Toni and Ryan - SUPdate
Episode Date: January 19, 2023The day we've ALLLLL been waiting for! But is it good news? And Ryan looks like a fuckhead (lol) love ya! Toni xo [USED TO BE VIDEO EPISODE BUT NOT ANYMORE LOL TECHNICAL CHAT] Check out our Patreon at... patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Welcome to the podcast. Hi. My name is Ryan. This is Tony. Welcome. Now, cards on the table. Oh.
I think I stuffed up the times of this approval previously, and I think now is the like
rescheduled time, but I'm just putting it straight out there. I could be wrong.
In your defense, there has been people that have gone, yeah, we'll do it on Wednesday,
but Wednesday for them is like Thursday for us. So there's, you know, time zones are tricky.
Okay, this person's in our time zone.
Okay.
All right.
Defense deflated.
This is Christy, and fingers crossed.
Hello?
Christy, this is Ryan from the Tony and Ryan podcast,
and I just want to ask, after all the times I've screwed you around,
have I called at the right time?
You sure have.
Yes!
Fucking thank God.
What a relief.
What a relief.
What a relief.
And the second question, Tony?
Would you like to approve this podcast?
Of course.
Do you guys anything?
Yes.
I mean, she's fucking rescheduled that many times.
I was expecting her to go, you know, not now.
I was prepared to do it the first 12 times.
But now we're in.
We're in.
No, no.
Hi, Christy from the best capital of Australia,
and I approve this podcast.
Welcome to the video show.
Just a reminder, on Fridays you can also watch the show in the Spotify app or use it on your smart TV as well as just listen to it.
And coming up today, I was trying to be smart and embarrass Tony.
You might actually not know how this came about.
I was trying to, like, make a joke at your expense.
At my expense?
And it backfired spectacularly.
What?
Why would you try and make a joke at my expense?
Well, to you, with you.
Like, we were just, like, ribbing each other.
Like, what?
Yeah.
And it couldn't have gone worse.
You saw the outcome, but I don't know if you know what led to it.
Oh, my God.
Amazing.
That's coming up soon.
But first, the moment we've all been waiting for.
So very quickly, just before we get into this update, I'll just give everyone a bit of a recap.
So last week, last Friday, I asked you whether I should buy a stand-up paddleboard, an inflatable
stand-up paddleboard. You gave your honest feedback. Was it good feedback?
Yeah, it was, I think.
And you said maybe instead of buying one, go and do a few classes,
see if you like it, see if you're any good at it,
before you, like, commit to buying one.
Because you don't like not being good at stuff.
Well, no one likes not being good.
But you're not a, oh, if I go back 15 times, you'll be like, hmm.
I'll maybe give it twice.
Maybe.
Maybe.
And that's a fucking portion.
Well, the first time you went to the beach with Pippa, six minutes?
Yep.
And then she shut my car.
This isn't working.
We're out.
No, but that was so that she didn't feel pressured. Because I don't want her to feel.
I'm a lovely listening mother.
So I don't want her to ever feel pressured.
Because I didn't want her to be like.
You know when you push someone
until you hate something? You're a person
that will make a snap decision that
this isn't the right thing. I just
don't believe in pushing
something that's not right. Okay. So that's why
I was like, maybe get a few lessons. Don't push
something onto yourself if it's not for you.
But then you revealed...
That I'd already bought it. But
honestly, I said this at the end of yesterday's episode,
everyone online, everybody in my messages, in the Facebook group,
has been so supportive of me and the Stand Up Paddleboard.
People were like, it's actually really easy.
And even if you just like paddle around on your bum, it's still fun.
You're still in the ocean.
You're still like getting out there, seeing Australia, you know,
like it's still fun.
Anyway, so I made a promise that I have to use it six times
in two months because the lessons are about $50 each.
I paid $300 for the paddleboard.
If I use it six times in two months, I get to keep it.
If not, I have to, I think you want it.
I think I promised it to someone.
Yeah, Franco, our video guy. Yeah. Yeah. And then. But yeah, Franco and I are think you want it. Yeah, I think I promised it to someone. Yeah, Franco, our video guy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then.
But, yeah, Franco and I are looking forward to it.
Yeah, great.
So last Friday I said the first time I was going to go was on Sunday
with my friend Bree.
So she brought one at the same time as me and she's got a couple
of girlfriends that she's gone with once.
So she's thought of new as well.
So she's brand new.
She went once, borrowed a board, and then bought one.
So she's still ahead of me because she's been once.
And you and I were in Sydney.
I got back on the Saturday, and the weather was insane in Melbourne.
I know you weren't here, but it was about 38 degrees.
It was so fucking hot.
That's about 98 degrees Fahrenheit for anyone in America.
Yeah, right.
So that's fucking hot.
That's fucking hot.
Like Torbs and I went out for dinner and we were drenched in sweat
by the time we like got out of the Uber.
Like my bra was like ringing.
So I was like, fuck, it's going to be such,
like it's going to be awesome going out on the water tomorrow.
So, you know, I set up all my stuff in the kitchen so that in the morning I could, like, set my alarm really early.
Oh, so you set your, it's like setting clothes up the night
before the first day of school.
Yeah, well, I do that every night anyway.
Really?
For work and stuff.
Yeah, I always set my clothes up the night before.
I think it's an old habit from doing breakfast radio.
Yeah, it really starts.
Then in the morning there's just, just like nothing you need to think about.
But so I never eat breakfast.
I woke up.
I made some Vegemite toast.
I had a coffee.
Get some carbs, get some protein.
Yeah, exactly right.
I had a shower, brushed my teeth, like slathered myself in sunscreen
because of how hot it was the day before.
And I also did get a little bit burnt when we were in Sydney on my chest
and I was like, oh, not going to risk that happening again.
So I'm like, I'm so fucking pumped.
Everything is organized.
And I was like, I'll pick up my girlfriend Bree on the way there.
So we were going to go to Black Rock, which is about like in traffic,
like an hour from my house.
And Bree lives about halfway down.
So to meet all of them at 8.30, I was like, cool,
I'll leave my house around 7.30, get to Breeze at 8,
and then we'll be there for 8.30.
Easy.
Easy.
The girls also added me to their group chat.
Ooh, is that just like a big occasion on itself?
Yeah.
And the group chat is called The Paddle Club.
I like that.
Like The Saddle Club.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was probably better before you had to explain. club. I like that. Like the saddle club. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was probably better before you had to explain.
Okay.
Yeah.
Take that out.
How does it feel to be a part of the paddle club?
Well, it was really nice because I was like, girl gang, girl gang, girl gang.
Yeah.
You know, like, and I'm just like so pumped that I just fucking was doing it.
Yeah.
You know, and they're like really excited and they've obviously got their own boards and they've gone a few times.
Is there some emojis the night before like, oh, fucking thumbs up,
weather's looking good, is there a bit of like vibe and a bit of momentum?
Yeah, everyone's pumped.
Like everyone's really pumped up.
So anyway, I'm genuinely really excited.
I've fucking like brushed all my teeth and everything,
slathered myself in sunscreen.
Yep.
I put my SUP backpack on so it's got like a backpack with all the shit in it and
pick up all my stuff and i actually got torbs to take a photo of me so that you could see it looks
is that the one i saw on the story no so that was when i un like unboxed it okay so this is me
like with my towel and my bag and everything looks so excited yeah and then i'll just scroll down
there's some photos of like me in the lift. I was just so fucking pumped.
I'm glad you're documenting the day.
I knew that you wouldn't believe me if I didn't show you some photos.
Yeah, facts.
Anyway, so I jump in the lift and Brie starts calling me.
My phone starts ringing.
What's going on?
She goes, we have to cancel today.
What?
The conditions are really bad.
I'm going to show you a screenshot of the paddle club.
The group chat's going off.
Yeah.
This is like, yeah, this is the conditions. Do you call them white caps, white heads?
Like, yeah, a bit rough.
Yeah, it's super choppy.
Hey, guys, I think we call it.
Sorry, it's not good out there today.
So it was just way too dangerous for us to go out there.
I mean, you've had some highs and lows in your life.
How heartbroken were you at this stage?
I walked back into our apartment.
Yeah.
Tubbs was up, obviously.
I got off the phone.
I was like, oh, my God, yeah, totally get it.
Like, obviously it's unsafe.
I got off the phone, sat on the couch, and I just started to cry.
Yeah.
I was heartbroken.
I feel sad now thinking about it.
I'm not actually even being a dick.
I never in my life have been upset that someone's cancelled plans.
Thank God for that.
If you did get upset by that often, we probably wouldn't be mates.
But normally if someone cancels plans, you go, oh, great,
well, I'll just fucking, I'll sit on the couch tonight,
won't go up to dinner.
Great, got out of that one.
Yeah.
I was genuinely upset and Torbs looked at me and he was like,
you actually really wanted to go?
Because I don't know if up until that point he knew, like,
whether I was just kind of hamming it up or not.
Yeah.
But he looked at me and he went, you actually,
you genuinely wanted to go.
And I was like, yeah.
And then.
Is it sad or cute that I got up on Sunday morning
and checked the weather?
So you knew that the weather was bad?
I just knew.
But I just, I cared.
That's really nice. Well, I didn't know that it was bad? I just knew. But I just, I cared. That's really nice.
Well, I didn't know that it was bad enough to not go,
but I was just like, it was just in my mind.
That's really sweet.
Yeah.
So.
So what, is it later in the day?
Have you been, have you?
So it's very, very emotional.
I was very emotional, right?
And you want to hear the saddest thing ever?
Yeah.
I had to go and have a shower and wash all the sunscreen off.
Isn't that the most depressing thing ever. I had to go and have a shower and wash all the sunscreen off. So sad.
Isn't that the most depressing thing you've ever heard?
It's like a girl getting stood up for the prom
and having to take the dress off.
Like, kill me.
That is so sad.
It was the fucking most depressing.
I cried in the shower.
Like, it was awful.
How many times did you cry?
I was just so fucking upset.
I teared up probably three times, three separate times.
You got off the phone and was like, oh, it's totally fine.
Yeah, and I was like, oh, guys, I fucking get it.
Like, you know, these things happen, whatever.
And then I cried.
And then Torbs, like, did not leave my side for probably two hours
because he felt really bad.
Yeah.
And because there was no alternative.
It's not as if it was like, oh, I won't go with them, but I'll go.
Like, the weather was fucked.
And so then I actually saw that there was a comment online.
It was like, if I know one thing about Tony,
it's that she fucking hates admin.
Yeah.
And you're choosing like an activity that actually requires
quite a bit of admin.
That is true because you do.
This isn't like a once in a century storm.
It's like there's conditions have to be right and they're often not.
Yeah.
So if you go out there or get to the beach or check the webcams
or whatever and you go, oh.
Not today.
You can't go.
Like, that's it.
Like, it's just it is what it is.
I never really thought about that.
Me either.
So I'm like, yep, I'll easily be able to go four times in six months
or whatever I fucking said.
Four times in two months.
Six times in two months.
Whatever.
Six times in two months.
Fuck.
Thank you.
Lucky we've got a producer.
And I was just like, of course that's going to be easy,
but I guess the reality of a hobby that relies on so many
like outside factors, that's like it fucking,
it just is what it is.
So there's, okay, there's seven days in a week,
but there might only be two or three that you're available to go.
And then of those two or three, you're available to go. Yeah.
And then of those two or three, you have to hope that they're the days
where the conditions are perfect and it's not raining in the winter.
It just needs to be still, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so there's been a few times this week where we've gone,
set that morning aside, set that night aside,
and then it's gotten to that day and we've been like, no, no good.
Or like some of the other girls haven't been able to go or whatever.
So it's like, so today we actually are supposed to be going tonight.
Like we've got like.
Like a sunset paddle.
Yeah.
So hopefully, fingers crossed, the weather is good and we're going
to meet up at like 6 o'clock or something.
So you're telling me this is update.
It was honestly, it was so heartbreaking and it was really hard.
I'm heartbroken for you.
Because like obviously you're my mate, right?
I wanted to tell you how upset I was.
Like I wanted to be like, fuck, I'm so gutted.
Like I couldn't go and do this thing.
I've got a question.
Question.
Does this mean that the shuckers you've been dropping have been
inauthentic shuckers?
Okay, how dare you?
No.
Because you have implied through the shuckers and a few sexy winks,
not that it went well, but at least that you'd been.
I haven't been yet.
But I'm still really optimistic about the whole thing.
I think you'll enjoy it.
Whenever it is that you get out there, you're going to love it.
But are you starting to do the maths on the six times in three months
and getting a bit nervous?
Time's fucking running out.
Or are you a bit like, oh, if I go a few times, it is what it is,
but it's probably not going to be my thing?
Oh, like I hear what you're saying. I don't know if it'll be my thing? Oh, like I hear what you're saying.
I don't know if it'll be my thing, but like I'm still going to try
and put effort in.
Yep.
And now that I'm in this group chat, I feel like we're all friends.
So it's like if they were ever going to go out,
I'd obviously just go with them if I was available.
But it's one of those things where, I don't know,
I'm really upset that it's like it's taken the those things where, I don't know.
I'm really upset that it's like it's taken the wind out of my sails a bit.
No pun intended.
No pun intended.
I don't know if this is a story for another day, but I got invited to go to the movies with these guys once
and they had a group chat.
What guys?
Sort of like friends of friends.
Sure.
Like I know some of them and i've
met them all like once at a part at a party and now it was some random movie that was a bit obscure
that i really wanted to watch and one of them was like oh me and bloody the guys are going on next
week or whatever and i didn't end up going shock horror but like I'm still in their group chat from when we were organising that movie.
So they added you in and then?
Because they're like, yeah, yeah, and we'll do it.
Because you can book the seats now.
Yeah, make sure you book row 17 and we'll get put.
Oh, did you guys want to meet here for a beer first?
And I was like, oh, this is great.
And then I'm sort of out of the group.
I don't really know them anymore.
But, like, I still get a, like, look at my phone and go, oh,
the guys are going to see a movie again.
That's nice.
Why don't you just leave the group chat? I don't want it to say Ryan's left the group because then they'll go, oh, the guys are going to see a movie again. That's nice. Why don't you just leave the group chat?
I don't want it to say Ryan's left the group because then they'll go,
oh, has he been here the whole time?
Yeah, it's like it's too late now to.
But I kind of like the camaraderie even though I'm not in it.
So I guess my question is even if it doesn't work out,
do you just like being in the paddle club group chat?
I do really like it.
Paddle club's great.
No, it's like the saddle club.
Yeah, that's good. I do. I do really like it. Paddle Club's great. No, it's like the Saddle Club. Yeah.
That's good.
I like that.
Watch this space.
Another sub date on the way.
Yeah, another sub date.
And I will continue to provide sub dates.
Please.
Either through here or through Instagram.
Yep.
Everyone will be across the supping well and truly.
But, yeah, so I'm really fucking hoping that we end up getting to go tonight.
Yeah. But it yeah, so I'm really fucking hoping that we end up getting to go tonight. Yeah.
But it is what it is.
But I'm just, you know, like conditions don't affect watching TV on the couch,
so I've just never been knocked back by the weather.
All right, well, up next, because I feel like, you know,
you've had a broken heart.
Yeah, if you could lift my spirits, that would be awesome. If there's one thing that makes you feel good is when I look
like a fucking idiot.
I do love that.
Also, not weather dependent.
Not weather dependent.
That can happen any time.
I can be a fuck at any time.
Right now, a little shy.
All right, that's up next.
Hi, Christy calling from Rockhampton,
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.
A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon.
You can find all of the info in the show notes of our podcast.
Tina Coos.
Thank you very much, Tina.
Thank you, Tina Coos. Fucking love to see it.
SGM. Thank you. Some good mate of ours. Thankos. Thank you very much, Tina. Fucking love to see it. SGM.
Thank you. Some good mate of ours.
Thank you.
Kevin Bolson. Fucking love to see it. Thank you.
Kevin Corbett. Oh, Kevin Day.
What? Kevin Day.
Oh, two Kevins.
Oh. What?
Please continue. What did you think I said? I was thinking about
like Cal Day and Cal
Night from... Cath Day and Cal Night.
Cath Day and Cal Night.
Whatever.
What?
Well, they're Kevin.
Yeah.
Jens and Axilla.
Thanks, Jens.
And Bailey McGrath.
Thank you so much.
Thank you, Bailey.
Wow.
Good day for us today.
Good day for us today.
Tomorrow, Hot Fun Garbage.
Hot Fun Garbage. St Kilda Beach in Melbourne from 10am till midday.
If you've got some clothes you want to get out of your life,
come and throw them in the hot fun garbage truck.
If you don't have anything you want to get rid of, come say hi.
Totally fine.
Come say hi.
Enjoy some ice cream.
Got some ice cream.
Got some coffee.
Tony has made and named her own ice cream flavours.
There's three.
They're very good.
They're very good.
Yeah, but we'll fucking see you tomorrow.
Yeah, it's going to be sick.
Now, fuck. I was going to be sick. Now, fuck.
I was trying to be clever.
Yep.
I was trying to be smart.
It has backfired spectacularly.
And whilst I was trying to embarrass Tony Lodge,
it turns out I, Ryan, ended up being the dickhead.
Let me set the scene for you at an airport.
Oh. We're boarding the plane. High set the scene for you at an airport. We're boarding the plane.
High stakes time at an airport.
It doesn't matter flying domestic, international,
even if you're just dropping someone off,
I feel like the second you think about an airport,
like you're arsehole titans.
That makes one of us.
But I've seen firsthand Tony's arsehole titan.
So we're boarding the plane.
Tony is at the front of the economy line.
I am at the back.
I'm at the back of the economy line.
Fuck nothing humbles you like walking through first class, eh?
Well, we know the type of plane has, what, four rows of business class?
Yeah, so like six seats.
Yeah, like 10, 16 seats max business class yeah so like six seats yeah like 10 16 seats max business class
and the other 100 is all us peasants in economy yeah but for some reason despite there only being
16 business class seats there is 50 people in the business class line i reckon upwards of 50
more than half there was everyone was in that. So usually it's like, yeah, business here, bang, bang, bang, cool,
and everyone else come on through.
Yeah.
But everyone, even though we're all going on the same plane,
we're all going to the same place.
It's like, oh, I'll fucking just go through this line and blah, blah, blah.
And you just, like, I get it because I am an anxious traveller.
Yeah.
I'm getting a lot better actually because I've never travelled as much
as I have since, like, we've had to go to Sydney the last few times. And I feel like I'm getting a lot better actually because I've never travelled as much as I have since we've had to go to Sydney the last few times
and I feel like I'm getting better.
But as an anxious traveller, I get it.
You want to get in, you want to get sorted, you want to get in your seat,
you want to know that you're on.
Because once you're on there, you're on and you're fine.
Yeah.
So I do get that.
But like fucking standing in the other line, it's not like they're not going to not let you.
If you're in the line, you're in the line.
Yeah.
Doesn't matter what side you're on.
I think when you're in the line, you're safe.
Yeah, sure.
Because you're in.
You're in.
That's a good point, actually.
Even though you have shown some sort of empathy towards these people,
we were texting each other, being funny, being like,
who the fuck do these people think they are?
Well, how are 100 people going to sit in three seats at the front?
Yeah, see, this is the Tony I was expecting.
You know?
I wasn't getting the, oh, I get it.
I was getting the, who the fuck do they think they are?
Is 100 of you going to fit in the first three rows?
Because literally they say business class passengers and priority.
So you expect like maybe get 10 people and then people with kids
or like elderly people that need some assistance.
They are who they call up first.
That's it.
So because Tony and I.
Then the other fuckheads get on.
Yeah, that's us.
Including us.
Yeah.
So Tony, front of the line, I'm at the back line,
and we're just texting each other about these dickheads
and we're just talking shit and being idiots because we're 12 years old.
Yeah.
And just to avoid any confusion about me being at the front of the line
and Ryan being at the back, we don't go to the airport together.
We don't live near each other anymore.
No, but we don't go to the airport together
because I like to get there with time.
Yep.
And Ryan's like, cool, I'll maybe get a magazine,
go to the bathroom 20 times.
Like you're a stroller through the airport.
I just like to – I'd rather get there, sit at the gate,
and wait for the gate.
For five hours, yeah.
Even the first time when we used to live really close to each other,
you were like, do you mind if we go to the airport separate?
Or even if we got to the airport together, you'd go, oh,
I might just like go to, and I'd be like, cool, I'll see you on the plane.
Yeah.
Like I just walk to the gate myself.
Like I just take that out of the equation.
So your boarding pass was on your phone, like a QR code,
like pretty much everyone these days.
Yeah.
And we were texting each other and I realised that because we're texting,
if I texted you, did your hair just fall out?
Your bun just fell out?
Yes!
Mid-video show?
Oh, my God!
Did people see that?
So Tony had a hair in a bun and it just fell out.
No, the hair lucky popped off.
Oh, Cam, thank you.
Oh, lucky Cam's here.
Where did it pop out to?
I don't know.
Oh, my God.
That was intense, wasn't it?
That was full on.
From my angle, it was just like your hair fell off.
It literally, I heard it go like, oh, my God, put those off Amazon.
I won't do that again.
So you're at the front of the line and we're texting each other.
I'm like, oh, when you go to scan your QR code,
if I text you right at that second, my text is going to pop up on the screen.
Yeah.
Because you know how they like sort of, they don't grab your phone,
but they kind of guide you to put your phone into the little scanner thing.
Yeah.
And so I was like, oh, I'll send like something a bit dirty
so it'll pop up on the screen and the flight attendant will see it.
Oh, right.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
So then you pop up on the screen and this thing pops up
and she'll be like, oh, what's going on here?
So I'm busy texting.
How old are you?
Yeah, I know.
So I text.
Did you even see?
You didn't even respond to it.
To be honest, if you sent me, this sounds really bad,
but if you sent me something fucked or something really dirty,
like I literally, I wouldn't even think twice.
So I sent to you, I've got a cushion you can sit on.
And then in the next message I was like,
and cushion is code word for my team.
Yeah.
Oh, I literally thought nothing of that when I saw that.
But I was trying to get the timing right.
Yeah.
Oh, I literally thought nothing of that when I saw that. But I was trying to get the timing right so when they scanned it,
you would pop up and the person would go, oh.
And then I saw you walk straight through and I was like, oh, fuck,
I must have got the timing wrong, blah, blah, blah, blah.
So I'm just trying to make you look like just because we're texting
each other.
Yeah, so it's just a bit of fun.
Whilst I'm concentrating on texting you, I've walked past the sign that says if you're in each other. Yeah, so it's just a bit of fun. Whilst I'm concentrating on texting you,
I've walked past the sign that says if you're in rows 20 and beyond,
you have to board through the back door.
If you're rows 1 to 20, you go through the front door.
On the arrow bridge like across, yeah.
And so because I was busy doing this, I missed that.
And so I walk and I'm sitting in the second back row,
which happens to be where you're sitting.
We're in row 28.
Yeah, it's 30 rows.
We're in row 28.
And so I get in the front door and everyone,
so it must have been everyone from row 15 to 30 has gone in the back
and is walking forwards, like up.
And then I've got on and Tony's looked at me and gone,
oh, are you fine?
First time you got up the front of something. And then I've got on and Tony's looked at me and gone, oh, are you fine? First hour, are you up the front or something?
And I was like just shaking my head.
And then you've realised, oh, you fuckhead,
you've gone on the wrong door.
I've walked in and gone, was there a back door?
Why are people coming up?
Was there a back door?
And then you saw all the people on the tarmac outside the window.
I looked out the window, saw the little step thing
and people walking.
I was like, oh.
And you were the arsehole that everyone was scooching past.
You go, sorry.
Yeah.
Sorry.
And you've got your fucking backpack and a carry-on.
Yeah, because I was like, I don't want to put my bag.
So I've got all my shit.
And it's just that plane where it's like a single walkway down the middle
and everyone's walking up and I had to the whole time go,
oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
And you're sucking it in, trying to get past everybody.
Yeah, I'm trying to suck it in.
But the duffel bag's not helping.
At one stage, because I had the duffel bag, I tried to swing around to let someone through,
but the back of the thing slapped someone in the face.
And so I sat in row 28.
I reckon my backpack was in row 7.
My duffel bag was in row 11.
So you were just ditching your stuff as you were going down. Because they were like,
it's pretty full down the back. And we were
looking for space and whatever. Oh my
God. And by the time I got to the
back, I was sitting there.
Actually, poor girl. There's a
random girl I had to sit in between Tony and I.
Tony likes the window. I like the aisle. There's other girls in the middle.
And I rocked up and went, guess
who chose the wrong door?
And this girl is horrified because she's like, who the fuck are you?
She doesn't know that we know each other.
And Tony goes, I'm guessing it was you.
And then the other girl's like, right?
Yeah, she just joined in because she thought that you were just
a friendly guy that talks to people on a plane,
which is so embarrassing.
I'm playing, which is so embarrassing.
I imagine a person who doesn't know anyone walking in,
I guess who chose the wrong door, am I right?
Oh, what a goof.
And this girl's just like, yeah.
And I tried to lean over and be like,
this wouldn't have happened if I didn't send you the cushion penis joke.
And you're like, had your headphones on, and you're like, what?
And I'm like, it actually doesn't matter. And then the girl's like, you sent that to me.
What?
I'm married.
Oh, fuck, that is so funny.
So obviously I knew that you looked like a fuckhead getting in the wrong door,
but I didn't realise that there was obviously a whole lead up to,
fuck, that's good.
Well, that's why I missed the door.
Fuck, that's good.
Yeah.
And you know what made it even worse?
That has made me feel better.
Thank you.
Well, and you already know this story, but my seat was a bit dodgy.
And when I leant back, my body weight just like pushed the seat.
It wouldn't stay upright on its own.
Just like slowly easing back.
Slowly easing back.
And so the flight attendant was like, excuse me, sir,
before takeoff you can't put your seat back.
And I was like, I haven't put, oh.
So you got ready to light her up and be like I haven't no
I was just like I know that he's like yeah everyone knows that so you can't put your seat
back and I was like yeah why is my seat back and then I went for and so I had to like use my abs
like hold my person up abs oh no but it's in like core what there's abs under there yeah
like if I leant back on the chair the chair would just fall back So I just had to sit there stiff and not put any pressure on.
And that's hard for you because you fall asleep before we take off.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yep.
Oh, what a great day.
What a great day.
Have you got a love to see it?
Pick me up.
My love to see it is this series of photos of Pippa smiling.
No.
I mean, yes.
That is fucking cute.
So she's smiling.
Yeah, I mean.
Look at that huge, goofy smile face.
I don't think I've seen her with a big grin like that before.
Yeah.
What's she smiling at?
Isn't it cute?
What is she smiling at?
She's just smiling at her mama.
What were you doing behind the camera to get that smile?
No, she's just loving her life.
And it's just so cute.
Were you dangling food in front of her?
No.
Were you jingling something?
No, we were just sitting on the couch together.
And she was just fucking huffing and puffing because she was happy to see me.
Was she hot?
Is she trying to breathe?
Maybe.
No, I think she's really excited.
She smiles when it's 45.
It was when I got back from Sydney and she was just like really excited to see me.
You're back. But yeah, and I'm going to share those in the group.
I thought that was so cute. They are beautiful.
She's just so cute. I love it.
My love to see it is
Henrietta Chicken.
It's the best chicken place going around. What's Henrietta Chicken?
Do you know how I've got like Charcoal Charlie's?
Oh, Charcoal Charlie's. Charcoal Charlie's. Yeah. And it's really
good. Chicken chop. And we've spoken
about our love for a chicken chop.
Yeah.
Arguably too much.
Have you been to Smokey Chook's on Bridge Road?
No.
Is that also good?
No.
Apparently that's fucking elite.
So here's the thing about Henrietta Chicken, right?
Yeah.
It sounds like a weird Elizabethan chicken.
It sounds like Chicken Run, the sequel, Henrietta Chicken.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Like it sounds like a ye old ye oldie chicken. Yeah.
Like the chicken's gonna be in a
like frilly white dress. Well, she was.
Yeah, was she? Um,
the thing is though, you know how they're usually like a
takeaway shop? Yeah. And whilst
there's always like a few seats in there,
but like... They're not for sitting
and eating. You're not gonna be like, hey, talk.
It's for sitting while you're waiting for your takeaway. Yeah.
Or you're like sneaking a chip or two while you're waiting for, yeah.
You're not like, let's go out for dinner and sit at the fucking chicken shop.
No way.
So Henrietta, they've bought two shops, right?
One is like the.
Sorry, the way that you just said Henrietta, like this person I know, Henrietta.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They've got two shops.
Yeah.
Next to each other.
Like they've bought the place next door.
One is like the chicken shop, which is where they do the takeaway.
And the other is like an actual nice restaurant that's like licensed.
And so you know how sometimes with a chicken shop you can get like the salad
and the hummus and the tabbouleh and whatever.
And they always do like a little mousse or something afterwards.
Yeah.
And so it's an actual place where you can sit down.
I had like an Aperol Spritz.
They brought out like a cut up chicken with all the dips and like the Turkish bread and all that stuff.
And I've never, I've gone, oh, why don't all chicken shops have a place where you can actually chill and hang out?
Yeah.
And I was like, this is the best place ever.
That's my love to see it. You scoffed at my love to see it of Pippa smiling and your love to see it is a restaurant.
Did you know that you can eat at a restaurant?
Isn't that fucking insane?
It's a chicken place, though.
You wouldn't fucking believe it.
You actually fucking wouldn't.
There's a dining spot at Charcoal Charlie's as well.
Yeah, but that feels...
No, it's not the same.
Because you feel like you're sitting in a takeaway place.
No, it's a rest...
Yeah, but would ya?
There is literally...
Yeah, but would ya?
Have you been to Charcoal Charlie's and sat in there?
Yes.
At the Camberwell one?
Lies.
No, at the Camberwell one, yes, I have.
Because then we did our food shopping afterwards
because there's a Coles right there.
Okay, well, my love to see it is restaurants and dogs.
I love dogs and restaurants.
Not together, though.
Shut the fuck up.
All I'm saying is that you can't scoff at my You Love To See It
and then do the shittest You Love To See It ever.
Well, turns out I fucking can and have.
Welcome to the Tony room.
I just like you to apologise.
I, Ryan, apologise for scoffing.
I am sorry if you were offended.
I fucking hate when people do that.
If you're going to say sorry.
It's also like when people go, I owe you an apology.
No, I'll take it now.
So give it to me.
Yeah.
I'm here to collect my debt.
Saying you owe me $5 is different to giving me $5.
Don't tell me you owe me the money.
Put it in my pocket, bud.
Give it to me.
Put it in my hot little hand so I can go to the chicken shop.
Do you know they dine in now?
First of all.
Shame you're a fuckhead.
I'm sorry.
See you tomorrow at Hot Fun Garbage.
See you in St Kilda.
10am, St Kilda Beach.
I'm sorry.
January 21st.
Love ya, thanks.
Do you accept my apology?
Yep.
And your $10.
I want $5 as well.
And for you to take me to the chicken shop restaurant.
Did you know they're dying in now?
It's honestly, I love to see that.
See you tomorrow, 10am, St Kilda Beach.
People will back me up in the episodes, Fred.
They'll say that's actually a great idea.
Actually, if you went to Henrietta, you wouldn't scoff at it.
I'm not saying that Henrietta chicken is bad.
That sounds like what you're saying.
No, I'm saying that you making that a you love to see it
after scoffing at my you love to see it,
I think is a bit rich, is all I'm saying.
Well, the only thing richer than that is the delicious chicken
at Henrietta because it's delicious.
Are you fucking on a kickback, mate?
Are they paying you to say this?
No.
Do you reckon Henrietta's a pun on hen?
Maybe.
All's forgiven.
That's why I love to see it.
Is that fun?
All right, see you tomorrow, you hot fun garbage lovers.
They should have called it Henry Egger.
Henry Egger chicken.
That's good, isn't it?
See you tomorrow, 10am, St Kilda Beach.
Fucking love ya.
How did Henrietta cross the road?
Oh, chicken shop.
Ma, you can dine in.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Oh, to get to the dine-in chicken shop.
There's a fucking restaurant there.
You can get an April Spritz.
Is Charcoal Charlie's licensed?
I don't know.
That's it then.
What?
Spritz is at chicken chops
you can't
it's fine
like it's fine
see you tomorrow
I'm letting it go
I found garbage
see you tomorrow
love you bye
check all the papers