Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 140 - Good Dope, Good Times

Episode Date: April 23, 2018

Ricky is WASTED on this fine 420 Day! The Boys try to remember all the crazy stuff that happened on tour, and work out how many burgers Randy has driven into his gut. They also discuss Star Trek, the Red Baron, and why Ricky ended up in Mexico. PLUS: Bubbles sings the Monty Python Lumberjack Song! Episode 140 is brought to you by the official Trailer Park Boys Store, SwearNet.com (the only place to watch the video of this podcash), Liquormen's Ol' Dirty Canadian Whisky, and the Boys' own Freedom 35 lager!

Welcome to the Trailer Perk Boys podcast, brought to you in perkboysswearingit.com, the only place where you can see the video version of this podcast. Nice one. And go to trailerperkboysmerch.com and check out some merch, buy some stuff, please. They sponsor us too. What about the beer and the liquor? I was just getting to that, Richard. Also sponsored by Freedom 35, Drink the Dream, and Liquorman's all-dirty Canadian whiskey.

And a new beer is born. Try my new Ricky's Catch-23 malt liquor. It's stronger than you are. So, what's his deal? Is he going to fucking be asleep for the entire podcast? Well, this is why I didn't want to do the fucking podcast right now, because he's fucked. He's always fucked, though.

All right, everybody, we just finished tour, and we're a little beat up, especially this crazy bastard. Yeah. I don't know if you guys't even possibly imagine what it's like being with him on a bus for two weeks. And this stinky, stinky, horrible fucking man. Randy, what fuck do you smell like? I can't even. Just different burgers that I've been eating down here. But it turns into a combination. Like you smell like the sewer. Why do you smell like the sewer? There's no soap

that'll clean you, man. It's just in your skin or something. Two weeks. Have you had a shower in two weeks? Yeah, I have. I usually do

every other day. Well, I don't know why you smell like you do. I wish there was smell-o-vision on this because people would not watch it. All right, I guess

we should just start it. Just start it. We'll start it and then work on waking him up. What's going on, fuckers? This is the official Triller Prep Boys podcast coming at you. This is episode 140, and we're fucked.

140? What's the date? 20th? April 20th. Yes, we are. Hey, it's 420. Oh, here we go. That woke him up.

That got his attention. Here we go. Thanks for piping up there, Rick. Ricky, can you wake up for a couple seconds? Yeah. I forgot it's 420, boys. We gotta get up. Well, we're already up. We've been up all fucking day, man.

We gotta get it going. We gotta get it going, do we? We've been getting her going. I'm still fucked. You need a joint or what? I tore her fuck me, boys. Well, you didn't sleep for two weeks straight, man. You got to get something.

It's a pretty crazy one. We got to see a lot of places, huh? Yeah, do you remember any of them? Give me the highlights. Well, let's go through where we were. Let's see if you can guess. We started in Canada. No, him. Let's ask him.

Where did we start, Ricky? Western Canada. Okay remember. Where did we start, Ricky? Western Canada. Okay, what city? Uh, begins with an E. E-las-ka. Hmm. Oh, fuck. Nope, we didn't go there.

E-las-ka's not in Western Canada. No. Edmonton? Edmonton, yes. Remember being there? Got it. Okay, then where did we go to? Then where did we go?

Then we went to another place. Okay, yeah. Near there. Dooling Gap. Dooling Gap. Yeah. Dooling Gap. Dooling Gap. Dooling Gap. Edmonton? Edmonton, yes. Remember being there? Got it. Okay, then where did we go to? Then where did we go? Then we went to another place. Okay, yeah.

Near there. Doing good. Yeah, it starts with a C. Calgary. Yes, sir. Nice. Nice. Then we got on an airplane and we went somewhere not too far.

We went to a... Starts with a V. Lots of weed there. Tons of weed. You had a great time. Was that the helicopter, Doug? Yes, that was the helicopter, Doug. Yes, you pissed yourself. Remember? You pissed yourself in the helicopter.

Oh, what was the name of that grand, uh... Grand what? That doesn't start with a V, Ricky. No. It's a V, man. But the helicopter wasn't a V. No. I don't even remember where we man. The helicopter wasn't a V. No. I don't even remember where we went,

but it was close to Vancouver, and we went in a helicopter. Vancouver. It was Vancouver, yes. Yes, but what was the city we went to? Grand. In a helicopter.

Maple Ridge. Maple Ridge. Maple Ridge. That was weird. I just heard, like, the wind said it or something. And there was a lot of people there. It Ridge. Maple Ridge. I just heard the wind said it or something. And there was a lot of people there. It was a shit show. It was fucking crazy.

And then we made our way down the west coast of America. Somehow got across the border. I hid in the bay of the bus. Yeah, it worked out. Thank fuck. Thank fuck they didn't have a life scanner on the thing. Because Ricky was down in a... He was in a big road case. And then we went...

Starts with an S. Rains a lot. St. Seahawks. Oh yeah, Seattle. Yeah, there you go. And then... Then it got fuzzy. It got real fuzzy.

It got fuzzy around that point. It got fuzzy for me, too. When was the legal dope place? That was in Seattle, man, wasn't it? Seattle? Seattle, yeah. Oregon. Portland.

Orligan. Orligan, yes. But in Seattle, that guy gave you so much dope. Man, people were so fucking nice to me. Thank you for all the free... Where would I look? Hey, thank you for all the free dope and everything great that was given to us.

Good people, good times. I got to try cheeseburgers from every place. They were freaking good. Yeah, you did. Had a bag of dicks, remember? You did have a bag of dicks. I was confused when you said it. Dicks burgers, and you were saying how you love a bag of dicks, remember? You did have a bag of dicks. I was confused when you said it. Dicks burgers, and you were saying how you love a bag of dicks.

What a burger. In-N-Out burger. What was that other place with the fucking little yellow ones? Burger Phil. Biggins. Burgers, burgers, burgers. Burgers, burgers. Burgerama.

Burgers R Us. Burgers R Us. Burger Depot. Five Guys. You didn't have a Five Guys this trip. No. Randy, how many burgers did you think you ate in the store? I think it might have been around a hundred. No, in the hundreds. A hundred? You ate a hundred in about fucking four days. No, a hundred was like ten a day. I had no idea a human could eat that many burgers in two weeks, man. 10 burgers a day!

It was fun fucking good friggin' burger, good beef in the States. Yeah. We went to Los Angeles. Yeah, that's right. Went to Los Angeles and Matt Groening from The Simpsons came out to see us. Yeah. That was pretty decent. Sebastian Bach. That was super cool.

Was there. D'Angelico Guitars gave me a couple of fucking guitars. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. That Ethan dude from the Shameless. Ethan from Shameless. He came out to the show. That was pretty cool.

The guy that plays Carl Gallagher. He was there. He's heard. Pedro. Pedro. Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite. Sebastian Bazzaroni. I said him already. Oh, fuck.

Uh, yeah, man, we were rolling there for a while. Yeah, it was awesome. It was pretty blurry, though. Barack Obama was there with his wife, Michelle? No, he wasn't there. Oh, Ricky, that wasn't Barack Obama. I don't think so. Nice fellow. That was a dream he had. He wasn't there. That was not Barack Obama. He did not come to our show. I wish he did, but he didn't.

Oprah was there? No. Nope. That was not Oprah. Was St did not come to our show. I wish he did, but he didn't. Oprah was there? No. No. Was Stedman, is that his name? Yeah, he wasn't there. Oprah and Stedman were not at our show. They should have been. They would have had fun.

Yeah, they probably would have. Yeah. Yeah, they probably would have had a good time. Homer. Yeah, Homer was there. Then we went where? San Diego and over to Arizona. Hot as fuck was there. Then we went where? San Diego and over to Arizona. Hot as fuck down there.

Hot. Then down to Texas. With a brief appearance in Mexico. We didn't go to Mexico. Did you go to Mexico? We probably crossed the border. Did you go into Tijuana? I think we might have for just like, just not that long.

I think you might have. I don't think I did. What did you do in Tijuana? Just hung out. Talked to a couple of cacti. Remember when we couldn't find him for about 14 hours? He was in Mexico. He was in Mexico.

It's called peyote. Oh, I'm drooling. Ricky, you're fucked. I don't think I've sobered up yet. I'm fucked. I mean, I've had 14 beer today, boys. I'm going to be honest. You're on a good fucking mission there, buddy.

I'm on a twist. I wonder what else of interest has happened on 420. Shall we try and find out? Let's try to find out, Ricky. Oh, Fenway Park opened in 1912. That's a cool place. Fenway Park, that's decent. Green Mile.

No, no, the Green something. Green Garburetor, whatever they call it. Green Monster. Yeah, that's it. Green Monster, man. Green Garbator, whatever they call it. Green monster, isn't it? Yeah, that's it. Green monster, man. Green Garburator. First known performance of Shakespeare's Macbeth in 1611. Holy fuck.

Who gives a fuck? That would have been a party. What do you mean, who gives a fuck? Who's he? Who's Shakespeare? No, the Macbeth guy. He was a bit of a fucking, he was a bit of a fucking he was bit of a prick Did he fuck with people he killed his wife? No, I wasn't him. That was another guy

He got charged with it. I don't think he did it make Is he still in prison Ricky? Did he get hauled into the police station and charged with it? There's a horse chase or something. High-speed horse chase. I don't remember that in the story. We should rewrite it. The Red Baron Boys. In 1918, the Red Baron shot down his 79th and 80th victim.

God, he was... Marking his final victories before his death the following day. Wow. Red Baron shot down number 78, number 80, 79, and number 80. Didn't some Canadian superhero shoot him down? Yes, Billy Bishop blasted the cocksucker out of the air. Imagine how good that would have felt.

Fuck you, Red Baron. Can you imagine the prayer that he would have had when he fucking flew back, got back to the hangar? Yeah, he flew back. Break open the fucking champagne. What's up, everybody? Just shot down the Red Baron. Ooh, ooh. Killed him.

Had his 80th kill yesterday, and I killed him today. He's like, let's fucking get it lit up, turn on the lasers. Ooh, ooh, Red Baron. The skies are safe. Once again. What? The skies are safe once again, boys.

He's got a bit of a southern drawl, man. The skies are safe once again. I shot down the Red Cocksucker, that German prick. What's this NASA shit? Where? NASA civilian pilot Neil Armstrong. Is he the biker? Oh, in 62, Neil Armstrong took the X-15 up to 63,000 meters. Is that a lot?

Civilian pilot? What does that mean? 63,000 meters, Ricky? That's like... I think a civilian means... That's like 180,000 feet. A civilian, I think, means you don't work for the man. So what, he's like fucking flying at United Airlines

and all of a sudden, boom? No, he took the X-15, which was the experimental supersonic. It looked like a big fucking weird pod that had a bunch of windows. Chuck Yeager flew the fucking thing. Well, he flew the X-1, but the precursor to this, Chuck Yeager flew it. Then Neil Armstrong took her up 180,000 feet.

I guess he was in a big bunch of trouble, and they were looking for somebody. So it's like, bud, you either go to jail or you got to take this little airplane up as high as you can. Who was? Neil Armstrong? Yeah, it was tax shit or something. He was not in trouble with the IRS. Drug dealer? No, he was not a drug dealer.

He was not in trouble with the IRS. He was a test pilot. Wasn't he running heroin back in the war or some shit? No. Neil Armstrong. He made it stretch pilot. Wasn't he running heroin back in the war or some shit? Neil Armstrong. He made a stretch Armstrong. Somebody. Because when you go up that high, you stretch.

Even the planes stretch. So that's where they came up with that stretch action. Did he have arms bigger than Julian? No, but when you stretch him out, it looks different. Neil Armstrong did not have gigantic muscles like Julian. So they were small but super strong. If he did, he wouldn't have been in the X-15. He was quite a tiny man, actually.

Neil Armstrong. Did you find him attractive? No, I wasn't attracted to Neil Armstrong. You just respected him and had a crush on him that way. I didn't have a crush on him, but he's contributed to American history. He was the first man to stand on the goddamn fucking moon. Can you imagine what that's like?

No. Plunking your feet down on the moon and being like, holy fuck, I'm on the goddamn moon. Looked dusty. Michael Jackson set an NBA playoff record with 63 fucking points in the game. Who did? He can sing and play basketball.

Who did? No, it's Michael Jordan, dummy. A lot of people said they were the same person. Who would say that? They look nothing alike. They're fucking, he's a giant. Who claimed that Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson were the same person? Michael Jordan was bald. It was the talk shows.

I think it was the late night guy. Ricky. Michael Jackson had nice hair. Nobody ever thought that. This is how conspiracy theories start, right here. Nobody in history. Oh, I remember what it was. They thought that Michael and Janet were the same person.

Was that it? Some people said that, Okay. But not Michael Jordan. He was a fucking seven foot tall basketball guy. I might have got that one fucked up a little bit. You're fucked. What in the fuck happened here in 1979 and 420? Imagine

1979, you smoked a big fucking gagger and all of a sudden a swamp rabbit comes out and attacks you. President Jim Carter was attacked by a swamp rabbit. What the fuck is that? Which swam up to his fishing boat in Plains, Georgia. I didn't know rabbits swim. So swamp monsters are real.

He got attacked by a swamp rabbit? What the fuck is a swamp rabbit? It's probably this giant fucking creature like you'd see on Scooby-Doo. Looks like a rabbit, I guess. Yeah, that's probably what it is, Rick. A Scooby-Doo fucking swamp monster. It's a rabbit. Well, I'll be the Loch Ness monster.

It'll look like a rabbit. I'll be the Loch Ness rabbit. Holy fuck, Ricky, you're fucked. I don't think his brain's going to come back, man. It's gone. He's too far gone now. I tell you, the drugs are getting a lot more powerful in the States. Okay.

Edibles? Mm-hmm. Oh, whoa, whoa. What about that tincture? Was that what it was called? Tincture. It's a liquor drink with weed infusing nations. Listen to this.

1972 on this day. Apollo 16. Who's he? Young and Duke. They landed on the moon with the Boeing Lunar Rover number two. Boeing made that shit, did they? Yeah. Are you surprised? I am a bit. I thought they only made planes. No, they made Lunar Rovers too.

Wow. They're very involved in the aerospace space. I wonder if involved in the aerospace space. I wonder if that's the guy's last name. Who? Bowen. Chad Bowen. He started the company.

Or is it just a made-up company name? I don't know, Ricky. We could research it if you really want to. I'm totally shocked he didn't fucking... Like, 1974, it's Paul McCartney and the Wednesday release. Nineteen, yes. 1974. Band on the Run 1974 band on the run the same go come out today and on the run what were they on what were they on the

run on the run and on the run and on the run we got in trouble and now we're a band on the run. Well, the night exploded with a steady crash as we fell into the sun. Then we robbed a bank and we almost killed a man. And now we're on the run. That's nice, man. Band on the run. That's not the words, but they didn't rob a bank and almost killed someone. What sort of trouble did they get into? They were a band on the run. That What sort of trouble did they get into?

They were a band on the run. That's all. Where were they running from? Their fans? Or the police? It doesn't matter. Or their wives? Or their mothers? Or their sisters? Bad friends? Enemies?

Doesn't matter. Oh, and in 1976, George Harrison from the Beatles, he sang the lumberjack song with Monty Python. That was a big fuck you to Paul. I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay. I sleep all night and I work all day. I cut down trees, I press wildflowers, I go to the lavatory. That was a big fuck you to Sir Paul is what that was. No, it wasn't. It's like, oh, fuck, 1974 and 420, you're gonna put out an album,

right? Well, guess what, bud? 1976, 420's mine. Taking over the 420 again. Fuck you, Sir Paul. I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay. I sleep all night and I work all day. That was a great song

Excuse me Jackson. I want some Wish I could throw up on you right now I'm glad you got no puke in you Ricky who got burnt on 420 luckiest people in the world Imagine getting born on 420 fuck people like that are lucky fuck Who got born? Adolf Hitler. Oh, man, are you kidding me? Adolf Hitler, 1889, Austrian-born German dictator.

That if he would have smoked a bit of pot, he probably would have chilled out and said goodbye. He was a dictator and fuhrer of Nazi Germany. Maybe this taking over the world shit is a little too much. Born in Gastorf-Zumpalmer, Braunau, and in Austria-Hungary. Fuck him. You know what? Adolf Hitler

can take a big hydraulic sock of my nuts. You better hope he doesn't hear that. He'll come and fucking take you down. He's not alive, Ricky. I thought he was

living in the Caribbean. Somebody told me. No, that was years ago. South America, Ricky. He's gone, man. I thought he was living in the Caribbean. Somebody told me. No, that was years ago. South America, man. He lived in South America. He got away. That dirty cocksucker did not die in that bunker.

I'll tell you right now, he made it down to Argentina. And he fucking, you know, he was trying to build the Fourth Reich. Yeah. But I'm going to state right now, Adolf Hitler

and fucking Goebbels and Himmler and all those guys, I'd like to put them in a big circle and they can all take big hydraulic sock on my nuts. All right. Yeah. That's a nice... What's that? That sounds like a fucking shit show is what that sounds like. It's okay. We can just work through it, guys. No that sounds like. It's okay.

We can just work through it, guys. No, but listen. It's just terrible. Somebody's partying. Terrible singing. Terrible. Somebody's partying. Somebody's drunk on a microphone.

Yeah. Somebody's partying. Move along. Yeah. Somebody's partying. Who else do we got? George Takai. Who's that fuck?

Sulu. Oh, I love him. Holy fuck, he's old. Star Trek. He's a smart. He's partying. Who else do we got? George Takai. Who's that fuck? Sulu. Oh, I love him. Holy fuck, he's old. Star Trek. He's a smart, he's really smart. He's old as fuck. Yeah, but he's handsome, as it could be. He doesn't look that old.

He's the most handsome cast member on Star Trek. He was born in 37. How old is he? I wonder why you like him so much. I heard that him and Captain Kirk had an affair. That's what I heard. He's like 80. What kind of an affair? Well, he's a very handsome man.

Captain Herc? He's 81. Sulu, man. His name's George Takai. He's 81 years old, and he's still, you know what? He's on Twitter just fucking giving it to Donald Trump. Nice. He doesn't give a fuck.

He just gives it to him. He doesn't give a fuck. But he gives it to us. He doesn't give a fuck. But he's Sulu, so... Sulu. Did you just say he had an affair with William Shatner? That's what I heard.

Oh, Randy. Fuck off. Randy. Lucky whore-a, maybe. Not fucking Shatner. Who's you whore-a? You whore-a. The one that was, you know...

What, Chekhov? Not Chekhov. You whore-a. The nice one with the you know. What, Chekhov? Not Chekhov. Yohora. The nice one with the nice cans. And that's her name? Hora? No. Yohora.

You Hora. Oh, man. Hora. But not a whore. You Hora! No, Ricky. Yohora. She was the one that would, she would bring up the, you know.

It's not a very good name. It's mean. Whenever they needed to fucking call somebody. Communications. Yes. She was the communications the, you know. It's not a very good name. It's mean. Whenever they needed to fucking call somebody. Communications. Yeah, she was the communications director, I believe. Whenever they needed to fucking raise somebody on the comms. Hail them. Hail them.

That's what it was. Yohora, can you hail that? She was a big part of beaming people up and shit, too. She was involved. Yeah, she was into that. She knew how to beam. She was hot. She knew how to beam. So was hot. She knew how to beam.

So it wasn't an equal opportunity spaceship. Where the fuck did that come from? How do you even know about equal opportunity? Well, she should have been higher up maybe. Yehora? Yeah. No, she was higher. She was up there. She was on the bridge, man. She was up there. She was on the bridge, man. She was on the bridge. Who was on the bridge? We had fucking Kirk. Spock. Sitting next to each other. McCoy.

Chekhov. Dr. Crazy Man. McCoy would come up on the bridge all the time. McCoy was up there a lot. Yehora. Scotty. Chekhov. He was in the bridge a lot.

He was down in the engine room. He was down in the engine room, but that cocksucker had access to the bridge. He had access to the bridge. Sulu. Yeah. I've got no more power. What? I've got no more power.

Scotty was down below. Scotty was drunk. You know that guy was fucking- He was a Scottish alcoholic. He was drinking tons of scotch, man. He was drunk all the fucking time. He didn't sound like that, but he was... He didn't like to put his ship through too much. That's why he was such a drunk man.

He was like, no, he was giving her. He didn't like to push the engines to the limit, the warp drive, because once you fuck up a warp drive... You're done. You're in serious trouble. I've fucked with warp drives. How fast are they at warp six Randy oh my fuck you so dumb man Jessica Lange oh really Jessica Lange the hottest lady in

America she used to date King Kong oh no she was in King Kong she didn't date King Kong Ricky you the fuck would date King Kong? You've got a problem with gorillas. What are you going to do on a date with King Kong? Go to the movies? And he rips the fucking ceiling off the theater? You do whatever the fuck he says.

He rips the roof off the theater and sits in about 40 seats because his arse is fucking 40 feet wide? Luther Vandross. Who. Luther Vandross. Who? Luther Vandross. Luther Vandross. Remember he used to dance to his music?

I love Luther Vandross. He died in 2005. He was born in New York City. I didn't even know he got died. That sucks. Here's to you, bud. Got Luther Vandross. Crispy Glover.

Who? Crispin. Not Crispy. He was the dad, right? What kind of a name would Crispy be? What kind of a name is Crispin? Well, it's a name, but Crispy would mean that you were... You've been left in the oven too long.

Your parents forgot about it. Crispin is basically a surfer term for Crispy. Dude, we're Crispin! Your parents forgot you in the oven when you were a baby and became Crispin. Look at that, Bush. Which guy was he, the dad? That guy was weird.

No, Crispin Glover was McFly, the old dad. No, but when he went back in the future, he was the guy that was in high school. Oh, McFly. Hello, McFly. You know what's really freaky, boys? I just turned this thing on that I found in Dallas, which is really cool. It's 420, and it's 420 today.

Looked at the clock on this thing, 420. It's 420 p.m. So it's 420 on 420. We got to light up, or we're gonna die instantly. Isn't that how that works? Light it up, Ricky. I don't know. It's fucking, it's not here. Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

All right boys, I got some figures that came in for how much we made in this tour. Let's hear it. You guys are gonna fucking shit yourself. Really? After expenses, food, flights, fucking bus, two weeks. Yeah. Bubbles, Ricky, you guys made 737 bucks, 27 cents. Fuck off. How much? Each? 737 bucks, 27 cents. Fuck off. How much?

737 bucks cleared. Each? Each. Holy fuck. I made 700 bucks? You made 737.27. Oh, I could live like a king for the next year. What did I make, Julie? Best day in a while.

Randy, okay, just a second. You are in the red, my friend. What does that mean? You're in the red. You owe What is that? You're in the red you owe us a hundred and thirty eight bucks. Frig off Holy fuck Brandy. How much did you eat man? Excuse me, the burgers were free. No, they weren't free What do you think it was like free burgers was run toward no we had to pay for it So you're fucker it was 138 bucks there There's going to be 29% interest on that.

And I want it immediately. This is bullshit. You got deducted. That was a pretty successful tour, boys. I made 700 bucks. 700 fucking 3727. Let's do tour and more. Boys, I can live like a king for a fucking year.

All right, boys. I didn't want to tell you this, but, you know, right now, well, right now is a good time. We're going to go over to Europe in September. Don't know where it is, but let's do it. We've been there, man. Decent. Ricky, you've been there three times now. We're going to go to Iceland.

What? Fucking right. That sounds cold. It's cold, yeah. I'm going to Iceland. I'm going to Iceland in September, but. Decent. Rack you, Vic? Julian, I need it. I think so, yeah. I'm going to Iceland. I'm going to Iceland in September, bud. Decent. Reykjavik?

Julian, I need it. I think so, yeah. I need more pain. Can we go to Amsterdam, please? Come on, Julian. We are going? Yes, I think we are going to Amsterdam. We're going to Amsterdam.

I love you guys. This is a place we've never been to, boys. Belfast. Belfast, Ireland. Yes. Finally doing it. I'm excited about that. Oh, I'm fucking excited about that, too.

They like to get their drinks going. And we're still going to Dublin, which is really fucking it. I'm excited about that. I'm excited about that, too. They like to get their drink. And we're still going to Dublin, which is really fucking cool. Dublin and Belfast, I love it. Randy, you're going to have to come do some work to make up that money. I need to get paid a bit more. Burgers are more expensive there. Well, you're going to have to negotiate with somebody then, aren't you? For fuck's sakes.

Excuse me. You're lucky you were fed for two weeks and had a place to stay. That's right. Boys, maybe we should go get some drinks. For fuck's sakes. Excuse me. You're lucky you were fed for two weeks and had a place to stay. That's right. Boys, maybe we should go get our... go get some drinks. I need... I need something. I need to... What was your guys' favorite part of the tour? Oh, just spending...

I know what yours was, Randy. Your little fucking smashing guts with everybody all around the nation. There's some beautiful, beautiful guts in America. Why did that turn you on so much, smashing your gut against another gut and grabbing guts and shaking them? I liked them. Where was your favorite gut? It's hard to say.

Zeke? Zeke was great. There was a couple guys who had fucking just enormous guts. There was that guy Fabian had the good jiggle. Yeah. Man, some of those fucking guts were almost seven feet. They were as tall as me. There was one that was 69 inches.

That's a... 70. Wasn't there a 70? Maybe 70. 71, 70. My favorite part of the tour was just spending time with my best friends. Thanks, Bubbles. Not you, Randy. That's not you Randy. He's talking about me. He's talking about Ricky and Julian.

My favorite part about the tour was getting paid. 700, well a little bit more than that. You got more than I did? I had to take off a bit of something there because of office fees and shit like that. My favorite part about the tour was just meeting everybody and all the great wonderful drugs that people gave me. Thank you again for all the tinctures, the drugs, the edibles, the smoke.

Ricky, how many drugs do you think you've ingested on this fucking tour? It's enough to take down a small town. I gave away about fucking three pounds and all we can't even give, we're going to the fucking border of bullshit and fucking Tempe. Stop spitting on me, for Christ's sake. Wherever the fuck it was. Why is the goddamn border crossing in the middle of this bloody goddamn country? Because. But we gave it away, which is good.

Because of people like you, that's why, Ricky. We buried some, we gave some away, we bribed some people. Well, we're just going to come back here some other time and dig those up and get good and high, bud. All right. That's what I'm saying. Love you guys. Okay, so I guess tune in next week when I have no fucking idea what happens. Thank you for buying two carton of cards.

Hopefully Randy's not here anymore. Yeah. With a stink. I don't stink that bad. Randy. I don't stink that bad. Randy. You don't stink that good. Oh, my God. You smell like a York's meat pot.

Gross.