Toronto Mike'd: The Official Toronto Mike Podcast - Humble and Fred: Toronto Mike'd #531
Episode Date: October 23, 2019Mike chats with Humble and Fred about their podcast journey, the near misses in their terrestrial radio careers, 30 years together and how radio can be fixed....
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Humble and friend, not pathetic, but close.
Welcome to episode 531 of Toronto Mic'd, a weekly podcast about anything and everything.
Proudly brought to you by Great Lakes Brewery, Palma Pasta, StickerU.com, Brian Master from KW Realty, Capadia LLP CPAs, and Pumpkins After Dark.
I'm Mike from TorontoMike.com and joining me this week are two geeks that groove, Humble and Fred.
Welcome, gents.
Hello, Mike. Welcome, gents. Hello, Mike.
Welcome, Howard.
Make up.
I heard on your show somebody told you you look a bit like Larry David now.
Is that the trend you've detected?
I think I've morphed into Larry David.
Well, look at him.
I don't know.
I don't want to make assumptions here.
There's a bit of Larry David going on there.
I think it's just rampant anti-Semitism.
You just think every old Jewish man looks like Larry David.
Yeah, Larry Sanders.
Yeah, there's at least three of you.
But welcome back.
Fred, I heard you comment a few times that what is there new to talk about
because you've been on a few times already.
Exactly.
Like what can be said today
that hasn't already been said
in our 15 previous appearances?
So every episode of Humble and Fred,
no stories get repeated.
No, it's all on repeat.
We haven't, we've been doing,
we've been doing the same show now
over and over again for about four years.
Most people don't even notice.
There are some stories I think I've heard.
I would say I've heard a good dozen times.
No, no, no, no.
You make a good point.
You can never assume in this medium that everybody's heard everything,
even from hour to hour.
You can never make assumptions.
It makes an ass out of the ump.
Well, even when you're doing, listen,
when we did a morning show back in the day,
you might do something between six and seven and bring it back between eight and nine or
six.
Yeah.
Six and seven and bring it back between eight and nine.
Yeah.
Especially in those days before you could kind of, before they packaged it up into a
podcast or some on-demand audio.
We regularly did that.
I mean, we would even like, especially with like parody songs or a goo head episode, we
would run it.
Let's just take that for example.
We would run a new Goo Head at 7.20 one day, 8.20 the next day,
6.20 the third day because that was the only time you could hear it.
Well, we had the data.
People didn't listen for more than 20, 25 minutes at a time.
So something you played between 6 and 7,
you knew
that your later audience wasn't going to hear it,
so you made sure they did. And if they did
hear it, so what? And if they did, they're
obviously a die-hard fan,
so they would enjoy it again. Exactly.
We play Goo Head and people go, I heard that
earlier. Well, you shouldn't have been listening so
long. And that's what's
kind of different about podcasts, I think, because I think
the fans of your podcast,
I think they listen to the whole thing. Like, I don't
think there's any more of that whole, like, I only listen
to 25 minutes. I think your fans
download and listen to the whole kid and
caboodle. Yeah, because they can.
In the old days of radio, they couldn't. You had to
listen live or there was no alternative.
Unless you, you know, taped us on your
cassette machine. Which I'm sure
people did. Or reeled.
Hey, congratulations. Your place looks great. Thank you. Since your last visit, unless you taped us on your cassette machine. Which I'm sure... Or reel-to-reel. Right.
Hey, congratulations.
Your place looks great.
Thank you.
It was since your last visit.
Okay, so I did do a little research here.
It's been a little over a year since your last visit.
What?
Yeah.
So here's the numbers of Humble and Fred
on Toronto Mike together.
Okay, so you've got episode 100, you guys did.
Then you came back for 200.
For some reason, you did not come back for 300.
I think that was a clip show, but you came back for 379.
So now it's 531.
I have a question.
So you haven't gone since 379.
You did 100 shows before we were on one?
Yeah, you went on solo.
No, you came on solo.
Oh, we came on solo, but as Humble and Fred.
Humble and Fred coming on together. Your first appearance was episode 100.
Oh, isn't that weird?
I keep great notes.
I'm a natural born archivist, you know.
I'm the guy holding on to these old Humble and Fred clips.
Like this one right here.
Humble and Fred.
We ain't got no college.
Started the show yesterday by doing that.
Did you hear the start of yesterday's show?
I literally did like two or three of those jingles.
Did you do that one?
Our wives think we're stupid.
Oh, I have that one here.
We ain't got no college.
Our wives think we're stupid.
Hold on.
Let's hear that one quick.
Oh, I don't know which one's which,
but here, let's try this one.
Humble and Fred,
our wives think we're stupid.
So the original ones were,
we ain't got no college.
Our wives think we're stupid.
Two married guys, but not to each other.
Right.
Wasn't there a pathetic one too? Not pathetic, but close. Oh, right.
Not pathetic, but close. Okay, what's this
one? I didn't name it here.
Humber and Fred.
That's a guy named Amin Batia.
Is that fellow's name?
And what era is that from?
Jamie? No. I don't think so. Well, it did sound
a bit Jamie-esque. Well, maybe it was. sound a bit Jamie-esque. I think that's Jamie.
Maybe it is.
You're just assuming it was a min because it was a Middle Eastern voice?
Yeah.
Well, yeah, actually I am because I think that predates Jamie.
I only say that because that's from the same time as the other ones that Mike played.
You couldn't run that now.
Somebody would find a problem with that one.
Why, Fred?
Because, first of all,
I didn't even know there was an accent on that.
I just thought it was some silly way of singing or whatever.
Oh, you didn't get the impression that was Middle Eastern?
Because he's so woke, he doesn't even hear accents.
You didn't get the image of a snake
coming out of a jug or something?
Fred, you and I have something in common.
We're both married to women of color.
All right.
Move on.
Hold on here.
What did I say?
Humble and fresh.
Well, yeah, you can hear that.
It's having a Middle Eastern vibe to it, even though it's as woke as you are.
Okay, like a yogi.
Yeah.
No, he doesn't hear that.
I hear it a bit.
He's too cool.
He's too evolved.
Yeah.
He's very woke. And also, we don't know who's doing doesn't hear that. I hear it a bit. He's too cool. He's too evolved. Yeah. He's very woke.
And so we don't know who's doing that, if that's a person of Indian descent.
Well, the person that I think it is, is of Indian descent.
Which would make this A-OK, right?
You have license.
But hey.
Yeah.
What, Fred?
You exhaust me.
Go ahead.
I don't want to talk about that.
Go ahead.
Look at this.
Already off the top.
I don't even know what I said to upset you.
But I do think that's true.
You've upset Fred.
I mean, if you did the indian accent right uh people might complain but if
right if an indian does the indian accent i don't think but mike how would the listener know when
they heard that whether it was an indian or not would we have to email them or talk how what would
we do that's my point we don't we don't have this being recorded on some kind of video yeah we live
stream on periscope so nice people some people will watch what we live stream on Periscope. Oh, nice. Some people will watch us take the key.
What do you get on Periscope in terms of numbers?
It really depends.
Like when Leo Roudens came on, it was like 3,000 people.
But my last episode was like 500 people.
So it really depends on the name recognition.
Should we be on Periscope instead of Twitch?
Well, do you want to talk about Twitch?
Because I understood the reason you're on Twitch,
because it was made very clear to me by Don Collins,
is that you make money on Twitch.
I don't make money on Periscope. Yeah, well, we don't
make money on Twitch yet either, so.
Just explain that to me. When Leo
Routens comes in, obviously
you get a pop because of his name and his
profile. How does that happen?
Through him distributing
the information that he's going to be on it?
No, it's primarily
because Twitter owns Periscope.
And when I go live on Periscope,
it automatically tweets the link.
And really, that's the key.
And that happened to be a holiday
Monday, I believe, like in the morning, which I think
was interesting that people weren't...
It was easier for people to peek in.
And a key to that episode, which is why it's an outlier,
it was in the heat of Raptor
Mania.
Like this was after the double overtime win against the Bucs.
So it was really like a perfect storm, if you will.
And I think a lot of people wanted to see if Leo would hit his head on my ceiling.
Six foot seven.
My God, that's his waist.
But he made an excellent point, which I've never forgot,
which is that, you know, Fred, you and I, we aren't used to watching our head.
And you, Howard, you're a bit taller than us, uh you're not used to watching your head all the time leo is always watching his head that makes sense so he doesn't get tripped up that's
interesting too because like you know we you know i'm around six feet i don't know what you guys are
but we don't really know what it's like going through life at six seven and you're always i
golf with one guy's about six four six five and he is you just figure
it's a whole other whole other thing to be aware of that most of us don't have to go through getting
in a car getting in a bed at a hotel but you're constantly going through life allowing for the
fact that you're a foot taller than most people if i have a restless night so to speak or whatever
and i wake up and then my feet are hanging off the end of the bed
i hate that feeling and i can't imagine your whole life is your feet hanging off the bed or you got
to be you know you got to pull your knees up yeah or every time every time you go in a car you got
to adjust the seat it's and if you're leo you're on the road a lot right because he played in the
nba and he's always at rapture games on the road so you'd be in hotel rooms a lot like there's
special hotel rooms for tall people.
That's what I was thinking of.
Those guys have to all stay in special rooms.
Now, Leo made reference to something last night.
Was he a member of the 76ers when they won the NBA championship?
Oh, I didn't think that was true.
Well, because he said something last night like,
hey, I know what it's like.
I've been there when I was in Philadelphia.
Okay, I don't recall
the 76ers winning an NBA championship
when Leo was there because it was well before
his idolization. Was he a starter or was he like the
seventh man? No, he was not a starter.
And he only had a short career. He had some
injuries. It's a very, very short NBA career.
What I love about the NBA is you can be the sixth,
seventh, and eighth man and still make
four or five million. You
barely even play. You're just one of those guys that high high five the other guys when they come off the court and throw
on the towel and stuff but you know you only got 15 people really like so i guess it's just a matter
of the fact that supply and demand there's so few uh spots i guess that drives up the price i don't
know because maybe it's not the sixth man's a superstar but the 11th man isn't as well they
have tv contracts they have small rosters.
A billion dollars in China?
That's right.
They have worldwide merchandising.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Kyle Lowry just signed one year $31 million.
And what?
And Spicy P, what did he get?
$140 for four years or something?
Yeah, but what a game he had yesterday.
Spicy P got some money?
Yeah, Spicy P.
Oh, like it's ridiculous.
Like four years, $130 million or something.
Now, gents.
So this is it?
$531,000, huh?
$531,000.
All right.
And I'm glad you came back.
And I know Fred's like,
what's the point?
We've been on 100 times.
But I appreciate you coming in.
It's been over a year.
Let's catch up.
So on that note, yeah?
One thing I will say,
it's just traditionally
when I frequent your place,
your audience or listeners,
they don't seem to be big fans of ours.
And I just wonder why you'd want to keep having us back.
All of them,
Fred,
all of them.
I get that.
They're not big fans of ours.
That part's understandable.
It's the vocal.
No,
I'm being honest.
And I'm being honest that the people who like you maybe aren't as loud and
aggressive as the people who hate you.
Like,
I think it's just, it looks like they all hate you.
It's not true.
I have, I know, I know from the events that there are, you know,
a lot of people who listen to both of our shows.
Like, so there's definitely going to be a lot of people who like Humble and Fred
and like Toronto Mike, and they're probably really excited.
Like, it's like a crossover episode.
Like, it's like they get to hear Humble and Fred.
It's like a crossover.
Like when, yeah, like when Mork and Mindy are on like,
I was thinking more like when all in the family went to visit.
Well,
the Jeffersons.
The Jeffersons.
So this is,
you know,
or was it,
I think different strokes.
And then isn't that related to facts of life?
I don't know.
I get confused,
but okay,
let's do a little catch up here since the last time you were on.
So the last time you came on,
you were,
I believe you were just starting at 820.
So tell us all, you're still. So the last time you came on, I believe you were just starting at 8.20. So tell us
all, you're still live on
8.20 every morning. Yes, we are.
So you're not just a podcast.
See, this is just a podcast. We're not live.
Oh, we're live on Periscope, but we're not live at any radio
station. But you are the morning show for a
Hamilton radio station.
Yes. What's your question?
No. What's my question?
No. We're catching up. No, not why. He's so defensive over No. That's my question. No. We're catching up.
No, not why.
He's so defensive over here.
No, I'm not.
Howard, what?
I'm sorry.
I just heard my name for the first time.
What?
All right.
I was waiting for a question there.
I'm sorry.
No, this is more to let the listeners know that you're wrong.
Yes, we're on a bell station.
We signed the deal.
We got let go by Sirius in the spring of 2018,
but we had been speaking,
and I think we've mentioned this,
we had started speaking with the people at Bell in February,
and we didn't really have any inkling at that time
that we were going to get canned or whatever, not renewed.
But we did think that maybe this might be a better place for us because
well it's for a lot of reasons it was the fact that satellite really didn't do much for us it
was great it was fun being able to speak to people in the states and that was a bit of a you know one
of those canadian things where you're excited that somebody from georgia thinks you're good and but
but we started talking to those guys and then when the deal expired with Sirius
we got Sirius talking to the people at Bell
and it all got
put together by a guy named Mike Neighbors
who has just been so good to us
now it's not
authentic, we're not getting paid anything
but it's a great way to
sell some advertising, it's a great way to
have people, potential advertisers
can just turn the radio on locally and hear us.
And it's just kind of fun.
There is something you're,
you know,
doing this podcast in your basement.
It's great,
but there's an element to being alive because I'm doing it in my basement
too.
There's an element to the live thing that does something different to you as
a broadcaster.
I think,
you know,
there's an urgency to it. That isn't quite the same as when you're just doing the,
because we did just the podcast, as you know, for some time.
Go ahead, Fred.
No, what I was going to say is a big part of this business still is accessibility.
And podcasts play into this as well.
When you're on SiriusXM and you tell people and they're not a subscriber they
lose all hope of listening to you or you got to hope they're going to get a subscription just
because of you and some people did most don't because they just forget about it when they leave
the room right the one thing about 820 it gives us neat accessibility to a live audience with one
push of a button on a dashboard.
And that's why radio is still surviving because it's very accessible,
even more so than podcasts, because even a podcast in your car,
you have to program it and Bluetooth it.
You know what I'm saying? But that just one button hit really helps us distribute the show live.
And therefore people might listen to the podcast as a result of that.
And of course by
its nature a podcast is not live so that's right you know breaking news and things like that
i'll tell you at seven at 659 you know 45 every morning it's not the same as it was when we were
doing like the edge but there is definitely a different you know it gets my attention in a different way and
it does him as well we're just you know it's and it's because it's kind of been our lives
for most of our adult life is to be sort of in not urgency but sort of a little bit excited about
this thing is going to start it and now we're starting and then it ends at some point yeah
it's exciting and look at it from this standpoint if there's people in the gta because it's a huge signal it really is are in the golden horseshoe
and they hear the hummel and fred show and they're like most commuters they could only listen for 20
25 minutes they might think i really enjoyed that oh i can listen to that whole show today
just by doing this so again it's accessibility and it opens
another door for us. Okay. A little rapid fire catch up beyond the 820 news. How is your gut
humble? You have gut issues? I have gut erosions. I have gastric erosions, you know, as you do when
you get to be. But last time you were on, you told us all that you had gout. I did not have gout.
Right. No. And I think I spent on the recording. No, that was wishful thinking.
Yeah, I was hoping. I was crossing
my fingers. So please let it be gout. If not
gout, scurvy.
Something I can talk about. So I just wonder if this is doctor
diagnosed or how? No, no. I
had to go to the hospital. I've had seven
different doctors examine
me in the last six weeks. So tell
us what the diagnosis is.
I have over consumed anti-inflammatory medication
for many years, from what I understand.
And that's what I'm saying.
I knew I was doing that,
but I didn't realize the problems it was causing me.
So I have something called a sliding hiatal hernia
and gastric erosions.
I will say this, though.
I've been on the same medication now for about four weeks.
And most days, not a couple moments in every day,
but most days I don't really think about it.
This doesn't kill you or anything.
It just makes your life annoying?
Like, I need to know how serious this is.
Should I start my obituary recording?
What's going on?
I don't know.
I mean, listen, I've had a heart test
and I had an echocardiogram
and I had a couple of different ultrasounds.
So enough people thought I was somewhat serious,
but like I said.
They're all negative.
Most days now, I had a couple moments yesterday
after we ate that I can sort of feel it,
but it's fine.
And golf is still, you're quite the golfer.
I think people know that,
but you like, you take it very seriously
and you do real tournaments and things. Well, people know that, but you take it very seriously and you do
real tournaments. Well, I really think of golf as my
main job every day
is to work on my golf game.
It's been good. Do you want to do a little
bragging? I had my best
season ever as
an amateur golfer.
And what
number are you in this country as an amateur
senior? In the province of Ontario, the engine of the country.
Yes.
I am ranked 26th as a senior amateur,
and I'm ranked 72nd amongst all men 25 and over.
Well, that's amazing.
That's amazing.
I think that's pretty kick-ass, and congrats on that.
That's pretty cool.
What do you think of that? I think it's great.-ass, and congrats on that. That's pretty cool. What do you think of that?
I think it's great.
He's my student now.
I took him out about three weeks ago, three Mondays ago.
Just the two of us went out.
What's Fred ranked?
Fred ranks.
He's rank.
I rank.
I stink.
I will say this.
No, it's amazing what you have achieved that way.
Fred's golf game is pretty good.
We played a couple times this summer,
but I had asked him,
I said, listen, one day just you and me should go
and we can kind of hang out
and talk a little bit about what you're doing
and have some fun.
And he's right here, so I'll talk about it.
But we went out on a Monday a few weeks ago,
very beautiful day.
And I got him hitting the ball so good
over the course of the afternoon.
Like I wasn't much because he's pretty coordinated,
but it's a point where you can see you enjoy it better now a little bit.
Oh yeah.
But it's like anything else.
I gotta,
I need to golf more.
By the way,
the other day,
I think I shot 48 or something,
47 on the front nine at Royal Woodbine but that's it's a good score yeah i love
that but the second half the second nine is a lot more challenging yes more water more sand brick
wall like stone walls so it ate me up and i ended up with like a 99 but did you like the planes
landing uh to an extent i love that no i No, I know, but it's sort of...
It's right on the flight path at Pearson.
It's wild.
Do people swear on your show?
Yep.
You can swear.
I don't want to swear.
That's the joy of me not being on 820.
I swore too much in the podcast.
But you know, I could...
The front nine, I could sort of maneuver around,
but that back nine, it was like a little too much for me,
but it made me think,
I want to go back there because I might play again
a little differently based on playing safe, like you've told me, I want to go back there because I might play again a little differently
based on playing safe
like you've told me.
I'm sorry,
this has turned into swing vault.
We're going to do
one more catch up with Howard
before I turn to you, Freddie.
No, you can leave me out of this.
No, it's more of a,
we want to humanize you, right?
It's my job.
I need to humanize you.
Is that what you do?
You're on Real Talk?
Well, Real Talk will become sure.
Now, your oldest turns 25.
Tomorrow. Like that's a mile, I think that's a significant milestone. on Real Talk? Well, Real Talk will become sure. Now, your oldest turns 25.
Tomorrow.
Like that's a mile.
I think that's a significant milestone.
It's 25.
It's a full adult.
No debate about it.
Oh, no, no.
She's fully adult.
Yeah, it's weird because I have a,
Dan Duran brought a picture
of me putting my,
I just have my hand on Charlie
in the hospital.
Like it's crazy to me.
Well, you've gone through this and you're going through it with kids it's like you know i i know it's cliche and it's a hack thing to say but the days are long but the years are short
and i can't believe that 25 years have happened like that i mean how old are your your oldest
he's turning 18 in january when we you, our kids were all babies. Yeah.
Well, the first time I ever came to your house,
when you were still with the old missus.
Wife one, yes.
Wife one.
Wife 1.0. As you were, yeah.
That's right.
What year would that have been?
2007 or 6?
Yeah, about 6.
I'd say 2006.
So I had like an 8-year-old and an 11-year-old.
I had a 4-year-old and a 2-year-old.
Yeah, it's crazy.
I think the first time you came.
Oh, I still do.
I think the first time you came to my house, Mike,
was 2006.
Probably.
I remember Billy was there.
So when did Billy pass?
I know Billy's...
2008.
2008.
So I remember Billy was there.
And yeah, I remember we...
So yeah, it's a milestone and she's doing great.
And although I did...
It made me laugh the other day
because I was talking to her sister
and I was trying to be like,
oh, Spenny, you know,
you're going to have a significant birthday too coming up. She goes, what are you talking about? I said, you're laugh the other day. Cause I was talking to her sister and I was trying to be like, Oh, Spani, you know, you're,
you're going to have a significant birthday too coming up.
She says,
what are you talking about?
I said,
you're turning 21 in February.
She goes,
yeah,
last February.
Like I completely,
and I wasn't,
I wasn't doing a dad bit.
I forgot.
Well, I get my names mixed up all the time.
Cause I have a Jarvis and a James and I have a Michelle and a Morgan.
And I have this weird thing where I'm with the five-year-old and I forget,
I know he's Jarvis, of course, but my, I remember doing the same stuff with James when he was five. And I have this weird thing where I'm with the five-year-old and I forget, I know he's Jarvis,
of course,
but my,
I remember doing the same stuff with James when he was five and I'll say,
James,
like James,
the Leafs game.
And I'll be,
I mean,
Jarvis.
And I do it too.
If the girl too,
because a little cute little Morgan reminds me so much of three-year-old
Michelle,
which is now going back to all your kids now are what?
It's almost 18,
15 for Michelle, five for jarvis
and three for morgan like that's something so you basically have two families because it's not
never say it that way but yeah i want to have you know what i mean it's what do you call it
a split couplets uh like two from marriage one two from marriage two so it's just
to me i find that's overwhelming and then you have four kids that age spread oh yeah well i go from
talking about what university is james going to go to next year and when is he going to get that
next tier of his driver's license like that's the convo i'll have no i don't turn around and i'll be
like helping uh morgan comb the hair of her doll or whatever well this is what i mean and you know you're building your
own business here and yeah i don't know how you do i'll say this i'll say this of course i thought
it was done two kids done no more whatever and then when you know circumstance you know the
circumstances you get married to somebody who says to you uh i would like to have i love my
stepchildren but i like children my own so you basically agree to have another child with your new wife, right? So she can have one of her
own. You have a boy. And then she comes to you shortly thereafter and says, I'd like to have
another one. And then you basically say, okay, you can have another one. And next thing you know,
you have four kids. So it's not like you plan it on the board like this, but then, but then here's
the key. You think, oh, you're done at two, but then you have two more, and you
cannot imagine life without all four of them.
I cannot imagine life without Morgan.
No, I get that, but as a fiscal conservative,
I just think, what does that cost?
Money! I know!
You're having family. I can't even think
about it. It's expensive, but you can't worry about that.
You can't create the money. You know what I mean?
It's like you have four kids. I'm talking about Toronto Mike Digital Services.
It's creating quite a bit of money. You go out you uh yeah you generate you make some uh you make money
my dad used to have the same thing i have two older brothers david steven and howard and he
would literally at every at some point in life he would go through the roster before he gave me go
david steven right and what gets me though is that mistake i made of boys both start with j
and the girls both start with m and then it rolls off the tongue
with the other name.
I feel like I might do better
if I had done that
with Dave and Steve and Howard.
Different consonants
to start these names.
All right, Fred.
First of all,
congrats to Charlie on turning 25.
Yes, we were at her party
Friday night.
It was wonderful.
I didn't get an invitation.
I'm just kidding.
She's such a sweet,
successful...
That would have been odd.
Hey, Charlie, look.
Toronto Mike is here.
Remember me?
You know what she would have said?
She would have been thrilled.
I do see her
at the Odd, Humble, and Fred event.
She would have said,
oh, good, I'm podcast
number 527, I guess.
Exactly.
No, Charlie hasn't
made a debut yet.
But Fred,
congrats to your wife, right?
Why?
Did she retire?
Oh, she retired, yes.
June 30th, yes.
Why?
Why? Why? How dare you? Oh, she retired, yes. June 30th, yes. Why? Why?
Why?
How dare you?
So that's cool.
Does that change anything?
Does it have you planning to, I don't know, leave Canada during the winters?
We start having dinner at 2 p.m. in the afternoon.
Do you have plans to live your winters in Florida or something?
A portion.
Not Florida, necessarily.
Summer warm?
This year, we're going away for the entire month of February
and that may stretch. You know, I'm in
my 64th year. Plans
are to be made, but still enjoying the
Humble and Fred thing immensely. What do you mean plans
to be stretched? How much are you going to take
March as well?
Well, we'll see. Are you going to Skype it
or are you going to just take a leave?
Are you serious? Are you going to take March off? I don't know.
What do you mean you don't know?
If I can broadcast remotely. How often
have you said to me, I don't give a fuck if you
do it from your asshole.
If you're happy. First of all,
if that's what I sound like, please shoot me right now.
I don't give a fuck if you dig a dig
a microphone, shove it up your
asshole and then fucking put it on an antenna.
You've said to me every time. I don't care
where you do the show from.
If he Skypes in, you don't care where you do the show from. Just go and do it.
If he Skypes in, you don't care where he is.
I think it's great.
Listen, every moment that this fellow
continues to want to work in this organization
is a bonus.
So if he wants to take two fucking months this winter,
Mike, why are you giving him shit?
No, no, I may stretch that a bit,
but the thing is,
I don't think I'd ever get my wife away for that long with grandkids and everything.
Right.
But anyway, part of the plans are, yeah,
in the winter now, maybe take a break from the winter.
Yeah.
Cool.
Yeah, go ahead.
No, and there's a different dynamic in the house.
Every day, you know, for 30 some odd years,
I would get home at 10, 10, 30,
and that's the way my life has always been.
And Delise was always at work.
Right.
Well, now when I arrive home,
she's home every day.
So it's a different dynamic.
It's great.
It's different.
That's my friend now
who drops off at the bar
before he goes home.
Afternoon delight.
You know what I'm talking about.
Hashtag retirement sex boyfriend.
But it is different
because the house was all mine
until like 5.30, 6 o'clock.
Now it's not.
See, what a great marriage it's been
until right now
and now that you're going to be
around each other so much. All of a sudden, you know, you know she's going to be like he can't come home and
put on his party dress anymore you know it does have challenges i mean you can't two people can't
see each other for three or four hours a day for 30 years and then all of a sudden you see each
other for 12 hours a day there are challenges attached so what do you do well it's just the
way you handle it you just what you think and what how you so what do you guys do like in the afternoon like you go
off and do your own thing and she's in the kitchen making lemon squares she made she made beautiful
lemon squares for charlie's maybe charlie i do a lot of stuff outside but in the winter that's
going to be different you know she likes to go and browse around winters and
stuff like that where she used to be doesn't and where she used to be able to go around winters
and buy things now she has to pull that back a bit so it's you know you you you evolve well good
luck good luck to to delise i think we're all praying for her this is gonna be so fascinating
to the people oh delise Delise's retirement story.
Hold on.
We're rapid fire update real quick.
So, and are your prostates okay?
Last time you were in,
you had a bag attached to you.
Yes, I did actually.
I had a...
Mr. Squishy.
I had a...
I had...
What did you call it?
It was called...
Colostomy?
No, it was another kind of bag.
Anyway.
Yeah, I had...
The urine bag.
Is that what it is for urine?
Yeah, piss bag. there was a name for it
mike richards has a call on mike's got the colostomy bag i called it piss bag but anyway
yeah i was sitting here and i had a rubber tube rammed up my urethra and it freely allowed urine
to go into this bag while i gave my bladder a rest anyway to make a long story short you ask tomorrow um i go back to
the urologist it's one year later and i'm gonna have a i've done my psa i'll get the results and
i guess he'll put me through a little test to see if i'm draining properly which i'm convinced i am
because my life has completely changed and uh yeah that's where i'm at with that it's all good
it's all good that's great news hey brother i had uh my my physical a couple weeks ago and he said my prostate because he went right up
there he fingered my prostate like nice um he said my prostate was great well you're lucky but
yet i still have to get up one time in the middle of the night like i got up this morning
at like 3 30 and i had been drinking a lot of liquid last night but that's why longest but it
was the it was a fiery, aggressive piss.
But it's good that you can do that, right?
Oh, yeah.
Just like Larry David in that episode of Curve.
Remember he had like a horse?
I'm like a horse now.
We're approaching Movember.
Right.
50% of men have prostate issues on some level.
But you mentioned that.
You drank a lot and you had one big pee in the middle of the night that's completely normal turn the clock back for me where some nights i was getting
up four and five times a night that's ridiculous and that urge to pee and not much would come out
and not much would come out yeah you know a friend of ours i'm just fascinated by men that won't go
and get a freaking colonoscopy you're not there yet but you should be at 50 right our boy duran
i was talking to him
i'm like dude how is it you you got to this age without he's never had a colostomy yeah no i mean
a colonoscopy and here's what he said and this is good this will be our november message he said
what i used to say is my doctor because we had the same doctor he says my doctor doesn't want me to
because the psa came back fine and and that test and i go
that's fine psa what's that got to do with your no that whatever the um not the psa the he did
the poop test oh right so he anyway he did his blood work and he and sharif said you don't have
to do it but i told him the story of ann murray browbeating me into getting one in it you should
have it if you're 61 years old you should have had one it's like climate change
even if you don't necessarily believe in it why would why wouldn't you err on the side of but
anyway um that's a good point it it has changed and and i'd like to deliver this message to men
it has changed my life immensely because you slowly go into these prostate problems without
even realizing it's
a problem. Getting up in the middle of the night two, three, four times, you start to think, well,
this can't be right, but you might not address it. The point is, if you have it addressed and
you go through what I did, it can change your life dramatically. I don't get up in the middle
of the night anymore. I don't get up in the morning with that uncomfortable urgency. I can
pee normally. Plus plus diagnosis is another thing
i went to a urologist for five or six seven years and he fucking did nothing and i said finally i
there's got to be more to this i go to a guy and he changes my life so there you go that was the
the thing for you for a long time fred was taking this supplement called salt palmetto
no no well yes you were taking some more uh natural medicine to
try and shrink your prostate no no no no yes and no what no yes salt palmetto you take preventative
to okay i was taking a thing called atovart or right avodart and it's a shitty drug and then
you're on and the guy just kept putting me on it without doing these basic tests.
And it didn't shrink your prostate.
That the last guy did.
Like within minutes, he had me diagnosed.
And a year later, I'm great.
This is good advice.
I have a lot to look forward to.
I can't wait.
Is this the kind of real talk you were hoping for?
Yeah, if it's real, it's real.
Are we delivering?
You're delivering.
Now, you guys have been podcasting for eight years now.
Yeah, just past our anniversary.ing for eight years now. Yeah. It's October 2011. Just past our anniversary.
I was thinking about the different iterations.
So, of course, you've been a podcast for eight years, but there's been these different, like,
I want to say, yeah, iterations, I guess, is a good word.
Like, for example, you were, for a while, you guys were the morning show in Kingston,
Ontario.
People should never forget.
Yeah, people should keep that in mind.
We started in October of 2011, and by the spring of 2012, we had started doing a morning show in Kingston live every morning.
We did it remotely, and then we would, at 9 o'clock,
when the Kingston show went off the air,
we would do a short podcast, about an hour.
And is it fair to say that they hated you in Kingston?
Well, it's the joke.
We just didn't go over well.
It didn't do very well, unfortunately.
But we didn't have enough time.
And that was the only thing about that particular episode
is that they gave us about six months.
They gave us one book.
And unfortunately, it was in a market where they're very,
is the word xenophobic?
Where they're very-
Isolated?
Isolated, right?
And they didn't like the fact that we were from Toronto,
even though we thought we were put on a pretty good show. So that was one
iteration of, that was the
Kingston year. Now, but I will say, though,
that they rejected
a Kingston morning show coming out of Toronto,
but it doesn't sound like Hamilton is
rejecting a, so is it just
Hamilton 2? Completely different. Let me
explain why.
Tell us. No, it's in, Howard
touched on it.
They're far enough away from Toronto,
they don't really get
Toronto radio unless
maybe they stream it,
which we're talking
a few years ago now.
2012, yeah.
It wasn't as popular
as it is now,
that form of listening
to a radio station.
You didn't have all
these apps with all
the stations together.
And if you think
this anti-Toronto
sentiment is just
like out west
and out east, I'm sorry.
It's not far from Toronto because I experienced a little bit of it in Peterborough as well,
as I've told you before.
And it just bothered them that, you know, that's there.
That radio station is theirs.
It's Kingston.
It should be Kingston jocks or the people they know are Kingston people.
And that was, and they just rejected that's there's no getting around it i
remember having a conversation with a reporter from a paper that was telling us about how much
we were hated and i said to him you know it's interesting i said you know it's funny here we
are we're putting on a pretty good show and i said all these people in kingston they watch television
i said do they they don't think that uh the Wire was filmed on Queen Street or whatever the shit is there.
But for some reason, so that was 2012.
And then we lost that gig, went back to doing a podcast from around November, December of 2012 till the spring of 2013.
Right.
Podcast only, went back to recording it around 10.
Then we got the job at Sirius and we went back to doing a morning show right i'm sorry did you know uh five years at serious right five years
of serious that ends last spring and then we've been doing this thing at and we went back to being
a podcast only for a couple months um in uh 80 18 2018 september we started at funny 820 when it
comes to radio ham Hamilton is Toronto.
You know, when they break down the numbers, the ratings,
you know what the most popular station is in Hamilton?
CHF.
Collectively.
Q107.
No, out of tune.
FM.
Out of market tuning.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
About 80% to 90% of their radio listening is out of market.
And where do you think from?
Toronto. Not Buffalo. So that's why. And as far as their radio listening is out of market. And where do you think from? Not Buffalo.
So that's why.
And as far as the radio station is different,
it didn't have a morning show.
It's recorded comedy 24 hours a day.
So for a couple hours a day, we break in and do a live show.
And was there any blowback at all?
Yeah, a little bit.
Okay.
Well, from Hamilton, there's been a couple of little complaints.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
We had a CSBC complaint about something I said.
What was it?
Do you remember?
Broadcast Standards Council.
Of course I do.
I said Bernie Sanders was too Jew-y to be president.
And you were off the hook
because they found out you were Jewish.
I don't know if they did or didn't,
but they sent a note to the Broadcast Council
or whatever saying,
you can't say that.
And I never,
well, I heard it from our boss,
but that was it.
Interesting. Yes, but I think
and that's an example, I don't want to get into a thing with Fred but I think
if Fred says that, there's a
valid complaint and if Howard says that,
it's less so and he has
license to do that. Just like the Seinfeld
bit. Well, yeah, it's like
what, the Seinfeld bit? Yeah, like Wally
converted for the votes. He converted for the
jokes so he could tell Jew jokes.
Yeah.
It's funny.
I had this guy,
I've told the story on the air,
the guy,
I barely know him,
but he's a golf person
and he came up to me
in a parking lot last summer
and he said,
hey,
how's my favorite Jew boy?
And I said,
you really can't say that.
Is he Jewish?
No.
Okay.
I said,
you really can't say that
in 2018.
And then he comes back
with kind of indignity.
He goes,
what are you talking about?
You played a Jew card all the time.
And I said,
well,
a couple of things.
Number one,
it's my card.
Right.
And number two,
you might want to add Jew card to the things you,
maybe want to add Jew card to the things you don't say out loud anymore.
It's a Jew certificate.
Right.
No,
yeah,
you gotta,
yeah.
Anyway,
no,
it's been great.
Hamilton's been great,
even though we don't make any money directly.
It's been...
But you make...
We've gotten some sponsorship.
Yes, okay, sorry.
We have gotten some sponsorship from it, and that's great.
Well, that's our model.
I mean, when you say we make no money, we make money.
Well, I never said that, but...
No, no, but I'm saying Howard said that.
He said we make no money.
When he says that, he means from them.
They don't cut us a paycheck.
However, they give us access to inventory, which we use, and that's how we make no money when he says that he means from them they don't cut us a paycheck however they give us access to inventory which we use and that's how we make money i mean it's been our
model for eight years now excellent no fantastic in fact maybe that's a good segue for me to give
you some uh gifts from sponsors of toronto miked so howard how long have you been sober
uh just it'll be four years in uh two months okay good for you so you
you uh you're not gonna give me any beer but as i discussed i'm gonna give this to you can give me
22 can't i have this beer uh i was planning to give a six pack of we can talk fred i can take
care of you for sure but great lakes brewery no no yeah what's my six pack of beer yeah it's coming
i got uh lots of gifts for you as well okay but f No, no. What's my six pack of beer? Yeah. It's coming. I got lots of gifts
for you as well.
Okay.
But Fred is walking away
with a six pack of,
and you'll love,
you'll love the Cuckpea.
These guys are fantastic.
Fantastic.
It's a great local
family run craft brewery.
They've hosted,
I know I saw Howard at one,
they've hosted the last
four Toronto Mike
listener experiences.
And we're going to have
another one in June 2020,
which I hope you,
once again,
I'll send an invitation and find out. Yeah, be there june 2020 june 2020 come by great
lakes brewery for tmlx whatever that'll be seven when i turn 60 in january i'm saying yes to all
party invitations for the for one year only okay good good i'll get you to all of them then but
there's a couple of these that i really like i like this ipa this ipa oh yeah that's i is really good. Oh, yeah. That's my favorite, actually, is the Octopus Wants to Fight.
I got the sense when I first met you, you weren't really much of a beer drinker.
No, and I'm still not much of a beer drinker, but I definitely...
Do you like the odd one?
I do enjoy the odd beer.
And when you have an odd beer, it's nice to have one as flavorful as this rather than
the traditional...
Right, the IPAs.
No, like the Molson Canadians and all that are...
Right.
No, you're right. And you're right. I definitely don't drink every night or anything, but Friday night, I the Molson Canadians and all that. Right. No, you're right.
I definitely don't drink every night or anything,
but Friday night I'm going out to see a band
and I'll be having a couple of beers.
You'll have a couple of brewskis?
Yep, and I'm walking home.
How's the biking going? How's the cycling?
Every day, man. I know you've given up, I guess.
I never got started.
I got excited for about three weeks.
And then the golf season came. I'm like, no.
I haven't been bugging you about it because I figure it's, you know, you got to golf and
it's your real life.
I have another career.
You want to bank?
Yeah.
I have tried a couple of times.
In fact, this summer, a few times, I went over the handlebars one day.
Eek.
No, I did.
In July, right over the handlebars.
And it was about four weeks before my big trip to the UK.
And I was afraid I separated my shoulder. But that's the one reason i don't do it i'm afraid of falling i'm sorry i just
well you got to know your body and your limits and the play i will say play within them like
clockwork every day i'm out there for 30k a day uh all year round and i almost never take a day
off and sometimes i go longer if i have places to go. I use it as my mode of transportation.
30k. Every single day.
Now have you, has this
because you used to be fat.
Let's be honest. 40 pounds.
You lost 40 pounds? Yeah but I'm not
there. So okay my height I was
186. At my lowest I
was 146. And now I'm right there
at 155 is where I live.
When you came in at 146, you were too skinny.
Well, I don't know about that, but
I'm definitely 10 pounds more now.
So I did the same thing. When I first
stopped drinking, six months, eight months, I lost
30 pounds. And then I went to sort of back
up to about 190. But because of my
recent illness, I've lost
about four or five pounds. And for some reason, I've kept it off.
I'm like 185 now. And I haven't been
regularly in the 180s since my 20s.
How tall are you, Mike?
Five nine.
How tall are you?
You're like five ten.
I'm between five nine, five ten.
Yeah, somewhere in there.
Right.
Definitely tall enough
to hit your head down here.
So what else do I have for you guys?
I have a lasagna from Palma Pasta.
This is a meat lasagna, frozen.
Take that to Brampton with you, Fred.
You can enjoy that tonight or tomorrow.
As you guys know, Palma Pasta,
if you're looking for authentic Italian food,
look no further than Palma Pasta.
They got four locations, three in Mississauga,
one in Oakville.
You can find them at palmapasta.com
and they're on Skip the Dishes.
And this is exciting news
because I'm inviting you both now.
So quickly come up with your excuse why you can't come. i can't make it whatever day it is you don't know
what it is on december 7th which is a saturday not in saturday okay well maybe fred can make it
on december 7th at noon toronto mic listener experience 5 tmlx5 takes place at palmas kitchen
which as you guys know is near mavis and burn and Burnham Thorpe there. And everybody's invited.
We got some great giveaways from Palm Pasta,
some giveaways.
We're going to have beer.
We're going to have-
I love that place, by the way.
At Palma's Kitchen,
the last time I was in there was about a month ago.
And we had,
because Anthony was a,
probably is going to be a sponsor again,
but I had some gift certificates to burn.
I bought a bunch of stuff.
And it's like,
it's amazing how many things,
all your favorite Italian food is on every shelf,
on every aisle.
It's amazing.
But I got a bunch of nitrate-laden meat.
I really enjoyed.
That's good for your gut?
It is.
It's great for my gut.
So you guys got lasagnas from Poma Pasta.
And I know I was on your show recently
and I gave you one,
but here's another Toronto Mike sticker.
Sweet. That's courtesy of
stickeru.com. I'm going to put that on my cell phone.
Do it. And in fact, they got something else
from Capadia that goes on the cell phone too.
Pop socket. So
stickeru.com. Again, we had
the contest that ran and the winner was Bridget
and Mimico and that was chosen by Laura
not by me. I'm not favoring, you know,
you know, Southwest Toronto here. But thank
you stickeru for your partnership
and again
a recent episode
is Andrew Witkin
kicking out the jams
and I highly urge
everyone to check that out
what is this thing for
yeah what is this
that's a pop socket
my wife loves this
okay so
you stick it to the back
of your cell phone
okay
yeah
and then it becomes
like a
like a tripod
it holds up your phone
whenever you want to watch
a video
or look at your
like your phone as a screen
you can use
that as like a, yeah,
it's really convenient.
My wife swears by them. That is actually
courtesy of Capadia LLP
CPAs. Rupesh Capadia
has brought that for you. I had a little chat with
Rupesh on the weekend about the Toronto
Raptors and here is that chat.
Hello, Rupesh. Thanks for being here.
Hey, how are you, Mike?
I'm very happy to be here.
Oh, okay.
No, that was not the chat.
That was Rupesh.
That's a great chat, man.
Why are you playing that right now?
I know.
I see why you're so successful.
Yeah, yeah.
Because of your in-depth interviews.
When I'm with the pros like you guys,
I get nervous, obviously,
and I press the wrong button.
Here's another one.
Rupesh, the Toronto Raptors are the 2019 NBA champions.
Woo-hoo!
You deserve some credit, at least.
You go to the odd game now and then.
Yes, I do.
And I do deserve some credit because that's the only time I win.
And maybe it was I who made them win.
So, yes, I will take all the credit I can get on that.
Any plans to attend another game in 20 years?
Why isn't this guy sponsoring a home game?
I will definitely attend a few games this year as well,
and I would look forward to seeing you there, Mike.
Are you ready to make a prediction?
Do the Raptors repeat as NBA champions?
Well, as an accountant, I never like to make predictions,
but if I have to predict, I would say no.
Is he doing an impression?
So Rupesh Kapadia. He's Middle Eastern, right?
Or you shouldn't be doing that voice. He's from India.
He's born and raised in India. And he's the
rock star accountant who sees beyond the numbers.
And if you want a free consultation to ask Rupesh
anything you like, hook me up.
Let me know and I'll hook you up with Rupesh.
He's a real solid guy. And I've got a lot of great
answers to listener questions I'll be
playing on future episodes. So, that's
Rupesh Kapadia, the rock star accountant.
Kapadia, by the way, sounds like
something they would serve at Palm of Passa, but they do not.
Kapadia!
We had a great debate on how to say the name,
Kapadia or Kapadia. It is actually
Kapadia. So, let's hear
from Brian Master. Do you guys know Brian Master?
He's a long-time radio
veteran in this market. I know Brian Master.
I love him.
Used to be at Chum FM.
Yes.
With Marsden and Pete and Geats.
Is he a sponsor of your show?
Oh, he was, yeah.
I think in the 70s.
I don't think he was ever in Brampton.
No.
No, we're talking about Chum FM.
Chum FM was never in Brampton.
Before they came to Brampton, yes.
And we're going to hear him.
Is he a sponsor?
Was Chum FM ever in Brampton?
No.
Let's see if and why.
Wait, what are you talking about?
No, I'm saying before Pete and Geats came to Brampton, they he a sponsor? Was Chum FM ever in Brampton? No. Let's see if and why. Wait a minute. I'm saying before
Pete and Geetz came to Brampton,
they worked with Brian Master at Chum FM.
I have a question. Is he a sponsor of your show?
Brian Master? I've just asked that
three times now. I'm just curious.
Why are you playing a clip of Brian Master?
We're going to play a clip of Brian.
You guys break down for
sponsor mentions
eight times in a row.
We're breaking down right now. Let's hear from Brian and then we'll pick up our conversation. break down for like uh sponsor mentions like eight times we break down over everything we're
breaking our lives all right we're breaking down right now let's hear from brian and then we'll
pick up our conversation hi it's brian master sales representative with keller williams to
realty solutions brokerage i like working by referral i love working with people finding out
what they need and uh where they want to go so every month they put out an item of value called
the client appreciation program and this is really great material. It's all about, well, for one thing, the way the real estate market is,
but other things like, well, this month is how to turn your home into a smart home. We've also
had things about how to throw a party on a budget, some travel tips. It's really great stuff. And it
comes out once a month called the Client Appreciation Program. I'd love to get you on it. It's easy to do. Send me an email to letsgetyouhomeatkw.com.
And I'll send that out once a month via snail mail
and follow it up with an email
that's something related to the item of value.
You can't miss.
It's great information.
It's something you can share with your friends.
I'm Brian Master, sales representative
with Keller Williams Realty Solutions Brokerage.
Thrilled to be on Toronto Mic'd.
So that's Brian Master.
I see what you're doing.
Yeah, well, you guys do it too, right?
Doing commercials.
Yeah, I dig it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, we bake them into the show.
So it's not like you don't.
Oh, where'd you get that idea?
Yeah, well, I got it from Howard Stern, to be honest.
Like he used to do the live reads.
No, exactly.
Okay.
Okay.
Fred's testy today.
No, no. I'm just just can't i have some fun i'm saying actually it's not howard stern that's the way radio used to be done
yeah no offense to you and or him and howard stern but that no no no that's where i
not where it was invented that started like in the 30s. In fact, when I first started in radio,
we were still reading live commercials.
Horribly, mind you, but still trying.
They should still do it.
I think it's, otherwise people just turn the channel,
I think, when you stop down.
That's the beauty of it.
Absolutely.
I'm not being tested.
I'm just having some fun.
I know, I know, Fred.
Always a pleasure to have you on Toronto Mike, for sure.
In fact, this might help your grandkids.
How old are your grandkids now?
Johnny boy will be seven and May will be five very soon.
Wow.
I know what that's like.
Now, they live very close to Milton.
Is that fair to say?
Georgetown.
That's close to Milton, right?
North of Milton, yes.
Okay.
The reason I'm asking that is not so I can stock them.
It's so that I can tell you what I'm giving you,
and Howard might be able to send his your way,
and then you'd have enough to bring both.
I'm already giving him my beer.
Can I not keep this?
No, it's up to you.
Each of you are getting two free tickets to Pumpkins After Dark.
Pumpkins After Dark is 5,000 hand-carved pumpkins
that illuminate the skies of Country Heritage Park in Milton
until November 3rd.
So you've got the 5,000 pumpkins,
you've got sculptures, there's sound.
Everyone who's gone using the promo code Pumpkin Mike
because any listener who uses the promo code Pumpkin Mike
saves 10% right now.
You just go to pumpkinsafterdark.com.
You've got to hurry up because Halloween is coming.
Now, Fred and Humble, you each get
two tickets to this for free
and I'll email you the PDF files.
And yeah, maybe
Humble, Fred, and the two grandkids go
to this one. Well, that would be nice because
I've actually never met
the grandkids. Really?
Yeah. I met them once.
One time in five years.
I met John when May was born.
So when is that?
Five years ago?
They're of an age now that maybe they can come in one morning
when they're not at school.
Yeah, what the fuck?
They could.
Yeah, I think.
But I will happily pass my passes to Pumpkin Mike,
the Pumpkin Mike Festival.
Pumpkin Mike is the 10% promo code.
Well, whatever. I'm going to pass it on.
I know there's some people in Milton
that have children.
I could give them to them.
I just want to keep my beer.
I want you to give me my beer so I can take it
to the beer store and get some rebates.
Do you still, yeah, 10% or something?
Okay. So, the show,
let me just ask a little update
on some of the cast members.
We talked about,
you've been going eight years now,
but how's Phil doing?
Phil has been there
for almost eight years.
He was there.
Eight years.
He started with us
two weeks after we started.
So he's been with us a while.
He's great.
He's going to Cambodia
in February
and he's going to get his wife
and bring her home
to Canada where she's going to be his wife and bring her home to Canada
where she's going to be.
She got some kind of status,
landed immigrant, I guess.
They're going to be in Canada for a week
and she's got to go back to Cambodia.
Okay.
And they will be moving her
in the fall of 2020, I think.
Well, that's great news for Phil.
It's going to be the best episode of Phil ever.
The best season of Phil is yet to come.
And we've had some great seasons of Phil.
Well, you know what's next?
First comes love, then comes marriage, and then comes...
Phil babies.
Phil babies.
We had this conversation the other day, and I don't know what the number is.
But he's only been in her presence.
Do you want to go 10?
Maybe.
Maybe.
10 days?
No.
10 times in his life.
Okay, 10 times. And they're getting married. Probably less. And 10 10 days? No. 10 times in his life. Okay, 10 times.
And they're getting like.
Probably less.
And 10, that's right.
It might be a strike.
It's just so bizarre for us to relate to.
It's a real cultural thing too.
Because every day we're treated to the ins and outs of what's going on as they prepare
for a wedding.
And it's like, wow, none of this makes sense to us.
But to them, it's like, this is the way you do it.
And it's.
But they're in love.
They're in love.
Well, I would hope so.
Well, they think they're in love at least,
which is half the battle.
Well, that's the thing is, I'm sure they are.
It's not traditional. And he's spent, let's say, six or seven visits,
possibly 30 days, 40 days maybe with her.
So that's fine.
Oh, I wouldn't.
Well, they go, because he goes there for a week at a time.
He's done that three or four times.
Well, whatever it is.
Yeah.
Talks to her every day.
They FaceTime or whatever every day.
And he seems to be happy.
But how do you know a person like in that time frame?
Just think about this.
Your Phil, who I think is turning 30.
He's about 30.
Just 30.
I think he's already turned 30.
He's going to be a, I mean, I don't know know yet maybe i shouldn't say this because who knows what's going
on but uh might be a daddy soon like this there might be he might be a guy it wouldn't surprise
me it might be a one a human baby no if they get pregnant quick it wouldn't surprise me at all
um but you just you just think this girl she lives in in Cambodia and makes next to no money,
but lives apparently a middle-class life there.
Pretty sure, you know, in a climate that she's not used to,
pretty soon she's coming to Canada.
Yeah.
Won't speak the language, won't have a job,
and live in a house with her mother-in-law, her stepfather-in-law,
and two sisters.
Like, it's something that most of us can't relate to but they do it
a bigger achievement with uh phil though is we've talked him into going to a dentist for the first
time in 16 years 16 16 years yes eek that's gonna be a messy first visit that's a major achievement
and i think he's going monday at two yes good. It was very similar to trying to convince Phil
to let us come visit him at his house.
Yeah.
That episode, that season of Phil was pretty good, that one.
That was a few years ago.
But this season of Phil, the dentist visit has just been epic.
The excuses, that's what keeps the show interesting,
for me at least, is the excuses,
the conversations we have with him
about going to the dentist, to me, are gold.
They're gold, Jerry.
And he sounds like he's going Tuesday,
so it sounds like we're going to end the streak here.
Like the first time we said to him,
just make an appointment.
Well, I have to talk to my mother.
Why do you have to talk to your mother?
He's 30 years old.
Yeah.
Well, because she arranges those things well wait a minute uh phil our history with you
is you seem to be the arranger you're the guy that's taking your your mother this place and
your sister daughter's that place and that's funny and i and i said why can't you just phone
the doctor why can't you phone the dentist well we just don't do it that way my mother's got to
make the call and then finally he ended up he ended up doing it anyway if you haven't heard the show in
a while it makes the uh the last couple of months pretty interesting and amanda barker is still uh
is she a producer what's her title yeah she's the we call her the executive producer but she's a
producer she's you know she we get like a couple days a week she'll come in. When one of us is away, she fills in.
She was great the last time Fred was in the UK.
She's good.
She's reliable.
In terms of on air, she's great.
She's on a lot of commercials.
Yeah, she's a very busy actress and performer.
She's a master improviser.
And she's got her own theater show that she's written.
And doing quite nicely.
And her husband, Marco, is just a sweet prince of a man and she's a delight.
Good for Amanda.
Now, Sean Sargent, who actually has appeared in an episode of Toronto Mic because he appeared
at TMLX4, which was, I know people would come and then jump on a mic and have a quick chat
or whatever.
And so we've, listeners of Toronto Mic have heard Sean Sargent, if you listen to TMLX4's episode.
But tell us a little bit.
So Sean, he's there to manage the Twitch, the aforementioned Twitch stream.
Yeah.
Is that what you mean?
He's, yeah.
I mean, originally that, he was just another intern,
and then the Twitch thing came along,
and we just sort of let him take that ball and run with it.
But he's been with us for a couple years, started like everyone else.
He was a Humber student, I think.
And he's very good.
He's very talented.
We listened to some voice work of his yesterday.
You know, he's very talented.
You know, he's got a great little character on our show.
This Twitch thing is a whole other side thing for him but but he's learning a lot learning a lot and
if you listen to him like you were on the show with him i was on his show yeah he does pretty
well you know for a kid from georgetown hasn't a lot of experience his voice sounds very good well
i like the guy like he's just a likable fellow if you will and you root for him because he seems pretty sincere
like there's no errors about him he's just uh just wants to break into a tough industry to break into
and uh now the twitch thing uh we did mention this briefly at the top but i i am because i'm
always curious because of course i heck i could switch to twitch tomorrow uh if somebody could
sell me on it but i uh had this chat with sean but it sounds like
you guys i mean it sounds like after several months of twitching it's not particularly lucrative
like it's a great way for people to see you record live yeah but yeah we've listened we did it since
we sort of started in earnest in february and now it's october and listen it's great for the kid and
we have a loyal crew of people that watch it every day.
But in terms of the monetization of it, we're not making any money off it.
It's costing us money now.
And as guys that own their own business.
How is it costing you money though?
Well, because we have to pay Sean.
We have to pay him.
Oh, I didn't know you paid Sean.
Well, yeah.
I thought his compensation was a cut of whatever Twitch paid.
Yeah, okay.
Well, that's not...
No, no, no, no, no.
But we also have to pay into Twitch.
There's a guy, Don Collins, that he gets paid from all of us.
But he gets a cut of...
Yeah, but we're not generating anything.
Listen, here, it's like a...
It's like a multi-level marketing.
That's right.
Here's the thing
with twitch twitch is fabulous for a lot of people gamers and stuff where it works it makes sense
i'm just trying to get my head around how it works for a more alive morning show in toronto can we do
like you talk about real talk can we can i ask you so uh how many months is that i don't know
what that is well no since february is when we really started let's say it? I don't know what that is. Nine months? Since January. Well, no, since February is when we really started.
Let's say it's,
I don't know,
eight months, let's say.
In eight months,
what, right,
so what will be the income total?
Like how much money will Sean,
I guess he's keeping everything, right?
How much money will he take in
in October 2019?
Like give me an approximate number.
Of what we're bringing in?
How much money Sean will take?
Because Sean...
No, no, here's...
Mike, Mike. Yeah. We pay him for the hours that he puts into it. Okay. We pay him. what we're bringing how much money uh sean will take because sean no no here's my head mike yeah
we pay him for the hours that he puts into it okay because i see that that that i didn't know
i'm learning that so i didn't know how why would you know that because i was on a show chatting
him up about this like uh i talked to sean listen nothing ventured nothing gained and one thing
we've learned you know you try the platform and you it a chance, and we've given it a chance,
and then, right, you know, you get towards the end of the year,
our fiscal year's coming, and you look back, and you think,
okay, what's the return on the investment?
What is this costing us?
What is it doing for us?
Sure.
And the thing is, you know, you just got to make some hard decisions.
But I'll answer your question.
It doesn't generate.
From what we take in, from the listeners that we have,
we have close to 500 followers, but we have only 25 subscribers.
So I think we're generating $80 a month.
Some of that goes to Don Collins as a licensing fee
for being on his platform, for being on his downline.
Okay.
That's what we are.
It is like MLM.
No, it's totally like MLM. I didn't, I didn't i had this is yeah so he's the guy here he has a downline of all of us and we all
kick him money up now the idea eventually is we all make money but we're not we're not at at the
making money part yet and here's you know and it's great a guy like don and i would do it too if i
was in his position so if you have people giving you 30 40 bucks a, and it's great. A guy like Don, and I would do it too if I was in his position.
So if you have people giving you 30, 40 bucks a month and there's two or 300 of them, do the math.
It's pretty good.
Right.
So he's recruiting people all the time to do it.
So you need to recruit people.
Is that the deal?
Like you're supposed to be recruiting people.
But I don't know if we would.
I don't know about that.
Like for example, Howard is a big pitch to me.
Like, oh, you got to come on Twitch and then I go on Twitch
and you take 50%.
No, I don't think it works quite like that.
We're not at the, are you could become that guy there there's
a there's a way in at that level i'm sure you could negotiate that with don so we thought it
was a great idea and it worked you know it works to a i mean it's i'll tell you what's been good
is sean recently about a month or so ago started using using that feed for our Facebook Live. And that actually gets some viewers.
That gets 1,000 people or 1,000 views or so,
gusting to a couple thousand views.
So that's something.
But the actual platform itself,
we're just being honest.
We're not making any money.
And we, because we're not dicks,
kind of dicks, but not completely,
we can't have Sean come in and not give him anything.
So we literally are paying him.
No, good for you.
I didn't know this.
This is good for you.
And again, it's like, again, nothing ventured, nothing gained.
We're going to pay him to service the thing
so we can at least make an intelligent decision on it.
So there's five people on the Humble and Fred payroll right now.
Am I right?
Five people?
Yeah.
Big leagues, man.
That's cool.
Well, more actually,
if you consider the people we also pay commission to.
Yeah.
Like yourself, like Bill, like Jessica.
We have some people like, I'm sorry,
because some of our sponsorship came from other people.
Yeah.
I mean, but a percentage of the,
I think that's different.
I mean, an actual like salary above commission
is five of you.
That's good.
No.
And I don't want to piss on Twitch because it's one, it works.
There's guys making a lot of money, but they're gamers.
They're not middle-aged morning men doing a live radio show.
I mean, just look at the demographic.
But Mike Richards is all in on this Twitch.
He put it on the side of a bus or something.
Oh, great.
I don't know if he's making any money.
I haven't talked to him.
Whatever we're making, he's making less, believe me.
But, and that's just the stone cold reality of it.
But again, same with Mike Richards.
I mean, you know, he sort of is following our model.
And when it was presented to us, it seemed like a good idea.
And it was presented to him and it seems like a great idea.
You can make it sound a lot bigger than it is. Right? Sure so okay so now and now it's all crystallizing so richards is
also in this uh don collins uh in the family we we are under the don collins umbrella and as he
just mentioned the fred man he now probably has a hundred or more people like us right all giving a percentage of the like he
doesn't don doesn't charge us we have we've generated a certain amount of income 80 to 100
every month and part of it goes to him and we give the rest to sean but we also subsidize some of
it's not a lot but it's costing us something as we've it's funny you brought it up because we've
been having this conversation with Sean.
We are also the guys that have to bring the money in and figure out where it goes.
So at some point you go,
well, this is costing us several hundreds of dollars a month.
Is it worth it?
Right.
And like you've got Periscope, it's free.
We could easily do what we're doing right now
on Facebook Live for free.
Yes.
But if you hadn't gone under the john collins
umbrella you could be on twitch for free like i mean i if i go to twitch it's not you can go
yes i guess we could we could break away from don collins and just well how did you could just go on
free yep i didn't know that and here's the deal it again it works good for people the problem with us again is the return
on the investment what is costing us a month now you do your projections how long do we have to do
this before we're going to cover the real dollars that we're spending on it and i don't like the
look of that you're the cfo in the Highland Fred Incorporated.
No, him and I discuss this all the time.
And it's like anything else.
It's like sometimes when you're running a business,
and I'm sure you're the same way,
sometimes you have to stop down and make uncomfortable decisions.
So that's all there is to it.
Yeah.
And it's like we always come back to, what are we doing this for?
We're doing it because we like it,
and we're trying to maybe entertain some people.
And I'll be completely honest.
I've never really totally bought in because I looked at it from, again,
being the money guy, just looking at it, thinking, again,
we're doing a live show in the GTA.
Given the demographic of our audience,
what are the chances that they're going to
stop down and watch this thing?
Right.
And then if you don't know us,
how are we going to get peripheral people?
And this is my argument I had when I had a chat
with Sean about this,
is that the low-hanging fruit,
you know that expression,
the low-hanging fruit are the humble and fred fanatics.
They all fell off the tree in February and March.
I'm thinking the people
who would, here, take my money so
I can subscribe to Twitch to see you every morning.
They're not. They've already done
it. Well, that's what I was going to get to is that
we did it with good intentions.
We thought, let's try it.
I was pushing for it because I went,
oh, okay, this could turn into something.
But you're right. Nothing wrong with that. I was pushing for it because I went, oh, okay, this could turn into something. Something new, something different.
But you're right.
Nothing wrong with that.
Sorry?
Nothing wrong with that.
So of all the people that were going to give us money, the 25 that did, that subscribed to it, they're in.
We're not going to, we haven't, you know, we talked about this recently.
We haven't increased.
We only have one more subscriber than we did three months ago.
We're a bunch of old guys sitting around doing a show on a gaming channel.
What I was going to say, though, is our job is to entertain ourselves and a few people listening.
And to do the show for the 25 that watch us on Twitch is ludicrous because people out there in the world, they don't get the reference.
I haven't had it on my screen in the morning in months because I don't want to be preoccupied by it.
I don't like looking at myself.
You just got to kind of pretend it's not there.
And I don't want to read the comments.
Oh, right.
Yeah, there's the comments.
Okay, so there's comments on Periscope too,
and I don't read them because I don't have it here,
and I don't ever look over there, to be honest,
because I'm busy chatting with my guests.
So, you know like we've
tried a bunch of different things in the time we've been there we tried to when we first started
you remember we used to have the youtube promo every day of course you know we would have somebody
come on the show whoever was the guest we had them you know we recorded a little 30 second
promo which i liked by the way but it never did anything for us but you tweet that that becomes
like you're do anything like we're at the point you know what what are we
going to tweet it no i know i said i liked it i liked it i liked your youtube clips but it didn't
do anything like okay so no one's sawing no one's sawing no one's seeing that then made the connection
and leap to come and you know come hang out with us on our podcast i don't think it did you know
listen you would know better than anyone our podcast numbers haven't increased or decreased in all this time i don't know why but that there's
just a finite number of people that listen to us it hasn't grown and twitch isn't growing it either
i'm hungry i would like to announce that okay Okay. Well, we'll move on. I think I announce that on every Toronto Mike podcast that I do.
I just get hungry.
You should bring like nuts and raisins and like some kind of trail mix or something.
I'm going to eat this palm.
I'm going to eat this palm.
It's going to break your teeth, man.
I'm going to eat this palm of pasta.
But I will say.
Yes, sir.
You know, the numbers, you know, they still don't have a good way of really measuring
this podcast thing.
Because today we're like, what, 116?
But that's just Apple Podcasts.
You know what's rapidly growing is Spotify, for example.
Like there's a lot of, I mean, I never listened to Apple Podcasts.
Most of your listeners are not using Apple Podcasts.
That's why, Howard.
I want to qualify that when you say it hasn't grown.
Yes, it has because people are listening on Spotify now.
They're streaming through iHeartRadio.
Like that ranking, I don't even care about it.
So you're saying that the podcast numbers that we get from Credible Goat,
those numbers?
No, no, I'm not talking about that.
That's what I'm talking about.
I've heard you talk about how your number 200 in comedy,
that's only Apple Podcasts.
I'm talking about our podcast numbers.
I'm talking about our ranking on iTunes.
Spotify, everything is coming off that tit.
Yeah, you only have one instance of your MP3 file.
So that MP3 file gets hit and it hasn't grown.
Now, streaming on the iHeart app,
does that come off the...
Do we stream it live every morning?
We don't know if that's...
We don't even know if we're on it.
And how that works.
Well, you're live on it. We're live on it. We're live on it. They don't archive our show's... We don't even know if we're on. And how that works. Yeah. Well, you're live on it.
We're live on it.
We're live on it.
But they don't archive our show.
And that's not touching.
Obviously, there is no MP3.
That's obviously unrelated.
So our numbers have grown
because last fall,
when we started that radio station,
they had a weekly cue of 77,000.
And then our first book,
they had a weekly cue of 110,000.
The only thing different was us.
Right.
So we can claim some of that.
Sure.
So that's great.
We have some listeners.
Well, there's name recognition.
I think, I mean, I think that's a fact
that everyone over the age of 35
will know the name Humble and Fred
if you're at all a savvy GTA consumer.
And they love the Humble and Fred show.
No, that is, but at least they know you.
I think awareness is half the battle,
is awareness.
I'm honest.
I tell you, I wonder why, you know,
year to year, like we just never...
It just kind of goes along.
Now, it's been great for us.
It's made us a living.
You know, we've sold those numbers
and we've...
You know, it's all voodoo anyway.
But we've managed... The weird thing is our or, you know, it's all voodoo anyway, but we've, we've managed, we've managed.
The weird thing is our sponsors, some of them have been with us like three and four years.
So they must be getting some results, right?
It's like the retirement Sherpa, it's gotta be into his fourth year.
He gets clients from us all the time.
Like he must be able to see an ROI.
Absolutely.
He does.
And so that's what I also think about.
Maybe the numbers haven't gone up, but our audience is engaged and they support us.
And that all, in the end, that's really all that matters.
And really the fact that you have, even in this, what do you call it, this fragmented
media universe, if you, I'm going to make up a number for this round.
If you said there's a thousand people that listen to you, you influence,
and if you told a thousand people that they should try palmapasta,
these thousand people are going to remember to try palmapasta
because Humble and Fred said so.
That number, you could say, oh, that's only a thousand.
Actually, I would argue that that's a pretty damn big number
in this fragmented universe we live in.
Let me explain it this way
more people hear our radio show podcast slash radio show on a daily basis than listen to the
morning show at the wolf in peterborough like i know that for sure and that radio station
you know i haven't been there in eight years it was billing almost four million dollars a year
wow yeah when i before then before you know media was fragmented the way it is now they
were billing even more than that sure my point is the fact that it is a radio station and people
in that area buy in because they can touch the button and they can hear it. And there's my commercial. I'm just saying we have an audience bigger than what they have.
And to your point about a thousand people or 10,000 people, the years ago when we were
first getting into this, a lot of people, Bill Hertz was one of them.
And we would send us articles on podcasting and how they value podcasting differently
than they value time spent listening to radio.
And the value is 13
to 1 so if you have a thousand listeners it's like having 13 000 in radio because they went there and
did it like whoever's listening now did it on purpose right you know you and i and freddie
could be in the car on a road trip and in a lull in the conversation we could just hit a radio
station and they get credit for that right but no one in the car is listening to it.
Or heck, you could be at a dentist office.
Right.
That's my point.
So if we're in the car and you've got an interview with somebody that we're interested in,
Leo Routens, we're going to do it.
All of us would stop talking to listen to it.
Right.
No, and then the other point that I just want to bring up because I produce podcasts
and it's very important is that to me, the Holy grail of marketing is getting,
getting on somebody's smartphone and giving them a notification. Like if imagine, imagine if you
could live on somebody's Apple iPhone X or whatever they have going on in the Apple world,
if you can live on their smartphone and actually make a notification that there's new content from
Humble and fred the the
only way to do that is to create a compelling podcast that people subscribe to and now at any
time you control it's like your own reels at any time you can produce content and you can update
your xml file fred and that will produce a ding on somebody's android device like that to me is
the holy grail like imagine if you could deliver that you can you
can we do you can we do you can we do okay so by the way before i forget kim hughes was here
and wanted me i mentioned um that i knew you guys and she wanted me to say hello to you
no she would say say hi for me oh that's sweet this is hi from kim was uh at the opposite end
of the day for us but we always had a nice relationship with Kim.
She was one of the editors of Now Magazine at the time.
On the radio station, very professional.
Very good.
Very smart, right?
Used to speak words.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I haven't seen her in, God, I don't know how many years.
I don't think I've...
She never worked at Young and Dead Death, did she? No, I don't know how many years. I don't think I've... She never worked at Young and Deadass, did she?
No, I don't think so.
She left...
Strombo got the Live in Toronto gig,
and that pushed her out,
and I want to say that was 97, maybe?
Well, we made the move downtown in 95,
so maybe 96.
Okay, she was probably...
Well, she was at Bathurst and Bloor for sure.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't know about Young and Deadass, but okay.
So, hi from Kim Hughes.
By the way, Dave Bedini was in here last week,
and he made this comment that he says,
radio is broken.
And I'm just, we kind of touched on it,
but I know you're on a radio station,
so there's a little bit of conflict there.
But a typical radio that you hear, is it broken?
Like have they, and I know, Fred,
you have opinions on this.
Like the New Edge Morning Show, for example,
is a brother-sister duo that moved vancouver and i hear nothing about it
like it's almost i don't hear nobody i used to hear things all the time people like to tell
toronto mike things about radio because of they think and i actually it's like uh i hear absolutely
nothing about that brother sister and they might be doing a fine job but i don't think anybody's
i've heard it a couple of times i mean there's just yeah there's just nothing compelling there and it's not true to the format the radio station is called the edge
and say what you want about dean blundell and that's what howard and i did when we were there
we were on the edge like you were true to the name of the radio station now it's just a brother and
sister just telling little stories which is fine um but would argue, I wouldn't say radio is broken.
Radio is a victim.
Like, because I don't have an answer.
Like, if something's broken, how do you fix it?
Like, I don't have that answer right now.
But you could fix it by giving, like,
you guys decide what happens on Humble and Fred Radio.
Like, you guys, that's a two-hour block
where you guys control your content.
There's no, for the record, Mike,
what's his last name? Neighbors?
He's not telling you what to do on your show, right?
You guys do what you want to do, pretty much, within reason.
It's just so fragmented now, Mike.
I don't know...
And you're playing all sorts...
You're playing a ton of music that people can get elsewhere.
The answer is leaning more on talent, but that costs money,
and they refuse to do it.
But giving empowering talent like i mean
strombo i mentioned him a minute ago but he's got a show on cbc radio too and uh and i'm not even
going to comment on whether you know he i think he gives it to cbc radio too and he does it for
like love of the game or something but he uh completely controls what he plays and the content
of the show like he might be the last terrestrial show playing music that does that i don't think
that exists anywhere in terrestrial radio in this market no and you know that he might be the last terrestrial show playing music that does that. I don't think that exists anywhere
in terrestrial radio in this market.
No, and you know,
that used to be the magic of The Edge
or CFNY.
The Marsden philosophy, right?
But it was also lagged behind everybody else
in billing and return on investment again.
So again, I don't know.
I don't know what to do.
Yeah, it's all about the talent.
It's all about the spoken word,
but that costs money.
Like, what are you going to do?
Bring George Strombolopoulos
back to the edge at night?
What's that going to cost you?
They won't do it.
They should do it.
Well, they could bring him,
he could be the new morning show host
on the edge and it could make,
it could be, I mean,
depending on how much leash they give him. Maybe. like i don't know i don't know anything about budgets
and stuff it's like anything else right give it a shot and see because you better come up with
something you know and uh howard any uh thoughts uh radio's not broken just uh i don't know i mean
they've been predicting the end of it for as long as, you know, I think the first time they thought that radio would be over
is when television became, when the talkies became.
But I don't think it's not even so much a question of is it broken anymore.
I mean, 10 years ago we could have had that conversation
about what you might want to do to make radio more engaging.
And we would have.
I mean, I could have come up with some ideas and you know why
don't you do this or why don't you do this strombo thing whatever it is but the problem is now 10
years later you know it's just so insignificant in the average consumer's world like all these
you know it's fall ratings are on now that's why you see all the billboards with rosin mocha and
i saw the edge morning show bus board and i saw Josie Dye and her and I had
this it's funny you said that because we're on Dundas yesterday and just parking my car and one
of the billboards for one of the stations went by and I thought you know what it at one time that
would have been us that was and it made sense you know because there was a chance you might see that
and go oh Humble and Fred are on the mix now, even though they didn't follow us. But potentially. But
now I just think, what is the point of that?
Because I'm not going to choose
a radio station anymore
for my own entertainment.
Having said that, I listen to SiriusXM
still because I think it's great. Part of it is
because Golf Channel or PGA Tour
Radio. You're a huge golf guy. In fact,
that's probably why I'm only
going to address this next question to Fred. I'm not finished want to yeah i'm not finished this part can i finish this part
or did you want to go on to the next question no go ahead so in the end it's not even a matter of
broken or not it's a matter of it doesn't matter anymore when you can here's the thing i said
recently when you can go on and and Peaky Blinders on Netflix or,
you know, some show on Amazon or Hulu or any of those things where people are being very
real,
like even more,
that's why network television is dying because I can watch a network television
show with swearing now,
like a much better version of that show.
And that's why radio,
it's just,
it's,
they're just people being unreal
and it sounds more old-fashioned to me this rate modern radio sounds way old-fashioned to me
and the you gotta watch the terminology because again i don't think it's it's broken
i don't i again it's just a victim of the times. And going forward... Maybe obsolete is what I was saying.
Yeah.
And another thing too,
I don't think radio will ever be dead.
Radio will always be here.
It's just what form.
The radio that is going to survive,
it's just not going to involve music.
It's going to involve people like Toronto Mike
and Humble and Fred,
people that lean into a microphone and tell stories.
That's what it's going to be.
You know, there has to be a point where they're going to look
and there's going to be a paradigm shift.
I like using that because it makes me sound super smart.
But can you spell it?
I can, actually.
I can also use Ben Diagram in a sentence if you want.
But the thing is, there's going to be an intersection
where someone will say, how about this?
Because what people are going to become more and more used will say, how about this? Because what people are
going to become more and more used to is this format of talk. There's no talk like this on
regular talk radio. It's still an old model, issues and topics and bullshit, and it's not
very real. You don't really get a sense of the hosts, but because the rest of the world is
podcasting real people, I think there'll be a time when it will shift over to that
maybe we won't be around to hear it but in order to survive and flourish they have to become more
like podcasters they have to be a bit more real a little bit less you know um polished if you will
or formatic formatted and the thing is that makes sense yeah any song you're about to play i can get
on spotify but what you're about to play, I can get on Spotify.
But what you're about to say, spoken word, a story compelling, I can't get on Spotify.
And again, you're absolutely right.
You know, and here's another thing.
They're going to have to make the decision that if we make this shift, we're going to lose money before we make money.
And again, it'll be like us with Twitch.
It's like, okay, we're going to give this a few months. We're prepared to lose a little money to see if we can make money and none again none of it'll be like us with twitch it's like okay we're going to give
this a few months we're prepared to lose a little money to see if we can make money they're still
not there yet and they better get their head around it well and that's the thing is that some
again and they may never get there i'm just saying like in a world where there are 10 000 podcasts
on every subject under the sun yeah how are you how do you again i only use this as an example i love
jerry agar he's a very very accomplished professional broadcaster but that style
because if i want talk i can go to all those other sources and get the kind of talk that's
real like you know when you're talking about golf that i love yeah so i listen to pga tour radio
but what i like to do is also listen to golf podcasts
because I can hear them being
different than they are on the radio.
I can hear them being real.
Right.
Authenticity.
Yeah.
And every sport,
every discipline,
whether you're into movies or politics,
there's a podcast that represents
what you're listening to,
what you want to hear,
the topic, I should say,
but in a manner that's more authentic.
But anybody that says they have the answer is just,
you know what, they're going to have to try stuff.
Really?
There might be a podcast.
Who knows?
Yeah, maybe there's going to be a radio station.
And who's going to step up and take that risk
when it will cost you your livelihood?
When you're a manager in a big company,
whether it's Julie Adam or whoever,
you're basically in charge of making sure
the next quarter is better than the last
quarter.
Right.
And there's a whack of,
of,
uh,
executives,
middle management people that have been fired.
And we know many of them now are consultants either for radio or
podcasting.
I mean,
really they're just pissing in the wind and they're fooling people.
Cause again,
nobody has those answers and to lose your job in middle management go out and
teach people to do radio the old way is a waste of fucking oh yeah it's crazy just a waste of time
i can't believe they're still doing it um but you know maybe there's survival maybe there is a format
some or or maybe the the future will be just create your own radio station i mean it's simple
as cars get more yeah bluetooth enabled well more bluetooth and
more easier to do it voice activated hey i want to listen to humble and frederick mike like like
i now have captured a few podcasts that i like you know and so i get the notifications but at
some point all of that's going to be super easy so you can create your own and one other thing you
touched on it before and i asked my kids about this, my son in particular,
because it used to be radio stations,
morning shows were water cooler talk.
And I say to my son quite often,
and people of that age,
do people ever talk about what's going on on radio?
Do people get together now,
you should have heard what I heard so-and-so say?
Never.
But social media replaced that.
Yes, that's true. I will say this though,
because Charlie's going to be 25, Spencer's 21. when i was in new york a couple weeks ago was rachel and i
charlie and her best friend james and all they were talking about was episodes of podcasts that
they like yeah because they only have a 20 minute commute commute on the subway but they're they're
they've got their headphones in all day right when they're working away but they're listening they talked about cool podcasts that they like and i was like that's
and it's a demographic thing i'm sure there are people out there today within their own demographic
saying did you hear what derringer said this morning or whatever but not like it used to be
but even rachel is 54 you know she is a podcast and this is your girlfriend this is
rachel and you know i listen to a couple podcasts that are on the mental side of the game and
of golf and i and i i go and choose that content and that's the difference is that even during
this election i happened to be in the car i threw on news talk 10 10 i threw on 680 news
but to me it's just like so dry and so it just sounds old-fashioned to me and that
when the radio is broken i will say this the model that it's been predicated on for all these years
that is broken and i know that people that were friends with the john moores and the agars and
the jim richards are fantastic but they're broadcasting in a model that i don't think
works anymore or doesn't work as well again
it's a demographic thing because if you look at it the people listening to that show haven't quite
caught up yet and you know i know this old uh retired broad and brampton nice is it delise
is that how you would talk about your wife but even her she used to listen on the way home to
whatever she got on to podcasts and every night she would
come home and talk about the podcast she listened to right every person listening to a podcast in
the car is one less person listening to the radio and that number is growing way faster than they
want to uh even and once you dip your toes in that podcast ocean you just go for the swim man you're
gonna get soaked i mean i will say this i i don't i'm nowhere near a podcast
listener as we if we'd like people to listen to us but because i still like serious i think serious
is a great service for me because i have my favorites but lately i've noticed i've started
bluetoothing more podcasts in my car i've also started bluetoothing my spotify because he and
i got this uh new we have a new thing with Bell.
Did it go up to six gigs, that thing that we're in now?
No, 10, I think.
Okay.
It's enough for me to go, you know what?
I want to listen.
I've told Fred this morning,
for some reason I'm getting back into Pearl Jam.
So I've just been listening to Pearl Jam nonstop in my car.
But it's what we said earlier.
I've created this station, Howard's Pearl Jam Station,
where I can listen to it over and over again.
Right.
I love it.
It's custom made for you.
So all those things may add up to it sounds like radio is broken.
I just think that when it's all said and done,
it has to change in a way that it was going to be very difficult.
It's like network television.
Eventually, I mean, the future of that is just live events, live sports, live news events, live events.
What's the use of having a Pittsburgh CIA or whatever the fuck it is full of commercials?
I think like you too, Fred.
And then I realized, wait a minute, how many people tuned into Big Bang Theory last week?
Like, it seems like there's a middle America, if you will, that seems to still...
Yeah, there are exceptions, but look at the big picture.
Sure.
Yeah, you got shows like that, but a lot of kids are streaming.
Even Big Bang Theory isn't available on Crave now without commercials.
And so, yeah, you can cherry pick.
There's outliers and everything, and there's big network shows.
But I'll tell you what, you know, American Idol, if it's still on the air,
ain't getting $35 million like it did back in its heyday.
But, see, I think that is the future.
Like, Delise watched The Voice last night.
The only time she watches network TV is for an event like a live The Voice.
Yeah, but I'll guarantee you The Voice doesn't get what it pulled in the air.
No, I didn't even close.
But American Idol is way before The Voice. like a live voice. Yeah, but I'll guarantee you the voice doesn't get what it pulled in the ear. No, I didn't even close. But even,
but American Idol
is way before the voice.
It was getting 35 on Tuesdays
for the original shows
and 30 or 28 for Wednesday's
results show.
Those numbers only exist
in television.
But you can see it,
you can see it unfolding now.
It's like all these shows
they're coming up with
because, you know,
give them credit.
They see that's where the future is.
Now they have this thing where a celebrity comes on with a mask and sinks.
All those type of shows, that's where it's going.
Now, just to give some perspective on those numbers dwindling now,
is that that Game of Thrones finale,
which was the most hyped finale we've had in quite some time,
I think that had 17 million viewers.
Yeah, and you compare that to something like the finale of Cheers,
or whatever, it's 75 million. Well, what I do is this, right?
That's different though. In the heyday of
Seinfeld and
Friends, like when it was
in Mania, they put a show in the middle called
Caroline in the City, which didn't last very
long, but it would get 17
million viewers.
Caroline Ray is Canadian,
I think. She's not in that series.
I think it's Lee Thompson.
I'm not sure that's a fair...
I don't know if that's a fair comparison
though, because Game of Thrones wasn't
network television. There was a barrier
to entry there that a lot of
people just won't go for.
And most people, let's face it, most people steal it
to be honest.
A lot of people I know...
Anyway, you asked a question about radio being broken.
You know you wanted to move on to something else.
No, I remember on the old canadianthinker.com,
Fred shared a letter he got,
like a recommendation referral letter from Bob McCowan.
Yes, still have it.
And I always remember that
because it was when he was at CKFH.
Is that where...
Yeah, CKFH, 1979, 78, 79.
Definitely late 70s for sure.
And I wanted Fred, and I know you're golf only, Howard.
So this is really a Fred thing
because I know you love your Leafs and et cetera.
But what are your thoughts on these huge changes at 590 lately?
Like McCowan's gone, Brady's gone.
They bring in Scott MacArthur to do mornings.
They put Tim and Sidney after you.
And does this have... Totally lost me.
I'm a TSN 1050 guy.
And you were like that before McCowan got canned.
I was torn,
but the afternoon show
with Brian Hayes and Jeff O'Neill
and Jamie McClellan. Overdrive.
Overdrive. It's just very
entertaining. I think they're doing it right.
They talk about sports. They talk about guy stuff.
It's funny. And what's ever going
on in the afternoon over at the fan, I don't
know.
You know, Brunton, what's the other
guy's name? Jeff Blair. They need to loosen up.
It's only sports. That's two to five. It's only
sports, guys.
And Tim and Sid, I don't know enough about them.
They could never win me over from overdrive.
I think they're aiming at guys
much younger than me, to be honest.
Well, my afternoon listening is Katris and McGinnis on tap, K-M-O-T.
That's my show.
It starts at 4 o'clock, I think.
It's Brian Katrick, who's a very fine amateur golfer out of the States,
and his partner is John McGinnis, a former tour player.
And they interview people about the PGA Tour,
and it gets me going with my two-hour block.
But the fan morning show, I'm not a fan of.
Ashley Dawking and Scott McArthur.
I find it.
I like Scott McArthur.
He's been in here, right?
Yeah.
And then the mid-day, they've just,
TSN 1050 has won me over the,
except for 10 to 12 when they play Dan Patrick,
I'm not interested.
I don't need to hear about American college stuff.
And syndicated stuff.
But other than that, they've just won me over.
Well, you like it.
I think it sounds like you like Overdrive because it's kind of like guys radio.
So I want to play an old promo that I dug out of the vaults that hasn't been played in quite some time.
So let's listen to this for a moment.
Of course, it is okay to be a guy.
It's also okay to be a girl.
Especially if you're a hot smoking babe carrying a case of beer and talking
about sports gadgets and other manly issues like they do on mojo radio talk radio for guys with
humble and fred mornings mojo radio the all-new am640 dan got that that's dan duran yeah he had
he i thought it was all Jamie that did that.
A couple of questions.
Have you tuned out?
No, I was just checking to see if this client is coming in tomorrow.
No, Monday, actually.
I thought.
I have tuned out.
I didn't know if Dan.
You'll be back.
I didn't know if Dan.
I thought that was all Jamie.
Anyway, go ahead.
So that's a Dan Duran promo.
Very interesting to even hear that because I don't think that anyone would have the,
I hate to use this,
the balls to try that kind of a promo in 2019.
You couldn't call,
the slogan of the radio station was talk radio for guys.
That would be,
what do you mean just guys?
Why not everybody?
And binary.
Listen, even in 2001, we got some of that.
Yeah.
I was up at the Tin Palace one day,
and a woman literally attacked me on the beach.
She found out, made a beeline for me.
But it's not for being a talk with your guys.
Maybe it's for that presentation I heard there
about hot babes and bikinis,
like this whole objective.
Oh, yeah, that for sure wouldn't happen.
I'm just saying.
No, I'm saying, of course, you're right.
That would never go.
But even the slogan of the station,
you know, the slogan of the station wouldn't know, there are, the slogan of the station
wouldn't fly now.
What was it?
Talk radio for guys.
Oh, right.
Talk radio for guys.
Right.
Because there'd be less,
what do you mean,
just for men?
Because there's 14 stations in Toronto
that are just talk,
that are just radio stations for women
that are female centric
and I don't care.
But they don't build themselves.
Well,
they do internally.
There's a lot of guys,
you know,
I learned from these books, if you can trust them, I don't know But there's a lot of guys. You know what I learned from these books,
if you can trust them, I don't know,
but that a lot of guys are listening to CHFI.
Oh, that's bullshit.
Please.
I'll tell you.
Now, you know, actually, that is such bullshit.
Because you know why guys are listening?
Because the wives of the mother ended up with the little.
The ballots.
Or the little PPM.
The little PPM thing.
Guys won't wear them.
Same with, like, you're going to tell me the number one station, 18 to 34 men,
which CHFI has been a few times.
That's valid?
People actually buy that shit?
In the mid-90s, you know, we had a couple of books where we were number one,
18 to 34 men and women.
We had a couple of books where we actually got beat by chfi with
men 1824 so the numbers are a bit but yes you're right there are some men that listen to that
station my point is there's always that that those stations there's there were so many stations in
toronto that were female centric pop stations uh light rock or whatever you want to call it. Easy Rock. Easy Rock, Chum FM, CHFI.
But here was this station that claimed to be talk radio for guys.
And that would not fly now.
Although there's no reason why it shouldn't.
It's just where, there's nothing wrong with that, talk radio for guys.
Here's a radio station that's for guys.
What's wrong with that other than where we sit nowadays?
Well, I'll give you an example.
There's an actual golf course in Toronto, in Richmond Hill, I think,
called Toronto Ladies.
I think it's like one of those
young street north.
And that's fine.
I don't give a crap.
They can have their own golf course.
But if you open up a golf course
and call it Toronto Men's.
Yeah, but that to me is like
if somebody were to say,
hey, there's a gay pride parade,
we should have a straight pride parade.
Like to me, that's ridiculous were to say, hey, there's a gay pride parade, we should have a straight pride parade. Like to me, that's ridiculous
because to me,
it's the oppressed groups that have to be.
No, I know what your point is.
That reaction always kills me.
You do realize you can't go
and celebrate a straight pride
because that is,
every life is straight pride.
I wouldn't want to.
Right.
No, but I know what your point is.
I know what your point is.
It's like white pride.
Yeah, the analogy between the Toronto ladies and all because but the fact is i'm just talking about
the name right you said talk radio for if you said uh the new radio station's called talk radio for
chicks or talk radio for women no most guys would be like great enjoy yourself but you go you start
a radio station right now called talk radio for guys women would be like
why why is it just for guys although a lot would listen to no but you know what i'm saying like
the pushback and i get what you're saying right mike though your press group uh the the people
that have not been oppressed well there's a reason we have black lives matters and you would
you would be uh it would be so inappropriate to start a white lives matter group right no i don't know
you know what i would say fucking go crazy you're stupid yeah go crazy it wouldn't offend me it
offends me because it minimalizes the whole point of black lives you think too much yeah like who
maybe i do but i am always thinking it's true but i don't know if i think too much i haven't
been accused i think you think a very great amount. No, no, and that's great,
but the thing is, same with the straight pride parade.
You think, look at those assholes.
What a waste of time,
but hey, it's free country.
Go for it.
I had this joke for years that they should have at least a straight pride
or straight float in the pride parade
celebrating straight people
because as I've said for years,
we're the leading producers of new gay people.
Like we are.
We're producing new gay people every day.
Where's our celebration?
Very good.
Stan's going well? You still do stand-up?
I do. Pretty soon are we going to
have an angry
middle-aged white guy parade? Because we'll be in the
minority. We'll be in minority. Can we have
that parade? It's not about minority.
You know that. In South Africa, where your wife is
from, it was not about minority.
The whites were the minority. It's about about minority. You know that. In South Africa, where your wife is from, it was not about minority. The whites were the minority.
Okay, wrong word.
It's about holding the power.
Okay.
Listen, I've been a marginalized minority group
my whole life.
And, you know, it's different.
And I'm being serious.
I never had any of the aggravation
that somebody who's non-white goes through.
But I did this show the other night.
You asked me about stand-up. I did this show the other night. You asked me about stand-up.
I did this show the other night at a synagogue,
which is weird for me, but it's fun.
There was a group of 250 people
that when I said this bit about,
there's a bit of, I sort of joke about,
there's like a little tiny bit of anti-Semitism
that's pervasive in our society.
In fact, it's more than a little bit.
Last year, the number one group, Mike,
for hate crimes in
toronto was not black not indian was jewish that's 2019 my friend i believe that so um there is
definitely you know i've had people say weird shit to me my whole life i told a story about a guy
you know doing the whole thing about you know we're gonna i wanted to buy a car and he said
well you know that whole thing where you could talk
to the manager
and I'm going to see
if I can get you
a better price.
He said to us,
me and ex-wife Randy,
I'm just going to talk
to the manager
and see if I can't
Jew him down.
Oh yeah.
So,
it's not like it's hurt me
but it's definitely
something I noticed
being a non,
you know,
non-majority
Protestant,
Catholic,
Catholic or whatever.
So, I don't know what the, Catholic, or whatever. So,
I don't know what
the point of all this is.
There's no point in this
because Fred and I
are not part of any,
I don't,
we're straight,
white men
living in Toronto
or this and the GTA.
How fucking dare we?
Oh,
no,
you don't get a say in,
that's a no,
it's not about how dare you.
You don't get a say
in the matter.
But the fact is,
we have,
you don't get a say
in the matter.
You don't, you didn't get a, nobody came to you and the fact is... What do you mean I don't get a say in the matter? You didn't get a...
Nobody came to you and said,
would you like to be gay or straight?
Would you like to be a man or a woman?
Would you like to be white or a person of color?
Would you like...
So all of these things you're born into.
So of course, there's no how dare you.
You are what you are.
You have no say in the matter is what I'm saying.
Bingo.
I know, but you need to check your privilege.
You need to be aware that you're probably not getting
pulled over by a cop when you're driving out
and a black man will
my daughter youngest one who's a super
justice warrior whatever
what is the phrase
social justice warrior so her boyfriend's
Indian and she doesn't think
and she doesn't think we're ethnic enough
being Jewish and I always say to her
what honey you know more hate crimes she goes it doesn't matter because you won't get pulled over that's
a point though and it's but she's a good point she goes the difference is yeah we might be an
ethnic minority but you ain't getting pulled over uh the same way that her boyfriend or charlie's
boyfriend would be because charlie's boyfriend is a person of color. Very colorful.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, this is my point to Fred all the time,
is that nobody's pulling us over,
even you, Fred.
I'm not Fred.
You're not Fred.
I knew that by the way.
Okay.
Nobody's pulling you over.
Right.
It's wrong.
For any reason.
But there are this racial profiling from cops.
And here's the scary thing.
And I speak only because I've heard this from people of color.
When you're pulled over as a person of color, there's a chance you will die.
This is how scary it is for a person of color.
Less so in Toronto, but still.
It's a very different dynamic we can never appreciate.
Listen, I've talked to Charlie, my daughter, about her boyfriend, and I always ask, do you guys ever experience anything?
Do you ever worry?
Are there places you would ever experience anything? Do you ever worry? Do you go,
are there places you would worry to go?
And she says,
not in Toronto,
but I think in New York,
well,
maybe not even New York.
New York's pretty liberal,
but I worry about that.
But there's definitely huge swaths of the USA.
There's more to be concerned of than I would have to,
or he would have to.
We don't even,
it's not even a thought in our head.
We never,
ever need to think about that.
And it's something as always would be in your head.
If you were born a black person
but you're so aggravated
Fred I know
you said you gotta check your white privilege
what do you mean by that
every day I just gotta realize what
yesterday I heard you say something to the effect of
why don't you just let
racism naturally go away
because there's more non-white people
I didn't say that
please clarify your remarks.
I never said let nature take its course.
I never said, no.
I said the profile of the city
will change in time.
For sure.
You can't force it.
That's when the problems start.
I said, when I sit with my son
and there's like six kids
and they're all of a different race,
that is going to be the face of this city in the years to come.
It's going to happen naturally.
The problem was, you know, just a few short years ago,
the power base was all white guys.
Slowly but surely, all these non-white people
will slowly grab those positions of power.
Just by the numbers.
Yeah, what were you saying is that?
It doesn't work that way.
Well, it does to a degree.
It's not about numbers.
It's not about numbers.
Here's the...
It's not about numbers.
Okay, all right.
Anyway.
Fred's about to storm off.
No, no, no.
We'll never agree on this, Mike.
All I'm saying is just let...
Like, you know what?
The whole basis of civilization
has been evolution.
Let it evolve.
Let it breathe.
These kids that we're looking at,
they'll look after it, believe me.
I sat in his ex-wife's home the other night
and I just saw all those kids of different races.
They're going to lead companies
and they're going to be hiring other kids of that.
It's frightening to me that you don't see it,
that they won't because people keep hiring themselves.
It's a white power structure, right?
Now, hear me out.
The executives are white men, right?
When they hire, they hire themselves. so they will hire somebody like themselves companies now are
mandated not but that's right but it's mandated that's what i'm saying they're not letting nature
take its course they're forcing it because you can't let it come naturally so you're saying
forcing is wrong i'm saying no i'm saying you have to force yes this is my point your argument
yesterday that i don't we should move on because I don't want to have a fight about it,
but the argument I heard from you yesterday is don't force it
because there are now already naturally more people of color
than there are white people in this city,
which I believe is probably true right now.
53% of the city.
Right.
So naturally those people will become executives and run businesses.
And that's not true.
Listen, I don't think Fred's completely right.
I don't completely believe that you're correct,
but I get what you're saying.
I'll give you an example.
Charlie works for a company in New York.
So New York's like 15 years ahead of where we're going to be.
It always is.
Same with California.
So she works for a company.
One of the principals is a woman,
and the other person is a man of color,
and all they hire are people like them,
women and gay and straight, all kinds of people.
So that's kind of what you're saying, that given the makeup of the world,
it will naturally evolve to a less male-whiteric and more of a diverse centric. But to
your point, Mike, it's not going to happen at the rate it should because the preponderance of
everyone in charge is still white and male. You look at the people that control the Fortune 500
companies. Here's a great example. That picture of Nancy Pelosi
in that meeting.
Right.
Just how many,
there's 15 or 20 men in the room.
She's the only woman.
Right.
And there are no people of color.
Right.
So that's where,
that's a snapshot of power.
Right.
In 2019.
Right.
So that's what,
that's why I understand
what you're saying,
that it needs to change with,
it has to be legislated.
Okay.
And I think that can be a problem.
I'd look at it this way.
Guys in their maybe 60s, 70s,
maybe late 50s,
but somebody like me and you,
if I'm the white power man now,
but my kids have been surrounded
by non-white kids,
different ethnic,
you know what I mean?
Slowly but surely,
that all becomes part of your world.
Way too slowly is what I guess is my point. Okay, fine.
So let's leave it there.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This has been great.
No, I...
It's fantastic.
Speaking of black men, okay?
Quite a segue right there.
Rob Wilkes says,
Does Fred have a copy of Cameroon in honor of Spicy
P? If he's played it in the last few
decades, I apologize for not hearing it.
You had a song called Cameroon. No, we
did. We did. Okay, so I'm just reading the
question. Yeah, when Cameroon
was in the World
Cup. Is it World
Cup? That's why the guy thought
it, because we used to play during the sportscast.
And I guess he thinks of Cameroon every time he sees a spicy peas from uh from cameroon now i heard you guys talking on
your podcast very recently about the podcasts that you did before you went daily like you went
daily in october 2011 uh october 17th was our first full show actually october 14th i was at
that 14th show i don't know why it's a red-headed stepchild that we neglected. It was a
fine show. It was a fine show. It was a few C words.
Except I said the C word. Because you
could. Because I could. Yes,
we did a bunch of podcasts with you. The first
one was December of 2006.
That was a little Christmas get-together
at Dan's.
Do you want to know? Because I heard you guys were...
I think you were asking Dan. Actually, I think
Dan updated in a minute too. But do you want to... Because I actually have them all. So you want to hear? Because I heard you guys were, I think you were asking Dan. Actually, I think Dan updated in a minute too.
But do you want to,
because I actually have them all.
So you want to hear them all real quick?
So yeah, December 2006 was the first one.
That was the Humble and Fred's gift of Christmas.
Then in January 07,
so only a month later,
Humble and Fred's message of hope.
That's right.
And then one month later in February,
so you guys did a podcast of love.
That's right.
And then there was a big break.
Maybe it was a little
frosty in your relationship.
I'm not sure.
But there was a break.
Humble and Fred
didn't do anything
for a long time.
We did another one.
When was the next one?
I know we did the next one.
May 2009.
And it was to celebrate
your 20th anniversary together
and you called it
the Podcast of Memories.
And you did it live
on location.
At Pride FM.
No.
Pride FM? No, no, I had a bar
like at a
right on
Queen Street, right? No, we
were, you know, here's what happens. I got a
job and he got a job. He moved to Peterborough.
So May 2009, you do the
20th anniversary show. There were, I remember Tyler
Stewart was there and Nick
Kiprios, some big guests.
And then on December 2009, you guys did the,
we call it Humble and Fred's fifth podcast.
I guess we ran out of creative ideas.
And then February 2010, which was during the Olympics in Vancouver,
you guys did the podcast of bronze.
So some of these are proud of them.
Then you did April 2010.
Yes.
The Eastover podcast.
Beautiful.
Did you combine the Easter podcast?
Passover and Easter, yes.
And then you did your final podcast
before you went daily in October 2011.
You did it Christmas 2010,
and it was called
The Humble and Fred's Gift of Christmas.
And that was at Pride FM, I think.
So there you go.
That is the,
so that's eight, I believe.
One, two, three, four, five.
Yeah.
So there were eight podcasts over a five-year span
before you guys started doing what you've been doing for eight years.
So pretty cool.
Cool.
Yes.
Those were all very exciting.
Any plans for your 30th?
I like the fact that we did a podcast.
You were really the one that pushed us.
I'd never heard of a podcast until you mentioned what they were.
I don't even, did we call them podcasts? I guess we did.
So here's the, just
earlier that year, iTunes
added podcasts
and one of the ones I was
tuning into is Ricky Gervais had a podcast
and it was really, you're right,
because I remember when you guys went to Dan Duran's house
and by the way, in a minute I do want a Dan update
because I know there's some news there.
I do remember when it was like, okay,
Dan was going to create an MP3 file
and then it was like, okay,
what is this syndication mechanism exactly?
Like I distinctly remember a sad lack of resources
on the web, like guides and how to do it.
And a lot of it was reverse, what do you call that?
When you reverse engineer it,
like where I would go to Ricky Gervais and say,
what is the mechanism by which the subscription
and then reverse engineer?
Was that the podcast he was doing with that character,
that guy that was just interviewing his buddy,
the guy that used to make fun of all the time?
Yeah, Stephen, aka the co-creator of The Office.
Yeah, the two of them interviewing that dumb guy.
Yes, yes, the entertaining dumb guy, yeah.
So Dan Duran.
Yeah, so Dan Duran.
What do you want to know about Dan?
Okay, last we heard Dan Duran was the weatherman in Peterborough.
Was it Czechs, Fred?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And he got let go a month or so ago.
So Dan is no longer the weatherman for Czechs.
And now Dan is full-time weather for the Humble and Fred show every morning at 7.15.
And he Skypes in from his...
Skypes in from his estate outside of Peterborough.
That means his son is also going to turn 18 next his son is i think
very short he just got his full-on driver's license yeah his son is uh gotta be either 18
or no because when uh when dan lived in blue or west village area his son and my son were buddies
in the same class and i know they're born both born in 02 so uh yeah and he's your godson right
he is indeed not dan Dan, but Colton.
30-year anniversary
for you guys.
It's been 30 years.
Here's a quick ad
from 1989,
which was 30 years ago.
All right.
FM 102's
Humble Howard
and Fred Patterson.
Oh, sure.
You could listen
to another morning show.
But will they play
Toronto's hottest
modern rock?
No way.
Will their news,
weather, traffic,
and sports
be as entertaining?
I don't think so.
Will they have as much fun as we do?
They can't even spell fun.
Will they be as intelligent as we are?
Okay, but we'll definitely be more fun.
Wake up with Humble and Fred on Toronto's Modern Rock FM 102.
Moscow Circus of Fun.
Just so you know, apparently your feed is doing something
because I just got a note from Schwerma.
Yeah, DJ Schwerma.
I saw him at the Opera House.
He's watching us on,
what is it?
Periscope.
He just said,
what did he say?
This is exciting.
He said,
Steven Merchant and Ricky Gervais,
you sweet fat bastards sound great.
He's doing podcasts for Athletic.
That's right.
Yeah, he is.
Which is pretty cool.
Yeah, man.
Hello to DJ Shwarma.
He did a set.
I know he came on your show to promote it,
but the party for Marty at the Opera House
was really cool.
And he did a whole set there with Dhingra and Craig G.
DJ Paul. DJ Paul Dhingra and DJ dj paul dj paul dingra and dj craig
g so good guys almost done here i want to ask you about the almost happened so i won't bore people
with what happened with humble and fred because they can go and listen to a previous episode uh
especially episode 100 but there are some gigs you almost got and i'm very very very interested
in these almost happens like for example when you guys
were doing the morning show in Kingston
Ontario for Rogers yes
you almost syndicated that
beyond Kingston yeah we were
basically had a meeting lined up with the
program director and the
vice president of Rogers program director
of a station in London and so Fred
and I were all excited and
we get on the phone thinking
it was going to be a meeting a conference call to talk about like i think it was on like on a
friday we were going to start like very soon and that was we got on the call thinking that was the
the subject and then we got on the call and it was not the subject it was to tell us that we're not
going to london so how close was it though that well we thought we were they basically were ready to start adding stations for they were talking about how we were going to London. So how close was it though that you were going to... Well, we thought we were... They basically were ready to start adding stations.
Well, they were talking about how we were going to do
with the commercials and the breaks and all that stuff.
Oh, yeah.
But that model is everywhere now.
Oh, yeah, of course.
We had the same show.
We always missed the boat.
Yeah, we were close.
And we would have been on maybe a dozen AMs
or a dozen stations had the Kingston thing worked out.
There's another thing thing this bullshit about ratings and um
you know radio is okay you know because you read this stuff all the time was still stronger never
92 percent of homes have radio you know how many canadian stations have syndicated american shows
now into canada even morning shows afternoon drive in ottawa there's
a seattle show going into calgary now a morning show yeah that shows you how healthy they are
what's your next question and there's i mean there's a boom station i think there's a bunch
of boom stations in alberta no i mean at the same morning show oh they do have many many many many
markets have the exact same morning show syndicated. No, I know.
Calgary has, it's vice versa.
Calgary has the Vancouver morning show, or Calgary has the whatever.
Yeah, there's a lot of that going on now.
But it's Vancouver and Calgary.
A lot of that going on.
Yeah, and those are pretty big markets in this country.
Here's an exciting one I don't think anyone knows about, but I got a hint that this was happening in the 90s,
in the early 90s.
So you guys hook up in 89.
Howard comes from, he was with Lumbee in Montreal,
and Howard comes and joins Fred to be humble.
And Fred, then you disappear for a little bit humble
because you go to CKFM.
Yep.
Which you're the first person to say Mix 99.9.
I was the very first person to say the Mix.
It's a fun fact. Yep. Which is now Virgin now virgin radio but okay so then you come back to edge came back in
92 august in uh september october no maybe october november and um i i've been away for a couple
years almost and then fred was there doing the morning show with various people we come back
together and then i uh get offered a job to go to Q.
That's what I want to ask you about.
And I said,
no,
but if you'll offer both of us the job,
maybe we'll consider it.
And so they offer then was for both of us.
And it was for a bunch more money than we were making.
And we couldn't say no.
So we said yes.
And we talked about this other day,
but remember that?
I don't know.
Where do we,
I came back to Brampton for you and I
to have a meeting at some place.
Was it the chicken place?
Which one are you talking about?
Oh, when you went to Mix.
Oh, Q.
No, Q.
Early 90s.
No, so I came back.
They offered us both a job.
We said yes,
because it was way more than we were making
at CFNY, The Edge,
and when we went in to tell our boss,
Vince DiMaggio,
a real person, that we were leaving,
I thought he was going to get really mad
because they came hard to recruit me from the mix.
I wanted to come back and work with Fred,
but still it was a big deal for me to go back to the station.
And here we were only three or four months later leaving,
but it was very impressive
because he didn't get mad at us, me especially. He just got very quiet and said, okay, let me ask you this question.
Is it the opportunity or is it the money? And I said, for me, it's the money. And he said,
well, just leave it with me. He matched the offer and signed us for that. At that time,
I had a three-year contract that was four months into it, but he signed us for that. At that time, I had a three-year contract. That was four months into it, but he signed us for five years.
And that sort of, you know, listen,
we owe a lot to a lot of people,
but that bump up, that was a big bump.
Like we both got a lot of money to go to the mix,
but the leap from what I was making at the mix
to what I ended up making five months later
because of that offer.
Can you tell us?
Because it's way back then.
You can tell us now.
I can tell you that I was making about $120 at the mix.
And that offer almost more than doubled it.
Like $250, it sounds like.
Which was a lot of money at the time.
It's a lot of money now.
Well, yes and no.
Not based on what a lot of the...
It's not Fred money.
No, no.
Based on what morning shows are getting
in the past 10 years in Toronto.
Right.
Which we're also responsible for, by the way.
Yes.
Because, yeah.
That's another Sony saying.
Rising tide.
No, well, no.
And even prorated.
Yeah.
It's not what they're making now.
You know, our last few years.
Million dollar morning shows
in Toronto
became quite common
in the mid 2000s.
Derringer famously
signed a 10 year deal
for something like
a million dollars or something,
which comes up really soon, I think.
But that 10-year deal was as a direct result of us leaving the company.
Because, I don't know if we've ever told the story, but whatever.
The fact that we left Chorus.
No, the 10-year deal wasn't.
No, but the first big contract he got, him and Blundell,
they basically signed both of those guys to longer-term deals.
Stafford, too, I think.
Stafford, whatever, because of us.
Because somehow there was a, our little loophole allowed us to leave.
Yes.
We should never have been able to leave.
Like it was a shit, you should never have come to that.
Because there were moments, there were triggers in our contract whereby this time, in a certain
amount of time left in the deal we had to be um signed
or we could deal with whoever we wanted because prior to that we couldn't talk to anybody it was
bad timing because the general manager at the time just wasn't big fans of ours and he dragged his
feet and dragged his feet and he just thought i didn't know what he was trying to do behind the
scenes but he almost got fired over oh yeah like yeah. Like we were like, let's say our contract was up in July of,
of 2003 by September of that 2002,
a year out,
we had to start negotiating and his general manager kept dragging his feet
and behind the scenes was telling our boss who loved us president,
of course,
Oh,
don't worry.
It's fine.
How's the negotiation going,
bud?
Oh,
it's great.
Kept dragging it out, dragging it out. Come the come the spring we're like we're not signed yet he's
making it seem like he's doing us a big fucking favor so we're like okay we'll talk to some other
people right and when we finally told them that we were leaving that guy it took him by surprise
because he thought fuck this humble effort they're not going anywhere. And when he told his bosses that we were leaving,
they almost, well, they sent
him out of the market.
So he should have had his ass fired.
Because you guys went to the mix.
Because he was telling them all along,
oh, this is a done deal, don't worry about it.
Okay, fascinating.
But the Q story,
can you tell me, who was the morning show at
Q when they were talking about you coming over?
I think Jake had just left.
Jake had just left, yeah.
So it was after, so Jesse and Gene, then brother Jake.
And in the end, listen, I was 32, he was 36.
We were trying to like, we made a decision.
They offered us a lot of money, more than i would ever think to make and i of
course had to say yes and i was you know i wanted but i didn't want to go without him because i just
come back and the reason i came back was i liked working with fred and i just thought it's a better
opportunity so the the job offer was for both of us and both of us benefited from us saying we were
leaving well that that was
perfect because you they got you got more money for staying where you were that's pretty damn good
that's pretty damn good way more money the devil you know too bad we didn't learn that in 2003
but it's one like you know hindsight's 2020 like uh you know you could be looking back at oh that's
the best thing we ever did can you know drive it in your Bentleys or whatever, but, you know, now you have the hindsight.
Yeah, now we're...
That was a big mistake.
Now we're driving an ice cream truck.
Have we hit two hours yet?
Yeah, we're wrapping up here.
Let me just get a question in from the guests.
Bobby, did you almost get a gig at Hits 97.7?
Nope.
He may have.
I didn't.
I almost got a gig at Y95.
There was a guy named Sturm.
What was his name?
Sturm Kalduff or something.
Like Kalduff, yeah.
So I was a couple years into my non-compete,
and I was offered the morning show there,
and I went to Slate, the Slate family.
I said, hey, can I get out of part of this contract?
They weren't offering me what I was being paid.
And he said, no, because we have properties in Hamilton.
We did a few guest spots on, not 97, but on CKTV.
What's it?
The station in St. Catharines?
610?
Yeah, 610.
We did?
Yeah.
Remember we went in and guested a few times with Larry? Larry Fedorek. Yeah, Larry Fedorek. We did? Yeah. Remember we went in and guessed it a few times?
With Larry?
Larry Fedorik.
Yeah, Larry Fedorik.
We didn't do it.
Yeah, but wasn't that promoting the podcast on?
Right.
Because the podcast played 10 to midnight.
Right.
That's right.
Right.
Okay, final stretch here.
I just want to get the questions in.
And this one, you don't even have to dignify this one of response, Fred.
But Ben Vidal says, is Fred still a shill for the Conservative Party? And that's, I don't think that's a fair question
because you've been very public. You voted
for Scheer and that doesn't make
you a shill. You have the right to vote
for any party you want to.
I promised everyone I'd read their questions.
What's his name?
Ben Vidal.
He says, remember when he ran that blog
as if he was
a rational thinker.
So Ben disagrees with your politics, I think.
Yeah, so that makes him rational and me irrational.
No, I mean, I'm just going to read.
I don't remember.
That's a name from the past.
Ben Fidel?
Yeah, I'd want to spend like 10 minutes with that guy.
And how much did you pay to get fake followers on Twitter?
Do you want to like just establish, because
he says 80% of your followers disappeared
overnight. Who says that, Ben? Ben Fideli. I don't care
about that. Here's the thing about Ben.
Do you know of him? No.
But after we leave this
beautiful
studio,
we'll literally never think about
Ben Fideli. Here's what I would like.
Here's what I'd like. Because afterper. Here's what I'd like,
because after the show,
I was going to tell you about something else too.
Sure.
Get Ben to come in one day and sit right there.
I'll sit right here.
That'd be a good show.
You can work that out with Ben.
No, no, seriously.
Get Ben,
because all these guys have big balls.
Get Ben to come and sit here.
I'll sit here.
I guess in Ben's defense,
if you want to defend,
he could have been like a hamburger lover.
He's Ben Vidal. At least he's signing his name
to this thing. That's true. I will give him
because a lot of people like Ben don't ever sign
their name.
And that's another thing about being
what we've been doing all our lives.
You people in the social media
era are just catching up
to the fact that since I was 17
and he was 19 19 we've had people
saying all kinds of stuff about us right without mostly nice but a lot of it's true though oh no i
know you know we've had to deal with social media pressure for 40 fucking years how have we almost
always dealt with it come on in we've invited them into the show i did hear you had on this
there's that one guy in north y guy. But that's a security issue.
There's been many guys over the years
that we've said,
come on in and sit down.
Let's talk about it.
And that diffuses them.
Or 90% of them you never hear from.
Never hear from again.
Right, right.
One-Eyed Oracle,
do you think that's a real name?
One-Eyed Oracle says,
how did they get their name
Two Knobs One Channel?
LOL.
Boris, the One-eyed oracle.
Does this mean anything to you?
That wasn't it.
I don't remember.
Poor Boris.
I think Boris must have had a moment.
Boris, thank you for your interest in our show.
Yeah, it wasn't two.
I remember something like that,
but it wasn't Two Knobs and One Channel.
Ah, yeah.
Huh.
Maybe he's got it a little bit wrong.
Although maybe he's right.
Who knows?
He's probably got a better memory
than we do at this point.
All right. So there's one more a little bit wrong. Although maybe he's right. Who knows? He's probably got a better memory than we do at this point. All right.
So there's one more question, I promise.
And this is somebody who calls herself a hundy pea, okay?
Which means she never misses a Humble and Friend show.
She's a big fan of yours.
And I actually, she sent in the question,
and I actually said I'm not going to read that.
Don't worry.
We're not hitting below the belt here or anything.
Don't get scared.
But I said I'm not reading that question
because I don't think it'd be appropriate for me to read this question and then she recorded it and sent it in so this
is not me talking i'm going to play it again uh it's just a it's a fair question i don't i want
to play it because i promised i would so here we go a listener of humble and fred hi hundy p here
i'm just wondering why you two have so much trouble giving Mike credit for the things he does.
He has no problem giving you guys the credit about how he started in podcasting,
but you guys always seem to shit on him.
I'm wondering why.
Well, may I have this?
First of all, that's crazy.
Ah, fuck. You know, that's not fair. Way to go, Mike. What did that's fucked you know that's not fair way to go
mike what did i do no i'm it's not fair that i told her i wouldn't read it it's not fair to
because we don't shit on you you know how many times how many times we've said on our show we
wouldn't even be in business if it wasn't for you i thought i'd just get the first crack at this i
can't be clear enough about this fact i can't be clear enough though that i don't share this opinion
i know but it's not fair for her to say that
because he said it a hundred times.
I've said it a hundred times.
Whenever you're on, we celebrate you.
And if she is a Hunty P, and that's great,
but then how she could be a Hunty P
and not hear how we celebrate you,
I have no other response
other than we have celebrated your help with us.
How do we shit on you?
I wish she was here.
No, you would never shit on that.
That's a good thing for the world.
How do we shit on you?
I honestly,
so she submits the question, okay,
in the open mic, in the turn mic.
And I said,
I can't read that.
First of all,
if I read that thing,
I think that's coming from me.
That was my big fear.
They're going to think I made up
that this is somebody.
Well, you wouldn't make that up.
But, you know, if you wanted to stir shit, you might make something up. And I said, I don't want to be accused's coming from me. That was my big fear. They're going to think I made up that this is somebody. Well, but you wouldn't make that up. But,
you know,
if you wanted to stir shit,
you might make something up.
And I said,
I don't want to be accused of that.
Of course,
it wasn't true.
And so I said,
you can,
you know,
it has to come from your voice
if you want to submit that.
So that's,
she sent me that clip.
She is a honey pea.
She listens to every minute
of your show.
And this is her feeling.
And I don't share it,
but I promised her I'd play it.
And again,
I don't reflect that.
I'll answer it because we're pricks.
How's that?
We're just pricks.
That's why.
Geeks that groove.
Thanks for doing this.
Don't hit your head when you stand up it'll hurt and that brings us to
the end of our 531st show you can follow me on twitter i'm at toronto mike humble and fred are
at humble fred radio our friends at great lakes brewery are at great lakes beer. Palma Pasta is at Palma Pasta. Sticker U is at Sticker U.
Brian Master, he's at LetsGetYouHome
at kw.com if you want to get on his mailing list.
Capadia LLP is at Capadia LLP.
And Pumpkins After Dark
are at PumpkinsAfterDark.com.
See you all next week. And drink some good ass from a tin Cause my UI check has just come in
Ah, where you been?
Because everything is kind of rosy and green
Yeah, the wind is cold but the snow wants me to dance
And your smile is fine and it's just like mine