Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Baywatch & The Hot Girl Party

Episode Date: June 14, 2022

Thank you to our Sponsors: Sakara - Get 20% off your first order when they go to https://sakara.com/trashtuesday or enter code TRASHTUESDAY at checkoutTruebill - Cancel unwanted subscriptions with just a tap at https://truebill.com/trashtuesday Nutrafol - Go to https://nutrafol.com and enter promo code TRASH to save $15 off your first month’s subscription + free shipping BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at https://betterhelp.com/trashtuesday Subscribe! https://bit.ly/HitOurButtonsOfficial Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/2QDAi8XTrash Tuesday Podcast iTunes Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TrashTuesdayPodTrash Tuesday Podcast Spotify Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TTPodAudioTrash Tuesday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday 0:00 Welcome to Baywatch5:55 Pamela Anderson & Carmen Electra10:59 Esther Gets Advice From Tyra Banks15:14 Bobby Lee Comedy Store Checks & Fancy Credit Cards17:53 Soho House & Raya Memberships25:38 Esther Went to a Cool Hot Girl Party28:00 Fighting Procrastination & Following Though33:50 Obsessing About Body Weight46:47 Bobby Lee is a Big Tipper52:59 Our Embarrassing Parents1:01:07 The 2 Minute Rule1:02:41 Having Babies in a Lesbian Relationship1:04:13 1950s Tips to Look After Your Husband1:10:30 The Joy of Cooking1:13:00 TV Show & Movie Watching Etiquette 1:14:18 Worst First Date Spots  Listen to our other Podcasts: TigerBelly - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/tigerbelly/id1041201977 Meanspiration - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/meanspiration-with-annie-lederman/id1475056491 Esther Club - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/esther-club-with-esther-povitsky/id1494518220 Follow Us: Khalyla Kuhn - https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk Annie Lederman - https://www.instagram.com/annielederman Esther Povitsky - https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster Produced by: George Kimmel & Bryce Hallock - 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: Pete Forthun & Carlos Herrera Editor: Andres Rosende

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That's B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com slash trash Tuesday. I am doing standup dates. Check them out. Esther on ice.com. I know I'm coming to Austin and DC and I'm adding more estheronice.com for tickets. Hey guys, I'm so excited. I'm going back to flappers and Burbank. It's going to be one show. We're going to pack it out, sell it out. I'm going to bring all of my friends. It's going to be so absolutely amazing and fun. Last time was incredible. I cannot freaking wait. Draw on your

abs. Get yourselves ready. Come see me. You never know what's going to happen. Things got crazy this last weekend. I've had so much fun. I can't wait to see more of you. I'm also going to be next weekend, the following weekend, after this weekend, the 24th through the 25th, I will be in West Nyack, New York. I cannot wait to go. The flight was so expensive. Please show up.

I literally can't believe it. It was amazing. And then I'm taking July off. But then you can see me again in Austin, Texas, Springfield, Missouri, Homestead, PA, Pittsburgh Improv, Tempe, Arizona, Colusa, California, Casino, Kansas City, Missouri. There's a lot of dates. Go to my website, Annie Letterman dot com slash shows. There's many more. I can't wait to see you. It's more fun than I can even express to you Esther you look like you um borrowed your babysitter swimsuit to be here today I was a guy I just want to say that Annie, the moment you walked in today, things changed for me. Well, hold on. I, and Kalilah, you will, you'll always be my number one. You'll always be my first.

Oh, thank you. But Annie, today, wah, wah, wee, wah. I'll be your last. We're going to have sex and I'm going to choke you too hard. You're not going to make it. Pamela, you're here. I did. choke you too hard you're not gonna make it Pamela you're here I did

can you see my eyebrows on camera I tried to thin out my eyebrows can you tell uh yes Carlos let's see yours

yes wow has the best body of all of us so we can slow slow it down just like run from here yeah like David Hasselhoff

we'll slow it down. Just like run from here? Yeah, like David Hasselhoff. We'll slow it down. That's our intro. Like Carla, it's so weird that a guy has the body that I want to have myself. You're getting there. Don't worry. Thank you. You guys, welcome to the Baywatch episode.

Is this what this is? Each pound you lose in those tits, you're getting closer to Carla's. Esther was like a triple e before i have to admit that i have never seen baywatch and it was your idea to do it yeah because that's so esther that's so esther but obviously we all know the iconic looks i'm just like hungry for you today i wish that you saw baywatch because it was epic did you used to watch it i yeah i watched it that seems like what like the only show that the philippines got well that and rescue 911 oh rescue you remember that and the gary enactments right yeah and the gary shanling show okay and wimbledon wimbledon was a show no no like oh yeah we got all the grand slams in the philippines oh um It's pride month.

It is. Oh yeah, congratulations. Happy pride to you, Esther. Oh, thank you. Carlos, have you been getting extra shout outs this month? No, not more than usual. People love you. There was a guy in the audience.

I was in St. Louis. I had so much fun. There was a guy in the audience who was with a girl but he had a little bit of a Carlos vibe but I didn't want to say anything you know and then eventually he was like I'm gay girl and I was like

oh my god I didn't want to like I saved that for Carlos and everyone erupted into laughter I sat out of cars like I'm not gay and everyone laughed but I just want you to know the world's with you thank you I helped with the laugh, too. And then I signed this girl didn't have knuckles.

She was born without knuckles because I always ask people if they have any deformities they'd like me to sign. Yeah. So she had missing knuckles and I drew little hearts and on one of them I wrote, Carlos needs a haircut. I saw that. I reposted. Yeah, I saw that on our Instagram.

That is really cute. Bring me your knobs. Okay, so Esther, you'd never watched Baywatch. No. What do I need to know? There are a few characters that were iconic, which is obviously Pammy. Yes. Yes, Pamela, whose name was...

I watched her later show. CJ. CJ. CJ. I wasn't going to show her. CJ, then David Hasselhoff. David Hasselhoff's son, who is that guy, Jeremy Jackson, Hobie. Then there was Yasmeen Bleeth

Yasmeen Bleeth was on it Nicole Eggert yeah Nicole Eggert who was famous did you watch Charles in Charge she was the hottie

on Charles in Charge no I know everyone was about CJ but I really thought Nicole Eggert was it for me oh she was my favorite

100% she was so hot and then I'm the Stephanie of the group. Yeah, Stephanie. We're actually technically Stephanie's, but we've really squished it together. Stephanie was just a random. Athletic, short-haired.

Short-haired. Wait, was Jason Momoa on Baywatch? He was. Jason Momoa was on Baywatch. The last, like, not in the early years, right? How many seasons did it happen to? And Carmen Electra. Carmen Electra was on.

Later on as well wait i can't look at jason momoa oh shit he's so cute this is crazy wait i don't know if i've told you guys this on the show before but so you know how dave used to like work in late night tv which is so what on the carson daily show yes yeah so random did it three times you'd never know he told me that one time he heard from one of the late night producers like high up like letterman all the like just like knew about all the shows that the only guests who ever moved the needle ratings wise were two people pam anderson and carmen electra of course that makes sense so when those bitches were on they got more viewers and like so

that hot being hot is all that matters. I mean, really, when you think about it, like Jenny McCarthy's crushing it still. And she's probably the one that's still the hottest. Was she on Baywatch? She wasn't, but she was, Carmen Electra was on Singled Out too. So that's why I went to her. She was on Singled Out, but she, but they were like. I love the Jenny McCarthy show.

I guess Carmen Electra actually came out with an only fans recently carlos will you sign up for it i will it's fine will you beard sign up for carmen electra's you know who we had on our on tiger belly was um um dave navarro oh yeah and they used to be just they were married yeah well they were married for a minute and i think bobby went to their like co-bachelor, I think. Like back in the day when it was a show on VH1. I think it was on MTV. MTV or VH1.

I watched it. Me too. They had a bachelor bachelorette party. I remember they like invented that. Bobby Lee was there? Yeah. Well, he's friends with Dave. They've been friends forever apparently.

And I was, you know, in high school just getting fisted by the wrong people doctors brothers wow teachers oh wait so many of these people ended up getting so much attention that they ended up becoming like drug addicts and having to go to then they're probably on celebrity rehab and stuff too so weird to get this type of famous like pamela anderson that thing coming out must have been a fucking nightmare for her. What thing? The sex tape? Well, obviously the sex tape.

But then when they just redid it on FX. Oh, no, it was. She spoke out against it. Like she didn't. They shouldn't have done it. Neither Pam nor Tommy wanted that. It's so crazy. I know.

I saw Britney being like triggered online. Britney Furlan a little bit. Well, who wouldn't, you know? I know. I always think about her during that. Yeah honestly like i feel for her like everyone is just again revisiting people that didn't even know what happened right right no one needs to go through that emotional turmoil like yes for our entertainment and if you're not making money off of it that's way worse the rule is post-mortem right like when everyone has passed

you can do that but for for regular people to like interpret your story and put a spin their spin on it and then people consume it and say hey this must have been the truth even if you put a disclaimer like hey guys this is you know not accurate people are still going to be no one reads the disclaimer that is so messed up well i have a question what would you would you rather be dead and forgotten or would you rather something like that people liked about you but you didn't like about yourself be brought up after you were dead i have no opinion i don't care dead and forgotten there's something so poetic about just going back into the soil and being nothing and everything yeah like that is the ultimate for me that's good yeah i think it's beautiful to just i think my answer is better i have no i don't care

why are you being competitive when you're in the ugliest of all of the swimsuits today really of all the days to try to compete with her she looks so much better no i don't mama guys i brought a skims because i just had a feeling because how were we going to know if these were going to fit us right and a saggy swimsuit is not okay for me you guys we didn't get to choose the swimsuits um they were given to us by production and production couldn't know listen i'll defend production yes for once and for all now i was watching your tiktok because you're the only one i follow i'm just getting on tiktok guys by the way fucking follow me it's so embarrassing um but you met tyra banks yes so i um i give up i can't

be as hot as you guys forget it it's okay there has. There has to be a Jewish person on and represent it. It's just more like how dirty your hair is. Like there's so many other things that are disgusting about you. I fucking put oil in it to look like I was at the beach. It just looks like I didn't shower. Okay. We all have different tactics to be hot. Esther, you're meant to have people, to pay people to take care of you.

You know that. Thank you. Yes. This really is like another example of that. You should have had hair and makeup wardrobe for this. This was your idea. Esther, or you could have just showered and come in with wet hair all right let me tell you she's never gonna shower putting oil in her hair is way more realistic so a couple years ago i was at an event

and tyra banks was there and i was like she's just standing right there and she could potentially be the key to unlock like me being hotter and i was like i just have to take the risk of asking and so i went up to her and i was like hey like how can i be hotter in photos like you seem like you would master i love and she she like thinking that she might just be like weirded out who knows gotta take the risk she looks at me she goes let me see your phone i'm like here you go she's like let me see pictures of you show me pictures of you she's looking through all and she goes okay relax your jaw like what she's like and then we take a photo and i just go like this like and it's the best photo i've ever taken it's a it looks tongue in the roof of the mouth

i think i just my mom's Korean mother you are corpse hot so anything you can do to look a little corpse-ier it's because for me like I I need to add more jaw because I have like

less jaw but do you think she was saying that specifically to you like you are a contestant on America's Top Model or was she saying it to like that's what everyone should do

she was giving me specific tailored advice but it's for my face how would you feel if you found out she had said that to like every other person would that hurt uh it worked for me so that's fine okay so you know what i've deduced from this situation is that the role i play in your life when i'm there is i'm the

one you push in to talk to the person for you i'm like the buffer in between so if there is a rejection i take that but if there's a a go ahead then you can come in yes like we're we're this is why i always say like we're good wing women for any situation for each other for you i need i need that yeah because i'm the quiet mouse who's going to be like you know i'm never i would never never dare ask but that makes you look cool though but that makes you look cool because you don't read like a mouse in any way. So you're just so hot that you're in the corner like not saying something looks like you're like the best. Thanks, Annie. I'm really just like, you know, suffering.

No, I know, but that's even better. But that's even better. So you suffering, there's like a pain, but it's kind of making you like, you're thinking you're like, you're like, I was molested. Or you're like, my shoulders are big. And you kind of do like the model hunch yeah well a couple of my co-workers at abercrombie um were on america's next top model and one of them actually won her name is salisha and can you pull her up salisha she's beautiful but salisha yeah and i had a friend who was i was a little bit closer to her name was Meg. But everyone at Abercrombie was either.

And, you know, there's everyone in L.A. basically. But Abercrombie especially, they were always in that reality show Next. Remember that? Craig Conant was on that. Someone from my work was always on an episode of Next. That's so funny. Put it that way. That is like when i was a fucking loser

eating cookie dough watching trl after school i would have dreamed to know someone on next that is so cool yeah so she won that remember the fifth wheel that was a good yes that one was that on like for us it was like channel 13 while i was at Fox or something like that. I think it was Fox. Yeah. Mine was 29. But I can't remember what the storyline was. They just put five people in and then two people paired up and then one person lost, I guess. Yeah. But what did you win in these?

Nothing. You didn't win anything. Yeah, because I think Craig Conant said he made, like, 15 bucks or something. What? That's what we get paid for a set at the comedy store. It's up to 20 now bitch she doesn't even pick her checks up do you ever do that how fun that that was like a goal in my life was to not need my comedy store checks because i remember bobby would come in and they

would hand him like a stack that's probably like ten thousand dollars worth and he just didn't give a shit at all and that's when he first told me when i first was in the office with him and i was like oh my god you have that many checks he goes yeah he goes you need your commissar checks i i'm gonna um expose him he doesn't he doesn't do that because he simply is too lazy to mail him mail it to his accountant so for the past 10 years all of his checks i put in a big envelope and i mail it to his accountant because they're like it needs to be accounted for so um you're getting taxed on it I may as well put it in yeah and so it's like you know this boy sometimes like I would and in the beginning he needed the money you know what

I mean like he'd come home from like a gig and there'd be like a twelve thousand dollar check there and I'd be like hey like you need to give this to your accountant. You know what I love about that? And he'd be like eight months old. And he would lose them all the time, right? Because my business manager makes them mail the check to them because they know that I'm not going to get it. Like, and if I do for some reason get it,

they will send a messenger to take it the next day. Like they know that I will lose the check. And a lot of times the messenger will get there. Todd will be the one there. And he'll call me like, what do you, what are they here for? And I'm like, oh, the check and a lot of times the messenger will get there Todd will be the one there and he'll call me like what do you what what are they here for and I'm like oh the check's actually in my car and I have to send a messenger again I have the same right but yeah relationship my dad would always say like you need to keep your money organized like in my wallet because I'd never have had a wallet he'd be like you don't even know how much money is in your wallet. Like, that's such a bad sign.

Like, I think we got to be more careful. Does your, does, is Carlos your wallet now? You just go like, put this in your pocket. Okay. I do have one of her credit cards. Yeah, that's not untrue. Carlos. What kind is it?

Just a Chase card. Oh, wait, can I just tell you we were on our, we have like a chat thread with like Whitney and like Kesha and Amanda, like all these like powerful women olivia esther whitney's what did she i don't know how we saw what kind of credit card she had no she like flashed her credit card or something or she said what kind she had yeah i don't remember and esther was like we have to get one of those and i was like esther i've had one of those for like six months. It felt so good. But what does a fancy credit card do? It's a bigger spending limit. Oh.

I just have a policy against an annual fee. So I won't pay an annual fee. You've got to grow up. Yeah, but what if the annual fee is... You've got to stop this nonsense. That's ridiculous. How are we going to get into Solo House? I'm already a member.

That's so funny. They're like, who are you? He's somebody. I'll take you, Annie. Downtown Soho House. You do the downtown one? Yeah. WeHo's one is just like so 2014.

I want the Malibu one that's completely separate. Oh, yeah. They have a couple of those. I have a policy against Soho Houses. Why? Because you can't take pictures? No, just because it's like who the fuck cares you want to be special i'm sorry carlos like you want to be you want to pay to be viewed

as special it's kind of fun yeah i i guess but i've always had fun going i've never been a member of it but i've always had a good time it does feel fun when like my agent or like aquafina was in town she had me go like, it is fun. Like, well, then here I come to Soho House. I'm open to being to my mind being changed. I want to see what's so special. I just wanted to take girls there. It's like the easiest thing in the world.

I've been to every restaurant in West Hollywood, Hollywood, whatever. And I was just like, oh, this will be a new spot. Wait, are there good looking people there? Of course. Yeah. Okay, that makes sense. There's one thing about my membership. people there? Of course. Oh, okay. That makes sense then. There is one thing about my membership. I've been a member for like four months.

I've never been. See, but that's even cooler, right? To be as hard as you. That's how to find the right girl to take. Except if it's Planet Fitness or what was the thing that robbed you of your membership? Oh, by the way, they have a collection agency coming after me for that.

But it's like, I don't want to pay them. Like it will just fuck my credit up. So at this point I just need to pay'm like but it's like I don't want to pay them like it will just fuck my credit up so at this point I just need to pay but it's like so annoying I'm like you guys scammed me I want to sue them I'm going to tell my business manager to sue their asses wait so Carlos are there tiers to the membership or it's just one flat out no there are tiers there's under 27 which is

they want you get a discount yeah it's just for like hipster wait under 27 age if you're under 27 years old oh i love that i know it's shady that is shady todd can't get him get that anymore that's just like how raya does it with like young hot models i feel so bad for women who who want to be on raya i just want to scream to them like it's just for guys to fuck 21 year old models it's not for us it's for ben affleck it's not even for like me it's so rude are you on raya i've been on it like i've been on a bunch on what you've looked at scroll no i'm a member of riot like i had the membership and everything but

it sucks raya's not good well i met girls on it, to be honest, it's hard to compete with Ben Affleck, Leonardo DiCaprio. It's like Matthew Perry or something. How can I compete with Matthew Perry? You guys, I love Saqqara so much. I can't believe they're sponsoring us because I really, truly feel they're the ultimate hot girl food. When I was shooting season two of Alone Together and I had like no brain power energy i just had my sakara my healthy hot girl breakfast it's all plant-based you ever leave it in your sakara you have to refrigerate it later um but i really agree like feeling your best starts with what you eat and also what i love

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guys right to your door skin food delivered to your right door it is crazy sometimes like after I eat this, people be like, what's going on with your skin? And I'm like, I'm doing it from the inside out, baby. And right now, Saqqara is offering our listeners 20% off their first order when they go to saqqara.com slash trash Tuesday or enter code trash Tuesday at checkout. That's saqqara, S-A-Q-A-R-A dot com slash trash tuesday to get 20 off your first order sakara.com slash trash tuesday what are some things you discovered on your phone that you didn't know you were paying for for the past three years okay um definitely like fitness apps that i literally never touched but somehow was subscribed for years um embarrassing stuff like like this app i once subscribed for that like was brain games like oh i fall for those all the time yeah and i it wasn't until i started using true bill that i

realized how many things i was actually paying for that i never used a lot of times i'll download i just fall for it when something's like oh it's only a dollar 99 but then if you look at the fine print it's like it ends up being like 10.99 that was just the trial I have apps like editing apps um I have a lot of those brain games which is so funny because you're the dark place you're in when you download those apps I know we're like I'm dumb this is gonna make me smart and then five years later you're completely broken you're like who's the idiot no no i need to look at my true bill today you guys on average people save up to 720 a year it's because companies make subscriptions so hard to cancel but true bill makes it incredibly simple just link your

accounts with true bill and they will cancel your unwanted subscriptions in one tap and your true bill concierge is there when you need them to cancel unwanted subscriptions so you don't have to you know what it actually helped me with it reminded me that i had a i had subscribed to spray tans that's pathetic is it pale pale one only because i think you look so beautiful naturally because i have a spray tan no you look disgusting you guys you don't need six different anime streaming platforms just fyi one is enough you can just use my netflix kalilah right and you know i still have i'm still on your um peloton you are haven't used it but i'm on it no people say this is the best financial app they've ever discovered like it's changing people's lives and you guys we want to say to you don't fall for subscription scams start canceling today at truebill.com slash trash

tuesday do subscribe to the show though go right now that's free thank god go right now truebill.com slash trash tuesday it could save you thousands a year you guys the club that i went to this weekend didn't have food which means to me oh my god everyone's going to be in a blackout because they're going to be have no food in their stomachs when they oh when they're drinking yes and i was correct so the second night i had this guy that picked me up from the airport who was so funny this guy ron he brought me two loaves of bread and butter and i had it just stashed on the stage and then when people started heckling me i started throwing bread at them and this one girl wouldn't stop talking she was very sweet she was like a fan but so i felt bad but she was just so wasted

when she stopped talking so i went and i just crammed her mouth filled with bread oh mama bird it was so it was i'm gonna tell you assaulted an audience member well she would have been kicked out she was very lucky to be there. But I mean, she should have been gone. But then I walked this other guy. I wouldn't stop talking. So I went and he like opened his mouth and I just balled it up and put it in his mouth.

It's so good. Videos to come. But it was. I'm into that mama bird vibe. But I was like throwing like a frisbee. Like you've never felt power until you've shoved someone's mouth filled with bread. You guys, this weekend I went to like a cool person party and like i saw vids yeah so i didn't where were they

i on my instagram story i i gotta unmute her i like it's a different world out there like what was it? Tell me. I was at a party and it was like some, like, through my, like, fashion cool girlfriends. But I didn't know that hot people, they'll just, they keep their pools really hot. And then at, like, midnight, they all get in the pool and, like, get naked. And, like, I'm like, this is really happening. Were you wearing that swimsuit? I refused to get in the pool. Well, obviously, your pubes are done she flashed me in the bathroom and i was like this is like the least

surprising thing i've ever seen i've never seen you without a bush to your knees i made the feminist choice today and i have a lot of fuzz but you know i saw your um growth pattern and mine is similar i just handle it as a choice look how much is it yeah do you really get it though like inches down the leg i don't believe that i used to and then i got a couple i i got like only a few um what do you call it laser sessions once and so it's not like fully gone but it's less than it used to be i want to get full laser but i think i figured out what bush i didn't know what type of bush i wanted so i didn't want to get laser yet, but I think I figured out what bush. I didn't know what type of bush I wanted, so I didn't want to get laser yet. Because it's forever.

What are you considering? I'm considering, like, because I used to really like a triangle, but I don't know with the way you are, I don't want you to think I'm, like, hitting on you. Like, I like the little Dorito, but I think I want, like, a longer, like, Dorito. I like long Doritos are good. I like when the pubes come up high on the, like, Dorito. I like long Doritos are good. I like when the pubes come up high on the, like, here.

So, like, I like it. Oops. We're about to see it. Like, up to here. Yes. And not, like, too skinny, but not too thick. I actually really like pubes on women. Yeah, I don't want to go.

Yeah, I don't like nothing. Astoria, are you a little nervous? No little nervous no i'm like thinking about it i know that like no pubes was like had its moment i never liked but i agree i think like tame it's just so hard for me to ever have that because for me it's like all or nothing because there's so much there's no taming it you never just put a little product in give it a little uh side part a little tease i'm i'm impressed with how all of us like well kyla has always been evolved you and i've been children evolved what i'm the least evolved person i just pretend pretend she has a better no offense actress a better actress. No, you are so much more a grown up than me and Annie. No, that is untrue.

We have projected. She's like, she gives mommy off because you give baby off. Yeah. And you need her to be mom. The dynamic is between us, you know, it's not. She's better at homework than us. She's Asian. No offense.

You guys are amazing. But I am a big time procrastinator. I'm somebody who has like that kind of avoidance okay where it's like if someone tells me what to do i will make sure i will never do it okay so i have been working a lot on my procrastination and the thing i was listening to today the florence scoville shin thing today was saying um or no wait this was a jim fortin thing i was listening to it's Jim Fortin follows podcast it was that procrastination is you're breaking your word to yourself so that's you don't have self-integrity which is low self-esteem dude yes it's low self-esteem I've been hearing this

my sources tick tock but like yeah when you keep your word to yourself that is the only way to build self not the only way but that the only way to build self-esteem. Not the only way, but that is a key to building self-esteem. And I've worked on that for myself a lot. Like, I used to always, okay, I used to be like, I think I'm going to work out today. Like, I don't know, I think so. Because I never believed in myself. I was too insecure to say, I'm going to walk today.

Because I was like, well, maybe I won't. But also think about what exercise is, right? It's giving to yourself. It's being good to your body. So it's true. That is how I always tell people. I was like, you don't have to do this. You get to do this. Right. But you're good at that. Like there's certain things, but I'm not. So I realize now why I always take like a mental health dip when I'm not working out. And it's not because I feel bad about my physical self. I feel bad that I said I would and didn't. So you're correct. I did break my promise to myself.

And then that's like something you kind of want. You're craving that. Like we're addicted to feeling that feeling of like letting ourselves down. Also, I distrust my own head in that moment where I'm like, I set out to do something that I ended up not doing. Then I don't have a full trust in who I am.

Exactly. So your self-esteem becomes low and what I have to remind myself is it's all up to me if I want to go for a walk it's up to me no one can stop you know unless there's work or whatever but like so I can say you know what today at three o'clock I am gonna walk and I and like believe it and do it yeah that he he was also saying today on the thing I was listening to is like that you um like if you are there's a study that if you if you have to go into work every day and people always have cupcakes there for you if you make the decision before you're presented with the option if you make the decision in the morning like I'm not gonna eat this or before you go the morning, like I'm not gonna eat this, or before you go into the office,

like I'm not gonna have the cupcake or whatever, I don't know why I brought up cupcakes. But- Cupcake gate was a thing. I know, you have to eat a cupcake. On the show apparently you do. You have to, you have a problem. Maybe you just get heartburn from it, you don't like it.

That if you make the decision before you go in, you have like a 50% higher chance of following through. Because if you think about it, someone else had said, I don't know where I heard this. It was through one of these million of things I listened to. But it's like, if you,

committing 100% is actually so easy. It's committing 90% is so hard because you have that wavering part where you're like, ooh, should I, shouldn't I? If you just make like a, this is like definitely gonna happen. That is my problem with working out as well. If I feel like I cannot give balls to the wall effort, then I feel like I shouldn't do

it at all. And in regards to procrastination, it's an all or nothing. In regards to procrastination, the other layer for me is the perfectionism yes i have that too well i will not start something that i know i might not execute you know with excellence and then i keep saying today is not the day i don't feel like i can really you know even though 90 80 75 20 10 is fine that day a little bit is fine anything is fine that day but in my head it's like i like the pressure the pressure. The pressure then forces me to be like, you have no choice. Now you have to give 100 now, now, now.

Right. And then you're hard on yourself if you don't. Yeah. And then it all falls apart. Perfectionism is also a thing I've been like really trying to focus on. And I think because it does, it gives you like that failure to like even like launch off and like failure to even you get like paralyzed sometimes if you're trying to be too perfect because you're not going to achieve perfection that's impossible but perfectionism comes from um feeling like people won't love you if you're not perfect and that makes so much sense

if we think about like how you were treated with the swimming and stuff yeah so it's like it's all that so all of those things are love you have to give yourself so it's like we have to train ourselves to say to ourselves things that feel weird, you know, about how we love ourselves. We believe in ourselves. Like I, you know, like I love working out. Working out's great. It's good for my body.

I feel good. Like you just have to keep like talking to yourself in a way that makes you actually do that. I agree. It's always shocking to me that the nicer I am to myself, more I get done the more I'm productive the more I'm a better worker it's when I'm hard on myself like you didn't do this that's a that's a disaster yeah I then I'm worse and like but it's so hard it's I'm always fighting the instinct to be mean to myself yeah me too it's hard to be mean to you like it's hard to be like today you can just be easy but if i but it's weird then i would

actually be more productive if i said yeah easy today i don't know i will say that the brain is fucked up i thought i i you know i have these uh food restrictions for my tmj diet that i'm on and on the road it's a little bit hard to follow those but I just haven't been worrying about it I've just been trying to make good choices and when I don't I don't like shame myself or anything and I was like not gonna weigh myself because I was like oh what if I like gained weight or whatever sorry I'm talking about weight guys I know this is hard for you but um I so then I like weighed myself and it was crazy I weigh less than I did since i like gained weight in the pandemic because i just stopped like i'm not like clinging to it it's just like whatever

i have to say like intuitive eating personally like i obviously eating disorder passed and all that lifelong binge eater um i the scale they call her the scale is not my friend no oh yeah no i i would i usually like don't own one also it's not accurate it simply isn't accurate you're there have been many times where i felt the strongest most ripped most lean and have been way heavier and it just doesn't match like you should go by how you feel and if you know that you know you're generally doing things right by your body fuck a scale i don't own a scale bobby um after he relapsed and he got sober he bought a scale because it was one thing that yeah again fixate on it was almost control control and i had to move it downstairs because i'm like you have two choices i move it

downstairs i'm going to throw this thing away i know it's brand new from bed bath and beyond but and I had to move it downstairs because I'm like, you have two choices. I move it downstairs. I'm going to throw this thing away. I know it's brand new from Bed Bath & Beyond, but I cannot have it here. Well, because it can start being fun, like where you're like, how much does my shit weigh? And you like weigh yourself before the show. Oh, I do that. But then you get two, like then you're like thinking number.

Are you kidding me? Here's the thing. So when that weighing scale was there for a couple weeks, that's exactly what I did. I would only weigh myself after a massive shit. No other time. And really early in the morning. And making sure that I hadn't even had water or banana.

I'm like, I'm back to my bullshit. How quick was it for me to be back to my bullshit? I will say that it did help me in this circumstance just because I went into it. Just the emotion around it, not the actual act. The feeling of going into something going, Oh, I have dread around this experience, like, Oh, I'm gonna look at this, and I'm gonna have gained so much weight or whatever. And it's like, I, you know, then I did

it. And I was like, Oh, this is fine. And it's nothing. And but it really doesn't, it's never indicative to like, your health, really, unless it means nothing, because everybody has different body composition. Yeah, different. It literally means nothing and you just get older and you just change too it's like if i look back on if i were to weigh the weight that i weighed back in the day when i thought i was like needed to lose five pounds or whatever when i was young i would look like shit it would just not look good on me like i just don't i just really i liked how i gained weight in the pandemic like it seemed like the right thing i don't know oh yeah it felt like good do you know what is also so heartbreaking which i hope this like i wish there's a way to

put an end to this but like when i look back at my journals from elementary school from middle school from high school i'm literally writing down weights and goal weights. There are numbers in there. And that is so sad. Was it something you saw in school? Was your mom really into losing weight? I think it's family oriented. I think it's family.

We forgive them. We love them. No, but I think it's also like culture yeah tv movies actresses like people you date friends and literally like the worst of it was and i love i'm still fans of these people but like the nicole richie lindsey lohan when they would like go out and be stick thin and like again that's that's i don't i don't judge them but that was a part of the culture was like that was the ideal beauty standard for a moment. Also, when Nicole Richie was big, was she not the funniest?

She was so funny and so beautiful. I remember when she was doing something. She was meeting with a trainer on something. And the trainer was mad at her because she ate Taco Bell on the way in. I was like, I love this bitch. That's so funny. Well, that's what I used to always like. When I had gained weight in the pandemic, I was like,

I feel like I'm getting a little funnier through it I mean this is all made up in my head but I was like I didn't have that much of an initiative because I didn't feel like unhealthy so I didn't have like an initiative I wasn't like trying to lose weight or anything and I was like this is funnier and obviously my abs drawn on is funnier the bigger I am I just the biggest lesson to me is like or my biggest takeaway on this subject is like and it sounds so cheesy and basic and easy to figure out but like it's just how you feel how do I feel in my body how do I feel like in I don't know in my clothes whatever it yeah it just feels so good to like remember I talked about a little while ago when I was like in yoga and I was looking at my, I like decided to like be in front of the mirror and just accept myself, sort of guilt around it just not having guilt and not shaming yourself and just like living in the moment

of your life feels so good and I've really I get like help for that like even last night Carlos I'm sorry I didn't tell you this no I'm just kidding I had a small bowl of ice cream and popcorn after what together in one yum after a big dinner i went to the movies which i had i had nachos i had popcorn i had all of it i really respect that combo because it's savory and sweet you have to alternate the best of the best yeah it's like french fries with um milkshakes oh god they're good my brother's wedding had that oh so good really but like i ate that and i was feeling really guilty and i noticed that when I was feeling guilty about it it was making me want to eat more and so I really had to be like Esther what you did

was okay it was normal and then I like just had to tell myself to feel okay but the more you feel the shame and the guilt the worse you're gonna do it's and you'll probably even give yourself like physical pain too you know you're gonna give yourself like heartburn and stuff. Just thinking like, it's just love yourself, love yourself. You just got to be like, I love myself. I love myself. It's so simple and it's almost embarrassing how simple it is. Speaking of binging, I binged this weekend and I loved what I binged on because I discovered

something new that I was probably very late on which is the the ritz um um cream cheese and onion little oh yeah um i had dusted a whole bag and then went out and got another bag and i'm telling you this morning before this swimsuit episode dusted another half a bag and it was delicious guys if we're doing swimsuit i'm going to the movies beforehand look at this you guys i apparently yeah i've had those those are good todd likes those my everyone calls them demon crisps because they those those aren't it toasted chips or maybe they are yes they are that's i just had the bigger bag um really the best thing i've ever eaten um and i'm really proud of myself for discovering a new snack that i can really really dig into i am so proud to say this podcast is sponsored by neutrophil because all three of us use it

religiously and it makes our hair fluffy and beautiful i was so upset when i went on family vacation and i left my vitamin bag at home because there are other vitamins you can just get at the store Nutrafol is it though that is my favorite that's premium it's my favorite I went to my I've been like dying to do this ad because I went to my hairstylist and she was like in shock she's like it's so much thicker I thought I had all these flyaways she's like this is new growth this is all new hair is coming in. Yeah. I got the seal of approval from my girl and she's been begging me to take it. You know what I love about Nutrafol? I love a product that doesn't promise an overnight fix. I love a product that's like, hey, these are just

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So it's like I'm starting to see the results and I'm really excited about it. You can grow thicker, healthier hair and support our show by going to Nutrafol.com slash trash and save $15 off your first month subscription. This is their best offer anywhere and it is only available to U.S. customers for a limited time. Plus, free shipping on every order. Get $15 off at Nutrafol.com spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L dot com slash trash. Can I just tell you some of the ways my life has changed since I got my mental health in order? I walk every day.

I was able to start my own clothing line. I respect myself. I have self-esteem. And these are all things that would not be possible at all if I didn't seek help for my mental health issues. I have boundaries with my family. Like, I have all these wonderful friends, co workers. Like that is why today we're talking about better help, which is online therapy. It just makes it all of the reasons you wouldn't go to therapy. You don't want to have to

like, struggle to make the appointment. I know I'm one of those people that I struggle with, like, if I if anything's, I can finally get the courage to make that first step. And then if someone doesn't call me back or anything like that, it's a wrap. I'll try again next year. So with better help, it's just easy. It's easy. And you can get matched with a licensed therapist in under 48 hours. On top of that, they have this really cool journal feature, which I personally love to fill out all the way.

Because, you know, in the interim between my sessions, I, you know, I have a lot of thoughts and feelings. And then that way I can, we can refer to those notes. You don't have to try to memorize your problems. And it's hard, you know, they're human beings too, you know, it's, we're burned out. And when you talk with someone about your problems, that's how you can figure out what is the source and the cause and help you address these issues like at the root.

And you don't. So many of the doctor's appointments I've had to go to since the pandemic ended. You know what I realized is the most annoying? Finding parking. You have to get there early. You have to find parking. I hate LA for that. Oh, it's cash only.

Oh, great. I don't have any freaking cash. Oh, wait. I forgot my debit card. Oh, cool. So now you have $40 and I have to come back and pay you. You have my license. Great.

This is fun. And now I'm in prison. Thanks. And now I'm in prison because I got in a fight with a guy. But it's like you can just do it online. You don't have to even show your face to them if you don't want. Better help is customized online therapy that offers video phone and even live chat sessions with your therapist. So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. And that's me a lot of the time. It's much more affordable than in

person therapy and you can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp and Trash Tuesday listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday. That's B-E-T-T-E-r-h-e-l-p.com slash trash tuesday my friend too my friend works with uh a lot of girls with eating disorders she's a therapist and she would always say to me like especially with things like popcorn something like that it's like your body probably really needed fiber or something like if that's something you're craving there's something like in your body telling you to eat that i mean maybe not always but no yeah it could be yeah in the peak of my eating disorder i had people pry food from my hand i would like double fist this one filipino

treat called hopia what is it it's like this round little like filled they're filled in anyways it's a sugary dense treat and i would just be like, you know, as a binger. You're not thinking. You're in this like buzz in your head. And you're just putting everything in your mouth. And you're like, my mouth feels good. More, more. Oh, that looks so good.

And they come in these like rolls. And I would just like, you could see like my, you know, no one was home. Like the lights were on, no one's home. And you're just shoving food in your, you know. There's no stopping. There's no stopping. There's no stopping. Yeah. And it's from one thing to the other.

I mean, in my bad days, like I would go from drive-thru to drive-thru like it was dark. I want to ask you guys something I feel really, really salty about. So Bobby and I, you know, we've been getting pedicures and manicures together. It's our thing. How long? What do you mean? How long have you been doing that? Just always? Just the last like two months. Okay. you know we we've been getting pedicures and manicures together it's our thing how long um what do you mean how long have you been doing that just always just the last like two months okay um he finally agreed yeah so he's he's very much uh um a demanding guy and he's like i want

this i want this he wants gel he wants clear gel because he still wants to look natural so he knows all the things now clear gel i've never heard of that um so it's very his fingers are very shiny that's so his toenails are very shiny he should get his nails done why not um he usually does but he should get him like oh he does he should do what i get oh i am so the way you like your tiktoks are really making me want long nails again but i want to type i never do but i want to so we go to the nail salon. I basically just get a basic, basic pedicure. Basic. Didn't even get a manicure.

I was like, just clean out my cuticles, whatever. Clean out? Yeah, because I didn't want to. What the fuck do you got in there? She didn't want ingrown hair. Yeah, like, you know, the cuticles. Don't try to shame her like she's the gross one. We also, you looked at her.

Carlos, Carlos wasn't even giving you like the okay. You looked at everyone. You're like, can you present yourself? So basically the cheapest package, right? So in your head, like that would cost what? Like 20 bucks. 20 bucks. Maybe max 40 bucks if it's like a fancier place.

Bobby gets his gel up top, his gel on the bottom. And then his bill was maybe like, let's say 70, right? He tips each person, the person who did his feet and the person who did his hands, 50 bucks each in front of the people

who are doing my hands and doing my feet. And then he goes and he says, beat that. And then now I could hear the ladies talking to each other like how much should he tip you how much and we're there together they know like we're there together so now these people are thinking oh we're gonna you know what you do in that situation you give them 51 dollars each just to have the clout over him i i i was going to tip well anyways like i think i'm a

generally good tipper but i fuck that pressure that he just put on me i was in a fucking rage that i had to tip 50 bucks to each person that did mine on a 40 bill but i had to i had to at that point right yeah there was no choice like it would have been better honestly it would have been a better move his to do it after you'd already tipped to then shame your tip on top of it so i should have been 51 then i would give like a tiny bit more i'd be like you can't win this bobby but i will go right into those power moves with bobby bobby's power move man but it's not about i will go right into it with him i don't have his money i don't have his money that's a lot of money yeah well i would when we left i would go you owe me a hundred dollars yeah that is interesting like do you need to strategize about with tips beforehand with people

like because you know when the bill comes and you split it like i i'm always like what are what are we doing like let's let's get a team you know dependent i just have found it doesn't i don't look at other people's tips because it doesn't matter like they're are we doing? Like let's get on a team, you know? Codependent. I just tip fat. I don't look at other people's tips. Because it doesn't matter. Like they're not going to like remember which person it was or whatever. Unless we're like recognized by them. I'm also referring to like years ago.

Like I don't think I really go out to dinner with people anymore. Olivia took us out to eat. Did I tell this on here? I want to do a post about it. She took Todd and I out to eat when we were like so broke in the pandemic Olivia Munn and she tipped like she bought she had already like paid there was some they wouldn't let her tip like really fat on the regular bill so she had to buy like a water bottle from them too and then she tipped them like a thousand dollars on the water but it was so oh wow and then she's always like you haven't posted about it huh Annie I'm like Olivia I'm getting to the post yeah it's just so funny she's always sending me like when other people get

i feel like that that whole story just made esther like tighten up and clench a little bit no i i think i we all have different financial situations oh listen i'm not dropping a thousand dollars i'll give someone 20 bucks on a taco, though. It depends on my mood. It's like, am I feeling the vibes and stuff? I don't always tip people that fat. It's just, I always try to tip over 20%, though. Just from being a waitress. Anytime I have family members come into town from the Philippines,

that's the first thing. That's the first talk I have with them. I'm like, this is a tipping country. Yeah. Like, you have to tip. And it's just, because there's so much like lost in translation in regards to tipping you know it's just different rules for different countries sometimes i feel like when i'm out to dinner with my parents like i have to like hide the bill and what i tip were

you there that time when my mom was like looking at the receipt and like pretending yeah she had some like weird maneuver but yeah like the receipt was in the middle of the table and she acted like she wanted like more chips or something and was like oh this is here i'll take a look it was very oh my god i went out to eat with my ex boy my parents and my ex-boyfriend's parents okay and he had a stepdad and his mom took out like a second job so she could send him money poor boy okay he was had failure to thrive but he that's a real thing he really did he really did and i you know he seems to be happy now he got a motorcycle thing with babies failure to thrive he had he just his dad passed away when he was little and he just was he was a chat he had some challenges in life but he um his mom was like secretly supporting him because his stepdad didn't agree with it.

Because, you know, I think it does like enable the kids if you do it for too long or whatever. He was 30. But she was pretty much like paying his rent and sending him money and stuff. So we're at dinner with his family and his stepdad goes, I'll get this. Thank you so much for covering his flight. So his mom had like lied to his dad and said that my dad had covered his son's flight oh my god and so my and my dad just had to like take it my dad's like oh my it was just so awkward like we're all just like oh my dad was like oh and i was like i

just had to like grab his hand and be like do not whoa that must be hard. Like, I don't know. Yeah. Also, I have a question. At what point do the parents have to meet each other in a relationship? Like your your boyfriend's parents and your parents met and had dinner? Like, what are the rules in regards to in-laws meeting each other for the first time? Like far in do they meet only if it's serious i lived with him so it was like yeah that's serious also my family i have like dated so many guys from new jersey for some reason todd's from new jersey my family's in philly they're gonna move to new jersey soon so it's like your family's moving to new jersey well my parents want to move they want to move closer to the boys oh yeah when did uh your parents meet dave's parents not for a while because they're we live in all live in different cities i think it wasn't until we met um i brought my parents to cape cod

for a vacation and then dave's parents met us there and we had like a night or maybe like an afternoon together um you know i'm always very embarrassed of my parents, like being around other people. So I'm always very on edge when I'm around them just because like they're just a liability. That's how Dave feels about you every time I've ever seen him. Correct. Correct. I feel like I was in no rush for that to happen and i don't think there is any rush i don't think you need to rush that i think you need to be so secure because i never want to be in a position where i'm dating someone and i'm like are my parents gonna blow this for me yeah i need to be so comfortable and confident that there's a common feeling because like our parents are

gonna embarrass us too at some point like i just know that thank god for my mom's um language um barrier because i can just blame it on that i'd be like well you know there was if she says something really like you know off color i'd be like well you know english not our first language but my stepdad roger he's a loose cannon he's just he cannot be trusted he's he's so lovely he doesn't take things personally ever so he assumes that other people won't take things personally he has a memory of a freaking walnut like it's like seven seconds so he doesn't remember what he does who's like rough you know feathers he's ruffled he's just like what's up sweetie you know like he's such a happy go lucky guy that I'm just like i can't take this motherfucker nowhere see i love crazy parents that's the thing like i i'm just in i have like

some sort of embarrassment and fear of my own like but i love being with them when it's just me and it's like a safe space and then i love other people's crazy parents like if your parents aren't crazy like i'm out yeah like i want chaos like i want them fighting like i want i want to laugh at any crazy thing they say to me that's so entertaining i'm safe and comfortable my my dad i don't know how to even explain what my dad does he does he holds you captive like he you tell him information and you're happy to tell him my dad's so funny i tell him any funny story that happens right and then he has this information and then he'll like, he'll dangle it. Like he's going to tell the person you told them.

Like, it's so funny. It's such an adrenaline rush. It's so fucking funny. It's like such a prank, but it's so fucking deeply humiliating. Like, okay, so I had a boyfriend who his mom came to visit us and we were living in a studio apartment together. friend who his mom came to visit us and we were living in a studio apartment together and uh we were laying on the bed when she came out of the shower and she was wearing her robe and she was talking about one of his cousins and how she had always been very butch so she got up and she was she we were laying there so she was like waist level to our face and she showed how like every

time you put on her dress she would just hike her skirt on and she pulled her without realizing she pulled her robe up and exposed her bare vagina to us okay who did this my boyfriend's mom my ex-boyfriend's mom i love her and she went like this she was like okay and our faces were right like we're snatch level and it was great it was a beautiful vagina cuter than mine a little annoying um my favorite level snatch level baby that's what you're that's your height your snatch level you are snatch level you're my look she's snatched at snatch level thank you but um but my boyfriend like when he goes ma like we're like oh my, like we're like about to just like explode. It's like the funniest thing that's ever happened.

Right. But she didn't notice. She didn't feel the gust of wind. She was completely oblivious. So I had to like elbow him, like do not fucking tell her, like just let it go. Like she could never know because there's no jurisdiction on that humiliation. There isn't. If she found out 10 years later right now that that had happened, she would be mortified. Yeah.

So I tell my dad this story obviously because it's so funny right i tell my parents my dad loves it we're at dinner with them and he keeps being like past the same like he's just having the most fun yeah can you pass the pink fish like i mean just everything he was saying was like i was like dad i'm gonna kill you but he didn't he didn't release the info our dads are so similar i know they should get together because i feel like they might fight but they'll eventually get together they would never fight are you kidding physically um whose dad can beat up i think your dad could i don't know my dad has balance issues my dad is so thin my dad's dead

let's go let's go i'll bring it yeah let'sume him. I'll have his corpse fight your dad's. My dad did. Okay, so my downstairs neighbor, stop me if I've already told this story, was very like, I had had friends that lived in that apartment before we moved in and they were like, she's really annoying. She can't stand like just walking around. She gets upset about all the sound and stuff. Who does?

It was a downstairs neighbor. And so when I moved in in knowing that i'm way louder than the people that were living there before i gave no access to this woman like i didn't let her feel comfortable to come talk to me or anything i was very cold to her because i'm like we're not going to make it through i cannot be less loud than i am but so my dad i tell him that and my dad gets high we like smoked weed And my dad starts stomping on the floor. He goes, no fucking bit. I was like, dad.

Oh, my God, dad. It's not like we've ever discussed that I'm loud. And I'm like, dad, oh, my God. And then when we were leaving, the windows had those glass slots that they have in the old. So it was open. Jealousy. It was open. Isn't that what they're called, the old so it was like jealousy it was open it's not what they're called the windows they're called jealousy they're called jealousy oh i love that but so we had the jealousy pains and my dad like pretends to look and he goes oh she's

fingering herself but it's like fully it's fully open so i'm just like oh my god so i'm so embarrassed i'm like dad i actually live here and he's like laughing he thinks it's the funniest yes the jealousy yeah and um and so i just told him i was like well I'm just gonna tell her you're senile like if it ever comes up I'm gonna say I have a senile father and that's on you love that but it was so that's what I've grown up with my dad just my whole life at risk in his hands that the only thing that makes me think of is like the time my mom picked me up from school from in middle school and it was halloween and she was wearing a witch costume oh it's so embarrassing i'm like this is too but that i will say was almost like my vaccine against

embarrassment like once that once my mom showed up to pick me up in front of all my middle school friends in a witch's costume. On Halloween, though? Like, it's so appropriate. But when middle school, you're at that age where everything is embarrassing. Queens are hard, yeah. And I was like, what? I just was wondering how you would feel if your mom went to drop you off at your swim team and then was also in a swimsuit and on the team.

Because my mother did do that, yes. I'm sorry. She joined our swim team. No, she did not. She joined our swim team no she did not she joined our swim team yes she did and she had pubes like yours it's so fucking embarrassing i was like mom you're supposed to shave your hair and she yeah she swam there was a 15 and you can pass them out there was a 15 i thought you were gonna be shirtless for the banana break. Put a banana in your pants too. I'm not putting a banana on my pants. You would.

Shut up. He's always like no and then does it. See? Yes. Ew. Have you ever heard of like the two minute rule? Oh yeah. I like that one.

It helped me for a while and I forgot it was something i implemented and then i went back to being just have it but two minutes if it if it only takes under two minutes do it like if you're like oh i gotta wash the dishes um but if it's two dishes and it'll you know it's not gonna take more than that then you should just commit to the under two minute rule i was thinking um the sorry it was the five second rule where it's like when you you want to do something like you're like oh i know i have to like go take a shower i'm just thinking of something hard for you um or like i have to go clean this thing or i have to go work out i've committed to working out you just go you just count to five and you just have to do it and then you get up and do it i can't remember the name of the woman we should have depression doesn't really um the depression does not allow me on some days it just really no this

is like a fucking massive boot on my neck and i know i can have that's the worst part about depression is that i can still have all of these ambitions and things that I know I want to do but have no physical desire to actually get up off of like from bed one thing that's helped me is that I allow those days to happen now I don't have depression so I know that that's not doesn't work for everyone but I will have days where I have all these ideas in my head of all the things I want to do but physically I'm just out for the count and I'm like that's fine like I'm just gonna let myself have that um I don't know what made me think of this but I have a question for you guys like let's just say there was a world in a fantasy world where you were in a same-sex relationship committed like that was

going to be your person would you ever want to do a thing where like if you were going to have babies that you would get your eggs out essentially like i would carry your egg baby and you would carry mine and then we'd like that that feels like such a wonderful way to like have two women have the same baby i think people do that so you're each other's surrogate it sounds like it sounds like sperm scissoring honestly what's that like it's a scissoring of you're like you're like swapping yeah it's it's a sense that like i got you pregnant yeah yeah you know my egg is in your body yeah that's kind of cool but you just sit at home and think of these things no i just look at your chest and think of them this is my two

pregnant stomachs i just want to uh assure you though esther we could scissors you and i all we want and that's nine there's no pregnancy no you have to do the what you annie's has them available so i could carry her baby anytime i want a quarter asian boy You can get up to half. Wait, you want the half? I want the half. It's such a hell what I did. That was so hard. That was a really hard experience. People don't really, I mean, I guess some people talk about it.

Are you fully recovered? Yes. Okay. That's amazing. Unless I have to use it as an excuse later this week for some reason. So Carlos brought this up. Tips to look after your husband. This is from.

I didn't bring it up. Tips to look after your husband. This is from 1950s. This is from 1950s home economics book. Is that what this is from? Yeah. Have dinner ready. Okay. Thank you, Todd. Todd is the best husband.

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Okay. That's very Mrs. Maisel. That actually is great for anyone. Just take 15 minutes before you see anyone. Yeah, refresh. Bird bath. Oh, did it say a bath?

No, I think. Oh, I hate this, this one. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the house, through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives gathering up school books toys paper etc then run a dust cloth over i literally think my mom read this and like it yeah this sounds like this is my mom your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift to i hate this i'm so the reason i hate this i'm so uncomfortable i want this for myself what the reason i hate this. I'm so uncomfortable. The reason I hate this is because I want this for myself.

What? The reason I hate this is because I want this for myself. Same. Of course. Instead of having to like. Come over to my house. But this magazine is training women to be servants. Okay.

Let me see. Minimize all noise. I'm out. I'm out. Some don't. Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner. Okay, we'll go up a little bit, Carlos.

But it's funny. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day. I'm so sick. Prepare the children. Listen to him, guys. Listen to him. Make the evening his. Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or other forms

of entertainment instead try to understand his world of strain and pressure his need to come home and relax the goal try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit i just can't imagine being like a like stay-at-home mom dealing with the fucking kids all day and then your husband comes home and not just being like, you scumbag. You weren't here today. You weren't here. You weren't here. You know what makes me sad?

Is that somewhere, somehow, I learned this. And this is exactly how I've been in relationships. What? Yeah. I've always cook. I always freshen up before someone comes near me. I always, Well, I mean, I do a baby wipe to the vagina, you know?

The vagina, but the ass first, ass to vagina. We know how she wipes. Some version of it. Get a little poo-poo in the pee-pee hole. I clear away the clutter. I always clear away the clutter so it puts one in the stink and two in the pink no one in the pink and two in the stink i'm wait so kalilah but come on you know you never complain it was put in my head that i was useless like what a shame you are if if you don't know how to cook but that applied to both men and women growing up it wasn't just a woman thing because i a lot of my male um cousins and uncles everyone cooks yeah but it's

more like you have to know how to cook i'll say this when i do get energized and like make things tidy and you know make a turkey wrap and do little things like that i feel good i like it but for me what's triggering i think is like that this isn't a magazine and this is like what they were telling women to do that makes me so uncomfortable for some reason yeah it's it's horrible because now i feel like mostly i do these things for myself when somehow it was maybe initially put in my head that it wasn't for myself so i'm confused about yeah if this was like how to treat yourself at home would be like that would be better yes but also this is why

bitches burn their bras after this like things went crazy in the 1960s people went nuts they were like fucking everyone growing their armpit hair out

like yeah they rebelled don't worry we took care of it you don't have to be triggered by this thank you but I do want to do this

for myself oh my god Carlos is trying to cancel himself you know what this actually they're not wrong about this because I have put my

bear pussy on Bobby's face while he plays war zone and he is not like and he just will not flinch he's just like he'll just move his head to the right of my pussy have you ever dated the guy the guy that i like i always felt was gay that i dated in college who was married to a woman and his kids but i'm like gay men would like reach out to touch him and i was always like not yet he if that was a mirror that would have been him wait wait wait a second annie you guessed another guy was gay but you were wrong and he it's i'm not wrong he's definitely gay every gay man approached him wanted him everything he made a choice to repress that and have children and okay and live a comfortable life. A choice. Happy pride.

Happy pride. And pray the gay away. Do you know they still have those camps, the pray the gay away camps? Oh yeah. Jesus camps are real. But I mean, I guess Roe versus Wade's getting overturned. What is anything?

We're going to start having to do the 1950s wife. But don't you think that is something that might come back into style? Conversion therapy? No, that does exist. Yeah, I know. It still does. Yeah. Why'd you get quiet?

Like, I know. I mean, I heard about it. No, I wasn't trying to like make a joke about it. I thought you were saying it would come back into style as well. No, but I'm just saying what if like the 1950s like housewife would come back into style i feel like there's women out there betraying all of us who are doing this yeah but wouldn't it be nice to know how to cook though it would be like i like it is just like a skill set for survival no you know what our challenge is we should all be our own 1950s housewife let's fucking do that for ourselves well that's what i've been literally thinking in my head i want

to do that like i want to become i don't want to no that's the trash tuesday 1950s housewife challenge here's what i'll say guys like the whole cooking thing i'm an advocate for people learning how to cook yeah only because like i find joy in cooking for myself and obviously dark times ahead just in an apocalyptic world let's just know how to throw a fish on a grill or something like that and i wonder if these jokes are gonna help hey guys don't kill me always there's always been a jester throughout history so you guys are good um i yeah no but i for me i think one of the reasons i don't like to cook just because my mom did cook but she didn't seem to like enjoy it like it wasn't something that i looked at but her her mom enjoyed it. So I think that's how she learned. But I think like because I have ADD, I don't even want to label myself with ADD anymore

because I do think I can transcend it. But time management and stuff has always in the past been like a problem for me. And so I think it's just it's daunting to have to be timing different things and stuff. It's like a little bit. I think that's the reason why I'm not a good i don't bake and i don't enjoy baking because it's very mathematical and very precise and it involves a type of specificity that i don't enjoy like when i cook i like to eyeball things i like to look at what's in my fridge and throw it all together and see like what i come up with and if you have a weird thing about time, do one pot recipes.

Just throw stuff into a pot and you don't even have to think about time. You just kind of have to look and be like, oh, and then taste. Is it ready? Is it not? Like trust your instinct. I like that better

because I think another thing is I'm like anti-authority. And so it's like, I don't like the recipe. I'm like, why are you fucking telling me what to do? And then I'm like, I have to go to the store and be like, oh, I gotta go down this aisle and I gotta get like five turnips.ips i think recipes are just for me like loose suggestions i look at a recipe i look at the ingredients i always switch things around and i think that uh the chef roy choi teaches a master class on how to like cook from your heart

yeah rather than like from very specific recipes and i think that that's where the joy of cooking comes from i do love like i love watching top chef it's like one of my favorite shows and i think that that's where the joy of cooking comes from i do love like i love watching top chef it's like one of my favorite shows and i love seeing where you you can see because i don't think they're are they allowed to have recipes on there um i'm not sure i don't watch top chef i think like i think they have to just kind of like know what they're doing already but you're so creative both of you are so creative i just imagine you guys like having i've had some creative things they can't have recipes that's the point of the show yeah that's cool that's the whole point of the show i've watched every season of the whole through line of the show it's what makes the show different but you

know what i realized that i do especially with reality tv that i really like and maybe all shows i half pay attention so i can re-watch it and feel the joy of re-watching it again without really remembering what happens like i've watched every season of Survivor three times I have a show pitch for you I think that it will it changed me and Bobby's life is the the Great British Bake Off I find it so boring I think Dave watches that it's to me the most wholesome feel-good show that I've ever I don't know why I couldn't I just was like and Todd will make fun of Todd's funny. You know, I really get so bored when I'm watching something. I, and Dave likes it quiet in the room. I like, hold on, like go back to the 1950s. If you're going to a movie with me, you're getting, you're getting the fucking mystery

science theater joke track with it okay see i would see movies with you because that's what i need a couple forms of stimulation like i want to chit chat like i want to comment it's too boring during a movie i'm either talking and making jokes or asleep i'm okay with that by the way in the movie it's just a little cross talk it's hilarious my dad my mom sat between me and my dad during when we went and saw brokeback mountain because she knew we were going to talk but we just leaned over and made jokes the whole time i love doing that the one thing that bothers me in movies though jenna did this one thing it drove me fucking crazy carl's already laughing she wasn't talking but the brights on her phone she was texting

and like every and it was a movie that i had already watched and i really wanted her to watch like this is the good part and And I could see her kind of- She cannot watch movies. You can't ever go, you can't ever want someone to want- I think that's been a problem. I do that with songs. I'll be like, listen, and people just want nothing to do with you. Yeah, that's your problem for thinking Jenna would watch a movie with you.

But also the phone light, I could see it in like my periphery and I was just gradually like, I can't fucking watch a fucking movie, you know? But also it was distracting me. Yeah, here's what i don't i've never understood why is a date seeing a movie you're not fucking talking to each other it's the worst date ever so you can get fingered if you wear pants to a date night out at a movie you're a fucking bitch you're exactly right so it's only it's only the correct date if you're younger and have no other place where you can be kind of alone's only it's only the correct date if you're younger and have no other

place where you can be kind of alone in the dark intimate in the dark you want to sit in the back you want to make out it's it's like it's a good place to like make your move you know it's like so exciting you're like watching the movie but you're like controversial i do not break bread on a first date i eating is such a joy for me I do not want a new person judging how the fuck I'm eating and I will never have go to dinner like dinner in a movie fuck that's like the worst yeah I me and Dave's first date was well I don't know if I've told this on here but he asked to come to one of my shows right And when we walked in, I saw, I was already so hesitant, but then I saw it was a very light crowd.

And I was like, you know what? I'm not going to go up tonight. And so- So smart, Esther. I know. I really called an audible and it was the right call. And then we went next door to, I think it was Coffee Bean, now it's a Starbucks,

but we went to Coffee Bean and we just had like a green tea and we just sat and chatted and that was perfect. S tea have a public place to sit and chat love that yeah and not i think i know which one you're talking about that's like a nasty that oh yeah that coffee it's like a gross coffee but we sat outside yeah also another thing that people do on first dates which i don't recommend because i've is hiking because because not only are you my pussy smells like shit by the end i've had a terrible hike date i get the what do you try to push you you get the little crust the white stickies on the side of your mouth because you're dehydrated and now you're talking you know you never bring enough water now you're like sharing this one water bottle like don't

drink too much no i've done the mistake where like i tried to eat less that day so i would feel skinny for the date but then you're on a hike and like you're dizzy i'm basically near passing out like so i'm not functioning it was horrible i'm i've never been more confused i've never felt more confused it's a little bit of both the things you like i love chest hair oh yeah i like these i have the um did she just post that yeah oh i gotta post mine from when i was kylie just posted that 35 minutes ago yes i get to repost that look we why are we psychic people that's the same brand as this probably she really just took boardwalk humor and ran with it yeah right she stole my boardwalk humor you know that's my yeah bye guys thank you so much don't be insecure

don't worry about nothing why'd you point at me i am insecure don't be insecure be cool like me uh this was a great episode i had so much fun thanks for coming to baywatch with us see you next week thanks for bay watching us subscribe subscribe we gotta get to 200 i've already threatened to be gone off this earth. Bye, guys. Bye, guys. Thank you.