Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 115 - Guitar Legend Danny Weis

Episode Date: October 16, 2017

Danny Weis has played next to Jimi Hendrix, Lou Reed, maybe Janis Joplin (he’s not sure, there were a lot of drugs going around in the 60’s), and many more DECENT musicians.  Today, the poor bastard has to sit next to Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles. Episode 115 is brought to you by the official Trailer Park Boys Store, SwearNet.com (the only place to watch the video of this podcash), Liquormen's Ol' Dirty Canadian Whisky, and the Boys' own Freedom 35 lager!

Welcome to the Trailer Park Boys podcast, brought to you in parkboysswearingit.com, the only place where you can see the video version of this podcast. Nice one. And go to trailerparkboysmerch.com and check out some merch. Buy some stuff, please. They sponsor us, too. What about the beer and the liquor? I was just getting to that, Richard. Also sponsored by Freedom 35, beer, drink the dream,

and Liquorman's old dirty Canadian whiskey. Drive her into your guts. You guys want to make a trade? Chips for popcorn? Nope. Why not? Because I've already tested the popcorn and we own the popcorn. But these are way too crunchy, man. You know I'm going to get in shit for eating these. This is one of the better popcorns you've ever had. Let's just get to it. Okay.

Can you get me a little bowl maybe? Is there a bowl or something? No, I am officially starting it. Boys, listen. Three, two, one. There's the sound. That signals the beginning. Is there a bowl or something? No, I am officially starting it. Boys, listen. Three, two, one. There's the sound. That signals the beginning of podcast.

Here it is, Bubba Lou. Very nice. What number are we on? 115. This is the official Trailer Park Boys podcast. It's coming at you right now, and it's 115. And what's the date? It's actually Friday the 13th. This is not a good day. It is a good day. It's a great day today. It's 1-15. And what's the date right now? It's actually Friday the 13th. This is not a good day.

It is a good day. It's not, it's not, it's a great day today. It's a great day. We have a special guest that I'm very excited about. Yes, we do. One of rock and roll's biggest legends. Already laughing. Legendary guitar player Danny Weiss is here.

Yes. Danny, what's up? Thank you, sir. How are you doing? I'm doing good. All right. Thanks for being here. You didn't want a beer, eh?

You just want... No, just water. That's strange. I could have used a beer. You would think. It's hard for us to relate to that, but that's all right. I used to. Did you?

You used to hit the liquor? Oh, yeah. On stage? Occasionally. Maybe more than occasionally. Yeah, all cranked up. Wicked. Long time ago.

So, just for the people that don't know, let's just do a little recap. You, born where? California. San Diego, right? San Diego County. Actually, El Cajon. El Cajon grew up in California.

And just so people are aware of who the fuck we're talking to here, Danny was in Iron Butterfly when you were how old? 17 and a half. I co-founded it, actually. Nice. Co-founded Iron Butterfly. That's crazy. 17. And you were in Rhinoceros, which was Paul Rothschild's super group.

Yeah, it was. Right? And co-wrote the hit. Apricot Brandy. Apricot Brandy. And he played with a few other people. Oh, nobody big, just Jimi Hendrix. Fuck's sakes.

That's crazy. Alice Cooper, Lou Reed, Everly Brothers, Burton Cummings, the Rascals, Melissa Manchester, Bette Midler, no big deal. Yeah, you were in The Rose. Yeah, I was the musical director for the band in The Rose, 1978, came out in 79. Man. Decent. Another long time ago. Can't even wrap my head around any of that stuff.

I can't even wrap my head around the fact that you just said that to him. You didn't screw it up. You were right. Who, me? Him, Ricky. You know a bit of information there. What's the name of that site where you type stuff in and you can learn about anything?

And with one sentence, he eradicates everything else he said. Totally. What is it? What's the name of the site? Google. No. Wikipedia. Say it again. Wikipedia. See? What's the name of the site? Google. No? Wikipedia. Say it again.

Wikipedia. See? You're stupid. Why? You're dumb. Why? It's Wikipedia. And everyone calls it Wikipedia.

It drives me fucking nuts. Why is that? It's Wikipedia. Who cares? I call it Wikipedia. Everyone calls it Wikipedia. Danny calls it Wikipedia as well. Just like Tiki. Do you say Tika?

So it's Wiki-pedia. Not Wiki. What is it then? What does he say? Wiki. Wiki. Wikipedia. Wikipedia.

Who gives a fuck? There's the big question. Who gives a fuck? I want to ask Danny some questions about some of this. So I'm going to hit you with best story you can think of from each of these. Best Jimi Hendrix story. Well, I was playing with rhinoceros

and we played a club in New York City called The Scene. It was after hours club. It was downstairs and it was like from one to five in the morning and we're on stage and lo and behold, Jimi Hendrix shows up and asked to 5 in the morning. And we're on stage, and lo and behold, Jimi Hendrix shows up and asks to sit in with us and play bass. So obviously he did, and I'll never forget it. It was a wonderful experience. Decent. What year are we talking?

Probably been around 70, 71. Really? Wasn't there a rumor that he wanted to play bass because he was too intimidated by how good you were on the guitar? I've heard that, but I sincerely doubt that. But he came in and sat down and you guys jammed. Yeah. All fucked up at a club in New York City.

That is, wow. It was a great club. After hours, all the musicians went there. That's amazing. That's amazing. That's amazing. All right amazing. That's amazing. All right, Lou Reed. I mean, you probably have a million Lou Reed stories,

but any, like, jump out? Oh, bless his heart. Well, when we did the Sally Kent dance album, we were rehearsing, and Prakash was there as well, and we decided to mess with one of his songs and play it R&B funk style, and like Lou does, it's total heavy metal rock. We did it in a funk way, and Lou looks at it and he says, whoa, what was that? What was that?

Well, it's R&B. We thought he would hate it, and he said, oh, let's do all the songs that way. And so we did the whole Sally Can't Dance album that way, and the whole tour of Europe and Australia and everything was funk rock. Wow. It was great. And because you guys were just fucking with them and then it turned into that. Yeah, it was a joke. But we liked it because we love R&B. Is that from the clip I saw where you guys were playing in France, Paris, somewhere?

It was the same tour, exactly. That's the Sally Can't Dance tour. Decent. You should roll a little piece of that Oh, just this, you can't do it anymore If you don't sing more players Then James, I'm not your, not your Who did my players That was fucking amazing. That was cool.

It's a good clip. It's a great clip. It's probably the intro to Sweet Jane. And Prakash made up the lick that goes into it. Exactly, that was his line. And so you guys were just jammed out waiting for Lou to come on stage? Yeah, and one night, actually, he didn't come out in time

because he was doing something. And we were probably playing that one song for about 10 minutes. I remember I wondered what was going on after a while. And I looked off stage to the roadies. And the roadies come up to me and they said, hey man, Lou's too fucked up to get on stage. I said, oh no, what do we do?

They said, keep playing. 10 minutes we played that intro. And what was Lou doing? Oh, I don't know. Drugs. Something. Probably. Or he had some ladies, either one.

Maybe so, but he straightened himself out over the years and got really healthy and he did well. He did awesome. What was he like, you know, just to hang out with? Pretty eccentric. Well, I think that goes without saying. Yeah, well, he would do strange things. Did you ever get to go to Andy Warhol's place with him?

No. No? That would have been decent. Yeah, that would have been decent, yeah. Did you ever get to meet the Hef? No. He just passed away. Yeah, he just did last week.

Who did? The Hef? Yeah. Hugh Hefner? Yeah, man. Oh, I didn't know that. I would have worn my nice velvet smoking jacket. Got it.

Wore my silk pajamas. He had a horrible life, didn't he? Yeah, I mean, he's 91. That was a great life. He didn't have a horrible life, Ricky. What are you talking about? He was being, you know, whatever they call that when you're not being serious. Oh, I was gonna say, he had a wicked life.

Did you ever get to go to the mansion? No. No? I don't want to go there. Well, I would have went there if I was you. I would have walked up and said, hey, excuse me, you know who the fuck I am? I'm coming in. Where's the ladies at? I would have gone if I'd been invited, I would have walked up and said, Hey, excuse me. You know who the fuck I am? I'm coming in. Where's the ladies at?

I would have gone if I'd been invited, I'm sure. In the past years. Where's the ladies at? Yeah, you probably didn't have a problem with the ladies. Ricky. What? That remains unsaid. Fair enough.

Alice Cooper. You got any stories? Did you ever get bit by a snake or anything crazy like that? No, Alice was very cool, very, you know, different than you would expect him to be because he plays the wild guy on stage. Yeah, I heard he's like a golfer. He plays golf, you know, just an everyday guy.

So he's not going around with the makeup on, biting bats and things like that. No, no, a very pleasant man, actually. See that, Ricky? You always used to say that Alice Cooper was, you know, possibly the devil, you used to say. Yeah, him and Ozzy. I thought they were both devils. No, no, they're both just regular guys. He's actually a good golfer, Alice Cooper, eh?

So is the devil. The devil's a good golfer. How do you know that the devil was a good golfer? I've seen him. Highlights. You've seen him on highlights? On where, Ricky? I'm calling you out on your bullshit right now.

You know what? I just remember. It was in a book or a thing. I forget. You saw highlights of the devil golfing in a book. He was on a tour for something. Ricky, you're so full of shit. So full of shit.

Oh, what about Burton Cummings? We met Burton Cummings one time. Me and Ricky did. Yeah, he's a lunatic. He's pretty awesome. Well, in a good way, yeah. He was swearing at us, and he was on the lacquer. What did you do with Burton?

Nothing stands out, really, except I had a good time with Burton. That was 1975, 76, right around there. Right when he was all cranked up. He was doing really well then, actually. Yes, sir. Good shape. That was always one of my favorite songs. You know, because, I don't know, the reason in particular.

A long time ago, 70s. I did a lot of different things in the 70s. A lot of touring in the 70s. Yeah? Yeah. What about the Everly Brothers? That was an album I did called Stories We Can Tell or Can't Tell, I think. And that was done at Elektra Studios with some of the musicians from Rhinoceros, actually. Decent.

Decent. That would have been late 60s. Really? See, I didn't get to do any of this stuff. No, you got ripped off. I wanted to hang out with the Everly brothers and fucking Burton Cummings and Lou Reed and Demi Hendrix. Yeah, you wouldn't have been good enough. Well, I could have hung out at least.

Yeah, if they let you. They'd let me. Ricky, what'd I say about eating? I forgot. Bubs, can you put some popcorn on that, please? Aw, Julian, you. They let me. Ricky, what'd I say about eating? I forgot. Buffs, can you put some popcorn on that, please? Julian, you're just going to eat old. Not very much. Don't give him very much.

Old paper popcorn, all right? All right, thanks, bud. That's better. But I don't want you eating. It's good. So do you have anybody you look up to or any influences? Oh, so many players. Actually, when I started playing, I didn't listen to guitar players very much.

I listened to sax players like King Curtis and Junior Walker for phrasing for my leads. I listened to Billy Preston for rhythmic styles. I listened to drummers for rhythm. My father was a professional guitar player and he was excellent. And so I learned some things from him too. Not a lot though, because he said, I don't want you to sound like me, I want you to develop your own style.

And I think that was a good idea and I did. That's pretty good. Right on. Decent. Smiling Johnny Reese, that was your dad? With a W, Weiss. Weiss, yeah. That was him.

That's what they call him because in almost every picture you see of him, he's smiling. He did that in stage two. I don't know why, but he's always him. That's what they call him because in almost every picture you see of him, he's smiling. He did that in stage two. I don't know why, but he's always smiling. Happy fella. Yeah. Nothing wrong with that.

Happy fella. It's better than Ricky who has a scowl on most of the time. It usually takes a buzz on for me to smile. Me too. Oh yeah, and I got a quote here from Bruce Springsteen's book. Did you guys see this? Yeah, that's cool.

Yeah, man. Oh yeah, this was, well, this is Bruce Springsteen's book. Did you guys see this? Yeah, that's cool. Yeah. Oh, yeah, this was, well, this is Bruce Springsteen talking. He says, Janice had in her band one of my great guitar heroes, Danny Weiss from Rhinoceros, whom Steve,

he's talking about Steve Van Zandt. Steve Van Zandt, yeah. Van Zandt, Ricky, not Van Damme. You're thinking of Jean-Claude Van Damme. He's not a guitar player. Steven Seagal is, a shitty one, but not Van Damme. Steve and I followed slavishly whenever they came into the Jersey area, received all these hands like a...

I can't read this. Rackling upon my trembling forehead and fell stunned by their power. He's talking about you. Mm-hmm. I just found that out. So Janis had her in her band? Yeah, is he talking about Janis Joplin? To be honest, I don't recall playing with Janis Joplin,

except I played beside her on the same show, but I see a lot of that printed, so I wouldn't say I did if I didn't, so... Danny, how heavy into drugs were you back in the 60s? Say what? How heavy into drugs were you? Because if you may be playing Janis' band, but I don't, so... Danny, how heavy into drugs were you back in the 60s? Say what? How heavy into drugs were you? Because if you maybe played in Janice's band, but I don't quite remember. I think you were...

Enough to know that I eventually needed to quit. Well, that's good that you did, but... So there's a possibility you played for Janice Joplin, but I'm not quite sure. I suppose so. It could have been Bruce and Stevie Van Dam on the drugs, too, and it hallucinated the whole thing. That's true. Maybe Bruce and Stevie Van Dam were doing acid or something.

Nobody knows. But that would be, I think we're going to have to research to find out if you played with Janice and don't remember. That would be fucked. Well, there was a lot going on in the 70s and the 60s. Yeah, that's why I'm glad. A lot of substance going around. I would have liked to have lived back then, but I'm glad I don't.

Because if Ricky lived back then... He'd be dead. He'd be dead. Yeah, if you lived back then, you'd be my age. Yeah. That, you know, would have got to hang out with all those... It would have been worth it. Ricky, you'd be dead for sure. At least brain dead.

Because they used to eat acid like candy back then. No. Those were the days. Yeah, he went through a phase. And his brain's not all thereabouts. It's no offense, man. Good percentage of it is. Hey, what about guitars?

I'm a big guitar fan, as you might know or may not know. Do you have any cool guitars? What was the best guitar you've ever had? I don't think I could say best because I like a lot of them, but I think Tom Anderson Guitar Works is one of the best companies in the

world. Really? I have a custom guitar made by a gentleman named Butch Boswell from California. He was my luthier, and he makes guitars from scratch, and he's phenomenal. Actually, I'm using one of those here. Decent. And I love Fender Telecasters. I'm a sucker for tellies. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Did you ever own any cool old ones back in the day? I had a 48 Broadcaster, and I had a 51 Telecaster, both stolen. What? Yeah. That sucks. Yeah, we did a gig with a 48 broadcaster. We did a gig at- A 1948 Fender Broadcaster.

It was amazing. Which today would be worth in the realm of- Might have been 49, but yeah, around there. But it would be worth what in today's market? 30 grand maybe. At least 30 grand for that guitar, boss. Nice. Which is good it's not here because it would get stolen today.

It was horrible. We played a gig at the Fillmore East, and the roadie, who was not too bright, took a load of equipment onto the stage and left the back of the truck open and the guitars were right there, came back. What an idiot! They were both stolen at the same time? Yeah, mine and Doug Hastings, the other guitar player. Both of them gone. Do you remember the roadie's name by chance? No, but he didn't last very long after that. Well if you're watching this, you stupid bastard, you fucked up.

Yeah, you did. You really fucked up good that day, bud. We've had the privilege of getting to listen to you and recording some music at the studio. Thank you. It's been really awesome. What color is the most expensive guitar you have with you here? What color is the guitar?

Yeah. Don't even tell him, Danny. I know what he's doing. Where's he going with it? Just... It's a simple question. It's not gonna go missing. Stay away from this guitar. What color is it? It's a simple question, Pops. Red.

It's a red one. And are you attached to it? Not all red. Yeah, that's the first Anderson that I ever owned. That's a 99. Hmm. All right. Danny.

Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. Danny. And are you attached to it? Not all red. Yeah, that's the first Anderson that I ever own. That's a 99. Hmm. All right. Danny.

And it's Koa wood. So it's not all red. You're really selling them on this guitar. I don't know if you want to... Yeah, I hope they like this. It's really weird that it's Friday the 13th and a lot of weird things happen on a day like that. Things do go missing.

So subtle, Ricky. You're so subtle. Do you know what they call... Do you know what this word says? Where? Triskaidekaphobia? Is that it? Triskaidekaphobia.

Triskaidekaphobia. Fear the number 13. A lot of people have it, I guess. I learned a word today. Okay, can you say it again with me covering it? Wikipedia. Can you say it again with me covering it? Taste-ka-lo-re-ka-phobia.

Yeah, you learned a word. But you know what? The kids got ripped off this year. They should have switched Halloween to this day. How many times can you get Friday the 13th in October? You just can't learn the word. But you know what? The kids got ripped off this year. They should have switched Halloween to this day. How many times can you get Friday the 13th in October? You just can't switch the day. If I was a kid, I'd be pissed. Why? Because it just makes sense. Friday the 13th, it's closed town.

I don't know. Don't you think that's cool? I think that's fucked, Ricky. That's what I think. Just the chances of it. What is he talking about? I don't know what he's talking about. Then it lined up. You just can't, like, move it wherever you want to, man.

But Friday the 13th is never going to be on Halloween, Ricky, because it's October 31st. We should make a thing that gets it changed. It's a scarier day. I'd be way more scared trick-or-treating on Friday the 13th of October. That's because of a movie, Ricky, from the 80s. It's real, though. It was a documentary. There's a documentary, is there, about Friday the 13th?

This guy with the hockey mask in that documentary? Hey, Bubs, all kinds of crazy shit happens on Friday the 13th, man. All kinds of crazy shit happens every fucking day, Mike. You know what planet we live on? Every Friday the 13th, the economy loses 900 million fucking dollars because people are afraid to go to work. And they're afraid to travel on this day. So, 900 million every Friday the 13th.

So suck on that. Well, that just shows you how fucked people are. Well, it's still happening. I don't give a fuck about Friday the 13th. I challenge the ghouls to come get me right now. Big mistake, bud. Yep. Better sleep with one eye open tonight.

You're fucked, Ricky. You know that movie where the people crashed up in the end on the mountain in the Andes? Yeah, it's called Crash, I believe. That happened on Friday the 13th. No, it's called Alive. Alive what? Alive whatever. It happened on a Friday the 13th. No, it's called alive. It happened what? It happened on a Friday the 13th.

Didn't Santa... Wow! Santa Jesus God died on Friday the 13th, didn't he? No, he didn't, Ricky. I think he did. I think he may have died on Friday the 13th. Santa Jesus God died on Friday the 13th. I think he might have.

How'd he die? Jason Voorhees cut him up with a machete, did he? I'm pretty sure it was a Friday. Did Jason Voorhees get him with his machete? Come here, Santa. I think he got shot, didn't he? Ricky... Santa never got shot. Whatever it was, he died.

I think it was a Friday. You were probably... Ricky... You won't open an umbrella inside either. I think it was a Friday. You were probably wrecking... You won't open an umbrella inside either. Which is fact. So prestitious is fact. Are you so prestitious? No.

Not at all? No. See? My grandma was. Don't walk underneath the ladders and all that shit. No, she's afraid of black cats. Don't let them cross your path. Ooh, don't shit. Yeah, she's afraid of black cats. Don't let them cross your path. Yeah, fuck that.

That's fucked. Hate to say it. You believe in all that shit, don't you, Ricky? I, yeah, some of it. You go to a hockey tournament, you don't change your underwear. What, the tournament's two weeks long, Ricky. Doesn't matter. Super suspicious. So you're gonna wear the same underwear.

Until you win the tournament. On the ice and off the ice. Until you're out of tournament or win. He doesn't change his underwear that often anyway. I don't usually wear underwear. Yeah. Too much info. Yeah.

Speaking of. Time is a lot of info, isn't it? Yes, sir. Pretty much. We have a guest here and you're telling them about your underwear usage. Well, all right. What else do we got, boys? I was just looking at who got born today.

There's a lot of people. Last week was lame. Paul Simon, you know him? Paul Simon was born today? Yep. What year? 1941. Hm.

You never got to play with him, did you? No. Did you ever meet him? No. Did you think he was attractive? That was for you both. Paul Simon? I found Art Garfunkel to be more more attractive. Rob Schneider? He got born today. Who's that? Rob Schneider, Son of Life. Oh, Rob Schneider. Sacha Baron Cohen. Oh, he's decent. Ali G. Do you know any of these people? Not yet.

Ashanti. Tiffany Trump. Tiffany Trump? Who the fuck is Tiffany Trump? Donald Trump's daughter. I didn't know. I thought it was... I thought he only had the one.

The 2324. The Ivanka one. See, this is stupid. It says that in 2324, this person's gonna be born. Beverly Crusher? She's a fictional doctor on Star Trek The Next Generation, Ricky. So why do we give a fuck about that? We don't.

Well, it's just a little tidbit. A little tiddy-bitty. Well about that? We don't. Well, it's just a little tidbit. A little tiddy bitty. Well, that was great, Rick. All right, guys. I got nothing... Ooh, events. Just wait. 1963, Beatlemania is coined. Who cares? As the Beatles appeared at Palladium, the term Beatlemania was coined today, boys. Did you ever meet the Beatles?

No. Never did? No, but my wife did. Did she? Yeah, she used to be a TV celebrity in Canada on a show called Razzle Dazzle. And she hosted the Beatles when they first came to Toronto. I got pictures of her with the Beatles. It's pretty cool. Did she get to interview him in chat? Yeah.

My God. Right on. That's pretty decent. I wish I could interview the Beatles. When did you start playing guitar? How young were you? Twelve. That's pretty decent. I wish I could interview the Beatles. When did you start playing guitar? How young were you? Twelve. That was your first instrument? No, my first instrument was...

Accordion. Accordion. I started at five years old. Wow. And I played with my dad and my mom in churches for four years. The accordion's one of the most difficult instruments to play. Yeah. So you know your hand over here with all the tiny buttons.

Yeah, and you've got to squeeze it. What are all those little fuckers? The bass chords. Each button is a chord. Oh, okay. So you're not over there going... No, but there's a lot of activity on it. There is.

There's a lot of jokes about it. Weird Al's are pretty good. Weird Al Yankovic's pretty good with the old accordion. And from age 9 to 12, I didn't know what I wanted to play. I took drum lessons, I listened to different things, and finally took guitar at 12. Decent. You didn't start until you were 26.

You, maybe that's why you're not as good. Bullshit, I started when I was five, Ricky. But I didn't have a guitar. That was the problem. It's not easy to practice a guitar when you don't have a guitar. No. Especially on a stick. I had to build one out of a broom pole and a cigar box. I started a jug band when I was younger. You guys remember my jug band? I don't remember the jug band when I was younger. You guys remember my jug band?

I don't remember the jug band. I never had a fucking jug band, I'm just teasing you. Your mother had jugs, though. What? What you say? Nothing. That's a ton about your mother's jugs. Um, I don't know what all this stuff is.

1975 rock vocal Neil Young undergoes cocksur...throat surgery. I thought that said cock surgery. Jesus, Murphy, that would have been quite a headline to have in the paper. Maybe he was jealous about somebody. 19...oh, these are kind of just dumb things here. Well, Bob Dylan, he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize to this day. Well, that was two years ago. Yeah.

Yeah. It was. Yes. Wow. Bob did get the, and I saw him play right after that. What did you just give me here, Ricky? Just some kind of horse shit. I don't know what it is. There's a bunch of things there.

Oh, Julian must have... Julian, did you download this one? 76-year-old hunk wins Brazilian beauty pageant. No, I didn't download that one. I told you to download all the best news stories you could find, and there it is, 76-year-old hunk. 76-year-old hunk, huh? Is it a guy or a girl?

Well, it's a hunk, Ricky. What does that mean? That means it's a dude. Is that him? That's him. Really? He's a hunk. Would he be considered a hunk?

I don't know, man. I've got to get a better look at him. Depends on what you... He's got to lose. Would he be considered a hunk? I don't know, man. I gotta get a better look at him. Depends on what you're a hunk of what, really. He's gotta lose the hat and the fucking bow tie, maybe. Depends on what you're calling him a hunk of, I guess. What's he a hunk of? He's a hunk of hunk of burning love. He's not a great pitcher.

All right. What else you got besides hunky? Hunky men, yeah, bubs. I didn't download it, you did. Suspected lung tumor turns out to be a Playmobil traffic cone. Yeah, I saw that. What? I thought it was a lung tumor. You have to wonder, was he snorting traffic cones,

or how did it get in his lung? That's a good question. It was a... Yeah, they took an x-ray of him, they thought he had a tumor, they opened him up and they pulled a little plastic traffic cone out of him. Buck, he must have been some relieved. Hmm. Why?

That it wasn't a tumor. Oh. This kid was probably... I thought you meant because he was missing his traffic cone. and some relieved. Why? That it wasn't a tumor. Oh. This kid was probably happy. I thought you meant because he was missing his traffic cone. Well, the kid was probably happy to get it back. See what I gotta deal with every day, Danny? Imagine dealing with that guy every day.

Well, if I snorted a traffic cone and went my lung and Mo would probably be upset. He'd want it back. He'd be worth more money, too, because it was in a lung. Listen to this one, Ricky. Norway vows to catch the jerk who chopped off its penis rock. Its penis rock? What's a penis rock? Let me just delve into this a little deeper.

I thought you said we weren't allowed to talk about penises. Not as far as news stories go, we're allowed to. Okay. I just didn't want you... Addressing the... Or an ostrich in the room. Say what? Did you ask me something?

I was, like, gone completely for a moment. No, it's just... It was these things Bob was wondering about. He just said that certain things we're not supposed to talk about. Ricky, what the fuck are you talking about? I'm just eating popcorn. Did you find anything else exciting or is it all lame? What's going on with Penis Rock? I want to know what this is here.

Norway catch the vandals who hacked off a rock formation that resembled an erect penis. The fallen troll Peckin, loosely the Troll Dick, was a popular destination in Egersund for hikers and climbers. So they had a big cock-shaped rock and some vandals chopped the end off it. And now Norway itself is livid. Norway, oh they've got lots of statues and shit. Cox and everything.

So it's penisless rock. Apparently. Huh. Wow, that's exciting. Yeah, that was a great story. Well, okay. Do you want me to fire all these away? I will. I mean, I've got stories here. There's this funeral crasher, this little lady, right? For 14 years, she's been going to people's funerals.

She doesn't know who they are, just to get the food. Wow, that's really something. We've been doing that for years, I know. That's what I'm saying. Remember, Ray used to take us out every Sunday. We'd have a funeral to go to to eat at. Your dad was greasy. Yeah, but I always thought that was greasy. Sorry, I just don't know. I didn't hear one word you said all day. Your dad used to take us to funerals.

Bark, beef, bow, riff. The what? I wasn't really listening to you. I was just hearing like bark, beef, bow, riff. What the fuck are you talking about? I zoned out. Don't know what you're talking about. Are you having a stroke, Ricky?

I could be. Bark, beef, bow, what? What the fuck? A rabbit set a world record for dunking basketballs. Now that's a story. It's a great story, boss. That's a fucking story right there. A rabbit set a world record for dunking basketballs. Now that's a story. It's a great story. That's a fucking story right there.

Well, Danny, I apologize for this. No, I apologize. Here we are sitting where the legend in Bowles is just embarrassing us with dumb stories. Well, I asked him all the important stuff. You didn't fucking... What did you do? I'm pretty sure I asked some questions. What about you, Julian? I wasn't fucking talking about stories about chipped fucking penis rocks and stuff.

That's embarrassing. No, you were just passing around pamphlets of 76-year-old hunks. No, you're the one that downloaded that. I don't do that downloading stuff. I don't download hunk pictures. You did this time. So where are you living now? In Ontario, up north. Okay.

Are you still playing a lot? Every day. And do you play with the Lincolns? Yeah, in the, let's see, 80 through 83. Nice. Great band. Love the Lincolns. Yeah.

That's where I was a few months ago. I was just trying to think of more questions, but my brain's not working the way it's supposed to. Well, I mean, we should have got you to bring a fucking guitar. That wasn't very smart. Great going, bubs. You could have went, you know,

showed us some rants or something. I got a lot planned to do today just as well. I've got to rest for a minute. Give the man a rest, Bubz. Jesus. Okay. Put him back off. If I did the sounds of it, maybe you could air guitar.

Bubz, that's getting stupid. I don't do that. No. That's embarrassing. Probably wouldn't be that great. No. Wouldn't be really. Well it would look great but come on. Not gonna get him to do the air guitar.

Well let's go get drunk then. Let's go get drunk. I want to see him play and go watch Danny. Okay guys. We're gonna go watch you play. It's some magic. People don't get to see it, but too bad. We'll always wonder. Thanks for coming on, Danny. Thanks, guys. Thanks for being here. Cheers. Thank you. Oh, those are a little greasy.

This one's good. Thank you. Popcorn grease. Don't wash your hands. Thank you.