Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 39 - Best F**kin' Christmas Ever

Episode Date: December 25, 2019

There's double dip chicken fingers for dinner, a sh*t-ton of weed, awesome presents under the tree, and a stolen inflatable Santa. Time for a DECENT nine-day Christmas party in Sunnyvale! There's even a visit from a f**ked little elf!

Jesus Christ! This Santa, is he on fire? No, it's not on fire, Puffs. Are you sure, Ricky? Let's get this going. We are gonna have a fucking Christmas feast today, man. I think the Santa... Where did you get this fucking thing? It's hard to tell if it's on fire, isn't it? Maybe it's just the oven. I don't know, man. Ricky. Let's get her going, man.

Something's on fire. It's just, bubs, it's just weed smoke. I can't even see you. He's smoking a lot of fucking weed, bubs. My favorite time of year, boys, Christmas. Ricky, you know what? You're drinking hard with your friends and family. Rick.

Having a fucking feast. Rick. What, man? You should have put the crystal tree back there by the TV, man. Why? And this fucking thing, 100 bucks says you're getting in a fight with this later and you're gonna destroy it.

Where did you get it, Ricky? I borrowed it from that rich family over in Portland, States. Fuck off. What are you doing? These the only fucking gloves you got? Well, Ricky, they're rubber gloves. You just gently pull them on.

You don't muscle them on like you're fucking pulling on a condom. Thank you for getting the gloves for him, man. I can't. I wouldn't have been able to eat that shit. Him and fucking chicken. These gloves are fucked. Ricky, they're fine.

There, you got them on? No! As long as you use your fingers, you'll be fine. God damn it. Sit down. Fuck the gloves. It's the Christmas, Christmas perk after dark. Yup, get her going. Welcome to perk after dark Christmas.

Fucking Christmas. Very exciting. Best time of the fucking year. Okay, Ricky, so... Ricky, why don't you fire on the fucking heat pump? Because I don't have enough electricity to get everything going. It's either Christmas shit or heat pump. Take your fucking pick.

Are you fucking kidding me? It's not that cold in here. Oh, yeah. It's a little chilly, but... Okay, boys, can we hand out the presents? That's my favorite part. You keep that fucking happening, I'm gonna double dip our little friends here. And we'll tell people what you're doing, Ricky. For fuck's sake. Double dip chicken fingers of fucking beautifulness.

Okay, so you walk me through it. What type are these? These are, uh, bisquick with some spices in it. Bisquick? Yeah. Biscuit mix. Yeah, and then we're going to double dip the little fuckers into this little cornflake concoction over here. What's the deal on these?

The Gary's garlic salt? That's my garlic salt. Roly's fucking, Roly Gary's roasted garlic seasoning. It's my garlic salt. Just leave it. Gary's. I thought you were going to have the fucking gloves on, man. Roasted garlic seasoning. It's my garlic salt. Just leave it. Here. I thought you were gonna have the fucking gloves on, man. The gloves didn't fucking work very well.

Did you wash your hands? Yeah, I always wash them. Like, seriously. Fuck, man. Okay, here, Joanne, let's start handing out presents. Deedle-deedle-deedle-deedles. Here, these ones are to Ricky. Here, Ricky, can you... This one's a skimmy. Wait a second, man.

That's not a present. I'm giving it to you right now. That's one of the decorations. Oh. I don't want that fucking beaver with the hat on. Okay, here's a card, man. You're fucking things up, Bubbs. All right, here. Put it over there, then.

Is that for you or is that for Ricky? What the fuck is going on here? Did I miss my gift? What did we smoke, by the way, Rick? What the fuck was that stuff? We're on a lot of things right now, Julian, okay? You want me to make a list? Okay, let's do it Julian's way. What would you like to do first?

Smoke the Christmas joints? I thought we had... What have we been doing? We didn't smoke the big ones, did we? I'm fucked! No shit, man. I thought... Holy fuck. Okay, this is to Ricky. But we already smoked the joints.

We smoked quite a bit. Don't you remember the water bong and shit? Yeah, but was that the Christmas stuff? I thought that was like two days ago. Buffs, think fuck we got a few fucking hours before everybody comes piling in here getting wasted. When did we, hey, how long ago did we smoke the Christmas joints?

How long, Buffs? We've had, we've had what, one? We've had one right after breakfast, one before breakfast. But how long ago I smoked my last Christmas joint? Because I thought it was like two days ago. I wish I could cook these. I bet they'd be fucking good, huh? Ricky.

Babs, bubs, it was seven minutes ago. Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? What's wrong, man? It hasn't even kicked in yet. What the fuck's the problem? I'm going to be too high here in a minute. Look, Ricky's got chicken fingers built onto his hands. What the fuck's the problem? I'm gonna be too high here in a minute.

Look, Ricky's got chicken fingers built onto his hands. It's all the gooey stuff he got on there. It's chicken finger fingers. Ricky, just put your fingers in the microwave. All right, just gonna cook these little fuckers. Remind me in seven minutes, I gotta flip those sons of bitches. Seven minutes ago, huh? And now we're reminding him in seven minutes

about the chicken. Oh, I can't. Don't count on me, Ricky. That's probably why there's things on fire. We've probably been cooking and I didn't even realize it. No, the water bomb, man. Gave off a lot of fucking smoke, man. Oh.

All right, what am I doing? I'm setting timers here. What are we talking about? What the fuck am I doing? Penis fish? What? Penis fish? What? Penis fish. Did we ever finish talking about penis fish? I don't know. I don't remember.

The penis fish... The penis fish washed up on the shore. I thought you were full of shit. I didn't know there was such a thing as a fucking penis fish. Well, it's not technically a fish. People are calling them penis fish. They are technically a giant worm. They live under the sand. The water came in, got rid of the sand.

Thousands, tens of thousands of these big cock-shaped worms washed up on the beach, started a whole thing. Penis fish. Now people are having penis fish parties. People were really jamming them into themselves and stuff? People were having penis fish parties where they're trying to... Didn't you go collect a bunch of them this morning? stuff? People are having penis fish parties where they're trying to... Didn't you go collect a bunch of them this morning?

What? Or yesterday? Me? A big bucket of them. Yeah, man. In California? Oh. You were looking for the penis fish.

Are they edible? They're worms, Ricky. I don't know. How many worms are edible? There's a few. Beer grills. That guy would eat those penis fish. Oh, he'd eat it just like a sausage.

If you cook the cocksucker and you split him like a hot dog, I bet you he'd be all right. Fuck's sakes, now I'm going to fucking chicken finger fingers all fucking Christmas. OK, here, Ricky. This might help. All right. Man, thank you.

You're welcome. I don't have a lot of money this year, so most of my gifts to you guys are chicken fingers and dope, OK? Jesus, I almost dropped her. Into the... What the fuck is going on over there? It's for the timer. Which one do you want? Please tell me seven minutes hasn't gone by.

No, no, no, no, no. I'm just saying. Because I am fucked if it has. I like that one. Yeah, let's do that one, man. Get your chicken fingers out of the oven. Alright, timer's set. We, man. Get your chicken fingers out of that oven. All right, timer's set. We're good. Get your chicken fingers out of that oven. Uh, I can't remember if this is for me or from me.

No, this is for you, Ricky. Okay, who's this from? Doesn't it say Ricky on it? It's from me and Julian. Oh, thanks, boys. I think this is a card for you, bud. Don't get mad. This Christmas. Three-doodler.

What's that? Three-doodler. That card's terrible. Don't get mad. What are you talking about? No, it's nice, Julian. It's black, just like your shirt. Boys, what the fuck is this goddamn thing? What do you think, Ricky?

I don't know, man. It's a 3-D doodler. I don't know. What do you mean 3-D? don't know, man. It's a 3D doodler. I don't know. What do you mean 3D? Ricky, you can draw in midair. How? Get her out. Are you kidding me? Get her out. You can draw in midair. I saw it on the TV.

And it's very expensive, but we didn't pay for it. Who's this? This is to me. From who? That's from me. You didn't pay for it. Who's this? This is to me. From who? That's from me. You didn't have to get me anything. Oh, man, this plugs in and everything? Yes, Richie. Never had a Markler that fucking plugged in before. Are you fucking kidding me?

What? Yeah. OK. Number one, plug in and switch to. That's the real deal. Switch to EVS. Mini drone. You could, you know, peek in and switch to... That's the real deal. Switch to UBS. Mini drone. You could, you know, peek in people's windows like you used to do. I didn't used to peek in people's windows.

That's what it is. Bob, that's fucking awesome. I know it is. From me. It's got a clearance sticker here, so does it work? Yes, it works. With love from you to me. All right, thanks, buddy.

Welcome. We'll fly that tonight me. All right, thanks, buddy. Welcome. We'll fly that tonight. OK. Hi, guys. Merry Christmas. Oh, no, no, no, no. What's happening? Nothing fucking happening, bud.

Get the fuck out of my fucking trailer right now. Oh, I came early for the party, right? It's Christmas. It's my favorite time of year, and he's not letting him fuck it up. Well, Merry Christmas, Ricky. Look, I got some candy canes and some chocolate chips. Randy. Randy. We can build a gingerbread house guys.

Randy the party starts in two and a half hours come back then. Julian I'm all alone I don't want to be alone I knew you guys were partying. It's Christmas Randy can stay I said it I called it. Well if he fucks around he's getting hit with the Christmas tree. Fine. You should hit him with the fucking Christmas tree. This looks like a party. What are you making? Are you making chicken fingers? Nothing for you, Randy. No. Come on in, Randy.

Merry Christmas. Alright. Push up your belly. Where should I put this stuff? Up your ass. Here, give me the candy canes. Candy canes. Those will be good.

June, you want some chocolates? There's some liquor in them. Let me see. I got a timer set here. As soon as that goes off, you gotta leave, Randy. Look at this. Gingerbread decorating house. Alright, where the fuck are we moving this thing? Let me see. I got a timer set here. As soon as that goes off, you gotta leave, Randy. Look at this.

Gingerbread decorating house. Oh, decent. We can build that all together. All four of them. Gingerbread house. I'm not building a gingerbread house. Sure you are. What the fuck is a truffle? Truffles are a type of...

I thought truffles were like little, like, mushrooms or something. No, real truffles are little things. Pigs dig them up with their snouts. So fine chocolates and chocolate-covered truffles? What the fuck is that? Fine choc- no, they're just- it's a type of chocolate with the... Whoa! Sort of the... mousse-ay on the top. Okay. Alright. You eat one first.

This is a cool Santa. I'm telling you right now, bud. Don't fuck around. Randy, sit down. He's got a big package. You're gonna have to... Just stop checking out Santa's package. Sit down, Randy.

We're in the... Look, do you know the things on? Yeah, they wired me up. Look. Oh, they put the thing on you already. Who we talking to? Okay, here's the... What the thing on you already. Who we talking to? Okay, here's the, what type would you like? What are we talking about?

I want like a mushroom covered fucking sauce. There's nothing mushroom about them, ding dong. You said a truffle's a fucking mushroom. Can I have one with nuts? No, a truffle is a type of- What do we got going here? Look. I love nuts, hazelnuts.

Hey Randy, you missed the penis fish. There, there's an almond. Oh, thanks man. We were talking about penis fish before you walked in. There's an almond. Oh, thanks, man. We were talking about penis fish before you walked in. You would have fucking enjoyed that one, I bet. What do you mean penis fish? Bunch of penis fish. Bob, chill the fuck out, man.

Those are my chocolate spots. Oh, these are yours? There's no such thing as a penis fish, Ricky. Oh, yeah, you would have been in heaven, bud. 10,000 and washed up on a beach in California. You should book your ticket now. Pot of gold. There's fish that call penis fish.

Yeah, Bub says it's like a worm, but you can shove it into things or you can eat it. Have you ever said that? No, I thought you did. Well, I said about the worm, but not about shoving it into things. Oh, they're worms. They're like eels. Okay. All right, guys, what else we gonna do here?

We're giving out presents, Randy. I'm ready to fucking create here. What is that, Ricky? It's a pen that plugs in, man. Can you get it working, Ricky? Because I saw it on TV, and it's decent. Something's going on here. It's an electric pen?

No, it draws in midair. You might be too high, Ricky. I think I am. It might freak you out when it starts working. Uh, oh yeah. Because it draws right in midair. What do you mean, man? I just don't understand what you're talking about.

Oh, it makes noises. Chicken needs to be flipped. Oh, the chicken needs to be flipped. Randy, go flip the chicken fingers. Fuck's sake. Chicken? You're not touching my fucking chicken fingers. Don't let him touch your chicken. Here, Ricky, let me see it.

I'll try to get it working. Hey, hey, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Was that... Fuck! Was that time I set for the flip? Or for it being cooked? It's seven minutes, man. Then the flip, then another seven. Well, it's not seven minutes yet. How many minutes is it?

You guys are fucked. 19 seconds. It smelled good, Ricky. 17, just a sec. 15. Titting up, Ricky. 17 seconds, just a sec. 15. Tick, no, Ricky.

Man, oh man, you guys know how to party at Christmas time. Shut the fuck up, Randy. Yeah, Randy. Boy, it smells like serious dope in here. You guys got any extra weed or? No dope smoke. Is it working? The fuck? Is it working?

Am I drowning in the air? Nothing, there's nothing's happening, man. It sounds kind of like an air mattress pump. Fuck off. You sound like a fucking air mattress pump. Why the hell does shit stick? I can't get it working. We'll have to read the instructions. They're very simple.

It's lots of fun, Bob. Okay, Christmas gifts, boys. We gotta get at them here. Here, put that over there, because we're gonna build that later. So for my Christmas gift, there's a piece of shit. I didn't get to open one yet. Where's, oh. Alright, well.

Here you go, buddy. Here's a card. Why? Here you go, buddy. Here's a card. Why? I think this is Ricky's card to you. Check that out. Is this to me? It's to you, man. Alright, timer boy. Yes.

Start your fucking timer again. Here's this little teething bag. Two bubbles. There's that one. That's from me. This is from Ricky. Okay. How's it going, Randy? Ricky, I'm opening my gifts.

Fucking shocked. I'm shocked you couldn't figure that out, Randy. I don't know how the freaking thing works. Oh, decent! Yup. Real deal, man. That's a fucking good one, man. Collectors item. A WWE wrestling belt.

Yup. No way. Oh, that is decent. Thanks, boys. Holy fuck. Let's get it. I gave that wrestler the edge. Gave him a call. And I said... This didn't come from the edge.

Yes, it did. What? I said, I need a belt or something. So he said, all right, go to the store, check this one out, officially worn. Beltro. I don't know if he signed it or not. Oh, I think I... Oh, no. Did I break it?

Well, you need a knife or something, pops. Can I trade my gift for something else? No. It was a good idea, boys. It's just that... No, Ricky, read the instructions. I saw it on TV. When it works... Don't wreck my belt. Here you go, bud. That's the deal.

Decent. Look at that. You got it on ABS? Look at that, Ricky. World champ. It looks good, bub. It's a little small. World champ. A little small, but it looks good.

Well, I ripped the Velcro off of it by accident. Oh, fuck. Something's happening here. Draw in the air, Ricky. Draw in midair. Hold on a second. It was happening, then it stopped. You might have plugged her.

Don't shoot yourself in the face with it. It's hot plastic. Yeah, it smells like it. Ricky, you're not gonna be playing with that all fucking day, okay? Why? Because it's not fun. It's fun when you're not gonna be playing with that all fucking day, okay? Why? Because it's not fun. It's fun when you're baked. Well, talk about some shit, then. Talk about Father Christmas.

You got more gifts to open, Ricky. Oh, fucker. Really? Ha ha ha. Well, hopefully it's not a Christmas present for me, huh? Is it? Yeah. Oh, shit.

Now it's fucking coming out. Are you sure? I'm pretty sure about it. This is yours right here. Oh, I. Now it's fucking coming out. Are you sure? I'm pretty sure about it. This is yours right here. Oh, I see how it works. I think that pretty sure is mine, man. Holy fuck. Start to draw with it. Okay, this is some trippy shit happening right now.

Let me see what you got there. What are you drawing, a dick? Hey, shut up, Randy. You know what? It's really fucking hard to control. Mini microphone. What? Mini microphone.

Karaoke microphone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's yours. Mine's, uh... Looks like I got a medicine ball. I was just teasing you, Julian. Jesus, man. I wanted to freak you out, make you think you're opening the wrong one. What is that?

It's a fucking medicine ball. Medicine ball? There's medicine in it? No, it's for working out, Randy. Medicine ball. Why do they call it medicine? I'd love to throw this right at your fucking head right now, Randy. Me too.

I got you the extra heavy one, Julian. It's a 12-pounder, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is good. 12 pounds and right on. 12 pounds of glory. Can't wait to use this. What's it for? Hi, Randy.

How long have you been a dickweed? I'm not a dickweed. God damn it. You got her, Ricky? I got her fucking going out, bud. Bob, how much did you pay for this thing? I'm making a Christmas ornament for my tree. No, but draw a look.

Go right up into the air, straight up. Like this? Yeah. Look, you're drawing in midair. Wow, that was cool, man. Decent, huh? But you can do, like, swirls and things. You could write your name in the air.

Why? Why? Ert. You're doing a good job. Ert. Like white? Nice Randy. It's really trippy when you're high man. I've never seen one of these inside before. Normally they're outside.

Do you want to get inside? Hmm? Nothing Randy. He's pretty cool. Alright, I gotta turn it off man. They're not off man. It's really boring. Oh yeah, Jolene, look. This too. I's pretty cool. All right, I gotta turn it off, man. It's freaking me out too much. It's not off, man. It's really boring. Oh yeah, Jolene, look, this too.

I got this thing. I just wanted to show you. Look, it's a Lamborghini. It's a lambativity scene. It's got all the shepherds and stuff on there, huh? I gotta put batteries in it. Nice! But it actually drives around.

Fuck, I broke my glasses. When I put batteries in it, oh Nice! But it actually drives around. Fuck, it broke my glasses. When I put batteries in it, it'll... Oh, fuck! It is driving around. I made a Christmas order for you. Oh, Jesus, no, it's out of control. It won't turn off!

What the frick, dude? It won't turn off! Hey, man, you're fucking wrecking the place! Stop! It won't... Holy fuck. What the frig, man? I didn't even know it had batteries in it.

Here, man, I made you a little toy for your cats. That's cool Ricky! You just made that Ricky? Yeah man. See look, art! I'm gonna open up a store. That's art. That's art, he's artistic.

You know that cat's gonna fuck that over in like two seconds. My kitty's gonna love that. Julian, can I have one of your chocolates? No you can't Randy. You have a dollar? Jesus Murphy. Alright, here we go. Present number two.

Hope you like it, Ricky. I... like it a lot. What is it? Show them. It's the pin art stuff. You know, when you can press your hard penis against it and it does the exact shape or whatever?

Press your cock against that thing? You watch. Well, you could. I didn't say I ever did. Does the leg vibrate or anything? No, no. It's art. It's art. It's art. More art. Yeah. Watch. Ricky will show you.

We were fucking with one at the dollar store, so I got him one. I wonder if we could bread this and cook it. No, Ricky. You're not cooking it. It's a little... So what do you do with it? Just hold the fuck on! Watch. Sucker. No, you gotta set it flat, Ricky, or it won't lock. What, huh?

Stand it up. Yeah. And now do it from behind and then it'll... I think. This is a great gift, boys. It is. It looks like acupuncture. Ricky.

See that? It hurts. It's your finger. How much did you spend on that now? I'm not telling you. It doesn't matter what the price tag is at Christmas. See my steel gloves? Can I see?

That's all it does. Yeah, it does that. There's my hand. There's my hand in metal form. Wow. See how awesome that is, Randy? That's really cool. Look really close.

Look right at... Here, put him in it. Yeah, watch this. It's a nut pitcher. Watch, here he is. There he is. Look. Looks just like him.

Wow! That's cool! Try it, will you? Put my glass in there, see what happens. Didn't work, man. Julian, don't spill your drink. Can't do it. Holy fuck, what about the check and fingers?

How long has it been? Hasn't been that long, man. All right, here, Merry Christmas. Ricky, check your fingers. Stupid guy. Cuz it feels, no, you're checking fingers. No, man, that's only been about five or six minutes, Bob. I don't think so.

Did you not start another timer? You're the timer guy. Just a sec. Fuck. They must be done then. No, they're not done, man. You don't want to eat raw chicken. It doesn't work.

Just keep them in there for another three minutes. All right. That's my nose. I think they're done, man. See my nose? We don't want to get poisoned, Ricky. Well, I'll be the guinea... guinea thing. Okay.

I'll be the guinea thing. The dope and the liquor is flowing. It's Christmas. I think we should sing a Christmas song, boys. Jingle bells. You Christmas song, boys. Jingle bells! You start it, Randy. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh.

Hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh. Dashing through the... Okay, Randy, it's enough. In a one-horse open sleigh. It's enough, Randy. Over the hills we go, laughing all the way.

Ha, ha, ha. Bubbs, can you please hit him? Randy, you're gonna get tackled into the fucking Santa, and you know it. How are they looking, buddy? Delicious. Have you got any hot sauce, Ricky?

Check the fridge, bubs. What? Check the fridge. Did you rip one apart, see if it was raw inside or what? Check the fridge, see if there's any hot sauce or... Ranch. Ranch is nice on a finger. There's some ranch on the fucking table, man.

Oh. Here's some, here's some hot sauce. Some ranch. Here, look. Oh, yeah, look at that hot sauce. Whose is that? That. Oh, yeah.

There's ranch right here. And I thought we had... Oh, fuck. This is a spicy one. God damn it. Somebody could have helped clean up or something. Here, just wait. Did we open all of our gifts?

You have got two. The two things that we got you. You got two things? I got my microphone and my wrestling belt. Is there no more? You sure? Well, what else do you want, bubs? Well, I thought you guys would get me a few more things.

You know what, bubs? I'm gonna get you some more shit. Just not today. Here, bubs. If you want this, you can take it. This is the deal, though. You buy the batteries, I'll use it every now and then. Merry fucking Christmas. All right? It's yours. Okay. There you go. Ranch. Merry Christmas.

Just get some batteries for that today, though. Paid for by me. Okay. Who's gonna be the tester? Not Randy. So what are these, Ricky? These are your double-dipped, best qu quick and corn flake chicken fingers. Baked not fried. Baked just like us. Baked not fried. It's good man. What's that? Smells like something. Okay.

Obviously it smells like something, Ricky. Oh, it's a dipping sauce. Perfect. That's what I need right now. Jim Kim's. Jim Kim's dipping sauce. How'd they turn out? That right there is perfection, my friend.

Okay. What's up, man? Chicken fingers are done. Perfection, my friend. Okay. What's up, man? Chicken fingers are done. Oh. Are they gone with you? Are they gone with you? Are they gone with you?

I'm gonna put mine back in for a couple more minutes, boys. No, you're stupid if you do. Oh, these are good. You guys know how to party. You know how to ruin a party. You do this every Christmas? Yeah.

Those are something else, Ricky. Wow, that's got a bit of spice to it. Well, usually, Randy, we have a few hours to ourselves to hang out. The three people that are friends here. We talk about the good old times, but... Julian. You showed up? What?

I'm serious, man. It's Christmas. You can still talk about the good old times, Julian. Just because I'm here. I don't mind listening to stories. Okay, let's hear about your good old times, Randy. Well, it used to be Mr. Lavey, he'd get drunk. He would drink about three of these bottles before we'd open up any presents.

Sometimes he'd pee his pants, but that's okay. That's a normal Christmas thing to do. Right? These are really good, Ricky. Thanks, Randy. Are you double dipping, Randy? Oh, for fuck's sakes. Just on the side over here.

Over there, that's my side. Here, Randy, do you want to try some of this dipping sauce? It's really good. Sure, Ricky. Yeah, try that dip, Randy. Try that dip. Well, try that dip, Randy. Try that dip. Well, it's not that good. No? Looks good to me.

Why is it? Ah, just a little bit of this, a little bit of that. So, Randy, shouldn't you be, like, back in your trailer right now, in a few drinks, looking at, like, photos of... It's mostly... Julian, I'm all... You know what I mean? You'd probably have a better time doing that than sitting here with us. You're a lamb.

Driving us nuts. I'm being straight up, bubs. It's Christmas time. Well, he can stay until we're done with some more of his chips. How's the two saucer? That's the shit, is it? I can't believe you even learned how to make these. These are great.

If I gave you... Best chicken fingers I've ever had, Ricky. If I gave you three to take home, would you leave? Maybe I should leave, Bubbles. I don't know. Moe, did you bring us any presents? I just brought the... No wrap presents. Shitty chocolates. Truffle things. They're not shitty. There's liquor in them, for Frank's s chocolates, just truffle things.

They're not shitty. There's literally none. For Frank's sakes, Julian, I thought you'd like them. Those are Ferrero Rochers. Yeah, they're alright. Those are not a cheap chocolate, my friend. You have the ones with the cherries in them? They're maybe... I'd sit and enjoy your company a little bit better, but...

I don't know. You guys are kind of fucking ruining Christmas. You know what? I don't care what he can say. Nothing's gonna ruin my fucking Christmas. I'm gonna have a great Christmas. I got a fucking world's biggest Santa. See? Now this is what you should be doing, Randy. You should mix us up some drinks.

You should get some popcorn going. Yeah. Roll some joints. Put these fucking chocolates on a plate for everybody. It's kind of like you like it when Randy's like a lady. Roll some joints. They put these fucking chocolates on a plate for everybody. It's kind of like you like it when Randy's like a lady. What are you talking about? What do you mean? He's doing some housework. Are you saying that's a lady thing to do? No.

You better watch what you're saying, buddy. I just like when he's like doing something that's, you know, if he's useful, then fine. And you should probably move that crystal tree back there a bit, Randy. It is. Where I added that to it. Let me get the vacuum out a little bit later. I wanna try it with our hot sauce on it. All right, you know what I'm doing?

I'm getting it set up for the big fucking party, boys. This is gonna be the best Christmas ever. Where are you doing it? Right here, man. I'm gonna get the booze out. All right. I'm gonna get some ashtrays out. I'm gonna get maybe some chips out in the bowl. I think we should drink great till New Year's. Clean this shit out and just start partying.

Randy? I like your attitude, pal. Clean that shit up, man. Put this stuff outside. Get some garbage bags. I'm too high. Well, smoke another one then, buddy. Let's unleash a fucking nine day party. Randy, hang these fucking things up all over the place. Okay, once these touch, once these touch, it's underway. Official nine day party.

I'm ready. Merry Christmas, boys, love you guys. Merry fucking Christmas. Randy, move this fucking Santa back there a bit. You gotta bring the coast, we're gonna bring it around here. We gotta lock- I gotta put this up first, boys. Love you guys. Merry fucking Christmas. Randy, move this fucking Santa back there a bit. You've got to bring the coast. We're going to bring it around here. We've got a lot of people. We're going to wish everybody a Merry Christmas and then let's get it on.

We're moving this. Come on, boys. Who are we saying this to? Just, you know. Merry Christmas, everybody. Merry fucking Christmas, everybody. Thanks for, you know... tuning in every fucking week.

They do. Get drunk and high with your friends and family. And if you don't drink, you're de-drunk, just fucking spend some time with your friends and family. Nine day party starts right the fuck now. So get off your computer, or your phone, go up to one of your friends and family

and say we're fucking partying for nine days. Go do it. Rick you should put this fucking Santa outside man. He's taking up a lot of real estate. I like him. Yeah man. He's gonna have one fucking sore neck though.