Toronto Mike'd: The Official Toronto Mike Podcast - Festivus Ep: Toronto Mike'd #209
Episode Date: December 23, 2016Mike celebrates Festivus with Elvis and they discuss a cornucopia of fun topics....
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Welcome to episode 209 of Toronto Mic'd, a weekly podcast about anything and everything.
Proudly brought to you by Great Lakes Brewery, a local independent brewery producing fresh craft beer.
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ingredients and refrigerated kits directly to your door.
I'm Mike from Toronto, Mike.com and joining me this week for the special Festivus episode of Toronto.
Mike is Elvis.
Monica was correct.
And Dwight Drummond was too nice.
Yes,
she is correct.
You're not cool enough for the song.
Oh, absolutely. Bang on. I don't know. yes, she is correct. You're not cool enough for this song. Absolutely.
Bang on.
I don't know.
Dwight has a bit more credibility
when it comes to these beats than you do.
He didn't disagree.
He witnessed the birth of Maestro Fresh West.
He didn't disagree.
He loves this track.
I think right now when he goes for runs,
he puts this on his iPod, I think.
Oh, really?
No, but he should.
Hey.
Hey, Mike.
How are you?
Happy Festivus, man.
It's been a long time, my friend.
Such a long time.
Happy Festivus.
It is here.
I'm excited to air my grievances.
Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son.
I reached for the last one they had.
But so did another man.
As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.
What happened to the doll?
It was destroyed.
But out of that, a new holiday was born.
A festivus for the rest of us.
Can you imagine a world without that man?
It's sad that he's gone.
He's still with us.
Isn't he?
Didn't he die?
No.
I thought Ben Stiller's dad died.
Did he?
Frank Costanza died?
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that he died.
I could be wrong.
The mom definitely died.
Oh, maybe that's why
I'm thinking of.
She died.
For some reason,
I'm Googling it.
Okay, good.
Because I never Googled
that show.
That would be horrible.
My belief is that Frank Costanza is still with us.
But he could be gone.
I may have...
You know what?
He could be gone.
They fight over me.
Yeah.
Ben Stiller's...
I can't even remember his name.
I know he's an elderly man, but for some reason I thought he was still breathing.
Yeah.
That was...
You know, it's such a classic episode.
And it's funny to hear Jerry talk about it. He's, he's been interviewed about it in the past and saying that, you know, they came, obviously it was one episode out of hundreds that they had. And he, he was surprised that he was sort of late to the party realizing how much of us were celebrating Festivus. But, um, it is funny how that one episode has just caught on. And I have a pole in my house. I find tinsel distracting.
I do the feats of strength as has been witnessed on Facebook and Instagram over the last number of years with my family.
Let me ask some questions.
So this is all real, right?
You're not doing a bit.
This is real.
You have.
He is alive.
Okay.
He's 89 years old.
It was her.
His mom died.
Anna Mira.
In 2015.
Right.
My bad.
Thank you. Because Ben Stiller's dad, whose name is Jerry. Jerry Still her. His mom died. Anna Mira. Yeah, in 2015. Right. My bad. Thank you.
Because Ben Stiller's dad, whose name is Jerry.
Jerry Stiller.
Jerry Stiller.
Still alive, people.
So 2016.
By the way, there's still days left in 2016, so be careful.
Gerald Isaac Stiller.
So this is not a bit.
I have a pole in my basement that I have up in my area.
And we do Feats of Strength.
that I have up in my area.
And we do Feats of Strength.
Now, if my mother is listening to this,
she will tell you that she believes the Feats of Strength are real.
But I have little children.
Yeah, you could not lose it if it was real.
They're not fighting each other.
You know what?
I'm going to lift the veil here.
And the pictures that you're going to see online today
are staged photos. i don't encourage
my family to fight and and clearly if there was a real fight my two-year-old isn't fucking winning
you know what though you say that but if i if i did the feats of strength for real
my 15 year old almost 15 year old son would always win i could not win that totally understand i mean
my but i would come in second. My oldest is
seven. But it is funny.
It makes for funny photos when
you have a two year old standing on your chest with
the Hulk Hogan bicep curl.
Do you also have a Christmas
tree in your house?
There's two Christmas trees in the house.
So the holidays can coexist.
Festivus and Christmas. The secular
Christmas. These holidays can coexist.
Yeah, different people celebrate different things in my household.
But you celebrate Festivus.
I celebrate Festivus, yes.
And my children are confused immensely by it.
But it's fun.
I enjoy it.
Well, it shows your true devotion to the sitcom Seinfeld.
That is quite the...
And I made a donation to the Human Fund today.
Mike, you have a coffee.
That's my donation to the Human Fund.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I'm drinking.
And it's like a venti, right?
It is.
Which means...
It's a Festivus venti.
It sets you back a few bucks.
This is no joking around.
And there's snowman cookies upstairs.
Oh my gosh.
I didn't even...
You didn't open the bag.
I'm sorry.
Do you want a drink?
I wish I could, but I'm driving home.
What about a water?
I had an espresso. It doesn't have to be alcoholic.
I had an espresso before I got here.
I love this episode. It's so festive
and fuck you, man.
It's great.
It's been a long time. We're going to get this.
Your last episode was 186.
Holy shit.
And this is 209.
So that's a massive amount of time.
That is.
Because I only do like one a week.
Long time.
And last time I saw you, you were clean shaven.
Yeah.
And we got to get a picture, okay?
Because I have a picture from last time.
I was thinking about that.
Yeah, we should get a picture.
Honestly, when I answered the door, I thought the Unabomber was at the door.
I thought Ted fucking Kaczynski was at my door.
Yeah, I haven't cut my hair or shaved in months.
Well, not months.
I shouldn't say that.
Maybe three months.
Yeah, months because you haven't been here in months.
And I don't oil my beard, so it is just a scraggly mess.
Now, a funny story.
About three weeks ago, my manager starts my one-on-one with her,
or she starts one-on-one with me, or she starts a one-on-one
with me, and she's like, look, before we get started, I have to
ask you a question. What the fuck's up
with the beard? And I laugh. I didn't
know what to say. And she's like, I know I'm not supposed to
ask you this, but what's going
on with the beard? And I laughed again, because I thought it was
a joke. And she's like, no, I'm serious.
This is the person you report to?
Correct. What is going on with the beard? Are you depressed?
Are you crying out for help? Is there something going on? What's going on with the beard? Are you depressed? Are you crying out for help?
Is there something going on?
What's going on with the beard?
And I'm like, look, I don't know.
I guess I have no fucks left to give.
I just didn't want to shave for a while.
And she's like, I need an endgame.
I need you to tell me what's happening here so that I can feel better about this situation.
That's a good question because it could be a sign of depression.
You let it all go, man. I'm not sure she's allowed to ask me that, though. No, but good question because it could be a sign of depression. But it's. You let it all go, man.
I'm not sure she's allowed to ask me that, though.
No, but she's probably asking you as a friend.
Right.
So I said, well, I don't really know what's going on with it,
but I do have an idea now that it's gotten this far that I'm going to try and find some white paint
and paint my hair and beard white and be Santa Claus for my children on Christmas.
That's amazing.
And she says, OK, if you come back in January with a beard, then we'll continue this conversation.
Otherwise, I'm content with what the end game is at this moment.
I thought it was hilarious.
Two words and you're out of that.
Just say religious ordinance.
That's it.
When you're done.
She won't touch that with a 10-foot Festivus pole.
She knows that that's not true.
Well, you celebrate Festivus.
It is.
There could be something there.
We're making up these rules as we go along anyways.
Why not like you've got to grow a beard after like ā
You know, I'm at the point where I don't even know if I'll make it through the holidays.
I can't do that.
So what you're doing there, which is an impressive homeless man thing,
I see cornflakes in there.
There is a lot of ā
You know what?
The most surprising thing, and you would have
this too,
I didn't realize how much gray I had.
It's a massive amount. If I go
six days, I got a white
white. Yeah, and this is only like three days
or whatever.
I was like, wow.
Yeah, yeah. But your hair is
hanging on somehow. My hair's
been white for like ten years now. Yeah, yeah, my hair surprisingly, not only is it stained, I remember when I got together with Mrs. Elvis, it was clear that I was losing. And she's like, you just have to keep the hair until we get married. Right. Until the actual wedding day. And then it was there then. And then it became it has to be there for the first kids photos. And then the second's photos. Now we have three kids and not one word about losing my hair anymore.
I think I have a little bit of a patch in the back, but I can't really see that, so it doesn't bother me.
And now that it's uncouth or whatever, it just looks like a rat's nest.
First of all, you're living my dream.
Like I said, I can't do it.
If I go one week, it looks bad, first of all.
It looks bad.
And secondly, my neck is really itchy when I
sleep, and I have to at least get it out.
I used to shave the neck part, but now even that
is gone, and I don't even notice it.
It's long enough now. It's fucking great. You went past the painful part.
It's great. Yeah, yeah. So good for you. We'll get a photo
because, honestly, I thought Ted Kaczynski
was... I don't know. You have to Google it. Is Ted Kaczynski
still alive? No.
Didn't they give him the chair, right? Or a lethal injection?
I don't know what state he... That was Montana or something Or a lethal injection? I don't know what state he did.
That was Montana or something, wasn't it?
I don't know.
Some backwoods fucking place.
He was old when he was old.
So, okay.
By the way, his manifesto, great piece of writing.
If you could ever get your hand on the Unabomber manifesto, it's a great piece of writing.
I don't condone his activity.
I've got a couple of...
Before I play any more festive music, I need to make a couple of...
He's alive.
He's 74 years old.
Jerry Stiller and Ted Kaczynski are alive.
We're doing well.
Eight life terms without parole.
I guess that's a state
without the capital punishment.
I have a couple of somber notes, though.
Montana.
A long time...
Actually, a listener since day one
who I only knew via Twitter,
but he was actually a patron,
which means he was paying money every month
to support this endeavor.
His name was Norman Forbes.
So you might even recognize Norman Forbes as a guy.
He would tweet at, he tweeted at me a lot
after every episode.
So someone else he would tweet at
because he loved Pete Fowler's show, The Lost Indie City.
So he's a former CFNY DJ, Pete Fowler.
So Pete Fowler noticed that Norman Forbes was quiet on Twitter for like a month.
So Pete actually went to Facebook and left a note on Facebook like,
I hope you're doing okay, Norman.
Haven't heard from you in a while.
And someone in Norman's family
let Pete know that Norman
passed away suddenly.
I think he was,
I'm going to get the age wrong,
he was a younger man,
like 50 years old or something.
So Pete let me know
because Norman was a big fan of my show
and I didn't know him
but I felt like I knew him
because he was so engaged
with the program and stuff.
So I just want to dedicate this Festivus episode
to Norman Forbes, who was a big fan of Toronto Mike,
a big fan of the Lost Indie City,
and loved Danny Elwell's work on the jazz station.
So we lost a good one in Norm.
Here's to you, Norm.
And another, and I was surprised to learn this
from Greg Brady,
but a big fan
of this podcast
is Ken Daniels.
You know Ken Daniels?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Ken Daniels.
I don't know him.
He does the Detroit Red Wings.
Well, I don't know him,
but I...
You know of him.
Yeah, yeah, of course.
So I want to send
my condolences to Ken
who lost his son.
So his son died suddenly.
I know, in like early 20s.
I know.
It's fucking horrible.
There's nothing
and I thought the same thing
when,
who went through this?
Aaron Davis went through this too
and I was thinking,
you know,
I got four kids,
you got three kids.
There's nothing.
I can't imagine.
I don't like it
when you have the flu.
I don't like it.
I can't imagine.
Yeah, yeah.
So Ken,
I'm thinking of you
and I'm very sorry
for your loss
and yeah,
terrible, terrible. That is terrible. So let's change gears and talk about your absence here Sorry for your loss. Yeah. Terrible.
Terrible.
That is terrible.
So let's change gears and talk about your absence here, okay?
Your last episode was 186.
Yep.
These are the episodes.
You tweeted this.
I know.
Because I put the list down for this.
Right.
So I screen capped it and said, well, I have all this work I did.
I'm tweeting this. So these are the episodes recorded in this lovely basement since your last episode, 186.
I just want to know whether...
What's the over-under on how many episodes I listened to?
I know the number.
I mean, you're asking me to guess?
How many did I listen to?
I'm just digesting.
I'm still drinking my coffee.
Remember, it has to be a half.
I'm going to say you've listened to, of these 22 I'm going to read, I'm going to say you've heard
two of them. That's my guess. Two.
Which would be more than normal.
Usually you listen to none. So in that case, the over-under
would be two and a half and you're getting the under.
Right. And I have some
inside info that you referenced an episode
to me via the Google Hangouts.
So I know you listened to one.
Normally I would think zero, but now I'm thinking
I'm taking the under at two and a half.
Okay.
So, the lovely Jackie Redmond.
I did not listen to it.
Any interest in the lovely Jackie Redmond?
Sure.
Okay.
She's lovely.
Yeah.
Clearly.
Carolyn Cameron.
I did not listen.
Those two are back-to-back, and it's funny because they're kind of similar.
They're both young Sportsnet people.
I did not listen to her either.
Any interest?
Okay, that's all you did.
You told me to be nice. Yes or no, and then whether you have any interest.
No, I want the truth. I want real talk.
For the first time, Mike gave me orders before we
started, for the record.
He wants me to be nice. I'll explain later when I get
to the survey. We'll explain
why I want you to be nice, okay?
So, Carolyn Cameron.
No, I did not listen.
And no interest?
Sure, there is an interest.
Liza Fromer.
I did not listen, but there is an interest.
It's on my phone.
Steve Dangle.
I did not listen.
You're kind of old for Steve, actually.
My son knows him and likes him. I don't know who Steve is.
Yeah.
I feel embarrassed to say some of these things.
No, no, no, no.
I would have to look up.
I'm sure if I got the context, I would.
Are you 40 yet?
Yeah, I am 40.
You're 40 on the go, right?
Yeah, I'm 40.
40-year-olds don't really go to this jump cut YouTube style
that deployed by Steve Dangle.
It really is aimed at my son, like 15 or 16.
Gotcha.
It's younger set that likes this style. And old guys like us don't know Steve Dangle. He's good at what he does, like 15, 16. Gotcha. It's a younger set that likes this style
and old guys like us
don't know Steve Dangle.
He's good at what he does,
but it's not for us.
So Dave Hodge.
I didn't listen,
but it's on my phone.
I want to listen.
Absolutely.
You have to listen to Dave Hodge.
Yeah, yeah.
And you talk about the pen flip.
Well, this is the thing.
According to...
He's sitting there
and I haven't recorded yet
and we're talking about,
you know, be on the mic.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I give my speech,
which I don't give to you because I'm hoping you hit your head so yeah you hope i hit that yeah
after and i said ever since ever since colleen rush home that's right i say after we record
you're gonna have a natural desire to jump up do not because right about you cannot stand correct
and i don't i didn't give this speech to a few special people, including Siobhan Morris.
Like, there's a Jackie Redmond.
There are some people who did.
Dave Hodge, though, isn't very tall, is he?
Tall enough for you.
I'm tall enough.
Like, you and I hit our heads here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're not that tall.
We're not 5'10".
I'm less than that.
I'm 5'9".
No, I'm 5'10".
You're wearing the lifts, though.
Dave Hodge, so before we record, he says to me, I don't want to talk about the pen flip oh yeah yeah yeah while we
go here i'll if i have any interesting tips interesting i don't want to talk about the
pen flip and i looked at him and i because i realized a massive component of my uh desire
is to talk about the pen sure of course, of course. That was an iconic broadcasting moment. And I said to him, I said, I'm going to reference
the pen flip
and I'm going to play
a short clip
and what you say
in regards to the pen flip
is, of course, up to you.
But I'm going to ask
about the pen flip.
Like, I basically
am telling him now.
He's sitting here.
I'm going to ask about the pen flip.
What you say is,
and this is true,
like, I can't make you,
I can't give you
the Shapiro shuffle
where I pick you up
by the scruff of your collar
right against the wall and tell me about blundell did you have a hashtag that said real talk on like
a flash card absolutely yeah i should put that on the wall here and point to it dave
that was the greatest comments back from that episode of todd you weren't hard enough on him
he's in your fucking basement for also he wants he's not, he's not old enough to retire. He actually has desires
of working. He would have liked to get a
gig with a Rogers
station, for example.
So anyway, what did he respond to that?
Dave Hodge, when he said that?
He accepted my terms.
I didn't want to
blindside him by the fact, hey, I'm playing the clip, I hear
a pen flip. And then we have to listen to the episode to see how he reacts.
So now I'm there, and I do it. I play the clip, and I even play some Ron McClain, hey, I'm playing the clip. I hear a pen flip. And then we have to listen to the episode to see how he reacts. So now we're there and I do it.
I play the clip and I even
play some Ron McClain because we had talked about the pen
flip and Ron did a great job describing
it. Ron, what an episode.
Okay, so Dave Hodge is here now. Dave Hodge,
he talks a bit about the pen flip.
I work with him. I'm pretty
good at this now, actually.
Honestly, he gave me so much.
You've got to hear this episode. He gave me so much for a guy who did not want to talk about the pen flip.
I got so much from him.
I gave myself a Pulitzer.
I gave myself a Pulitzer Prize.
Well, you already have a Gemini.
That's right.
Absolutely.
Best blog on the movable type platform, 2003.
Dave Hodge, so you're going to hear that.
Ann Roszkowski.
I didn't really have an interest to listen to that.
I like her as a broadcaster.
I think she's really good, but I didn't have an interest until I listened to the Dwight
Drummond one, which, so spoiler alert.
Oh, yeah.
Now I've got to change my over-under.
That's two now.
So I definitely will listen to that one for sure.
Sounds like there's some good stuff there.
You have to listen to that one.
But, I mean, it's not a big surprise, I guess, that Gordon Martin was a dick. It's a surprise
to that extent of dickdom.
It's one thing to be a dick. Isn't that a thing, though?
Remember there was that clip that went on on the internet?
We talked about that, too.
I don't think that it's a surprise, but it is a surprise
that it was three years he didn't talk to her.
That's a horrible working environment.
Five days a week, you're
recording side by side. Your shoulders
are touching.
To not talk to that person when the red light's not on.
It probably happens more often than we know.
I bet you it does.
That's why I have real talk.
I need to know.
Real talk. Okay?
I need to know.
See, Siskel and Ebert had a thing.
They did.
But they had a mutual respect.
So did Jerry and Tom.
Jerry and Tom.
Oh, Tom and Jerry.
Tom and Jerry.
Yeah, I only know them as Tom and Jerry.
Just Jerry and Tom throws me, okay?
Yes, but they had a mutual respect.
Correct.
But you have to.
And did Anne say that she didn't respect Gord?
No, the opposite would be true.
Sorry, Gord didn't respect Anne?
Clearly, because they didn't,
not even a civil hello before recording.
You have to hear it.
Okay.
By the way, and I don't know if I've ever revealed this,
maybe I have, but in like 2006, late 2006, Humble and Fred stopped talking to each other.
Did I ever tell that story?
Maybe.
But they were both talking to me, but they wouldn't talk to each other.
Well, I know that story.
Okay, well, maybe you know it.
You tell me.
They actually canceled the Christmas special because they were never going to record ever again together.
Wow.
It was done.
Humble and Fred were done.
And I wrote an entry about how like 20 years and. Humble and Fred are done. I wrote an entry about how
20 years and out, Humble and Fred are done or whatever.
I actually wrote about it without the specifics.
Of course, they kissed and made up and now
they record every day and they're friends again.
But there was a time when they would not talk to each other.
Who was...
How did it thaw?
No, no, no.
How did I bring them together like the peacemaker I am?
Is that what you're going to ask?
Adam Stiles.
No.
Didn't listen to it.
He's a weather guy for City, in case you're wondering who Adam Stiles is, because the
name recognition is not as high as some of these others.
Maestro Fresh Wes.
Yeah, I didn't listen to that one, but I want to, obviously.
Clearly, he's a legend.
He signed my 12 inches.
It's been the guest that you wanted.
That was your...
That's right.
That's why I started the podcast.
Yeah, you might as well stop the podcast now. I told my brother Steve. It's been the guest that you wanted. That was your... That's right. That's why I started the podcast. Yeah, you might as well stop the podcast now.
I told my brother Steve, that's it.
It was all a ruse for that moment to get Maestro to sit there for two hours.
It was all a ruse.
Was it a two-hour episode?
I think it was 90 minutes, but we talked a lot after because he wanted to tell me about
some of the stuff he's up to and he's writing.
He was a very friendly guy.
Yeah.
Even though for half of the episode, his eyes were closed.
And it really messed me up because I do a lot of what I'm doing now
with my steel blue eyes.
Was it because he's clearly a thoughtful guy?
Well, he said he was tired.
But he was answering my questions.
So he wasn't asleep.
But he was semi. I don't know what he was doing.
It was kind of scary.
Patty Sullivan.
Did your kids ever watch Patty on C CBC Kids or anything like that?
Yes.
Yes.
Okay.
But no interest in the legendaries.
I didn't listen.
I didn't listen.
Okay.
But I also, you know, I like to know if you're going to listen.
You're not giving me that part.
I am giving it to you.
All right.
Then there was a Mark Wise blog episode.
He's the 1236 guy.
And we always talk about like happenings in media.
So I didn't listen to that one.
I probably won't listen to it.
But as a result of your blog, I subscribe to his newsletter.
Well, he's coming in next week.
I get that every...
And he's the guy who supposedly is your new co-host.
Because I've been fired, right?
Is that the thing?
Fired is a funny term.
You're unavailable.
I'm going to be honest.
It's like the beard.
I'm like your direct report.
It's hard where I live and where I work.
I know.
Well, you haven't been here since 186, and it's not like you weren't invited.
I enjoy his newsletter.
I'm a subscriber and a fan of his work.
Do you like his voice?
Never listened to an episode to know what his voice sounds like.
And I'm going to get to this later, but I did a survey, and a lot of people...
Now, I happen to absolutely love his voice.
You were in his newsletter.
Oh, I'm in there all the time.
About three weeks ago. I break
lots of interesting Toronto media stories
and he likes to report on them.
Okay, who are we at now?
Tim Thompson. I did not listen to Tim Thompson.
He's the montage guy that Rogers
didn't want when they took over from CBC.
Joanne Wilder.
I didn't listen.
It's on my phone.
I will listen.
Although I did hear you got some flack for concentrating on Playboy so much.
How could I not?
Just like the pen flip.
How do you have Joanne Wilder on your show and not go to Playboy?
She's a really good broadcaster.
I do have some awkward.
I'm not sure how to talk to a woman about her naked photos she did for Playboy.
Yeah, like 100 years ago, too.
Did she talk about the reaction of the industry to that or her co-workers and stuff?
Like, was she treated differently?
Yeah, we talked about, like, for example, some shows that she wasn't allowed to mention it.
Like, I think, I can't remember now, but yes.
So listen to Joanna.
I will.
I'm a big fan of her.
She's a great broadcaster.
I think I'm going to have Andy Frost on the show.
Oh, nice.
I'll listen to that one.
But I still can't.
What eludes me is the legendary John Derringer
continues to elude me.
Well, we communicated with him.
I know, but I thought that the fact he listens
might warm him up.
He might be hearing these exact words.
He listens to this show.
Did you know that?
John Derringer.
So he can hear me now.
Do you know that for a fact?
Yeah, he tells me.
Oh, you were on it?
He'll even tweet.
Oh, you tweet back and forth?
We're Twitter friends is what I would say.
But anyway, I'm going to have Andy Frost on.
John Derringer is my favorite podcaster in the city.
Well, then I have to get him on.
He is a legend.
He is the best.
John Hayes is his real name.
Did you know that?
Yeah, and his brother is Hayes.
Well, his nephew is Brian Hayes,
who's on right now, TSN Radio.
No, there was another guy.
He was actually on the Q107.
Bill Hayes.
Bill Hayes, that's it.
Great voice, too. Love Bill Hayes, too. Big radio family there. They were both on Q107 TSN Radio. No, there was another guy. He was actually on the Q107. Bill Hayes. Bill Hayes, that's it. Great voice, too.
Love Bill Hayes, too. Big radio family.
They were both on Q107 for a while.
Yes. It was great.
Christine Bentley and Kate Wheeler.
I didn't listen, but
I bet you it was interesting.
It was interesting. Her story
goes back where she was stabbed,
randomly attacked in a Toronto mall
back in the mid-80s. She has a whole story there.
There's lots of... And Christine Bentley is
infamous because she
retired from FTO
CTV, but it turns out
revealed on this show, she was
actually told her time was up
and she was told to leave.
Happens in the industry, doesn't it? Yes, but
spinning it as a retirement was so she could have some
pride and say goodbye.
That's fair.
Instead of being walked out.
It's nice of her bosses to allow that.
Yeah, it's just unfortunate that her time was up
and her co-host, Ken Shaw's time
is still going, I noticed.
It seems to be a gender thing.
It's sexism at work.
So listen to that.
And then the Moroszkowski
and the Fromer
and you'll get a whole story there.
Humble and Fred.
No.
Divisive figures, polarizing figures.
A lot of people hate it when I have Humble and Fred on.
Yeah, I'm not a fan.
What, don't you like it?
Because you even sat at their table at my wedding.
I did.
Why did you do both of them?
I want to know because I was-
They're nice.
I mean, as individuals, they're nice.
Too many fart jokes?
No, no, no.
It's fine.
For me, as a fan of that show, which I was, as you know,
I think the initial connection that you and I had
is sort of a professional one.
Of course.
I was a fan of that show way back in the day,
but I'm not as much of a nostalgist as you are.
I am quite happy to move on and never think about
or worry about or whatever the right word is.
I am a nostalgist.
That's a good word for it.
I prefer, it's over for me. Speaking of nostalgia, Gino Retta.
It's on my phone. Want to listen real bad. I remember him being one of the very first people.
And I know Vic Rauter is on that list, too. Right. Yeah. Those two gentlemen being amongst the very
first broadcasters on television that I remember as a child when
TSN came on to cable and me wanting to be like them.
Here's some more.
Not that these are ones you missed, but guys like that are like Jim Van Horn.
Yeah, Jim Van Horn.
John Wells.
You know what?
It's funny that Jim Van Horn and John Wells, for that matter, seemed old then.
And now, you know, no offense to them, right?
But, you know, this was a, you know, early teenage kid or mid-teenage, I guess.
Yeah.
And they're still on the air.
Well, Jim Van Horn is not on the air.
He teaches at like a college.
And John Wells, they're both at this college that teaches sports media people.
Cool.
Yeah, which is interesting.
So, by the way, the other guy is Michael
Landsberg. He was there for the beginning. He was like a baby
face when he started, so he's still
in the business.
Yeah, I don't know. He was supposed to come on.
He's not coming over. I don't know. I can't get him here.
Christopher Ward.
No, I did not listen. First employee of MuchMusic, by the way.
Oh, wow. On-air employee, I should say.
Sofia Yurskovich.
I did not listen.
What did I do?
Fantastic woman.
I feel like your pronunciation was better in the Dwight Drummond podcast.
Of her name?
Yeah.
It's a tough one, but I got Marszkowski right.
Sofia, what a lovely woman.
Great conversation.
To a point where I would have her as your replacement.
Great chemistry, too.
Love that.
Sure it is. Dwight Drummond.
Listened. Enjoyed it. That's one.
I really enjoyed it. Do I have a bell here?
How about that?
That's my sleigh. I really enjoyed
it. It was good. You know what?
I like him as a broadcaster because
similar to how he described
Moses'
philosophy of hiring broadcasters, of hiring people, being real.
Yes.
Even on CBC, you know, the really professional broadcast just seems like a regular real dude.
I agree.
And I like him.
I like the authenticity.
He's really good at reading the news.
And he was a security guard at Electric Circus, but we'll get to that.
Hold that rant.
Hold it.
I know you got one in you.
Chris Zelkovich.
I listened.
Two!
I'm going to lose this bet.
You are.
He's one of my favorite columnists,
so I was really excited.
It was the second...
Oh, no, we lost Elvis.
It was the second...
Hold on, I've got to play your bells.
It was the second episode I listened to on my list,
and he didn't disappoint.
But you'll rant at me later.
You know what?
I will say that he writes a nerdy column that both of us really enjoy because we like the
sports media type of thing.
And he seems like the perfect guy to write about it because he did come across a little
nerdy, which is fine.
It's not a criticism.
Do you think he liked my theme song? I don't even think
I asked him, but would he be a fan of my theme song?
No, he clearly said he didn't
listen to... He says, as cruel as Dwight is,
Chris is the bizarro, right?
Yes. Yeah, they're the complete
opposite. Nice guy, and we had a good
chat. He seemed like a nice guy. So that's two.
Stephanie Smythe.
Did not listen.
Okay, she's from CP24
Bob Elliot
loved it
what a fantastic fantastic podcast
slow the fuck down Elvis
I need to digest this hold on
he's a fantastic
writer
and it's a shame
that he's not on primetime anymore
because he's also a really good
storyteller. Although he putting two awkward individuals in the same room doesn't lend for
great punchlines in the story. It was quite funny to hear him tell a story and then you either not
get the punchline or not find the punchline funny, or him just not having a punchline.
And the awkward laughs between the two of you
was quite enjoyable to hear.
It was good.
I don't know what you're talking about,
but you're entitled to this opinion.
Okay.
There was a lot of stories that he had told.
Well, let me just tell you.
It was like a big buildup and you'd be like.
Well, first of all, I will give a guy telling me great stories,
I will give him a courtesy laugh.
Right.
I think I do pick up the punchlines,
and sometimes they're weak sauce,
but I give a courtesy chuckle.
I don't want,
I want him to see me have a courtesy chuckle,
so that he feels like he delivered the punchline.
Please, I'm good to my guests.
This guy, Bob Elliott.
I'm not saying you weren't.
Bob Elliott.
I used to have a commute to work.
This is four or five years ago.
Yeah.
But I would,
on the drive home,
I would often tune in primetime sports.
There were certain guests I would just adore.
They went long.
I remember sometimes they would go like 15, 20 minutes, which was amazing.
One of the guests, by the way, I didn't even have to love this.
I'm not a boxing guy.
I'm not a boxing guy.
Sugar.
Are you talking about Sugar?
What's his name?
Bob Sugar.
Bob Sugar.
Burt Sugar. Burt Sugar. Sugar. Are you talking about Sugar? What's his name? Bob Sugar. Bob Sugar. Is that Burt Sugar?
Burt Sugar.
Okay.
So, yeah.
Good.
So, whenever Burt Sugar was on, I clung to every word, okay?
It was unbelievable.
Because I loved his delivery and his stories.
And I don't even know.
I only can name.
Is Pac-Man still boxing?
I don't know any boxers.
But Burt Sugar was amazing to me, even though I wasn't a boxing guy.
Yep.
The Bob Elliott.
Robert.
Okay.
Robert.
When I hear, okay, hello, Robert.
Now I'm ready because this guy can tell a baseball story.
He knows his shit, and I love that voice.
Yeah, it's great.
Love it.
It's great.
He's phenomenal.
So I'm like...
Good job, Mike.
The fact that I got...
This is what gets me.
He sat where you sat, and I purposely didn't do a lot of off-topic chatter at the beginning.
I just wanted to keep it baseball.
I really tried to reduce all that other stuff just so he could talk.
And if you listen, I get complaints in the survey, I talk too much.
Well, I had that in the forefront of my head when Bob Elliott was sitting there.
I was like, I want 90% of this to be Bob Elliott's voice.
You were going to say something?
I was going to say it was a very different podcast than Zeljkovic
because for about 10 minutes or so, 10 to 12 minutes, I timed it.
You talked about either your sponsors or the bullshit story from Electric Circus.
The amazing story.
I know.
But off the top.
It was a really big buildup before we got into Zeljkovic.
We'll get to that.
Very opposite with Bob Elliott. Well, Bob, I didn't.
I purposely saved my
Ken Daniels and different things for you.
Right. Okay. So, Bob Elliott,
you don't come in enough. That's why they leak into the
No, I'm not complaining. I'm just
saying there was clearly a difference
in the way we do. So, two hours.
This is the first episode that exceeded two hours.
Yep. I think I
he came in with...
He came in, he had two Diet Cokes, one in each hand.
Like, he's double fisting these Diet Cokes.
And I'm thinking, oh, nice guy brought me a Diet Coke.
No, for him, right?
But that's what I'm thinking, right?
So we go downstairs.
What are we seeing here?
No, they're both for him.
He's going to down both of these Diet Cokes.
He didn't bring me a Diet Coke, which is fine.
Did he have to pee?
Yes.
This is the first episode that had a pee break.
Oh, really?
208 episodes. I never
picked up on that. No, because
he warned me beforehand he might need a pee break.
Right. And then he basically put up his hand
or whatever. And then I played, what I did
is I played one of those clips. I was playing
old baseball calls. I played the
Jackie Robinson clip. When the Jackie
Robinson clip is played, he's
peeing. And then I just stripped it.
It had some dead air.
And I just deleted it.
Oh, look at you.
Yeah.
Well, that was easy editing.
But yeah, we did have a pee break.
And Bob Elliott, two hours.
And I was thinking, like, do you have to?
This is my thought.
Do you have to be a baseball fan for that episode?
Like, that's a big investment.
Like, if you don't like baseball, can you?
I'm just thinking, well, if you like good stories and a good voice, you might still like it. But I don't know
because I am a baseball fan. But I
was thinking, this guy is the best.
And yeah, it is a terrible tragedy
that we will not hear him on primetime
sports. And I don't think he likes...
He definitely does not like to do anything
with his voice. He gets anxiety
and he doesn't like it. And he
said no to me. I asked him when he retired.
I asked him. He said no.
And I'm like, okay.
I get no's. I got a no from John Lott.
I got a no from Rosie DiManno.
And I got a no from Cathal Kelly.
And all of them said they're print only.
Respectfully, I don't do broadcasting.
Gotcha.
Well, and John Derringer said no, too.
Yeah, but he is a broadcaster.
Cathal Kelly, eh?
Yeah, yeah.
He says he doesn't do that.
I'm not a huge fan of his.
Well, I had questions for him.
He quit Twitter.
Did you know that?
Oh, did he really? Yeah. But, okay, he's not coming on. I'm not a huge fan of his. I had questions for him. He quit Twitter. Did you know that?
Oh, did he really?
Yeah.
But okay, he's not coming on.
But Bob Elliott came on two hours,
and it was the most amazing two hours to me because I was literally just talking to this awesome storyteller
about Andre Dawson and George Bell,
and it was like, I couldn't have happier.
And thank you for your compliments
because that was really fun to do.
And then since then, I had one episode.
Denise Donlan was in like two days ago.
I did not listen to that one either.
And she came in and she said to me,
uh,
how long do you need?
She's sitting there.
She goes,
how long do you need?
And I said,
how long do you have?
And then she said,
she laughed.
And then I said,
well,
I said,
well,
she goes,
Oh,
I want to be traffic or something.
Yeah.
Nicely.
Very nice lady.
And I said,
well,
I could probably try to keep this to an hour.
And she smiled and said, that's too long.
Can we do 30 minutes?
That's what she said.
Can we do 30 minutes?
Which I got from Hazel May and I got it from Roger Ashby.
Twice I've been told 30 minutes.
And Hazel was 45?
She was like 35 or something.
And Ashby was like 32.
But with Donlin, I know I can't do it in 30.
Like I know because I'm going to do much music for more than 30.
Like I can't do Donlin in 30. So I said to her, I'll do my best. I said,
touch your head because Alan Cross had this. He touched his head. He was out. Like, he tapped out.
I said, touch your head if I have to wrap up. So I said, I'll try to do 30 minutes. And I just did
my natural pocket. I did try to talk faster and I did cut a lot of stuff. Do you know what it ended
up being? What? An hour and 20 minutes. Holy shit.
She was okay with that. Well, I don't know.
Maybe she hates me. I don't know, but she was a
nice woman. Because she's nice, I don't really know.
I apologized to her and I never heard back.
I wrote her a Facebook message. Sorry that I tripled
what you asked for, but I honestly,
that hour 20 was the short version of
the Don Lent interview. Anyways, it's a good
interview. You should listen to it. Good. I did listen to it.
If people want to crowdfund Toronto Mike,
please go to patreon.com slash Toronto Mike.
That is where you can give like Santa
and save like Scrooge.
I think that was the Canadian Tire slogan.
I'm not sure.
All right.
I also want to tell people and Elvis
that there's beer. That beer is yours. I love it. I people and Elvis that there's beer.
That beer is yours.
I love it.
I love it, Mike.
Thank you.
You got a winter ale.
Thank you, Great Lakes Brewery.
There's also a pumpkin ale in here, which I'm excited about.
I can relive Halloween.
If you want, I'll give you a bonus pumpkin.
I'm trying to clear out the pumpkin.
I feel like December is too late for the pumpkin ale.
I love pumpkin.
I'll give you another one.
I'll give you another one. I'll give you another one.
This is great.
This is fantastic.
I would come here for free.
You know that.
It actually cost me money to come here.
And I'm okay with that.
But this is a nice reward.
So thank you to the folks at GLB.
By the way, they're great partners.
And they pursued me.
And I was hesitant at first.
Here's a message for our friends at Great Lakes Brewery.
I have a keg fridge at home now.
I've installed a bar in my basement.
Wow.
And I actually have a tap and there's room in there for a 20 liter torpedo.
If they happen to want me to try out something and comment on it,
I'm more than happy to put my keg fridge to good use.
Well, look at you.
My guy there
listens to every episode.
And he's a great guy.
I love their beer.
I don't buy much beer anymore because I do
have a keg fridge now because I just buy it in the
kegs.
I'm not a beer guy like you are, so
I can just tell you they're fantastic people
and they're local
and it has been a pleasure
to work with them in 2016.
So I hope they renew
so we have them back in 2017
because they're really cool guys.
Also, by the way,
Chef's Plate.
Oh yeah, this is new.
Well, it's new to you
because you haven't been here
in forever
but they deliver like meal kits
to your door
so you just,
at the door there's a box
and it's like a refrigerated box,
and there's portioned, farm-fresh, locally-sourced stuff.
No one can see it.
A guy at work uses these guys.
He loves them.
Yeah, and there's a cheat sheet.
Here's the directions,
and dummies can follow it.
It's like you can make your meal in 30 minutes or less, right?
Yes, and it's healthy and easy to do.
If you go to chefsplate.com
and use the promo code TorontoMike,
you get your first two plates for free.
Everybody should do that this holiday season.
Fucking A. Buddy, let's talk about
something I've been dying to talk to you about right off the top.
I know that sounds like that was a long introduction,
but here we go. TFC
made the finals. Are you aware?
MLS Cup? I was there.
Let me shut up and reduce
the volume on this wonderful Christmas song,
and let me hear you talk about what happened with TFC.
I'm going to get emotional here.
So I've been a seasoned seat holder of this team since day one,
all 10 years.
And I have to say, Mike, that that semifinal game against Montreal,
the second leg at home, we were down, losing in aggregate, and came back,
scored two goals in the 15-minute extra time. I can't explain the emotion that I felt in that
stadium. It was such a warm evening. It had been raining, but we were dry because we were under the
roof. I remember just standing on top of my seat with my arms in the air, screaming and crying.
It was an unbelievably great feeling. And then to see the captain Michael Bradley raise that
Eastern Conference Championship trophy was just, it was amazing. It was such a wonderful, wonderful
feeling. And then of course the final didn't end up the way that we wanted it to end up, but I was able to secure some hookups from a friend of mine who works at MLS, and I was treated like a VIP. I was still in my own seats, but got to go to a party the night before and a reception before the match.
It sucks to lose a championship to a team that doesn't get a shot on net and in penalties, but it is what it is.
The team far surpassed realistic expectations, and it's just been a wonderful run.
It was so great to see the city just, you'd walk down the city streets and you'd see people
wearing TFC scarves and it wasn't even a game day.
It was just, it's so great and so fun and just
really, you know, I, you've joked with me before about, uh, I can't remember what I was busting
your balls about and you're like, can't we just have nice things? And it was just a nice thing.
You know, it was a real nice thing. It was a lot of fun and I'm, I'm heartbroken. This is the first
I've talked about it since the loss. I like
my coworkers just know not to talk about it with me. Um, but I loved every minute of it. And,
and of course I want the result to be different, but it was just, you know, thank you. Thank you
to the club. Thank you to the players. It was just such a great season and it just makes next season,
um, that much, it's going to be that much more exciting. We've never had football here or soccer here in the city
in fucking December.
So this is all new.
Never felt this way before.
And to have the final here was just icing on the cake.
I jumped on that bandwagon.
You did, and I'm proud of you.
I watched every playoff game.
I was following your Twitter.
And I understood that even though you don't believe I did,
I did fully understand this two-leg aggregate.
You had no idea what was going on.
But I Googled it, and I understood it, and then I learned it, okay?
Because you're right.
I didn't know about the aggregate and the two-gauge.
Correct.
But then I did, and then I understood.
And because of that New York series, I was so aware, which we dominated,
and then I knew for the Montreal series it was the same rules.
I was surprised.
I don't know.
The final was a one game
winner take all.
And I was like,
oh, we don't have two legs here.
MLS is this interesting
combination of,
you know,
obviously Europe is primarily
a Europe or soccer
is primarily a European sport.
But then you have to throw
in the North American-ness,
right, for people to get,
you know, in Europe,
the big trophy to win
is the equivalent
of the president's trophy in the NHL.
The team that finishes first overall.
But that wouldn't fly here.
But that doesn't really mean much here.
No.
That's called the supporter shield in MLS.
For us, it's winning the playoffs.
Right.
And so, of course, you have to have the Super Bowl type game.
Talking to some of the people in the league, I'm going to guess that the two legs are going to go away, I think,
people in the league, I'm going to guess that the two legs are going to go
away, I think, because they realized
that the playoffs did drag on
a lot longer than they probably could have.
And it could have snowed heavily at B-Mobile
at that time of year. Well, because the next day
we had a big snowstorm. Oh, that's right. By the way,
a lot of people
are talking about what they call penalty kicks.
I want to call them penalty shots, but they're penalty kicks.
There is really, and correct me if I'm wrong,
and I'm kind of new to this sport,
but I have been watching a lot of World Cups and stuff,
so I'm familiar with ending important games this way.
You can't keep playing until you score,
because it could go forever.
And it happens in hockey, too.
It doesn't happen in playoff hockey.
Not in NHL playoff hockey,
but it does in world championships and the Olympics.
So it's not the only sport to do it,
and it's not a great way to win.
It's not a great way to,
certainly not a great way to lose.
But it is what it is.
You can't have, you know,
there was play, you know,
Giovenko came off
because he was severely cramped.
I got a lot of like,
you know how the city got,
there was a group of people
who like are just anti-soccer.
You might be familiar
with these people.
I think I was in this group
like 20 years ago,
but now I'm like fully converted.
What an atmosphere at BMO.
It's all thanks to you
because you,
and I'm thinking,
the team's around 10 years, right?
10 years old.
I'm going to say 2007, I think.
I believe I have a photo
that has timestamps on it.
That was the first season,
I think it was.
2007?
Okay, so 2007,
I'm at the game.
Right.
In your seat.
Correct.
And that was the conversion.
I went back and read your blog post.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because I have been to many Leaf games forever
and many Raptor games
and many Blue Jay games.
And I had never experienced an ambiance
where like when that first Diccio,
so Diccio scores at 21 minute mark?
24th minute.
24 minutes.
And it's like when the 24th minute of the game,
we all broke into this song, okay?
For Danny Diccio, yeah.
But there were a bunch of this,
but it wasn't led like in other sports, it's the scoreboards, like make some noise all broke into this song. Okay. But there were a bunch of this, but it wasn't led like in other sports.
It's the scoreboards, like make some noise or whatever and do this.
Okay.
In this TFC, it was all the fans were driving it on.
You had like drummers, like it was fan driven.
What a different experience.
So the Montreal experience, that semifinal second leg, the atmosphere was 10x anything
you've ever experienced before.
I was jealous.
I wanted you.
Who did you take your other seat?
And then in the extra time,
we sang the Dick Yo song again at the 24th minute
in the extra time.
Who got your second seat for that game?
So a friend of mine was supposed to come,
a buddy from high school was supposed to come for that.
A close buddy?
Yeah, a buddy from high school, a close buddy, yes,
was supposed to come because I was celebrating his 40th birthday.
And he wasn't able to make it.
So I took a coworker.
And we won.
So then I said, you have to come with me every single game now.
Bullshit.
And we both have to wear the same scarves.
How can a logical, reasonable, science-based man like you have such a superstition?
You absolutely have to.
And then ultimately, the person I brought to the final game
was that same high school buddy to celebrate his 40th birthday.
And that's why we lost.
Yeah, I blame it on her, for sure.
All right, I was just sad I didn't get an invite
to one of these memorable games in the supporter section.
It was luck that needed to be achieved.
Giovinco, before I forget, people are like,
this guy quit.
Because I think in Toronto, we're all hockey-minded, right?
So Bobby Bond scores in a broken leg, because that's what hockey players do.
Giovinco, in the, let me go back a bit. He comes off in the second leg of the Montreal series with cramps.
Correct.
So we think, oh, I hope he's better for the finals.
He plays the finals.
There was a two-week break. Two-week break he's better for the finals. He plays the finals. There was a two-week break.
Two-week break, and he plays the finals.
And then at some point late in the second half,
apparently he goes to the coach and says,
I can't move?
Correct.
Take me off.
Correct.
And we all see him on the sidelines having a hissy fit.
I guess he's upset that he can't play.
Well, everyone thought that he was upset at the coach
for being pulled, when in reality,
he was upset with being hurt.
People left comments.
I think they were ignorant
and I stood up for,
I'm like, benefit of the doubt.
We don't know.
But they were like,
Giovenko quit and you don't do that.
He didn't quit.
Because once he's off,
he can't do the penalty kicks, right?
Correct.
Because he's out of the game.
He can't come back once you go out?
No, that's it.
You're done.
So yeah, I mean,
I can imagine that that's fuel. He's not going to forget that and that's going to Interesting. You're done. So, yeah, I mean, I can imagine that that's fuel.
He's not going to forget that, and that's going to be fuel for next year.
But you can see the criticism.
Unless he's really hurt, which is possible.
But how hurt do you have to be not to play in that moment?
At some point, I mean, they could have scored and should have scored after he was pulled.
They didn't lose the game because he was removed from the game.
They had scoring chances after he left.
As a coach, you have to determine how much of a liability would he be
to remain on the pitch.
And that second game against Montreal,
the placement guy scored the big goal.
Correct.
When he came in, I told Monica, I said,
he's scoring the goal.
The Canadian kid, yeah.
Two saints.
Ricketts.
I said, he's scoring the goal.
The Canadian kid, yeah.
Toussaint.
But the thing that was criticism of the coach was, at the time,
oh, you're trying to strike lightning twice, right?
And it's tough to do.
But it's unfortunate.
You play that long in that weather, you're going to have things happen to your body.
It was fucking cold.
I guess you heard his comments, of course.
But he said the Argos were messing up the field,
and it caused him more cramping or whatever.
What are your thoughts on that?
Because I know you're not a fan of the Argos. It's absolutely true.
I mean, the Grey Cup played there.
It wasn't the Argos, because clearly the Argos suck so bad.
They can't even win anything.
That is true.
But yeah, I mean, as nice as the field looked,
apparently it was pretty torn up
because they played the Grey Cup there three days before.
Now, Elvis, you're Elvis.
I'm Elvis.
Freddie P.
Oh, boy.
Is still adamant that this is a fad.
TFC says MLS is a fad in Toronto.
And I always say, you know, what is it, 30,000 you get there?
He says there are only 30,000 fans in Toronto,
but they all go to the game.
He says the Argos are immensely more popular in Toronto than TFC.
And I'm tired of the argument.
We've actually called it truce
because I was getting so many long emails from him.
Why is he?
And I learned he revealed something to me that I didn't know.
In the 1970s,
Freddie P was in love with the Argos at Exhibition Stadium
to a point where he preferred the Argos to his Maple Leafs.
So here's what's happening in my opinion.
1970s Fred, full of life and hope, young Fred, the nostalgia factor for the Argos is so over the roof.
He cannot handle the reality of 2016 where the Argos are on the fringe.
But this has been for so long.
I mean, they've had flashes in the pan, right, Where they've, you know, the Rocket Ishmael.
And Flutie.
And Flutie.
And then they, you know, what was it, like 10 years ago?
But I don't think he can handle the fact that now the comparison is pretty fair.
Like you've got the Argos and the TFC playing at the same place in the same season.
So it's very easy to look and say, oh, look, on this Tuesday, the Argos had 13,000.
And on this Thursday, TFC had, I don't know, 25,000.
Well, their argument also is that the Argos get bad dates because TFC gets all the Saturday
dates because of, you know, whatever.
But we went through multiple seasons, TFC did, of having horrible, horrible dates because
we were the new club in the MLS and stuff.
So, and we still got, you know, 20, 25,000 people when that's how many people could fit in BMO.
So, yeah, I mean, he's got an ally in Chris Elkovich.
I heard him say that the Argos are more popular.
I know.
I put him on the spot for a decision and I was surprised.
And I get it.
TV ratings certainly seem to be the thing that pushes them over the edge.
But I don't see anybody walking around with an Argos
hat or scarf or anything
like that. This is my point. If you could measure a team's
popularity by like, jerseys
sold, for example,
you know, you got a lot of Leafs and Jays
and Raptors. They're a big three.
You can choose the order depending on who's playing and who's in the
playoffs or whatever. And then it's clear to
me, as a guy who bikes the city
and is along the waterfront every day.
Sure.
Not even close.
TFC gear versus Argos is like a no contest.
It's like 20 to 1.
You know, Larry Tenenbaum isn't up at night worrying about his investment in TFC.
He is about his investment in Argos, for sure.
The Facts of Life theme song, which is great.
Yeah.
I still know it.
It's great.
Do you know who wrote it?
Alan Fick.
Yes, he did.
Do you know what else he wrote?
He wrote a lot of game show themes as well.
Yeah, ones I never heard of, but not the new wheel.
He wrote the original Wheel of Fortune.
Oh, the Wheel of Fortune.
Wheel of Fortune.
I thought you were going to say Jeopardy.
No, Wheel of Fortune.
Because the new Jeopardy theme is not his, of course.
He did the old Jeopardy theme.
But yeah, gone, he died.
That's pretty sad, man.
But he went out as a true Canadian, didn't he?
Playing hockey with his son.
Yeah, and I hear like...
Was it on the ice that he was playing or road hockey?
Ice.
Ice hockey? Okay.
But here's the thing.
So he goes down on the ice, but then he gets up and he gives a thumbs up.
Like he's alert on the ice.
He's alert and he's joking with his son about like, hey, take pictures for Instagram or whatever.
Like he's fully alert and like he's feeling better on the ice.
And they take him to the hospital and then he has a second episode in the hospital, which is the fatal blow.
Right.
So he actually like, it's not like, he's not like the, because I know guys in their 40s who play.
I know a guy, he was working on my old house.
He was working, plastering my ceiling and he who play ice hockey. I know a guy. He was working at my old house. He was working,
plastering my ceiling,
and he went to play hockey.
He was in his 40s,
and he dropped dead,
and it was instant.
Really?
The heart was going up.
And my uncle at 58,
he just got up in the middle of the night
not feeling well
and went down,
and he was done.
But Alan Thicke,
he went down on the ice,
and then he had a period
where he recovered,
and he was alert
and talking and joking.
Crazy. Then he had a second episode. Yeah and he was alert and talking and joking.
Crazy.
And then he had a second episode.
Yeah, man.
That makes me scared.
So the heart thing.
I recently had like a cardiologist explore my heart in great detail.
Most people don't have this.
Have you ever had a cardiologist explore your heart in great detail? No, I've never had a need.
No, no.
And this is because I was having what I always refer, I thought they were heart attacks. Like, I don't know if I told you or somebody else, but I was having these episodes
where at night I felt a pin. It felt like a pin was going in my heart. Okay. So I was having these
and I told my doctor about him and then he set me up with the cardiologist because he wanted to
clear it. It turns out when you're having a heart attack, you don't feel it in your heart. Like you
feel it. It's like your arm goes. Yeah. Like it's like elsewhere or whatever, but what do I know? I've got a pain in my heart. I'm scared. I don't want to get your heart. It's like your arm goes numb or something, right? Yeah, it's like elsewhere or whatever. But what do I know?
I've got a pain in my heart. I'm scared. I don't want to get a heart attack.
So bottom line is, this
cardiologist looks at my heart in great detail.
It's like an echo doppler thing. And I do
a stress test where I'm exercising. I do a lot of
work. So I, in the last
18 months, I've had a cardiologist
look me in the eyes and tell me
my heart is in fantastic shape.
And he's telling me
it's a healthy heart. Everything is as it should be. And I have no concerns. So you had to get a
referral for this, right? Yeah. My doctor sent me to this guy. Yeah. I had to get a referral. So I
went through this whole thing, stress test, ectodop, a whole bunch of stuff. But at the end
of it, a cardiologist is telling me I have, my heart's in good shape. Right. Most people don't
get this like luxury. And I, I, and it turns out, and i know before we recorded i was feeling you like
feeling your shoulders because yeah that was um i'm i'm interested in men's uh chest size is that
like like the shoulder kiss like do you want to know what cup size i am what i've learned is
because my son who's almost 15 has very broad shoulders he's a big boy and his doctor says
he's built like a shit brick house. Is your doctor 90?
No, but he's the
coolest guy, doctor wise, cool guy.
He's built like a brick shit house, he
says. But no one's ever said that about me.
It turns out I have a small chest
cavity and that's what's causing this.
It's called skeletal.
I go to the doctor. Why am I having the pains?
My heart's so good. It's skeletal, man.
And then even my GP who was reviewing this stuff with me recently, said, I don't want
you to worry about that heart pain ever again.
Don't give it a second thought.
It's structural stuff.
It's like something to do with my chest.
Interesting.
Yeah, but it's not like a dangerous thing.
That's weird.
Yeah, it's weird, right?
I've never heard of that before.
I know.
But I guess, so whenever I hear somebody who just like alan thick obviously a
rich guy he's crazy healthy guy he's playing hockey at like 60 or whatever he was he was 69
or something 69 was he that old yeah something like that in his 60s yeah 69 maybe but he was uh
and i had you know i had spent a whole day with alan thick have i ever told you that story
spent an entire day with yeah so wait this is is like five years and a few months ago.
I was at,
like,
I happened to be involved in a company
that was working
with Alan Thicke
and I was in the room
when Alan Thicke
was filming a bunch of videos.
This is in Etobicoke.
Oh, wow, cool.
Yeah.
Videos of what?
For what?
Like, promoting this product,
which I'll tell you about
after we finish.
He became a massive pitch man.
Yeah, right.
So, it's related to that.
So, it's all related to that.
So, I'm in the room with him.
And I didn't bug him too much.
But I did talk to him a bit about his theme song compositions.
And he was talking about his son, Robin, was having great success.
Even though this is before Blurred Lines, which was, I guess, his big breakthrough.
But he was having success on R&B charts and stuff.
So he was extremely proud of his son.
He was talking about cooking recipes he was going to try and swapping recipes with some of the other people.
So I had a day with Alan Thicke, and he was a classy guy,
and he was a nice guy.
So Alan Thicke is dead, and I'm sorry to hear that.
Let's talk about the survey real quick here.
So since you were last here, I put out a survey to listeners of Toronto Mic.
I asked a bunch of questions.
Did you see the questions?
I did.
I took the survey.
Twice.
Yeah, you did.
Twice?
Once.
You're the one who said Elvis was the best guest.
Is that right?
But yeah, my daughter did it once, too, I noticed.
Your daughter's answers were quite good.
She skewed.
But you know what?
The results make a pie chart.
No, it's fine.
But it makes a pie chart.
You got to look at the big picture, man.
My daughter picked a bunch of ones, and it skewed my pie chart.
You got to look at macro.
Macro.
Macro.
Come on.
Yeah.
Okay.
So the survey, 189 people filled it in.
See, one person giving you ones isn't going to skew it that much.
I know, but I was like, come on.
Give me fives at least, daughter.
Anyway, the survey was interesting.
11 people out of the 189 I counted yesterday.
So 11 of them put you as their least favorite guest.
So 11 out of 189. That's funny.
In this survey.
That's funny.
I love that.
Is it anybody I know?
Anybody I know?
I have to go.
I can share.
I can't remember.
I got to see.
Some people went anonymous.
Like a lot of people were anonymous.
Right.
Including this.
And I hadn't checked in a little bit because the last few came in recently.
And I saw it yesterday for the first time.
Somebody, in fact, number 189, when I asked for advice for the host,
which is where I got a lot of revealing stuff,
a lot of which I've implemented
and a lot of which I did soul searching on
and realized that's not me or whatever.
But this is the comment I got.
Ready?
Someone of your age should probably analyze your wardrobe.
T-shirts are not the dress of a successful 30 plus person.
That is the advice to the host.
That's hilarious.
I saw you tweet something about that, but I didn't go back and look at the tweet.
So that's funny.
I wonder what this person thinks about Mark Zuckerberg.
But just the whole notion that this is a podcast, right?
Like, I could be naked right now.
Yeah, it doesn't matter.
Or I could be in a tuxedo.
This person clearly doesn't know what people wear on the radio.
No.
Let alone podcasts.
And who?
Like, what do I wear?
Yeah, well.
Now, Mike is wearing, ladies and gentlemen, he did dress up today.
Did I?
Because he's wearing a Santa fucking hat.
That's for you, man.
And so, who cares if he's wearing a t-shirt?
The man is fucking festive right now.
That's true. Merry fucking Christmas, everybody.
And as I said to Liz,
super fan Liz, they're lucky
I'm wearing anything at all.
I could be topless and doing this.
I could be blowing you.
That's fine. That could happen.
If it's plus
30 or minus 30 I am recording
usually in a t-shirt
this is my wardrobe
it's a climate controlled area
you can wear
you know
I didn't turn it on
but I actually
I was worried about
Denise Donlan
having to sit in the cold
so I had a
I put a space heater
thing there
oh but not for me
no
not for you
because you're wearing a jacket
you're warm
but yeah
I don't know
I did share some of the results of the survey with you any thoughts on the survey you know what it's not for you. Because you're wearing a jacket. You look warm. But yeah, I don't know. I did share some of the results of the survey with you.
Any thoughts on the survey?
You know what?
It's funny.
I think it's typical of this medium.
I know it's not traditional radio, but it's, you know, you talking to it on a microphone.
And it's a very intimate medium.
And some of the feedback was very interesting to see how much people felt as though this podcast was theirs
in the sense that they were clearly passionate
about some things one way or the other.
And that's a testament to you, Mike,
and the work that you've put into this.
Whether the feedback was positive or negative,
the fact that you got 189 responses
and some of the responses were as passionate as they were,
I think is a good thing.
And 11 people said that they didn't like me, which is, I think it's even funny
that they even thought of me, given how many amazing guests you have.
But then there was also people who said that they liked me.
And of course, there were a couple of those.
Of course, you don't look those up and quote that number.
But you were one of the divisive guys that appeared in both.
In fact, including your replacement, Mark Weisblatt from 1236.
He shows up in both lists as well.
I think you guys are just like,
either you want only celebrities,
because let's face it, you're not a celebrity.
Correct.
In my own mind.
You're no Denise Duncan.
No, I'm not.
Or Bob Elliott.
He might be in Adam's style, as you're close.
But okay, so you come in here,
and you're clearly here to shoot the shit with me.
And we just riff.
Yeah.
We're riffing.
Some people don't want that.
But then again, I always say, just skip the episodes.
That's right.
If you don't like baseball, skip the two hours of Bob Elliott.
People get really into it, which is good.
And some of the feedback was just, it doesn't make sense.
And then there was clearly some unhappy, shall I say, I'll say it, not you, Mike,
jealous radio people that commented and said that, you know, you should stop or this
is a shitty podcast or you're not doing this or that right. And, you know, at the end of the day,
from my perspective, you're doing this for fun. This has always been something you don't get paid
to do this. No. Right. This is something that's fun. You do it because you like it and fuck them
and keep doing what you're doing because I think you're doing a great job. That's why I come on.
Because it's fun and
I like to support my friend, too.
Thank you. Thank you. And
thank you. I do have a couple of sponsors who
have helped me recoup the costs of
these wonderful microphones. Denise
Donlan sat down. Her first words before we
recorded was, these are great microphones.
People think I'm going to have some USB thing
on the table of my laptop.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, Stokely, of course,
it helped you out a lot.
These are here because of the great audio guru,
Andrew Stokely.
Who I met.
Where'd you meet him?
So he was helping,
he was working on the,
did I ever tell you this story?
Remind me, maybe. He was working on the... Did I ever tell you this story? Remind me, maybe. He was working on the...
I think it was the Briar, maybe,
or the...
What's the women's curling championship called?
Tournament of Hearts.
Tournament of Hearts.
It was in Oshawa.
Oh!
At the GM Center,
what is now the Tribute Community Center.
And he was filming there, and I drove by
and went into his truck, said hello.
Well, okay.
You saw where the magic happens.
I reminded him that, hey, I'm just busting your balls.
Like, I really, you know, clearly you're a good audio person.
He's got a good life.
Can I tell you this?
He's got a good life.
When he's not doing the Blue Jay games at the Dome
or the curling events, he's on tropical islands and stuff.
Or he goes to Disney World all the time.
He's got a good life.
His wife is a mucky muck at Ford Canada.
A mucky muck.
I think he's doing very well.
Audio Guru, I think he does the curling stuff just to keep him busy.
Yeah, well, hey, it's certainly he's in the right country to do that sport. That's for sure. Absolutely. No, if you just do curling. Oh, he does baseball. He's got to get him busy. Yeah, well, hey, it's certainly, he's in the right country to do that sport.
That's for sure.
Absolutely, no.
If you just do curling, oh, he does baseball.
He's got to get into hockey.
That's where you got to go.
But yeah, he's doing well.
Great Stokely story.
Love that guy.
What was I going to say about the survey?
Oh, yeah, one thing I need to talk to you about.
This is going to segue into your rant, I think.
But okay, so some people did not like the fact
I spoke about something in front of the Chris Zeljkovic episode.
So Chris Zeljkovic comes in.
But here's how my structure works.
You see I have notes.
Here's how my structure works.
This is how it works.
I'd read that intro.
You know, welcome to Toronto Mike.
I do that part.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Then I have a part
where sometimes it's like topical,
like time-sensitive stuff.
Like, oh, Trump just got elected.
Or, oh, Edwin just... Oh, we haven't talked about Edwin yet. Edwin just signed with Cleveland. Or sometimes it's like topical, like time-sensitive stuff. Like, oh, Trump just got elected. Or, oh, Edwin just signed with Cleveland.
Or sometimes it's a story about how I met Denise Donlan.
It's like, oh, we met at that much music reunion.
And I tackled you when I looked like a homeless guy.
Whatever.
So there's a part there.
And then sometimes I'll update the listeners on something that might not be related to the guest.
So there's a part there that sometimes it's me telling stories.
And then I do the sponsor mentions.
And then it's all about the guest.
Post-sponsor mention, which is as close to the beginning as possible.
This episode excluded.
Post-sponsor mention, I really do make it all about the guest.
No more Mike stories unless it's related to the guest or whatever.
And I try to go an hour or longer about the guest. Okay? This is how I structure the episodes. And I about the guest. No more Mike stories unless it's related to the guest or whatever. And I try to go an hour or longer about the guest.
Okay?
This is how I structure
the episodes.
And I like the structure
and it's been working
for 208 episodes or whatever.
Some people want me
to lose that opening part
and just about the guest
from the get-go.
This is some feedback.
I can't remember the numbers.
Yep.
Okay, now let me hear
your thoughts as a person
who heard three whole episodes.
Well, I think it can be, sometimes it can be awkward when the guest clearly, now, I
mean, you can make an argument that Chris Zeljkovic was somewhat interested in the-
It was sports related.
In the electric circus thing.
But I also think that Chris Zeljkovic is a really fucking nice guy and wasn't going to
say anything one way or the other.
Zeljkovic is a really fucking nice guy and wasn't going to say anything
one way or the other.
I think there is a, you know,
again, you can do it any fucking way you want,
but if you're going to have a big
intro thing like that, you either have to
make sure that the guest is interested, or maybe
you do it as a separate recording,
you know, like, you record it without
the guest there. I don't know what the right
answer is. I mean, you're right, it has been working
for this long. But if I'm going to, let's say I'm going to ā because somebody did leave a comment where, like, that beginning part is, like, my ongoing conversation with the listener.
And I always do it off the top.
So, like, before I deep dive with the guest, I try to carve that ā if I'm going to do ā like, I know what you're about to rant at me for.
This guy.
Okay?
And I know it's coming, and I'm ready for it.
rant on me for this guy okay and i know it's coming and i'm ready for it but uh if i'm going to share this story post dwight drummond episode and it happened to be chris delcovich it could
have been anybody with chris delcovich and i wanted to update the listeners on this story
because i find it fascinating but we'll get to that i'm gonna carve out a bit of top and do it
and then we'll be all about chris after sponsor mentions. That's how I feel it works, but some people don't like that.
I'm generally okay with it.
I haven't noticed it to be jarring except for the Chris Zeljkovic episode.
And here's why.
Tell me.
One, it was 12 minutes long.
Because you're not alone.
It was 12 minutes long.
In between 10 and 12, I looked at my, I didn't time it exactly, but I looked at my phone.
So it was 10 and 12 minutes long about a subject that was fucking horrible.
Well, that's both
let me come back
I'll let you finish
you finish your rant
and then allow me a chance
to retort
so I think maybe that's where
and the funny part is though
is that that
quote unquote criticism
came before the
Chris Zellkvich episode
so I don't necessarily
have a huge problem with
you talking
no no no
that criticism is all about
was mainly about
but the survey came
well after the
oh did it?
Oh, okay, yeah, because I'm not listening in order.
So, yeah, that...
Listen.
In fact, that's the reference.
When people complain about my opening part,
some people do.
Some people love it, but some people complain about it.
The complaints are primarily,
they point to the Zilkowicz episode, just like you.
That's the one I think that some people found it jarring
because it was 10 minutes on a subject that the host is fascinated by and believes to be legit.
Now, we'll get to this defense.
I know you're not finished yet, but I believe that story to be legitimately interesting.
And I've only shared it long form in one episode, which is Chris Elkovich, and referenced briefly in a two hour conversation with
Bob Elliott,
because we were talking about blue Jays and Canada baseball.
And I briefly mentioned it in Bob Elliott.
So you've,
it just so happened.
You've heard three episodes and all three of them fucking talked,
right?
But that's a weird coincidence.
I've had 208 episodes and those are the only three.
I've listened to other ones.
I've listened to other ones.
Okay.
But I don't like,
it's not like every,
when I had Chris Stephanie,
well,
listen,
most episodes do not actually talk about Dalton Pompey.
But can I tell you why this story is important?
Can I talk?
Okay, go.
Here's, here's, and then you can talk, of course.
It's your fucking podcast.
Touch your head when I can talk.
Here's the deal.
You can talk, I just said, you can talk about whatever you want.
It's your podcast, right?
Who am I to say anything other than you ask me my opinion and i'm also your friend so i'm going to give you
my opinion i want your opinion my opinion is is that this is a non-story but this is also
very much who you are you get excited about things that i don't get excited about and i'm sure vice
versa right i'm waiting for you to take your head. But this particular quote unquote story
to me isn't a story really.
Tell me why it's not a story.
Tell me why it's not a story.
Some guy's dad
was a dancer on Electric Circus
who wore a cowboy hat.
And that guy's son
now happens to be
a part-time Blue Jays player.
That's it.
Yeah.
That's it.
If Monica Deol suddenly became a Toronto Blue Jay,
that's a story, right?
If Dwight Drummond being in a Maestro Fresh West video,
that's a story.
As much of a story as not.
Yeah, that's right.
Two of them dropped the needle as well.
That's an interesting factoid.
It's a fun fact, as you say,
but it's also something that's cool.
You have the guest in,
you can talk to him about it,
blah, blah, blah.
That's great.
But the fact that Dalton Pompei's dad
was the dancing cowboy on Electro Circus,
to me, isn't something that deserves a Pulitzer.
To me, it's not exciting.
I'm not understanding why it needs to come up
three times in a podcast.
It's lost on me. I'm waiting for you to touch your head. It's lost on me. I'm waiting for you to touch your head. I'm not understanding why it needs to come up three times in a podcast. It's lost on me.
I'm waiting for you to touch your head.
It's lost on me.
I'm waiting for you to touch your head.
I'm done.
Okay.
There's no real rant.
All right.
Let me just say this, okay?
This all came from the Dwight Drummond episode.
Correct.
So this didn't exist until the Dwight Drummond.
And he offhand makes one remark.
Right.
That post-episode, I now do some work post episode i can't imagine
the amount of hours he wasted on lots of time well that that single came out of it too but that was
just the icing on the wonderful cake so the story to me is that dalton pompey toronto blue jay forget
this part-time nonsense okay it's fine yeah i know he's in buffalo a lot of the time i'm hoping he
makes the club because we have no field problem this is a big fucking problem he's 24 now let's
give him a go either he's here he's not. Okay, so let's call him
Toronto Blue Jay
Dalton Pompei.
Local boy, too, of course.
So Dalton Pompei,
Toronto Blue Jay
Dalton Pompei,
his father is not just
a dancer from
Electric Circus.
He's the most memorable
dancer from the late 80s,
early 90s
on Electric Circus
that was coincidentally
brought up by
Maestro Fresh West
when he only mentioned one dancer from those days of Electric Circus that was coincidentally brought up by Maestro Fresh West.
He only mentioned one dancer from those days of Electric Circus.
He talked about this crazy, he called him Dukes of Hazzard meets Soul Train, this cowboy guy.
So this cowboy dancer who's been referenced by Dwight Drummond and Maestro Fresh West from those early days of Electric Circus, which is kind of a neat, nostalgic Toronto thing, Electric Circus, okay?
This cowboy dancer, he's the father of a neat, nostalgic Toronto thing, electric circus, okay? This cowboy dancer,
he's the father of a Toronto Blue Jay.
This is now, to me, an amazing story
because it's confirmed with Dalton.
Then after the story has already excited me,
now I find out he put out a single in 1992
called Summertime, Summertime
with Debbie Cox before Debbie Cox was famous.
Wow, can I get this single? Some guy who has every house single released in the history of time has it rips it to MP3, sends it to me. I share it on the blog. I just played it summertime, summertime. Holy smokes. That's Henrik Pompeii, the cowboy dancer from electric circus, Dalton Pompeii, Blue Jay Dalton Pompeii's father.
Dalton Pompey, Blue Jay Dalton Pompey's father.
100% this is a story. If you have no interest in Electric Circus and no interest in the Toronto Blue Jays,
maybe you're underwhelmed by the story.
But if you have any interest in either of those two things,
you're probably very excited, as I know from Reddit and Drunk Jays fans
and other people who told me this is the story of the year.
It's a great story, okay?
I have to share that with the podcast audience post-Dwight Drummond,
which happened to be Chris Zeljkovic. So yes, 10 minutes for that story, play the single, update everybody. I hoped
in my heart Chris Zeljkovic would be more excited about it than he was. Part of the problem is
Zeljkovic didn't seem excited by the story. Like, you're not excited by the story. I had the bad
timing, fine, but I had to share off the top that story. Then, of course,
it comes up naturally. It needs to be referenced in the Bob Elliott two-hour deep dive. Holy smokes,
I took a whole two minutes out of his two hours to share a bit of the story, which he seemed mildly
amused by because he's a big Canada baseball guy who's rooting hard for Dalton because he's
passionate about Canada baseball. So that's it, and now we're ranting about everything. That's
why it's coming up now.
But it's not going to come up again unless Dalton comes on.
And I'm working on that.
I'm working on Dalton Pompei coming over.
And we will, in that episode, of course, discuss his father's electric circus past.
And that single summertime, summertime.
I'm touching my head.
I'm done.
All right.
So I believe it to be a big story and you don't.
And that's just our disagreement.
But that's where I pull my trump card out, which is Toronto Mike gets to make the call.
That's a big story.
You can do whatever you want.
Story of 2016.
You can do whatever you want.
And 1236 put it in their newsletter.
And you can be wrong about anything that you want to.
Did you know 1236?
I did.
I did.
It was fucking ridiculous.
I think it's a great story.
By the way, on the Blue Jay note, Edwin's gone.
Great story.
I believe it to be a fantastic story.
Great. Fantastic. Has everything.
Somebody tweeted at me, it's peak Toronto
because how do you get a Blue Jay and Electric
Circus to somehow come together?
That's how you do it. This is my favorite Christmas
song. I fucking hate, despise
Christmas with every soul
being of my body.
I've been hearing a lot. I've been playing
with an app. Let me play it a bit. I think you played it last year too. Maybe I've been hearing a lot. I've been playing with an app.
Let me play it a bit.
I think you played it last year too, this song.
Maybe I know it's your favorite and I care about you.
Can you sing with me?
I want to blow you over this song.
So great.
You're the only, by the way, that's the other thing.
A lot of people don't like your potty mouth.
Yeah, I saw that.
But you know what's funny?
For those people who...
My name isn't really Elvis,
but for people who know me in real life,
I curse.
I curse in real life.
But they noticed that non-Elvis episodes...
There's no cursing.
It's only used to punch a point.
Correct.
You know what I mean?
It doesn't get used gratuitously.
Correct.
But there's studies out there that say people who curse are highly intelligent. You know what I mean? It doesn't get used gratuitously. Correct. Right. But there's studies out
there that say people
who curse are highly
intelligent.
You're cherry picking
though because I saw a
study that said people
who curse are stupid.
No, I'm just kidding.
No such study.
I'm going to do a study.
I fucking love this
song so much.
What do you love about
it?
It's fucking wham.
It's wham.
Make It Big was a
great album.
I had the cassette.
I was not a wham fan
when I was younger, but I am now. See, I'm the cassette. I was not a Wham! fan when I was younger, but I am now.
See, I'm the opposite.
I was a big...
When Make It Big came out, and I'm a bit older than you, like two years, I guess.
But I had Make It Big or cassette, and I thought it was great because it had not only Wake Me Up Before You Go Go, but it had Freedom.
Yes, yeah, that was good.
Yeah, yeah.
Freedom 90 is good, too.
Where he did it.
But that's solo.
Yeah, yeah. That's with the models. Yeah, yeah. That's is good, too. Where he did it. But that solo. Yeah, yeah.
That's with the models.
Yeah, yeah.
That's when he stopped appearing in his videos.
That's right.
I like the Faith album.
Faith is a fucking great album.
Every single is like, every song is like a single.
Yeah.
Like, even, I could do them all.
But even that father figure is like an epic little thing.
And then what album is I Want Your Sex On?
That's on.
Is that a Faith as well?
Part one and part two.
I think there's like two of them.
Yeah, there's two parts.
I remember when that came out, that was like scandalous.
Because he had that hot Asian chick in there
back when we thought he was bisexual
before we realized.
You know what's funny?
Many great artists who were bisexual,
they weren't really bisexual.
If you go back and look at his videos
and Queen's videos,
you're like, how did we not know?
Or Elton John's and other ones.
Correct.
Not that you can tell when you look at someone, clearly.
No, no, no, no, no.
But there are clearly, now that you know.
You're flamboyant.
Yes.
Yeah.
Like Liberace.
Remember, we're old enough that we remember Liberace being a living person.
Absolutely. And it was, I remember my mother being like, well, he has girlfriends.
Because he always was with women, right?
Yeah, yeah.
He was almost like, and then post-fact, it's like, of course he was gay.
He was nailing his, like, assistant or something, right?
Like, his assistant was his boyfriend, basically.
Those are back, like, today, he'd just be out and happy.
But, like, back then, he had to be all closeted.
It's got to be horrible life, you know?
To be closeted?
It would really suck.
Ask Rock Hudson, man.
I know, yeah.
Or even the father on Brady Bunch.
Wasn't he, wasn't he, or maybe he was, just to his friends, he was out.
I don't know.
We should probably not out people on the air, though.
No, he's outed himself.
Oh, has he?
The father on Brady Bunch.
The mother, and by the way, when you run down the list of dead people in 2016, it's very
male, very male heavy. And horrible people, although the list of dead people in 2016, it's very male heavy.
And horrible people, although the mother of the Brady Bunch.
That's where I'm going.
Horrible.
But she was like 82.
A horrible year for losing people.
Let's name a few, though.
Just a bad year in general.
So Prince was way too young, way too soon.
Prince.
You know, and Prince, I think I was here last time and talked about it.
It's the, I think the only celebrity death where I was fucked up over it, which is weird.
Leonard Cohen didn't fuck you up?
No, I was sad.
I mean, he's one of Canada's greatest poets.
But you knew he was kind of on the end of it.
Correct.
He lived a full life, and it's not a huge surprise, necessarily, that he passed away.
It's sad, but...
This is one of my favorite Christmas songs, by the way.
It's James Brown's Santa Claus Goes Straight to the Ghetto.
Nice.
It's a great one.
By the way,
sorry I didn't load any Elvis.
I know he's famous for some Elvis.
Yeah,
he had quite a few Christmas albums.
Blue Christmas.
That's a big one,
right?
Yeah.
I'm going to have a blue Christmas.
What's your favorite Elvis Christmas song?
I don't have one.
I hate Christmas.
I don't have Christmas favorites
other than last Christmas.
Do you really hate it?
Because you have three kids,
right?
And what are the ages again?
Seven, four, and two.
Those are prime Christmas years.
Yeah, big time.
Do the elf on the shelf.
Okay.
We'll do Christmas gifts on Christmas Day.
Yeah.
That's it for me.
They'll wake up Christmas morning.
Correct.
And you'll all go down together so you can see their reaction?
Yes.
Yes, okay.
Because I'm at a point, as you know,
I have a couple of older kids
who haven't believed in a long time.
But now this almost three-year-old,
I guess he's two and a half,
this is his first time he understands
kind of what's going on.
So suddenly it's exciting again.
All of a sudden,
Christmas meant shit for five years,
and now it's like, wow.
So I always think people hate Christmas
because I could take it or leave it normally,
but when the kids are into it and believe,
I love it because it's such a magic
thing, a magical time of year for the
kids. It's a great lesson on
how to become happy and
feel like someone loves
you because they gave you a gift. It's such
a wonderful time of the year. It's
such a great lesson we're teaching our gift. It's such a wonderful time of the year. It's such a great lesson we're
teaching our children. It's so great.
Fantastic case study on how to brainwash
children. He's a little
young. And adults, for that matter.
So let's say
you're a five-year-old. What do you have, a six-year-old?
Seven, four, and two.
Let's take the four-year-old, okay?
Very cute. I remember these children. They once paid
a visit to my home. They did.
And Michelle had a good time with them, too.
So, who by the way?
They came here for a podcast.
Two of them came here for a podcast.
Oh, yeah.
They were watching with Jervis.
Yeah.
So, the four-year-old fully believes.
Absolutely.
Parents, turn this down if the kids are with you, but I'm going to be very careful here.
Don't worry, actually.
I'll talk in code.
But they fully believe.
There's a story.
There is no question.
He is a real person.
Blindly believe, yes.
He is going to come.
The reindeers are going to eat the reindeer food.
Right.
And Rudolph is leading the charge with a glowing nose.
Absolutely.
And the elves are making the toys.
The Hatchimal from Walmart was made by elves in the North Pole.
Absolutely.
Full on believes.
Seven-year-old wants to still believe.
Seven usually believes, though.
Probably does 75% of it, but there is a little bit of it.
That's because she's smart.
She is very smart.
That's fine.
The typical seven-year-old still, I think, buys in.
I'm trying to remember when it all falls apart, but it all depends.
The oldest usually lingers longer.
I think the oldest has only got a couple years left.
And I feel like I'm going to have a conversation with her.
You're right.
Michelle was done at eight.
You're right, because she was the second. You're right. I'm going to have a conversation with her. You're right. Michelle was done at eight. You're right, because she was the second.
I'm going to have a conversation with her in a couple years, I bet.
I remember those conversations.
About not ruining it further.
Yes, I remember this with James.
So this is a great case.
You basically pound it into their head when they're young,
and they don't question it.
And those same people who have other stories pounded into their head
as they grow up are unable to even consider the possibility that that's not true.
And we meet these people every day.
Every day you'll meet somebody who will tell you about the Savior, Son of God, died for our sins and rose from the dead and will rise again and is looking at us right now.
And we can talk to him, pray to him,
and he will protect you.
Maybe he'll reduce the tumor with his fingers.
He'll reach down and reduce the tumor
and all these things, and they believe it.
And these people, these otherwise seemingly intelligent people,
believe it 100%, and don't even question this whole story.
It's remarkable.
But we meet these people every day, and they think we're the crazy ones.
They think we're the problem.
I mean, we're the ones that are like, what's wrong with you?
How can you not believe?
I mean, you can believe whatever you want.
But I also have the opportunity to judge you for what you believe,
just like you have the opportunity to judge me.
But do you, okay, other than maybe close family members and close friends,
to their face, you don't judge them, right?
That's where I'm at now. I'm trying not to be a dick about it.
I don't have the energy to
worry about what other people are thinking.
There might be some believers listening. Do you want to judge them
now for the festival?
Hearing of grievances.
It's a big problem.
But you can believe whatever you want.
It's fine.
Just don't let that affect me.
You know, which is, I don't know how much of a problem it is here,
but it certainly seems to be becoming a bigger problem in the United States.
People believe in something or believe in something that,
that so much that they want to make everyone adhere to their quote-unquote rules
versus the universal rule of, you know, let people do what they want to do as long as they're not hurting someone.
Well, treat others the way you want to be treated, which is like in one sentence what I pound into my kids.
I'm brainwashing my kids with that.
Right, and that comes fromāactually, I don't think that's ever mentioned in the Bible, is it?
No, no, no. That's too sensible for the Bible.
But it's a message thatāI can't remember even where in the Bible, is it? No, no, no. That's too sensible for the Bible.
But it's a message that I can't remember even where that comes from.
But it comes from Jesus.
But I don't know if it's in the Bible or not. The Jesus stories are actually so different from the judgmental Christianity that we see day to day.
It seems like the Jesus stories, he's washing prostitutes' feet and stuff like that.
It's not just judgmental Christianity. Tell me. He's washing like prostitutes feet and stuff like that. You know what I mean? It's not just judgmental.
Tell me,
who else is it?
Every religion is.
Almost every religion
is judgmental.
Absolutely.
For sure.
Even Buddhists?
They're okay, right?
I don't know if they're
judgmental so much.
They're the best of the bunch
though.
Is that fair to say?
Probably because
they don't give a fuck.
They're working on
inner self.
Zen stuff.
Which I'm all for.
Alright,
so all the religious people listening
are fools
happy festival
how do I get
the 11 people
saying they don't like me
as a guest
you're the unabomber
oh yeah but here's the thing
if they don't like me
they're not listening
so they're not filling
in any survey
like I'm a deal breaker
I said that
somebody criticized
my voice
which I have a complex
about my voice anyways
oh do you
well because yes it's kind of gone after 208 episodes.
And I mentioned this to Denise Donlan.
I grew up loving radio, but knowing that my voice sucked because it didn't sound like Tom Rivers.
I felt it was too, I felt, and I just, the voice is what it is.
You inherit a voice, right?
This is like the Lord gives you what he gives you.
So this is my natural voice, what you're hearing right now.
But I always thought it was too high-pitched for a man.
Well, back in the day, if you were to go to broadcasting school,
you would have put on your radio voice.
I don't have one.
I know, but you would have learned one.
Can you do one?
You did broadcasting.
I'm not doing one.
Because this is what I have.
You want to hear what I got?
I have.
When I read the news, I used to put on a voice, which was ridiculous.
The reporter voice.
Right.
See, to me, it's hard to do that.
Yeah.
You'd put it totally.
And in the news today in Kuala Lumpur, we have a.
Kuala Lumpur.
Kuala.
That's because the bee, the bumblebee going to Simpsons.
Oh, yes.
In the Simpsons.
When he steps in as an anchor.
That's right.
And his voice is suddenly like anchorish.
And he's Spanish.
Right.
Oh, yes. Come on. Oh, caramba. That's right. His voice is suddenly like anchorish. And he's Spanish. Right. Oh, yes, come on.
Oh, caramba.
That's right.
Oh, I watched Narcos.
Great fucking show, huh?
Speaking of Spanish, I think I learned a bit of Spanish.
I can assure you.
It's a great show.
I love that show.
Did you watch Westworld?
No.
You know why?
You know why?
I have a login for Netflix.
So I watched The Crown and I watched Narcos.
Loved both of them.
I loved it.
Honestly, such good shit. Like you're of them. I loved it. Honestly,
such good shit.
Like you're missing out.
Yeah,
but all because
you're anti-monarchist
doesn't like...
I have no interest in it.
You're pro-narcos?
Like what do you mean?
You're all in favor
of the Coke dealers?
Absolutely.
You just don't like the monarchy?
I'm in favor of Coke dealers.
But this is a movie
you should watch The Crown
because it's quality.
It's good acting
and it's good...
You got to see this
Winston Churchill
performance by
Ricky Lake.
No!
She's still alive, right? She is still alive, I think.
Remember she came back for her second
show?
She came back for her second run in her
talk show, but it only lasted a...
Maury Povich is Winston Churchill.
Is he still married to Connie Chung?
He is, yeah.
And his son-in-law is someone famous.
I can't remember.
I remember Morden Downey Jr.
Do you remember this guy?
He's dead.
He died in the 90s.
He died.
He was big though.
He was big time.
Remember he would come on and smoke?
He invented this whole Jerry Springer type deal.
Smoke and drink on the air.
Yeah.
It's funny.
I don't even remember where I was or whatever.
Winston Churchill.
Who plays Winston Churchill?
Great actor.
Legendary actor.
The guy from Harry and the Hendersons.
What's that fucker's name?
Harry and the Hendersons.
What's his name?
Anthony Hopkins is in Westworld.
Is he still alive?
Okay.
Let me tell you.
I said where I'm going with that.
That's where I'm going.
I have a login for Netflix. Westworld's not on Netflix. No. Right. So Westworld is in Westworld. Is he still alive? Okay, let me tell you. I said where I'm going with that. That's where I'm going. So I have a login for Netflix.
Westworld's not on Netflix.
No, right.
So Westworld is HBO.
Correct.
I don't get the TMN stuff.
That's a layer I don't go to on my cable system.
So the only way I'm going to see an HBO show is if I visit some bay, some pirate bay and get a torrent.
Like I don't have a legal way to watch an HBO show.
I have a Cody box.
Explain. You don't have a legal way to watch an HBO show. I have a Cody box. Explain.
You don't know,
Cody,
it's,
it's,
you know,
those,
you know,
those Android boxes
where you can,
so it's,
it's like that.
But is that,
is that,
first of all,
A,
is it legal?
Not that I'm like
judging that or,
There was an article
in the paper
a couple of weeks ago
or something
where it's gray.
Or maybe it is illegal,
I don't know.
It sounds illegal, but not that I'm judging.
There's millions of these boxes out there.
It's easy to do?
Super easy.
I can do it.
Because there are HBO shows I'd love to watch.
I bought the box on Amazon, plugged it into my TV,
and Bob's your uncle.
I wish that...
I can watch live sports on it, too.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah!
Yeah!
But I also have an HD antenna
so I get a lot of
live sports that way.
Plus I also subscribe
to Sportsnet now.
But then you miss out
on all those
TSN Raptor games
and TFC matches
are on TSN.
I get that
on my box.
Okay.
Alright, you're the man.
What the fuck is this?
My favorite Christmas
song of all time.
The Pogues.
Alright.
You don't know this song? No. I don't believe you. It's a Christmas song. Why time? The Pogues. All right. You don't know this song?
No.
I don't believe you.
It's a Christmas song.
Why would I know it?
Because it's The Pogues.
Hold on, let me hear a bit.
Every year I pronounce this
my favorite Christmas song of all.
I'm surprised you don't know it.
I don't remember it at all.
Are you going to miss Edwin Encarnacion?
Well, we can all be happy and confident that we won the negotiation, people.
Woo!
You know, that's the thing.
Way to go.
I see a lot of, like, Wilner and a lot of others are saying, like, well, we made him a good offer.
He said no, so we moved on.
This was a thing.
As if it's like that's the game. Well, so we moved on. This was a thing. As if
it's like, that's the game.
Well, you won the negotiation. That's what happened.
As Bob Elliott said, when the writing
was on the wall, we knew Edwin
was going. We didn't know where he was going or what it was for.
As he said, is your team better
now than it was then? That's a question
the fans would ask. What do we care
about dollars? It's not even a salary cap in this league.
I could give a fuck
if they gave him $100 million
a year. Yeah, because that's
Bob McCowan's argument all the time, too. Unless there is
a salary cap, what the
fuck do... Because that was what, you know,
back in the day when
there was no NHL salary cap, people used to rip
management for giving out all these contracts.
And in the end, unless the
contracts
remove an ability for you to do something else,
which in MLSC's case, it never did
because they just kept signing contract after contract
after contract, who the fuck cares
how much you give these guys?
As a fan, I don't care.
And then people argue, well, the team has a budget.
So it's like a salary, an internal self-imposed...
Well, there is a cap in baseball.
There's a luxury tax.
But the Yankees don't care.
But my point is, I'm not saying you should pay $100 million for Edwin.
I'm saying, okay, yeah, you put your line in the sand,
and I think it was four years, $80 million or something,
he offered.
He said, no, we're going to see what the market bears or whatever.
And then we went and signed Morales, and who's the mofo who's going to play first base?
Some guy's going to platoon with Smoke,
Strikeout King Smoke, by the way.
So how do you like that?
And for all of the above, we moved on,
and now once Morales was signed, I said, Edwin's gone.
That was it.
We're not going to bring them both.
Although, again, Wilner at the time,
and I like Mike Wilner.
You know that.
I'm his biggest fan.
But Mike Wilner at the time, and I looked at the tweets, you know that, I'm like his biggest fan, but Mike Wilner at the time,
and I looked at the tweets
last night,
all because we signed Morales
doesn't mean we're done
with Edwin,
and we're all like,
well, why would you sign both?
And he's like,
well, you can sign both,
and maybe we're still
going to have him.
And then yesterday,
when they did,
when Cleveland announced
that they,
or it was announced
Cleveland had Edwin,
Wilner was on Twitter saying,
well, we gave him
a better offer,
you know, we moved
on because he said no.
But you're right.
This is like if your
goal is like to win the
negotiation.
They won.
We won the negotiation
that we, you know, he
had to take less to play
in Cleveland.
But Cleveland's got
Edwin now and we've got
the crazy platoon with
Smoke and the guy whose
name I can't remember
right now.
What the fuck's his
name?
It's clearly.
What's the guy who's
going to platoon with
Smoke at first?
I don't know. Because Morales is going to DH. I'm not going to Google it either. And the fuck's his name? It's clearly... What's the guy who's going to platoon with Smoke at first? I don't know.
Because Morales is going to DH.
I'm not going to Google it either.
And the outfield, we mentioned Pompeii.
Let's pretend Joey Batts comes back.
Now, no one even likes him in the outfield.
They want him to be like a DH.
Exactly.
Exactly.
There's clearly, clearly a...
There clearly wasn't enough communication
between the agent and the club. and and the and the club because
based on what the agent said they weren't clear where it wasn't clear that that was a final offer
because you know they all they had to say was listen if you don't sign this we're going to go
sign somebody else and and it seems as though the deal could have been done at that point in time
but yeah three years three years uh 20 per and there's an option for the club.
It's a club option for the fourth years, which is a fantastic deal.
You have to imagine that this wouldn't have happened under Anthopolis.
No, I agree with you.
I have a fun fact for you since we're in theā¦
Do it up, and then, yeah.
Since we're in the fact generation business here that no one fucking cares about.
I care.
Your boyfriend.
George Trombolopoulos.
Nope.
Your favorite Toronto Maple Leaf of the last five years.
Oh, David Clarkson.
David Clarkson.
Mimico boy.
Correct.
Love that guy.
Your favorite Maple Leaf now has less goals
in his Maple Leaf career than Austin Matthews.
Yeah.
Can I tell you though?
It's so wonderful.
Number 71 will live on in my heart.
Speaking of bad contracts.
Yeah.
Holy moly.
You were so excited about him and
thought that they had no choice.
It was something that they had to pay
him.
Yeah, but you have a...
Did not have to pay him.
You look at things through a retrospective lens.
No, no, no, I do not.
Wind back the tape,
because I've never ever been a fan of David Clarkson.
I have a natural tendency to,
when life gives you lemons, to make lemonade.
This is a natural thing I do with everything.
And I realize once we sign Clarkson to that contract,
it's not like me not liking it. It could reverse
it or whatever. So I tried to
adapt to the reality to make it as good as possible,
which is to embrace the
upside of David Clarkson. There is no
upside. Well, there was no upside.
You embraced... It was fool's gold.
I was still full of Obama's
hope. You were selling fool's gold,
my friend. And I will never
let you forget it. It was the greatest.
You were the only person in the city.
Because my son won't hear this podcast before Christmas,
guess what he's getting Christmas morning?
A David Clarkson jersey.
A signed David Clarkson jersey.
He signed it on the subway.
He went to the Royal York subway,
and I caught him on the subway, and he signed it.
He's in Columbus now, right?
Yeah, he's in Columbus.
And didn't he lose an entire season because he was hurt? Yeah, something like that.
And then we traded him for a guy who can never play
again. That's how
important it was. You're getting him a Nathan
Horton jersey. Oh, yeah. So for real,
he's waking up Christmas morning. Does he even have a number?
Do you think he has a number somewhere?
Do you think that's part of the league
rules where you have to have a number if you're
on the roster? I'll bet you you don't need a number until you're on the
active roster. I bet you that's the rule.
So I got him, of course, an Austin Matthews
jersey. He is so in love
with this almost 15-year-old
boy is so in love with Austin Matthews and I'm so
happy. He's a beast. Because I only have him half the time.
So I had him last night until
9 p.m. and then I dropped him off
at his mother's and the game
was at 9 o'clock. So we have a
rule. If he's not
with me watching the leaf game every time austin matthews scores uh he calls me this is like the
rule right i i love this rule because it's so many calls does he like uh does he like mitch
marner yes he does yeah london boy he loves miss marner but his favorite is austin matthews and
he even likes kneelander who i know is in in the Babcock doghouse of sorts right now.
It's so weird.
He's missing some, I don't know, intangible or whatever.
Anyway, the future's bright for the Leafs.
The Raptors were Final Four.
TFC was in the Finals.
And the Blue Jays were Final Four.
This is actually a pretty sweet time.
Although the Jays are stepping back, I think.
But let's hope that something happens.
I think it's going to be tough to make the playoffs this year.
But it was a good run.
Hopefully they can, maybe there's some
magic to be had, Michael.
Merry
Christmas. I hate Christmas. I don't think I've ever
called you Michael before. Oh, you know who called me Michael?
Bob Elliott. Yeah, I was like,
whoa, I realized, you know what? I've never heard Greg
Zahn called Gregory before. He's like,
he's referencing, he referenced
Bob McCowan and Greg Zahn as the only two Rogers employees who could, like, bite the hand of teeth. That's right. And he talked about... Zahn Cherry, before. He's like, he's referencing, he referenced Bob McCowan and Greg Zahn as the only two
Rogers employees who could like bite the hand of thieves.
That's right.
And he talked about.
Zahn Cherry, I think.
Robert.
Yeah, Zahn Cherry.
Robert and Gregory.
And for a moment, I'm like, Gregory?
Oh, yeah.
No, you referenced those two in the Dwight Drummond podcast.
He just, I don't know if he talked about Greg Zahn.
He did.
He said Gregory.
Did he?
Okay.
He brings up Gregory before he was even married.
But I don't think he brought it up as the only two people that can make fun of Rogers.
Well, he brought him up as two people who do make fun of Rogers.
And then I said, I think they're the only two.
And then Robert, Bob Elliott said, I think you're right.
Because he couldn't name a third.
I think that's funny that he calls everyone by their full first name and he goes by Bob.
Yes.
Yeah.
And he does it like even though I'm Toronto Mike, which means I'm telling you I want to
be called Mike.
He still calls me Michael.
That's right.
And then he mentioned Wilner a couple of times and he called him Michael.
Michael.
And I mean, I'm sure Wilner wants to be called Mike too because most Mikes want to be Mikes,
not Michael.
Right.
Because it means they're in trouble.
Right.
If they hear the name Michael.
I call my wife by her full name and she doesn't like it because she thinks that it means that
I'm mad at her.
Yes.
Which is not the case.
That's your name.
We're not sleeping together
so I don't have to do that.
You know how you could
change your gender
if you want to identify?
We are allowed
to change our names.
And I can call you
whatever I fucking want to.
I call you fucking Elvis.
I don't even know
your real name.
Every time I hear
your real name
I don't even associate it with you.
You know, I met a guy
who recently started
to work at my work
who didn't know my name.
He only knew it as Elvis because we went to school together.
Yes.
See, that's the thing.
There's a gap, right?
Because the new people in your life don't know you as your real name.
It's the new people.
That's right.
Although I don't go back that far.
I go back 10.
I go back.
I know exactly because there was porno involved.
I can tell you exactly.
It was 2006.
Still a great story.
Was it 2006?
So we're on the 10-year anniversary.
Wow.
That's why I was at that TFC match in 2007.
That's right.
Yeah.
Anyway.
I'll give you a 10-year blowjob then.
See, you're the only guest who says that.
Happy Festivus to you and yours.
Happy Festivus, Michael.
Good luck.
I look forward to the feats of strength photos tonight.
Stay tuned.
And that brings us to the end of our 209th show.
We can't forget a photo.
Yes, yes, thank you.
I forgot with Denise and I'm pissed off.
I haven't forgotten a photo in a long time and I forgot with Denise Donnelly
because I took an hour 20 for a 30 minute ep.
I wanted to get her out.
Right, right, right.
I forgot.
Fuck.
You can follow me on Twitter.
I'm at Toronto Mike and Elvis is at Oshawa Elvis.
You know what's funny?
When I have my Twitter set up to retweet everything that you tweet.
Yeah.
Oh no,
that I blog.
And then people get that you blog.
Sorry.
And then people retweet my tweets as though it's like the original and they
comment to me about shit that you wrote.
Yeah.
I find it very controversial shit.
I write about summertime,
summertime.
And our friends at Great Lakes Brewery are at Great Lakes Beer and Chef's Plate at Chef's Plate CA.
See you all next week.
Happy Festivus.
Happy Festivus.