Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 174 - Back and Forth to the Future

Episode Date: December 17, 2018

The Boys are joined by Randy in Steel City for a debate about the present, the past, the future, time change and fucking with the Space Time Continuum. Brain sore yet? Episode 174 is brought to you by the official Trailer Park Boys Store, SwearNet.com (the only place to watch the video of this podcash), Liquormen's Ol' Dirty Canadian Whisky, Freedom 35 lager and (NEW!) Green Bastard IPA!

Welcome to the Trailer Perk Boys podcast, brought to you in perkboysswearingit.com, the only place where you can see the video version of this podcast. Nice one. And go to trailerperkboysmerch.com and check out some merch, buy some stuff, please. They sponsor us too. What about the beer and the liquor? I was just getting to that, Richard. Also sponsored by Freedom 35, Drink the Dream, and Leckerman's all-dirty Canadian whiskey.

And a new beer is born. Try my new Ricky's Catch-23 malt liquor. It's stronger than you are. Why the fuck do I get stuck with this dickhead next to me? Because I need this little stand. Well, it's not fair, man. I'm stuck with him next to me, too. You invited him, Bubz. You should be sitting right where I am, and he should be sitting right here. But I have the official, you know, this is where all the staff magic happens.

Well, what the fuck is this thing I have in my lap? It's a laptop. It's got valuable information for this podcast. Well, I guess you fucked up then, didn't you? All right, do you want to get this started or what? No. No, let's a laptop. It's got valuable information for this podcast. Well, I guess you fucked up then, didn't you? All right, do you want to get this started or what? No. No, let's just not do it. All right, you know what? I'm not. I'm not fucking starting it.

Have fun, boys. Just start it then. Welcome, everybody, to podcast number... 174. 174. My name's Randy. I'm the most handsome guy here. I showered today. It's a podcast, not a podcast, dumbass.

Bullshit, you showered today. I showered and I used a new hair product in my hair. That's why my hair looks so nice. Smells like you showered with a bag of shit. You need to shower again. It's lavender. Lavender? Lavender.

Lavender doesn't smell like fucking feces randy you just swore i'm allowed to fucking swear it's not nice to you okay we're gonna tell everybody where we are are we gonna talk about showering and shit we're in fucking pittsburgh right now everybody steel city and now, this is being taped, and when you're watching it, it's actually December 14th when really it's, what's the date today? I don't know. The 6th. Before that.

December 4th. It's the 4th of December. So we're kind of. Hold on a minute. So what day is it? It is December 4th right now, but when people are watching it, it's Friday. We're filming on the 14th.

Exactly. So it, it's Friday. But we're filming on the 14th. Exactly. So it's... Time change. So we're back in time right now or we're going to be in the future on the 14th? This is too fucking hard for my head to fucking... What are you talking about, Ricky? Well, how are we...

How is it two days at once? Ten days apart? Right now, today is December 4th. Right. But when this airs, we're in December 14th. So right now, it's like we're in December 14th, though. We're paused. We're pretending, kind of.

But we can't do that. Because then you don't know anything could happen, right? There's too many factors. What do you mean, anything could happen, right? There's too many factors. What do you mean, anything could happen? Oh, by the time we go back to the future, on the 14th, or ahead of the future, we could be in jail. We may not get out of the country. Yeah, but this will still air,

because... So you mean the space-time continuum could get disrupted? I don't know. I just don't like it. And I'd rather go back to the past. So what do you want us to do about this, Ricky? Do you want to fucking air it right now, December 4th? What do you mean go back to the past? Go back to when?

To the day that we're supposed to have shot this. It's right now. The past. No, the past. It's not the past. It's the present. Well, let's stay in the past and fuck on to the future. It's what it is.

It's not the 14th. But it is. This can't air until the 14th, Ricky. But we don't know what's gonna happen that day. True, but you don't know what's gonna happen five minutes from now. You could walk out the door and get hit by a laundry cart. At least it would be the present. Or the past. Or the right day.

Why does this have to be so fucking confusing, man? Because that's how his brain works. But you know what? It is true. We could end it. We could be the last day of tour. We could fuck up, go to jail, not get home,

and we could be still here or somewhere else in America by the 14th. Which might be cool. Yes. We haven't spent Christmas in jail in a while. We should this year. Just for old times' sake. No, we should not. You should not, and I definitely should not. I'm not freaking going to jail for Christmas. If we're going to go, we should this year. Just for old times' sake. No, we should not. You should not, and I definitely should not.

I'm not freaking going to jail for Christmas. If we're going to go, we should get there before Christmas, because the best parties are usually like two days before Christmas. Okay, if we do go to jail, I mean, the last two shows are in Portland, Maine, and then the last one's Boston. I think if I was to go to one of those jails, I'd rather go to the Portland one. Yeah, I've been to jail. I've been to jail in Maine.

It's not that bad. It's actually pretty good. The food's fucking great, actually. If we're going to go to jail,'d rather go to the Portland one. Yeah, I've been to jail. I've been to jail in Maine. It's not that bad. It's actually pretty good. Food's fucking great, actually. If we're going to go to jail, let's go to the Portland one. Oh, it's fantastic food. So when are we in Portland? We're in Portland next week, so this is a whole other time. On December 8th, we play in Portland.

So we could be in jail December 8th. Right, but this is the 14th. We're not going to fucking jail. So we should say, if we did, if we didn't, how do we find out? Well, the only way we could do that is to make a plan to actually fuck up and go to jail on the 8th, Ricky. How do we find out, Ricky? What are you talking about?

We need to know this shit. If this is going to air, we need to know what the fuck happens on the day or the day before, you know? But we can't figure, we can't look into the future. We're not in the future right now, Ricky. Look it up online or something. Look it, you can't look things up. Yes you can.

You can look up movies coming out and stuff. What's the, hey Siri, what's gonna happen next week? You have a couple of appointments. I got a couple of appointments. That's about the only thing that I have going on in the future. I'm going to make some cheeseburgers. Well, I hope this just doesn't turn into a great big lie. That's all I'm worried about.

It's like, hey, this is what we think might happen, but it didn't. But, Ricky, okay. There could be all kinds of crazy shit happen in the world that we should be talking about. We don't know. We don't know, boys. Oh, you're right. We don't know. But, Ricky, okay, look, if you say,

I'm going to fucking play hockey next Thursday, do you ever say a sentence like that? I wouldn't like to because you don't know if you're going to. All right. You could say I'm supposed to play hockey next Thursday, but I may not. That's what the problem is. Well, could you say I've got a doctor's appointment next Thursday.

Could you say that? You probably could say that. Okay, so all we're really saying is we have an appointment to air this podcast. Next Friday. Next Friday. We have an appointment to do that.

All right. But the stuff we talk about right now is going to be in that. Right. So is that the part you have an issue with? I just, I don't know. There's too much things that we don't know. I'll do it.

I'll fucking do it, but I'm not happy about it. Okay, so what should we talk about then? I think talking about this is fantastic. I know, but it's getting, we're like talking in circles here, boys. Well, because you guys can't explain it to me properly. My brain doesn't make it work. You don't have a brain. Do you fucking understand this?

I get it totally. Okay, you explain it. You don't get it. Randy's views on this. We're just doing work in advance that comes out later. I get that, but what if it's not true, any of it? What if everything we talked about today gets changed? Walk out of here and a big safe drops on us and tells us all.

Then they'll say, how the fuck are they showing this? They're dead. Yeah, but they'll be like, people will understand that we shot it before we were dead, Ricky. Okay. Just, I'm not used to doing it like this. It's not honest, but sure, let's do it. Fuck it. It's as honest as it's gonna get ricky okay

without being a fucking portentoso so rick you know when you see like oh my god you know when you go to the movies yeah when do you think that movie was shot like the day before or the day of you seeing it no but that stuff's more pretend this is is real, right? Yeah, I guess. You know what? I'm just going to try to stop thinking about it because it's really hurting my brain. I'll get it. You have a sore brain now?

My brain is sore as well. When you think too much, doesn't your brain get sore? Well, you shouldn't have to think this hard when you're on a fucking tour, okay? Your brain should not get sore, Ricky, no, because there's no moving parts. Well, hangovers, headaches. But that's not from thinking, Ricky, no, because there's no moving parts. Well, hangovers. Headaches.

But that's not from thinking, Randy. That's from drinking. Yeah, but Ricky's different. My brain just, I think it works harder than your guys' brains, because it doesn't have as easy of a time. There's just not enough information to grab from. Well, you mean it's overheating. It could be, I don't know. The CPU's overclocked. There's just not enough information to grab from. You mean it's overheating? Could be.

It's overheating. The CPU's overclocked. Your brain's like, say you're trying to think of something. Your brain just goes, oh, here it is. And then you spit it out. My brain is like, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot. So we have like... Trying to find it.

Yeah, you're overclocked. This is what it's like. We've got like a V8 brain, right? Yeah. You've got like a fucking one of those European two-cylinder brains. I need a turbocharger or something. You should drink more water. You need to get stroked out, man.

He's got a one-stroke. Water's good for your brain. You've got to stroke out your brain. Yeah. Water will make it go quicker. All right, so what's going to be talking about? See? What?

What's going to? You're fucking using it too much, man. What's gonna be done? Stop thinking. I gotta stop thinking. Stop thinking. What's gonna be done? Shut the fuck up.

I'm gonna have a meltdown, boys. What the fuck did we smoke? I'm hungover and high in Pittsburgh, and I'm not happy. Oh, so. I'm happy, but I'm not happy. Here's another thing. It's a different day than it's supposed to be. Here's another thing that we gotta tell people day than it's supposed to be. Here's another thing that we got to tell people.

Okay. Tonight, we're in Pittsburgh. No, not true. Okay, we have an appointment tonight. Yeah. Tonight we're going to Pittsburgh versus Colorado. Are we, though? To see Sidney Crosby.

Are we, though? Play against Nathan McKinnon. But we're not, because that game would have already happened. No, but Ricky, but we are doing that tonight in the world of reality. Who won? We don't know yet, because the game didn't happen. But we should know. Yes, we should.

On this podcast, we should be able to say, hey, we went to the game. And this happened and that happened. Wow, was it ever fucking cool. You guys should have been there. I get where you're coming from, Ricky, but you don't have to do it like that. You don't have to overheat your brain. Do I get to go?

So we're going to the game tonight, a.k.a. went to the game 10 days ago, and it was awesome. It's going to be awesome. Fuck, it was awesome. And a lot of people don't know this, but Sidney Crosby and Nathan McKinnon, they both lived, like, right down the street from fucking Sunnyvale. That's right.

That is a fact. You can Google it. That is cool. So how did they get so fucking successful and we just were fucked? Well, they didn't do drugs all right they didn't get into crime they worked hard they didn't steal and they practiced and actually tried their best to get where they're at and they did it have they ever been to jail nope even like the drunk tank i guarantee you neither one of them have been to the drunk tank.

What are the chances that we're all in Pittsburgh on the same night? That's fucked. And we have a day off. That's pretty deep. It's a pretty good coincidence that those two are playing each other on our day off and we're in Pittsburgh. I'll give you that recognition. And they are fucking gracious.

They gave us fucking tickets. Gracious? Gracious. Where did you come up with that word? Where did you pull that word out of? My brain stopped for a minute, and then it's all of a sudden, boom! Here's a big word you can use, bud. You didn't even think about it.

Did your brain call you bud? All the time. We get along great. Once in a while we fight, but lately things have been clicking between us. Can you imagine getting into a fight with your brain? So your brain calls you bud? Sometimes, if it's in a while we fight, but lately things have been clicking between us. Imagine getting into a fight with your brain. So your brain calls you bud. Sometimes, if it's in a good mood. I get pissed off at my brain.

When I can't come up with something, I'm like, you fucking dick. And then he's like, chill, bud. So is your brain doing shit like that on purpose, you think? Just to piss you off? It is. It's like, you know what? Chill out or I'm not going to give you anything from now on. You'll have nothing. You won't be able to talk.

So your brain threatens you. All the time. It's an asshole when it threats like that. It threatens to make your brain dead. Lately things have been good between us. So your brain is... he's separate from you. He's an independent... He's an independent player. Isn't anybody's? Or everybody's?

I don't know. I don't fucking know much about it. Well, your brain is you, Ricky. Your brain shouldn't be calling you by it. Maybe it's one side of his brain is different than the other. Yeah, it could be, Randy. You fucking idiot. They're split.

They do different things. Yeah, your left hemisphere and your right hemisphere. There's a female side and a male side. No. There's something to that. That's plugs. There's an artistic side and a scientific side. Which one am I?

And I happen to have both working in fucking perfect sync. Just firing on all cylinders at all times. I should have been... Yeah, I could have had the science brain. I just never trained it properly. You don't drink enough water. You could have had the science brain if Ray hadn't been your dad. And if you, you know, if you went to school, Ricky,

and, you know, didn't fire your fucking bucks into the river when we were in elementary school, that would have helped. So do you think right now if he applied himself at his age and we helped him out every day with fucking school work and shit, do you think he could fucking be a better person? Smarter? Who? Oh,

marginally. Or is there a point where you're just, you're a lost cause? Marginally, but it's like taking a piece of fucking clay, you know, when it's fresh and it's all wet and you can mold it, and then picture it just baked in the oven, hard as a rock wet and you can mold it and then picture it just baked in the oven hard as a rock and you're trying to fucking mold it just chips away it just chips away his his brain is baked solid yeah are we talking about me guys your brain your brain just your brain not you

ricky your buddy anyway i mean the old man told me that basically when you get born, that the big guy or the big person could be a woman. They pick what you do. And I got picked to not really do anything my whole life, which is kind of cool. Who's the big guy? Like God? Yeah. God picked you not to do anything. To just be like a loser that goes to jail. He said you're going to be just like your old man.

And I'm fine with that, because he's awesome. Yeah, you imagine now if Ray hadn't have fucking instilled that in Ricky. You're destined to be a loser, son. I think I've done pretty fucking good with myself. Look where I am. I'm in Pittsburgh.

That's, hey, I'm not... You're right here with me, so I mean I'm doing the same as you. Small town boy done good, eh? That's what they say. Just a small town boy living in a small town. So what are we going to talk about on this fine day? I don't know.

We were thanking Sidney Crosby. Yeah, thank you. Do I get to go to the game? Thank you, Sid. Thank you, Nate. Fucking awesome. Randy, you're coming to the game, Thank you, Sid. Thank you, Nate. Fucking awesome. Randy, you're coming to the game, but you're putting a fucking shirt on. I'm not wearing a freaking shirt to the game.

You've got to wear a jersey. You can't go. You can't go. Why? Because he's going to get a rush, man. That's right. Okay, then fuck you. You're not going.

I'll go, but maybe I'll put it in the back. What? We could scalp his fucking ticket. We're not scalping tickets that Sidney Crosby gave me because he gave them to me. He should know what we're like, man. He gave them to me because he knows I'm basically responsible for his skills.

He studied me when he was younger. But if his tickets are good tickets, we could scalp those tickets and get shittier tickets. We're not scalping the tickets that Sidney Crosby gets us. You know what? We could walk out of that hockey game with fucking, I'd bet, five grand. Probably we could, but we're not. All we have to do is find

the right people, give them our clothes, say, you have to go sit in these seats. We'll take your shitty seats. So you don't want to see the game. You just want the money. No, no. I want to see the game. We just have shittier seats like way up in the nosebleeds. And what clothes are we wearing? Are we naked in the arena?

We could buy some clothes. Hopefully your clothes would fit us. But if we buy clothes, then we're probably not anywhere ahead because we just spent the profit we made on clothes we don't like. Bob, so you're talking five grand minus 500 bucks in clothes, which is a lot. That's fucking a lot of money in clothes for four people, three people. You're going to have to give up your money.

Or here's another idea. Just take the fucking tickets that he gave us and go and enjoy the fucking game like we're supposed to. I don't know if I... You know what? I don't know if I can enjoy the game as much now knowing that I could have got like five grand

at the end of the night and still did the whole fucking thing. But, you know, we could even buy binoculars for you, man. Yep. Brand new. It's got nothing to do with that. I can see the game just fine from all areas of the arena. Well, you won't be able to if we have to give your glasses to the person that we sell our seats to. I'm not giving those to anybody.

You can keep the glasses. The tickets that Sidney Crosby got us were sitting right at the glass. We're gonna be on the TV and everything. Really? Seriously? Yes, so we're not fucking around. I don't care about that. I care about... We're sitting right at the glass. We're going to be on the TV. Really? Seriously? Yes. So we're not fucking around. I don't care about that.

I care about... They're worth more than five grand at the glass. Okay, what about the passes for afterwards? Yes, we're going in the dressing room, and you're not coming in there because hockey players walk around with their cocks swinging. I've seen cocks. You're not coming in the dressing room, Randy. You're not coming in the dressing room. I. You're not coming in the dressing room.

I'm telling you right now, you'll be giggling over in the corner. Can we at least sell his back fucking locker room pass? No, I get that money for cheeseburgers. No, we'll hand those back to Sidney and say, we didn't need these all. Sorry we brought a strange family with us who paid us $1,000. If he's coming to the game, can we at least charge him $250 for the ticket?

Yes. Yes, you can pay for the beers. we at least charge him $250 for the ticket? Yes. Yes, you can pay for the beers. I'm not. You're paying for the beers. If you're getting them for free, I should get to go. Well, there's a...

We got some for free. There's a handling fee, Randy. I mean, I... One of them was expensive. It took me a lot of work to get these tickets from. So you're buying all the food tonight as well?

Popcorn, hot dogs? Yes. Well, I can't afford that. Thank you. Well, you're going to the food tonight as well? Popcorn, hot dogs? Yes. Well, I can't afford that. Thank you. Well, you're going to have to get out there and hit the drive-thru, buddy, and start fucking hooking up yourself for burgers and stuff. Whatever. I bet you can suck yourself to the game.

Yeah. Maybe I should just freaking call Sidney Crosby and see if he'll get me. Yeah, you do that. You do that. You call Sidney Crosby. Get a hold of get me my own. Yeah, you do that. You do that. You call Sidney Crosby. Get a hold of him. Go for it. We challenge you to do that.

I'll tell him I'll make him some cheeseburgers in the dressing room after the show. He doesn't even know who the fuck you are. They got barbecues down there. They don't fucking eat cheeseburgers. They got barbecues and deep fryers. Who does? The Pittsburgh, the team has them right in the dressing room. The team fucking has a grill in the dressing room.

And deep fat fryers. Those guys aren't eating that shit. I'm sure they do. Andy, you're out of your mind maybe a maybe a cricket team they don't even eat food everything they eat is okay so everything's set up astronaut food they don't they eat food greek yeah but special food for no they just eat healthy food they don't eat chemical science anymore i think it's just like a big like a square something that just has everything in there that you need.

Hockey players just eat a protein log, do they? A little patty. It's not just protein. It's got everything in it to make you a superstar. Boys, you know what? I think it's awful as shit. You've seen that in a movie or something. A cartoon probably. That cereal that makes you win. They eat Wheaties? A cartoon, probably. That's cereal that makes you win.

They don't eat Cocoa Puffs. No, they don't eat Cocoa Puffs. I bet you they fucking eat Fruit Loops and Cocoa Puffs and all that other shit. No, they don't. Yes, they do, man. Not allowed. Not allowed.

You got people watching over them. Big Eye in the Sky. Oh, the Big Eye in the Sky's watching. You're getting paid $100 million to play hockey? Somebody's telling you what the fuck you can and can't eat. I hate to tell you. I'm guaranteeing you these guys are getting drunk every fucking night of the week, and they're eating whatever the fuck they want.

They're eating pizzas at 3 o'clock in the morning, drunk. Well, then why do they all look like Adonis? Because they train hard. You can still train hard. If you get up and do that, you can eat whatever you want. All right. As you suck down your liquor drink. What do you guys want can eat whatever you want. All right. As you suck down your liquor drink. What do you guys want to talk about?

I don't know. I'm trying to fucking figure out some ways to make some money here. We can't really talk about who got born because what day is it? We don't know. Oh, Jesus. Somebody could get born between now and then. We don't even know about it. Well, yeah, they could. I guarantee you somebody will get born between now and then We don't even know about it Well, yeah, they could

I guarantee you somebody will get born So do we talk about people that got born today or in the future? We're going to talk the 14th We're pretending this is the 14th of December I would like to see you sit down with somebody like Stephen Hawking And talk about string theory fucking Oh my god It might just take something like that

to really get this thing fucking working right here. No, it might take something like that to make that thing blow right out of the top of your head. I don't know. I bet I could blow his up. Well, he's not alive, Ricky. Oh, there you go. So who's smarter than who right now? Yeah, you're smarter than Stephen Hawking right now.

That is a true statement. He was one of the smartest. He's not even alive anymore. What are you talking about? That's what I mean. That's why he said he's smarter than him right now, because he's not alive. I saw the movie.

The movie was good. Shut the fuck up, Randy. We don't care. He was a smart fucking man. I bet you his remains are smarter than you, Ricky. Could be. If there's still any molecule of him percolating. man. I bet you his remains are smarter than you, Ricky. Could be. They're still hooked up to something. If there's still any molecule

of him percolating, it's smarter than you. He knows how to control magical beasts, too. What? I saw the movies. Who does? I saw the movie with Stephen Hawking, and he was also controlling beasts.

I don't think that was the same movie. It was the fucking actor, you dumbass, that was playing Hawkins and this other fucking guy in that other movie. Who was he talking about? He's talking about that Rawlings movie, whatever the fuck her name is. J.K. Rawlings, is it?

Harry Potter. Harry Potter? Well, there's another one, the Beast one. Fantastic Beasts? Yeah. He was the same guy that was in that fucking movie. That wasn't Stephen Hawking, that was an actor. It was an actor, that's what I'm trying to say. Who the fuck ended up getting his brain?

I'd be lucky. That's what I should have applied for. Nobody got his brain. You should have, it's a fucking great brain. Organ donor. Yeah, but he died, Ricky. What does that mean? It means his brain ceased to function. I thought...

Can you imagine if he did have his brain in him right now? Oh, my God. If you could pop that in there for a day... Shit, I'd be spitting out. You guys would be like, slow down, bud. Quantum physics and string theory. Here's how you build a rocket. Stephen Hawking wasn build a rocket.

Stephen Hawking wasn't a rocket builder, but he could probably figure it out pretty quick. Here's how the Earth got made. He was very knowledgeable about things like that. Very knowledgeable. This is kind of fun, guys. This is a really shitty fucking time. Well, I'm having kind of a good time. I'm having kind of fun.

Yeah. All right, bubs. You know there's such a thing as pet psychics now? What does that mean? Pet psychics, man. They could fucking... Like you read a pet's mind? Yeah.

Dead ones, live ones, all of them, man. And these people are getting... Or the pet reads your mind. $100 for a 30 fucking minute session. So... But hold on a second.

Let's get on board that train. Does the pet read your mind and do you read the pet's mind? No, you read the mind. Say,

and this could be Bubbles. It's not a pet psychic. It's not your pet is a psychic who can read minds. That's what I think he said. No, it's a pet psychic claims she can communicate with animals.

It's a psychic who can talk to pets. And Bubs, I think... Aquaman can. That's bullshit. I think you could pull this off if you tried hard enough. But they're Julian. You know it's not real, right? Bubs, it's $100.

It's $200 an hour. I know, but they're just charlatans. That's all they are. How do you learn how to speak? How do you learn how to bark and meow, though, or whatever the animal is? How do you talk? Apparently the thing thinks in English, does it?

It thinks in English. Yeah, okay. Or whatever kind of thing. I don't know, man. Fortunetellers can all collectively take a big hydraulic sock on my nuts. There's good ones that do. I could do that as a good scam.

Right now your dog's saying, which means he's lonely. You don't feed him enough. They do that. Dogs do have feelings, man. Big time. Correct. I'm not saying they don't.

I'm saying the people that communicate with the dead ones are full of shit. I don't know, man. I've been watching some TV shows, and they're pretty legit shit. Oh, what, like Long Island Medium? No, no, no. That dude, the Tyler Henry dude? Well, you got a hate on him. I don't like psychics,

because I think they're just ripping people off, and they're capitalizing on their grief and making money off them. Oh, guess what? I'm talking to your dead husband, and he messaged you, and I give him a fucking 500 bucks. Well, what is wrong with that? What is wrong with it?

They should do it for free. Right. Not if you can make money, man. They got to eat, too. Why do you believe in that shit so much, Julian? Because I've watched it, man. I've seen it happen. I've been part of it.

Yeah, you had that fucking psychic tell you you were going to die, and how many years ago was that? Well, I am going to die. Yeah've seen it happen. I've been part of it. Yeah, you had that fucking psychic tell you you were going to die. How many years ago was that? Well, I am going to die. Yeah, fuck. Who knows when? Oh, wow. There's a fucking... Here, I'll make a prediction.

You're going to take a shit in the next couple days. Wow. I'm a fucking psychic. No, man. That's just... That's elf. That's elf. I'm a psychic.

I bet you you will take a piss today. No, you're just... You know what? I'm a psychic. I bet you you will take a piss today. No, you're just, you know what? I'm a psychic, boys. I bet you're going to have a drink today and smoke a joint. I bet you I'm going to have a cheeseburger. I bet you you're going to fuck off, too, Randy, any time now. I bet you Randy's going to fuck off and piss everyone off. Oh, my God, I'm a psychic.

I nailed it. Boom. Happened. Yeah, it happened quick, too. I don't like fucking. I nailed it. Boom. Happened. Yeah, it happened quick, too. I don't like fucking... I can see into the future, people. Well, open your mind up, buddy. You know what's weird?

You know what's fucking weird? Nostradamus was born today. See the abominable snowman? Nostradamus wasn't the abominable snowman. Was he like Plato? Is he the guy they found on the ice? Plato. Is he a similar type person?

What are you talking about, Ricky? I thought it was... The Abominable Snowman's name was not Nostradamus. What was he? He was a scientist? Some kind of a beast, wasn't he? Nostradamus was a fucking... He was a...

See into the future guy. He wasn't a woolly mammoth? No, he was a human. No, that was... I thought he was one of the knights or something. Nosferatu? Is that who you're thinking of? Could be.

He was a... So Nostradamus? Nostradamus is when you get a cut in your nose and it grows a scab and then it collects bugs. That's a Nostradamus. That's what it's named after. I know another guy named Socrates. It socrates randy's you dumbass so he does the same thing as what was this guy really i swear to fuck nostradamus yeah he told a bunch of made a bunch of predictions

that came true so he we need him today it's like star trek if he was here today he'd be able to tell us what the fuck is supposed to be happening on December 14th. You know what's going to happen in the next 10 seconds? Nope. I'm leaving and going to a bar and I'm going to start my little journey on getting drunk tonight for the game. That is what's going to happen. 10. Little journey?

9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4. 3. 2.

1. But. Later. Lame. But later. Lame. Lame. I kind of want to have some drinks. I'd have some drinks. I need to smoke some.

I need some fucking food, which you're paying for. Okay, so tune in next week where we'll do another podcast if we're not already dead before this one airs. Don't say that. And hopefully we'll fucking know what's happening on that next one. I don't think I'm going to be in the next podcast. No, you're not.

Look how ominous this is, boys. Hopefully we're not dead. Frig off. Now we're going to be dead. Say stuff like that. I just like taunting the gods. Now we're going gonna be dead. To eat stuff like that. I just like taunting the gods. Now we're gonna be dead.