Toni and Ryan - The Health and Wellness Podcast
Episode Date: June 5, 2024I mean, the title speaks for itself 😛 Love ya xoxoxoxCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @rya...n.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge.
Hello.
And we are calling Lauren, who is not that Lauren, who is in Washington.
It's not DC, I'm guessing.
Which Washington do you think?
I know that there's like 18 of them, so.
I'm going to back in Washington DC, because it's the only one that I can remember what state it's in.
What state is Washington, D.C. in?
Please answer, Lauren.
Tony and Ryan.
Lauren!
Lauren, what's going on?
Nothing, just running to the back at work.
That's okay.
Are you hiding at work because you work in the White House?
No, no, no, no.
Washington State.
So I said to Tony, which of the 57 Washingtons do you think it is?
And she was wrong.
I just backed in DC because I thought, you know what?
Lauren's a smart girl.
She's working in the White House, you know.
You would guess that wrong, Tony, because you are a DC.
Yeah.
Lauren, will you approve today's podcast
i would love to legend hi this is lauren from washington state and i approve this podcast
now when you meet someone new, often people will go,
oh, yeah, nice to meet you.
What do you do for yourself?
And it's always weird when we say podcast because then they go,
well, what's your real job?
And we go, no, this is actually our real job.
How do you buy your rent?
Oh, fuck.
That was not good entrance, was it?
And the next question is often, oh, what's the podcast about?
And I think we can agree it's a health podcast.
It is a health podcast.
Fuck.
Do you want to?
Now, the reasons Tony is sick is because I had chewy milk last Friday.
It's all coming back to us now.
Yeah, so I did the chewy milk on the weekend.
Tony and I made love and then just it's incepted itself.
You know what's really nice about that?
You saying made love.
Yeah.
You normally just fuck me.
No.
You root me and boot me.
No, because we're best friends.
But this time we made love.
Because we're best friends.
You're not someone I fuck anymore.
You're someone I make love to.
I've had so many cold and flus.
She was emotional. And I'm really sook cold and flus. She's emotional.
And I'm really sooky because I'm sick.
Do you want me to come and give you a hug?
No.
With my penis.
No.
So I'm also, even though I'm definitely sounding chirpy,
the two of us.
Yeah, but yours is the other end.
No, it's been vomiting.
Oh, you didn't shoot yourself.
But it's fine.
That's why I thought it might have been a panic attack.
But either way, I was vomiting a lot and I was like, guys,
let's record later in the day because I think dad just needs a sleep in
and a chill and I've had a lot of like electrolyte and dry bread.
Yeah.
And just tried to chill out a bit.
Now, apparently before I got here, I didn't say why I was going to be late.
I just said let's record later and you guys were hypothesizing.
Well, we were like, so you just messaged me late last night,
like see you at two, can you sort everything out?
And I was like, yep, so I messaged the guys, we figured it out.
And we really held down the fort really well, you guys.
Yeah.
There's a nice camaraderie in the room.
We changed the name of the podcast.
We'll get to that later.
Wow.
I took one morning off.
She's gone wild.
I said, Ryan's going to be really happy with what we've achieved, you guys.
I am.
So we were talking about maybe that you were going to –
like you knew what time you were going to come in
because you had to pick someone up from the airport.
And who would that have been?
Wouldn't that be cool if Michael Jordan was here?
Well, we are a health and sports podcast.
Again, the controls, maybe you're kicking in.
We don't really do guests.
Yeah, so we don't do guests.
We don't do basketball.
You'd let that slide for Michael Jordan, wouldn't you?
Tony knows it's NBA finals time because she's like basketball is in the rain.
I fucking do.
Who's playing in the finals?
Fuck it, mate.
If you don't know, you don't know.
I went to a basketball game last year.
It was sick. It's this season. Yeah. Well. I went to a basketball game last year. It was sick.
It's this season.
Yeah.
Oh, well, I went to a game this season.
Yeah.
So it crossed over two years.
Yeah, it's this thing called.
It's not a calendar year.
No.
Yeah, right.
No, they have the summer off.
Sure.
Yeah.
Anyway, and then we were talking about some other people that like,
we were like, yeah, imagine if it was Michael Jordan.
Then we were like, you could walk in with like a really sick guest.
I'm a fucking sick guest.
But you could walk in with an awesome guest and we'd be like, oh,
but we did think maybe it was Michael Jordan.
And I'm actually got a bet with Torbs and I owe him five grand
if Mabel got a spot on Neighbours.
You thought that was the surprise?
Yeah.
Torbs was like, maybe Mabel got a spot on Neighbours. And I was like, surprise? Yeah. I was just like, maybe Mabel got a spot on Neighbours.
And I was like, if that's what it is, I'll give you $5,000.
You've wasted $5,000 because Neighbours finished three years ago.
No, it's back on.
It got re-bought again.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, mate, you can't kill it.
It's like a cockroach.
We got suckered into that huge finale.
Kylie Minogue was in it.
She had her one line.
She didn't have one line.
She barely spoke because apparently, was it a contractual thing
or because she's got a British accent now?
No, I think it was that she wouldn't have been able to like,
she couldn't commit to learning anything.
So instead she stood there and went.
For those of you who can't see, Tony's just smiling.
That does make sense.
If you watched it though, that's pretty much what happened.
But now it's back.
Which sounds like it's like, you know, how people go like,
it's my last tour.
And then they go, nah, now it is.
Now it is.
Do you think there's something nice about going out on top?
Like we've talked about this a little bit.
It was such a high.
Yeah.
Like they had every single person that's ever been in the show was back
and now they've got fucking.
When you say it's back, where is it? It's 10 still no yeah yeah yeah it's it's fucking it's 100%
on the tv yeah fuck right it might be on 10 peach do you know i don't think it's been on 10 for 15
years but like it's been on the secondary channel i don't think it's on 10 i think it's might be on
10 peach okay yeah okay cool so i'll say that already yeah yeah so
i've just got some i've got actually two pieces of advice for people today before we get to normal
or nah oh my gosh one is if you like and this is what happened to me yesterday in the office
if you had to like suddenly throw up where would you go to do that oh how much how much notice have i got
because like you know how sometimes you just throw up and you don't have a choice i was sitting on
that couch there and i went oh and then i reckon i had 30 seconds but i didn't know i had 30 seconds
but i was like this something ain't right i'd run to the toilet that would be my first instinct i
think yeah well if you had your choices. Where did you vomit in this office?
I feel scared.
I'd go for the toilet too.
James?
Toilet or pot plant if you got really good.
Not our plants from Melbourne Indoor Plants, James. I wish it was February 29th, 2028 because boy, do I have a tail.
Did you vomit?
No, that would have been great.
It would just be funny to go, oh, this place has already been poisoned.
Oh, yeah, it's already fucked.
Pippa weighs there when she's here as well.
Okay.
And I have done this at home before and Bridget's brought it up,
is that I threw up in the sink.
Did you rinse the sink after?
Yeah, like real good.
But it was the sink in the bathroom.
But you were already next to the toilet.
Yeah, so this is the thing i don't have this and
not i'm not saying i'm right i'm i'm wrong but i don't have this default like that the toilet is
the prime place for me it was just like it's got a fucking drain in it like i mean the toilet is
the best place because it just goes right down is why i know this now i did notice the cleaning
products in the bathroom did Did you? Yeah.
So I threw up into the sink and because Sophie,
what did we eat yesterday?
Was it?
A little bacon and egg rolls, I think.
A little toasty or something?
Yeah.
Yeah, there was chicken in it.
Or maybe that was from the servo wrap.
I don't know.
There's many culprits here that could have been there.
But anyway, the thing about throwing up in the sink and then just laying on the fucking bed in there like crying for a bit
is that when you go back into the bathroom, it's still in the sink.
It's still there.
Yeah.
You can't just hit flush.
No, but then it was in the moment where I was trying to transfer
from the sink to the toilet where I went.
Oh, that's too much.
Where I went, if I just had thrown up here first,
I wouldn't have to do this.
And then I told Bridget last night and she goes, yeah,
it's so annoying when you do that because I've thrown up
like in the laundry before.
I've had to clean out PJ's vomit from a sink before.
Yeah.
I just got a fresh manicure and it fucked up all my nail polish
because it like chipped off the side.
Yeah, so I put my hand in a garbage bag like and then like got it up to that.
Everything's really adding up because there's.
Yeah, there's stuff everywhere
it's a it's a ride yeah yeah but clean though hey it's clean yeah i'd say the cleanest ever
been because i hosed it down with chemicals and bleach and all sorts of shit because i was
panicking were you doing that while you were throwing up no because that really sucks no i
would have cleaned that up for you if i'd like if you'd said you were sick one of us would have
helped sorry if this is too much information, but I'm just going to say it
and then we're going to move on to normal or not.
Never.
Never too much.
So there was probably three separate times of throwing up
in the last 24 hours.
Once was that first one.
Three separate bouts.
Yeah.
First was that first one.
Yeah.
The last was like I woke up in the middle of the night
and had like seconds.
The second time I actually threw up whilst cleaning the first time
because it was so fucked
the collect you know but you know that dry reach because it's disgusting yeah and then i actually
yeah threw up whilst cleaning throw up and i was like this is the circle of life oh my god but
that's like yeah yeah yeah but that's that second one went into the toy and I was like, this is the circle of life. Oh, my God. But that's like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that second one went into the toilet and I was like,
oh, I'll skip the middleman here.
This is fucking genius.
And you go, fuck, that's a really good idea.
Yeah, kind of.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So welcome to Tony and Ryan.
We are a health podcast based in Melbourne.
Michael Jordan's on next.
Imagine if I rocked up with Charles Barkley and you were like.
So this is why we were laughing.
We were like, you could get any cool guest
and we'd still be like oh but we thought that maybe
it was Michael Jordan so it's like not as
good
yeah you're fucking do you know what I mean
I was just I just you could get any guest
on this podcast who would it be I would get
young gravy or Bert Krashner for you
thank you I appreciate
that and Ryan who would you get for Tony
I've got her.
Alison Roman.
Alison Roman already happened.
I'm on the scoreboard.
Or Mindy Kaling.
And from The Chase.
Oh, which one?
Which is the one?
The governess from The Chase.
The governess.
Is that who you met, Sophie?
I met Michael Jordan.
All right.
So I rock up.
Sorry. With the governess and Michael Jordan
and we only have one spare microphone.
Hey, MJ, just take a pop of seed over there next, mate.
Yeah, but you can hear him bouncing a ball in the background
and that's, you know.
Yeah.
What do you reckon that Anne and Michael Jordan would talk about
in the car?
On the way from the airport?
Like they're both in the airport and they go,
where's your plane from?
And Anne goes, Heathrow, love.
And then she goes, yeah, I flew in from LA or whatever.
From where?
LA.
I don't know where he fucking lives.
Yeah.
Is that where he lives?
North Carolina.
Great.
Is that where he lives now?
I don't know.
He's probably got eight properties fucking everywhere.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Have you seen Air with Matt Damon?
Yes, I have.
Yeah.
I feel like that would have the answer to this question
and we still don't know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let's do a few normal nars.
Maybe not many because a bit of a slow start today.
Yeah, sorry, guys.
How are you feeling now, though?
Sorry, I feel like I should check it.
I've had like tired, headache, then you're dehydrated
and I feel like with the, what's that thing with the police in it?
The rise and fall.
Craig David, I'm rising and falling.
My brain's not fast enough today, eh?
Like there's just no way.
I'm just like I'm feeling good now so'm like, let's just fucking pump it out before
I, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because I'll, and I will come down hard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you know what's the worst part about after you throw up, heaps, that you've got to like
eat shit food, like dry, bland food to like, you know, accustom your tummy back?
I said, oh.
Can't have dairy, you've just got to have like plain toast and shit.
Well, I had toast and then I went to put peanut butter on it,
which I thought was a safe bet.
No, babe, too heavy.
That's what Bridget said.
And I was like, what am I supposed to have on?
She's like, just eat the bread.
Just eat it.
Yeah, 100%.
That's ridiculous.
Anyway.
Maggie.
Hi, Maggie.
Maggie says, nothing makes me more mad than when people take their food
out of the microwave with a few seconds left on the clock
but don't clear out the timer.
So I rock up to the work kitchen, go to pop my lunch in,
and I have to be the one to clear their timer and then set my own.
Where do these arsehats get off, says Maggie.
Is clearing the timer normal and polite or nah? I think normal to
clear it off. Do you know what I hate when people do that? It's less about
me clearing the thing, but it's that you can't see the time.
Because we don't have any... Maybe this is a bigger problem.
It's three seconds. It's three seconds to go. What does that mean?
We don't have any clocks in our house.
Right.
Which I feel like I need to remedy.
Yeah.
But like.
You know, it says it on your phone.
Yeah, but you know when you're like cooking or doing something
and you kind of just glance over to check the time,
like on either the oven or the microwave.
Yeah.
So if there's only a second left, you can't see the time.
And then you're like, oh, my backup clock is now out of action.
Maybe we should start a business and it's like little clocks
that sit on top of your microwave.
But, I mean, yeah.
Because then you look over and you go two seconds
and that's fucking, oh, 10 past eight.
Yeah.
I'll tell you what I'd-
It's, I mean, no bad ideas, bad ideas.
So when I get up early with Mabel, there's often like breakfast at 7.30,
if you got up at 6, nappy change at 8.
So there's a bit of like you want to have-
So the reason I put sunrise on in the morning is because they've always got
the time in the corner.
Yes.
And so my backup clock is watching the TV.
No, actually, that's a really, really good one.
Yeah.
And then when now apparently, and until now I thought it was bullshit,
but when I was on radio for fucking years, they were like,
oh, you didn't do a time call.
Oh, you listen to Kiss 101.
One, 826.
And I always go, who the fuck cares?
They're in their car and it says it right there.
What's the fucking difference?
No, I need it.
And now I get it.
No, I need it.
I get it. And now I get it. No, I need it. I get it.
You know when people don't change their car clock during daylight savings?
And they just raw dog it for an hour?
For three months or whatever?
For three months, but like the hour's out and they're just like.
I hate it.
It's pretty easy to change the time.
Thank you.
Yeah, I agree.
Anna, this hasn't been sent in by Anna. I'm
bringing this in. You've handpicked this. Yeah. Hi, Anna.
Now, Anna is a TikTok. Is Anna going to get a bit of a fright from hearing this?
I don't know. I don't know if she knows about us. Oh,
I see. So, Anna's going to have to send it. So, she's a, what would you call her? A TikToker, Instagrammer,
creator in New York City.
Remember, you actually got offended last week where I said,
I was like, this girl, Anna, she's like as cute as a button.
She'll probably be my, you know, what a dream to be my second wife.
And you went.
Yeah, third wife.
Thank you.
So just.
Two women are going to die before she gets a kid.
Mine sounds close.
I'll be honest. First'll be honest my beautiful wife
ain't going nowhere yeah uh second of all tony i sound like i might die yesterday yeah and not
that she would have a bar of us but anna is now third yeah yeah um but you gotta have your backups
yeah let me send you this video of hers okay and it's normal or not today was not the day to have
therapy because i'm in a good mood.
My hair is slaying.
I like my outfit.
It really sucks when I'm in a good mood and I go to therapy.
I'm like, well, there's nothing to talk about.
Therapy is expensive.
It's put me in a bad mood.
Normal or nah, being pissed off when you're having a good day on therapy day.
Normal.
It's so annoying because you go, oh, I could have just kept having a good day but they've got
that 24-hour cancellation don't they so you're gonna pay either way oh but i feel like you don't
you don't get your money's worth because when you're having a shit day it's so they're ready
to fucking just lay it on them but also you go oh well i was in a good mood and now i've been
to therapy and i've it's like i've brought things up because i felt like i should yeah yeah and then
they're like so tell me how you feel about that and, well, it took me an hour to get to this point.
So now we're out of time.
And you go, I actually feel all right today.
Yeah.
And they go, oh, that normally upset you.
And you go, yeah, but I'm in a good mood.
Yeah.
I went and saw a lady last week and I was having a pretty good day and it didn't ruin
my day, but it was just annoying.
So she's like, so how can I help you?
And I'm like, I'm actually pretty good.
So I actually feel awesome.
Yeah.
How are you doing?
Do you need anything?
Yeah. Kind of. I'm like, I'm actually pretty good. You're like, I actually feel awesome. Yeah, how are you doing? Do you need anything? Yeah, kind of.
I'm already here.
Yeah, and then she said she's thinking of like expanding her business
to have like therapy dogs.
And then we just talked about dogs for an hour and I left.
So it didn't ruin my day, but it definitely was a waste of money.
Oh, fuck.
Yeah, but it's better than being depressed.
Yeah, yeah.
Maybe that's her ruse.
She goes, what I do is I get them in and I just talk about dogs
and they leave feeling a million bucks.
Feeling awesome.
I mean, I'd charge you half to come to my house and talk about dogs if you want.
Well, can I come for free?
No.
I'm running a business.
I'm running a fucking business here.
Hi, this is Lauren from Washington State,
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.
A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas today.
Over at our Patreon, Mika Tynan.
Good on you, Mika.
Thank you. Thanks, Mika.
Anais, Taryn and Tease and Courtney Otte.
Love you, Courtney.
Thank you very much.
You can jump on into our Patreon.
Come on over and join us.
Live streams.
We've got Tony Bingo, which actually remind me to do an update
because there's been a few.
Oh.
You can check that out as well.
Tony does Crafternoons live streams.
And what else have we done recently?
We did a self-care live stream on the weekend.
Tomorrow on the show.
Someone said something during the Patreon live stream
that I think we need to bring to the podcast attention.
And Tony Lodge, it's probably not the day for Tony to be called out.
Oh, no.
I hope I'm feeling better by then.
Yeah.
Actually, maybe I'll try.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't want to make accusations when you're not in prime to defend yourself.
What are you saying?
Tomorrow, find out.
First of all, after pitching follow-up Thursday last week.
I love follow-up Thursday and it was a crowd favorite as well.
We're going to do it.
Michael Jordan loves it.
Loved it.
He texts me after.
I'm going to do that in a second, but I've also got fucked business name Thursday.
Awesome.
Now, please everyone send us the shit.
Like, you know how I love a pun or a business name?
Yeah.
You love alliteration.
This isn't one of them.
This is just straight up fucked.
Oh.
And I think it's like my flap, Tony.
And so I just need you to tell me what you think of this.
This is an Altham business in my hometown.
Oh.
So you know how there's a few pizza places that I'll rotate through?
Yes.
There's one that I won't go to because I refuse to get pizza
because of their name.
Oh.
In Altham Woods, the name of the pizza place is called House of Salad.
House of Salad?
Yeah.
But it's a pizza place.
Yeah.
Or they do salad as well.
I'm sure there's a side salad somewhere.
I'm sure you could get a salad from there.
Is it like ironic though?
Is it like, oh, House of Salad, like comes up on the receipt,
House of Salad, so you don't have to tell your wife.
You know, is it one of those?
Well, you say that as a joke and you do sound beautiful today.
Thanks.
But I actually went, that's actually not a bad move.
Yeah.
It's like the credit card statement comes through.
Oh, Ryan's really just eating, right?
Going to the House of Salad four times a week.
Yeah.
Oh, my God, he's eating so much salad.
But the thing is when I move back to town,
like there's a lot of new businesses, new restaurants,
you don't know what's what.
Yeah.
And you look at the thing and you go, oh and chips house of salad but it just doesn't it does
the opposite of what it says on the tip yeah and that's not really helpful for a business unless
it's like a in joke do you know what i felt down about the other day have you ever heard about a
place called no okay so there's this place it's called If I'm about to find out that's not a...
I'm going to fucking shit.
I do believe it is their...
But...
It's not what they make.
What?
They do...
They do salads.
It's drugs.
Oh.
Fuck, I don't know if everyone knows that.
What do you mean it's drugs?
Yeah, so the guy was like, oh, yeah, I'll sell ****,
but you know it's ****.
Fuck, I actually don't know if people know this,
but I'm so fucked.
And anyway.
Can we put this to air?
Are you outing?
Is this a rip?
Am I?
I don't know.
I'm going to have to text Torbs and ask him.
So the front was going too well.
Well, yeah,
the people are actually
dope, you guys.
Like, you should make this.
The is actually dope.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So.
Fuck.
I don't.
Don't post that yet.
The Australian tax office rocks up
and they go,
so how many
do you sell on average a night?
And he goes,
three.
And they go,
great.
So you've made $4.8 million in the last 12 months.
And he goes, yep.
Yeah.
All good.
Yeah.
And it just is fine.
Like it all adds up.
Yeah, that's fine.
Is somebody Googling?
Nothing is coming up for that.
Yeah, because it's dark web, bro.
It's not top web.
It's dark web.
It's not light web.
It's dark web.
This might be like inside knowledge.
Okay.
Okay.
If you've just heard a beep.
If you're listening to this in court.
It's a beloved restaurant.
If you've just heard a beep, it's because we found out that what I revealed
is not common knowledge.
I think for those listening in court, because I'm assuming they'll listen
to the whole episode.
Sorry about the first bit.
Fuck, no, we can't.
I just want to.
Tony can't be prosecuted because she's not in the right frame of mind.
You know how they say that?
A plead insanity or something.
No, a plead cold.
Plead flu.
Yeah.
Oh, she murdered eight guys.
Oh, God.
Yeah, but she had the flu.
She had the flu
and they go,
oh, all right.
Get some cold and flus
on the way home
and make sure you get
a...
Fuck, I don't know
if I'm allowed to say that.
We'll find out later.
If you heard a big beep,
now you know why. I reckon it's fine. If you don't want to get caught for selling drugs, don't know if I'm allowed to say that. We'll find out later. If you heard a big beep, now you know why.
I reckon it's fine.
If you don't want to get caught for selling drugs, don't sell them.
You don't know if it's true.
It could be defamation.
Yeah, that is different.
So we're not outing druggies.
We're accusing legitimate business people of being drug dealers.
That is bad.
Yeah, that's so bad.
That is bad. Okay, you's so good. That is bad.
Okay, you guys.
We'll beep that business name, shall we?
We'll beep the business name.
Beep the business name.
Yeah, beep the business name.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, my God.
You guys, I am not being an A player today.
No, you are being an A.
You are an A player.
Born and raised.
Let's do a follow-up
Thursday and hope we don't defame any other local
Beeps. Defaming
Thursday.
Thursday defaming.
We can work on that.
Last week we
Sorry, Tony's lost it. You just need a moment?
I just don't know why
I would know that if it wasn't true. There's no reference online. Okay, Tony's lost it. You just need a moment? I just don't know why I would know that if it wasn't true.
There's no reference online.
Okay, it's obviously like an underground operation.
Yeah, but I feel like underground would also be on Reddit.
I'm going to text Torbs and ask how he knows about this.
I just said, how do you know about beep business being a drug front
and can I say it on the pod?
Love you. The in-house lawyer? Well, no, because he a drug front, and can I say it on the pod? Love you.
The in-house lawyer?
Well, no, because he's the one that told me.
Yeah, but that also won't stand up in court.
No, no, no.
But you're right, my boyfriend reckons it's all good.
No, no, no.
What I'm saying is, like, how does he know?
We're going to beep the businesses.
I wish we didn't mention it 58 times.
Well, I'm not fucking cutting them, mate.
I don't care.
Let's do follow-up Thursday.
Follow-up Thursday.
Recently, we've had a confession about a psychologist who,
just a quick recap, the client said,
I'm sleeping with a married man and it turns out it was
the psychologist's husband.
So she couldn't confront the patient because that's unprofessional
and she couldn't confront the husband because of patient confidentiality.
And yeah, so it turns out she moved out
and blah, blah, blah. 20 million plus views. It's gone
fucking bunta online. Yeah, it's gone crazy. Just a bit of
follow up. For a Thursday.
At Wiseass. follow up from for a Thursday for a Thursday at wise ass.
There isn't a single universe in the multiverse where the patient didn't know
that the doctor was the lover's wife.
Shame on her.
Do you reckon that she went in there to like dangle herself in and was like,
oh, I'm sleeping with this guy. So DeMira, who's on TikTok, said she knew and ironically
because she was there because of the guilt,
this was her way of relieving the guilt.
So she's kind of told the therapist without telling the therapist.
So she's like, oh, it's sort of a bit like layered,
but it was sort of her way of like doing it.
Fuck, that's so tough, eh?
Tracy said the lady absolutely, the common theme in the comments was like she had to have known.
The client.
The client had to have known.
The lady absolutely knew.
I'd drop her as a client.
Surely there has to be a conflict of interest where you can just burn the place down because, you know, it just feels right.
Well, yeah, there has to be something somewhere where you go,
my thing would be isn't it a conflict of interest anyway that, like,
they were linked?
I don't know.
Cleo is a psychologist herself.
Cleo.
So she's done all the, you know, she knows what you can and can't do.
Yeah.
And she said, I would have broken the confidentiality
and maybe broken a few heads as well.
Oh, Cleo, I'm glad you're not my therapist.
I want you to be my therapist, A, because less dog chat
and also just give it to me straight, dog.
Yeah.
Sometimes you've got to cut a bitch.
Do you remember that hairdresser that went viral for being like,
I don't take your advice for what the haircut should be.
I just do what I think will look good.
Was it Michelle in Sydney?
I can't remember.
It was like this viral thing.
You're going to go, oh, I'm blonde with this.
And she's like, no.
She goes, no, I'm going to do it. And then she just did it. Yeah. Kind of right there. I'd't remember. It was like this viral thing. And she was like, oh, I'm blonde with this. And she's like, no. She goes, no, I'm going to do it.
And then she just did it.
Yeah.
Kind of right there.
I'd do that.
M. Jacobs tattoo.
Hi, M.
I was once tattooing a client and I was like, so, you know,
what's been going on?
She goes, oh, just met this boy on Tinder.
Like, check him out.
Shows the picture and it's the tattooist's boyfriend.
I saw this fucking comment and I literally went through the roof.
Yeah.
Maybe that's why he's sick because of the asbestos.
That's so funny.
I don't have the energy to laugh.
How fucking bad would you feel?
Yeah.
Do you reckon that this is the same situation,
the chick getting tattooed?
She knew.
Except I would not trust someone holding a fucking tattoo gun.
Yeah.
Near my skin and being like, so your boyfriend's fucking me.
Yeah, do you reckon you'd fuck the tattoo?
Well, like.
Sorry, I just need to make a little edit there.
Yeah.
Bitch.
But do you reckon that the girl getting tattooed knew?
That seems a bit more innocent because you don't have a full backstory
and go in weekly and you're just in the chair.
Yeah, and you probably do the walk-in and whatever.
You've been getting tattooed a fair bit recently.
I'm guessing it's sort of like.
But I know Courtney well now.
But is it like, yeah, but you kind of just make a conversation,
being polite.
Totally.
Yeah, yeah.
Like, oh, I just started seeing someone, as you said, right?
Like, that's very innocent.
Yeah.
Now, this is from E.
That's all their name is, just E.
E.
Yeah.
Doesn't work at the other place.
At Beat Restaurant.
At Beat Restaurant.
And they've just done a little wordplay.
Oh, amazing.
Yo, Doc.
So, this is the relationship between the doctor and the patient.
Yo, Doc, are you a tarpa?
Because I've got some shit coincidence chat.
The bloke I'm banging has the same last name as you do.
Oh, my God.
What a coincidence.
What a good coincidence.
You won't believe it.
Yes, I'm fucking this guy who's married.
So sad.
Yeah.
Yeah, she's a therapist. Her name's name's joanne smith oh a bit like yours
crazy i mean joanne's it's pretty like normal name yeah oh but like yeah yeah for the story
yeah yeah um but thank you to everyone who's viewed and shared that it's gone mental online
it actually it really has gone crazy and one of our better ones because it wasn't about us.
Yeah.
Which is nice.
It's nice for our show to do the rounds without soap
having to go inside Tony's arsehole.
My arsehole.
Yeah.
For the mental health, I think, as well.
It's just a bit nice.
Yeah, because when you read the comments, it's not about you.
Yeah, it's about the story and you go, great,
I'll read these ones.
Yeah.
What do you love to see today, Tony Lodge?
I've got to love to see it here. last week uh on the show we had an episode called tony's wedding shoes we talked
about how as a kid i loved um jelly shoes yes uh they're fucking back i've been sent i've been
sent this on instagram about 1600 times um which i love shameless Shameless, the podcast, have just started a new arm of their business.
It's called Stylish.
Oh, I thought you were going to say, and the arm of the business is jelly shoes.
No.
They got into the production business.
No, they've started doing this like fashion thing as well.
And they posted that there was this $1,300 jelly sandal that has sold out in every color.
$1,300? Yeah. that has sold out in every color. And $1,300.
Yeah.
And they're back.
Fuck.
And in Vogue, they said,
there's no doubt we'll be seeing these types of shoes everywhere this summer.
Jelly shoes are fucking back.
Now, when did this come out?
So it was 10 hours after our episode came out.
So I think it might actually have been me.
Well, I mean, it's pretty fucking clear cut, isn't it?
It's pretty fucking clear cut.
So Shameless listens to our podcast and just lifts our content.
Yeah.
No, we're not saying that.
No, because you've worked with them before.
They're friends or whatever.
Oh, no, they're totally friends.
Yeah.
Maybe they were light on content and they thought.
Well, you've done a few episodes on one of their other podcasts.
I have, yep.
Maybe should you be sending another invoice through?
And go, yeah, you guys were a bit light on,
needed something to be the next big thing,
and you thought we'll grab onto this.
This is how I'm imagining the production meeting at Shameless would be going.
Sorry, have we got confirmation?
Sorry, I've just got a text back from Torbs.
Okay.
I said, do you know about Blah being a drug front?
Can I say it on the pod?
Torbs said, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
It was my barber.
So probably, like probably you can say it.
Like people are talking about it.
But Torbs then said that might be slander.
So I think that we go with the original plan.
We beep the restaurant.
Which barber?
I can't.
I'm in no place to say.
Is it still defamation on us if we are quoting the barber?
Well, this is the thing.
I've just heard it from someone else, but I think it's like giving
that weight
by sharing on a podcast is obviously-
Yeah, but how many people are going through the barber in a day?
How many times has he told that story?
I think if you presented it as the barber said this, but-
That's what I'm saying.
No, but you didn't start that way.
Well, okay, what I'm going to do is I'm going to say the line
and then James, you edit it back in to back at the top.
No, so we'll beep all restaurant mentions.
So edit this back to the start.
No, we're not doing this.
This is edit-ception.
So I was at the bar the other day and he reckons that
*** is a drug front.
No.
Well, okay.
So you've obviously, you've just heard another beep because we've just beeped the name again
and we're not editing that back to the beginning.
Anyway, the jelly shoes.
What do you love to see, Ryan?
Katie Dunn, no relation.
Well, you don't know because you're adopted.
But I do know because she's not related.
But you wouldn't know, would you?
But Dunn is my, like, the name that I moved into.
What a coincidence, though, if her name is Dunn.
So you're like, oh, we're not related because she's not a Dunn.
Yeah, it turns out she's my son.
Oh, Dunn's son.
Yeah.
My husband and I have two kids, two and four.
So, you know, they're busy.
They live in regional Victoria.
Oh, like me.
Yeah.
In the country.
Yep.
Back where I used to live.
We haven't had a proper date night and, you know,
like a few drinks and really gone for it since the two-year-old was born.
Aw.
We live in country Victoria.
She doesn't say like Tony, but I think we all know.
Yeah, out in the country.
Yep.
I see Katie a lot at the milk bar.
Milk bar?
Sounds like something that would be in the country, eh?
Maybe a milk production thing because they're milking cows.
No, but like there's one milk bar.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Like there's one place you can-
Us country folk call that the general store.
Yeah, well, us country folk call it the fucking milk bar.
You ask Katie about it.
My sister was having a black tie wedding in God's country.
In Perth.
Yep, in Freo.
Still God's country.
In Freo, cool.
My best friend Shelly flew from country Victoria with us to Fremantle
at our own expense just so she could sit in the hotel room
and watch the children so we could have
a fabulous night of free booze, dancing and celebrating with my sister and her now husband.
That is so sick.
That is sick.
What a great friend.
Because we were in Western Australia and we wanted to show her our appreciation.
They took her to Dome.
The next morning we took her out to Dome.
Just ask country girls. gotta stick together there's a dome on rot nest yeah yeah there fucking is yeah which is crazy oh they went to rotto after that's cool yeah maybe the wedding
was there and they left from you know oh yeah on the on the fairs but don't you like to say that
you do love to say that all right tony lodge i would do that for you if you needed a babysitter i'd come with you and probably work at pay so
it's all good and i get to go and have dome oh fuck yeah what i wouldn't give and i know that
someone that's had a big 24 hours on the stomach shouldn't be recommending this but i would fucking
drink hollandaise or some dome in a straw right now. Mate.
Do you want to know something really lame?
Always.
Yesterday I got an iced coffee.
Fuck, there's so many reasons why I was sick.
Yeah.
Mate, you've had like a real crazy day of tummy days.
Yeah, yeah.
So Sophie got this big iced coffee.
Don't blame Sophie.
No, no, but it didn't come with a straw and that's not on Sophie.
That's on the place.
And then you know how in-
Must have been a drug front.
Yeah.
And then you know how we've got those little like milks thing?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they've got like the little straw?
Yeah.
I took out the tiny little straw and then put it in this giant iced coffee.
That's so funny.
It was so funny.
That sounds comical.
Can someone take a photo of that?
We should have because it was so hilarious.
That's so funny.
You would be like, oh, I'm a giant.
Yeah, kind of.
My little straw.
And then I realized, Tony, when you decked out the kitchen,
we moved in here, there's a whole drawer of straws.
Of straws.
And I saw them yesterday.
I thought of everything.
Because when I was looking for cleaning product to clean the bathroom,
I pulled over in the drawer and went.
Tomorrow, I know that you're not feeling well.
Yeah, that's okay.
For your own sake.
Yeah.
I reckon bring your A game because shots have been fired.
Okay.
At Tony Lodge and you're going to want to defend yourself.
Good.
That's all I'll say.
I can cut that tomorrow.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It sounds like tomorrow's problem.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tony Morrow.
Cool.
You can work on that. I'll work on that. Yeah, yeah, okay. Tony Morrow. Cool. You can work on that.
I'll work on it.
Yeah, yeah, okay.
We'll chat to you tomorrow.
Love you, bye.
Sorry for everything.
Love you, bye.
Sorry about the sled.