Toni and Ryan - The best breakups

Episode Date: March 2, 2022

The right way to break up with someone, and our sliding doors moments in life. Love ya! T xx Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAnd...Ryan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, Nick speaking. Nick, it's Tony and Ryan. How are you doing? I'm good, thanks mate. How are you? Good. We're wondering if you want to approve the podcast. Absolutely, I approve the podcast. Yay! Thanks, Nick! No worries. Hey, it's Nick from Sydney and I approve this podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:37 Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. I'm the vice captain of the ship. I'm the butter to Tony's bread. Have you just inhaled? What have you done? I just like got a weird snickle in my, like, you know when you just get, like, a weird tickly sniffy?
Starting point is 00:00:48 Like a puff of dust. Do you need a sneeze or something? No, I think I tapped my nose on the, like, pop filter on the microphone and it's just, like, tickled me in the wrong spot and I just was sitting here like a bunny, like. Can I do something? Wiggling my nose around. No, I think I need to have an antihistamine. I'll do it after this.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Do you want to do it before we talk into a microphone for half an hour? No. No, I don't. It's totally fine. I sound fine. You can't have a challenge. It's challenge mode. I'm going to try not to sneeze the whole time. Okay. Every week... How are you? I'm fine. We don't normally do this, so I thought it might be nice. End of the week, like, how are you feeling? I'm feeling good. I'm feeling good. There was a question that came through because last week you and I went out together on Saturday night.
Starting point is 00:01:27 We did. We had a few brewskis and wines. It was lovely, actually. Some cheese. I brought espresso martini stuff. That was delicious, that espresso martini. It topped off the night well, didn't it? It really did.
Starting point is 00:01:36 I feel. Yeah. It really did. Yeah. Someone messaged and said, I heard the Patreon exclusive episode and they had a question. Question. They said, did Ryan and Tony get drunk together or did Ryan just get drunk in Tony's presence?
Starting point is 00:01:51 Because from the episode, it was hard to tell which was which. Ryan got drunk in my presence. I had a few vinos, but I wasn't drunk. But you described me as? You were pretty loose. You weren't, like, annoying, though. We were just having fun. Just having fun. Like, it wasn't as if you were pretty loose. You weren't, like, annoying, though. We were just having fun. Just having fun.
Starting point is 00:02:06 Like, it wasn't as if you were throwing up in the bath and I was like, oh, I've got to take after Ryan. Was it inappropriate that I spent half the night wearing just a robe? No, I really liked it. I felt comfortable. Yeah. I was cosy. I was really settling in.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Like, we weren't out. We were in a hotel. Yeah, like, we were just having a couple of drinks and nibbles in a hotel It's not like we were out If we were at your house and you wore a robe the whole time That'd be weird That's kind of weird And the reason I was wearing a robe is because I was drinking in the hotel pool
Starting point is 00:02:34 Because you can drink in there Because you can drink in there Yeah, at Crown Thank you And I just put a robe on walking back to the room and you were already there And I was like, well, I can't have a shower now I'm just going to keep going No, don't blame that you can't have a shower on me being there.
Starting point is 00:02:46 I was loving it, though. I was like, what a good excuse for the people already here. I'm just going to keep being Hugh Hefner and just cruising around. And it keeps you cool for the night as well. Delicious. Yeah. Delicious. That was a really fun night.
Starting point is 00:02:55 Thank you. So just to clarify, it was just me. Yeah, just you. Tony was fine. I was fine. Provided the espresso martinis. I did. Every week people in our Patreon vote on a movie that we'll watch and review.
Starting point is 00:03:07 Yes. This week's categories were stoner movies. Yeah. And selected was. My idea, by the way. Great. Which I thought was fun. Great category.
Starting point is 00:03:14 Yeah. Dude, where's my car? You actually texted me back and said, yes, in capitals with an exclamation mark, which is not very you. I don't exclamation that often. You don't. You've done it to me twice this week and both times I almost fell off my chair. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:25 Yeah. Slippery when wet. I've just got one of those yellow signs with me all the time. The winning movie, Dude, Where's My Car? Yeah. I have never seen that before. Save it, mate. Save it.
Starting point is 00:03:40 That's coming up. Okay. But first. You need to tell me about Shmolly on the Shmingaloo Shreef. Well, I've spoken to Shmolly and she said it's fine to use her name Holly. Oh, Holly. Hi, Holly from the Ningaloo Reef. Lucky we disguised it now because heaven forbid we outed Shmolly.
Starting point is 00:03:56 Yeah, imagine. Can you describe this picture of Holly and just tell me what's in that picture there? So it's Holly. I'm assuming it's Holly. Yep. She's got beautiful straight teeth. Yep. And she's holding a cocktail and she's with another person.
Starting point is 00:04:11 I'm guessing a partner or boyfriend or husband. And they're both holding a cocktail. They're both smiling. How would you describe their mood? They both look really happy. They look relaxed. Yeah. But if you're living on the Ningaloo Reef,
Starting point is 00:04:25 you're fucking relaxed 24-7, aren't you? You are. Yeah. Let me read. So she posted that online. She's got beautiful straight teeth. Well, she... Doesn't she?
Starting point is 00:04:32 Does she have braces, Invisalign? Braces. Because I've currently got Invisalign from my friend's gorgeous smile's dentistry on Exhibition Street. Are you paying for those? No. I am, actually.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Holly and I went to high school together, been friends for a very long time, and I was, I would say, there through all of the braces, seen it all. Sure. So I've seen her. She deserves that smile. She does. It's a gorgeous smile.
Starting point is 00:04:55 So let me read. It's like she's gone to Gorgeous Smiles Dentistry on Exhibition Street. You're a fucking idiot. Let me read the caption that accompanied that great photo of the two of them. Yeah. It's black and white.
Starting point is 00:05:06 Is that just because you couldn't afford coloured ink on this one? The work printer. Yeah, I see, I see. Celebrating our breakup and not living together anymore. But most importantly, we're so happy and grateful that we're still best of mates. I know this is not the usual outcome in a situation and it's not normally a time of celebration,
Starting point is 00:05:28 but we're two of a kind and we're having margaritas and crayfish to enjoy our last meal together. Oh, my God. And this threw me because how much, probably incorrectly, do we associate breakups with, I hate them. Yeah. They're dead to me. I cut all their clothes off.
Starting point is 00:05:48 Yeah. This is great. It's all murky. And look at the smiles on their face. They live in obviously a small town. It's hard to just have a big breakup and I'm never going to see you again. You've got mutual friends, all that kind of stuff. Hey, this isn't really working out for us.
Starting point is 00:06:00 You know, we're going to have different partners in the future, blah, blah, blah. But we're in a small town. The reason we were together in the first place is we actually just really get along. Yeah. So, hey, we're going to move out. But we're still mates.
Starting point is 00:06:10 It's not quite right. Let's have a margarita. We've had a great run. And I'm going to look back on our time and say, hey, that was an enjoyable few years of our life. No hard feelings. Oh, wow. I think.
Starting point is 00:06:21 Is that weird? Like good weird? Like unexpected weird. I'm not going to say weird, but it is definitely different. But also because whenever someone breaks up, say a mate of yours breaks up with a partner, you're always like, oh, well, whose fault was it? Who did the thing?
Starting point is 00:06:36 Did they? Yeah, did someone cheat on somebody or was it just like not working? And it's always like that thing of like winning a breakup. Like you want to be the person that kind of comes out on top, but it's like, well, actually we're both probably quite hurt about whatever's happened. If you think you need to win a breakup, I can tell you right now, you've both already lost.
Starting point is 00:06:55 Put that on a fucking meme. That's fucking beautiful, mate. But I never get that. It's true, yeah. Because my whole thing is if the reason, you're with them for a reason and that's fine. And now you're not together for a reason. For a reason, yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:06 There's no like, if they're such an awful person, well, you've just lost two years of your life. You don't have to be angry at that. You can just be thankful that it happened and move on. Yeah, and just kind of go like, okay, well, I'm not going to be upset about that anymore. It's closed. It's done.
Starting point is 00:07:18 And that's what those guys are doing. Yeah, and obviously some breakups are like really complicated, and especially if you've been living together, then you're like, oh, no, you take the couch from Ikea, but I'm going to take, you know, that's a bit complicated as well, especially if it's a bit messier. But I think that obviously they've just gone, you know what, we love each other, but this is just not right,
Starting point is 00:07:37 as in Holly from the Ningaloo Reef. That's, yeah. So, Tony Lodge, how many partners have you had before Torb? How many boyfriends have you had? I've had three. Three. Torb's the third? Torb's included, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:51 So three, like, serious relationships. So of the other two then, were you the dumper, the dumpy? What happened? This might surprise you, but I've only ever been dumped. And by might surprise you, I mean absolutely it fucking won't. Well, they're lost, mate. I've only ever been dumped. Obviously the first guy, he's doing quite well for himself.
Starting point is 00:08:16 Yeah, so my high school boyfriend, Josh, he was great. Yeah. And, yeah, we went out when we were at high school for two years. That's a long time in high school. Which is like in dog years. Three weeks. Like marriage. Three weeks in high school is a decent stint.
Starting point is 00:08:30 Yeah. So we went out together for like two years and like our parents became friends and we used to like holiday together. Really? Yeah, it was great. Was there a time when you were like, oh, obviously this is it? A hundred percent, yeah. You were in it for the long game.
Starting point is 00:08:44 And I think that everybody at school as well was just like, oh, you guys are going to get married. Those guys were a lock, yeah. Yeah. And we got along great and, yeah, our families got along really well and we loved each other sick. So. Yeah, and it didn't work out.
Starting point is 00:09:00 Why are you laughing? No, just because, like, it obviously didn't work out, yeah. But what? I went to a – I started going to a different school. Which there is the equivalent of moving to London. Which is hard, yeah. And, yeah, just I ended up getting dumped in that situation and that's fine.
Starting point is 00:09:18 And then who was next then? And then I went out with another guy. Whose name? For probably about a year, maybe just shy of a year. Are we naming names? Not him. Can we just label, give him a label name? Second boyfriend.
Starting point is 00:09:35 Okay. So second boyfriend. What happened at the end of second boyfriend? Well, he dumped me. Why? I think that I was probably pretty clingy. What do you mean by that? Like I was probably just a bit like into it and he was just a bit not into it.
Starting point is 00:09:51 We're not victim blaming. We're not. No, no, no, no. This is your fault, mate. I was probably just like into it. He just wasn't really that into it. And yeah, it was like we met because we were in the same friendship group. And you know how that kind of, so I was like 17,
Starting point is 00:10:06 about to turn 18 when we started going out together. And, you know, you kind of, yeah, hanging out and going to parties every weekend and stuff. Like it was fun. Like we did fun and stupid shit together. Like it was, yeah, it was all good. It was like, yeah. I haven't like really, he's probably one of those boyfriends.
Starting point is 00:10:24 Like I haven't, we haven't spoken since. Right. Like he ended up going out with another girl like straight away and then we actually saw each other at an event that I flew home for just before COVID. Did he say hello? Yeah. Everyone was like, Tony, because they were not expecting me to arrive.
Starting point is 00:10:47 It was a funeral. They weren't expecting me to be there. And everyone went, oh, my God, Tony. It was very movie-like. He turned around and was like, holy shit. And I looked good. I was wearing this black jumpsuit. I looked great.
Starting point is 00:11:03 And I borrowed my sister-in-law's Audi, so I looked rich as. So I, like, drove in. I was like, mm-hmm, okay. Anyway, and he turned around and he was like, holy shit. And I was like, hey, how are you going? And we chatted a bit and he was like, how's your new life? What? Yeah, because, like, obviously, like, I live in Melbourne now
Starting point is 00:11:20 and things are pretty different. For people who live in Perth, when someone moves to the East Coast, it's like they're a new person now. Yeah. They're obnoxious new Tony. Yeah, and he was like, how's your new life? And I was like, pretty fucking great. Like, anyway, and yeah, so that was, but apart from, like,
Starting point is 00:11:37 he deleted me off Facebook and shit like that. Yeah. Anyway, but all good. He, yeah, he's doing great now. So when I mentioned, like, breakups and you kind of like died, why did you react like that? Oh, I guess like exactly what we're saying. You feel a bit embarrassed to be like, oh, I've only ever been dumped.
Starting point is 00:11:57 Yeah. But I also think that I just wasn't very confident. Like I wasn't confident in myself. You didn't have the confidence to do the dumping or to stay in the relationship no that I was just like of course I want to be with you because no one else would want to be like you know how you kind of strangely and back to Holly and the very mutual breakup with Margarita's it seems like the first dude who you got along well with that you still are aware of him and you know what he's up to and you're like happy for him yeah like it took a few years.
Starting point is 00:12:25 Right. But, like, yeah, now we follow each other on Instagram. Like, we're all good. But how much do you, because you guys are friendly now, you look back on that time as probably, like, a great time? Totally, yeah. Whereas with the other guy you're a bit like, oh, fucking whatever. Yeah, it was just, like, it is what it is, you know?
Starting point is 00:12:40 Like, no love lost because I'm like, oh, at the time I was fucking heartbroken but right now I'm like, okay, that happened. You would never have met Torbs? Do you think about weird shit like that? Yes, I do. Like sliding doors moments? Yes, all the time. Yeah, I've got some like very definite ones in my mind where I know
Starting point is 00:12:57 that like that moment has led to like the life I have now. What's the biggest randomest sliding doors moment that's changed everything? What's the biggest, randomest sliding doors moment that's changed everything? The reason that I decided to study what I studied at uni was because one afternoon I'd been job hunting for ages. I had just found out that I got rejected from WAPA for classical voice.
Starting point is 00:13:19 So I was supposed to be going and studying opera at WAPA. And to be an opera singer. To be an opera singer. And they were like, look, you're fantastic. You have a lot of potential, but you're just a bit young. And I was like, they're just being nice. I was obviously shit. But who knows?
Starting point is 00:13:34 Who knows? I wasn't shit. I was very good at the time. Maybe the feedback they were giving was the truth and you could have done a year later. And anyway, and then I was like, fuck, I've got to find something else to do. And I was listening to Pearl Jam and the song Black came on,
Starting point is 00:13:50 which is a fantastic song, and I was like, oh, my God, like music is so great. And I was like, wow, imagine if I got to make people feel the way that I feel right now all the time, but it wasn't by performing music, but it was making it. And I Googled sound engineering and I had $70 in my bank account and it cost $69 to apply for an audition. Holy shit. And I applied and I got in.
Starting point is 00:14:21 And then who else was studying sound engineering at the same school? The love of my life, Torbs. The heir to the Toblerone heir. Fortune? Heir to the Toblerone fortune, thank you. And if it wasn't for that Pearl Jam song, if you had $2 less in your bank account. I wouldn't have done it, yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:39 You would never have met Torbs. Yep. That's fucking crazy. Which is really wild, yeah. That is actually like when you were saying that, I was like chills. Yeah. And then like when my, because Torbs was actually, he started the year after I did.
Starting point is 00:14:53 And so I like kind of knew him but not really. And then when my mum passed away, I dropped out of uni because I was like, look, I'd been caring for her for a long time so I hadn't really been able to go to uni. I mean, you've got other things to deal with. Yeah, there's other stuff on. Probably don't need to justify that one. But, yeah, my mum passed away, I dropped out and I went
Starting point is 00:15:13 to a party and met up with everyone at uni and I was like, fuck, I really miss everyone so much. Oh, my God. Yeah, and I ended up rejoining and we were in the same year. Ah. Yeah, and that's how we, we like got to know each other again. Yeah. Actual chills.
Starting point is 00:15:27 So many different things. I mean. What's yours? Do you have like that one thing? Sorry, we got a bit off topic, but it's pretty cool. Hang on. I've got a follow-up question. Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
Starting point is 00:15:38 Question. If you got into that opera course. Yeah. I know it's not called the opera course. Classical voice. Classical voice. Obviously at the time you were like, this is the one thing I want. Looking back now, if you had have got that,
Starting point is 00:15:54 would your life be better or worse? I don't want to say better or worse, but it would be completely different. You would never have met Torbs. You've never listened to Pearl Jam. You wouldn't be Tony Roddy from the radio. Yeah, like I wouldn't be doing this podcast, that's for sure. That's pretty big. Yeah, and this has gotten a bit deep, I guess,
Starting point is 00:16:16 but isn't it crazy when you think about those times in your life when everything just feels like it's going fucking wrong? Like both times that I got dumped, I was like, my life is fucking over. And I didn't get into WAPA the first time, so I thought my life is fucking over. And not getting a job at fucking JB Hi-Fi when I wanted it, I thought my life is fucking over.
Starting point is 00:16:36 And now I'm thinking about all those things and if I had have gotten it, my life wouldn't be as fucking great as it is now. I love all of this. However, I'm struggling to keep a straight face. The JB Hi-Fi. How many people... You know that's what I want! So many people didn't get a job at an electrical store.
Starting point is 00:16:54 For people in the US, we're talking about, like, Best Buy. And it's like, I didn't get a job at Best Buy. My life is over. It was, okay. This is not what I wanted. Yeah. Does someone who listens to this podcast know someone that works at JB Hi-Fi?
Starting point is 00:17:08 That can get me a fucking job? Or just a fucking lanyard so it looks like you work there. I would literally walk around and be like, hey, champ, you need a hand? We got you, man. Do you work here? No, I'm just wearing a fucking lanyard because I'm a loser. I'm cosplaying someone that works at JB Hi-Fi.
Starting point is 00:17:23 But seriously, if Tony could do a casual shift, I'm sure she'd be great on a Sunday. Excuse me, mate, I'm just setting up the laptop. What kind of mouse do I need to plug into the podcast thing? Oh, hey, bro, this fucking, this mouse will do you. Yeah. I've got to get more tattoos first probably, but yeah, I'm into it. I'll just make the ones you've got more prominent.
Starting point is 00:17:38 Okay. Get them out. Yeah, all right. And the tans, obviously. I'm trying to think of a sliding doors moment for me. Well, I mean, imagine if a different family adopted you. Oh, literally. Okay.
Starting point is 00:17:50 You want to hear some numbers? This sounds very basic. No, you want to hear some numbers? Please. The year I was adopted. Yeah. There were, I believe in the state. You've actually told me this before and I'm going to start to cry.
Starting point is 00:18:01 Yep. In the state of Victoria, there was about 1,500 couples that applied to adopt a child. Oh, my God. And I believe there were 20 children, 20 babies that were available. Yeah. And so there are 1,500 alternate lives and families I could have had. Oh, and I'm worried about JB Hi-Fi.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Yeah. But having said that, my main concern is that I have also not worked at JB Hi-Fi. You could have worked at JB Hi-Fi 1,500 times. 800 of the 1,500 other lives could have involved an audio store. You could have been the manager and you could have hired me. We fucked up here. We fucked this right up. We fucked this right up.
Starting point is 00:18:45 We fucked this right up. But that's literally. That's insane. Think about all those lives. And because I went to family in Eltham with mum and dad and then I went to Eltham High. Eltham High was like a school that was really into volleyball. Yeah, and that was obviously where you.
Starting point is 00:19:00 And that's where I met my best friends. I got into college and I know I joke about that all the time, but I wasn't probably smart enough to get into uni, so volleyball was actually like the back door into university. Look at the scholarship. Not on academic merit. And so even if I had gone to a different high school, that would have completely changed everything else as well.
Starting point is 00:19:18 And I would never have met you or my wife. But we would have. Or that. Secondary. It's like I wouldn't have met Tony. Damn it. Would never have worked at JB Hi-Fi. Damn it.
Starting point is 00:19:29 Wouldn't have met my wife. Brianna. Bridget. No, but there are a few times I think about Bridget because she was the roommate of a person I worked with in radio. And I'm like, if I never went to that station, if I never did that show, I would never have met Bridget. And I'm like, I can't even function without Bridget.
Starting point is 00:19:47 So heaven forbid what my life would be like if I didn't go there. I totally, yeah. Welcome to our comedy podcast. Yeah, and up next we're talking about, dude, where's my car? Oh! Hey, it's Nick from Sydney and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive thank you to a few of our champion Patreons over at our Patreon. Yep.
Starting point is 00:20:24 The Patreons on the Patreon. Patreon.com slash Tony and Ryan. Liam Mills, Zach Rankin, Megan B and Ashley Olsen and Mary-Kate I guess is there as well. Thank you. Thank you so much for being part of our Patreon. People in the Patreon voted for the best stoner movie. Great category by Tony. Great category.
Starting point is 00:20:40 I reckon we might do that category again because there was a lot of great ones to choose from. There are a lot of very good ones. I can't believe that Pineapple Express didn't win. That's one of my favourite movies. I was surprised that didn't get up. It was even hard picking things to vote on. Half Baked didn't even get in there.
Starting point is 00:20:54 I love that movie so much. But the winner was Dude, Where's My Car? I've never seen it. I cannot believe you've never seen Dude, Where's My Car? I tell you what makes me feel really old. That came out 22 years ago. How young does Ashton Kutcher look? Yeah, and Sean William Scott, obviously, from American Pie and everything.
Starting point is 00:21:14 But does Ashton Kutcher strangely remind you of Andy Lee? Maybe the shaggy hair? The long hair, like dorky vibe. Yeah. Anyway, I've never seen it before. I can't believe. It came out when I was 13 years old and I, watching the movie last night, thought to myself, oh, this is a movie made for 13-year-old boys.
Starting point is 00:21:35 Yeah. It is childish and I'm going to say it, it's shit. Okay. Think about that while I say something. So the embarrassing thing for me this week was that, so you obviously watched this movie last night. Yep. I didn't have to watch it last night because I watched it last week.
Starting point is 00:21:53 Why? You chose to watch this out of your own free will? Yep, yep, because in the afternoon. Why? So very recently. This is why you should have got a job at JB Hi-Fi. I know. I would have bought way cooler DVDs.
Starting point is 00:22:11 In the afternoon, so very recently, I have changed my working hours at my full-time job from 9 to 5 to 7 to 3 so that between 3 and 5 or 6 I can do like Tony and Ryan stuff. Yep. So I'm working long days at the moment. I've got a lot of, like, projects on the go. I'm proud of you. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:22:28 But you too. I mean, you're going to fucking uni and everything. Like, it's a lot. Anyway, and so in the afternoon I kind of need to just, like, put something stupid on while I'm working. Excuse me. Are you about to say you put a movie on in the background? No.
Starting point is 00:22:42 That same thing that you accused me of and got angry at last week when I said I did with Catch Me If You Can. But I wouldn't. Oh, you've changed your tune. I put movies on in the background all the time, but I just wouldn't put an intense movie on like Catch Me If You Can. Catch Me If You Can's not intense. It's a fun Pink Panther-esque escapee movie.
Starting point is 00:22:58 It's a good, it is actually probably not so bad if you've seen it a few times, but it's not something you would, I would never consider that as like a background movie having now watched dude where's my car i would recommend having it while doing anything else yes because to distract you from the movie because it is yeah like i as much as i love a great movie i also love shit movies yeah happily watch a shit movie yeah i was bored yeah i was like this is just so yeah give me something to like i wanted to like it i think that so i put it on do you still like it well no but i mean i put it on last week um and fell asleep i also did not i can't tell you where the car was because i didn't get to the end of it. Yeah, so I put it on last week, but I know what happens because I, when I was younger, we used to go to Broome,
Starting point is 00:23:51 which is in the top of WA, every single year on holiday. How far drive from Perth? 2,000 k's. So we would drive for two full days in the car. My dad would drive, my mum would be in the front, and we would all be in the back. And as I got a little bit, so every single year we would drive to and from Broome, every single July school holidays.
Starting point is 00:24:07 We'd go for two weeks. We would stay in the caravan park. We had like a camper trailer and stuff. Anyway, and as I got a bit older and my brothers and sisters like drove themselves in their own car or like drove with boyfriends or girlfriends or whatever because everyone went and everyone could bring friends or a boyfriend or whatever. My high school boyfriend, Josh, actually came to Broome with us once.
Starting point is 00:24:28 Did he do that before he dumped you? Yeah. Sorry, that's rude. That was fucking brutal. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, wow. God, luckily we were all over it. Imagine you're 10 hours into that trip.
Starting point is 00:24:39 And he's like, I'm not interested in this. I don't actually think this is for me. Yeah, but I really wanted to come to Broome though. Do you want me to just drop you off? Are you still coming? Okay. Or do I just leave you here in... Okay.
Starting point is 00:24:49 ...Karafa? Nice. Anyway, and as I got a bit older, it was a bit boring in the back of the car, and mum and dad bought me one of those like... Portable DVD players? Portable DVD players. Yeah, fucking sorry. You guys do it all right.
Starting point is 00:25:00 Look out. Millionaires. Coming through. And we bought it while we were in Broome and we bought, like we were like, oh, we'll buy some DVDs. We went to the video shop and bought X Rentals. Sorry, are you Broome or Dubbo? No, the video shop's only just opened in Dubbo.
Starting point is 00:25:17 Oh, sorry, my mistake. We went to the video shop and they had a deal and it was like four X Rentrentals for $20 or something. Couldn't make it for that much. And I got Bedazzled, the film with Elizabeth Hurley and Brendan Fraser in it, How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days. Great film. Amazing film.
Starting point is 00:25:36 Princess Diaries. Classic. And Dude, Where's My Car? There's definitely an odd one out there. So I watched those four movies. 18 times. Approximately 5 million times in my childhood because they'd be like the ones we left in the car.
Starting point is 00:25:50 Yeah. And so I've seen Dude, Where's My Car a lot of times. The irony of you watching that in the car as well. Dude, Where's My Car. Oh, here it is. I'm fucking sitting in it. Far out. So I guess it has the nostalgia feel.
Starting point is 00:26:04 But Torbs walked in and was like, what are you fucking watching? And I was like, dude, it was my car. And he was just like, no, I haven't seen it. And I was like, oh, what a shame. Because Torbs and I are into good movies. Yeah, and that's fine. That's like our thing. Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:26:16 One thing that I couldn't stop thinking about watching it. It hasn't aged super well. No, it hasn't. No, it hasn't. No. No. Also, yeah. Yeah, it has not super well. No, it hasn't. Definitely hasn't. No, it hasn't. No. No. Also, yeah. Yeah, it has not aged well.
Starting point is 00:26:29 Jennifer Garner. Yeah. She's better than that. I don't think she is. Not then. She's fucking like 15 in that movie. No, she's not. She's probably 20 or something.
Starting point is 00:26:39 But I mean, like for all the great things she's done in her life, that's not the thing she looks back on and goes. No. So this is what I couldn't stop thinking about. Yeah. As soon as I saw Jennifer, and this is my whole mindset, the whole movie. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:26:52 As soon as I saw Jennifer Garner, I thought, you have taken care of that piece of shit, Ben Affleck. And then for 10 years, taking him in and out of rehab, take care of him, driven him home when he was drunk, taking care of the family, and now he's with J-Lo swanning around. Yeah, he's hot and cool again and he's off with someone else. And as soon as I saw Jennifer Garner, I couldn't care about the movie and I just cared about her.
Starting point is 00:27:18 Oh, did you reach out to her on Twitter? I said hi. Yeah. She said don't message me. Oh, okay. Maybe she thought you were Ryan John Affleck. Maybe she thought... Yeah, I obviously didn't message her, but
Starting point is 00:27:30 I don't know why, and maybe it's because there wasn't much else happening in the movie. Oh, that's really rude. But I saw her and I was just like, oh, you poor thing. You've got stuff on. Yeah, you've got stuff on. You've got better things to do than replay this role for me. Obviously, I know it was pre-recorded. Yeah, it was live. Oh, You've got better things to do than replay this role for me. Obviously, I know it was pre-recorded. Yeah, we're live.
Starting point is 00:27:46 Oh, yeah, we'll watch Dude, Where's My Car live tonight. Yeah, I'll just give Ashton a call. I mean, he's got time. Does he? Is he like a tech entrepreneur or something now? He's like busy. He's married to Mila Kunis. I mean, good for him.
Starting point is 00:27:59 He's done well. Yeah. Yeah, he has. I don't know. I just couldn't get a part. So what happens in the end? So they find the continuum transformer. And what is that thing?
Starting point is 00:28:12 Is it actually a thing? Yeah. It's in the Rubik's Cube that Sean William Scott's character is flicking around with the whole time. That was in the suits that they got made. Right. Yep, and they find that and then the group of girls in the jumpsuits turn into a super alien and they kill the super alien
Starting point is 00:28:31 and they figure out that, like, the two guys were the true keepers of the Continuum Transfunctioner. What about the nerdy friends? The nerdy friends. In the car with this hand. Oh, the Zoltan. Yeah. They end up getting to go to space, which is quite cool.
Starting point is 00:28:44 For them. Yeah, I guess. Anyway, and then the two guys, the European guys, they do the like men in black like memory thing. Yeah. And then they wake up and like it goes back to the beginning of the film and they're like, you know how they get out of bed and stuff? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:03 Yeah, and then they walk out to get the car and they're like, where's the car? And it's like behind a mail truck. So it's like it never happened. Ah, okay. But then they find the presents for the girlfriends. Were the presents good? What were they?
Starting point is 00:29:15 Like a necklace and something else. And then they go back together? Yeah. No, Jennifer Garner. They were already together earlier in the film. They get back together when they rescue them from the Zoltan people. I didn't get to that part. Okay.
Starting point is 00:29:29 So Jennifer Garner just always ends up with the jerks. That's the moral of this story. But then, like, in the gifts, there's something from the keepers, the European guys. So it's like, did it all happen? Oh, none of it even happened. They were just stoned. But then there's, like, a message from them.
Starting point is 00:29:44 So it's like, oh, it did actually happen.'s a real inception kind of vibe don't put a great movie like inception anywhere near but anyway um sorry for anybody that watched that because of our recommendation i just thought can i just say it wasn't a recommendation it was just part of the it was a vote the people had a vote. The people had spoken. Yeah, so I just don't want anyone to be like, oh, your recommendation's a shit because it wasn't a recommendation. Has today's episode been weird because we just talked about Tony getting dumped in terrible movies?
Starting point is 00:30:14 No, that's great. That's the story of my life. Hey, before we go, things you love to see. Someone did a tweet when... Good for them. You know the Google Maps car, like it drives around and does a little record? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's all colourful and stuff. When Google Maps crew drove past my family house, my dad was out the front in the garden.
Starting point is 00:30:38 Do you know what I'm about to say? Yeah, I do. This broke my heart, but it was beautiful. My dad died three years ago, but any time I go on Google Maps, I see him doing what he loved the most, spending time out the front of the garden. So any time I want to catch up with Dad, he's always there on Google Maps. Doesn't that just not break your heart, but it's just a beautiful story, isn't it? It is really nice.
Starting point is 00:31:00 You've seen that during the week pop up? Oh, I've seen it before. It's like a similar story. Yeah. It is lovely. Lovely. Let's hope they don't retake those photos and it's gone. Well, that's what I thought.
Starting point is 00:31:10 I'm like, surely every, what, three to five years they might have to update them. They would redo it. Yeah. It's the same as when people, like, call someone's voicemail. Oh, yeah, leave a message. Or, like, just to hear the voice or whatever. And then, like, the number gets reallocated and you call and you think you're going to hear your mum's voicemail
Starting point is 00:31:28 but it's fucking, like, Ned has got the number now and he's like, stop fucking calling me, you know, like... Shout out to Ned, though. He's been quite tolerable with us. Yeah, thanks, Ned. My Love To See It was shared by Cake By Kendall, which is if you're in Melbourne and you need a cake, Kendall is fucking fantastic.
Starting point is 00:31:43 I ordered stuff from her recently for Valentine's Day for Torbs. Really? Paid for it, like all good. But, yeah, she's amazing. Anyway, she shared this Instagram story. Ski pro saves a 40-kilo sheep stuck on top of a New Zealand mountain. And it's this guy holding a huge sheep and he's got, like, his ski clothes on and the goggles and everything. And he's holding this massive sheep and he's got like his ski clothes on and the goggles and everything.
Starting point is 00:32:06 And he's holding this massive sheep and he skis down the hill and saves the sheep from, I guess, getting frozen to death. Yeah, he'd be so cold even though he's covered in that glorious wool. Yeah, and he grabs him from the top of the mountain and skis him down, which is very sweet. From the top of the... Mountain. Mountain. Mountain.
Starting point is 00:32:28 But you love to sheep that. You love to sheep that. I've always loved to sheep that. We say that a lot on this show, on this sheep. But thank you so much for listening. It's Thursday. Hope you had a great week. If you want to hear a little bit more of Tony and Ryan,
Starting point is 00:32:43 you can head over to our Patreon. We've got a few exclusive episodes there. You have to pay, though. Sorry. I mean, art's not free. Next week. You don't get chatting about fucking dude, where's my car for nothing. Tony has got the all clear and we will be doing our Patreon run.
Starting point is 00:33:01 Patronion. Patron run. That's coming up soon. Yes. But until then. You just said next week and soon. Yeah. It's not next weekron run. That's coming up soon. Yes. But until then. You just said next week and soon. Yeah. It's not next week probably.
Starting point is 00:33:09 We're going to see. Soon. We're going to see what we can meow. What we can meowganise. Love you. Bye.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.