Toni and Ryan - WTF is British Pizza?
Episode Date: August 22, 2023What pizza are you and where are you from? And a bit of a customer service mishap if you ask me! Love u xoCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! ...Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
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Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast.
My name is Ryan.
This is Dr. Arthur Tony Lodge.
Hi.
And we are calling Rhys who is in Warragul.
Ooh, Warragul.
Star FM country.
Disability Connect Victoria, are you speaking with Rhys?
Hi.
Oh, Rhys, we've called your work number.
We've called the work phone.
That's my only number.
I'm sorry.
I loved the professionalism though.
Yeah, that was good.
Thank you.
Thank you. thank you.
Off-air chat.
Should we beep that out for you?
Do you not want your workplace?
It depends if you want to let me have some shameless self-promotion.
Oh, well, then no, we'll leave it in.
Rhys is trying to run a business here, mate.
No, I'm just making sure that your boss isn't going to go,
Rhys, shouldn't you have been working during that time?
No, no, no. I am my boss.
It's okay.
Oh, okay.
Rhys is on business.
All right.
I'll poke a hole in that condom.
Tony's not the only one that runs their own business here, apparently.
So look out.
There you go.
Rhys, will you approve this podcast?
Fuck yes, I will.
Fuck yeah.
I probably shouldn't swear if I'm leaving the business, Damien.
No, fuck.
Hey, it's Rhys from Victoria and I approve this podcast.
Yeah.
All right, coming up today.
If someone told you that you needed help, no, that they needed help.
Okay.
Yeah, I was like, righto.
You need help.
That's just aggressive.
If someone told you that they needed help, would you take that seriously?
Yeah, but I don't know.
You know how with like the are you okay, like,
and people like encouraging you to ask if people are okay.
Yep.
Once a year. Once a year.
Once a year.
Obviously, don't ever do it.
That's coming up, actually.
Everyone ramp up.
But they don't teach you what to do if they say no.
Yeah.
Are you okay?
No.
Well, I asked you.
Well, yeah, all the best with that, bro.
I asked.
So when someone goes, I need help, and you go, do you?
Yeah.
I can't agree with them.
Well, I.
Can you agree with someone?
Let's role play.
You ask the question.
Yeah.
Oh, are you all right?
Sorry.
Are you okay?
Actually, I'm not really.
Yeah, I know.
I could have told you that.
This time say that you're going to therapy.
Like you say, I need help.
Oh, I need help.
Obviously.
Yeah.
You're always the last to know.
Yeah.
Well, I do have a story about therapy coming up.
So thanks for letting me know that I need to go.
Because I already...
You're good though, man.
Yeah.
First of all, there's an issue here.
And let me know when you hear it.
Guys, we've got a BuzzFeed quiz.
Oh.
Tell us your pizza preferences
and we'll tell you if your tastes are
either Australian, American
or British.
Oh, okay.
Any issues? Can anyone say any issues?
No Italian on the list? Yeah, we'll just want Italian
right up there. Yeah, surely.
Yeah.
Surely. Yeah, I reckon A, Italian should be all three answers.
And not only are they not, but they're not even an option.
I think that it should just be, like, surely it should just be,
like, American and Italian.
Because, like, an American pizza is different to, like,
a standard Italian pizza.
How is Australian on the list?
Oh, if you like pineapple, it turns out that you like.
And what's British pizza?
Yeah.
Well, I've got the quiz.
Are you ready to find out, Tony Lodge, if you are British, American,
or Australian and certainly not Italian?
I mean, I am on the record of saying about homemade pizza
that I think it's the biggest rot in all of history,
Italian, American, English and Australian history.
But I do, I am partial to it.
My favourite pizza place is Shawcross.
I've talked about this on the pod before.
Yeah, very good.
So I've done the quiz.
Oh, what did you get?
Italian.
I don't know if this is offensive.
Oh.
Actually, how many fucking countries can we slander in one segment?
Oh, didn't know what you were going to say then.
How many?
Oh, yeah.
I got American and I was a bit offended by that.
And is me being offended by that offensive to Americans?
See, I'm sitting here hoping that I do get American
because what's a fucking English pizza?
I don't know.
What is it? An English McMuffin with tomato sauce grease on the top? Like, I don't want to that I do get American because what's a fucking English pizza? I don't know.
What is it?
An English McMuffin with tomato sauce squeezed on the top?
Like, I don't want to get that as an answer.
It's a jam and scone.
Yeah.
Like, oh, that sounds really good actually.
Yeah, that is really good.
We could get a scone after this.
Yeah.
I mean, it'd be fucking rude not to at this point.
Yeah.
First up, what type of pizza crust do you prefer?
Cheesy.
They've got stuffed crust, extra cheesy.
Yeah.
Traditional hand-tossed, thin and crispy, or the deep dish thick and doughy.
I either enjoy thin and crispy or stuffed crust.
You're going to have to pick one.
And while you ponder that, I am actually going to put a link to a TARPers-only link in the show notes and in Facebook so we can all do the quiz and compare.
So they now have a private thing so we can send our private link.
So it's just our answers.
Like us as Tarpers.
That's cool.
I'm going to go the stuffed cheesy crust.
Okay.
Because I'm in a Domino's mood.
Yeah.
Domino's not like Dominatrix, obviously. Oh, yeah.
What's your favorite pizza sauce?
Yeah.
Domino's, not like dominatrix, obviously.
Oh, yeah.
What's your favorite pizza sauce?
Do you want the classic marinara sauce, the barbecue sauce,
a pesto sauce, or the classic white base?
Classic red.
Classic red.
Yeah.
So like the marinara.
Yeah.
Because I don't, I'm not a fan of like a barbecue base. Like, you know, when sometimes you get like a barbecue meat lovers,
I'm not a fan of barbecue sauce.
I think it tastes like sweet dick.
Yeah.
It's not for me.
Well, I'm on the record of saying I fucking love sweet dick.
Yeah.
And I love barbecue sauce and anything.
In fact, I've once ordered stuff purely to be a vessel for the barbecue sauce,
which I wished to consume.
Also, it turns out barbecue sauce is just garlic and onion,
which is two things I can't have.
Oh, no.
And sugar, isn't it?
Yeah.
It's the triple banger. It's the triple banger.
It's the triple banger.
I just think it's too sticky.
And, like, whenever I get, like, we've made ribs at home
and I've obviously had ribs out and stuff.
And I like them, but sometimes the sweet, sticky sauce,
it's just, like, too much.
Yeah.
Yep.
But I'm a tomato sauce girl but i'm a i'm a red
base girl on i don't think i've ever had a pesto based pizza it sounds like something you would
get from like um a restaurant as like an entree or something and if you get the right things on
top of it it can be quite nice that does sound nice but i don't think i've ever had it. Also, can I just add, Cam, have a look at this.
How crook are the photos in the BuzzFeed page?
Yeah, it's like a Yelp review page.
It's like someone's gone to the bottom end of Yelp.
It's crook.
Oh, my God.
My space quality is so bad.
It's there in the link so you can go along yourself.
That's like a really early picture you'd post on Instagram.
Yeah.
You know when you scroll to the bottom of someone's Instagram
and there's a really heavily Instagram filter.
And they used to have the border on them as well.
Expro.
What was the other one?
Expro 2 and Lo-Fi.
Yeah.
Paris.
Yeah.
Someone's a traveller.
Yeah.
What toppings do you enjoy the most on your pizza?
There is pepperoni and sausage. There is pineapple and ham. Someone's a traveller. What toppings do you enjoy the most on your pizza?
There is pepperoni and sausage.
There is pineapple and ham.
There is garlic, prawn and basil,
which if you're in the right mood sounds fucking all right to me.
And the last one is spinach, mushrooms and feta.
That's definitely a picture of a quiche they've used.
It is.
Look, that does not look like pizza.
It's a pochettia. It's a poliola. Yeah.
Focaccia.
Focaccia.
It's a focaccia.
I like a Hawaiian, like the ham and pineapple.
But I think that you only ever have like one piece of that when like you have pizza with kids.
Yeah.
Like if you're ordering pizza for the family and you go, oh, yeah, we'll go a deep pan Hawaiian to keep them happy.
So I think I'm going to go the meat and sausage,
like the pepperoni one, yeah. Good call.
What's your go-to cheese?
Mozzarella, cheddar, burrata or a blue cheese?
Oh, can I have all four?
Because I'm a cheese girl, as you know.
Mozzarella is yum and stringy, but it's not very tasty.
I love burrata on a pizza.
I'm going to say burrata.
What is your stance on pineapple as a topping?
Here are your options.
Love it.
It adds additional sweetness.
Hate it.
Fruit it has no place on a pizza.
It's all right.
Or never tried it, but I'm open to new flavors.
What the?
Who fucking wrote this quiz?
I know.
They phoned it in.
Her name's Julia.
Julia and Julia's really...
Her food blog's really taking a dive.
But I feel like...
Well, not BuzzFeed.
Julia's not dead.
May she rest in pizza.
May she rest in pineapple. May she rest in pineapple.
May she rest in pineapple.
Tony, you love it.
I'm clicking you love it.
Yeah, click I love it because none of the other weird official answers
that they've written feel right.
Also, when you have multiple choice, you need, like, agree, disagree,
strong agree.
When you have never had it but open to it, like,
what the fuck does that mean?
Yeah, I don't know.
How do you feel about adding extra spices and herbs to your pizza?
Chili flakes, yes.
Bring on the spice?
Yeah.
Okay.
I like a shake of chili flakes on the top of a pizza.
Nummies.
What is your...
Oh, I like that sound you're making.
Well, I know that this is a...
There is no correct answer for Tony Lodge. Well, a, there is no correct answer for Tony Lodge.
Well, there's a fifth not listed answer for Tony Lodge.
What is your preferred method of cooking pizza?
I'll stop you right there.
Tony's preferred method is ordered.
Yes.
But it's baking in a conventional oven,
grilling for that smoky flavor,
a wood-fired oven for an authentic taste,
or using a pizza stone for a steel and – hang on.
Let me – using a pizza stone or steel for a crispy crust.
What do they do, like, when you get pizza?
Is that an oven, like a conventional oven?
Yeah.
Oh, but then – because I don't like the, you know,
how you have to be in a specific kind of mood for the wood-fired,
like bubbly one.
I'm going to go pizza stone.
Yeah.
We used to have a pizza stone at home and it was the greatest investment
ever until I broke it in half.
We've thought about getting, because you can buy pizza stones,
like for your Weber.
Yeah.
Like we have a Weber and like it fits on your.
A Weber's an elite choice, a pizza stone, that combo.
Yeah, because you could just pop that out in the backyard
and just fucking pop it.
Yeah, that'd be pretty good.
Yeah, I'd go pizza stone.
Finally, what side.
Fucking hell, they're milking the fucking questions, eh?
What side dish do you enjoy pairing with your pizza?
Hot chips, onion rings, garlic bread or salad?
Garlic bread.
Thank you.
What are those other three?
Fuck that.
Oh, we're done.
Why would you have chips on the side of a pizza?
That's so upsetting.
And I bet you if you got like the chips from Domino's,
they'd be like done in the oven and they'd be like a bit yucky,
a bit like cardboardy.
Anyway.
Cam, play the trumpet real quick.
Tony Lodge is Australian.
Oh, I did say the pineapple.
Yeah.
You have a taste for adventure when it comes to pizza.
Your love for toppings.
I picked like the blandest answer.
Your love for toppings like pineapple and ham indicate that maybe
that was the only question that...
Can I have a prize?
Because did I not say at the very beginning,
I said I bet you if you pick pineapple, then it means you're Australian.
Wait.
Toppings like pineapple or ham indicate you also enjoy
a sweet and savoury combination.
You might also appreciate barbecue sauce.
Julia, get a new job.
As an Aussie, you enjoy thin and crispy crusts,
even though you didn't pick it, you did say that,
and grilling your pizza for that extra smell.
This has nothing to do with the answers you put in.
Yeah.
A wild stab in the dark.
Don't forget to add some hot chips on the side
for the full Aussie experience.
What the fuck?
Okay, you know how before you said,
oh, we'll put the link in our show notes so everyone can do it?
No.
No.
That is not allowed to go anywhere.
That link is cancelled.
We're cancelling this quiz.
Julia and Julia, no.
I never thought I would say this, but that is worse than the shit quiz.
What a compliment for the shit quiz.
I know. That's why I'm saying I can't believe it. Should we all go compliment for the shit quiz. I know.
That's why I'm saying I can't believe it.
Should we all go and troll the author, Julia?
No.
No.
Let's see what the comments say.
She's a scamster.
Oh, hang on.
Oh, no.
The comments.
Me chooses thin and crispy.
Answer.
You hate thin and crispy.
Yeah, Julia, you cooked the goose on that one.
We fucked it right up.
Yeah.
But she's still employed, so that's good.
I mean, you can do anything over there at BuzzFeed, apparently.
Hang on.
No, I'm not done yet.
Oh, okay.
I pick as Italian as possible for all options, and yet I get American.
Even for BuzzQuiz, this is undeniably bad.
Oh, no, that's operator error, because Italian wasn't even an option of the outcome.
They lost before the title concluded.
Yeah, you didn't even read the thing.
We can't blame Julia for everything.
All right, all right, all right.
Hey, it's Rhys from Victoria and you are listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon.
Hopefully none of them are subjected to that pizza quiz.
Emma Koob.
Good on you, Emma.
Thank you.
The big Koob.
Shannon Barker.
Oh, I hardly know her.
Bryson Johnson.
Yeah, was Barker a nickname from her boyfriend or was that her last name?
Shannon Barker.
I Barker.
What?
Skip that.
Bryson Johnson, which sounds like a fake name.
Maddie C.
And Daniela Ustari.
Thank you so much.
Is that Bryson Johnson?
Bryson Johnson.
That sounds like what I would call myself if I was trying to not give my name out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Bryson Johnson.
Yeah.
Just one ticket to the X-rated film.
Thank you.
I made the reservation under Bryson Johnson.
Bryson Johnson.
I will go the extra long massage today, that sweetheart.
Can you imagine if like,
you know when celebrities like
use a fake name at a hotel,
like they call themselves like Bambi
or fucking whatever.
Yeah.
So now if you ever need to find
Ryan and I at a hotel,
you better booking under Bryson Johnson.
Or the brother of my dog,
Bronson Johnson. Bronson Johnson.
Bronson Johnson.
Bronson and Bryson Johnson.
That is very unfortunate.
No, can you imagine if you named your kids Bryson and Bronson Johnson?
Poor kids.
TonyandRyan.com.au.
There you can submit your confessions and also buy our merch.
The pre-order's done, but now you can still purchase the shirt the shirt the hoodie the socks or the cap yeah nice yeah yep yep yeah
um your hoodie's at my house by the way i keep forgetting to bring it that sounds really like
my bikini's still in the back of your car don't start no don't did we tell that story on the
podcast yeah like many times. It's so funny.
I was accused of cheating by my wife who left her own clothes in the back of my car.
Yeah, and that's what happens when you buy like all the gear,
no idea.
Like you go like, yep, we're going to go swimming every day.
Then three months later you go, well, I wouldn't have done that.
There's a bikini in the back of your car.
Who's are they?
Remember that time we said we were going to go swimming
after work every day and never went?
And the tags are still on, the bikini and the car.
I said before, if someone said they needed help,
would you take that seriously?
As in like if someone goes, hey, just like wondering about this thing,
you would go, okay, you obviously have like reached out for a reason
in our team.
So it's like obviously you and I, Tony and Ryan,
and then we have producer Cam.
And we have like a bit of like a rule or like a – not a rule
because that makes it sound awful, but like if you need help, just ask.
Like if you've had a shit sleep, let us know because then we can kind
of be like helpful about that.
Don't suffer in silence.
Yeah, because otherwise there's nothing worse when you go like,
oh, is everything okay?
And they go, yep.
And then you go, oh, I don't want to piss them off more.
Like have I done something?
Anyway, or if you were like going to call customer service
and, you know, oh, I've got a concern about this thing
or I need to pick something up.
And you would hope that they'd be like, let me help you
and address your concerns.
Absolutely.
So if I said, like, my car's broken down, what would you say?
Oh, that sucks.
Do you need a lift somewhere?
Yeah, you wouldn't go, oh, I wouldn't worry about that.
Oh, I might say that though.
No.
Okay, you're obviously the wrong person to ask.
Oh, no, this is, I'd say 90% of conversations Tony and I have.
Tony goes, oh, Ryan, should I worry about this?
And I go, no.
Nah, I wouldn't worry about that.
It doesn't matter how worrisome the thing actually is.
You go, oh, mate.
It's like the boy that cried wolf. Yeah yeah there's probably something that you should worry about
and my default is like nah it's fine it's you're like tony's worrying about something it's probably
okay yeah it'll be fine um but i am i've talked about this i think but i've recently started
going back and seeing my therapist um just been like really stressed a lot in the brain
um just needed to kind of keep the old brain in check. You said something I really liked the other day and was like, oh, just because you're
fit doesn't mean you stop going to the gym.
It's like, you know, keep the thing ticking along.
I've got a, do you want a new one?
Oh, always.
Love a quote.
Where is it?
Okay, here we go.
Happiness is like putting clean sheets on your bed.
The only way to enjoy them is to be in them.
However, you do need to wash your sheets every now and then.
So happiness isn't about staying happy.
It's understanding that after a while everything gets dirty
and just learning how to clean it.
I really like that.
Is that a good analogy?
Yeah, I do really like that.
And so me kind of going to therapy is me being like, hey, I need help.
Like I need to just like help get my brain in check, wash my sheets.
And it also means that for me when I need to go to therapy,
it's because I'm like pretty anxious, pretty stressy,
and just feeling a bit out of sorts.
Like I need help.
You okay, mate?
And, yeah, I'm all good.
I've just got a lot on.
We're busy and we're like traveling heaps for work and, you know,
like there's just a lot on all the time.
But like same with everyone.
Yeah.
Everyone's got a million fucking balls in the air all the time
and you're just like hoping to fuck that you don't drop something
and it doesn't break.
Yeah.
But anyway, so this place that I go to, it's like a – not a chain
because that makes it sound like it's like the McDonald's of therapy.
Do they do it in a drive-thru?
They've got like a punch card.
If you go five times, the six hunts free.
I wish that that was the case.
But they've got like a few offices in their like network.
Yeah, sure.
I feel like in the medical profession,
network is probably more applicable than a franchise.
Franchise because it's not a boost juice.
Yeah.
So that would be lovely.
Imagine if you went into therapy, you sat down,
they gave you a boost juice and you were just like, fuck it.
Cue it.
Yeah.
This is so much better than the fucking shit unfiltered water
that they give you.
Anyway, so when you, like, make a booking,
there's, like, the drop-down menu of, like,
the different practices or whatever.
You have to pick the right one.
And then they send, like, heaps of text reminders,
and it's actually really good.
So they obviously cater to people that are anxious and stressy.
And they go, this is the address of the practice.
Here's a photo of the front door.
There's parking around the corner.
This is like the code to get in the front door.
Like they give you heaps of info.
And this is right up your area, right?
This is like perfect for me.
Because if I got multiple texts from the therapist,
I'd be like, you're overwhelming me.
And I get it.
Yeah, I get what you mean.
Stop blowing me up.
So at the first initial thing, they send you the photo and how to get in.
And then the other ones are like, oh, don't forget you've got an appointment with blah at blah time on blah day at blah location.
It is very like thoughtful and stuff, isn't it?
Well, yeah, because I think like, I mean, also because it's so hard to get an appointment.
If people do need to cancel, at least then they don't just forget
and not go and then, like, someone else could have had that appointment,
you know?
Anyway, so I get the text last week, the day before my appointment,
and it says, like, yep, your appointment's with blah.
I go, check, this time, check, This date, check. This location, wrong location.
So have you done the wrong thing on the drop down or did they stuff it up?
Well, I don't know.
Who's to say?
I don't know.
And so immediately I get a tight chest.
I start to panic.
I'm like, oh, my God, what do I do?
And then I'm like, okay, no, Tony, you're okay.
Oh, is this like a test?
Can you imagine?
Let's see how cooked she really is.
And I go, okay, instead of like panicking and letting this get away from me,
I'm just going to call them.
Great idea.
Yeah.
Great idea.
Yeah.
So I'm like, you know what?
I've obviously picked the wrong thing on the drop-down menu or whatever.
I've booked the wrong thing.
Let me just call them.
So I call them and this lovely girl answers the phone.
And I go, oh, I'm so glad.
I'm obviously beside myself about having to fucking ring them.
This sounds not mean, but they'd be used to getting,
they'd get some calls, right?
So this is what I thought.
She asked for my details.
She's like, I can't give you anything, so I have to give her my name,
my date of birth and everything.
She's like, oh, yep, I can see you here in the system, Tony.
How are you?
And I was like, oh, well, yeah, sorry.
I'm just like, yeah.
She's like, how can I help you?
And I was like, yeah, sorry.
I just got the text about my appointment reminder for tomorrow.
She goes, oh, yeah, with blah?
And I go, yep.
She goes, oh, at this time?
And I go, yep. And she goes, oh,, with blah. And I go, yep. She goes, oh, at this time? And I go, yep.
And she goes, oh, on this date?
And I go, yep.
And then she goes, oh, at blah.
And I go, yeah, see, that's the thing.
Like, I don't go to the Perth one.
I go to the Sydney one.
And she goes, oh, yeah, I wouldn't worry about that.
Do you know who you're speaking to?
Do you know what industry you're in?
I just don't worry about it.
If I wasn't worrying about things, I wouldn't be booking and making a booking.
I wouldn't be coming, babe.
Wouldn't be coming, babe.
I wouldn't be required.
Wouldn't be worrying about it.
And she wasn't, like, nasty or rude.
She's like, oh, I wouldn't worry about that.
Well, I'm already doing it.
Why do you think I'm doing it?
I'm on the phone, babe.
I'm on the phone because I'm worrying about it.
And I was like, sorry?
Like, immediately I was like, what?
So she'd like disregard the text, just come to the place you booked.
Well, she goes, oh, I'd say it's just an oversight.
I wouldn't worry about it.
And I was like, okay.
You're not in the seat, doll.
I'm not asking if you would worry about it. I'm telling you that I am like, okay. You're not in the seat, Darl. I'm not asking if you would worry about it.
I'm telling you that I am worried about it.
And I'm calling you and being like, I just need to double check.
Like, don't tell me to just, like, not worry about it because I'm,
like, I'm asking you.
Like, imagine if I was like, oh, like, can I have a sip of your water?
And you went, oh, don't worry about it.
I'm like, oh, well, no, I'm, like, asking you.
Can I sip it or can I not sip it?
Yeah, like, what's the answer?
So which place do I need to go to? oh well no i'm like what do i can i say something yeah like what's the answer did you like that but
so which place do i need to go to so i was like oh but like is it fine because i don't want to
get because like if you don't rock up they charge you yeah so i'm like and they don't just charge
you they charge you and so i'm like i'm actually not willing to risk two hundred dollars thank you
on like this being the wrong thing yeah and then she goes, yeah, I think it's just an oversight.
Like I'm sure it's fine.
And I was like, well, yeah.
So like is it the right thing that I've booked?
And she goes, look, if you don't get an update, no news is good news.
If you don't hear from us again, it'll be fine.
And I was like, with all due respect, this is actually supposed
to be the least stressful part of my week.
I'm supposed to to glide in there.
Someone holds me down.
And I lay in a warm bed of water.
And then I get a boost juice and everything's perfect.
I'm almost waiting for her to go, oh, fuck, babe.
We should call someone.
This is the call.
This is the call.
And then, yeah, and she's just like, yeah, no news is good news, babe,
so thank you so much for calling.
And I was like, thanks.
And I just hung up the phone and I was like, well,
I guess I won't worry about it.
But then have they sent you photos of parking of another place?
No, so they only send that when you first become a patient
and then weekly you kind of get the like
reminder text with the address in it so were you you go to leave your house obviously three hours
early and you because you need to have time to drive to the other one well yeah because what if
the other one is where i'm supposed to i'm so i've got to fly to perth but i'm supposed to be in perth
and anyway and like so then she just goes i wouldn't worry about it. She hangs up and I go, okay, like, all right.
And then I was just like, well, I can't call again.
Well, I'm just going to call her again.
She's going to answer and she's going to be like,
yeah, I told you not to worry, doll.
I said don't worry and I don't change my opinion.
I still think don't worry.
Yeah, and she was literally just like, like I said, she wasn't nasty.
She wasn't like, yeah, like you need to chill out.
She was just like, yeah, I wouldn't worry about it.
And I was like, you don't know your audience, but that's okay.
And then it ended up being like they ended up sending like three hours later
another reminder text with the updated thing.
With the correct information?
Yeah, and I was like, she's had to go into the system and do that.
Yeah, she's, yeah.
Like, she's had to fucking tick something or untick something.
I reckon.
You know, like when the phone rings, she always goes, oh, so who's that?
And the colleague, she goes, oh, it's just this girl.
I wanted to know which one it was.
I told her not to worry.
And the other person's gone, I reckon probably fucking.
Yeah.
And they've gone, what was her name?
And they've gone, oh, yeah.
And she's gone, yeah.
And she's done, like the other person's done it. And she's gone, what was her name? And they've gone, oh, yeah. And she's gone, yeah. And she's done, like the other person's done it.
She's gone, yeah.
I wouldn't worry about that, but I might just fucking do it.
As much as I love the picture of like, here's what the parking's like,
the fact that I assume you weren't there yesterday scoping it out for yourself anyway.
They don't listen to this podcast, obviously.
They need to be doing their homework.
But it all worked out fine.
Yeah, so I ended up at the right place,
didn't get unnecessarily charged for an appointment
that I was supposed to be in Perth for, which is good.
And the time difference as well, that kills you.
And how'd you go?
It was all good.
Found my parking spot.
It's in the right place.
I was just so proud of myself for ringing.
And then she goes, oh, wouldn't mind.
I go, well, this is why I don't fucking ring anyone.
Makes no difference.
And so the therapist is like, so, Tony, what's been bothering you?
You're like, you're fucking receptionist, mate.
And he goes, I wouldn't worry about that.
Yeah, I wouldn't worry about that.
She's on the way out.
I've got to get up to say it.
Oh, yep.
And this one I think has snuck up on the team.
Because when I say this, you might need to book another therapy session
because you're about to shit.
Oh.
The date today is the 23rd of August.
Oh, right.
What does that mean?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, some...
Happy birthday to you.
If you are born on the...
If August the 23rd is your birthday,
happy birthday.
What a coincidence.
What a coincidence. It is actually the 23rd is your birthday, happy birthday. What a coincidence. What a coincidence.
It is actually some...
It is a birthday.
It is a birthday.
Do you know whose birthday it is?
I can imagine.
What?
That is at our birthday.
Today is the second birthday of the Tony and Ryan podcast.
Oh, yay.
Two years ago, the first episode got uploaded.
T-Pain and Tinder bios, if I'm not mistaken.
One of the great episodes has been rough since,
but I feel like that first one was good.
Yeah.
Have you seen the T-Pain show yet?
No, I haven't.
You've had two years.
I'm busy, mate.
Ball's in the air.
I'm at therapy.
I've got things to do.
So imagine if you get into therapy and he's like,
oh, Tony, I've got something for you to think about.
Have you seen T-Pain's documentary?
And you go, fucking no.
Yeah.
Have you watched This Is Pop?
There's a part of me that thinks Tony and Ryan started two weeks ago.
And there's another part of me that thinks that I've been doing this for as long as I
can remember.
Yeah.
It is weird.
I thought about an old job the other day and i was like oh because
yeah i left there six years ago and then i was like well no uh that wasn't it was last year yeah
so two years today how weird yeah like i said i don't know if it feels quick or long or whatever
but um what do they say about kids they say like the days are long but the years are quick
do they say that yeah like the the days like that is true because days with a kid are long but the years are quick. Do they say that? Yeah, like the days are.
That is true because days with a kid are long.
Yeah, but then like all of a sudden it's been like years have passed
and you go, oh, my God, they're at school or whatever.
I wish that was the case because they can just get to school.
Yeah.
Would our podcast be walking yet for a baby?
Yeah.
Yeah.
How old when they walk?
One and a bit.
Should I know?
No, I don't think so. I think one and a bit. I wouldn't worry about it. I wouldn't when they walk? One and a bit. Should I know? No, I don't think so.
I think one and a bit.
I wouldn't worry about it.
I wouldn't worry about it.
One and a bit.
Oh, okay.
We're walking, mate.
Look at our little podcast.
We're toddlers.
We need to put up a little danger things around the benches.
Yeah, we need to get those soft things for our heads.
Cover the fireplace.
Oh, and put that thing on the toilet.
You know how they put those like... Do I need to...
Considering Mabel will be walking next winter, do I...
I thought you were about to say next week.
I was like, well, she's not one in a bit.
Yeah, she can come right to me.
You've lied to me.
She can come right to me.
Yeah.
Do we need to put something in front of the fire so she doesn't, like, touch it?
Or should we be more concerned about how fucking good our fire looks without a screen around it?
I mean, she's only going to do it once.
You only got to touch a fire once in order not to touch that again.
It's a good looking fire.
Where I grew up in the hills in Rolling Stone, which is very much like where you live in Eltham.
We grew up with a wood fire because it's so fucking cold.
Like you can't not have one.
And we never had a screen around our fire.
It was like, you'll only touch that. Like that's you and you just learn and now you're in therapy
i never touched it better get that screen
yeah look at you yeah we might get one
look how you turned out no wonder you've spent your whole life stressed you didn't have a screen
around your fire.
Walking around your lounge room not knowing if today's going to be the day that you fall in and die.
I'll get her a screen.
I love that girl.
I fucking love Mabel so much. Yeah, she's a little sweetheart.
What do you love to see besides my daughter?
Olivia Buchanan shared this on our Patreon.
It's very, very sweet.
She says, I love you guys,
and I'll finally have your love to see it worthy of a shout out.
Great.
First of all, we'll be the judge of that.
On Saturday, I graduated with my PhD.
Huge.
What did he study?
And she says in brackets, I'm not that smart.
I just didn't want to leave and get a job.
Yeah, nah, nah.
Which is a great reason to get your PhD.
And she says, and today my granddad turned 100.
What a coincidence.
Not on the same day.
Okay, sorry.
He got a letter from the King and the Prime Minister of New Zealand,
and he'd be stoked for a birthday shout-out.
Happy birthday, granddad.
Happy birthday, granddad.
100.
Do we know what her PhD's in?
100. Nah, I don't know.
But 100.
We just turned two.
So that is coincidence, Chad.
Oh, we've got the same birthday.
I met someone who maybe thought they knew my brother,
whose grandad was 100 and we were two.
Coincidence, Chad.
I've got a question.
Love to see that question.
When I finish my MBA
and that's
NBA,
should I then do a PhD and be a
doctor?
For no other reason. Than to be able
to say you're a doctor. I've thought about it.
And to say I have a PhD because I
wasn't born with the gifts to be able to say
that without the degree. I also would just
love to be able to on a plane and they go is also would just love to be able to, on a plane,
they go, is there a doctor on board?
And I go, yes.
This man is dying.
I've got my doctorate in business.
That happened to my lecturer.
Oh, I've heard stories.
When I was at Lindenwood, the guy who was an economics professor,
he was a lovely guy.
He did his PhD in the economics of the car industry in
Detroit in the 90s or something like specific
economic theory and policy.
And he's seen your first date.
And then someone, they're like,
they run down the sheet and they just go, oh, there's a
doctor in 32B. And you go, well,
obviously he's not a medical doctor because he'd be sitting in 1A.
But in 32B, they're like, oh, can you help me?
He goes, oh, I've just got a PhD in economics.
Like, it's not time for your credentials, sir.
Oh, yeah.
Just joking.
Now's not the time to be modest.
You can do it.
But that could be me.
Yeah.
And I will study for four years and write a 100,000-word dissertation.
Yeah, I would do it too, just for the gag.
Just for the gag.
Should we get someone to Google that and find out how long that would take us
and we could do it?
The fastest you could do is three years, but it's probably four.
I got offered to do a PhD when I finished my honours in undergrad.
Oh, really?
But like, was it Olivia?
Yeah.
It's like it gets to the point where you're like,
this isn't like bettering your job prospects.
You're just like delaying the real world.
Yeah.
So a graduate in the master's average income is like $150,000
and an average with a PhD is like $90,000.
Oh.
Yeah.
Why?
Because of that, you're just like entering academics instead of.
Yeah.
So you don't have any like the hands-on stuff or whatever,
depending on what your PhD is in.
Anyway, Liv, congrats on your PhD.
If that doesn't make it in, I wouldn't.
Dr. Liv.
Dr. Buchanan, paging Dr. Buchanan.
That sounds cool.
You love to say that.
Yeah, Dr. Tony Lodge.
Well, you say that anyway.
Dr. Ryan Dunn.
DRRD.
Dude.
Hey, dude.
Tomorrow on the show Yep
My grandma's got some advice for everyone in a relationship
Oh, that's sweet
So if you're in a relationship
You've been in a long-term relationship
New relationship
Maybe you're about to get married
My grandma has some words of wisdom
So get a pen and paper and get ready to take some notes
Wholesome
Wholesome shit
Alright, that's tomorrow on the show
Chat to you then
Love you, bye.