Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Cheerleading & Rear Eating

Episode Date: October 19, 2021

Thank you to our Sponsors:   BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at https://betterhelp.com/trashtuesday Magic Spoon - Go to https://magicspoon.com/tuesday and use the code TUESDAY to save five dollars   Manscaped - Get 20% off + free shipping with code TRASH at https://www.manscaped.com Blue Chew - Go to https://bluechew.com and try BlueChew FREE with promo code TUESDAY at checkout--just pay $5 shipping Trash Tuesday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday Subscribe to our YouTube: https://bit.ly/HitOurButtons Official Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/trashtuesdayclips Listen to our other Podcasts: TigerBelly - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/tigerbelly/id1041201977 Meanspiration - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/meanspiration-with-annie-lederman/id1475056491 Esther Club - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/esther-club-with-esther-povitsky/id1494518220 Follow Us: Khalyla Kuhn - https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk Annie Lederman - https://www.instagram.com/annielederman Esther Povitsky - https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster Produced by: George Kimmel & Bryce Hallock - 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: George Kimmel & Pete Forthun Editor: Gabby Galon --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/trashtuesday/message

After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one. Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel.

George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls. And the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at $15 a month. And all plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. That is such a steal. To get this new customer

offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just $15 a month, go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. That's mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month at mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three-month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes. On unlimited plan, additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See Mint mobile for details you guys if you haven't heard about anchor it's the easiest way to make a podcast let me explain

it's free shocking that esther that's what you were about to say right yes it's free uh-huh it's always number one on our list it's free everyone wants to freaking start a podcast this is the easiest way we're about to tell you there's creation tools that allow you to record and edit your podcast right from your phone or computer and and and they will distribute your podcast for you so it it can be heard from spotify apple podcasts and all of the platforms basically also you can make money from your podcast with no minimum listenership the best i mean imagine that that's like the lowest that's low pressure everything you need with anchor everything you need to make a podcast all in one place just download the free anchor app or go to anchor.fm to get started who's got school

spirit not me you guys this episode is insane um i want to let you know that my shows are literally just a few weeks away and they're selling out and I am so excited to come and meet you all in Portland, San Francisco, and finally New York City is on sale. All of those are available at esteronice.com. This is the time to buy them if you're coming. It's just a few weeks away and they're very close to being sold out. And also sleepoverbyester.com for the new drop of, oh my God, the grape wine. It's called I Spilled My Grandma's Wine Sweatsuit. I've been living in it. I'll be wearing it now,

but George has me in a cheerleader's outfit. No swearing in the first five minutes of the- Bleep it out, George. See you guys. All right, slugguggies come see me live I am coming to a club near you hopefully you can see me next October 22nd through 23rd in San Antonio Texas at the Laugh Out Loud comedy club I will be bringing Josh Potter

with me I'll be at Skank Fest November 5th through 7th in Houston Texas I'll be at the House of Comedy in Plano November 11th through 14th. Irvine Comedy, Irvine Improv December 2nd. I'll be back in Texas at Cap City in Austin

December 9th through 11th. I will be in New Jersey September 16th through 18th at Bananas Comedy Club. And that's then the new year. Just look it up online at Annie Letterman dot com slash shows. I've got a bunch more up there.

Come see me. It's so fun. Esther, how are you? I'm so good. I feel insane. How are you? I just usually when people feel insane, they don't feel so good. No, no, no.

For me, insane is usually good. The only bad thing to be for me is bored. I don't want to ever be bored, but if I'm like crazy, that's good. You know why? Why? Because you're broken. Because I learned this when I went to a facility with Bobby. Healing is in the boredom.

We always label peace and quiet and self-reflection as boredom. Yes. Chaos is in the, you know, I mean, all of the insanity you're feeling is because a lot of things are happening. You probably feel a little untethered and it's fun and it's a little destructive. So I am, are you saying I am bipolar, manic depressive? I would say you're really riding on a mania right now. No, I'm genuinely not even like that. No, no, I'm not. Stop. No, I'm just, you stop right there. Honestly, I enjoy my mania. I have no shame in my mania. No, no, no, no. I'm just excited to tell you because it's on theme. I have something to share about high school.

You know, we're in our cheerleading outfits. Right. I'm really excited to get it off my chest. Welcome, by the way, to the cheerleader episode of Trash Tuesday. Rah, rah. Shish kumbah. I don't know. Did you – were you – you were not a cheerleader.

Look at my shoulders and ask me that question again. What is that? The whiz of my back. Look at your hot body and ask you, are you a cheerleader? This is a rig, Esther. This is made for the pool. When you have a wide back and you look the way I do, I should be in the sport in the water is what I'm saying.

The thing that I ever, before deciding if I can do something, look at my body and say like, should I or shouldn't I? Fuck no. I'm a five foot tall girl who tried to be a rockette for years. Wait, but that's a perfect height to be a rockette, right? No, rockettes you literally have to be like five, nine or you can't apply. Wait, but it's so rare to have super tall like gymnasts right rockettes are dancers but don't they have usually some background in like they can i always just assume like dancers have a background in like some gymnastics and doesn't gymnastics like sort of stunt your growth look if you want to get technical okay rockettes must be between 5'6 and 5'10.

I had literally zero chance, and I was like, let me just see. Why don't you get your bones stretched in China? Is that real? Because when I was little, my dad was like, you could go in a stretching machine. And I was like, really? And he's like, I made it up. I saw this thing on Instagram where this guy gained like five inches. He was 5'3 and now he's 5'8. He's about my height now.

Limb lengthening. This can't be safe it can't be why do you always know like the unsafe ways to improve the asians you know they tell me yes they feed me this information my asian mafia does and the jews are like we're just gonna stay as we are really we know what we are there's not really much we can do to fix okay can I tell you this this this crazy thing that happened my I told you how recently I reconnected with my one of my best guy friends from high school is that the one who professes love for you yeah okay and when I hung out with him like a couple weeks ago in my hometown, he was like, by the way, I have this video that you made senior year for like a project. And I was like, oh my God, I've actually been looking for that video.

He had like all the raw footage from this like senior project I made. It's my high school boyfriend interviewing me, asking me questions about my high school experience. Yeah. And I'm so weird and goofy and like I talk like a baby like but I look exactly how I do now like it's so weird to watch you look exactly like you literally look exactly the same and there's like then there you cut to me like walking around my high school so it was so cool like I'm like had this time capsule I'm

watching it this weekend when I was inxico and all of a sudden it cuts to three seconds of me having graphic sex with my high school boyfriend stop he used the same tape literally as though it's a nightmare or a movie that i'm in where the worst case scenario happens it's three seconds of me crawling fucking butt ass naked up my boyfriend in high school's body and starting to make out with him we're we're mid graphic sex you are the sex tape kind of gal I only in high school yes I literally cut it off after high school because I told Dave what happened and he was like, what? We never – I was like, Dave, you cannot film that stuff. But I just couldn't fucking believe it.

So basically I'm guessing like this was my tape. Can I watch? I will show it to you. Okay. I have it digitized. That's how I got to see it. And then I told my friend, I was like, just so you know, and he said he had no idea. He'd never watched tape is he are you sure about that I doesn't that

seem like a lie it does seem like a lie and he was like I won't watch it I was like I don't care I was like you already have it I was so freaked out when I saw it and then I came to terms I was like my friend Ben already has his tape he's allowed to look at it like but no one else can see it I am also I think it's might be like illegal child porn yes i just couldn't believe what i saw and honestly it was i at first i was like oh my god holy shit and then later as like it was sitting with me i feel traumatized by it like to see my teen self like fucking some dude and like i look my body looks so good. How traumatized were you really? Oh my God, my body looked so, Kalilah, my ass and my perky fucking tits and I was skinny as fuck.

I looked so good. Beauty is wasted on the youth. I look so good and I'm like, I'm just fucking this guy. Like it was, it's traumatizing. Have you ever seen yourself having sex with an ex yes you're like yes i jerk off to it i do depends which ex now usually like here's what i'll say about that esther i think that there

is something traumatizing because you're not in a place of like feeling sure about yourself at that age at all and the way you describe it like're crawling. Imagine all the angst and insecurity we felt at that time, even around the idea of sex and boys liking us back and just all of it. Right. So that probably throws you back there. Yes. And it looks like I'm like this like performative, like sexual being, but I'm like I'm an actual legal child. I need you to sign a consent before I watch this because I feel like I'd be watching kiddie porn. I actually want nothing more than for you to watch it and then to get your opinion on it because it's so, to me, so graphic.

Are you going to delete it? Tell me the truth. No, I'm not going to delete it. That's the truth. Okay. Because I have it on one big file with all this other like high school gold that's going to be used for something. I don't know what, but.

Okay. with all this other like high school gold that's going to be used for something i don't know what but okay why don't you split it into two separate digitized um things so you don't have to watch one with the other in the event that you want to watch the high school stuff and not the crawling on someone's body stuff i feel like once you've seen it you've seen it and like you can handle it like i don't need to but one thing is i told Dave and I was like Dave do you want to see it and at first he was like I don't see why not and then he was like actually no yeah I'm like would you well here's what I'll say about Bobby um he did find some pictures of me in Mexico as a 17 year old um now I was actually 18 already at this time but I was at Papa's and beer

and I had my top off at a bar and I had some random boobs sucking on my tits because that's where the tequila or the salt was. They put the salt rim around my tits. Some dude was about to take a shot, and he was genuinely, like, sad. What do you explain? I don't know. You'd have to ask him, but he was just like, I don't know what it is he's like i wish i'd never seen that like you're like you were you were a child that dude you know what i mean yeah like it just made him sad he was like i think that this would make dave really like depressed yeah but but i still want to show it to him badly because i look so good

are you gonna trick him into watching it? No, I'm not evil. That's like sickening. What you just suggested is very ill and I'm not that level. But part of me wants him to see how hot I was. But also that's crazy. Because you're hot now. Yeah, to him for sure.

I actually think I'd be willing to bet you're hotter now than you've ever been. I agree. Especially because I do actually believe hotness comes from your essence. And I think my essence is super hot right now. I feel I've never felt hotter in my life. I agree. You are so fucking hot. The lights dim. The music plays. Show me that tape, Esther. No, your essence is as hot as it's ever been. No, yours. But I do have – okay, we didn't have the fancy gadgets in Blair High School.

So all we had – we couldn't – we didn't have the fancy cell phones. We couldn't record ourselves having sex. This was on a video camera just to clarify. We didn't have like money for that. Fair enough. Didn't have a computer. didn't have that stuff. But my ex-boyfriend Sergio did have a Polaroid camera. And he did take, I mean, the craziest nudes of me.

I was just so down at that age. I don't know how. I was like, yeah, take a close-up shot of my pussy lips. Oh my God. Just up close. Just get into that fucking cervix like i was just insane apparently like i would never have allow anyone to do that unless for like medical purposes now yeah no i'm all about the silhouette now i'm like no take it from afar i agree you're on six filters it is about the the silhouette. Yeah. Yeah, no, that is – it's weird when you're actually a kid. You're a kid.

You are able to do all these sexual things and it's like they're not – you're not all there, bro. I'm not. I mean I would have sex in like a dugout in a baseball field. You know, like the craziest places that I would resort to to just get it in because i was just a horny teenager it's kind of embarrassing and it wasn't for the thrill of being like exhibitionist it was because i had nowhere else to fuck it's embarrassing and i'm glad we're sharing it with the 200 000 people who watch this video next tuesday so my final take on this whole thing and maybe annie will have a different take

on it when she gets here, is that it's nice. The time capsule thing I'm really happy for. Same. And you know what I really like is the fact that you felt good watching an older version of yourself. Because when I watched a video of myself in high school, I think I cried for three days. Why? I could not recognize who she was. All I saw was somebody with a very thick accent trying to sound like a valley girl, trying to like mask an accent. And everything came flooding back and I wanted to die watching it. Because you were so humiliated. Humiliated.

Oh my goodness. Cheers. This is like from a different time. You look like one that died in 1920. What do I look like? Well, I'm just only seeing your eye makeup. So there are eras of cheerleading, Annie? Wait, I love that.

We're from different eras of cheerleading? I love that you did the classic thing today of being late, but with Starbucks in your hand. Starbucks became, I will tell you this, Starbucks came way before the late, the late months. Starbucks was very early this morning. It has kind of a Bulls vibe to it,

so that's why I really like it. Oh, like, what were those? The Lovables. Is that what they were? I think she meant like the Chicago Bulls, right?

Yeah, Chicago Bulls. No, the Lovables were the Chicago Bulls dance. Like LA, like the Laker girls? Oh, I don't know that. I'm not gonna know that.

I used to babysit for a Lovable and she was so gorgeous. Wait, LA, like the Laker girls? Oh, I don't know that. I'm not going to know that. I used to babysit for a lovable and she was so gorgeous. Wait, you babysat a lovable? No, I was her babysitter for her babies. Oh, okay. Got it. Show us these. Now, I saw these in your pictures

from Adam Devine's wedding. Yes. Did you wear them with a dress? I did. I wore them with a skirt. Okay, got it. Esther, I know that you wanted desperately to be a Rockette.

Could you show us an audition right now? Well, you teach us to – you have cute little strong legs. Wait, really? Yeah. Explain. Tell me more. They look like maybe you ran once, but we know you didn't. Like maybe you went on a bike or –

It's from – it's honestly from ballet from high school. It's still – Do you have fucked up toes from like – No. Did you ever do point? I did do point but my toes didn't get fucked up from it. Well this is actually cheer. This is palms because I was on the palm squad. Love the unshaved armpits. Mine too.

I totally shaved yesterday. Wait, do you guys have five o'clock shadow every time you shave? Yes. I can't do a kick in this. Well we'll blur it out. Show us your labe. Pop a labe. Stop! Don't say that.

Ow! Did you snag a labe? I forgot that I have... I forgot I've been having restless leg syndrome. Sit down. Esther, you are my restless leg syndrome. No, I literally didn't sleep at all last night. I need to actually.

Because your legs were moving? Of course you would have restless legs. No, do you know what I'm talking about? Where like you get these tingles all over your lower back. And you feel the urge to like run and move. What do I have? Restless leg syndrome. How do I make it go away?

I couldn't sleep. More weed. My sister has really bad restless leg syndrome because she has a bad back and she injured it really young. So I don't know. She hasn't found a solution. But when she does, I'll let you know. I just want to be clear.

I believe in restless leg syndrome. I do not believe in Esther's restless leg syndrome. No, I had it. Too convenient for someone like you. I had it once like five years ago and then it went away really easily. But it's back and it sucks. Do you think it's like your body wants to move? Yes, that's my theory.

No. I think maybe you don't move enough and your body's like, it's time. That's why your legs are good. I was hoping it's because I was on a plane yesterday and maybe that triggered it. Tell us about your trip. I usually get restless leg after a big heavy night out of

drinking and that my knees and legs feel weird at when I'm hungover. It's just Jaeger in your ankles? Uh-huh. Just hungover. It's just Jaeger in your ankles. Just gout, but instead of just Jaeger around my joints. Jaeger in your joints. There's so much butt cheek hanging. I wish you guys could see. I wore a little short. This is way too small.

Give us a breakdown, please. God, your fucking thighs are fucking epic. Oh my God. Jesus Christ. No. Well, I wanted to a pantyhose i was trying to get like a dallas cowboys slash hooters kind of vibe with legs with the you know i'm talking about yeah and then i put the shorts on underneath and um i ordered this online it's just so short and what

does it say in the front because your hair is covering it says daddy oh that's sick that's so sick it's just like imagine i wasn't wearing the shorts i mean my ass hair would be in the face tell us about mexico okay so i went to mexico for adam divine's wedding i'm so excited to go to a where in mexico cabo cabo at a really nice resort it was so beautiful i've never i've never gone on a real vacation you've been to Mexico, though. I have been. In high school, I went once. I mean, no, I went in college twice with my parents.

So it was very much like the third wheel vibe. But it was so fun. Eric Griffin was there. Adam Ray was there. Adam Devine was there. Adam Devine was there. It was just really fun. I't know oh oh my god adam and blake a few people came up to me and and adam rain everyone was so complimentary of trash tuesday

come on boys let's do a workaholics episode that's been off the air for five years but it's still good what if i was like i love is my favorite show no i would love to have them on this though i i almost was like wow if you love it so much but i was like i'll love is my favorite show. No, I would love to have them on this though. I almost was like, wow, if you love it so much, but I was like, I'll play it cool. But no, they were so, everyone at the wedding was, not everyone, but all the comedy people were like made up. In the middle of the, he was like, and grab her hand. First, I do want to say before they kiss, I want to say I love Trash Tuesdays. Help me.

Sometimes your friends cannot hear you complain more. Kalilah, you've had to set some boundaries with me before. You guys, if you are a fan of this show, you know that myself, Annie, and Esther, we have a long list of problems. And there is no shame in upping your mental wellness game and we at this show do it with better help check out betterhelp.com slash trash tuesday so a lot of things interfere with my happiness i know that i go through especially right now in the fall i have um

seasonal um affective disorder affective disorder i. I have the SADS. And it really ramps up in November, right around my birthday. And I think if you... Annie has her own set of issues as well. And that's what interferes with ours. But BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. Connect in a safe and private online environment. It's so convenient you can start communicating in under 48 hours. It's not a crisis line. It's not self-help. It is professional counseling done securely online. You can send a message to your counselor anytime and you'll get timely and thoughtful responses. Plus you can schedule weekly video or phone sessions because sometimes I don't want to see anybody. And those phone sessions really come

in handy. Let traffic be the only thing that's blocking you. Anything you share is confidential. It's convenient, professional, affordable. You guys, we want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you'll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday. Join over 1 million people who have taken charge of their mental health. Again, that's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Trash Tuesday. We're all trying to eat better. Listen, I'm getting high. I'm smoking weed. I don't know what to eat, okay? I'm running around my house. I'm getting Top Ramen. I'm eating Funyuns. I'm eating things that are not good for you. I have a solution to your munchies. Why not, instead of grabbing that cereal with a chock full of sugar,

that you just reach for that magic box of magic spoon? I'm so down. I can't even, like, when I put things away in my cabinet, I don't think of them when I'm high. I'm going to put my magic spoon out on the counter. You know what my mom does for me? She makes Rice Krispie Treats using magic spoon. And it's just, I get to eat it without the guilt and all the sugars.

Growing up, cereal was one of the best parts of being a kid. Wouldn't you agree? Yeah, 100%. But why did we have to give it up? It just was, it was bad for us. We didn't, we couldn't do it anymore. And it's like, what are we going to eat? We're all trying to eat better, but healthy breakfast doesn't have to give it up? It just was, it was bad for us. We didn't, we couldn't do it anymore. And it's like, what are we going to eat? We're all trying to eat better, but healthy breakfast doesn't have to be boring.

Magic Spoon has the amazing flavors you love, but without all the bad stuff. And it's amazing as a midnight snack. It has zero grams of sugar, 13 to 14 grams of protein, and only four net grams of carbs in each serving. Only 140 calories a serving. It's keto friendly, gluten free, grain free, soy free and low carb. What I love about is that you can actually build your own box depending on which flavors you love. And they have flavors from cocoa to fruity, frosted for a very simple guy like me. I love

the frosted peanut butter, blueberry, cinnamon, cookies and cream and maple waffle. We also just want you guys to know that Magic Spoon has brought back the two most popular flavors, cookies and cream and maple waffle. And they are now here to stay. also just want you guys to know that magic spoon has brought back the two most popular flavors cookies and cream and maple waffle and they are now here to stay so you guys can go to magic spoon dot com slash tuesday to grab a custom bundle of cereal and try it today and be sure to use our promo code tuesday at checkout to save five dollars off your order and magic spoon is so confident in their product it's backed with a 100% happiness guarantee. So if you don't like it for any reason, they'll refund your money.

No questions asked. Remember, get your next delicious bowl of guilt-free cereal at magicspoon.com slash Tuesday and use the code Tuesday to save $5 off. We thank Magic Spoon for sponsoring this episode and we love them so much. for sponsoring this episode and we love them so much. Did they have like a cool, what do you call the person that marries you? Priest? Oh no, it was Adam Ray officiated it. Oh, I know. And he did great. He was funny.

I was wondering if you guys would ever be interested in officiating a wedding and do you think you'd be good at it? Are you going to make us compete to officiate your wedding? I would love to. Of course I would be good at it. I would be really good at it too in ways you wouldn't even expect like how Esther I can't even explain it

like you wouldn't expect her to be good and then she would do it you would expect her to not show up and then she'd be there opening with complaining about

your restless leg syndrome I would put I would just work so tirelessly on it because I know how good they have to be for it you know

it needs to be it really needs to be good I do blame the the it you know and it needs to be you need it really needs to be good I do blame the um the person who marries the people if they get a divorce how why well it's just your fault you're supposed to this is your ceiling your bonding yeah situation if you didn't do it you could read some of your poetry do you have blonde hair now I don't that's just an extension oh it's beautiful thank you I thought you were doing Esther's hair although I did used to have ashy highlights but I feel like that phase is so i want you to do chunky highlights because i did but high school i was all about the chunky i just don't think i could pull it off now your eye

makeup looks great thank you annie i i want to just go back i will say that it did feel like i was like a workaholics like i was in like the wedding did they seat you guys together all uh what do you mean the comics no no i was shocked i wasn't at eric griffin's table eric griffin was at the table with rebel wilson and i was i was with blake and some of blake's friends and obviously dave because dave is i don't i only know those guys through dave um because dave wrote on the first two seasons i think and they're they're all, like I love the brotherhood of that they have. It's so cute. It's inspiring to me

that we need to have that for us. Which one of them are we? You're Adam because you're like the wild, crazy one. But you're short. Don't you fucking say Eric's character. No, you're not Montez. Montez.

You're Crystalia. You're Crystalia's character. No, but do you know what's so funny is when we got there, Dave saw Eric Griffith and he's not Montez Montez you're Crystalia you're Crystalia's character no but do you know what's so funny is when we got there Dave saw Eric Griffith he's like Montez and I'm like

that's so that's what you know him as yeah like I see him every night I do think I'm Durs okay on Durs yeah

George is nodding his head nodding because I feel like I'm like kind of the nerdiest of the bunch and Durs I feel like i'm like kind of the nerdiest of the bunch and derz i feel like is like gets it done it's so weird what you think you are i'm so surprised do you think i'm a jock

annie thinks i'm a jock so i think she's a jock i don't think you are in the world or actually you're montez you're definitely montez I'm just kidding you're not Montez you're probably Jillian Bell's character what was Eric's character just like the goofy guy in the office he's just Eric Griffin

that's definitely not me he's himself you mean yeah no you have to be Blake then why are you looking at me like that I'm drinking you in drinking you in she's always in Hawaii

coming back glowing do I look pregnant no you look great. You didn't look pregnant last time. You looked like you had gotten fillers or something or Botox. Oh, from Hawaii. From Hawaii, you mean? Yes.

So the tan will do. But my tan has faded. So the fillers, the Botox look is gone. I hold this, by the way, because my hands sweat a lot. So if you ever see that and it annoys you, trust me, this is a coping mechanism. We've been through this. Yeah, I know. I just need to remind people. But I want everyone to know that she has a hole all of your like ailments are things that just make you hotter to men because like you have

sweaty hands so it's like easier to give a hand job like it's true you said that you can't grow your vagina hair yeah that is true god is just gifting me all of these but that ass hair really does grow the ass hair is a problem it's throwing out you know what i hate to tell you guys but that's coming that's the growth has stopped there too well i manscaped i do a light manscaping and then i kind of just let's be honest there's nothing light about your manscaping. No, the light, the LED light. I did a medical grade. I manscape, but it's not, it's very sloppy. Guys do have power when they make you feel a little like they could leave you at any point.

Like the fact that I know Todd will be with me until my last breath, I really do very little for him. It is true. They got to keep you kind of thirsty. Yeah. He needs to flirt with someone in front of him. He never, he's so, he's such a good boy. I'm like, you got to do something. Why is that?

I, God, that is a terrible thing about me. What? Is that when I'm shown like total love and devotion, it's, it's almost like I don't know what to do with it because it's not what i'm familiar with like my mom kept me thirsty for her love i'm still thirsty for her you know um like some validation from her so it's like those are the types of relationship i had growing up so it's the same ones that i have with men So my ex was probably the greatest guy you could ever meet. I just could not get there. Yeah. And because I was young and stupid, maybe now. Let's try it. Let's bring him back on. But why are you down? Why does it work with Bobby, but it didn't work with the ex? Because he keeps me so thirsty. He gives me no love and affection.

I'm just always like, can you just touch my hair today i have a question for you guys if you were to ask one of your exes what your ass tastes like what would they say what who are you first of all you're talking about ass hair no no no i saw my ex the other night oh you did so i see him okay so i so I'm with Todd. We're out smoking weed after the show, after my spot. My ex-boyfriend comes to the comedy store and he calls me over, right? So I go to Todd. I go, I'm going to go talk to him. So I walk over to my ex-boyfriend thinking, I don't know what I thought was going to happen.

I just thought it was going to be good. He goes, immediately he goes, hey, do you want to see this thing I made? And I went, I said, no, I don't want to see it. And he kept, he started explaining it to me rather than showing it to me and I couldn't believe it and I was so high and I didn't want to talk to him at all and I started like recoiling in this open mic or who was like rolling a blunt next to us was like he walked away and he goes was that guy a manager and I go no he's a comedian which was perfect also I was like oh my god nobody knows who he is and he like well and I go no and, what was, why was that so crazy?

And I went, he's my ex-boyfriend. And he was like, that's why you were recoiling. I was recoiling the whole time. I was like this. He was speaking at me. I hated every second of it. I kept trying to say things to him. And it felt like, it felt like my words would come out and they weighed too much to like

keep going. So they would fall to the ground. I would just be like, like, I just have nothing. My energy cannot be near him i feel very protective of you when you talk about like even being around him because of how toxic you described it like just even the takes two to have a crazy rage i realize that but like some of like the sexual stuff that you talk to me about makes me want to fucking cry and i think that's what some of like the sexual stuff that you talk to me about makes me want to fucking cry and i think that's what your body probably responds to whoa i mean it could be i mean i think it might be but it's just i don't i can't believe what i feel is not like

anything about him it's more like sadness for who i was that i dated this person that i was with this person for so long that i idolized this person. I loved this person. This is very on trend with what we were talking about before you got here because I fucking watched a tape of mine from high school and intercut not fully taped over was three seconds of graphic sex with my high school boyfriend. Yeah. You are such – you're secretly the biggest slut in this whole crew. It's really – you're the go-go queen. She's – her little bell.

Fuck you. I'm sick of your shit. Bring the you bring the bell with a graphic sex tape is that the first time you've rung the bell on yourself you baby slut but like at first at first just like oh my god my body's hot amazing and then you're like oh i feel sick i was like there to have sex with this gross guy we show the clip like no disrespect to him but like I don't know it's just it made me it made me uncomfortable and I thought about it later and it made me feel sad it's just like you're seeing this version of yourself or something like imagine if you saw yourself having sex with one of these oh it's disgusting why is that it's so bad I just realized that I was in a relationship for two years with someone that did not give a fuck.

Anything I said, anything I wanted, anything I needed was not even. And if he did, it was because it was like to feed him being able to tell me more. But as someone who talks at people, I can also understand that. But you know what's good about you is that you listen and there's pieces of information that I've thrown at you or I'm like how the fuck does she remember that and now I'm like insecure that I'm like what have I said to Annie because she you retain stuff yeah you're not a talker who doesn't also listen like you you do both you are good at getting information out I don't know if you keep it but I don't know if you keep it you've never thrown it back at me I definitely keep it and I don't use it against you and throw it back

at you. No, I've definitely like been in conversations with you where I've gotten off the phone. I don't think she said one word except, oh, really? What else? And I'm like, what is she doing? Is she writing a book? No, that is truly my jam. Like I, I love to just I mean, I feel like you're like me, too. We talk with all the time. It's like, I just I'm a. Like I love to just – I mean I feel like you're like me too. We talk about this all the time. It's like I just am a listener and I love to ask questions. And like you also – there's a reason like we have a podcast. It's like you have a lot to say, you know. You're a machine.

And people are interested. Yeah. I wasn't alone. That was just me discovering that we should do a podcast. Did you learn that skill set to extract info? No, I think that's literally just who I am. Yeah. It's not like a skill to me.

Yeah. So when do your parents do it? My mom's super nosy and like is a big listener. Yeah. Is she a big gossiper? No, she's so genuine. Like she just loves to listen. I truly, it's not a gossip thing for me.

But I love that. I love to just listen and learn about people. To me, that's better than like watching a TV show. I yearn for someone like your mom because my family, the women in my family, couldn't shut the fuck up about other people. Yeah. Like it was just like always gossip central

and it drives me crazy. Like even my mom now, like I wish we had deeper conversations. Like it's so superficial. It's always about who's gained weight. Whether it's a celebrity or someone we know,

who's broken up with who, who's like in financial ruin. Yeah, it's always like the, yeah, like look how bad they're doing. That's fun. It does uplift you a little. It gives you a little boost.

Yeah, I always, I always tell her, it's like, Ma, you know like you're operating on like the lowest frequency, right? Where you're just talking about other people. She's like, oh, I don't care, I was like, Ma, you know, like you're operating on like the lowest frequency, right? When you're just talking about other people.

She's like, oh, I don't care. I feel still because I'm working on my gossiping and I'm working on like just the activity of it when it's like completely separate from everything else. Like it's one thing when you're like hanging out with someone, you're working on something, you do a little gossiping during it or whatever. But when your whole hang is a gossip, like from start to finish, you're just talking shit. Like remember that girl I used to be friends with? That's all. That was how we became friends. And when we ended up not being friends anymore, it was like, of course, this friendship wasn't going to last because it was completely based on like, like just trashing everyone all the time, which was in more comics. We can do it well. We have like good. It can be very fun.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm not saying that I want it out of my life but I've realized like I've been noticing more what I hate is when my friends gossip about someone I've never met where I'm like there's no product we can't like talk through it we can't like I like to gossip with now with like a goal of getting through it yeah and figuring out what is the thing about that person that's like reflecting on you like how do you get out of this what does this mean right so but when my friend will bring up she'll like bring up a girl And figuring out what is the thing about that person that's like reflecting on you. Like how do you get out of this? What does this mean? But when my friend will bring up, she'll like bring up a girl I'm not friends with. And she'll just be telling me about like what happened to that girl one day.

Who cares? This is literally a waste of time. I don't know that person. That couldn't be more true. I cannot stand people who go on and on and on about a Sheila that I've never met. And I'm like, who the fuck is Sheila? Like, why do I care? And then they need you to care with them.

Like, I have a friend who, she'll be like, you're not even going to believe what happened to this girl. Like, she went out one night and this girl said something about her ex. And I'm like, I don't, I don't know this girl. I didn't know she was married. I don't. And then I'll go, oh, I don't want to talk about this. Yeah.

And then it's like very like, well, I'm upset. I'm like, but why are you upset about a thing that has nothing to do? If you have a problem with this person, I'll talk to you about that all night. Did something happen to you with this person that you want to talk through? But what, there's no like. Our longest conversations between the three of us, like my favorite thing was when I told you about this one person and I felt really sort of like like oh like i don't know about this person but this person i feel like she's doing this and that and you guys just backed me up and validated it with your own story because i know and i was

like oh my god i don't feel crazy i love those instances where i'm like am i feeling crazy but i feel like this person is doing this and then you guys give me your own stories about that's what i get into too because i'm genuinely like not that i'm a listener but i'm not really like out for the gossip i actually would rather i would much rather sit and have annie tell me like all about herself like that's so much more interesting oh good thing i got a lot to say about me. You're in the right place. But on the other side of that is like when there's like

if someone is actually like has been mean to you and done something bad to you and then you hear that they did something bad to someone else you know then it's time to be like all right, here's what happened.

Well, Todd always says this. He says he got scammed once really bad. I can't remember what it was. It was someone, like, he got scammed in, like, a really, like, kind of obvious way where someone, like, wanted to borrow money from him. It was just some random thing where he got scammed. And he said, once you get scammed, you just want to find other people that got scammed. It's true.

It just feels so bad. You just want to know another person has a family. Hell yeah. By the way, that's literally why you guys talking about being molested is fucking genius and incredible for the world. Thank you so much. No, because other people want to hear that. And most people don't want to say that. Not anymore.

Not at my shows. Not in my meet and greets. Not like that. We got some meaty meet and greets we get to it should i call an ex and ask him how my asshole tastes oh my god she had a she had a goal here well no it's just because like bobby has never ever what he's never even tasted it your ass never why not he's kind of a prude actually like he's not a like we we freaky role play but we don't like do like a lot of freaky things you don't tootsie roll play

unless you guys want to eat my asshole and i would literally eat your ass i don't care oh my god you guys and again we bring us back to our only fans guys it's gonna be five thousand dollars it's not even sexual i would just want to like taste it it wouldn't even be like i would not be getting it off i would just be like this is cool i like that i'm doing this i would eat your ass are you being a pick me no i would eat your ass too if i knew for sure that you had showered recently wait is that a pick meme-girl thing to say? Pick-me-gay, I said. Esther, it's weird that every episode there's some sort of proposition that you'll crawl over and do something sexual.

I just think a woman's asshole is probably very clean. I know what I do. Mine's very clean. I don't think it's that big of a deal. There's no way your asshole is probably very clean like i know i know what i do mine's very clean i try like i don't think it's that big of a deal there's no way your asshole is really clean i've seen the state of your hair on the top of your head you think the private parts are cleaner than the outward part they are that's sick would you not eat kalilah's ass seriously think about it for a second you wouldn't just there's always a price there's always a price. There's always a price. So this is purely for-

For ratings? For ratings. Sure. Yeah, I mean, and that's, it would just be a very- Listen, I've never said no to eating tarantulas. Do you think I'm an asshole? I'll do whatever anyone asks me to do. I've never backed down.

Is that the snack for the day? Each other's assholes? Is that the food challenge? You guys, today's episode is sponsored by our friends at Manscaped, the leaders in men's below the waist grooming. It's back to school time and we want to make sure your man is packing the essentials to have his best year yet. The Manscaped fourth generation performance package is just that. We can't have all those pencils he's putting in his holes getting caught up in pubes. those pencils he's putting in his uh holes getting caught up in pubes um it is it's the perfect package for his package which includes the brand new lawnmower 4.0 get him the valedictorian of

ball trimming so he can join the two million men worldwide who trust manscaped by going to manscaped.com code trash this package includes the package includes the brand new Lawn Mower 4.0 and will give them the confidence to do anything you desire. Send them to Smooth Balls University to learn a thing or two, Annie. Listen, it spars the chemo hair. It's in different chunks. It's never consistent. Get rid of all of it.

If you're thinking I want to keep some because it's thinning in other areas, get rid of all the ball hair. We don't want it. Right. And you guys, it's not that – for me, it's not that i care that there's hair there i just need to know there's a little bit of effort in terms of grooming it's such a compliment to me like you know what i care about you and how and also because my my face is right there yeah so it's like just a little bit of consideration it goes a a very, very long way. The Lawn Mower 4.0 also has a 7,000 RPM motor,

a new multifunction on and off switch that can engage a travel lock in any. They have that 4,000 LED spot, 4,000K LED spotlight that you talked about. No hairs get left behind. And did you know that it was waterproof as well? So you can have that precision in the shower. I do. I get very horny when I shave, so it has to be. Seal the deal with Manscaped's liquid formulations.

Before heading out with your mans, he can use the Crop Preserver Ball Deodorant to keep him going in the heat. Thank you. Then after he trims the lawn and wax the weed in the heat, he can give his balls a boost and use the Crop Reviver. Thank you again. Get 20% off plus free shipping with the code trash at manscaped.com that's 20 off and free shipping with the code trash at manscaped.com this year have your man

graduate with a degree in clean balls from manscaped fall is here and we could all use a stiff breeze wouldn't you agree i would like a nice rod of stiff breeze. That's right. This episode is sponsored by Blue Chew. Guys, confidence can take you far in life. It can also help in the bedroom, especially when it comes time to step up to the plate. That's where Blue Chew comes in. And Blue Chew, if you don't know what we're talking about, is a unique online service that delivers the same active ingredients as Viagra and Cialis, but in chewable tablets at the fraction of the cost. So you can take them anytime, day or night. You can plan ahead or be ready whenever an opportunity arises. The process is simple.

Sign up at bluechew.com, consult with one of their licensed medical providers, and once you're approved, you'll receive your prescription within days. Here's the thing. They're chewable. It's like you already, you're going to take the medicine and you're going to already be exerting a lot of effort. So, you know, don't have to try to swallow things and do that. Just chew it, get ready to go. I mean, that didn't make sense. And the best part, it's all done online. So no visits to the doctor office, no awkward conversations, and no waiting in line at the pharmacy. BlueChew's tablets are made in the USA and prepared and shipped direct to your door in a discreet package, for those of you that are worried about that. With Blue Chew, men everywhere are excited to see the postman because when your package has arrived, your package has arrived.

So if you could benefit from extra confidence when it's time to perform, Blue Chew can help. And we've got a special deal for our listeners. Try Blue Chew free when you use our promo code Tuesday at checkout. Just pay $5 shipping. That's bluechew.com promo code Tuesday to receive your first month free. Visit bluechew.com for more details and more important safety information. And we thank Blue Chew for sponsoring this podcast. Ladies, Blue Chew is exclusively for men, but the end result is something you'll both enjoy.

So get your man to sign up now. You guys, I got my eyelashes done. Do they look good? They look good. Wait, you got them done? Yeah. By our girl, Aruna. No, Aruna doesn't do them, but there's a girl in her place that started doing it.

Oh, shout out, by the way, Aruna. Best eyebrow threader. Aruna threading. She's on La Brea and Santa Monica. So that's just, you get to wake up like that. Shut up. I wake up full stripper. I'm like, oh.

That's so cool. It takes me like one minute to do my makeup. It's crazy I was late. It's crazy. It's so disrespectful. It's more disrespectful than you know. This was earlier, though. I got this this at 7 30 in the morning thinking i wake up with such a plan you guys do you want to know something about me that probably most people don't know i cannot spend the night alone i am terrified i could have guessed that yeah yeah so what do you do

your family's around a lot when when bobby is out of town, I need my sister or my mom here. You know I would always drop everything and sleep over here. I would sleep in the garage. I don't care. I'll sleep anywhere on the floor. Doll Face Season 2 has been canceled due to the disappearance of – Come back. Esther lives here now.

We have one week left. I love sleepover so fucking much how dare you what do you do break it down for us like what would we be doing what okay todd and i are in the process of getting an arcade and a popcorn machine a popcorn machine shut up yeah i realized yesterday it's like I have to live my best life and the we were gonna go to the movies and I was like

I don't like the movies anymore you just want the popcorn I just want the popcorn and I was like let's just cut the fucking middleman out it's set we're doing the sleepover

at your place and we're getting a really big TV when when when when when when I want real dates one month I want hard plans he's we're ordering the TV today

popcorn machine I guess can come too I think they're only like 200 bucks they're not even that much and we're so we're ordering the tv today popcorn machine i guess can come too i think they're only like 200 bucks they're not even that much and we're so we're gonna have a sleepover at annie's place we're gonna take edibles we're gonna film it bring it bring dogs to bring dogs we're gonna taste kalilah's ass we're gonna we're gonna have an ass tasting test pre or post what does it pair with well with should i start drinking again is it good with white or red wine i think it goes with Jaeger myself. This asshole pairs well with a Jaeger bomb.

Did you ever do a Jaeger bomb? Did you ever drink at all? Never. I've never, still never tried it. This is next. Don't actually. No, I'm not. Weed is more controllable. Yeah, I'm going to chill.

I, do you know that you've sent me into a weed spiral? Because I keep thinking, if Esther can. You're not the only one. Literally, I've inspired many but I'm I can't but talk to me about it because why don't you what's your problem with it here's what happens okay so I don't really like everyone's why I smoke during the day right wait why don't we sat full self-sabotage can we do this over a banana break oh I wait I'm I love it when she's I'm gonna eat your asshole I know know. You're attracted to my assertiveness. You really are. Finally.

Thank you. No, okay. I want to hear this. Why? Because this is my big question. When I started trying edibles, I'm like, why would I always hear Whitney and Annie be like, I got to stop? Like, why?

Okay. It may be a personality type. It may be. It's got to be, I have a, cause I was thinking about it. Can I get, can I hypnotize myself to smoke weed appropriately? Or do I need to hit myself as myself to quit? Cause I'm very black and white. What do you do it? What's I go every time I consider smoking weed, every time I'm like about to smoke weed, I go, let's get the highest we've ever fucking been. Like, I'm never like, let's get a little high. I'm always like, I want to be like,

I want to wake up bottomless with like a Funyun bag. I want to have like my hair extension still in. Like I want the worst case scenario. So, but you're saying if you could just take a two and a half milligram,

take a five. Just relax with it a little bit. Then you'd be like, then you could do it all the time. It'd be no big deal. Right. But I can't and I eat like crazy i woke up this morning um i have an empty ramen cup of soup okay already this is already bad not like there's some noodles you know however nobody finishes

them i mean i drank and licked the styrofoam okay Okay, so a cup of soup. Those are 14 cents. 14 cents. By the way, can I borrow 14 cents? That's how you save. That's how you're rich. That's how I got the popcorn machine. Food that costs 14 cents. No wonder you can get a Tesla.

Then you can get a Tesla, bitch. You have more money than me. I got a car. Oh, yeah. Is that your car out there? What? It's really classier than I thought. You couldn't.

You got an Audi? Are we allowed to say? Something weird is going on. Why did you get a car? I have to. Why? I've been had to for the last five years. She's running away from us.

She's scared. You don't look at our transportation away from us? Yeah. I'll monitor the keys. Well, I have four dogs now. That Prius is not going to hold up much longer it's always so stressful when i have to like take them anywhere i have no doubt you're not going to have more dogs too i have no doubt that four is a cap don't put that shit on me and put that on the universe because you might be right why did you pick that car it was either that or like the rob for for me because it's about the

same size and they didn't have the Rob4 inventory. I guess they're low on the chips, the computer chips or something. That was my number one. And they were like, hey, Audi, you know, this and this. And I was like, I don't deserve anything like a luxury vehicle.

It's not me. That's not on brand for me because I'm a Corolla type of gal. But then I drove it and I was like, holy shit. Can I just say she's wearing Yeezys and a fucking Corolla. She's not a Corolla, of gal. No. But then I drove it and I was like, holy shit. Can I just say she's wearing Yeezys and a fucking Corolla? She's not a Corolla bitch. And that is what makes me cool.

Her dad talked her into some bullshit. That's what makes me cool. The Yeezys and the Corolla. Your dad talked. Esther, you're like two months away from wearing like having a grill or something. You're like, listen, bitch. I know you have money. You're about to pop with this money, okay?

I know it. Your friends are too famous. It's going to happen. You are an interesting influence. Listen. I will admit. I'm telling you, you can have it all. And I think you're rubbing off on Coloco as well.

Listen, guys. She got an Audi. I went in as an Esther. I left as a nanny from the car dealership. No, I was very impressed. It was a little tame of a color. Are you wearing Celine sunglasses? Yes, bitch.

Why do you think I put them on right now? Can I just tell you I've wanted a pair of Celine sunglasses my whole life? Let's go get them today. Let's leave right now. Let's cut this short to go get them. Where did you go get them? That's embarrassing. Why is that embarrassing?

Because it was a sunglass hut. I bought them like a poor bitch. Wait, is the sunglass hut? Sunglass. The sunglass hut is I bought them like a poor bitch. Wait, it's a sunglass hut? Sunglass. Sunglass hut is just not good. It's not good. Were they $400? They were $400, yeah.

But I looked at sunglasses that were $600, so then that felt cheap. I'm glitching. You have to try on the most expensive sunglasses first, and then the rest of them seem so cheap. I'm just leasing them, though. And then the rest of them seem so cheap. I'm just leasing them, though. Do we have some fan audio questions this week, George? Yes, we do. All right.

First question here is from Andrew. We love our boy slugs. Hi, Annie, Esther, and Kalilah. I have a hypothetical question for you. If you had the option to go back in time, would you do it? And how far back would you want to go? Love the podcast. Thanks a lot.

Thanks, Andrew. You know my answer is yes, 100%. I would just go back to like elementary school. I think she would take a Johnny Space Rocket back in time. Definitely go all the way back to elementary school. Oh, elementary. Yeah, and do it all. You saw that picture she posted. She was the fucking king of elementary school. Oh, elementary. Yeah, and do it all. You saw that picture she posted.

She was the fucking king of that school. Which picture? Your little gangster, like, kindergarten picture that you posted. I don't even remember that, but I was cool. Yeah. What's your favorite travel? She peaked in third grade. That is bad.

What was your favorite time travel movie of all time? Back to the Future. One and two. For sure. So I'm always saying that isn't a good movie and I can't allow that. That's. There's this one

that's really good with Rachel McAdams. It's called About Time. And I bawled my eyes out when I watched that. Never cried more in my life. Really? I cried from the minute

it started till I could cry. You know why? It's daddy issues. Daddy issues. I sat next to one of my boyfriends. I can't remember.

It was like, I always go on a first date. I went on a first date to Precious, the movie Precious. It was the same amount of crying and horror. I was like, ugh. Like my snot, like when you're hyperventilating crying during about time. Snot bubbles, yeah. It was beautiful.

But About Time is so good, Esther. I think you'll like that. Okay. Should we watch it on our sleepover? Yes. We better get a hard date for the sleepover. Okay. Because it's pissing me off that it hasn't happened.

Answer Andrew's question, Annie. This morning when I was getting that Starbucks and I would just say to myself, bitch, you're not going to be early. Just lower the standards. You're going to yell at a GPS. If you keep this up, you're going to be yelling at a GPS. you're gonna yell at a GPS if you keep this up you're gonna be yelling at a GPS no um I

I would like to go back in time to the other night when I was talking to my ex-boyfriend and I said my first boundary and I would like to say I would like to go like this you know what dude shut the fuck up I don't wanna fucking hear you talk anymore I fucking told you I didn't wanna hear this and I'm fucking tired

of like trying to make you feel good it's fucking annoying you haven't listened to to hear this and I'm fucking tired of like trying to make you feel good. It's fucking annoying. You haven't listened to anything I said and I'm fucking out, bitch. And then flicked a joint in his face. That's amazing. That's what I would have liked to have done. That's a great answer. I was mad at my – I was like, oh, I wish I'd been harder.

You know, it's not as good of an answer as reliving your entire elementary school, but it's pretty good. It's pretty predictable too. I want to go back in time to when my family doctor fisted my asshole but me too kalilah's definitely like there's she's screaming for help over here what's going on i want to go back in time to when i was about a year old and there's this video of me stealing um we were having a family party and i stole a chicken drumstick and my nanny was screaming like she has a drumstick and i shove it i go into bed and i shove it under a pillow and i

like sleep on it there was something very magical and real and true to my character in that moment that i kind of want to relive where i'm like what does that all mean why did i think i had to steal food and why did i shove it and try to hide it? It's just so weird because Bobby is, he does have a likeness to a drumstick. He does, he has the body type of a drumstick. Rotisserie chicken. Yeah, he does.

Yeah, yeah. Very chickeny. Why was it magical? When I look back at it, just the thrill you could see how excited I was about feeling like I had done something that I was getting yelled at. Actually, I don't think I was one. I think I was like two. You want to something that I was getting yelled at. Actually,

I don't think I was one. I think I was like two. You want to go back to feeling bad about something you did? Yeah. Like the horror of the people chasing me was really fun. And I'm like so happy. You like negative attention. So you're saying. Is that what it is? That's what it sounded like. I am sensing there's something about your imagination that was really enjoying that moment and that you want to have this like imaginative, fun experience like that. Maybe. Another thing I would go back to is did you ever threaten to run away? Yes. From home.

And did you? Yes. No one noticed. I ran behind a tree. Famously no one. And you look and you were waiting for them to find and they're just like cooking dinner. Yes. Famously I ran away.

No one noticed. And I just came home and that was it. How long? 40 minutes. Poor Esther. But I have a similar – this is – it's making me think of it. This is sad. It's kind of funny, but I really wanted a sink in my room. I really wanted my own sink.

And so I would do the creepiest thing where I would put a bowl of water in a drawer and I would just pretend that that was like my sink. I would open the drawer. Why did you want to sink? I don't know. We have to investigate. I don't know. We can get to it. We can't.

How old were you? I don't know. Were you Jacob the dog at this time? I was older than Jacob the dog. I was probably like, you know, fourth-ish grade, something grade something like that okay we're getting to being pretty old for this um did you like watching your mom do dishes or something no i think it was like i wanted of my own bathroom sink and that i could just play i loved playing with water because water was it's so weird to bathe so little but love to play with water i know i want to confess something

i am doing something to confess something i am doing something annie which i think you might find interesting and is that i've completely stopped watching any porn at all and i'm trying to get back to a place of just my imagination and i'm now because i'm trying to like reconnect with the blood flow into my vagina right yeah and esther's listening what's happening is if you because there's so many things that these are on the edge of her seat and about to slip off it so no more vibrators no more nothing so maybe i do no vibrators so i'm completely like resensitized so like i could come to a picture of some of a man's hand so my thing now is i am fapping fully fucking coming

to pictures of male hands oh i've i've i've gone completely amish and now it's like this is like a foot fetish you're gonna start just squirting yeah are you gonna be having a trouble having troubles out in the world when you see man hands i I think so. Now it's like... And by the way, does it count if they have fingernails on them? One time I was wearing press-on nails to Thanksgiving and my uncle said that I looked like I had transvestite hands and I always think that now. When I was a nursing student, the Korean ladies that I would, when they were patients, they would always grab my hand and be like, oh, you have really pretty hands. Take care of them.

And I felt so honored because if the Asian ladies know about skin care and good hands, and I think that's because I sweat so much. They've kept lubricated my whole life. For sure. Hands are a thing I think you just don't even think about until they're gone. And they go, oh, shit. Man's hands are hot. They are. hot there's no question could you guys come to picture of a man's hand absolutely not like torn up you know like when they're just biting and nervous they're so nervous to be around

so not do it for me but i'm so jealous of your current sexual tolerance man hands no more dick pics that does not work for me man hands there's certain like – there's a certain type of calf too that's really hot on a guy. For sure. Back, back. My neighbor growing up, my friend Matt like was so hot. Like he was just so – he was like my type and then it just – everything was hot that was like him forever. And Todd definitely has like all of it.

He's just like – Todd's just like tall and cute I mean he definitely like we smoke weed and eat some shit but I gotta like I gotta

I can't control my eating I gotta wait how did you make that transition what from talking about how hot your boyfriend is I just started thinking

about how fat we're getting I was like oh god we're getting fat I heard a new tip for if you smoke weed to not get the munchies is you rinse your mouth out with Listerine. Does that really work? Yeah.

Why? When you get horny, you just douche with it? How does that help? It cuts the mouth. It's the weed in your mouth that makes you hungry. It's like the enzymes or something? Oh, my God. I love that.

Try it out. Will you let us know? I start chugging it. I relapse on the alcohol. Will you let us know, Annie, if that works? Yeah. Do we have another question, George? Question from Britt.

Hey, you filthy little slug. Yes. My question is, have you ever eaten out a man's asshole? And if you have, let's hear the story. And if not, let's hear your thoughts. I was about to eat a man's asshole out. A woman with man's shoulders. Just kidding.

It's true. I don't, I'm not an asshole eater myself. I'm an asshole eater. I'm not either. Look at my face. This is a face of an asshole eater. You have those D-A-E's. Wait, I mean A-D.

No. Instead of A-S-L's, I was trying to say. A-E-L's. A-E-L's. Yeah of A-S-Ls, I was trying to say. A-E-Ls. A-E-Ls. Yeah, A-E-Ls. That's my girl. A, B, C, D. No, I have to do the whole alphabet to get to that.

Wait, is it really A-E-L? I can't. Ass eating lips. That's what we made up. Instead of dick sucking lips. Somehow the universe just gives me gems. I'm not even going to tell you why that's a gem, but it's a gem. Anyways, look at my face gonna tell you why that's a gem but it's a gem anyways look at my face why it's a gem i'll tell you after but esther's to leave i'm gonna

find out and she's never gonna know it's fine you're over fomo oh my god weed is a cure i never thought weed was a medicine until now it's a medicine for me i dose her with it i have a question for you guys so if dave and todd was like, hey, it's just – this really turns me on. 100% I would do it. Yes. That's what I'm saying. Then you are an asshole eater. It's just – it's whether it's, you know, a lot of men that I've been with don't ask for that.

But it's just I'm game for anything. Well, it depends on the guy too because I've definitely like dated a guy where it's like you can see – and he sucks and he's not like worried about me coming in anyway and then he's like I can see him sort of like inching his asshole closer to my face

when I'm blowing I'm like no no no we're not doing a hip thrust where your asshole no you're not you've done nothing for me

I'm gonna go to your asshole you've done nothing for me that is okay that is this is gonna sound so superficial

but I don't like it when men arch their back. No. It's gay. I'm sorry. It's gay. I'm sorry, okay? Cancel me for the truth.

Cancel me for the truth. Okay, even if they're going down on me? I'll go down on this fucking ship, okay? But I will not go down on a man that arches his back. Here's what I'll say. Okay, if a guy is going down on me, and if I look this way, and his ass is arched as he's eating me out, I am, for some reason that does not work for me, flatten your bodies and your legs hang low.

I'd rather cow than cat, if you know what I mean. I'd rather cow than cat. I'd rather have you arched in a way that looks like your ass is pushing in. Yes, cow. We need cow. No cat. Please no cat. Try to just be regular, please.

Which one is cow and which one is cat? Cow is up like this and cat. Wait. Cat is arched. Cat has to be arched, right? Yeah. I gotta say. I gotta say.

Esther's heard of yoga. I don't know if she's done it. She looks cute in the clothes. I don't know if she's ever. I've never seen her sweating in them. Here's another thing I planned for us. On our trip to hawaii we're doing a yoga session with my favorite yoga instructor cara she's going to lead a session

for us and we're going to record it oh i love that yeah that's great amazing anything you want me to do i'll do yeah we're going to do it anything is this getting planned for real yes esther everybody schedules work so are we bringing boys we are. Yeah, because we cannot be left to our own devices. Dave is coming because Dave wants to go to Hawaii. Yeah, I can't go to Hawaii without my- We're going, yeah. I don't know if Bobby can come, but he's going to- Do you think people are going to think Todd's Hawaiian?

Mm-hmm. He's a local boy. He's so cute. I'm going to make him climb up a tree and get me a coconut. Oh. I have to go to work. Johnny Rockets calls. Johnny Rockets.

No, Dollface. It's their last week. My parting words are thank you so much. I love you guys so much, and I will eat your ass. And I swear if we don't get a fucking sleepover and a trip to Hawaii, and I'll even throw out the Vegas thing on the book soon, I'm quitting the show. Will you eat my ass out in my Tesla?

I will. You know what? If you, if you, listen to me, Annie. You stick it out from the window and I will eat it from outside. But you're inside. Now I want to get the one with these ones because I want it to, I want it to like, I want the doors to go like this. When does your Tesla come?

End of December. Okay. Exciting. We're going to just gang bang. We'll just have a gang bang in the Tesla. I'm getting a wrap on it too. We have to figure out the wrap. Also, do you guys want to get a billboard? a bus stop yeah in k-town yeah let's get a billboard okay yeah let's get a billboard i want a billboard george george get us a billboard now

fucking billboard if you're gonna start dressing up like us get us a fucking have fun at work have fun to have all your famous rich friends. Oh, my God. Our little Hollywood starlet. I had cat cow pulled up. That's so funny what you just said. Oh, that's so funny. So basically this. Let me show you guys what I don't want when I get eaten out.

Okay. All right. For all the audio listeners, Annie is on her back. They're a long ways from my microphones. Kalilah is. This is what I don't want. I don't want this. And he's spreading her legs.

Kalilah... In the distance of you, that your ass is sticking out. Yeah, and then I don't want to... I shouldn't be able to see your ass over your shoulder. Yeah, that's all that matters. Kalilah has her butt up in the air. Very much like a cow pose in yoga. So I want just a little more arch and then flatten your legs on the bed, okay?

Don't be like this. Yeah, forgot to take those off. Because you're perching your ass when we get fucked by a dog. Do you understand? I'm not going to do that. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it.

I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. A little more arch and then flatten your legs on the bed, okay? Don't be like this. Yeah, for God's sake, don't do that. Because you're perching your asshole to get fucked by a man. Do you understand? You're perching your asshole to get fucked by a man. Which is totally okay. It's totally okay. And also, by the way, bi guys, you get the most pussy.

We know it, okay? We know that you get the most pussy bi men. But it's because we're leaning into the arch. But it's like when I'm trying to like when i want a fucking rod okay it cannot be delivered with an ass that's puckered and ready to get penetrated for me i'm not you can do that but here's another thing i've been thinking about with kink shaming and stuff okay so obviously everybody you probably all know that i I pixelate my feet because men are always asking for pictures of my feet and I found out I was on wiki feet and it

just like freaked me out. I didn't realize I had this like genital that was exposed. And so now I'm saving my feet for marriage. Your genital wears cowboy boots. My genital is covered by a cowboy of cow pose pose my point was when when the foot fetish people get mad at me for pixelating my feet it's like first of all it's a the reason it's a it doesn't exist if it's accepted yeah the hot part is that it's weird and people don't like it you know what i mean like that is what a kink is yeah like if we all were like okay and it's not like i don't care

what people do to other people's bodies that are consenting. It's like not my problem. But if you want, you can't have my feet. But also it's kind of up the value of your feet a little bit. Sure. Yeah. So I think it's a very good marketing strategy in my opinion. Let's add some zeros to this one.

You can see these feet. Okay. And this hand will turn into a foot real quick. Would you eat asshole even if it killed you? I don't know. Her saying that her asshole is cleaner than her outside is cannot be correct. I just want to know. I think there's stigma around stinky genitals. I need to know how you wipe. If I see her one time wiping back to front, it's over. I know her entire routine of asshole cleaning and I am out. Well, here's the thing. I do not have a bidet. Right. But I will never. You do mechanical. Mechanical. Filipinos do mechanical. I'll show you great mechanical cleaning with a cabo. Tabo. Yeah. What's it called? Tabo. It's like this thing we, it's like a, you can use anything.

A water bottle or you can use like a cup. And I'll teach you guys the technique next time. Let's show it. We should show it on the net. You need mechanical washing. This looks like the cure to hemorrhoids that I found on YouTube. Have you ever had a hemi? Of course.

I think – aren't they for life? You can get a hemorrhoidectomy. You have to them removed if it bothers you. Because I had a friend who had a little cherry down there and it was really starting to like pop out and she had to push it back in and it hurt her a lot. Like the friction and the dryness. I've never had like painful hemorrhoids. You're lucky because they can hurt a lot. I'm very lucky. Listen, when it comes to hemorrhoids, I'm a fucking lucky ass bitch, okay? I haven't had, I don't have one yet.

I'm sure I have a lot of internal ones. I think everyone does. I do feel like I've learned my lessons. Like you can't sit on the toilet too long. You definitely can't – there's a feeling of a stretch that you know something's going wrong. You're tearing something and something will come in its place. Something will fill it. It's like – A baby.

Tiny little baby. A tiny little – a mini hemi. Allmi all right guys this has been so fun esther's abandoned us uh for hollywood are you guys a cat or are you a cow comment below thank you guys so much for watching please like subscribe tell your friends tell your girlfriends tell your boyfriends tell everyone we're here We made this all for you. Please enjoy. Bye, guys. Bye. Oh, good, good. Hey, sorry. What time is it over there? Six in the morning. Oh, shit. This is is very important we're glad we woke you up this is not the question you want to hear at six in the morning i don't think

give it a go why not let's have a crack okay speaking of crack you're very on brand um i just want to know because i've never had a point of reference before and I've never had anyone tell me anything in regards to how I actually taste. But I wanted to know if you can remember what my asshole tastes like. Delicious. Maybe this is what he wanted to wake up to. okay you can you're free to expand on how delicious now on a scale of battery acid and uh triple a to double to a d battery yeah double d battery double d battery okay what's a double what does that even mean um definitely up there look i don't i don't just go down on any random chick it's gonna have to be my partner's ass so you're definitely up there

i'll tell you that much so oh this is like a like a romantic comedy right now okay i'm swaying so much right now i have to hang up thank you so much for answering that question. And I'll hit you up later to apologize, okay? Yeah. Yes, thank you. I'm going to pull out my laptop now and the porno channel's coming on. Yeah, he's definitely like so hard. All right, I'll hit you up later. Take care.

All right, we miss you. You sound so hot. I don't know if I've seen an ugly Australian man. He's not ugly. I just couldn't really deal with the pressure of that. I thought he might say it wasn't good. I was stressed. I was stressed.

The opposite happened. And how did it make you feel? Caught off guard because I wasn't, he would have been like, it was fine. I didn't know he would say delicious. Maybe this is time for you to realize. I'm delicious. Maybe this is time for you to realize. I'm delicious? That you, yeah, your image of yourself is not accurate. It doesn't match those around you.

Maybe this is a groundbreaking moment for you. Maybe. Maybe my ass is delicious, George. And maybe I should have him speak to Bobby and say, hey, her ass is delicious. Give it a whirl. And so do you think you've taken on Bobby not wanting to eat asshole as him not wanting to eat your asshole? Yes. Yes. You've taken something personally.

I took it personally. I have been taking it personally. And it's just not something that he likes to do ever for anyone. I don't think if Jesus came down and spread his cheeks apart and said, Bobby, I need you to eat my ass. I don't think Bobby would. He's grossed out by it. He just doesn't want to do it. But that's the truth. I just didn't. I didn't know that was the truth. Now I know it might. Yeah, maybe you need to be like, listen, I'm top on the menu in Australia. OK, the Vegemite comes second to my asshole. OK, I got the veggie munch right here. I love how you call it Vegemite. What is it? Vegemite? Vegemite.