Tosh Show - My Fictional Language Creator - David Peterson
Episode Date: March 5, 2024Daniel learns more than he ever wanted to know about creating fictional languages for tv and film with professional conlanger David Peterson.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information....
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All right, so when did you create your first language?
And by the way, some of your earlier languages,
do you look back on and go, ooh.
Oh gosh, yeah, of course.
But I created my first language, my second year at Berkeley.
I mean, honey, do you put all the rules into it?
Absolutely, you gotta.
Do you come up with swear words?
Oh, that's usually what they ask for first.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Ta-show!
Ta-show!
Ta-show!
Ta-show!
Hello!
It's me, your host, Daniel, and welcome to Ta-show.
Now hit me with some smooth jazz.
That feels right.
Oh, you're going to keep going.
I get it.
Let it play.
All right, that seems like enough.
Eddie, you with me? I'm with you. Good to hear. Let's start with our
favorite segment, Hello from Toss Show, where I send a personal hello to one of our subscribers.
Now this one comes from Stuart. He's a fan from the United
Kingdom. Whoa! That means the Toss Show is Mr. Worldwide. That's exciting.
Stuart went through some tough times last year, but listening to my
comedy has provided some degree of comfort to him. Well, I don't believe
you, Stuart, but it's a very nice thing to say.
Who else we got? James in Monterey listens with his dad on the way to school.
Oh, my dad and I used to listen to old focus on the family sermons.
Equally impactful, I'd say.
Focus on the family.
Yeah.
Different times. All right, what's going on the Oscars gearing up for the Oscars getting so excited
What's nominated for best picture Eddie? So we got ten of them. Whoa stop there daddy. You just use it ten ten. Holy shit
All right, let's hear what do we got we get American fiction didn't see. Didn't see it. Anatomy of a fall. Didn't see it.
The holdovers.
Didn't see it.
Killers of the flower moon.
Didn't see it.
Maestro.
Didn't see it.
Oppenheimer.
Didn't see it.
Past lives.
Didn't see it.
Poor things.
What was it?
Poor things.
Didn't see it.
The zone of interest.
Oh, God, didn't see it.
Barbie.
All right, that's 10.
That's 10.
Guess what? Guess what?
Guess what?
I'm guessing.
I'm guessing out loud.
I'm gonna guess out loud.
That's 10 and you've seen three.
I said didn't see it.
I didn't see it.
What the fuck's wrong with you?
Idiot.
I saw Barbie.
I saw one of the 10.
This is why I could never host, for a lot of reasons.
But the main reason is I wouldn't even want to watch these movies to write a joke about them.
I saw Barbie. Oh, and here's what I loved about Barbie.
Running Time under two hours.
I guarantee you, what's the running time
on all those movies?
You don't have to tell me, I already know.
Too long, but I saw Barbie.
And guess what, enjoyed it.
Didn't think I was gonna enjoy it.
My wife wanted to watch it, we watched it.
I was like, oh, I love it.
I love Margot Robbie, as most of you know.
Margot Robbie and I would have gotten married
had it not been for the fact that my mother is also know Margot Robbie and I would have gotten married had it not been for the
fact that my mother is also named Margot and that's a deal breaker.
Hey, guess what I just learned?
What?
The other day I had this pondering question and I was like, you know what, I'm going to
look this up and see if it's a thing and sure as shit it is. Some people, when they floss their teeth,
I'm one of them, when you floss your teeth,
your nose itches.
And I was like, this has to be a thing
because every time I floss, my nose really itches.
And apparently, according to this one study that was done,
that there's some wires in your brain
that get mixed up when
you're flossing and it makes you think your nose itches.
Isn't that interesting?
That is.
I thought it was.
What was I talking about?
The Oscars?
That's the problem.
This is the biggest night in Hollywood and I'm way more fascinated by my nose itching
while flossing my teeth.
No, I'm sure those movies were great
and the people, you know,
they did a lot of hard work to make them, whatever.
So there's nine movies.
Or did you see any of those movies?
How many of the 10 did you see, Eddie?
2.5.
Oh, which one of those did you turn off halfway through?
Oppenheimer.
Oppenheimer?
Oppenheimer, Oppenheimer, yeah.
It's Oppenheimer.
Whatever he is. I think we all agree it's Oppenheimer. I don't know, it's Oppenheimer. Openheimer? Openheimer? Oppenheimer? Yeah.
It's Oppenheimer.
Whatever he is.
I think we all agree it's Oppenheimer.
I don't think so.
Sure.
Oppenheimer.
Hey!
I'll tell you what you should do.
Instead of watching Oppenheimer, watch John Wick 4 twice and thank me later.
Let's get this show on the road.
If you watch the Oscars this weekend, you won't see today's guest.
He works on movies and is the best at what he does,
but the Oscars don't have a category for it,
probably because his job is too stupid.
Enjoy.
Hi there, I'm Bob Pittman,
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I'm excited to announce a new season of my podcast,
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Our guests this season remind us to embrace change
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The studios didn't really control the theaters,
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My guest today has created languages for Game of Thrones, Dune, and dozens of other things I've never seen.
He's a nightmare to play Scrabble with and has my favorite made up job.
Please welcome David.
David, thank you for being here.
Thank you for having me.
By the way, I haven't even seen everything that I've worked on. Well, you know what?
I always hate to say this to people.
I hate to be completely honest when it comes to movies
and things like that.
I haven't seen a lot and I don't enjoy watching a ton of stuff.
Sometimes I'll watch them and I'm like,
oh, that was good, that was great.
But yes, I've never seen a frame of Game of Thrones
and it's not my thing. But people always think I'm saying it because I think, oh, I'm too. That was great. But like, yes, I've never seen a frame of Game of Thrones and it's not my thing.
But people always think I'm saying it
because I think, oh, I'm too cool to watch TV.
No, I could, you know, I could watch the Kardashians.
Put that on, I'll find it interesting for a little bit,
I guess.
I like to watch sports.
What am I gonna do?
I am who I am.
No, I get that.
I think that of all the things that I've worked on,
the only things I would have watched probably
are the Marvel movies just because, you know, it was a big thing to go out and see the Marvel
movies and Elemental, the Pixar movie, because I like watching the Pixar movies.
Other than that, probably would not have watched anything that I worked on just on my own.
You were a part of Elemental?
Oh, you bet.
So was Jesse.
My, my fiance, we both worked on it.
Your names?
Oh, Todoribor.
Bash-e-Side.
Elemental has a place in my heart.
Really?
Because it's the first movie that I took my son to see in a theater.
Oh.
We looked at the lineup of what was. We like, we like, we looked at the lineup
of what was coming out and we like,
elemental, that's gonna be the one.
And it was this first, it was a big day.
We built it up for like months and months.
And we went to a theater and it was,
it was like, it was the cutest thing in the world,
watching it.
So now I care about that movie for the rest of my life.
So you are a conilingus.
Am I saying that right?
Con, con, what is it?
No, it's not.
Con-linger or con-linger?
Con-linger.
Con-linger?
Con-ling-linger.
Is that a real thing?
It is now.
It's in the Oxford English Dictionary.
We got it in there.
I have so many questions,
but my first question that I ask all my guests,
do you believe in ghosts?
Absolutely not.
And I wanna go on record and make sure
that everybody knows, no, I do not believe in ghosts,
not one bit.
However, I am absolutely terrified of them.
Oh, that's the right answer.
Thank you.
How do I get into this bullshit career of yours?
Right. You make up languages.
First of all, you're highly educated, allegedly.
Fairly.
Like, did you really go to Berkeley?
Because I don't believe you, and I'll tell you why.
Sure.
Just because I feel like you're in a profession,
it's not like you're the governor.
They're not gonna really check.
Like they could just be anything
on your Wikipedia page.
And I'm taking it as gospel.
Yeah.
But you're saying you did go.
Yeah, I've got some photographs, but no,
like it's an interesting point you raised
about language specifically,
and it comes to not checking
because language is the type of thing
where it's different from anything else
that's going to be on a television show or a movie, right? If you're making a physical prop
for a movie or television show, what it needs to do is it needs to look real on screen. It doesn't
matter that the throne made out of swords on Game of Thrones wasn't actually made out of melted
down swords if it looks like it was. And in fact, it was 3D printed.
But it doesn't matter because it looks like swords on screen, and that's fine.
A language though, and this isn't just a created language.
I'm talking about any language.
Languages aren't real things.
Right, they're all eventually, or at some point, were just made up.
Yeah, and not only that, they don't exist anywhere.
Like, so if you think about English right now,
we're both speaking it, we both understand it,
but it's not as if it's somewhere.
You know, it's not as if English exists somewhere
and we can go check to see if what we said is really English.
You know, it's just English if basically you understand
what I'm saying and we both agree that we're speaking English
if other people agree and understand.
And so there's no way to check or verify that something is real.
Well, yeah, I always use my phone for a word and in Google,
like let's me know if I'm enunciating it properly.
Did it the other day with inclement weather?
Do you say inclement or?
Inclement, right?
You say inclement?
No, that's another plausible way of saying it wrong.
I'm thinking. I don't know.
I don't know.
Inclement?
It's inclement.
I don't know.
Inclement.
It's bizarre.
Anyway, it doesn't matter.
It's bizarre because the truth of it, it's not like any of them is actually right or wrong.
It's really just a percentage.
So, there is a percentage of people that say superfluous instead of superfluous.
Okay.
And that percentage is probably higher than people that say inclement versus inclement,
right?
But on the other hand, envelope, envelope saying either one is more likely to be considered
right by most people.
It's not like one of them is incorrect.
How does this get back to the fact that I don't think you went to Berkeley?
Good point.
Did anybody ever verify like your background? I'm just saying like that because you did you
know this is Hollywood nobody verified.
That's what I'm saying. It's so easy to bullshit.
Have you heard of dialect coaches?
Are there lies on your Wikipedia page or things that aren't true? There is on mine.. Okay. Let me let me think there. There certainly there certainly was at one point in time
I put my birth date on Wikipedia because I often for a wiki pedia
What do you say?
Wikipedia. Oh wow. Do you also say Pokemon? No, I don't ever say that because I'm a fucking adult
No, I'm definitely a wik. Am I supposed to say Wikipedia?
I say Wikipedia.
Oh, man.
Yes.
I always ask because I know, you know, I have a Florida public school education.
I know the hand that I was dealt.
My apologies.
Yeah.
And I know I say things wrong all the time, so I stop when somebody says something different like wait am I saying it wrong?
So I'm supposed to be saying wiki-pedia. I mean supposed to is a weird thing. I would say
More Americans probably say wicca pedia, I guess which just shows how mainstream it is
Well, let's get into the language stuff
So how many languages can you actually speak and I'm not talking bullshit ones?
I don't know like the ones that I feel good about just speaking little bits of tiny
bits, probably five, six, okay. I mean, that's impressive, but not like, oh my goodness.
No, it's not. All right. So when did you create your first
language? And by the way, some of your earlier languages, do you look back on and go, ooh.
Oh gosh, yeah, of course. But I created my first language my second, my second year
at Berkeley. I had been studying Arabic and Russian the first year. And I had to stop both of them
because the next Arabic course is going to be offered at nine in the morning, which is way too
early. And the next Russian course is going to be offered at eight in the morning, which is just
even earlier than too early. And so you were like were like, I don't want to learn Russian or Arabic because of the time of day that
it was taught.
Yes.
Instead, I'm going to focus on Klingon.
I started studying linguistics, which was really cool and really fascinating because
it's a scientific study of all languages.
And so you don't focus on learning any one language.
You learn the patterns behind them.
It was a lot of fun.
It really took to it very easily.
I did miss the language study though.
And so part of what I did was I started creating
my own language to kind of incorporate elements
of languages that I missed.
Arabic in particular, I loved the Arabic language.
Oh.
It's just a delightful one.
So scary.
Ah, not really.
Not really.
Grammatically, it works like nothing else I'd ever seen.
What jive?
Do you speak jive?
Shit, man.
That hunk came up and we messed him up already.
Got to be running cool upside down his head.
Not a language.
It's more of a, well, okay, hold on.
How dare you?
When we say not a language,
it's kind of like saying, like,
is American English a language?
The answer is yes, of course it is, but it's not a separate language from English.
Altul. You know what I'm saying? I don't know.
So it's like any type of a dialect, you know, is that a language? Like, of course it's a language.
It's an instantiation of a language, but that dialect is not going to be
a separate language from another dialect. That's why it's called a dialect.
Talking in tongues.
Yeah.
Steljogla hamalana le lo lendilek inkren in stelest karatak.
Are you jealous of them?
No, that's... I mean, it's just complete bullshit.
What?
Yeah, absolutely.
You kid me, though, that's a beautiful language.
Can you decipher someone that's talking in tongues?
Well, here's the thing.
You can actually tell if somebody is talking in tongues? Well, here's the thing you can actually
Tell if somebody is talking in tongues if they're if they're native languages of English if they're native languages French and so on and so forth
Because it's basically a gibberish, but gibberish itself has patterns to it
I was gonna speak a lot of gibberish to you during this interview
But I won't do you want to know why because all of my gibberish
Tends to start to head
Do you want to know why? Because all of my gibberish tends to start to head
very Asian for some reason.
And I don't want to do it.
I don't know why it does it, but when I speak gibberish,
all of a sudden it's like,
I'm surprised you haven't been canceled
because it does seem like every made up language
kind of teeters on a little racist.
No? No, I don't think so.
Now I will say this, the people that I create languages for often tend towards some sort
of racist, definitely.
I usually try to kind of rescue it by putting a language in there that is more or less realistic.
And the truth is that, I mean, languages themselves,
they don't have any characteristics that, you know,
that reflect anything about a race, a region of people.
I mean, there's the vocabulary items themselves, right?
But nothing about the pronunciation,
nothing about the grammar,
all of that is just kind of cultureless, really.
Did you know that this was what you were gonna do?
You met anyone that had done this before?
No, like many people I think before like 2009 really,
or many people who created languages
were they independently invented the idea.
Some had heard about Tolkien,
some had heard about Klingon. I hadn't happened to.
So like many others, I kind of independently invented the idea of creating my own language.
It was fun.
And then when I met others, I was like, oh, crap, now I don't have a corner on the market.
And are there tons of?
Thousands.
Are any of them successful?
In what regard?
Making a living.
Somebody giving you more than a dollar.
No, I don't think anybody else
has ever made a living doing this.
There's certainly other people
that have been paid to do it.
Yeah, and it's growing.
It's a growing field,
but I don't think anybody before me
actually made a living creating like this.
Can AI just take your job away from you?
Can AI do like just made up stuff?
AI can take anybody's job if the person employing them values the AI over a human being.
So it's like if you think about like writers in Hollywood, it's like, well, if the producer doesn't care,
absolutely AI can take a writer's job.
If they care even the slightest amount, they'll see what the AI is producing is jibberish.
Okay. Um, I stand with, with the producers as a rule, whoever's
writing the check, that's who I stand with.
But you know, they've been doing gibberish for created
languages ever since Hollywood has existed.
They're still doing it with Star Wars.
Uh, in the Star Wars universe, they love their gibberish.
Well, let me, let me talk some dollars.
Okay.
Cause I need to know this.
And I need you to answer it honestly, if you feel like it.
You don't have to do your own personal experience,
but a real big budget television show
hires you to create a language.
They can pay whatever.
What's the rate to come up with a language?
Never met.
I've never worked on a television show or movie that wasn't strapped for cash.
It was just like in negotiations with them, it would be like, oh gosh, and I tell you,
we just, the budget, it's just so constrained, we don't have a lot of money for right now.
Every single one was absolutely destitute.
And there's no union to protect you for-
Oh God, no.
Ha ha ha.
Okay, well give me a ballparker,
what I can think, you know,
what I could go in as an asking price.
Anywhere from like $400 to like $100,000.
And as for the whole project?
Yeah, and everything in between,
there's absolutely no consistency.
But 100,000, could that be a project
that only takes you a month to do?
Well, that's an interesting question.
So when it comes to creating a language,
I mean, theoretically, theoretically, right?
You could just do it instantly, right?
Because language only exists in your mind.
And so if you can come up with all of this stuff
and it coheres and you can remember it, right?
You can just create a language just by snapping your fingers.
The problem is, will you remember that seven months from now?
Yeah.
And so where the time comes in is recording
all of this stuff so that you can reproduce it and others can reproduce it and it remains
consistent.
I mean, do you put all the rules into it?
Absolutely. You gotta.
Do you come up with swear words?
Oh, that's usually what they ask for first.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Racist terms? Do you do that?
On defiance I did.
Defiance was a great project. Racist terms? Do you do that? On defiance I did.
Defiance was a great project. I created four different languages, four different writing systems.
It was a whole bunch of different aliens that existed on Earth,
because they basically all crash-landed there.
And so like everybody spoke each other's languages or little bits of it.
You know, there were there were swear terms
There absolutely were like racist terms for the other aliens from other aliens from humans. It was great
What about the N word? Did you ever have to come up with something for it?
I mean not that specifically, you know, okay? Yeah, well, I was just curious
Yeah, I got to put it on my list of do not ever say or rap right do you hate
Poo-dee-tang because you weren't involved in that movie
I'm drawing a complete blank you don't remember Poo-dee-tang sippy tie on the run a high
This was 90s right and no it was Louis C. K. Did it with Chris Rock?
They they produced it, but it was a he he spoke his own language and he had his belt
and he would whip bitches.
This is the, was this early 2000s in?
It might be 2001.
2001, Poo-Dee-Tang came out.
Oh my God, I was getting it confused
with Bo-Finger for a minute.
No, no, no, Poo-Dee-Tang was all about a made up language.
Wow.
You've never even watched it?
No.
David, you should definitely watch Poo-Dee-Tang.
I mean, just, just, I think comedically,ically because it was so it was like such a disaster like it did so bad and then it became
You know whenever they try to pretend that movies are you know good afterwards?
Valerian yep, which one's that
That was one of the languages from Game of Thrones. Can you speak all of these languages perfectly?
No.
I mean, I can pronounce them.
My name is Daniel.
Can you say that in Valerian?
Let's see.
Nuhabrosi Danielissa.
Oh, that sounds beautiful.
Oh, thanks.
Sounds like Italian.
Yeah.
I can do it like, you know, Orchishy too.
Nuhabrosi Danielissa.
There you go.
Oh, wow.
That's beautiful. That's neat too. because I made a duolingo for that one
Duolingo course. Well now let's forget my name is Daniel
Let's talk about the fact that we can download an app and we can put in your languages into them just hi valerian
Yeah, hi valerian. Yeah. Oh god. Hey, I didn't make that up George R. Martin did
By the way and that and that by the way is kind of BS Yeah. Oh God. Hey, I didn't make that up. George R. R. Martin did.
By the way, and that, by the way, is kind of BS. So there's this, German,
one of the dialects is called High German,
but it's not called High German
because it's fancy or precious or something.
It's because it was literally spoken at a higher elevation.
Oh God, I thought you were gonna just do a salute there.
That was literally what, it was, well, I know.
I didn't know what you're doing.
I was like, all right, okay, fine. I didn't know what you're doing.
I was like, all right, okay, fine.
You're gonna edit this terribly for me, aren't you?
No, I, again, you were fine.
It was where I went that was wrong.
How did you sell Jesse on this bullshit career views?
Yeah, I know.
So Jesse was, so she decided to start creating languages
on her own, like many people. Good grief.
There's two of you?
Oh, yes.
Under one roof?
There's so many, there's so many.
But she was a professor of linguistics for many years.
And actually it was pretty funny at the time, like when I first met her or knew about her,
I absolutely despised her.
She didn't know this.
Okay.
Yeah, because she was fine.
So she had contacted me.
I was involved with the Language Creation Society at the time.
I was the president of the Language Creation Society,
and we were trying to kind of build ourselves up to get jobs for other language creators
And it was very difficult because honestly we were fighting against the Hollywood just doing gibberish
They're like why should we pay you anything to do this when we can just write blah blah bleep blah and be done
Okay, so that's that's what Hollywood does if they don't want to pay someone like you to create a language
They just tell the actors to do gibberish. And it still happens.
And that still happens.
And sometimes they're good at it, sometimes they're not, or is it always poor?
Oh, it's always poor.
Star Wars is the worst.
Like, you don't have to be a linguist to figure it out.
It's just like you listen...
Star Wars uses gibberish?
Oh, yeah, all the time.
My dead body.
Oh, my God.
I'm so happy to have you.
But that's a longstanding tradition for Star Wars.
Okay.
But it's just the type of thing where it's like that person just said the same thing
twice and it meant something different and we know that because of the subtitles that
were given.
And so it's just like, I don't think a language can work like that.
Have you met George R.R. Martin?
Yeah.
When's that large old man gonna finish this next book?
So listen, George R.R. Martin, I really liked him
and he was really good to me.
But I think there came a point where he decided,
well, that's it, I'm not gonna talk to this guy anymore.
Oh, well, I just wanted to finish his next book
so I can not watch that.
He is done with me.
Are you a big reader?
Have you read the books?
No, am I a big reader? I mean, in that I like the words to be
written really big on a page. Yes. No, I'm not not a big
reader. And no, I've never read any of his books.
I, I, well, I mean, I had to read them for for the for the show
just so that I could say that I read them. I listened to them as
audio books.
That's not reading.
No, and it feels different and your memory, your recall of it is different, but it could
be done while I showered.
And so that I appreciated.
You can't read the shower.
You got to get one of those defogger tablets.
How come George has two R's in his name?
What is that all about?
George R.R.
That's a real asshole move, if you ask me.
It's pretty coincidental that both he and Tolkien have R.R. as middle names.
Total coincidence, apparently.
Huh.
But what about Dune?
Everyone says that's an amazing book.
Was the movie good?
Tash Arkadekoshidutat atredish chudapi
shtadun dan nath.
Oh yeah, no, the movie was really good.
Did you, I mean, did you ever see that Blade Runner 2049?
The, uh...
There's no way I did.
I've never seen The Godfather.
Oh, you know what, I saw The Godfather
and I could recommend that. It's a fun time.
No, I know. It's just not my thing. I just don't have three hours to watch this movie.
And if I do, it's like that's not what I'm going to do with that three hours.
Sure.
It's the hand I was dealt.
Yeah, no, I got you.
No, the first one I saw, the first one was great.
Second one, Jesse and I worked on it together
and it's gonna feature like a ton of my language.
Wait a second, wait, your language?
Not Jesse, don't you get any credit for it, Jerk?
Okay, so technically I created it, right?
Because Jesse didn't work with me on the first one,
but she worked with me all throughout the second one
and she probably knows knows it now
Better than any of our others. So now it's kind of her into the deal to get her onto the show
I will shoehorn Jesse and everything and they will thank me afterwards because that's how good she is
Well, that's what I say about my team, but I they're furious every time
Damn, we got to employ all these assholes
How long did it take Kurt Russell to learn eulish?
Bjorn Lanna, Vicky, Bracken Husion.
Oh man, so that's funny.
I was there for the voice recording for that movie,
Christmas Chronicles.
He did a pretty good job,
but it's like basically he just heard my audio recordings
and did them.
You know, most of the actors actors on most things I work on
Uh-huh the recordings are good enough. They hear the recordings. They do them. They're pretty good
So you realize that I mean you know this that acting is really it's just dumb like they just are repeating words
but how many times do you see
The Academy Awards
see the Academy Awards nominate some eight-year-old girl that had never acted a day in her life, and then she's up for the highest honor in the world.
And that can only happen in acting.
You can say her name, Annapak, when we all know.
Oh, I don't even know who's talking about it.
But you get the point that I'm making there.
I agree.
There's some great actors, and by some, I mean Christian Bale.
And then like everybody else is like, all right, we get it.
You looked the part, you know?
And if you didn't look the part,
well then put on a big nose and pretend.
I really appreciate, and I should say this more to them,
I really appreciate when the actors just do the work of listening to the recordings that I've appreciate, and I should say this more to them, I really appreciate when the actors just do the work
of listening to the recordings that I've done,
listen to the inflection that I've given it,
and do their best to make it sound believable and authentic.
Most of them do, some of them are absolutely excellent,
and then just the one or two that are just absolutely
terrible and clearly think that, you know,
my job is just the dumbest thing in
the world and they can't even believe they're being asked to do something so embarrassing.
That's the embarrassing part is doing the made up language versus sitting in makeup for three
hours and then playing dress up and then, you know, for 10 minutes saying one stupid
line 40 different times and then getting paid a shitload of money. Oh, yeah
So grueling. Yeah, but what actors were you referring to that are just horrible and obnoxious go and say their name
Man say their name right now
There there's one in particular. I think you know, I shouldn't I shouldn't say is okay
Well, I'll say it's a him. So we have a him. Okay. Now. Let's get a race
Let's get a race out of you
do a super fans of these shows and movies ever contact you and
Try to debunk or tell you that you were wrong or blah blah blah or find air and what language that you've created
Oh, sure. No, in fact, there was one of the most peculiar errors
that ever happened.
It was the last season of Game of Thrones
and there was a very short scene
in which Daenerys, one of the main characters,
asks one of the Dothraki warriors
who took care of the dragons.
Don't ruin it for me, I haven't seen it.
It is a minor thing.
Just ask them, just ask them,
taking care of one of the dragons.
How many today referring to how many
animals did the dragons eat?
And the answer was, you know,
in Dothraki something like,
I think it was like three sheep and a leopon goats.
Anyway, I get this tweet from somebody saying,
like, while the show is still airing, live,
he says that Dothraki didn't sound right.
Okay.
Right, and so I go back afterwards and he was correct.
The Dothraki was incorrect because the Dothraki
they asked for and that I gave them was three sheep
and 11 goats or something like that.
The subtitle, which they changed later,
said 12 sheep and 14 goats.
So they were like, they gave me this line,
say translate this to the Vrachis, three sheep
and 11 goats or whatever I translate for them,
I send it back.
At some point in time, in the production,
someone said, that's not enough sheep and goats.
That's a network person.
They're like, nobody's gonna believe this.
The fans are gonna be like, what?
That's way too few sheep and goats.
But they were like, but it's not important enough
for us to go back and ask for a retranslation.
Let's just change the subtitle.
It was that important to them how many sheeps and goats
there were, but not important enough
to actually get the Dothraki correct.
In fact, it may have even been in post-production after the line was already done.
Here's what I learned about Game of Thrones from just this that I never knew. There's dragons
in the show. I never knew that. I never knew there was, I didn't know there was dragons.
Maybe tell me that and maybe I'll get yeah interested game of Thrones was for dragons with Jurassic Park was for dinosaurs
Can I can I tell you about my favorite part of Jurassic Park? Mm-hmm? Okay, so this is at the beginning
I don't know how well you remember this movie
But they're at're digging up dinosaur bones
for whatever reason there is a group of people there.
And he's explaining to them like they are looking
at a raptor skeleton and he says, look at this, see?
This bone right here, it looks like a bird.
Then from the back, there's this little kid
who says, why should I be afraid of that?
It just looks like a big turkey.
So first of all, I wanna stop right here.
Okay, good.
Evidently, because Laura Dern and Alan Grant,
they share a look and they share a like,
here we go again, look.
As if this is a very common occurrence
that they on this archeological dig often give talks
to people
who just come by regular ass people,
often there are kids in there.
And often what the kids say, they're like,
come here thinking like dinosaurs,
I'm supposed to be afraid of these.
And so then what happens is that Alan Grant turns around
and starts to describe in detail using like a raptor,
you know, claw of what the raptor would do
if he found him.
He says that he would eat you, maybe slice your belly, and the point is you would still
be alive.
And at that point it's like, oh, okay, you did it.
You frightened the child, which of course was your point as an archaeologist.
This is what you were supposed to be doing.
Well he was a smart alec, And so you got to put him in his
place. I suppose so. I think that's where where they were
coming from on that one. But it was something that happens all
the time apparently by the logic of the scene. Well, listen,
don't you want to you want to talk unrealistic? Let's let's talk
about the crotty kid. I just I mean, because there's the fact
that he was in recita and these rich kids on the other side of the hill
and they interacted constantly and then they're on the beach
and riding bikes back from the beach to get to recita.
I mean, do you have any idea how long
of a fucking bike ride that would be?
You taking Topanga?
Jesus Christ, it'd be a four day pedal.
I never thought about that. I thought about many things about that movie, never that. Anyway.
It just seemed far.
Now see, David, you come on to my show and I appreciate very much, but then I was like,
oh, I have to give everybody a gift for coming on the show.
But that's really nice.
Well, it's not, save it.
So today I was like, what should I give you?
I got you. I got you. I got you. I got you. for coming on the show. Oh, that's really nice. Well, it's not, save it.
So today I was like, what should I give you? I got you, I got you a Nest Mini by Google,
because I think it's perfect for you,
because you can just, any time you're in your house,
just say, hey Google, how do you say,
and that'll help you out.
So I don't know who, why I own this, but now I don't.
By the way, I'm not sponsored by Google, but man
I would love it if if you would Google sponsor me and I'll fucking
Tell people your shit is worth keeping and not giving away
Thank you
That that is wonderful because I actually have a couple of these things and now I can just
couple of these things and now I can just tie it in. Oh, I've got it.
It looks a little sleeker than I thought, or be honest with you.
I mean, look, it hooks to Spotify and that's great.
Yeah.
You and your fiance have a YouTube channel where you make languages for animals or what
is this?
Yes, we do.
All right.
So I had this board game idea that I've been working on for years and I-
Do you like board games?
Love them.
So do I.
Absolutely. I mean, I like some of them. I don't think we'd, I don't I- Do you like board games? Love them. So do I. Absolutely.
I mean, I like some of them.
I don't think we, I don't know if we'd like the same ones.
Okay. Anyway, so it was just going to be
a series of anthropomorphic animals fighting each other.
And in order to do that, I was like,
well, the animals need to have names.
And in order for them to have names,
they need to have languages behind them.
And so I thought, well, wouldn't it be fun
if we just did this the long form way?
And what we do is for two hours every Thursday,
we sit down and we, I know, I know, we sit down and we start creating a language.
And we start from absolutely nothing and just go week by week,
build it up and pretty soon you see how it's done.
It sounds like a complicated game.
I'm not going to enjoy it.
Yeah.
I like simple games.
Like Sorry.
I mean, I don't have to, it doesn't have to be that simple, but I do enjoy sorry. Okay, although I find I find it a
Bit
tedious. I don't think we need four pawns. I think two would be plenty
To speed this shitty game up. I'm always reshuffling. Oh
I literally like try to like help my son win. But anyway, you know
what game I really hate that that ticket to tickets to ride, ticket to ride. You don't
like ticket to ride. You want to know what I hate about it? What do you hate? I hate
the board isn't very solid. It's kind of flimsy. And then the light plastic pieces barely stay where they
Anybody bumps the table at all and fucking my long run is shot. I
Hate the game. I'll be honest with that hate the game and I hate the game That's why I like what's the game that I like
With this very beautiful the heavy pieces. It's like the four. What do you call? What's it called?
It's like the four. What do you call it? What's it called?
Corto you ever play Corto? No, I haven't even heard of that. Corto is beautiful Okay, so beautiful board the pieces are beautiful and it's it's it's it's really good on the mind
You know anyway, whatever you're going to I like Corto
You play Monopoly deal. No. Oh, man
You gotta play monopoly now. That's not a really board game. It's a card game
Okay, but it's like Monopoly, but they found a way to condense it
to where it's like 10 to 15 minute games.
Oh.
And it's amazing.
Oh, is it amazing.
Rummy Cub?
Or do you say Rummy Cube?
Rummy Cube.
You say Rummy Cube.
Oh, you're the expert.
I'll say Rummy Cube for the rest of my life now.
Yeah.
It's not Rummy Cub, it's Rummy Cube.
No, I got, and for that one, I think that we actually,
I don't know if I heard somebody say it,
but they might say it in the rules.
I tell you how to do it. but they might say it in the rules.
There's a few things in the rules that are debatable. Okay. You know, it usually involves the Joker and like, because like you have to, or the Joker, what is it called a Joker?
Yeah, maybe it is, but you have to use that tile with two from your board, but can you end?
What if you just have one Joker left as your last tile? Can you play it anywhere?
I think you can. There's a few things that I don't understand. Right, right.
Opossums? I don't know I don't understand right right opossums
language for opossum you sure do
That was when I learned how you're insane. That was when I learned that
Possum was short for a possum. I thought that was that was the real word. Oh, there's two different ones
I had there's not well for first of all there are two different opossums
There's the Australian one and then the American one.
I thought there was one called possum
and one called opossum.
No, possum is apparently the shortening of opossum.
I thought opossum was the lengthening of possum.
I don't think it's opossum.
I thought it was opossum.
I don't think you, no.
Opossum, it's not opossum?
Yeah, I am, I'm stupid.
That's, I think that sounds to me
the way Wikipedia sounds to you.
By the way, is it Florida or Florida? I don't care
How do you say in Dorothy Rackie I'm beginning to believe that marrying you was a mistake
No, I don't need that yeah, I have no idea David. Thank you for being here. I appreciate it all the best. All right. Thank you so much
Talk to you soon. Yeah
Hi there, I'm Bob Pittman chairman and CEO of iHeart Media
I'm excited to announce a new season of my podcast Math and Magic stories from the frontiers of marketing our guests this season
Remind us to embrace change and fearlessly look toward the future. Like Andrew Jerecki, award-winning filmmaker and creator of Moviefone.
The studios didn't really control the theaters, the theaters didn't control the studios, and
I thought, well, there's a window in here where I could make things easier for the consumer
and also make something that would be very useful for the industry.
Or Kellan Kenney, chief marketing and growth officer
at AT&T, who installed fiber in customers' houses
rather than leading from afar.
It is so crucial that you spend time with the customers.
That is the best lesson.
In these exciting times, we're looking to the math,
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the creative spark more than ever.
Listen to a brand new season of math and magic on our very own iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast,
or wherever you get your podcast.
How could the most powerful man in media just vanish from public life?
My name is Chris Moody, host of the new podcast, Finding Matt Drudge.
I'm a reporter who's covered politics for years,
and in this podcast, I'm going to travel far and wide searching for the reclusive Matt Drudge,
the founder of the Drudge Report. Along the way, I'll talk to people who've worked with him,
dined with him and fought with him, taking listeners into private conversations,
all in an attempt to get a better understanding of who Drudge is and what motivates him.
I'll also be chasing down tips from you, the listener, through a special hotline, so
if you know where Drudge is right now or have a great Drudge story that might help us better
understand the mysterious media mogul, please give us a call at 301-2000-2414.
Hopefully by the time this show ends, the man who knows Drudge best, Matt Drudge himself,
will break his silence and sit down with us.
Listen to finding Matt Drudge on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your
podcasts.
Good song.
The Johnny Carson theme, right?
Hey, who wrote that?
Skip, who do you think it's your buddy?
Hi everyone, I'm Paul Anka.
And I'm Skip Bronson.
And what happens when two old friends take their decades of experience in the business
and entertainment roles and sit down with our buddies?
You get our way, a brand new show from My Heart Podcast where we chop it up with our
pals about everything under the sun.
Hear about Michael Buble's entrance into show business.
And get business insight from Mark Burnett.
Find out what scares my son-in-law, Jason Bateman.
And discover the bragging rights that come with beating Michael Jordan at golf.
Together, we know just about everybody, including sitting presidents.
So join us as we ask the questions they've not been asked before.
Tell it like it is and even sing a song or two.
This is our podcast and we're gonna do it our way.
Listen to Our Way on the iHeart Radio app,
Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast.
["Pause Show"]
Pause show. Well, thank you, David, for being on the show, or should I say,
Na-ka-tik-toy-tash-toy-toy-ka-toy-ay-toy.
Carl, did you enjoy that made up language?
David was talking about a guy.
A guy's a nerd.
I mean, in the nicest way possible,
but just a kind of a nerd, huh?
Anyway, a few updates for those of you that care.
I remember my car guy, Marty,
I asked him if he could find an E30,
green manual convertible, mission accomplished.
Had it for a few weeks now.
Carl and I love it.
Take drives up the PCH.
Carl keeps his head out the window and I'm just feverishly texting.
Just praying everything goes away.
Another update. Rock, the drag queen.
Oh, that was an episode that divided the nation.
Just want you to know that he did receive that big wooden muckaawk.
And he's enjoying that piece of furniture now.
I'm sure he is.
Okay, time for some plugs.
Boyswearpink.com.
My charitable clothing line for toddlers.
Check that out.
Don't forget to tune into the goat whenever the hell that show comes out.
What else do we have?
My tour dates coming up, looking forward to performing in NorCal.
And where else?
The Midwest, Kentucky, ooh, that'll be fun in Kentucky.
Ohio, Michigan, Vegas, that's not the Midwest.
That's West West.
Gonna be at the Cosmopolitan.
My first time there.
Not my first time, my first time performing there.
Okay, well, you might as well get ready to take a nap
because it's time for my son's bedtime story.
See you guys next week.
Once upon a time, there was a playground.
Anyone who liked the playground, it was so, so fun.
But one of them didn't like it.
The only one who liked it when they turned the lights on was so fun
but and then the police came the police started
and they were dumped out and and and and the police got bitter and bitter
and bitter until until they had a little home but it was so big.
What are they what got bigger? The park. The park? Yeah. The park got bigger and bigger?
Yeah. What does that mean? That means they were like flocking a stick and hitting all the
poles but they did not get bigger and bigger door how was the park getting bigger and bigger
right like I don't know tornadoes hit it maybe and that made it bigger and bigger
it was a whole area I didn't know why I didn't know sun is this a true story yes I know I know I know
that's scary
Yes, I know, I know, I know, I know.
That's scary.
Yeah. more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. On Corjain about creating a billion dollar startup.
Walter Isaacson about the geniuses who change the world.
Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart podcast on the iHeart Radio app,
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John Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show,
which means he's also back in host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in
our ears on The Daily Show, Ears Edition podcast.
Join late night legend John Stuart and the best news team for today's biggest
headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more.
Now this is the second term we can all get behind.
Listen to The Daily Show, Ears Edition on the iHeart Radio App, Apple Podcast, or wherever you
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A middle-aged electrician is murdered in a quiet Amsterdam suburb.
The killing leads investigators into a web of drugs, money laundering, and state-sponsored
assassinations that stretches from Dublin to Dubai.
At the center is a cocaine super cartel and a hidden economic war between democracies
and dictatorships. It's the new season of the hit podcast from the Financial Times and
Pushkin Industries, Hot Money, the New Narcos. Listen to Hot Money, the New Narcos on the
iHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.