Toni and Ryan - The Devil's Lettuce

Episode Date: August 4, 2022

NOT THE WHACKY TOBACKY!!!! And your best food meltdowns, and a hollandaise update! Love you lots and lots hehehehe Toni xxx Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our... Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 So Caitlin's in Adelaide, which is a different time zone. To us here in Melbourne. Hello? Caitlin, it's Tony and Ryan. Oh, my God, hello. Hi. Are you in the bathroom? Yeah, I was in the shower.
Starting point is 00:00:20 Oh. What are you wearing? Nothing. Well, can you do us two favours? Would you be able to put some pants on and approve this podcast? I don't think I'll have time, but I can definitely approve the podcast. Hey, it's Caitlin from Adelaide and I approve this podcast. Hi.
Starting point is 00:00:56 Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. Welcome. I'm Tony. I'm going first. You're going first. Yeah, I'm Tony. Happy Monday. I'm fucking pumped.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Beginning of the new week. We're in a new studio. I feel like nothing can take me down. Is that putting pressure on yourself by saying that? Nah, because it can't. And even if it does, we're all learning and we all love each other and this is a safe space. My name is Ryan. I'm the vice captain of the ship.
Starting point is 00:01:16 Just here to support Tony. And I'm just loving that you're feeling up and about in our new place. Thanks. Don't you feel good? I do feel good. And I like that you're up and about because you made sort of a confession that you had a tough spot last week because you were wanting some Hollandaise sauce, you wanted Eggs Benedict,
Starting point is 00:01:34 you had a big craving, you went to a place, they didn't have it. And I think we all understand when you just want that one thing. You just know the taste you need in your mouth. Yeah. Yeah. And you shed a few tears later in the day. Yeah, I did. And in the podcast last week, I said, I haven't cried yet. And a lot of people related to that. So if you need to cry, let it out, girlfriend. Well, we are here for you right now. I said, please share your food meltdowns. Yes. It may seem irrational and illogical,
Starting point is 00:02:01 but you know what? We're here for you. I'm supporting you. And if you've had a meltdown like Tony did last week, she's bounced back. You can bounce back too. Life gets better is what I'd like to tell people. Let's get straight into this. Amelia said when I was pregnant. A meow-lia. Sorry, a meow-lia.
Starting point is 00:02:19 When I was pregnant, she doesn't say I needed it, my mouth needed popcorn chicken from KFC with supercharged sauce inside it. Can we take a moment for popcorn chicken from KFC? It is so fucking good. Your thoughts on the supercharged sauce? I like a supercharged sauce. I think I prefer more of a sriracha, spicy taste though.
Starting point is 00:02:49 So the supercharged sauce, I do like it when I'm at KFC. But if I'm having KFC at home, I'll normally use sriracha instead. Yeah. BYO condo. We're in the new studio. The KFC is like literally just down there. Please don't tell me that. It's probably a little bit too close.
Starting point is 00:03:04 There's a Red Rooster there as well. There is too. Amelia says, I literally cried the whole way home and I ate the popcorn chicken without the sauce choking through my tears. So they didn't have the supercharged sauce? Yeah, no good. So she got the popcorn chicken but no sauce. Oh, that's a fucking –
Starting point is 00:03:22 If I went to Macca's and got nuggets and they're like, we don't have sweet and sour sauce, I'm like, we'll take your nuggets back, bro. I'm not interested. Refund my card, please. I continued to cry for two hours, says Amelia, over KFC sauce. How much did it hurt my soul? Seven years later, I'm still telling this story quite regularly.
Starting point is 00:03:40 I think sometimes – when you get burned, sometimes you just cannot fucking come back from it. So I'm here for you, Shamilia, because no, not Shamilia, Amelia, because I'm actually just there with you in the trauma because I feel the same way. I haven't lived in WA for five years and I'm still thinking about this fucking dome. So Amelia was pregnant at the time. Do you think she now sees that kid and goes, oh, you gave me those cravings and just blames the kid?
Starting point is 00:04:10 Maybe her and the kid have shared trauma because maybe the baby wanted the supercharged sauce. Yes. So Amelia and the child are both like, remember that time? The baby's like, yes. I woke up not dependent on supercharged sauce and I wanted to be. Elise said, have I cried over food before? Absolutely and fairly regularly.
Starting point is 00:04:30 I have Butterfingers and my whole life I've been dropping stuff, spilling stuff. Oh, like clumsy. Yeah, clumsy. I thought, because isn't Butterfinger like actually a food in the US? Yeah, gotcha, yeah. So I was like, lots of candy bars. No, no, Butterfingers, yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:46 The worst was having the arse fall out of two charcoal chicken bags, resulting in the chicken and the chicken juices going onto my pants and the supermarket floor. That is gross. Hang on. She's still at the supermarket? Can she buy another chook? I would assume so.
Starting point is 00:05:06 Well, that's good news. That's good news. Do you know what's worse is when you get home and then it happens in the car park at home? Yeah. Because that's happened to me before. With the chicken. Not with the charcoal chicken.
Starting point is 00:05:16 My sister Libby is a really good baker. Like she's really fucking good at cooking. Yep. But she is like dairy intolerant so she actually loves to bake but she can't eat any of it it like makes her like quite sick and like doesn't agree with it that she still like loves to so she loves like the thing of baking and sitting down and like enjoying it and then like cooking for other people that makes her really happy but anyway so she got super into baking and she made like a massive custard tart like you know
Starting point is 00:05:45 when you get a custard tart and they're like a single serve she made like a full pie size one and mum and i this is years and years and years ago mum and i went to her house for dinner and then she was like oh and i made some dessert and she made a custard tart and like the five of us like whoever of us was there we polished the tart off and then I was like, fuck, I could go another – I wish I could just live with that forever. And then she goes, I made you and mum a separate one. To take home. To take home.
Starting point is 00:06:12 And so mum and I are in the car on the way home like, oh, I'll probably have a little slither of that when we get home. And I'm like guarding it with my life. And then I get out of the car in the driveway and mum goes, do you want to pass me the tart? Do you want to close the gate? And I hand mum the tart and it smashes, she drops it and it smashes all over the floor. Was it her fault or yours?
Starting point is 00:06:31 Yeah, it was mum's fault. You sure? Yeah, well, she can't fucking defend herself, can she? I was going to say, very easy to blame the person that can't talk back. But, yeah, so I understand when you know you can't get a replacement. Yeah. What do you think about, obviously, the replacements there in the supermarket, but the shame and embarrassment of doing it in front of many other people?
Starting point is 00:06:49 That's a good point, actually. And especially if you cry in the supermarket. Yeah. Yeah, because people are like, fuck, she's had a bad day. She's had a fucking day, hasn't she? She's crying. Should we go and help her? I can steer clear, actually.
Starting point is 00:07:02 Yeah, that's the thing. People would be like, I don't think. That fucking chicken bag. Oh, she's not having a right would be like, I don't think. That fucking chicken peck. Oh, she's not having. Last time I come to Aldi in Abbotsford. Did you see that girl around the back giving handjobs, though? Look like Tony Love. How about them chickens, though?
Starting point is 00:07:18 Not sure which one of those two things smelt worse. Yeah, lick her land. That was the worst from Elise. She says the most recent, though, was six hours ago. Oh, my love. Somehow opening my lunchbox in the work office caused my entire content of my lunch to be flung across the work kitchen and onto the floor at work. And then everyone's like, oh, sweetie, do you want me to, like,
Starting point is 00:07:41 get you Uber Eats? You know, like that sympathy, like, I'll get you something. And she's like, I just wanted my lunch. It's always the worst when you bring your lunch as well because you feel superior. It's like in the morning if you've woken up and like had a shower, done a workout, you feel like invincible for the rest of the day and you're like, I'm better than you because I exercised this morning.
Starting point is 00:08:01 I feel that way when I bring work lunch, like when I rock up to work. I almost rolled in today with a work lunch. Did you? I didn't, but it was some leftovers from last night, and I thought how superior am I going to feel when I roll in and just be like, oh, got some pasta and prawns here from last night. Well, I felt pretty good this morning when you were like, oh, do you want a coffee or some breakfast?
Starting point is 00:08:18 And I was like, I had a coffee and breakfast before I left the house. I felt pretty good about that. Yeah. So my bar's pretty low. Pretty low. Zarez. Sorry if I haven't nailed your name there, Zarez, but felt pretty good about that. Yeah. So my bar's pretty low. Pretty low. Zarez. Sorry if I haven't nailed your name there, Zarez, but I'm sticking with it.
Starting point is 00:08:30 Back it in. Ten years ago, I got hired before going to the movies. And, I mean, what a choice that is. Got hired? High. Oh, like smoked drugs. Smoked a bit of, yeah. Oh, the devil's lettuce.
Starting point is 00:08:42 The devil's lettuce. Jazz cabbage. Wacky tobacco. And imagine going to see, they were seeing a wacky comedy. The Green Goblin. Is there any more? Or should I push up with the story? No, no, you go.
Starting point is 00:09:02 Played the devil's flute. Is that one? I don Is that what it sounds like? I don't know. I just made that up. They got high before going to the movies. Yep. And do you think that's a nice touch if it's a wacky comedy that you're like, I'm a bit high, I'm going to giggle and just go to the movies
Starting point is 00:09:16 and eat a ton of popcorn and live my best life. Yeah. And I'm guessing that they were, what, 18 or something. Yeah. We went to get burgers afterwards. Nice. And my high, dumb ass started crying at the burger place because I asked the cashier,
Starting point is 00:09:31 can I just get a cheeseburger but with no cheese? And they're like, oh, yeah, so like a hamburger, no problem. And he's like, no, no, no, no. I need a cheeseburger with no cheese. And they're like, yeah, no worries, man. That's actually the hamburger. It's a bit cheaper, so we'll take care of it. And they're like, no. And he just couldn't That's actually the hamburger. It's a bit cheaper. So we'll take care of it. And they're like, no.
Starting point is 00:09:46 And he just couldn't like. Couldn't confuse that it was the same thing. And he got upset and he didn't mean to cause a scene, but he felt like a scene had been caused. I was mortified the next day when I realised that a cheeseburger without cheese is in fact just a hamburger. And they were offering me the exact same thing that I was asking for. Yep.
Starting point is 00:10:09 But I still made a scene and I was that difficult customer and everyone doesn't like difficult customers and I just feel mortified that in my high state, I was that annoying customer. Well, this is just a cautionary tale for mixing around with bloody the devil's lettuce, the jazz cabbage, the wacky shabacky. Years later. Oh.
Starting point is 00:10:29 I've still never let myself go back to my favourite old burger place near the theatre in Sacramento. Oh. Zarez, I feel for you. If we ever make it to Sacramento, we'll take you there. And make them face their trauma. No, and oh, I was going to say like make it better. Oh. Oh, no, maybe we could get takeaway. We'll bring it I was going to say, like, make it better. Oh.
Starting point is 00:10:45 Oh, no. Maybe we could get takeaway. We'll bring it home for you. Yeah, we'll bring it over. We'll bring it over. And final story. Oh. This is making me so hungry, by the way.
Starting point is 00:10:53 Same. I'm starving. This is from a five-year-old little Ryan John Dunn in Eltham. Oh. It was a hot summer's day. And I heard a rumour from Rick Samarges who went to my school. Oh, he sounds like a fuckhead.
Starting point is 00:11:07 He's a nice guy actually. Okay, he sounds great. I love Rick. We met up last week. He said that Mr Whippy was out the front of his place the other day and, you know, in the summer months it kind of makes its way around and I started to think if I went to Rick's place, like just knowing where the roads are, he was a bit closer to town,
Starting point is 00:11:24 I was a bit further. It's probably the next day or so it's probably going to come out my way. So I reckon for probably two or three days I was like, had an ear out to hear that sound, which sounds like Tony. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Oh, is that Mr Whippy? Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Oh, it is too.
Starting point is 00:11:41 You've nailed that. So I finally hear the sound. How old were you? Probably five or six. Yeah, early to mid-primary school. A hard age, yep. I hear the sound. And I've been counting.
Starting point is 00:11:56 I've been saving my pocket money, counting little bits and pieces. So I run out there with a handful of coins. Hey, mister, can I get the chocolate ice cream with the sprinkles? You know, like they dunk it in sprinkles. Did you have a beard then as well? Yeah. Yeah. And you know how they dunk it in sprinkles?
Starting point is 00:12:10 Yeah. When they do the thing? Yeah. So they dunked it in sprinkles and I never had that before and I've been waiting for days. And then I'm walking back from- And you spent all your pocket money on it? Yep.
Starting point is 00:12:20 It was $1.70, I remember. And then I held it in my hand and I was walking back to our house, but it starts to drip down my hand. You've got to start licking immediately. And then I realised I can't wait to get home. I need to start eating this now. Yeah, you need to start licking straight away. That's what I say to all my boyfriends.
Starting point is 00:12:39 I've always said that. I've been pro-lick from the beginning. You can quote me on that. Yeah, put that on a T-shirt. Start licking straight away, Tony Lodge 2022. So I go to like poke my little seven-year-old tongue out at the ice cream. Oh, fuck. Let's grab it.
Starting point is 00:12:53 Yep. And instead of licking the bit that was dripping, I just pushed the ice cream and it fell off the cone. You know how sometimes it's not like in the cone, it's like sitting on top of it? And it fell down and I burst into tears and I ran home and all I was doing was just holding the... The empty cone.
Starting point is 00:13:09 The cone. And then I sort of like started eating the cone a little bit and then I got inside and there was like the tiny bit of cone left and mum was like, oh, you ate it fast. And I was like, and that's when I fully, because you know how you try to hold it together. You're like, I just got to get home. 100%.
Starting point is 00:13:22 I'm tearing. Every day. Then I finally get in. Mum said that and I just melted down. Like the ice cream just did in my hand. I was going to say, yeah, don't say melted. And I was distraught. And mum's like, we'll go get you another one. We can go to the store.
Starting point is 00:13:36 And I was like, I don't want another one. I wanted that one. Rick Simard just said he got the sprinkles and the thing and I just wanted the sprinkles and the thing. Not the first time I've heard about him today. He's a nice guy. And now, 26, 25, a fucking decades later, I'm still distraught and I never have got sprinkles and chocolate from Mr. Whoopie since.
Starting point is 00:14:01 Have you had a Mr. Whoopie since? No. Because you're like. And to this day, Mr. Whoopie Sins? No. Because you're like... And to this day, have we ever had ice cream together? No, actually. I don't think so. I still... You know how they're like, there's a cones, but you can get a little cup?
Starting point is 00:14:14 No, you've got to go to the cup. I've never coned. Yeah. Like Zarez. Never cone again. Never cone again. Oh, I think he was coning. That was the problem.
Starting point is 00:14:22 He had too many cones. Hey, it's Kaylin from Adelaide, and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca
Starting point is 00:15:01 A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. We make a lot of exclusive content for our Patreon, like my blog. From the desk of Dr Tony Lodge. Yes, that is right. You can vote on the movies that we watch, which we're about to talk about now. And what else do we do? Oh, we've got live streams for Champion Tapas.
Starting point is 00:15:20 A few of the Champion Tapas that have seen those. Zach, your favourite Vegas showgirl, Tyler. Really? Thanks, Zach. Rebecca Schaefer, Emily Wood, thank you so much. Jason Wilkerson, Jesse Martin, Elvira Wiss, Jameetha Dodson, Katie Mitchell, thank you so much. Ashley Flores, Justin Jacobs and Emily Jackson.
Starting point is 00:15:39 Fucking love you. Thank you so much. And while we're saying thank you to people who listen to this podcast, last week you were discussing the fact that you had a craving for Dome and the Hollandaise sauce. So this is where the food meltdowns kind of stemmed from. I really wanted a very specific food in my mouth. Couldn't find it.
Starting point is 00:15:59 Didn't have it. It exists at Dome in WA, which is like a chain of cafes. It's not very good, but it is very consistent. Would you say that people supported you and they feel you and the love for Dome was real? They did. Hayley Noodle said, how fucking good is Dome? It's the only thing I miss from WA.
Starting point is 00:16:16 Probably a bit harsh on WA, but I get it. And Ollie Pote, he said, I'm from Sydney, but my family's from Perth. I go to Dome every time I visit. It's superior. Mark Frederick said, guys, I'm from Sydney, but my family's from Perth. I go to Dome every time I visit. It's superior. Mark Frederick said, guys, I want to give you a bit of intel because he felt like there was a bit of, are we going to Perth to get a Benedict action?
Starting point is 00:16:34 Which I would. There's a Dome in Hobart. It's a much shorter flight from Melbourne to save you going all the way to Perth. Just thought I'd let you guys know. Mark, that's some great intel. I called them in Hobart. It's closed. What?
Starting point is 00:16:50 Yeah, I called them. You know how I planned a week off for later in the year? Yeah. Me and Bridge were going to Hobart and I'd already booked in a dome trip. As in going, oh, we'll have to go. Well, I called them. I looked online and it says it's shut. Like shut for the day?
Starting point is 00:17:05 No, like that it's been shut for two years. Torbz did a bit of research. Well, Mark Fredericks, Lyft, mate. Okay, no. Up-to-date information. Maybe I've got the wrong intel. But let's have a look at that because if it is, we're fucking jumping on the ferry and we're going to Dome.
Starting point is 00:17:19 But have I seen you've made a purchase? Okay, so everybody was getting around me in the comments, which thank you so much. I really needed the support from all of the tapas in our Facebook group. If you would like to also support me at any point, you may join our Facebook group. It's our Tony and Ryan podcast on Facebook. And if anyone wants to hunt down some supercharged sauce
Starting point is 00:17:38 for Amelia seven years ago, send that through as well. Yeah, it's seven years too late though, mate. But the answer to my prayers, Rebecca Thompson commented, and she said, apparently this is the brand of hollandaise sauce they use at Dome. Happy hollandaise is what she said, which is very cute. Great intel once again. I said to Torbs, I can't believe that they use hollandaise from a tub.
Starting point is 00:18:02 That's just not possible, right? You have been to Dome though, right? And then Torbs goes, what's the thing that you like about Dome? And I was like, I love the hollandaise. He goes, nah. I was like, I love the espressos. And he goes, nah. And I was like, it's always consistent.
Starting point is 00:18:18 You love the consistency. That's what we said. We got on our horse about consistency. And how do you keep it consistent? Do you get every chef in all the different places to make their own or do you get a pre-made consistent thick hollandaise sauce? It is $15 for a litre. And they'll charge us $25 for a scoop of it.
Starting point is 00:18:38 No wonder Dome's doing all right. The markup on this hollandaise. You'd think they could fucking open up over it. Or stay open in Hobart. Mark up on his hollandaise. You'd think they could fucking open up over it. Yeah. Or stay open in Hobart. $15 for a litre, which was the smallest quantity I could buy.
Starting point is 00:18:50 I was going to say, a litre is a lot. I was expecting a jar of like 80 mils. No, no, no, no. It's a litre. It was $15. They've had that for five years. $11 shipping. So it was like $26, but I've ordered it.
Starting point is 00:19:03 Purchase. Yeah, great. Price is no issue. Oh, my God. Yeah. I'd fucking pay $100 for that I've ordered it. Yeah, great. The price is no issue. Oh, my God. Yeah. I'd fucking pay $100 for that hollandaise if I had to. A leader, though. That'll fucking last you a lifetime.
Starting point is 00:19:11 It's on the way from Amazon. Well, it probably hasn't been. If you open it, you have to use it within five days. Everyone come round to Tony's. If anyone wants some eggs, bring your own bread. We'll supply the sauce. Torbs is poaching eggs like they're going out of fucking fashion um but yeah so i'm fucking so excited so i will update everybody when i try the sauce because
Starting point is 00:19:31 it is just the exact taste i need in my mouth and it's what made me how to fucking mount mate it's what make are you okay so i'm so excited about the holidays it's what made me have a melt down and i can't fucking wait to try i'm so excited not that you. It's what made me have a meltdown and I can't fucking wait to try it. I'm so excited. Not that you need a reason to be in a good mood, but you've come in warm today. You've come in hot. You reckon. Mate, if I knew I had a liter of holidays on the way,
Starting point is 00:19:54 try and shut me up. So thank you to everyone for getting around Tony. Yeah, I really – I needed the love around that. Yeah. So thank you. You know, a few weeks ago when there was a few posts in the Facebook group that was like, oh, how good's Ryan? And people were commenting on it.
Starting point is 00:20:11 Bridget goes, oh, that's a bit weird, isn't it? And I was like, I needed a few of those today. Sometimes you do need a boost. Need a pump up. Well, mate, I'll be able to boost you up with me fucking later holidays. Mate, I will be A, excited, but B, you've got two bathrooms in your house. Oh, yeah. Required.
Starting point is 00:20:30 Yeah, yeah, be careful. You and Torbs can share one. I'll take care of the other one. Why do we have to share? Mate, I'm supplying the H. That's true. The gear. I'll share with John out in the courtyard.
Starting point is 00:20:42 Every week the Tarpers choose a movie for us to watch and this week we set the challenge of we've – have you also never seen Indiana Jones? No. So the reason we suggested watching Indiana Jones is because we watched Chicken Run last week and there's a scene where she does the like grabbing her hat from out, from under the gate at the last second,
Starting point is 00:21:03 which is like obviously an homage to Indiana Jones. So I'd never seen it. Which we both didn't get because we hadn't seen it. Yeah. Well, I was just like, that's from that thing, eh? And Toulouse was like, yep. So unimpressed. I'm like, mate, the holiday's on its way.
Starting point is 00:21:15 Chill out. Chill out. Get some bread. So we decided we should watch Indiana Jones. We put like the first four up in the post, but then obviously, thankfully, everyone picked the first one. Also, I know I've brought this up before and I will continue to bring it up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:28 What is movies' obsession with thinking that we go to bars to, like, have a shot contest? You know when he meets the girl in Nepal? Yes. And she's, like, in the bar and it's, like, her and a tough guy and it's, like, that doesn't happen. Does that happen? It doesn't happen.
Starting point is 00:21:41 I've never done it. I've never seen it. Yep. What's it called? A shots off? I couldn't even tell you. I've only seen it in movies and that's what they call it. I just can't think of anything worse.
Starting point is 00:21:52 You'd be full of liquid. You wouldn't even be able to fit in a kebab afterwards. No, and what's the point? You'd just be so drunk. It would cost a fortune. Has anyone tried to drink, like pay for a shot in a bar? They charge it like a bottle of liquor is like $35, right? But they'll charge $15 for a shot.
Starting point is 00:22:08 Yeah. Are you paying for the bottle or are you paying per shot? Because like you said. It would add up. If you were doing it at home. Should we do a shot off of the hollandaise? We'll die. Our hearts will stop.
Starting point is 00:22:21 Go back and forth until someone quits and dies. Could we get some? So what if we did it instead of like fondue? We did it. It was just hollandaise and we like dipped bits of bread or chicken nuggets or something in there. A hollandaise fondue. That actually sounds fucking delicious.
Starting point is 00:22:34 Yeah. Happy hollandaise. I mean, don't tell your doctor or cardiologist. Yeah. That does sound like that. Or my thighs. Sorry, that sounded like something that someone on Facebook would say. My thighs.
Starting point is 00:22:47 Anyway, so we watched Indiana Jones for the first time. Do you know what's crazy? It's been remastered. So it came out in like the 80s. It's been remastered. It looks pretty good. No fucking CGI back then. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:01 So all that stuff, like the boulder and stuff, they would have actually had to roll it all down. So when the guy walks into the propeller, you know, the big strong guy, because there's no CGI, he actually died. Yeah. So sad. Yeah, it's a real shame. It was tough though.
Starting point is 00:23:16 How funny is the old-fashioned tough guy? Yeah, and beating up with like the rolling the arms around. A lot more Nazis than I was expecting. Same. I wasn't expecting that. I didn't expect there to be like a, it's for Hitler kind of. No. And I was like, oh, righto.
Starting point is 00:23:32 We're going straight in there, are we? Yeah. That really surprised, like, but I didn't know the story. And to be honest, I don't think I was really expecting a story. What were you expecting? Like just action. Yeah. There is a lot of action though.
Starting point is 00:23:47 But I was like, oh, there's actually kind of like a flowing thing. Can I tell you something that Indiana Jones and I have in common? I mean obviously a lot because, you know, just two brute men. Yeah. Peak physical condition. Yeah. Harrison Ford. He like still looks like that now.
Starting point is 00:24:02 He does, doesn't he? Yeah. I don't like snakes. Yep. And when he escapes in the first scene and he escapes all over, I'm like, hey, that's fine. Then he gets into the aeroplane and I was like, oh, snakes on a plane. Nice.
Starting point is 00:24:17 I'm sick of snakes. Yeah, I would have jumped out of the plane. Really? Yeah, and then later in the thing he's in the hole. Yeah, in the pit and it's all snakes. Yeah, and I was like, nah, like I can't. Well, I love that. That's like a thing.
Starting point is 00:24:30 Oh, no, no, I wouldn't do that to you. Don't ever surprise me with a snake. I wouldn't do that to you. First of all, we're not that show, but also like just don't fucking do it. Nah, I'm not a fan of snakes, obviously. But when I was a kid, have I ever told you about when there was a snake in my bedroom? No. Was it, did you call it um Robert Pattinson no nice because you guys are dating weren't you we were dating yeah I dated Robert Pattinson yeah it was actually MSN huh did you meet him no
Starting point is 00:24:56 trouser snake um but yeah there was a snake in my room once and um it was so terrifying yeah understandable anyway but like at the beginning of the movie when he says, like, I hate snakes, you're like, oh, more snake stuff is obviously coming. Yeah. But, I mean, it was pretty creepy. But were they real snakes, do you think? Nah. Nah.
Starting point is 00:25:16 Nah, that's crazy. Did you? Nah. Nah. I mean, maybe there was no CGI. I mean, how did they get them in there? Well, yeah. or maybe rubber snakes but they were moving though
Starting point is 00:25:27 yeah can I google this I'm actually gonna google it no you go were they real snakes in Indiana Jones the well of soul scene required around 7000 snakes
Starting point is 00:25:44 what the fuck? Oh, my God, no, they were real fucking snakes. The only venomous snakes were the cobras and one crew member was bitten on set by a python. Holy fuck. Fuck off. 7,000 real snakes. Oh, my God, at least all those snakes got work.
Starting point is 00:26:01 Yeah, I mean, what are they doing now? Yeah, I know, probably bloody doing heroin in a dumpster somewhere. Washed up actors. Waiting tables. I used to be in Ferris and Ford. I don't care, mate. Get me my holidays. Ferris and Ford?
Starting point is 00:26:16 He's like, yeah, I haven't seen that guy in years. He's got like a cigarette. It's a snake. One of them went on to be Anaconda. Left everyone else in the past. One of them's the snake One of them went on to be anaconda Left everyone else in the past One of them's the snake from Harry Potter The basilisk Where's he now?
Starting point is 00:26:39 He's doing that new movie with Samuel L Jackson On a plane, I think. Some are getting work with magicians. Hating it. It's a tough life. It is hard. Some are handbags now, which is sad. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:26:56 Some are working with the Irwins at Australia Zoo. One of them was actually the model for Alan's lollies. He's the OG poster girl for Alan's snakes alive. Anyway. I should have put some holes in the bag because they're all dead. No, he just modelled it. Oh, my mistake. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:16 So it's like based on his body shape. Tough candy named after you, though. It's pretty cool. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, his mum is really, really proud. She was actually the snake from Indiana Jones. Anyway, so I've obviously... If anyone else knows where any of the snakes are working,
Starting point is 00:27:34 please put it in today's episode thread. Yeah, because maybe people are working in film and they've seen them come through. Yeah, I'll have a look on their IMDB, actually. Anyway, sorry, that's fucking sent me. That's so funny. I've got to fucking rap. Do you want to hear it?
Starting point is 00:27:48 Yeah, let's hear the rap. Let's do it. All right. Are you ready? T-Lodge, Indiana Jones. Indiana Jones is a true classic. People were shattered that we hadn't seen it. Trying to get to the treasure, you know.
Starting point is 00:28:03 Wearing a hat, avoiding booby traps. We know Dr Jones hates all snakes. Wonder if the treasure is worth their stakes. Got to keep on digging all the time, even though stealing is a crime. Yeah. Yeah, I'm glad we had that snake chat now just to set up that joke. Thank you. Yeah, we're talking snakes and I'm like, mate, it's coming.
Starting point is 00:28:29 The snake is on its way. Not the only snake you've seen coming over the weekend. All right, things you love to see. Is it fair to say I'm a purveyor, a historian of old shit classic dad jokes? You know, there's a few jokes that have been going around for decades, centuries, and I just love it. The other day, Tony and I, we were shopping. Yes.
Starting point is 00:28:53 We're at Officeworks. You were sitting in the driver's seat and I put my hand out to open the door of the passenger seat and you drove off on me. Classic. And I'm here to say that joke is never not funny. Keep it up. Thank you. Keep it up. Thank you. I really appreciate that. Because I was a bit like, oh on me. Classic. And I'm here to say that joke is never not funny. Keep it up. Thank you. Keep it up.
Starting point is 00:29:06 Thank you. I really appreciate that. Because I was a bit like, oh, mother. Oh. She got me again. Yes. The classics continue. Never gets old.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Like those snakes, I never die. Never die. I love to see that too. Great. My, you'll love to see it for this Monday. I went to the footy the other week. Went and watched Carlton and GWS. Nice.
Starting point is 00:29:26 The Dill Buckley Cup, I believe. Oh! Yeah. Big fan. Someone's just moved in with Dill Buckley. I have too. Yeah, I have. And I went with my friend Jane's family and they're all really sporty
Starting point is 00:29:36 and they've barracked for Carlton forever. Did they tell you the Dill Buckley line? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But pretty good for me though still. Yeah. I got a message from Caitlin Teenini on Instagram and she said, Oh my God, I saw you at the footy and thought because I listen to you every day that you would recognise me.
Starting point is 00:29:53 Makes complete sense. So I yelled out, Hi, I'm Kate from Marvel Stadium and I approve this podcast. And everyone stared at me and you didn't even hear. And it was definitely. From Marvel Stadium. All right, we'll chat to you tomorrow. To meowro.
Starting point is 00:30:14 Love you, bye.

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