Toni and Ryan - My Family Eats Out
Episode Date: October 4, 2023NORMAL OR NAH - and... a CELEBRITY AT THE SHOW?! Toni xoCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @rya...n.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author, best-selling Dr. Author, Tony Lodge.
Now, we are calling Cambridge. Is that where you studied?
No.
And we're calling Somali.
Ivy League, is that what they say?
Oh, no, that's in America.
A bit like it would be.
See, I'm so fucking stupid.
Hello, Somali.
Hi.
How are you?
We're so early.
Are we?
That's never happened.
I think it's 10 minutes.
It's just 10 minutes.
It's all right.
Oh, you know me.
Just always on time, being punctual, doing what I do.
Now, we were just discussing whether we would be smart enough
to be allowed into the town of Cambridge, let alone the university.
So, have you got any thoughts on that, Sam?
I think you guys will be let in because, you know, we love you guys.
So, yeah.
Not because of the academic prowess, though.
That's Somali.
Will you approve today's podcast?
I guess I will.
Oh, my God.
You really had us on a hook there.
Hi, this is Amali from Cambridge, but originally from Sri Lanka,
and I approve this podcast.
All right, coming up today, I've got some workplace email behaviour that you'll either go, yep, I'm all about that,
or it might make you panic and want to vomit.
And there's probably no one in the middle.
You'll either love it or you'll hate it.
I know I'm going to hate it already.
But there's a, yeah a yeah okay but we'll get
to that um and i saw a celebrity at the royal show oh my god yep and no wasn't looking in a mirror
no one thought that no one thought that um i saw a celebrity was it dave parsons
please don't fuck up my
no i got some texts that that a few people I work with
and a few of my friends may have bumped into each other at the show.
Just hanging out.
Hanging out the whole show.
And didn't I hear about it from every angle possible?
Did you?
We'll get to that in a minute.
All right.
But first, let's do normal or nah.
People submit these to the Tony and Ryan Facebook group.
And let's start with Phoebe.
Hi, Phoebe.
Every time I go to the bathroom at my workplace,
I choose the exact same stall.
Fair.
Having a favourite stall, normal.
Even though it's a bathroom for the whole office,
in my mind, that's my stall.
So, when I go in and someone else is using my stall,
I'll get super fucked off and mad about it.
Fair.
How do you?
Normal or nah?
Ask Phoebe.
Normal. Normal? We've got two toilets at work here and i've got a favorite one which one's your favorite um the one closest to the like kitchen
sink yeah i think that's been the designated like girls one because everyone who works here is a boy
and they're dirty so we all use the dirty one on the right to keep the other one so i get a nice
toilet but then also like when we had alice and roman in and she's like can i go to the bathroom
tony's like i was like do you want I go to the bathroom? I was so embarrassed.
I was like, do you want to go to the cafe downstairs?
Like I was really, really embarrassed, but that's okay.
And I've had some other like well-to-do people come through the office
because they're guests on another show and you go, oh, my God,
how embarrassing.
And you just go like hold it till you get home.
Shit in your BMW because honestly like it's not worth going in there.
Shit in your BMW. We'll pay for it's not worth going in there. Shit in your BMW.
We'll pay for it to get detailed after.
Yeah, just don't.
Yeah.
Normal or nah?
Giving compliments to your partner via your baby.
Because I've been doing this.
Oh.
For example, I'm in bed with four-month-old Mabel.
Yeah.
She's, like, propped up in bed.
Yep. And my wife, Bridget, gets out of themonth-old Mabel. Yeah. She's like propped up in bed. Yep.
And my wife Bridget gets out of the shower.
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah.
Okay.
And I go, hey, Mabel, can you believe I'm married to that?
I know, right?
What was she thinking?
What an idiot.
Nice.
And then I get her hand and like.
Fist bump her.
Yeah.
And I like high five her.
Oh, nice.
And I'm like, how good.
Yeah, your dad married that.
What a legend.
And then, but I know Bridget can hear it. Yeah. Oh, her. Yeah, and I'm like, high five her. Oh, nice. And I'm like, how good? Yeah, your dad married that. What a legend. And then, but I know Bridget can hear it.
Yeah, oh, yeah.
Yeah, so it's like a subtle little.
There's no door between your on-screen and your back bedroom.
And then so I know she can hear it and I know that she can't be like,
oh, what are you doing?
Because I'm like, I'm not talking to you.
Just hanging out with Mabel.
Yeah.
Do you think other people would do this as well?
I am going to say normal because I do that to people with torps.
What do you mean?
Like, I'll be like, oh, Pippa, look at your handsome dad
and stuff like that.
Do you go the other way as well, though, sometimes?
Talk to dad via Pippa?
No, like be a bit of a dick to torps via, like, oh, Pippa,
it looks like dad forgot to put the fucking bin out.
Oh, yeah, I did that because I said to,
I have said to torps about 900 times over the past six weeks,
I would say, can you please book in Pippa to her holiday place
for while we're in America?
I've also been told something similar.
And I've said...
Because so the reason that...
And before anyone says, why don't you just do it
tony because torbs is the one that has the contact with the like they have their thing like he has
done that they chat via text or whatever and like that's fine and so he is the dog holiday place
organizer and i have said for six fucking weeks can you please organize this because if it's if
she books out we have to find another place.
And, like, Pippa really likes her.
It's a really great spot.
And just that's where I want her to go.
It's where Torbz also wants her to go.
I know it's where Pippa wants to go.
And yesterday at 9 a.m., I said to Torbz, you need to book that today.
It's going to book out and there's no other places that we can send her.
Because we're going to get her to go there for two weeks.
Two weeks?
So the week that Torbs is moving house.
Oh, so he can just move in.
So that he can, like, leave the doors open,
doesn't have to worry about peep and stuff.
You know what I mean.
Is he going to miss her?
Be home by himself at night?
Yeah.
Being Nando's on the couch by himself, probably naked.
Well, there's probably no couch because it would have already been moved.
Yeah.
So he's going to be like, you know what I mean? I think it's just going to be easier and one less thing to worry about. Probably naked. Well, there's probably no couch because it would have already been moved. Yeah, fair call.
You know what I mean?
I think it's just going to be easier and one less thing to worry about.
And she's probably going to be a bit stressed because there's so much going on.
And he can't have her in the car when he drives because.
Don't be a dick.
Anyway, so.
How is he going to move without a car?
So, anyway, Pippa is going to go to the holiday place for two weeks.
I was like, you need to book it in.
And he didn't do it.
And then so last night I was sitting on the couch and I was like, Pippa, are you so excited to go to the holiday place for two weeks. I was like, you need to book it in and he didn't do it. And then so last night I was sitting on the couch and I was like,
Pippa, are you so excited to go to your holiday place?
And out of the corner of my eyes, C-Torbs go, fuck.
Just that silent fucking look away.
And I was like, yeah, because Daddy booked it today.
Are you excited?
Didn't he?
And he goes, me.
And I was like, you need to fucking message her tomorrow.
And he goes, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
Do you want to text him now?
Maybe I'll text him now and be like, hey, mate, just wondering.
No, go, hey, Pippa, has dad booked you in yet?
And then text back and go, sorry, wrong number.
I'm going to say, how did Jackie go for Pippa?
Question mark.
Very presumptuous. Yeah, like, oh, I know that you've done it. So, how did you go for Pippa? Question mark. Very presumptuous.
Yeah, like, oh, I know that you've done it, so how did you go?
Yeah, anyway.
So, yes, very normal.
I do both of those things.
Sarah asks, normal or nah?
Hi, Sarah.
When eating an Asian out, do you normally eat one each
or does everyone get something and you all share?
When eating an Asian out.
That didn't sound right, did it?
Asian takeout maybe?
Like when you get a Chinese for dinner?
A Chinese?
Like when you get a Chinese takeaway for dinner?
When you're eating out, eating Asian out.
When you're eating Asian out.
Oh, wow.
God, grandma is so important.
I recently ate out a group of friends, but they all got their own and, like, didn't share.
Oh, that's so weird.
It is weird.
Asian is designed for sharing.
I was super disappointed, says Sarah.
I agree.
And because you always want, like, a little bit of everything.
I love that we're both doing this with our hands because that's what it is.
Yeah.
No, but that's what it is.
No one can see that we're pointing around the table at the things.
The universal sign for if you go, oh, should we get an Indian?
Yeah, let's just.
To share.
And you just do the hand.
Yeah.
I think that's so normal.
When we were getting a table for inside because we didn't have a dining table.
Oh, yep.
And we're also now, Summer's here, like, looking for, like, an outdoor table.
I'm really excited about this because Ryan's getting a new table and I'm getting his old
one.
Yes.
For free.
And she's loving it.
Sick.
Question mark?
Yeah.
But you can organise, like, someone getting it.
Yeah.
See, I think I'll do an air tasker and I just can't remember.
I know a guy that lives in Reservoir.
Perfect.
Because he used to take-
Is it 12s?
Yeah.
Because he can't-
No, he's got a van and stuff.
He used to do some other stuff for us. Yeah, he's great. Oh, fuck yeah. He's a lovely guy. He's got a van and stuff He used to do some other stuff for us
Yeah, he's great
Oh, fuck yeah
He's a lovely guy
He's got a sick dog as well
Anyway
Is he okay?
No, like the dog is like
Don't go to the vet
So when we go looking for a new table
We're at the store going
Yeah, because when we eat
And we do the hands thing.
Yeah, you've got to do the hands, yes.
And Bridget says family style.
Yep.
Does that make sense?
Yes.
Yeah, because like the banquet, like it's like when you go to a wedding
and it's family style and everyone just.
Some of the tables are so thin.
I'm like, well, if I've got my plate and your plate,
how am I going to fit the things?
How can you?
And the salad bowl and do the thing and the thing and the things.
No, I totally agree.
You need to have enough room to.
Now, this is from Nikita and I don't like this. Hi, Now, this is from Nikita, and I don't like this.
Hi, Nikita.
I don't like it.
I don't like it.
Normal or nah?
As a kid, floating with your face down in the pool for as long as you can to see if anyone would care and try and save you, but no one ever does.
Normal.
No one ever came. How long could you hold your breath for probably not long enough
for them to panic um yeah and i'd probably i was like moving around probably um well i am actually
a very strong swimmer i did my bronze um so yeah um and so i was really good at holding my breath.
And so I used to think that I could do it pretty convincingly.
But yeah, they never came.
Maybe they were like, fuck, let's just see if it's real.
But maybe they were like, God, be a bit quieter.
Like, cost us less.
You know, one less kid.
There was four of us. So they're like, fuck.
One less mouth to feed.
Knock one off.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
And we'll just see.
Sorry, Torbs just texted me back and he said,
thank you for reminding me in a kind and thoughtful way.
Full stop.
Fucking good luck at the Houghton.
Do you want to come and stay at my house?
Yeah, I might do.
Go and do research.
Do you have a big table so we can-
Yeah, we're going to go over the thing, over the thing, over the thing.
Hi, this is Somali from Cambridge, originally from Sri Lanka,
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.
A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon.
That's Tapas, Tony and Ryan Podcast.
Jessica Meyer, Kate Patrick, thank you so much.
Candice Graham, Erin Brady and Crystal Bouter Halamachiek.
Halamachiek.
I've said her name about 9,000 times and I fuck it up every time.
Sorry, Crystal.
Sorry, Halamachiek.
You actually got it right.
Yeah.
Fuck. Anyway, Crystal. Sorry, Hal. I'm going to check. You actually got it right. Yeah. Fuck.
Anyway, we're in Auckland. Not tomorrow, the next day.
So, make sure you come on
down. Come on down for a shuck
and suck. What's it called? The Brito Mart.
Brito Mart. There's a little farmer's market.
If it's raining, we'll just be in the centre
bit under the cover. Yeah, there's a bit of space
there, but we can do photos. We can sign books.
We do it all. Bring it all on. Come on down. Yeah. And it sounds like there's not going to space there, but we can do photos, we can sign books, like we do it all.
Bring it all on, come on down.
Yeah.
And it sounds like there's not going to be that many people there.
There's not going to be anyone there.
So you'll have actually one-on-one time with us.
Yeah, plenty of time.
We'll probably take you out for a coffee or something.
Yeah, we'll take you.
There's going to be four of us there.
Yeah, we'll book out Shaka Brothers and we'll go for a group Shaka and Suck
and we'll have a great time.
No?
No.
Well, oysters are expensive.
Yeah, we'll have a coffee.
Okay.
But then we'll go to the Shuck and Fuck and then they can go.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because that's just like a romantic day.
And then we'll Shuck and Fuck off back to Australia.
Well, yeah, because literally our flight, we get there like Friday night,
like late Friday night, and then we leave at, what is it, like 3 o'clock?
After lunch.
Yeah.
So, we do the thing at 10 a.m.
and then we go straight to the airport.
Yeah.
Like literally, we are just coming for this.
So, if more people want to come, that'd be awesome.
Yeah.
Please justify the extreme price we paid for booking last minute. Yeah. Sorry that I are just coming for this so if more people want to come that'd be awesome. Yeah, please justify the extreme price
we paid for booking last minute. Yeah.
Sorry that I had COVID the first time, okay? I didn't
mean to. She's not sorry. So last
week on Friday
we had a public holiday here in Melbourne for
the grand final and I talked about
how I was going to the show. Yes.
So I got
a lot of messages and a lot of comments
being like, what is the show?
I don't understand.
They don't have the show in.
Well, in America, it's like a show day or like fair day or like a fete.
But they have carnivals, like when the carnival comes to town.
Carnival, yeah.
Carnival comes to town, circus comes to town, that sort of vibe.
So the show's on for two weeks a year.
And it's like.
The Royal Melbourne Show.
And it's like an agricultural kind of show.
Like, there's always like sheep being shorn and there's cows there and they have like
dog shows and things like that.
I'm pretty sure there's like-
When I was in primary school, you'd like submit your art and craft into the fair.
Do they still have that kind of stuff?
They do have that.
Or like a cake baking competition?
We'll get to that in Uno Memento.
Okay. So, then I saw a BuzzFeed quiz where it was going va-va-va viral online
that Americans didn't know what show bags were.
What?
So, someone talked about show bags like on a TikTok or something.
Yeah.
And everyone was like, what the fuck is a show bag?
And in America, they don't have them.
So, what do they do there?
They just, they don't buy.
I guess they buy like-
What do they do just day to day?
Well, I guess they buy like-
They just watch football.
Go to basketball games.
Yeah.
I guess they buy like knacks like-
Go to Farmer Joe's.
Well, Trader Joe's.
What did I say?
Farmer Joe's.
The Daylight Savings.
It's not open.
Do they have Daylight Savings in America?
I think so.
Yeah.
Anyway, like, you know on the Simpsons when they go to, like,
the chilli festival and they buy, like, jars of chilli?
I reckon that's probably a thing.
I think there was a thing when Bart and Homer were, like,
carnies once.
Yeah.
Like, that's what the show is, sort of.
That is what the show is.
A part of the show.
And there's, like, rides and stuff.
But show bags are, like, they're full of candy or toys or basically just full of shit stuff.
Did you get me the one I asked for?
You didn't ask me for a show bag?
Did I?
Someone check the tape.
I asked for a Birdie Beetle show bag.
Yes, I did.
Did you?
I did.
I don't have it with me and I just have to duck out to Woolworths because they sell Birdie Beetles there.
Anyway, so I couldn't believe that people didn't know what the show was
and I feel really bad for not explaining it.
But anyway, it's basically you walk around, look at stuff, eat stuff,
fairy floss, corn dogs, all that shit.
Anyway, we went into the Crafter Pavilion,
which is what you were just talking about.
So this year at the Royal Melbourne show, it was like,
it might be every year actually because this is the first time I've ever been,
but it was like sponsored by Spotlight.
Really?
So, it's like the Spotlight Makers Pavilion.
So, it's not a tent, it's a pavilion.
And I'm like, this is a bit of me because I love craft
and I was there with my partner Torbs, my sister and brother-in-law
and their two kids.
So, I think the two nephews could be taught a thing or two about arts and crafts because
last time they tried the arts and crafts, they, instead of saying, aren't toddy.
The A looked a bit like a C.
Yeah.
And so, I think they have some improvements to make in the craft game.
But my sister is also very into craft.
Right.
Like, so, we, I mean, she's a primary school teacher.
Of course she is.
So, yeah.
So, she's very into craft. And anyway, we see's a primary school teacher so yeah so she's very
into craft and anyway we see the craft of bivouac and i'm like here we fucking go we go in there
and as you were saying before ryan you can like submit art there's photos cake decorating knitting
felting quilting sewing uh just every single creative thing you can imagine and they've got
like a little wall for it that's got that stuff on it. And we walk in there and there's this massive double table
and with all these like free craft supplies for kids
to sit down and make something.
That's great.
And the boys, my nephews, were sitting down there
before we'd had a look around.
And who do I spy out the corner of my eye?
Ryan's best friend, Dave Parsons.
And the family?
And the whole fam, the whole Motley crew.
And so I turn around and I go, Dave.
And he goes, mate, give me a big kiss on the cheek.
And I saw his partner, Kimmy, and their kids,
and we were all chatting.
It was great.
And I was like, oh, yeah.
And he goes, oh, where's Ryan today?
And I was like, mate.
And we both had a good old laugh at the thought of you at the show.
Oh, did you?
Oh, glad you all had a great time. You all had a big old laugh at the thought of you at the show. Oh, did you? Oh, glad you all had a great time.
You all had a big old chuckle at your expense.
Oh, how about that?
I went, mate, anyway, yeah, Danny at the show.
That was really funny because Ryan hates crowds.
I hate crowds.
I hate lines.
I think I only went to the show once and it was with Dave and Fildo
when we were like 14.
And we went there and we went straight on a ride and I felt sick all day because I'd span around and my tummy was sore.
And then I was like, fuck this show and I've never been back.
Torbs isn't a ride guy either.
Those rides back in the 90s before there was like safety.
They just put you in this thing and it just spins and you like stick to the Gravitron.
Gravitron.
That's still a thing.
That's still a thing. That's still a thing.
Terrifying.
Yeah.
And then at the end it stops and you fucking just fall flat on your face.
Oh, I'm glad you all had a great fucking laugh.
We did.
It was a real, like, because it was quite early in the day.
Yeah.
And I said to them, I was like, oh, yeah, like, when do you get here?
They go, about an hour ago.
And I think we're about to leave.
Like, they'd already had enough.
Yeah.
And they were like, oh, we saw that you would come and we heard about it on the podcast
so we thought we'd come on down today.
And I was like, oh, influencer.
Has to use the code TonyLodge for 10% off.
Oh, I wish that was the case.
You know the tickets now for the show are like 50 bucks each?
What the fuck?
Cost Torbs and I $100 to get in together.
And you didn't even want to go.
Well, you did.
You did.
Did Torbs want to go?
Did Torbs want to go?
I wanted to go and I said to Torbs, do you want to go?
And he went, oh, yeah.
And I said, no empty offers.
I'm taking your yes.
Okay.
And then next year if I say, do you want to go?
And he goes, yeah.
I go, remember last year?
And he would go, yeah.
And I'll go, well, you've said yes again.
Anyway, so we're in the Maker's Display, in the Maker's Pavilion, sorry.
And they've got all this stuff.
And I've decided, open to discussion,
that we should enter something for the display next year.
I'll actually stop you right there.
What?
You used the word we.
You didn't use the word I.
So, I'm going to-
See, you keep using that word.
My goal, I think, is to enter to I think I'm going to. See I like you keep using that word. My goal I think is to
enter something that would be good enough
to not necessarily like win or place but
be on display because I reckon there'd be a lot of
rejects that don't even make it into the cabinet you know what I'm saying
But if you get put in the cabinet isn't it like a
commendation or a
distinction or. Some of them so
there's like first second and third and then there's like
highly commended. Yeah commended
that's what did I say?
Yeah, you said commendation.
But like not all of them have that ribbon.
So, what area is he talking?
So, there's a cake decorating one, which we've done cookie decorating.
Remember when we did that for Christmas?
That was quite good.
You can see that on YouTube.
I mean, it was good as in it was fun doing it. I don't know if it was like good.
But I mean, if you've had fun doing it, isn't that the prize?
No, because you said the prize is getting into the show.
Yep.
Okay.
Well, and then there's photography.
What a great excuse to buy a good camera.
Fuck, anything is a good excuse for this Tony to spend money on.
Exactly.
Use once and never use again.
Uh-huh.
That is your area though.
It is.
Is that a category on its own?
It is.
Yes.
And here is the I bought it once and never bought it once. I thought you meant the photography.
No.
Yeah, just put our photo next to the treadmills on the stand-up paddleboard.
Thanks, mate.
Sorry, that cut a bit deep.
Oh, my God.
You could win an award for nastiness.
Oh, my God.
Do they have that?
No, they don't have that.
Anyway, but I thought that'd be really fun.
Okay.
And I'll do one, but we could do one together
and we'll enter it in the show next year.
Okay.
What do you think that you'd be good at?
What are my options again?
Not cake decorating.
Okay, not cake decorating.
There's like knitting and sewing and stuff.
Bridget could do knitting.
Does that count?
Yeah.
If I contribute maybe a little bit.
No, no, no. It has to be your project. There's like knitting and sewing and stuff. Bridget could do knitting. Does that count? Yeah. If I contribute maybe a little bit.
No, no, no.
It has to be your project.
Okay.
Yep.
There's like photography.
Yep.
Art.
Like so you draw something.
My mum could do that.
Okay.
Well, again, Mandy can do that, but that's an individual entry.
Yeah.
And then what else is there?
There's like little sculptures.
Oh, sculptures.
That's fun.
Is there a little like things you can say at the show and also in the bedroom category?
No, there isn't.
Okay.
We could do that as well for fun though.
Yeah.
Yep.
No, but I want an award now.
Yeah.
Now I've tasted the-
Yeah, you've tasted it.
But then there's like also a cabinet and it's like the top five banana breads, the top five
chocolate cakes.
And like you can't taste them obviously, but the judges taste them when they're fresh and
they get to-
How do you feel about cheating?
Fine.
Because you know how.
Because you know our friends, Locke and Zoe,
that run Greasy Zoe's, the restaurant in Hurstbridge.
Yep.
Have I mentioned them before?
She is unbelievable.
I'll tell you what's funny.
When I say that.
At baking or.
Cooking.
Yeah, yeah.
And at life.
She's unbelievable. No, but And at life. She's unbelievable.
No, but the way you-
She's unbelievable.
If you tasted her stuff, you would react the same way.
And it-
You know, I heard it.
I heard it.
Oh, my Atlanta.
I heard it.
What surprises people when they find out the two of them run the restaurant is that he's
like the front of house waiter and she's like the chef.
And a lot of people just assume it's the other way around.
I actually-
Immediately my mind went to her being in the kitchen.
Yeah, right.
Not, oh, my God.
Oh, right.
Oh, come on, mate.
No, no.
That is absolutely not what I meant.
No, I meant like-
Are these dishes going to wash themselves?
Because obviously, like, my favourite chef is Alison Roman.
Oh, of course.
And, like, so I'm like, oh, yeah, she must be a fucking belter chef.
Yeah, well, she is.
And I reckon she could whip up a killer banana bread
and we could probably put our name on that. Okay, well, no, we can't do that. And I don't think you can even do, like, a box mix. I think you've got to, well, she is. And I reckon she could whip up a killer banana bread and we could probably put our name on that.
Okay, well, no, we can't do that.
And I don't think you can even do, like, a box mix.
I think you've got to, like, do it.
Well, she...
No, I'm saying, like, we couldn't even just, like, do a box mix.
Though I was thinking about buying a KitchenAid for the new house.
Oh, bread!
Is there a break?
Is there sourdough?
Is there sourdough?
No, there wasn't.
Fuck.
There wasn't, actually. I mean, we've got time to workshop it. But don't you think that's fun? Yeah. Like a break out? Is there sourdough? Is there sourdough? No, there wasn't Fuck There wasn't actually I mean, we've got time to workshop it
But don't you think that's fun?
Yeah
Like a fun project
Yeah, I do
And we could do that
Do they have exploding watermelons?
They don't
But maybe we could
Should we live stream from the craft tent
And do 50 hours live from the craft tent at the show next year
Sit at that like free kids table
Yeah, for 50 hours straight
And we'll make one craft thing on every hour for 50 hours.
That sounds like a dream of mine I've had.
That sounds amazing.
Do you know what we could do with the Smashing Watermelon, though?
We could sketch the moment it exploded and enter that as a sketch.
I like that.
As art.
I like that a lot.
You did flirt with the idea of running into a celebrity?
It was Dave Parsons.
Oh, sorry.
Yeah.
It was actually Dave Parsons?
Yes.
He is a celebrity.
Yeah, I know.
So, literally, when we were at the show, my sister went, who's that?
And I said, oh, it's Ryan's best mate.
And she goes, Dave Parsons.
Did she?
Because she listens to the podcast.
Yeah.
Which will re-
So, did he text you and say, we've just seen Tony at the show?
No.
Oh, I thought he must have messaged you as well.
Nah, he didn't give a fuck.
You said you heard about it from all angles.
So I was like, oh, they must have mentioned it.
Yeah, from you and your texting and your emails.
I sent you one text.
No, Kimmy and I send daily photos of our children to each other.
Cute.
Yeah.
And I was the picture on.
He's my child.
He's a little sweetheart of the show.
I've got you love to see it here.
And you'll either love this workplace email behaviour
or it'll make you want to vomit.
Pamela tweets.
Hi, Pamela.
I once watched a colleague return from maternity leave,
highlight all in her inbox and then just delete all.
When she saw the look on my face, she shrugged and said, if they really need to talk to me,
they know where to find me.
I understand it, but I wouldn't do that only because I'd be like, oh, there might be like
a gift card in there.
Someone might have sent me a present.
Oh, I've still got a present from you somewhere in my junk box.
Yep.
That I gave you for your birthday.
Yeah.
Yeah, so don't delete.
Don't delete all because there might be a little present in there.
But you know, like you take 12 months off and nine months ago,
there was one email about, oh, there's cake in the kitchen.
Oh, yeah.
See, that stuff I think obviously is like, and an email from nine.
But are you going to go through for a whole year and find,
or you just go, hmm?
Something from nine months ago, though, is probably being dealt with.
So, I think it's pretty safe.
Maybe I'd scroll through the last like two or three months.
Do you reckon it'd be funny to reply to the one from nine months ago
and to be like, oh, any cake left?
Yeah.
Ah!
You reply all to the whole office.
Everyone hates that.
Yeah, they do.
When I worked in an office once where someone was like a, just like would always reply all and you'd be like.
Who was it?
Oh, it's not important.
I think it is.
It's not important.
But like.
Tell me who it is.
Nah.
It's not important.
Which workplace?
It's not important but it's not important but and you just
knew that when an all office email went out that like three minutes later there was going to be
another one back and go with like some shit joke or like and then someone else would bite and go
please don't reply all but they would reply all and it's like such a slippery slope all of a sudden
everyone's replying all everyone's email do we have a big enough workplace that a reply all is an issue?
Well, and we use Slack between the three of us.
So, a reply all is just like a group chat.
Oh, keep it to yourselves.
You know, that's kind of the same thing.
But bold.
Yeah, it is bold.
And it's bold recommending that on the podcast.
You rock in at 8.58 in the morning.
First day back for a year. Roll up to the computer. Delete all. Click. And it's bold recommending that on the podcast to do that. You rock in at 8.58 in the morning, first day back for a year,
roll up to the computer, delete all, click, and then go,
righto, go get a coffee.
The thing is, though, that sometimes when you come back from leave,
that the few hours where you go, oh, just still going through my, like.
That's free swing.
Yeah, because you go, oh, I'm actually just catching up onto the admin.
Although what about if your boss emailed you the previous afternoon being like, when you get back, here's a list of tasks?
Well, that's at the top.
I start from the bottom.
Yeah.
I'll just do this.
See you later.
Might love to see it.
Oh, there have been some sketchy recommendations given on this podcast.
Ryan is the worst at it, I will say.
What?
But.
I've been good. I do
have actually a feather in your cap for
one of your recommendations right here is why you love
to see it. Is it Wham? Because it's a kind
gift to you. No,
it's not Wham. Elona Thomas
sent this to us in our Patreon.
I have a you love to see it.
I recently went whale watching on a
catamaran.
Okay. Okay. Righto.
Okay.
Righto.
Enjoy your Wednesday.
Like, okay.
Sure.
And I can confirm that the free hot chocolate served on board is deliciously thick.
I thought of you guys through both cups that I drank.
Oh, holy fuck.
And I would too, but you'd be shitting after that.
You couldn't go whale watching. You'd too, but you'd be shitting after that.
You couldn't go whale watching.
You'd be so thick you'd stay at the top.
It's not scuba diving. It's like watching from the boat.
Because that would be like swimming with sharks.
This is just like whale watching.
You heard what I said.
You really fucked this up.
I was actually giving you a free...
Drinking a compliment, yeah.
You fucked up my celebrity hook and now you're fucking this up as well.
You should have stayed home today, mate.
Did Dave Fastens have hot chocolate?
Oh, didn't he let you know?
He didn't.
Anyway.
Nah, it is a hot recommendation.
And as we're about to take many, many flights together...
We're going to be drinking a lot of hotties.
Are we going to get a hottie on the way to Dallas?
I'm just going to get diarrhea, I think.
Do you remember Christmas last year
when we did a live stream for our champion tapas on our Patreon
and Bridget was pregnant and she was in the hospital.
Yeah.
She was fine, but you'd been in the hospital overnight. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I was as well. And she was like in the hospital yeah um she was fine but like you'd been in the hospital
overnight yeah yeah um yeah oh i was as hell and she was fine um but yeah so she was okay obviously
um but you were like hey i'm not gonna make it and i was like all good like i'll do it
and it was to make the hot chocolate from the santa claus oh yeah and i was on the live stream
and i like mate it's basically like drinking ganache and then i'm on the live stream and I'm like, mate, it's basically like drinking ganache. And then I'm on the live stream and I'm like,
anyone got any questions?
I'm like chatting along and I was like, yeah, cool, got to go
because I drank like a litre of cream because I was like, wow,
this is so good.
And I started just drinking it and I was like.
Yeah, and when you're live streaming alone, you can't just go.
I was wearing a onesie as well.
So, it was dicey.
It wasn't good.
Yeah, that's a risk.
I saw this TikTok. I don't know. So, it was dicey. It wasn't good. Yeah, that's a risk. That is a risk. I saw this TikTok.
I don't know if I sent it to you guys.
It was this guy said, I'm lactose tolerant.
And his thing is like, he doesn't like lactose, but he will tolerate it if he's in a place
to tolerate it.
Oh, yeah.
So, it's like-
Close enough to a toilet or-
Yeah.
He's like, if I'm at home, I'll drink the liter of whatever.
Yeah.
But I think we can all agree if there's one place you don't want to feel ill, it's on a plane.
On a plane.
Oh.
That's why I don't understand how people can drink on a plane.
Because when I drink, I don't feel well.
Right.
And I feel really dehydrated and stuff.
And what is the thing?
Three on the plane is the one on the ground or whatever.
No, one in the sky, three on the ground.
Whatever.
And it just makes me so dehydrated.
I just don't know how people do it.
So I don't know if I could have a big thick like sweet drink.
What if we get two hot chocolates each and three beers each?
That's the opposite of what I just said.
That's like 25 on the ground.
Each.
I'd make the trip go fast.
We'd both be asleep.
I'd both be throwing up in the toilet.
Waking up hungover.
Gross. We'll be back asleep. I'd both be throwing up in the toilet. Waking up hungover. Gross.
We'll be back tomorrow with a video show.
Tomorrow, the robots are taking over Tony and Ryan.
Tony and Ryan podcast video show.
AI is here.
And it'll be taken over.
Do I have to do anything?
Do I get the day off?
It's actually the opposite of do you need to do anything.
The AI will do it for you.
So do I get the day off?
Should I not come in tomorrow?
No, I think you'll want to see it, though.
Oh.
Because the future is here and you'll want to witness it firsthand.
Wonderful.
Yeah.
So then I could have next week off something.
Am I getting any time off?
I haven't planned for it, but, like, when I play you some examples,
like, maybe.
Okay. Maybe we could just, like like take the year off next year and just
let AI do it. But don't tell anyone. Maybe we won't do that. No, we won't
do that. We'll not do that. We will be back tomorrow. Live.
Insert laughter here. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Sorry. Sorry, everyone. That was the robot. Wasn't that good? It was Tony left
half an hour ago. Yeah.
Seriously, we've got an AI machine to play with.
Oh.
That's good.
All right.
See you tomorrow.
Sorry.
Not that kind of machine to play with.
Don't do the... I didn't do anything.
We're not in a float tank at the moment, Matt.
Float tank.
More like, love you, bye.