Toni and Ryan - The Caped Thumb

Episode Date: March 28, 2023

We have our very own social study in our midst, and we wanna know how you think we did... Go to today's Facebook thread for the photo evidence!! Love ya xo Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/Toniand...Ryan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Plus you can find the links to order Toni's book here! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to the podcast. Welcome. My name is Ryan. This is author Tony Lodge and we are speaking to Jade who is in New South Wales. Oh NSW. NSFW. Not safe for work. Hello? Hi is that Jade? Yeah. Hi it's Tony and Ryan. Oh, no way! I was just about to say, have we woken you up, Jade? You sound tired. Or have we called you in a library, like you're not interested in talking to us? No, no, I am. I've just taken the day off.
Starting point is 00:00:36 Got into a car accident, smashed my car, long story. Oh, are you okay? Yeah, totally fine. That's good news. Will you approve the podcast? Yeah, I'd love to approve the podcast, guys. Oh, yay. Oh, good.
Starting point is 00:00:52 Hey, it's Jade from Newcastle, New South Wales, and I approve this podcast. All right, coming up today. I think I've crossed that line where I know I'm old and not fun anymore. I could have probably told you that. Yeah, but like, you know how sometimes people need to learn it for themselves? You know that kind of vibe where you can take a horse to water but you can't make it realise it's old. Sorry, what?
Starting point is 00:01:28 But you can't make it realise it's old. I was caught in the middle of some fun and I didn't like it. I actually, I should be able to pay you out here but I don't think I can because I think maybe, yeah, I mean it might not be the same fun but I've been caught in fun and I've gone, I didn't like that. Yeah, I don't like that. I take this seriously.
Starting point is 00:01:47 So that's coming up soon. But first, you might have heard about this theory that suggests there's like a scientific and biological reason that people are often attracted to people who look like their parents. Oh. Have you heard of this? Is it a bit like how people say they look like their dogs? Is it a bit like that?
Starting point is 00:02:10 I don't think. I mean, no. But you know how they say that. I think I look a bit like Pippa. Pippa looks like you. She's got my eyes. Her eyes are brown and mine are blue. They're not like the same at all.
Starting point is 00:02:23 They don't actually look any different. Any more different. Yeah. You don't have any. Yeah. Yeah. I don the same at all. They couldn't actually look any different. Any more different. Yeah. You don't have any – yeah. Yeah. I don't know how to break it to her that she was adopted. I think both – How did your mum tell you?
Starting point is 00:02:36 She said, Ryan, you know how my eyes are blue and yours are brown? And I'm a dog and you're a human. Yeah. And that time we went and got you neutered. And I was like, yeah. You know how you wee outside and I wee inside? Yeah. It's because we're not the same.
Starting point is 00:02:51 I was like, oh, I thought it was just more like a power play. I thought you were just sending me out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But if you and mum want to check notes for letting Pippa know. That's actually really kind of you. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:03 I'll give Mandy a call and I'll be like, look, I'm just struggling with this. Yeah. So at the moment BJ and I, my dog, we outnumber Bridget in terms of purebreds versus adoptees. Yeah. Because we're just a couple of rescues in the house. Yeah, that's nice.
Starting point is 00:03:17 So any time Bridget does, you know, something, we go, typical. Yeah. These purebreds. You don't get it. You don't understand. You don't get us. Oh, but soon there'll be two on two. It'll be even. And it's still going to be boys versus girls. Yeah. Yeah. These purebreds. You don't get it. You don't understand. You don't get us. Oh, but soon there'll be two on two. It'll be even.
Starting point is 00:03:26 And it's still going to be boys versus girls. Yeah. Yeah. Those purebreds, man. Yeah. Fucking, they got it easy. So I got this article. Sorry, to conclude, I think there's something in looking like a dog,
Starting point is 00:03:38 but I don't think this is it. Okay. Yeah, this is a different thing. I got an article from a psychology professor with a PhD. Pretty huge dick. Dr. Tasman Saxton. Oh, I got an article from a psychology professor with a PhD. Pretty huge dick. Dr Tasman Saxton. Oh, I bet he's got a big Saxton. Has a PhD.
Starting point is 00:03:51 Animals of many species learn what a suitable mate looks like based on the appearance of their parents. So here's how it works, right? It's like the safety. Well, you see your parents as safety and supportive and comforting and loving. And then there's something the safety. Well, you see your parents as safety and supportive and comforting and loving. Yes. Yep. And then there's something in you that goes, oh, all of those characteristics.
Starting point is 00:04:11 Yeah. That's what it looks like this. Yeah. When you see this, that equals the loving and the caring and the safety. So is it just the way that they look or like the way they behave or like is this study one side in particular or just in general? The study suggests that what we deeply want is the characteristics and we, in inverted commas, learn that that's what the characteristics look like.
Starting point is 00:04:36 Like if you picked up a bottle of Coke that had water in it, you'd go, well, this is a bottle of Coke. Yeah, I've seen the Coke. You look like I know what I'm looking at. Yeah. Oh, God. I've seen the Coke. I know what I'm looking at. Yeah. Yep. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:04:49 I've just really family therapised myself. Yeah, all the way down. Family therapised. Therapised. I've just sent you, look at your phone. Oh, yep. I can do that. Jessica Alba's partner and Jessica Alba's- Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:05:01 Dad. As if they aren't the same person. Jessica Elber's dad and Jessica Elber's partner are the same person. Like, yeah. So we share a studio. So just hang on. So does Bridget look like Mandy? Or do you think that Bridget looks like your birth mother,
Starting point is 00:05:28 which you wouldn't know? I don't know what she looks like. A Bridget doppelganger is running around. I'm not going to say that because that's gross. Okay. Because it's like a learnt behaviour from seeing someone, it wouldn't be birth mother because you don't see them as, because then you would see them as someone who leaves.
Starting point is 00:05:50 Because Bridget lived with you, you're like, not the same. Not the same. Not the same. But no, Bridget doesn't look like my mum. No, your mum does not look like Bridget at all. They're very different. Although I'll tell you what's weird, and this is not related to this study.
Starting point is 00:06:01 When I met my biological family in the US, a long lost cousin, her and Bridget look fucking exactly the same. I've seen the cousin you're talking about. And wear the same glasses. Yeah. And I was like. We might have crossed a Y here by accident. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:19 Anyway. Anyway. So here at work at the Tony and Ryan HQ, we share this podcast studio with Dil Buckley. Yes. Now Dil is a professional, was a former professional footballer. So he says, yeah. So he says.
Starting point is 00:06:32 Now he's like a sports podcaster. We share an office. We use the same studio. We get along great as well. And to sort of support his podcast and stuff, we went along. Tony said she was drunk at the football the other night at the pub. Yeah, that was their event. It was their event.
Starting point is 00:06:44 So they're like, oh, we're going to watch the first game and do a podcast live recording. It's like, great, we went along. Tony said she was drunk at the football the other night at the pub. Yeah, that was their event. It was their event. So they're like, oh, we're going to watch the first game and do a podcast live recording. It's like, great, we'll come down. And so his beautiful wife, Justine, is there. Who works here as well. So we know Just pretty well. And then the rest of Dil's crew is there. His mates are there.
Starting point is 00:06:59 And then he goes, and guys, this is my mum. And we went, lovely to meet you, blah, blah, blah. How's it all going? Great. And then we're sitting there and we're like, jeez. Because may I just add, all three of us were there. So it was Tony, Ryan and producer Cam. Yeah, we're all there.
Starting point is 00:07:14 And we went, gee, Justine does look like her mum, hey. And then someone had to go, no, that's not her mum. That's Dil's mum. And they look identical. Spitting image. Like, honestly, you believed that it was Jazza's mum purely because they just looked identical. So I think all I want to know, and this is what the chat turned
Starting point is 00:07:38 into at the pub, was like we spoke to some other people and they go, yeah, I know, right? Yeah. And then we spoke to each other and, yeah, I know, right? And then someone actually overheard and went, you guys talking about Jazza and Dil's mum people and they go, yeah, I know, right? Yeah. And then we spoke to each other and, yeah, I know, right? And then someone actually overheard and went, you guys talking about Jazz and Dil's mum? And we went, yeah. And they went, yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:50 Yeah. And so I guess the question I have is does Dil know? Do they know? Yeah. So I think he's here. Producer Cam, do you want to go and get Dil? And let's ask him. Because it is one of those things where you go, well, do you,
Starting point is 00:08:04 we know, do they know? Yeah. Dil, we have a question for you. I don't know why I'm doing this. And you'll either know that it's true and know exactly what we're talking about or we might have like shattered something for you that you might not be able to unsee. Okay.
Starting point is 00:08:20 So thanks for having us at your event. Well, thanks for having me on the show. Thanks for having us at your event. Well, thanks for having me on the show. Thanks for having us at the event the other night. Thank you. I don't know what this is about, by the way. Yeah, it was great to meet you and the family and the whole crew and go out and stuff like that. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:08:35 Because obviously we know your wife, Jaz, because she works in here. But wasn't it wonderful to meet Dil's mum? Yeah. I love my mum. Yeah. Must be nice that she was there. Yeah, must be really nice. I love my mum. Yeah. Must be nice that she was there. Yeah, must be really nice. I'm dying to.
Starting point is 00:08:47 I was just curious to know if you're aware that your mum and Justine look identical. What? You didn't know that? No, not at all. Did you really not? Has anyone ever said this to you before? No one's ever said that to me once.
Starting point is 00:09:00 That's all anyone was talking about. We actually surveyed quite a few people at the event and everybody agreed. And someone actually, I just said this before you came in, someone actually overheard and said, are you talking about Jaz and Dil's mum? We went, yeah. And they went, yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:16 No way. That's never, ever, I've never, ever had that said at all, ever. Are you joking? Never. Do you have a picture handy of your mum and maybe a picture of – if you don't, that's okay. Actually, just show us one. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:29 Actually, if you've got one, you've got both, I feel. Maybe has your mum posted on Facebook recently or something like that because we just want you to see. Okay. I'm getting a photo. I don't know where this is going. Deb Pierce. Actually, don't follow her.
Starting point is 00:09:48 She will love it. She follows all the ex-Maffs contestants. Oh, your mum's on your close friends. I reckon turn your phone off Wi-Fi because the Wi-Fi here is shit. Yeah, our landlord sucks. Okay. So here's my mum. As if you don't think she looks exactly like Jaz.
Starting point is 00:10:09 Oh, no. They're both stunning. Yeah, and I bet you think they're both stunning. So that's me and my mum? She looks exactly like your wife, Jaz. No, she does not. You're kidding yourself. Okay, you keep that open and I'll open Jazza's Instagram.
Starting point is 00:10:26 And Cam, can you just invite everyone else from the office into the studio real quick? I just want to do a quick straw poll. Yeah, I wouldn't mind that. I wouldn't mind that. I've never heard this before. Well, they've already discussed it. I'm actually surprised that you didn't know.
Starting point is 00:10:38 It's a little bit weird if this is true. Quick question. Do you reckon Justine looks exactly like Dil's mum? Dil's mum. Yeah. Exactly. I'm not going to commit to it, but I think that there is some similar features. Similar features.
Starting point is 00:10:53 Zach, what do you reckon? I actually thought it was Justine's mum. You're kidding. I've never had anyone say that before, ever. Well, there's about five people saying it right now. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and I've found a study that...
Starting point is 00:11:08 I can't. Yeah. Neither can I. We've just been talking about a study that kind of shows why, because your mum is obviously like caring and supportive and beautiful. I will say this. Everything I love in my mum, my wife has. Including you.
Starting point is 00:11:25 No, no, no. Don't. Including you. No, no, no. Don't, no, not that stuff. What are you talking about? What is going on here? I honestly thought you would have known. No, no, never ever been told that in my life. Now that you're thinking about it, can you see it now that you're thinking about it?
Starting point is 00:11:45 Like is there any part of it? Because I think, Jaz, your wife looks more like your mum than she looks like her sister. No way. No way, man. No way. They look exactly, her sister and her look very similar. No, no.
Starting point is 00:12:00 This is so strange. I've never had anyone say. But you guys haven't seen my sister. So once you saw my... Oh, she looked like him as well. I actually do look quite similar. This is painting me off to be really weird. No, let me read this sentence still because it's actually not about
Starting point is 00:12:18 as gross as you think. Okay, good. A child views a parent as supportive, caring, loving, and nurturing, and they learn that these characteristics look like this so when you see someone similar your brain goes oh that person's obviously supportive and caring and loving and nurturing that would be completely true i see like exactly as i've said before the qualities that i love in my wife i see are very similar to what i love about my mom yeah like her face no no no no i did not think that was the F word you were going to say.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Yeah, that's. Oh, vagina. Oh, sorry. Sorry. It's okay. Adil, I just wanted to know if you knew. So now you can process this information as you please. I thought we were going to be talking about fingering assholes today
Starting point is 00:13:00 because that's what we were talking about the other night. What? Okay, I better leave. Yeah, speaking of your mum and your sister. Did you appreciate seeing Tony having more than one drink and being a bit lippy? You were really funny last week. Oh, thank you. And can I just say as well, so good to see Ryan out.
Starting point is 00:13:18 Yeah. I don't know if people think, do they know he, like, promises a lot and never delivers anything? That seems to be. He had been saying he was going to come to about 15 events, didn't come to any, and he was there. So I was really happy. And I said it was a big thing for you to come, so I appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:13:31 Thank you. You're welcome. He's actually really milking the fact that he went to an event. Yeah, he's loving it. We've talked about it. We've talked about the event on the pod a few times now because he's like, yeah, I did something. I'd love to talk about it.
Starting point is 00:13:45 Just out and about on the town. He's the man of the town. I think that he's tired this week. Yeah, I didn't do much. He's in the vent on the weekend. Yeah, had a big weekend by having two beers on Thursday. So, yeah, good time. Dil, thank you.
Starting point is 00:13:55 Thanks so much, guys. Appreciate it. I think. Yeah, you're welcome. We'll debrief after. Yeah, debrief. He's going to walk out and do that thing like, you know, when you're at a party and you go to the toilet and you realise
Starting point is 00:14:09 how drunk you are? He's going to walk out there, go to the toilet and go, fuck, they do look the same. He's going to do that. He's going to have that moment of realisation. Hey, it's Jade from Newcastle, New South Wales, and you're listening to Tony and Rhyme. A big shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Yep.
Starting point is 00:14:37 Lucia Capizzudo, Abby Stoned, oh, bitchies, Jordan Rodriguez, Mel Lander and Adam Preeti. Thank you so much for being part of the Patreon. We bloody love to see it. This Saturday, if you're in Sydney or New South Wales or you're just really keen, 9am at the Sydney Opera House. This is not an official event. No. But we are filming Tony singing I Still Call Australia Home
Starting point is 00:15:01 and the final shot of the whole video that Tony's travelling to the outback of Australia, down to the Great Ocean Road, all over, the final big hero moment, we want to have the big choir behind her, and you can be that choir. White shirt, black pants, 9am this Saturday morning. It's going to be awesome. And if you're in Adelaide, we can see you tomorrow at 6pm at the Balls. The Mall Balls. Thes. The Mall Balls. The Rundle Mall Balls.
Starting point is 00:15:27 So did I hear correctly when we were having a coffee this morning, Tony, that Torbs was complaining about the price of getting a haircut? So the thing, so Torbs, like, loves going and getting his hair done. Does he get, like, the head massage? No, I don't think they do that in a barbershop, do they? That's more of like a salon thing. Sometimes. My TikTok algorithm is just this guy in Turkey who's a barber
Starting point is 00:15:51 who like bashes people. So he's like slapping their face and rubbing their head and like doing all the things. There's a bit of like face cleanse. You know, I'm sure there's like an actual purpose to it. You know, like an exfoliator rub and stuff. But sometimes the barbers now, they can really turn it on. Is that what he's doing now?
Starting point is 00:16:08 I don't think so. But he goes in there, he gets along with the guy that does his hair really well. He's followed him around to a few different salons. Yeah, he's gone to quite a few different barbershops to keep going to this guy, Jordan. And anyway, so he always goes, gets his haircut and comes back like a different guy. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:16:28 Oh, he just, he's just, he's got, he's an inch taller. He's, fuck, he's just got this vibe about him. Has he got riz? Yeah, that like joie de vivre or whatever it's called. Like just that new, that girl energy. What's that Bee Gees song that's in a movie with John Travolta? Like when he's walking down the street and he's like staying alive? I don't know what movie you're talking about.
Starting point is 00:16:52 I know the song, but. And the movie's Saturday Night Fever? It is. But just imagine like a cool leather panted John Travolta. So you've got that strut. Swagger. Yeah. And just like up and about feeling good.
Starting point is 00:17:03 You're like, tonight is the night. He's just always really feeling himself. And he gets back and I go, oh, you look really handsome. And he goes, thanks. He just like, he's like this different person. And it makes him feel awesome. Like he feels really good about himself. And honestly, it looks great whenever he gets it done.
Starting point is 00:17:18 But he was complaining about the price? And so when, because he feels great, I go, why don't you just go and get it done more? Because what he does is then he, I say, cool, did you book another appointment? He goes, no, I'll book it when I need it. I'm like, but if you book it when you need it, it's already, it's too late. So then if you try and get a booking, and because he only goes to this one guy, if you can't get a booking for a week or two, then you're like a week
Starting point is 00:17:42 or two past when you needed it done. Yeah, it's like just book it in. And so I said to him, why don't you just every time you go there, you feel awesome, just say, cool, I'll take another three weeks and just every three weeks just keep booking back in. And he goes, oh, it's just really expensive. And I was like, bro, if it makes you feel really good, then the $60 to get your haircut and your beard trim like does he not know the number two rule of life though what don't talk about
Starting point is 00:18:11 fuck club no that's the first one yep that's not the first one what's number one never ever question or mention someone being pregnant unless you can physically see a baby coming out of them yep that is good advice. Oh, not long now, eh? What? Yeah. Don't do that. Don't do that.
Starting point is 00:18:28 Yeah, no, that's fair. Number two rule of life is if you're a man, never complain to a woman that getting your hair cut is expensive. They see you coming. Because no matter how much you're paying, you know that a female in your life is probably paying five times? I mean, yeah. Six times that?
Starting point is 00:18:50 I've definitely paid like $500, $600 to get my hair done before. And then this rizzed up bloke has the gall to rock up to you after you've paid ridiculous amounts of money for your fucking sexy as fuck hair. And then he comes in and goes, oh, $60 is a bit expensive. Fucking tell it to anyone else. But the thing is, I'm like, but it's $60 is a lot of money if it is a lot of money to you.
Starting point is 00:19:16 And that's not the problem. It's more just like, but $60 to feel awesome. Your partner drives an Audi. No, but it's just like if $60 is what it costs for you to feel great, like throw the $60 at someone to give you that feeling. Yeah. Like what, you know, it's almost like just inconsequential. You should work at the front desk at a brothel.
Starting point is 00:19:35 This is like. Yeah, I'm very good at this. But you know what I mean? Like. Throw the money. It feels great. Like just, but why wouldn't you? That's an investment into you feeling awesome
Starting point is 00:19:45 about yourself you know what i mean the same way that like getting your eyebrows done or your hair done or a fake tan or laser hair removal whatever it is i'm just like bro do the thing and he's like and he just like agonized over it i'm like but fucking it makes you feel awesome why wouldn't you just do it okay so and also great to look at. You know what I mean? Yeah, because I know that you get a bit like. Yeah. And some people have mentioned that when Torbs, when we're doing like a live stream at your house, for example. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:12 When Torbs like comes to say hi, you get a bit like giddy around him. Yeah. You get a bit nervous. Because I love him. I love him sick. He's a big hunk of spunk. But when he gets his hair cut. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:21 We all know about it at work because you come in like skipping and being like, oh, Dom's got his haircut. He's looking so good. He looks good, but he also just like is super confident whenever he's had it done. So I had a haircut last week. Yeah, and it looks fantastic. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:20:36 I'm glad someone mentioned it. Would you say my wrist is lifted? Oh, yeah. I don't think you really have any. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. At the start of the year, the three of us talked about what we wanted to do this year.
Starting point is 00:20:51 We all had different goals. Yeah. And mine was to get Riz. Yeah, and I don't think it's something you can obtain. I think you've got it or you don't. I don't have it either. I'm not hanging shit on you and being like, you don't have Riz because I don't have it.
Starting point is 00:21:03 I just don't have it. I just don't have it. I have not got it. I've got no game, no Riz, whatever you want to call it. So because my hair was actually getting a bit shaggy and a bit like. You wore a hat for the last couple of weeks because you were like, it's too long and you just didn't have time to go and get a car. You were busy. We had COVID.
Starting point is 00:21:21 And then I get the phone call going, hey, can you come do Channel 7 TV tomorrow? And I went, oh, I probably can't just chuck a hat on that, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Because, yeah, you're right, for the last few weeks, oh, new hat. And I'm like, yep.
Starting point is 00:21:32 Yeah, I had to buy this to cover myself up. Yeah, I'd rather buy a hat than go down the street. And so I go down to the barber shop. And because you've got many barbers, like depending on where you are in town, you've got one around the corner. There's two pretty close to where we're recording the podcast now. There's one.
Starting point is 00:21:52 In the city? In the city. And there's one in Altham. Yeah. So I was in Altham, so I was like, I'll go to the, you just rock up. Yeah. No booking required. Get a spare chair.
Starting point is 00:22:00 Yeah, and I jump in. Yeah. So then I jump in and then this guy walks in with what I'll describe as a posse. A posse? There were seven of them. Were they all hoping to get a walk in? No.
Starting point is 00:22:12 Oh. It was just this one guy. And talk about riz. Yeah. He was so cool and calm and collected. And in a lot of barbershops now they're like, hey, do you want a beer or do you want a drink? They do that a lot now.
Starting point is 00:22:25 Yeah. They always offer you a wine at the hairdresser. I can't do it. No. I can't do it. It makes me all tiddly and then I don't get what I want. So this one guy walks in and goes, oh, is there a spare chair? And they go, oh, yeah, just for you.
Starting point is 00:22:35 And he goes, yeah, yeah, just me. My friends are just here to hang. Because there's, you know, these beautiful old leather couches and there's whiskey and beer. It's that, like, third place thing. It's the third place. Yeah. And the guy who's at the barbershop has kind of, like, got this, like,
Starting point is 00:22:53 yeah, this is why we put the couches down. Oh, so the people that were working there were like, this is what we want. This is the environment we're trying to create. This kind of, like, you know, guys are just hanging out, having a drink, getting their beer done, like just a Saturday afternoon. Like this is what we want.
Starting point is 00:23:10 I like that. Yeah, and I love the theory of it. Yeah. Oh. So because you obviously didn't have your friends with you because Cam and I were busy. I was posse-less. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:22 And so I'm sitting there with a water and the guy goes, oh, do you and your mates want a beer? And he goes, you know what? It's a special day. Can we maybe go up on the shelf above and do a whiskey? And the guy goes, yeah, on the rocks or straight up? And he goes, yeah, on the rocks. We'll get seven.
Starting point is 00:23:42 Oh, well, I mean, that's taken the piss. Oh, I think they might add it into the charge or whatever. Because one drink because you're paying for your haircut. But, oh, I brought 20 of my closest mates with me. You know what I mean? Oh, he was happy to have it. Did they get hustled? I think sometimes when they offer you a beer, it's like, yeah,
Starting point is 00:24:00 but if you have a few, they just add it to the bill. But one is different to. I'm not like, I'm just like, oh, they just add it to the bill. But one is different to... I'm not like, I'm just like, oh, is this what they were doing? Oh, but for all I know, he was like, yep, one haircut, one beard trim and six whiskeys. Yeah, yeah. But you're right, maybe this is a swindle. Do you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:24:17 No, the guy was way too happy to have him in there for it to be a swindle. But sometimes you let your inhibitions fly when you feel like it's a good vibe. Yeah, and they're all gassed up and everyone's feeling good. And he's like, yeah, whiskey's on me because everyone's having a good time. Yep. Anyway. Maybe. But it changed the environment of the whole place.
Starting point is 00:24:35 Yeah, but you didn't like it. Is it fair to say that you never look uglier than when you're sitting in the barber's chair and you can see all your fucking chins and your face never looks fatter and your hair's like wet and pushed down and you just look like a troll. And you just look like a fat little worm. Yeah, like a thumb. A thumb with a cape around it. It's awful.
Starting point is 00:24:55 I was sitting there like a thumbed cape. No, a caped thumb. And might I just add the posse. They all looked cool. They didn't have their cape on. Two guys, not like ridiculously like stupidly jacked, but just in real good shape. And like, you know how those guys wear like a tight chino,
Starting point is 00:25:22 like a tight pant? Like a trouser. Yeah, like a tight trouser, but then with just like a T chino, like a tight pant. Like a trouser. Yeah, like a tight trouser, but then with just like a T-shirt on, like a white T on top with a tight trouser. Yeah, and the sleeves on the T-shirt always cuff. Yep. And one of them had a little dumpy. I thought that.
Starting point is 00:25:44 So that was two of them. Hot, yep. Did I have tattoos have tattoos one of them did that's a bit of me that's a bit of me yep two of the other guys had clearly been like maybe not fully at the gym but it was like a saturday athletic wear but again like a loose basketball short or something is that what you're talking about? Yeah, but like wearing it well or carrying it well. Yeah. So like when I wear active wear in public, I look like I've been moving house.
Starting point is 00:26:14 Yes. But like when Steph Clare Smith wears it, it looks like a choice. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, I can't pull off the choice. It looks like I've just, yeah, been moving house or something. So they look great. And then the other two were, now this sounds creepy because I'm not like one,
Starting point is 00:26:27 but just two beautiful girls. Yeah, right. And one of them was clearly, I assume, the girlfriend of the partner of the one getting the haircut. Yep. And she was like, oh, get him to do the short side with the beard. You look so fucking hot when you do that. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:26:43 Do they want to be friends with us? Can they be? Do you think they're interested? Probably not, eh? Probably not, no. And the other girl, stunning, and they're just all having a great time, having a chat, and they're just like having a whiskey. And they're just chill as.
Starting point is 00:26:57 Just chill as. And so here's my thing. If I had known that these guys were coming to hang, I would have gone to a different barber to prepare myself for this barber. Yes. Because I want to put my best foot forward. Like when you clean your house before the cleaner comes. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:27:10 Yes. Exactly. And instead of me going, oh, fuck, I'm on the tally tomorrow, I better fall out of bed into the car to drive to the barber and be wearing some like track pants short things. You know, the pink ones? Yes. That are like a dusty pink.
Starting point is 00:27:25 I know the ones you're talking about, yeah. Yeah, and then this like oversized T-shirt that doesn't quite fit me that well. They probably thought you looked cool. But that's the thing, they didn't. No, they probably did. And I looked like a caped thumb. Yeah, the caped thumb, that's a hard look to pull off. And I'm just like, fuck, you guys are cool.
Starting point is 00:27:42 Yeah. How do you get that? How do you get that easy, effortless, chic, cool vibe? Do they sell that? Where do you get it? I'll tell you how you don't get it. Asking for it. What I'm doing right now.
Starting point is 00:27:55 Have a look at my bank account. How much? Because we're like self-employed, so I, you know, like we have to send ourselves money from the business account to pay our personal bill. Have a look how much is in my account. Am I allowed to say? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:10 $6? Yeah. And I've got the money, but it's just in the business account. I haven't moved across. Yeah. So I tell you how not to look cool in front of the fucking. Your card fucking declined. Do you know what I would have done?
Starting point is 00:28:22 Ask for the scissors, stab myself in the neck. Right in the neck. Right in the neck. Right in the neck. Just to create a diversion. Well, you're still the diversion, though. Or maybe you just throw them the car keys and go, keep that, see ya. I'm out of here.
Starting point is 00:28:38 You can have my car. And they went, pfft. I don't want my car. Full-size man in a small-size hatchback. I, wow. If there's one way to not look cool, it's your car declining. Oh, and then did you have to do the, oh, well, the money. I have the money, but it's just in the business account.
Starting point is 00:28:58 To be honest, I actually owe the business $60 because I had to use the business card because I was like, I don't want to do the transfer thing, and then I was nervous, and it was a weekend, and I'm like, oh, does it clear straight away? So I just used the business card. Probably should have mentioned that earlier. We'll talk about that. That's okay. That's all right.
Starting point is 00:29:13 I was trying to look cool in front of the hotties. No, that's what I would have done the same. Okay. Yeah, I would have done the same. Let's do We Love To See and get the fuck out of here. Thank you for being supportive, though. Oh, I'm sorry about that. You know what? Next time that happens, call me. I'll come down. I'll get the fuck out of here. Thank you for being supportive, though. Oh, I'm sorry about that. You know what?
Starting point is 00:29:25 Next time that happens, call me. I'll come down. I'll be your posse. Anytime, the day or night, you need a posse, I'll be there. Thank you. Thank you. Yep. And Torbjorn's just gotten his hair cut, so he would have looked cool.
Starting point is 00:29:33 He would have looked cool. Yeah. Maybe he was one of the other guys. Maybe. He's the guy with the riz. Yeah. My love to see it is this tweet that I saw. Abby Norman Says posted it, and it says,
Starting point is 00:29:44 My husband gives people the thumbs down instead of flicking them off in the car. I also saw this. He reports that the thumbs down makes people even more mad. Imagine someone pulls out in front of you and you go, bad choice, bro.
Starting point is 00:30:00 You know? Because the finger's aggressive, the thumb is just like, you're shit. Yeah, it's just like, think about yourself. I reckon that makes you, that's going just like, you're shit. Yeah, it's just like, think about yourself. I reckon that makes you, that's going for the 3am wake up. Yeah. That's the, wow, I shouldn't have pulled out on that guy. Whereas someone that just like flicks you off, you go, oh, fuck you. Fuck you, right back.
Starting point is 00:30:16 You were wrong, blah, blah, blah. But the thumbs down, that makes you, that's a thinker. Yeah. And I just love to, I love to see that. And I thought, I'm going to keep that in the back pocket for sure. Yeah. For sure. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:27 Because you're a middle finger thrower. You love to give the bird. No, I don't do that. I do this. To everyone in the office. Oh, yeah. In the office. Yeah, I do.
Starting point is 00:30:35 In the car, though, I just do this. Yeah, you're pretty aggressive in the car. Would you incorporate into your personal life a bit of a thumbs down? Maybe. Maybe I'll try it on and see how it goes. Because, like I said, you love giving me the bird. I do. And it's quite fun. Would you incorporate into your personal life a bit of a thumbs down? Maybe. Maybe I'll try it on and see how it goes. Because, like I said, you love giving me the bird. I do.
Starting point is 00:30:49 And it's quite funny. And I like catching you out and I'll be like, oh, hey, Ryan, what did you want? And then when you look at me like I'm holding a finger up, that's a classic. It is. So maybe try a thumbs down and we'll know firsthand. Or maybe if you go, if you say something and I go, you know,
Starting point is 00:31:04 and then do the thumbs down. Oh, that hurt already. Yeah. And you didn't. That hurt already. Yeah. And you didn't even say an idea. Yeah. Anyway, yeah, I'll keep that in me arsenal and I'll let you know how I go. In me arsenal. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:31:13 Tapa Sherry. Hi, Sherry. Said, my love. Oh, what are you going to Sherry today? Sorry? Yep. For those playing along at home, Tony has just received four thumbs down from Cam and I.
Starting point is 00:31:29 And fuck, that felt good, didn't it, Cam? It felt terrible for me. It's definitely going into the rotation. That was wonderful. Just how quick you both were. That was amazing. That was so good. That makes up for the whole barber thing now. Okay, great.
Starting point is 00:31:40 Maybe I should have given them the thumbs down. So they all walk in and they're feeling really good and you go, That would have fucking sent them. So they all walk in and they're feeling really good and you go, ugh. That would have fucking sent them. Anyway, all right. Sherry. I've just been shown the door.
Starting point is 00:31:51 That was interesting. Stop it, Sherry. That's made my day. That's changed the whole, I'll go to the barber seven times again just to experience the high that I just felt doing that. Sherry, my love to see it at the moment is my husband and I are expecting we are 32 weeks pregnant. Wow. Congratulations. 32 weeks pregnant. Wow.
Starting point is 00:32:05 Congratulations. That's awesome. I got home from work, says Sherry, and I busted my husband practicing with the pram. Is that not the most adorable thing you've ever heard? That is awesome. So she gets in and he's just like wheeling it around the lounge, being like, you know, oh, yep, just testing, you know,
Starting point is 00:32:22 driving around to the left. Oh, yep. And then he's like kind of like talking to her and practising and stuff. That's very sweet. That's the cutest fucking thing I've ever heard. That is really sweet. And wouldn't that just make you feel really good about the person you'd chosen as your partner as well?
Starting point is 00:32:34 He's cute. You'd go, oh, you're pumped about this, we're feeling excited, you know, we're getting close now. That would be an amazing feeling. You know my partner, Bridget? Yes. Do you think she would find this cute or fucking annoying? I think she'd probably be annoyed by that. Well I haven't said the thing yet.
Starting point is 00:32:48 Oh okay. I just assumed it was you. I was going to say by default if I got BJ our dog and put him in the pram and then like wheeled it around the house. She'd be annoyed by that. I was right
Starting point is 00:33:04 with my initial reaction. It was correct. Yep. Do you know what she would do if she saw you doing that? Big thumbs down. Enthusiastic thumbs down. All right, we'll see you tomorrow. I love every single one of you, especially Tony.
Starting point is 00:33:18 Love you. Love you. Aw. Love you, bye. Yeah, thumbs up. Thumbs up, yes. Thumbs up. I was like, give me a thumbs down, me now. Nah, I'll put my thumb up, yeah. Sorry, love you bye yeah thumbs up yes thumbs up I was like a few thumbs down
Starting point is 00:33:25 nah I'll put my thumb up yeah sorry love you bye

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