Toni and Ryan - THROWBACK: Toni the Wing(wo)man
Episode Date: September 3, 2023Toni is sick, so we're throwing it back! But never fear - the guys will be back tomorrow! Producer Cam xCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Fi...nd #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello and welcome to another throwback episode of the Tony and Ryan podcast.
It is Producer Cam with you for your Monday.
Hope your weekend has been beautiful.
Today for our throwback episode, we're going to be hearing how Ryan fumbled the perfect
gift for Bridge.
Really could have sealed the deal there.
But, of course, he fumbled it as always.
But starting off, Tony has committed the ultimate sushi train sin.
So on Sunday, across the road, like near my house, there's a big shopping centre.
And there is a sushi place there that do like sushi train.
The Sushi Hero.
Yeah, it's great.
Yes, in the food court.
And I've actually talked to you about it before because I really wanted to go.
It's great.
Yeah.
It's really good.
I've had like takeaway from there before, like the normal hand rolls.
But you've never sat in and done the train.
But I've never done the train there.
So I've done it at other places and I also feel like sushi train is one
of those things where like if you get a good one.
They're so fun.
It's a good one.
Yeah.
But then sometimes you go and there's like not a lot of variety
or there's not whatever.
I feel like if you're having a few beers and there's a few of you,
like it's the fun of the train.
Yeah.
But this is obviously not like a drinking occasion because it is
in a shopping centre. So it's not really like that.
Every occasion is a drinking occasion if you want it to be.
Wow, okay.
But anyway, so on Sunday, Torbs and I were like,
oh, we'll go and do our food shopping.
We had a couple of other errands we needed to run,
and I was like, you know what we should do?
Instead of having lunch at home before we go out,
let's fucking treat ourselves.
Let's train it up, dog.
Let's go to the sushi train.
Absolutely.
I'd wanted to try it for ages.
We've been talking about it for ages.
You'd said it was good.
Yep.
And I love Japanese food.
Have you been to Japan?
I have been to Japan actually.
Yeah, twice.
Ah.
Yep.
Did you base your whole personality around those trips for a while?
Yep.
Yep.
Still do.
Still to this day.
I'm surprised you bring up a story about you being to japan uh but i like love japanese food so i was like this
is fucking all me like i love it torbs is obviously also keen on it so it's it's fun for the whole
family yeah we go cool let's get dressed we'll go over to the sushi train we'll spend a bit of time
there and then we'll kind of move on and do all that shit we get over there and there's a seat like on the side of the so you know how so the
the sushi chain's kind of like a u-shape you know how the bottom of the u is like always where the
chefs are so that's where they're putting new stuff on yeah we mean, here's the first faux pas.
We sat on the other side of the U.
So we were like, so they were putting this.
Yeah.
So you had the leftovers.
We were right before where they would put new stuff on.
So it's done like a full rotation.
So the only stuff getting to you is stuff that other people have let go past.
Yes.
So we're getting some leftovers crappy kind
of stuff going past it was around two o'clock so i think that maybe we did miss that like optimum
sushi train time yeah so you're at the end of the line and it's the end of the lunch peak so they're
really just they're not doing enough a lot of new stuff on.
Okay, yeah.
And the stuff that was kind of coming past had kind of been passed, like, three times
because, like, no one was picking it up.
Of course, it just stays on the cable.
Yeah, so it just stays on the thing.
Anyway, so.
What have you done?
It's, like, coming around slowly.
And as soon as we sat down, we grabbed like three plates
and we're like sharing some stuff and whatever.
And as soon as we sat down, the waiter like comes over
and he's like, oh, the iPads aren't working.
So if you want anything, just let me know.
And I was like, oh, okay, yep, thank you.
But then realised like we didn't have a menu that like
that there was not like oh just let me know what you want like oh a new car like what like
what's the limit to this do you know what i mean a daytime emmy
yeah tell you what i bought with my first paycheck it was an emmy uh anyway so the ipads like aren't
working he i did we couldn couldn't ask for a drink.
We didn't know what there was.
They weren't serving tea or anything, which they normally do.
Can I also add that in a situation like this,
Tony is not the type to want to cause a fuss, want to cause a hassle.
Some other people might say something like,
oh, hey, mate, there's no menu or what are the options?
But if they just say, tell us what you want.
No.
So I didn't want to cause a fuss.
Torb's also my partner.
He is not a fuss causer.
So like he didn't want to say anything either.
I'm surprised you've made it to the studio and not just still sitting there.
Yeah, I know.
Days later.
So we're sitting there and we've got a couple of like the average, not average things like but the normal stuff that would normally be,
the stock stuff, exactly.
But then like the fun stuff is kind of like on its way around.
Oh, great.
So we're like, fuck yeah.
And I see them put like all this hot stuff on, like some karaage chicken,
some like tempura veggies and stuff like that.
I'm like, fuck yeah.
I see them put it on because they're right next to me.
Yeah.
It gets taken on the way through.
So what's... So we're seeing the food get put on and it's coming around
and I'm like, oh, it's almost at us.
But then when it's kind of like right opposite me,
it's still got to do a full half of the you to get back to us
before it's in front of us.
Am I about to find out that you fucked with the rotation
and cut in a line?
Is that what's going to happen here?
So as the food was going past, I was like, all right,
it's getting dire.
We need to take action here.
Girl got to eat.
Yeah.
I was hungry.
We had lots of stuff to do. I was like, we can't just sit here for three fucking hours like hoping that Girl got to eat. Yeah. I was hungry. We had lots of stuff to do.
I was like, we can't just sit here for three fucking hours,
like hoping that good shit comes past.
Yeah.
There was a bit of a break on what was on my side.
So where you would say the sushi train,
what you can take is on your side, like right in front of you.
There was a break in what was right in front of me.
And on the other side, which still had a whole ways to go,
was some hot karaage chicken and some hot tempura veggies.
I'm not proud of it.
I'm not proud of this.
Did you flop your whole person over the thing or did you reach or what did you so a very quick swift from the other side the other side i was desperate okay how close was
it was it just a reach so i could reach it like i just kind of had to like lean up and reach
like standing on your chair oh no no no So like it was just like a long reach.
Yeah.
Like kind of had to, you know, when you kind of like.
Yeah.
You like lift your body off the chair.
There's nothing subtle.
Still not much subtle about it.
Not very subtle.
It wasn't just like a, oh, cheeky.
Like it was a reach.
So for you to get the karaage chicken.
Yeah.
Were there, would have been other people would have seen it coming and you've just fucking reached out in front of them?
Yeah. So between where i stole from yeah and where you
were how many people four did they look at you i just kind of like quickly ducked back down didn't
want to look you didn't i didn't want to face them because the fact that you weren't willing
to face them means that you know what you did.
No, but I know.
That's why I say I'm not proud of this.
But I was like, otherwise, what are we going to do?
Nothing good's coming because all these other people are going to get it on the way through.
And fair enough.
And it was our fault.
Did you choose where you sat?
Yes.
Did you realize where you'd sat before you'd sat down?
No, I didn't even think.
I was just like, oh, can we just sit anywhere?
And they were like, oh, yeah, just down here.
And I was like, okay.
And we just went right to the back because I was like, that'll be fine.
Anyway, so all I could think after we did that was how fucked off I would be
if somebody else did that and it was like about to come to me.
I'm like sitting there patiently and I'm waiting for the sushi to come that I've got my eye
on or whatever and that they took it.
Isn't the golden rule, don't do to others what you would not like done to yourself.
I'm sure that's not the exact wording.
But, yep.
You know what I'm trying to say.
And the fact that you already knew as you were doing it.
I knew.
That if someone did this to me, I'd be so fucked off.
Well, because I'd be like, fuck, I really wanted to eat that thing.
Have you been to Vic Garden since?
Are you welcome back there?
Probably not.
I don't think I'd ever be allowed to sit down at the sushi train again.
But if I was you, I wouldn't want to.
Does the restaurant know what you did?
I don't know if anyone saw.
No one worded me out because I was like, am I going to get in trouble for doing this?
You wouldn't get worded.
Like, okay.
Put yourself in the position of the other people.
Okay.
You'd be fucked off, but you wouldn't say anything.
No.
Well, I definitely wouldn't.
But you wouldn't forget it either.
No.
And if you, and because in that shopping center, there's like the food place, there's movies,
there's a shopping center that came out.
Like you kind of see that after a while, like the same faces and whatever.
Those people, you're going to wander in and they're going to be like, oh. of see that after a while, like, the same faces and whatever. Oh.
Those people, you're going to wander in and they're going to be like,
Oi.
That's that bitch.
That's that bitch that stole the fucking karaage chicken.
She's the sushi train leaner.
The leaner?
That's who you are now.
I'm really not proud of it. That's your personal brand.
But there was no other option.
Well, there was.
You could have asked for chicken karaage from the chef who gave you the option.
You could have waited for it to come around.
You could have sat in the right seat.
There was no way that it would have come around.
No, there was no way it was coming around.
It would have gotten picked up on the way.
It was so delicious.
There was a KFC within metres.
I wonder if they get the popcorn chicken.
Surely not.
I was at Vic Gardens yesterday.
Yeah.
And this guy was eating popcorn chicken.
This white guy was eating popcorn chicken with chopsticks.
Good for them.
From KFC.
It's a really good way to eat because it slows you down
so you don't eat as fast.
And also then you don't get greasy fingers.
I respect that.
So this is how I saw it playing out.
He's like, well, as someone who eats a lot of KFC,
I always feel like a bit of shame and a bit of like,
oh, it's a bit of a naughty treat.
KFC, I would never eat KFC in public.
KFC is a home food.
Thank you.
Yep.
And so I reckon he's gone, oh, I don't want to be that guy.
I'll dress it up with some chopsticks.
Dress it up.
Because if you're eating karaage chicken at the sushi train a metre away
with chopsticks, 100% fine.
But if you're eating popcorn chicken, oh, come on, mate.
Do you know what is funny about that?
Is that he's obviously gone to the Japanese place and been like,
can I have some chopsticks?
Can I have some chopsticks?
Yeah, do you want some sushi?
No, I'm just going to get some KFC.
Yeah, I'm getting KFC.
And I looked at him and was like, mate, you're not fooling anyone.
Oh, I do respect it.
It is a good way to eat.
And you can't eat popcorn chicken with a fork.
I feel really I knew exactly what I had done.
And even Torbs was like, oh.
So he knew.
Yeah, I knew too. It's not a shock. It's not a a shock that's why i wanted to share it i was like well thank you for sharing i know luckily no one in australia knows who i am
well they do they just they're not like tony lodge podcast they're like tony lodge
karage eater everyone's thought about it don't get me wrong yeah that's what i mean everyone's
but no one's done it.
I'm the only one, I think.
You're listening to the Tony and Ryan podcast.
Do you think you're a great friend?
Now, this is a question for you, Tony Lodge,
and you listening to the podcast.
Do you think you're a good friend?
And what is it that you do that makes you a good friend?
Is it being there in the tough times?
Is it being supportive and encouraging to people around you?
Do you think you're a good friend, Ryan?
So obviously I'm thinking about it right now.
Everybody listening is thinking about it right now.
Do you think you're a good friend?
At times because often I've been moving around for so long,
I've missed a lot of birthdays, missed a lot of moments.
That's hard.
And sometimes it's not like the birthdays and the weddings
but it's like the small little bits in between is where you really
like get to know someone.
So I feel like bad that I like aren't there as much.
But I do feel like if people ever ask me anything,
I'm like always happy to help, always willing to do something.
And I love I've got a lot of friends' jobs and I don't know why that,
I've got you jobs.
Yeah.
I get like a sense of pride in being able to like help.
Yeah, totally.
And I used to, when we were younger, I used to be the guy where people were like,
oh, I want to get this job.
What do I put on my resume?
And I'm like, oh, I'd love to help.
Yeah.
So I feel like that's my area of like service, helping out, gifts.
Definitely.
Am I pumping my own tires or does that feel about right?
No, definitely.
Yeah.
I love telling people what to do.
But like I would say that your
love language, I mean obviously I don't know
romantically if it's different but
the way that you show me that
you love me is yeah, acts of service
you guys do little things, you're always checking
in. If I'm like oh I'm just like
struggling with this thing, you're like let me take it off your
plate or let me help you out or how can I do that
for you? So I think that's accurate.
Do you think you're a good friend, Tony Lodge?
I think in the past I've been a really shitty friend.
Why is that?
I think just because I was, and this is not me trying to make excuses,
but I think I just had like a lot of anxiety and I really struggled being
there for other people because I wasn't there for myself.
You know, like I think I just.
If you don't love yourself, how can others love you?
Exactly.
Yeah.
It's cliche, but there's a lot of truth.
But in the last probably three, four years, I've been making lots of very concerted effort with friends to make sure that I do catch up with them or message them at random times to check in with how they're going
or if they say, oh, I've got this big thing coming up at work,
I make sure that I, like, remember to check in with them and stuff.
But same with you.
I've moved around a lot so we've missed lots of big moments.
But I think that at the moment, yes.
Let me share with people in the TARPA community what a great friend
Toni Lodge is to me. Is this one of those anti things where you're like, community. What a great friend Tony Lodge is to me.
Is this one of those anti things where you're like,
she's such a great friend.
She borrowed my car and put no fuel in it or something like that.
First of all, I don't own a car.
Second of all, I've borrowed your car and have not put fuel in it.
So I feel like there's a few deep-seated little issues there.
Tony's at my house the other day and she leans in.
I wouldn't say a whisper, but it was a very low sort of, hey, Ryan.
Tony leans into me and says, I'm going to get you laid.
You said that, didn't you?
I did say that, yeah, verbatim.
I'm going to get you laid.
And I thought not only is Tony a great friend,
but apparently now a wingman.
I try. A wingman. I try.
A wingwoman.
Wing person.
Wing person.
So Bridget has a few cookbooks.
My wife has a few cookbooks in the kitchen.
And they're like up on a bench, on a shelf.
On a shelf.
Yeah.
And Tony goes, oh, the lady who wrote that book.
Julia Ostro.
Julia Ostro has just brought out a new one.
And for people in that world, Julia, like beautiful, Jeff.
Honestly, if you don't follow her on Instagram, you need to.
Like she's fucking awesome.
She's got three cookbooks now.
So she's just brought out a new one.
And Tony, you say, oh, she's just got out this new one.
Bridget obviously likes the old one.
I'll order you the new one and say it's from you
and Bridget will love you for it because it's this beautiful book.
I've just ordered one for myself and one for Jane.
I'll make it three.
I'll give Bridget one and you can just like she'll think
what a beautiful gift.
Yeah, and how thoughtful that you would see that and go, oh, my God.
And I was like, Tony, great idea.
Maybe I will get laid. So I ordered it. So Tony orders it. And paid for it. And I was like, Tony, great idea. Maybe I will get laid.
So I ordered it.
So Tony orders it.
And paid for it.
And paid for it.
Yesterday, I'm chatting to you on the phone.
Yep.
And it's actually an interesting time to have you on the phone,
on loudspeaker, because, oh, there's a knock at the door.
Yeah.
Who is it?
I'm like, oh, maybe it's the book.
Yeah.
And it was. And I was like, oh, Tony's a knock at the door. Yeah. Who is it? I'm like, oh, maybe it's the book. Yeah. And it was.
And I was like, oh, Tony's like set this up.
She can hear how this plays out in real time.
Yeah.
So I walk.
I hadn't, by the way.
Yeah.
I walk into Bridget and I was like, hey, something's right.
And she's like, what is it?
I haven't ordered anything.
And I was like, oh, someone has got you a present.
And then I pull the book out of the booktopia box and she sees it
and not only is like it's great recipes like the touch of the book it's a lovely photography it's
just a beautiful even if you never like you know like coffee table book even if it's sat there and
you never used it it's just a beautiful thing to have in the house it is really nice yeah and
bridget's like oh ryan you shouldn't have. What a great idea.
And she started giving me like, oh, I love you so much.
What a thankful gift.
And I was like, fuck, maybe Tony was right.
Tony whispered, I'm going to get you laid.
Yeah.
And here I am in the good books.
Yep.
Literally, the good cookbooks.
Yeah, I'm in the good cookbooks.
And just as Bridge kind of starts giving me this beautiful like, oh, thank you, Ryan.
Tony, who's on loudspeaker,
goes, I bought it.
I paid for it.
It was me.
It wasn't him.
He's an arsehole.
I bought it for you, Bridge.
It was all me.
No, that's not what happened.
Bridget was like, you do.
No, she was very loving.
And then you, supposed wingman.
Yeah.
I'm a good friend.
Yells.
And then Bridget goes, oh, I thought Ryan must have got it.
And then Tony, do you think Ryan would ever actually do something nice for you?
I'm a way better friend to you, Bridget, than Ryan is.
The book's from me.
I hope you enjoy it.
We all know Ryan would never do this for you.
Actually.
I'm not saying you're wrong.
And then she said, you're right.
So, I mean, I think you're so on your own seed there. I've never said that before.
I'm not disagreeing with anything that's been said in terms of accuracy.
What my beef is, is that you were like, let me be the wingman,
let me be a good friend, I'm going to do this good deed
and I'll let you take the credit for this one.
Yeah.
And how did that go?
Were you able to let your friend shine?
No.
The thing is is that I'm a very excitable gift giver.
Yeah.
Like I'm the kind of gift giver that like if it's arrived,
I want to give it to you two weeks early.
Yep.
Like I don't care.
I just really want to see the look on your face.
Like I get so much joy out of sending people gifts.
Like how nice is it when you make people feel good?
Well, I felt that feeling.
Okay, well then you come up with your own fucking present
and you fucking send it to her, okay?
Okay.
If you want the fucking present.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Buy it yourself.
Is that what you're trying to say?
If you want the present.
Oh, my God.
What's happened to you?
Previous Tony who was a good friend and could remember stuff.
If you want the kudos.
I've never said kudos before, but it's the only word I can think of.
If you want the kudos, you buy the gift.
Maybe we could set something else up for you.
No, you've done enough.
Oh.
Because I actually would suggest it had the reverse effect
because she loved the book, but she was so pro-Tony
and so anti-Ryan in the house yesterday.
It was unbearable.
I was like, what is this?
The TARPA Facebook group?
LAUGHTER
Thanks for joining me for this Monday edition Yes, the TARPA Facebook group.
Thanks for joining me for this Monday edition of a throwback episode of the Tony and Ryan podcast.
Our You'll Love to See It for today comes from our Facebook group
and Scott Nichol with a simple yet absolutely beautiful message,
and Scott has written,
My You'll Love to See It is KFC in New Zealand has been on an absolute
banger of a run lately.
We've had mashies,
the hot honey double down, and now we have hot and spicy back on the menu. You absolutely love
to see it. Hot and spicy. You do love to see that, Scott. I'm producer Cam, and I'm off to
KFC right now to grab a three-piece feed. Enjoy your Monday, guys. I'll see you all later. Bye now.