Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 175 - It’s Cruise Time, Baby!

Episode Date: December 24, 2018

The Boys are back from tour and ready to set sail. One question though - can one big party boat float? Guess who's bringing a life jacket!! Episode 175 is brought to you by the official Trailer Park Boys Store, SwearNet.com (the only place to watch the video of this podcash), Liquormen's Ol' Dirty Canadian Whisky, Freedom 35 lager and Green Bastard IPA!

Welcome to the Trailer Perk Boys podcast, brought to you in perkboysswearingit.com, the only place where you can see the video version of this podcast. Nice one. And go to trailerperkboysmerch.com and check out some merch, buy some stuff, please. They sponsor us too. What about the beer and the liquor? I was just getting to that, Richard. Also sponsored by Freedom 35, Drink the Dream, and Leckerman's all-dirty Canadian whiskey.

And a new beer is born. Try my new Rickey's Catch-23 malt liquor. It's stronger than you are. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Oh, man. Four fucking days away. Everywhere you go. Even here is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Well, yeah, it's coming together, huh? You started doing some decorating, did you?

Started? Ricky, I've been fucking working on decorations all week. Okay, boys. Let's get the Christmas liquor flowing. Good. How's it going, bud? Ready? Pick the one.

Oh, man. Nice. Oh. How's it going, bud? Ready? Pick the one. Oh, baby. Jesus. Oh, she's a good vintage. It's been a while, bud. Lots to talk about today. All right, want me to get it started? What the fuck's going on, motherfuckers? This is official Triller Prep Boys podcast coming at you.

This is podcast number 175. It's the 21st of fucking December. Nuts. Santa comes in four fucking days. Thank God. He's such a dick. Santa is a dick. Fuck Santa.

Jesus, man. Yeah. All right. No, you know what I mean. Well. Back from tour. Back from tour. Tour was fucking awesome.

It was awesome. Pretty tired, though, boys. I'm fucking tired. Met a ton of fans. Met a ton of our super fans. Yeah. All the super fans. All the regular fans. All the on the of fans. Met a ton of our super fans. Yeah. All the super fans, all the regular fans, all the on-the-fence fans, they were all out.

Even the haters came out. Some of the haters came out. Some of the haters came out and got turned into non-haters. Got to go to the Penn's-Ivalanche game. Yeah. Sidney Crosby. Had a picture with Sidney Crosby that went fucking viral. And Nathan McKinnon.

He was there, too, but I just mean the picture with... And Hanson. Hanson, brother. Two of the nicest guys in the world. Dave. Nathan and Sid. Yeah. Thanks to Sidney Crosby for walking us up with ten fucking tickets.

And passes. Very generous. Insane energy. Generous. And it was an awesome game, too. Oh, man. You disappeared for a while. Did I?

Yeah. You were gone for a while, Ricky. I've been known to do stuff like that. You went to the bathroom and it took you about 45 minutes and then you came back high as a kite, so I don't know what happened in that. No comment.

Yeah. What keeps ganging over here? It's my fucking laptop, man. Well, turn the cocksucker down. It's turned down. Got to hang out with Christian Hansen and his dad. Dave. Yeah.

One of the Hansen brothers. That's pretty cool. The guys that went out and beat the fuck out of people on the ice. Bobby Farrell. You were hanging out the Hanson brothers. That's pretty cool. Not the singers, the guys that went out and beat the fuck out of people on the ice. Bobby Fairley. You were hanging out with Hanson, the band? No, man. I said the fucking guy from the Chiefs, man.

You're dating one of the guys from Hanson. See, now you're being a dick. Bobby Fairley? Yeah, came by himself to the show. No, he didn't. He came with ten fellas. Bobby Fairley, who's been up to do trailer park boy shit. Perhaps you've heard of him.

He's made some of the greatest comedies in the history of the fucking human race. True that. One of the funniest people I've ever met. He was at the show in Boston. He was at the show. Something About Mary. If you don't know who he is. Something About Mary.

Dumb and Dumber. Yep. Me, myself, and Irene. One of my faves of theirs. That was awesome. Anyway, who else? It was a great fucking tour. It was a good tour.

It was a good tour. You, uh, so I noticed you have a glass here. Yeah. That this is your dad's glass? Uh, yeah. Well, yeah. Because I noticed on tour you were auctioning this off. I sold a few of them, yeah.

But every night you were saying, this is my dad's glass that he left. When I was under, I lived under the trailers, you know. It's a little greasy. Back when I was six or seven, there was a stockpile of booze and glasses. I think the old man got them from a bar or something. So they were all his fucking glasses, and he drank out of all of them. So I've got a few. I'm down to, like, hardly any, though.

So that was the last tour until the cruise. The cruise. I'm getting excited about the cruise, baby. That might be our only thing next year until Christmas. Could be. Could be. Who knows? I'm a little still trying to wrap my head around it, though.

Around what? It's a cruise. I know, but what does that mean exactly? I've never done anything like this. You don't know what a cruise is and you agreed to go on one? I know it's a boat and you just cruise around. Yeah, I cruise around. So what else do you need to know?

Well, it sounds like there's a lot of people going. There's multiple boats? No, it's one big boat that takes a few thousand people on it. Yeah, okay. Ricky, it's like, boats are huge, man. Is it like a container ship? No, Ricky, it's like a floating city almost. They don't make a boat like that anymore.

Not after the Titanic fucking went down. Ricky, the Titanic was a fucking fraction of the size of the fucking cruise ships today. Bullshit. How the fuck would it float? It can float, man. It can float. They know it's called engineering, Ricky. Just because something's big doesn't mean it sinks. I mean, they make boats out of fucking concrete, man. Concrete boats can float.

Yeah, okay. It's called buoyancy. It's physics. They know what they're doing, and they build the fucking things. Right. Ricky, the biggest cruise ship in the world, there's a pair of sister boats called the Oasis and the Allure, both of which I've seen with my own two eyes.

Mm-hmm. I think one of them, they fit like 6,000 people on them. I'm not buying it. There's a hockey rink, a fucking theater, a bank, a fucking IMAX theater. There's a hockey rink on this boat that we're going on? There's no hockey rink on the one we're taking, but it's a beautiful boat. It must be like an optical illusion, though, or something. An optical?

We're not selling tickets. No, I mean the big boat. It can't be that big and float. Unless it has wheels that extend from the bottom of it to go right to the bottom of the ocean. And that's what keeps it afloat. No, man. It's a fucking boat. You'd think the boat has legs with wheels on it.

They'd have to be adjustable for whatever deep the water was. So the boat's like a 1950s robot. I don't know. Maybe that's how they're so stable. No, Ricky. Hmm. So the boat's like a 1950s robot. I don't know. That's how they... Maybe that's how they're so stable. No, Ricky, it's a fucking boat. No, it's a boat.

It works just like a small boat, except it's a big boat. What you're describing, I don't know how it could possibly float. It's like saying... Just because you don't know... The hotel could float. Let's just chop the hotel off

its fucking foundation and center it and float. No, but that's a building. That's not built. That's a boat. He said they make boats out of concrete. Rick, do you ever watch the fucking show The Love Boat? Remember that show?

Somewhat. That was on a boat. The whole show took place on a fucking boat. Well, it actually was filmed in a fucking studio. Right. Fake. I know. Just like Gilligan's Island. Why'd you have to fucking say that?

I'm trying to prove a point. Well, I'd like to be factual. Gilligan's Island wasn't filmed on a fucking island either. Although I've been to the island that they use in the opening credits. It's in the Bahamas. I set foot on the cocksucker. Are you serious? Yep.

That's pretty cool. You're lucky you got back on. The lagoon is not part of that. I've been on that island, though. And there was people arguing with me me that's where they filmed the show and I was like incorrect you could not make a TV show on this island in the middle of the fucking ocean

in the Bahamas back then now you probably could oh you could but I mean you'd need an army of boats offshore to house all the stuff I mean the fucking island's not very big just like the Survivor show oh Gilligan's Island is fucking tiny by the one they show the aerial of.

Will you guys go ahead and get on that boat? I'm going to get on my own boat. No. I'll come to the big boat when I'm needed. But other than that, I want to be on a small boat that I know floats. Well, Ricky, if the fucking boat is there and we're getting on it, it's floated. Where are you going to get a smaller boat that you're going to drive behind it? I'd just like to take a nice fishing boat or something.

Why? Because it floats. It's safe. Cruise ships are very safe. There's only... I've heard bad stuff sometimes happens on them. People go missing. There's been some fucking problems.

People go missing because they get too fucked up and they fall overboard or they get murdered. Me. He's kind of got a point there, folks. You're going to have to wear a lifejacket the whole time with a GPS locator. I'm fine with that. All right. Come on, Ricky.

You can't get on a fishing boat behind the cruise ship. Well, then I could still take all my smokables, edibles, my handgun. The thing is, we've got to do shows on the cruise ship. Well, then I could still take all my smokables, edibles, my handgun. The thing is, we've got to do shows on the fucking boat. Just get the crane to pick me off my little boat and bring me over. Why are you making this so fucking difficult, man? There's not cranes available

to us on a cruise ship. How big is this theater, anyway? Do they have a helicopter? It holds a fucking lot of people. 900,000 people? 900 holds a fucking lot of people. Like a lot. 900,000 people? 900 people in the theater. Yeah.

Wow. And we'll be doing shows. Bubbles and the shit rockers are gonna fucking play. Can't wait. I'm gonna fucking rock out on the top shack. We've got shit to do. Do they have liquor and everything? On a cruise ship.

There's gonna be tons of liquor. Yeah, free liquor probably. That's what a cruise is for. To get drunk. What about food? Food decent? No, they've got no food on the cruise ship. You just... You got to bring your own?

You got to bring your own for four days. Yeah, you got to bring groceries. That's fucked. You'd think they'd have kitchens and shit if they got everything else. We're going to have to fucking drop off and, you know, stop in the soldiers. You got to turn up your sarcasm detector.

I was being sarcastic. Of course they have fucking food. They've got the best food you'll ever eat. Oh, good. Big buffets every day. You just go in and eat like a fucking savage. I mean, it all sounds good in theory. Well, it's not a theory.

No, but the most important thing we've got to think about is stuff like merchandise, man. We got to try to make some money on this fucking boat. Well, there'll be merchandise. The shit rockers, we should probably have t-shirts. I'll have shit rockers t-shirts for sale. All right. Are we going to meet the people?

We're going to meet the people, yes. We're going to meet all the fans. Okay, that's cool. We're going to get drunk for four nights straight. Yeah. That's how I am. Ricky, it's going to be you. I don't think you've quite, well, I know you haven't quite comprehended what this thing is.

It's going to be amazing. And you know what? It's a good Christmas gift. It's only December 21st. Perfect Christmas gift. Well, let's get back to the merch. What can I bring on this thing to sell? Like, whatever I want?

Drugs. Anything you want. No, you can't sell drugs as merchandise. Can we save something else? We should get him to fucking make a little buckle. You should write a book about going to sea. Oh, yeah? Safety buckle?

Just to tell us what you think is going to happen on this cruise, maybe. What you envision is going to happen. I'm afraid. Because if you don't think a boat like that can float and you want to get in a fishing boat, you're fucked. What if you get sick? That could be in your buckle. What if you get... There's a fucking...

There's a whole, like, hospital on the boat. Yeah. An infirmary. They're not real doctors. There's a bigger chance of you getting sick on a fishing boat than a fucking huge cruise, man. Yes, Ricky. Just drink some Purell. You'll be fine.

What do they do with all the garbage? They store it until they get back. Dump it in the ocean? No. But should they throw the fucking, like, food and shit in the ocean? No, they don't. At night. Why wouldn't they?

Because they're not allowed. Could be feeding the fish, man because they're not allowed could be feeding the fish man i'm not allowed to do a lot of things and i still do them they bring the fucking garbage back to shore and put it in the dump and recycle it the way they're supposed to well how is there so much plastics getting in the ocean there's a lot of fucking you know what there's a big problem out there boys with fucking straws and shit and turtles. I know. They say that 99% of turtles in the ocean got fucking plastic in them. Yeah. This is not news, bud.

Well, I don't know. I don't know if we can do anything about it, but, you know. Did you ever see the video of that turtle with the straw up his fucking nose? I know, man. Fucking. It was terrible. Poor little fuckers. I like turtles. Turtles are know, man. It was terrible. Poor little fuckers. I like turtles.

Turtles are fantastic. Yeah, they're nice. Fucking I love turtles, actually. Better up his nose than up his other parts. Did you see that video on the internet there? The pit bull.

It's on top of the big turtle. The singer? He was humping the turtle, but he was humping the turtle shell. Yeah, it was Michael Rapaport. Humping it. The singer pit bull. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. Pit bull, the singer, banged the turtle. Not the singer.

The dog. The dog trying to fuck a turtle. It was dry humping it. And Michael Rapaport screaming at it. Going, you're not fucking anything. You're just banging into his shell. That's a fuck good, though. All right.

Well. Look, Ricky, here's some cruise ship facts. Let me just throw some facts at you. Give me to them. The world's largest cruise ship, the Harmony of the Seas, which is one of the ones I saw. There's two of them. Harmony of the Seas. The Allure and the Oasis. It weighs

226,963 gross tons. Right. And that floats, does it? Yes. Okay. And you're not the least bit suspicious about that claim? No, because it's engineering and physics and buoyancy, Ricky. It would take you 25 years to build a ship that size. No. Actually, you know what it took? Three million man hours. That's 25 years. No, that's not three million hours.

That's three million man hours. So, say, 5,000 people worked on it for whatever many hours that will be divided into 3 million. I think you have to say, don't you have to say person hours now? Maybe, yeah. The largest ships are the same height as 16-story buildings.

Mm-hmm, and it floats, right. Ricky, aircraft. If it was that tall, the wind would just blow it over anyway. It wouldn't be... No, man. No, the wind doesn't blow it over. You can't put something that tall on a little fucking thing that floats.

It's not on a little thing. It goes down. There's a big fucking bottom keel that goes way down to stabilize it. The wheels. No, ocean bottom wheels. You think there's wheels on an aircraft carrier, Ricky? Because they're way fucking bigger than a cruise. I don't know how those work.

They float. More than 23 million people took cruises last year. Is that a lot? 23 million people? You're fucking right, it's a lot. How much do you think the most expensive cruise ship cost to build? 25 million. Billion.

A billion dollars. Fuck off. To build a boat. Ricky, the fucking thing is massive. You don't understand how big it is. You could build a fucking hotel for that. A nice one. Yeah.

The Caribbean Bahamas is the world's most popular cruise destination Guess where our cruise is stopping Where? Private Island in the Bahamas For a big rock concert Doodly doo Oh yeah I forgot Did you know there's fucking people

Like bands and shit coming on this thing? No Oh yeah no I didn't know that Yes Monster Truck Biff Naked. Tom Green. Tom Green, Doug Benson.

There's comedians. Who else is coming? There's other people. We almost had Sebastian Bach. We were that close. Fuck. But he's on another cruise. Legends of Rock or some bullshit.

That would have been good. Who else is coming on our cruise? Steve Jessup. Steve Jessup, funny guy? Yes. He's coming. Boys, I'm fucked. What?

Yeah. I made some, uh... some butter. Good. You know what? Because I'm gonna spend the next two days making edibles. I'm with you.

You know what? I've been wanting to try some edibles, but not yours. I'm going to order some. Fuck off. I know exactly how much is going in. I've got it down to a science now. Yeah, but yours will be too strong, Ricky. I want ones that are made by the medical

people and they're all clearly labeled. Here's how much is in it. Fine. I'll label them, you fucking pussy. I'll say exactly what I put in You know what? I'm on board with Ricky How many milligrams? Give them to me I'm gonna make some candies, some chocolates, some gummies

Some fucking No offense, but I don't trust your math See that? That's a burn on my lip from a joint I'm smoking way too many joints That happens I want to get into the fucking edibles You burned yourself

That's just being too drunk. Oil joints on the bus. Too drunk. Yeah, well, that happens. When are you making those, Ricky? Next two days. I'm going into bake mode. The average age of a cruise ship passenger is 50 plus.

That's not going to be the case. So we're too young to go. No, that's not going to be the case on our cruise ship. That's just like a random, you know, fact of cruise ships, but our cruise ship isn't a normal cruise ship. It's a party ship. It's a party ship.

We're going on a party ship, Ricky. I can't wait to see this in action. I have to see it to believe it because it sounds fucked to me. If you go to the website trailerparkboyscruise.com, you can read all the facts about our actual boat. It's called the Norwegian Pearl, isn't it? I don't know.

If I go on that video tube or whatever the fuck it is, can I actually see one floating? But you'd never know if it was actual size. Yeah, no. I've got to see it to believe it. Fuck. Fuck, here. I'll see if I can...

The Norwegian Pearl is the fucking party ship that we're taking. And apparently the captain is... Sexy? He's a bit of a partier, apparently. So that's good for us. No, it's not. He might crash the fucking ship.

He's not gonna crash the fucking thing. There's nothing to crash into down there. There's no reefy things? No, Ricky. You're out in the ocean. Nothing could go wrong. No icebergs? There's no icebergs down in the fucking Bahamas. They float all the way down, I heard.

All the way over to Europe. There's no fucking icebergs down in the Bahamas. You're worried about icebergs down... What about a shipwrecked? What about it? There, man, see? Oh, fuck. You're not What about it? There, man. See? Oh, fuck. You're not very good at showing videos, Julian.

Well, you're not very good at fucking understanding things. Holy fuck, an Australian billionaire is building a replica of the Titanic. Why? Decent. Why? That'd be just a cool thing to be able to walk on it and go, oh, this is what it looked like. Look at that. Basketball court. Tennis court.

Yeah, but you don't know where that is. It could be anywhere. That's on the fucking boat, man. That's where you fucking eat. That could be a hotel anywhere in the world. But it's not. Look at the food. It looks great. If this is what it's like, this will be great. Look, you get dudes like this with guitars and shit saying,

hey, welcome aboard. Yeah, you don't. you still don't know if that's on a boat oh my god that looks like wind just a few chicks about 70. that's all right so we'll be doing that look we're going to be doing that right there, Ricky. Walking around on cruise ships. Staggering down that fucking... Staggering around, hanging out on the decks. I mean, I've been on a ferry, and that was a big boat. A ferry? Yeah.

Ricky, you could fit 500 fucking ferries that you've been on on this thing. I can't. No, I've got to see it to believe it. Oh, yeah, a big fucking pool. Burr there. Passengers aboard a normal cruise ship consume more than 5,000 eggs in a single day. 5,000 eggs.

5,000 eggs. That's a lot of chickens. That's a lot of fucking, that's a lot of protein. As well as 2,000 steaks and 1,000 baked potatoes. Fuck. Well, I'm eating eggs every day. That's a lot of fucking, that's a lot of protein. As well as 2,000 steaks and 1,000 baked potatoes. Fuck. Well, I'm eating eggs every day. That's a lot of dead animals. 400 bottles of champagne are drunk every week aboard a cruise ship.

400 bottles? We should be, we should be. We're going to break that record. Maybe we could get some potato vodka made up. Get her in the back door. Get her on the back door. Get her on the back door. Oh my fuck, what is this? The Meow Meow

Cruise. A trip dedicated to cat lovers. What? I don't even know it. I've never heard of this. So what, are you switching cruises now on us? Meow Meow. Pops, I'm not going on a fucking Meow Cruise. Oh, boys, the Meow Meow Cruise is going to Cuba.

And you can bring your kitties on the boat. Pubs. Why didn't we do this one? They'd jump off. They wouldn't. Cats don't fucking know. They're dumb. Cats are dumb. They climb on shit and next thing you know they're fucking insane.

I betcha, I betcha, I've got a cat named Einstein. I betcha he's smarter than you. I betcha he can do multiplication better than you. I've got a cat named Einstein. I bet you he's smarter than you. I bet you he can do multiplication better than you. Yeah, let's fucking bring it on. I believe it. Take your fucking little cat on. Einstein, he's fucking very smart. The Meow Meow Cruise in 2019 going to Cuba.

That sounds fucked. What, are there going to be lots of fights and shit going on between the cats? No, we just... Cat people know. Do the medibles. Cat people know how to do it. I'm going on that cruise someday, the Meow Meow Cruise. Man, you know what?

Some days, birthdays, boring. Not on December 21st. A lot of crazy people got born today. Like who? Where do you want me to start? The earliest one. The oldest one, like. Werner Von Trapp.

Werner Von Trapp. Werner. Is it Werner? Yeah. Werner won. The Trapp family singers? The Trapp family singers. Gene Fonda.

Decent. Hot. Yup. Frank Zappa. Frank Zappa was born today? born today he was he's dead isn't he yeah frank zappa 93 he was fucking incredible yeah incredible musician singer songwriter producer bit fucking filmmaker wacky filmmaker oh he was he was out there. Frank Zappa. You don't get much wackier than Frank Zappa, bud. Carl Wilson. Carl Wilson.

Ever heard of him? Yes, I have. Carl Wilson from the Beach Boys. When did he die? 98. Uh, 98. 20 years ago. That's a long time, man.

Wow. Samuel L. Jackson. No way. Fucking right. That's quite a day for birthdays. 48, man. Wow. Samuel L. Jackson. No way. Fucking right. It's quite a day for birthdays. 48, man. Samuel L., he's about as badass as you can get. He's fucking awesome.

You don't give a fuck. Nope. Who else? Samuel L. Jackson. Lisa Gerritsen. Mary Tyler Moore. Mary Tyler Moore? No, no, Bess. She was Bessen. Mary Tyler Moore. Mary Tyler Moore? No, no, Bess.

She was Bess on the Mary Tyler Moore. She was that old bird. Ray Romano. Ray Romano. Is he funny? Cheese fella. Is he a funny dude or what? Ray Romano's very funny.

He invented Romano cheese. Yeah. Which is delicious. That's true. True fact. Ray Romano invented cheese. I think it was his grandfather, wasn't it? Yes.

And his uncle was Jimmy Parmesan. No way. Yeah. Fucking small world. Cheese, cheese family. And Tommy Bree. Wasn't Tommy Bree related to them? What are you guys talking about?

Cheese family. No, man. Tommy Bree, I think, was a long descendant of him yeah and of course their french relatives francois camembert oh yeah you lost me man david cheddar david cheddar yeah david cheddar sammy swiss sammy swiss connie craft single Cheddar, yeah. David Cheddar. Sammy Swiss. Sammy Swiss. Connie Craft single. Connie Craft, but she was single. Andy Dick.

Andy Dick. Is he funny? He's got a very suitable name. Is he a dick? Andy Dick. Yeah. He's known as one of the biggest dicks down there. His father's name, his nickname was actually Biggie.

Biggie Dick. Ricky. No way that's true. Emmanuel Macron. Emmanuel Macron. President of France, huh? Yeah. Wow. He, huh? Yeah. Wow.

He was born in 77. Is that good? Oh, he's just a young guy. He's not a young guy. He's like fucking what? 31? 41, I mean. He's a young president. Hot or not hot?

Emmanuel Macron. I don't know, Ricky. Do you think he's hot? Michael Viter. I don't think, Ricky. Do you think he saw it? Michael Vitar. Don't think I know him. Mighty Ducks 2, Mighty Ducks 3. He's an actor, man. Sunset Grill.

Yeah. And, uh... Steven... Yun? Guy in the Walking Dead. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God, did he ever go out hard on The Walking Dead. Did he ever.

Oh, man, you didn't see it. Horrible. You didn't see it? No. I watched it a couple seasons. The guy, what was the guy's name? The dirty cocksucker? Fuck them over.

What was his name? Negan Yeah Negan fucking cranked him with a bat Right in the forehead And his eyes popped out Who's Negan? Negan was a dirty cocksucker Miserable bastard on the walking dead

Just an awful person A lot of people think zombies are going to, like, fucking, that whole thing's going to happen. The zombie apocalypse, there's people that are fucking gearing up for it. There's people that deep down want it to happen just so they can have the cool gear and the... Start fucking smashing heads. Blasting people.

But Negan came up to that guy. Yeah. I forget what his character, what was his character's name? Don't know, man. Steven Yeun, his character was... It's name? Don't know man Steven you and his character was It's gonna drive me crazy fuck Fuck Tommy Tony Steven you

What was his name on The Walking Dead it's right on the tip of my cock I can't Tip of my cock, and I can't fucking come up with it. The tip of your cock? The tip of your tongue. Glenn! Glenn! Fuck! Glenn!

Negan walks up, and he fucking cracks him in the fucking head with a baseball bat, and his eyes pop out. I think I got that scene here, bud. Oh, watch this. It's one of the most devastating cracks you've ever seen. You're going to fuck it up. I think I got that scene here, bud. Oh, watch this. It's one of the most devastating cranks you've ever seen. You're going to fuck it up. Right in the... That was him. Whoa.

Was he a zombie? No. No fucking way. No, he's not a zombie. Negan just... Oh, yeah, he's got a bat right to the fucking top of the melon. Yeah, and it popped his eyes out like one of those things. I mean, it's all make-believe.

He was banging her, wasn't he? It's all make-believe, though. That's why it's okay. Oh, he's still alive, huh? Oh, yeah. I think he cranks him again. He was okay. He wasn't okay, Ricky. Well, that was... It was one of the most horrific things you know because

if you watch the show it just sort of happened you weren't expecting it it's like oh negan's gonna have word with glenn oh my fuck so why didn't people jump in fucking try to because negan's guys were all around and anybody that jumped in you were gonna get the same same treatment. So everybody just had to watch Glenn take it. I haven't been watching that show lately. Me too. Obviously, I haven't.

It's good. Norman Reedus, he's my favorite. Who's that? Norman Reedus. The main guy. No, he's not the main guy. Well, he's one of the main guys, but he's not the main guy. Norman Reedus is the guy with the crossbow.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The guy that was on the fucking, uh, that movie. Boondock Saints. Boondock. Yeah. Yeah, he's a good dude. He's tried my glasses on before. He's tried these babies on. Did you try any of

his things on? No. Did you get to ride his motorcycle? I didn't try on Norman Reedus' underwear. You sure? I didn't try on Norman Reedus' underwear. You sure? Why would I try on Norman Reedus' underwear? I don't know. See if he felt cool in them?

Yeah. He didn't offer. Is that why you want to buy a crossbow? No, I don't like crossbows. You fucking did. I don't want a crossbow. You went through a crossbow phase, man. Oh, years ago, before I even knew Norman Reedus.

Oh, whatever. I didn't, I don't want a crossbow. It's called a man crush, okay? We're not going to get into anything. I didn't want a crossbow, and I didn't try his underwear on, because he never offered. But you've got a man crush on him. He never offered.

Because you said he's your favorite favorite on the show. Didn't you? Two favorites. He is my favorite. With a little gleam of something in your eye when you said it. No. No gleam. I just think he's a good actor. Would you waltz with him?

I would. That's what I wanted to do. What kind of edibles do you want me to make you? Anything, man. Gummies. I'll make some gummies. I'll make some little fucking candies. Those little nerd ones? Little nerd fellas? I don't. I'll make some gummies. I'll make some little fucking candies. Those little nerd ones?

Little nerd fellas? I don't think I can make those. And they're not going to look like gummy bears. They're just going to be like gummy texture. Yeah. Gummy blobs. I don't have a fucking bear press or a bear mold. I bet you I could.

I bet you. What would it need to be made out of? I bet you I could sculpt one. Maybe we could make gummy kitties. Gummy kitties. If you want to design a mold. What's the mold got to be made out of? I could sculpt one. Maybe we could make gummy kitties. Gummy kitties. If you want to design a mold... What's the mold got to be made out of? I don't know.

Just like, you know, the cookie things. The cookie... So if I somehow use pliers and metal... Metal would be good. Make a little kitty press out of tin. Tin would work. Maybe plastic. I don't... Yeah. Pretty much anything would work.

What kind of heat... Rubber? What kind of heat does she need to be able to take? It's gonna be hot, but not too hot. A tin? Yep. A tin would work. Maybe plastic. I don't, yeah. Pretty much anything would work. What kind of heat? Rubber. What kind of heat does she need to be able to take? It's going to be hot, but not too hot. Boiling. Boiling water, probably.

Okay. I can do that. I'm going to make a kiddie gummy press. Bring it. The fuck? Good, because I'm eating them all fucking Christmas. This is going to be a crazy, crazy fucking holidays, boy. Okay, so Christmas in four days.

Yeah. We're going to be on the cruise. What the fuck is that noise? What is that? What are you doing? What the fuck do you got going on down there? My skirt. My grass skirt.

Did you make that? My hula skirt. This is what I'm wearing on the cruise. It's a hula skirt. You look kind of fucked. Do you have anything on underneath this? You don't wear stuff under them. Make sure you do, man.

Hula hula. Okay, so boys, Christmas time and then cruise time. TrailerParkBoysCruise.com. Great Christmas gift. Have a great fucking Christmas, everybody. Are we doing? Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, everybody. Are we doing? Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, everybody.

Happy holidays for people that don't celebrate Christmas. Get fucking drunk and high with your friends and family. Spend some fucking time with them. If you don't drink or smoke, just spend some fucking time with them. That's right. Don't worry about just when you see an image of Santa, your brain's going to go, oh, fuck, got to go shopping. Got to get all my money spent on toys.

Fuck all that. Fuck all that. Fuck all that bullshit. Stay home and take some edibles. Stay home, get drunk. Are we gonna do one of these over Christmas? Make somebody a card. Draw them a picture instead of buying them a PS4. Did you say something that we were gonna try to do

one of these on Christmas fucking day? I'm not doing one on Christmas, man. Christmas day, we're getting back on here. Oh, man. We'll see. We're gonna be pretty fucked. Boys, it's Christmas Day, we're getting back on here. Oh, man. We'll see. We're going to be pretty fucked. Boys, it's Christmas Day. I'm going to be 100% fucked.

All right. If we do a Christmas Day, though, we still have to make sure we have the fucking bonfire that night. Oh, I'm not missing the bonfire. I've already got the wood. I got eight cord of wood. Oh, yes. We're going to fucking build a...

We should have Burning Man. I should build a Burning Man. Maybe a Santa Burning Man. Let's do it. That would be awesome. Mm. Sign off, Pops. Merry Christmas.

Happy holidays, everybody. Where are we looking? Over here? Over here. Maybe here. I don't know. Let's look here. All right.

Happy holidays. Yes. Get your't know. Let's look here. All right. Happy holidays. Yes. Get your drink on, get your turkey on. Smoke on, your eat on. Edibles on. Drink on. Liquor on. Maybe your fight on.

And just be kind to each other.