Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 170 - Tooth Brushing with Beer

Episode Date: November 19, 2018

The Boys get an early start today, with a rum and Coke and the stein full of Green Bastard! It's time to get drunk and drink till next Wednesday - and Bubs is six beers in already. Does waking up spread eagle mean something good must have happened?!? Episode 170 is brought to you by the official Trailer Park Boys Store, SwearNet.com (the only place to watch the video of this podcash), Liquormen's Ol' Dirty Canadian Whisky, and the Boys' own Freedom 35 lager!  

Welcome to the Trailer Perk Boys podcast, brought to you in perkboysswearingit.com, the only place where you can see the video version of this podcast. Nice one. And go to trailerperkboysmerch.com and check out some merch, buy some stuff, please. They sponsor us too. What about the beer and the liquor? I was just getting to that, Richard. Also sponsored by Freedom 35, Drink the Dream, and Leckerman's all-dirty Canadian whiskey.

And a new beer is born. Try my new Ricky's Catch-23 malt liquor. It's stronger than you are. Okay, boys. What? Is it the time? We're doing it. Get the stein, I see. I brought my steiner. That's dumb.

My big Icelandic stein. Fuck, I feel powerful when I drink out of this cocksucker. You look like a dick, though, bud. Let me just... Straight up. Oh, I look like a dick. Do I? That looks much better than what you have.

Okay there, fucking... How's the bank heist going? How's the bank heist going? Bank heist? Yeah. What's not happening? Well, you're dressed for it. Here we go.

Oh, yeah. All right, what's up, fuckers? This is the official Turtle Prep Boys podcast coming up, fuckers? This is the Fish and Turtlerpup Boys podcast coming at you right now. This is episode, uh, one... One-sixty-seventy.

Mr. Prepared. Mr. Prepared shooting his lips off. I'm prepared. Shooting his lips off to me. Friday, November the 16th. One-seventy.

That's a lot of fucking podcasts I am going to ingest a delicious Green bastard IPA Brewed by me Put into my giant stein And then right in my gizzard Friday afternoon.

Let's get drunk, boys. You want to get drunk? Well, if you want to get drunk, I'm in. We don't normally get drunk on Fridays. Yeah. Yes, we do. We get drunk every Friday. How many Fridays have we missed since we were...

Well, you know what? It's true. We don't get drunk on Fridays. We get drunk on Thursdays we get drunk on thursdays and stay drunk until wednesday yeah basically get it drunk all the time recce drunk all the fucking is that a bad thing boys this is my sex beer sex beer already yeah it's like noon. I know. I drank one as soon as I got up because there was no water in my fridge. There was only beer. And you plan on continuing to drink all fucking day?

Is that what you're doing? I had to brush my teeth with beer this morning. Okay, well, just make sure you don't get too fucked up. I'm not going to get... When have I ever got too fucked up? It happens. It happens. No, it doesn't.

You just don't remember a fucking thing. I always have my back. You always have fucking memory loss, bud. I've seen you sleep in a fucking shopping cart outside your shed. Many times. Was that an on-purpose decision? You get right huggy and shit when you're drunk. Ricky, at least I don't wake up with no fucking pants on.

If you wake up with no pants on, it means something good probably happened. But I don't wake up outside with no pants on, like on my back, spread eagle, facing the road. You should try it sometime. It's good to be adventurous. Facing the road. Outside's good. In a tree. Wherever.

Yeah, sleeping in a tree. There's a fucking raccoon. I wasn't talking about sleeping. Don't, but... Banging. Although raccoons are good at it. So you've banged in a tree before, Rick. Is that what you're saying?

Holy fuck, did I tell you about the raccoon that was in your barbecue cover last night? No. I thought it was you. Saw the barbecue cover moving, and it was something about this big. I went over, and I was like, Ricky, and I left it up. It was a fucking raccoon that big.

I'm not joking. A cocksucker was that big. You better fuck off. You better watch yourself, man. Those things are fucking vicious. Oh, he came at me. I swung a rake at him. I'm not afraid of fucking raking. No, Ricky, I'm telling you, he was bigger than a fucking dog. He was about a 75ake at him. I'm not afraid of fucking raking. No, Ricky, I'm telling you,

he was bigger than a fucking dog. He was about a 75-pounder. He was a good 75 to 100 pounds, and I'm not exaggerating. Well, I got 15 bullets that say I'm faster than he is. You can't shoot him, Ricky. Why? Because he's just a raccoon trying to live his life.

If he came at me like he did with you, done. If I put up a sign that says, no trespassing by raccoons, and he does, he's fair game. If he doesn't read your sign. Right. Well. He can't read.

I'll draw a picture with a fucking line through it. He'll be able to read that. What are you coloring, Ricky? I don't know what it is. Some kind of a stoned demon. Ooh. I've got a deep buzz on for it. All right, what are we doing today?

All right. I don't know. I'm reading the stories. It's kind of fucked up. All right. We've got a very special guest today. Who? I want everybody to welcome... Julian. Hey, Julian. Hey, Julian.

How's it going, bud? I'm here fucking every podcast. Are you? Yes. Jesus, I didn't know. What are you trying to fucking say, that I'm sitting over here doing nothing? Kind of. I always you trying to fucking say, that I'm sitting over here doing nothing? Kind of. I always prepare for these fucking podcasts. I wish I hadn't prepared for this one. Why?

A couple of disturbing things I stumbled on. All right. Let's hear them, Ricky. No, I was doing a story I wanted to talk about. All right, I just want to throw this denier out there, okay? Okay, bubs. It's just a little fucking, you know. Scenario?

No, scenario. Serial? No, man. Just, okay, what if this happened to you guys? You're a scientist. You're down in Antarctica, right? Yeah. There's nobody fucking around.

It's just you and your other fucking buddy that... Which would be awesome. He's not really your buddy. He's a co-worker, okay? Yeah. You've been working with this motherfucker for four years. Yeah. You got nothing to do.

When you're not working, you're fucking sitting around reading all the time. Yeah. So this guy's reading books. They got all kinds of books. The other fucker keeps telling him the ending of the book once he gets right into it. And he keeps doing it and doing it and doing it for four years. Spoiler alert. Yeah.

So what would you do to that guy? Ask him not to do that anymore. What if he keeps doing it and doing it and doing it. Spoiler alert. Yeah. So what would you do to that guy? Ask him not to do that anymore. What if he keeps doing it? Kill him. What do you do? Frankie. Huh? No one else is around.

I don't know. Go read a book. Go over the hell and read a book. No, you're stuck in a fucking tent with this guy, basically. Or a building, right? You can't go go anywhere start pissing in his corn flakes that probably would have been a good idea you know what this guy did why steak knife right in the chest he did he killed this is like these guys are like 55 52 years old i was sort of joking about the killing part but you should have killed him well almost the guy's home he's he's alive i

guess but this is the first attempted murder case ever in antarctica how's the medical how's the medical care in it there there isn't any record there's no fast and stuff hello man there's no ambulances you can't call 9-1-1 if you call 9-1-1 his phone rings She can't call 911. If you call 911, his phone rings. What else happened? I'm trying to see. Oh, yeah.

It was like, well, there's a few billion people. That is a prick job, though. That's a fucking prick job. He sort of just threatened his life. If I ruin one more ending, I'm going to kill you. Or maybe he did. I don't know. That is a prick job because that's your only form of enjoyment. I'm going to read a book.

This is going to be fantastic. And then Earth'shole gives it away. Yeah, you read, like, you know, two, three hundred pages, and all of a sudden, hey, you know how that ends? Blah, blah, blah. You fucking asshole. I'm just trying to think of the aftermath. Just the two of them.

One guy stabs the other. They can't go to a hospital. So does he repair himself? Does the other guy repair him and the friends again? I mean, he's still got to hang out with the guy. How does that go? Buddy's going to go to jail, man, for attempted murder. Come on.

There's no one else there. No, he felt bad. He had to give himself in. He was like... To who? The polar bears? Well, you know what? He should have did.

He should have said... He should have called the mainland and said, Holy fuck, my buddy just stabbed himself. Yeah. I don't think he's going to make it. I think he went crazy from the solitude. They only had two fucking TV channels, man. They'd have a small library, a gym, and they had tons of vodka.

So I think this guy got drunk one morning. Well, you know what? My agatha Christie sleuthing skills tell me there's more to this story. I think it was a lover's dispute. I agree. You got, they're alone too long. Things happen. Things go down.

What do you mean things happen? I think it was a lover dispute. Okay, Bub, so you're saying if you were fucking in a place like Antarctica with Ricky, or maybe Randy, how about Randy? You're with him for four years, and all of a sudden, you know, you become buddies and you start banging. Is that what you're saying? No, I'm not saying that at all.

I'm saying I think they were. Not me. I live here and I don't do that. But I think they, maybe, they became a couple and then one of them got caught cheating. With who? With a penguin or something. Jesus Christ. So you're saying the scientist was With a penguin or something. Jesus Christ.

So you're saying the scientist was bagging a penguin. He might have been. Buck, I wish we could call him and ask him. Oh, he's wild. He could be like, Buck, you figured me out. He's in Russia right now, and he's on host of fucking arrest for attempted murder. Oh, he's a Russian?

Yeah. Does it say what TV channels they had? No, just two Russian channels, man. I guarantee you they weren't the fucking greatest TV channels in the world. Well, they had RT, probably. What's that? Russian Times. All right.

What's that, news and shit? The Russian Times is a Putin-fed propaganda channel. All right. What are you enjoying over there, Richard? Some kind of... little bit of everything I left in the cupboard with purple Kool-Aid. Jesus juice, is that what they call it?

Ricky. What? Pretty gross. Just old, dirty leckers. It's gross. What's in there? Gin. I know you had gin. Oh, I? Pretty gross. Just old, dirty leckers. It's gross. What's in there? Gin? I know you had gin.

Bro, I don't even like gin. It's always in the cupboard because I don't like it. Gin tastes like Christmas trees. Gin sucks. That fucking green bottle with the dirt on it. Remember the time you took the water out of the base of the Christmas tree holder and told Corey it was gin. He drank it, too.

He drank the whole fucking thing. He thought it was straight gin. And I said the pine needles were part of the pieces of the gin. Look, he's dumb. And he drank a whole glass of Christmas tree water. And then he was puking his guts out, and he just thought he drank too much. Yeah, he thought he was wasted.

What an idiot. Well, he was, because he was puking his guts out and he just thought he drank too much. Yeah, he thought he was wasted. What an idiot. Well, he was because he was poisoned. What do you got over there, Rick? You said you had some fucked up stories? I know what people got born to there. Who? Who got born? Born.

Who was born? Father of the Blues. Don't talk like him, man. Father of the Blues? Yeah. him, man. Father of the Blues? Yeah. W.C. Handy. Yeah. What year?

1873. Yeah. I wonder how their family got their last name. I wonder what they were good at. What do you mean? Didn't you get names for a reason back then? Yeah, like a blacksmith. That's where those names came from.

Handy. What do you think? Good at handies. Ricky. Or they were just handy people. I don't think W.C. Handy's name came from the fact that his family was good at giving handies. Well, they must have been handy men. Did you even call them handies back then?

I doubt it. Just ask them, man. I'm fucking chill. When have you ever seen a fucking old western movie where somebody's like saunters into the whorehouse and says, I'm looking for a handy? Nobody says that. No. They walk in and say, I'm looking to do some fucking.

Yeah, they've never said, like, I need to get jerked or jacked or, you know, it's none of that. Just go right upstairs, pay their money. Best old West movie ever made or TV show. Bonanza was kick-ass. Bonanza? TV shows. Western?

Are you kidding me? Fuck yeah, man. Lee Majors was in that. Bonanza was fucking terrible. It was good back when I was young. What'd you like? How about Deadwood? Oh, okay, Deadwood.

Bonanza. Let's watch Bonanza. Hey, man, it's the first fucking thing that came into my head, all right? Used to watch Bonanza. Let's pour a glass of Kool-Aid

and watch Bonanza. Hold hands and talk about our feelings. Fucking Deadwood, baby. A lot of people like fucking Bonanza. What about High Hold Silver? Lone Ranger. Fucking Deadwood, baby. A lot of people like fucking Badans. They're like, what about High Hold Silver? Lone Ranger.

Yeah, it was good. Well, I don't know if it was. What's up with you fucking dissing all these old Western shows, man? I was just never a fan of those type things. Lone Ranger. Burgess Meredith got born today. He played the penguin in Batman. No, he didn't. Oh, the original

one, yes. Yes, yeah. Then he was in Rocky. One of Julian's favorite movies. Yes, Burgess Meredith. Shirtless Sylvester Stallone. By the way. What? Mm-hmm. A new Rocky. Yeah. Who's in it? Uh, I don't know. The same people in the last one. Not Sylvester Stallone. Yes, he is. Who's in it? I don't know.

The same people in the last one. Not Sylvester Stallone. Yes, he is. He's a trainer, though, I think. Or he might fight Dolph Lundgren's coming in to this movie as well. The boys will be getting in shape. Oh, my God. What, are they going to be fucking swinging their walkers at each other?

Why would they be, man? They're in good shape, those fuckers. Rocky 20. Who cares, man? It'll in good shape, those fuckers. Rocky 20. Who cares, man? It'll make money, right? All right. It will. Let's get these over with.

Dwight Gooden, pitcher. Diana Krall, Canadian jazz pianist. Fantastic pianist. She is. Pianist. Dean McDermott, Canadian actor. Fantastic. Who?

Dean McDermott. He was in American Horror Story. Another fantastic TV show that the bubbler watches. Have you seen that show? Bits and pieces. Lisa Bonet. Lisa Boner, you mean. Used to give Julian Boner. Lisa Boner.

What was that movie, Angel Her? Yes. What happened to her in that? She get the nasty. She was a bit freaky, man. She was on Cosby's show. Yeah, she was. But she was...

That was just pretendies. That was just pretendies. What was pretendies? Her being all, you know, Cosby-like. Oh. Oh, yeah? Yeah. She was pretty wild, apparently. I wonder if she ever got roofied. Ricky, why would you say that?

Wasn't there some of that going on? From Bill Cosby? I don't... Ricky. Jesus, Ricky. He's in... The man is in jail. Oh, no, I know. I'm not fucking defending Bill fucking Cosby.

All right, for a minute there, I thought I got all that dreamt. No, no. He was a dirty fucker. But I don't think he was doing that to the kids on set.

Geez. Was she a kid? I don't even remember. Well, she was pretty young, and she was on the show. I don't think remember. Well, she was pretty young, and she was on the show. I don't think... So she's off limits? But who knows?

No, maybe he was. Creepy cocksucker. Yeah? That would be weird. Right, who else? Maggie Gyllenhaal? Who? She related to Jake. Did you pass out there? Did you doze off?

I think something I might have for a second. Did I fall asleep? Well, you stopped breathing. Benson Henderson. Who's that now? Another one of Julian's MMA guys. Benson Henderson. Yeah? You don't know him? Fuck. Who's that now? Another one of Julian's MMA guys. Oh.

Benson Henderson. Yeah? You don't know him? No. I know a Henderson. Didn't know his name was Benson. He must be a tiny guy. He only liked the real people.

I only know one Benson. The guy from the show? Yes. He was a wonderful man. What was Benson's last name? Don't know. Who were the other characters on the show? Don't know.

Clayton Endicott III. Okay. Mrs. Krause. All right. You're just a fucking... Do you remember? I used to watch Benson. Do you remember Mrs. Krause?

I remember them all. Every time somebody would say something about Mrs. Krause, she would go, I can hear you from the other room. That was the piece. I don't remember that. You don't remember that? No. I wonder if she was actually in the other room

if they desired that voice later. She wasn't in the other room. It was a set, Ricky. I don't even know what that means. And the governor, remember how stupid the governor was? Yeah. He was fucked. Pete Davidson., remember how stupid the governor was? Yeah. He was fucked. Pete Davidson.

Wasn't he in the gasoo? No, Ricky, that's Pete Townsend. Fuck. Pete Davidson was just engaged to Ariana Grande. Oh, yeah, yeah. You fucking know your shit, folks. Just says that here. He's from Saturday Night Live.

Yes. Very funny fella, too. He's hilarious. Yeah. Not Yes. Very funny fella, too. He's hilarious. Yeah. And just real funny these days, though. What's their name? And then they broke up. I'm sure that'll work out.

No, they broke up already. Yeah, I was going to say. Fucking kids. They're already done. Why are you even trying to get married? I think he had some tattoos of her and everything. Oh, he got tatted up, man. Big mistake.

Yeah, that's a fuck-up. Well... you gotta just throw caution to the wind sometimes. Imagine if you would've married some girl that you were dating in your early 20s. Would it have worked out? And you had a tattoo of her on your wiener or something. I don't have that tattooed on my wiener anymore.

Anymore? Well, I had the last supper on there, remember? Oh, she did not. I had the last supper tattooed on my wiener. No, you didn't. That time we went to Vegas, I woke up and I had the last supper tattooed on my wiener. Would you get a tattoo on your wiener for a chick, though, you're in love with? Would you?

No. Like, if you're married to her and shit? No. She said, hey, tattoo the wiener. No, I don't want you to. I want you to say, if you're married to Diane, say, I want you to put on your wiener, property of Diane. Or you're not getting any more banging.

What would you do then? Who's Diane? That's just a make-believe person that you got married to. You're married. Well, maybe I would then if I was married to her. Totally would, man. Why are you so obsessed with imagining my wiener getting held and a tattoo gun coming in?

I'm just asking you a question. Just getting right close to right on it. I wasn't thinking about it fucking... You were envisioning, Dr. Mike. Well, now we all are. I don't know what you'd do for love, bud. Jesus. It had nothing to do with me looking at your...

Are you picturing that now, Rick? Yes, I don't want to. Get out of my mind. Talk about something new. Why do they have to cup it like that? Well, they're holding it. It goes along here so they can write on the shaft. R-I-C-K-Y.

You're going to get Ricky tattooed on your wiener, aren't you? Property of Ricky. Great. There you go. It's going to go over well. That would be funny if we got Cory drunk. Got him to tattoo property of Ricky on his wiener. We're not gonna tattoo his wiener, man.

No, not us, but somebody would. Somebody? Who? What's-his-name down at the tattoo place would do it for us. He does wieners? If you pay him enough, I bet you would. He should have a neon sign advertising that. He does wieners? If you pay him enough, I bet you would. He should have a neon sign advertising that. We do wieners. Bet he'd get a lot of business.

Oh, yeah. There's tons of people looking to get that done. I bet it would. Do you think it would hurt? Hello. Hello in there. That sounds like you need another fucking drink, bud. Well, there's still quite a bit in there.

That fucking mug drives me nuts. What have you got for stories, Ricky? Uh, they're fucking weird. Really weird. Perfect. I love really weird stories. Nothing much, bud. You eat all the popcorn. You cocksucker. I'm hungry, man. The first one is gonna... It's weird.

I mean, everybody's done it, but it didn't work out very well for this guy. All right. Smeared some peanut butter on his cock and balls. Why? Well, for his bulldog. What? You know, a lot of people do that, but this guy... No, just back up. You started this story with everybody's done this,

but it didn't work out well for this guy. Well, a lot of people have tried it, I'm sure. Have you tried it? I don't have any comments about this topic. So you've tried it, so... No. You've had a dog... I rarely own a dog.

So you've had a cat. So a stray dog. Or some kind of animal. So a stray. So what happened? He put peanut butter on his balls. Yeah, and the fucking bulldog ate them. Aw, Ricky, don't tell me that.

Ate his balls. And his cock. No, not his cock. I swear to God. What a stupid fuck. And his balls. And his cock. No, not his cock and his balls. I swear to God. What a stupid fuck. He almost died. Wrecked.

He should have died. They found him almost bleeding to death. And at first he made up some fucking story that his roommate smeared peanut butter on his balls and held him down and let the dog eat. But then that would be jail time. But then he finally admitted that it was him. What a fuck up. I admitted that it was him. What a fuck-up.

I guess the dog was nice. The dog's name was Biggie Smalls. Yeah, and apparently he loves peanut butter to the point where he will attack to get it. So did they put the dog down because now he's got the taste for balls in his fucking head? No, he has a taste for peanut butter. So he ate his cock and balls.

Yeah, and the worst part was they couldn't, they can't reattach it because they're eaten and digested. Jumping. So he swallowed them. Yes, he ate, that's what ate means. Didn't bite. Is this guy still alive? Barely.

He almost died. So what are they going to do with his package? I don't know. Bionic? I don't know. Can you get transplants and that type of stuff? You can get a fake Beans and Wieners on there. He'd be more than the $6 million man. He's not going to be banging like he used to.

Or he's going to be banging ten times as powerfully. That's true. So it could be a good thing, it might be a bad thing. But it's not going to have any feeling in it. He'll have a Ken bump. He's going to have a Ken bump, I would say. Fuck. A smooth Ken bump.

So next time you go to rub peanut butter on your genitals, you better think twice. Hmm. You should, we should film a public service. Like one of those after school, you know,

PSAs. There should be a warning on a peanut butter jar. The more you know. One of those. Warning, do not smear on genitals. Is there a lot of people

doing that, do you think? I've heard of a lot. Putting peanut butter on their balls. He started the story with everybody's I know, I'm asking i'm asking because i want this i mean i didn't do it voluntarily who did it then ricky it was passed out and somebody did it for a prank at a party it's fucked there was a toy poodle weird way to wake up no think about this i wouldn't even want

a toy poodle something great happened and then you see the image of a dog's face looking at you. Sensually. It's weird. It's not worth the risk, man. It's weird. But can you imagine even a small dog biting your nuts? You woke up, and there was a dog looking at you sensually? Is that a word?

It's a word, yeah. It's a fucking word, and in this context, it is used in a weird way. Anyway, that poor Scottish bastard lost his package. He was Scottish? Yeah.

Hmm. Interesting. Was he drunk? I don't think he was, no He was home alone with his dog and thought it was a good idea Apparently, maybe not the first time, but the dog was like Holy fuck, the dog must have just went crazy He must have went overboard

Must have went overboard with the peanut butter this time So you think that's the problem? He used too much peanut butter. Well, if it was just a little dollop on one nut, at least he would have only lost the one nut. You know what he should have did? He should have fed the fucking thing before he let him lick his nuts. But then he's not going to lick it.

Yeah, he probably starved him for a couple days. I'm sure the dog will still lick peanut butter off your balls if he's got a full stomach. I think the dog was basically saying from experience no i definitely did not ever have you ever licked peanut butter off of anything no not off of anything nothing you know what what if he i'd say the dog was just sending a message listen bud i'm sick of licking your balls. So you think he's doing it all the time? I don't know.

Okay, now that's a whole different theory. The dog was sending him a message. Holy fuck! Did you guys hear about Whitey Bulger? Yeah. He got killed. Killed! But, like, they fucking...

They beat him with a sock with a fucking padlock in it, and then they tried to cut his tongue out. And gouge his eyes out. What? Oh, yeah, they fucking came right aboard him. Yeah. Holy fuck. They transported him to a different fucking prison

because he had health problems or something. He was there for one fucking day. One day. Holy fuck. And the fucking, you know, the mob was like, holy fuck, Whitey Bulger's going over to that place, and we've got this guy and this guy and this guy. Hey, boys, how you doing?

Get your padlocks ready. Fuck, that was a suck. It was a bloody mess, man. They had to go in, and they did it, and then they left, and they went back and tried to mop it all up. But the boys were just fucking covered in blood and shit, man. They clonked him with a padlock and a sock.

He was an old cocksucker. He was an old cocksucker. 89? Imagine dying like that. Well, it sucks, and you feel bad for him, but if you look what that guy did, he was not any friendlier than those guys, believe me. He did some awful fucking horrific things to people. Did he?

According to the internet, Whitey was not the... You did not want to be on his shit list. No. No. He, this whole taking your cock and balls from you... He would do the same thing, but no peanut butter. He would do that without a fucking without a fucking batman eye he wouldn't bite them off himself i can't imagine beating an old guy to death that would

be fucking awful it would be awful to beat an old guy to death beat anybody to death exactly a pleasant experience for anybody involved as far as I'm concerned. Alright. Well, that was a great story. What other ones? Do you have anything? Just this one about this fucking girl from England who claims she's banged over 20 ghosts and now she's engaged to one.

Are you fucking kidding me? Say that into my good ear. I know. I even watched her fucking interview. She banged 20 ghosts. Yep. And now she's engaged to a ghost. Apparently they're better lovers than real men. Wow.

She's got a... And she's fucking... She's not a bad looking girl. I don't really get it. It's weird. I get it. She's got a couple of screws loose yeah that's probably wants to have a wants to have a baby with this ghost she's engaged to

so they're asking her you know well is it going to be a human baby and she said well i'm hoping but if it's not you know it'll probably be a phantom baby well you know what if he believes in phantom pregnancies i guess that's that's her only way out of this. For her to actually have a ghost baby, that's the only way she can get out of fucking not looking like a crazy... Oh, no, she still looks... You know what? I feel bad for her. I feel actually sorry for her because she's clearly insane.

Out of her mind. Maybe she's not. Maybe she's happier than all of us. She sure fucking seems like it. She met her fucking fiancé, ghost, in Australia on a nature hike. And then she's like, normally when I sleep with a ghost, I have to leave the ghost at the scene because I can't really move around. She said, I was surprised when I was flying home.

He was on the plane. And they went to the bathroom, and now she's part of the Mile High Club. No, with a ghost. I swear. You're fucking kidding me. I swear. Wow. She fucked a ghost on an airplane.

Yeah. You know what? Too bad we couldn't get her on the podcast with us. Is there any contact number for her? Maybe we could call her up. I'm sure. I'm sure there's... She would love that.

Okay, boys. Here's the mission. Next podcast, we're going to try through the week to contact... Amethyst Realm. Realm? Well, it can't be that hard. There can't be too many of those. No, that's not a common name.

Amethyst Realm? Yeah, no, I don't know't know anybody oh there's a couple there's amethyst realm that works down at the at the super value and there's amethyst realm that works out at the irving gas station buzzer i am yeah we're going to try to contact her and have a skype call with her on the next podcast Hopefully we're talking to Amethyst Realm, the ghost fucker. All right. Can we go get drunk now? Can we stop this?

Yes, I need another beer. She was just sitting on the plane. All of a sudden, she felt the ghost. And the guy was like, what, are you going to hug her? She's like, no, no. I felt him like so i think he must be inside or in the seat and then they took it to the bathroom so he just ghost just float around and just fuck whoever they want okay that's quite a fucking right through clothing

too quite a thing well he's a ghost he can fucking he could be in between her skin and the clothing he could fit right in that little microscopic gap. And she said, yeah, he's been around for a long time. He's very wise. So he's good at banging, too, obviously. He's been fucking for centuries. He's been fucking for 200 years. Wasn't that a hip song?

Fucking for centuries. I've been fucking for centuries. I've been fucking for centuries. I've been fucking for centuries. And disappointing you get me down. Good singing, bubs. It's going to be a good night, boys. All right, boys, let's go get some liquor drinks. Karaoke and we're singing fucking for centuries.

I have been fucking for centuries.