Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 77 - Ricky for President, 2020

Episode Date: January 18, 2017

The Presidential Inauguration in the USA has Ricky pondering a run of his own in 2020, and he already has a slogan! The Boys also discuss the genius behind the “Hollyweed” sign, the best ways to harvest kitty fur, and Sunnyvale virtual reality!    

I Kidded me can't help it. What is wrong with you can't help it. It's natural thing to do natural function You can't help it. It's a natural thing to do. Natural function. Turn me loose. I gotta do it my way. Ricky, you shouldn't.

Ricky, why have you been singing Loverboy all fucking day? Because he got smoking the shit. What the fuck was that? It's Friday, boys. Yeah. And I haven't lost my memory all week. Tonight is the night. Vodka.

Pre-planned memory loss. A little beer? Yeah. I'm giving her tonight, boys. I've been eating healthy all fucking day. Yeah, you smell like it. Jesus, man. Here, have some broccoli. I think broccoli and beer makes a nice combo.

Believe me. What, are you trying to find the ultimate combo to fucking kill us here, Bubs? Just seeing what works. Well, that last one worked. It was horrible. I'm going to take it up a notch.

How are your... This here is the nice ingredient that gets things percolating. Beer and vegetables. That does it, right? I got a bit of energy. I feel good. You know what, though?

I'm going to excel all my energy at once, quickly, and then I'm going to have a nap. Get ready for tonight. All right. Well, you can do that. Just walk me through the logic of that, Ricky. You've got a bunch of energy, so you're going to get rid of it all. Just excel it all at once. In five minutes.

No, in a half hour. We're going to at least get through this fucking podcast. Fuck. How are you going to at least get through this fucking podcast. Fuck. How are you going to get rid of your energy? I don't know.

I'm going to be energy man for a little bit and then I'm going to not be energy man and go to sleep. How are these

little, these are like, how are the baby clown turds? Are they tasty? I'm not used to putting healthy stuff in here.

They're delicious. Baby clown turds. They're little mini carrots'm not used to putting healthy stuff in here. They're delicious. Baby clown turds. They're little mini carrots. Everybody loves a mini carrot. They're crunchy. Alright. Fuck. You know what? Carrots aren't bad. You've had a carrot before, haven't you? I don't think so.

Mmm. Especially when you dip them in this, whatever the fuck this is. Ranch juice. That wasn't a double dip. I see the bit ends up here. See the way I did that? Probably shouldn't be eating on the podcast, though. Real wild, crunchy stuff. We haven't even started the fucking podcast.

What's going on, fuckers? Welcome to the Trailer Park Boys podcast. Episode number 77, January 20th. Coming at ya. Nice. Where am I looking? Right at your camera, man, over there. I forget who it's brought to you by.

That wasn't bad, but you shouldn't do it with the carrot in your mouth, man. Oh, yeah. But it's all right, we're fucked. There's a lot of things you shouldn't do with things you put in your mouth, either. Maybe you shouldn't just put them in his mouth. Or maybe you should if he likes it. What the fuck are you guys talking about? Julian's

baked. No shit. Okay, we tried those VR games. Not a good idea if you're really baked. It'll fuck you up. I think it's a great idea. It was awesome. I was shooting the fuck out of stuff. VR, I am full on, 100% in on VR.

I want to live in VR. You've been on that thing way too much, man. Well, it's wonderful. I want to make a game, my own VR game, where you're in, you just, you come out of this barn into this big meadow, and there's like two million kitties. And you just run and roll in them

and let them jump on you. That'd be the best VR game ever made. I thought you were going to say, and you walk in and you in them and let them jump on you, that'd be the best VR game ever made. I thought you were going to say when you walk in, you got a fucking M60. No, Ricky, why in the fuck would I create that game? So maybe you should explain VR a bit in case there's people like VR. What the fuck are they talking about?

VR, virtual reality, is this fucking crazy little helmet you put on that goes over your glasses, and then all of a sudden you switch it on and boom, you're in a fucking other world. Because I always thought it was just, you know, you'd have a little screen in front of your eyes. I didn't understand that it was the whole. Yeah, man.

You can turn around 360. Could they do a game like where you come to the trailer park? Yes, that's what I want to talk to one of the game companies about. That'd be fucking cool. Because people could put on the helmet and then they would be there at the park with us. They could get right in the car with us. Get in your car. Go rob a liquor store or something.

Go rob a liquor store. That would be fucking great, man. That would be amazing. They could smoke a joint with you, Ricky. That would be fucking cool. Because you've got the little wandy things. I played a game where you could actually pick up a cigar and you do that and it stays in your mouth and you light it. Can you taste it?

No, there's nothing there, Ricky. It's just in the goggles. And if you look down, you can see the cigar sticking out of your mouth. I bet if it was real enough, though, it would fuck your brain up and your brain would make you taste it. If it was real enough. If you were high enough, I bet you you'd start tasting. Do you think one healthy item would cancel out one joint? Like if I was going to have 15 to 20 joints

throughout the day and night, and I ate 15 carrots or maybe 15 carrots, what are these things called? Those are, oh, those are called, those are just sweet peppers, Ricky. Very sweet. They're kind of sugary. Yeah, they're delicious.

What do you do with them? Just bite it. You eat the skin? Yeah, just bite the whole end off of it. Just the whole thing right in the mouth. Do you chop her up? Yeah, you can dip her. I prefer it without the dip.

Without the dip is better. Yeah, because the dip is... How is it, Ricky? It's... it's a bit... it's not really sweet. It's not? No. It's a bit... Must have got a bad one. Must have got a bad one. It's a bit spicy. Are they spicy? No, they shouldn't be spicy, Ricky.

No, actually, it's not spicy. I don't know what it is. These actually, you know what, these don't taste too bad when you're baked. Okay, what does it taste like? Fuck, boys, you know what? All these years I could have maybe been eating a bit healthier. It actually tastes alright. Really. Well, there you go, Ricky. You learn something new every day.

What is it called again? It's called a Hungarian Cool Pepper. Hungarian Cool Pepper. Cools your mouth down. Hmm, neat. Is it cooling your mouth down, Ricky? I wouldn't go that far, but it's all uh... It's all right. It's nice. All right. Okay. That sucks.

I'll bring in some different peppers next time. Today's a fuckin' pretty big day, boys, for some people down southern of us. Why? Why is that, Rick? New president today. Oh, that goes down today. Yep. Holy mackerel. Wonder what the fuck's gonna happen. Donald. Holy mackerel. I wonder what the fuck's going to happen. Donald.

The Donald's in, is he? Donald Dump is going to be inoculated or whatever they say it is. Inoculated. Inoculated. Yeah, he sure is. Yep, he's going to get inoculated today. That's kind of big news, isn't it? Yeah, but really, who gives a fuck?

People seem to give a fuck. Well, people do, but a lot of people don't, right? So you're... Well, it's a pretty big deal, Julian. The president of the United States influences the rest of the planet, don't forget. It's not like it doesn't affect us. Doesn't do a fucking thing for me. Nothing. He's not a very good speaker. You don't think so? Doesn't speak well. Well, because he just fires off whatever the fuck he wants. He doesn't really think about it at first, I don't think. I think he just... You think you'd do a better job delivering speeches and shit?

I don't think I'd be any fucking worse. Really? I might swear a little bit. How would... Ricky, if you were going to address the nation right now, do... You know how they do the State of the Union, address the nation. now, you know how they do, the State of the Union, address the nation. How would you start?

I'd be the first president who'd walk out, and I'd be fucking real. I'd walk out, and just everybody would be clobbered, so I'd start clobbering a little. I'm like, what the fuck is going on, everybody? We did it. All right? And then I don't know where I'd go from there.

What did you do? Yeah, well, we won. I'm the president. So that's how you would start your address to the nation? My motto? Slogan. What's it called? Slogan.

Let's go, America. We're not going to fuck around anymore. Something like that. You know what? People will probably vote for you. No more fucking around. Maybe you should run, man. Ricky. Let's go, America. No more fucking around. That will be your presidential slogan. Something like that.

And then people will clap again, right? And then you'd start clapping again. Is that what would happen? Yeah. That would be fucking amazing. No more fucking around. Ricky. Ricky for president, 2020. I would love to fucking see that happen, man.

You should go for it. It may not work for a while. Why don't you run for prime minister of Canada, Ricky? That's more realistic. I don't think it pays as well. Well, you don't do it for the money. It's not that really high paying of a job. It pays a lot more than some jobs, for sure.

But the thing is, you're the president, you're the prime minister, you're not spending any money. Everything's free, like basically. True, oh no, don't get me wrong, you make a lot of money and you get a free house. The White House, all free, he doesn't pay for that. But I believe he's not even gonna stay there. He's got a new White House in New York doesn't he? I heard he's just gonna stay in New York and say fuck the White House. Which is pretty big. Pretty big. Pretty bold. What the fuck's growing in there? Yeah that's all the seeds Ricky oh yeah eat those those are the best part they're like little can it's like candy

alrighty okay that was lots guess what else happened on this day in history what else happened this is a good one, boys. Remember this? 1982. Ozzy Osbourne bit the head off a fucking bat in Iowa. He did that? In August 82. January 20th. How many years ago was that, Ricky? 82.

44. Is that right? No. That's not even close. 34. 34. That's what I meant. Guess whose birthday it would have been today or is today.

Who? Who? Maybe Buzz Aldrin? Yeah. Buzz Aldrin Yeah Buzz Aldrin Yeah he's the astronaut guy that you fucking had a crush on isn't he He's still alive That's what I meant It's his birthday today

Yep Happy birthday Mr. Aldrin Hope to get Up to space one day Maybe you could help me with that Buzz there's not a fucking chance No He's ever watching this podcast.

Buzz Aldrin might watch this podcast. Don't think so, man. Buzz Aldrin could very easily watch this podcast. He's very hip. There's no astronauts watching this podcast. What is it? It's just got some dip on it. I didn't want to dip my freshly bitten.

Just so you know, Jacob was digging at his ear with that thing for about two hours yesterday. Ricky, why would you dip the fucking marker in the... I didn't want to double dip. So you jammed a dirty old marker in it instead. Full of earwax.

So it's better to double dip. Good lesson got learned here today. It is, yes, if you're going to use old markers. Look at that.

Good as new. Guess who else's birthday it is today? Bill Maher. Isn't he the science guy? Hmm. Who? No, that's Bill Nye, Ricky. Ah, fuck. Bill Maher is the comedian.

He's hilarious. It's his birthday today, is it? Yep. It's somebody else's birthday too That Julian's gonna be pretty excited about Used to wear the makeup Twisted Sister Paul Stanley Paul Stanley

Yeah And we used to dress up like Kiss for Halloween I used to dress up like Kiss for Halloween too It was actually me that was Paul Stanley Oh, he was Gene Simmons with the tongue That's right Going at all the girls Stick his tongue out He was Gene Simmons with the tongue. That's right. Going to all the girls to stick his tongue out.

He was Gene Simmons with the big tongue and the big muscles. Yeah. All right, that's all I got. Well, that's really something. That was something else, Ricky. Thank you very much.

What do you guys got? Anything fucking fun to talk about? We're trying to figure out some good ways to make money this year, 2017. This is one for you, bubs. This chick, she makes

fucking, she takes, she recycles dog hair and makes sweaters and ponchos and gloves and hats and all kinds of shit. People are buying it. Like, big time. Dog hair sweaters. Yeah, but you could do a kitty hair sweater. I'm not making kitty hair sweaters. How is that recycling?

What do you mean recycling? Well, it means the hair's not just going in the garbage. Yeah, but it's not fucking... What's a hair? It's not a toxic. It's a... Oh, my fuck.

Well, fuck. You recycle shit that's bad for the earth. It's fucking hair. It's probably good for the earth. It just means that they're using it for something else. Why would hair be good for the earth, Ricky?

Birds make fucking nests out of it. And I think it turns into oil after many, many years. How many birds have you seen make nests, have a dog hair nest? Oh, fuck. Lots. That's what gives them the comfort. No. And warmth.

So you think birds are making nests out of dog hair? They'd be done. So that it's comfier? I think they probably do, with feathers and stuff. Because you don't want to really go to sleep on sticks. You don't want to lay eggs on sticks, because sticks break eggs. Holy fuck. Maybe that's part of the problem.

They're looking for dog hair, and they can't fucking find it. Oh, you know what? They're making sweaters and shit out of it. That just's part of the problem. They're looking for dog hair and they can't fucking find it. Oh, you know what? Because people are making sweaters and shit out of it. That just gave me a good idea. Why don't we make cat hair pillows? It's all inside. You can fucking deal with it. It'd be comfortable.

Would it be better than a... I have two cat hair pillows. A goose down? Or a duck down? Oh, it's better than fucking duck down. Why don't we start making those pillows then? Do you know how much hair it takes to make a pillow? You got over a hundred cats.

Shave them every fucking couple months. I don't shave them. I collect the hair that falls out naturally. Well, we got to speed up that process. No, Ricky. We could use a vacuum or something. No, you're not. You fucking put a vacuum on one of my kitties and see what happens.

You'll get a shot back right on your wiener. He'd probably enjoy that. I wouldn't enjoy that. You stay away from my kitties and their hair. Their hair falls out when it falls out. Walt, you got any better ideas? What if you put the shot back on blow instead of suck? And you put them up in front of a big

bag catcher and you just blast them with air instead of sucking them and blasting Do you know how terrified a kid he would be if you

blasted him with a shop vac on blow? It could be straining his legs or whatever. Put earmuffs on him. Tie him down? Maybe cover his eyes.

Put something over his whole head so he doesn't know what the fuck's going on. So you're going to put a hood over his head. Yeah. Tie him to something. Tie him to something and shoot him with a shot. You know what? That's kind of mean. I like cats, but I'm just trying to think of a way.

We can get them drunk first. The best way to get the hair, to make the... I'm not making fucking cat hair sweaters. Pillows, man. Pillows. I have two cat hair pillows. That's all I need. Socks. I have some kitty hair socks I made.

Do you like them? They're very comfortable. Let's get it in. Are they dry clean only? Because that's a pain in the ass. No, I wash them by hand. There's like no overhead in this business at all. It's all profit, every single bit of it. It's not all profit,

because my time to make it costs big money. What if we just shave them in the spring? Because then they'll be cool for the summer, hair grows back for winter. So every spring we start making pillows. Ricky, you're not shaving any of my kitties in the spring. Okay, why don't we just go out, walk around the neighborhood.

Shave other people's cats. Shave other people's cats. You're not... And give them a nice meal and shit. Make it worthwhile for them, for the cat. Give them a nice meal. Yeah, maybe some fish, something they don't normally get. We didn't even put like a little tank.

We got no fucking fur left. The overhead's going up now. We're supplying fancy meals to the cats before we shave them, are we? We could get the fancy meals from somebody else and not really spend anything. That's the way we do that, bubs. How fucking baked are you guys? Very. We're not going around the neighborhood shaving people's cats.

I'm just trying to make some... To collect hair to make sweaters. Or pillows. Or socks. Or socks. None of the above. I don't know. We're missing out, man.

Fuck's sake. Why don't you shave Randy down and make a fucking sweater out of him? Are cats warm in the winter, do you think? It depends, Ricky. Because the other thing it could make would be insulation for your house, a cat here. You need a lot of that. That's a bit of a stretch, man. That's way too much.

Maybe insulate like a thermos. Like a, you know, make a thermos out of it. We need bigger cats. We need like tigers and shit. If you could hold those fuckers down and shave them. I don't think it's not worth doing that, man. That's when the overhead starts. You gotta get the trainers.

What else you got, then? Fuck. It's obviously not gonna happen. No, it might happen. It's not happening. Alright, there's this other woman, okay? I mean, I've been to a few fortune tellers and shit. Yeah. Psychics. Some of them are good. Some of them are bad.

This chick, she claims she can predict the future using asparagus. She's 99% of the time right. What the fuck are you talking about? Asparagus, man. How does, what does she use the asparagus for? Don't know.

Fortune, fortune teller. That's the shit that makes your peas stank. Yeah. She's been doing it since she was eight years old, so. What is it? She does it like finding water with a stick? Or she holds it up in front of her?

I don't. She's tried using other plants like broccoli and shit. None of them worked as well as asparagus. She's out of her fucking mind. Like the broccoli. That's a. That's working a bit, but not as well as the asparagus. The poor thing is out of her mind.

Yeah, I'm calling horse shit. Does it say how she uses the asparagus? Maybe it's a tea leaf. She boils it up, and then the asparagus residue tells her. She's fucking crazy. Somebody needs to fucking do something. I don't know. See, why couldn't we have her?

Wouldn't you love we have her? Wouldn't you love to have her on as a guest? Big time. And get her to get her asparagus out and show us? See, that's the only way I'd be able to believe that she's, like, a phony or not. She'd have to actually, you know, do some fortune telling on me. Okay, I'm trying to figure, like, this is,

I can't read this shit. There's no way she can tell the future with asparagus or any other fucking thing. Okay, well. People that believe in that, I don't know. Well, some of them are good. I've gone to one that actually came true. They're all scam artists.

They talk in vague generalizations. What does that mean? They just say really vague shit And then when something happens You're like holy fuck That must be what she meant That Long Island medium That's on that TV show Whatever

Talking to people's relatives Jesus holy shit This is the world's first I saw this It's pretty funny actually talking to people's relatives. Jesus, holy shit. This is the world's first I saw this. It's pretty funny, actually. There's footage of a monkey banging a deer. I've seen a monkey banging a deer. This is the world's first footage I saw.

But then it starts to make you think. What would you get? What kind of disease would you get? It wouldn't be a donkey, because we already have a donkey. You'd get a mirror. A mirror? A monkey deer. A mirror. A monier.

A monier. A monier. All right. Monkeys will bang anything. Anything. Or a crazy. A dinky. A what?

A dinky. A dinky. A dinky. That sounds good. It sounds like it's. A deer monkey. A dinky. A dinky. That sounds good. It sounds like it's... A deer monkey. A dinky. Yeah, I like it. It's similar to a donkey, but it's got a monkey tail.

A deaky. It's got a monkey tail and a monkey head. A deaky. It sounds like something from another language. Hey, look, it's a deaky. Well, I'm glad you're not into... Look at the deaky. I'm glad you're not into monkeys like you are cats, because I would be gone, man.

I would have left long ago. Fucking dirty-ass little monkeys. What? What? Man. Hoo! Fuck. Bob's, I will seriously throw up, man.

If that happens, it's right there on your laptop. Oh, that is thick. Yeah. Thick thick. Yeah. Thick and meaty. Is it safe to breathe yet? Yeah. You're a fucking asshole. Trick ja.

Trick ja. Don't blow it that way. Ricky, don't blow it on the existing vegetables. All right, is that it? We're done? I can have a nap? Get ready for tonight? Tonight's gonna be fucking crazy. It's gonna be a good night,

but we still gotta do this fucking thing. What do you have on for tonight, Ricky? What are you planning? Still got some fireworks left over. Aw, Ricky, don't be blasting off fireworks. Every fucking time you light something on fire, one of them goes crock it and burns something down. Yeah, but that's half the fun.

That's why you don't go to fireworks, you light off your own. Because then fucking shit can happen. Every time I go to the regular fireworks for the city, I'm like, fuck, please let something fucking blow up or somebody get bucked over or something. So you feel that the organized fireworks displays are too safe? I think a little bit. They should have one, even if it's fake.

It looks like an accident. It's way cool. It's like going to a fucking race and not seeing it crash. It sucks. So you'd like to see someone in one of those fire sets? I don't want anyone to get hurt. They almost get hurt or they almost get burnt or something fucking catches on fire or, you know, destroy somebody's truck.

Like fucking banging off, like, you know, telephone poles around people. Yeah, a ricochet action.

Yeah, ricocheting. Yeah, it's not bad. Then you could say, fuck, I was there when that fucking happened.

That was awesome. Yeah, normal fireworks, they suck. It's like, hey, how were the fireworks? Eh,

same as last year. Whereas it'd be like, hey, how were the fireworks? Eh, same as last year. Whereas it'd be like, hey, how were the fireworks? Oh, my fuck, man. They fucked up. It was wicked. One of them hit the bridge. Yeah, that would be cool.

I agree. How did we get talking about that now? My brain is fucked. Because we were talking about what you're going to do tonight. Oh, yeah. about what you're going to do tonight. Oh, yeah.

You said you're going to light off fucking fireworks. Speaking of fucking smart people. We weren't. No. The guy that turned the Hollywood sign into Hollywood, who I think is probably in the top five smartest people in the world to fucking come up with that, by the way. He turned himself in.

Zachary Fernandez. Fucking turned himself in. Zachary Fernandez. Fucking turned himself in. He shouldn't have. He was a legend. No. You know what? You know why he turned himself in? To become a legend?

Because you just fucking said his name. Yeah, that's why he turned himself in. Now he's famous. Now he's famous. But you got to admit, that sign's been there for at least, what, 20, 30 years. And no one's ever fucking... It's like, hey, 30 years, and no one's ever

fucking, it's like, hey, he's looking at it one day, it's like, because of his fucking IQs. Well, no, Ricky, I guarantee you thousands of other people thought of it. Nope. But nobody did it. So I'll give him that. He took the effort

to actually do it, but he's not the first person to ever think that could say Hollywood. How smart do you have to be to look at two fucking O's and go, I could change those into fucking E's. Not there. It's not that brilliant of a thing, man. I think it's smarter than what the fuck is the guy that's, he's really smart, but he's not very mobile.

Stephen Hawking? Yes. So you think the guy that came up with Hollywood is smarter than Stephen Hawking who... On a different level. Who talks about string theory and quantum physics. It's a different type of smart, but I think they're on the same fucking level. For him to look at that and say, I can do that and then I'm going to do it and do it, that's crazy.

That's the same as figuring out what a fucking black hole is. Using math. I bet maybe he wouldn't have thought of that one, right? I bet he fucking saw that and goes, fuck, there's a fucking smart son of a bitch. I can say unequivocally

that Stephen Hawking did not say that story and go, fuck that guy's smart. Wish I had a thought of that. He may have said something like, that's pretty cool. Oh, he's,

don't get me wrong, he's awesome and I think he is very smart. But I think that other guy, if he went to the right school, I guarantee you Stephen Hawking was not sitting there going,

fuck, I wish I hadn't been thinking about space-time continuum. I could have come up with that Hollywood sign idea. You know what? He's fucking smart as fuck. He probably did think of it. He just didn't get around to doing it. He's busy.

There's no way he wouldn't do something like that or probably a different thought. He fucking wouldn't. That wouldn't even cross his mind. Wish I could hop out of this chair and fucking spray paint two O's. Oh, I don't even think of spray painting. It was just a temporary brilliant thing.

That was the other smart part. It's like, he could have just did that. It's easy, but he's like, no, I'm going to just make this temporary. What did he do? Did he use plywood? Some kind of wrap or something, I think, maybe. Hmm.

So maybe I got that fucked up. I don't know. I don't know what he used. But he's fucking smart. So the charges would probably be a little less because he didn't paint the fucking thing. I don't think he'd get that. The judge would be like,

See, that's smart. That is smart. I'm not going to fuck up you because if you get the charges, you won't be able to do fuck all. But you need to get the fuck to school and start building that brain. Get to school and start building that brain. Get to school and start building that brain.

If the judge is smart, he'd pay for the fucking thing. Why would the judge give a fuck? You'd probably just appreciate the fucking level the guy's on. It's, but... No question, he'd be the smartest person in the courtroom. You are probably the only person in the world that thinks that this guy is a fucking genius I bet you I'm not The only person I bet you it's being talked about all over the fucking world by smart people

Yeah, but they're not saying that guy's fucking a genius They're saying he could be, for sure, based on seeing that He changed two fucking letters, Ricky Right Brilliant Holy fuck, Ricky You know what? Ricky. Right. Brilliant. Holy fuck, Ricky. You know what? I'm going to change some letters and some words and just blow your mind.

What else are we doing? When are we starting to play the games in the 2000s and the 17s? I'm working on it. Alright, we've got to think of some games. I'm going to come up with a brand new game. I'm willing to play anybody. I'm working on one right now called Stick the Pickle.

Stick the Pickle? Stick the Pickle. You got a stick in your mouth and you got to puncture it through a pickle? No, Ricky. We played a game like that when we were kids, but I forget what it was called. That wasn't called Stick the Pickle. Oh, no, it was Bobbing for Apples. How did you, like, that's a huge fuck-up.

Bobbing for Apples, you don't have a stick in your mouth and you're trying to stab pickles fuck up Bob for apples You don't have a stick In your mouth And you're trying To stab pickles Yeah no It's way off Yeah it's fucked Holy fuck man

Remember how good Your mother was At bobbing for apples Remember she could Just take two whole apples I was waiting for that one She had big horse teeth Real fucking nice

Yeah She could eat a apple through a Venetian blind. Yeah, that's real funny. Get it? Not really. Yeah. What does it mean? Huh? What's going on?

Nothing. Is that it? Starting to get on the lecker here. Well, get on the lecker. Yeah, man. I'm done with this fucking thing. Maybe no nap and maybe more drink. Yeah, don't nap, Rick. get on the lecker here. Well, get on the lecker. I'm done with this fucking thing.

Maybe no nap and maybe more drink. Yeah, don't nap, Ricky. Let's get right on that lecker. Let's go down to the bar and get some drinks. Can you pass me one of those little awesome bars? Where? They're miniature awesome bars. Yeah, they suck.

They're fucking good, man. What are they? I can't say the name because they're not sponsored, but instead of an awesome bar, it would be a... Remember the superhero Awesome Woman? Yeah. The what? You said her name and put it in front of a bar. Yeah.

That's what these are. Those are fantastic. Yeah, they're good. front of a bar. Yeah. That's what these are. Those are fantastic. Yeah, they're good. Some might say they're wonderful. This one. Very good. See that, Ricky? I'm going to take a couple of those with me, actually.

You're going to lose that wrist purse, man. Wrist purses are the fucking... That's what's cool in 2017. Ricky, you're going to jam chocolates in your wrist purse. Oh, fuck, and there's still some peanuts in there. I wonder what's going to happen. What do you mean, what's going to happen? They're going to mess each other up and turn into a fucking O'Henry or something?

That's how fucking the peanut butter cups were created. By fucking experiments like this, it went bad. Maybe if you were to smash it. That might be... That would work. I'm creating magic here, my friends. fucking experiments like this that went bad. Maybe if you were to smash it, that might be, that might, that would work. I'm creating magic here, my friends.

Holy fuck, you're, you are fucked, Ricky. Maybe I should throw a carrot on there, too. You know what? Also, last week,

I just realized. What? Last week was Friday the 13th. No, it wasn't. Yes, it was. It couldn't have been. We didn't even talk about it. We couldn't even talk about Jason Voorhees.

We always fucking celebrate that like crazy. I know. Who fucked that up? I don't know. You were high. How could it have been, though? Today's the 20th. Yeah, seven days ago.

So it would have been the 14th. No. I knew about it, but I didn't want to talk about fucking Jason for a half hour. Jason Bourne? Jason Bourne? No, it was Friday the 13th, Ricky. Man, what a fuck-up. We could have got all dressed up.

I know. I would have dressed up as Jason, for fuck's sakes. Fucking. He ruined my life. Could have went crazy. He fucking ruined my life. Fuck him, man. He scared the fuck out of you. I couldn't. He ruined my life. Couldn't have went crazy. He fucking ruined my life. You were fucked, man.

He scared the fuck out of you. I couldn't. I didn't sleep. I didn't sleep for two fucking years. After I saw that movie, I did not have a proper sleep one night for two years because of that cocksucker. Did he ever get you? No.

I eventually realized he was just a guy in a suit, but fuck. It took a long time to realize that. He scared the piss out of me and the Bigfoot on Steve Austin. He was the other one that fucking ruined my life. What'd you have dreams about with him? Just him getting me, coming after me. Bigfoot, what was that, robot thing? That scared the fuck out of you.

What robot thing? From Buck Rogers? The Bigfoot was a robot. No, but the other thing, the, you know, grounded. Tiggy from Buck Rogers? The Bigfoot was a robot. No, but the other thing, the, you know, Tiggie from Buck Rogers. No, it was a fucking... Tiggie? What was his name? Tweaky.

Tweaky. Tweaky. He wasn't scary. Biddy, biddy, biddy, hiya, Buck. I didn't like the way he talked. Yeah, he drove me nuts. Biddy, biddy, biddy, that guy. I had to punch him right in the fucking head.

Biddy, biddy, biddy, blow me, Buck. That was an episode that never aired. Biddy, bitty, bitty. Blow me, buck. That was an episode that never aired. Bitty, bitty, bitty. Blow me, buck. All right, I'm going to get you out, boys. Where are you going? I'm going to go to the trailer. Oh, my God.

You know what? What? Game changer. What? What? Some of the salted caramel powder mixed with the awesome bar. My fuck, it's good. So you actually had a reaction inside the wrist purse. And it is fucking unbelievable.

So now, awesome bar needs to come out with, what was those peanuts called you had? Salted caramel. Salted caramel. Awesome Bar. Bits. You can get that at trailerparkboysmerch.com. I will. The salted caramel Awesome Bar will be for sale.

If you don't see them, buy something else. Who were we brought to you by? Trailerparkboysmerchman.com. He just said it. And? Salted caramel awesome bar. Yeah, exactly. Check it out. Merch store. Buy something. I don't know if I can keep drinking, but I'm gonna try.

I think you're gonna keep drinking. Pussy. Let's go. Let's do this. Get a get up and move around. Pussy this. Let's go get high again. See you everybody. Cheers everybody time to get drunk Fuck off