Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 71 - Johnny Reid Has No Weaknesses

Episode Date: December 8, 2016

All the way from Scotland by way of Brampton and Nashville, chart-topping musician Johnny Reid joins the podcash! Johnny talks about the challenges of growing up as a Scottish immigrant in Canada, and he and Bubbles play a tune he wrote for Joe Cocker! Episode 71 is brought to you by the Official Trailer Park Boys Store, and Neat 'King Bee' microphones!

Are you fucking rolling? Yes. All right, Jesus, we're underway. Finally. We've been fucking sitting here for 15 minutes waiting on... Should we say we're waiting on Chipper? We're always waiting on Chipper. We should fire Chipper.

You gonna start this? Yeah, I mean Bob's please what's going on fuckers. This is the official trailer park boys podcast. It's coming at you right now We got a special guest today, which is very special It's episode 71 Ricky December the 9th two weeks to Christmas You don't say special guest, you say very special guest. I just said very special guest, didn't I?

You said special guest. You said special guest. Well, you say very... I could see the look in his eye. Hey, you know what? You're saying very because you're attracted to him. I'm not attracted to Johnny. How many times have you called Johnny Reed handsome?

I do think he's handsome. He is a handsome man. Well, there you go. Doesn't mean I'm attracted to him. We got Johnny Reed with us here today, everybody. Fucking amazing. I'm glad he's handsome. He is a handsome man. Doesn't mean I'm attracted to him. We got Johnny Reed with us here today, everybody. Fucking amazing. I'm glad you said that. Thank you, man.

I think he's just glad that he can see me. Keep your head on a swivel. So which part of Canada were you from? I was... Ricky. I moved from Scotland originally. Ricky came from Glasgow and moved into a wee place just outside of Toronto called Brampton.

And they talked a little different than Brampton. Brampton, yeah. No, Ricky, his accent is from Scotland, not from Brampton. Well, you lived in Canada a long time. I've been in Canada for many years, yeah, but I surrounded myself with a lot of Scottish people, Ricky. So your accent is still real then? It's still real, yeah, at this point, yeah. How's yours? It's yours?

It's cool, it's just, I mean, you know, you're not always easy to understand. They might need submarine titles for some of it or whatever, but... Yeah, subtitles. But it's cool. I like the way it sounds. Thanks, man. Thanks. What, did you think he was pretending to have a Scottish accent? Some people do that.

Some people. Some people do do that. I tell you, I've actually been... People have said that to me sometimes, like, you've been here for a long time, you've been in Canada for years, you must... That's not a real accent. I'm like, what... What do you think? The fuck is wrong with you? What else do you think?

I had a guy tell me one time, I was in a show, they said to me, well, you don't sound very Canadian. And I said, what... I said, what does a Canadian sound like these days? You know what I mean? And then I guess, Ricky, you'd probably be a good example of what a Canadian would sound like these days. No. I don't know. They say, we say it out and about and...

Out and about. Don't really think we say it like that. And we are in Nova Scotia, you know what that means. New Scotland. New Scotland, that's exactly right. And there's a place just an hour and a half north here called New Glasgow. Why don't they just keep it New Scotland. That's exactly right. There's a place just an hour and a half north here called New Glasgow. Why don't they just keep it at New Scotland?

So, can I ask you a question then? Yes. So the very first time I ever came to Nova Scotia I went to a place called, a guy took me up to his ma's house out in Cape Breton. Yeah. And are you familiar with that restaurant? Yes. The restaurant? The restaurant that you passed

by the liquor chick. Oh yeah. The restaurant? The restaurant that you pass by, the Lick-a-Chick. Oh, yeah. Yes. Lick-a-Chick. That's famous, by the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is famous. There was buses, there was buses and buses of people out there. All women, funny enough.

But buses of people at this place called Lick-a-Chick. The Lack-a-Chick, yes. Yeah, big chicken, big chicken place. Big chicken place, big, and the dairy bar was right next to it. Got a big dirty ice cream. That's what that's saying. I think a lot of the female seniors got the wrong idea. They thought they were going to go there for a different service. Oh, I don't think they did, Ricky.

Who told you that? Well, people got it confused. I think originally it might have been two types of businesses going on there. And old women were, they were getting confused? You think it was like a, like a robin tug for old ladies? It would be a great idea. I thought you'd do a killing business. Who's going to work at it? where they were getting abused? You'd think it was like a robin tug for old ladies. It'd be a great idea. He'd do a killing business.

Who's going to work at it? Corey. Well, Corey would work there. Ricky, nobody. Lekicek was never in that business. T would do it. He's teasing about stuff. Tell you what, the chicken was good. Yeah, I've heard the chicken is really good.

Well, I want to know. Lekicek, I think that made it on the David Letterman show. It was on the David Letterman show, I had no idea it even existed, boys. I was driving past that, I was in Gondini. I was going to a place called Sidney Mine. Yeah, Sidney Mine. A good mate of mine, Bruce Gothrow, was taking me down to his mother's house. He's a good dude.

I was going to get a cup of tea and she was making some lemon squares and all that. She said, come on down to my ma's house. I didn't even know it was a three-hour drive to get to his ma's house. So I ended up in Sydney, Maine. You thought you were going for a five-minute drive? I thought I was going down just down the street to get a cup of tea.

Three hours later, full of liquor, chicken, and a cup of tea and lemon squares. Was it worth it? It was definitely worth it, man. A three-hour drive is worth it. The people listening to us now, we didn't even introduce him. Johnny started getting into shit like... I'm sorry.

A little bit. Johnny Reed's here. Fucking world-famous country singer. Born in Scotland. Moved to Canada. Now you live down in country town USA. I've been a police officer for 15 years now. You guys just played there, didn't you?

At the Ryman. Ryman Theater. You guys just played there, didn't you? Did you not just play there? At the Ryman. At the Ryman Theatre. The Mother Church, they call it. Yeah, we played the Mother Church. I played Folsom Prison Blues. They loved it. Played it.

Everybody went, I was looking for the lights at the front of the stage. I was going to boop the fuck out of the lights, but they're not there anymore. Johnny Cash. Well, Johnny Cash destroyed them, didn't he? I know he did, and I was going to try to do it too. I don't think they've fixed them yet.

I don't think they have either. No, they didn't fix them. Great place, man. So what's it like living in Nashville? Do you go out partying down there? We'll go the odd time, you know, they get the old... They call it the honky-tonk and they call it the honky-tonk. You get down there and basically just get blitzed and sing old country songs and dance with strangers

is basically what it is, you know? I'd love to do that. I've been there for... I know you'd love to do that, you know? I'd love to do that. I love honky-tonking. Actually, I heard about you down there, by the way. I wasn't going to bring this up, but I heard about that episode in the Tootsies Orchid Lounge there where you were dancing with that old elderly woman there.

I might have danced with an elderly woman. I wouldn't doubt it. You remember that? I vaguely do. She probably looked a lot younger. Tell you what, she remembers it. Does she? She was on the news.

I think she might have. If I remember correctly, I think she might have grabbed my purse. You thought she was 35 and she was, I'd say, 71. No, it turned out she was 89. 89? 89, but could she ever dance? And she grabbed you by the... I believe she did.

She might have been reaching for her cane, I don't know. She actually said that she used to work at Lick-A-Chick. Did she? No, she did. She said that's where she met you. Wow. But then it was... He's very close to me, like,

Johnny Reed's following my leg. Oh man, that's good. But, no, it's great. Living down there's been brilliant. I get the same question there, though, you know. You ain't from around here, are you? I suppose. I'm like, no, I'm not. And then you get up and sing and your accent just goes poof. Goes away. Don't say poof, by the way. Oh, yeah, no, no. You can't say that, mate. Not that kind of poof. I heard about poof.

Not that kind of poof. Not the way. Oh, yeah, no, not that kind of poof. I heard about poof. Not that kind of poof. Not the, you know, the Scottish UK poof. It's funny, innit, though, how the words translate, you know? Actually, they don't translate. When I first came to Canada, I remember I had an English teacher, Mr Stetic, his name was, in Brampton. Yeah. And I was in class, and all the people out there

from Scotland, they'll know what I'm talking about here, but I put up my hand, it was my first day, very nervous, like, you know, an immigrant, new boy. I was in there and I put up my hand and I said, excuse me, sir. He said, yes, I said, do you have a rubber I could borrow? A rubber? Yeah. To borrow?

An eraser. Yeah, an eraser, right? And he looks at me and says, excuse me, sir. I said, I'm just wondering if you have a rubber I could borrow. Rubber? Yeah. To borrow? An eraser? Yeah, an eraser, right? And then he looks at me and says, excuse me son, I said, I'm just wondering if you got rubber I could borrow and, anyways, he got very angry at me and he threw me out of the class and made me stand in the hall and the principal came, like, for the school and he said, already in trouble Mr Reid? And I went, I just asked the guy for a rubber.

And he goes, to my office. And it just kept going and going and going. And it was eventually they got to the point where they actually asked me what it was I was actually looking for. I said, I made a mistake in my page. I just wanted to rub her. I wanted to rub her, rub her out, you know. It would have been a fucking awkward scene

if you had pulled down a zipper and pulled one off. Yeah, that would have been awkward. Yeah, that would have been awkward. You would have been like, awkward scene if you had pulled down a zipper and pulled one off. Yeah, that would have been... That would have been awkward. Yeah, that would have been awkward. You would have been like, whoa, they're crazy. Yeah, that would have taken you to a whole other level. What are you doing? Oh, yeah.

I was just looking for the eraser. Lost in translation, you know. Yes, sir. Cheers, boy. Cheers. Cheers. Yeah, good to see you. What is it?

Dolphin in France or something? Yeah, cheers. So you got to play with... You've played with all kinds of people all over the world, wrote songs for people. What's the biggest, the one you're most proud of? Wasn't there something with you and Joe Cocker? Yeah, I did. I wrote a song sitting at my kitchen table one day. You mind if I grab this guitar here for a second? Yes, absolutely.

I'm trying to lead you through the story here, but... I'm sitting at my... I'm sitting at my kitchen table there and... I just bang on the guitar, you know, and just messing around, and I come up with this idea for a song called Fire It Up, which was, you know, kind of like a song of... Just when you think, you know, you like a song just when you think you know you think it's not gonna get any better you know you feel like you've kind of hit rock bottom yeah

you know you've got a choice to make you can either stay there or you can you can fire up fire it up man you know that's so and uh so that's where the song came from so i wrote the song and then i released the song uh out there i put itno, i gael ei gosod yno, ac fe wnes i mynd i ffwrdd. Ac mae gen i ffôn i fy nghymorth Joe Cocker. A'r bobl yn ei diolch yn ei hun, yn amlwg cyn i mi gadael y byd. Ond roedd e'n hoffi'r cwm, roedd e'n hoffi recordio'r cwm, felly roedd e'n recordio'r cwm, ac fe wnes i'r cwm yn Gwrop. Ac roedd e'n llwyr llwyr.

Roedd e'n ffwrdd yn hyderus. Ie, fe wnes i i Gymru, i fynd i'w gweld ei chwarae. It was a huge success. I flew into Germany, went to see him play. It was a surreal, to be honest, you know, just a surreal thing for me, like, to be able to sit in a theatre. Yeah, so you're sitting in the theatre and there's Joe Cocker singing your song. Watching Joe Cocker sing a song that I wrote at my kitchen table, yeah, man. That's awesome. But it was a very...

Buck's kind of easy to play there, is it? It's just too... Can you play this thing, can you? Oh, fuck, I can play this. Don't fucking ruin it, man. I can play the shit out of this. Play the shit out of this ukulele. Don't ruin it, man, it's a good song. You want to try it? You want to try it? Make sure your G string's fixed there, Bubs.

Make sure you get your G string figured out, you know. All right. See, anyways, I'll show you how it goes. There it goes. MUSIC PLAYS That's good, man. Sounds good. All right.

She's sitting there staring out a window Trying to figure out just what to do The last time that she gave her heart away It came back broken in two Like an old abandoned car She parked it down off a lonely avenue She forgot about it till the day That she laid her eyes on you And her heart said fire it up

And her soul said fire it up And her soul said fire it up And her mind said fire it up And let love live again He's sitting in the subway station Watching as the trains go flying by He used to hate the black man To the black man watching as the trains were flying by. He used to head the black man to the black man and reached out and saved his life. And he was pulled out of a darkness,

rescued, blinded by the light. Isn't it crazy how one single act of kindness can open up your eyes Can open up your eyes Open up your eyes And let your heart say fire it up Let your soul say fire it up Let your mind say fire it up And let love live again

Yeah Lord, live again Yeah You got the lyrics for me? You got the lyrics, eh? I'll sing that chorus with you Little heart said fire it up Little soul said fire it up Little mind said fire it up And a soul said fire it up And a mind said fire it up And let love live again Let's go again. Here we go.

And a heart said fire it up And a soul said fire it up And a mind said fire it up And let love live again Fire it up. And a little, little gift Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh Nice, Mose.

Decent. Well done. Nice. Decent. That was good, boy. That was good. I root up. There you go. So, anyways, that was the song, and he recorded that song,

he released that song, it was a huge success for him. And to be honest, it really made a big difference in my life, you know, it was amazing. All of a sudden I found myself in Germany, in Austria, and Switzerland, I was going to different places, meeting different people, because some people wanted to meet the guy who wrote that fire-up song for Joe Cocker. That's super cool, man. It was good, man.

You were telling us a story that you got up and did karaoke, didn't you, in Germany? Yeah, we did. So I had a chance to go see him. We watched him play and then after the show, we went on to a karaoke club for a laugh, you know. Nice. And they had the song and the karaoke. Roedd gen i gyfle i fynd i'w gweld, rydyn ni wedi gweld nhw chwarae ac ar ôl y sioe rydyn ni wedi mynd i clwb karaoke i ffynnu. Roedd ganddyn nhw'r cerdd a'r karaoke felly fe wnaeth y bobl fy nghori i fyny ac fe wnaeth i mi gyrraedd y cerdd ac yna roedd y ffrindiau Grig yn dweud, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, dywedwch chi, I wrote it. I wrote it. I'll tell you who I wrote it with. I wrote it with a dear friend of mine, Alan Frew, with Glass Tiger. Yeah. Yeah. He and I sat down and worked on it. Decent. It was good, man. It was good.

Julian got up and did karaoke in Germany as well, and a big German guy came up and said, ''Hey, I'd like to date you.'' Julian said, ''All right, let's do it.'' Big German fella. No. That's the best thing with karaoke. You don't need to sing at karaoke, you know? No.

What's that thing? These are good. That was good. That's if we play Jeopardy. Fuck, maybe we should play, do you ever play Jeopardy? Yeah, it just depends what the topics are. But if you're playing with Ricky, believe me, this is tough. Go on then.

He's the reigning champion. I am the reigning champ. But he cheats. So how does it work when you sing and you don't have an accent? You know, mate, I don't know. I have to tell you, Ricky, I get... Growing up where I grew up, like, you know, I think a lot of people assume that you're growing up singing...

..singing Scottish songs, which you are, you know, you have a good laugh at singing songs, but the American music really made a huge influence in Scotland, you know. I grew up listening to a lot of soul music and my mother loved R&B. Who were you listening to? Like James Brown? Yeah, no, my ma used to listen to a lot of like Oris Redden and Wilson Pickett and... Sitting on the dock of the bay... Exactly, man. So I grew up listening to a lot of that.

And then my da was a mechanic. My da's still a mechanic, a diesel mechanic. So, he used to listen to a lot of what he called story songs, which was country music, you know. But the country he listened to was like Charlie Rich. No, Charlie Rich, like... One of my first songs I ever heard, man, was this. Was...

Yeah. Un o fy nghymrydion cyntaf oedd yma. Lord, I feel like going home I try then I fail And I'm tired and weary So that was the kind of country stuff he listened to I bet you he listened to Red Sullivan Yeah he did so man I'll do the Sullivan track Now listen I hear you're going to go to Scotland

It's gonna be awesome So when you go to Scotland When I was a boy there was a guy they called State and Kidney What was it State and Kidney? State and Kidney but his name was Sidney His name was Sidney Devine And when I was a boy my called State and Kidney. What was it? State and Kidney? State and Kidney, but his name was Sidney. His name was Sidney Devine, right? And when I was a boy, my granny loved Sidney Devine. And he used to do, Sidney Devine used to go to Nashville

and these other places and take these country songs and re-record them and bring them back to Scotland. Oh, nice. And he's unbelievable. Sort of a cherished man in Scotland. So if you're there. And did he play under the name State and Kidney? No, no, they called him State and Kidney.

But his name was Sidney. So that's the way Scotland goes, you know what I mean? Like if you're telling a lie, it's a porky pie. Yes, I know, I've heard some of those. Telling a porky pie, you know. There was a funny one I heard about the telephone. I can't think what it was though, but it was, I can't remember.

He says, the other one I like is when you don't have a clue, you know, I don't have a Scooby, Scooby Doo, I don't have a clue. So everything kind of rhymes, right? So when you're there in Glasgow, if you pull out an old Sidney Devine song, I'll tell you what, man. Oh, I'll do it, I'm gonna have to learn. The place will go upside down. What one do you recommend I learn?

Oh, OK, there's so many of them. He played basically every famous country song that was ever there. Sidney Devine did a cover of it. One of his most famous was Old Shep. Old Shep, I like that song. Old Shep was a dog. I don't particularly like singing about dogs. I sing about kitties, but I could sing a dog song, I suppose.

He was broad. My granny... they all used to just love him these days you know he really really really loved them and Scotland so right on and I was you have a good laugh if you if you pull something like that oh I'll learn one should be good hey can I do a shout out to my cousin yeah all right I have so my cousin Stephen as in Hamilton just to outside of Glasgow and he is arguably your biggest fan. Oh yeah? He loves the boys, he says he follows you all the time, watches you on television. What's his name?

Steven, Steven McAnally. Facts going on Steven? He's having a good time. So I just wanted to say a big hello to him and all the family, all the cousins, all the aunties and uncles. I'm hanging in good company here. Are they going to come see our show? Tell them to come see the show. They should. Tell them to get the fuck out. We can get them tickets. Alright, well I'll let you know who phones me. I'm sure my phone will be ringing when I hang up here and we can take care of that.

You have to be careful what you wish for though, you know what I mean? You have to be careful what you wish for, though, you know what I mean? You have to be careful what you wish for. Stephen's a great fella, man, and has followed you guys from the very beginning. Decent. I'm sure he'd love to see you. Decent. Best squads. Do you usually drink this early?

Yes. Do you ever stop drinking? When we pass out. Yeah, we don't drink all day. I love it. Do you drink scotch? Scotch? A wee bit. You know, sometimes it works for people and sometimes it doesn't. There's a whisky called Laphroaig whisky.

I really enjoy that. It's a smoky kind of taste in whisky. I mind a wee dram of that from time to time. Did you know we have a whisky out? What's it called? It's called Leckerman's Old Dirty Canadian Whisky. You want to get me a...? We're going to get him a bottle. I'd love to get a bottle of that. That'd be fun.

There could be one testing around the studio here somewhere. I'll share that with my friends. Nice. It's a good whisky. It's not a scotch, it's like a... I don't know, just a rye whisky. It's a rye whisky, Canadian rye whisky. It's fucking good, though. It's good., I don't know, just a rye whiskey. It's a rye whiskey, Canadian rye whiskey. It's fucking good, though.

It's good. Pretty darn good. Well, if there's anybody that should have a rye whiskey, it's probably you guys. I drink rum, but I'm getting into the whiskey because we get some of it for free, so, you know, free liquor, I'll drink almost anything. Free is good, man.

Free is good. Always tastes better when it's free as well. Fucking rice. No, man. I think it does, too. All right, Buzz, we got to play some Jeopardy, man. Come on, I want to get this, I want to anything. Fiddy's good, man. Fiddy is good. Oh, it tastes better when it's Fiddy as well. Fucking right. No, man. I think it does, too. All right, Buzz, we got to play some Jeopardy, man.

Come on. I want to get this. I want to win. Okay. We'll play one round. We'll fire it up. While you're getting it going, I was just going to talk about, it's not a very exciting day on December the 9th, but Julian's favorite movie did come out in 2005.

What, Ghost? No, Broken Backs on the Mountain, Broken Backs on the Mountain. Broken Backs on the Mountain. Oh, Brokeback Mountain. That was released this day, 2005, and you were sleeping over at the theater. You're so full of fucking shit, man. No. I think you camped out.

I didn't camp out. It was a good movie. I heard it was a great movie, man, but I didn't watch it. Oh, you've never seen it? No. You've watched it a few times. What's it called?

Brokeback Mountain. Brokeback Mountain. A couple cowboys. It's about the gay cowboys. It's a fantastic movie. It's good. Two cowboys that are, you know, they get up there in the mountains and they start... Breaking each other's back.

Doing things. But it's a great movie. Oh, yeah. Brokeback Mountain. It's a great love story. Judi Dench was born today. That's pretty awesome. That's great. She's fucking pretty all right love story. Judi Dench was born today. That's pretty awesome. That's great.

She's fucking pretty alright. Who? Judi Dench? Yes. And that fucked up band that sings with the crop circles in the carpet that I like. Her birthday today. Crop circles in the carpet? Yeah, I like that.

What? Because I've seen them. Crop circles in the carpet? Who are you talking about, man? Imogen. Oh, Imogen Heath. Yeah. Oh, yeahogen, he? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Crop circles in the carpet? That's a great song. I don't know the name of it. I don't know it either. I've seen the fucking crop circles, so I get it. So, yeah, it was awesome. You've seen them after you passed out and doing spins with your head. That's what makes those things in your carpet.

I used to be good at doing head spins. You used to be good at doing head spins, Ricky. Well, huh? You goddamn near broke his neck. Huh? Yeah. Or was it his back? His neck was bent at 90 degrees for about six days.

His neck and his back? Yeah, no, he almost broke his back a different way. Broke neck and mountain? Hey, can I ask you a question? Personal question? Yeah. What's with the velvet Jesus? That was along the rag. Yeah. Yeah. with the velvet Jesus? That was along the rag. Yeah.

Yeah. Used to keep him safe when he was driving rig. He'd have that hung in his truck. Is that right? Yeah, that's what he said. Amazing. It's pretty nice. My granny used to have a velvet Elvis.

Everybody had a velvet Elvis in Scotland. Lots of people, yeah, it was a rule-in thing at one point. Was it just like a painting? It's better. Did she have an actual 3D Elvis? No, no, it was just a painting, man one point. Was it just like a painting like that, or did she have an actual 3D Elvis? No, no, it was just a painting, man. But I remember Mrs. Prentice, that used to live next door to my gran,

Mrs. Prentice's daughter, Helen, she was mad for Elvis, mad for him. And she had this big velvet Elvis. Decent. As soon as you walked in. That's fucking crazy. That's awesome. That's awesome.

You know, Elvis never went there. Elvis never left, if he were here, never left North America. He only, like, he never toured, like, he never toured the world, you know? He's the biggest, you know, arguable. You don't ever see, that's true, you don't see Elvis live in Japan. It's kind of a dickish thing to do. Yeah. Just shut out the rest of the world.

No. Well, he didn't have to. Why would he bother? He's the king of rock and roll. Yeah. It was all perception, of the world. No. Well, he didn't have to. Why would he bother? He's the king of rock and roll. Yeah. It was all perception, right? It was all perception.

And his manager didn't want to let him get away. The Colonel. Yeah, he wanted to keep him close. Yeah, the Colonel didn't want his meal ticket to get away on him. Yeah, yeah. It was cash cow. And then he owned up that Kentucky Fried Chicken, didn't he? Yes, he did. And then he opened up that Kentucky Fried Chicken, didn't he? Yes, he did.

Then he really hit the money. After that, right. Have you ever been to Graceland? You must have been there. I go to Memphis all the time. I've got a good mate of mine in Memphis, a guy named Robert Nicholson, another Scottish guy. Memphis is a great place, man. Oh, we've been there.

Talk about soul. It's dripping in soul music. They wouldn't let us in Graceland for some reason. Is that right? Well, Ricky, I mean, you were staggering around with your pants to your knees. Drunk as fuck. No, was that Graceland? That was Graceland. You were out front, your pants were right down, and you were like,

Elvis! Elvis, let us in! You thought Elvis was there. Don't take me to places when I'm drunk next time. So that's your fault. That one's on you, bubs. Did anybody mistake him for Elvis? That's my question.

Couple people. See, I can't over spite him. They think he looks like that Ravine guy, you know, the hypnotist guy, he's dead now. Man they call Ravine. He's a man they call Ravine. Yeah, he's a lot like him. Maybe they look like me, that's the thing, right?

That's it, my bad, yeah. Elvis could've said, I wanna look lot like me. Maybe they look like me. That's the thing, right? That's it. Elvis could have said, I want to look like that guy. Maybe. It's obviously working. I think it's working good. All in approval. All right, you look good, bud.

One question. Okay, one question. Winner takes all. One question, winner takes all. The categories are USA. Oh, he could, he could, he question. Winner takes all. One question. Winner takes all. The categories are USA. Oh, he's been living there 15 years. Ceremonies, magazines, zoology, TV blondes, or anagrams. All right.

TV blondes. Let's get it going. Oh, I thought, okay, we're not going to... I didn't know what was happening there. I thought you'd hit the buzzer. We were going to let the gas pick the category. He should have hit the button. He's all right.

TV Blondes, you're good with that? Yeah. For what price point? 200. 100. 200. She was the third actress to play Chris Cagney, but she played the role the longest

The third actress to play Chris Cagney That's not fucking 100 That's 200 That's 200? Let's go 100 Let's go 100, man Fuck that The answer was Sharon Gless

I would never have gotten that That's a thousand dollar question For 100 On this sitcom, Lara Piper plays Vicky, the new blonde student in the IHP. What in the fuck? This is in jeopardy, man. Yes, it is, but it's very difficult. It's genius.

Just pick something you think you'd know. Fuck. These are fucked. I was thinking like Lonnie Anderson, you know? Yeah, yeah. Something easy. Well, maybe she's down here. Who's that other hot chick that was on Charlie's Angels?

Fer Fawcett. She was a good one back in the day. Pamela Anderson. There's only a few. There's a few, but I mean, who the hell? Zoology for 100. Zoology. Got this one for sure.

A turtle's... Oh, shit. Come on, Ricky. What, Ricky? A turtle's what? You know I'm going to say cock. I don't know. It's probably wrong.

It's not a turtle's cock, Ricky. Ricky? A turtle's can be elongated or spherical, and turtles usually bury them in sand. It is a cock. What is a turtle egg? What is a turtle egg? Yeah, I ate it first, man. Turtle eggs.

I said, what is a turtle egg? I had a question. Julian got it for 100. How did we go from genius questions to fucking grade not even one? A turtle egg. Fuck, that was a trick. Hey, man.

Gotta know a bit of everything, Ricky. But see how they described it in a way that could be a cock? Turtle egg. Fuck, that was a trick. Hey, man. Gotta know a bit of everything, Ricky. You keep telling me that. It's a chance he's a buddy in the sun. But see how they described it in a way that could be a cock? They were hoping someone would blurt that answer out. Yeah. Well, let's go zoology for 200. For 200. This Antarctic bird's name was first applied to the now extinct flightless great auk of the Arctic.

Johnny Reed's in. Penguin. name was first applied to the now extinct flightless great arc of the arctic johnny reads in penguin that's a good answer i don't think it's that's a penguin there's only so many buttons yeah really penguin all right what was that for 100 that was for that was for 200 that. That was a one-er question. He's leading the game by 100. All right, get it going, man. It could have been the Arctic Ox Strip. And it should be phrased in the form of a question, but we let the guests get away with it.

Are you fucking kidding me? What is a penguin? I won. What does he get special attention for? Well, I know what a penguin is. That's what I answered. I know, but you're supposed to say, what is a penguin?

It's Jeopardy. That was the answer. Family Feud. He's the guest, so he gets a freebie on that one. Johnny Reed is beating Julian. Because he's smart up here. That should be a half a point. Like 100.

100 a tie, maybe. Okay, Zoology for 300. I'm going to have the winner take us all. Zoology. Because I won. Okay, Ricky, I think you might get this one. If you blurt out the same answer. Both male and... What is a cock?

Is that what you said if I blurt out the same answer? No, Ricky. Okay, never mind. Cancel that. Bring it in. Both male and female heart of beasts have leer-shaped ones. What?

So is it a cock? Male and female heart of beasts, heart of beasts, have leer-shaped ones. What? So is it a... Male and female heartabeasts, heartabeasts, have Lear-shaped what? Johnny Reed's in! What is horns? Holy fuck! Johnny Reed!

Horns. Brings it home for 300. He is killing it. He's 500. This means I need to come back for a rematch. Ha! Yeah, that's what that means. That's it. This means I need to come back for a rematch. Ha ha ha. Yeah, that's what that means. All right.

Should we do one more? That's it. The winner takes it. Oh, you want to all of a sudden, you never want to do a winner takes all. I got double or nothing, man. Come on. You want to do a winner takes all now and he's destroying it. He'll see that the first one he blew because it wasn't questioned. Do you have any weaknesses? Weakness?

I mean, Jesus Christ, you write music that sounds awesome. You're fucking good looking. You're smart as fuck. Good looking? This is the shit. I'm telling you, man. This is not fair.

Okay. Zoologist? No, we're not still playing this fucking game. He won. Zoologist. Ricky Declare. All right.

That's up. Johnny Reed. All right, okay. You know what? You're a good... Johnny Reed fucking won. That's all this shit. Ricky Declare. All right. That's up. Johnny Reed. All right, okay, you know what? You're a good... Johnny Reed fucking won. ...tactile.

That's kind of scary that I won Horns and Penguins. It's Horns and Penguins. It is under protest. We'll get back to you. Horny Penguins. That's a good band name. Or a good song title. Horny Penguins.

Horny Penguins. Or a good... The Horny Penguins. The Horny Penguins. Or if you wrote a song called Horns and Penguins. Horny penguins. We're good. The horny penguins. The horny penguins. Or if you wrote a song called Horns and Penguins. Yeah. The first song's called The Slade. If you did The Slade, you know. Horns and penguins.

You could have a horn section and just some penguins running around. You could, you'd have to have horns in it. Or you'd try to make the penguins play the horns. You shove their beaks down in the thing and see what sounds come up. Right? Ram his beak into a trombone and see what you get. Yeah.

You might get something nice. I'm doubtful. They wouldn't be able to play very good with their wings though. No, they'd be near noughts. It'd just be one nought. Yeah. Just be this note. That's all there is. There's no way that's happening.

All right, is this all? Are we done now? I lost, everything's cool, two weeks before Christmas. Yeah. Yeah. Merry Christmas, by the way. Merry Christmas. I hope you guys have a good one. Thanks for coming in. Safe travels to you guys. Where can people buy your music and all that shit?

You can go to Spotify. I just had a big Christmas album that came out there a couple of years ago and that's still available worldwide. Decent. Awesome. So you can go on iTunes, Spotify. Johnny Reed. Look him the fuck up. He's awesome. Yes, sir.

Good to see you guys. We're going to play for us tonight? Yeah, we're going to get together and do some soul music tonight, so I'm super excited about that. Decent. Decent.