Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - TPB in Quarantine - Episode 7

Episode Date: May 18, 2020

Spring's in the f**king air, the stolen lobsters are in the pot, and the Boys are looking forward to getting out of this c*cksucker of a lockdown! Find out why Ricky's been thinking too hard about llamas, and Bubbles has the latest sh*tty gossip from Sunnyvale. Also: Is Julian about to dive into the dark web?

Boys! Check it out boys! How's it going? Check it out boys! Look at the stuff! The new stuff! It's kind of cool man, how'd you do all this? Look at this boys! Look at that! Putting things right in front of you, Ricky! Oh man, I wish I could grab that, man I can't! Yeah man, don't tease me like that!

Here Julian, have a liquor drink! Don't tease me like that. Here, Julian, have a liquor drink. Don't tease me like that, bubs. Okay, boys, you ready for this? Hey, Ricky, you know how your TV hasn't worked in months? Yeah. Watch this. Watch this. What?

How'd you do that? I've been watching kitty kitty videos on the tv pretty decent right i feel like i'm there i know it's a lot better like things are starting to look you know things are starting to look up here i think i'm gonna be able to come home soon man they're saying they're starting to lose some shit and I'm pumped. I'm coming home. Well, maybe not just quite yet, Ricky, but it is getting, starting to look better.

Like things are getting better. If not before, I'm coming home on 5-20. Make up for 4-20, which went to shit. Yes, that's a good idea. 5-20. It's been postponed by a month. I think so. You gotta make it happen. I like Yes. That's a good idea. 520. It's been postponed by a month. I think so. You got to make it happen.

I like May. May's a good fucking month. What the fuck is... What do you like about May, Julian? Well, it's almost summer, man. It's the time to, you know, all the animals... Everybody wants to get her going in May, okay? Lots of people are banging.

Animals are banging. Everything's banging. Everybody's drinking. Having a good time. Waiting for summer, man. Down with it. It rhymes with something that you are, too, which is kind of neat. What is that, Ricky? Yeah, what is that, Rick?

What rhymes with May? Just a word that means happy. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Sure does. We know what the fuck you're talking about, Ricky. Jesus, man.

What are you guys doing? What are you doing? Am I allowed to tell the truth or no? Absolutely. Ricky, what's going on i may or may not have borrowed a rowboat and went out and i wouldn't say i poached lobsters but i took a couple out of a trap and didn't put them back so whatever you call that it's called poaching lobsters man yeah that's pretty much what it's called what What a Mother's Day feast I had.

Oh, my God. Three, like, two and a half pounders. Oh, God. I was so full. Oh, it was amazing. Jesus, Murphy. So you stole somebody's fucking hard-earned lobsters? You know what?

I'll find out when this is all done. I'm going to find out who owned them, and I will go, and I will give the money or dope or something so I don't feel right about doing it. But, you know, what am I supposed to do? Starve to death? I can't do bugs and shit. I will, man. I don't feel right about that. You're not going to go find

these people, these fishermen, and fucking give them some money or dope or something. That's not going to happen. I think I have to. I feel bad because you know they're trying to make a living working their asses off unless i mean by me taking out those three lobster he went back in the water that three more might have went in so it may not have made any difference at all but i'll find out they're not going to be able to tell man i've

poached lobsters for quite a bit and uh it is tough work but you're not going to be able to tell, man. I've poached lobsters for quite a bit. And it is tough work. But you're not going to be like, holy fuck, somebody stole my lobsters. I don't know, man. So you didn't feel bad? No. Fuck it. The creature's in the ocean for everybody, man. How can you say that's mine?

The ones that come in this trap are mine. Fuck you. Hands down, that was the best meal I've had since I've been in the woods. I didn't even have butter. Didn't even need butter, man. They were good. Oh,

you can't eat a fucking lobster without butter. In my opinion. Well, when you're living in the goddamn woods and it rusted out old shit box, you can't. Hey, look at this voice. Do you,

do you miss this guy? What is it? You cocksucker. Oh yeah. I forgot about those goddamn things. Ding dong. Yeah, I do miss it, man.

Oh, Ricky, here's your... Makes me think of you guys. Here's your ultimate survival worst case scenario book. Ricky, do you want me to read you one? Sure, man.

Pick a good one. Is there one there about surviving in the woods? Oh, Jesus, yes. Maybe here. I'll look it up. You guys keep talking. I'll see if there's a good surviving in the woods one here. Did you hear about that little cunt that got caught doing

like 305 kilometers an hour in Toronto? Jesus Christ. Yeah, man. That's pretty quick. It's 180 miles an hour. That's pretty fast on a highway for a teenager. That's pretty quick. It's 180 miles an hour. That's pretty fast on a highway for a teenager. It's on a highway for a teenager, yeah.

He said he was quite comfortable. He said he was quite comfortable doing those speeds. What kind of a fucking car was he in going 180 miles an hour? I think it was a Mercedes or something. It would have to be because I think all the North American cars have governors on them, don't they? Jesus, Murphy, that's fast.

That's great. That's nice car fucking speeds. Yeah. Yeah, but most people that have nice cars like that will go 300 kilometers an hour. No problem, man. It's not a big deal. If you're on a highway, right? There's no way that a cop car can go that fast.

Like, why did he stop? Well, Ricky, he's probably, you know, getting a little nervous. You get a little speed wobble going at that fucking speed and you'll know it. Trapped in the car, no. You're not trapped in your car. No, not yet. Car maneuvering, boats, Arctic, cold weather. Cold weather. It's not really that cold, though, not yet. Car maneuvering, boats, Arctic, cold weather. Cold weather.

It's not really that cold, though, bubs. No, I guess not. Can I eat it? How to set animal traps, Ricky. Can I eat it might be good. Can I eat it? This is how to set animal traps. What else do we got?

Is the can I eat it about food or is it about women? Ricky. It's probably like squirrels, man. Squirrels are cool to eat. They are cool to eat, right? They're not great. I'm not going to lie. Making fire?

Ricky, do you know how to make a fire? I'm very good at making a fire. Okay. He tells you how to do that without matches. Camping. How to avoid an attack. How to not get fucked by a bear. That's not in there, is it? No.

How to pick up Julian's mom is so. Yeah, funny. You just dangle your wiener out the window, it says. How to check out Julian's mom is so Yeah funny You're staying go. You know the window it says Rick you just got it. You got to get on the TV that who are the survival guys? There's like Bear Grylls that guy that fucking English guy X seal or whatever the fuck he was That guy was alive The survivor dude, what's his name survivor man?

Survivor dude The survivor dude What's his name? Survivor man? What was that? As if you don't fucking know Because you are in love with Survivor man Well fucking shit I am You basically Want to do it with Survivor man

And you've said that in the past Just because you think someone's cool Because they got Survivor Fucking techniques and shit And they're smart that way Doesn't mean I want to fucking like, ump them or something. How to leave a trail.

Survivor man. How to leave a trail for rescuers if lost in the wilderness. No. I don't really want anybody to find me. Unless they got food and drugs, fuck off. Jungle. How to build a jungle shelter. How to escape from a mountain lion.

Get his belly and become friends with him. That's pretty much how you do it. Bullshit. No, you don't. The desert. Well, that whole chapter was the natural world, so. Okay. Okay.

So, Bob, what have you been doing lately? Have you been leaving your fucking shed? What's going on? Yes, I've been leaving my shed I take my kitties for walks I've been down to the lake a few times I've been fishing I went fishing with my kitties

Two kitties came fishing with me Yeah, I went fishing too Caught a nice little trout What did you use for a rod, Ricky? A little stick and some line and a worm. And the little fucker chomped right onto it and I yanked him out before he could decide he didn't want to do that. Tackled him, punched him, and then I ate him.

You punched a trout? Oh, I didn't want him to suffer. I didn't have a knife. You don't got to punch the fucking, you don't punch a trout, really. I didn't, I didn't want him to suffer. I didn't have a knife. You don't got to punch the fucking, you don't punch a trout, really. I didn't, I didn't feel good about it. I'm not going to lie, but what do you do? I don't like things to suffer. Unless it's, you know, a bully or Corey or Jacob.

Jesus, Murphy. Remember that time, that time you caught that big fucking eel down at the fucking creek there it's huge and there was that woman what was her name Mrs. Silver or something she was a bit of a hag of course the eel died so we gutted it

kind of thing and put it all right on her doorstep and she came out and stepped in it that was a bit of fuck man what the fuck are you talking about I don't remember that was I there I don't remember it either and put it all right on her doorstep, and she came out and stepped in it. That was a bit of fuck, man. What the fuck are you talking about? I don't remember that. Was I there? I don't remember it either.

Oh, I did. It did happen. It did happen. We were fucked up. But I don't know. Maybe that was the days that we experimented in puff and glue that one time. Yeah, we went through a weird phase. There's lots of weird phases, and I'm going through a phase now Being like

You know a lot of people can fucking understand What prison's like right now During this quarantine You know what I mean Especially if you're by yourself It's kind of like this I remember the time we caught the eel And Ricky put it down his pants

He thought it was dead and it wasn't And it bit him on his wiener I remember that. I don't remember that at all. That must have hurt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you stabbed it with a fucking fork. The thing died. We cut it up and threw it on Mrs. Silver's fucking doorstep.

Played a little knock on, what is it? Knock on ginger or whatever the fuck it's called. Nicky Nicky Knock. Nicky Nicky Nine Door. Nicky Nicky Nine Door. Nicky Nicky Nine Door we used to call it. I just remember Bob saying that it was

what calamari was made out of. So we cut it into little rings and it was disgusting. That's not what calamari is made out of. I might have thought that back then. You tricked me. We were using a bow and arrow to get frogs and fish. That was kind of cool. We were shooting mudsuckers and frogs with bows and arrows. I could try that I know. You tricked me. We were using a bow and arrow to get frogs and fish. That was kind of cool. We were shooting mudsuckers and frogs with bows and arrows.

I could try that, I guess. Yeah. Sounds like fun. Hey, Julian. Hey, Julian. Here, have a drink. What? Man, you got to stop teasing me with this liquor, Bob.

Suck. Suck it, man. There's a delay here, Bob. So it's hard for me to fucking do this. Yeah, delay, man. Too much of a delay. Bob, so it's hard for me to fucking do this. Yeah, delay, man. Too much of a delay. So, what do you guys, what do you think, Bob? Is this thing

getting any better or what? Are we going to be able to come home soon? I'll just tell you what's going on in the world of the coronavirus. Yeah. It's spreading through the fucking White House. Don't know if you saw that or not,

but a bunch of the vice president's people got it and a bunch of the Secret Service have it. Holy shit. I don't know. They're telling people to go back to work, but they don't seem to be able to handle the cocksucker themselves. So I don't know. I don't know what's going to happen.

It's a little bit scary if you ask me. I'm not sure that we're ready to be going back to work and shit yeah i mean i don't like to work as it is but it seems a little soon a little bit soon because what could happen is you know all the fucking staying at home everybody did over the past while it's gonna fucking mean jack shit. Be for nothing. If we have to do this again, I am going to snap. Yeah. Well, it might happen. I heard

that they found some annelie bodies in the Lallama. Heard that too, yes. I heard that too. Was it a llama or was it something else? It was a llama. A llama.

It's just llama, Ricky. Why is it two L's? It's a good question. I have no fucking idea. Must have been discovered by a guy that stuttered. The llama. What do you want to call this thing? How about llama?

Ricky. Maybe. I don't know. I'm just guessing. Why the fuck else would it have two L's in its name? It's dumb. So, Ricky, tell me something. When you see a fucked up word like La Lama, right,

how long do you actually think about it? Did you sit there for hours and think about what the fuck is this all about? You know what I mean? I'm going to be honest. Last night when I saw this on my phone, it kept me up all night. And I thought about Lil Llama and why it had two L's pretty much until right now. It just makes no sense to me.

And it's things like that that make me not want to ever get learned or go to school or do anything like that. Because it's shit like this that just proves that how dumb it is. You've been thinking about it non-stop. You know, the odd thing will pop into my mind. I'll see a fly fly by and I'll be like, oh, there's a fly. But then I go right back to why the two L's?

Not two F's and fly. Just, you can't get it out of your head. Okay, I think they should change it. I don't know why they've left it. Somebody should have changed this 100 years ago. Or renamed the animal. Something with a normal name.

We're going to solve this problem, Rick. Anytime this ever happens to you again, give Bubbles a call. Don't stay up all fucking night and day thinking about it, man. Yes, you can give me a call anytime, Ricky. If you're stuck know if you're stuck on something for more than if you're thinking about one thing for more than six hours you

probably should give me a ring well i mean it got a little crazy around 3 a.m because i don't know i was just really upset that i don't have a knife and then i was like knife yeah there's another goddamn word with a letter it doesn't need. And then I was like, it started making me go psycho. I'm like, okay, I'm going psycho. There's another word with a letter it doesn't need. Like, it's just, when's it going to stop? Why do they keep coming up with these words with letters that are silent

that don't do anything? Phone. Why is phone not with an F? How do you get a P? Is it a P-N? Phone? P-N-O-N? No.

How do you spell phone? It's not with an F anyway. No, it's P-H-O-N-E, man. Phone. Right. But why does a P-H make a F sound? It's dumb. They should rewrite the whole goddamn dictionary, if you ask me,

so it makes sense to everybody. Then people wouldn't be so dumb. They'd be smart. Do you know what that would fucking entail, to do something like that, man? It just wouldn't be worth it. I bet if you did, people would be like, finally, someone that's smart rewrote the goddamn dumb dictionary

into words that make sense, letters that make sense. You can't just have it one way and then change it to something else. Like, they teach you what the letters sound like, then they throw a curveball like that at you. It just, as a child, it fucks you right up. That's why I didn't get learned that great at school. I don't think it's something that you should be giving this much thought to. I really don't. Jesus, Murphy.

I didn't know you were hung up on this stuff like this. I think Lallama is one of the worst. Two L's in a row. I mean... See? Now I'm going to be up all night again. Well... I don't know why you'd be up all night

Ricky, Jesus, Murphy You should take a stand and just fucking say the word you want The way you want Spell it the way you want, phone F-O-N-E, okay, spell it that way Just do it Maybe you gotta be the one to make the change, man Maybe I should rewrite the goddamn dictionary

And be famous Do it, fucking do it Be as famous as Dexter. Is it Dexter's Dictionary? Well, now it's going to be Ricky's. What the fuck is Dexter's Dictionary? It's the famous one, isn't it? I've never heard of it before.

Oh, no, it's Webber's. Webster's. Yeah, Webber's Webber's. Webster's. Webster's. Or Merriam's. Dexter was a serial killer, man. My God, that's a nice snap of liquor. That is a nice snap of liquor right there.

Killing me. I'm actually drinking my whiskey with Root Beer. Pop Shop Root Beer, man. It's not bad. You guys are killing me. It's not bad. Root Beer's not a good fucking mix, Julian, to have with whiskey, is it? Well, it's a lot better than fucking lime

Ricky or something like that man root beer is way better you wouldn't put rum in you wouldn't put anything in with lime well vodka and lime Ricky's a nice a nice drink lime cordial you only need a tiny bit of that I found out

yeah I'm saving the blackberry the blackberry or the black cherry I think that's going to be good, too. That's going to be a good one. Yeah. Yeah. Boys, so this is fucking... What? What?

No, man, go ahead. There's nothing. I'm just fucking... I can't stand not hanging out with you guys, man. It's starting to fucking bother me. No shit. And all these politicians say, oh, you got to stay home. You can't hang not hanging out with you guys, man. It's starting to fucking bother me. No shit. And all these politicians will say, oh, you got to stay home. You can't hang out with people.

And then fucking Doug Ford has his goddamn daughters over for little festivities on the weekend. Like, that's not fair. Why can he do it? We can't. He's going to do that, and I'm coming home. Yeah, it's a bit fucky. It is a bit fucky. But you know what? Once a week, once a week, I get to sit here in the virtual trailer with you guys.

And it's very, it's very calming to my nerves. Especially now that I got kiddie videos playing on the TV. I agree. It helps. But it's still like right now I'm looking over here and you're not there. So it's kind of a mind fuck. I'm not going to lie. looking over here and you're not there.

So it's kind of a mind-fuck. I'm not going to lie. Here, Ricky, pretend you're pointing your hand at the TV with a remote to turn it off. Okay. Okay. And turn it off. Quick.

A little bit of a delay, but yeah, it works. It's cool. No, there's no delay. As soon as you say click, it happens. It's just a delay on your end. Oh. Do it again. My phone is a piece of shit. Click.

I don't know. Did it work? I can't tell. It worked. I'm not looking at my screen. It worked. Turn it back on, though. Click.

So what the fuck's been going on with Randy these days he's still being a dick or what oh did he did I not talk to you since he shit himself no oh he shit himself boys holy fuck I saw him he was out cutting his grass

right and I could see him from the shed and he kept Jesus. Holy fuck. I saw him. He was out cutting his grass. Right. And I could see him from the shed. And he kept fucking reaching for his arse. But he wanted to get. He only had a few strips left. And he was dancing. And he was holding his arse. And he was cutting.

But he was up on his tiptoes. And he was trying to get the last strip. And I was watching him. And then he went in to turn the lawnmower off but when he did the switch it didn't turn off it kept running and he was trying to get it and he was holding his arse and he fucking shit himself

and it blasted out the top of his pants onto his back you stood there and watched that? well I was watching him out the window I thought he might just shit himself and try to hide it. But he shit himself with such force, it blasted out the top of his pants and it went halfway up his back. Oh, God, I would have thrown up.

You know what he did? He rolled in the fucking fresh cut grass to get it off him. He really is like a wild animal. Then he just had grass clippings and shit all over his back. He's like a wild shit beast. God, he's gross. Why wouldn't you get video

of this shit, man? You can make money off of videos like that these days. I don't want video of Randy shitting himself and rolling in the grass. I never thought to videotape it. There's fucking creepy fucks out there that'll watch anything, man. Speaking of that, how is your mom? Nailed you.

Fucking nailed you over the internet. Yeah, that was real funny, bubs. Listen, one thing I wanted to ask you both, bubs, because I don't know much about this shit, but I've been on the internet a lot lately, of course, because there's not anything else to do. What's this whole fucking dark web shit? People say, go to the dark web.

Dark web? It's like... That's pretty funny. That's pretty funny, crazy shit. The dark web. Wow. So picture this, Julian. The normal internet, picture the normal internet as just the surface of the ocean.

Right? All right. All right. And everything you know about the internet and everything you look up, like YouTube and even, you know, your normal pornography that you're looking at a lot. Just anything that you search, that's's just picture that just laying on the surface of the ocean and the dark web the dark web is everything that's below that the whole fucking ocean right to the floor all the weird shit the weird monsters and things floating around underneath that you don't see by just looking at the surface. That's the best analogy I can use for that.

Do normal people go on it? What do you do? Is it... No, I mean it's where you find crazy shit. It's where you find illegal things and you hire hitmen and you buy

fucking organs. You can buy somebody's liver or, you know, really dark, weird shit. So I don't think you want to be fucking around on the dark web. Next thing you know, you hired a hit man.

No, no, no. And I'm not like, what about stolen shit? I want to sell stolen stuff. Oh yeah. Absolutely.

You can definitely sell good for drug dealers too. Is there like a, like a fucking dark dark web gg out there and the dark web that i can fucking get on or i imagine there's a dark web gg type thing oh yeah yeah there would be for sure dark web craigslist what about a dark web like fucking ebay that probably doesn't exist, right? There must be something like that. There's got to be something like that. I could be selling shit right now. What are you going to sell? Your body?

No, not my fucking body, Ricky. I'm talking like there's nice TVs in this place. There's computers. There's all kinds of shit, man. Some of those Royal Dalton things. All kinds of shit, man man I think you just sell it Yeah but I don't want

I don't know man The cops aren't even working right now I don't think They're not? They gotta be No I think they're just off They're home self isolating I think Julian there's a dark web There's a dark web weightlifting competition

that you might be interested in. Yeah, why would I be interested in that? Well, it happens every year. It's all dark web people get together, and they get their shirts off, and they get oiled up and lift weights and look at each other's muscles. You might be interested in doing that.

Like, why would you fucking... Yeah, but why would I like it? Just because you've got... Well, I mean, I couldn't participate because I've got puny little arms. You know, but whereas you've got big fucking pythons,

you could probably show up at the Dark Web event and make some friends. I'm not gonna fucking go on the dark web onto a big pops there's got to be a way of making money that's all i'm saying i'm sitting around here doing nothing there's got to be a way of making money dark web it is i'm going on there i'm gonna find an ebay or whatever the fuck i'm gonna find i'm selling shit anybody out there want to buy something? I've got some good prices. I'm going to try to make up a website on... What's those websites? What's GoDaddy? Get your daddy. No, get

your daddy. GoDaddy is the one. So can I use GoDaddy on the dark web? No. I don't know. I've never been on the dark web, just so you're aware. I just know what it is, but I don't know even how to... You gotta know computers to even access

the fucking thing. You can't just... Yeah, because they're not trying to be found. They're trying to be not found. Okay, so maybe you can figure this out for me, Bubz. Well, I don't want to go snooping around on the fucking dark web. That's the thing. Because that's when the police come, hey, I noticed

you were browsing Hitman on the fucking internet. I'm not going to be browsing Hitman. Why the fuck would I want a Hitman for? No, that's what's going to happen to me if I start noodling around trying to figure out the dark web. Next thing I got the fucking RCMP on my doorstep. Butts, just send me a

fucking link, okay, please? Is it true you can only use it at night or is that just a rumor? I don't think, I've never heard that, Ricky. Why would you true you can only use it at night, or is that just a rumor? I don't think. I've never heard that, Ricky. Why would you only be able to use it at night? Because that's when it's dark. No, it's not dark. It doesn't mean

because it's dark out. It means dark, like weird, dark stuff. Oh, like evil stuff. Like evil shit. Like evil can evil, basically. Okay. Did you get. Like evil Knievel, basically. Okay. Did you get that video I sent you, Bubz, about the murder hornets thing? I did see the thing about the murder hornets, Ricky.

Jesus. Oh, my God. That guy holds it on his arm and lets it sting him. Oh, God. It looks like it hurt. Oh, it looks unbelievable. Unbelievable. Did you see the fucking

the welt that swelled up on his arm? But why would he do that? Well, because he's crazy, I think. I would say. I heard they can sting you more than once, too. They can sting you like multiple times, right? That's the fucking shitty part of it.

Murder hornets, yes, they can like a regular hornet can sting you more than once. Why couldn't a murder hornet? Don't drive around with your hand out the window. You know what I'm saying? That's when it can happen. There's no murder hornets around here yet. No.

I think it's too cold, isn't it? Well, I don't think they're here yet. I don't think they've flown this far. They're out in B.C. right now. I heard they're in B.C. Down in the States, in Washington or somewhere. That's out all the way on the West Coast. Hopefully they stay on the fucking West Coast.

Little pricks. I do not need a fucking murder hornet. You hear about that guy that found 100,000 bees living in his attic? That's a lot, man. That would suck. 100,000 bees? Yeah bees living in his attic? That's a lot, man. That would suck. 100,000 bees? Yeah, living in his attic. I think he went up to do some

renovations or check his roof or something. 100,000 little bastards. Jesus, Murphy, that's a fucking lot of bees to have in your attic. Yeah, how would you not realize that? I must hear some little low hum late at night. You would think so. Oh, you'd hear them, man. yeah how would you not realize that must hear some little low hum

late at night you would think so you'd hear them man 150,000 wings flapping that's a lot and you can also hear carpenter ants when we've got enough of them you can hear them man

eating your fucking house you can't hear them smacking their they don't have lips first of all no you can hear them smacking their... They don't have lips, first of all. No, you can hear them smacking their lips. You can. You can. Look it up. Look it up on the fucking internet. You can hear carpenter ants smacking their lips, can you? No, not their lips.

You can hear them fucking eating through your fucking two-by-fours in your wall, man. No, you fucking can't. I swear to fuck you can. No, you can't. No, you can't. Here, have a drink. Check it out. Have a drink.

Have a drink. I had carpenter ants. There's about fucking 50,000 of them. Yeah, thanks, Bob. Jesus, man. That's a lot. And you can hear them eating the fucking wood in the walls, man. I think I do remember hearing them eat your trailer, Perry.

Yeah. It's like... Gross. It's your trailer, Perry. Yeah. It's like, gross. It's fucking disgusting, little fuckers. What's the sound they make? I want to gas them. What's the sound? You know what, you bubs? Don't put me in the close-up.

It's like that. Oh, you know what, Julian? I'm going to, so my mission this week next week is to figure out how to use source tracking what the fuck what does that mean once I figure out

how to use the source tracker I'm gonna be able to pick a region of the screen so let's just say I picked your lips for instance as the region and then I could just

tack any source I want to that area let's just say a picture of somebody's wiener and no matter where you move your head on the screen that wiener is going to stay hooked to your lips.

All right, you just got to remember something, Bubz. What? If wieners start sticking to my fucking lips, there's a little red button on my fucking phone that I'm pressing. Put the X on it. No, you're not allowed. No, you're not allowed hanging up. When that happens, that's a big, go fuck yourself. No, you're not allowed hanging up when that happens that's a big go fuck yourself no

not allowed hanging up you got to figure a different way out of it that's the rules i'm not fucking playing tag with a fucking wiener i'm just saying if i figure out how to work it it's going to be very cool though because because what you say say i you know attached it you, I put a little bit of color on my hand and said, track that. I could take footage of a little campfire burning and I could do this, like as if I'm holding a campfire in my hand. Cool. You could do things, you know, make it look like you're doing magic. So that's what

I'm going to work on. I'm going to try to figure out how to use the tracking system. That's cool, man. And you also told everybody what you're doing. You could have just surprised people and all of a sudden have a fucking fire in your hand. There's a lot more to it than that, baby.

Don't worry. People will be fucking surprised and shocked when they see what I'm able to do. Especially when there's a big wiener stuck right to your lips. Yeah, have fun doing Perk After Dark without me, bud. Because I will fucking end the call.

You know what? Well, I'll just take you. I'll just take this. Dirk without me, bud, because I will fucking end the call. You know what? I'll just take you. I'll just take this 40 to you, and I'll just lay you back in. You won't even need to be on the phone. I'll just lay you back in, and it's still going to track your lips around. Why do you want to put a fucking wiener

on my fucking lips anyway? Why? I'm not. It'll probably take you hours and hours to figure out how to fucking do it, and that's what you want to do. You want to put a wiener on my lips? No, I just use that as an example, but I might, I might do different things.

You know, I might... There's all kinds of possibilities I could use that little trick for. Why don't you put a wiener on Ricky's fucking lips? Oh, maybe I will. Why don't you put a wiener on Ricky's fucking lips? Oh, maybe I will. I don't know. I might put something on Ricky. Oh, you know what I could

do, Ricky? You know what I could do? If you just put a little bit of color on your bottom lip, like a little blue or something that I could track, I could just hook a big joint to your lip, no matter where you turned your head or you're talking, there'd be a big joint to your lip No matter where you turned your head Or you're talking there would be a big joint Sticking off your lip

Just to tease me Well yeah It would probably tease you a little bit wouldn't it I guess we could try it though It would be kind of cool How long have we been on here boys I have no idea I don't even know man I need to go find some dinner

Yeah I'm starting to get a little I need some ice in my. I need to go find some dinner. Yeah, I'm starting to get a little... I need some ice in my liquor drink. I got to go get some ice and get fired up. All right, boys. Well, it's good talking to you guys. I love

talking to you guys, pretending like I'm sitting in the trailer. It feels nice. It feels nice. Feels nice on my bones. Yeah. Well, we miss you, man. I miss you guys. Yeah.

I miss you guys. Love you guys. You know what, boys? Eventually, we're going to be able to be sitting back in the trailer. How fun is that going to be to be able to pass you a liquor drink or, you know? That's going to be awesome. We're going to have a big, big party that day. We're going to have a big fucking, like a big. When we're back at the real table, in the real trailer,

we're going to have to have a big fucking dirty chicken party, boys. Yeah. I'm down. I'm totally down. Donair's chicken, fucking pizza. Donair chicken pizza poutine party. Donair chicken pizza poutine.

Holy fuck is it ever going to be good. I'm making my mouth water right now. We should invite Randy maybe. Yes, we'll invite Randy. I think we should invite Randy. Absolutely. It's been a long time since I was able to abuse somebody properly. You know what I mean?

I can call you guys dicks or whatever, but Randy, just fucking go full tilt on him. Yeah, Randy shitting himself is something you've got to see. I hate to say it because I don't like him and he stinks, but I'm actually, I don't know, I guess I miss him a little bit. I miss everybody right now. It's fucked. Yeah, I do too, Ricky. I do too. It's bullshit. Well, all we can do is

keep fucking doing this bullshit. But you know what? People are, you know, the swearing at people. Say hi to the swearing at people. They're still tuning in. Hello, swearing at people. Thanks for watching. I hope we're not say hi to the SwearNet people they're still tuning in hello SwearNet people thanks for watching I hope we're not boring the fuck out of them

but I mean there's nothing else to do you might as well watch us just sitting around fucking talking about nothing exactly right there's probably not too many people talking about putting fucking like cyber wieners on their friends faces faces and shit like you are.

So it's a bit different. Kind of weird. Maybe. It could be somebody else with advanced technology that has the ability to do that. You don't know. Yeah, most people like that are nerds, though, that would never do that, okay? Well, I'm proud to be a fucking nerd, actually. You're special, bubs.

Yeah. All right, guys, I got to get the fuck out of here. All right, say bye. Okay, boys. All right. Later, fuckers. Cheers. Later.

See you, Ricky. See you, everybody. See you next week. Do-do-do-do-do.