Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Catholic Showers, Jewish Baths w/ Brandon Wardell
Episode Date: February 15, 2022Thank you to our Sponsors: BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at https://betterhelp.com/trashtuesday Stitch Fix - Get started today by filling out your style quiz... at https://stitchfix.com/tuesday Truebill - Cancel unwanted subscriptions with just a tap at https://truebill.com/trashtuesday Ettitude - Get 20% off your order, plus free shipping, when you visit https://www.ettitude.com/pages/tuesday and enter promo code TUESDAY Trash Tuesday Merch: http://slugfam.com Trash Tuesday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday Subscribe to our YouTube: https://bit.ly/HitOurButtons Official Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/trashtuesdayclips Listen to our other Podcasts: TigerBelly - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/tigerbelly/id1041201977 Meanspiration - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/meanspiration-with-annie-lederman/id1475056491 Esther Club - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/esther-club-with-esther-povitsky/id1494518220 Follow Us: Khalyla Kuhn - https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk Annie Lederman - https://www.instagram.com/annielederman Esther Povitsky - https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster Produced by: George Kimmel & Bryce Hallock - 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: George Kimmel & Pete Forthun Editor: Andres Rosende --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/trashtuesday/message
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annie and i are both doing stand-up on the road and we're having so much fun we want you to come
see us i got a lot of shows coming up and i cannot wait to see you guys it is amazing at
esther on ice.com for tickets the people who come to our shows are amazing traveling is such a
nightmare but seeing you guys is like i i like i don't even know what to say. I will cry thinking about it.
It's unbelievable.
We love coming near a city and eating your food.
That's what I like to do.
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I guess so
I didn't
that wasn't
hello
wasn't my choice
I know it does
is there no Kalai
I guess not
oh my god
we filled in with another Filipino
mm-hmm
oh she
that's a shame that she's not here for this one I know are you half I am half I guess not. Oh my God, we filled in with another Filipino? Mm-hmm. She's almost racist.
That's a shame that she's not here for this one.
Are you half?
I am half, yeah.
What if he was full and it just changed our whole... Yeah.
One time I was like, you look so Asian in this,
and you were like, I'm Asian.
Yeah, that's why.
I go, why do you look so Asian?
He's like, I am.
That's the secret.
Literally known you for 27 years.
I mean, yeah, it's...
Annie, don't plug bad friends.
I'm half, but it's like...
I'm definitely more...
I feel like...
Yeah, I'm like white passing.
I'm white.
I am white at the end of the day.
But I am half...
You're a white man.
Wait, that's like Carlos.
Carlos is white.
But I identify as Hispanic.
Oh my God, it's like George.
It's like me.
You're a white Latino.
You're just pointing out all white people. But Carlos is... Oh my God, it's like George. It's like me. Are you just pointing out all white people?
But Carlos is-
Oh my God, it's just like all our white boys.
I mean, like the world generally receives me
as a white man, but that might change.
Those Japanimation eyes.
Oh my God, me.
I have anime eyes.
I have anime eyes.
I have beautiful Disney princess eyes.
We can maybe zoom in and post.
You really do. But yeah, I am, yeah. I have beautiful Disney princess eyes. We can maybe zoom in and pose. You really do.
But yeah, I am.
Yeah, I mean, well, maybe after the Joe Coy movie comes out where I'm Joe Coy's son.
When you're Joe Coy's boy.
People will be like, okay, yeah, this man's, this is a Filipino boy, you know?
I feel limp.
I feel this feel limp to me.
Filipino man.
Wait, this is what I love.
I love Carlos handing me things.
It was $4 and a block away.
And I want to make sure George pays for everything.
I want George to fund, Carlos to deliver.
Yes, that's the key.
Okay, wait.
So Brandon walked in and literally the first thing he said was,
I have to tell Annie she can't bring up the time that she saw me crying.
Oh, I said I'm going to bring up a time he cried.
And he's going to be mad because I brought it up every time I've ever seen him.
It's fine.
It's fine.
We can talk about it.
We can talk about it.
We can talk about it.
No cuts.
How about this?
How about we're not going to talk about it and you guys just have to deal with it?
No, we can talk about the time that you saw me cry as a high school senior.
I've known you since you were such a baby boy.
You were talking about getting your dick sucked by yourself in the shower.
Wait, how did you know him when he was in high school?
New York?
Well, she was living in New York at the time.
I was living in D.C.
He was a D.C. comic.
But I would come up for stuff sometimes.
And he was like the boy wonder comic in D.C.
And he would come up.
And now look at me, a former child prodigy.
You kind of are.
Yeah. When did I meet you? Being an ex prodigy. You kind of are. Yeah.
When did I meet you?
Being an ex-child star.
You still look young though.
I still look,
I still play young.
I mean,
Esther knows.
Esther knows about,
knows all about this.
It is weird that you guys
are alike each other.
We have some similarities.
You're way more youthful.
You and Andy,
you guys and Andy Milonakis.
When did I meet you?
Probably like 2015 or 16. So you were, when you moved here? I moved to LA. Can I meet you probably like 2015 or 16
I moved to LA
we met earlier
do either of you have
Crohn's disease
first of all why
people look young usually
when they have Crohn's disease
that's the wrong disease
type in Karen Margolis
type in Johnny Pemberton
I'm right
and you're wrong
does Johnny have that
and look up
yeah Johnny has Crohn's
I will call my friend
right now
who has Crohn's
and tell them
they look old
yes
Esther you're a bitch
I will
I mean Johnny
Johnny was playing
high schoolers
deep into his 30s
I think he would
could still do it.
He's got longer hair now.
It's working.
How old are you in Joe's movie?
I play a 17-year-old boy.
Despite being 29.
I'm a 29-year-old man.
I'm a 29-year-old man.
I play a 17-year-old boy in this movie.
And I will be...
I had this thought on set where first day we're filming,
it's like the dad is yelling at me, you know, like, oh, you have a C plus in math.
And like my internal monologue is just like, I'm going to be 30 when this is on demand, you know.
Tell them about, do you remember the counter I made for your birthday?
Oh, for when I turned 30.
What? He was doing like old people jokes
and making fun of people for being old.
I was not. I think I was maybe just being
I think I...
You were trolling. You started the troll.
The troll.
Yeah, you're kind of an OG troll. Are you going to troll us
today? No, no, no.
I'm on my own
business.
I feel like we do have hits. Our are hits we got lost hiking oh we did get lost i mean it was it got dangerous yeah what's going
on between you guys it felt like uh maybe that was like yeah i know and now i'm into half asians
oh okay my boyfriend's okay that's the twist i'm we mommy son you would be jealous
so jealous i had there was like one there's uh somebody i well i'm not gonna say names but
they're they're nicky is um was it her song no no no this is there's there's somebody in comedy who I was hooking up with that is, I think, seven, seven years older.
And I found out later that she used to be a substitute teacher at the high school that I went to.
At the high school you went to?
While I was there.
I think it was like a secondary school.
So I think I was in eighth grade when she was a substitute teacher.
And then years later, we both were just sort of at the same shows and and you know and things happened things
happened you know but I don't know you don't you guys put the you do you have you never had a rule
against hooking up with comedians what kind of question is that what it's not because some people
do some people do it was was loaded. It was loaded.
He's like, I know the fat pigs you've dated.
I know the monsters.
I know the pieces of fat garbage you've dated.
No, it's not that I didn't have a rule.
It's I just, you know, I.
They all try and she can't fuck them all.
No, I know.
But it's not.
It really is not.
They all try.
It's not it really is not it's not fair it's definitely not fair the being a you know dating female comics versus dating male comics is not
i feel like it's better it's easier to be the boy to be the boy well you get to write all the jokes
and we just sit there and go ha ha you guys are so good he, can we suck her dick? A funny dick? I feel like a lot of...
Every time I suck a dick from now on,
I'm like, is it a funny dick
or an unfunny dick?
There's only two kinds of dicks.
My point was just like,
why are you treating me
like a chuckle fucker?
My point was like,
there's chuckle fuckers out there.
I'm the one that makes the chuckles.
Speaking of dating comedians,
I have something to share.
Whoa.
There's a comedian, a male comic who I think is like my perfect guy and I don't know what to do.
Yeah.
Oh, I want to play a guessing game.
Then do it.
He's definitely hideous.
He just had an attractive.
There was a there was just a there's a Showtime doc About him That just came out
Was there?
No Bill Cosby
Oh I was like
I was like
I was trying to
He's kind of older
He has a lazy eye
I haven't looked him up yet
He's my dream guy
And he's currently
A very popular comic
Do you call him a dream guy
Because he drugs you
And you fall asleep
And dream in a dream
Are you Are you newly single?
No.
No, she's fully engaged.
No, fully engaged.
But on this show, we live in an alternate reality.
Oh, okay.
I'll say this.
I don't think I have a chance with him, but I love –
Is he a little person?
No.
Okay.
He's like a very popular stand-up comedian right now, especially.
Right now.
Okay.
It's a he?
Mm-hmm.
This is where I know it's not true.
Oh, he's gay.
No, Esther's gay.
Tim Dillon.
We're saying he.
Do you have a crush on Tim Dillon?
I do.
It's Tim Dillon.
I get it.
He's my perfect man.
What do I do?
Hmm. It's Tim Dillon. I get it. He's my perfect man. What do I do? Um.
Hmm.
I've got, you've got to work through.
Let's stump Danny.
Danny is, Danny can't, Danny has to leave.
I'm just like, the two of you together is like my nightmare.
When I, when I see you guys, it's like, Esther's like, it's fangirl.
It's like, please stop being.
That's what it is.
I really, I have a crush on him. I'm attracted to him. She goes like, do you think he'll do our, I'm like, it's fangirl. It's like, please stop. That's what it is. I really, I have a crush on him.
I'm attracted to him.
She goes like, do you think he'll do her?
I'm like, Esther, you're being low self-esteem.
It's like crazy.
She's like, he's here.
See, I'm like, I'm starstruck.
And like, he's like my type.
Yeah.
He's like.
But I'm his, I'm his type.
Adam Friedland is his type.
Yes.
I know that he's been on, he's been on record about this. He's been on you. He's been on record. Are. Yes. He's been on record about this.
He's been on you.
He's been on record.
Are you serious?
He's been on me.
Yeah, he's been on record.
Tim has been on record about wanting to fuck me
and wanting to fuck Adam Friedland.
So you would be the, if he liked girls, you would be the one.
I can't believe I'm revealing this on the day we have someone
who is in my spot that I want to be in.
Should we fight? I was going to say I can't believe
you wore those pants.
No, I like them.
Oh yeah, you did kind of come
jammied up.
Jammied up?
These are real pants.
I'm dressed up for her.
They're nice.
It's a fun, fun pattern.
They just look like pajamas because I sit weird. I like, it's a fun, fun pattern. They just look like pajamas because I sit weird.
It is.
I feel like it's a very LA.
I am not flirting.
You're flirting.
I'm in love with Tim Dillon.
She's being really romantic towards you.
I don't know if you know.
That is so fucked up.
No, you're being terribly.
We can take the body language, get a body language expert later.
You're being awfully flirty.
Is it because he's in the Kalilah chair?
She's going gonna sniff that chair
no matter who's sitting in it.
Esther by the way did you buy yourself
a neck diamond? No this is from
my stylist and it's not real. Are you
kidding? But it is I realized that when you
wear a big. I thought like maybe you like like
let your fiance throat fuck you
and he got you like a ring for it.
That's a
really good plan. Put a ring on it. Put a necklace for it. That's a really good plan.
Put a ring on it.
Put a necklace on it.
Tim!
Listen up! Girls love Tim Dillon.
They do?
I don't identify as a girl.
He was on Red Scare.
Oh, I love those girls.
I love them.
Yeah, they're great.
But I feel like they've talked about
Tim Dillon being like a fuckable
man they like a man with authority he's like he is he like is he like is alpha and he does he
is he's like a confident i just like fat guys i don't know what you guys are talking about
i mean it's a bad joke and Whitney was like he's sensitive
I go I'm not worrying
about what Tim's sensitive about
he's called
there's no way he's sensitive
did I ever tell you
I think I might have told this
on here before
but I never told you this
I gained weight over the pandemic
but I was kind of like
in denial about it
like I was like
no maybe it's not that noticeable
this is a beautiful top
thank you so much
now who's flirting
I mean this is
well listen
I was his teacher
my eyelashes are just flinging off and everybody knows top. Thank you so much. Now who's flirting? Well, listen, I was his teacher.
My eyelashes are just flinging off and everybody knows it sends me into a rage.
Would you ever wear
a half crop
top shirt as a man?
No. I'm not
into that kind of thing. Would you ever do nail
polish? What's that? Nail polish.
Absolutely not. I'm on record about
how I think that straight
guys who get painted fingernails i think they're sexual predators yeah they're problematic yeah
they're because it's like queer baiting it's like am i queer maybe you should you should let me fuck
you that's what we should read on the show and it's like yeah guys with colorful fingernails
i think are guilty of gray area sexual misconduct.
Okay, queerbaiting is a thing I felt, but I never knew the term.
I really have had guys where you're like, you get so comfy with them thinking they're gay.
And then they lean in for a kiss and you're like, you just played, you gay played me.
There's guys that are, yeah, they're gay for pussy.
I'm like, this is a crazy, like, it's really like, no, it's's a real thing where they're, like, they act all girly and stuff.
And then you're like.
It's predatory behavior.
Yeah.
Wait, that's crazy.
I, like, have a, I do have, it's funny that you brought that, you brought that up.
I do have a joke on stage right now where I ask, like, oh, are there any straight guys here with painted fingernails?
And if a guy raises his hand, you know, I'll be like, oh, what's your name? And he'll be like, oh, Dave or whatever. And I'll be like oh what's your name and he'll be like Dave
or whatever and I'll be like Dave's a sexual
predator
can we clip just that out
wait that's so funny
well it's I don't
he says that person is a sexual predator
it's like that's my
that's how I do crowd work
no
I call a guy a sexual predator
no I've I call a guy a sexual predator.
No, I've never had a guy where I thought he was gay and then hit on me.
That's never happened to me.
Maybe that's a me issue. It's happened to me.
I've lost my gaydar completely or people have just learned that it's a way to get girls.
Annie, how was Florida?
Did anyone bring you any gifts for me?
I got great gifts.
I wish I remember to bring them.
I got like, I'll bring it next time I got this really cute hat and I did want to shout the girls out but I
can't remember the name of their thing but I will cute earrings did anyone bring you lip scrub for
me you got lip scrub in two cities ago yeah two cities ago did you request sure lips are so crusty
and disgusting that our fans are now intervening. They're getting involved.
They're coming to my shows.
I guess this is the danger of like a video pod.
Yeah, I know.
You're like, you're hidden away.
Well, yeah, now I'm got it.
Now I'm.
Are you getting a gun out of your pocket?
No, I'm just trying to do it.
The world's smallest gun.
So long.
He has like a little pink girl gun.
It just made me want to.
I'm glad that you had that instinct.
Because I was worried. As I started saying, I was like, oh, no, he's going to have crusty want to. I'm glad that you had that instinct. Because I was worried as I started saying I was like oh no. I don't have crusty
lips too. I would hate that.
Do you only take baths?
I'm not a baths guy. That's her.
I take only baths every day. You're only baths?
Isn't it disgusting? You don't shower? No.
If I'm in a hotel room and there's
no bath I will shower if I have to.
Like if I'm there for four days. You're kind of
just soaking in your own filth.'s a misconception because don't you i i've what my impression was you you
go bath followed by a quick shower that's so are you catholic uh not i mean i was at one point okay
i think that's why i think catholic people have to shower more. You're a god boy.
Oh, look at our god boy, guys.
Our first god boy. We have a god boy
guest. I was raised Catholic.
I think
this is a take I have. I think
Catholic people need to bathe more than
regular people. Is that
offensive? What's that?
It's anti-anti-Semitic.
It's the opposite. like they like need their
showers like every time i'm with a catholic person they're like they like think i'm so dirty i just
made a correlation what with you and showers and why you don't like showers oh annie yeah we all
know what it's gonna be i what the holocaust and the. Why would you say that?
I vote to edit that out.
That was very insensitive.
She's sick and disgusting.
She's sick.
What a sick bitch.
Wow.
Esther to be a chosen one and speak that way.
She's horrible.
I'm sorry.
Between her and the God boy over here, what's going on?
I want to formally apologize for the joke I made.
It was not funny.
I'm going to get a statement with the ADL.
Wait, I was going to say, okay, so what reminded me when I said god boy is I think the greatest
insult you can give a girl is to tell her she looks like she only uses pads.
Calling someone a pad girl is so bad. I just want to know why is it so bad to only use pads? Oh uses pads. Calling someone a pad girl is so...
Why? I just want to know why is it so bad to only use pads?
Oh my God, she is a pad girl.
I just want to know why.
Because it's staying on you.
Remember what they would say in middle school?
What?
Girls would be like,
oh, if you use a tampon, then you're not a virgin anymore.
Oh my God, that's very Catholic.
I mean, I went to Catholic middle school.
That was very God-boy. Catholic middleolic middle school yeah girls would say that girls would be like oh if you
use a tampon you're no longer a virgin i can't believe i did to you people guys so crazy i know
if you can if you can love me like this you can love me like this and you look beautiful there's
a flapping eyelash it's going i can it's obstructing my view. Our eyelash budget, we have issues.
George, come fix it.
That was the name of my E! show with Julian McCullough.
We have issues.
Oh, really?
Yeah, E! named it.
We actually have issues with the name.
And the budget.
And the budget.
I had a show for four episodes.
I think I was friends with you during this.
I had a talk show on E! for four episodes,
and they didn't give us a a time slot. Like if you went
on like your TV to try to DVR it, it would
say programming, E programming.
And then
on the IMDB they had another girl's
face under my name. It was so
it was good though. It was like better
than having this hit show.
That's like a flex. There's something that's a
flex about you saying that it's
E programming. You're just flexing like I don't give that's like a flex there's something that's a flex about you saying that it's an e-programming
you're just flexing like i don't give a fuck i love that yeah that's good energy i mean that's
like you know everybody i feel like that's kind of a rite of passage is to have a failed yeah just
being involved in some like basic cable thing that like never really worked out i had a friend i'm not
gonna say his name but he literally quit comedy because he got edited out of a season
of America's Got Talent.
And I was like, I didn't know how to explain it.
I'm like, every successful person has this exact story.
Wait, I think I auditioned for America's Got Talent
and didn't even get past the producers.
They like canceled the show.
We're done.
Iron Man does like a lot.
They're like, I guess America doesn't.
They're like america doesn't
that that he he got further than me and quit no i it's very like uh it was just weird because i'm
like you think there's one there's not one thing he sounds weak of spirit i know let's fucking beat
him up is something preventing you from achieving your perfect life?
My FUPA.
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Do you primarily date women who are older or younger than you?
I would say mostly younger, but not that much younger.
Are you scared to say that because we're like all dried up
no no no
I don't want to insult the
you're both beautiful
what if we just it turned into like a hand job
this is weird why are we jerking him off now
yeah I'm their
stepbrother
brother
I'm trapped help me out I'm like trapped in a trunk um yeah but generally in the same in in the same
range and yeah you don't care you don't it just yeah it just happens yeah it just now
well i just asked that because you dated a girl who was like who was older than you and
like a school teacher and i'm like oh is that something that you got into i mean yeah i don't
it's not like i'm not you're always angling for like i'm not angling i'm not people is so
it's gonna be revisited in your tub that's not what i do when i say
my spanking legs are gonna be straddling the fucking. You don't know my spanking.
It's not like that.
You are misreading my spanking.
It's usually feminine.
I know.
It's actually insulting.
She's calling you a girl.
I do.
I mean, I have the, you know, I have some, I have soft features.
I have soft features like that of a beautiful woman.
It's weird that you kind of, now I'm realizing you look a little bit like my boyfriend i've never we've never had a
you've always been projecting the whole time onto me that i'm flirting and spanking but
look he's your boyfriend he's literally half asian he's too old to be my boyfriend
He's too old to be my boyfriend He's younger than you
It was funny because I never
My boyfriend's 27
But the thing is that I never
Our boyfriend is younger than you
I never
We never were flirting though
No no no
Did you ever feel flirty with me?
I don't think so
No
I was a virgin when we met
What?
And then when we were left
And then after she took care of it
Yeah
No yeah
I hoped you were
Yeah because I was
Weeping in front of the Montreal people
I was 17
I was letting you be 15 in my memory
I was like 17 when I started
doing stand up
and I lost my virginity
at 21
who did it?
oh it's like
fully something
I would tell you off air
wow
fully something I would tell you off air wow fully something I would tell you off air
that is mildly embarrassing was it an escort no no no it's like but it's actually where it's
being an it being an escort would be better less embarrassing yeah wow yeah juicy but the way you
are looking and acting is like you're gonna masturbate to it that is your
no no no i refuse i don't masturbate you wait i feel like that could be real though do you not
sometimes i do yeah oh i can go i could go not without it though i go in phases like i i have
a theory i think everyone is like this where like you go through phases
where you really are like hyped up
and you need to do all you need to get off
all the time and then
other times where I'm just like gates are closed
like I don't need it. Are you
like that or are guys not like that?
Yeah no I think
recently I've kind of
Carlos is taking notes
by the way.
He literally took a note. For the show, not for personal use.
Wow.
It's almost like I didn't say that
and you got really defensive for no reason.
Okay, you're all into projecting now.
I'm trying to see where other people are projecting.
You're rocking back and forth.
I'm doing the Esther.
Esther's always got her heel and her vagina. I never have. She's always rocking back and forth I'm doing the Esther Esther's always got like her heel and her vagina
I never have
she's always like
she's always banging her
fucking yeezys
she's always like
yeah
it's just crazy how
what a hoe you are
even when Kalilah's not here
you're a muse
that is your
no
I feel like Kalilah can make you
squirt why would you say that because it's true why even go there go go there i call come go go
it's just oh sure yeah sure of course just a thing i do welcome to the show do we have those questions oh man i the squirt is squirt piss i think so yes right are you at the end of the day
i've only ever peed on guys so yeah here's one we could all answer what makes you look at a woman
as they walk by is that a bad question what are we doing to this man? Why are we making him?
That was actually more for you.
To look at a woman or a guy?
No, a woman.
It's like, because it is actually a question for women.
It's like, what makes women look at other women?
I saw a thigh gap that I almost went up to the girl the other day at the airport and was like, your thigh gap is like, like a gift.
If we were together.
Like, I can't believe you had, we would have talked.
We would have.
She'd be here.
She'd be sitting where Brandon's sitting.
She'd be gapping out in here.
It was insane.
I was like, oh my God, your jeans never like rub in the middle.
What's the most intimate non-sex thing that you do with a partner?
I know mine.
It's holding hands.
Holding hands to me is so fucking sexual and intimate.
Is it because of how wet your hand gets and clammy
how pussy like your tiny tiny hand is answer the question bitch that's the most intimate thing
that's not sexual that you would do with like a lover i like to shower really shower with oh yeah
that's pretty that's pretty intimate i enjoy i like I like to, I have an open door bathroom policy.
I like direct eye contact while either of us are taking shits.
I like, well, I need to get a, one flaw of my current living situation is I feel like
I don't really have like, I've had sex in my shower, but I feel like I don't have a
sex shower.
I have a sex shower.
Yeah.
Sometimes when I'm like in a hotel, like a nice hotel.
Well, they're asking for it.
It's like, what are you not going to?
It's literally like.
Can you guys sell me on sex in the shower?
Because it sounds horrible to me.
Why are we?
You're already naked.
You're already wet.
You can wash it off immediately.
She likes to keep the comb on herself.
It is.
Don't act like that's not a thing you've actually said.
I didn't respond did i i had no
response i think like yeah i mean head head in either on either end yeah because i got one of
those seats so it's like oh yeah you can go up but my favorite move is because i have one of those
hospital beds my favorite move is i scooch to the end of the bed and then we present my vagina to my
boyfriend.
We just pull.
We bring me up.
I would like to do a real slow one where it's.
There's no movement.
It's just the thumb.
Wait, do you literally have a hospital bed?
Yeah.
Wow.
I mean, they're not.
They're like sleep number beds.
That would be a good way to tease.
Like to tease Todd and be like, I'm coming up.
No, now I'm going down.
You have to stay still.
He's like duct tape to the floor.
No, not even just sex in the shower, but showering together with another person is so uncomfortable to me.
It's like who's under the water.
It's like fighting for the warm water.
I don't.
Yeah.
Oh, I get the water.
It's Todd. Especially if it's you and Tim Dillon. I don't. Yeah. Oh, I'm my I get the water. It's Todd.
Yeah. My boyfriend does. Especially if it's you and Tim Dillon. Oh, yeah. I think we know
who's getting the water. You know.
You could probably be under. It's a lot of runoff.
He's like a fucking
slip and slide for you.
You really could ride him. You'd have to
climb on up.
Oh, my God. Have you met?
Have you, like, met?
Have you and Tim met?
Yeah.
There's a picture of the three of us where it, like, literally looks like a reenactment
of my vagina.
There's, like, one giant one.
They're wearing the same color.
Has he been on?
Has he been on the pod?
No, not yet.
Oh, wow.
Do you know him?
Have you met him?
Yeah, yeah.
He's been on the pod a bunch.
You should have him on.
Oh, what's all this?
This is actually...
Think about not knowing what's happening.
How scary that is.
You're with two girls that are
interrogating you sexually.
I know, I'm sorry.
Yeah, what's going on here?
So, every episode
we take a banana break.
If like,
we just do it,
you know,
Carlos is calling them
these days,
it's like,
because sometimes
tensions are high,
you know,
it's a show for women
and we're like,
okay, we need our potassium
to calm us down.
Yeah.
I wake up to one banana
every day.
You do?
I eat one banana in the morning.
What if that was you coming out?
You're like, I got a banana in my mouth before my eyes are open.
Yeah.
So I start my day off with a little banana.
I like that.
It's a good snack.
It's an afternoon Honeycrisp apple.
It comes with its own bag.
That's the greatest part. I've never heard it referred to as a bag. Yeah, it's like a good snack. It's an afternoon Honeycrisp apple. It comes with its own bag. That's the greatest part.
I've never heard it referred to as a bag.
Yeah, it's like a snack bag.
It's like...
Annie, don't put your makeup in that next time I see you.
This is my purse.
Do not call it a bag.
That's the beginning of a very bad story.
Annie used to use a grocery bag to hold her makeup.
Last time she said this was two weeks ago, and then I pulled my bag up, and it was still a grocery bag to hold her makeup. Last time she said this was two weeks ago.
And then I pulled my bag up and it was still a plastic bag.
Something's never changed.
Sunglasses have gotten more expensive.
No purses.
Do you know what's so like, I don't know what level of wealth you grew up with, but I grew up like cheap.
Middle class.
Yeah.
So in junior high, I really wanted a coach purse and my dad found out and he
said that i should just use a grocery bag from jewel osco which was our grocery chain and just
write coach on it and i'm like still feeling traumatized it's so weird that i am your dad
yeah you're his no you're his dream daughter no but your dad like even like his he has worries
about spending but he has spent and
the way he spent is how i spent you were like you're chicago yeah and you're philly yeah yeah
okay cool where are you from oh dc dc but like military dad so oh really air force air force
dad so moved around a bunch and then i just say dc because that's where I started White man or Filipino? White man Filipino mom
That's good
Classic
I'm just looking at baby Todd here
He's older than him, oh my god, that's so weird
Annie's very confused sexually
You met me as a
child
as a sexless child
You are still sexless to me and I don't mean that to be like...
No, because of when you met me, I think that
you can acknowledge the glow up.
I'm happy for your success with the puss.
You slay it and I am...
Thank you. I am proud of you.
And you can acknowledge that I can...
I mean, at the time, I was like, you know...
You look exactly the same.
Yeah, but I know how to present better than now.
You have like a little bit of like stubble.
Sure, yeah. You're Filipino. You're gonna be like boy for a long time
Until you're just did you say for a long time?
Wrong wrong Asian
Why did you say long Asian?
Esther I love that he called you out on pajama wear,
and I know this is one of your most expensive, amazing outfits.
Thank you.
Well, it's very-
She thought about it for like a long time.
This is a very-
I've been wanting to wear these cool pants for so long.
Let me see the-
Oh, my God.
Wow.
Yeah.
For someone that's a very different size than you.
It is sort of a-
I mean, it is an LA look. What what it's an la outfit this is a very la
outfit but it's not pajamas right it's not pajamas but it is an la outfit in that it is sort of i do
think that there is kind of an la sartorial what's that word trent like clothes why does everyone
that's sitting here fucking use big words it's i do think that
you have the kalilah curse la folks do and this is something that i have been guilty of in my
i think or you know early 20s but a lot of people in la do dress like teenagers yeah comfortable
forever yeah which i've i've tried to like i've never not do as i approach 30 i've never placed
that but that is exactly you're no you're doing this is kind of a just exactly like a father
full dad right that's the that's what i'm going for mom like art teacher mom but the rest is okay
carlos what do you think because i feel like you're like a men's fashion activist i mean i
kind of by the way everyone's freaking out right now. They're like, Oh my God.
Everyone in the comments is watching this and they're going in real time.
And they're going,
Oh my God,
Esther's body is so hot.
I didn't know she was covers it up.
Not that I read the comments.
Portia tells me.
Oh my God. Wait,
I didn't tell you guys this.
I'm locked out of Twitter.
Someone has stolen my Twitter.
They're selling NFTs.
It's so embarrassing.
They're crushing.
Can I see? Do you have it? I can't's so embarrassing. They're crushing. Can I see?
Do we have it?
I can't go on.
Can I see?
Can somebody pull up
Annie's hacked Twitter?
I've not seen it yet
and I've been like
trying to avoid it.
You haven't seen it?
It's not that bad.
Well, everyone else
seems to think it's bad.
Everyone's like,
oh my God,
this bitch is selling us NFTs.
That's so funny.
I'm just falling for this.
Oh, Annie NFT?
When I saw it.
Oh my God.
I was like, why am I Kalilah?
Wait, can we blow this up?
I want to see this.
Okay.
Insane.
And then X out of that.
They've changed the picture a couple of times.
I had a skateboard yesterday.
Let me just see the tweets.
Crypto investor just going into the hashtag NFT space.
By the way, I gained so many followers since oh wow the
thing is i want to hire them they're getting better luck on mine no i literally first saw it
before i talked to you and was like oh and he's having a really productive weekend oh go down go
down this is a wild it says active test is that not so sure they hacked you did they delete your
tweets prior maybe I don't care
I'm gonna blame
I'm gonna blame my other ones
my last one was retweeted in the comedy store
and please go down what else I retweeted
Randy Quaid's Christmas
hell yeah
I named my dog after him I love Randy Quaid
I stan him
oh wow and so then all of a sudden
somebody's posting about NFT discord or my love reading wave. I stay on him. Oh, wow. And so then all of a sudden,
somebody's posting about NFT Discord.
It's like I would do like,
and I would do like an NFT that's not my own drawings.
Like I just do someone else's drawings.
I say lean in.
I say this is the new you.
Oh, that's wild.
It's so embarrassing.
You guys, it's so embarrassing.
No, everyone knows.
It's ripping off my people.
I don't even want to like ever.
But you were never really like, like twitter was never your thing i hate twitter it was back in the day and then once
they started getting canceling people i was like i'm out i was like oh god i really came on here
to do my worst jokes i was like twitter's where you do your jokes that like are kind of mean
right that's where you're like this is this is my uh this is the website
where i use slurs yeah this is the slur website this is the one brandon i feel like you are so
they don't call it twitter i feel like you're so big on twitter but it's like i don't i i don't
touch it that much you don't i don't i leave it alone for the most part where is your i'll pop
in every once in a while remind them I still got it
no because you are super funny on Twitter
thank you
where is
because I feel like that's how I got to know you
where are you expressing yourself creatively
then if you're not using that
I kind of save
it for stand up
and a podcast
or hacking Annie Letterman
this is Brendan Wardell wait I said Brendan it for stand-up and yeah podcast and that's cool or hacking annie letterman i think yeah yeah oh
yeah this is brendan more yeah wait i said sorry brandon but the um the it's like offensive that
they people think that's my back like why would i put like that background trippy trippy visual
i think it's really not as bad as you think yeah now that i'm singing you kind of like
you know what's annoying about it is that you can't
you like that kind of shit
you like that shit
ears like animal ears
the background
you look hot
Esther's like
this is great for your career
I'm gonna buy one
I feel like that's like a pattern
you make sweatpants with that pattern
yes it's tie-dyed
thank you
Esther is behind it
Esther's like
it's so odd
it's so cute
it's so well constructed
people are saying
they really like it
and you should keep it
no I do think
my Twitter account
my like
follows
like they're doing great
they're doing better than me
listen once I realized
I can't put any edge
on Twitter
my tweets turned into
retweets I'm just like any edge on Twitter my tweets turned into retweets
I'm just like I'm on a show see ya yeah yeah I try to yeah I don't like to spend too much it's
it's also like really it's it's different than it was yeah when I was super active on there
and I regret that was like I don't know I went back. I deleted a lot of shit on there.
Really?
Yeah.
It's like there's like 800 something tweets on my account now because I just sort of I was like, ah, just nothing but the hits.
Like anything else.
I know because there were like this forever.
I used to use it.
I don't know if you use it like this, but I would like do it as like a like an open mic kind of like before I would go to open mics.
I would like throw out my jokes,
but they're like horrific.
It jokes about like bad jokes.
I was going to say something that's like a theme of a joke I have now.
I was like,
I have these horrible jokes about,
Oh wait,
I haven't,
I'm still doing that.
It's not the specific joke.
What is this new genre?
That's why I delete my tweets.
Cause I don't want people to know I'm still doing them.
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I have the dark blue.
I feel like I'm in the ocean.
I will say, like like I've looked whenever I'm like trying to write stand up
I'll like have a
and I'm at like my last leg of effort
I'll be like let me see my tweets
if there's anything good there
is that like one minute in?
yeah
and then there's nothing good on my twitter
your twitter's like cute
you say cute things
oh you think I'm cute?
they're like funny and cute
no you're good at it what do
you say what do you say she'll be like no eating a scone oh yeah just finished a scone off to piano
lessons i mean i feel like father is letting me out tonight that's a genre of twitter is just
girls being like famously i love to eat a tiny little cookie. Wait, what? That's like a genre of Twitter.
There's like girls that just-
There's like a kind of like-
Cutesy little like, oh, having a cute little day.
You know what the genre I hate is?
Where it's like girls that are like, fuck boys, be like.
And I'm like, come on.
Oh, sure.
It's like, I never want to see a tweet that other people can tweet.
I don't like that.
Yeah.
I like originality.
Like singular voices.
You'll have to check.
Like, I remember when I would do Twitter, it would'd be like you're like in a race for these jokes that
other people could do if you're trying to stay topical well that's like that's something that i
hate is it is it's yeah i don't want to um it just feels like um yeah a lot of times on twitter
it i mean well most people just aren't on it yeah and so it's like it does feel like kind
of a waste of time to just be like jumping on like oh I gotta be the first person to make a joke about
this thing in the zeitgeist or whatever like I don't want to I don't want to be on there like
oh I gotta I gotta do my joke about Jordan Peterson being on Joe Rogan or like, Oh,
Pete Davidson's dating a famous lady.
Oh,
I know everyone making Pete Davidson.
Like,
I don't want to,
I,
I,
I want to stay out of it.
Do you,
it feels undignified.
It's just sort of like you're ever just going after the,
it's like boring.
And your account just retweeted a Theo NFT.
Oh boy.
Is it Theo Vaughn?
No,
I checked. It's actually just some guy named NFT. Oh, boy. Is it Theo Vaughn? No, I checked.
It's actually just some guy named Theo.
He seems ambitious.
Like you on Twitter.
He's very interested in the crypto.
He hacked you, this Theo guy,
and now he's just assuming you're on his team
because you didn't do anything.
Can you watch my Instagram story how mad I was?
So actually, Theo just called
and he needs you
to meet him outside.
I'm locked out.
You take my car keys.
I'm just trapped standing there.
Wait, can we watch the video
that Annie posts on Instagram
because it's so fucking funny.
I was so mad.
This is true.
You look like you took a potion
in Toontown.
Did this just happen?
Yes.
This happened within the last 24 hours.
It's currently happening.
It's been 48 hours.
No, she just posted this too i
like in the middle of the night was just like tossing and turning like writing my agent like
we gotta get this down but i couldn't see it so i didn't know what it looked like
why did you make your eyes because i didn't want to do my makeup but it makes it so much more
confusing no but it is like it's funny to hypnotize people saying that i'm not the audience sees
sees this yeah sees what we're. These eyes are so awful.
What a setup.
Guys, why would we be in this situation?
Because you're believing that I'm selling you crypto.
A lot of celebs are.
I know, but I'm like, I'm not a regular.
I'm a fucking comedian.
Which is, it does feel like.
I tell the truth.
But you are an artist.
It's like, I was like, oh, Annie's like.
Did you see the Jimmy Fallon, Paris Hilton NFT thing?
No.
It's fucking, it's really depressing.
What is it?
It also feels like they're both doing it against their will.
There's a video of like Paris Hilton on The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon.
And they're both presenting their
NFTs. Yes, they are doing it against
their will. And it feels like
somebody has like a fucking gun to the back
of their head. Everyone
that's talking about NFTs has a gun to their head.
My business manager, my first
meeting with him was like
oh my god, George of course is into
NFTs. Hey, don't be dissing the tiger
of course he's making a fate oh really are you making tiger belly nfts where's our
where is our billboard you your monster it's you will watch the video
reese witherspoon is tweeting about nfts i just feel very something weird is going on listen
i draw listen here's the
thing i draw so i understand why my business manager is like let's do nfts i still don't
understand what they are i'm busy performing in front of people you're like show kanye yeah i
liked that kanye said that me too i liked that kanye did that okay well let's watch it wait
watch this first watch the anger first because this is real. All right. Play from the beginning.
So annoyed.
I have to post about this.
My Twitter is very obviously hacked.
But for some reason, people are believing that I all of a sudden am into cryptocurrency.
You guys, I've never talked about selling you cryptocurrencies.
Please do not follow comedians.
Honestly, let's pause that.
Yeah, you can pause it. What is wrong with you guys it's hacked why would i change my picture into a cartoon with a skateboard on the eyes are you guys kidding me
any of the eyes
it's hacked it's hacked i'm trying to get back into it it's hacked do not be stupid
all right i'm so annoyed that this is happening but i'm more annoyed that you guys out of nowhere
i would just start but also if you haven't spent all your money on the obvious scam
there it is that's how it's done y'all it's the funniest
thing you've ever
done in my life
like it is
the eyes
one part before
it cuts off
where it's like
please don't
follow comedians
I was like yeah
just stop there
great
that's
like what is
going on
but I guess
I did it raw
so it makes sense
damn
it's just like you don't think it would be the Danny
DeVito drawing I've been squeezing
as much as I can get out of you don't think that would be the
NFT the thing I've been doing
the most I can get out
what do you think of Kanye right
now like what's your yay
positive I mean I was at the
I was at that
LA Memorial Coliseum show
you went to that?
How was it? Yeah, yay with special guest Drake.
Drake, yeah.
It's a great way to go over a concert.
I understand why I thought that too,
because yeezy, but it is yay.
I thought the same thing too.
I was once like you.
It was great.
I mean, he did basically all of his hits
in chronological order.
He did?
Yeah, starting through the wire.
He did everything. So you're a Kanye fan?
Yeah, I've always been a Kanye fan.
I didn't love the
Christian era. Oh, okay.
I didn't love that one album that's
mostly gospel. The Wyoming one?
But I like that he is, I think
post-divorce, he's
being horny
again. Wait a second. But him know, he's being horny again. And wait a second.
But him saying that Pete has AIDS is so funny.
It is very funny.
That's very funny.
I thought it was proven that he didn't.
It's one of the funnier things that I've ever heard in my life.
It's very funny.
Whether he did it or not.
It's also funny if people made it up.
It's also funny.
The whole thing's funny.
It is really.
It is very funny to say that your ex-wife's
boyfriend has a it's just like this famous guy i don't know i don't care who it is
it's yeah did you have like a rivalry with pete because you were like the young boys
no i don't think we never crossed paths you were like east side and he was he's new york we've
never we've just never i mean like i think he was new york no i was never but i never lived in new york
but you were with us we never yeah we don't know we don't know each other
yeah so kanye posted my focus is on building real i can't read this by the way i literally
am like i this isn't i feel like my focus is on building that's how i feel every time
i need i can read it every time i do the ads i'm like oh no my focus is on building real products
in the real world real food real clothes real shelter do not ask me to do a fucking nft yay
and then he says ask me later which i think is so funny that's a very funny postscript exactly how i talk to
my parents i'm like do not fucking ask me that right now ask me later who still talks to their
parents like that me it's really bad yeah i i've recently become really a big kanye fan
recently yeah i'll tell you why like where you she copies carlos because carlos got me into yeezys and now i'm obsessed oh wow but you weren't a fan of his music no because i literally i didn't know any of
his music that's why i'm having i'm such a fan now because i'm rediscovering all the music and
i've been asking have you guys heard jesus walks stronger, like literally that's what I... That's her joke. She goes, I just turned 33.
I'm Jesus's age.
Have you heard the song Jesus Walks?
Yeah.
Also, didn't you just like get into weed?
Yeah, I just started.
Hilarious.
You're 33 years old and you're just like,
man, there's...
Have you guys heard Kanye West or smoked marijuana?
It's working out so well though
we're all so happy
about it
that's so funny
I'm partying man
I'm so
I'm like
I'm like post
I'm post weed
you are?
what do you mean?
I was like
I was super into weed
like
when I was
10 years younger
than you
but now I don't know it's
i don't know smoking both i mean i kind of i will like i like those five milligram camino gummies
yeah those are nice that's like a nice high but the but like i don't like smoking weed
esther's like asleep in museum
well she would be
asleep in a museum
if she was high or not
but
Esther like
will be like
walking sleeping
she takes so much
she'll be like
that is a little bit
of an exaggeration
not really
George and Carlos
were there
is that how you
would describe it
yes
you gotta try
Esther you gotta try
ketamine
why
it's great
it's awesome
yeah why what does it do it's like a really pleasant dissociative experience like you
dissociate just enough it's relaxing she's been judging me because i got an ulcer from doing too
much i was never judging you for it was i was in love with it i thought it was so much fun
you know you know about you know about cocaine and what people call
doing cocaine and ketamine?
What is it?
Uh,
people in like the party gay community,
they call it Calvin Klein.
Why?
I don't know.
Cause CK,
Calvin Klein.
I'd call it,
pull that dick out.
I call it,
I call it Louis CK.
Yeah.
That's so funny.
And we all got to.
Yeah,
we all got,
I have been saying,
I was setting myself up to do that. But he didn't say it fast enough everybody else i didn't say it
you got i've been saying this you got i've been saying this for months i was clearly
that happened my friend that happened my friend the other day where i like said something to her
and then um and then later i was like i said it again and she was like i love that and i was like
you should use it and she's like i made it up and she was like i love that and i was like you should
use it and she's like i made it up and i was like oh no do you ever have those with your friends
we're like i don't care who made everything up i don't care yeah please lord take it lord take it
yeah it's just weird in comedy because we're all a little bit of hacks and then everyone
if you if you accuse someone of stealing your joke you gotta really know they stole
because that can be really embarrassing one time i was able to google image a
a joke of my own like there was like a meme i was like oh it's so embarrassing you know what
happened one time uh recently was i i told i told a joke i told it twice and the first time i told
it it was another comic was like oh oh, I actually just wrote it.
I wrote a joke just like that.
And I always have just written it.
You're like, oh, that's weird.
And just right.
I was on stage.
But then it was like, no, it was like not.
I don't know if I have a joke that's similar to somebody else's.
I would mention it.
I just do it faster.
But I just get it.
Yeah.
If I have like the same joke as somebody else, I would say something.
Wow, how would you say that?
What would you say, though?
That does not happen a lot.
Have you ever had that happen?
Have you?
Oh, no.
This is where Annie tells me I stole her whole act.
That's not my act.
I've tried to get her to steal my act i've begged you to take jokes um oh i was i was
gonna say i i did a joke at a at a show where i mean this is it was honestly like kind of a hack
joke i think because it was right after the right after britney was free and i was like oh how it
would be really funny if she just immediately shot a guy you know and like i
great joke um but i did that at some joke some show at like union hall and uh there was like a
couple in the front that like the the joke got a laugh from the crowd but there was a couple in the
front and one of them was like oh my god we were just talking about that and i was like
like like the couple was saying that they were just making that joke to each other that day and
then i was like i was like i'm not doing that again you know what that's a topical joke and
i feel like that happens like that's not that big and that's like i think that that's why it's like
best to like stay away from topical stuff because it's too easy to run into.
It's also like there's no longevity in it.
It's fun.
This is my one strength as a comic.
I'm going to flex it.
I'm so obsessed with myself that I would never consider topical jokes like I'm it's all about.
Oh, I thought you're going to say jokes.
I would never.
Wait, do you guys watch you for you?
Yeah, I do.
It's a lot of stuff happening this season.
Oh, this last episode was good.
I didn't see the recent one.
Oh, you're going to like it.
But yeah, I mean, first episode out the gate when Fez beats up.
He's the best character.
Frickin' Nate Jacobs.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, that's something I tweeted in 2019.
It's from knowyourmeme.com.
Well, yeah.
Now, Euphoria High School
has become a meme,
but I tweeted...
Whoa.
I made the joke
about Euphoria High School
years ago.
Yeah.
But this happens.
This has happened a few times.
It says,
Hey, what's up, guys?
I'm the new kid here
at Euphoria High School.
Why are all the lights purple?
Why don't any of the kids
here do homework? You know, this is a 2019 joke. Euphoria High School. Why are all the lights purple? Why don't any of the kids here do homework?
You know, this was a 2019 joke.
This was first season.
Why is everyone dressed like Esther Povitsky?
And now everybody's making Euphoria High School jokes on there.
Yeah.
I just got scared that I said it like Christina's last name.
No, but those are similar.
Pazitsky is her.
Justin Martindale brought me up on stage the other night,
and he said that I was the lunch lady on Euphoria.
And I was like, he nailed it.
He cast me so well.
He is good.
Oh, my God.
So well cast.
I was.
Oh, I did.
I did audition like several times for the new season.
You did?
Obviously, I did not get it.
If I was your agent.
No, if I was your agent, I would be doing the exact same thing.
Gotta get him on the show.
Like I was.
I was really.
I thought.
I was like, maybe.
Let's just say you'd be in nail polish.
Yeah.
Let's just say you'd be in nail polish.
They'd be painting my goddamn nails.
But I will say there was like that one...
The first episode,
the first episode of the new season,
it's that scene where like Maddie's banging
on the bathroom door, right?
Yeah.
And she meets that guy, right?
She meets a guy who's like a big black guy on the show.
And he's played by Young Meech, I believe.
But I auditioned for that.
And I remember once I actually watched the show and saw...
I thought that I really nailed the audition.
And then I watched the show and it's like a big black guy.
It's the greatest thing that could happen.
And I was like, why would you?
It was mean for you to make me audition for that.
No, but here's the thing.
When you when I was like.
When I was someone that's so different.
It was always going to be that guy.
Then you don't you can the blames off you.
They just wanted a different type.
They weren't sure.
Yeah.
But yeah, I've had that too where it's like. Like, why did you they just wanted a different type they weren't sure yeah but i yeah
i've had that too where it's like like why'd you why'd i even i can't there's certain shows i like
i have to wait a full season before i can watch them because i'm like i'm still salty i didn't
get the part i know that feeling like yeah how's doll face doll face is coming out or it's out by
now i'm so i'm really excited yeah You look cute and all the things they make,
they kind of like upped your regular game. I feel like,
do you feel that way too?
I'm struggling right now with, I was,
I'm just going to be completely honest.
I was heavier when we filmed for health reasons and I'm now less heavy. And so it's every time i see the promo all i think about
is like that i look should you just like ask for them to do reshoots yes now yeah we only just
reshoot my part you'll have power in hollywood when you can do that when you're like listen
blur the background we'll cgi me back in we'll green screen it i just feel like now i've i've
done my worst fear i've manifested my worst fear. I've manifested my worst fear,
which is drawing attention to my weight fluctuations on camera.
This is my gift to the world.
If you guys want to have fun with all the ups and downs of my weight.
Well, that's the problem.
If you're podcasting, you're putting it all out there all the time.
You can't be an elusive podcaster. That was an interesting time for you to spread your legs like that.
Oh, yeah.
You're kind of just putting it all out there,
you know?
Well,
have you ever watched Schultz's,
Andrew Schultz's podcast?
It's at Crouch Level.
Oh no.
It's so funny.
Wait,
what?
His like,
the cameras are like at his dick.
He's like this.
It's so crazy.
I'm like,
oh my God,
like you have to really squish it down.
He does it like that.
It's always like,
his penis is like touching the camera.
He's like this. Oh yeah. I'm like, I guess I like it like that. It's always like his penis is like touching the camera. He's like this.
Oh, yeah.
I'm like, I guess I like it down here.
I do feel powerful.
Does he have two podcasts?
He has Flagrant 2, which I don't know why it's called 2.
Is there two Flagrants?
Because the other guy.
With Akash?
Yes.
Singh?
Then he has one with Charlemagne.
Andrew is such a sweet guy.
I think I met him at Montreal years ago.
It's funny because I feel like his online thing now is he's a tough guy.
He's controversial, but I just think of him as such a sweet guy.
Yeah, he is really nice.
Oh, Charlemagne.
You were working on the codes. Yeah, and I did Breakfast Club when I went to go do it. It wasagne, did you, you were working with, on the Codes.
Yeah.
And I did Breakfast Club when I went to go do, it was so fun.
Oh, you did?
Yeah.
I watched that.
It was really good.
Oh, wait, you were on the Breakfast Club like recently?
Yeah.
I got to watch this.
I want to go again.
I want to go again.
That was so cool because I recently discovered Kanye West, this new artist.
And some of his greatest interviews were on Breakfast Club,
as I am now teaching you about.
Soulja Boy has the best ones.
Oh, really?
It's the number one.
Soulja Boy has the best Breakfast Club videos.
And Tekashi69.
Okay.
Yeah.
Oh, Kalilah looks like him.
Yeah, mine was not controversial or anything.
I hope to go on and up my...
No, I watched yours.
I was watching Kanye over and over, No I watched yours I was like watching Kanye
Over and over and then I saw you
And it was the day I came out with a cowboy hat
I had a black cowboy hat and sunglasses
The Vogue cover
Came out with Beyonce
In a black cowboy hat and I was like
I mean am I not a trendsetter
Look at that
But it was someone said I looked like
I was on Rock of Love.
Or not Rock of Love.
What was the one?
Yeah, Rock of Love.
As the male lead.
That's what I saw on my screen.
As the slashes making me laugh.
I think my favorite Breakfast Club moment is when Hillary Clinton said she has a hot sauce in her bag.
Wait, what?
That was awesome.
Everyone embarrassed.
I was like, I was happy to be like a white person that didn't.
That was an awesome moment when she said,
yeah, I keep hot sauce in my bag.
In my bag.
I, you know.
Did you see the ad for, there's a master class.
It's like Hillary Clinton's like,
it's like all black and white and it's Hillary Clinton.
Or maybe it's like just dark tones.
And she's like,
she's like,
here's the speech I was going to read.
And she's like about to cry.
Oh boy.
And then she goes,
I'll read the full speech on masterclass.com.
Oh yeah.
I'm like,
this is like,
did you get hacked Mitch?
Did you just get hacked?
Because this is crazy.
I'm signing up for that.
What's the class?
How to be a fucking loser?
It's so embarrassing to still be crying about it
she's still crying
it's crazy
the most embarrassing thing was the glass ceiling
that they had a glass ceiling on the thing that was dark
brutal when they like they were ready
to just like I just want to say that
I really want a female president
well who's it gonna be it shouldn't
be her
it shouldn't be her.
It shouldn't be her.
I'm going to go out and let them say this.
I do not pay attention to politics at all.
I don't.
I just will not.
I'm done.
I was a big, big Bernie guy.
Yeah, that's right.
I have a beautiful Bernie poster in my office.
Love him.
Your office?
Are you a fucking idiot for saying that in front of me?
You're off. You fucking stupid idiot. you know the room i'm talking your office your trash where you sleep on the couch her office is a
garbage den what the fuck are you talking about you stupid it is true that when i first got my
new couch in my office that i was so excited about it i slept on it for like three months that's dave was like
what's going on i yeah i mean there's something about sleeping on your own couch falling asleep
on your own couch i love it i think it's hormone there's i i have like a mythical
feeling around that like i just think that's the coolest thing is someone who falls asleep
on their couch i have like a romantic view of it really i've no i will beg dave i'll be like dave let's do sleepover in the living room tonight and he's
like no i can't move my mask oh it's so sad we gotta get him a rolly one what's your deal what's
like the whole thing with you and sleepovers i i i've only seen snippets of this but i i saw like
one clip where you're like guys i keep saying we need to do a
sleepover episode i grew up like having sleepovers all the time and i just love them so much that's
what she called sleeping on a parent's floor i also had it like well there's i feel like a lot
of whatever just i love sleepovers yeah yeah they're nice well rick glassman thinks you stole
it from him i i know oh what's what's rick glassman's deal
with sleepover he did i can't remember what it was he did like a sleepover episode of his podcast
and then i was like oh we were gonna do that too he accused you of stealing it when you named your
your no if he did that that's mentally ill i think he did it but we'll have to have him on to find out.
Controversy.
Rick Glassman, you're going down.
Brandon, how are you feeling right now?
Do you feel like you've been violated, attacked?
I love it.
This was fun.
I love it. Do you feel safe and comfortable?
Or do you feel like the two women are?
Oh, yeah.
I feel very at.
I'll do Rogan hours.
Oh my God.
Isn't it?
Have you ever done it?
You've done Rogan?
I've not received the Rogan bump yet.
It is...
What if it was a bump?
What if every time you went,
he gave you a bump or something?
People who are angry online,
they're just like showing off
how fucked up their own life is.
Yeah.
It's like not about online.
Are you talking about my angry rant?
It is embarrassing
to post true anger, but I did think it
came out funny, so I did post it anyway.
Well, yesterday I went through something that
really rocked my world.
Oh, please do tell.
We'll talk about it another time,
but I really wanted to
get angry online.
Wait, can I ask a question?
Was it directed at you?
Something that happened to me in a business thing
that someone said to me, and I was like, this is it.
I've never done this, but I'm going to tell the world.
And I just was like, you know what?
I actually was texting with Carlos about it.
He was like, don't like an app that's past
its prime twitter to like also don't listen to carlos that's not bad advice don't go crazy on
twitter what is it we're trying to get a hit here all right do you want us to have a good show or
not we need a twitter controversy should we did you have you shown feet on the program no you're not going oh i forgot about
our um oh yeah what we have hits we have hits everything about us tell us we okay so we got
in the little rivalry over the feet pixelation about where who started it oh it wasn't really
us which now it's other people have run away with it that it's like, that it's like not even, I don't even want it.
It's gross.
It's gross.
At this point,
I'm just literally doing it cause I'll do it till I die.
Cause I promised I would.
Yeah.
But we both were pixelating our feet.
Yeah.
And then people,
it wasn't us coming after each other,
but we both were a little cocky about maybe we were the ones.
But then,
but yeah,
like there were people in your comments saying,
Oh,
Brandon did that.
And then I think it just shows that we were
the ogs we really weren't we started it but yeah eventually then everybody is doing it now
to where that's and that is like the thing with the internet is that like if you start something
and then everybody ends up doing it then you just seem even if you're the one that created
yeah you seem like that a dinosaur you created that you seem as
unoriginal as everybody else
how do you combat that?
that's why I guess just like
yeah
exactly I mean that's why
that's kind of why I don't use it
it's like a little bit
what's going on right now?
I mean it's just
I'm just putting the i'm just putting the the video
to to to work but my my wiki feet comments are so funny because people are so mad at me that i
pixelate my feet they're like how dare you she's making a mockery of the community i'm like but
why are you entitled to my feet i didn't know you were jerking off to them so i had them out
if i know you're jerking off them i don't want to put them out until I'm ready for someone to jerk off to them.
And you haven't put them out?
I've never put them out.
Oh, to this day.
I was thinking I would do it for, I always say I'll do it for a million dollars and quarters.
If someone wants to buy the quarters.
I'm holding out for the big pay.
So annoying.
We're going to have to do that at some point.
Did we get the count quarters?
I met him. He came to the comedy store
last week. Oh, that's great.
And I was thinking about, no, I was literally
thinking about, Brad Williams was there and he was like,
take your shoes off and sneak behind him.
And we'll take a picture. And I was like, it's funny, but I
also just want to listen to everything he's saying. He was being so
funny. What was he doing at the
comedy store? He was like, we used to get down
here. I was like, oh my God, he's so crazy.
Was he there to see someone? He was there because he'd watched the comedy store documentary so many times and I was in it and he wasn get down here. I was like, oh my God, he's so crazy. Was he there to see someone?
He was there because he'd watched the Comedy Store documentary so many times.
And I was in it and he wasn't recognizing me.
I was getting so pissed.
I was like, hey, you saw the documentary.
He kept bringing it up.
I was like, did you like the fourth episode?
It was a cute one.
And he was like, I remember you. I'm like, not enough.
I need more.
And then he was hanging out and he was being so like, he was just being the ultimate.
Because he's like so eccentric and like kind of crazy.
But he was so funny and so like animated and loud there was just like a group of people
were all just like staring at him people were just like filming him like these guys just had like
he was fine with it i was like why are you fine with this fine with that i couldn't believe it
i was like i would never i didn't want to take my shoes off behind him by the way carlos your hair
was a hit i know everyone loved it you do look it's like it is fun it gives you like clown vibes like
like brandon said oh wow oh yeah no it's shocking it's like amazing everyone loves it though you do
look like you look like an nft oh my god all right we're making one nft i will draw i will
draw a shot of this i will draw today i'm gonna get back into my Twitter so I can push NFTs.
I asked you on Twitter to retweet it.
Guys, hey, any NFT
Twitter, please.
Alright,
you guys have seen enough.
This is disappointing. This is chintzy.
Come to his show. He needs it, guys.
Come support his act.
Next time he comes back, he needs to have
$400. Also, yeah, have $400 also yeah but still
yeah but still is my podcast
can you try this on I think we're gonna do
videos
check out Brandon's podcast go see
him live come see me and Annie live
this show is over it's been
over for a while yeah but
you're still here watching
you have a problem just
kidding we love you you guys we love you 200k subscribers please Just kidding. We love you. You guys were trying to get to 200K subscribers.
Please hit the subscribe button if you haven't yet.
We're really late on our due date for hitting 200K.
These babies are overdue.
We're at like 118K.
That's nice.
I think it's 119.