Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - A Very Juicy Christmas w/ Jessie Johnson

Episode Date: December 20, 2022

Thank you to our Sponsors: Athletic Greens - Go to https://athleticgreens.com/tuesday to get a free 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs with your first purchaseBetterHelp - Go to https://betterhelp.com/trashtuesday today to get 10% off your first monthRocketMoney - Cancel unnecessary subscriptions with Rocket Money at https://rocketmoney.com/trashtuesdayNextEvo -  Get up to 25% off subscription orders of $40 or more at https://nextevo.com/podcast promo code trashtuesday More Jessie "Jetski" “Juicy” JohnsonBad Friends Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@BadFriendsInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/Website: https://www.jetskijohnson.com/ Subscribe! https://bit.ly/HitOurButtonsOfficial Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/2QDAi8XTrash Tuesday Podcast iTunes Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TrashTuesdayPodTrash Tuesday Podcast Spotify Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TTPodAudioTrash Tuesday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday 0:00 Santa Jetski Juicy Jessie Johnson Claus11:23 OnlyHams16:28 The Whitney Cummings Roast19:39 Juicy Johnson Wants Towels for Christmas30:45 The Scented Candle33:26 Pauly Shore & The Crustys34:32 Pet Fish & Pet Turtles36:20 Accusing Someone Of Stealing From You / The Girl That Stole From Annie42:58 Juicy Johnson’s Wiccan Christmas45:59 Juicy Johnson on People Hating Your Success47:34 Men with Girl Hips49:37 Carlos’ Squeaky Boots & The Urban Dictionary Definition of Manorexic 53:48 Smoking is Bad but It Still Looks Cool55:40 Annie Comments on the Trash Tuesday Christmas Decorations57:31 Is Tim Dillon Right About Money Fixing Everything?59:30 Getting Stopped and Searched by Cops1:04:36 Sosie Bacon’s Bedroom Advice For Khalyla 1:06:51 Guys with Two Ds & Women with Two Vs1:15:48 Substances That Are Bad for Us1:24:23 Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino Are Drowning. Who Does Juicy Choose to Save? Listen to our other Podcasts: TigerBelly - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/tigerbelly/id1041201977 My Pleasure - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/my-pleasure/id1494518220 AnnieWood - https://www.youtube.com/annielederman Follow Us: Khalyla Kuhn - https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk Annie Lederman - https://www.instagram.com/annielederman Esther Povitsky - https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster Produced by: 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: Pete Forthun & Carlos Herrera Editor: Bryce Hallock

After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one. Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel.

George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls. And the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at $15 a month. And all plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. That is such a steal. To get this new customer

offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just $15 a month, go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. That's mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month at mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes. On unlimited plan, additional taxes, fees and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. And as the world's largest therapy service, BetterHelp has matched 3 million people with professionally licensed and vetted therapists available 100% online. Plus it's affordable. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to match with a therapist. If things aren't clicking, you can easily switch to a new therapist anytime. It couldn't be simpler. No waiting rooms, no traffic, no endless searching for the right therapist. Learn more and save 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com slash Trash Tuesday.

That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash Trash Tuesday. Thank you to our sponsor, Rocket Money. Cancel unnecessary subscriptions with Rocket Money today. Go to RocketMoney.com slash trash Tuesday. Seriously, it could save you hundreds per year. That's rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday. Thank you to our sponsor, NextEvo. The holidays aren't all sleigh bells and mistletoe.

There are also airports, shopping malls, and dining tables crowded with people, some you're glad to only see once a year. Get smarter CBD from NextEvo Naturals and get up to 25% off subscription orders of $40 or more at NextEvo.com slash podcast promo code trash Tuesday. That's N-E-X-T-E-V-O.com slash podcast promo code trash Tuesday. Hi guys, I am going to be doing stand up in Phoenix, January 6th and 7th. You can get tickets at Esthereronice.com and also check out my solo show, My Pleasure. It's available wherever you listen to your podcasts.

What's up, ho-ho-hos? Merry Christmas. What a fun episode. What a blast I had. After enjoying this show, you can go over to Annie Wood, which premieres every Tuesday after Trash Tuesday at noon Pacific time. It's been so fun. It is my solo little dream project. Thank you guys so much for being a part of it. I can't wait to see you there. I also am on the road this New Year's. I am

at Wise Guys in Las Vegas, which is everything. I love gambling. I love partying and I love doing comedy. So come do that with with me that'll be January 30th and 31st and then you can see me at Burbank Flappers one night only January 7th in January I will also be in Wisconsin I will be in Florida in February and March and in Canada a lot more dates are being added so just go to annieletterman.com slash shows I can't believe we haven't met till now this is crazy yeah to be fair i don't leave home much i don't either unless i'm working well there you go yeah i don't like going never meant to cross no we were destined to and then i never go to the comedy store yeah have you ever seen me there i saw you there one time you and rudy went together

well before i worked on bad friends but i knew bobby a little bit and i saw you guys there and i was like oh cool they're here but i didn't meet you then oh right i think i remember it because it was like the only time i went there last year yeah you probably know exactly what night oh you guys have not met each other no can we intro juicy oh my god all right guys welcome my eagles jacket this is a trash tuesday it's it's green at this point the eagles have won what is it over yet no it's not over at this point the eagles are about to win um we are this is christmas day we are not pre-recording this and this is santa this is jew santa i don't know i like to oh i don't you santa do you always drink out of a mug of your own face i'm famous baby this is my body too uh

this is very similar to what i've the weight I've gained over this year. Annie, Santa knocked over the menorah pretty violently. Oh, Santa struck the menorah to the ground? Is he an anti-Semite? Is she an anti-Semite? They. Santa, by the way. They.

Santa is non-binary and not dealing with the fucking jews right now okay also a big kanye fan all right he's gonna get a lot of presents from me this year okay listen you know what kanye's gonna get his yeezy's contract back all right and guess who's gonna enjoy it the most the fucking jews that are mad at him let's be real um okay we have uh jesse juicy jetski johnson it's me it's been me the whole time. It's been her the whole time. Um, we have, you may know Kalilah.

She looks very similar to my favorite male comedian, Kyle. Kyle. You think? People have been saying that all week and I just don't see it. That's our best bit. I just had to say that's our best bit i just had to say that's our best there's kyle fan art i think we should do it i think kyle should come back on as a guest

wait maybe one time when you're not available kyle will be a guest i mean maybe i mean i want to meet him eventually i want to know who's taking my place oh my god what if you guys fucked i know you said you never hook up with a male comic again but i don't know kyle might be it strong opinions is the eyelash falling off my head no okay will you let me know yeah let me see it's it is down more than that one okay hang on hang on hang on i'm just going light eyelashed oh somebody coming with their natural hotties their thickies big naturals big naturals look at those fat you know why my lashes are long when i was a little girl and i i cut my eyelashes because i thought they were too long and my mom was like that mortified she looked like

that because she just i was like seven and i had the scissors so close to my eyes but i think they grew back really long i had a mean girl do that to me in high school she cut your eyelashes she was like because i was like i don't have any eyelashes because, you know, Asian. And she was like, oh, yeah, I know the solution to that. She's like, just trim your lashes. So I did. I already didn't have any. Oh, no.

And now I was completely eyeballed for like the like months out of the school year. And I was like, where's my. And then she laughed about it for like six months. I. Listen, guys, I was in high school with kalilah she was annoying shut up all your eyelashes i'll show you bitch and then i cut them off um what am i sitting on i must hash a group i was like what is this thing that feels so nice at my kukani my kukaloon um okay so i didn't get to bring presents this year

I don't know if you remember the presents I got last year We were in Hawaii I remember I still have it the calendar I got you a hot boy calendar Esther a hot girl calendar because she's a lesbo And then I got George just a calendar of Hawaii because he had brought his family And he didn't get to go do anything because his baby was like crying all day

So I brought him like This is the vacation you could have had uh that's a good burn aspirational calendar um and i just got me one so i could learn to count but um what i would have gotten this year is i would have gotten do you smoke weed a little bit not much anymore okay so i was i like the ideas of getting people presents that are like, seem nice, but are actually life ruining. So I wanted to get you a three foot bong because that is like so much. I had one once and my life spiraled out of control. But it's such a fun present to get.

You're like, oh my God, this is the greatest present. And then slowly everything falls away. Everything you've worked for is gone. You're alone. You're divorced. Your kids have left. You don't even have any. I greatest present and then slowly everything falls away everything you've worked for is gone you're alone you're divorced your kids have left you don't even have any i get married and then divorce yes that's what happened after we smoked um that one episode we recorded you got divorced no well i ended up smoking every day for like five straight days well i was considering giving it to you but i don't actually i work with you like i don't work with her that much so it's, you're my actual business partner. So I can't have you actually spiral up.

But with Jetski, it's like, she could miss a day or two on the road. I could have her not show up. The hair, honestly, the Mrs. Claus hair that goes with it. The bob. Doesn't she look like a barrister? Like one of those. A Berenstain Bears? A Berenstain. Is that what you mean? No, like in their lawyers, right? In England, they have to. doesn't she look like a barrister like one of those a beringstein bears a beringstein is that

what you mean no like in in their lawyers right in england they have to oh a barrister order order kind of look like a cartoon bear yeah you look like not like the ass wiping ones but like the ones from your childhood not charming yeah you don't seem charming um oh my gosh look yep that's me oh my god oh look at you so cute it's the curls and everything i do kind of like it's like if you want to get this sort of paycheck and have this sort of power as a lawyer you're gonna have to humiliate yourself by wearing this shitty wig why do they do that still i know it's like tradition but and why is it made actually out of yarn well the women have to wear it too which i find so silly like have you seen amal clooney in it no can you pull that up

and i know it's like respect to the institution and the tradition of it all but i just it's just funny it's so funny also get it to match but trick it to your roots well my question is like does it have to be blonde like if i was a brunette couldn't i ask to be like hey can i get like i want to be a ginger i want to be a ginger lawyer they don't trust those though gingers we know you're up to something it's more and it's not justice it's not justice just to create like uniform in the system is what it's saying on how stuff works that's ridiculous why was it why is it blonde is that your job do you think just looking up how stuff works.com

is that like one of your have you even bookmarked it never been on this site and i'm like hmm this site would really help me this could have helped you at your fucking job you're not admitting you have it's so funny wait can i just tell you it's so funny that i thought there was a bigger liquid death i go oh liquid death came out with like a 40 and it's just a medello i have a question what were the big drinks when you were in high school like for me it was like mad dog 2020 alizé was like top shelf for me um i think boone's farm was like very young fun soco yeah oh like alcohol yeah uh for loco my friend would go buy them for me and i would drink them alone in my room oh my god you were meant to have a three-foot bong look at you that was one of the first things i smoked out of and it was this girl was i think i was 16 and she was 21 and we worked at the same coffee shop and i thought she was so cool and i went to her house that's always the beginning of the end when

you look up to someone i looked up to her so much and she was like i went to her house and i was still in high school but and she i don't know why she was hanging out with me in the first place but she gave me this like three four foot bong i had to stand on the table to smoke it and she lit the bowl and i just was like the teamwork of it is kind of special you can't do it by yourself yeah so i was like oh cool i'm smoking with corinne and next thing i know i'm like in her bedroom just like rocking back and forth you're fired you never see her again she wasn't even my boss she was like at one point she's like you're gonna have to go home now oh that's so sad when it's like but you did this to me bitch i know one uh mother's day and i think i might have recycled

it several times for mother's day on instagram i um i like i put a hat on the top of my three foot bong and then i looked like i was putting its backpack on i was like go to school little one it's like one of my best mother's day is a big trigger for me because my i had to perform the heimlich maneuver on my own mother on mother's day as she was choking on rice i don't know why i heard heim and i thought there was gonna be a hymen involved so i'm actually this is actually a better story than where i thought it was going i had to do a hymenectomy on my mom her hymen had grown back i had to burst that cherry open i for sure cracked open my hymen before i lost my actual virginity because i ran

into i was biking high speeds around my neighborhood and i i drove right into a wall and i swear to god that bike seat impaled my pussy my young little pussy it's so weird you're saying this right now because the shorts i have to wear under this are so far up my pussy that it's cutters it's the most painful and it does feel like a hymen will be popped I mean yours is probably well past popped what bitch well past popped

Santa's going down wow Santa let me tell you the other present I was going to get you bitch I mean mine was too no I'm just kidding I have this fantasy that I'm going to meet a really nice man and we're going to start an only fans. And it's basically the slow progression. This is her beautiful story of him feeding me into morbid obesity.

And I'm going to call it only hams. I love the idea that not only is a good idea, but people will pay to watch this happen. Yeah. Yeah. I like the slow progression also another thing i want to do is i want to find the brother that i might have had sex with that whose dna we haven't really confirmed yet and i want him to do the dna test and in the event that he is in fact my brother i want to start an only fans guys here's the thing and but then we only

touch elbows there's no sex she's also gonna do one she's gonna do them with a stepbrother she did fuck but he's dead so it's gonna be called only sand because it's now ashes all right i love you um only hams is great and i call my fans hams i'm like oh my hams wait in the future or you do now this is a billion dollar wait i'm sorry do you have like a whole side hustle where you call your fans hams now or in the future are you telling us now look i cannot call anyone are you smoking weed you're being extra fun today i've been smoking weed every day this is great it saved esther too i'm like can't i become the one i become the opposite This is great. It saved Esther too.

I'm like, I become the opposite. I have faith in you. You're going to cycle back in too. I'm not trying to make $100 million. I made that deal with myself and I'm not going to make $100 million. You're not going to have fun until you make $100 million? No, I always have fun. I have fun all day. I'm not going to smoke weed again, which actually takes my fun.

Isn't that a fun bet? Yeah. That's good. It's healthy healthy it's crazy yeah healthy it's healthy to think you're gonna make a hundred million dollars yeah that's healthy you see do you have any only fans fantasies or like ideas oh yeah tell your idea to do a balloon animal somebody because telling me i oh you should start an old guam it's so gross it's always our friends it's like our guy friends yeah ew explain do you want to watch me figure myself like for 20 bucks in the bathroom what are you doing this guam felix at the story is like uh oh you got to get an only fans and i was like i don't want to get an only fans because you don't have to do sex stuff and i said people aren't going to pay to watch me do like balloon ass

because I'm goofy like guys comment below and she's fully clothed and she might be in the Santa thing if you're into it I don't like it would you? because it takes away from sex workers but I do like how Whitney did it. That's a good point Whitney did her roast on there but

it's because people are, I noticed with Whitney, who I love, that people just want to take her down no matter what. So they might as well pay for her content if they're just going to slam it. Yes.

Thank you. Now you look like an authority. Yes, Annie. You think, sorry, that your OnlyFans is going to take away from sex workers? You think the guys that are

like going to jerk off are gonna be like you know I only have ten dollars should I watch the girl fist herself or the girl make the dog with the fucking poodle I can't even make polluted animals maybe that's the journey

oh but Annie they might be both under the category of POV that's the journey oh but annie they might be both under the category of pov that's why but wait can i tell you speaking of pov your only hams what i like is you're like today i'm getting a hot beef injection but it really is just him injecting beef into your mouth it's actually beef like real ribeye yeah it's not a stiff one i've always really been into the idea of like feederism as sort of like this the ultimate fuck you where i'm like you know what like i'm ready to just let go of myself completely yeah i mean but could you do it kalilah deep throat's big hog but it's really a ham

it's just an actual like an actual penis of a pig i don't know it's your hands wait are do you like me because i hog the conversation i'm really into pigs listen watch the whitney rose i know what a big pig i am no no i was like not out yet no no it's not out yet by this time i don't think so it'll be out yet i think i don't know who knows it was so fun though i got to watch it and annie killed it you really did thank you your jokes were great um i one of my favorite ones on the panel i also liked bob the drag queen a lot oh bob drag queen yeah bob the drag queen crushed crushed but yeah you handled everything i think that would be so hard i never done any kind of roasting to like hear everyone just making fun of you and you just have to be like well the only ones that are annoying are when they're like lies yeah for me not for anyone else because it's not like a well-crafted joke

well it's also just like that's my my like one of my highest values is just honesty so like it pisses i always realize like whenever i'm like triggered it's because like i'm like oh because in my head the most important thing is being honest but these people don't give a shit they're just getting laughs they don't fucking care at all it is and they don't have to care i'm not right over them it's just like the thing i like so i'm getting all pissed but it would be like you know like she's never even seen her dad i'm like hey scott i talked to him five times already today yeah i'm on every episode i know i guess it hurt my feelings like guess you don't know well i think they didn't do their research that's what probably hurt your feelings

well cause the exciting thing about Rose is like really being seen even if it's a mean thing like call me fat it's like fucking I gained a lot of weight it's funny

but like there were funnier ones like I'm trying to think of like the best well my favorite joke about me even though it wasn't

very mean was like Bob the Drag Queen was like where do you get your tan do you just go to 7-eleven and stand in front of the hot dog machine yeah that's wait wasn't there a really good bobby kalilah joke there yes robin tran please post a picture of robin tran okay robin tran is what um is if bobby and kalilah kept the baby oh yeah it was really good it was really good but robin tran had really good jokes too but robin trans

were like very like you can tell she likes researched everyone she went in hard yeah it was really good but robin i had one about robin because robin um i, allegedly is the one that got the sky writing that said Joe Rogan is literally 5'3". Oh, really? It's rumored to have been her. And so I said, that's ironic because she literally transitioned into literally a 5... Or wait, literally. She transitioned literally from a 5 to a 3.

Yeah, I remember that joke. It was awesome. But yeah, we were very brutal to her. She got it. She was mean to me back but i think you can be more mean to the people who you know are gonna bring it right because she's such a good writer yeah yeah well i think like she and i really did and bob like i don't even know if bob spent a lot of time or not but i didn't know bob was i didn't even know about

bob bob is everything i was like Bob the drag queen is like. Yeah, but drag queen is like, that's their Olympic sport. But listen, she identifies she, he, whatever you want, Robin, I'll call you whatever you want. Or Bob, I mean, I'll call you whatever you want. Bob, you're everything. Except Robin, sorry. You do not identify as Robin. But Bob the drag queen was fucking unbelievable.

Crazy good. What do you guys um what do you guys want for christmas this year what are some big asks from both the universe and the people that you love i'd really like some new towels what kind what kind do you have are you kidding i'm like i know what we're doing in San Jose. Towel shopping. I was like, spoil my opening. It's happening this weekend, even though we didn't bank this. It's Christmas.

You guys don't steal hotel towels? No, but that would be great. I have a traumatizing memory of that. My dad and mom, their two biggest fights. I may have mentioned one of them on here already. The first fight, they're screaming. It sounds physical. We can hear just bum, bum, bum like you can tell they're wrapped in each other's arms and they're banging against walls and we're like what is happening are they about to fist fight and they burst through the kitchen door they come out we're like in the living room they bust through

the door and then out pops and rolls to my feet a thing of icing and they were fighting over this icing they just both wanted the icing so bad they're just like a tub of it yeah they're icing pigs they love my parents oh they're piggy icing people no you're like if you're at a wedding with my parents they will stab each other over the corner piece like they just love icing my dad will be known to bring his own icing to add on top on my dad's 80th birthday 50 people brought him icing like everyone knows my dad i've never heard of anything like people i love my parents i love pig people but okay so i'm not judging i just i know you're judging ice cream yeah it is disgusting it's disgusting and now they have a fat daughter um

no i just was like it's fine i'm fat but you're fat where does the towel come in with it okay so then that was the other one okay so then the other fight my mom's screaming at my dad scott what are you teaching the children what are you teaching them and we just go in and we'd been in like at disneyland or something and my dad just unfolds like four white ass towels and my mom's like they know you stole those and i was like we wouldn't have fucking noticed if you didn't scream it but that was a big fight so now i never she was your mom was mad that your dad had stolen and that we would then have the we would see that he stole oh i see out of like um you know be the example which is the opposite of todd's family who has trained him to be the best thief

of all well me too it's amazing i think asian people think theft is if you get away with it one of the most gratifying feelings. She let people steal all of her. You never press charges, right? No, I don't. Yeah? Yeah. People follow up on that.

If you can steal from me, it's fair game. If you can steal from me, it's yours. That's how I feel about cheating too. If you can cheat on me, and I don't find out. Did you cheat? I mean, sometimes it's like I would almost- Did you cheat? No, you didn't.

That does not count for todd todd will be dead on the ground i was gonna say for all my other boyfriends who did definitely wait so um i mean my i would steal you guys know this like i would go to outback steakhouse and steal all the utensils they are pretty good knives and we did it out back she took me to outback it was a special one of our first dates. Yeah. And I'm not going to lie. She did shit all over it. She was like, well, actually, Santino took me to like a real steakhouse.

Was it? I did not. Oh. Mastros. That's where you guys went. We went there. Yes. But then Santino took me on the road and took me to a different steak dinner.

Well, he is a ginger, so I will always be superior to him. You have to step up your steak game. Well, I also am a little bit. I still lean into the white trashness. You see the tan. It's fun to go to Outback. I think so, too. I love canned ravioli forever.

Oh, yeah. I used to eat that. Chef Boyardee. I will say, though, that waiter was the worst waiter I've ever had in my entire life yeah he was a problem he was a little pushy and we didn't order let's just say we didn't order we were just brought food that we didn't want oh it's like omakase he was yeah but it wasn't the good food i was like that i have a plan here wait juicy i want to know what else is on your list outside yeah what's on your list what was towels serious um well i've like those are the kind of things on my list just like i don't need but by the way towels are the hardest thing to

shop for right i think they're most of them are really not absorbent and when do you have time to go get some towels you know like that's not on my list but your coochie cutters are cutting i learned this from from like go-go dancers do you wear these leggings and you don't have cellulite does it work i have so much mine's just gonna pop out even more oh oh it's so having these nails with yeah how do you do anything everything's been hell it's been horrible it's been so we have towels for juicy i feel like everything is going so I'm so happy right now with all the things in my life. And then the next year things are like, they're going to, I told Annie, they're going to have

me headline San Jose Improv next year. When? Wednesday, January 18th. Wednesday, January 18th. You guys. Good tickets. Everybody go see Juicy. And you guys probably already saw her do like a little bit of time on my show in San Jose.

So go back and see her. It's perfect because we're there. We went there. We went there. We haven't been there yet. It's not that we're going tomorrow. We went months ago. We wouldn't bank that far ahead.

That's rude. That's the most rude. That's the most mean to do. Annie, do you ask for Christmas christmas presents at all or did you no i have there's not one thing i can think i want you guys don't say like exchange like hey this is what i want this year and like exchange lists with your family i'm so i listen i've never had christmas face presents getting presents is really stressful do you like receiving presents no i like giving presents but i'll take presents now it's i i love yeah it's i but it took me a

while because i used to just get so like i don't know i just like if i didn't like like it i would feel pressure to look like i liked it and i'm like not a good liar so then i just start crying and then it was like way worse than just not getting me a present right i like presents but i love giving yeah you do is my shit yeah we play this game daddy warbucks over here yeah i think i'm kind of a daddy warbucks yeah like what we do in my family is or bobby and i for the past couple years is we'll buy like five or maybe four big ticket items like a traeger grill and elisa traeger grill wow the traeger grill when she gr you it hurts i'll tell you that and then we'll we'll get a box fill it with rocks and wrap it up like a pretty christmas present and people

draw numbers and it's a hit or miss you either get the bag of rocks or you get a trigger grill and then people but if you get the trigger grill you can only get someone can challenge you for it once and once only so people you don't know yet violent aggressive angry and like leave crying and that's the kind of christmas that i desire i like that too no i like a little squid games not to be racist a little squid games of sorts one time my uncle gave my cousin a car key and she was like started crying and she went outside and she was looking for it and then we were all laughing because there was no coffee. She was like legit mad for a long time. That's so cruel.

Was she just looking around like bleep, bleep, bleep? Annie, how do you get your day started? I get my day started. I get up. All right. I give Randy a little tongue kiss. I put on his leash and then I go into the kitchen and I make some athletic greens. I shake them up. It's easy. I put a packet in or put in a scoop,

put in my water, shake it up, take my dog for a walk and chug my salad for the day, baby. I'm back home and I've already had all my salad for the entire day. With one delicious scoop of athletic greens, you're absorbing 75 high quality vitamins, minerals, whole food source, superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens to help you start your day right. This special blend of ingredients supports your gut health, your nervous system, your immune system, your energy, recovery, focus, and aging, all of the things. It tastes so good too. It tastes great. It's easy. You don't have to chew. Do you not want to chew? I wake up with a sore jaw sometimes. I don't have to chew and I've got all of my vitamins.

And it's lifestyle friendly whether you eat keto, paleo, vegan, dairy-free or gluten-free. It costs you less than three dollars a day. You're investing in your health and it's cheaper than your cold brew habit. And it just eliminates any kind of like guesswork about what I'm going to eat that day to meet my body's needs. I just have one scoop, cold water, my matcha stir, and then that's it. I don't have to worry about it for the rest of the day. It's delicious. And right now it's time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient daily nutrition, especially heading into the flu and cold season. It's just one scoop and a cup of water every day. That's it. No need for a million different pills

and supplements to look out for your health. To make it easy, Athletic Greens is going to give you a free one-year supply of immune-supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday. Again, All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday. Again, that's athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. You guys, it's not a secret. We all have a certain degree of mental illness between us and this group.

I'm doing good. I don't know what the heck you guys are talking about. And unfortunately, life doesn't come with a user manual. So when it's not working for you, it's normal to feel stuck. And for me personally, I have the tendency to get stuck on problem mode and not solutions mode. And this is where a therapist is really helpful in my life because they're able to sort of just give me exits, I guess. They're able to call me out and say, Kalilah, you're in this shame spiral or you're this. They're able to basically see things about me that I'm not, maybe I don't, I don't have the awareness for in that moment. Also, look, it's the holidays. You're either with your family

being dragged back to whatever role you were when you lived with them, or you're not with your family being dragged in whatever role you're in now. You're either sad or you're happy. But, you know, the holidays are a lot and it's a great time to get help. Yeah. And it's like even if you have the most perfect family, like it's normal great time to get help. Yeah. And it's like, even if you have the most perfect family, like, like it's, it's normal to have really challenging emotions around the holidays. And this is where therapists who are trained can help you figure out the cause of these challenging emotions and learn productive coping skill. As the world's largest therapy service, BetterHelp has matched 3 million people with professionally licensed and vetted therapists available 100 online plus it's affordable just fill out a brief questionnaire to match with a therapist and if things aren't clicking you can easily switch to a new therapist

anytime it couldn't be simpler no waiting rooms no traffic no endless searching for the right therapist learn more and save 10 off your first month at betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday. That's betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday. After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time, all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one.

Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel. George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls and the fact that not a single call is ever dropped.

And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at 15 bucks a month. And all plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text

delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. That such a steal to get this new customer offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month go to mintmobile.com slash tuesday that's mintmobile.com slash tuesday cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com slash tuesday 45 up front payment required equivalent to 15 a month new customers on first three month plan only speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan additional taxes fees and restrictions apply statement mobile for details we had a company little shop uh shop of ours no gift exchange yes and i was a production wake up santa you've been drinking too much nog it's a lot of milk that's why it's not because of the alcohol no i'm just really

bloated oh god but i was an office pa so i'm literally at the bottom of the the feed chain there and i and i but i got a 25 limit i got like a candle and some fairy lights from target and wrapped them up and we're exchanging them and i think you'd picked a number or something and the person who got mine was the ceo so like making more money than everybody and she looked so disappointed and it was anonymous so she was just like oh cool and then i was just like wow what did you get like an iphone i got a juicer but not like a like a like a citrus juicer thing they were all like that's not that much better than a scented candle i have a big scented candle same i was like i'd be so happy and fairy lights yeah wait i have a candle place in malva that i go what do you mean listen i like to drop when i started making money the teak no no no i go to marshall's girl we need to up your i like melon gets yeah wait

that's how you say i think so but candles can be expensive too no it's like malibu something they have a good rum one that's great yeah but these Yeah, rum is great. Malibu something. It's past the market. It's like this beautiful furniture place, and they have the best imported candles, and they're so expensive, and they're so good. I don't like spending too much on candles because you're just burning it away. I don't spend like $10 or less on a candle.

That's like the best part of spending money is just like burning it. It's gone, baby. I think it's bullshit when you smell it, and it's a really strong scented candle but when you burn it no smell no scents come out yeah that's a ten dollar marshall bullshit the ones i got one at marshall's called donut shop it smells so good donut shop yeah i'll get you by the way this did trigger me having to i don't really think you're fat i was teasing you oh thank god but don't really think you're fat. I was teasing you. Oh, thank God. But Donut Shop did remind me to tell you that. You do with that what you want.

I hike a lot. Listen, I hike a lot. I hike a lot. I have to for how much I eat. And I eat late too. Yeah, you just have to counter it. That's all. I've been not eating late and it's good for my GERD.

I don't think it's done anything for my weight. It's good for my GERD. My rule is like three hours before I sleep is the last. never know when i'm going to sleep though guys i'm a pass out girl i'm waking up on stairs i have like a very nice bed and i am very often a nighttime routine i wash my face let's just say when i wake up in my wake that's my song that's all you know who plays that song paulie shore and the crusties paulie shore plays that and the crusties has been they cover that song would you ever be a crusty have you been oh it's a crusty i don't think i'm a crusty yet maybe when i'm older oh they have to

be old yeah he wants to be the best looking guy in the band so what is a crusty just a backup can you look at paulie shore and the crusties? They're like, you know, you'll see. They're older dudes. They're crusty. That's so funny. See? He wants to be the youngest, most attractive guy in the band, he says. Oh, my God.

They're just going to keep dropping down. They can play. Because they've been around. They've been playing for 70 years. He met the guitar player, Bill, in a Starbucks. Wait, I met Bill. Is Bill the one that looks like Larryry david yes you met him he's awesome i did the show with him it's so funny yeah he's great oh wow he does look like larry david and he rips he can play like guitar solos and starbucks is it like the ding dong show or like no it's legit good yeah actually okay okay

wait i want to tell you guys the other things that I would get you. Okay, here are some other gifts that are life ruining. Okay. A fish. Oh, yeah. That would be. What a fucking bummer. The responsibility.

And a better one that's even worse. The fish you bring out and the person's pissed. And then the person next to them is laughing that they didn't get the fish. And then you hand them a turtle. whole turtle a fucking turtle enjoy this for 80 years bitch i got you it's gonna outlive you and then you're like it's a gift it's not mine no touchies no give backsies i had a turtle named otis and i would drop fish and like little guppies in there for him to eat. And one of the times I dropped in a fish and Otis just refused to eat this fish. Like him and his fish like built a rapport and we named him Milford. And I was dating this guy.

He was. And then Milford, this is how Milford perished. I had, I was getting back together with a boyfriend, but he was a very volatile guy. And I remember him stealing my neighbor's groceries just for fun. But one of the things that he did when we got into a fight that night was he took a cup and he scooped Milford out. And Milford had been cohabitating with Otis at this point for like five months. And we had gotten attached to Milford.

And he was like, you see this? And he just swallows Milford.ford anyways that was my turtle story that's really sad i know but it's also the tiniest bit awesome of the bad things you can do to someone what if it was a cat well then i would be worried about his safety yeah that is true if you can swallow a cat, go for it. If you can steal from me, steal from me. If you can swallow a cat, you got a thing. When someone steals from you, do you immediately start accusing in your mind? I have a list.

I'm doing a whole, I'm on Dateline. I've got the interview set up in my head. I'm like going, but okay. So I went to the desert two months ago. And I was like partying with a bunch of friends. We go out to the desert once a year. It's like a bunch of Doug Stanhope's friends, Andy Andrus and a bunch of people. And, you know, we do like mushrooms and stuff.

We hang out by like a campfire and the people that work at the place that we stay, there's always like a new weirdo that's like decided to go to the middle of the desert for some weird reason and live and work. I love desert rats. Yeah. Yeah. But they always end up being a little strange.

Yeah. So this one girl, she had her phone. No humidity. It dries out their brain. Yeah. It's like, it's more or less than the drying out but that is a good point i do imagine that's where i'm from wait where are you from the desert what part arizona and phoenix it does get dry there but you're in society this is like there's

no like yeah but i've had a lot i've gone to a lot of desert parties i know exactly what you're talking about yeah so this year there was this girl who was i don't know what else to call her other than a fucking liar we go on a walk usually we're all fucked up and we go is it time for the walk we have all these like like glowing orbs and stuff and we walk down the highway and then we lay in the road and we look at the stars like we do this every year she comes with us she's fucking just lying there's just weird things it was colder this time we went out so she goes she goes there's gonna be a part of the night where you give me your jacket and i went i'm never giving you my jacket was she flirting i don't know what i think the bitch was cold honestly and thought that i was going to somehow mother her so we get there and she goes

this is the time and i go this is the time where you learn to get your own fucking jacket bitch okay the wrong annie wrong year maybe two years ago I would have done this for you you're done but she just kept like lying about her age she just kept lying that's what she said she was 21 I'm like bitch you are 40 like stop like she was just so weird and so creepy right and she was the only one that wasn't in our group so later we go back we go on that walk we come back we're sitting around the campfire this girl goes to go to bed she can't find her phone her phone was attached to the speaker the speaker's gone the phone's gone check all the rooms and i'm just like the only bitch we don't know is the liar bitch so i'm in my head even though i think she was with us the whole time and maybe possibly it could have been

her in my head she did it for attention yeah or like for there to be like a thing that she caused she was like that type of weirdo yeah i know people like that like they like not even like she wants a phone or anything but she wants people to be like running around and know that she did it i mean yeah i don't like i don't know why people do stuff like that it makes me really uncomfortable and now like i like how you say annie two years ago would have fallen for that like i i would have placated to that but now that i've seen that type of person many times if i even get like a hint of it i'm like i do a 180 but you're stuck in the desert but it was fine i was able to like i was able to not like i wasn't rude or anything but i was able to kind of like put a boundary yeah in my family there's a lot of blatant theft going around.

I had an aunt who would like, let's say, for instance, we all go to the beach together. And let's say I'm going in the water. Like, hey, can you hold my stuff? And she's wearing my sunglasses, my Ray-Bans that I just bought. And 10 minutes later, you're like, where are my sunglasses? She's like, your sunglasses? No. And then you don't. But in my family, you cannot confront cannot confront like that's a weird thing but like two

weeks later you see it on instagram she's posting with your sunglasses but you cannot say anything no one is saying anything so we just take it we're just like that's just who she is my family don't do that to this behavior i almost sneezed i would be fucking my family all we do is confront confront confront confront nobody could ever steal from anyone because it's like but you actually you know the theft the theory in my family my twin brother would just steal my older brother's clothes and then put them back like he hadn't taken them but he's like a slob so my brother would get like new we all worked at gap so we'd all get like new gap clothes all the time oh that's so cute all of you worked at gap well

timmy didn't but max and i worked at my twin brother and i worked at different gaps over christmas so max would work at uh regular gap and i'd work at kids gap and then we'd go we were seasonal workers and they were across the hall you wore that same outfit i wore the same outfit i was 14 uh and but we had like the little walkie talkies and the little headsets and we would go to like channel 13 and we'd like talk shit walkie talkies and the little headsets and we would go to like channel 13 and we'd like talk shit together it was so cute our little breaks together but um anyway so timmy would get like his like gap thing he'd use like our discount or whatever and max would take his gap stuff out of like the plastic wear it get a stain on it fold it put it

back in it was like gangster it was so funny to me like max and we'd all just be like crying laughing because it's like it's funnier than it is a problem i feel like my family has such different styles they would never steal like we'd never want each other's stuff yeah i don't think for us it's more uh just a sport at this point oh my god i remember my uncle freddie oh never trust an uncle freddie no but he was the victim here freddie got fingered he really did he actually i figured um so my uncle freddie his son is like a known like the number one like thief in my family right so he was like you know what i'm gonna sleep with my wallet on me and all of like my prized possessions on me my watch everything and it's like the theft is so blatant in my family like he woke up with nothing not even his belt whoa his son was just

again with his little ginger fingers how you say it ginger no with his little like gingerly with his gingerly with his finger is he a gingerbread man are we talking about santino i was texting i got confused i didn't know your brother was ginger but he was he expertly just took everything while my uncle was asleep like like this holding his things huh like the grinch yes that's so crazy god that's kind of impressive though naughty list yeah naughty getting cool you're getting that and then they're the ones that don't get the box of rocks they get the fucking they get the girl yeah do you think lisa trager's family is the trager girls i hope so different

spelling yeah i guess her family came over from she's so funny she is hilarious she must be working because i haven't seen her at the store in a bit But yeah, every time I see her she cracks me up. I had a traditional Christmas like My mom always goes all out and my dad does too But we would always do yule time with my dad because I grew up half Wiccan So we go to like we go out to the day the desert. Why didn't I think you'd like the Wiccan? So fun. We go to the the desert why didn't i think you'd like the wiccan this is so fun we go to the desert celebrate the wiccan christmas like tell me everything it's well it's like a you still do

like the same kind of ceremony like circle but it's called yule time and there's a big cake and it's a yule log i love a yule log do they taste so delicious yeah so fucking good and then i remember look up yule logs they're cute too yeah they're cute and yeah it's like a it's like that part's all the same but um but then we would have regular christmas too at the house with the christmas tree and presents and a lot of with my parents being divorced if they didn't communicate that year i'd get a lot of the same stuff oh my god but that was damn yeah. They're so good. They're so cute.

And you can put little elves on them. Sometimes they put little elves. Yeah. And we, we'll like drink a lot. But it's a good time. But your, was your mom like jealous?

Was she like, it was, it's always, it's always like, I have a joke where I'm like, now that I'm older, cause my parents are split. They tell me I can choose which house

to go i want to go to for the holidays i'm like i liked it so much better when the courts just wait is it was it not like an amicable when you choose do you put one of those things on your head what do you mean oh the judge thing i'm like order order yeah i it was it was amicable but you know they're still divorced so they're not like yeah talking on the phone every day so especially as i'd be surprised well they weren't on a hip podcast together that would have been different but i i don't know they now that it's like i'm out of school and stuff they really don't have much reason to talk to each other.

So it's just a lot of planning. And, you know, it just gets harder to see everybody as people get older and move on. I like how you're- Your dad was an active Wiccan? Yeah. But was he like an active Wiccan? Like he taught you things about like-

Yes, yes, yes. He's very spiritual. Like him and my stepmom. My mom is too, too but she just doesn't she's more agnostic but i was just gonna say you're like trans age just like like esther like you both are like what age could you be you're like now that i'm out of school it's like she looks like she just graduated from high school like now that i'm finally out i can't wait to start college you and fucking asked her the exact same i know working at the

comedy store feels like going back to school though as like a door guy it's like a program you're good though you really don't get into the drama it's great no i tried to dodge it like people will like call me in the big did you hear about so and so i'm like what and then you're like friends with the person they're talking shit on i try to just yeah i try to be accepting as every with everybody because uh i just don't want to get involved but do you guys feel like as you got more uh well known um sometimes i kind of feel like that i'm becoming a little bit of a target uh in the sense of like if i mess up i think people would be happy to see me fall yeah a little bit not everybody good but there's a few people when you're getting to the new level of a video game you encounter more yeah

yes yeah so starting to feel that a little bit you just have to not take it personally because it's nothing to do with you yeah yeah i'm trying to like and then then when i feel like focus and i'm like okay i should just be working on my set like i always been doing and just focus on that the hurts full part is if these are people who you considered your peers and friends at some point that that's where it's like oh fuck the bitches that talk shit to me that spread all the rumors all the stuff there was this guy when i was in fuck what club was it um i was in salt lake city at wise guys and this guy that works there he like does cameras or something and he's also an open micer he comes around with a with a notebook and he says what advice would you give yourself when you were an open mic or like write it i think i know who you're talking about. Yeah. And so in the book I wrote,

everyone that's spreading rumors about you and talking shit on you, um, has cankles and quit to have kids. I think we should, you know what? I've been a hater. But cankles are okay. Yeah.

Cankles are good. They're very sturdy. I would say I like cankles better than skinny. Well, ankles. Cause for the safety of the person, I have this weird thing and I've talked about it on here, but I'm really trying to let go of my fixation with men with girl hips.

I've enjoyed a man with girl hips before. I was with the guy with girl hips for five years. So now I'm just like so like focused on looking for that in a man. And if I see it, I'm like, no, thanks. But I'm like, why am I this shallow? Because it's not, it's because you don't like him. You're thinking about him. He was so kind and sweet.

Oh, and he had hips? Yeah. I wonder what it was. I don't know. No, you don't. You have the opposite. Thank you. I don't know what that looks like.

I want guy hips. No, you have girl hips. It's more just like a, it's not even like a big, like a very hippie look. It's just more, it doesn't go in like this. I see. So it kind of like bubbles out ever so slightly and they kind of like have like, yeah, I don't know. It's a look I can't really explain. Yeah.

Let's just say the bottom heavy boys have found their way to Annie Letterman before. Let's just say I've tasted the rainbow of sizes and shapes. Those apple bottom boys. Those apple bottom boys have found their pie crust in me. But I like chubbos. I just don't like hips. I, yeah. I don't know.

You can have the biggest biggest belly just like it cannot like move down to your it's just so funny i was looking at todd when we were in the desert and i always am like todd's always his hottest in the desert for some reason i don't know why he's he's just such a man he's helping around camp and he's just you know not that he's not always doing everything but i was like it's so funny i never like such a hot tall handsome guy like how did it happen i never thought i would i always thought i'd end up with a real i'll go well way past popped you know way past popped i way past popped you're right sometimes i'm like do i deserve this cute boy i like this boy's so cute

such a hottie what is going on with the new squeaky boots is there something happening with the squeaky boots oh yeah here we go you're very fall colored for uh christmas why are you acting like it's november inspired me to go get new boots at All Saints. They're so squeaky. I know they're a little squeaky right now. They're honestly the most squeaky thing I've ever heard in my life. They're not the most.

They're so squeaky. Carlos, they're pretty loud. How do I unsqueak them? And they shift around. Maybe loosen them a little. Jesus, they're tightly. You got to do some steps in them. Well, I went to military school, so I'm like tightening.

Not for long enough. Right. I didn't go for long enough and it didn't stick wait how long were you in military school for just two weeks oh my god he's a rich kid he got his ass out he goes dad no yeah basically daddy no i went to mcdonald's right after that's bad i need i was doing mcdonald's oh i love mcdonald's don't act like you're the one without the eating disorder i'm teasing you because you're manorexic manorexic he's manorexic i never heard that before really look it up you're like really i hear it every day people come with that constantly he's like really it's a very real disorder he's proud of it i think i am you are manorexic a man who thinks it's a that's urban dictionary a man who thinks it's attractive to

be skinny and lacking in muscle mass or any outward fiscal appearance of masculinity oh the most amusing example oh but do you kind of relate to it no because i do lift weights at the gym in my building. You're super toned. Thank you, Chloe. You are. Thank you. Mm-hmm. What, like girl-toned? No, I'm not girl-toned. I would say model-toned.

Thank you. Girl model-toned. You are, everyone's in a good mood today. Everyone's just a good amount of high. Okay, so I went on a fun weekend with a couple of my friends and i found out that my friend does not watch our podcast because he told me that he cancels his credit card every two months because he doesn't know what subscription what subscriptions he has well i don't blame him like a lot of these companies make it really difficult to cancel these subscriptions and

sometimes i don't know what i'm signing up for because it's like oh i want this app in this moment and i completely forget like two years after i'm like why do i have an insect finder oh yeah i'll cancel this and this before the seven day trial it'll be it's five years later i'm like oh my god i gave them fifteen thousand dollars are you guys wasting money on subscriptions? 80% of people have subscriptions they forgot about. Definitely Annie and I. Yes. But maybe for you, it's an unused Amazon Prime account or a Hulu account that never gets streamed. Rocket Money is a great app that we use to help us track all of our expenses. And because of it, we no longer waste money on subscriptions we don't even use. Look, I found out that I have two Apple IDs and I double. I mean, it's crazy, you guys. It's helped me. It saves so much money.

That's why I love using Rocket Money, formerly known as Truebo. And Rocket Money can even find subscriptions you didn't know you were paying for. You may even find out that you've been double charged for a subscription. And to cancel a subscription, all you have to do is press cancel and Rocket Money takes care of the rest. Do you want to know a subscription that I'm having so much trouble and I have to use my Rocket Money for? I have to use my Rocket Money to get rid of... I am paying for four tans a month four spray tans a month like that if you've ever gotten a spray tan it takes like two weeks

for it to come off your body to get another one but is it just an auto refill? they come no they come spray me but you get like you pay for the month and then you pay for them to come to your

but it's like I'm not getting all the spray tans I would look crazy I would be cancelled out of this out of this business so fast if I got that many spray tans. Get rid of useless subscriptions with Rocket Money now. Go to rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday. Seriously, it could save you hundreds per year. That's rocketmoney.com

slash trash Tuesday. After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time, all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one.

Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learn about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel. George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls and the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you

with plans starting at 15 bucks a month. And all plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. That is such a steal. To get this new customer offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month,

go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. That's mintmobile.com slash tuesday cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com slash tuesday 45 up front payment required equivalent to 15 a month new customers on first three month plan only speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan additional taxes fees and restrictions apply same mint mobile for details i don't like it no more because i quit and i piece of trash details i don't like it no more because i quit and i i'm a piece of trash what i don't like it no more i don't like it no more whenever i see it on my list santa's getting riled up naughty we're on the bad list how long

did you smoke and why'd you quit i smoked for over a decade and I quit in April. So, and I've quit before that too. And, but I, for like over a year and then I started during the pandemic and then I quit again in April. And how do you feel? Do you, are you getting the, the purging kind of cough? I'm well over that. Uh, but I did. And I feel like, so like all this momentum in my career, that's been happening. It happened like right around when i quit smoking as well and i think i don't know if it's specifically because of that or if just like maybe when you actively make positive changes in your life sometimes things tend to follow and i and i really think that because polly was like wanting to take me on the road but um he noticed how much i chain smoked at work and i think he would have taken me anyway but he noticed how much I chain smoked at work. And I think he would have taken me anyway,

but he was really happy to hear that I wasn't smoking that much because he likes to work with people that take care of their health. And I think, I don't know, just a lot of things happen. I've been hiking more because I can now. I like inspirational Santa.

Yeah. I think you're right because I think like, you know, behind the scenes or even if you're not conscious about it you're doing something really nice for yourself yeah and then you're allowing yourself to be nice to yourself i think and then you start allowing nice things to happen for you after you got to put yourself on the nice list yeah no one's putting you on there by listen santa guys i'm so sorry it's not real you're santa you got to take care of yourself you got to put yourself on the good list can you make me a fade away from the chair guys let's know is above and beyond how are you guys able to do

how are you halloween decoration annie that was five dollars from target on sunset five dollars that's the splurge i like how you laid it up i feel like pete really did like judge it i feel like pete was like am i right pete he's just making sure the snow is visible on the wide he's like we're gonna need a little more we gotta even it out here sorry i'll put it back up no actually it looks good how are you gonna find such i don't know how are you gonna find such thin that's also from target non-striking uh tinsel tinsel yeah that's tinsel i i think it's tinsel now when you went in did you throw it in the thing were you pissed were you drinking i wasn't a were you drinking target i can tell you where i literally can tell

you are by what you bought i can tell exactly how you bought you threw it in that you were like oh and you probably did have the medulla in the car right you were pissed you put it down i don't think you brought it in no i didn't i know i only drink and drive i don't you definitely drink and drive yeah there's no way he doesn't drink and drive of course i do guys what are we talking about yeah don't go around beverly boulevard and fairfax and the mugs too i got those for y'all they're cute i do like the mugs a lot cool um and then did you consider and you considered which one on which i didn't do that but it kind of worked out because you're like the strength of

the podcast you're like the tree of the podcast oh i like that strong like tree you're the strength i'm the fucking dough boy and you're santa and but esther is not santa no esther is and she's not i don't know what esther is she's that the candle she's the menorah yeah yeah it's just r.i.p esther what's that wait what's the best present you guys have ever gotten and what's the worst present you ever got ps5 last year oh you got it from who my mom this is crazy yeah you're a grown man i didn't ask for it it just got it just showed up really yeah i didn't say mom i want a playstation 5 i went home to texas and the playstation 5 was there and she like asked around what do people want what do what do guys she does ask me what i want sometimes

and this year i was like oh well i could use a new ipad well that was extra special the ps5 because that was very hard to come by last year i know know for Bobby's 50th, I paid like double the price. Yeah, she got it on Starbucks. That hurt for you too, didn't it? It sure did. I love it. I like paying double. Is that what you're saying?

You prefer it? No, I'm saying I love the PlayStation. No, I like getting a thing when I want it. I like being like, ooh. Tim Dillon, I told you, Tim Dillon called me once. He goes, goes any money fixes everything and ever since he said that to me i was like yeah it does but i was like i was gonna get the um uggs that esther has the like the platform ones but they're sold out everywhere and then i

was like it's too many people have them if they're that sold out that i don't want them anymore and the uggs the short ones yeah the short ones even though they're so cute out that I don't want them anymore. The short ones. Yeah, the short ones. Even though they're so cute. I just went, you know what? If they're sold out everywhere they're too. I want to come up with a new one. Yeah. A different one but I was like, should I spend? I think they were like for $350 you could get them. Tim Dillon is right. Money can

absolutely buy happiness. It just cannot prevent sadness. He didn't say that. He said money can fix everything. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Except no, it cannot. Because it cannot just cannot prevent sadness he didn't say that he said money can fix everything oh yeah yeah except no it cannot because it cannot fix sadness what i'm saying like it can drastically improve your life but it's not going to prevent you from yeah your dips but it was interesting to learn like that you can kind of just pay to have your credit fixed yeah stuff like that like things that when i was broke like did you do that yeah that's awesome wait annie you don't have a criminal record you don't how you know i ask

myself the same thing all the time i'm like how did i i bust in loud i'm loud people are like there's no way she's doing what we think she's doing that is true that's like a do you do you not have a criminal record juicy she thought though i like that you had to think about it yeah i'm i'm pretty good you have you ever been detained in your life no um i get stopped all the time by coughs and i think i think part of it is the glasses like maybe i don't know if i'm like a stoner they think i'm a stoner and they like search my car and they don't find anything. You're getting a car searched a lot?

You allow them to? Well, so the last time it happened, I said no because people were like, you can tell them no. And then they brought out the dog and then they're like, well, if my dog barks, then we're going to search it. And I was like, all right. And sure enough, he like pulls on the dog's chain

and he barks. I swear to God, it was all set up and sure enough he like pulls on the dog's chain and he barks i swear to god it was all set up and they don't find nothing and yeah the worst time but it actually ended up being funny was i was doing a going from san diego to phoenix so we're close to the border and they stopped us at the border me and my friend and they were searching my car forever but i was doing a sketch comedy show so there are all these props in the truck oh funny they're like pulling out like a rubber saw and bending it like all these scarves and it's really he's all laughing at this point i'm like glad you're having fun i yeah i've never had my car searched never i've never been in a drunk tank either

no i told you when I got pulled over drunk. But I was friends with all the cops. When I was an alcoholic in San Fe, I just became friends with all the cops. I was like premeditated. Like I knew what was going to happen. Do you think that was pretty privileged? Like do you think if you were. Yeah.

Yeah. But I also worked these motherfuckers. I was friends with them. I sometimes get DMs from people like, it's Fred. I'm like, what's up, Fred? Fred! He's like, how you doing?'re still drinking at brunch no baby it's better to just be nice and make friends with people than be confrontational from the start yeah but i used to think it was funny when i was drunk to take pictures with cops so i would always like when i was wasted i would like you know because the cops and drunk people always eat at the same places because they're open late yeah in a small town true so we were always

together it's like what am i gonna like act weird around them and i wasn't into like coke or anything so i wasn't doing anything like illegal until i got into the car yeah so i was just like you know i would just go over and be like can we take a pit i just thought it was so funny because i would be like eyelash my cheek wasted like so i had all these pictures with them and then we just became friends i also was friends with the um the guy the parking guy the parking ticket guy and uh the meter maid and um so whenever i would park my scooter in like crazy places did you ever have a scooter yeah like a razor yeah oh okay because you have scooter energy like I do, I think. No, like a Vespa scooter?

Yeah, you have Vespa energy. I've always wanted one of those, but I never had one. Yeah, you would fucking rock it. But I think you've passed that place in your time in your life. Yeah. Because we're too, like, grown up to get on a fucking... On a Vespa. We got places to go.

We got good lives. Yeah. That's what, like, Todd... I've gotten in fights with todd because the only thing that annoys me about todd ever is sometimes when he's wasted he's like too drunk to realize he's drunk and wants to drive and i'm like i have to be like i have a beautiful life i have worked so hard to have i am so happy you are not taking me out annie you can't you drink and drive in the Tesla though I don't know where the Z is in Tesla but no I put on auto drive or whatever no you stop to be

present in doing you have to put it on drunk driver I feel like the Tesla was designed I feel like the Tesla was designed so you can text and drive oh it's easy to text. Wait, don't they have those cars? Or did I imagine seeing this where you have to blow into this thing and it's like a breathalyzer? That's if you're a DUI. Before the car starts? Yeah, that's court mandated.

Oh, so it is a thing. That is a thing from the court. So fucking. Yeah, there's this girl, Gabby Lambie. Do you know who she is? Yeah. Yeah, she had a DUI back in the day. court so fucking yeah yeah there's this girl gabby lambie do you know who she is yeah yeah she is she she had a dui back in the day and i remember she'd post on instagram like sexy like blowing her thing pictures it was so fucking yeah her videos were awesome yeah it was so funny i remember halloween

when that was happening and she was dressed like a clown She was just like blowing the thing in this clown outfit. It's really funny. It's so good. But yeah, so I was friends with the cops. So they like would pull me over. And I remember being like, all right, I have to call my parents. Because I can never find my like, I couldn't find my, any of the papers I needed. I was like, I don't know where the registration is. So I went to call my mom.

And they were like, your parents are asleep. They're in Philadelphia. They're like, do not call your parents. And I was like, okay. They're like, we'll just follow you home. Just go home. And then I went to high five them and they weren't there anymore. I want to ask you guys something. On Tiger Belly, I briefly mentioned this, but I was talking, I had a long heart to heart with Sosie Bacon. And she was like, Klyla, like just be free. Like, and she was talking about sex in general. Cause I have this like fixation about like hygiene. And I think you do too.

Like we're always like, we have to be like super washed and clean for sex. I want to know if you think, or for me, I feel like I've missed out on really fun sex, sex, spontaneous sex opportunities because I've always wanted to be super squeaky clean before sex. And I feel like I'm ready to enter my filthy girl era.

Yeah, you got to have stinky sex. Well, you didn't have them in your long-term relationships? Never. Because Todd's always like, I like your stink. I like everything about you. I like when you smell. I like everything. But do you let him then? Yeah, I do. But I'm not going to have him eat me out when I smell bad about you. I like when you smell. I like everything. But do you just like, do you let him then?

Yeah, I do. But I'm not going to like have him like eat me out when I smell bad. But that's what I'm saying. I want that. I want to be able to be brave enough to be like, here. No, because then they kiss you. I've done it. And then it's on me.

Then they kiss. I'm like, oh, that's what I smelled like. I'm like, no. Then I know. And then it's like, oh, it's like more about me. It's like, oh, it's going to get back to me. Todd yesterday was like, because like boys, like how often do your balls itch? They just itch all the time.

Not all the time. He may have something. He doesn't have them all the time. But I'm saying I always see guys with their hands. Yeah, like, you know, a couple times a day. I'll scratch. Yeah. My pussy itches like frequently.

I am like, my hand is, I'm outbundying most of the time. There's a place, there's like a spot where I kind of just rest my finger. That's kind of a tuck up area. It's above the clit. It's not touching vaginal area, but it's like, you know, it's like, there's a little pocket of like fupa. Yeah. And it's gotta be this finger motion right here.

It's a hook. Yeah. Yeah. But I kind of just chill there sometimes. Not with the nails. It's a hook. Yeah. Yeah, but I kind of just chill there sometimes. Not with the nails. It's been a while. But, so it's not like

my hands are always smiling. Do you ever like go to hot yoga and you're like this and then you're like, oh, like I didn't wash my hands. Like I,

yeah. I'm like a pretty masturbating girl. Like I'm one of those kids. Masturbating. Masturbating. I'm not a masturbating, touching myself person. But I noticed my boyfriends have always been that way too or whatever.

I had a boyfriend who like one of his tics was like, he didn't even know. One of his dicks? One of his tics. Several dicks. There is a guy with two dicks, right? What? Yeah. In my life?

No. Oh, I thought you were like that. I told you about i was like i know but go ahead but he would like like without noticing he'd just kind of like tap like he's got his pants on but he would just tap the area where his penis is and then i'm like but it's like you can't take him around what are you looking at take him anywhere nice man with two dicks let's see it put it up on the screen see whoa wow somewhere right on top and somewhere side by side this is crazy do you think it's better juicy the side by side

or up and down this is crazy i would think up and down because it's like dp like one for the ass yeah why do they only circumcise one though but maybe side by side because then you don't have to use them both if you don't want to i would just put both in one both wow yeah that's fill my hole up completely this is crazy yeah and why aren't they small dicks it's like they're they're like you guys are blessed they do have one that's like better for the ass too look at that one it's like a little skinnier i love that you have the option like if you're not feeling extra you can choose the smaller one on some day The bigger one if you're feeling a little bit more, you know Look, oh my god. You're just naturally ambidextrous cuz you got to be able to jerk with both hands To feel like the stranger

Wow I would never go like this to feel like the stranger. All right, all right, we got this. Wow, that's crazy. Juicy, here's why I say the side by side is better than top bottom. Is because for masturbation purposes, it's harder to jerk off like this versus like this. It's funnier though. You're right though. I would be so annoyed. When when people are like how big is your

dick and he's like which one yeah he'd be all proud of it like do they like when they first meet a girl do they have to tuck one of the dicks because they're too nervous i don't want her to know yet wait can we look at those again i want to see what the ball situation was with them. Do they have four balls? No balls. No balls. Two dicks. No balls. One ball. Oh, no balls. Are there really no balls?

I don't see them. Balls are there in that one. Thanks for zooming in. This is crazy. Wait, I feel like some of these are not real. I feel like that one might be. He has a vagina too. And two dicks.

Die phallic. Incredible. Oh, he has a vagina too and diphalic incredible oh he has an instagram diphalic dude wait what is it what how long is it how many inches was that it looks like it's uh six or eight oh my god two eight inches that's 16 inches baby yeah eight jesus this is crazy it's like liquid at the top of one of them yeah sometimes liquid comes out yeah this is this is carlos trying to pretend he doesn't know what dicks do this is a great christmas episode merry christmas guys i mean this is quite a present to unwrap wow no there's diphthalic. I want you guys to, I want this to happen to a gay man too because I feel like men's sexuality,

like their horniness is like what those double dicks deserve. Yeah. Not like a frigid bitch that eventually is going to be like, oh, you make the one come, you're like another. Who's going to make dinner?

Wait, I have a question. Do you think both come at the same time? I was just going to ask, do they have multiple orgasms? This is crazy. Can we find a double dick person to call into the live show? Can we hit up Dyphallic Dude? Yes. Oh, my God.

Maybe he can video chat us. I just don't want to see his eyes. I want to see. What if he has everything's weird and only has one eye? Like everything's off. Everything that's two is one. Limb that's too is one how many ass he has no arms no arms but do you need arms when you have two dicks oh my god his penis can like he has to eat his food with his penis i knew there there was this woman that had um her arms were like underdeveloped that used to come into my restaurant and she would

have this like thing that would velcro around and then that's where she would put her fork and she would eat like that it's cool so maybe you could do that with the penis yeah maybe gotta be good at yoga what was that it's his it's the diphalic dude's twitter how many followers? It's only... Are you serious? Why is it all twos? Yeah. Because he's too dead. Also, I feel like you can make $8. And he's playing two trumpets. Whoa, he does two of everything.

I'm in a committed polyamorous relationship, but sometimes things get complicated. Hashtag smell yo dick. Wait, why was it 2014? This is a dead person. Is he dead? If Diaphallic Dude is dead, I'm quitting the show. Oh my God, I think he might be dead. He's definitely dead.

Where's he been? I mean, probably dealing with double dick stuff. Maybe I'll- Do you think the rigor mortis they sat in and he had boners? I would offer my body to science if i were him right to like be like as like mounted somewhere it looks like it's more common than we think though with all those pictures there's so many of them we've got to find a double dick dot got a different double

but aren't there ladies with two vaginas yes look up double vagina girl wait well here it says it only affects about one out of every five to six million that's a lot all right let me see about vaginas this is gonna be perfect this is gonna be crazy this is gonna be crazy um it's a condition that only happens in about one in every 3 000 women that's that's a comment that's a lot right yeah born with two vaginas not so rare abc news look up pictures we don't want to hear news you know it's funny i didn't even think of the pictures of the vaginas yeah what's going on carlos just say it just be yourself save it for the live i feel like they're better about because the vagina the guys are like taking so many pictures of their day but the women are not taking

pictures of the women are like i don't want anyone to see this i'm ashamed oh my god it looked like the vaginas are within the vagina though it didn't look like they were stacked i want them like side by side vaginal inception yeah i think they are this is from the atlantic this is what it's like a bat it's a the fuck is that girl did a diagram of it. Show us your pussy, bitch. She's hot, too. Let me see your vag. Yeah.

There's an OnlyFans creator with it. Hold on. Oh, my God. Oh, no, we can't. All right. There it is. I get it now. That's, yeah, I understand less. I feel like there's two entries, but one cervix.

Why does she have two eyes above the mouth? Oh, yeah, I understand less. I feel like there's two entries, but one cervix. Why does she have two eyes above the mouth? Oh, okay, okay. Yeah, it looks like Oscar the Grouch. It does. Oh, I guess it's just there's like two, oh, the whole, I wanted the whole thing. The fallopian tubes look like those in comic books where it's like pow. Yeah. Bam.

I wonder if a double dick guy and a double vagina girl have ever fallen in love. I hope so. And they didn't know it. They didn't know. Yeah. It was just they were naturally into each other. And then they found out they were siblings. And then Kalilah was like.

Straight to only hams. Only hams. Oh. Dreams. A girl can dream. Oh, dreams. A girl can dream. Oh, wait. So Todd, the other day, he tried to touch me with his, like, ball hand. I saw him take his hand out of his, like, ball area.

And I go, no, no, no, no. You're not touching me with ball hand. He started laughing, right? And then, like, five minutes passed and we kind of, like, forgot about ball hand. And he reached over as a bit and went like this. And it was ball hand. And I went, as he was touching my eyelids, I went, forgot about ball hand and he reached over as a bit and went like this and it was ball hand and i went as he was touching my eyelids i went it's ball hand and he he laughed so fucking hard i had a i i had a friend who was just the nastiest motherfucker but like girls would be like i have a herpes outbreak he's like i don't care i'll eat you out and he was like i'm invincible he never he's a cokehead he's that is so cokie to be like yeah i don't give a fuck give me your fucking sores

but he ended up getting like double ocular herpes yeah like he would have like like weepy crusty it was i mean he know he took chances in life it looked a lot like the double vagina now have you ever done cocaine never i've never done any drugs outside of weed and alcohol He took chances in life. It looked a lot like the double vagina. It kind of did. Now, have you ever done cocaine? Never. I haven't done any drugs outside of weed and alcohol. Now, I did have one experience with coke that was not in high school more recently. It is not good.

Yeah, I don't like it. It is not a good drug. It is not. How would you feel like? It is like. It's lame. It's loser. It's a loser drug. It is not How would you feel like It is like It's lame It's loser It's loser drug It's so lame

But it's so addictive Like I don't Why do you think it's addictive Because it's so not a big deal Of a high Like you're not like It sounds like a good idea And then you're doing it

And it's like I think You just keep wanting more When you do it Because it's not good Yeah it's not good It's not ever like a thing I don't think it's good either

Is it a high Or are you just really amped it's a high like you'll probably like be happy to talk for a long time but like i think like something like adderall is a much better high yeah i don't know it's like just go to adderall where it's like a more like contained thing and you can actually get stuff done has anyone does anyone ever like do coke and then get their work done? Or are they just like coming up with ideas? Like Wall Street guys do that. Yeah.

Finance bros do that. Like I've heard of that, which seems insane. I just, it was making me so sad. I was like, I was like, this is what it is. Like I just did a little bit, but I was just like, this is like what people die from. It's like, this is how they feel. And then they die. It's like so sad. Well, like compared to like things like molly like molly seems way more fun oh oh molly is molly is fun molly is like a fun what is this thing there's a there's a grinch somewhere this thing there's a there's a grinch somewhere this is a weird line it's a it's pain here you just i can hold okay that is very weird that's a look right i think it's in backwards like

these are supposed to go on this side well okay so cocaine just feels like icky like it's like it's like you're my for me it's like my voice and my body are going at a different pace so then i don't even like talking it's like i love to talk and it's like sucks to have all these good ideas because i'm all like oh i got a coke idea and then uh i can't even express it's just so i don't like it all i think about the whole time i do it is how i can do more yeah like literally i'm just like i can't wait to do it more of it and then and then i just feel gross the next day and yeah it gives you like a bad hangover it's also by the way snow that's why it's on this episode snow well i'm wondering what i'm curious to um if you were to

ever be inclined to do this is coke ideas one page coke when you're next time you do coke write everything you're thinking next time you do weed write everything you're thinking then ketamine then acid then mushrooms and compare each version of yourself i used to do that when i because i used to experiment with drugs a lot and what the mushroom ones and like acid notes you can't make it you have no idea what i was just writing but it made so much at the time i was like this is amazing it's just doodles well it's like sentences that don't end and you know and yeah and they're like it's not in a written like a regular way and it just makes no sense it's stupid here's a spider's webs on different drugs oh wow i've seen yeah marijuana caffeine benzadrine i like the marijuana one it just stops working

falls asleep yeah that one just looks like a lazy half web and benzo one's just like erratic it would be like that's like coke and then the chloral hydrate is more like coke like i don't need a home like i don't need it yeah what? Yeah, very, very not ambitious on chloral hydrate. I feel like the normal person is very ambitious. When I used to smoke weed, I would always, even though I knew it was destroying my life, I'm not saying that for other people, I actually think it's very good for the one that sits there. But the one who shall not be mentioned but does sit there um you're talking about s right okay i just slap you we don't mention her my wig flies

she's jewish it's the christmas episode we do not bring her up um but i would do like little things like i would do i was taking like a typing online typing course not i didn't pay for it i just found an online typing course that's so cute and i would do it over the pandemic isn't it cute i like i like when you tell me like you do drugs and then you say things like 10 seconds after like i took an online typing course yeah i'm always trying to get better well that's why i don't like drugs like coke and stuff i like i'd like to do drugs that are like making me better yeah yeah that are like helping me figure stuff out or whatever which coke is crazy it's just i guess i just like you know it's like it's glamorized like in the 80s type thing but it also is always and people die

i just can't believe that's what people died from. I don't like being around it either. I think sometimes it's hard to say no to for me. But also, I don't like, like, if I'm not doing it, it's usually not a good hang. You don't like being around people. Yeah, it's like everyone's, like, got, like, foamy mouths and crusty noses and it's nasty. Yeah, it's usually not a good hang. It's just not the pacing.

It's like when you're in it, you're like, oh, this is the pacing. And when you're out of it watching, you're like,'s just not the pacing it's like when you're in it you're like oh this is the pacing and when you're out of it watching like that's not the pacing yes you think that maybe someone molly too though watching people on molly is like they're all like rubbing themselves you already have like a natural energy about you do you think that maybe someone a little bit more subdued and kind of like low energy would enjoy something like coke a little bit more eyes people get addicted to it so they must but i don't don't recommend it it sucks do not do it i don't think it matters what your energy is it just takes over you completely like annie and esther doing coke i think it would have the same effect they would both just start talking like crazy and feel like shit later yeah it's just not a positive like i feel like even with like ketamine even though i've been known

to probably do it too much but i always then know i do it too much and then stop doing it because because it's one of those things where you want to like you want to reap the benefits of it you know you want to have like the moment where you're kind of feeling good again and then yeah but with weed i would do my typing class because it's like a timed thing you do like the f and the h or whatever i don't fucking remember but you know like you'd work on like your different like because i never i skipped that class because i used to get headaches so i never did typing class so now i'm like it takes me so long to type yeah especially with oh the nails it's a wrap it's you should writing for the roast i was like okay i'd have Todd write all my jokes. I was

like, Todd, type. He's like, just give it to me. I'm not letting you type this. It's so annoying to watch. But I was so much slower and I just couldn't get stuff done. Because I think I was trying to convince myself that maybe weed does have a benefit for me. Maybe it does help me. But whatever the medicine is in weed is not a medicine I need. I'm not like ailing in the way that weed can help you right so it did not but i was always just trying to find one thing that would be like okay smoke weed that's helping you and i never could yeah i want to smoke more weed but it ends up making me depressed yeah it's like when i don't have it i think that's like when you were saying earlier you end up

smoking every day for five days yeah because like there is there is a calm down especially if you don't if you stopped you see your tolerance is already so low yeah and then yeah and so it's better for me if I pretty much just stay away from it every once in a while if I'm partying I'll like smoke part of a joint yeah I had to just give myself like um it's same with cigarettes like I have to just be like I just don't smoke because yeah I get so and I think it's from smoking cigarettes too. Like I love smoking joints, but I don't necessarily like being high, but I don't want to smoke cigarettes. So then I might smoke a joint and then I'm like, oh my God. And there'll be like times where I was smoking like CBD. I was like, you know what? I have to just like in those moments where I'm feeling like I want something like chill with myself and push through it. But with you, I feel like you're going through a breakup, a life transition, all this stuff. And you already do the things that other people do to get out of that funk where you exercise and you take care of yourself. You already do that.

So you don't have that to use as like a thing to sort of change your your life a little bit because i think it's good to always have like especially as comedians and um i'm sure for everyone in their lives it's good to have like new kind of phases like you shift your yeah you're not doing the same thing every day juicy um you've been a part of Bad Friends for how long now? Since June. It was right around my birthday when I turned 32 in June. So I don't know, however long that is. In the event of a drowning and you could only save one,

would you save Bobby or Santino? Bobby would flow, look at him. Yeah, his name's bob look at him well man that's i would i would think i think santino would would want me to say bobby oh that is so not true not true at all i feel like and bobby but if you save bobby he would also like to fuck with you be like you should have saved santino bobby would like fuck with you if i saved santino and bobby lived he would kill me at night he would kill me

but also santino has more life i would be saving him and then i'd feel something grab my leg you'd be done in this time to be like i brought you into this world i'll take you out yeah he always likes to remind me how much he's helped me yes i mean that's a wonderful thing about him he's like there's no one more generous but there's no one um more um there's no one who loves to remind you more about how much he's helped. Yeah. Than him. Yeah.

I love it. I'm very grateful to both of them though. They've, yeah. There's been like a, we joke about it too. There's been like a bidding war almost with like people bringing me out to feature. Yeah. It's been really fun. Like a great part of like a great journey.

I remember when you first started with Bad Friends, Bobby was like, I just have a feeling. I'm not wrong about her. I just have a feeling. This is even before you were on Bad Friends. And as soon as you did the first episode, he came back and he was like, she fucking killed it. I knew it. I fucking knew it.

Oh, I got chills. That makes me feel so good yeah his approval is exciting because from what i've heard he doesn't like a lot of people he hates everyone yeah so it feels like it feels i don't know why that it shouldn't feel good 10 years into knowing bobby i found out we'd been in a war for 10 years that's right that's right that's interesting well you guys a one sided war thank you so much for tuning in to our Christmas episode we hope you have

the most amazing warm cozy holidays and if it is depressing that's okay too don't do coke don't do coke by the way

don't do it the whole reason we're bringing it up is like don't do it it's fucking lame lame January 18th or 19th 18th

18th she's doing one night only you gotta come go see her at the San Jose Improv thank you Merry Christmas guys bye