Tosh Show - My Cookie Dealer - Courtney Cowan

Episode Date: July 23, 2024

Daniel sweet talks the former proprietor of his favorite cookie shop, LA’s dearly departed Milk Jar.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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You can listen to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions, sponsored by Gilead, now on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Thursday. Meet the real woman behind the tabloid headlines in a personal podcast that delves into the life of the notorious Tori Spelling, as she takes us through the ups and downs

of her sometimes glamorous, sometimes chaotic life in marriage. I just filed for divorce. Whoa, I said the words that I've said, like, in my head for, like, 16 years. Wild. Listen to Miss Spelling on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Our iHeartRadio Music Festival, presented by Capital One, September 20th and 21st. T-Mobile Arena here in Las Vegas. Stream live only on Hulu. Don't miss Big Sean, Camila Cabello, Togekat, Dua Lipa, Gwen Stefani, Halsey, Hosier, Keith Urban, New Kids on the Block, Paramore, Shaboosie, The Black Crocs, Thomas Redd, Victoria Monet, and more. Buy tickets now at AXS.com. Go through your top five favorite cookie flavors

that came from your store. I think if I had to choose one forever, and I could only ever have it, it'd be chocolate chip walnuts. Hate nuts in my cookies? Hate nuts, okay, got it. I mean, I like nuts, but I like it. But not in the cookie.

But not in the dessert. Nuts are for when I'm like on a trail. And even then I'm just eating the M&M's. Totally. Totally. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show.

Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show.

It's Tuesday, the second day of the week. As we all know, on the second day, God created the sky. I, on this second day, put forth a new episode and it was good. Amen. Welcome to Toss Show. Huh? That's how you get us started, Eddie. It is how you get us started.

A little blessing. Let people know where we came from. We came from? The bottom. Adam and Eve. Yep. Right, they were there at the bottom. Who made you?

I was ripped from the... God. What else did God make? All things. Things that were around us. You never were forced to memorize the shorter catechism? Nope. Oh boy.

Well, I'm in a sour mood. I know. We're going to get some feedback from the audience. Feedback, buddy. Here we go. Let's start. Hold on. Hold on.

I'm not ready. I've got to mentally prepare for feedback from our viewers and our listeners. Subscribers. Some of our fans. Are they subscribing? Not at record pace. I'm told if we don't get our subscriber numbers up, that means they stay the same. I'd like our subscriber numbers to go down. I'd like people to unsubscribe. See if we can get that number back to zero. Be sure to unsubscribe. See if we can get that number back to zero.

Be sure to unsubscribe. I want to see if we can get our show up to five million subscribers and then I want to do the show and take it down to zero. I don't know if it's possible. I don't know if anybody's ever accomplished that. Got five million subscribers and then got it back down to zero just through good old fashion hate. Speaking of vitriol, just through good old fashioned hate. Speaking of vitriol, let's hear from our fans.

Here we go. I hate you, Daniel Tosh. How dare you advertise in the middle of a podcast? I feel you, buddy. You know, my goal for this podcast, I've said this since day one, has always been to create a place for advertisers and consumers to just vibe.

Next one, Tasha's kid loves telling stories about Lake Tahoe. It's a total flex and he doesn't even know it. Now he knows it. Once someone asked my son in the jacuzzi, we were sitting in a jacuzzi, a public jacuzzi, it was like a Four Seasons, they asked him if his jacuzzi at home was hotter than this. And he said, are you talking about Malibu or Tahoe?

They just stand there like, ah. Huh? That's my bougie boy. That's my bougie boy. I feel like this show could be improved upon if you added another border or two. Were you the border patrol? I knew that the borders would be a game changer. The first big marketing meeting that we sat in. Right, I remember this.

We were like, they kept pitching us all kinds of things to make the show stand out. And when that one team from San Francisco, from Silicon Valley, just like, listen, it's just borders. All of our research is showing that if you make borders around your podcast, the sky's the limit. I'm glad we listened to them. We paid them, what did we pay them for that first border?

It was $85,000. $85,000 for the first version of the border. We said no to that one. Then we went to a different firm. They actually charged us less. 38,000. 38,000, but gave us just a beautiful thick border. I hope it lives on forever.

I wish your audio was more bassy. I use headphones that amplify bass and this podcast sounds very flat and weird through them. Can't you just adjust the bass on your end? You have to understand, I got Dylan back there. This guy can barely tell his left foot from his right. So give him an audio request. His phone on complete deaf ears.

You may not even be rolling right now. Good chance this doesn't even air. When Eddie is giving his father's eulogy, Daniel should shout, Shanausagus three times. Test his commitment to the bit. All right, you spelled Shanausagus wrong, first of all. Also, Shanausagus is-

Hi everybody, I'm Daniel, it's Shenazigus. Eddie? Technically you said the first one, so that doesn't count. No, you got me on technicality, bye everybody. Eddie, I hope you have to start doing that on stage for 45 minutes every night of your life. If somebody, if people start heckling your show with that, that'll be true heaven.

Just people start saying, Chanel is a ghost in the theater. Uh, all right. This is from the Michelle We episode when he gave her cookies. Okay. Milk jar cookies closed as of January 15th. How old is this episode you're serving up?

All right, that's true. We pre-recorded some of these and sadly, yes, they did close. And the entire Tosh family is still in mourning. So much so that today I've decided to get to the bottom of it. Enjoy. Back in 1969, this was the hottest song around. Back in 1969, this was the hottest song around. It's the time of the season

So hot that some guys from Michigan tried to steal it. It's the time of the season for the beast My name is Daniel Ralston. For 10 years I've been obsessed with one of the most bizarre and audacious cons in rock and roll history. A group would have a hit record and quickly they would hire a bunch of guys to go out and be the group. People were being cheated on several levels.

After years of searching, we bring you the true story of the fake zombies. I was like blown away. These guys are not gonna get away with it. Listen to the true story of the fake zombies on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine having more time to yourself this evening while waking to a happy, well-rested child tomorrow.

Welcome to Sleep Tight Stories, this evening while waking to a happy, well-rested child tomorrow. Welcome to Sleep Tight Stories, a calming bedtime podcast that brings cuddles and comfort to families worldwide. Each episode is narrated by me, Cheryl McCloud, a second grade teacher, and written by my husband Clark, a second grader at heart. and written by my husband Clark, a second grader at heart. Our stories spark imagination without over-stimulation. Many listeners report falling asleep within 10 minutes of tuning in, leaving parents with more time to decompress after a busy day. When your child is rested, you will be too. Listen to Sleep Tight Stories on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Sleep Tight.

Between work, the gym, family. I am overwhelmed. Sis, are you feeling overwhelmed? You're not alone. I'm Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, licensed psychologist and host of the Therapy for Black Girls podcast. And I'm bringing candid mental health conversations straight to your podcast feed. We'll unpack everything from conquering imposter syndrome to nurturing your friendships. Join me and my expert guests as we explore mental health and personal development. Whether you're just starting your mental health journey, entering motherhood, thinking about becoming a therapist, or just trying to show up as the best possible version of yourself. Listen to Therapy for Black Girls on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. -♪ Pasha! -♪ Today's guest is a woman after my own heart, based solely on her quitting her job in television to spend the next 10 years owning and running one of my favorite cookie shops. Please welcome Courtney. Hello.

Courtney, I'm gonna be honest with you. This is arguably the most important interview I've ever done. Cookies mean more to me than my family. Same. So let's waste no time. Where are you originally from and have you always been obsessed with cookies?

I was born in Fort Worth, Texas, and then we moved to Indiana, a suburb of Indianapolis when I was born in Fort Worth, Texas, and then we moved to Indiana, a suburb of Indianapolis when I was seven. And then I moved out here when I was 22, so I've been here longer than I've been anywhere else. But you grew up in Indianapolis, basically. I did. I didn't answer your second question,

which is have I always been obsessed with cookies? Yes, I have been. Okay. So when I was a kid, my mom taught me the basics of baking, and I really loved cookie dough, and so that was pretty much what I would be doing if I wasn't in school or in gymnastics. I was making cookie dough.

Gymnastics. I was a gymnast. Your competitive gymnast, your father coached the US men's team? He was in charge of men's gymnastics. He was the men's program administrator for US gymnastics. Your mother competed as well? She was. She was state champion in Texas.

How tall are you? Five two. You are? Mm hmm. You look taller. That's how I carry myself up here. You do? You carry yourself taller? I wouldn't have pegged you to five two.

Yeah. My wife's five two. She pretends like that's tall. But, you were trying to 14? Yeah, got injured. Did you? What kind of injury?

It's like hips, like hip, they never really identified it, but I just like, I couldn't really Did you? What kind of injury? It's like hips, like hip, they never really identified it, but I just like, I couldn't really lift my right leg above. What was your best event? Probably vault and floor. The vault. Yeah. It's so exciting.

It's so exciting. And everything can go wrong. Everything, so bad. So fast. Just the way you run at it makes me laugh every time. It's just like, just this angry run. I mean, it is a sprint, and then you run at it makes me laugh every time. It's just like, just this angry run. I mean, it is a sprint.

And then you just hope for the best. How much money, and is it possible, could I pay you to full steam run and do the vault right now? Could you run, hit it, and do something? That's a really great question. I don't know. I could run. Would you be scared? I could jump on the board. I would be scared. Oh man, it'd be so great. I don't know. I could run. I could jump on the board.

I would be scared. I would be scared. I feel like I could do, I don't know. You think you could flip? No, I really want to try. I don't know. Put a price tag on that and come back to me. I grew up, you know, in love with cookies.

My grandfather was a baker. My grandfather was a professional baker. My dad was a professional baker. My dad was a novice. Just, you know, he grew up because of his dad. So I just second-handed it. The amount of raw dough that I've consumed in my life is... If it could kill you, I'd be dead a thousand times. I'm like, that's the only reason I made cookie dough. That could explain my stomach issues my whole life. You just have like a normal,

like a regular salmonella case all the time. I'm running at a low, just above, barely traceable. God is like, here we go again. What did you move to Los Angeles for? To work in TV. What aspect? Well, I got a job. I have one of those stories where my aunt

worked with a guy whose daughter worked out here. So my sophomore year of college, I cold called her and just tried to get advice. And so then whenever it came time for me to graduate, she was being promoted from post production coordinator to supervisor. So I flew out the day after I graduated from college, interviewed for the post coordinator position, had no idea what I was doing, but they took a chance on me. And yeah, did that for... That's kind of one of my favorite things about Los Angeles that doesn't get enough attention,

is the amount of jobs in show business that will give people that have no experience. I mean, they turn over the keys to young people doing really important things on stuff. Just a lot of times, like on hype and stuff. That's kind of a neat thing. I don't know. Anyway, all right, so how long did you work in that world?

12 years. 12, did you hate it or love it? I loved it. I mean, it was hard. There were particular shows that would be like, I hate this. You worked on the porn show? It was hard. You know, there were there were particular shows that would be like, I hate this. You worked on the porn show.

Hung. Hung. Technically not porn. No, but that was the one show every morning they made me go to the post-production facility and watch dailies. And I was like, coffee in my morning porn, you know, like, it's so early to see DONG and it was not great. But yeah, I really loved it

But then it was like I did the cookies on the side for the last seven years of that career And just kind of kept going back and forth You just started bringing your cookies in or you always knew that you your cookies were a level above what other people do No, it really was like bringing them in and because I you know Single girl in my 20s is just bake at night and bring them in. You know, as single girls do, I don't, is that something? That's what I did, I'm a nerd though, I don't know. I love it.

Yeah, so I would just bring them in and then I started hearing kind of rumblings of like, hey, what bakery are these cookies from? Those are so good. And so then I just started thinking there was something to it. And it was always just chocolate chip at the time. And then I just started experimenting with other flavors

and I loved that creative outlet. And then I was like, maybe I'll try to do something. So I started a cookie company out of the coat closet of my one bedroom apartment and just like shoved a fax machine in there. It was very high tech. And just kind of did it on the side for a while. For seven years before they opened

the first brick and mortar. opened the first brick and mortar? Was the first brick and mortar the one on Wilshire? Yeah, it's April 2013. And you ran that one for 10 years. Pandemic, writer's strike. All of it. Writer's strike was a surprising one that affected you. If you have a soap box, I'll get on it for a little while.

Feel free. But no, it's really interesting because there's been so little awareness of how deeply that impacted small businesses in this city. So, like, what took us out is not unique to us. You know, we were a very successful, beloved business and it just, 30% of our revenue went away overnight because we did so much catering to sets and, you know, gifts for agents and

managers and it was just like, you like, there was so much of it. And then that was gone for, and it still hasn't really come back. You know, production is not. Now that I realize I don't have to buy gifts for my agents and managers. You're like saving that money. But like the entire, it wasn't just the writers

and the actors, we know that. The whole city wasn't working. And so those people are also not spending money. So the foot traffic had never fully recovered since COVID, but then, and then whatever cookies we were selling, because we were very in support of the strike. I think it was a really important thing. And we would not just support it as a concept,

but pass out cookies at the picket lines and all that stuff. But then you're offering discounts to writers and actors that come in with their cars. So it was just everything kind of trickled down and, um, yeah, just ended up impacting us in a big way. You were in the process or you'd already opened the Pasadena location? Um, in Sino. In Sino.

Yeah. Um, no, that's okay. Um, we opened right when the strike started. It should have been the previous August. So it should have been a six month build out. I budgeted for nine and it took 15. That just kind of gave us no prayer. The nightmare of building and stuff like that.

It's just plan for four months, but then be like, all right, two years seems right. That seems reasonable. Do you believe in ghosts? Oh man. It's funny, I just was in Sacramento and my friend has a ghost hunting app. And she has that.

And she's single? No. Oh. No. There's someone for everyone. There's someone for everyone. So I don't know, I believe in energy. Like I think we're all energy.

Sorry if I doze off. No, it's okay. But I don't know, like I've never had a ghost experience. But this friend of mine that has the ghost hunting app. They have an app, so that's. No, but she got the app because she had this experience in Scotland in an old inn where there was like the sound of like someone jumping

on the bed and this like, and a child giggle. Oh, you don't like, I never like ghost with kids. That's all I- It feels a little freaky, yeah. One time I terrified my wife's cousin. She was staying in a small little cabin that we had and I put a knife under her pillow and I put these little notes all around the bed.

That's called a psycho killer, not a ghost. With crayons, and I wrote, give me back my dress. Amanda, bring me my dress, and all these old, old photos of the house, my dress. Please, ha ha ha, the lake is cold, help my dress. Please, ha ha ha. The lake is cold. Help my dress. But a knife under the pillow might have been a touch too far.

No, no, it was, it was, she, cause she didn't find that until she like laid down, then she goes, and then there's a fucking knife under my pillow. Amanda, knife. Scary as fuck. And then when she went into the bathroom,

I had, I had a doll hanging by a noose in her shower. Oh my God. Oh my God. And she couldn't imagine. That's amazing. She just couldn't handle to what levels I took. That's so funny. Yeah.

Had you ever seen me walk into your store? I hadn't. Okay. No. I was always incognito, but I would illegally park out front, just double park in front of somebody. I didn't like the parking situation.

It actually infuriated me to be honest with you. Sometimes I would say to myself, I'm like, I don't need to be doing this right now. I'm driving around for a cookie and I'm looking for a parking spot. It did get bad. We had three spots in the back and there was a rear entrance, but then there was a public parking lot on Cochrane and then metered all along Cochrane, Dunsmear and Wilshire. I've walked there before in my life from Carly's old house,

which is basically by like the Melrose Improv, the comedy. Oh, that's a walk. You were in that cookie. It's a real walk. I walked the whole way. I was like, ah, this is awful. Going through whatchamacallit park, Pan-Asian,

what's it called? Pan-Pacific. Pan-Pacific. Yeah. Yeah. Pan-Asian. Pan-Pacific. Pan-Asian. Pan-Pacific.

Pan-Pacific, you know what I mean. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's great. Whatever, I'm walking through, I'm going through the La Brea Tar Pits to get a goddamn cookie. Yeah. I admire that.

You were open till 11 o'clock at night, and I couldn't wrap my head around that. Oh, it was a party in there. It's too long. Before I opened, I was like, there's never a place, like after you go to dinner and a movie, do you want to like go get something sweet or a cup of coffee?

Yeah, that place is bad. What is wrong with you? Yeah, it was great. People were looking for a place to go and we were crossing the L-ray. So I was like after a show, people could come over. Those were my favorite nights. And there was just like an energy, it was a party,

it was so fun. Are you like a donut maker? Are you baking once or are you baking throughout the whole day? Throughout the day. Okay. Yeah, COVID changed things because for two years, everything was, because we already individually wrapped

and stuff if it was in a gift box, but then everything was individually wrapped. I'm also, let me continue with something, because your next chapter is going to be exciting. So I want to get as much feedback in as I can. Perfect. Knock it off the stupid, that paper. I hate it.

The shred. Oh, fuck your shred. I know. That's so much. I have an amazing story. This lady came in and she was just so mad. This was years ago. And she was like, I don't want those red!

And she was so mad, and my employee, and I got in late on the situation, because it would have been like, just take the shred, it's fine, it's like that, but my employee was doing what they were trained to do. She handed her the box, and the woman takes it, and just starts going, and throwing it in the employee's face.

And I was like, it's too far. I love this person, but that's way too far. You agree with her, but not the way she feels it. In principle. Exactly, but I was like, oh God, if anyone ever says no shred, don't give them the shred. It's fine. First of all, that's the worst part

of a small business is employees. It's difficult. It's just a nightmare. It can also be the most rewarding. Okay, but let's focus on the negative. All right. It's hard, it's hard. Right, the individually rewarding. Okay. But let's focus on the negative. All right? It's hard, it's hard. The individually wrapping. Like, oh, why did I order a dozen?

This is just fucking throw them into a, I'm going to coworkers, I'll just open it up. Just the individual bags. Yeah, I know. Like, come on. It's like, so that because if you take a variety and somebody's got a peanut allergy and now you've got this.

I don't give a shit, I hope they die for their stupid allergy. These are my employees that I'm giving it to. I don't care what happens to them. Go through your top five favorite cookie flavors that came from your store. I think if I had to choose one forever, and I could only ever have it,

it'd be chocolate chip walnut. Used to just be chocolate chip, but there's something magical that that walnut oil like does to the dough even. Hate nuts in my cookies. Okay, got it. I mean, I like nuts, but not in the dessert. Nuts are for when I'm like on a trail.

And even then I'm just eating the M&M's. Totally. Okay, I think banana split. Sorry again, walnuts in it. But no, the banana split was banana split. I could have it was that was a fancy concept, but I'll be honest, the nuts were like, oh my gosh. Yeah. Can I, can I do seasonals as well? Of course. Peppermint bark. Yep. I love peppermint bark. I love peppermint. Picnic cookie. What, was that the one that had pretzel bits in it? Yeah.

I really loved the oatmeal chocolate chip. Yep. But I would want to walk in there and be like, hey, you know that batch that needs two more minutes? That's the one you want? Let's pull it out now. Yeah, the oatmeal, they got a little dry faster. Yeah.

Yeah. I always do double parchment paper. Oh. And the reason is I just don't want the bottom burnt at all or dark or anything. So that's my thing with parchment. I just live by parchment paper. Double parchment, that's a baller move, double parchment.

Well, I'm gonna take that. You gotta spend to make. Yeah. The birthday cookie was one of my favorite with a scoop of vanilla ice cream warmed. I would heat it up. It reheats very nicely. I'm on tour.

I was in Texas, I believe at the time. Anyway, my tour bus in the daytime near my hotel, pitch black, it's not, and Pete, who's a producer on the show, his wife, who was a comedy writer of mine, writer and a friend, she was on tour. Well, she came to the bus in the middle of the day to do something, and she opens the door,

and I'm alone in the bus, in the dark, just eating a cookie by myself, and she's like, you really have a problem. It's like, I was just the afternoon cookie. Is it a problem or is it just a self care? You charge three to $4 a cookie during its peak. How much money were you printing? Like that's such a small amount of money for like,

you know, yearly you make a point, there's like a million dollars off of a three to four dollar product. That's very impressive. We sold a lot. In terms of flavors, which cookies were selling the most? Chocolate chip was definitely the most popular. And then banana split. So people love a classic, but they like the adventure too. And then birthday cookie. That actually started as a seasonal. I don't know if you remember that. It was the monthly flavor for our first anniversary

in 2014. And then after that, it was the one, everybody's like, where's the birthday cookie? Well, in fairness, sometimes you would, I would go in there and be like, there'd be a birthday cookie disguised as a Halloween cookie. We would change the color of the sprinkles.

It's true, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Well, it's fine. That's fine. I actually don't like the color of the sprinkles. It's true, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Well, it's fine. That's fine. I actually don't like the color orange and black, but whatever. I liked the other color was prettier. And also would make, when it was heated

and you put a scoop of vanilla ice cream, it would do some- Oh, so picturesque. It would do some nice stuff to the ice cream. It's really nice, yeah. I appreciate your appreciation for the aesthetic. It's good, it's good. What's your favorite holiday?

Christmas. I take over at Christmas in my house. I do a few things. I do a few traditional things. I do a shortbread. You don't mess with shortbread. I do one shortbread. But then I do this bar, peanut butter pudding chocolate bar.

And then I do my regular traditional Christmas cookie, which I actually love, which is obvious. Like the roll out cut out ones? Yeah. That's fun. I do a little orange peel in there. Very nice. Yeah, that adds.

You can taste that orange peel, can't you Pete? In the peanut butter bar? No, oh my god, not even paying attention over there. I wanna talk about Yelp. You ran a business in Los Angeles during the time of Yelp. Talk a little about the bullshit with reviewers and navigating those waters. Oh, man, you live and die by Yelp. You really do.

For the most part, people were so kind to us on Yelp. We never had a marketing budget ever. It was all organic growth. And so a lot of that was because of Yelp and people being so generous as to take pictures and post them and do wonderful reviews. And then you have the ones that are just so off base and not accurate at all. As an owner, did you reply to people? Because I always feel that that is tough

when I start seeing owners going back and forth with people. Oh, it would never be like, you're wrong. I mean, you're just asking for more. I would reply because I always wanted to make it right. The fact that they had chosen Milk Jar Cookies to come and spend their hard-earned money and their time, and that was never anything I took lightly. My money was not hard-earned, just for the record.

But it was just, and that was something the staff was always, it was just like, this is a privilege that they are choosing us. Some people you're never going to please and that's fine. It's the people that are like one star because parking was terrible. Right. You know, it's like, that's not our problem. That's why I don't find Yelp useful. No.

I look at it. I have my own metric of how I gauge it. But like, if somebody's complaining about the price or the portion size, I don't care. I'm like, I don't care. I need the review to be like, oh, they won't serve Asians. And they'll be like, oh, that's terrible. That's a bad place. I shouldn't support them. Right.

What is that place that won't serve Asians again? I mean... You shipped worldwide? Not worldwide, but nationwide. At one point, we were able to ship to Canada easily. And then 2016, some things changed and... You're a big anti-vaxxer, right? Totally. But yeah, no, we did...

It included Hawaii and Alaska, which we did ship to, and Puerto Rico. We had a Cookie of the Month Club member in Puerto Rico. I gifted a box of your cookies to Michelle Wee, who I've interviewed on this show. Oh really? Yes, but that was in protest from my wife, because my wife would get so mad every month

when the box came, because she was like, you're going to die. She was like, you don't need to, but somebody had gifted me, because she was like, you're going to die. Like, she's like, we don't need, you don't need to, but somebody had gifted me. So I was like, yeah, every month I got a box. What are you gonna do? Are there any current cookie companies you would recommend?

Yeah, it's interesting because, I mean, I'm a cookie lover. Of course, I think mine are the best, but I will eat, you know eat a grocery store bakery cookie. I have recently stopped. If I bite a cookie that I no longer want to eat, before I just eat it. Right. Now it's not worth it.

Here's another problem with when you love cookies and then everybody buys you cookies. It's like, oh, we're going to give you a lot. Well, I don't want a lot. Because now I have to either do the stupid freezer thing or I have to start devouring. Right. And I don't like to give away, but it's like, and they're only really the best day one and day two. Yeah.

So now it's just, I'm just sick to my stomach anyway. All right. That's my soap box. So, yes. So I've, and during like the course of our shutdown and, you know, selling off all the things, I got to meet several other bakery owners, which was a nice gift. So there's one in Culver City

called The Very Best Cookie Company. There is a new one, I think it's called Fleur et Sel. What is it? It's French. Fleur et Sel. What is that, flour and salt? I don't know. Don't like them, but I'm gonna talk.

Don't like it. And then there is Cookie Good in Santa Monica. So all of these are independently owned. What's his name over there? John, he likes Zouis. I have not ever tried Zouis. I've tried them. They're fine.

I still can't get over the fact that you're going into a gas station to buy. It's not the most aesthetically pleasing. Right. They are good. I've had a few of them are good. You fuck with Girl Scout cookies? I do.

I was a Girl Scout. Top selling cookies, of course. What was your favorite one? Thin Mint. Did you have to put it in the freezer? Oh, for sure. There's so much better in the freezer. And I like a Samoa.

I like a Samoa too. And there's room for a do-si-do. The little peanut butter sandwich thing. I don't love it. Yeah, it's okay. The tree foil. Tree foil? Yeah.

I liked it. Yeah, shortbread can't go wrong. Do you ever do mess with shortbread? Your store? I don't, no. Your store didn't? We did chewy cookies. I don't like a hard cookie.

I don't either. That's why most of Girl Scouts were awful. Your store didn't. Mm-mm. We did chewy cookies. I don't like a hard cookie. I don't either. That's why most of Girl Scouts were awful. Yeah. Cookies. There's a place for it, you know? What's the difference between baking soda and baking powder? Baking powder has other things in it. So it's got baking soda and it has, I wanna say some corn starch and I'm a terrible baker.

I can't remember the third ingredient, but anyway. They're kind of interchangeable. Can baking powder keep your cabinets fresh? I don't think, you know, I can't remember the third ingredient. But anyway, they're kind of interchangeable. But like. Can baking powder keep your cabinets fresh? I don't think, you know, I don't think so. That's where baking soda wins. That's baking soda, that was a marketing genius right there. So, so genius.

You know what, buy these and just don't use them. A little arm and hammer. Uh-huh. What do you bake besides cookies? I have, I like, I love to. I mean, I'm not great. Like I'm a terrible decorator, like icing and frosting. I like cake without icing. Yeah, I like just the cake.

I had a naked cake for my wedding. Oh really? Yeah. I like pie a lot. What kind of pie is you making? Usually like a fruit pie. So like mixed berry. I like a heavy crumble.

Yes. And that's the whole point. It's kind of like you get the crumble. Yes. That's the whole point. It's kind of like you get the fruit, but like that's the good part. You know, like the brown sugar and the crust and all that. Not big on like a pumpkin pie. No, it's disgusting. Yeah.

It's the worst. I don't want to eat a rhubarb pie either. That's too much. It's overwhelming. You like it? I don't like rhubarb. No, it's disgusting. What if it's mixed with strawberry? No.

No, not even. Okay. Strawberry pie. It's so, oh. Hey, what are you doing the rest of the day? I don't know. I'll be shitting. I just had a small slice of strawberry pie.

Strawberry pie. Just so much. You like sidecar donuts you ever had there? I like sidecar donuts. You don't like them? It's a bit much. You like sidecar donuts you ever had there? I like sidecar donuts. You don't like them? It's a bit much. They have a cookie dough.

They have a cookie dough donut. See, I don't mess with that. Did you have it? No. I used to eat it. I used to eat it. You did? Okay. I know. I'm like, I'll go into a diabetic coma.

Like if I eat that, it's too much. Do you guys know that it's got a ball of cookie dough inside a huge thick cake donut. No, I love their regular just like cake donut, the blueberry one, great. Good stuff. I went through a phase with that donut. That's amazing.

No, I know, it's embarrassing. Listen, what are you gonna do? We've all got our things. We do. You brought cookies today? I did. I brought a birthday and chocolate chip. I, this morning, made cookies for you. Oh, that's great.

But, I mean, it's terrifying. But I tried to make a cookie that was like, I was like, I don't want to make something similar. But, and then my wife's like, don't do that cookie. And I'm like, oh, and she's, so she made me do her favorite cookie. Okay. This was, I did, this is oatmeal chocolate chip.

But another thing that my wife forces me to do, she hates chocolate chips. and we do her favorite cookie. This was, I did, this is oatmeal chocolate chip, but another thing that my wife forces me to do, she hates chocolate chips in quantity. So I have to put like four or three per cookie. Okay? Got it. Now again, all right, whatever. I'm too much, you just have to taste it

and do a review of my cookie on some level. Okay. Okay, it's got the crisp outer, but you can tell the inside. I feel like you should go for more of an inner bite, but that's, no, that's fine, you do you, you do you, no. No, I, I mean, I think you got some of it here. Oh my God, it's good.

That's good. That's good. It's not too sweet. I like a balanced flavor. That's why I always had not overly sweet cookies. I like that. You put a banana inside your cookie. And salt. Do you bake with salted butter or unsalted?

Unsalted. Yeah, and then add the salt. Totally. Oh man, that's stressful. That's so stressful. That's good. All right. That's a good cookie.

Even for a thin cookie. I know. Which is hard to do to keep it doughy. I was going. Thank you. I was going to, and I do the bang. You know. The bang?

The bang where you do. Oh with the. Yeah, I do that during the process. Yeah. It's almost, I almost feel like, did you ever watch Grace British Bake Off? Oh, I love it. I almost felt like that was, I love it.

That was like my handshake moment. Oh, Paul Hollywood handshake. Oh man. That's my dream. You would like to go on that show? No, I just want to handshake Paul Hollywood. That show would be so, I mean it would be so fun and they're so sweet to each other.

They're so sweet. I I love it so much. When somebody's bad, I almost am excited. I can't wait to see this disaster. Have you ever been on a show? No. Would you? I don't know, it's scary. I don't like, I get why they have to do it for television.

I don't want to care about a time element. You won because you finished on time. But somebody else took four more minutes and it was the best cookie in the world. Right. Well, I got a problem. Yeah, exactly. That's not right. Let me see your cookies. Just, I like the idea that this is, uh, Oh, I'm going to say this out loud. The chocolate chip, these look better than some of the store bought ones.

I mean, yeah, quality controls a bitch. The lightness of the color is what I like. Yeah. Now, in the store, they were sprinkled in the bottom of these. No. Whoa. Sometimes they would like,

No, all the time. No. Well then the kitchen was not doing it properly. They were, the bottom was never clean like that. Well I just have the touch. Haven't lost it. I actually took a picture this morning and sent it to my friend, I was like, still got it.

Ha! That's so funny. Well I wanna go chocolate chip just because I'm in the mood for chocolate chip right now. I don't want my memory there. Is that so funny, Pete? How often did you see those cookies? You sort of left out of the tour bus story

as you flew across the country with enough to last you the tour. You did, that's so great. Thank you. I did, no one wants to touch them. These are mine. Hey, I'm gonna share. There you go.

You have a dog? I do. What's your dog's name? Ollie. How old? 13. Uh oh. He's a handsome devil though.

You're about to not have a dog. Stop it! That's terrible. I know, but that's- The day I brought him home, I was like, he's gonna die someday. It's the worst joke. That's what I do.

That's why I have two dogs. You have a 14 year old dog at home. And let me tell you something. She will get trapped under a chair. She can just walk out, but she'll be frozen for 45 minutes. And I'm just like, oh, come on. And then she can't hear, she doesn't really see. And then sometimes she'll start running as fast as she can,

right into a glass door. Just, it's just awful. You're like, oh, this is bad. He's hanging in there right now. He's a pretty healthy dog. I have another gift for you. It's no good though. It's no good.

It's dog beds. Amazing. You're gonna get them all. This is no good, I don't like this. So that when I get more dog, what are you doing? Oh my God. I always give people stuff that are on my show, but, all right, let me put these down, hold on.

Some of these are nice. They are. Not all of them, but these are nice. Carl, why didn't you like these? Carl refuses to sleep in a dog bed, no matter what. My other dog refuses to sleep in a dog bed. I'm like, why do we have these dog beds? What's next for you as someone

who's already had two full careers? Are you hanging up the apron or are you ready to bake once more? I think I'm hanging it up, I don't know that I ever need to have another bakery and own that kind of business. And I've become very passionate about advocating and supporting small business as a whole.

And so I've been having a lot of conversations about ways to do that. So whether it's running for office or- You're gonna run for office? I don't know, it's an option. Oh my goodness. No, I mean, that's incredible. I don't know why that's my reaction.

Because it's a chit show and it's a cesspool in a lot of ways. But you know, it's a concept I have. A necessity? But I think there are other ways to make change as well. So I'm just kind of trying to figure out what that is. I did a program with Goldman Sachs in 2020 that was essentially a micro MBA that you apply for. And you just come out of the program with a five-year growth plan for your business.

And they have an advocacy side that's 10,000 small business voices. And so I've been talking with them a lot, trying to figure out if there's opportunity there. Or I just think that it's the lifeblood of every community is the small businesses. And they're struggling everywhere, but especially here. If you have another soapbox, I have that.

No, listen, if you have even any ideas to fix the broken system, that seems like work that would be appreciated. But would you ever know side hustle bake just like online order type thing? Or is that not? I don't know, because it's so funny. Because if I were to even open that door, like I wouldn't be able to, I would have to have a kitchen. I would have to have, you know, space to do the packaging. Sorry, that individual wrapping to ship them. Gotta have space to store all that shred, you know.

It's a lot. What about already a business that's established, but like you just take over the baking portion of it? Yeah, I also think consulting for small businesses is something that I've thought about doing. And I was kind of doing that offhandedly when people were coming in to purchase stuff. And there's just a lot of,

I think there's a lot of things that have been overlooked with small business and we all just, there's just a lot of, I think there's a lot of things that have been overlooked with small business and we all just, there's not a lot of education out there. And so I- Well, that's why most businesses fail is because everybody goes into a completely blind. Yeah. I was hoping we were gonna brainstorm

on your next big venture, but if it's just fixing every other small business, that's that- No, I'm open to the magic. I really am. All right, guys, we're going to open up a waffle store. Oh, I love, I love a, what you would call it. What's the waffle with the sugar?

And that's the Belgian waffle. Belgian waffle. Yeah. My son once I told him, I go, Hey, they said that you don't need to eat breakfast that you're going to have waffles at school today. You know, he's like four at the time. Yeah. And he goes, but dad, what if they said that you don't need to eat breakfast, that you're gonna have waffles at school today. You know, he was like four at the time. And he goes, but dad, what if they're not Belgian? That's a bougie kid.

That's a bougie kid. That's a big kid, I was like, I love that. I wasn't embarrassed, I was proud. Yeah. I was like, good. Absolutely. Listen, I hope you fix every small business world. That's amazing that that's even something

that you're interested in helping. Thank you for being on the show and I appreciate all your cookies that you've baked over the years for me. Thank you so much for being such a supportive customer. It is much appreciated and thanks for having this, it was really fun. ["It's the Time of the Season"]

Back in 1969, this was the hottest song around. So hot that some guys from Michigan tried to steal it. My name is Daniel Ralston. For 10 years I've been obsessed with one of the most bizarre and audacious cons in rock and roll history. A group would have a hit record and quickly they would hire a bunch of guys to go out and be the group. People were being cheated on several levels.

After years of searching, we bring you the true story of the fake zombies. I was like blown away. These guys are not going to get away with it. Listen to the true story of the fake zombies on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine having more time to yourself this evening while waking to a happy, well-rested child tomorrow. Welcome to Sleep Tight Stories, a calming bedtime podcast that brings cuddles and comfort to families worldwide. Each episode is narrated by me, Cheryl McCloud, a second-grade teacher, and written by my

husband Clark, a second grader at heart. Our stories spark imagination without overstimulation. Many listeners report falling asleep within 10 minutes of tuning in, leaving parents with more time to decompress after a busy day. When your child is rested, you will be too. Listen to Sleep Tight Stories on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your

podcasts. Sleep Tight. Hey fam, I'm Simone Boyce. I'm Danielle Robay. And we're the hosts of The Bright Side, the daily podcast from Hello Sunshine that's guaranteed to light up your day. Every weekday, we bring you conversations

with the culture makers who inspire us. Like our recent episode with comedians and sisters, Amber Ruffin and Lacey Lamar, on fighting racism with humor. It is really sad, and it's really shocking because there are no people funnier than Black women. They don't exist. Find a Black lady librarian.

She will have you rolling. Listen to The Bright Side from Hello Sunshine on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Want to thank Courtney for being on the show. I really do hope she throws away all her aspirations for running for a political office and fixing tons of other small businesses. And I hope she focuses solely on baking. But that's just me and I'm selfish. By the way, Carl, she took all of your beds.

She took your five beds. You have no more beds. You can just sleep wherever you want. No longer will I be forcing you to get into a bed. You just lay down on the floor like you always do. Finally get all that extra floor space back. That'll be nice. And thank you Courtney for the cookies.

Oh, by the way, you know what's funny? So I'm driving here, you know, to Baldwin Hills. Live here. And then I realized, oh no, I forgot to bring the five dog beds that I set out to give away today. And then somebody tells me here, they're like, you know, you can just use Uber. You don't have to put a human in it. You can just hire Uber to deliver your stuff. And I'm like, are you serious? And sure enough, we did it. Just had an Uber driver pick up your dog beds and bring them here. It's like 50 bucks. It's an hour drive. I'm impressed, Uber. Quite a service you came up with there. They ought to give

us money. Give us money, Uber for me. Just plug in your weird What's it called? Uber connect express is what I'm told that sounds like a paid ad. It's not I shouldn't say it the right way It's called uber delivery. Whatever the very least reimburse me the $52. I just spent Plus tip you tip on a package. I guess I don't know how much you tip on a package, I guess. I don't know, how much you tip on that package, Pete? 10 bucks. 10 bucks, it's $62. That's the very least you can do. Don't make this show run in the red.

What do we got to plug? Few things, The Goat, The Reality Show. Still, guys, jump on Prime, check it out, do that thing where you, if you're not a member, you don't have the streaming service, you can like always find a way to get seven days free just with some bogus email I don't know how it works and watch all ten episodes and Hopefully

We'll get back to shooting a new season and you know who I want on the next season of the goat I want some of the cast members from selling the OC. It's like selling Sunset, but instead of just crazy outfits and all girls, there's some guys and then there's some girls, but they don't dress as crazy. And they got their boobs out.

Always, their boobs are always out. Anyway, let's get some of them on the show, on the new season of The Goat. They're pretty crazy. Boyswearpink.com, the toddler clothing line, check that out. Come see me on tour, do standup in San Inez or New Orleans. Come to New Orleans, grab yourself a po'boy and a beignet and have a good laugh.

Or come to Hawaii with me for Thanksgiving I should bring a viewer with me to Hawaii Whole trip you you get it you come with me on the trip and you come to the shows Some shows are in Maui some in Honolulu do the whole thing There's a part of my life you live with me for six months making a viewer that thinks I'm completely out of touch And let. You live with me for six months. Make it a viewer that thinks I'm completely out of touch. Uh, and let them just live with me for six months. I want them to walk six months in my shoes and then, then say, oh, you know what? Turns out that's way better than I thought it was.

You know what? For scratch that. I don't want to do that. Don't let anybody live with me. And nobody comes with me. Maybe I'll meet somebody in Maui. That's what we should do. Somebody who's devastated by the fire,

the fires in Maui a few years ago, we should just take care of one person. I like that. Because it's always like, oh, we donated to whatever. And it's like, it's just spread too thin. I don't have enough money to make it like actually helpful. But if we just pick one person and it's like, here, let's make your holidays better.

Oh, you know what else I've wanted to do? I've always wanted to rent a truck and fill it with turkeys for Thanksgiving. And then go to a real nice neighborhood and give them out. Hey, I bet you they'd like free turkeys for Thanksgiving, and then go to a real nice neighborhood and give them out. I bet you they'd like free turkeys too. Frozen ones are live. I know the live turkeys. If you really want this turkey, you're going to have to work for it.

Well, yeah. And let me tell you something about killing a live turkey. You don't want to let them know that you're killing them because then their meat tenses up, I think. You want to sneak up on them samurai style and just swing. Cause the last thing you want before they die, you don't want their adrenaline to go flying through their muscles.

I don't know if that's true or not, but I think I heard that once on some show that was disgusting. All right. Another bedtime story from my son. I'll see you guys next week. All right, another bedtime story from my son. I'll see you guys next week. All right, go ahead. Once upon a time in a star-ray planet

where they riddled astronauts. They raded so hard but no one came. So, when they needed to talk, when the ship they blasted off in 10 30 minutes all over the world they said and then the astronaut waited and waited and then the water ship came so so anybody within town except the muta beasts So anybody was in town except the Mewda Beasts. And this Mewda Beasts was in Sire, and he broke Sire out. And there was a time the dragon,

he was purple with light on him always. Then when it was nighttime, he got out of the bed, he got out, he went outside and there was a beast, it was called a precinct beast and that precinct beast blew him and turned him into a statue. But this and then he turned back and then he rolled around and the missile beast flew away. And then the astronaut waited and waited. And then they saw another one with a titty cat in it and then they got broken and put to the astronaut they didn't know there was a titty cat in that next astronaut and then the season whistle loudly and then and and then somebody to direct you, the hero says.

And then they all into bed. The end. Curious about queer sexuality, cruising, and expanding your horizons? Hit play on the sex positive and deeply entertaining podcast, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. Join hosts Gabe Gonzalez and Chris Patterson Rosso as they explore queer sex, cruising, relationships and culture in the new iHeart podcast, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions.

Sniffy's Cruising Confessions will broaden minds and help you pursue your true goals. You can listen to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions sponsored by Gilead now on the iHeart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Thursday. Our iHeart Radio Music Festival presented by you get your podcasts. New episodes every Thursday. Our iHeartRadio Music Festival, presented by Capital One, September 20th and 21st.

T-Mobile Arena here in Las Vegas. Stream live only on Hulu. Don't miss Big Sean, Camila Cabello, Togekad, Dua Lipa, Gwen Stefani, Halsey, Hosier, Keith Urban, New Kids on the Block, Paramore, Shaboosie, The Black Crows, Meet the real woman behind the tabloid headlines in a personal podcast that delves into the life of the notorious Tori Spelling, as she takes us through the ups and downs of her sometimes glamorous, sometimes chaotic life

and marriage. I just filed for divorce. Whoa. I said the words that I've said, like, in my head for, like, 16 years. Wild. Listen to Miss Spelling on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.