Toni and Ryan - THROWBACK: Craziest Coincidences
Episode Date: December 28, 2023COINCIDENCE CHAT WITH OUR MATE RICKNAME!!!! And hey.... see ya next year! Love ya xCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on In...stagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hey, it's Matt from Breslin, Georgia, and I approve this podcast.
Hey, it's Matt here, and today we're throwing it back to some of the best moments of Tony and Ryan for 2023.
The guys are on holiday at the moment, but we'll be back before you know it
with some brand new episodes for 2024.
Today, we hear the story of the worst hustle on Tony's mate.
But first up, some of the worst or best coincidences.
We'll let you guys decide.
Is there anything more exciting in this world
than meeting someone and then you figure out
you've both got the same birthday?
Literally, my mind is just flooded with all the people I've ever met
with the same birthday as me.
It shouldn't be that exciting, but you meet someone and you're like,
oh, me too, this is like great.
We're in this exclusive little club.
How many people could be in it?
It turns out one in 365.
But how many people are in this cool exclusive club?
I was literally about to be like, what would the odds be?
But, yep, you're right.
Okay, I'm going to up the ante here.
Yeah.
Ever met someone same day, same month, same year?
Because I have.
Really?
Yes.
Who was it?
Yeah, a girl, Isabella, who I went to uni with.
And on the – see how excited I am?
And we went to uni and she was doing like studying something else,
but she was like in my cohort.
And, yeah, and she goes, oh, my God.
I don't know how it fucking came up, but started doing that.
Oh, my birthday's at the end of the year.
Oh, what month?
Oh, me too.
What day?
Oh, me too.
What year?
And then you go, oh, my God, you were 93, baby.
She goes, yeah.
And it's so exciting.
It's thrilling.
It's like high octoctane fun.
I played volleyball with Dave DeLayland,
who we've talked about a few times on this podcast before,
and he's born on the same day as me.
And every time I say, like, g'day, 28th, he's like, sup, 28th.
And that was 10 years later.
We just call it 28th.
Same year?
No, he's a year older.
Oh, so not quite as exciting as mine.
Two years older at school.
Not quite as exciting as mine.
How is he two years older at school?
Because did they do the, the like half a year thing?
Like instead of it being like January to December,
it was like June to July or whatever?
Well, being on the 28th, sometimes that cut off was like, yeah.
The cut off, you know what I mean?
So, I always thought these coincidence chats and birthday chats were fun.
And then I'm listening to a podcast by Seth Godin, right,
who's like this amazing marketing brain, like a prolific author,
very niche, but like I love this guy.
He's very, very smart.
Yep.
And he tells this story.
And remember Double Gang a Week?
Double Gang a Week.
Like on Facebook, everyone posted who they were.
Double Ganger.
Yeah.
What's Double Ganger?
It's Double Ganger.
Yeah, like a famous person that looks like you. Yeah. What's doppelganger? Doppelganger. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like a famous person that looks like you.
Yeah.
Remember that was like a week, like 10 years ago on Facebook.
Yeah, and you'd make it your profile photo.
Yeah.
I never did one.
But everyone's like posting these hot as fuck actresses and you're like, babe.
Oh, yeah, you don't look like Anne Hathaway.
So Seth Godin is like an old guy.
He's a bald guy.
He wears glasses.
And he said that during doppelganger week, he finds out about this social justice lawyer in Brazil
who's like his long-lost twin.
Oh.
Yeah, and he's like he's got the same glasses, same bald head,
like similar stature and he was like, oh, it's Doppelganger week,
my Doppelganger is this guy from Brazil.
Oh, my God.
And he made a whole podcast about it.
Well, because Seth Godin's a blogger, his daily blog was like,
oh, an industry trend, cultural fad is this Doppelganger week. Oh doppelganger week by the way my doppelganger is this guy from brazil
seriously though he's doing some great work here's his twitter thing if you want to find out more
yeah the next day he travels to germany from his house in new york to sit down to watch an
orchestra and guess who sits next to him the The Brazilian social justice lawyer sits down right next to him
and goes, oh, we do look the same.
Thanks for the blog post, by the way.
Shut the front door.
Isn't that fucking crazy?
Come on my face and call me a cupcake.
And how.
So anyway, so I'm listening to this podcast with Seth Godin
and I am as shooketh as we are in this room when I was listening
to it in the car yesterday.
That's insane, isn't it?
That's a great story.
But then something happens.
No.
Seth Godin goes, this is on the podcast,
but coincidence chat is the same as dream chat.
No one gives a fuck except for you.
And I, for the first time in my life, said, no, Seth Godin.
I'm into this.
You're wrong.
Your story's sick.
Coincidence chat is sick.
And then could you just describe yesterday we're in the office
and I said I think I want to talk about coincidences.
Can you describe the atmosphere?
All of us got lit up.
We were excited.
How good is this?
So I was like, all right, Tarpers.
It's like I said about the birthday thing.
Instantly, all the people you've ever had the same birthday.
Yeah.
Tarpers, tell me your crazy coincidence story,
not just because I want to hear it,
but to prove just how fascinating it is to hear other people's
coincidences stories.
Mate, you're pointing that finger.
You're getting loud.
We all think it's cool.
You actually don't need to prove it.
You can.
Do you want to take a knee for a second?
Take a little sip.
Because we are as excited as you are.
I think it's amazing.
I just rifled off that story about Isabella.
I'm still thinking about that.
Yeah.
Producer Cam's like got his hand up because he's like,
I've met someone with the same birthday as me.
You know, we're all into it.
So I wake up this morning and there's, like, 200 comments on the post.
And I was like, see?
200 coincidences.
This is a fucking big thing.
People love this stuff.
Because people like talking about themselves.
I mean, I've got a podcast with my own name on it.
How good is this?
Yes.
We're all revved up.
I knew coincidence stories would be awesome.
Fuck yeah.
Until I read them.
Oh.
Are they crap coincidences?
Or just, I feel like, do you know what it is?
I think that the Seth Godin story of the doppelganger thing
and then sitting down together, that is insane, right?
You've set the bar so high for yourself that then obviously it was, you know.
Chloe Diamond.
Hi, Chloe.
Thanks so much for sharing your story with us before Ryan fucking
ripped you apart in a minute.
I'm born on the same day, just the day number,
not the month or year.
That's my cousin.
Oh, lift, lift.
Don't drink water, Cam. They're getting worse. He's just fucking sp. Oh, lift. Lift. Don't drink water, Cam.
They're getting worse.
You just fucking spattle over the desk.
Lift.
And at this point, I'm still like, oh, not a good start, but like, no, I'm still fucking
this is going to be great.
Well, did you say her name was Chloe?
Yep.
God, she just must get nothing done at uni.
Everyone's called Chloe, aren't they?
Yeah.
Ben Twig.
The big twig.
The big twig.
I have the same birthday as Shaquille O'Neal and we both don't like spicy food.
Crazy, right?
That isn't crazy.
I actually won't give that a crazy.
You know what I mean?
You know how some things are crazy?
That's not crazy.
Okay.
Chloe hasn't helped me out.
The Big Twig is not helping. I mean, the Big Twigs is closer than Chloe. Chloe, Chloe hasn't helped me out. The big twig is not helping.
I mean, the big twigs is closer than Chloe.
They're just the same day.
They're something, oh, my God, my name starts with the same letter
as Chanel, the brand.
Like, that's not interesting.
Jay lives in Gippsland and he restores and makes chairs.
And he goes, I was at the local barber and it turns out when I sat
in the chair that we had repaired it once.
That's no coincidence.
That's your job.
How many chair restoring places are there in Gippsland?
Gippsland, yeah.
See if it was a bigger, say if you're a chair restorer in New York
and you happen to, you know, there's what, billions of chairs
in New York, that's pretty crazy.
You're a plumber.
You'll never guess.
There's a toilet in my house.
Yeah, but Gippsland, there's what, five chairs?
You know, you probably fixed all of them.
Crazy coincidence, right?
Not really, no.
It's not bad.
Jay-Z isn't bad, but it's probably not really good.
Sorry, I've got the hiccups because.
Finally, and I was like, all right, Hayley Simpson.
Oh, there's only one more.
Hayley Simpson, let me guess.
There's a really famous family with my last name.
You might have heard of it.
Every day at six o'clock I turn on the bloody TV and wouldn't you guess it, there's me bloody name on the TV.
So, I got turned on the bloody TV.
Fuck's sake.
And wouldn't you guess it, there's me bloody name on the TV.
So, I thought, okay, the big twig, Chloe J, haven't helped me out.
I know that Hayley Simpson's going to bring it home.
And she's going to make me think that, no, this is interesting.
This is worthy of its own segment.
And Seth Godin can fuck himself.
Hayley Simpson.
I once met a guy who thought he might have known my brother.
What?
What?
You want to read about it?
Well, you would because I did in the comment section last night.
Hang on.
I need a moment.
Oh, God.
I once, hang on.
I once met a guy who thought he knew my brother.
I'm trying to think. I'm trying.
I'm trying.
Okay.
She would have been better going with the Simpsons.
Do you remember, yeah, maybe I.
Yeah, is his name Bart?
I think I've heard of him. Do you have a brother? Yeah, maybe. Yeah, is his name Bart?
I think I've heard of him.
Fuck.
I think I'm going to have to stop doing this podcast.
No.
I quit.
Please tell me.
How many comments were there?
There was 257.
Producer Cam, write this down.
We're doing this again next week.
That's great.
I love it.
And the coincidence is that we're doing it again.
What a coincidence.
We did this last week.
I've never laughed that out of my life.
That's awesome.
That's great.
A tick of approval from me.
Hey, it's Matt from Brazelton, Georgia,
and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. Would it be fair to say that, like, homeowners kind of, like,
look out for each other?
Yeah, there's sort of a camaraderie.
I know what you're going through.
Like, especially out where you are in the burbs.
Yeah.
You know, when you're talking about, you know, I don't know,
chopping the wood out the front, are you kind of like, oh, g'day, Joe?
You know, like is there a bit of that?
The hat tips and nods I got from people walking because I was in the driveway.
Yeah.
So people walk in the park and they've got a fire bell so that they know
and they're sort of like, oh.
That time of year again, you know.
Winter comes around every year.
Who would have guessed it?
Yeah.
So I feel like it's like a homeowner thing but like neighbours or like when
you're in the area and you go, oh, like I've seen a moving truck out the front of there.
I know they're moving in, moving out.
When we moved in, we got like biscuits and like little notes.
Someone dropped a bottle of wine and said, welcome to the neighbourhood.
And Bridget went, well, that's shit.
Throw it out.
No, of course not.
She knows all about wine.
So she's like, yeah.
She gifted it.
I didn't say that.
Yeah.
She went, this will be great to cook with.
You know, he's really shit wise.
And then this guy from down the road.
That deserved a bigger laugh.
Fuck, she's good.
This guy from down the road brought his dog over and was like,
oh, just in case our dogs run into each other,
it would be nice for them to meet.
And they were a little brown Labrador.
That's really nice.
Yeah, no, lovely.
That is really nice.
Yeah, so there's a lot of camaraderie in the burbs with us homeowners.
Yeah, and it's kind of like, you know, lads in their lawn,
lads in their log chopping, you know, that kind of thing.
Have you seen my lawn recently?
No, I haven't.
Fuck.
I'll send you a photo.
Is it nice?
Yeah.
Well, I'd love to see it because I'm in lawn town.
Oh.
So my best friends, Jag and Lane, they live in New Zealand.
They recently got married, which is very exciting.
They also just bought a house.
Oh, well done.
Yeah.
So they bought this house and they were kind of waiting for it to be, like,
finished being built or whatever.
Yep.
And then they, you know how they kind of, like,
settlement period of it being like.
Yeah, it's always a legal fuss.
Yeah, you've, like, bought it but you haven't moved in yet.
Yeah, the bank needs to sign off and the lawyers need to sign off.
And it's in like a new estate type of area.
So I'm guessing that there was a bit of a hold up with like getting gas connected
and all of that stuff.
So they were really excited and at their like lock up,
they did like a walking Zoom tour with Torbs and I
because obviously we can't go and see the house at the moment
because they're in Auckland.
And so they're really excited and we're really proud of them.
It's very, very cool.
And they're like, oh, the whole house is epic.
I really want to show you.
And we're really pumped because they've got this big backyard
and they took us out the back and I was like, oh,
you guys will be able to have a massive barbecue. They've both and I was like, oh, you guys will be able to have like a massive barbecue.
They've both got nieces and nephews so they'll be, you know,
have the kids around and whatever.
I was like, fuck, that's so awesome.
They go, yeah, but like the lawn's pretty crook,
like needs a little bit of love.
Right, okay.
And I was like, oh, no, it looks right.
And they're like, oh, it's a bit, like some of it's okay,
like there's chunks of like good green lawn but then it's like a bit sandy. You know, it's a bit, like some of it's okay. Like there's chunks of like good green lawn,
but then it's like a bit sandy.
You know, it's just, it's not really ideal.
Anyway, so like two weeks later or whatever, it's move-in day.
Yeah.
And Jag and Lane are there and they're like,
both of their families are there.
You know when it's kind of like a working day?
Yeah, pile in, yeah.
And so they've, you know, everyone's got stuff in their car
and there's all these cars out the front and everything's happened.
And isn't it funny, right, that, like, when you're moving,
it's like crime doesn't exist.
No.
Like, the front door's open, the back door's open,
the cars are all open, all your shit's on the front lawn
and you just go, well, no, it's going to do anything.
No, I'm going to fucking steal it.
Yeah, just chuck it out the front, put it there, close the –
we don't have a gate.
Right. Back fence is down because we need to move the thing through. Yeah, because, you know, I'm like, oh. No, I'm going to fucking steal it. Yeah, just chuck it out the front. Put it there. Close the – we don't have a gate. Right.
Back fences down because we need to move the thing through.
Yeah, because, you know, I'm like, oh, yeah, there's just –
people walking past and people got – well, they're moving,
so that's actually not okay.
Can I set you a challenge?
What?
Steal something?
Yeah, if you wore the right clothes on this Saturday –
because Saturday is like a kind of moving day, right?
Absolutely.
Whenever you see a removaling truck. Removaling. Fair enough. Removal. Removal. Yeah. Because Saturday is like a kind of moving day, right? Absolutely. Whenever you see a removaling truck.
Removaling.
Removal.
Removal.
Truck.
Removalist.
Just follow them in and just walk in in your high-vis.
And go, get out, guys.
How you doing?
And just pick up the TV and leave.
Oh, okay.
Don't set anyone that challenge because that's awful.
I'm obviously also not going to do that.
But you absolutely could.
Wow.
We will never know unless you do the challenge.
It's the same as getting in backstage to a concert.
If you're wearing all black, they'll let you through.
Yeah.
Like the amount of times that I've done that.
You just walk through?
Yeah.
Yeah, act of confidence.
If you're wearing blacks and Doc Martens,
there's no way that they aren't going to let you through.
Like there's just no way.
When I was young, my mate, like after midnight,
it's really hard to get into this club because it's full.
Yeah.
Right?
So there's a bit of a line out the front.
So you're waiting for people to stumble out to get in.
And so he gets there late and he goes, oh, the line's really long.
And he was a muso.
Tom Wood.
Oh, yeah.
And he's got the guitar and he just walked up to the front
and goes, I'm with the band, with his guitar.
And they would have gone, yeah, bro, straight in.
They don't have bands there.
Oh.
It was like a DJ.
But the security guard goes, oh, okay.
It's actually foolproof.
So a minute later after he goes, oh, it's a long line,
he's in a club holding a guitar.
He's like, what happened?
He's like, don't worry about it.
But I'm in here.
I'm in.
He goes to the coat check and he goes, do you mind hanging on to this?
Do you take guitars?
Is that okay?
But so everybody's like out on the lawn.
They're ferrying shit in and out.
They're all kind of like out the front.
And this guy pulls up in a landscaping truck.
Great.
You know, those like big flatbed utes kind of thing.
And he's obviously got like the logo with a tree on it on the side of the door or whatever.
And he kind of says like, oh, g'day, like welcome to the neighborhood.
And Jag walks over because he's, you know, man of the house.
Yeah, he's got that vibe.
He's got that pride.
He's so proud of just, like, having saved up, like, he and Lane
saved up all their money, bought this house, and he walks over
and he goes, oh, hey, dude, like, whereabouts do you kind of live,
whatever?
Hey, how are you?
And the guy goes, oh, I don't live here, but, like, I'm a landscaper
and I did a few of the properties around here. Yeah. And Jack goes, oh, I don't live here, but, like, I'm a landscaper and I did a few of the properties around here.
And Jack goes, oh, yeah.
And he goes, yeah, so I, like, know the area real well.
Yeah.
And he goes, how's your grass looking out the back, mate?
And Jack goes, oh, actually, like, not too hot.
Like, it's looking pretty fine.
Was this the landscaper that did it originally?
Well, he just said, I did a bunch of the houses around here.
So obviously knew that, I don't know, maybe the soil wasn't very good quality.
Or sometimes you need a certain type of grass for a certain type of area.
Exactly, right.
Or if it's like more sandy, you need less water.
Or if it's whatever.
How's your grass looking, mate?
And Jay goes, oh, you're not great.
And he goes, let me have a look for you.
Like I know the area.
Let me fucking give it a gander.
And a bit of tradie energy.
Yeah.
Ladsie, local neighbour.
Right.
And so he parks his landscaping truck like across the road.
Yeah.
And then walks through the house.
Yeah.
And like, of course,
both families are there.
So he meets Jag's mum and dad, meets Lane's mum and dad.
Hi, folks.
Yeah, I'm sharing the drugs with my neighborhood.
Her sister, like, Jag's brother, you know, like, Jag's nephew,
like, just everyone's there.
He meets the whole family.
Great.
Walks through the house and, you know, Jag's mum says,
oh, did you want a lemonade?
Like, I'm just making up some, like, you know,
like it's this, like, beautiful moment for their family.
Walks through, goes out the back and goes, oh, fuck, mate,
that's not ideal, eh?
That's not looking good.
Look, I like you.
I think you're a really nice guy.
I say it's your first home, mate.
We want it to be perfect for you.
I shouldn't be telling you this.
First red flag.
But if I was in this position, I'd want someone to help me out.
That's a good line.
Yeah, isn't it?
The guys who are doing houses around here would charge you crazy amounts, mate.
Probably cost you $1,200.
I can do this for you for $400.
It's a hell of a deal he goes i can buy all the grass you know like i'm guessing you didn't you know how it's like not what you say but what you say
yeah i'm guessing that because he was still working on houses in the neighborhood he goes
oh well we'll just put a few more rolls on like at cost he'll do this cash job for jag yeah well when you're buying 100 rolls
the price of getting 103 yeah right yeah and he goes cool and instead of the 1200 bucks i'll
charge you 400 mate we'll roll it out done in half a day and like you know they fell off the
back of a truck that's kind of you know that vibe and jack goes fuck that sounds awesome the whole
family's there they're all so excited i can't't believe it. And he goes, look, mate, all you've got to do is you've got to go down
to Bunnings, buy XYZ thing, kill all this grass, and then.
Okay, hang on.
All right, yeah, yeah.
You've just got to kill all this grass.
You kill it off and I'll put the good shit in.
I'll come around and prep it and I'll put the new stuff in.
I'm not killing anything until I see you ready to go with the revival.
So they exchange phone numbers.
What was his number?
Seven?
He goes, no, mate, I'm like, I think Jag gave him his number
and then he called him.
So it's like the legit number.
Yeah, it's hard to give a fake number when someone does that.
And they go, oh, I forgot the fake numbers.
Oh, sorry.
Yeah, oh, it starts with a one actually or whatever.
They exchanged numbers and the guy goes, I'll text you right now
like the stuff you need to buy to kill it off.
And he goes, you find it at Bunnings, so easy.
He texts him, so it's like the real number and stuff.
Yeah.
Jack goes to Bunnings, buys all the stuff, kills all the grass, texts the guy.
Hey, mate, like, how's this looking?
Sends you a pic.
Nothing.
And I'm guessing the dead grass is better than the not great grass.
You know, suddenly the grass we had wasn't actually that bad.
Oh, yeah, because there was like patches of lawn,
but now it's like the fucking savannah.
No, Sahara.
It's just like there's a giraffe out there.
It's like the fucking desert.
There's nothing.
There's prickly dead fucking white grass and nothing.
Anyway, so Jaguars, fuck, it's been a couple of times.
Has he paid him?
No.
So that's the thing, right?
So where's the hustle come in?
Well, so this guy walks into the house, goes, kill all that.
I'll take care of the rest.
And then ghosted him.
So the crazy thing is this guy, right?
This fuckhead in the land.
He's not a fuckhead.
He's a genius.
He actually gets nothing out of it.
Yeah, it's not a hustle at all.
He didn't get any money.
He literally just pulled a prank on him.
Was it April Fool's?
Was it three weeks ago?
And so Jag like texts, texts him again.
Nothing.
Did he call him?
He's, like, calling him.
He's texting him.
He's going, hey, bro, like, just wondering, like, my grass is dead.
Like, you said you could sort this out for me.
If the guy has to jump off a cliff, would you?
But, like, the guy, this is, the guy has to.
Tony has fucking lost it.
Because the guy hasn't even like ripped him off.
He's game zero.
I'd say this is not a hustle because he has not got anything out of it. That's it.
Like if he went, look, I'll do a 400 for you, mate.
Give me the cash today and I'll organise it.
Then you go, fuck, you've been ripped off.
That really sucks.
He's rolled me $400.
Yeah.
But instead, all he did was pay $40 to Bunnings to buy this poison
and kill all of his grass.
Actually, I've got some theories.
Yeah, okay.
I'd love to hear them.
Theory one.
Yeah.
He works for the poison company.
It's a start-up.
He's like, get this specific one.
Trust me, get that stuff.
Yeah, that'll kill your grass right up.
Option two, he works for a paved courtyard company.
And he's hoping that he goes, well, your grass is dead.
Did you want to give them a call?
Well, then he Googles, oh, yeah, I might just get a courtyard
and say, fuck this grass off.
And then this guy looking really similar, but he goes, oh,
it's his brother.
He's just got a blue hat on today instead of the red hat he was wearing last week.
Isn't that just the-
Fuck, yeah.
Like, literally gets nothing out of it.
It's actually just to fuck with someone.
Like-
I mean, is he fucking with him or has he just got lazy or forgot about it or got busy or-
I mean, he was going to make money out of it.
400 bucks wouldn't cost you the material for that.
Maybe, like, underquoted and then regretted it and then his business partner was like,
man, we've got a fucking big job on.
Well, I mean, he kind of made it seem as though
he was going to steal the grass anyway
and take the cash for himself, do a little cashy,
take the salt out for dinner.
Maybe he got arrested stealing the grass.
Well, so I wonder, yeah, if maybe the place he was working-
The Popo's caught up with him.
This doesn't sound like his first time.
Well, yeah.
I mean, he's just preying on innocent moverinerers, first-time buyers.
But isn't that just like literally he's ghosting.
He hasn't heard anything.
Do you reckon he was the original landscaper?
And so he goes, I'm going to charge the building company to a shit job
and then I can recharge the new person moving in.
See, that makes sense.
If he finished the job. Yeah. So now the new pets and move it in. See, that makes sense. If you finish the job.
Yeah.
Yep.
So now they've just got all this debt.
Because they go, well, we just bought a house.
We can't, like, afford to fix that right now.
Oh, you don't have spare cash when you bought a house.
Yeah, fuck no.
So they go, well, we won't do it.
We'll just leave it for now.
Well, you know, it'll sort itself.
We're about to go into winter anyway, so we'll, you know, fix it up.
And literally they wouldn't have done anything and it would have been, like, livable. We're about to go into winter anyway, so we'll, you know, fix it up. And literally, they wouldn't have done anything
and it would have been, like, livable.
How much did you spend on poison?
$40 or something.
That's $40 you had yesterday.
I mean, could have spent that on Subway.
How much are you spending on Subway?
You've lost touch with the common man.
Yeah, sorry.
Thanks so much
for tuning in.
My You Love to See It
is this podcast
in general
and the community
that it's created
and the lifelong friends
that I've made
along the way.
Tony and Ryan
will be back
Monday the 8th.
Have a great day
and bye for now.