Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Chelsea Peretti & Rudy Jules are Anti - Slop

Episode Date: December 17, 2024

Happy 200th! Peretti & Rudy are Here! To Celebrate: PLEASE show you’re love and Like & Subscribe to Our Channel --->  https://www.youtube.com/@TrashTuesday    Thank you to our Sponsor(s)! *HERS* Start your free online visit today at https://www.forhers.com/trashtuesday That’s F-O-R-H-E-R-S dot com slash trashtuesday for your personalized weight loss treatment options.  *Listen to Esther's New Solo Pod!* https://www.esthersgrouptherapy.substack.com *Visit Ebb Ocean Club & Holiday Shop* https://www.ebboceanclub.com/ for Khalyla’s reef safe and biodegradable hair products! ___________________________________________________________________ MORE CHELSEA PERETTI! WEBSITE: https://chelseaperetti.komi.io/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/chelsanity/... PODCAST: Call Chelsea Peretti https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast... More Rudy Jules:  IG: https://www.instagram.com/rudyjuless/  Bad Friends Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@BadFriends Tigerbelly Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@TigerBelly FOLLOW TRASH ON SOCIALS:  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@itstrashtuesday More Esther: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@esthermonster Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster/ More Khalyla:  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk/ Tigerbelly Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@UCIyIoM_Nd8HtY19fuR_ov2A  PRODUCTION: Production Team: Tiny Legends, LLC:  https://www.instagram.com/tinylegends.prod/ Stella Young: https://www.instagram.com/estellayoung/ Guy Robinson: https://www.instagram.com/grobfps/ Ariel Moreno: https://www.instagram.com/jade.rabbit.cce/ Edited By: Case Blackwell:  https://www.instagram.com/caseblackwell/    

As the constipation queen, Jules, what has worked the best? Matcha. Really? That's what I do every morning. I drink matcha or coffee and then I just... But sometimes... You're a woman of few words, but when you speak it, you really make it count. Slugs, I am so excited to share with you that I am acting on a scripted podcast that is exclusively available on Audible. It's called Very Unbecoming, and if you like this show, I know you will love it, check it out.

I also have a solo podcast available at esthersgrouptherapy.substack.com, linked below, and Chicago, San Francisco, Vancouver. I will be in those cities, and I think you can get tickets somewhere, probably the link in my Instagram bio. I can't wait to see you guys. That'll all be happening in the new year. You guys see Esther's beautiful hair?

Who me? That's because? Eb Ocean Club. Eb Ocean Club is clean hair care for everybody. It's a brand that I launched this year. Go to eboceanclub.com or follow eboceanclub on Instagram. I love it so much. I keep it at my parents' house.

I keep it in my bathroom. It makes me feel like I'm a little ocean princess. Thank you for inventing it for me personally. You're very welcome. Go to eboceanclub or at eboceanclub on Instagram. Start your free online visit today at forhers.com slash trash Tuesday. That's F-O-R-H-E-R-S dot com slash trash Tuesday for your personal and weight loss treatments. Forhers.com slash trash Tuesday.

Hers weight loss is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not FDA approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality prescription required restrictions apply. We go via an isometric or not compounded. Well, welcome back Chelsea Ferretti. Thank you. Thank you. Also 200th episode guys. Oh my goodness, what an honor.

Yeah. What an honor, congrats. Handpicked our favorite guests, truly our favorite guests. Really? I mean, come on. You know that. You know, listen, a repeat podcast appearance,

I clearly enjoyed myself as well. Or the lighting. And what I'm realizing is like, actually this is how you hang out with people. It's like in LA, you have to like kind of pitch a project. If you want to see your friends, you're like, should we get together to write? And then they'll actually show up.

Are you traumatized by the last time we hung out and how I was in a zombie catatonic new mom state? No. You're not traumatized by that? Look how tender I am when you ask that. No. Being a new mom is a whole journey. Okay.

Well, you didn't walk away like, wow, I've Esther's, I'm, that's, she's not doing good. I mean, I don't know what, I wasn't sure what was going on, but you didn't seem like you were like, the baby's in danger. But I did feel like you seemed like, you know, maybe a little listless.

Listless, well, she has chicken pox. I don't have chickenpox. Show me your body. You would go to like a chickenpox party. I would, no I got chickenpox at Disney World like all the other little kids. Wait can you show us? Oh my God, what is that?

I woke up in the middle of the night, I'm like I have chickenpox, I'm like itching at Google chickenpox, but it's not. It would be, what is it? Rickets or whatever, when it comes back when you're old, it's not rickets. No it's shingles. I've already had shingles, so it's not bad. That's for like people in their elder years.

I had it at 25. How? I was really stressed out. It was cause I first started, when I was 25 was the first time I had coffee. And I think that gave me shingles. Cause I got really excited about coffee and like how it made me feel.

And I think that gave me stress. When did you get it? What part? Shingles, I had it like this. Wait, but your chicken pox now is all the way up to your armpit. Yeah, I have it all over, but it's bug bites. I changed my sheets.

Okay, that's my next question. I don't know, that seems like bed bugs or something, right? I think so. That's what I was wondering and afraid of was bed bugs, in which case we have to burn this whole studio down. But Dave doesn't have any bites. But he lies about his illness. Bed bugs don't bite men.

That's gonna see if you believe me, but it's too, it's too pointed. How do you change your sheets? Wow, we're starting out with a bang. Esther, how often do you change your sheets? Okay, first you guys go. I don't. I don't handle that.

But how often does it get handled? No idea. Really? I was honestly thinking about that today, like should I ask? And then I was like, who cares? They seem pretty clean. You know?

I'm a once a weeker, once one and a half. What about you, Jules? Once a month. Oh yeah, once a month. Teen, yeah, young, young. I think I'm still on my teen, I'm in my teen era when it comes to sheets. So what's that?

You know, definitely once a month, but if I wake up with a lot of bites, or Donut brought a lot of like dust into the bed and sand, maybe the next day I'll throw a load in, I don't know. They love bringing that stuff into the bed, the dogs. Yeah. Does your dog sleep in your bed? No.

What? I know you look like you had like hoped you had a friend in that. I think, first of all, even small dogs can just take up the whole bed. Like it's crazy. And I can't deal with that. Like I can't cuddle someone and fall asleep.

That stands for humans and dogs. Like I need to be in my own little sleep chamber. Yeah. But I do have his bed at the foot of our bed. On a bench. Is that acceptable? Is that nurturing? I think so.

Yet boundaries. So first of all, I brought this cause I felt like you would like it, Esther. What is it? This is cinnamon snickerdoodle nut butter. I brought you one as well. Oh my god. Sorry, I didn't know you were gonna be here.

It's okay, it's my bad. Here, we can taste the jellies together. Where did you get this? I felt like I could see you sucking that down. I got it at a little known shop. I also brought a passion fruit chocolate bar. That I might be into. That's so weird. I thought about your fruit loves,

as well as a strawberry chocolate bar. That's so strange. Strawberry bar chocolate. Wow, this one might be the winner though. Yeah, but I don't know, strawberry could be good. You never know. And then I of course brought two scones. From? From Proof. A love proof.

I've never had their scones though, so I don't know. They're walnut ginger, interesting flavor combo. Interesting, I recently did have a ginger scone and was pleasantly surprised by it. Now Proof is a bakery where there's always a long line. So these should be a good scone. Have you ever get a Proof? I've never been, because the line is too long.

Bocadillo sandwiches. The little baguettes we call them. Yeah, the baguettes. Should we have a scone showdown? Why not? I'm just really into this Lilikoi, but we'll see. Look how many lipsticks were in my pocket. That's a mad woman.

Four liners and three lips. Are those all currently present on the face? I'm having like a bit of a breakdown. Say more. I wore my trench coat. I'm like, you know what? I just got this on a sale and I was like, I've worn it to everything I've been to.

And it's, I just started feeling like a school shooter. I'm like, I need to take this off. And then yeah, makeup wise, I'm going back to the water line. I don't know. Did the water line just disappear for a few years? Was that it? For I think decades. Yeah. And I don't know why, because I've always loved when you, I love a water line. Oh, but it is not good for you.

Oh, dead by the end of the episode. I don't know, nothing really is. We're all full of plastic. It's like, I don't know. Did the young kids do waterline, Jules? I haven't seen anyone do the waterline. Have I been just waterlining all these years and no one's told me? Why did I do it? Why did I do it?

Wait, no one has had any of this. Oh, I saw it. I saw someone do it online, of course. That's why. Oh. TikTok? Why do you do anything? No one else is trying the Passion Fruit Chocolate? I'll try it.

I just needed her to open it, but then she passed it to you. Oh, sorry. By the way, this is pretty rude of you because you know I don't think fruit is really a dessert. I think fruit- That's not fruit, it's chocolate. It's not, I mean, there's no way, no doctor would be like, eat that, it's fruit.

I'm gonna make that up. But it's a fruit flavored chocolate. How is this even chocolate? I don't know, it also looks like white chocolate, which is not really chocolate. It's good. It's very good. It's very good. Esther, fruit's not dessert, like any fruit.

Everyone hold on. It's interesting though. Yeah, see? You both are so quick to go, it's good, but now. Interesting. Well, I liked the tart, but then it almost has like a tea flavor. It almost feels like it.

And like. It's too much like a fruit. Whatever, that's enough. That's enough of that. I would never eat it again. That's interesting. Give us a few minutes of content. That's all you could really ask for.

What do you think? It's really sour. No, I don't like it. Which is why I love passion fruit. I actually kind of do like it. Yeah. But it's weird. I'm not tasting the passion fruit. I mean, let's say there's like Halloween was recent

and I ate a lot of my son's candy. It's like, it doesn't compare to a Twix in any way. It's probably 10 times the cost. Thank you so much because I'm actually shocked to hear you say that. Why? Because I feel like you prefer like more high end,

intricate, less sugary desserts, but it is, you just said this and I can't, I like, we have it on camera. I didn't. No, like Twix, there's no fine chocolate or fine fancy dessert that is better than a Twix, a Snickers, Sn snickers. Sorry the plural Or just like the regular candy bars

Sly it is not good. Okay. She's all I can think about she tuned me out I I mean I I could argue with you about it. I don't even know where my heart really lies. I do think that Expensive milk chocolate is amazing. You know, I convinced myself dark chocolate is good because I'm fat. You're a grown up. But I do think expensive milk chocolate's amazing and probably does blow a twix out of the water

in the right situation. But I don't know, it's like mac and cheese, right? Like Kraft is always gonna be bomb. I love Kraft. Yeah, it's incredible. And Stouffer's, I grew up eating a lot of Stouffer's microwave mac and cheese. For me it was the ravioli, the canned ravioli is-

Chef Boyardee? Chef Boyardee is still in for me. Oh my God, SpaghettiOs? Never got into that. That's like the best taste to me forever. But we can taste the aluminum. That's just the best. It's the nostalgia. Same with like Velveeta.

No, no. I'm really in a Christmas present kind of state of mind. I'm doing it, what I consider early this year, but I realized it's in two weeks, but I would get you, if I were close enough to get you a Christmas present. Let's hang out a lot in the next few days. I would try to find you a vintage chef boyardee shirt.

Well, I think that's what you should get her. No, no. Spaghetti oats. Oh, spaghetti oats. Yeah, vintage spaghetti oats. Oh, you're like on a vintage shirt journey. Like this is vintage. And do you-

You see that one? It's really cute. Mine is too, but I don't know where it's from. Where do you search like eBay or? No, I go into brick and mortar stores. Have you ever heard of those? No, tell me more. It's like an actual building you can enter

and then there's items in it. So it's old school, but I kind of as a throwback, a little hat tip to yesteryear, I go into stores and purchase items. So that's cool. I can't say where I go. Have you been to Raggedy Threads in Little Tokyo? No.

It's a good one. It's a good name. Is it in that little square where that? Yeah. It is. Oh, then maybe I have been in there. Good stuff. Should we try the scone?

Yeah. Oh yeah. From Proof. Have you had, have you had a scone there before? I don't think I've had these. Oop, let me tell you, this feels so promising. Not for my cholesterol, but for this bit. Wait, did I tell you that I have high cholesterol too?

Wait, do we all? What? I have high cholesterol. Yeah, did you ever fix it? Do you have any tips? Oh my god. Bad timing. You eat scones and then get on Lipitor.

Okay. I don't know, I think I'm gonna get on Lipitor. Okay. How high are we talking? I blotted out. I blot everything out. This is amazing. There was a scone off.

There was a big scone debate. Esther, your stance on scone was? I don't remember. This one's perfect. This one is, this is an amazing scone. This is great. Even our young naysayer likes it. We did ginger.

What else? Oh my God. Walnut. Walnut? Fuck yeah. That's good. I knew it was out of my head. That's incredible. Let's. Fuck yeah. That's good. I knew it was out of my head. That's incredible.

Let's talk about why hard. I can't believe you guys are agreeing. I mean, hard is the strangest word for this. It's like flaky, light, buttery. Hard outside. Well, because you know what? Hard, you're not gonna find that in any good pastry. You're not gonna find hard except for scone.

Yeah. So that's to me, a find hard except for scone. Yeah. So that's to me, a hardness is what a scone makes it stand out. I don't know if this would apply to scones, but I feel like it's called like crumb in cake baking, like the outer browned exterior, but maybe not for scones, but it's the flaky, crunchy exterior with the soft, it's almost like a biscuit. We've discussed that, right?

That scones are like biscuits. I don't think we have. And I don't think they are like biscuits. Yeah, these are crumbly, but not flaky. I wouldn't say flaky. Crumbly. Are you trying to fight with me? Yeah.

You want it to be our fight this time? Flaky is like a croissant, right? I mean, to me, I guess you're right in the sense of like, oh my God, I'm literally covered in crumbs. I know, by the way, that's a flaw of the scone. And my doctor, I'm like, I eat pretty healthy. She's like, your cholesterol's through the roof. I'm like, no, no.

And then you just close up on crumbs covering my entire shirt and lap. I guess flaky isn't the right word. Something about that light, buttery feel makes me think of flaky. Sorry. Wait, how high is your cholesterol, Esther? I don't know.

I don't know. I don't wanna know. Oh my God, it's in my hair and everything. The Jim Bros, you know, they think high cholesterol is like a myth. Really? Yeah, cause I think if you go on like a, if your diet is like predominantly meat, protein,

good fats, then your cholesterol is naturally, that's their belief. So they kind of just like don't listen to doctors who say they have high cholesterol. So I don't know. I do feel like cholesterol is more of a mindset. Okay. Like at least that's what I thought

until I got my test results, but I just assumed because I'm until I got my test results, but I just assumed because I'm... I saw your test results, but your good cholesterol is also high. Is that good? I don't think it's like too much of a concern. Really? Yeah.

My good is high too. Do you also feel like doctors don't know what they're doing, anyone? Do you feel like you're getting mixed messages from your doctors, anyone out there? Let me see, my doctor said my Bell's palsy would be gone in two weeks, and here we are two months later.

That's crazy. So- But it's so much better. It is, but I mean, my eyes still can't close, right, so. Sorry I'm turned away from you while I empathize with you. I'm just hunting for my light. Oh no, oh no.

That's so sad about your Bell's palsy. Two months is insane, girl. Thank you, by the way. The acupuncturist whose info you sent me was so good. So, so good. I mean, I should try this person. I got a recommendation from a friend who had Bell's palsy. Oh. Yeah.

But I've never been. Yeah, poke acupuncture, Russell. Yeah. He's great. I cry every session. Why? Because it's Yeah, poke acupuncture, Russell. Yeah, he's great. I cry every session. Why? Because it's more than just acupuncture. It's like a whole like mind experience. Like he's talking to you or what?

Yeah, like he's, I'm not kidding, yeah he does. And he has all these little like profound little things like in the room that you can read. And it's just like, it's a really like a, it's a whole body, mind experience. That's sort of how I am experiencing my pelvic floor physical therapy. It's become-

Are they sticking a finger in your vag? Yeah, they are. Really? Oh my God, Esther, I can't believe you're doing that. And can I tell you, it is, it's mind blowing because they're, what? It's just funny. They're sticking a finger in my vagina

and like pressing on certain muscles in there. And you go, okay, someone's in my vagina. This must be sexual. No, it literally just feels like if you had a really tight like massage that you needed, like a tight muscle, it's like, oh my God, I needed that, I needed that. But it's weird, because someone is inside your vagina,

but it's not sexual. This makes me so icked out. And you know what, that's why I'm here. Like I wanna be more evolved, but I have a friend who also was doing this same thing. Me. Yeah. Why do they have to massage your vagina?

What an innocent question. Because I have a hypertonic pelvic floor, which means that it's like really... They sell it at Air One. That's what it means. It's a little tonic you can purchase at Air One. It means my vagina is really tight, but in a bad way. In a very bad way. Only after pregnancy or always? That was my question.

No, only after. But it was like- Imagine getting tighter after pregnancy. No, I know. I literally was like, I don't need a pelvic floor therapist because I thought you would only need it if like your pussy's falling out.

And it turns out you could need it for the opposite reason. I have seen the other side of it though. My friend got a prolapse after giving birth and she does have to tuck it back in a lot. What does that mean? What does that mean, her vag or her ass? Well, you can get both, Chelsea.

Okay, cool. You can have a little rattlesnake rattler from like an anal prolapse, but your vag can literally like drop out of itself. And what do you do for that? Push it back in. No way. That's what she does. She does when you really have a pelvic floor therapist. I'm sure there's a procedure you can do,

but she just kind of was like, she had a really traumatic birth and she was like, ah, fuck it, I never want anyone prodding in there again. So now she just has to carry her vagina around. Oh my God. I'm telling you, if someone put some fingers in there and just pressed. Is'm telling you, if someone put some fingers in there and just like pressed.

Like Dave fucking you right. Wait, hold on. So, okay, here's my question. How did you know you needed this therapy? I didn't for a long time and was a lot of like trial and error, but basically I had all these symptoms that were like mimicking like as though I had like an infection.

So it would be like always- Oozing like oozing cottage cheese. No. Like always burning on fire, like really irritated, really tense. And the doctors were like, there's, we're tested you, there's nothing, there's nothing. And I was like, trust me, it's on fire.

Like I- And the doctor's like, let me test you again, sticks his fingers up your crotch. Okay, this is just a standard test, Ezra. And like, he just keeps testing you over and over. So hot. Well, that's what happened to me. I know. It is cool.

I'm so sorry that happened to you. You have to be really careful around here. That is literally how she was busted. Oh my God. When I first came from- What a rat's nest. Hornet's nest? What is the nest?

I've stepped into a nest of badness. Sorry. When I first came from the Philippines, I was 15 and I didn't know how any type of medical procedures were supposed to be conducted. And my family doctor, I would go in for a cold or a hurt shoulder, and he would give me a pelvic exam every single time. And he would give my sister a full exploratory anal exam.

And then we were too ignorant to think... We were just like, wow, American healthcare is so thorough. That's literally what we thought. He would give us a head to toe. And it wasn't until later on, when were just like, wow, American healthcare is so thorough. That's literally what we thought. He would give us a head to toe. And it wasn't until later on when I went to nursing school where one of my instructors was like, wait, why did you get that many pelvic exams?

And I was like, oh, cause I had a thorough doctor. He was like, no. And then I looked up the guy over the pandemic and he lost his license. He, I just had no- Where's my camera? This is fucked up. Oh, they're both pointing to different cameras.

Ooh, fuck, no. No, I know it's not that, because that's what I'm, okay. That's fucked up. I know. I know. Damn. It's so fucked up.

Not so funny anymore, but- Well, listen, listen. Abuse is prevalent and horrific, but God, I mean. Nothing to say. I know, I'm self editing, I'm self editing. No, that's psychotic. And, but yeah, I just, it's hard for me to think, I don't know, just someone sticking their fingers

in your cooch. I know that that is physical therapy therapy postpartum or whatever, but it would be so hard for me to feel like this was a professional experience. It is though. It's a doctor, a physical. No, I know it is. I know it is.

And I went to physical therapy after my baby as well, because I had diastasis or I still do, because you can only fix it with surgery. So basically you can improve it by strengthening your core or whatever. And I went to physical therapy for that. And she was like, in the US, there's no postpartum healthcare.

Whereas in other countries, it's like for a year, you're getting physical therapy or this or that. And here they're just like, bye. It's so crazy. And I thought I was fine. And then it wasn't until like maybe six months postpartum where I was like, oh no, I'm actually having a serious issue.

And I actually read this article, this interview with, you know, the actress Zosha Mamet? Yeah. She was- Is that how you say it? I don't know, but I was only reading the article. But she had a similar thing where she said that for years, she thought she had UTIs and she would keep getting tested.

And they're like, you're negative for UTIs. And she was like driving her crazy. And she found out it was the same thing, hypertonic pelvic floor. So it can cause- So many people are listening right now with their pussy stinging out of control. And they're like, by Jeeves, I've got it.

I hope so, cause it was actually really horrible. What about urea plasma? What the hell, you have that too? No, I think this is what I had for a long time. And I don't think they test it at any gynecologist because it is something apparently, I just learned about this. You can pass it back and forth

between you and your partner. Cause I used to get frequent UTIs when I was in my twenties, but only with a single partner. Listen, honey, there are some people who I've dated, I had infections on a constant basis. It's like, I think it's people who don't like have oral hygiene. Something.

Make of that what you will, but you don't brush your teeth and I'm breaking out in hives. I'm gonna put, no, I'm just kidding. I didn't have hives, but I did get like frequent problems with certain people. Yeah. That, yeah, that's so real. I feel like you've talked about that,

where it's like your bacteria doesn't match up or. Something, or now that I know what urea plasma is, I think that's what I had, because it mimics the symptoms of like UTIs or BV or yeast infection, and it was only with this one guy over and over and over again. Name him. Obviously.

People are so into naming people now. Name him. It's not your fault. Yeah, congrats on your pelvic floor. So how often do you have to do that? I go once a week, but it's not all that. It's like, I also do like, I'm working on strengthening

like the surrounding muscles and all. It's like normal physical therapy, except someone figures you. So you're like, are you, is it like, you're laying like you're gonna get a pap smear or something? It's like, no, just laying regular. No, my legs aren't in the straps. Oh, the stirrups.

Yeah, it's more relaxed. Your legs are together and they're having to force their way in. No, they're just laying, I don't know. Butterfly position. Jules, have you finally got your pap smear? Yeah, last year, I think. How was it? I was scared at first because I kept seeing videos on TikTok

where they said like, it's so painful. Like, it's so scary. Yeah. And then I got it. And then the girl, the doctor just put her something. The speculum. Yes. And then it was fine. It wasn't that scary. The doctor just put her something, the speculum. And then it was fine. It wasn't that scary.

No, I wonder who's saying it hurts so bad. Why would a pap smear hurt really bad? I think like IUD placements, I think is supposed to be like very, very painful for some. And then they don't offer any type of like pain control or anything like that. Sucks. I think pap smear, so, if you are clenching,

then it hurts. We all don't have tight pussies like you. You're like, I don't know how to put this, but if you have an extremely tight pussy, what a journey through pelvic floor health. Yeah, so that's my story. I have a question for everybody but specifically for you. How are we feeling about TikTok maybe going away forever? Is that it really? I don't believe in it. There's been constant threats to TikTok though. I feel like well

they're they're always gonna make something else other than after TikTok. Cause before TikTok there was vines musically. So. I know I honestly like, I haven't really managed to catch the bug for TikTok. How do you get your impact? I don't know. I just haven't like, and it's weird cause I'm very addictive

with technology and different communities, but for whatever reason, I've just not, I'll go on there and I'll make stuff, but in terms of scrolling for hours, as people in my family have said they do, young people, I'm like, I just am not... I just sort of think that it's all like a hoax and a fraud that it'll go away.

I feel like the government and companies, they just put on these little shows for us, and it's like fake. Did you guys see those orcas wearing salmon as hats? Hmm, what? What did you say, bitch? Of all people you'd- I would have, but I haven't.

I mean, I probably will tonight. See ya. So as a fashion trend, there was an orca whale 37 years ago that started wearing salmon as a hat. And then the rest of the pod followed suit and they were like, wait, this person is a fashionista, trailblazer, we're all gonna wear salmons as hats.

And then now they're seeing the trend again. They're seeing this other killer whale wearing the same hat and it's from the same lineage they're suspecting of that same killer whale 37 years ago who wore it who wore hats. But do they have hands? How do they put the hats on? Esther they're very mobile in the water they can just float the salmon and then push their head up against it look at it. Oh wait they, it's like sushi style salmon. Stella, I don't know about that picture. I think that's an AI one.

My question basically is, how do you guys feel about animals having fashion dress? Sad, really sad actually. I feel sad about that. Orcas do all kinds of interesting stuff though. I mean, it is interesting. They seem to have generational things passed down like that. Yeah, like Gladys, how she was taking down

all of those boats in the Canary Islands. Do you hear about that? I'm not on a first name basis with this orca like you are, but I have heard that story. I actually love that name though. Gladys, yeah, her name was Gladys and she had been hurt by a boat engine or propeller in the past. So she made it her mission to start taking down boats in the Canary Islands and then

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Prescription required, restrictions apply. We go vegan, as I'm big, are not compounded. I don't love the idea of animals and getting involved in any kind of fashion trends just because fashion makes me so sad. Trends, trying to look good. Really? Getting involved in any kind of fashion trend just because like fashion makes me so sad like Trends like trying to look good. I really I yeah I thought you were into it I am but it still makes me sad and like when I think of my I think you have a similar fashion thing to

me where it's like You kind of feel like you want the look of like not trying Yeah, because then you look cooler like it's's like the worst, some people really look good when they're being trendy and trying, but like for me, I feel in my comfort zone is like, I hate to say it, but like supermodel in her downtime. Yeah, yeah, no, celebrity at the airport. That's what I'm always going for.

Celebrity at the airport is like what I, how I, that's like the highest tier for me. I see you as a fashion icon though. Thank you, I feel the same about you. You avoided eye contact as you say that. I don't know if I believe you. Because I wanted to get back to animals. You're like, of course I feel the same.

I'm not sure. You are so good too. No, I just think of my dog as such this innocent little being and I never want to think of her like having any any human struggles. I don't want her to- How about your daughter?

She's gonna be like, can you buy me? I don't know. I also- What age will you do fake nails for her? Never, I don't know. I see teenagers with fake nails and I had fake nails. Do you have them? Not right now, but I use it.

Yeah, when did you start? Maybe 15, 16. Yeah, when did you start? Like maybe 15, 16. Yeah, I like started 13. Me too. I had acrylic nails. Me too. Acrylic at 13? Yeah.

Yeah. And I was like always like this in photos. And it had an airbrush that said bitch on it. Yeah, like shit like that. Giving the bird in my acrylic nails. There's a picture of me like in front of a Christmas tree with curling iron bangs, fake acrylic nails that are like frosty pink or something, hot pink,

and like a perm being like double finger to the camera. But now- Perms are fully back though. Perms? Yeah, they're doing them really well now too. I wanna do it. You're gonna perm your hair. I know all the young kids are perming their hair.

Really? Because the new way to do it, the way the Koreans do it, it's much healthier. You're gonna perm your hair. I know all the young kids are perming their hair. Because the new way to do it, the way the Koreans do it, it's much healthier. It doesn't fry your hair. For waves or for straight? For both. I was thinking straight. My hair right now is blown out,

but if I don't blow it out, I feel like it's so frizzy. And I'm like, I saw like some, oh yeah, my Pilates instructor, she has a straight perm. Oh. Well, that's like a Brazilian blowout, right? She called it something else. It is the same, right? What do you call it in the Philippines?

Ribon. Ribon. Wait, what do you wanna get? It's the wavy one. Just wavy. Your hair is a little wavy though, right? It's more. It has some.

Some, but I don't know how to style it and I don't wanna curl it every day, so I think I just wanna perm it. Because you have very thick, heavy hair. I'm curious to see the perms online and what they've come to now. Because mine was so bad. What style was it in? I mean, I don't even think you could call it a style.

It was just like, yeah, I'll show you a picture. But it was just like the worst, like not waves. Almost like, I think it looks like spiral because they set your hair in rollers. I like the quinceanera spirals. Yeah, like it just, I mean, not like that, but like it just was so bad. And then I had those bone straight bangs

because I curled them with a curling iron and braces and fake nails. Yeah, I had the fake nails young too. That's crazy. I know, it's gross. My mom had this, my mom and dad tried to infantilize me for as long as possible. So we weren't allowed makeup, we weren't allowed nail,

we weren't even allowed deodorant or a razor. Well, you're lucky that you're naturally gorgeous. I was super hairy and my tits were- You weren't allowed a razor? I wasn't even allowed a training bra. Like my tits were budding. This has turned a corner. This is really dark.

This is like cult vibes. Yes, and then my parents, like my dad was very like, when we were home, I was 10 years old and he was like, you know, they don't need to wear, I could stay in my underwear all day. And I would walk to the fruit stand across the street in my underwear as like a 10 year old. I was like infantilized in that way.

It was weird, Chelsea. And then got fingered by the family doctor. So yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all starting to come together. To paint a picture. Thank you Stella. I forget what this is. You eat bananas, why?

potassium. Just admit it at halftime. It's heart healthy food. If you want, if you're, you know. Yeah, if you're into it. I mean, so you just started doing that because, I mean, it seems pretty extreme for just a casual thing, right?

Well, it's actually because I eat bananas every single day and it's just a food that I cannot live without. So we just started eating bananas on the show. In case you need a snack, in case tensions are high. I just don't know that I need a full banana right now. You don't need a foot long banana? Mm-hmm. And it says, of course, OK, so I just

want to make clear to the listener, I myself have a podcast. It's called Call Chelsea Peretti. I talk about food all the time on it. And one of the episodes that we did, we did a Trader Joe's taste test, me and Adam Scott of like all these foods they have. And every single thing he brought had peanut butter in it.

And this does as well, right? No. Did it say peanut butter or just butter? Butter's coffee. Oh, sorry, I have PTSD. Or should I say PBSD? Peanut butter, suck my I have PTSD. Or should I say PBSD? Peanut butter, suck my dick.

OK. Mini salted pretzels tossed in buttery toffee. Obviously, that's going to be good, I would think. Yeah. OK, knockoff for Arrocher. Oh, that also looks really fucking good. His chair height is insane. Why?

Don't you think? Because if you're, I don't know, if your legs are down, you're like sunken like this. If you sit up in that thing, you're like, I don't know. It's probably like the perfect chair for Bill Burr. It's like this. You're like, hey, hey, hey. We're in the Bill Burr studio today.

Ooh, I love a gummy with a white layer. Italian amaretti cookies. What are these? So these are all the holiday ones? French onion popcorn is really scary. This bag is massive. This is crazy. Wait, this is amazing.

I don't even like French onion soup. You have to try this. I just made actually a popcorn at home that I think you would really like. What? First of all, I popped it in a Dutch oven. Do you know you can do that? I usually, I have like a stove top thing

that I spin like this. Yeah, but you really don't even need to. You just, you do it in the Dutch oven, you just shake it a few times as it's popping. Whoa. And I put lemon olive oil on it and spirulina and nutritional yeast and truffle salt. It was so good. That sounds really good. Is the olive oil like a lemon infused olive oil? and spirulina and nutritional yeast and truffle salt.

It was so good. That sounds really good. Is the olive oil like a lemon infused olive oil? What? I do not like French onion popcorn. You don't like onion flavor? Not that much, no. In fact, on salads, I get onions off it.

I'm a garlic girly. I thought that to TikTok. I thought all garlic girlies are also inherently onion girlies. They're not separate. I disagree. I'm a garlic girly. I thought to TikTok. I thought all garlic girlies are also inherently onion girlies. They're not separate. I disagree. I'm a garlic girly. I'm not an onion girly.

To me, onion smells like B.O. It tastes like it too. Yeah. So. Oh, this is good. No. It's actually not good. Come to my podcast called Chelsea Peretti

and you can learn more of my food opinions. You don't saute when you're sauteing garlic, you don't add onion in as well? Sometimes, but onion has a more sweet flavor and again, smells like B.O. I think it's good cooked. I don't like it raw in salads and sometimes I like it raw on a burger.

I like it raw with my pelvic floor therapist. Oh yeah, now she's playing ball. I like it raw on like a burger. I like it raw with my pelvic floor therapist. Oh yeah, now she's playing ball. You had me feeling like a perv before and you hung me out to dry and now you're back for more. Little sloppy seconds. You're not even getting gassy with onions. Oh shit.

Can I tell you the honest truth to that? I have no idea what makes me gassy and what doesn't constantly gassy Yeah, like it's just I never yeah When you're sure anticipated yeah, what? She gets cuz she doesn't shit for weeks. Mm-hmm. I know yeah, I have a lot of friends like that What do they do? I go try psyllium. Psyllium husk. Do you do that? Like psyllium, it's like a choking hazard.

No, it's not. You just have to drink tons of water with it. You're gonna choke. So my friend who works in the field, he's a butt doctor. The constipation field? Yeah. He was like once a week, drink psyllium. But the thing is, you have to drink tons of liquid with it

or it has the opposite effect and it's constipating. But if you mix it with some juice and you drink it, like once a week, that's supposed to kind of help you overall. Do you not struggle with this? I don't do it though. Oh, so you do. You know why?

Why? Too much work. I can't maintain consistency with anything. Do you, does that mean that you don't like have like a regular supplement routine either? No, I do. I would think that that would just integrate in smoothly with your supplement routine. Not the psyllium. Psyllium is like a real task.

Well, it's like the thing is I can't mix it with water and I don't drink fruit juice. So when I was having it and I was trying to be good about it, I would have orange juice and it would go bad because I only drink it for that purpose once a week. How is your, how are your BMs? I don't know. How are yours lately? They're unknowable. Mine, I think are feeling pretty consistent actually.

And I, you know what I think it is? I have a grand announcement. Okay. I, for the first time in my life wake up at the exact same time every day because I have a grand announcement. Okay. I, for the first time in my life, wake up at the exact same time every day because I have a baby and I wake up with her. And I think that has made my BMs much more regular. And also probiotics.

I've started taking those again too. Pretty much any ailment that you Google, probiotics could help. So I've just been like, let me start. But then also probiotics, people say are like fake news. Like they're- That's what Dr. Teddy says, my GI doctor. Well, that's a professional name.

And we know you have good judgment in doctors. Whatever Dr. Teddy says goes. Dr. Teddy cold scoped me? Cause I was like, do I need another colonoscopy? He was like, no, let's have a look at it now. And I was like, what do you mean? He was like, let's just look at it with a scope and a camera.

So he cold scoped me right there. What the hell is a cold sculpt? Oh, you mean cold sculpt? Sculpt. Sculpt. No, like an actual sculpt. Didn't know. That's what I meant to do. He's up your ass, is that what we're saying?

Yes. And he's like, you know, while I'm here. I had no, I mean, when I made the appointment. You like improvisational doctors. Yes. They're like, you know what, while we're up here, let's, what? Well, that is the best.

It's so boring when they're like, you need another appointment for that. Like, let's do it now. You're like, hey, why have boundaries? Let's go. That's exactly what he did. And he was like, and we went up with a camera. I was on my now. You're like, hey, why have boundaries? Let's go. That's exactly what he did. And he was like, and he, we went up with a camera. I was on my side and we, he was like,

look how diseased your lower colon is. I thought you had to be out cold to get a colonoscopy. I was, and I certainly enjoyed that. The twilight they give you is the best five seconds of your life. It's probaphyll. I mean, and especially that I don't drink anymore or anything, I was like, I'll get one next week.

Bring me back. Did they tell you whether or not you're, did they grade your prep? Cause you know, sometimes they're like, yeah, you didn't prep very well. Well, hey, I have a hot tip for all the elderly listeners. You can, it's more expensive, but you can get a pill versus the liquid that you have to drink.

No way. Shit, I did the liquid. Is that new? No, I just think no one says this. And that you have to drink. No way. Yes. Shit, I did the liquid and then I suffered. Is that new? No, I just think no one says this. And so you can get it. I think it's like a hundred dollars or something. And you still have to drink tons of water

and you have to take a lot of these pills, but you don't have to taste. Like for me, I'm so taste oriented. I don't want to taste that liquid all day long or whatever. So I did that. I was perfectly cleared out. Before, at my appointment beforehand, my doctor was like,

so don't eat any kale salads because kale really sticks to your insides. And I go, do you still eat kale salad? And she was like, yes, I do. And I was like, that's so disgusting. If you saw kale on Insides of Poland, and then you go order a kale salad. That would never bother me. I don't, people are so disgusting. If you saw kale inside some colon, and then you go order a kale salad. That would never bother me.

People are so sensitive. We were eating dinner and Ace took a giant dookie, and then I just changed her right there. It was at our house, and Dave was like, I'm in the middle of eating. I'm like, it's fine. He's like, I'm eating chili though. I'm like, grow up.

What? Whose side? I don't think anyone's on your side here. I'm gonna guess that no one wants to eat chili with an open diaper next to them. I was fine with it. If she had the baby, like, before solid foods poop, I would be okay with it.

It's all the same. Yes, that feels like the kind of thing you would see on TikTok is someone making chili in a baby diaper and then sprinkling cheese on top. And you're like, why am I spending my time on this? You know? That was like the most profound thing anyone's ever said. Not at all. For me, it landed in a really interesting space.

We have probiotics to scam. I wanna go back to that. No, I don't think so. I don't think so. Think about like kimchi and all these probiotic foods. Like they've been around forever and they're- Okay, yes. But the people who say that they're a scam

say that the foods are not a scam, but that the pills are a scam, which I don't want them to be a scam. I take them. I pay my good hard earned money out of pocket. I want them to be real. As the constipation queen, Jules, our constipation insider, what has worked the best?

Matcha. Really? That's what I do every morning. I drink matcha or coffee. But that's just the other caffeine is gonna be like that. And then I just shit, but sometimes. But sometimes, like I think I. You're a woman of few words, but when you speak it, you really make it count.

But sometimes when I, I think I overdo it and then I think my body gets used to it and then I don't poo for like five days. When I was pregnant, I ate a lot of pears and peas. Pears and peas. I had an aversion to salad, which has sort of stuck with me, where now I kind of prefer cooked vegetables. My acupuncturist is very anti-salads.

Yeah, it's interesting, right? He says that they're very hard to digest, they're not good for you, and in Chinese medicine, mm-mm, mm-mm. That's true, it's like... He says from my Bells Palsy, no salads. I thought leafy greens, that's like where it's all at. Yeah, I don't know, I do agree with him

in that my body doesn't feel great after salads. I'm very just like tight and gassy and just like overall irritated. You should see Esther's doctor. You're tight. You're tight. You're tight. Do you use a 405 South?

There's, it feels nothing. 405 South, look at that even mean. 10 lanes, 15 lanes. Lots of coming and going. You expect traffic. What fires? Do you think the probiotics are good? Do you have?

I do. You do? I do, but I mean, I- Do you think there are levels to the game? I mean, I just think that I've seen enough, listen, I've done enough Google searches for different maladies. I've clocked in a lot of time, okay Esther?

And it always pops up as something, and I don't know, I just think like, I'm very wary of sites that are super hippie dippy, and if I see medical advice on one of those sites, I'm like, okay, grain of salt. But I think once there's trial-based evidence. I love a clinical trial. Yeah, clinical trials.

Let's look it up. Clinical trials for probiotics? Yeah. I think there is. But Dr. Teddy said, take turmeric as a medicine. Okay, I fucking thought that I should get turmeric. Then I get turmeric, then I Google it, and it's like, this has lead and it's not good for you, and you should get turmeric then I get turmeric then I Google it and it's like this has lead and it's not

Good for you, and you can get turmeric poisoning like I'm so confused about All vitamins and I'm scared, you know, it's a gut health is now related to everything Yeah, it's like depression Alzheimer's this that the other so I'm just like Let me throw anything at it that I can because I'm certainly not eating healthy. You know? Alzheimer's is now considered what type three diabetes, right? Is it? Yeah, I think so.

Because they're connecting it to the gut health and just overall. Listen, all signs really point to eating healthy. But you, you're so, it's so crazy to me that you're saying you don't eat healthy because I feel like you, I think of you as like cooking kale-based pastas and like just like making these elaborate California cuisines.

Thank you. Yeah. I remember that one year where all you ate was bulldog noodles. I had bulldog noodles every day, every night and the pasta. Do you see the, do you know what bulldog noodles are? No, what is that? Basically they're more evolved top ramen, but it's like so much better. pasta. Do you see the, do you know what bulldog noodles are? No, what is that? Basically, they're more evolved top ramen, but it's like so much better. From Korea, and it's so good.

The parmesan something. And they have a carbonara one? Carbonara. Oh, it's so good. But then I got so big and my face was so puffy. And then I was just always constipated and I like my mental health back then was so bad. But I loved it, but then I had to stop. There was some point where like literally every day I came home and she was only eating bull duck. Like that's not sustainable. I did that in college though too.

Like there's this restaurant in the Midwest called Noodles and Company. And I went there every single day for their buttered noodles. It was so good. That's, that sounds good. Wait, I think I lied when I said soup plantation was coming back. Oh, I think you did too.

I think it's a soup and fresh or some type of like off shoot of soup plantation. I never had had that cause it was like California only. Oh really? Yeah, we didn't have that. I think of that as like revolving around all the 90s LA crimes.

Suit plantation is mentioned in the O.J. Simpson Ryan Murphy show. Wait, so in high school, the boy that I had a crush on robbed a suit plantation. That is so insane. That is so hot. And it was a full blown heist. That's hot.

Isn't it? I didn't, because he didn't end up graduating because of this. I think he got arrested. Because he got so rich, I didn't, cause he didn't end up graduating because of this. I think he got like arrested. Cause he got so rich, he didn't need school. But he, there was another. He had soup, he had so much soup. There was an insider, another friend of theirs.

He robbed them for soup, not money. That was his main downfall. Mistake. But there was an insider, she was working in soup plantation and they like planned this whole heist and they all got caught and they like planned this whole heist and they all got caught and they all ended up, they didn't graduate. I remember this specifically.

We should make a Ryan Murphy series about that story. Oh yeah, anything really. Just any story. Not any story, a heist? Are you for soup? No, it's good, call them. We should just have all our meals at Panera. I don't think I've ever been to Panera.

It's, I guess, it's like a Midwest thing and it has gone downhill extensively and I want them to know that I feel that way. What was your go-to there? Like basically they had this thing called the You Pick 2 and so you could pick a half a sandwich and a salad or a soup what was actually a half salad.

So then you just like combine any of those. And I would get the cream of chicken with wild rice soup. And what? I hate soup famously. But you must be a real soup lover. Cause we've talked about soup for half this podcast. I don't, I'm not a- Are you fully anti soup for all kinds of soup?

Aside from I do like some Korean soups. Like? I can't say it, but the one that's cold where you slice the noodles, you cut the noodles with scissors. It's like nam-young. Nam-young. Yeah. Nam-young. But so basically I love that. I do like some gazpacho's when they're good.

So you love soups? No, I only love like two soups, but as a whole, I'm not gonna order soup. If I have an option of anything with any texture differentiation versus a bowl of slop, I'm gonna choose the texture. Okay, maybe you didn't hear what I said. I said cream of chicken with wild rice.

Yeah, that sounds disgusting. And I heard slop, slop, grit. What I heard was three, in the name alone, three different textures. Hold on. Chicken is chewy. Rice is chewy. And the cream is like a thickener.

So it's like a thick... When is texture just down to something that's chewed? Crispy. I told you I'm fat. I like crispy. I like crispy. I like crunchy. But to insinuate that rice and chicken are the same texture is like...

They do have both a sort of glutinous, I mean chicken. Wait, I wanna chime in on this. I'm trying to stand my ground on this point. Chicken would be rice-like in texture, yeah. I stand by it. And then, picture this, little crunchy bits of vegetables in there too.

Mystery vegetables. I mean, that soup in particular sounds pretty bad to me. I thought you were gonna say pretty good. No, no, a creamy, ricey, chickeny soup, no. Well, what if it's in a bread bowl that will please you as a fat person? Extra fucking, yeah, it should appeal to me, chickeny soup, no. Well, what if it's in a bread bowl that will please you as a fat person? Extra fucking, yeah, it should appeal to me, but sadly it doesn't.

I don't like rice in a bread bowl. That somehow is sacrilegious to me. Oh, stop it! A chowder, a chowder short. That's double carb. Yeah, but like a rice, okay. Specks of rice. Hey, do you ever sprinkle rice on like a pasta dish?

That'd be good. That would be really good too. You should try that. It's specks of rice. Okay, I have something to say. Hey, after you ever sprinkle rice on like a pasta dish, that'd be good. That would be really good too. You should try that. Wait, I mean, last week I said that I shove spaghetti into bread. So I- Yeah, you sick Filipino fuck. It's so good.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Race, race comes into it. Yeah, you have to try it. You have to try it. Cold Filipino spaghetti inside pandasal is actually very good. It's the best. So yes, I apologize for judging you that harshly

But I will say I know what you mean because since getting bells palsy and I can't use my mouth Correctly, I don't like mixed media either. I don't like different textures It's got to be one slop one goop or give me nothing because that's the opposite of what I said No, I do not like slop. You just said you want slop. She wants- You're pro slop, I'm anti-slop. I'm anti-mixed media. And that means you're pro slop. Just to recap. I'll say you're anti-slop.

You like a slurry or a sludge that you can pour down your disabled mouth. Where as I like good food. What's interesting though is the two soups that you do like are cold. It is interesting. It is interesting. And I also took, was, had been taking note of that.

Yeah, that's weird, right? Yeah. And you also use the word love. You didn't just say, I tolerate these two soups. You said you love them. And what do you make of that? I make it, that's weird for someone who previously said that they famously hate soup.

But you love two soups. Most people like all soups. They don't love some. And what do you make of that? I make it that's weird for someone who previously said that they famously hate soup. I do though. But you love two soups. Most people like all soups. They don't love some. No, a lot of you all seem to love soup. Like across the board. Like do you love a butternut squash soup? You probably do with your sick ass.

Like I'll have that. First of all, it's too sweet. That's actually the be all. That's the first and second point. Too sweet. It sounds to me like you're just a sad, you're on a sad journey of craving the perfect butternut squash soup.

Here's what's sad. Here's what's sad. Scoop, scoop. Someone's spooning little liquids into their mouth. It's like, yeah, if you have dentures and you've taken them out and you need a quick bite, go for it. Otherwise, you have no excuse. What about split pea soup?

Ugh, Esther, that's like the last one you should bring up. That should be like in your back, back burner for arguments for soup. I could name like 15 other soups you should name first. Like French onion, everyone loves French onion. I don't like it. But you know, that would be one that people listening would at least agree with you.

P, you probably lost 90% of your audience. What if you're, okay. What if it's just like a sick day chicken noodle soup? I'm not into chicken noodle soup. I don't like it. Look. I don't like it. She doesn't like it either.

Well, I don't like it either. I was just trying to like- It's one of the worst American foods. I think so. That's a very basic, yeah. I agree. Thank you. I don't think you. Matzo ball soup. I do think. That's a very basic, yeah. I agree. Matsubal soup.

I do think Matsubal soup is better than chicken noodles. Yeah, Matsubal, any type of bisque I think is pretty good. And also there's a little something fun to do. You're cutting little bites off that Matsubal. All right, we've got a solid in play, okay? We've got a little something to do here. We're not just. Also, I have to say, I had a formative experience at a Hoffbrow as a kid where me and my dad

and my brother were at this Hoffbrow and we saw this guy eating soup. He sneezed into it and then continued to spoon it into his mouth. So maybe that has something to do with my aversion. Now we're getting somewhere. Okay. Wait, so if you sneeze into a food, you...

He was like put it... And then he just... Oh my. Like in... It was just so gross. I feel like I've done that for sure. Wait, what about lima bean soup? Ew, Esther, are you sick?

Are you mentally sick? You know what, I know one that you would like. What? Picture a dairy-free broccoli pureed soup. I bet you'd like that. It's interesting that you say that. I would like that if it was good. Is it?

Here's the, actually, I like a good cauliflower soup, but most of the time they're not good. I agree. Here's a test. We'll see if soups are good definitively. What's your go-to soup in LA? I, I know. What's your go-to soup?

I know what you're- GTS, let's go. What is it? It's hard to find good soup. What? In LA? But it would seem it would be the easiest thing to find. This is one of the best foods the ice anything with

Tom yum, so Thai and this is a cheat. This is a cheat. I can't comment as a white person. That's not true Yes, you can no I I do think those are I think non white people soups are far superior. I agree I My good soups are in the Midwest Okay, let me hear about a Midwest soup because we've already bombed on lima bean. What'd you say? Lima bean soup? Did you really say that or did I imagine that? I love lima bean soup. It's one of my favorite soups.

I didn't even know that was a thing. That's crazy. Is that like a canned lima bean? No, no, no. You get it at like a Jewish deli, but most of them have closed down. Jewish people eat lima bean soup? Yeah.

Never heard of it. What about like sweet and sour cabbage soup? Have you ever had that? No, now we're talking about, that might be what's making you gassy. Are you eating sweet and sour cabbage soup daily? Not daily, but like that, sweet and sour cabbage and lime and bean

are like Jewish deli soups, I would say. Really? I've never heard of either. You're Jewish. Are you? You lived in New York. I'm, well, I'm half. But the wrong half. Well to super orthodox people would say that sure but I know

you're not that. I am. You're super orthodox. Newly, newly. That's why I'm in pants. Anyway but yeah I don't know if you've really nothing and okay you you have a good point because those soups have flavor and texture. So much flavor and texture. Tom yum. So all the Asian soups are a go for me. She's like teacher's pet right now.

She's recapping. I can give you all the tom yums, guys. But it's true. And then it's like, I don't know, I'm trying to. Yeah, the best iteration of a Caucasian soup is probably. Caucasian soup. That's your format. It's probably, I think, a cauliflower.

Jewish soups, I've never heard of those. I mean, it'd be interesting to poll your audience. Yeah. But. Lime and bean fans. Lime and bean soup fans. Comment. Hit up the soosh.

Wait, do you have a soup that you like? I'm with Chelsea, I hate soup. She hates soups. She's upset when we have soup anyway. And yes, we always have soup right now for dinner because of her, so I try to just make. Oh my God, she's coming. She's coming with a bus.

We have soupy things. Look, this is what I thrive on, driving a wedge between two people. Between families? Yeah. But I mean, yeah, it's like, when are you ever like, mm, dinner time, let me drink a bowl of liquid. You know what I mean?

But I think just in general, I like soupy dishes and stews. I don't like, like, as opposed to something grilled, I'm always gonna take a stew. Wow, fascinating opposite. Total opposite. Maybe that's why you got males balls in your face. Just trying to keep it light, guys.

Just trying to keep it light. My acupuncturist said in Chinese medicine, it's one of two things. Either there was a cold draft that hit your face. I knew it. I'm like, they're always talking about hot damn Yeah, I'm like, okay. I got to get out of here It's a cold draft or you're very you're severely anemic or like blood depleted. Have you tested all your blood?

Yeah, I'm so I'm very anemic really do you do iron transfusions? I started taking fluoridics because of Esther, but I don't take the iron trans did it help Um, I don't know you haven't retested your iron. I haven't because I don't take the iron trans-vigilance. Did it help? I don't know. You haven't retested your iron? I haven't retested it. Because I have kind of low iron. I got my iron back up. How? I actually went off the Floridics

because I was not consistent. Because it's toxic. No, I was. I'm drinking lead. I wanted to, but it wasn't consistent with it because it's a drink, which contradicts something I said earlier in this podcast, but which is accusing you of not being able

to keep up with psyllium husk being weird. But I take something called EZ iron, just if you Google that, you'll find it. And it's like a non-constipating iron. And that got my iron levels up. Like truly, like there's proof and everything. I have receipts. Yeah, because they were suggesting IV infusion.

I think that's good. There may be better people who have sensitive GI. Yeah, that makes sense because then it's not causing you constipation. It's straight into your blood. I got that in the hospital, too. After my gave birth, I got the iron IV. Oh, you did? Yeah. Yeah, it still wasn't.

I missed your whole birth story because I was like texting you trying to get it, but you're like saving it for an iPod. You're saving it for a podcast. Exclusive. Oh yeah, I did do it. I was like, how'd your birth go? You're like, hold please. I'm going to do a special ep, a very special ep. I still don't know how your birth went. It was like, it was really good and also not really good. Like that's, I feel like the more removed I am from of it. Like.

The best of times, the worst of times. Truly. Like, I was really happy to be drugged up and I was really, really just hated being pregnant so much that once she was out of me, I was like, you know, you know the honest truth, now that I look back on it, I was so scared after having a miscarriage and just of everything

you read online of like not delivering a baby that was alive. Like I really live with that fear. And I never once even could let myself picture what it would be like to have the baby be born. And so as soon as she was out of me and alive, I was like euphoric because I got to that point, but then I was also ignoring other things

that maybe didn't go great. So that's sort of like, yeah. We can offline though about it, I'll tell you everything. Obviously it would be so much fun to talk about. Yeah. I do love, my favorite part about your entire birth story is that you got an epidural at 0.5 centimeters. Like to me that's historic.

It was. They had to like call several specialists to make sure it was okay. Yeah. You know what? Speaking of soup, when I was about to have my child, they were like, you can't have any food. Yeah. And so I thought I was genius and I ordered

a postmated bone broth to the hospital. And I'm like, it's not food. And then I fucking yacked so hard. Like I wound up having to get a C-section and I was laying on my back under the anesthesia and I had to throw up. And they're like, I'm like, the urgency of needing to throw up,

I was like, I am going to throw up. Like, imagine laying on your back, you can barely move. You're like, I'm gonna throw up, I'm gonna throw up. And the nurse is like, that's fine. Like, it felt like she was like, that's okay. Turn your head to the right. And then I don't know why, I feel like I hallucinated this, but she held a tiny, like it looked like a condom.

And she goes, throw up into this while you're laying down with your head turned sideways. It was like a prank. What if she was also a pervert? But yeah, I don't, I still to this day don't, and they made me drink like this weird yellow liquid, which I still don't know what it was. What do you mean?

Someone's piss? Anyway, pretty gross. Wait, we didn't, what is, none of these are good? The French onion popcorn is delicious. Oh, that's the only one we tried. Did you try the pretzels? No. I didn't like the pretzels.

What a good ending to the podcast. I bet they're good. They're good. You didn't like them? Too sweet, Jules? It's too sweet. Yeah, I think TJ's needs a new person in their flavor lab. What can I tell ya?

You're not totally wrong. Food isn't easy. It's not. It's one of the most perilous journeys you can take. I still low key have this desire for you to mentor me as a chef. I wonder if one day that can manifest that. Well, I told you about my popcorn.

That's true. That sounds really good. You can duplicate that. It's really good. Although I'm really suspicious of the olive oil being lemon infused. Why is that? It just seems weird.

I love lemon. You can just do it with regular. Yeah, it just doesn't fit the bill for me. The nutritional yeast. It's so good. It was so good. I love lemon. So lemony, salty, truffly popcorn.

It was really good. Yeah. And then the nutritional yeast adds that cheesy flavor. Right. That's what's throwing me off, I guess. I guess it does sound sort of weird, but it's really good. Yeah. I mean, at least it's not like a what's throwing me off. I know I guess it does sound sort of weird, but it's really good Yeah, I mean at least it's not like a creamy chicken rice

like You are gravy. We were easily eating gravy Is gravy bad? Do you like Alfredo sauce? Oh, that's so rude, isn't it? That is like the classic do you love it though? Just be truthful just living your truth. Do you love it though? Just be truthful. Just live in your truth. Do you love Alfredo? I don't, but my sister does and it's embarrassing for me. It's triggering for me because of how much my sister likes it.

I have one more thing to say before you part ways. Is it about Alfredo sauce? No, I have once thought at the cafeteria at UNLV, because I got a full ride to UNLV, so I had have once thought at the cafeteria at UNLV because I got a full ride to UNLV. So I had like, I'll rain at the cafeteria. I forgot you went there.

I didn't know that there was biscuit gravy and I ate it as a soup for a whole semester. I rest my case. You literally couldn't distinguish between that and soup. I could not. I think that's a solid argument for. You're trying to tell me. Irrelic argument for. You're trying to tell me. Eradicating soup.

You're trying to tell me that you don't love gravy? 100% don't love gravy. What? I don't like something that you could call glop. You come on the show talking and all this game, like I'm a fat person and you don't love gravy? Yeah. I don't know.

I don't think you know who you are. Well, listen, I think that sometimes fat people are frustrating. You know, it's like, you're like, hey, let's split a cheesecake. And they're like, I don't like cheesecake. And you're like, what? You of all people don't like cheesecake.

Guys, we love you. This is all comedy. Listen, the only reason I think fat needs to be reused. You know, like when body positivity came about and people were like, I am fat and I'm taking the word back. Well, now that everyone's on Ozempic, I think I should be allowed to call myself fat. I am totally in support of that.

I'm buying in for you. I'm surrounded. Like literally, I'm the last man standing. Everybody I know is on Ozempic. And I'm like, I'll be taking care of the normalcy department. So I'm gonna get through it by tooth and nail, however I can.

I respect you for that. I subscribe. You guys, thank you to Chelsea for coming back to celebrate our 200th episode. And I would love to hear what people think about soup. Whose side are you on? Yeah. And we'll see you next week with a brand new episode.

And also watch Chelsea's movie on Roku. Yeah you don't have to get the Roku. I wish I had made that clear in the past. You don't have to get that machinery. It's free. You can just watch it online. Yeah Roku is free. It's called first time female director. My podcast again is called Chelsea Peretti. It's so good. Just when independent and would love you to check it out. You will hear a lot more about soup. And that is guaranteed. OK, well, interesting.

I wonder what you'll say. We'll see you guys next week with a brand new episode..