Toronto Mike'd: The Official Toronto Mike Podcast - Festivus Ep: Toronto Mike'd #562
Episode Date: December 23, 2019Mike celebrates Festivus with Elvis and they discuss a cornucopia of topics....
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What kind of a man are you?
You're worthless and weak.
You do nothing.
You are nothing.
You sit in here all day and play that sick, repulsive, electric twanger.
I carried an M16 and you, you carry that, that, that guitar.
Who are you?
Where do you come from?
Are you listening to me?
What do you want to do with your life?
What up, man?
Toronto
I'm in Toronto where you want to get the city love Toronto. VK on the beat. Check.
I'm in Toronto where you wanna get the city love.
I'm from Toronto where you wanna get the city love.
I'm a Toronto Mike, wanna get the city love.
My city love me back for my city love.
I'm in Toronto where you wanna get the city love. Welcome to episode 562 of Toronto Miked,
a weekly podcast about anything and everything,
proudly brought to you by
Great Lakes Brewery,
Palma Pasta,
StickerU.com,
Brian Master from KW Realty,
and Banjo Dunk from Whiskey Jack.
I'm Mike from TorontoMic.com
and joining me this week
as we celebrate Festivus
is Elvis.
Welcome Elvis.
I didn't know if it was the real Elvis or me
Is there a difference?
Mike, thank God tonight it's them instead of you
It's the true spirit of Christmas
It really is
Fuck everyone else
Get those presents to show your loved ones how much you actually love them
And thank God the people in this
world who are living without
everything you have, that it's
them and not you.
Merry fucking Christmas.
And
do they know it's Christmas? Like, is this
continent aware
that Christmas
happens on December 25th? Well, the ironic
part is that they do
because there's a shit ton of people
who have gone to Africa to make them Catholic
and prey on the weakness that they have
of trying to find something
to be able to, you know, make it through.
So yeah, they probably do know it's Christmas time.
Yet another reason why that fucking song is stupid.
And this is kind of a callback to last year's Festivus app.
That's right.
We went hard on Bono.
Can you blame the guy?
Bono did say the words, but it's Bob Geldof's fault, right?
They got to blame somebody.
Well, I mean, Bono, I think, has said that he does regret.
Because he could have said no.
He's Bono.
Correct. Correct. He's Bono. Correct.
Correct.
He is Bono.
But I mean,
I think we all live in a world
where sometimes we're just not aware
of the things that we say.
And he,
remember,
the spirit of the whole thing
was a good cause.
So Bono's like,
this is for a good cause.
They raised a shit ton of money.
Right.
I don't even know how much money.
I probably could find out.
But yeah,
a whole lot of money.
Happy Festivus, Elvis. Happy Festivus, Elvis.
Happy Festivus, Mike.
It's for the rest of us.
When was the last time you were in this studio?
I'm thinking, so I've been on,
this is my second time now on in the month of December.
But I think the last time I was on
was just before you redid the studio.
Because I was on Periscope last time.
So I'm going to think maybe,
I definitely made it on once a quarter do you remember the configuration because i didn't there was it was the old configuration it was how it was oh yeah i don't didn't i flip it i don't
remember ever doing a periscope of the original maybe you did have because we were facing the
wall yeah you didn't have it like this i think i can't remember i can't remember. I can't remember. But I've been, so this is, I tried different configurations and then I stuck with this
one since the summer because this is the one where I feel I can look you in the eye and
have a convo.
It is much better that way.
I can still do stuff here.
And meanwhile, the people who want to watch on Periscope.
And you've been able to convert this wall into a sponsor wall, which I'm sure helps
with the dineros.
Correct. been able to convert this wall into a sponsor wall which i'm sure helps with the dineros correct and banjo dunk actually was letting me know he's uh creating a poster that will go right beside the
octopus who wants to fight so uh very good always a pleasure to chat you up it's difficult for you
i mean you've been fantastic with the tmlxs because you were like so dependable i was i think i've only met missed
one haven't i but the ones where you co-hosted you're like batting a thousand oh yes well if
you ask me to co-host and there's a live audience i mean it would be pretty shitty for me not to
show up yeah but when the the company says we need you in singapore oh right yes like what are you
gonna do yeah uh thankfully you know these dates well in advance so i'm able to try and I do my best to plan around them.
But yeah, you're right.
Now that we've jinxed it, I will miss the next 17 TMLXs.
The next TMLX is going to be at StickerU's storefront on Queen Street.
Oh, is this an exclusive announcement?
Well, I've made it already, but I don't have a date yet.
So that will be the big announcement that's coming.
But yeah, I can confirm that TMLX6 is going to be on Queen Street.
So it's like we're moving east towards Oshawa.
Do we know, do you have a date yet?
No.
You're still trying to figure that out?
No date yet.
Gotcha.
But I mean, that's getting closer, right?
Sure.
Bathurst?
Is that where they are, Queen and Bathurst?
Yeah, pretty much.
It's like my old hood.
I used to live um just uh
south of trinity bellwoods park oh you live near el strachan oh no on your strong i did
just one street over from strong actually let's get this out of the way real quick so we don't
dwell on it like we normally do but have you listened to any episodes since you were last
uh physically in this studio no No, I have not.
But I actually plan on listening to some episodes this time,
which I think is different.
Can you tell us which ones you're going to listen to?
I can't remember.
They're on my phone.
Do you like baseball?
I enjoy baseball, yeah.
I can't watch a whole game, though.
It's pretty fucking boring. Okay, don't watch a game, but do yourself a favor.
The last episode of Toronto Bikes, episode 561.
Oh, yeah.
You know what intrigued me about this episode?
This is the episode where you have Bob Elliott
and who else do you have on it?
Dave Perkins.
Dave Perkins, yeah.
And the part that intrigued me about this episode
was that you said you do very little speaking in it.
I tried not to.
I was thinking as a listener, okay?
If I'm a listener and somebody puts together, because I
consider myself, I played God on this one,
man. I made
this happen. These aren't two people who hang
out a lot. But are they friendly together?
Yeah, they're friendly. With each other? Okay.
There's no rivalry or feud.
I had that incident with Hebsey.
Oh, we have to talk about that in a minute. I had an
incident with Hebsey and Leo Roudens,
for example. Oh, you did? How about that in a minute. I had an incident with Hebsey and Leo Roudens, for example.
Oh, you did?
How were they possibly in a feud?
Because when Leo coached
the Canadian national team,
Oh, Hebsey had some things to say.
Hebsey on CHCH did a thing
about how he was,
as a coach,
he's an excellent analyst
or something about how
he's not qualified,
no experience,
and is an excellent analyst,
but not an excellent coach.
Oh, wow.
And Leo caught this and took a note on it.
And according to Leo, and this is an exclusive,
I've never put this in public,
but Leo told me he reached out to Hebsey
to see if he could come on the show on CHH to respond.
Right.
Right?
And I guess Hebsey was doing the show with Bubba O'Neill,
and they decided it
didn't fit the format so they said no and leo a remembers this and when leo passed hebsey in my
hallways this is the day after the double overtime win against the bucks right what a big win that
was uh you i mean you should have been there they wouldn't look at each other but they both their
personality sort of changed a bit like they were amazing because i think hebsey knew he might bump into leo i warned him but leo had no
idea he might bump into hebsey in my house which is fantastic back and in on this note well so yeah
so i had to check in so basically how it went is i reached out first to perkins and said hey
are you friendly with bob elliott and perk said, yeah, Bob's a good guy.
And then I went to Bob and I said,
hey, would you record with Perkins?
And Bob said, yeah, I could record with Perkins.
Then I went back to Perkins and said,
hey, would you record with Bob Elliott?
And he goes, yeah, we could mumble together for a while.
And then I just got, I found a time in their calendars
when they could both be here and the rest is history.
And I was thinking as a listener, like if somebody said, here's Dave Perkins, Bob Elliot
for a couple hours, like what you don't want is it to be like divided, like one third Toronto
Mike, one third Dave Perkins.
And I was very sensitive to this.
So I had to do a lot of like housekeeping at the beginning, like I'm going to do a view
in a minute, do some sponsor stuff and set the table.
And then I really did like try to shut up i did
ask some questions from listeners but that was like it do you i'm not sure if you ever have
talked about this or if you disclose this or even if you you care do you do you have a sense of what
your mo i'm sure you do but i'm trying to trying to be dramatic here do you have a sense of what
the most downloaded or listened to episode is of Toronto Mike ever in the history of your
prolific show? For a long time, it was the Strombo episode. Right. I haven't actually-
I saw you just reposted the picture of you and him. Well, what I do is-
Wasn't that around Christmas time, right? You quit Facebook, right?
I quit Facebook and Twitter. I only know what you post on Twitter.
Well, you didn't quit Twitter. You just stopped tweeting.
Yeah. I don't log in. The only reason why I know what you post on Twitter. You didn't quit Twitter. You just stopped tweeting. Yeah. I don't,
I don't log in.
The only thing,
the only reason why I know what you post on Twitter is because you have the feed on your
right hand,
the right hand rail of your website.
So I do look at that.
That's how I know what you tweet.
Okay.
So I was looking,
I get a,
uh,
on this day.
Oh yeah.
You want to pop that open?
Yeah.
I do.
I'm so thirsty.
Do it on the mic.
Hold on.
Oh my God.
Oh yes. Okay. So that's a blonde lager from Great Lakes Brewery
yeah oh yeah baby
hit me thank you Great Lakes Brewery
for how many years now
tremendous partnership and
pleased to say they're back for 2020
fucking A you know what those guys
I don't know any of them and I only
know them from your show and drinking
beer. I did know about them before
your show, but drinking beer. But then going to
the brewery and stuff,
what a setup. It's great.
And it seems like it's just such a great partnership.
And since we started the partnership,
they added this really cool event space
indoors. So the patio...
Oh, it's indoors. They have something indoors now.
Yes, they have an indoor event space. So they the patio. Oh, it's indoors. Well, they have, I've never done it. I've never, yes, they have an indoor event space.
Yeah.
So they're, they're doing a bunch of cool events there.
Right.
Because you know, if I wanted.
It's probably the only way that they can really, I mean, no offense, their beer is great, but
you know, they're, they're in a prime location in Toronto.
I can't imagine it's cheap.
And so they, I'm sure these places need to figure out ways in which they can stay in
business.
No, you're right.
So if you're having an event, you can do it there for sure.
I wonder if anyone gets married at a brewery.
I bet you somebody gets married at a brewery.
And if you're going to get married at a brewery,
you're going to do it at an independent craft brewery.
I worked with a woman who got married at Medieval Times.
I'm not even shocked by that.
Full costumes and everything,
and they went down to the arena.
Yeah, I wish I was there.
That would have been one for the.
Do you have any memory of what I was saying before you cracked open the Great Lakes beer there?
We were talking about Bob Elliott.
And so you made it happen.
You were able to get the calendars.
Is that what I was talking about?
Oh, okay.
And then how you were, you exited from the conversation as much as you possibly could.
I feel like I was talking about something else after that,
but it's okay.
It'll come,
whatever it was.
I'm sure it's very important.
Someone I'll tell you.
Okay.
So let's do this here.
Would you mind,
you just came here to record the Festivus Ep of Toronto Mic'd.
Correct.
Right after Hebsey on Sports recorded.
That's right.
In the same studio.
So much like when Leo Roudens and Hebsey crossed paths,
and it was frosty on that victoria
morning victoria day morning i could feel the chill uh you tell us tell us how you encountered
hebsey this morning well i don't know if hebsey would remember me out of context so i i think
that we've met a number of times now so he probably would remember me if i was standing beside you or
in front of you he's seen your picture a hundred times um but you know out on the road i'm not
entirely sure that he would put two and two together but obviously i know who he is because
i mean i've seen him since i was a child so anyway so i pull uh a left a right excuse me to come down
your street to get here and there's a bunch of cars parked on the side of the street as there
always are because there's a little bit of a diagonal parking lot um on the side of the street
right and who literally jumps out from behind one
of these cars full-on running like he's running i i don't know if he was catching a bus or trying
to get probably or something uh catching quite literally jumps right out in front of my car and
uh i almost killed one of your your clients like i i almost i don't have clients that you could
kill one i had to touch the break.
Like,
I mean,
it wasn't like a screeching stop or anything like that,
but I had to like break.
And,
uh,
he,
I think he knew that he probably should have looked because he didn't look at me.
Like there wasn't a glare,
like you motherfucker.
Why did you almost run me over?
I think it was kind of like,
he knew he was at fault.
Yeah.
Uh,
which is fine.
I mean,
like I,
but you didn't hit him.
No,
I did not hit him.
Thankfully,
but it was like, first it was like, shit, there's somebody in front of the car.
I hit the brake and then I was like, oh, fuck, that's Hebsey.
Because I knew he was here because I just texted you saying that I was, you know, getting coffee.
And you were telling me...
Just wrapped up with Hebsey.
That he was finishing up.
So I almost killed him.
That's hilarious.
Sorry, Hebsey.
That's hilarious, though.
That would have really sucked.
Like, if he had died, like, he's a celebrity.
So it would be big news.
We'd all be talking about Hebsey got killed. And then wait till it comes out elvis i have a new car i would have been so upset
but you know what it would have done oh my goodness this because we still would have
recorded right because we probably would have talked about how you feel killing this would
have been like an exclusive this would have been i mean it's still content but it would have this
would be the most downloaded episode in my history because we are it just happened like let's hear elvis talk about killing what i should i like i mean if that really
happened the smart move would have been for me not would be for me not to talk about it i probably
would want a lawyer because i would imagine the cops but you're not smart well how do you feel
swearing because i uh you i asked you and you uh did uh agree to do so that you would not swear at
tmlx five that's right yeah and you didn't swear the only do so that you would not swear at TMLX5.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah.
And you didn't swear.
The only swear word in that whole episode was Peter Gross.
Yeah, that's right.
No, and no, what's his name swore as well?
Perry?
Jesse.
Oh, no.
Gene.
Gene.
Gene.
Jesse was in there.
Gene Valaitis.
Gene Valaitis swore.
Yeah, he did.
I didn't notice that.
Okay.
See, these old radio guys should know better, right?
But okay. So we were at Palma's Kitchen for- Favorite Christmasitis swore. I didn't notice that. Okay. See, these old radio guys should know better, right? But okay.
So we were at Palma's Kitchen for-
Favorite Christmas song right here.
I know.
And I'm bringing it up for a reason because last, we played it because, let me just think.
George Michael.
So George Michael died on Christmas day and then that death caused you to weep.
Yeah.
Right?
I was surprised.
It caught me off guard.
But you say like, you talk like it never happened, but Prince's death made you weep. Yes. Right. I was surprised. It caught me off guard. But you say like,
you talk like it never happened,
but Prince,
Prince's death made you.
Yes.
Yeah.
But I can understand that.
I have a lot of invested in Prince.
But you,
okay.
So we're going to talk about another death in a moment,
but let me first just say,
thank you to Palma's kitchen for hosting Elvis.
Thank you for co-hosting TMLX five.
My pleasure.
Thanks for having me.
Do you want to say anything about,
I'm going to give you a lasagna today, but I loved it. I mean, do you want me to talk about Palmaing TMLX 5. My pleasure. Thanks for having me. Do you want to say anything about... I loved it.
I'm going to give you a lasagna today, but... I loved it.
I mean, do you want me to talk about Palma or TMLX?
Both.
So I love...
I mean, I sent Anthony an email.
So I went to Palma Pasta, had a great time at TMLX.
It was awesome.
I mean, it was...
How long was that fucking broadcast?
Three hours.
Exactly.
It was exhausting.
I felt exhausted afterwards. But it was always going to be three hours. It was good. hours. Exactly. It was exhausting. I felt exhausted afterwards.
But it was always going to be three hours.
It was good.
Yeah, yeah.
It was good.
And my kids were there and they had a great time.
And it's funny.
It still comes up in random conversations.
They'll ask me random questions or, you know, it'll be like, oh, this happened here and there.
Could you share the comment Charlie said to you?
Yeah.
So Charlie just randomly, what did he randomly ask me?
I can't remember.
He asked if, does anthony shave twice
a day yeah so you had made some sort of comment when you were introducing anthony about how he's
a very masculine italian man anthony is and has a very dark um shadow um and so you had made the
joke that he shaves twice a day and so randomly just in the podcast wasn't being talked about nothing just randomly
charlie says does anthony really shave twice a day and i had to ask him who who is anthony like
because but that tells you he's paying attention yeah very much so and so i said no i think that's
a joke i don't think he shaves twice a day although he probably could so i i really enjoyed
it anyway um i don't know if you saw but i bought quite a bit of food that day from Palma Pasta.
How was it?
And I think it was that day or the next day or the day after that, I cooked a bunch of it.
And I asked you for Anthony's email address and I sent him an email and I said, listen, dude, you're doing really good stuff.
You have fed my family exceptionally well this evening,
the quality of your food is off the charts.
And it's surprising in the sense that it's frozen food.
And it is remarkably, I mean, it's delicious.
And so I still have some more left over.
So yeah.
I got another lasagna for you upstairs buddy you're
coming all this way from north australia thank you very much appreciate it but i think i have
i have ravioli left and lasagna left so this will be two and it'll be it's perfect for over the
holidays right you stick it in the oven you know like an hour and a half or whatever it takes to
cook and off you go it's good stuff i laugh inside i won't repeat the
story but i always think about our history together you me and uh yes if i may we have we have uh we
have a fun history you gave me some stickers mike right so i did mention tmlx6 was going to be a
sticker you they uh they said queen and they are they have a storefront at the queen and bathers
they also have a pop-up store in Square One.
Oh, Square One.
Square One, right?
Nice.
Speaking of the 905.
But yeah, I don't know where you're putting your Toronto Mike stickers.
I'm sure you're collecting them.
But there's another one.
I'll give it to the kids.
I have a whole bunch of new ones that arrived today.
And I'm actually going to do this.
If you reach out to me and say you want a sticker,
if I see on the map I can bike to you,
I'm going gonna literally put
it in your mailbox or whatever i'll bike over if you're too far to bike i'm going to spend the big
bucks and slap a stamp on an envelope and mail i'm gonna it's gonna you know this money's coming
out of my own pocket i'm gonna happily mail you a sticker so you know email me at mike at toronto
mike.com or dm me Twitter. I'm at Toronto Mike.
And we'll do this.
I want to get these stickers to as many people as possible.
Very good.
Thank you, sticker you.
So this song made you cry.
Oh, this song.
Did I cry last year to this song?
Was it the last track of your crying? I don't know.
There's been a lot of crying lately.
There is a lot of crying.
We need to ask your brother.
He seems to have a pretty good.
He's worried about you.
Yeah.
Fair enough.
This is good stuff. Have you heard the lead singer of Roxette?
Yes, it made quite a bit of news.
Surprisingly so.
Well, these are big hits.
Yeah, they are.
I'm a big fan of Roxette back in the day.
I was.
Do you want me to tell my crying story here?
Yes, please.
I put it on your blog.
So this song is, I can remember the moment like it was yesterday.
Italy was playing Brazil in the World Cup final.
Went to penalty shootouts.
And this is the infamous goal where Roberto Baggio, or non-goal
excuse me, where Roberto Baggio... The divine pigtail.
That's right. Roberto Baggio
puts the ball over the net, causing
Brazil to win their first World Cup in a very
long time.
And I was devastated.
I can't remember how old I was. I was
a teenager.
Really upset and
went to my room, turned on the radio.
I believe it was 640 at the time, maybe 680,
but probably 640.
Or was it just like a hit?
I can't remember.
I can't remember.
Yeah, they were a top 40 station for a while.
I'm 99% sure it was Tarzan Dan,
and he gets on the radio and says,
this one goes out to all those Italian fans
because it must have been love and then he
hit this song and it was i mean it was just the tears flowed i was so devastated so invested in
that you know as a as a kid i mean we're invested now as adults but i think we have a better
understanding of what it means to win and lose but i was so invested and just broke down i remember
in the room and i was crying like a yeah yeah, like an upset little boy that I was,
but it was a memory that is still with me today.
And, you know, that's, that's, you know, that's a real evidence of how radio has the
opportunity to connect with people, you know, like I, in that moment, Tarzan Dan was speaking
directly to me.
And in that era, there was no other real time.
I mean, I guess there's television.
Television and radio were the only two.
And usually television was not live where radio was always live.
But there was no other real time connectivity really with the masses.
And the psychology around it is that we do believe that in radio,
when you hear someone speaking on the air, that they are speaking to you.
Whereas in television, the psychology is that we don't have that personal connection and we don't imagine someone speaking directly to us.
So that's why radio is unique in that way.
And that's what caused you to become a Western, University of Western radio star.
Yes, H-R.W.
94 point.
What is it now?
Seven.
I think they move
dials.
I've had people on
since your last
appearance who have
were on that station.
Yeah.
Lots of people.
Lots of famous people.
Dan Schulman.
Stephen Brunt.
Do you know a guy
named Jory Middlestad?
Jory Middlestad.
Yeah. He came on. I like Jory. That'sat? Jory Middlestat? Yeah.
He came on and talked about that.
I like Jory.
That's an episode I want to listen to.
Because you speak about...
I mentioned you when...
You speak about Between the Lines on that show, right?
Of course.
I love that show.
And I'm not a gambler, but he just had a really great way of being able to put on a good show.
It's a sign of a good broadcaster.
The content wasn't something that I was really into, but I did look forward to that show. was on sunday mornings i believe they talk about it just oh yeah yeah and it was replaced by
a similar show i think a guy came over with sponsors but now it's george what's his name
and i fucking hate that guy russic yeah i just you know no offense george george if you're listening
i'm not into him i was not into him when he was on with Dean either.
It's just not my cup of tea.
He was on with who?
Dean.
Wasn't he on with Dean?
Dean who?
Dean who?
All right.
Sorry.
I forgot that you're feuding with him.
I'm not feuding with him.
You're feuding with him and Fearless Fred.
I'm not Fearing.
Fearless Fred and I,
oh no,
please don't do that. I guess suppose there is probably bad blood between Blundell and I.
I'm not going to lie,
but you know, I, I didn't listen to that show because, you know, you might have heard he's not my cup of tea.
Have you heard that before?
Is he still doing his podcast?
No idea, but I'm sure he is.
I'm sure he is.
I'm sure he's trying.
I know he was trying to get a gig at 1010.
This was his movie.
Oh, was he?
Oh, yeah.
He was doing like some fill-ins there or something.
Yeah, tryouts.
You know, he's doing tryouts now. I thought he was done with radio, though. That's what he said. But, I he? Oh, yeah. He was doing like some fill-ins there or something. Yeah, tryouts. You know who's doing tryouts now?
I thought he was done with radio, though.
That's what he said.
But I mean, people change their minds.
It's fine.
Our buddy is doing tryouts with 640 right now.
Yeah, Greg Brady, right?
Is he still doing tryouts there?
Yeah.
So we wish Greg Brady luck
because he tries to get a gig on the Chorus Network there.
I think that's where Bobcat's going to end up.
I think he's going to end up with a national show
on the Chorus Network. Oh, you think he's going to go back?
But I don't know. But yeah, for sure.
I'm sure there's some kind of a non-compete
right now because he's being paid for it.
Until whenever his contract is done.
I think he has another year left on that deal.
So it could be a while. But we'll see.
Okay, I'm playing. Because Elvis, since you were last here,
there's a new sponsor. And we love
to celebrate sponsors here. But I'm listening
to TTC Skedaddler
this is by
Whiskey Jack
the Stompin' Tom
jam here
so
Whiskey Jack
present the stories
and songs
of Stompin' Tom
at Zoomer Hall
so everybody
who wants to hear
the stories
and songs
of Stompin' Tom
presented by Whiskey Jack.
My buddy Banjo Dunk is in Whiskey Jack.
This is happening April 16th, 2020,
7.30 p.m. to 9.30 p.m. at Zoomer Hall.
That's, of course, 70 Jefferson Avenue.
So go to whiskeyjackmusic.com to get more detail.
I'm pleased to say in early January,
I'm going to get Banjo Dunk on the show to chat more about all this,
but it's a pleasure being in business with banjo dunk who wrote a lovely blog
entry about me at a whiskey,
Jack music.com.
Awesome.
Okay.
Did you bring any grievances?
I did.
Let's hear some Elvis grievances. I have some too let me get them here okay of course this is you know uh interestingly i uh we have a subscription to
crave and crave has this little subsection that says holiday inspired tv shows or holiday themed
tv shows or something like that and you one of the episodes that is there is the Festivus episode.
So you don't have to go and search for it.
It's fantastic.
And so I rewatched it a few nights ago and still laughed out loud.
Did you see Kevin McDonald in that episode?
Yes,
I did.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's a,
he's kind of the weird,
the weirdo.
Listen to that episode of Toronto Mike.
Cause he was here a couple of weeks ago and he was very good. And so now your mission is to get all the kids in in the studio right exactly four more
to go i love it okay uh so yeah the festivus episode still holds up um always towards the
top of my list every single year as far as grievances goes is the inclusion of radiohead
and pearl jam on lithium radio Radio. I understand why,
but fuck,
I hate both of those bands.
Why radio?
I mean,
why either band?
They're fantastic.
Both bands are excellent.
Why?
Is it because lots of people like them?
No,
not at all.
I don't,
I've never liked those bands.
I don't like those bands.
Because those bands
are very different,
but both,
I would say,
critically acclaimed.
Sure.
Yeah.
And there's no denying it. But both commercially successful yeah absolutely but you don't like either band don't like either one of them and the pearl jam one is the one that makes
me the most angry because uh they have their own fucking station just like play them on if you want
to listen to pearl jam go to the pearl jam station you don't need to invade my lithium i understand
why you
know they're one of the you know they're a pillar of that uh if there was if there was a you know
mount rushmore of grunge they're going to be on there i get that uh but you know it's just me uh
people who take their shoes off on an airplane you're really disgusting yeah you fly a lot you're
really really disgusting i do not like you are you to do all yours or do you want me to interject some?
How many did you bring?
I've got four more.
Okay,
four more.
I'll throw one in there.
Okay.
Bananas,
okay.
Bananas?
Yeah.
I love to have,
and not all mornings are the same.
It's not like I have to have the same morning,
but I do have a typical morning,
a weekday morning,
I should say,
where,
you know,
you wake up at the same time, you get the two little ones ready you bring them to the whatever
their school and their daycare and you come back and you look at the clock it's like 8 a.m and then
i put on a french press coffee i brew up a coffee and then i like to drink my coffee and eat a
banana while i check in with email and twitter basically okay because where you have quit twitter
i've ramped it up.
That's my social media network of choice. So I, this is my routine, my typical morning,
you know, before Hebsey or whatever gets here for recording. So, uh, I love bananas, but you,
the, the frequency at which you have to purchase bananas, because they, they seem to be going from,
uh, green to like overripe in like the span of like 36 hours. Like the window for
a ripe banana is
very small. It's a very frustrating
food because
I find it very frustrating. How do you eat your
banana? I just peel it
and eat it like a monkey. So
do you eat it right off of the thing or do
you rip it off? No, no, right off the thing.
Right. And do you look at someone in the
eye as you're eating a banana? Because that's what I do and I love it. No thing right right off and do you look at someone in the eye as you're eating because that's what i do and i love it no i don't have anyone to look at to be
maybe i should do it on periscope next time i love it it's the only way so uh again i know there are
bigger problems in the world but uh i do wish and i know it's uh it is an engineered food like it's
not like it was naturally like a banana had to be you know, engineered by scientists and stuff at some point.
Like, why can't we figure this out?
So the window of proper ripeness of a banana beet was bigger.
That's all I wish.
Because you have to buy it so frequently.
Do you think it has something to do with the time of the year?
Because the bananas you're buying are on a truck for, you know,
thousands of miles at this time of year?
Who knows?
Who knows?
But, you know, so I find myself every couple of days
biking over to my local No Frills.
Last time I was buying bananas at No Frills,
yesterday night,
they were playing the Biff Naked version
of I Saw Mama Kissing Santa Claus.
Have you heard of this?
Oh, very good, yes.
On Thursday morning,
because, you know, I now produce
the Humble and Fred show.
Are you aware of this?
Right, yeah, I heard that. Okay, so I had, you know, I now produce the Humble and Fred show. Are you aware of this? Right, yeah, I heard that.
Okay, so I had,
you know, Biff Naked
was performing
at the Humble and Fred
Christmas drop-in or whatever,
and I was standing
right behind her
as she did an acapella version
of that song.
Oh, very good.
So there's a little aside.
So go on, bananas,
do another grievance.
I got more.
So I have three in one.
They're all related
to social media,
primarily Instagram,
but I'm sure this happens on twitter as
well but i have a real problem with people who post live video on instagram of concerts yeah
fireworks and weddings no one fucking cares and yeah i i don't understand the story i really instagram story it could be a story it could just
be a video oh yeah you're right it could be anything any video that you post anywhere of
those three things no one wants to see it no one cares about it no one gets the same context that
you're achieving by being there in person and it's just just not a good use of your time okay
so i'm i'm with you on what I get.
It's like my buddy Stu Stone, for example,
goes to a lot of shows.
He'll go to something.
Dumb.
It's not like it's one little snippet.
I don't even mind if it was one little six to ten second snippet
of a big hit from the band you're seeing,
but the multiple I don't get.
Don't bury us in like...
You know what the other thing is?
He's not watching the fucking concert anymore.
Now he's a videographer or a photographer or whatever.
Both.
I hear you.
Come on.
It's like Louis C.K. used to say when we could laugh at his jokes.
He would say, you know.
Suck a bag of dicks.
There's no need to, you know, like when you're.
He would use the example of going to his kid's
Christmas concert and people will be holding up their cameras and be like, it's, it's like
in high definition for real.
When you put the camera down and like, look at it with your own eyes.
Maybe it's for grandma.
The fireworks one is the fireworks and concerts.
And then of course the weddings, like no one fireworks one's ridiculous.
No one knows who is getting married.
No one has any, no one cares.
Like, who are you showing?
You know?
Okay, but you do know some people, like, I use Facebook this way.
I use Facebook for friends and family.
Like, I don't consider Facebook my broadcasting thing for, like, you know, TMDS, Enterprises, or whatever.
Sure.
Like, so, like, people would use Instagram that like if grandma's in, I don't know, grandma's in Vancouver, right.
Wants to see little, little Kelly, uh, doing the grade one Christmas package or whatever.
Okay.
Send her the video.
All right.
There's no need for it to be out there.
That's a good grievance.
That's almost as ridiculous as my bananas.
Okay.
Spoilers.
Okay.
I have been lucky, but I feel like I walk on eggshells and it's been very difficult like there
are some movies i highly anticipate but i'm very late at seeing these movies a good example is uh
once upon a time in hollywood have you seen this movie yes i have so since they announced that
movie i've wanted to see it but it actually took me a while i wasn't like one of those first weekend
movie theater guys it took me a while but i, anything about it, any kind of review or anyone talking about it,
I literally like would unplug and withdraw
like to prevent any spoilers.
So I managed to see that movie with no spoilers
and I'm so glad I did.
But it's been, I find it's been difficult.
The new Star Wars just came out and spoilers are-
I haven't read any spoilers.
I've seen it, but I haven't read any spoilers.
I feel like it's getting easier and easier to avoid spoilers. Did you like it? I did. Okay, because I haven't seen it yet. I've seen it, but I haven't read any spoilers. I feel like it's getting easier and easier to avoid spoilers.
Did you like it?
I did.
Okay, because I haven't seen it yet.
The internet hates it.
The internet absolutely hates it.
It's great.
But you also loved Four Christmases, right?
I did.
So is this better than Four Christmases?
I wouldn't say I love Four Christmases,
because I know you're being an asshole,
but I'll go with it on this one.
I enjoyed, it was fun. i enjoyed the things that they did i enjoyed some of the messages that they had in there um i are you satisfied with this conclusion of this whatever the third yeah you
know why because i'm a real like i am a realist and understand that there's no way they could
possibly finish this worth where everyone is going to be happy.
Like, go write your own fucking script.
Were you happy with the Game of Thrones conclusion?
Yes, it was fun.
I enjoyed it.
It is what it is. That's another one the internet likes to hate.
Oh, the internet hates.
The internet loves the entire last season.
Right, the internet loves Game of Thrones
except for the last season.
Correct, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Which is fine.
I mean, it's okay to not like something,
but then the like to the
the lengths by which people will go to trash things is pretty extensive extensive okay hit
me with another elvis grievance uh so the last one i have because i put three in one
but the last one i have is your blog toronto mic.com yeah toronto mic.com your blog sucks
you're saying yeah your blog really does suck these days. And here's why. Tell me. Your blog is basically an RSS feed for your fucking podcast.
There's no more personality to your blog.
Well, I just wrote about my technical enhancements yesterday.
Yeah, again, about your fucking podcast.
I've been busy, though.
That's a busy day.
Your blog has open mics, which is a bunch of idiots commenting on idiot things.
Not all idiots.
Myself included.
Then there's like,
you know,
the occasional dead celebrity.
You'll post about that,
which no one comments on anymore.
And then it's just a running sort of list
of all of your podcasts.
And I get it.
I understand it.
And you can do whatever the fuck you want
with your blog
before people fucking trash me for this.
But your blog sucks now.
But you thought my blog sucked before.
We had a whole 10 by the way
every once in a while when somebody tells me they'll say something like oh i like it when
elvis comes on toronto mic i'm like you know there was a there was a standalone podcast
which was just this us airing grievances that's right what we're doing right now it was fun and
you know what sucks elvis and it was great i had a great theme song and a humble howard did the
voiceover yeah it was good it was good and there's song and Humble Howard did the voiceover. Yeah, it was good. It was good. And there's 10 episodes. And only one person
listened to it.
And now a second person.
Rob J.
Right?
Right.
And then some maniac recently.
Okay, well, that's two.
That's two.
That's better than most podcasts,
by the way.
Because I'm not related
to any of those people.
And none of them are like
personal lifelong friends.
Fair enough, right.
So that's pretty good.
But I will say that those,
I make sure that those 10 episodes
of your blog sucks
remain in the Toronto
Mic'd feed
so if somebody
listening to us right now
who is subscribed
to Toronto Mic'd
wants to check out
what we're talking about
oh so it's like in the
main feed
it's not a different feed
no I had them
in a different feed
but no one subscribed
to that
who's gonna look at that
so I put them
in the Toronto Mic'd feed
look at you
so it's like a
backdoor pilot
look at you
is the hidden episode
in there
the Dean Blundell one?
Yeah, yeah.
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
In fact, I did say I was going to remove that,
and it never got a number, but it's still there.
And the Molly Johnson episode is still there.
Well, that's a real episode.
That's not going anywhere.
That's a real episode.
Go listen to that if you're listening.
Remember, when I started that episode,
I thought it would be a normal episode.
That's right.
Yeah, yeah.
That's right.
Whereas the Dean Blundell one was me recording like... Right. You also thought the Gino Vanelli episode was going to be a normal's right. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. Well, you also thought the Dean Blundell one was me recording.
Like,
right.
You also thought the Gino Vanelli episode was going to be a normal one too.
Sure.
Yeah.
That was fantastic.
People fucking love that.
You know,
those two episodes,
there's the best one.
Uh,
I,
did we ever wrap up the thought that everybody who loves any bit of,
even likes baseball needs to listen to.
Yeah.
I think we got that message.
Okay.
Okay.
I want to make sure people know they should listen to that.
That's the last.
So your blog sucks now.
And I mean that. Well, can I blog sucks now. And I mean that.
Well, can I respond?
No.
And I mean that, like, listen, I'm not telling you what to do and you can do whatever you want.
And I get that you got to, you know.
I want to address the listenership and I want to address you.
I'm going to look at you.
You got to pay the bills and you got to like do all this stuff.
I get that.
But have you ever built.
As someone who reads your blog, it sucks.
Okay, well, have you.
And I'm not disagreeing with you because most of the entries, yeah, there's
the open mic, there's the deaf notices.
You're right.
I actually wrote yesterday about my stuff, the new laptop and stuff and all the new soundboard.
And I remember as I was writing it, I'm like, I used to do this every day.
Right.
Yeah.
So my response is the obvious, which is I'm building a business from scratch, like brick
by brick.
Get that?
2020 is the first full calendar year.
Not 2020.
2019.
We haven't got 2020 yet.
2019 was the first calendar year where all of my income came from TMDS.
Fair enough.
And it really...
Actually, I will because I felt...
I want to say shout out to Chris Brown who's listening because.
The rapper?
He's not a rapper.
He's a singer.
Is he?
He doesn't rap, right?
He's a singer.
I don't know.
And a very good dancer.
And beat up Rihanna once. Right.
And probably a whole bunch of other ones.
But you know what I find interesting, a quick aside about cancel culture is some people
who get canceled easily and some people are like, no shit, I like that guy.
Like I feel like he wasn't canceled.
Like he's still,
Michael Vick should have been a guy that was canceled as well,
but,
but that was dog abuse.
Yeah.
So you can kill dogs,
but you know,
you kneel during the national anthem and you're ostracized for the rest of
your career.
Oh yeah.
That doesn't make any fucking sense.
But killing,
I will say in defense of Michael Vick is that he did show a great deal of
remorse and does do a lot of speaking for,
uh,
what's the SPCA?
Who is the,ane Society Organization?
Anyway, he is now actively exerting
a lot of energy to tell young people
animal abuse is very wrong.
He's a douche.
I feel like he is doing...
He's a major douche.
I think Chris Brown is a bigger douche
than Michael Vick.
It's called guilt.
Anyway, Chris Brown.
This is Chris Brown, my painter.
And we were meeting for brunch on Friday.
And we're having a nice brunch at the Cafe Diplomatico.
Oh, yeah.
Good place.
Collin and Clinton.
Good place.
Good place to watch the Italy game, right?
Okay.
So we're there.
And I get a text that my episode Friday afternoon had to be postponed due to a personal emergency thing.
So I'm like, oh, my God, my afternoon just blew open.
Like I had a whole big recording and that's gone.
And then we ended up just enjoying beers
and shooting the shit.
And it was really nice, Chris, to have that time with you
because I had felt so darn,
like I felt like my energy level had been decreasing.
Like I felt tired.
And I think it was a lot of work in 2019 on TMDS.
So yes, the blog entries at torontomic.com did suffer.
Absolutely.
In 2020, because I do enjoy doing that,
I promise more entries that aren't just podcast episodes.
It's fine.
Yeah, but I do want to add value there
beyond posting the podcast episodes
and open mics and deaf noises.
So I'm with you.
I'm going to fix that in 2020.
All right.
I,
uh,
I'm very frustrated by this political labeling that seems to be pervasive
everywhere.
Like you get like labeled.
Have you ever been labeled?
I don't know.
Uh,
lefty like our,
uh,
no,
no,
no.
Even when you,
well,
I don't wear my political leanings on a t-shirt.
No.
Well, I rarely wear that t-shirt,
but that's one t-shirt out of like 500 t-shirts,
the left-wing pinko.
And that was more of a Don Cherry...
And I love the biking one.
Is that a political...
Okay, so let's say,
why do you think I love biking is political?
Because I've never understood that.
It's very polarizing in the city for whatever reason.
But why is it political?
Well, because it's...
Because that's my grievance because they're that's it's fair but i mean there's because there's um
the driver versus bicycle conservatives don't bike no why no because they're in cars and you know
capitalism i feel like uh i feel like i feel like this is ridiculous but anyway this is my grievance
is that people sort of and first of all i don't even have an allegiance to a political party in this country
like i can literally have voted uh a couple of different ways over the past you know decade
right like i don't i don't i'm not a oh i always vote liberal blindly like i always i take each
election unto itself as one issues right and i look at you know my local mp or mpp and then who do i want
to defeat sometimes sometimes i'll strategically vote against the party it's true and vote for a
party that might not be my preference because i'm trying to uh defeat another party which is why i
don't like our uh system i like i don't like first past the post for that reason i but that's a whole
different rant i snuck that in once to a uh your morning Morning appearance I did where I jammed it in at the end, but no success yet.
But all this is to say this whole like labeling,
like based on the, I think it's silly
that everybody wants to, you know,
put you into a bucket, like a political bucket.
Yeah, politically, we're becoming more and more polarized
as a society, not just here.
Like Americans, because they're always like that.
Well, it's everywhere.
It's everywhere.
Yeah, I'm not sure. There has to be a breaking point at some point in time you'd figure right because it's not sustainable i don't think yeah i don't know what that breaking point looks
like though it's pretty scary i think and uh nobody's labeling you because you don't wear
your political stripes on a t-shirt correct even though you though you're very, okay, we'll leave that.
Okay.
Yeah.
All right.
Now, I still haven't seen Top Gun.
That's not a grievance.
I'm now just moving on
to let you know.
I still haven't seen it
and I'm not against seeing Top Gun
but it just hasn't been
a convenient thing to do.
It's on Amazon Prime.
You reference it a lot.
It's on.
Okay, because I have a Prime.
It's on Amazon.
I just watched it the other night.
Fucking great.
Did you ever watch,
on that same streaming service,
did you watch Fleabag?
No.
Honestly,
best show I watched in 2019
was Fleabag.
It was really,
really good.
You put out a post of,
or something,
I can't remember what it was.
Oh yeah,
I did,
yeah.
A blog entry.
Of your favorite TV shows
and I'm like,
what the fuck TV
is this guy watching?
No,
Fleabag is very popular.
It won awards.
It's not a,
I only heard of that show because you mentioned it,
but I never heard of any Emmys and stuff like that.
Like it is,
it is recognized by the mainstream.
I've never,
I I'm in the mainstream.
You should have heard of fleabag.
I'm telling you,
I've never heard of fleabag.
It's not obscure at all.
And she's like a big deal now.
Like the,
the woman behind that is now going to,
I think she might be doing something big, James Bond or something. She's writing. I don't know, but she's a, she's like a big deal now like the the woman behind that is now gonna i think she might be doing something big james bond or something she's writing i don't know but she's uh she's fantastic
interesting so anyway uh prime has it you should watch it fleabag fleabag it's excellent it really
is you know what it is it's also hard for me to watch things on prime i hate the the ui on it is
so bad and netflix is just the go-to like i'm just i go there first ui is better but the
my opinion uh well i think crave actually has better i have more things i want to see on crave
than really because they get hbo stuff and showtime stuff there's not really anything there
that i i mean there's stuff that i've been told i should watch but nothing really gets me going
like chernobyl but that chernobyl is but that's like- Chernobyl was fantastic.
It's like one in however many shows they have.
But Netflix,
I mean,
I watched The Crown
and I quite like The Crown,
okay?
Never watched The Crown.
But there's not a lot,
I don't-
Fuck The Queen.
It's a great series though.
Yeah,
sure it is.
You know,
The Queen exists.
I've heard people tell me that it's good,
but-
It's very good.
No desire to watch it.
The Queen exists.
I want to turn the channel here.
Well,
first,
before I turn the channel,
I want to say thank you to Brian Master.
So you know forever,
another Brian was a proud sponsor of this program.
He was, yeah.
A real estate agent named Brian,
who we had a jingle and good times.
In fact, I was chatting with him today
because I saw his Hebzion Sports contributions today.
He was at TMLX5, still a good friend.
And I really appreciate the years that he uh
sponsored this program and then he made a decision to not spend his marketing dollars here i don't
know if he's parked it somewhere else maybe he has no marketing dollars and that was the problem i
don't know but that's fine uh and another brian brian master from kwty, he stepped up and took on the last three months of 2019.
And Brian Master's been,
I'm going to see him tomorrow morning, actually.
So I'm going to spend my Christmas Eve morning
with Brian Master.
And he's got a fantastic monthly newsletter
that you can get if you write him at
letsgetyouhomeatkw.com.
But Brian only signed up for the final three months of 2019,
and it's tremendous he did.
So we'll be saying goodbye at the end of this month
to the partnership with Brian Master from KW Realty.
Oh, no.
So there will be a new sponsor.
I will unveil the first episode of 2020.
Ooh.
Ticking on our ass with a feather.
But I wanted to thank Brian Master
for stepping up and
sponsoring
a podcast, a Canadian
independent podcast in 2019.
It's pretty freaking awesome. So again,
let's get you home
at kw.com
is how you would
contact Brian Master.
Okay, all this.
I'm going to tell you a little story.
Hit me.
Well, before I start the story,
do you,
do you,
and if you're not comfortable
talking about this,
just say so, but if you're not comfortable talking about this, just say so,
but do you suffer from depression, like clinical depression?
I do not.
Me neither.
I do know I have loved ones who do suffer, and it sounds horrific,
and I'm lucky.
Can I say I'm blessed?
I don't know who's blessing me,
but I'm grateful to the DNA gods or whoever's out there
that I don't suffer from clinical depression.
But having said that,
I don't have that dark cloud follow me all around,
as I've heard it described.
But Mark Weisblot,
who puts together that 1236 newsletter that you and i subscribe to
he comes in once a month we talk about you know people who passed away during the month that
maybe didn't get the the press that uh like from the new york times or the you know just some some
people who passed away that maybe aren't like George Michael
or Prince or whatever.
Sure.
He told me about David Berman.
So I was like unaware of
David Berman. Like I just missed it. Like I'm not a
cool guy. You know, I'm listening to Radiohead
and Pro Jam over here. So I missed David Berman.
But David Berman
was in Silver Jews.
There were a lot of cool people who like music,
know Silver Jews.
And I did not know.
Have you ever heard of Silver Jews?
No, I have not.
I think it's the guy from Pavement
is in this with David Berman.
So he was in Silver Jews.
And I learned this from Mark Weisblatt.
So I'm literally playing this song with Mark.
It's about to change in a moment.
And I learn about the death of David Berman.
And I'm playing right now. I'm not playing Silver of David Berman. And I'm playing right now,
I'm not playing Silver Jews right now.
Right now I'm playing Purple Mountains.
And here, here's a taste of Purple Mountains. Here it is. Friends are warmer than gold
When you're old
You keep them in this heart
Than you might suppose
Lately I tend to make strangers
Wherever I go
Some of them were once Lately I tend to make strangers wherever I go.
Some of them were once people I was happy to know.
Mounting mileage on the dash.
Double darkness falling fast.
I keep stressing, pressing on.
We beat down some substratum.
Feels like something really wrong has happened.
I confess I'm barely hanging on. Hanging on All my happiness is gone
All my happiness is gone
It's all gone somewhere beyond
All my happiness is gone
All my happiness is gone.
So again, I don't know this song exists
until Wiseblood says,
load up this song
because I'm going to talk about David Berman
and you can play this song while I talk about him.
So I load it up
and then of course I'm playing it and then I play it on the episode play this song while I talk about him. So I load it up and then of course I'm playing it
and then I play it on the episode
and then I play it on my own
and then I play it again and I play it again
and then I say I got to hear more Purple Mountains.
So there's this album by Purple,
it's really David Berman's solo project,
I guess, Purple Mountains.
And the whole thing, every song to me
sounds like a suicide letter, okay?
It does, doesn't it?
Every song.
And you listen to the words
and it's kind of got a bouncy little thing.
It's kind of one of those songs like Hey Ya
or something where it sounds like
it's a happy-go-lucky song
and then you listen to the lyrics
and you're like, holy shit, this is dark.
So I've spent the last couple of months
constantly listening to Purple Mountains
and what I hear as suicide notes,
David passed away because he took his own life.
He did.
I read here that he hung himself in his apartment in New York.
And I mean, this album came out,
obviously it came out while he was still alive.
And if you listen to it,
I don't think anyone was shocked by the news.
He took his own life.
Anyway, I find myself, and I need to talk to a friend about this
because I'm not depressed.
I'm actually super happy.
I mean, Santa's coming.
Come on.
Everybody's excited.
I'm feeling good about TMDS, and I'm feeling good about life,
and I love my wife, and I love my kids,
and everyone's healthy and happy, and everything is good,
and I feel great.
I'm going to go for a bike ride after this because it's nine degrees today.
Everything is great.
But I keep listening to Purple Mountains and it's like there's this sadness
that feels like I tap into the sadness and it's like I, how do I word this?
I'm trying to be articulate here.
I'm struggling.
But did Kurt Cobain say there's a comfort in feeling sad?
Like I'm finding a comfort in riding this sadness.
Does that make sense at all to you?
It does.
I think it's okay to be sad.
I think it's a natural emotion.
There are things that make us feel sad.
I think what we're listening to though is not necessarily someone who's sad.
You know, we're listening to, though, is not necessarily someone who's sad. You know, we're listening, obviously, he had, I read that he had attempted suicide a couple of times before he was, before this most recent.
Before he was successful.
In a way.
I'm not sure that you would say successful, but yeah, I know what you mean.
Yeah, I think it's okay to be sad.
But again, I don't think that we're listening to
somebody who's sad we're listening to somebody who has a disease okay well yeah semantics aside
uh i think there's a big difference though between being sad and having a disease like
true but i don't as i as a guy you but but there's there's clinical depression and then
there's i'm depressed because i lost my job, and I'm getting divorced.
Correct.
That's like sad.
Right.
So this gentleman, David Berman, was clinically depressed.
Right.
He has a disease.
Right.
Chemical imbalance.
Needs help.
True.
Okay.
Well, what I mean by sad is that as somebody who's not afflicted with that disease, luckily that I'm tapping into like a sadness.
I realize he's not sad because his team lost the hockey game that night
that he suffers from a disease.
Of course, he's got a mental illness.
But okay, regardless, I've been tapping into this vibe,
if you will, this sentiment.
And it reminds me of when I used to work in a cubicle.
I used to work in an actual
office you know a long time ago and i used to put on my headphones and listen to alice and jane's
dirt oh right again okay like songs like this and i used to really enjoy this while i worked
and it was there was a lane st again, you won't like my terminology,
but I felt a sadness in Lane Staley's,
the plodding nature of the music and his delivery of the lyrics,
I felt was really like sad to me.
I think it's,
I don't know.
Are you struggling with the idea of,
of liking that?
I'm not sure what you're like.
I mean, I think it's
entirely okay. It's okay
to be sad. It's a natural emotion.
But I'm not sad. It's like I'm...
Someone else is sad and I'm like...
That art is...
I think it's okay to feel the feels
regardless of what those feels are.
So this is Down in a Hole.
One of my favorite
Alice in Chains jams from Dirt.
So, again, this is Festivus.
We've aired our grievances.
Are your kids excited about Santa coming?
Yeah, I guess.
I mean, Charlie is the same age as Jarvis.
Sure.
Jarvis, this is peak Santa time.
Five-year-old Jarvis is can't wait
for Santa right Charlie must
is he a similar minded
yeah I guess you hate Christmas
tell us why you hate Christmas I saw the comment
on open mic fuck Jim by the way
oh yeah I don't know fuck you Jim
well here here I'm
inviting you to tell us I think it's interesting that
Jim comments on a blog where people
are invited to comment about things that just because he happens to fucking love Christmas, I'm supposed to not comment about how I hate Christmas.
Okay, tell us.
Why do you hate Christmas?
It just sucks.
I mean, there's so many people out there who claim to believe in Christmas and the Christmas spirit yet have none of it and demonstrate zero of it.
And the entire holiday is extremely hypocritical.
uh two i am not a believer in jesus uh or the fact that he was born to a virgin mother and so therefore it doesn't really make much sense to me to celebrate the holiday uh three the commercialism
of this holiday is off the charts it's it's it's horrible yeah um and i would prefer to have
nothing to do with it. And then lastly,
I have very horrible childhood memories from Christmas
and so I choose not to.
This is a moment where I relive a lot of those
and I actually have a lot of bad adult memories
from Christmas time.
That's right around the time where I had my cancer stuff
and not so great things happened over the holidays.
So yeah, I choose to not only hate Christmas,
but to tell people that I hate Christmas.
Yeah, so I'm hearing your reasons, all of which are fine.
I mean, I also, there's no Jesus in my life,
so there's no religious connotation to Christmas.
And I also am turned off
by the crass commercialism at this time of year.
Right.
The need to consume stuff.
But you're a better person.
You're a better person than me.
No, but.
Because you can do something I can't.
Which is cherry pick.
Correct.
Which I absolutely do
because I don't participate in the commercialism at all.
Don't participate in the religious part at all.
And I still like this time of year primarily because,
um,
well,
yeah,
crack.
Okay.
So what are you cracking open there?
The,
uh,
this is hops for hunger,
the white eggnog stout.
I,
to be honest with you,
not entirely sure I'm going to like this,
but I'm opening this up because,
um,
it is in, so this beer is brewed in support of the daily bread food bank and i know that i didn't buy this beer you did not buy this
beer mike but in the spirit of the motherfucking holidays i will donate twenty dollars right now
if i can do it via paypal if not, I'll do it when I get home
to the Daily Bread Food Bank in honor of this beer.
And people who go to the Great Lakes Retail Store,
which is Queen Elizabeth Boulevard
near Queensway in rural York,
if you go pop in and buy a Hops for Hunger
White Eggnog Stout,
a dollar from each can is going to the Daily Bread Food Bank.
It's good, right?
Oh my God.
Yeah, I had...
I love this.
Okay, hold on.
This is...
Wow.
So I'm going to pop one open now.
Hops for Hunger
White Eggnog Stout.
This is a fantastic beer.
That's why I chilled it for you
because we usually do winter ale.
Yes, we do.
But I thought we'd do
the Hops for Hunger here.
I'm going to the Daily Bread Food Bank.
Okay.
Yeah, I think they're by the way i think
you could walk from here to the daily bread food bank okay yeah it's super local hyper local as i
say but great great great cause so just to wrap that up i think it's your purse i think what the
real winner there is uh if you will is that final thing that you mentioned about personal experiences
and connotations and memories of christmas i believe that's the overwhelming reason you're
hating christmas and you can't cherry pick because you mentioned the cancer diagnosis
and some stuff when you were younger.
I believe that would be the,
that would, that's a fan,
that would be a kick-ass reason
to hate this holiday.
But you don't, you don't,
like there's no joy that comes to you
just by the fact that Charlie, for example,
is so excited about it.
And then Santa comes
and then, you know,
Santa drank the milk
or ate the
cookies or whatever and then there's there's like transformers for charlie or whatever that the elves
made at the north pole from hasbro or whatever and you don't like none of that gets you're not
like able to like uh be happy because of that no yeah we are that's where we i get i get i mean i
don't know what else to say i know know I don't like it at all.
There's nothing about it.
I guess, you know, I don't necessarily agree with this either, but there are some people
who say, you know, we spend, you know, as parents, we spend so much time and energy
trying to make our kids be honest and, you know, be good people.
And then I know where you're going right at the right from birth.
We introduced. I struggle where you're going. Right from birth, we introduced this.
I struggle with this too,
but what are the options to opt out
and tell them from the get-go this is...
I'll give you that.
I'm not with you on that.
I struggle with that too, by the way.
It is interesting.
And I've done it four times now.
You've done it three times.
I've done it four times.
And it's true.
When you're telling this,
and my five-year-old at least is so inquisitive.
I'm like, whoa,
I don't remember this kind of in-depth questions from my teenagers when they were the same age oh really but i'm getting really detailed
interesting questions about it all and basically my go-to answer is uh it's magic like that's like
it's magic yeah yeah i think one of my friends had his uh his kid was it you you might have said this
let me hear santa person did did you type that or
someone else did it was no one of my friends i think it was one of my friends they asked their
kids asked him if if santa was a person well maybe it was me because that sounds like a jarvis
question he didn't he didn't really know what to do he didn't know how to answer that sort of like
oh yeah off the cuff we yes it was me okay so jarvis's question was yeah is he a person or an elf was the question
and yeah
and yeah there was a whole like these are the
Jarvis is a different cat man
it keeps me on my toes all the time
like just go with a kid
just roll with a kid and then later we'll
talk yeah the more questions you ask the less presents
you get shut up
but okay so I'm
able to cherry pick the good stuff and leave the shit
behind and you you're not happy at this time so on that note i uh and i feel like this is a maybe
we need a trigger warning on this episode for anybody who's donation made mike look so elvis
has donated money to the daily bread food bank and he was inspired by great lakes hop for hunger
hops for hunger the white eggnog stout so
good on you elvis that's a good cause for sure so i asked you to tell me like songs uh how did i
word it do you remember did i ask you for sad songs we went back and forth we went back and
forth it was like on hangout so i'm not sure how we can define it but i think we it was kind of
songs that i think we initially said sad songs,
and then I asked, is it songs that make me sad?
Yeah, I wanted sad songs that make you sad.
Yeah.
So I have a playlist on my phone that's called The End.
And this is the first song.
Get some Purple Mountains on there, man.
No, this is the second song.
Let's hear what we're listening to here. So here's your holiday Hope you enjoy it this time
Man, that gets me every time.
If this poem could fix this home, I'd read it every day.
So this song is written about his parents' divorce
from the perspective of the child.
And man, it's just such a heartbreaking song because you have to imagine
i i don't come from a broken home and um i'm i'm together with my wife now and but i can only
imagine the pain and hurt that this could cause if it's not handled in the absolute perfect way
um yeah i mean it's just such a sad song to listen to this guy put his emotions out
into lyrics about how his parents' divorce made him feel.
Okay, so your parents did not divorce and you have never been divorced.
Correct.
So I need to do a quick message to divorced dads who are listening.
This is just because I am a divorced dad.
And I know there's a lot of divorced dads
that are listening and this message is basically uh brace yourself when you sit down to watch um
the marriage story on netflix this is a noah boom bob i want to see that now okay so in my very i
watched it i watched it with my wife who has never been divorced. Right. How did it make you feel?
Okay, it's tough.
It's tough viewings.
I'm just letting the divorced dads know.
Because I will say, Elvis, I'm very happy for you that you've never been divorced.
And I hope you never are divorced.
And it's a movie that I found tough to watch, to be honest.
And I never had lawyers involved.
And I watched this movie now this is maybe the smartest thing my ex and i ever did was we didn't involve lawyers once once a divorced lawyer gets involved
then the other party needs to get a divorced lawyer as well and then it becomes lawyer to
lawyer and then it escalates and then the end result is that the typically that uh you end up spending a lot of
money and the kid gets hurt like it's really because really you gotta so my my ex and i we
got divorced uh without lawyers and completely 100 making sure our two children had as little
emotional damage as possible as their parents part ways or whatever. But this movie,
which was a very good movie,
Kylo Ren is in it.
Yes.
And Black Widow.
Right.
Right.
It's tough viewing.
I think it's,
I think the way you see it as a divorced dad is different than the way you see it if you're not a divorced dad.
So maybe in a divorce,
I don't know.
Maybe divorced moms also.
I don't know.
But particularly divorced dads,
uh,
I'm speaking to now,
just brace yourself when you watch this.
It's tough viewing, but it is a very...
It's on my list.
It's a good movie.
It's literally on my list.
Okay.
I think you'll enjoy it.
This song is so brutal, but it's a good song.
Like it really is.
I enjoy the song.
Did we say it's Splink 182?
Splink 182.
Good one.
And they're back.
This was a band that I really, really enjoyed in the early 2000s.
Really did like them. So Elvis and I have brought five
sad songs that make us sad
to this festive episode
of Toronto Mike. So again, trigger warning
if you're... Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Yeah, please reach out
if you're feeling depressed and talk
to me. How's that? My DMs, by the way,
are open. No joke. If you do need to talk
about something at Toronto Mike on Twitter, DMs always open. Love of mine
Someday you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white.
Just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark. If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied and illuminate the nose
on their vacancy signs.
If there is no one beside you
when your soul embarks,
then I'll follow you into the dark.
Wow.
Death Cab for Cutie.
It's intense.
As vicious as Roman rule. i will follow you into the dark and again just um
a sad song that makes me feel sad and there's something about and again i'm actually like
i think i have a very healthy approach to death in that i don't like i don't it's it's going to
happen to me and i know that and I feel like
I know a lot of people who are like
I heard Peter Gross the other day told me
I'm not going to die like I'm not
going to die and it's I have
a different approach which is I will die
and I will leave
this and he's 95
right around the corner
I'm kidding he's turning 70 in 2020.
Oh, good for him.
And his partner in crime there, John Gallagher, turns for the first...
Actually, I don't even want to say it.
He revealed in episode 21 of Gallagher and Gross Save the World,
he revealed for the first time ever his real age.
He's been lying about his age his entire career.
They're up to 21 episodes.
Yeah, I dropped six yesterday.
Yeah, yeah, I saw that.
You dropped them early.
We're supposed to drop them today. Yeah, because the
first episode is an airing of grievances for
Festivus, and I said, fuck it, what am I holding
onto these things for? I'm going to drop them.
Do they do all six at the same time? Yeah, we did
six in the same afternoon. Wow,
that's a lot of, that's a lot of talking.
Man.
But I guess that's the way you do it, right? It's only
22 minutes. And they're professionals, too.
They would be used to that.
Yeah, so this is a song I but I guess that's the way you do it, right? It's only 22 minutes. And they're professionals, too. They would be used to that. Yeah.
So this is a song.
Who is it by?
I don't know.
Death Cab for Cutie.
Gotcha.
What's it called?
I Will Follow You Into the Dark.
We should say that the first song is one that you gave to me.
Okay, this is a funny story.
We fought about it a little bit.
I was at Sloan with my brother Steve.
Last time I saw Sloan
was with you.
Yeah, that's right.
And it was the same venue,
the Phoenix.
Yeah.
And this was like
on the weekend.
And I told him
about the premise
for the show
and I said,
as a random example
of the kind of songs
I meant,
I threw at you
Stay Together for the Kids
by Blink-182.
Just off the top of my head
I was thinking of sad songs
and I said,
oh, that's a sad one.
I could have gone
with Adam's Song by Blink-182. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is super sad too. Just right off the top of my head, I was thinking of sad songs. I said, oh, that's a sad one. I could have gone with Adam's Song by
Blink-182, which is super sad
too. Anyway,
coincidentally, that was on your top five.
So, yeah.
I'll prove it. I feel like I need
to prove it.
No, you don't need to prove it. Why would you lie to me?
Yeah, why would you lie to me?
I wouldn't. Yeah, why would I? After all these years
together. Yeah, that's right right you got me in porno
yeah I did get you in a porno
so this is um
I guess this would kind of be like a
guilty pleasure band of mine
yeah I okay
do you want to know my thoughts on this band
because it's one of the
you know how you feel about Pearl Jam
and Radiohead
that's how I feel about Good Charlotte.
I really, really dislike their sound.
Which is fair.
To me, it sounds like they're trying to be punk
or something, but it comes off as faux pop.
I think that comes
with how they dress.
Right? But I mean,
turn it up.
It's not punk
at all.
We all have the same things to go through. Turn it up. It's not punk at all.
I feel like it's... This is funny.
I picked this song.
I like this song, but I'm going to trash them here.
They sound like a poor, poor, poor, poor man's green day.
Right?
Exactly.
Right?
Which I appreciate, which is why they're a guilty pleasure.
But this song is a song written, I'm not sure if there was anyone in mind necessarily,
but this is a song written to someone who may be considering suicide.
And quite literally asking someone to hold on because there's better options than choosing to not be here.
Like we talk to somebody,
regardless of how you may feel about a particular situation today.
The better option is to stick around because there are people who love you
and there are people who want you to hold on.
I learned, so I loved 102.1 throughout the 90s.
Have I ever mentioned that before?
And then at some point in the early 2000s,
they had an edge fest at Molson Amphitheater
because I used to go to them.
They were at Molson Park and Berry.
And then they moved to Downsview Park
and I was still going.
Right. And then they did one. i remember alan cross was the program director
because i wrote him an email about this and he responded right away and i'm like this alan cross
guy's responsive like if i ever start a podcast keep that in mind okay so so i uh they were having
an edge fest at molson amphitheater and the headlining band was good. Charlotte was good. Charlotte.
Wow.
And that was the moment I realized,
Oh,
I've aged out of this demo.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a,
it's a,
yeah,
this would be like,
I don't even know what year this was,
but this is probably what,
like early 2003,
maybe.
Yeah.
Around there.
Yeah.
We're,
you're an old man in 2003,
Mike,
because I know I was,
which means you were too.
How long is that? 15? No, that's
17.
Yeah, I was
in the early 30s. I want to get this right
because someone's going to call us out on that.
Are you an old man in early 30s? I felt too
old for that station when
this Edgefest was
headlined by Good Charlotte.
Because I was used to the Edgefest.
They were always headlined by Foo Fighters
or Tragically Hip.
I saw Hole.
Although I saw some cheesy bands headlined like Creed.
They won the Much Music Video Award that year.
Yeah.
Much is another one I aged out of at that time.
Yeah.
And also, shout out to Nickelback,
who I saw headline an Edgech fest in Molson Park.
And I saw them back. So they did the small stage
one year I went to itch fest. And the very
next year they headline.
Can-Con.
Do you need Can-Con for your
You know there's people who love Nickelback.
Well they sold a lot of albums.
In the United States people love Nickelback and they
don't understand why we don't like them.
Anyway that's my good Charlotte song. I don't hate Nickelback. I'm actually and they don't understand why we don't like them. Anyway, that's my good Charlotte song.
I don't hate Nickelback.
I'm actually one of their defenders.
Yeah, I don't like Nickelback.
I like the state.
That was the album I liked from Nickelback.
Okay, I'm going to listen to the beginning of this,
and then I'm going to pee.
Oh, God.
I'm going to cry. 6 a.m. day after Christmas
I throw some clothes on in the dark
The smell of cold
The car seat is freezing
The world is sleeping
I am
No
Up the stairs to her apartment
She is balled up on the couch
Her mom and dad went down to Charlotte
They're not home to find us now And we drive
Now that I have found someone
I'm feeling more alone
Than I ever have before
She's a brickbrickin' up, drownin' slowly
Off the coast and I'm headin' nowhere
She's a-brickin' up, drownin' slowly Now I always liked Ben Folds and his piano rock.
I do as well.
I didn't appreciate him as much as I do now.
But I really do like Ben Folds.
And I still sing that song Army to my kids all the time.
But Brick.
Fucking sad.
It is.
You know what?
This reminds me of a song that I didn't choose,
but would be close to the top of my list,
which is...
Would you say this is his best song?
Is this your most favorite song of Ben Folds?
I would say this might be his magnus opus.
You think so?
Okay, so maybe it's not a great example,
but it made me think of this song
by another band who
I'm not sure anyone would say is
their best song by any stretch, but
for me, it's
my favorite, and I think it's
a great song, but
also makes me feel sad, which is
Lovers in a Dangerous Time by Bitter Naked Ladies.
Yes. And I'm not sure why,
because it's not necessarily a sad song so much, but.
But the line,
kick at the darkness till it bleeds daylight.
Yeah, yeah.
Like, think about that line.
Yeah, maybe.
You know, I had Bernie Finkelstein here.
You said, what do you call him?
Bernie.
Bernie Finkel.
I'm a Finkel.
I'm going to Stinkle my fine.
You know, he was, he was managing,
he still is,
but he was managing Bruce Colburn when that song.
Yeah. I mean song was written.
And this is back in the days where you had to buy physical music, right?
And finding that was very difficult because it was on a soundtrack.
Not a soundtrack.
It was on a tribute.
Oh, a compilation.
It was on a compilation.
A tribute to Bruce Colburn.
Called Kick of the Darkness.
I was thinking of Mm-Mm-Mm-Mm by-
Crash the Dummies.
Crash the Dummies.
Winnipeg Zone.
That was on
Once There Was This World.
What soundtrack was it on?
No, you're thinking
of Peter Pumpkinhead.
You're thinking
Peter Pumpkinhead
was on the soundtrack
for Dumb and Dumber.
Peter Pumpkinhead
was the other
Crash Test Dummies song.
Was it?
Was it the other
Crash Test Dummies?
Peter Pumpkinhead.
But I think
mmm, mmm, mmm
was on the
Was that the actual album?
And God Shuffled His Feet maybe?
Maybe, yeah, yeah.
Does that sound familiar?
That guy had skinny arms
but a deep voice.
So this song makes me think of,
for whatever reason,
I was reminded as I was peeing,
it reminded me of
Lovers in a Dangerous Time
as a song that does make me feel sad.
This is, yeah,
this is a good choice, Mike,
because it's a good song, too,
as opposed to Good Charlotte,
which is not necessarily a good song,
but I love it.
But your Good Charlotte jam
was popular.
Very popular. We never confuse popular with good. Yeah, it's true, true song, but I love it. But your Good Charlotte jam was popular. Very popular.
We never confuse popular with good.
It's true.
Listen, I own it.
Oh, and I'm full of guilty pleasures.
Yeah, we all are.
And I think this show is good
because we are not afraid to be who we are.
Fuck the gyms of the world. Wake me up when September ends
Like my father's come to pass
Seven years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends
Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are.
As my memory rests, but never forgets what I lost.
Wake me up when September ends. So this song is about Billy Joel, Billy Joel.
I'm in a New York state of mind.
This is about Mr. Armstrong losing his dad.
This is about Mr. Armstrong losing his dad.
His dad died.
And this is his song to his father.
And apparently they were a tight family.
And he was the youngest, I believe.
And so it affected him in a way that I think it didn't affect his siblings necessarily. And yeah, so this song is about him losing his dad.
And my father is old and very ill at the moment.
And I would imagine that at some point in time,
over the course of the next little while,
I will be losing my father.
But it's, I mean, this is a, so for me,
Green Day is one of the best bands ever.
I really enjoy Green Day.
This is a remarkably great song,
but then also it was a very sad song
about something that a lot of us go through,
which is losing a dad, a parent,
someone who's close to you.
And September is the metaphor for the time
when you got to move away from it.
The leaves are falling off the trees.
Yep.
You want to get out of there.
You just want September to end.
But it's a good song, right?
It's a great song.
Do you like this song?
I like this album, actually.
This is the American Idiot album.
Yes, that's right.
And they have, okay.
The longevity. I really like Jesus ofot album. Yes, that's right. And they have, okay. The longevity.
I really like Jesus of Suburbia
because to me,
that's like the modern day
Paradise by the Dashboard Lake
where it's like five songs in one.
Yeah.
I just think it's an epic song.
And I did see that stage production
in that North York theater
in Mel Lastman Square,
whatever that theater's called.
I saw American Idiot
on stage.
Anyway, this song is
great.
And I'm very sorry to
hear about your dad
though.
Like, uh, if you may,
cause I actually, cause
I, I, every day I, uh,
seek to be the world's
greatest dad.
This is my every day.
Right.
You know, Morgan called
me at three in the
morning.
I heard her little voice
calling daddy and i ran
over and she had a bad dream and i was lying with her and telling her about like all the good things
in her life and how much i loved her and i was like when i die because i told i'm going to die
when i die like if my four children say you know they i'm glad he was my dad. It's like, uh, I did it.
I don't,
whatever the rest doesn't matter.
As long as those four kids say,
I'm glad he was my dad.
Just wait until you hear my fourth song.
Mike.
I'm crying.
Cause I'm thinking of poor Morgan.
Cause she's so,
you know,
just Morgan had a bad dream last night.
This is last night.
And I was,
I just lay beside her and I was telling her how much,
how much I love her and all the fun stuff coming up. That's what Christmas I talked about. Santa's
coming and maybe you'll get a unicorn, something or other. And then she fell asleep. And then
all this is cause I don't, I do not have, uh, any of these warm, fuzzy feelings about
my dad. And then I'm hearing you talk about your dad dying. And I'm thinking like, if
you, if you, what if you had a good dad and you loved your dad and your dad was going to
pass away?
Like that's gotta be tough for you.
Yeah.
Um,
it is.
And it isn't,
uh,
cause I think I'm,
I'm,
I'm similar to you in the sense that everyone dies.
And so it's just a natural thing.
How old is your old,
is your dad?
He's over 80.
So he's an old man um everyone dies everyone
dies i mean i i'm i'm not broken up by it um if anything i more broken up by the fact that he's
probably suffering more than i would have liked him to
all around me are familiar faces Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head, I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kinda funny, I find it kind of funny.
I find it kind of sad.
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had.
I find it hard to tell you.
I find it hard to take.
When people run in circles, it's a very, very mad world.
Elvis, did you and I ever kick out covers we like better than the original?
Did we ever do that?
I don't think so.
That's a good one.
Yeah, because this is a very rare example of a cover I prefer to the original.
Joe Cocker.
I call it Joe Cocker.
Oh, yes.
Yeah.
Because that's better than the Beatles.
Well, they gave that one to Ringo.
Which is rare
that's a ringo this is a good song so this of course is a tears for fear song from uh their
massive album which i think most people my age owned uh songs from the big chair and it was an
okay song but when i heard this is from i heard this on the Donnie Darko soundtrack.
Michael Andrews is this guy who's singing Mad World cover.
And it was like, reinvented the song for me.
I like this version.
And it's sad and haunting almost.
By the way, Stu Stone was in Donnie Darko.
Do you know that?
Yeah, you mentioned that.
He mentioned that too.
Did you like his documentary?
Loved his movie.
I emailed him as well.
Speaking of father issues.
I was on an email rampage after the last TMLX.
Yeah, loved his movie.
If you haven't seen it, watch it.
Jack of Old Trades starring Mike Wellner.
Great movie.
Yeah.
He's in it
two or three times.
Stu Stone,
your sister's hot, man.
Ooh.
Gotta say it.
Sorry.
He's a listener, you know.
He's sister's hot.
He might be watching
on Periscope right now.
By the way,
if people haven't figured out yet,
we're taking turns of our jam.
So this one's mine.
Green Day belonged to Elvis.
Yep.
Ben Folds 5 was mine.
Good Charlotte was definitely Elvis's.
Death Cab for Cutie was mine.
And Blink-182 was Elvis's.
Elvis, you're a father of three.
I am.
Would you consider that your most important job?
Yes, by far.
Listen to the words.
Listen to the words.
A child arrived just the other day He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talking for I knew it
And as he grew, he'd say
I'm gonna be like you, Dad say, I'm gonna be like you, Dad. You know I'm gonna be like you.
And the cat's in the cradle and a silver spoon, little boy blue and the man on the moon.
When you're coming home, Dad, I don't know when, but we'll get together then, son.
You know we'll have a good time then
i would say this is the fatherhood anthem
uh and you didn't want the ugly kid joe version
the first version i was familiar with was like a kid joe because the video is played a bunch of music all the time. This is the saddest part.
Man, this is... So this is the original, thank you for playing this one,
versus the Cat Stevens version.
Harry Chapin.
Yeah.
Tragically died on the Long Island Expressway.
He stopped his car on the road because he had mechanical trouble
and a truck just rammed into him.
Had three very young children.
Terrible.
And he was, at the time, like one of the most renowned stars.
He won multiple Grammys and, yeah, he was the man.
Anyway, died too early.
But, yeah, this is just such a, for me, just such a sad song
because I think this is like every, and maybe it's because I travel a lot or like, I mean, you mentioned it.
This is like the sort of dad anthem.
But I mean, if you listen to the lyrics, it's an upbeat song.
But if you listen to the lyrics, it's incredibly sad.
Very sad.
This son just wanting the attention of his dad, but his dad constantly being busy doing doing other things which is so easy for us to fall
in the trap of um do you ever feel like when you're when you're in i don't know when you're
on the road somewhere singapore wherever the hell you go yeah and you're like in a hotel room at
night do you ever feel like yeah you want to be with your three children you're 100 of course yes
100 that's got to be tough it is tough it is. But at the same time, I mean, you said, you know,
is, is being a dad the most important job it is, but the other,
the next most important job or being part of a dad is,
is also this compulsion I have to, we all have to provide, you know,
and you got to pay the mortgage, you got to pay, feed the family.
Not that it's, you know, not that I do it alone. My wife contributes.
She, she works full time as well, but there is, you know, not that I do it alone. My wife contributes. She works full time as well.
But there is, you know, I was raised in a society where that was, I was told every day that that was a man's duty.
And so there is that responsibility I have.
And I just happen to be in a space where I do travel.
And that is part of the job.
I think my brother, I don't know.
I better not tell
because he does listen,
but I think my brother
might have suppressed a promotion
because it meant more time away.
Like he limited himself
in terms of salary
to spend more time
at home in Toronto.
He's a better person than I am.
I have said.
Well, of course he is.
Well, yeah, I mean, yeah. I'm going to see him tomorrow night. He's a better person than I am. I have said. Well, of course he is. Well, yeah, I mean, yeah.
I'm going to see him tomorrow night. He's coming over. I'm having
a little Christmasy pizza
party. He's a good dude. Both brothers
or just? Ryan said no.
I invited them both and Ryan
declined and then his excuse
was he was going to be at
he's going to be at the old mill or something.
And I thought to myself-
The old mill?
Yeah.
What, is he dating a grandmother now or what?
Is he dating an old woman?
No, I don't think she's an old woman.
Or a man, for that matter?
No, an age-appropriate woman.
Fair enough.
He's part of the old mill.
I mean, as you know, geographically, that's really close to here.
Sure.
You could do both.
Right.
Yeah, it is.
But that's okay.
The old mill is not far.
Okay.
So that,
by the way,
cat in the cradle.
Yeah.
Cat's in the cradle.
Cat's in the cradle.
And I did take a live version
because it was already in my library.
Oh,
look at you.
But,
yeah,
really like,
how do you say that word?
I don't know.
You said it fine.
I was just,
it's a funny word.
Library.
It seems like that,
that first R is unnecessary.
You want it to be library?
Because everyone wants to say library, right?
But it's actually library.
Do you frequent your library in Oshawa?
We do.
Mostly because I think of the children.
I haven't gone to the library in a long time for my own purposes.
I go all the time.
When I had the gentleman from the Flyer Vault.
Dude, you picked this song. Oh, yeah. I should point out, Elvis doesn't know what songs I picked. I go all the time. When I had the gentleman from the Flyer Vault. Dude, you picked this song.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I should point out, Elvis doesn't know what songs I picked.
I only know his songs, so I can load them up.
And the brand new soundboard, which I love because I can see the waveform.
When your day is long, the night, the night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this life
Hang on
Hang on.
Don't let yourself go. Because everybody cries.
And everybody hurts sometimes
I love REM.
Probably the most underappreciated band of our generation.
I don't know what your thoughts are on that.
So they would, it was funny, as soon as you started playing it,
I had that reaction to be like, oh my god, this song, because I do like this
song, but they would be on my
list of bands that I can't stand.
They would be number three. I've already mentioned
one and two. Not a fan of R.E.M.
Well, I'm not.
They're no Aerosmith.
They have Aerosmith.
Yeah, well, they're not. They're no ACDC.
They're no ACDC either.
But they do have more songs that I appreciate than the other two, for sure.
Man on the Moon is another good one.
I do enjoy Man on the Moon.
Just for whatever reason, I never really got into them.
I think maybe Michael Stipe was too weird for me at the time.
I don't know.
He was the Gord Downie of USA.
That's what they say, which is so ironic because I am in love with Gord Downie.
Right.
Which, I don't know if you cut it out, but we may be playing.
Yeah, I cut it out. Don't worry.
Yeah, so
listen, it's a song that deserves to be
on your list. For sure. I'm not going to argue.
And the video really left an imprint
in my mind because I was, this is from
the era when I was still really
high on much music and
videos. Yeah, they play this a lot.
And I can see,
even as I hear it,
I see people like abandoning their cars on the freeway or whatever.
Yeah.
Like,
like you on your,
in the 407 when you're going back to Oshawa or whatever,
you just sort of like park the car and.
You know what other song that I thought of putting on my list that this
reminds me of for whatever,
I don't know why it reminded me of it,
but it just came into my head was no rain. Yeah blind melon with the b girl yeah and i think it's just because we're
sad about what could have been with that band shannon hoon it's a good band he died one year
too late to be in the 27 club that's right he did 28 but you know what is with these guys did they
just decide they broke up with rem they just decide? They broke up. With REM. They just stopped recording.
They're all alive, which is interesting.
So they're not touring.
Because I feel like if they toured, they could make a fortune.
A hundred percent, yes.
There's a lot of money they're leaving on the table.
But they, because this is a rare example of like, you know, Pearl Jam, which has changed
their drummer a hundred times.
Right.
Although they've had Matt Cameron from Soundgarden for a long time now, to be honest.
But everyone else in that band is the original member
like Mother Love Bone meets
Shadows plus Ed Vedder
do you have any Soundgarden songs?
or Chris Cornell?
not to spoil it?
because there's another song that I thought of too
that makes me epically sad
is the Chris Cornell duet he does with his daughter
Nothing Compares to You
see that's I feel like although that is a sad song duet he does with his daughter, Nothing Compares to You?
I feel like, although that is a sad song. It's a heartbreaking song.
That's a sad song. I mean, he's singing it with
his daughter. I mean, he was, I
don't believe,
did they sing, I think she might have
recorded her parts after he died.
I can't remember. You know what,
now that, you know, I know you don't listen to Toronto Mike, which is
really dumb, by the way,
but that's okay.
It is.
There's an episode I did last week with Cam Gordon from Twitter Canada
and Stu Stone.
Oh yeah,
I saw that.
I would have listened to that too.
All we did was play music from music,
musicians we lost in this past decade.
Awesome.
The decade's coming to a close.
Yeah, yeah.
And of course we spent a lot of,
and I kind of,
I got some suggestions from Cam and Stu,
and then I threw in my own,
and then I decided the order,
and we sort of counted down.
But you get to...
We talk a lot about Chris Cornell,
who we lost this past decade.
Who's the last artist you talk about?
Is it Chris Cornell?
I can't remember.
Was it in order?
I can't remember.
Was it in order?
Yeah, I put it in an order.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chris Cornell would have to be up there, right?
Chris Cornell, Prince.
Scott Weiland also. But yeah, Chris Cornell. Scott Weiland. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Scott Weiland also,
but yeah,
Chris Scott Weiland,
Scott Weiland.
I honestly can't remember.
George Michael's on there.
Michael Jackson,
I guess.
Nope.
That was 2009.
Oh,
really?
So that was last decade.
Okay.
Ineligible.
Ineligible.
Elvis Presley.
Is he still alive?
1977.
He was.
I was one year,
one month,
one day old when he died alive? 1977. I was one year, one month, one day old when he died.
Fun fact.
Fun fact.
I hurt myself today to see if I still feel.
I focus on the pain, the only thing that's read. The needle tears the hole.
The old familiar sting.
Try to kill it all away.
But I remember everything.
What have I
become
My sweetest
friend
Everyone
I know
Goes away
In the
end
And you could have it all my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you Inspired choice, Elvis.
So great, right?
Love it.
I mean, just the...
Yeah, you could just see the...
Hear the passion.
It's almost like you can...
It's like he's getting emotionally attached,
which I guess any good artist does,
but you can just feel the emotion in his voice.
And it's at the end of his life
and his wife is there in the video.
I can see her,
the Carter family,
and she's at the end of her life.
And it's like,
what Trent Reznor said,
I wrote this song for,
it was as if he wrote it for Johnny Cash to perform it.
This is a great example
when we do do our cover songs
that are better than the original
and I love the original
Nine Inch Nails,
Kurt.
Right?
But this is better.
Oh my goodness.
Yeah,
it's just,
it's heartbreaking.
It's,
I mean,
imagine we feel the way
we do partially
because he died
very shortly thereafter
but man,
it's just such a
pure raw song.
It's so great.
Shout out to Rick Rubin, too, for giving this man a voice to our generation.
Rusty Cage.
Speaking of Chris Cornell.
The man in black.
He's Johnny Cash's.
Yeah.
Such a talent.
And the way they produce this, I i mean it's just so good my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurt
if i could start again, a million miles away, I would keep myself, I would find a way.
So good. She's a
empty canvas
untouched
she's
of clay
Her
legs
spread out
before me
As her body was still Lay spread out before me
As her body was still
Oh, five horizons revolved around the sun
As the earth to the sun Now the air I tasted and breathed
Has taken a turn
And all I taught her was
Everything
So other than this All I taught her was everything.
So other than this,
this song makes me cry every time I hear it because it sucks so bad.
Why is it sad for you?
Have you not listened to the lyrics, Elvis?
No.
Maybe I'll turn up.
Listen to the lyrics of this song.
Very sad song.
I will now because we
we differ
our opinions differ
with regards to
this band
and this song
I will say
the album 10
by Pearl Jam
yep
definitely
I look back
at my 40
again
I got some years
on you Elvis
my 45 years
of life
yeah oh my god listen I got some years on you, Elvis. My 45 years of life.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
Let's listen. Listen.
Now, I listened to 10.
If I had some ability to see
which albums have I heard the most times in my 45 years of life,
10 is in the top 10.
This album meant so much to me.
Every track on this album meant so much to me.
And Black, which I don't believe was ever released as a single, by the way.
There's definitely no video.
And it did get picked up on radio because people
like loved it dj's discovered and said holy what's this and they played it and my bitter hands
i will just say this is one of my uh one of my still one of my favorite pearl jam songs i think
it's the fact you don't love this song means you must just have something that turns you off of anything this band produces.
Because if you were to come cold, let's say you've never heard of Pearl Jam, and you were to come cold now, and I were to play for you black, I bet you anything you'd leave it and go, that's a great song.
Probably.
Because I do.
I mean, I'm stuck in the 90s.
This is what I listen to in my car.
I don't know what it is.
I have something wrong with this band.
Oh, like me and the Dave Matthews band.
I have it with the Dave Matthews band.
Oh, do you?
I know what you mean.
But you know what?
Sorry to interrupt, but I'm not a cold-hearted asshole when it comes to this stuff.
Some other stuff maybe, because I've talked about this on the show.
Alice in Chains,
180 degree turnaround. Bush,
180 degree turnaround. Soundgarden.
Oh no. I always love Soundgarden. I always love Soundgarden. Those two bands,
Alice in Chains and Bush, I didn't
hate them necessarily, but I didn't
appreciate them as much as I do now.
I can't get over whatever happened
to me on the side of the road in a
dark area with Pearl Jam.
No, I'm joking.
That would be the only explanation that would make sense to me.
I don't know.
It's if you were sodomized to this song.
A hazing ritual or something.
I've never been unwillingly sodomized.
Ever.
What are your thoughts on Nirvana?
Love Nirvana.
I mean, but Nirvana is also...
Can I have a pet theory?
You want to hear it?
Is it like you were one of the other?
Is it like you're Batman or Superman?
I felt this, yes.
I felt this in 1991.
Maybe that's what it was.
That you had to choose a team.
I felt this sensation.
I felt like you were either a Nirvana guy
or a Pearl Jam guy
when Nevermind and Ten
were both kind of climbing the charts or whatever
and I felt you need to make a choice.
I remember at the time, and I was a teenager at the time,
I made a decision to love them
both because I love them both. But I did
feel a sensation like you needed to be
one or the other. Is it possible
you don't like Pearl Jam because you love Nirvana?
That is...
I never thought of that.
You're such a meanie.
That's a distinct possibility.
I've never thought of it.
That would make sense to me.
I need to go into the annals.
Annals.
I have to go into the annals of my brain to understand.
Can you please dive into the annals?
Because I,
there are examples of things in art and pop culture and stuff
where I just don't hate,
I don't like something because I like
okay you know what a good example is
ready for this
I feel like I would be conscious
I can't get behind Alex Ovechkin
I still can't root for Alex Ovechkin
because I'm a Crosby guy
yeah yeah
and I really feel this
like I'm a Crosby guy
yeah that's fair
but that's an example
of a guy you would
you could
I mean he's a fantastic
yeah but he's not as good as Crosby
right
so you're with me here
but a lot of people are like
how can you not like Ovechkin?
He's the best goal scorer ever maybe and an interesting guy and kind of full of life.
And you saw he's still celebrating that Stanley Cup win.
But I'm like, I felt like an allegiance to Sidney Crosby.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
He can't cheer for the Russians.
That's the way it is.
Right.
It'd be like cheering for the Habs.
You know what?
Let me noodle on that.
That's a good theory on the Nirvana and Pearl Jam.
I never thought of that.
Noodle on that one.
So we've done five each, by the way.
I got to pee again.
Oh, no.
You're playing this?
I got to pee.
Well, you'll hear it from the TMDS toilet. The The The The
The
The
The
The
The
The
The
The
The
The The Sundown in the Paris of the prairie
We kings of all treasures buried
All you hear are the rusted breezes
Pushing around
Where the vain Jesus
Is
As if a lighter
Receives the killer's fate
Maybe it's someone As if a lighter receives the killer's face
Maybe it's someone standing in a killer's place
Twenty years for nothing, well, there's nothing new
Besides, no one's interested in something you didn't do Kings and pretty things
Let's just see what the morning rain Hey Elvis, talk to me, buddy.
One of the most thoughtful gifts I ever received
was from my wife.
She bought a...
I might have a picture of it, even.
A wood...
A wood rectangle with a Canadian flag painted on it
and then some of the lyrics to this song painted on it.
I mean, this is just...
I don't even know how long it's been.
It seems like it was just yesterday with this,
where I,
I was at work.
It was really early in the morning,
probably seven 30,
eight o'clock.
There was only one other person in the office at the time.
And my phone buzzed,
uh,
with a number of notifications.
And it said that Gord Downie lead singer of the tragic layup had passed away.
Um,
yeah.
And I sat, sat there and cried at my computer
and have cried numerous times since.
This guy was a legend
and someone that I think a lot of us miss every day.
I recently re-listened to the recording I did that morning.
Yeah, I'm looking over there because the Jenny Wenjack.
I have that picture in my basement too.
And that morning that you're describing there
when we learned Gord had passed away,
I came down here and I recorded.
I played some hip songs and just unscripted talking from my heart.
I think I called it for Gord.
I listened to that.
And I re-listened to it for the first time since I recorded it.
I re-listened to it like recently.
And it's kind of a, it takes you right back to that moment and what you're feeling at that moment.
And like yourself, I, but unlike yourself, I never cry when celebrities die.
But you do.
You've made a habit of it recently.
Yeah, I have.
There's been a few.
So that was an example where I cried when Gordani died.
And I don't think I've ever cried for a death of somebody I never met.
I think I remember...
I'm pretty sure I messaged you as well.
It just...
Yeah.
There was a good decade in my life, Mike, where every single debaucherous summer at
someone's cottage that this band was literally the soundtrack.
It would, you would, if the summertime meant you would play tragically hip on repeat, like
sometimes it wasn't even different albums.
It was the same album over and over and over again. Like apples whatever yeah it was just all that you played you're at the
cottage you pop open a beer you're in the water and tragically hip is just there they were just
there and and they still are but it's different agreed elvis well said the inspiration by the way this is the saddest
fest of this episode ever
it really is sad
I almost feel bad about it but maybe
next year
fuck you Christmas
it's the perfect antidote
so I'm closing with a song that kind of inspired
this whole thing which is Tom
Waits do you have any thoughts, which is Tom Waits.
Do you have any thoughts or feelings about Tom Waits?
Are you indifferent to Tom Waits?
I worked at a radio station where people loved Tom Waits.
He was a legend.
People loved Tom Waits.
And I've grown to appreciate Tom Waits,
but I don't have the same level of passion as the people I used to work with.
So what we're listening to is a song I think is probably the saddest Christmas song.
There's a lot of melancholy Christmas songs actually.
The best Christmas songs, I know you hate Christmas
but the best Christmas songs are melancholy.
Like I'll Be Home for Christmas or whatever.
The best ones are very melancholy.
And this song is called
I've got to get this name right.
Christmas Card
from a Hooker in Minneapolis.
Nice.
And Tom Waits is kind of reading the letter.
Charlie, I'm pregnant is how it starts here.
So it's really like a sad, melancholy Christmas.
I really like this Christmas song.
I don't like very many Christmas songs, but I like this one.
Of course, I like the Pogues.
I like a few Christmas songs but there's
a quote from Tom Waits that kind of inspired this whole thing so it all kind of started with Purple
Mountains I can't get enough of Purple Mountains and every song reads to me like a suicide note
and I really like this album this is probably my favorite I haven't listened to a lot of new music
but it's my favorite album of 2019 I only learned it existed because Mark Weisblatt told me David Berman had taken his own life.
Tragically,
sadly.
Now,
uh,
this song by Tom Waits,
Tom Waits said,
I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.
This is a quote from Tom Waits.
And that's the quote.
I think I I'm having difficulty articulating any of this,
but Tom Waits said it all there in one sentence.
I like,
like Tom Waits. I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things like this song christmas card from a hooker in minneapolis if you ever uh want to like like
i know you hate all things christmas what are the hookers in minneapolis like every city's got
hookers yeah of course but i mean But I mean, like, Minneapolis.
Like, I can't imagine the talent there.
They just wear more clothes.
It's cold.
Yeah.
No offense to Minneapolis, but I'm not going to Minneapolis for a hooker.
But you might be in Minneapolis for work purposes and then you need a hooker.
I can't imagine the talent there is all that high.
But hey.
Well, in the song, he knocks up that hooker.
He knocks up the hooker in Minneapolis and she's pregnant with his baby.
So,
thank you everyone
for,
it's not my final episode
of 2019,
but it's a good opportunity.
I have Don Ferguson
coming in.
Actually,
Don Ferguson
and Mark Weisblatt
are the last,
they're the last two episodes
of 2019.
Don Ferguson,
do you know who Don Ferguson is?
Yes.
You're going to take a break?
You're actually going to give yourself
a little bit of a rest?
Well, I don't record again
until Friday
with Don Ferguson
from Air Farce.
Good.
They're done.
I know.
It's sad.
This year,
and this is what we're talking about.
And wasn't it
unceremoniously cancelled as well?
But it hasn't aired yet.
So it still airs on the 30th, I think.
It's a New Year's Eve special that's not on New Year's Eve, I noticed.
That's very CBC.
But CBC has decided to move on from Air Force,
and I'm going to talk about this with John Ferguson.
I can't imagine why.
No, I'm saying that seriously.
I can't tell if you're joking.
A, the content is funny, and B, it's Canadian.
Unless it became a cost issue.
But I can't imagine why after all these years,
it would suddenly become more,
the Sean Majumber suddenly wants like a million dollars.
Isn't that guy from This Hour is 22 Minutes?
Whatever.
They're different shows.
But I mean, okay, but it's same,
like I can't imagine these folks are asking for huge paydays.
I'm with you, okay.
You know what I mean?
So, Don Ferguson is Friday.
Mark Wiseblood has to do his yearly recap, which is going to be be amazing on the 30th of december and that'll be it for 2019 so i just want to say
thank you to everyone who listened to an episode of toronto mic in 2019 uh fantastic to have your
support thank you to anyone who came to a tmlx event we had three of them in 2019 we only had
two in 2018 you so we have four next year?
Maybe, because I got a sticker you,
and then we're going to come back to Great Lakes Brewery.
And remember, Anthony wants every December at Palma's Kitchen.
I'm excited.
So this is exciting stuff.
And what else is there?
I want to say thank you to you, Elvis,
for making the trek here for Festivus.
It wouldn't be Festivus without you.
I love you, man.
This was great to see you.
People love your laugh.
So unfortunately,
this was a sad episode.
There wasn't much laughter.
I think I laughed out loud one time.
I think I did. Only once.
That's going to upset Beats.
I love you too,
man.
Thank you for having me every Festivus.
This is definitely part of the tradition.
I don't know what this is.
I'm giving you something now.
So those who aren't watching on Periscope,
I've given Elvis something. Let me tell you what that is. I'm giving you something now. So those who aren't watching on Periscope, I've given Elvis something.
Let me tell you what that is.
Okay.
Yeah.
That is from the Electric City Candle Company.
It was created to provide learning opportunities
for children and adults with special needs.
So those are candles in there
that have aromatic seasonal scents.
They were handpicked by the special needs adults for your enjoyment. They made these candles. They handpicked seasonal scents. They were handpicked by the special needs adults
for your enjoyment.
They made these candles, they handpicked these scents,
and 100% of the sales go directly back to the organization
and shining a light on special needs.
They play hockey too.
So if you want to buy these candles
and help out these special needs adults,
electriccitycandles.com.
And if you want to learn more about the special needs hockey league,
go to electriccityspecialneedshockey.com to learn more.
Well, thank you, Mike.
I want to thank Electric City Candle Company for sending Elvis over some fantastic
candles thank you Mike I appreciate
that so we did good by
some kids
we sent some money to the Daily Bread Food
Bank look at that
and you know if you can be a good person
over this holiday season
remember
your family and friends only
know how much you love them by the
value of the gifts you give them.
So by often by large and make sure you continue to be an asshole on the
roads and in the malls,
fuck you all and to all a good night.
Fuck you all, and to all a good night.
And that brings us to the end of our 562nd show.
You can follow me on Twitter.
I'm at Toronto Mike.
Elvis apparently bailed on Twitter,
but he's still at Oshawa Elvis,
if you want to tag him on something.
Our friends at Great Lakes Brewery are at Great Lakes Beer.
Palma Pasta is at Palma Pasta.
Sticker U is at Sticker U.
Brian Master, you write him at LetsGetYouHome at kw.com.
And Banjo Dunk is at Banjo Dunk with a C.
See you all Friday with Don Ferguson from the Air Force. This podcast has been produced by TMDS and accelerated by Rome Phone. Rome Phone brings
you the most reliable
virtual phone service to run your business and protect your home number from unwanted calls.
Visit RoamPhone.ca to get started. But I'm a much better man for having known you. Oh, you know that's true because everything is coming up rosy and gray.
Yeah, the wind is cold, but the smell of snow won't speed the day.
And your smile is fine, and it's just like mine, and it won't go away.