Too Scary; Didn't Watch - ALIEN with Rex Ogle

Episode Date: December 4, 2019

Ellen Ripley, space truck-drivers, and a cute baby alien that becomes an extremely not cute adult alien almost instantly - we're talking Ridley Scott's Alien. Rex Ogle (author of Free Lunch) joins us to talk about this classic sci-fi horror film. Sigourney Weaver is a badass bitch and this movie has the best trailer and tagline maybe ever? In space no one can hear you scream. Ahhhhhh! Warning: Includes spoilers for Prometheus, Aliens, and somehow... The Hobbit. Follow the show: @TSDWpodcast on Twitter, TikTok, and Instagram. Check out our Patreon for bonus episodes and additional content! Rate Too Scary; Didn’t Watch 5 Stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts and leave a review for Emily, Henley, and Sammy. Advertise on Too Scary; Didn't Watch via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is Emily, Henley, and Sammy, and you're listening to Too Scary, Didn't Watch. Hi, everybody. Welcome to Too Scary, Didn't Watch, the horror movie recap podcast for those too scared to watch for themselves. I'm Emily and maybe I'm not too scared anymore. Yeah. Change for the week. Yeah. I'm Henley and I'm still very scared. Okay. Okay. I'm Sammy and I'm usually brave, but subbing for scared today. Subbing for scared. Subbing in for scared. Did anything scary happen to us this week? I guess one scary thing was that we went to the magic castle. Yeah. And there was a magician there who was like, looked like he was like 17 years old.

And I realized that I feel like an old person. Oh, yeah. Well, I was going to say my scary thing is that I was attracted to him. Yeah. I was attracted to a 23-year-old magician. Yeah, he was 23. Which is scary. But, you know, I, Henley, was hit with this. I really wanted to show him the world.

Yes, the worldly woman. Yes, and I've not yet had that desire. And I was like, oh, this is, look at this for me. This is fun. And is this too much to say desire. And I was like, oh, this is look at this for me. This is fun. And is this too much to say in a podcast that all of our parents listen to? I just I said it and it really did scare me. It scared me, but I think

new facets of my personality. Also, I think my parents and my fiance's parents have stopped listening. So don't worry about those. I was worried about your parents and Tim's parents hearing that for me. Thank God. Guys, I had a very scary thing happen.

Oh, my God. What happened? I got like incredibly high on Friday, like medically dangerous. Like I was like, should I call 9-1-1? I don't smoke pot. I don't I don't usually get high so my mother actually gave me edibles that her previous tenant had left behind she's gonna be so mad when she hears this because she feels really bad but I like didn't know how much was normal to eat yeah and in my research after the, found out that like a good starting dose would be like five milligrams.

Oh, God. How much? I ate 25 milligrams. Whoa, Sammy. And I was truly like on a different planet. It was wild. I have never been so high. And I like kept kind of like forgetting what life was. And I just had to like remind myself like you just ate way too much weed edibles. You're not dying. And I like was able to Google, can you die from weed? And you can't. So and I did it.

Oh, my God. Twenty five milligrams. Realizing that you are way too high. I also don't smoke very much, but I've had a couple times where I'm like, oh no. It was so bad. And it happened in one instant. I was like watching a YouTube video. Oh no. And then all of a sudden I was like, oh no.

That is exactly what my body does. Oh no. Things have changed for me. And I was actually trying to watch Love Island at one point and it got to a point where I couldn't understand anything that anybody was saying. i stopped being able to like understand humans were you by yourself yeah thank god i think if i had been with anyone they would have like called 9-1-1 the first time i ever got high i got similarly was like not happening it's not

happening it's not happening and then like as court you get really high. Also, this was like three years ago. And I got so scared and I started crying because I really thought it was it for me. Yeah. I mean, it was really quite scary, but I was really trying to just meditate through it. I was like, it's going to be okay. It's going to be okay. And it was, it just felt, it was so weird. It was so crazy. It was really scary. Yeah. That really is really scary that really is scary that really is scary wow well I'm glad you well so that's a good segue into you get a break this week you're not our scary

movie watcher yes I am you guys it's me I'm so brave I did volunteer to do this week's because it felt like a not super scary one in terms of what we normally do um i still thought it was scary and very very good this week's movie is

alien um came out in 1979 directed by radley scott written by dan o'bannon which is a funny name that's a fun name um it's a fun name it is starring sigourney weaver tom scarrett veronica cartwright yafit kodo harry dean stanton and ian holm um i'm so nervous to be in charge of this i really i'm feeling myself like am i doing what sammy does am i doing it right you're doing great thank you so much this is normally what Sammy does. She says who's in it. It's very good. What happens now? Oh, well.

We introduce our guest. Yes. Today, we are very lucky to be blessed with the presence of Rex Ogle. Hi. Woo! So happy for you to be here. He is author of free lunch which just came out um everyone go take a look it's currently one of the top 100 books on amazon so thank you amazing hi rex hi um did anything scary happen to you this week uh i thought about my taxes oh no but you know

i think you win that's what you went through and it is a competition you definitely win which i would hate to win this competition yeah it's not a good one it's not a good one i definitely had an extra scary week but taxes are also very scary right around the corner right around the corner can you even believe it do you have an accountant that you work with yeah uh i had someone in new york who I've worked with for like 10 years, maybe 12 years. I can't do it. Math is awful to me. It's tough. And government math makes me cry. Oh, yeah.

It's like they try to make it too hard. Oh, they definitely do. That's on purpose. They're trying to trick you. That's on purpose. Yeah. So they can squeeze more money out of you. We're libertarians on this podcast. Well, I would love to get a reference for your accountant because I'm looking for

one. Listeners, write in. Particularly if you're LA local, we would love to know who you use. I need help as a freelancer. Mine are very hard. Yes, I'm in the entertainment sphere. Independent contractor. Help

me out. So Rex, do you like scary movies generally? Love. So I should preface this by I was born in Abilene, Texas, but my dad was in the military. So we moved to Okinawa and Guam when I was a little kid. And I guess we never we never had a TV and there was no movie theater. So we came back to the States when I was four and a half or five. And my uncle's like, you've never seen a movie.

I'll take you to a movie. And he took me to see Night of the Living Dead. Oh, no. Four and a half? My first theatrical media experience was of the black and white original version with zombies. Wow. It's very scary, right? It's terrifying.

I've never seen it. I've never seen it either. So zombies are like kryptonite to me, but anything else, bring it on. I'm not scared of anything. Do you have like a favorite genre of horror movie, like psychological thriller, gore? I'm not a fan of gore. Like I don't like. Nobody is. I don't like torture porn. I'm waiting for the person who says they like torture porn. I'm not a fan of gore. Like, I don't like... Nobody is.

I don't like torture porn. I'm waiting for the person who says they like torture porn. I really like... I don't know if it's like art house porn. Like, something between It Follows, which is just so well done, and Cabin in the Woods because it makes me laugh and is also so well done. Yeah. But I do love all things.

And the reason I chose Alien is because it's not a typical scary movie, but it is. It's a horror movie. It is. And the mood is so scary. Like we were talking about just the idea of being in space is scary on its own. Space is really scary. Space is terrifying. Yeah. That's enough. What's the scariest movie you've

ever seen? Is it Night of the Living Dead? Nothing can top that experience. Yeah, man. at four and a half that was really tough so when Walking Dead and stuff came out were you like hell no hell no isn't that so interesting how much that can imprint on you like you're like you watch any other scary movie but there's something

about you're like I'm done nope can't do that I'm scarred emotionally scarred my mom forbid me to watch the Nightmare on Elm Street and the Friday the 13th movie so of course I went out and snuck into them when I was like 10 years old. And I was like, really? This is it? This is no Night of the Living Dead, my friends.

Hello, everybody. It is time for Cocktail Hour. This week's cocktail is an alien secretion. Nasty name, but hopefully a pretty tasty drink. To make an alien secretion, you combine two ounces of vodka, a half an ounce of melon liqueur, a half an ounce of coconut rum liqueur, and three ounces of pineapple juice. Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into an ice-filled collins glass you will garnish with a pineapple wedge and a luxardo maraschino cherry yum yum yum but also you you enjoy we should do trivia let's do some trivia um i just saw one that made me laugh and it's that

uh shredded condoms were used to create tendons of the beast's ferocious jaws that makes sense i remember that um well the um designer of the alien hr geiger is that his name um i was looking at some other of his art and a lot of it is very phallic and very sexual um which we'll get. There's some stuff. So that sort of feels like he'd be like, yeah, that's my vibe. I have tons of condoms lying around.

You want condoms for the tenants at bottom? Let's shred them up. If I'm not mistaken, I think he had a wife, like he fell in love with a woman and she was his everything and then she died. Oh my. So then all his art like went from being like super flowery daisies

to being very sexual, skeletal dead women. Oh that's fascinating. Whoa. That's an upsetting reason. The Edgar Allan Poe of French art in the 80s. Wow. 70s. Cool. It's cool to be the Edgar Allan Poe of something art in the 80s 70s cool yeah it's cool to be

the Edgar Allan Poe of something this is true this may not be true we don't fact check this is what I remember because in high school my girlfriend was obsessed with Alien obsessed that counts as a fact on this podcast so you're in the clear

we all really jumped in to be like we don't care about facts no you're in the right place all really jumped in to be like we don't care about facts no you're in the right place we don't care I have another one the dead face hugger that ash autopsies was made using fresh shellfish four oysters and a sheep kidney to recreate the internal organs

oh my god it does look nasty it looks like a real fucking nasty organism that they're cutting up. That makes perfect. That's honestly really cool. It probably smelled terrible. It probably did. Ew, yeah, I bet it smelled so bad. Ew. Oh, gross.

I hate it. I hate it now. I've seen interviews with the cast and they used actually, they went down to like the meat butcher shop to get the blood. Oh my god. They said that the whole room just stank when they walked in. And the actors didn't know what to expect in that scene. So they walked in and then Veronica Cartwright ends up getting covered in blood. And she was like, what?

And so her screams were real. Actors rights. Actors rights. I don't agree with them doing that. But they got a great performance out of her. And it does look fucking great. But I don't know if that's worth it. I don't stand by that. Emily, were you scared watching this movie?

Yes, I really was. Also, this isn't a trivia, but I'm going to say it. Squirty is really hot in this movie. Oh, she's so hot. She is so hot. And I just looked up. She was 30 when they made it. I thought she looked super, super young. She looks so I don't know, childlike. Yeah, it's like little freckly and she looks so, so hot. And I just looked up, she was 30 when they made it. I thought she looked super, super young. She looks so, I don't know, childlike. Yeah, it's like a little freckly and she looks so, so young.

She's very hot. I was scared. But I was pleased. I will say there aren't really jump scares. A thing that I like a lot about this movie and that made it easier for me to watch is they're not trying to surprise you with what's coming. You know what's coming. And that is very scary.

Like you see it before it happens and you're like, oh, no. And it's great because you're not like I don't like feeling like something's going to come out and get me, but just like watching it. You can't look away. And in typical horror form, you see people about to do something they should not do. And you're thinking, what are you doing? Stop. Don't do that.

Don't do that. Do not do that. So're thinking, what are you doing? Stop. Don't do that. Do not do that. Should we watch the trailer now? Huge dummies. Let's watch the trailer. I'm excited. In space, no one can hear you scream. Oh, fuck yeah. Ooh. Oh, fuck, that was cool. Guys, some trivia about me.

That's my favorite trailer of all time. Oh my God. As someone who used to work in the trailer industry. That's a big deal. That was a big deal. I think even at the time, I feel like there weren't trailers like that. That trailer's amazing. Yeah, it's a great trailer.

No dialogue in it. So when you're listening via the podcast, it's not going to have quite the same effect. But the sound is great. Watch it. Watch it. And it feels like the movie. Sorry. It's not going to have quite the same effect, but the sound is great. Watch it. Watch it. And it feels like the movie. It's slow and building and then it's like, everything's coming and it's crazy. In space, no one can hear you scream.

What a great tagline. Oh my God. Space is scary. Space is really scary. Oh my God. Should we? Oh my God. Are we going to do it? Let's do it. oh my god are we gonna do it let's do it i get to tell i am doing this job okay um okay let's just we'll actually quickly start with um just the character names which it did take me i should have just looked it up but i didn't and my notes were like uh i left like blanks to like fill the names because they don't tell it they don't like they

all have one name even in the credits it's and i think it's their last names maybe we don't know their space crew names they don't like i feel like a lot of times the top of a movie they're like uh you know hey rex rex could you grab that for me rex thanks rex and it's like cool that's rex but they don't really do that in this one so i was like i don't know who these people are yeah um but here are their names um ash kane dallas lambert parker brett ripley ripley is sigourney weaver um and the rest just fucking you'll figure it out as we go they're all on a spaceship um and jonesy and jonesy the cat oh that's the cat jonesy the cat if you guys could focus on the cat plotot I would love that

The cat really leads to some stuff Okay good I mean I only assumed as much So how does it start out What's the first thing that happens So it starts out Very much like Star Wars did With a giant spaceship

Floating into the shot and it's gorgeous it's a long shot it's a slow shot some people have said it's a little 2001 space odyssey but i haven't seen that so i don't know if that's true i heard it's slow it sounds right but so it's an opening shot and it just then it goes from the outside of the ship it goes inside the ship and then it's like kind of giving you And all of the shots are big and wide and open. And that's important for my storytelling, even though I'm a rambler. So, big wide shots. You're going down the halls.

There's like empty spaceship. Yes. And so, it's like silent. But then there's like little bird things. Trippy. Yeah. I can't remember what they're called. Anyways.

I don't know. And then finally, you get to this pod room, and it's five pods. Sorry, seven. There are seven people. And the pods open as the lights come on. And you meet your crew as they're coming out of the deep sleep. And what really, really

shocked me, and I'm already realizing I'm going to be bad at this, because the details that fascinate me are probably wrong ones. Guy who we come to know as Kane is the first one to wake up. He was sleeping in that pod with his neck turned. He's going to be sore. Ow, can you imagine?

I was like, what is he doing? Do they have a chiropractor on this? I sure hope so. How many months do we feel like he's been sleeping? I don't know. You notice his neck. Did you notice what he was wearing? Little tiny shorts. It looks like a diaper almost. At first I was like,

are they pooping themselves? It would make sense if it was a diaper. Do you poop in deep sleep? I don't know. Because they shut themselves down. They're essentially putting themselves in comas. In case of an accident. They've been asleep for 10 months or 20 months. A long time.

A long time. A long time. Yeah. That is a long, long time. Oh, and the ship, if it matters, I don't know if it does, is called Nostromo. Nostromo. Nostromo is the name of the ship. Okay.

And so the thing to know about the ship is that what you get in the cast is like, you know, they wake up, they meet in like kind of the wreck, wreck hole? Yeah. The nest hole. Where they're eating. They go to have a meal. And so they're all kind of like, you know, you're getting a vibe for the characters, you know, Ripley and Ash are the science officers. Tom Skerritt, whose name I can't

remember. He's the leader. That's Dallas. Dallas is the leader. Veronica Cartwright, I think she is Lambert. Lambert is the driver. I'm not going to know their names. I'm not going to know their names. I'm not going to remember their names. That's okay. I've got them written.

Which ones? Where are we going next? We got Parker and Brett. Yes. And then those two guys are... Like engineers or... Basically, but at the end of the day, what you need to know is this is a blue collar crew.

Essentially, these are truck drivers. It is their job to go to the other side Of the universe mine ore Or pick up they're not even mining it themselves They're just picking it up and bringing it home they're drivers Yeah we learned that this is a commercial Ship okay Has a year been given to us At all no no we don't know that's a beautiful

Thing we don't know it could happen but we do know That the The route back was supposed to take 10 months And so they've been sleeping like they go there Getting ready to be home yes They're all think they're like getting ready to be home. Yes. They're all excited. They're like, we're going to be at Earth.

We're, you know, we're just entering our solar system. They're like not. It's like very normal. They've already gotten the stuff. Or no. Yes. They have the ore and they're just coming back. They're waking up from their deep sleep.

Okay. They think they're approaching Earth. Damn. So that makes it even like shittier what's about to happen. It does. It's like Event Horizon where they thought that was their last. Damn. So that makes it even like shittier what's about to happen. It does. It's like Event Horizon where they thought that was their last ship. Can you imagine like coming home from a work trip

and being like, I can't wait to sleep in my own bed. So close to home. And then they're like, oh yeah, we're still 10 months away from Earth. So they get a message from Mother, which is also very 2001 Space Odyssey. It's just like the command system on the ship, I guess, who gives them their messages.

Is there Hal? There's Hal. This podcast, this episode means nothing if you haven't seen 2001 Space Odyssey. So Dallas, the captain, goes to this beautiful room. Again, the detail I wrote. Beautiful room where he talks to Mother, gets a message, and

yeah, so we learn then they were supposed to be about home. They get a transmission from someone. It could be an SOS. They're not sure. And they have to go figure out what it is, which will take them off course and they are not going home. Yeah. Got it.

So are they close to home right now? No. They got like woken up mid-journey home. Exactly. That's what I think it was was it was supposed to be a 20 month journey home and they only made it halfway so they're still 10 months away from earth in their minds we're not getting woken up until we're home

right but they got this reroute so they're like oh well fuck yes and a guy there's like a debate about whether or not they have to respond and one guy's like no we're going home we're done yeah and they learn that contractually if they receive any transmission from any other life, they have to go address it. That's why they have science officers on the ship, I guess.

Yeah. And they're really pissed. I mean, again, these are blue collar workers. They thought they were going to be home. Yeah. And the upsetting thing is that, you know, not only if they don't go, they lose all their money. So all of this has been wasted.

So they have to go they're really trapped they're really trapped and mother is like the communication system but they work for the company the company and that comes up later so yeah that's what i'm doing air quotes the company company they went to the company also i thought another thing i wrote a dude is smoking on the spaceship. That could be good. He's smoking. He's smoking a cigarette. He's smoking hot. You're like, that should not be allowed in space.

Dallas is kind of hot. Yeah, I think Dallas is hot. Dallas and Ripley. Oh, yeah. Ripley, of course. Yeah, and we also see there's a cat there, too. Jonesy. A little orange cat. I'm nervous for the cat. So I used to love back-to-school shopping so much that I would tell my mom that I wanted to work at Staples when I grew up.

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ship i think is like the size of manhattan and they detach like a little pod yes yeah a mini ship if you will a mini ship and they go down to the surface. And it is lots of clouds and lots of it's very jarring. Lots of shaky camera. Yeah. And as they're landing on this planet, something goes wrong. They got a whole breach. They had a whole

breach. They had to like put out a fire and electricity in it and they can't they won't be able to leave for 25 hours to get back to the big ship from the mini ship't be able to leave for 25 hours yeah um to get back to the big ship from the mini ship a lot can happen in 25 hours it's a long time yeah and so parker and brett who are mechanics or whatever something or the mechanics for the ship um they go to like check it out ripley goes down to see what's up yeah They're very rude to her. Guys, people are rude to her this whole movie.

They hate her. Well, I do want to point out that the characters in the movie are not feminist, but I think when the script was written, they didn't have male or female roles in mind at all. So if they were women, they still would have been rude to her? Like cast as women?

I'm guessing. That said, it was kind of a feminist movie to basically Have two women on a seven Person crew and Ripley's a fucking Badass yeah total badass we don't know That yet we don't know that yet why are they Mean to her we don't really know that Yet either but it's

She's the science officer she's like sort of the odd man Out it seems she's a science officer and then there is another science officer, Ash, and he is also a dick to her. We don't totally see that because I was going to say maybe they're rude to her because they're like you think you're smarter than us. But I think he's part of that because again, blue collar workers. She's smarter than them. She's

third in command. She's third in command. So she's above the other science officer. So it's Dallas, Ash, Ripley. So Ripley is third in command. Dallas, Kane, Ripley, I thought. Oh, maybe you're right. But she's third in command. Yes. But nobody really likes her. They're very rude to her. But they're

stuck on this little planet for a little while. They gotta go figure out what the transmission was. So they send out an exploratory group. Yes, of three people. And... Two of which as I watched, I left blank because I did not know their names, but I know them now. Okay. It's Lambert, Dallas, and Kane. Yes.

Okay. So these three go out and they're on this weird planet. You know, they're in spacesuits. It's claustrophobic. It's nighttime. There's like clouds. It's foggy. They're talking about the weather's really bad. The cameras are really bad. The camera receptions that's going back to the ship. They have like GoPros essentially. Yeah. Right. And Ash in the ship. They have like GoPros essentially and Ash in the

ship is watching them and communicating with them. And he's like, what is that? And they look up and there is a massive spaceship. That looks like two dicks. I was going to say a horseshoe. It's a horseshoe with dicks. It really is.

It's very, very phallic. Insanely phallic. Well, my interest is piqued. Were they not expecting an actual spaceship? I think they were expecting something. I don't know. Yeah, they didn't really know what they were expecting. Part of it is that it doesn't look like a human spaceship.

I was going to say, it's not like any ship they've seen before. Okay, got it, got it, got it, got it. Alien dicks. Two bizarre dicks. They're like, we got to go check out this dick ship. Yeah. In the meantime, Ripley is trying to decode the transmission. Yes.

And work with Mother to figure out what it says. Okay. So they go into the ship and it's very claustrophobic and already the scenes are getting smaller and smaller. They're in small hallways right right it's getting creepier it's darker it's like what's going on and then they kind of enter a

room with and it's it's a big room but it has a pilot but the thing about the pilot is he's pretty much a giant compared to them he's probably like 20 feet tall it's like a control room of sorts but he's dead he's sitting in the captain's chair and as they're examining

him, they're like, he's been dead for probably hundreds of years because he's fossilized. He's fossilized. So, 100 years, 1000 years, we don't know. They also say he looks exploded from the inside of his chest. There's a hole in his chest. And so they're like, it looks like

he exploded from the inside. And they're like, that's weird. That's weird anyway. Keep looking. Yeah, let's keep looking. And do they comment on the fact that he's massive? Is that just a visual thing? I don't remember him being massive, but maybe he is. Maybe in my mind, maybe it was the scales. I don't know.

To me, he appeared really big. My eyes were trying to make, because it's also very dark in there. I was trying to make out, what exactly are we seeing? Maybe I'm being dramatic. Maybe he was 10 feet tall. Still big. Just because I've seen future movies, there are big men in it later, right? Exactly.

Prometheus and stuff. So that would make sense. Those are big men? They're like God men. Yes. Okay. Spoiler alert for Prometheus. A movie we're not God men. Yes. Okay. Spoiler. Spoiler alert for Prometheus. A movie we're not currently doing.

So they send one of the guys down into- This like cave situation. He like repels down. Again, I'm kind of like, why are you doing that? That's a bad idea. And in the meantime, right before that happens, after they find the dead guy, Ripley comes to Ash in the control, watching them. And she's like, hey, I got mother decoded part of the message.

I don't think it's an SOS. I think it's a warning. Oh no. It always is. Again, Event Horizon. Why can't they just decode it before they arrive? I don't know. It's hard in space. They gotta get close enough. Yeah, and so... I don't know. That's actually a good reason. She says to

Ash, we learn, this is where we start to learn that Ripley's a badass. She's like, I think I'm gonna go in after them and let them know that it's a warning. Like, I think I'm gonna go try to find him. And he is such a fucking dick and he goes like, why? By the time you get there, they'll know if it's a warning or not. Like, what will that do? Oh boy.

So he's like very fine with them like getting killed if that happens. He's like, you can't do anything about it. And she's like, okay. Yeah. So, Cain starts rappelling down this cave. Cain rappels down into this cave. them like getting killed if that he's like you can't do anything about it and she's like okay yeah so Kane starts rappelling down this cave Kane rappels down into this cave and now we get a full view of what is a corridor but this corridor

now this is definitely giant this is giant huge massive massive massive it's like the ship the two dick ship is hollow and it's just like massive but it almost looks like a rib cage. Like it's almost like the ship is alive. It's very skeletal.

Very slimy. Yeah. And then he gets to the bottom of it. And again, he's kind of like standing on one of the ribs. So there's like an indention, like a little pit down the side. And there's like a sensor, like lights. And it's like little clouds. Mist.

Yeah. He says it's like the tropics down here. Yeah. And then he slips and falls like you do oh no you do right into the pit which is filled with eggs they come up to like about his thigh probably like all these little eggs yeah like two three feet whatever laid those eggs is not gonna like that no no um it's yeah and he's like but he feels he seems just

like intrigued not scared no he's like wandering around he like walks through start shining a light at the egg at which point we see something moving with inside of the egg it's it's like a little bit translucent you can like it's like a membrane yeah it's like it's like little fish eggs you know how you

can see a little fish move in there yeah yeah little fish eggs got it got it and so they're having they have like an attitude of like oh we're like discovering something instead of like uh-oh yeah yeah they're very much he's like oh whoa i see like he's like very he like calls up like oh look but what you know they're like not scared at all but they again are not explorers so these guys are not explorers. And these guys are not scientists. Right. So I feel like that's not the reaction you would have, right? Like, I feel like you'd just be scared. Yeah.

Like, unless you like signed up to go like find alien life, I'd be pretty scared to see alien life. Yeah. We don't know what year it is. Yeah, that's true. Maybe there has been friendly aliens. Spoiler alert for aliens. They don't really believe her that there was an alien there.

So let's keep spoiling movies that we're not doing. So at this point, we kind of get our first scare in the movie. We get our first scare. Which, not surprisingly, the egg opens at the top. He's like peering down. He sees like, oh, there's some movement. And then it like opens like a cootie catcher like four little petals because it's like a plus sign and then it goes yeah like opens up in the top

um and he even as he sees it open he's like oh cool and like looks over the egg and we see what's in there and it's like this like pulsating it like looks sort of like um like a like an organ like a big organ like a couple oysters and some sheep bladders. Exactly like a sheep bladder. It almost is like a scorpion and it's an arachnid because it has eight legs and a long tail. And the next thing it

does is it jumps on his face and burns straight through his space mask. We always see it jumps out like we know it's going to. This is kind of a jump scare but also like fucking duh. You know it's going to happen.

So he's like peering over and it just lodges like almost like suction cup to his helmet. That's all we see in this moment is it goes just like Oh I thought it

goes through. My bad I skipped ahead. Spoiler ahead for the movie we are doing. We see that happen. What are these things called they have a cool name right well they call these the face huggers face huggers great name cute cute yeah no wonder you remember that what is that really cool name um okay so they do they hear him like screaming

or whatever and they know something has gone awry. Pretty quickly cut. Like it's like, yeah, they like know it's bad. But then we're like, we're done. Back to Ripley. Cut to Dallas and Lambert, the two who do not have the facehugger. OK. Are trying to enter the ship. Yes.

And Ripley is like, what's going on? She's like, are all three of you OK? Where's Kane? Where's Kane? And they're like, he's hurt. Open the doors. And she's like, tell me what's going on she's like are all three of you okay where's Kane where's Kane and they're like he's hurt open the doors and she's like tell me what's going on and everyone's like open the door Ripley and she's like no you just went to an

alien spaceship tell me what's going on I'm not opening the door quarantine protocols yeah and she keeps saying they tell her like he has like he has an organism on him it might kill him and she's like okay even more reason like no no no right and they're like he has like he has an organism On him it might kill him and she's like okay Even more reason like no no no Right and they're like it may kill him and she's like If I let you in the ship it may kill all of us

Right so smart Her and that crazy logic I know because she's and she that's when we learned She's the science officer And quarantine needs to be 24 hours and They all need he needs to stay in quarantine And She there and the guy dallas

who's the captain they're like open the door open the door um but she is in charge yes because when dallas is off the ship and the other person one and two are off the ship she's number three she's in charge and she's like no i'm in charge you're not coming on this ship and then the other science officer ash is like presses the button ash lets them on wow oh boy what a piece of shit he is a piece of shit we are learning pretty quickly so

they just casually he just casually lets in an alien life force into there they take him straight to the infirmary this I think is where we see we see it's burned through the face mask. It has burned through his helmet. Oh, God. They cut his helmet off and it's just completely attached over his.

I'm doing it with my hand. This is a podcast. I can't do that. Completely attached over his full face. Yes. With the tail tentacle wrapped around his throat. Is he dead or still alive? Still alive.

He's alive. And it seems, because they're like, how did he survive out there if it burned through his mask? The thing has little gills and it's breathing for him. It's got little lungs. What? Because outside it's like poisonous. Right.

And he can't talk at all. It's covering his face. We can't see his mouth, his nose, his eyes. It's all over his face. He's not in pain flopping around. No. They try to plier one of the fingeries

off and then the tentacle wraps tighter around his throat. The tail tightens around his neck. So they put him in an MRI machine. They do an x-ray. And they're like, okay, it's got something going down his throat now at this point i would say it's kind of rapey um and i don't mean that in a negative way but it is i mean this alien has jumped onto wait yeah it's jumped onto his face and it's essentially got something down its throat. Oh, that's so gross. It has penetrated his mouth.

It has penetrated him. That, they learn, is how it's giving him oxygen. It went into his throat and is keeping him alive but putting him in a coma. And they're like, why would it be doing that? That makes no sense. Uh-oh. Can't be a good reason. I have an idea.

So they decide to freeze him. Well, first they try to cut. They're like, you know what? We just have to try to cut it off of him. That's right. They use a little laser to cut one of the legs. Oh, that's right. Sorry.

No, it's okay. They use the laser to cut through the legs. Does it work? No. The blood comes out and the blood burns through the floor. Oh, it's acid blood. It's acid blood. It's acid.

Oh, boy. It burns through multiple layers. Because they acid blood. And it burns through multiple layers. Because they're running down because if it breaches the hole, you know, all their oxygen's going to fly out of this hole. So they're like running down. And luckily for them, after three or four levels, it stops. Okay, good.

They managed to... But that's like, okay, so we can't... We literally can't kill this thing. There's nothing they can do. Fuck. Some good defense mechanisms there on that. They could electrocute it maybe? What are some other ways to kill it? Yeah, maybe. They're thinking about it.

They're thinking about it. And then this is when Ripley goes and it's cool because you think, she sort of confronts him but she's pretty badass about it and she goes to him and she's like, hey, so why'd you do that? Why did you what's what it like? What do we know about this organism?

Like, what's the deal? And it's like, and by the way, so I'm third in command in Dallas and came off the ship and you put all of our lives in jeopardy. And he's like, well, I guess I just sorry. Like he's like, I forgot. He's like such a dick. Fuck that guy. Also and he's like well I guess I just sorry like he's like I forgot he's like such a dick fuck that guy also he's Bilbo Baggins spoiler for another movie we're not doing

it's not a spoiler it's just who he plays in the movie casting spoiler god it's gonna be hard for me to love Bilbo Baggins that's all I can think about doesn't Bilbo Baggins get a little bad in the end he is he's got like a little bit of a needle in his eye. Why are you spoiling this?

God damn it. This podcast is full of spoilers. Who could have seen all these spoilers coming? We'll have to do a disclaimer in the beginning. This podcast is filled with spoilers. Okay, so at that point they decide to freeze him. They freeze him. Well, they're going to.

They're going to. They decide to like, hey, let's see what happens if we try to freeze them they freeze them well they're going to i'm going to they're going to decide they're like hey let's see what happens if that can like try to freeze it back in like the pods that they were in in the beginning type thing or just in a freezer in the infirmary so they go they go back to the infirmary yeah to do that um and they're like oh no oh no ash calls them while they're off someone calls them because they're having an argument. Whatever. Whatever. And he's like, y'all should come down and see this. They're like, what's happening?

Just come down. You should come see it. So Dallas Ripley and Ash go into the infirmary and Kane is laying there on the table. The facehugger is gone. It's gone. Oh, no. Oh, no. It's not on him.

It's not on him. Oh, no. And they're in the dark. They're in the dark for some reason. I'm like, turn on the lights. Let's look for them. And I'm like, turn on the lights. But they're in the dark.

But they're in the dark. So they're like, we got to find where the fuck this thing is. They're walking around. They're looking, poking and prodding at little, little poles. Trying to find it. Maybe're like, maybe it's over here in this corner. This benign little creature. And then you see something dangling down

right by Ridley. She starts screaming and flailing and she knocks it down. Yeah, it falls on her. Oh no. It's already dead. It's dead. Yay! Oh, okay. We get a win. We get a win. So she's like scared and freaks out but then they're like, oh, it's dead. Yeah okay we get a win we get a win so she's like scared and freaks out but then they're like oh it's dead yeah um so then they start arguing yes he's like blast this thing into

space like fuck get this thing out of here yeah i like that and ash is like no we have to keep it this is really in life form this is like we have to figure out what this is this is an amazing discovery and it's already dead. Dallas is the captain. So he's in charge. And he goes like, Ash, whatever you, he like, let's ask this side. Why? I don't know.

Because it's a boys club. Yeah. Male hubris. That's why. And neither does Ripley. She then goes after Dallas and is like, I don't trust Ash. Why would you let him do this? And he's like, well, I mean, whatever. I don't know.

He doesn't really have a reason. But he's like, I don't want to think about it. Essentially. He's like, this isn't my well I mean whatever I don't know he doesn't really have a reason but he's like I don't want to think about it essentially he's like this isn't my area of expertise I don't know yeah I just want to go home like fuck this yeah at that point they're just going about whatever they're doing things and then the Parker and Brett the engineers fixed

the their mini ship that's right and they fly back up to the big ship so they go up to the main ship and they're like alright cool we'll go home now they're back with the big ship time to go home and this is where they learn it's gonna take them 10 more months 10 more months yes that's where they learn they were woken up halfway through there oh they're like oh i'm glad you took notes because my memory is not great apparently i watched this last night no it's a lot it's hard it's hard i'm like after this i'm like i'm going to watch it and not take notes because it sort of took

me out of it. But yeah, well, they knew they were interrupted. But I think they're sort of like, great. Now we'll be home. And they're like, no, 10 more months. And they can't be put back into a deep sleep. Can they do that again? They can.

They can. They're upset. Yeah. They decide Cain is not awake. The thing isn't on him and he's alive, but they're like, I guess let's freeze him. They're like, let's just freeze him, maybe.

But he's awake. And he doesn't really remember much and so they're like, they're talking to him. He's fine. They do a systems check. His body is fine. He seems like himself. He seems like himself. He talks about, he's like, I had a dream where I was being smothered and they're like yep

yes but he's like fine yeah and so everyone's like okay well let's get back into cryo sleep like the alien died you're cool like nothing could go wrong and Cain's like I'm just really hungry can we eat before we sleep

and everyone's like, okay. Let's have a meal. Oh, no. They talk about how bad the food. Again, they're like back in the mess hall, eating food. Hanging out and they're talking about how the food is bad. They can't wait to eat the food they're going to eat when they get home. The two guys low on the total

want bigger bonuses for all this nonsense. They still want bonuses. One of them, Parker, sexually harasses lambert it's fun yeah um they're talking about what they're gonna eat and he's like i'll tell you what i would like want to eat or something it's like very it's bad and she's sort of

like oh yeah that's annoying i hate this work environment um but we're having a good time we're having a good time um everyone's laughing everyone's chatting i don't i don't know that it is But we're having a good time. We're having a good time. Everyone's laughing. Everyone's chatting. Well, Henley, I don't know that it is. I don't know that it is, Henley.

Cain is laughing. He's eating. And it gets worse from there. It starts off, he's choking. They're like, oh, Cain, you okay? You're choking? He flips upside down on the table. He starts convulsing. Convulsing.

So he's on his back on the table. Big seizure. Big seizure. Oh, boy. They pin him down. They're trying to pin him down. They're trying to get a fork in his mouth. And he's just flailing around.

And then suddenly blood squirts on his chest. The way they do this is so... And it's gross that it's real blood. But it just... He's wearing a white t-shirt. And you just see red start to spread from his stomach and that's all you see at first it's like a pop and everyone kind of moves back for a second and yeah like as if as if like when you've seen a movie like a gunshot and then just like spills out from there yeah also everyone is gathered

around him and helping him except for ash who is like in the corner watching. Kind of smiling. Yeah. He doesn't look good. What is Ash's deal? We'll find out. But right now he's suspicious. Okay. So everyone is kind of like lean back because of the pop in the blood.

And then they start to lean forward. Oh, no. Pop. The alien pops out of this chest. And honestly, this is the one like sort of funny moment where you realize it's made in 79. He's so cute. He's so cute.

He's so cute. He's really little. He looks like a penis. I was going to say, I feel like he's a little phallic looking also. He like pops up, smiles. He smiles. He has no eyes, but he has a little beautiful smile. Sharp teeth?

Sharp teeth. Silver teeth. Sharp silver teeth. They're sharp silver teeth. But again, kind of cute. And then he zooms away. He just like slides straight out of the room. All I can think about is Spaceballs.

That's exactly what they're parodying. Yeah, when he pops out and then he has like, puts on a little like top hat. He is like cute. And he just like zooms out I was going to say shimmies He kind of like shimmies across the table He's like a little snake shape Snake shape

He's kind of got He's long and penis like and he's got tiny little arms And little legs and a tail Yeah But it happens very quickly He's probably about the size of a two LaCroix cans. He's little. He's like this.

Two LaCroix cans. He zooms out like, you know, those those children's like car toys where you like pull it back and then it goes like, boom. Yeah. That's exactly how he slides. He's like, bye. Which is very funny. And they're like, well, where did he go?

So, okay. is very funny. And they're like, well, where did he go? So, okay. So the life cycle of this alien is born in an egg. A face hugger is born in an egg. Attached to a face. Yes. Lay another egg.

Yes. Die again. And then this one is now the real deal. It needs to be like... Interesting life cycle. Yeah, it is. It's incubated in an egg and then it needs to like do its next phase yeah yeah yeah yeah I think what the indication

is to grow in type thing okay I won't spoil that part I'll hold on a minute yeah I'm interested in what that yeah we'll come so they're like well okay then they wrap Kane up Kane's dead dead dead yes yeah wrap him up and shoot him out into space goodbye Kane

do you think that it was actually Kane who came back to life? It seemed like him. It wasn't the alien kind of. It was definitely Kane. He just didn't know that he was the host of this little guy. At some part, I can't remember. Maybe this is my head

filling in the blanks, but Ash says it's a beautiful creature. He's like, it doesn't need sustenance it attaches it's symbiotic he's like this is part of its life cycle because there's the eggs right there's the face hugger and then it goes down inside of him and what it does is it's actually changing because it's like a little it's like your body is the cocoon yes yeah the thing that we learn later about the xenomorphs i think is they're called in the second movie. I'm just going to spoil the second movie. So what the deal is, is that once the facehugger implants the alien, when it goes down into your stomach and basically it's actually eating some of your DNA and then replicating it and mixing it with its own DNA.

Oh, that's fascinating. So all of the aliens. So if a tree hugger attached to a different alien, like a predator alien. It would become a different. It would become a different. It would become a different. It would look different. Like a slightly different version. Honestly, that's cool. Very cool.

So Ash is on to something here with this level of admiration, maybe. Yeah. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Yeah.

They've got weapons now. They have little electric things and a flashlight. Like a little cattle prod type thing. Now they're worried. Yeah. Well, now they're definitely worried. They're worried. Well, yeah. No, they can sort of calm down.

But because they know they're like, we can't, we can't stab it. It's got acid. So they're like, we'll, we'll cattle prod it. We'll like electrocute it and then shoot it into space when we find it. So they split into two teams of three. They each have electric prods, flashlights, and then a little box that detects movement. Yes. A little tracker that Ash made that detects movement, but only at close range.

So they like will have to be near it to find it. Uh oh. And the two groups are Ash, Dallas, Lambert, Ripley, Brett and Parker. Brett and Parker are the like mechanics. Yeah. So they're exploring the ship. Tight, close, dark shots. Get scary.

It's like a horror movie where you're climbing underneath the house or trying to escape from something, but you're kind of hunting something that might be hunting you. The tracker makes an interesting little noise thing. And all the lights are off, of course. All the lights are off. I think keep the lights on. I feel like they say something about the lights

went out. Yeah. Sure, sure, sure. They're not out on purpose. It happens. Yeah, some of the systems are going out. Things are like, yeah, a little wonky. Okay. So they're exploring and, you know, they enter a room. The shots are beautiful because Ridley Scott's amazing. It's so beautiful.

They like enter a room with like water dripping down and there's chains and it's really gorgeous. But it's also like, why is there water and chains? Yeah, where are we going? What's happening? What is this? It's like a coolant system. I don't know. The fridge.

It's the fridge. Sure, why not? The chainy fridge. And then one of the guys finds what looks like a condom. This, I feel like, might be the shredded.

Is this the shredded condom? No. Oh, it must be, but wait, this isn't quite yet. Oh. We get a fun cat moment. Oh. I only want to know

about the cat moments. Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't skip any cat moments. Don't skip those cat moments. Don't think they corner it. So is they see they sense movement on the tracker yeah and they're like okay okay and they like lean in shine a light it's the cat he pisses runs away and they're like oh jonesy and then brett yeah they're like brett go find him because we don't want the cat to set off the tracker again. We need to put the cat away.

This is Ripley because again, using the logic. She's very smart. God, she's smart. Although maybe it wasn't great to bring a cat on a ship. Yeah, what is the purpose of the cat being there? I mean, I guess companionship. They're there for a while. Yeah, okay. I mean, the point of cats generally.

Yeah. The same as on Earth. The same as on Earth. Cats in space are the same as on Earth. Got it. So Brett goes into this watery chain room to look for the cat, finds... The condom. The condom. It looks like a condom.

It's like... When a snake sheds its skin. It's a husk. It's already growing. It's already growing. So it has shed its skin. Oh, no. So this is bad because it's

growing and we don't know what it looks like anymore. We don't. We have no idea what it could be. I'm imagining a pretty scary thing. And you would be right. But he's still going after the cat. He's like meowing to get the cat's attention. The cat's meowing

back. It's good cat stuff. So we're on track with the cat. And then he encounters the alien. And this is one of the things that I love about how I said it was not a jump scare. So you like know something's gonna happen. He's alone. He's going after a little cat. But he like leans down and he sees the cat.

The cat's really there. And the cat like slowly creeps out and is like come here Jonesy come here. And then the cat hisses. yep and the cat like slowly creeps out and is like okay he's like come here Jonesy come here and then the cat hisses we see and backs away oh no smart cat but we see we're on a shot now on Brett's face and we see a shadow

coming behind him and then we see its head and it's and we so we're like we know where it's not trying to be like the aliens here it's like look yeah here it comes slowly and scarily so it's not trying to be like the aliens here it's like look here it comes and it's scary so it's kind of like a human body it's black

skeletal very skeletal very bony claws not cute and the head is like massive and it's very long long and like boomerang yeah it's like a. Long and boomerang-y shape.

It's like a banana. If my head was a banana but with the arc kind of upside down. And covered in slime. And black. And huge teeth. And many, many teeth. Many, many, many, many teeth.

Is it the teeth that were made out of condoms? What was made out of condoms? The husk. Because I guess it wask. The husk. The husk. Because I guess it was growing into it. Oh, right. I think it grew fast. Really fast.

Really fast. I mean, it's been no time at all. Yeah. I guess maybe a day. Probably not even. So he looks at the black alien face to face. Yeah, he turns around. His mouth opens.

The alien's mouth opens. And another mouth comes out of that mouth with more teeth and goes. Oh, no. And then that's the last we see of him. Gets him. And later they're like, is he definitely dead? And Rip is like, yeah. Yeah, he's dead.

So no face hugger now. No face hugger. This is just dead. So do you think, so he ate him, probably. It killed him. It killed him. I don't know that it ate him. It just killed him.

It's just killing to protect itself at this point. Hard to say. It would have made more sense if the little thing had killed him and then eaten him. Right. And then got big. Then sized up. But it didn't. It didn't.

It sized up on its own. I don't know. The sizing up is curious. I think we're just meant to understand that these are not friendly creatures. Yes. Right. I think I got that now. They like violence. They want to kill

you. That's their deal. They use your body to make their own body and then they will kill you. I feel like this is still like the scariest looking alien like to this day. It is. Like when I imagine a scary alien, it's this one. It's a man in this suit. Yeah. Like so it's

real. It is practical. It's not CGI because it's fucking 79 and it looks so good and so scary we've really lost something I think by the way just as a side note because we can't no one does practical effects anymore the trailer for alien covenant like made me mad

because it like the aliens looked so they're animated they're just straight up animated like you had a good thing going in 79. You had a good thing going in 79. Yeah. One more trivia. The slime used on the alien was KY Jelly. This movie is very sexual.

Sexual movie! Alright. My goodness. So they huddle back up. Team 1 and Team 2. Team 1 now down. Down to 5. They're down to 5 total. They discover, they think the alien's traveling through the air shaft? They do.

So the alien's in the air shaft. Which is very difficult to get in. Good band name. Aliens in the air shaft. Aliens in the air shaft. That is a good band name. We're going to put that on our merch. Is it just Dallas that goes into the air shaft or do they all

go? What a good thing. We're going to put that on our merch. Is it just Dallas that goes into the air shaft or do they all go? What a good question. Because I remember the ones that go. I think it is just Dallas. That's the door sound. In the air shaft. It is just Dallas. Yes.

So, okay. So, so they decide they're like, we're going to try to burn it. They're like, every organism is scared of fire, right? Like nobody wants to be in a fire. They want to, it's in the air shaft. So like, let organism is scared of fire, right? Nobody wants to be under fire. It's in the air shaft, so let's try to force it into a zone. And burn it. Using fire.

They're trying to force it into where they can expel it into space. They're going to blow them out into the airlock. Yeah, so Dallas goes into the air duct. Dallas goes in there. He's got a flamethrower. The others are in the room monitoring the motions.

They have their tracker, yeah. Okay. And it like monitoring the motions. They have like their tracker. Yeah. Okay. And it doesn't take long. It doesn't take long. I mean he's in a tight space. At this point once Brett honestly once the alien pops out of his stomach we're sort of like and here we go. Yep. And so Dallas is going through the air shafts and he gets cornered by the alien

and fire doesn't really work. No. It's not scared of his fire. At all. And it's really cool because we're like watching. It looks like a video game, but like old time, like radar. Right. So they see a dot that's Dallas and they're like, oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, no. And they're like, they don't see it, but they're like, oh, so now he's dead. He's dead. Okay. And I was surprised he was the next one to go, to be completely honest. Yeah. He's the captain, right. He's dead. And I was surprised he was the next one to go, to be completely honest. Yeah. He's the captain, right? He's the captain.

And he seems like the only person who's kind of Ripley's friend. Like, kind of. He's not a total dick to her. Yep. But nope. Goodbye. He's dead. So is this the point where Ripley goes into the communications room to talk to Mother?

She goes to talk to Mother. Again, this room, beautiful. Yeah. We will show. It's like Christmas lights. It's really pretty. It's like warm. It's only, you know, the whole pretty it's like warm it's only you know

the whole spaceship is very like cold cool tones like white black this room is like a warm golden light like twinkly it's beautiful and she goes in there she's hitting her old keyboard clack clack clack clack loud clacking not quiet clacking yeah big loud typing and she's talking to mother and mother basically gives her a message and it's not a happy message. It's not. Basically, the company kind of planned all this. The company. The company. What?

So imagine you were working for like a truck service, like taking stuff from the warehouse to the Walmart, back to the warehouse, back to Walmart. And then you have to stop to pick up a hitchhiker and the hitchhiker kills you. But the company who owns the truck knew this was going to happen. They wanted the hitchhiker. Why did they want this? Experimenting from afar? They have some other motives beyond

what they knew. Military. So the message essentially is the crew is expendable. The chief motive of this mission is to bring back alien life. Yeah. So you need to keep this alien alive. The primary goal is bring home

the alien life. Crew is expendable. And when Ridley sees that... Ripley. Ripley. Ripley. Ridley Scott. Ripley. Yeah. What's a name that's not my name? Ripley. That's the character. She flips out. Of course. And rightfully so. And she comes in

and there's four people left. One of them is Ash who seems to have been in the know. Yeah, so she goes up to Ash and she's like, what the fuck? Ash knew. Ash knew. Okay, so his motives are becoming clear. Ash wants a promotion and will do anything for it.

And then he starts beating her up. He grabs her by the hair and rips out a chunk. Holy shit. He tries to choke her with a magazine. He shoves a magazine. It's really aggressive. It was very violent.

He basically wads up a magazine and he's trying to shove it into her mouth. Oh my god. I assumed he was going to put an alien or something in his mouth but he was like no just shoving. Also is it right before he beats her up that we see like a drip of white down his face? There's a drip of white

down his forehead and you're like is that milk? They don't address it. Yeah they're like okay. Then he starts beating her up. Does the magazine thing. Yes. And then the other two crew members run in. They see it happening. Yes. Lambert and Parker. Parker. And they start beating him up members run in. They see it happening. Yes. Lambert and Parker. Parker. And they start beating him up. And Parker. Is it Parker? Parker.

Is like fighting him. And then Ash gets the upper hand on him. And then Lambert takes a metal pipe to him. Hits him as hard as she can. And his head comes off. His head? Except but not completely because he's a robot. I've heard. Oh. He's a robot. He's heard. He's a robot.

He's an AI. AI. It's like the Michael Fassbender. Yeah. So he's like this one. So he's. Spoiler for Prometheus. It's not like a robot like with cogs and wires and stuff.

It's like organic and like fruit, like fleshy. And white. And it bleeds like milky. So his head is like off but he's still alive because he's a robot. So it's like his head is just like detached. Yeah. But they didn't know. They've incapacitated him. Decapacitated.

Decapitated slash incapacitated. Both of them. So. That must be shocking for everyone. They were shocked. Interesting. They were shocked and interesting. So now I would like to point out again for 1979. This is very forward thinking. This is very modern.

But the last three people alive right now are two women and a black guy. This is diversity in 1979, which I don't think you got in a lot of horror movies. Especially in horror movies. I feel like the trope is like the women die. Yes guy dies right instead we're like not we're not doing that yeah yeah um well not yet um oh god here we go next they're like we need to figure out what's going on so they wire up uh ash or what's left of them they basically kind of like bring his mind back a little bit like they hook him up to little electrodes wedge his little head to the ground and like stick it down it's nasty it's pretty gross uh and they

and they start talking to him and they're like we want answers and he was like it's a beautiful creature yeah this is where he gives a speech yes this is where you're right this is okay this is where he gives a speech he's a it's a's a beautiful creature. And they're like, the alien? And imagine Bilbo. He's like, it grows so fast. It doesn't need any sustenance. It basically impregnates and expands and lays eggs. So they knew all along

not just that there was alien life. They knew this was what they were after. Oh my gosh. So they just sent them in to be really horrifically murdered. It just occurred to me, Prometheus is a prequel. Yes. So this is how the company knew. This was not the first

ship. Wow. This is the second ship because that's what the Warren was. Charlize Theron was the first company gal. She's so awesome. A lot of cool women in this franchise. uh but yeah so they are like oh okay the whole mission was this we've all died because of you right um

so they decide to blow up the ship they're gonna blow up the ship they're gonna go out of one of those mini mini ships yep they have one of the mini ships and they're like we're just gonna take take because up to this point they couldn't do it because it only took three. So they didn't want to leave anyone behind. But they're like, we can do it now. That's why they were gonna like go through the air shafts because there were five alive still.

And now that they're down to three, they're like, fuck it. That's all we need. The ship can carry three people in the ice beds. Ice beds. The freeze beds. Are they like doing this because they're like, if this alien gets to Earth, things are going to be really bad. Yes. And they're like, we don't know how to destroy it.

We don't like, we're not bringing it back. It's our call now. Yeah. We're just going to blow up. We're going to leave it. Rather than get it off the ship, we're going to get off the ship. We're going to blow it up. We're just going to blow it up.

Yes. Smart. So they're on their way to, because they have to prep the shuttle. Mm-hmm. And then they also have to set off the detonation. Yes. Because they're like, this is very kind of them. They could have just left.

The three of them could have left, survived. Yeah. But they're like, we have to kill this thing. We're just going to blow up the whole ship. And it's essentially like a 10 times, 100 times nuclear bomb. Right. If they blow this up because of all the mineral ore

so Ripley goes to the shuttle and the other two go to set off Ripley goes to look for Jonesy because Ripley wants to bring Jonesy back with her because she's wonderful oh my god also

really should not be her priority. No. But I respect it. Yeah. So she goes off, she finds the cat, puts it in a box, and she's carrying the box in one hand,

which is a very large box and it's very unmanageable. In the other hand, she's got her flamethrower. Yeah. To bring Jonesy to the little pod. Yes. And Parker and Lambert are gathering coolant.

Yes, they're gathering coolant. For the shuttle somehow. Yes. So they and Lambert are gathering coolant. They're grabbing, yes, they're gathering coolant. For the shuttle somehow. Yes. They need it, I don't know. While they're gathering coolant, the alien shows up. Oh no. Oh no. And we go very quickly from three to one. Yeah. It's just like literally the alien shows up and kills them both and you're like, oh, okay.

So unfortunately Ripley hears her friends die. She hears it. And she's crying she's crying oh no for like she allows herself like 10 seconds maybe and then she's like pull it together yep this is all you gotta go so she drops off the cat at the ship yep and then goes to set the detonation devices which is like old school like turning the keys it was a very complicated process. I was thinking like one button. I mean, I guess you have to blow up a whole big ship. Yeah. So there's like four rods and then there's keys and then there's all

these things. Yeah, I guess you don't want to accidentally do that. You don't want to accidentally hit the blow up thing or the ship button. Yeah. Like, damn it. And so she gets it started. She's got five minutes? Something like that. It's like counting down. Yes. The lights are all minutes? Something like that. It's like counting down. Yes.

The lights are all flashing in this crazy way. It looks so cool. Oh, she's got 10 minutes. And she's running back to the ship. She goes into the room with Mother. Right. Has a great line. What's the line? She goes, you bitch, to Mother.

Yes. And destroys Mother because she's fucking... Mother's been in on it. Mother's been in on it. But then she escapes. So she gets on the ship. She's got the cat. She closes the door. She makes it. The ship takes off

with like I think 10 seconds to spare as it's like counting down. And so she needs to get away. And so the ship is like taking off and it's like counting down 10, 9, 8. And she's still like the ship is so big she's still. She's too close. She's too close. Yeah, and it's going to be an enormous explosion.

Yeah, she's going to die if the ship doesn't get away fast enough. Right. And like by the hair of her teeth. By the hair of her teeth. Is that a thing? I don't think so. No, I think it might be. Skin of her teeth. Skin of her teeth. I'm so bad at those things. Oh my! Skin or hair, so they're

both the same So by the hair of her teeth she gets So the ship gets away from the big ship And boom it explodes And we're talking like not one explosion Like two I think there were three or four And it's like a planet exploding Behind her

And the alien is on the big ship She's away she's got the cat She's her and Jonesy. Just the two of them. And she's just like, I did it. I did it. And she's cool as a cucumber. She's, I mean, and she, so then she gets undressed.

She gets undressed. Because you have to be in your underwear to get in the space pod, I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the icy bed. And to freeze yourself, you have to be close to your bed. So she strips down and you see a lot of butt crack. And I was like, Sigourney. A lot of butt crack.

A lot of butt crack. Some of that butt crack was in the trailer. Yeah. Yeah and you see a lot of butt crack and I was like Sigourney. A lot of butt crack. Some of that butt crack was in the trailer. Yeah. It's a lot of butt crack. But first she puts Jonesy in the bed. She puts Jonesy in a little bed. She is her priority. Wait, in a little freezer bed? Yeah. This is so cute. Yeah, Jonesy gets to put in a little pie. She puts him in the freezer bed. Closes it. And she's about

to go to her thing. And now keep in mind that this ship it's very dark very dark and small this one is small it's very small and it's got um like a lot of black tubing uh lots of black tubing and what we realize is that one of the tubes just moved oh no and she turns around and sees it and now remember when i said that the alien has like kind of a black banana head? Uh-huh. When you lay that black banana head on its side, it looks like black tubing. Like a tube.

Oh, no. It has crawled into a crevice. No. And it's on the ship with her. No. And we see its hand reaches out. And this is the first time we've seen its hand. It's like this gnarly, like long.

Claw. Black fingers. Fingers. Like 10 inches. Oh, no. And she screams but runs very quickly and hides in a closet. Like a closet of

space. And it's a closet of, like, spacesuits. Oh, my man. So she's watching it and she's like, what the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck? Because now she's on a tiny, tiny ship. Now she has to kill it. There's no other way. She's got to kill this ship. Now she has to kill it. Yes. There's no other way. She's got to kill this thing. It's her versus the alien.

Yes. And so at this point, she grabs a weapon. It's some kind of gun. She like steps into a suit. Yeah. As she's in the closet, she's like stepping into this space suit.

She's slowly stepping into the suit, putting it on. She's a fucking badass. Puts on the space helmet. She's like securing herself, making sure it's airtight. And once it's airtight, she's got her suit on suit on she's got the gun and the alien is like kind of was it crawling out of the yeah like get itself out of the nook that it had put itself in yeah

so it's crawling out it's about to stand up it's got its freaky big mouth and she blows the airlock to blow it out into space oh got it got it. And of course it grabs on. So it's like hanging on. So she shoots it with the gun. The like cattle prod thing. But it turns out it has a rope. So she shoots the alien, knocks it off, and the door slams shut.

Oh, but it's holding onto a rope? It's holding onto the rope. So it's trailing behind the ship. It climbs up the rope very quickly, and it's on the ship. Oh my God. So it's immune to space. It's immune to space. It's not

imploding and exploding at the same time. It's fine for it. As Ash said, it's a beautiful creature. And at this point, she's like, I mean, I don't know if she says it, but in my mind, she's like, fuck you. And she hits the engines and that blows it away from the ship.

So whether it's alive or dead. Who cares? She blasted out into space. She blasted out into space. Okay. So now it's just like floating around in space and not her problem anymore. And she's away from it. Yeah.

She's away from it. And she survived and she gets into her sleepy bed. She makes, well, she sends one final message. She sits in front of the thing and she's like, this is my name. Yes. This is what happened. My name's Ripley. I was in this big crew.

The alien came. I'm the last one left I'll be here oh I'm gonna freeze myself like direct herself back to earth on that thing I think she's hoping for that but I don't think she really knows how like she's like oh right

she's not a pilot yeah so she explains who she is and what happened and like puts herself in a freezer pod with the cat and they go to sleep. Just like hoping for the best. Hoping for the best. Right. That someone will come and rescue her. Wow. Wow.

That was great. It's so good. How many of these movies are there? There are tons, right? Tons. Well, there's like three in this first early trilogy and then they started making more. Then we got some Sweet Alien vs. Predator crossover. Right, I remember that.

There's Alien 1, Alien 2, she ends up going to a colony, finds more aliens. The third one, she goes to a prison planet. The fourth one, Winona Ryder joins the cast. Oh, I forgot about the fourth one. And then I think that's when they started doing the Alien Predator. This came out in 79, Aliens, the sequel. It, I forgot about the fourth one. And then I think that's when they started doing the alien predator. Then Prometheus, then Alien Cup.

Yeah, those ones are first. This came out in 79, Aliens, the sequel. It came out in 86, so they really took their time getting to that second movie. But it really is a very open-ended, you're sort of like, hope she's okay. I mean, she survived, but who knows? That's a good way to end it. I like that ending

more than it just being like, the alien's still in the ship. And then they cut away. I feel like they could easily have done that. It's nice because like at least in like horror movies, it's like you escape the house or you escape the small cornfield or you return to civilization. But like with this, you don't. You don't. And she's like just alone.

Except she has the cat. Yeah. I don't know how you process that kind of trauma alone in space. Well, she's just frozen. You froze yourself. She's not processing it because she's not aware of anything. She'll only have to process it once she gets found. Which she does get found and she has a hard time.

Spoiler for aliens, which I have seen very recently. She has a lot of post-traumatic stress and doesn't want to go back and see the aliens again because it was bad. That checks out. I'm really glad that they did that because I feel like too often movies just pretend like the main character is. She's a mess.

She's a mess. But rightfully so. Yeah. I want to see it. I'm curious now. Does Ridley Scott do any more? No. They're all directed by different people. I think it's James Cameron that's aliens. There's one that's directed by the director of Omelie, if I'm not mistaken. What?

That's interesting. I think it's either three or four, obviously. And it's like a quirky... It really is. It's like it has like that style. I can't remember his name. Jean something. That makes sense.

Jean-Mauve Frenchman. French director Jean... And he has like a very specific style. So Jenna, Silent Jenna and I watched all four in a row once. We marathoned it. Nice. And you can really tell the directing styles. It was very fun.

That is cool. Wow. That was a roller coaster and I really enjoyed it. It's really, really good. Makes me want to watch it again too. I kind of want to watch it. Everybody buy a big TV. Watch Alien.

Yeah. It's really good. Invite your friends. Don't watch it alone. Don't watch it alone. It really is scary. Rex, thank you so much for coming on. Thanks for having me. Thank you. You were an amazing guest. You really remembered the movie so well. You don't have notes or anything. Made my job easier. I was nervous. You were an amazing guest. You really remembered the movie so well. You don't have notes or anything.

Made my job easier. I was nervous. You kept me on point. I'm glad to know that I could help in that way. Seriously, though. You guys did great. I really felt like I watched it. All right. Thank you. We still haven't figured out how to end this podcast. We never have. We never will.

Yeah, because there aren't really any scary voices in this one. I was trying to give an impression. No one can hear you scream. I was going to say, remember, no one in space has ice cream. Oh. No one in space has ice cream. And with that, goodbye.

Goodbye. Goodbye. Hi, guys. Sammy here. Thank you so much for listening to another episode of too scary didn't watch we had such a great time with Rex talking about this fucking awesome movie make sure to check out Rex's book free lunch it is available on Amazon there is a link in the episode description so make sure to check that out. And if you liked the episode, please head over to Apple Podcasts and rate and review us. We'd really appreciate it. And also make sure you subscribe so you get all the latest episodes and follow us on social media

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