Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 173 - Julian is Mr. Christmas

Episode Date: December 10, 2018

Let’s get 'er going, the festive season is coming and Julian's gonna be Mr. Christmas! Randy joins the Boys and stinks like Christmas spice. And guess where Ricky is right now…? Episode 173 is brought to you by the official Trailer Park Boys Store, SwearNet.com (the only place to watch the video of this podcash), Liquormen's Ol' Dirty Canadian Whisky, and the Boys' own Freedom 35 lager!

Welcome to the Trailer Perk Boys podcast, brought to you in perkboysswearingit.com, the only place where you can see the video version of this podcast. Nice one. And go to trailerperkboysmerch.com and check out some merch, buy some stuff, please. They sponsor us too. What about the beer and the liquor? I was just getting to that, Richard. Also sponsored by Freedom 35, Drink the Dream, and Leckerman's all-dirty Canadian whiskey.

And a new beer is born. Try my new Ricky's Catch-23 malt liquor. It's stronger than you are. I'm just chewing off air. Something wrong with this fucking thing, bubs. I'm just chewing off air. There's something wrong with this fucking thing, bubs. It used to be three-stop or something. See, I'm not even pressing it. That's a good one. Okay, let's go press this one.

Okay, here we go. All right, do you want to start this? Are you going to get it going or what? Well, you can if you want. We just want to sit here and talk about our feelings for a little while. I've been feeling a little blue lately. I'm not talking to you, Randy. I'm talking to Bubbles.

Why did you bring him? I just thought, you know what? This Christmas, I'm going to be fucking Mr. Christmas. All right? That's good. I'm into Christmas this year. Merry Christmas, Randy. Thanks. Merry Christmas to you, too. Jesus, Murphy, what is on you?

I'm wearing some of the Christmas spice. What, did you put actual pumpkin spice in your pits? I got some of those, what's that stuff that you kiss under? Mistletoe? If you rub that under your arms, it makes you smell better. It's true. What mistletoe? What? Mistlet under your arms, it makes you smell better. Sure. What mistletoe? What? Mistletoe's not even real.

It's plastic. It's plastic. No, it's like you buy the real stuff. You're fucked, Randy. Who the fuck do you think? All right, this is number,

what are we at? Number 173. Well, should I do the way I should? Because Ricky's not here, maybe I should. Do it. No, do it.

What's up, fuckers? It's the official podcast coming at you right now. This is episode fucking 173 bubbles. And I'm gonna do this? Do it up. Oh, baby. Brought to you by the Green Bastard. IPA.

Going down the hatch. That looks pretty good, man. All right, so it's Christmas time. IPA, going down the hatch. That looks pretty good, man. All right, so it's Christmas time. Ricky's not here, you may have noticed. Yes, I know, Ricky's not here. He's Christmas shopping. No, he's not Christmas shopping. He must be stealing, I betcha.

He got caught shoplifting, did you not know this? He got caught? Yes, he got caught and he's at the jail. And we gotta get him out. It's because he takes too much stuff. He looks too full. If he only took one thing, he wouldn't get caught, Bubbles. He got caught with a bunch of meat in his coat.

That's Obie's. All right, well, when he left this morning, he had his gun. Did he have his gun? Did they find the gun on him? I don't know. Ricky could be stupid. Stupid. See, that's the difference. If he has a gun, he might be fucked for Christmas. All I know, Dougie called me from jail and he said,

Ricky's in here. You gotta come deal with him. So we gotta do that. All right, does he want us to get him out, or is he staying in there for a little while? I didn't get to talk to Ricky, so I don't know if he wants to stay or if he wants to get out. You know what he's like. He might want to stay because there's a tournament,

a hockey tournament. All right. Let's get this going. That smells. No, I didn't even blow it on you, Randy. What the fuck? Okay, she's got to shorten her. Just leave it.

Okay, so what are we going to talk about today? I don't know. Other than feelings. We're not talking about our feelings. What have you been doing, Randy? I've been putting up some decorations. Yeah. Yeah, some lights around.

Yeah. But I don't like it because sometimes when one bulb goes out, the whole string goes out for frig sakes. Then you gotta check every friggin' bulb. When did you buy these Christmas lights? Back in 1975? I don't think they do that anymore. Those are old lights. Those are wired

in series. Get some new fuckin' lights. Well, they're good. I mean, you just gotta figure out which bulb. I know, but they're wired in series from the 70s for fuck's sake. Those are old Led Zeppelin lights.

And you're not really that bright of a guy, Randy. No offense. I can't afford friggin' And those are the ones where the bulbs get fuckin' red hot. Yeah, you don't put them

right on a real tree and it might catch fire. No, those are dangerous. You get a dry tree with one of those hot old fuckin' bulbs. I always keep a fire extinguisher right by the tree, though, just for safety. Do you know what LED is, Randy?

Did you ever hear of it? Yeah, TVs. Hmm. LED. You're Randy. He's technically correct. There are LED TVs. See, this is what, you know, I should have my fucking open, my Christmas store open right now.

This is why, bud. It's things like this. You could have came to the store. LED means light emitting diode. I have my Christmas store open right now. This is why, bud. It's things like this. You could have came to the store. LED means light-emitting diode. It's a new type of light, and it doesn't get hot. Get into the fucking 21st century, man. It doesn't use much fucking power, man.

Well, the power bill in Sunnyvale would be way lower if you switched to LED, energy-efficient bulbs. And you can pick whatever color you want. You want the bulb to be green? Green, red, orange, blue. Right? Yeah. I didn't know that, guys.

You guys are pretty smart. Oh, my fuck, Randy. Randy, here, you know what? You know what we can do to make yourself useful? What? Ricky Uzi does the birthday fucking things Birthdays? Ricky Uzi says what?

Who was born on this day Oh, okay, I can do that December 7th, who was born? Let's see here In 1904 Holy cow, that's a long time ago That's over a hundred something years Clarence Nash

You know who that is? American voice actor, Donald Duck. Donald Duck. Yeah. Yeah, he did Donald Duck. Can you do Donald Duck? I can't do Donald Duck, man. Can you do it?

No, I can't. Try it, Randy. I can't do it, man. That's pretty good. The world owes me a living. Do Donald Duck getting banged. I can't even do Donald Duck. No, but do it.

You just did, but do it like you're banging. That's funny, Julian. Can you do Donald Duck getting banged? Okay, how about you banging Donald Duck? Oh, my God. I like Donald Duck. Donald Duck's very handsome. Don't ever do that again.

If someone asks you, don't do it. I just think Donald is too mean to the nephews, Huey, Dewey, and Louie. He's mean to them because they're just out having fun, and he's just mean to them. Randy, when you were just imagining pumping Donald Duck for me. Don't get into this, Babs. When you were just envisioning that.

He's soft is all, like a pillow. He's a duck. I'm not going to go do real ducks, though. He's a cartoon duck. When you were picturing that, what were you picturing in your head? I was getting hungry. You were getting hungry, so you wanted to

bang him that he'd eat him? Duck is tasty. It's a little bit greasier than chicken. I'm going to bang this duck from behind, then I'm going to eat a fucking duck sandwich. Duck soup. I don't like duck soup. But anyway, I like Donald Duck. Happy birthday, Donald. 1923, Ted Knight.

Holy fuck, Ted Knight was that old, was he? Yeah, American actor. Was that Mary Tyler Moore? You know who Ted Knight is? Yeah, he's the guy who also did The Knight Rider. That's not the same fucking guy you gave me. That's not Ted Knight, you stupid bastard. That's fucking Michael Knight.

What was his name on Mary Tyler Moore? It was, uh... It was Ted. Was it Ted? I believe so. He died in 86. Yeah, he was on Too Close for Comfort, remember? No, man.

Too Close for Comfort, you don't remember that show? No. In San Francisco, the narrow little house that had the gay guy on there? No. What was the gay guy on there? No. What was the gay guy's name? You know. I don't have a clue, man. Come on, Randy. You used to love that show. I remember Three's Company. Yes. Same kind of, same time? No, this guy was, Jack Tripper wasn't actually gay. He was pretending to be gay. No, he was gay. No, he wasn't. He was pretending so that he could live with Cressy and Janet, you stupid bastard.

I read a story that he got it all with Mr. Roper. No, he didn't. No, he did not. Mr. Roper didn't want people living up there that weren't married, so he pretended he was gay. All right, did Jack ever have any, like, chicks come to the apartment? I don't remember that. Yes. I know the dude upstairs was the ladies' guy, the guy with the curly hair.

That was Larry. Larry was always know the dude upstairs was the ladies guy. The guy with the curly hair. That was Larry. Larry was always getting bad. Larry was greasy. Larry Dallas, to be exact. Larry was... Larry Dallas. That was his name. That's fucking amazing, man.

Larry Dallas lived upstairs, and he was always trying to get with Cressy and Janet, especially Cressy, because she was blonde. Did he ever bang them? No, Larry never got anywhere with Chrissy or Janet. They were too smart for her. And then remember Lana? Lana used to come over and she always wanted to fucking bang Jack

and Jack wasn't into Lana. Was Lana hot? Lana was, you know, she was 70s hot. 70s, okay. She wasn't 70 years old. No, no. Lana used to come over and do you remember Mrs. Roper? She was a horny old rag, wasn't 70 years old. No, no. Lana used to come over. And do you remember Mrs. Roper? She was a horny old rig, wasn't she?

She was. She was a horny old rig. She wanted it, yeah. Oh, my God. She just wanted it all the time. Mr. Roper wasn't into it. He was a sleeping man. Erectile dysfunction, maybe.

Yeah. And then Mr. Furley moved in. Holy fuck, was he something else. Mr. Furley. Oh, that. Mr. Furley. The weird, maybe. Yeah. And then Mr. Furley moved in. Holy fuck, was he something else. Mr. Furley. Oh, that... Mr. Furley. The weird, the skinny dude. Don Knotts.

Don Knotts. One of the greatest fucking characters ever created. His eyes are googly. Mr. Furley was awesome. So who did he want to bang? Mr. Furley didn't want to bang anybody. He was just, you know, he had those loud suits, and he thought he was sort of the man about town. We were talking about Too Close for Comfort, though.

Yeah, sorry. Oh, I can't remember his name. Monroe. Fucking Monroe was the gay guy on Too Close for Comfort. I'll look this up, man, because I don't fucking, I don't remember, I remember. Too Close for Comfort. It was set in San Francisco, and in the opening credits, they had the name, and they had a shot of raw houses in San Francisco, the little skinny houses going up the hill. All right, all right. Okay, it's coming back to me a bit.

And Ted Knight was the guy with the white hair, and he was the sort of father guy, and I think Monroe. Oh, that was the one where the- Oh, fuck, man. Yeah, okay. They had the dude. The houses are on the hill. Was that where the guy on the... Oh, fuck, man. Yeah, okay. They had the dude. The houses are on the hill. Was that where the guy on the big wheel would come down?

He had a little brake on it because the hills are so steep? No, that was Eight is Enough with Adam Rich. Oh, frick, man. I don't remember this. Yeah, I'm starting to... That was Eight is Enough with Adam Rich. Remember that little cocksucker? I remember Richie Rich.

Richie Rich wasn't a fucking TV show, though. It was a cartoon. Eight is enough. I used to watch Eight is Enough. Here we go. Sat in San Francisco, just like I said. Still not coming to me yet. I like the tune.

Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah, I remember that now. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it., yeah, there's Ted Knight. There's Ted Knight. He's a doctor? He was a fucking, he was a cartoonist. He's handsome. Right, I remember now. He was a cartoonist, and he had that little puppet. I remember her. Yeah? Yeah, I really remember her.

Remember her? Lydia Cornell. Yes. Yeah. Oh, that coach sucks. That was the dude, eh? Just, no? No.

Monroe's not on there yet. Oh, Jesus, maybe he wasn't no? No. Monroe's not on there yet. Oh, Jesus. Maybe he wasn't in that one. Maybe he came later. When the ratings started to crash, they probably said, let's add a gay guy. Maybe.

Okay. It helped out. I know all my fucking 70s and 80s sitcoms, bud. I'm actually amazed, man. That impressed me. All right. In 1928, happy birthday to Noam Chomsky, an American linguist.

What the frig is a linguist? Linguist. Linguist? I thought it was a linguist. Next, who gives a fuck? How about Noam Chomsky? Well, he founded something that says here, transformational grammar. Yeah, and where was he born?

Philly. What? Yeah. He was a philosopher, a political activist? A rookie. He's one of the most famous modern-day philosophers. I thought he was Canadian. He's got a cool name. No one's named Noam these days.

Know what I'm saying? Hey, Noam. Imagine if his last name was San. Ha ha. That's funnier than J-Rock. All right. 1932. Ellen Burst...

How's that? Bernstein? Burstin'. Burstin'. Ellen Burstin'. American actress. She was in the... Exorcist!

Oh, that movie scared the freak. I peed my pants. It's not good when you pee yourself in white pants, guys. It takes, you gotta use a little bit of extra detergent. Sometimes if you gotta use... So you've always worn white pants? White pants, they, white pants... The Exorcist would have come out when you were a fucking kid, Randy.

But the white pants are slimming and nice. But you gotta keep them clean. Slimming. And sometimes you don't want to use too much bleach, because you can ruin the fabric. It eats at them. But if you use a little extra... If you use hot water, hot water's good, but it might shrink it down. And that makes your package look sick. This is why I don't

bring him on here. You know what? I actually miss Ricky right now. This is why I don't bring him on. Who gives a fuck about... Who gives a fuck, Randy? how to wash your fucking pants, Randy. People care. People care. Nobody cares.

Nobody gives two fucks. You guys don't wear white. People out there wear white. White's coming back. I wear white pants every now and then. If I'm going

to a big event. Rock the white pants. Julian, maybe you should wear some white pants. No, I you should wear some white pants. No, I like my pants the way they are. I bet you. What's the next one?

You'd look good. 1942. Harry Chapin. American rock vocalist. Chapin. Oh. Harry Chapin. I thought there was an L in there.

No, you're thinking of Charlie Chaplin right now. Oh, Charlie Chaplin. He was funny. This is Harry Chapin. Harry Chapin? And the kite's in the cradle and the silver spoon. Little boy booing the man in the moon. When you're coming home, son,

I don't know when, but we'll get together then, son. You know, we'll have a good time then. Did you ever hear Ricky singing that song? No. It's fucking quite remarkable. What does he say? He just totally fucks the whole thing up. And he thinks he knows it word for word, man.

Ricky doesn't know any songs word for word. He knows maybe a line or two out of each song, and then he just, the rest of it doesn't compute. I've heard him sing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. He knows that whole one. Maybe. There was that Sesame Street one. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do Oh, and he also knows...

You know what's the... I bet you kids don't even watch fucking Sesame Street these days. Yes, they do. It's all iPads, man. No, they watch Sesame Street, but Sesame Street's a very different place now. They watch this shark one. It's a shark, shark, dee, dee, dee, dee.

All these friggin' things. Daddy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Daddy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. You spent two weeks singing that fuckin' song. Daddy shark.

They should do other ones, though, like flush the toilet, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, flush the toilet, because they don't. They just poop What they leave it floating. What is wrong with your fucking head, Randy?

Why do we want to think of a flush the toilet? Wash your hands, doot-doot-doot-doot, right? I heard a couple of kids on the street the other day singing, Cancer shark, doot-doot-doot-doot, cancer shark, doot-doot-doot-doot. What? I heard them sing cancer shark. Do they have it? Why?

Do they get cancer, too? Sharks don't get cancer. Do they have it? Why? Do they get cancer too? I don't know. Sharks don't get cancer. It's cause of their blood. Could be. Randy, you know a lot about shark blood, do you? What? I'm not sure. They're old. They're old, huh? They're old. What about baby sharks? Baby shark do do do do do. Baby shark do do do do do.

That's true. Who else do we got here? Gary Morris. Gary Morris. Country singer. Yeah. Born in Fort Worth, Texas. 1948. Holy cow.

1954, Julie Halston. An actress. Yeah. I don't know her either. I don't have cable. I don't know her either. I don't have cable. I don't know who she is, man. Priscilla Burns. Larry Bird.

The fucking Bird, man. He's an NBA star. 12-time. You know who Larry Bird is. Yeah, he's tall. Great big tall white bastard that played for Boston. Yeah. He seems like a cool guy.

He seems like a good guy, but I never really want, I never could get into basketball. Nah, I'm not really a big basketball fan either, man. I like the big three, though, Ice Cubes League. His new league where they just play three on three on one basket, that's pretty decent. But I could never get into basketball other than that. I shoot some hoops sometimes. Oh, I would go to an NBA game. I know you shoot hoops, Randy.

Not those types. I know you shoot hoops. What you're thinking, Bubbles. Frig off. All right, Rick Rude. American professional wrestler. I love wrestling. Yeah, Rick Rude.

He's not with us. 1999, he died. Yeah, he was a fucking dirty bastard, Rick Rude. He's not with us. 1999, he died. Yeah, he was a fucking dirty bastard, Rick Rude. Rude bastard, man. He was rude as fuck. Used to tell people to go fuck themselves because he was rude. Rick Rude. Who else have we got?

Who else you got, Randy? I was just thinking about checking oil. Andre was the guy that checked the oil first? Yes, he invented it. Except his thumb was about as big as that can. Boy. That would be checking it, wouldn't it? Oh, God.

So you just let me just... You just pictured that as his thumb and went, boy, all happy. pictured that as his thumb and went, boy, all happy. Would you let Andre the Giant check your oil in a wrestling match? No, I wouldn't, no, because that's not... What about in private after a few drinks? No. No?

No, he's not my type. What about Larry Bird? Well, he's tall. Would you like to see Larry's bird? Perhaps. Two big off guys. Shooting hoops with Larry's bird. Jeffrey Wright, he's in Westworld.

I like that show. Have you seen Westworld? Holy fuck, have you seen it? I haven't. It's decent. It's almost like, remember fucking Fantasy Island? Mm-hmm. With Mr. Rourke and Tattoo?

I like Tattoo. I like Tattoo, too. Hey, boss. Hervé Villachez was his name. And he was great. He was a great little actor. Hervé was. Mm-hmm.

Westworld, though. It's a new show. And it's like you pay money. Rich people pay money to go to an old west town. Yeah. And you can get in gunfights and shit, but you can't get hurt. But you can actually kill robots and stuff. And it gets really complicated and really awesome. They kill robots.

Well, there's no. I mean, these are AI. You can't tell who's human or who isn't. No way. And there's a whorehouse, and you go in there and you do your dirty stuff. No, there isn't. Yes. And it's with, you know, you can't tell if they're AI or not.

You see any... Yes, they've got all the parts. But they're robots. You can't tell, though, Randy. It doesn't matter, then. Cyborgs. They're not cyborgs. They're fucking AI robots, but you can't tell because they're physically exactly like humans. I thought a cyborg was robot human.

Yeah, this is not any human. This is a fucking robot. We're not talking about the bionic woman here, who was extremely odd back in the day. No. Yeah, but if they're not real, then how would they be real? Oh, my fuck.

There's a T-shirt waiting to get made. I'm just saying, you said that they're not really human, so how do the parts feel? How could you go bang a whore at the whorehouse if they're not? Because, Randy, they're man-made, but they figured out a way to make fucking flesh that feels like that. And there's also male whore, like man whores. There's male AIs there. There's man, female AIs.

Although not as popular in the Old West. The male whorehouse. No, you wouldn't. Where you'd go in, where gay guys would go in and hire a fella. Wasn't a big hit in the Old West for some reason. I think somebody tried it once. Billy the Kid

shot them, I think. Did he? Pretty sure. I don't know. That could be inaccurate. Anyway, it's a fucking good show, Westworld. Check it out. Check it out. 1977, Dominic Howard. Yeah, he's the drummer in Muse.

Yeah. Aaron Carter. 1987, Aaron Carter. Yeah, I just... Younger brother of one of the, what, Backstreet Boys? Nick Carter's younger brother, I believe. Yeah, he was saying he was basically like Justin Bieber or something. I saw something on TV the other night.

Yeah. Like he was the Justin Bieber of his time. He was not quite as big as the Biebs, let me tell you. That's what he was saying, man. He was not quite as big as the Biebs, let me tell you. That's what he was saying, man. I'm pretty sure he's, um... He got all cranked up on the drugs there for a while. Yeah, he was a little cranked up, wasn't he?

Yeah, Aaron Carter was a little cranked up on the drugs, but I think he straightened himself out. Good for you, man. Good for you, Aaron Carter. Good for you, Aaron Carter. I think he's got a new record coming out or something. That's good, man. Do they still call them records? I do.

Yeah? What do you call them? Um, it's true. I used to call them CDs. Well, nobody puts fucking CDs out anymore, Randy. Some people do. Eminem just put out a cassette. A cassette? Yeah, he put out a cassette. A cassette? Yeah.

He put out his new record, Kamikaze, which is fucking decent, by the way. He put out a limited edition vinyl and cassette package. All right. He should put out a little cassette player now. Eminem cassette player. He probably will. That's what I would do, man. Maybe we should do that.

And did you see what he did? He took out a full-page ad in, like, I don't know, Rolling Stone or one of the big magazines. He took out a full-page ad, and he fucking, he put up all the shitty reviews that the record got, and he put that right in the ad. Look, Eminem. I don't, what are you doing?

Unbelievable. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. I can't get over the stink coming off you, Randy. I wish people at home could. I'm not that bad today. You've gone stink blind, Randy. That's why. Your nose blind. You know those commercials where they show the big dumpster in the house or whatever?

In this case, if we filmed a commercial like that, it would be you sitting in your house surrounded by a 12-foot-wide York's meat pie. Yeah, holy fuck. This poor dude, man. I want one of those. You smell like a meat pie, Randy. Meat pies are good. Check out this poor fucker. Meat pies want one of those. You smell like a meat pie, Randy. Meat pies are good. Check out this poor fucker.

Meat pies got crust and meat. Randy, shut up. I'm trying to say something. So do you. This poor fucker, he's a missionary dude, right? Goes to this remote island to talk to this tribe that no one ever goes to this place because they're kind of protecting these guys.

Yeah, and they killed them. Yeah. So he had with him a football. He's like, here, guys, he's up in his kayak. Here, I got a football

and some coconuts or something. Yeah. I come in peace and they fucking boom. Yeah, they do. One arrow goes right through his Bible.

At that point, I would have been like, I'm the fuck out of here, guys. No, he fucked up. And he was like, football? What the fuck are a bunch of tribesmen going to do with a football? No, they probably thought it was like a fucking bomb or something.

They don't even know what bombs are. They don't know what footballs are either, bud. Exactly. They don't know nothing. They just think it's a, I don't know. A threat. A threat. Who is this asshole?

He should have made them some burgers, maybe. Like if he went up and had a little barbecue. I'd love to see you approach this tribe, Randy. They'd probably start bowing and praying because they think the fucking... If you had it on the kayak, like a little hibachi or one of those little thing going, and had the burger smell going, and they smelled the barbecue, they would be like, what the freak is that? That smells good.

They'd start bowing because they thought the god of fucking, the god of whatever just showed up. Food opens doors in our world. Well, coconuts didn't work. Maybe the burgers would work. Coconuts don't smell, but the smell of burgers cooking. These guys, of course, don't have, like, clothes on. They got little, some shit over their units and shit.

They probably, they might not even know about burgers. They might think you're a relative or something. It's weird. Why do they even cover up their units at that point? Yeah, it's like,

yeah, I don't know, man. Who told them to do that? And he should have had a music plan because if some music was going, they would have been like, yeah.

Oh, I'm sure, Randy. They roll, he rolls up there in a kayak with 50 Cent Blaring. That's going to put everybody through. No, it should be happy'm sure, Randy. He rolls up there in a kayak with 50 Cent Blaring. That's going to put everybody... No, it should be happy reggae, maybe. That might make them happier, but I don't know, man.

They're basically saying, you come on our island, we're fucking killing you. And the police, they were like, yeah, we're not going to investigate this. These people, you know, leave them alone. What are you going to do, arrest one of them? You're going to have to go in and have a fucking war with the whole tribe. Fuck that. They killed him. And they'd be dead.

The moral of the story is leave the people the fuck alone. But what about that movie where the guy went up and he took over and he became one of them, and then the Americans went up with riverboats and they had to go up. Pocalypse Now? Yeah. See, that guy fit in probably because he brought burgers.

It was also a fucking movie, Randy, you dumbass. Yeah, but it was based on the truth, wasn't it? He didn't bring the fucking tribal people burgers. It wasn't based on anything, Randy, you stupid bastard. Well, sometimes they say at the beginning of the movie this is based on a true story. We gotta go get Ricky out of jail. I can't handle this anymore.

Let's go get Ricky out of jail. Clean this fucking place up, Randy. It's gonna take forever. Don't eat all the chocolate bars. Save them those for Christmas. Alright, guys. See you later. You can eat all the chocolate bars, Randy.

Thanks. I will. Merry Christmas, bud. Deedle, deedle, deedle, deedle, deedle.