Toni and Ryan - One Single Jimmy Can
Episode Date: April 6, 2025Truly the saddest sight - but gift, or garbage???? Love ya xoxCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodg...e and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hello and welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name's Tony. This is my vice captain Ryan.
She's a captain, obviously.
And we never start an episode without a Tapa approval.
Yep, a Tapa is a Tony and Ryan podcast.
And Catherine is in Pennsylvania.
Now it's Catherine's son's fourth birthday today.
Oh, happy birthday.
But she said, I've been trying to get an approval spot
for ages.
Now Catherine, be honest.
What did you write on the form?
I said, I've been waiting to get an approval
for a long time and
despite it being his birthday I was approving this podcast for that little
I actually thought Ryan like oh that question was a bit nasty but no that's
what it said on the form. Catherine would you also approve this podcast?
Absolutely.
Amazing.
Legend.
Hi, it's Catherine from Pennsylvania and I approve this podcast. Before we start the week and we like to start in a really good mood and we are definitely
in a good mood.
It's fucking Monday and this is happening again.
Charles and Lily don't know what a cicada is.
I don't know what's so difficult about a cicada.
They're those little insect things.
They go eeee.
Yeah and they like rub their feet.
It's a cicata.
No you're thinking of a rice cracker, a cicada.
Yeah, cicada, great biscuit, great jingle, not a fucking beetle.
Do you remember that jingle actually came about in like, it was an Australian Idol collab?
Cicada.
Yeah.
Yes.
Lily's wandered over the desk.
We're on by the way.
Go on.
Talk into the microphone if you want to fucking the way. Go on. Talking to the microphone
if you wanna fucking say something.
Sorry. It's a cicada.
You're thinking of a cicada.
You're thinking of a cicata.
No, no.
Do you know what's good?
A salada.
That's what I've been thinking about this whole time.
But you guys were actually,
Tony and I are talking about cicadas.
Yeah. The little things.
Yeah. That look like cockroaches
that rub their feet together. And they go, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, reeee, Weetbix Vita Brits and I hate it. And they say things like togs. I've literally never heard anyone call a Weetbix a Vita Bix.
It's a Weetbix.
Are you thinking of a Vita Weet?
They're good too, they're hard.
I think Charles is lashing out because we questioned his use of the work credit card
and he ended up on the floor yesterday.
Okay, but we're all in a good mood.
Second time you've been on the floor in three weeks.
We don't do that. No, the other day when you posted on your Instagram story that he was on. Second time you've been on the floor in three weeks. We don't do that.
No, the other day when you post on your Instagram story
that he was on the floor, he's always on the floor.
Oh.
Just get up.
What do you have to?
Okay.
Now that we've added everyone else.
Oh, you were making a sex joke.
I thought you were.
That's fucked up.
That's our employee.
You're acting like a real secant.
Now that we've added everyone else, Tony,
I think it's our time to look in the mirror.
And talk about old people.
The habits of the elderly.
Now, the reason why this is an issue,
this article,
I don't know if Buzzfeed's got it wrong,
or if Tony and I...
I'm going to have to sort of run it. BuzzFeed have never gotten it wrong. Every time I find
out what pizza topping I am, they are bang on. And if that's not journalism, lock me
up.
Yeah. Throw it away. Do they do BuzzFeed quizzes like an elective now when you're at journalism
school?
It's like a unit you can study.
That's very funny.
Do you want to do true crime, political analysis or is there a Buzzfeed quiz making course?
I'm actually doing my major in journalism and my minor in quizzes.
All right.
So now that we have established the buzz.
Can you imagine it? That's what the buzz actually was. But it would actually, all jokes aside, if you did three or four years of a degree in
journalism and didn't learn how to do that, what the fuck are you doing for three or four
years?
You'd be dumb as, obviously they don't have it, but it's dumb not to have it as much as
we're taking the piss right now.
Because let me tell you what I'm clicking on.
If I see two two articles, right,
side by side, and one of them says new political information and one of them says what you do in
the morning will tell me what pizza topping you are. I'll tell you what I'm clicking on every time.
Do you want clicks or not? Pick a pair of shoes and I'll tell you your favorite shape. Yeah.
Nike's barbecue shapes. Nailed it. Done it again. So we've established BuzzFeed's Never Wrong.
Yeah.
So I think when I read this-
So tread carefully.
Yeah, so when I read the habits of the elderly,
I think, Tony, have you and I aged four or five decades
over the last year or so?
Probably.
Because-
My bedtime gets earlier and earlier.
OK, I don't know. How should we play
this? So I've got six examples
that they've said.
Are we like, if you get
four or more, we're officially old.
If you're five, you're retired.
And if you get all six, put us
in the home.
The thing is, the like
logistics chat life brainstorm.
You've read these.
I don't know them.
Yeah, I'd go light on the consequences.
Yeah, that's what I'm thinking.
You're like, oh, and if we get six out of six,
we're both cool.
Yeah.
Well, don't worry about that, especially this first one.
Before I start though, you know how you do,
you know, I don't know if I like this,
but you know how people can find out, like say I'm 37 and you're what 31.
Yep.
But you do that like a metabolic test and it goes, Oh, your, your body's health is actually
34.
You know those things that they, yeah.
If I was my body's age, I'd be in retirement.
I'd be able to have a fucking day off.
Click my pension button and fucking go to the shops in a fancy hat.
You know what I'm saying?
I would be superannuation.
401k cash it in.
Oh fucking see you at bingo doll.
You know what I'm saying?
We can make a real mess of the bingo circuit in this town. Pass me my green see-through visor.
Yes.
Like, can you imagine when we're both there with the little dauber,
like, ink dauber things?
Yeah.
I've actually never been to bingo.
Should we go?
Yes.
Yes, we should.
Should we do like, tart bingo night or something?
Oh, we have played bingo.
We play in Patreon.
Oh, yeah.
I've never been to a big fancy one though, where you did the dog things.
I wonder if that one that I made for you, I just made on my iPad.
And I respect it. I wonder if they do the same.
At a restaurant.
Tom's got me the child's parmesan and I have my iPad and my headphones on.
What if we make our own bingo and go to bingo?
And one of them is the person running bingo says, who are you guys?
And we go, bingo!
You just really fucked stuff up. Doris starts having a panic attack.
Oh, I put that down.
Bingo again.
Some old bag has a heart attack on the table.
Someone sucks me over the toilet.
You walk back and you go, another one.
Thanks, Dolores.
Put those teeth back in now, sweetheart. Who's Dolores when she's at home? Anyway.
Okay. So that's the metabolic age. How old do you think you are? And we are like
Soul wise.
Spiritually.
I think I am an old soul.
Yeah. Like if I'm 37 and you're 31, I feel like given I am a bit older than you, I feel
like I'm about right.
Because I've really settled into getting close to 40.
The dad jokes are coming out.
I'm walking around with crap on my shirt.
I'm driving a Jimny.
Is it weird, though, that you went like 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, 40?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's why I've caught up.
Yeah. But I did definitely do what you just described.
Yeah. See, I think I was 20 year old until three years ago.
Nah, see, I think I went five, five, five, five, five, five, 35.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Like, I think I was a kid and then I was just like way too old for my age.
You have never been in your late 20s.
No. Well, you're just 20s.
No. Like I, my 19, 35.
Agreed. Like 1000%.
Anyway.
Older people didn't have the heating and insulation that modern houses have.
So it's very normal habit for the elderly to have a lap blanket while sitting on
the couch or a chair.
None from one. Is this normal or a chair? None from one?
Is this normal or nah?
What are we saying?
There's no other segments that sound like normal or nah.
Currently my hobby- Old or nah.
Oh, normal or old?
Currently I'm actually sitting on the couch,
not currently currently, but my current hobby
is sitting on the couch with a lap blanket while knitting a blanket
So that's fucking two from one
Early errands
If older people have errands to run they're all done before noon or not at all
Need to go to the shopping center for something? If the centre opens
at 9am you're walking out of there all done and finished by 10am. Yeah, old normal. Yeah. Both of us
literally the other day were like, how great would it be if you could get up and go for a swim and
then be at home for a coffee before 11am? We literally had this, about the Brighton Babers.
Brighton Babers. And we said how great would it be to be old and you just get everything that you need to get done
early in the morning.
If I have to go shopping on the weekend.
Oh, you got to get up and get early.
What time is it open?
Nine o'clock.
Oh, when you won't get parking otherwise.
And what then other people are walking into you
with their trolleys and such.
Fuck that.
And uncomfortable shoes.
Oh, fuck off!
Fuck off!
Shoes are for comfort and for working out the whole day.
If they look good, it's a bonus.
I don't relate to that one.
Going out for lunch is better than going out for dinner.
I've always said that.
I love lunch.
The elderly prefer lunch to dinner so they can get home at a reasonable hour.
They don't have an overly stuffed belly before bed.
Dinner before bed, yes.
They get home and put their comfy clothes on.
And during the evening, they can reminisce about how great lunch was.
You got something to say Charles? Does this sound familiar?
Someone spent time in an Airbnb with Tony recently.
I do prefer lunch. Same.
Do you know what I like about lunch as well is that sometimes you could have breakfast food still but sometimes you could have dinner food.
Like you go to lunch and you go, will I get the hollandaise or the spaghetti?
Like you go, well, I could have a pizza or I could have the big breakfast or...
At 12.15, everything's in play.
That's what I'm saying.
There's not a meal you can't have at 12.15.
I completely agree.
After three o'clock, you're taking the piss with a Benedict.
Yeah, you probably wouldn't have a big brekkie then. The other great thing about lunch is that sometimes when you do a lunch, then
like someone goes, oh, and it's only one or two o'clock.
Did you want a little coffee and cake after?
And doesn't that just fucking top your right off?
There's nothing better than having kick ons and still being home at 3pm.
Cake ons.
Cake ons.
Stretchy pants.
Elderly people won't buy any clothing that doesn't have a little bit of stretch.
Jeans without a bit of stretch make old people feel claustrophobic.
Agreed that things without stretch do make you feel a bit claustrophobic.
I have just changed though to a structured pant.
We were talking about this in the office the other day.
So I'm actually aging, oh, there's elastic in the back.
Okay, nevermind.
I was like, I'm aging backwards.
You know what?
I'm really-
But it's got to like, look at this, two things and a button.
The button wasn't done.
That's three things.
Look at that.
A button, a zipper and two clips.
Two clips, like that's fucking, that's a young's three things. Look at that. A button, a zipper and two clips. Two clips.
Like that's fucking, that's a young man's game.
Yeah.
I'm 16.
But is the thing in general just got a little bit of...
It does have a little bit of...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But also I'm not here to impress anyone.
Not here to impress anyone.
I gave up trying to impress people in my 40s and now I'm in my 60s.
I just don't give a fuck anymore.
So I've all I've come too early on that as well because they waited till their 40s.
I'm only 31.
Yeah.
I'll tell you what I'm a bit over.
I'm just an overachiever.
I'm hitting my milestones early like a baby.
Yeah.
And if a baby was hitting their milestones early you'd go wow what a wonderful child.
When does being advanced not be a compliment anymore?
That's a great fucking question. I don't know if I want to deal with the answer though. You know
what I mean? Like I don't want to think about that. All we have to worry about though is that we're
still in the territory of if one of us fell over, we fell over. I'm yet to take a fall. You haven't
had a fall. Here's what I'm over. And this has happened to me when we, I think when we went to Tazzy the other week.
You know, you go through the scanner at the airport and they go, oh, do you want to take
your belt off?
Yeah.
And I go.
Well, no, cause I don't do a belt, but sure.
Do you always have to take it off?
Yeah.
Cause the metal on the front will go off if you go to the front thing.
But do you know what is weird though? Like my glasses and stuff never,
and like, do you know what I mean?
That's got metal in it.
Yeah, well I had a pin in my shoulder
that went off a few times,
then after a while it just stopped going off.
I think that that's because the metal detectors got better.
Gotcha, so they know what's what.
Like so they go, oh we don't go off.
So hide your drugs in your pin shoulder,
is that what you're saying?
So they're like, we don't go off for like medical titanium,
but they would for like other shit,
but like jewelry and stuff.
Like, why does that not go off?
Mine doesn't go off cause I got the cheap stuff.
It doesn't beat for the plastic one that looks me.
Well like-
Your diamond should have set the whole airport up.
So, but I am wearing an elasticated pant.
So, but I am wearing an elasticated pant. I also have a dad stomach that will hold the pants up on their own.
You wear a belt though when you wear jeans, isn't it?
I've only just started.
Right.
Because I went for one run and lost a lot of weight.
But yeah, a belt for me, I'd love to need to have a belt.
Yeah, right.
But you know, these aren't required.
Carrying drugs.
The elderly are always carrying some ibuprofen,
agavascone, and an antihistamine with them at all times
because you never know when you might need it.
You've made that one up.
You've made that one up because you know
that in my bag at all times is all those three things.
And also my asthma buffer.
No, but I'm, no, that's both of us. at all times is all those three things. And also my asthma puffer.
No, but I'm, no, that's both of us. Cause I have a bottle of lens cleaner from my glasses. I have an antihistamine pretty much every day. And sometimes I forget and I come into the office and
I go, has anyone got a hizzy? Yeah. Well you used to, and now you just go, I know that little part
in your bag where it is, is okay if I grab one. But if you ever need one, I would lend you mine.
No, I know.
But I won't work.
Let's not lend.
Yeah.
Gavaskan is a bit more.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And finally, and this sort of, we've sort of touched on this one.
Yeah.
Early nights.
Let me just read the quote.
I don't like going out and partying late at night.
I want people to come to my house for a massive party and for them to all have left by 9pm.
Yeah.
Or to know that you could just sneak off and go to bed and they'll just figure it out.
So one time when I was doing breakfast radio, we had a big house party and I had been up
since 4am and I was like I am not gonna yeah but
everyone at the house was having a good time and they'll you know you get that
energy we go this they're here or not this is up one of the party yeah and I
was in a sheer house it wasn't like it was just my you know those other people
around and I was like well I'm just gonna duck off and go to bed yeah I got
a full eight hours sleep got up at like I went to bed at 8 p.m. got up at 4 a.m.
and they were still going.
But you've had a second wind so you look like a fucking hero.
I've had a full night's sleep, had a cold shower, got dressed again and then I was like,
let's fucking go and then it gets to seven o'clock and everyone's like,
geez Ryan's not fucking around and he's like, like I was just up the next day.
Yeah, you're like, no this is my morning.
Hi, it's Katherine from Pennsylvania and you're listening to Toni and Ryan.
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Let's talk about cream.
I love cream.
Are we talking like ice cream or like moisturiser?
Actually as a sensitive skin girl, I can do both.
I know you can do both.
And as much as we love ice cream, I'm currently talking about moisturiser.
I'm talking about Aveeno Baby Healthy Start, which for young
kids that you can use from day one.
You can use this Healthy Start balm
to help moisturise, nourish and comfort the skin of babies.
And when Mabel is older, I want you, Tony,
to remind her who moisturised her every night.
So when she's got beautiful skin,
you'd be like, yep, dad used to do that for you.
Well, I was about to say, you're doing a great job
because she high-fived me yesterday
when I came round for dinner,
and they were the softest hands I've ever felt.
You're welcome, Tony.
You're welcome, Mabel. Well, Well we love a routine and we know how
important good skin habits are to start early and with a Veno Baby Healthy Start
it's easy to moisturise and support baby skin moisture barrier from day one.
You can learn more at aveno.ca A massive shout out from old Tony and Ryan to all of our champion tapers over at our
Patreon.
All those young spring chickens.
Thanks for getting around.
All our little dolls online.
Karen Queen, good on you, Karen. Karen with a C. online. Karen Quinn, good on you Karen.
Karen with a C.
Okay.
Righto.
Chloe Turner, love you Chloe.
Victoria Donnelly, Tom Channing, Amanda Kelly,
and Megan Mills.
Absolutely love to see it.
All of those names I just read out
sound like they could be in a band together.
They, yeah.
Like, you were reading out like the top seven
for Australian I Idol or something.
Like it'd sound like Karen Quinn, Chloe Turner, Victoria Donnelly, Tom Cheney, Amanda Kelly
and Megan Mills.
You know like that feels like.
Now Charles, I know that you have torn interest because you work for Scott Tweedy and Australian
Idol.
And the grand final is tonight.
Oh, I hope Eilish wins.
Now I don't-
Is she silly?
I don't know. Watch the first episode. I don't- She's still in, I don't know. She is, that's who I want to watch. Watch the first episode.
I don't want to see anyone out of a job.
No.
But I was about to say, Charles, can you clip that out
and send it to the good folks at Australian Idol?
Cause I reckon Tonya did a pretty good job.
Do you think I could do it with Ricky Lee?
We'd know-
But host it, not like do it with-
No, well, I think your history with Ricky Lee,
I don't think she'd want to.
I think that'd be a bit of tension, a bit awkward.
No, I feel like-
Because Charles has passed on those messages.
She hasn't passed-
Did you?
And she hasn't passed anything back.
Did you tell her that I said hi?
It's been a very one way conversation.
Yeah, yeah, I told her.
What did she say back?
She just walked off.
Oh.
What a bitch.
I hope you're not lying because you wouldn't want people
to think badly of Ricky Lee.
Australia's Adele
No comment your honor
Wow we then hopped in the massage chair at idle do you guys have a mess up sure there as well
Do you have any podcasts have a fucking massage chair you've got a fucking good here, bro Oh, sorry. We had pants and massage chairs and I didn't.
Do you know how many podcasts have a fucking massage chair?
You've got a fucking good here, bro.
You are such an ungrateful little cicada.
Scratching those feet.
Yeah, biz off.
You squeaky bitch.
One of the things we're doing this year is celebrating ourselves and being smug about it. We're going to be a great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great,
great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great,
great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great,
great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great,
great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, A pleasure? It was a pleasure. It was a pleasure having Tony and Ryan stay at the house.
The house was left in great condition
and we'd welcome them back anytime.
Thank you so much.
Cause we'd love to revisit
because it was absolutely stunning.
I think I'm going to live in that Hobart Airbnb from now on.
So you know how like on Airbnb,
when you give a review, you have to like,
They won't let you get one.
Like you can't get one until you've given one.
The review I left for them was like incomparable.
Just like, I like it was so detailed and so fantastic.
Now I did forget one very important element though
about the review and I'm really sorry.
Is that, that it was the great,
the proximity to the Officeworks.
If you are running an Airbnb, we wanna know how far from the nearest office works.
And this one...
It was so close.
Just down the road.
Especially if you had a hire car, which we did,
because we were doing quite a bit of traveling about the countryside.
And we were also close to a Marta 10,
which is close to a hotel that Charles stayed in once.
So, I mean, really just the sights of Obart.
Incredible.
Now because Charles had to leave to go to Australian Idol
and Tony had to leave to see her French Bulldog,
I was left to sort of finish off the cleaning job
and not implying that you guys left a mess,
but it was tradition.
No, no, no.
No, traditionally I would. No, traditionally, I would.
Oh, traditionally Tony would do it.
I wouldn't be the one trusted
to make sure everything was right.
That's fucking weaponizing confidence.
Oh, well I fucking did it.
And here, read the review again.
No, I don't really do as good a job as you.
Why don't you just do it?
Read the review.
I also did a massive clean the day before we left.
So I can do that.
I was busy running. Put everything in the dishwasher.
I was busy running.
Oh.
This is an-
I would have loved to go running, but I couldn't.
The house is an absolute stye.
All I'm saying is, is that we did a great job
and the review reflects that.
As a team.
But I was nervous.
And I don't know if Charles knows about this.
I was nervous about the review
because I had to make some like editorial decisions
because I don't know if you know this Charles
and you listening, but I've got a bit of an irk about throwing away
food.
It's like wasting food that's still good just really gives me the heebie-jeebies.
And the result of that is the work fridge is full of leftover meals that have now gone
off because I won't throw them out at the time.
There's one in there that's literally growing your life.
Yeah, I know.
There's a few, what do you call them?
It looks like a rainy day. It's like cloudy your life. Yeah, I know. There's a few, what do you call them? It looks like a rainy day.
It's like cloudy in there.
It's like created its own Theo Germel fucking.
It's its own weather.
Yeah.
And that's because...
Theo Germel.
You know, I went with it.
And that's because I'm like, no, no, I just, for whatever reason, it's just like a fucking
in my brain, throwing out food and drink just really annoys me.
Nah, and I get it.
And when we got there...
To my own detriment, yeah.
But like when we got there, we were like,
we'll get a couple of things to keep us going over the time.
So we had a few bit of stuff left in the Airbnb.
And I was in an Airbnb over the weekend as well.
We were down at the Great Ocean Road with Mabel and Bridge.
Yeah.
And so basically, this is the game of, is leaving this behind like a nice gift for the next
guest or is it just leaving rubbish?
And these were the things and again didn't want to throw anything in the bin.
And I was like, oh, maybe it'd be nice to.
Someone might like that half a chicken sandwich.
Then you go, well, no.
Okay.
Oh, fuck.
Did you leave the.
Yeah.
Well, yeah, we got, okay.
Shut up, Charles. Let's start on the Yeah. Well, yeah, we got, okay.
Shut up, Charles.
Let's start on the weekend I decided to go to Ocean Road.
The place has the coffee machine in the house.
So on Saturday morning, went to a little market and just got like a little bag of beans because
like coffee beans.
They didn't leave any beans or pods or anything?
There wasn't much.
It was probably enough for like a coffee. Oh.
Or to be very fair,
maybe there was some in the cupboard and I didn't say.
You know what I'm saying?
So true.
I'm not gonna at the house.
Yeah.
But that would be something that they should do.
But so, cause a couple of coffees were on holidays
weekend away.
Yeah.
Hey, you don't have to justify that.
I drink eight coffees on a weekend away.
Yeah.
Per day. I reckon we used half the bag. Yeah. Hey, you don't have to justify that. I drink eight coffees on a week in a way. Yeah. So I reckon we use half the bag. Yeah. So there's probably six, seven coffees left.
I think it's nice to leave half a bag. Of coffee beans.
Like if I went somewhere and there was half a bag there, I'd be like, fuck yeah.
How nice of them. What about the coffee?
I'd be like, fuck yeah. How nice of them.
What about the coffee?
Nah, but like half a bag.
I mean, you couldn't be happy with that.
Half a bag's half a bag.
I also think that something like coffee, you open the cupboard
and you go, great.
It's the same as someone who's left behind a tomato sauce.
You're never mad that someone's left behind a tomato sauce.
OK, so do you remember you guys got the Mr. Black espresso cans?
The little espresso martini.
Espresso martini, you shake it up, you pour it over rice, delicious.
Although Tony learnt the hard way not to have one at 7pm when you're planning an early night
because she was up all night.
I actually, like the old people in the story from before, had a coffee and I was up till like 2am.
But do we all agree, and I did leave these, that that's like a nice thing to leave in
the fridge?
If I walked in and there was an espresso martini there, I'd be like, oh, classy!
And there was two, so it wasn't just like one?
So yeah, actually, that's a really good point.
I think that the amount makes a difference.
Yeah, and that's a very interesting point considering the next one.
No, I didn't. No, Charles is actually, I didn't even consider the quantity.
I thought you were about to say you had one at like six am in the morning.
Yeah.
And there's only one.
No, I just had half of one mine.
I had remaining from the few drinky do's that we had a single Jim Beam and Cola can.
Rubbish.
Is that rubbish?
Gift or rubbish? Rubbish.
It was zero sugar.
Is that can?
Worse!
God, they couldn't even leave me a full fat one.
I left that and I left it behind the espresso ones because I knew the cleaner probably
chucks that out they probably drank it one one cube of duck River butter I
think butter in the fridge is the fridge I think is very nice yeah and you're
saying cube but it was like a full
foil thing that hadn't been touched. Untouched. What about the tub that had been touched? I threw
that out. Yeah I think you have to. Because it's a tub and yeah Tosin you've covered etc.
Uh Tony bought a six pack of fruit tingle lollipops and there were two left in the box. What? What's a fruit
tingle lollipop? What were those like? Icy pole things you had. Oh! So I heard lollipop
like a chopper chop. I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? I hope I didn't get
the chopper chop. Yeah. No, like a lollipop flavored icy pole. So there's a six pack,
but there's two left in the box. Yeah. All the magnums are gone, I guess.
You eat all those.
Well, there was one magnum left
and I thought it's weird to leave one.
Yeah.
I better take that one on.
And I did that morning.
Yeah.
And because heaven forbid a couple turn up
and have a brawl about-
One magnum.
Who's having the magnum.
Yeah.
Or they've got kids and then the kids go,
there's one who's gonna get it.
Yeah.
So I had to take care of it.
Yeah, no, that's fair.
But the two icy poles.
I'd probably throw the icy poles out.
No, I would leave them.
Like, it's a freezer.
So true.
Like, even if someone doesn't have it next time,
it can stay there for six months.
Very true.
I threw those out.
I probably would have thrown those out.
You know what?
I wouldn't have thrown them out.
I would have, like, put them in the sink
and, like, melted them down. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. So that it wasn't like a sack of sordid. If I hadn't have thrown them out. I would have like put them in the sink and like melted them down
That's nice. Yeah, if I had that it wasn't like a
No, so it wasn't like a sack of cordial in the bin. Yeah, I put in the neighbors bin. I went further down the hill
And I kept parking our fucking spots over my and finally an unopened tub of hummus
Where did that go into that was the Airbnb that I was just about. Oh, with Bridget.
I was like, nah, I'd cop a homie.
Oh, but.
No one's ever said that.
I'll say that tonight.
No, I would because I would be like, because this Airbnb you were in with Bridget and
Mavs on the weekend, beautiful.
Do you know what I call that?
Three, two, one, charcuterie house.
And I would walk in there with some
Crackies and maybe a little saloon
and I would go, nummy, nummy, nummy,
Homie in the fridge.
Okay, so Tony's turning up for half a bag
and a Crackie of Homie.
And, um, what do you call it?
A tub of Homie.
You said Crackie of something.
Like, some Crackiesies like a cracker.
Yeah, some crackies and a half bag.
Come on down to the Airbnb.
We'll give you the address if you know the code word.
Five stars.
What do you love to see, Jenny?
I just sent you a little link.
Jay sent this through on Patreon.
And it's so cute.
They said the Japanese ambassador to the UK has been doing some really sweet things
lately. So people have been saying he's like Paddington Bear. And then he posted this carousel
on Instagram. I've just sent it to you and we'll pop it in the episode's thread or whatever.
But so yeah, the Japanese ambassador to the UK took Paddington Bear on a trip to Japan.
And it's all of these pictures of Paddington in Japan.
And the tweets are like,
oh, we found some Japanese fish and chips.
Looks delicious.
Like the-
He's really committed to the bit.
It's so cute.
All of the photos and all of the little captions
are fucking adorable.
Like-
Oh, which one to buy?
Yeah, he took Paddington to the Ghibli museum.
Like it is just so adorable.
And actually, I'm not ashamed to say this whatsoever,
but a few people sent me through and said like,
oh my God, what a crossover for Tony,
because you love Paddington and you've been to Japan.
That's good gear.
But I just thought that-
Look at the top comment.
Oh, hang on, let me open it again.
What is it? The top comment. Oh, hang on. Let me open it again. What is it?
The top comment is from Paddington Bear saying,
adventures are always better with friends.
I did say that.
What a Paddington thing to say.
Maybe we should take photos like this when we go traveling with Charles.
That is comedy from you.
That's very, very funny.
Sorry, Charles.
I pose with Charles like this.
Found some fish of chips.
Which one should we buy, Charles?
But I just thought that was so sweet. I love to see that.
My love to see it's been sent through by Tapa Abbey.
Hi, Tapa Abbey.
My partner loves to make up bedtime stories for our
two boys. He doesn't get to do bedtime much throughout the week with work but on his days
off he spends an hour coming up with great stories and saying hey boys what character do you want to
hear tonight? Like what should they do? And then he takes the intel and makes a story. He loves it
and he started making youtube videos of his stories with some like little bits of animation and stuff and
For people that want to share his stories with their kids. They can go and watch it. That is so sweet
So if anyone is interested the YouTube is called the Storyteller Fella
And that is a great name literally just started and when I clicked on it it had four subscribers
a great name. It literally just started and when I clicked on it, it had four subscribers.
Now it has five. And it has five because the Tony and Ryan channel are now following and I commented back to Abby and said when he has a million followers you remember who was number
five because it was us because isn't it better with friends and Charles. Love you. Thank you.
Love that. The only thing that could make this day better is a full tub of homie.
Wish he'd brought it from their bed.
Cracker homie for the folks.
Cracker homie for our friends.
I love to see that.
Okay.
Tomorrow we've got confessions.
Oh, see, it's beautiful.
And then we say we're going to talk about someone shitting themselves at work.
Well, okay.
So yeah, Charles has got a story.
Yeah. Well, okay, so yeah, Charles has got a story. Yeah, now we've got a confession and we've heard lots of different variations of this
same confession before.
However, it's the final sentence that really flips it on its head.
Yeah, but this story can break dance.
That's all I'll say.
I don't know what the story is.
All right, see you tomorrow. Goodbye. can break dance. That's all I'll say. I don't know what the story is.
All right, chat to you tomorrow.
Good bye.
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