what?
You're right.
Yeah.
He can work around me.
But I've definitely never thought about wee water coming out of the pipes.
That's very funny though.
Imagine that as yellow it comes out towards you.
There's a little bit of poo in there.
That's enough for me, Ashley Sword.
Yeah.
Ashley Sword, Ashley Came, Ashley Conquered.
Fuck you guys.
I don't have to come in each day and do this.
I'm just letting you know. I don't have to come in each day and do this. I'm just letting you know.
Thanks.
Any other thing else you want to add in there?
No, that's okay.
I'd like to keep my job though.
That's okay.
Yeah, I don't have to come in, but please let me.
But please let me do it.
Jade Sneddon, who is a regular commenter.
Sneddo.
The big Sneddog.
The Arm of Sneddon.
Arm of Snedlebrity. The big Sned-dog. The Arm-a-Sned. Arm-a-Sned-lebrity, get me out of here.
Is it normal to look at the toilet paper between wipes?
My mum says it's dirty, but how else do you know if you're clean?
Surely the saying wipe to white comes from somewhere.
Normal.
I'm not even going to hold back on that.
Normal.
It is normal.
However, she goes, the saying wipe to white, I've never heard that in my life.
No, I've never heard that either, actually.
Oh, you know that old saying, give me 10 bucks.
I don't have any cash on me.
Oh, but the old saying.
Oh, of course.
Is this fine?
My iPhone.
Thank you.
You can't just be making up old sayings.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, a wife's tale.
Whose wife?
Yeah.
Whose wife said that?
Where were they married?
Show me the certificate.
Show me the certificate.
And I've been married 75 years.
I've never cleaned my toilet seat.
I have never heard that saying, but I do it.
It's the same like when you blow your nose and you look after.
You've got to fucking know what's going on under the hood.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think like to say, oh, I don't look at that.
It's disgusting.
I'm like, well, what do you mean?
Do you also like not look at your bank account when a bill's going to come out?
Like do you just trust that everything's all hunky-dory?
Imagine if you were shitting out your asshole and it was fucking blood red
and you go, oh, I bet I'm a lady so I don't look at that.
Like you've got no fucking idea what's going on down there. Got to check under the hood. Thank you. I could have stopped there, but I kept going lady, so I don't look at her. Like, you've got no fucking idea what's going on down there.
Got to check under the hood.
Thank you.
I could have stopped there, but I kept going.
No, thank you.
Yeah.
Mitch Watson asks, normal or nah?
Milk in cordial.
My sister says normal and swears it's good, but it's a big nah from me.
That's actually made me feel really sick.
Have you tried it before?
Nah, but you know what makes me
fucking want to vom? You know those
splice ice creams? Delicious.
Delicious. Yum!
Yum, yum, yum, yum. I love a splice.
The lemon lime
and the milky ice cream.
The red raspberry.
Tony, you're actually not feeling too well, eh?
We do have a rule.
That makes me sick.
That makes me so sick.
The thought of the cream with the fruit.
Okay, so we have many rules on this show.
And what's one of them about being...
I'm not allowed to make the dry reach sound because it makes people sick.
That's one of them.
Oh, that wasn't even the one you were talking about.
Another.
What do we think about judging things we've never tried before?
Oh, I'm not going to yuck someone's yum, but I have tried it.
No, you haven't.
You just said you haven't.
No, no, no.
I've had a splice ice cream.
Have you had milk in cordial milk?
Sorry.
No, I haven't.
Wow.
No fucking way.
We've got the orange flavor and the traditional raspberry of the Coddies.
We've got there.
And because I know we live in 2023, we've got the option of the soy milk.
Or I know you're an oat milk gal, so we do have some oat milk here, barista style.
So what flavour would you like?
Do we need to get...
I actually saw that and it looked like you were messing it up a little bit.
I'm going to go red.
Like a little raspberry milk.
I'm going to go soy.
I'm going to go red with oat, please.
Because.
What do you think the ratio would be?
I would have gone cordial first.
Because then the milk would have mixed up the cordial, you know?
That's okay.
Oh, and I know that cordial is not a thing in the US.
But cordial is like concentrate syrup.
Like the same that you would get.
What is it in America?
No, they just don't have it.
Because we've talked about cordial before and people are like, what the fuck is that?
What's the guy in the jug that runs through the wall?
That's Kool-Aid.
So it's a bit different.
Oh, okay.
It's like a spider.
It must be like strawberry milk.
My mum used to mix medicine in my strawberry milk.
Is that why she died?
Yep.
So we've gone opposite combos here.
Yeah.
So I'm a dickhead.
I didn't realise, and it's obviously obvious,
oat is gluten.
Oh!
I've never thought about that.
Yeah, so I was having oat milk because I couldn't have dairy,
and then I was like, oh, you're just drinking gluten instead.
Oh.
You're a big dickhead.
Some soy boy.
Oh, hello.
I think that this would be probably better with cow milk, like full cream.
Do you think it needs to be real creamy like cow milk?
Like taste the tea cream?
Yeah.
Oh, the color of that's not good.
And it's not mixing.
It's separating.
I said you should do the cordial first.
No, but the other one did.
Okay.
All right.
Well, you know, I'm a professional.
I'm going to give it a swirl like they would on a wine tasting.
Oh, this is not actually mixing with the soy.
It's just saying separated.
All right.
You can have a...
Can you stop doing that?
That sounds awful.
You can have a sip of mine when I'm done in about three seconds.
Can't smell anything.
This is fucked.
I hate this job.
It tastes like a melted splice.
I don't like it.
It's not as bad as I expected.
I'll give you that.
But it tastes like a melted icy pole.
Oh, how strong is the sugary smell of the Coddy's Cordial?
Yeah.
They've got like sugar-free and I was like, oh, what is it then?
Give me the original.
Oh, no, you need the real stuff.
Yeah.
It's like the new version of Froot Loops.
Don't have sugar in them.
Fuck off.
Then what's left?
I want Sugar Loops.
They should bottle that.
You know what it tastes a little bit like?
You know when you have like a chocolate-coated snake or something?
Oh.
I'm going to try this other one.
Yeah.
Oh, it's congealing.
Oh, that looks fucking cool, Kaz.
What's that called when it does that?
That's like when you reheat a carbonara and all the oil comes out.
It looks like a sauce that's split.
Yeah, it's split.
I'm not fucking putting that in my body.
No, no, no.
Okay, you know what?
Normal or nah?
I don't think it's normal, but it's not a nah.
It's a nah from me.
The second one's a big nah.
Oh, have a little sip of the first one again.
Actually, that first one's quite nice.
It's not that bad, but it tastes like a melted splice,
and that's not for me.
Ooh.
Have I got the ratio right, which I haven't.
It is quite – it's heavy on the red cordial,
but that's the best colour.
Red cordial is the best, closely followed by green.
Oh, see, I wasn't sure if I – because I thought green milk might do you in.
Yeah, green milk.
I remember making a – my mum won a milkshake maker from like a that's
life magazine or something and um she bought like all of these different like milkshake topping like
you know how you put like ice cream topping would you say it's like the um the soda stream of milks
oh you could say that um and she won one of those and she was like oh i bought like you know blue
heaven topping yeah and the lime topping and chocolate, whatever.
And I had a lime milkshake with my dinner, like the day she got it because we'd just been drinking milkshakes all day.
And I had a lime milkshake with like my dinner and that made me feel really sick.
Maybe that's why this is really off-putting to me.
I was really disturbed as a child when I found out that like Blue Haven wasn't a fruit.
Yeah.
Because you go, do you want the banana, the strawberry or the Blue Haven?
It's actually Blue Heaven.
Sure.
It's still not a fruit though.
No.
But I was like, a fruit, a fruit.
Don't know what that is.
Obviously, it's some kind of fruit.
Yeah.
So then you go to a market and you go, yeah, I'll get some Blue Heavens.
Where are they?
Can I get a container of Blue Heavens?
And then someone goes, well, they're not a fruit.
Then you go, then what have I been drinking all this time?
Yeah, it's just the colour blue.
Hey, it's Bryce from Brisbane, and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon.
Elliot Sebastian.
Thanks, Elliot.
Danielle O'Brien.
Oh, oh, oh, O'Brien.
Trine Martins.
Thank you so much, Trine.
Ali Parks.
Kate Butterworth.
And Alicia Kay. Fucking love to see it. Thank you so much, Trine. Ali Parks. Kate Butterworth and Alicia Kay.
Fucking love to see it.
Thank you so much.
Thanks, Kate.
I wonder if Ali Parks is related to Abby Parks from yesterday.
Okay.
You thought I'd fucked up and just said the same name again.
I did.
Yeah, I know.
And that's why I've looked back around because I was like,
you don't think I've done the right thing.
And I did.
And I'm really proud of myself.
I stuck to my guns on that.
Sorry, the cordials made me funny. Yeah, I'm really proud of myself. I stuck to my guns on that. Sorry, the cordials made me funny.
Yeah, I'm a bit burpy.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
That actually wasn't into the microphone, but it sounded like it was.
I'm sorry.
Today's testing me, guys.
Also, you know, I'm new fun Tony.
And this isn't new fun Tony.
This is not what I imagined.
This is old Tony.
Not what I imagined. Okay. Yeah, this is you, bye- new fun Tony. And this isn't new fun Tony. This is not what I imagined. This is old Tony. Not what I imagined.
Okay.
Yeah, this is you, buh-bye.
Yeah.
Take it away, Ryan.
Speaking of you being a player.
So, like I was saying before, I've never really had a one-night stand.
never really had a one night stand.
And as someone who watches a lot of TV, I assume that a lot of the tropes you see in TV shows are like accurate and true when-
Of course they are.
They're televisions.
It's TV.
But there's one that I saw recently.
It's in an episode of New Girl.
It's also in an episode of Mindy Project where-
Who did it first?
I guess New Girl would have been first.
Controversial.
Mindy lifting ideas, new for her.
And I was like, I wonder if this obviously doesn't happen,
but it's quite funny.
In the episode, Jess from New Girl, she goes out and she's like,
I'm going to get a one-night stand.
And she takes like an overnight bag with her to the club because she's like, I'm going to get a one night stand. And she takes like an overnight bag with her to the club because she's like,
I'm going to pick up tonight.
And she goes and she's got like all this stuff.
She's like, oh, pyjamas in case like I stay over.
And it's like, well, I do.
I was like, you're not wearing pyjamas.
That's okay.
And she's like, yeah, and comfy shoes for the next day so I don't have to like
walk home in my heels.
And, you know, all this stuff.
You see someone wearing heels early in the morning and you go, okay.
You go, how'd you go last night?
I don't know how to ask. Yeah, you already know. You see someone wearing heels early in the morning and you go, okay. You go, how'd you go last night? I don't know how to ask.
Yeah, you already know.
You already know.
It's so easy for girls.
Girls can do that because any girl can just go to a club and pick up.
I literally just said I've never had a one-night stand.
But you haven't gone out looking for a one-night stand.
Yeah, I guess so.
Yeah. I don't think it's necessarily, like, it's easier for anyone.
Yeah.
Except girls.
No, I actually disagree.
I don't agree with that.
I reckon it's easier for – I think if you're hot, it's just easier.
And that's the – like, it's not boys or girls or anyone.
It's literally just – if you're hot, of course it's going to be easy.
You know?
Yep.
As someone hot, obviously, you know.
As someone not hot, I also know.
And it wasn't easy for me.
Anyway, so my mate Ed took a pillow to a date.
Has he got some chiropractic? He's an osteo no he's like oh if i stay the night i just i a
soft pillow does be in and i'm my chiropractor that i have to use this one for my neck so am
i staying at your place because i'm ready to go because i've got my pillow in my back pocket and
i'm ready to roll is that the one he put it under her hips oh that's on my divvy said that she goes
oh what's with the pillow and he goes yeah i'll put this under your hips. He's like, I want you to come later.
So he brought this with me.
Anyway, so.
What was his reason?
Okay, let me rewind.
So my mate Ed, he met this girl like on Tinder or something.
And one night they go out for dinner or a movie and they're like, you know,
it's like the cutesy like getting to know you part and they're like all sweet
and whatever.
It's like the cutesy getting to know you part and they're all sweet and whatever.
And he drops her off at home and waited out the front to make sure she got inside safely.
That's nice.
That's a nice thing to do.
And it wasn't suggestive or anything?
He was just genuinely being a nice guy? He was dropping her off at home.
And you know those like in Melbourne how we've got like those terrace houses?
Yeah.
And basically the house is like one long hallway with like rooms off to the side.
Yes.
So you can like when someone opens their front door,
you can see like right down to the other end of the house.
Yep.
So as it happened, where he was parked on the street to drop this lovely girl off,
she opens the front door. where he was parked on the street to drop this lovely girl off. Yep.
She opens the front door.
He sees right down the hallway.
Yeah.
And that happens to be her bedroom.
Right at the end.
Right at the end.
And where her bed is, you can see her bed head and what pillows she had on her bed.
Oh.
So he's like standing at the door,
like making sure that she gets in safely before he hops.
He can see right down and sees that on her bed,
she's got like two really shit looking pillows on the bed.
Okay.
And he goes, oh, well, that's not going to fucking work for me.
That's not going to work.
I'm particular about my pillows.
And as someone who is also quite particular about pillows and bedding,
I get it.
Yeah.
Is that something you'd, I mean, when you're in the moment
of maybe hooking up with someone you met on Tinder,
maybe not a priority at that stage?
Well, I just don't think it's something I would look at,
make an assessment on, and then, like, act on it,
like do something about it.
I'd probably go
well that film was a bit crook no i actually don't even think i'd get to that point i think
i'd literally just be like okay like i just like my mind would be blank at that stage
anyway they like kiss each other good night he says goodbye and she walks in and she's like oh
my god yeah that's my room and he's like was i had such a great night. Then later, you know, they're texting and still chatting, whatever,
and they go, oh, like, do you want to go out again?
And he thinks, well, we're on here.
Yeah, second date.
We had a good time.
We've had a great time.
We're getting to know each other.
We've done the polite.
We didn't hook up on the first date.
We mean business kind of thing.
But there was a little kiss at the door or something like that.
Very nice.
Do you remember the first time you kissed bridget because i like very vividly can remember the first time i ever kissed torbs yep do you remember yep that's so sweet i'm not asking you
to share but isn't that nice that you can remember that i remember it with torbs as well and it's
like like gives me butterflies when i think about it. So he's in that first butterfly stage.
He's in that butterfly stage.
And anyway, so they're chatting and they're going,
yeah, should we go out again?
And she says, why don't you come over?
My housemates are going to be out.
Come over and I'll cook you dinner.
That's hot girl behavior.
That is a hot thing to offer.
Like I'm pretty sure that even if I offered to make Torb's dinner now,
after all this time, he'd be like, fuck, we're on here.
Well, you're not the normal cook.
No.
So it's like universally, I think you're making me dinner and then.
If I, I don't think.
Winner, winner, make me dinner.
If I started making dinner, Bridget would be like, what do you want?
What's going on here?
Yeah, I don't understand.
I smell a rat.
Yeah, what are you angling for? And
so he's like, oh my god, great.
Like, how nice. And he goes,
I've seen how
bad that pillow looked. Yeah.
I'm going to the house. She said no one else
is going to be home. Yep. I know what that means.
Should I take my own
pillow with me?
So he did.
He rocks up to her house. He didn't, like, leave it in the car.
Nah, he rocks up to her house.
He's holding the pillow.
Because you have to be presumptuous, right?
Well, I mean, I think it depends on the person and what you're like.
So even if she was planning to, do you think the fact that he was presumptuous would turn you off?
You'd be like, well, hang on, hold your horses, bud.
See, I think that's one of two ways you could take it.
Or do you go, yeah, we are going to fuck tonight.
I'm glad that you've prepared.
Or should I even bother with dinner?
Yeah, like should we do the pasta after?
So this is the question I wanted to ask.
Yeah.
And then so he was telling me this story and we'd had a few drinks
and I was like, mate, what did she say?
Yeah, what happened?
And he was like, yeah.
So I rocked up with my pillow under my arm and it was all fine.
I went in and, yeah, and like I had my pillow and we had dinner,
we did our business and then I slept like a baby on my beautiful pillow
that I brought from home.
I mean, if that's how it played out, then who are we to judge?
And this was like six years ago.
Really?
And they've been together ever since.
Isn't that beautiful?
Isn't that so?
I can't wait for the best man to tell that speech at the wedding.
No, they'll just play this from the podcast.
Pick play on Tony and Ryan.
First of all, I just have a comment on the Victorian-style terrace houses.
One night, I actually had a one-night stand.
I met someone at a bar in Collingwood.
And went back to their place.
I think it was in North Melbourne.
Let's call them Megan because I think they listen to the show.
Okay, great.
And so, as you said, the style of houses have one long hallway down the side.
And it's like all the things like poke off the side.
Yeah, off the side.
So the bathroom is traditionally way down the back.
Yep.
So on the night, I go down to the bathroom and I, you know,
I pee and whatever, you know.
And then I.
Sorry.
And I whatever.
What do you mean?
You go into the bathroom.
And pee and like, you know, wash my hands and, you know.
And then I come back out of the bathroom
and I look down the hallway and there's just four doors to the left
and I don't really know which one I came out of
because they're just doors.
They just all look the same.
And this is a share house with four different people in it
and it's about 2 a.m. in the morning.
And you don't want to make the wrong decision there, do you?
No, because God knows what's going on in those other rooms.
She still lives at home.
One of them's her parents.
Sister, brother.
Yeah, her little brother's playing PlayStation in the other room
and he's like, wrong door, dude.
Like, keep going.
So then one of the doors opens.
It's a real lucky dip.
Yeah.
No, a real lucky dip.
Yeah.
And then one of the doors opens and a girl who's not the girl I went home with walks out.
Oh, power of elimination.
You go, kick that one off, not that one.
But I'm standing there like a deer in the...
Because, again, I'm some strange man in a house full of girls.
And I bet you the housemate goes, who are you looking for?
And you go, um...
No.
You've got no idea what I'm saying.
But that's the thing.
And I don't know if this is, I'm not going to say what this implies
or assumes or whatever.
And she just goes, looking for Megan's door.
And I go, how do you know it's Megan?
She goes, it's always Megan.
Hot from Megan.
That's hot from Megan.
And the other fucking housemate, he's like painfully single.
She's like, it's never me.
Like, it can be.
No, okay, no, it's all good.
Yeah, I can walk into both doors.
I've already washed my hands.
Both of them.
Both of them ready to go.
I've got ten fingers and two doors.
And so she then showed me which door I had come out of earlier
and back into Megan's room and I walked in.
Then what happened?
Then you had your pillow under your arm and you were ready to go.
One other time.
I think I might have mentioned this on the podcast before about the –
because he's obviously brought his pillow.
It's the assumption.
And gone, I think I know what's going to happen here.
And I just got that air of confidence.
Yeah.
It's the same as, like, I think, like, shaving your legs before a date,
if that's something that will make you feel more comfortable
if you were going to hook up with someone or, you know,
like all those things where you go, I don't want to assume
this is going to happen, but just in case.
So my mate says, let's go to this party.
It's, like, out in some country town. And we're going to stay at my – says, let's go to this party. It's like out in some country town.
And we're going to stay at my, like his mate's place or his girlfriend's mate's.
Like just one of those, like, yeah, yeah, all good.
It was like a guy from the footy club.
And it's, yeah, you know, no big deal.
We'll just pile in and crash there.
But then I get to the house and his girlfriend.
His girlfriend was really drunk or something and had to go home?
Separate assumption.
Oh, fuck. That was different go home separate assumption oh that was different
no no that was even worse no but we get to the place where we're gonna stay yeah it turns out
like his sister had also said to her friends i'll just crash it and so we rocked up and there's like
oh we can't all and then he goes shit he goes there's 20 people looking for somewhere to sleep
and two couches and we're like fuck this is gonna And so he's like, oh, right, I'm really sorry.
I'm fucked up.
I don't know what to tell you.
So then you're in the middle of fucking nowhere.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
So we're about to head off to the party.
And I don't know where I'm going to stay.
And he goes, oh, I can drive you home.
We can do this.
We can figure this out.
And I just went, I'll find the place.
That's really hot.
Is it though?
I wish I was at that party.
So my house.
Yeah, did you need a place to stay?
Because I have my Apes room.
But it sort of, it feels weird because it's obviously the reason,
and you're just like, oh,, yeah, nice to meet you.
Yeah, you live around here?
No, you're out.
Okay, cool.
Have a nice night, mate.
Yeah, where are you staying tonight?
You don't have a place nearby, do you?
Yeah, so Dave Kelly picked me up in the morning
and we went back to Mildura.
What a beautiful time.
Was that the person who said, I just fucked the guy from Star FM?
Uh no
That was a girl
Oh sorry
Was that the same time?
Sorry oh my god
Same town
Oh my god
Sorry I'm just
Overwhelmed
It's weird when you like
Have a few drinks
And you're kind of like
Well it's actually not an option
It has to happen
Oh so it was like challenge mode.
Not challenge, boo.
Just like I just accepted that this is what was going to happen.
And I guess even if you didn't find someone to go home with,
you would have just like crashed at the park.
Like something would have happened.
Like you had to end up somewhere.
Yeah.
So like might as well fucking get one away at the same time.
Wow, okay.
Get one away
How would you go, Toni, going out on a night
Just not knowing where you're going to stay
I wouldn't go out
If I didn't know where I was going to stay
I'd be like, oh, I would just stay home
Like, how are you getting home?
I don't know
Where are you going to stay?
I don't know, I'll figure it out
And if I didn't know how I was going to get home or whatever
I would be like, oh, cool, I won't drink and I'll just drive
Right Like, that I would be like, oh, cool, I won't drink and I'll just drive.
Right.
Like that probably would be my solution.
And then when I was leaving, I'd be like, oh, I'm going.
Does anyone need a lift?
And then I'd fucking drive people home probably.
Yeah.
That's me.
Never had a one-night stand.
Do you want one? Maybe that can be like a fun story arc for the show.
Absolutely not. Because you know how that time
we did I Still Call Australia Home? Yeah.
And we like built up to it and we did this fun thing.
Yeah. And then we did a
live stream. Maybe our next thing can be like
Tony does a one night stand.
I don't want to do that though because I love my
boyfriend so much. Maybe he can be the
guy. A role
play. Yeah.
I've got a trench coat i think about so i got a
treadmill i was like we know mate you've got two um i was about to say we'll dress him up as a cop
but um but cam and i tried that already and that didn't work out well we would would a cop do it
for you though if like it was like a cop out on the beat um and he was like, hey, little lady, you need a little lift home? Hey, little lady. If he said that, no.
He'd have a moustache too.
Well, he does have a moustache.
Yeah.
So it's the same as now.
He's been preparing for this all his life.
No, I'm okay.
Thank you, though.
I'm all good.
Thank you.
Yeah, I'm all right.
Anyway, what do you love to see?
You can take a pillow.
What would be your personal item that you would take on a nightstand? Great question. Thank you. Yeah, I'm alright. Anyway, what do you love to see? You can take a pillow. What would be your personal item that you would take
on a night stand? Great question.
Probably comfy shoes
for the next day, I reckon.
That other time when I had
a one night stand after a boats and hoes party,
I had to do the walk of shame dressed like a slutty
pirate the next day. That's nice. And that wasn't
fun. Yeah, so I'd like some comfy shoes.
Yeah.
But I don't think I'm a staying over type.
I think if I was having a one night stand, I think I would go home that night.
I like to wake up in my own bed.
But what's one of the traditions of a one night stand is the morning one.
Yeah, true.
I have had a one night stand.
Anyway, what do you love to see?
No, it's not important.
It actually is very important.
It's not important.
It is very important.
Did they come back to your place or did you go to their place?
My place.
Oh, my God.
Did you have to boot them?
Because you're a rootin' booter?
Rootin' boot.
Well, after the night time, I was like, oh, goodness.
And they were like, oh, yeah.
And they rolled over and I was like, oh, okay.
And then the next morning it was like, well, might as well.
And then they left after that.
Okay.
Yeah.
And what personal item did you take to that?
No, it was at my house.
Did he have a personal item?
Well, he's, oh. He's dead. No, he didn't. What did you say? Nothing. Did he have a personal item? Well, he's... Oh.
He's dead.
No, he didn't.
What did you say?
Nothing.
Didn't say a word.
Can we fucking... This is enough.
I've had enough of that.
What was his name?
Megan.
My You Love to See It is lovely, lovely, lovely.
A message we got from Keely Marie on Patreon.
Hi, Keely. My You Love to See It is lovely, lovely, lovely. A message we got from Keely Marie on Patreon. Hi, Keely.
My You Love To See It is signing up for the Patreon.
After nine long months of listening from the start,
I'm finally here, baby.
Woo, welcome.
Don't know what I'm going to do with myself now that I can't binge
all the episodes because she was like bulk listening to five in one day.
But I'm happy to look at the episode threads and finally understand
what the fuck you're talking about.
I thought that was very sweet.
Thank you for sharing that, Keely.
Love to see it.
My love to see it is the Hungry Jacks mashies.
I am very excited about this.
Oh, hang on.
Sorry, I've got all the milks and the meals.
Yeah.
Let me take this cordial off your hands.
This has been a harrowing episode.
Yeah, a lot of food chat has been a harrowing episode. Yeah.
Yeah, a lot of food chat.
Two food props in one episode.
Oh, that's all sticky.
Ryan, why is that so sticky?
I think it's because...
Did you cum on it?
No, I think it's because of the barbecue sauce.
Oh, because you had little nuggets from Hungry Jacks as well.
Well, if we're bringing in Hungry Jacks,
we might be doing it properly.
And I just realised that I've got a little barbecue sauce in here
that might go well with a mashie.
No, it's got gravy inside the mashie.
So it's pre-wetted.
You can't do a sauce on a mashie.
So yesterday we talked about how Hungry Jacks have just introduced
their version of a mashie.
It's called a gravy tato.
Don't know if I agree with the title. So similar size to a mashie. It's called a gravy tato. Don't know if I agree with the title.
So similar size to a mashie from KFC,
but these ones have gravy on the inside,
which KFC actually did do with the mashies in, I believe, 2012
for a limited time only.
It's gravy on the inside.
Are we cheersing?
Cheers.
Cheers.
There's not as much gravy as I was expecting.
Dare I say it.
It needs a sauce.
It needs a little barbecue sauce.
It is pretty good, though.
I'm not unhappy about it.
Oh, hang on.
The second one I just had had way more gravy in it.
Same.
What's going on with the...
Must have gotten a dud one on the top.
The second one had way more gravy in it.
So I think if they were all like that, you've just had a third one.
Did that have more gravy in it?
It sounded like you were shaming my first one.
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm saying like as a controlled experiment.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
I would say they grow on you.
The more you mash, the better it gets.
They're more-ish, more mash-ish.
But Gravy Tato, disagree with the name, unfortunately, Hungry Jacks,
just letting you know.
But you'll have to see that.
You'll have to see it.
I wonder if these will also only be a limited time, though.
Aren't they a bit peppery? They're a bit peppery?
Yeah.
It's like a peppery gravy?
Was there a bit of pepper in the coating?
Or no, it would be in the gravy.
No, it would be in the gravy.
Cam, do you want one of these?
Sure.
Yeah, go on.
Thank you so much for listening.
Oh, we're doing a podcast.
I forgot.
Thank you so much for listening And listening to us eat just then
Yep
Appreciate it
Recommend the mashie
From Hungry Jacks though
Yep
Wouldn't drive past
Or drive through
If I saw one open
Nah
And they're 24 hours
Thank you so much
We'll do one
Thank you so much for listening
And we'll be back tomorrow
With a video show
See you then
Bye
Love you, bye.