Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Rick Glassman Makes Us Sweat

Episode Date: April 18, 2023

Thank you to our Sponsors: Julie - Go to https://juliecare.co to learn more or find Julie at your nearest CVS, Target, or Walmart today.Athletic Greens - Go to https://athleticgreens.com/tuesday to g...et a free 1-year supply of Vitamin D & 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. BetterHelp - Visit our sponsor http://betterhelp.com/trashtuesday today to get 10% off your first month.Rocket Money - Cancel unwanted subscriptions and manage your expenses the easy way by going to https://rocketmoney.com/trashtuesday More Rick Glassman:Take Your Shoes Off Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@rickglassmanI AM PHENOMENAL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pEZCTUymiUwInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/rickglassman/Twitter: https://twitter.com/RickGlassmanWebsite: https://www.rickglassman.com/ Subscribe! https://bit.ly/HitOurButtonsOfficial Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/2QDAi8XTrash Tuesday Podcast iTunes Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TrashTuesdayPodTrash Tuesday Podcast Spotify Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TTPodAudioTrash Tuesday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday 0:00 Rick Glassman Introduces the Show3:58 Are Beauty Standards More Objective or Subjective?13:49 90s Movies and 90s Babes23:26 Rick Glassman’s TMJ Guy & We’re All Taking Magnesium 28:40 Staying Single For a While Before a New Relationship33:31 Rick Glassman Used to Pretend to Be a Girl in Chat Rooms44:05 A Toothbrush Not for Brushing47:31 Big Muscles on Men & Rick Glassman’s Agility 51:58 Accepting Validation & Not Caring What People Think of You1:07:13 Honesty Without Being Brutally Honest1:14:48 Trying Too Hard to Be a Chivalrous Person1:20:46 We Have Missed You Rick Glassman Listen to our other Podcasts: TigerBelly - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/tigerbelly/id1041201977 My Pleasure - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/my-pleasure/id1494518220 AnnieWood - https://www.youtube.com/annielederman Follow Us: Khalyla Kuhn - https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk Annie Lederman - https://www.instagram.com/annielederman Esther Povitsky - https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster Produced by: 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: Pete Forthun & Carlos Herrera

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one. Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel.
Starting point is 00:00:33 George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls. And the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at $15 a month. And all plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. That is such a steal. To get this new customer
Starting point is 00:00:58 offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just $15 a month, go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. That's mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month at mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three-month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes. On unlimited plan, additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. gigabytes on unlimited plan additional taxes fees and restrictions apply statement mobile for details welcome back to another episode of trash tuesday with special guest rick glassman i am rick glassman here with esther pavitsky who doesn't have a side and kalilah who is left-sided correct and this is my good side now okay go ahead rick what is it about the other side that scares you so much because we switched we had to start oh you had to let everybody know that we had to switch oh we could edit that out it's just but you actually were so avoidant you did not want to switch i said i think kalilah likes that side and you didn't want to let her have that even though
Starting point is 00:01:56 no no what i said was let's have her say that on the podcast why so because i want to have that conversation what's the good side i believe it it. I believe it exists, but I never see it. It's nice to live with symmetry, you asshole. Ask Esther. She's not symmetrical, but both sides are bad. Look, Rick.
Starting point is 00:02:12 Yes. My right side. I mean, you just said it. People can be objectively ugly, right? And it's all about symmetry. And I am the most asymmetric person. I have one eye smaller than the other. I have that too.
Starting point is 00:02:24 We know. It's not as obvious as yours i think and um just my everything is a little bit stranger on the right side i don't think that beauty is objective i'm saying there are some things that aren't as subjective but like there are some people that you take a you take a sample of 100 guys and 100 girls and then you take a sample of 200 random people and they, and then you take a sample of 200 random people, and they say pretty or not pretty. There's going to be some that more people...
Starting point is 00:02:50 Yeah, but that's based on... Sorry, are you going to be here the whole podcast? It's very shrill. Can we do something about Esther? Esther? Esther, can we turn the shrill down? Maybe bring her parents so something could be funny. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:03:06 Oh my God, Julie. How exciting. You guys, Julie is an FDA approved morning after pill that helps stop pregnancy before it starts. Go to juliecare.co to learn more or find Julie at your nearest CVS, Target, or Walmart today. That's juliecare.co to learn more. Our next partner is Athletic Greens and we take
Starting point is 00:03:27 AG1 a lot over here. I gave AG1 a try because I wanted better gut health. I wanted to get my greens in without having to think about it and do guessing games and play with bunches of pills. And if you're looking for an easier way to take supplements, Athletic Greens is giving you a free one-year supply of vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday. That's athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday. Check it out.
Starting point is 00:03:55 This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday. You guys stop throwing your money away, cancel unwanted subscriptions and manage your expenses the easy way. Go to rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday. That's rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday. He made the same joke last night. Esther was doing 20 minutes and she goes, I'm not going to do the whole 20. And he said, well, of course not without her parents here. That was fun seeing you last night doing that show. I got to say, I haven't seen you in a while
Starting point is 00:04:36 and it works when you walk up with the music and the little dancing that we did and everything. It works. I'm so funny. Did you bring her up? No. We just were in the back of Soho House, and we were in a big group of crowded, cool people, and I saw Rick across the room for the first time in a long time. I'll do my impression of Esther when she saw me. And I walked up to him. He popped up. And when I'm near Rick, my body just sort of goes with it.
Starting point is 00:05:09 Also, please let him know it popped up on beat. Oh, yes. On beat. It was on the 4th. Why don't you say what happened? Please, please. And then he swirled me around and dipped me. And all the cool, hot people were impressed.
Starting point is 00:05:22 And they all went like this. Do you want to change shirts? I love this shirt. It's vintage diesel. Pretend you're going down a roller coaster and let everybody see what I just saw. That's body shaming. My arms?
Starting point is 00:05:38 No, your armpits are wet. Oh, so are mine. Your armpits never sweat, Rick? They sweat, yeah, but we justed. But who are mine? They are mine. Your armpits never sweat, Rick? Wait. They sweat. Yeah, but we just started. That never happens. Mine are constantly sweating, dripping sweat. If you say treadmill, she starts to perspire.
Starting point is 00:05:53 I just need to think one thought and my armpits are wet, even if it's a positive thought. It's called hyperhidrosis. Oh, I'm sorry. I relate. Thank you, mother. Now, listen, Rick. So people are ugly, is what you're saying. I'm saying I don't think beauty is as...
Starting point is 00:06:09 And I say the same thing about comedy. I don't think that comedy and beauty are as subjective as people say. So you're saying since the dawn of time, there's been a beauty standard. Someone can be born and just know inherently what is good looking what is not good looking because wouldn't you argue that i already said no so your point is go ahead but so tell us if 200 people are in a room and we do uh a survey of who's good looking and who's not good looking um now it's very it's based on the time and culturally as well. Like if you go like, we're here in America in 20, what is it? 23?
Starting point is 00:06:49 23. 2023. What a flex. Wow, you're so cool. You don't even know the year. Whatever. I don't think about that kind of stuff. Cool guy.
Starting point is 00:06:59 Cool guys here. Yeah. And what day is it, by the way? Oh, God. Yeah, I just think that some people like for example I bet you will like a lot of people will comment I've seen on this podcast when you guess on mine Esther's actually not that ugly because they got to know her really they got to know her a little bit and she's funny when funny people are around so like things change and the meter moves a little bit but but typically like nobody's gonna ask esther to to campaign for something if it weren't for her funny parents does that make sense she's not gonna be maybelline no one would say maybe it's maybelline
Starting point is 00:07:36 they know it's maybelline we don't know that well we'll see look you're trying to say you're trying to say that beauty, you just said before we started rolling that beauty is. There are some people. I forgot. Well, there are some people, and I'll go ahead and say it. We're not these people that are like, they're like, whoa. No, you're very ugly too. That's why we see each other in each other. I don't see that. I need me and you literally or metaphorically. No, no, no, very ugly too. That's why we see each other in each other. I don't see that, me and you, literally or metaphorically.
Starting point is 00:08:08 No, no, no, but you do. No, you're an ugly person. I'm an average guy. When I look in the mirror, I see Rick Glassman. We know. Cut to a clip of me just behind you. Wait a second. I'm not understanding your point because you're kind of arguing your own point in front of me just behind you wait a second i'm not understanding your point because you're kind
Starting point is 00:08:27 of arguing your own point in front of me so you're saying yeah i know he's totally switchy swatchy so there is there is a beauty standard but again that beauty standard varies in time and place? Yes. Okay. But when somebody- But either of those beauty standards are still based on previous references of beauty and what the culture decides, right? One of the variables is very, very influenced by social standards and what is being marketed and what people are doing and what trends. Absolutely. But if you look at any period of time, for example, there are people who are not- What's his name?
Starting point is 00:09:05 Adam Driver, I think is such a good looking guy, but he's like got an interesting non symmetrical. He's got big care. And he has hips. And I'm not a hips girl. You think you're Adam Driver, huh? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:19 Wait a second. Yeah. Adam Driver's good looking just because his nose is big and he's very jewish looking and his posture isn't the best talking about me now because i think like i grew up around um people well i grew up in a culture that revered sumo wrestlers say for instance i grew up in asia and these guys were were playboys they would date like really hot models and they were what like 400 500 pound dudes and i've always had a thing for fat asian dudes we know and so you know everyone at home goes, we know. But like objectively, and this is, I mean, not objectively, subjectively, I, this is
Starting point is 00:10:10 going to sound pretty harsh, but I basically don't look at white guys twice. Like it's very hard for me to find a white person, like a white guy, like just to get my loins going in that direction. But if you put a, you know, a portly Asian guy in front of me, my loins going in that direction but if you put a you know a portly asian guy in front of me my loins will get going but then over here in america they it kind of took a while for asian men to be viewed that way and it's still not you know the the sumo wrestler look is still not a thing here that's such a superpower to not be attracted to white men i know like you can just like destroy their lives they don't care i mean i've dated them it's just my you know my preferences are a little bit shaped they're shaped differently because i
Starting point is 00:10:54 grew up in a different continent yeah i mean so asian guys are number one for me don't you feel like what she just said completely blew your argument out of the water. Absolutely. I stand corrected. That's it? It was that easy? No, that's what I'm saying. It's not objective. I'm saying it's just not completely subjective. For example, people like pizza.
Starting point is 00:11:19 A lot of people say pizza's delicious. Some people don't like pizza. Some people don't like white pizzas. However... I love white pizza, though. I hate white pizza. If people don't like white pizzas. However. I love white pizza though. I hate white pizza. If it's bread, you'll eat it. People like pizza. So what I'm saying is there is a deviation to that.
Starting point is 00:11:33 But like if you were like salmon pot pie, I'm sure people will eat that. But that's not classically beautiful. No, it is. If that's what you grew up thinking was classically beautiful, then you will eat that. Yes. Some people like salmon pot pie yeah most people like pizza because that's what most of the people that you know were exposed to that's what i'm saying you are one of the most of the people i know so are the people that i'm
Starting point is 00:11:56 going to meet i'm not here saying beauty needs to be a certain thing i'm just not following this idea that everything is so subjective. Food, comedy, looks. There are kind of like standards of like. Soft guardrails is what you're saying. But there are. No, there's not, Rick. There's literally beauty standards that I think is ruining feminine company. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Yes. I could literally start my own planet and say I'm the standard of beauty and yours will go by. That will never play. Why not? Start your own planet you you almost pooped your pants because he was a little bit late getting here i just think that some people do you ever look at a girl or a guy and be like she's hot he's hot and think that most people would agree no okay i'm wrong i i see what you're saying there are people that i could be like oh oh, he's objectively good looking,
Starting point is 00:12:46 but I'm not attracted maybe to them. But that is based on what you saw growing up. So is your flavor profile on your palate. Exactly. We're all a reflection of the culture around us. Deep, man. Deep. So that means that it could,
Starting point is 00:13:01 if it were any different, it would be different and we wouldn't know agreed okay so but here we are growing up the way we grew up yeah looking at the things eating the things watching the things we have this idea of what we are into at this moment in time and with that it's not as fluid as everyone saying everything. All people are beautiful. But it's all made up. So are the words we're using, but you still understand them. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:29 So we make stuff up. We have pattern recognition as these humans, and we have this shorthand, and we communicate the way we do physically, emotionally, words, music, and we have an idea of what the world is and what we like and as a collective people there are people that are relatively uglier than other people would you disagree um under this under what society has decided upon yes but then if you're going to follow that it's like so are we sticking with that because under that societal ruling like what our culture has follow that it's like so are we sticking with that because under that societal like what our culture has told us it's like only tall blonde women who look like pam anderson are
Starting point is 00:14:13 that's the standard of beauty grew up in the 90s yeah no exactly but that's my point it's like but yes for a while big tits were correct me if i'm wrong all the rage and now we don't need them anymore but the only reason they were that was because pam anderson so it can change absolutely so if it can change it can be anything at any point we don't we don't need big tits anymore nope all you need is a nice ass and a good face and money but then it got replaced with the ass but what happens to the you know what i mean it just it's a bummer it's a bummer for guys used to be coming next yeah and that's and that's that's what's exciting that's what's exciting and that's kind of like what the the younger generations have to offer like kind of like the elected officials what we're voting for
Starting point is 00:14:57 who's who's going to create these new policies who's going to represent us that's why it's important that we have people kind of go in there and be like, oh yeah, like this is good looking and this is funny and this is tasty and things change. Absolutely. Yes.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Very good. But, do you guys think Dumb and Dumber is a funny movie? I don't remember. Yeah. Of course.
Starting point is 00:15:21 What do you mean of course? Well, there's nostalgia tied to it for me because my dad and I watched it. And the movie theater in the Philippines was so packed that people were like sitting on the aisles, like not even on actual seats.
Starting point is 00:15:33 Even in the Philippines, Dumb and Dumber was funny. Hilarious, yes. Would you say you understand that some people might not think it's funny, but objectively, like, that's a funny movie. Yeah, but I i feel like again i don't know if this speaks to your point or our point but um it's not as funny to me today if i were to watch it today with fresh eyes it would be a little bit different wait whoa are you trying to argue that dumb and dumber is objectively? What I'm saying is in the same way that
Starting point is 00:16:06 That's the movie you chose? Yeah, it's not the funniest movie in the world, but it's a very funny, big, broad movie. Okay. And it's just like You don't think there's a ton of smart people right now that will look at that? I don't remember anything about the movie,
Starting point is 00:16:22 but my top of my intelligence guess is that everyone even in this room right now, would look at that movie today and be like, this is stupid and not funny, and it won't make me laugh out loud. Okay, then you're pretty. You're a beautiful girl. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:16:39 Do you think Dumb and Dumber is a good movie? Yeah, I don't think it's funny. I don't think it's as funny as I thought it was back then. Well, what do you think about Pam Anderson now versus Pam Anderson back then? I don't really ever into Pam Anderson. Oh. I used to. I used to be.
Starting point is 00:16:53 I was so into Pam Anderson and Carmen Electra, and I didn't have a printer growing up. I know. I didn't have a computer, Rick. I didn't have a computer until I was 24 years old. Honestly, that might be for the best. I had a computer when I was 10, old honestly I don't know why I'm undressing that might be for the best I had a computer when I was 10
Starting point is 00:17:07 and I did not use it for good what did you use it for? cyber sex in all chat rooms pretending at 10 yes
Starting point is 00:17:14 pretending to be what? pretending to be a woman that looks like Pam Anderson why? did you catfish people then? yeah what would you say? I did chat room stuff
Starting point is 00:17:23 I bet do you think maybe we i feel like i recognize you what kind of dirty things did you say i just would were you trying to get mp3s no i would download pictures of naked women you have my attention and send them to people oh and this is me chat rooms right and say that Now, the women that you downloaded, were they just, were they pretty women or ugly women? No, they were like what the standard of beauty was at the time. That's all I'm saying, man. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:17:54 That's all I'm saying. You thought that these people would be attracted to this type of woman. Because of what I saw on TV and what was told. Everything we're doing, we're all stardust, man. Everything we're doing is based on what we're inspired and our experiences. So what is to stop me from starting a whole new cult
Starting point is 00:18:13 and being like, I'm the hottest thing? You've been trying to do it for a decade. How's it working for you, sweetheart? I think we should... So you've catfished people. I mean, granted, you were really young. I've done it too, and I did it, and I said I was a girl. You said you were a girl?
Starting point is 00:18:28 Yeah. Why? Are we not going to talk about the Pamela Anderson, Carmen Electra printer stuff? Do we go back to that? We can. Okay, let's start there, but let's definitely not gloss over the girl stuff. What could that be? I don't know how old I was.
Starting point is 00:18:42 Probably like 10-ish, And chat rooms are new. Rick, I think you and I hooked up in a chat room. I think you guys must have. Yeah, then it was girl on girl. And that would make sense. Yeah, I would talk and I would pretend I was a girl. Wait, I thought we were going through Carmen Electra printer. Oh, sure.
Starting point is 00:19:07 Yeah, you seemed so desperate to go back to it. So take us there. It's a funny memory. Go for it. I would go. Bored. Write that down. What time are we?
Starting point is 00:19:20 Esther got a laugh. How far in? 16.50. Good. Which is probably the last time Esther would have been hot so I was so ugly
Starting point is 00:19:30 when I was 16 you were not 1650 I'm saying in the year 1650 when like this would what it would be
Starting point is 00:19:39 you look like you look honestly you look like like a renaissance paint like I saw a picture of what George Washington I don't know if we could find it so we could put it up now would look like, honestly, you look like a renaissance paint. Like, I saw a picture of what George Washington, I don't know if we could find it so we could put it up now,
Starting point is 00:19:49 would look like if you were president today. And you look just like that. So I had a thing for Carmen Electra and Jenny McCarthy and Pamela Anderson. Of course. Same, same. Oh, interesting. We all agree? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:01 We were the dumb and dumber of tits back then. Oh, we all agree? Yeah. That's what we were fed. We were the dumb and dumber of tits back then. So, I, and back then, you know, it wasn't as easy to look at pictures and videos and stuff. You had to download them and like wait for it to fill in. Yeah, almost like you were like looking them up and down, but you had to go really slow.
Starting point is 00:20:19 I found them on hard copy. What? Yeah, like on magazines and stuff. We didn't live in the Philippines. I was here already was here already where did you find those magazines i mean like you would just basically anywhere like your friends homes you would tear them you would steal them wherever you could find them steal them yeah i was a thief. If you were a catfish, I was a thief. Were pictures of Pamela Anderson? Anything I could get my little sticky hands on, Rick.
Starting point is 00:20:51 There was a lot of theft in my younger years. Yeah, but okay, printer. Why? I'm feeling a disconnect here. Like these things, these acknowledgements that were not on the same page. I really think it'll help the podcast. these acknowledgements that we're not on the same page. I really think it'll, I really think it'll help the podcast.
Starting point is 00:21:13 You know, what has bothered me in the past is the morning after pill experience. It's a little too clinical. It's a little too boring. It's a little too shameful, which is why I'm really glad that a brand like Julie exists now because it's fun. It's taking the shame away from, you know, a situation that it sometimes is unavoidable. And Julie is an FDA approved morning after pill that helps stop pregnancy before it starts. Julie stops your body from releasing an egg using the same active ingredient as plan B or other morning after pills. Essentially, Julie works by preventing or delaying your ovulation. With no egg, there's no fertilization and therefore no pregnancy, and it's no risk to future fertility. If you've ever had unprotected sex, forgot your birth control, had a condom break, or you're just not sure, we are so excited
Starting point is 00:22:02 to talk about this new company that is giving emergency contraception a much needed rebrand. Julie is an FDA approved morning after pill that helps stop pregnancy before it starts. And honestly, at a time like we're living in right now, which is crazy, the morning after pill is more important than ever to just have it on hand because I'm sorry, but I don't want a pregnancy that I don't want. Right. And it's legal in all 50 states. You do not need an ID, prescription, or credit card to get it. And Julie is not just a Morning After Pill. It's a Morning After Pill brand that's working to increase access to emergency contraception for women across the country. Julie has a one-for-one donation program, and every time you purchase Julie at a store or
Starting point is 00:22:45 online, the company donates one pill to someone who needs it, and Julie partners with over 25 organizations across the country to provide donations to those disproportionately impacted by health inequities. You can go to JulieCare.co to learn more or find Julie at your nearest CVS, Target, or Walmart today. That's juliecare.co to learn more. So Kalilah, you're the one that actually taught me about Athletic Greens and you take it every day and you mix it in water and it helps with gut health. It helps, I know for me, I'm not a person that can deal with calculating what vitamins and minerals I need. Like the fact that Athletic Greens does it all in one place in one fell swoop is kind of the only way I'm ever going to be healthy. Yeah. And it's easy. It's how I start my mornings. I get eight ounces of water.
Starting point is 00:23:38 I one scoop of Athletic Greens. I take my little matcha stirrer, stir it in. Sometimes I add a little bit of ACV. Sometimes I don't. Either way, it tastes delicious. And it sort of just eliminates the guessing game for me for the rest of the day. Well, it's hard for me to keep up with a supplement routine that comes with a bunch of different products. Also, just even knowing where to start with supplements is even worse because I feel like I'll scroll TikTok and I'll hear, oh, you need this. Oh, you need that. It's too much. It's too confusing. AG1 has all the things you need. They've done the work, the homework for you. And I'm always looking for life hacks, which is why
Starting point is 00:24:13 I've come to love and trust AG1 by Athletic Greens. The all-in-one formula makes it easy for me to cover my nutritional bases every day. Every scoop is packed with 75 vitamins, minerals, and whole food source ingredients of the highest quality that give me major benefits like gut and mood support, boosted energy, and even healthier looking skin, hair, and nails. And if you're looking for an easier way to take supplements, Athletic Greens is giving you a free one-year supply of vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday. That's athleticgreens.com slash Tuesday. Check it out.
Starting point is 00:24:49 After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time, all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But but after talking to them it all made sense there isn't one mint mobile's secret sauce
Starting point is 00:25:10 is that they sell wireless services online they don't have retail stores or sales people instead they deliver premium phone plans directly to you as you guys know our friend rick glassman he uses mint mobile i learned about mint mobile through george kimmel ge is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls. And the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at $15 a month. And all plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5g network that is such a steal to get this new customer offer and your new three
Starting point is 00:25:49 month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month go to mintmobile.com slash tuesday that's mintmobile.com slash tuesday cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com slash tuesday 45 up front payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan. Additional taxes, fees and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. I have TMJ.
Starting point is 00:26:19 Yeah. Did you go to my guy? No, you never gave me your guy. I thought I told you about a while ago. I couldn't get- Wrong Kalilah. I need a guy. Can I have the guy? No you never gave me your guy I thought I told you About a while ago I couldn't get Wrong Kalilah I need a guy Can I have the guy?
Starting point is 00:26:28 Yeah What does he do? Does he go inside the mouth? I would like that He does mouth stuff I love mouth stuff Let me tell you something I had a bad
Starting point is 00:26:35 I had a bad jaw I went to my dentist I had a mold made It wasn't cheap It was like 600 bucks It helped a little That's pretty cheap For dental work
Starting point is 00:26:41 It's not nothing Wait you had a Was it a night guard? It was a night guard custom. It wasn't enough. So then I ended up going to this guy and it's magic. I referred a few people to him. What does he do?
Starting point is 00:26:53 It's a one-time fee, which he'll tell you after you meet with him to pay. Is it one retainer, top, bottom, or both? And then that pays for five to six months worth of treatment. So he gives you the retainer and then you go in for the first month once a week and then you go in as needed. Usually it'll be every few weeks to every month for a bit. It's about 10 minutes of a little physical therapy, does a little movements. He gives you exercises, stretches. He keeps changing the guard. And I could just get a toothbrush in for a while. And now I'm great. I think that, so what I'm hearing is your TMJ is from grinding because you need an actual guard.
Starting point is 00:27:31 Same with you. Grinding, clenching, and stress. Yeah. Which is the name of my next special. I don't. Your first special? It'd still be my next. I don't grind.
Starting point is 00:27:44 What do you do? I don't grind. What do you do? I don't grind. I just, I do this like facial flex. Clench. But I don't necessarily clench either because my dentist says he doesn't see a lot of evidence. You can usually see in your teeth, in your back teeth, if you have a lot of grinding and clenching.
Starting point is 00:27:59 Well, I have enough evidence just by the conversation we're having. Wait, can I ask you a question? Do you feel like if somebody came in and gave you like a really great, amazing jaw massage that you would get really horny? Probably. Any type of massage.
Starting point is 00:28:18 But he sounds great. I just don't know if I would benefit from a mouth guard. That's what's happening. What's happening? You're clenching. You're overworking the muscle. Also, there's a decent chance that it's not even and one side is overcompensating. You might be chewing uneven.
Starting point is 00:28:37 I think mine is stemming from my neck. It is. It is. Because I did go to a pain doctor specifically who does like TMJ stuff. And he was like, oh, all of your stuff is from your neck and it moves forward. Maybe go like this. Maybe fix. How do you feel now?
Starting point is 00:28:54 Not better. I realized that weed was helping with my jaw and my constipation. I quit weed and now those problems are back so you don't smoke weed anymore and now you can't poop well it's just it's harder again my gastrointestinal issues but aren't you on magnesium citrate i just started so because i quit weed i was looking for an alternative to help with relaxing and bowel movements and so i got those gummies, the Calm gummies, which are magnesium citrate. But you take magnesium.
Starting point is 00:29:30 I take magnesium, but I take like stuff that actually absorbs into the body. So I don't know about the gummies. Is mine, wait, mine's not good? I don't know. If it works for you, it works for you. Esther only takes medicine and candy for him. What was the penicillin chocolates
Starting point is 00:29:42 that you were taking when you had strep? Was it palisadal brownies? We'll be right back. Do you... So it's not good what I have? I don't know. If it works for you, are you pooping a lot?
Starting point is 00:29:54 Or enough? I wouldn't say a lot. Well, there were a lot of flies around her while we were waiting outside. Esther, am I wrong? Those were there when I got there. Yes, they were big fans of hers. Esther actually has a really great audience
Starting point is 00:30:03 of flies and rats. The fly and rat tour. That could be your next one. Would your parents go? I take a lot of magnesiums. What kind? I take a complex that has a lot of things, including citrate. But then when I'm feeling in the mood, and I often am,
Starting point is 00:30:19 I'll take some free plug, Mago 7, magnesium oxide. And that's the poop hero. That fills the intestines with water. So you just drink a lot of water with it and it helps flush out. The reason that either of those, Mag-site and Mag-oxide, does not work for me is because I already have GI problems. And so I cannot have anything that even irritates it or causes frequency. So I do the glycinate one now.
Starting point is 00:30:48 That's moderate. Glycerin is a moderate magnesium. Yeah. And you can quote me on that. I wonder if that's the best one. But of all the ones that have worked well on my heart palpitations and my little eye twitches is the glycinate.
Starting point is 00:31:01 It's changed my life. What is it doing to your body? Do you know? I think it's just, I don't know what it is, but I don't know how it directly. It calms the central nervous system, lets things relax.
Starting point is 00:31:11 You know, our intestines are just little fibers going to work and when they're stressed, you can relate. Jazz hands? But my heart issue, I have an electrical conductivity issue in my heart
Starting point is 00:31:21 and for some reason, I don't get as many palpitations. So it works for me highly recommend wow okay so we're all on the magnesium plug right now rick you're in um i'm asking you this because i'm on a a journey um a solo journey myself but you're not so solo anymore these days and i am in a relationship at the moment. We were talking before about like when you get out of a relationship,
Starting point is 00:31:50 then how long do you stay single? Is this what we're getting toward? Yep. I typically am single for a while between. Don't date much between. And that's a very intentional thing you do. It's intentional, yes, but not intentional like something I'm trying.
Starting point is 00:32:05 The analogy I gave was like you try not to eat sugar. You want sugar, but you're not eating the sugar. It's not like I want to be dating, but I think it's best for me. Fortunately, I believe, don't have the desire to, and I think that's good. Yeah, but are you hooking up with people? I mean, I have, and I have a great I'm not, I think I have a great analogy. Let's hear it. Ask me if I drink. Why do I have to ask you? I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 00:32:31 You're right. I shouldn't have asked you to help and play along on this podcast. Okay, do you drink? Sir, do you drink? Not really, no. I'm not sober. Like I'll have a drink, but usually no. Oh, so women are like a drink to you?
Starting point is 00:32:42 It's like having a drink? In the analogy, I'm not drawn to that. I'm like, if I'm somewhere and I'm in the mood for a drink, I'm not going to be like, I can't do this. But I'm not like... Actively seeking. I'm not actively seeking. I'm not like hooking up all the time.
Starting point is 00:32:59 No, nor am I looking for it. Do you leave the door open should someone really light you up in that way? Yeah, I do think that that door isn't open wide for the first while after a breakup. How long?
Starting point is 00:33:12 Eight months. Are you somebody that when the breakup happens you are grieving the breakup in that moment or are you a distraction guy? No, no, grieving. Oh, see, that's great.
Starting point is 00:33:23 I think that's why. Admittingly, I do look for distraction not with other women but like with weed and movies but no i'm grieving i'm i'm grieving i've noticed this in you i think which i relate to tell me if i'm wrong but like when i get dumped you've gotten dumped i and similar to what you're saying it's like I feel every feeling I'm so sad I like there is no escaping the feelings like I'm not like I feel like I see with guys typically which I'm it's interesting to hear you're not like that well I'm not a guy I'm a man um they want to hook up hook
Starting point is 00:34:01 up you know and they don't feel it and i'm i always am like god i i've always felt like yeah i've yeah that's more guys than girls i feel like girls move on quicker not a chance i i would if there was even a way to distract me from my pain i would do it but it's like there's no it's so sad i can't even think of like fucking someone else would make it exponentially worse for me doing Doing this, traveling, anything. I cannot escape from my grief in that moment. I can't think of a single thing to distract me from my grief. Like I am fully in a state of calamity.
Starting point is 00:34:34 And I liken it. That's a good t-shirt. In a state of, but you do Kalilah instead. I'm fully in a state of Kalilah. Well, my Instagram handle is calamity. Yeah, calamity. So it works. Thank you, Rick.
Starting point is 00:34:46 Follow her on Instagram. I liken it to the tortoise and the hare. Oh, you're saying that breaking up is like a tortoise and a hare? Yeah. That's what you just did to me. Oh, really? Girls are like drinks? Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:34:57 And let me guess, that women are the hare because they're hairy and ugly, and men are the tortoise because they have big dicks. Do tortoises have big dicks? Typically. They have 100 years to grow one tortoises have big dicks? Typically. They have a hundred years to grow one. I mean, I would hope so. I'm getting to a point that it is beneficial to everyone at this table,
Starting point is 00:35:10 which I think slow and steady wins the race. I think feeling it and feeling the pain at first and taking your time with it, I think in the long run, that is better and healthier. And I still don't know if those people that got over me really fast, if they were okay. There's a decent chance that they were not, and I don't't know if those people that got over me really fast if they were okay there's a decent chance that they were not and I don't mean this in a nice way interested in you to begin with do you know what I'm saying like maybe like you were around and because you
Starting point is 00:35:35 you need that validation so much it was easy does that make sense no this is actually a very big theme in my life that I'm realizing that I have sought male validation but it is meaningless because men have no standards. Now, that is an okay way for you to digest that it is not sustainable to feel that way by making fun of men. And I get that. I think men are pigs and if God exists, she's a woman. However.
Starting point is 00:36:00 I have nothing against men. I think men and women are equal, equally bad and equally good. I think women are a little better. I think you're... They're smarter. They're stronger. What they could do with their bodies. What they have to go through with the patriarchy.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Listen, I'm a man just like the next guy. But I am so impressed with women all the time. I think women are so helpful. Is that weird that you're even going out of your way to say that? It's like a weird... Out of my way? Formal... Really?
Starting point is 00:36:21 Sort of like... Wait, is that why you were a girl in the chat rooms? Huh. I never thought about that way but there is a chance that because you know like chat rooms were a place where you could be social from away for the first time and that made it easier for me i was trying to be like you know how like when your kids wear superhero costumes which I did like that was me being a superhero my mom fake my mom's a superhero fake I can't we can make jokes about it that's fine we don't have to get serious about it no I just I just I grew up with very strong women and that's why that's why you're attracted to models did you hear my joke no right put on the fucking headphones you pig i'm sorry i'm agreeing to do this podcast because there are
Starting point is 00:37:12 some i've been doing some fun little things everybody agrees i'm short circuiting that racist my brain is still in asia oh you're right i shouldn't put my finger but i am asian i'm allowed to do this i'm not no you know why you're right. I shouldn't put my finger. But I am Asian. I'm allowed to do this. I'm not. No, you know why you're not allowed to do it? Tell me. I don't know why. I think you should be allowed to do it. Micromanage an Asian about being Asian. No one here is not allowed to do
Starting point is 00:37:35 There's no rules. Everyone's allowed to do whatever they want here. Do you feel not allowed certain things? Yeah, I don't feel like I'm allowed to have my nuance picked up on because you don't wear headphones. We don't wear headphones. Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick. If you know what I'm saying, Rick.
Starting point is 00:37:51 If you know what I'm saying. So your mom was your hero. You loved your mommy, so you were a mommy in the chat rooms. Oh, I was a mommy. Mommy made you a little too confident. Hey, pretty boys, show me your fucking cock
Starting point is 00:38:03 and I'll eat your ass. No, really, what would you say? Show me your cock, I'll eat your ass. No, really. What would you say? Show me your cock, I'll eat your ass. Why? I'm just joking. I really don't remember the things I would say, but I do remember A slash S slash L. Cyber question mark. Do you want a cyber?
Starting point is 00:38:19 It's a privilege I never got to partake in. It makes so much sense that you and I both did this in our parents' basement. It wasn't sexual. I mean, there might have been some subconscious thing that I didn't recognize, but I do remember the feeling of like, this doesn't feel sexual. I know I'm lying, but I didn't even feel like I was doing something wrong. It really felt like... Intuitive?
Starting point is 00:38:41 It just felt experimental. Like, what is this? First of all, experimental into the world of chat rooms which was new at the time anyway and then doing something that i could never do elsewhere i don't remember why originally it was a woman i don't know if it was always a woman it also wasn't always like like it's like it wasn't cyber necessarily age sex location that's what that's the how you're doing back in the day it wasn't even trying to to see. Could you put a picture up of yourself? No, you'd have to send it to them.
Starting point is 00:39:07 And it was always send to receive, S2R. So you would have to. You show me yours, I'll show you mine. I feel like my growth is stunted because I never got to do this. Absolutely. Right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:18 If you pretended you were a man in a chat room when you were 10, you would be way better off. I think so. Most people I know I don't think did what we, I think there's a reason that. I don't want to throw this person under the bus, although I don't think they care.
Starting point is 00:39:32 But a very good friend of mine did the same thing and also pretended he was a girl. Okay, that is weird to me because I, why did you guys pretend you were girls? Can we get anywhere with it? Yeah, well, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:39:45 I never thought about this. I'm hypothesizing live on the take, what's this? I was going to say the take your shoes off podcast. What is this called? Trash Tuesday. Maybe it was easier to talk to a guy as a girl than it would be to talk to a girl as a guy.
Starting point is 00:39:58 That makes sense. Probably more people in that room were guys. Now, that's not a conscious thing I remember, but maybe I did both and I found that there was more interaction were guys. Now, that's not a conscious thing I remember, but maybe I did both and I found that there was more interaction from guys. And it wasn't like I'm stroking my fucking dick. It was just like, oh, where are you from? It was relatively wholesome.
Starting point is 00:40:16 But it was still like dating. I actually understand. It was sexual, but it wasn't physically sexual. The content for me was sexual, but I didn't have any sexual feelings at all. At all? No. In fact like
Starting point is 00:40:27 Well you didn't go through puberty until you were 33 right? Wait so I for me it was phone sex lines. Right. If we called the 900 numbers people like you
Starting point is 00:40:38 and your family would answer. Well they weren't necessarily sex lines they were called party lines. And so you would hear someone's voice just on voice alone and then you would say hello if you did not like the way they sound sounded you would hit a number and then it would go to the next person kind of like how better help you
Starting point is 00:40:55 could switch your therapist at any time very quickly yes so um can we cut to better help this show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Getting to know yourself can be a lifelong process, especially because we are always growing and changing. Hello, look at me. I'm a different person every single day. Therapy is all about deepening your self-awareness and understanding because sometimes we don't know what we want. We don't know why we react the way we do until we talk through things with someone who's there to listen. And BetterHelp connects you with a licensed therapist who can take you on that journey of self-discovery from wherever you are. I have to say that without therapy, I would not be able to be in a healthy relationship. I would not be able to have a healthy working relationship with you and Annie. And I just, I can't imagine,
Starting point is 00:41:47 my life would be in the gutter without therapy. Same. And you guys, it's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Discover your potential with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp.com slash trash Tuesday. So I don't know about you, but organizing money is a challenge. And I'm definitely someone who will sign up for any subscription and forget about it. And that is why Rocket Money has been such an asset to my life. Because Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place.
Starting point is 00:42:39 Over 80% of people have subscriptions they forget about. And chances are you're one of them. Like, for instance, I had this insect finder so weird and i had this other anime app that i didn't know my niece had downloaded onto my phone and i have paying like an obnoxious amount every year i have so many streaming services it's like it's dark rocket money will quickly and easily find your subscriptions for you and for any you don't want to pay for anymore, just hit cancel and Rocket Money will cancel it for you. It's that easy. Rocket Money also helps you manage all of your finances in one place and automatically categorize your expenses so you can easily track your budget in real time and also get alerted if anything looks off, which is important.
Starting point is 00:43:22 Over 3 million people have used Rocket Money, saving the average person up to $720 a year. Stop throwing your money away, cancel unwanted subscriptions, and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday. That's rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday, rocketmoney.com slash trash Tuesday. After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers if we've learned anything it's that there's always a catch so when i heard that for a limited time all mint mobile wireless plans are 15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan i thought where's the catch but after talking to them it all made sense there isn't one mint mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans
Starting point is 00:44:08 directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel. George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls. And the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans mint mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at 15 bucks a month and all plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5g network that is such a steal to get this new customer offer and your new three month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month go to mint mobile.com slash, go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday.
Starting point is 00:44:46 That's mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month at mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three-month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes. On unlimited plan, additional taxes additional taxes fees and restrictions apply statement mobile for details um could we try this out could i call and you be who you're talking about and you be the voice i'm gonna call this party line you guys do this you recreate my party
Starting point is 00:45:17 line experience fine but if i switch we're gonna go to you yeah and you and also give esther a little bit of notes like what should esther know Like what types of voices? Give her some ideas of what. Be yourself. Be who you were back then. No, but she's the part. She's at work. These girls have a certain. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:45:32 That's not how it worked. It wasn't a sex line. It was a phone number everyone could call to meet people. Like Omegle. Yeah, it was basically like a Tinder. Oh, so we're both trying to talk to somebody. It's not like I'm calling to talk to a, pardon the joke, a hot girl. Right?
Starting point is 00:45:52 Right, correct. Right, gotcha. All right, let's try it. Will you do the ring sound effect, please? Okay. But do it like this. Ring, ring. Ring, ring.
Starting point is 00:46:00 Hello? Hi. Hi. I'm sorry, I'm a little nervous. I don't... Hi. Hi. How old sorry. I'm a little nervous. I don't. Hi. Hi. How old are you?
Starting point is 00:46:09 How old are you? 30. Same. Do you like TV? Are you okay? Yeah. Switch. It's like Next.
Starting point is 00:46:25 You remember that show? Yeah. Yeah. No, it's like Chat Roulette. Didn't you guys do that? What is that? You know what it is. I know what it is.
Starting point is 00:46:32 Okay. It's like... I'm sure if it's Roulette, then there's a chat involved. Yeah, it's like a video, and then you keep clicking it, and it's like... Like you're matched up with random people, but a lot of times people would be like, they'd be out with their schwants, and they'd be like jerking off, and became very unwholesome oh a lot of penises you guys remember hot or is it hot or not yeah hot or not.com i would never go near that why you don't think people would find you beautiful i don't know i don't want to know yes you do and they won't so um it's uh yeah it's a site that just like matches you up like live you get to talk to
Starting point is 00:47:06 somebody oh it still exists it's omegle now shout out to harry mack by the way who's a rapper who does it on meagle all the time and just random people will come up hello and he goes he's unbelievable do you guys know harry mack he's he's unbelievable it's actually probably what's one of my favorite podcasts i've done was him on mine but he's so good and he'll like ask somebody for three random words and he'll freestyle and it's like good but then you see these people who are just people in their bedrooms reacting there's something very cool about matching up with people i just think people take advantage and become very dirty and inappropriate because they had the anonymity you mean like what exactly what we did when we were children in chat rooms yeah maybe but but again i i i wasn't i wasn't i wasn't and i it seemed like you weren't either like
Starting point is 00:47:52 being dirty what we were doing was weird but like it was i was i was a kid and i was experimenting like what is it like talking to guys and girls and how do other guys talk to girls i want to hear it and it wasn't like me showing the penis or trying to get pictures of a penis or a vagina. Would you try to? It wasn't sexual. I definitely wanted to exchange photos, but I agree that it wasn't sexual, weirdly.
Starting point is 00:48:17 It was more experimenting in the world. Yeah, that was not my experience. In the party lines, I was always reaching for my toothbrush to stick into my... Really? I would get into... Hold on, I don't know what you were going to say.
Starting point is 00:48:30 To stick into your mouth to brush your teeth? It was brushing something. Wait, what age? You're painting your teeth in your tongue? What age is this? As a teenager. Not as a 10-year-old, but by the time I was like 15, 16,
Starting point is 00:48:44 and this was... I, 16 and you know, this was, I didn't have a computer. So I, and I would get super, super horny and I would just want to hear someone's voice across the line. And I would, we would just talk dirty and I would find my toothbrush and use it to
Starting point is 00:48:59 masturbate. Cause that was the only thing like I, I could, I, I had that was of a certain length how far do you need don't you only need to to go in a few inches only if you're right you're right thank you for that rick all of my nerves are right at the entrance if you go any deeper it's like no man's land i don't know why you like the type of guys you do go ahead did you
Starting point is 00:49:20 get up to a finish line yeah and. And I would feel extreme shame. Did you ever masturbate in a footlocker? In the footlocker? In a footlocker? Is that what you did? Obviously, you'd like to masturbate in a finish line. I was just curious. I would have sent it to other places.
Starting point is 00:49:36 We'll be right back. Yeah, but I was a really, really horny kid. So you would literally brush your G-spot? I would brush my G-spot because it was the bristle end. And I would do things like I would find the baseball dugout. And I would have sex with... Anywhere I could find any weird cut of I would have sex with a boy. Do you now fantasize ever about masturbating with an electric toothbrush
Starting point is 00:50:00 because of what toothbrushes mean to you? And follow-up question, do you think this is why you have TMJ? because of what toothbrushes mean to you? And follow-up question, do you think this is why you have TMJ? I think that I don't use any sexual toys anymore because I don't like to keep upping the bar for my, you know, to come. Instead of grinding.
Starting point is 00:50:17 Like last night, last night, I swear to you guys, this is so embarrassing. It took me six seconds to come. swear to you it was i was watching the show beef and there was this really hot scene with ali ali wong and um this other asian guy again hot asians and i was like oh fuck it's like i'm so jet lag what am i gonna do to put myself to sleep do you have a clip clip Can we cut to a clit? And so I swear to you, like I shocked myself. I put my hand on my pussy and that was it. Really?
Starting point is 00:50:52 And I was like, oh, fuck. That's New York, man. You had my address. I know we are so close. Yeah, you didn't tell me where you were. But isn't that incredible? I needed nothing. Well, you're not desensitized by all of the machinery
Starting point is 00:51:06 Right and I never want to be Because you use toothbrushes on your vagina Would you consider maybe you don't clench I don't use toothbrushes in my vagina anymore Rick I was doing a jaw kegel joke And if you had on your headphones This wouldn't be a fucking problem would it? You think?
Starting point is 00:51:21 Yeah Do you? I don't I think a jaw kegel joke would be a problem Headphones are not Oh I thought do you I don't yeah I think a jaw Kegel joke would be a problem I don't think it makes sense do you do you jerk off tell me again I do did you floss your pussy did I floss my pussy mmm no cuz that would cut my clit oh I just thought you like really small and thin penises. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:51:48 What's this whole printer story that's going to be really worth it? Well, I just want to let you become aware of the condescension in your voice. Because that makes me not want to tell the story anymore. I'm very vulnerable. Let me provide you a safe place.
Starting point is 00:52:03 Safe space, Rick Rick Look into my eyes I want to hear The printer's story It's more of an anecdote So there I am I'm doing my thing I wanted pictures Of them
Starting point is 00:52:16 Because Carmen And Jenny McCarthy Jenny McCarthy Carmen Electra And And Pamela Anderson Were the women
Starting point is 00:52:24 Arnold Schwarzenegger Sylvester Stalloneone, and Van Damme were the men. I was obsessed with muscles. Wait. Sly, Van Damme, and? Schwarzenegger was king. I mean, Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Van Damme. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:38 I really loved, obviously, as a kid, superheroes. And muscles were very cool. And I wanted to be that. And I became obsessed with Arnold. I don't remember what. Maybe T2. But then I went back to all the other stuff. Barbarians and such.
Starting point is 00:52:55 Isn't this interesting that you probably saw the muscly guys win? Here's your big shot. Get the girls. So that's what you wanted to be. But meanwhile, me and kalilah are both examples of women here who are not into the big muscly guys well what's that about interesting interesting because i'm so attracted to you that what a bummer however um if i weren't so allergic to flies and rats i would maybe give you a shot i like muscles because muscles were cool I still feel that way
Starting point is 00:53:25 I mean you look at you look at athletes like specifically cool basketball players not athletes just basketball players and they just like their builds
Starting point is 00:53:33 it's just I don't know they're like superheroes but I for me it's not the muscles I like agility then you'd love me because I like them
Starting point is 00:53:43 like I said you know I like them a little thick I like a like I said you know I like them a little thick I like a belly but it's all about whether or not someone is able
Starting point is 00:53:51 and coordinated because that to me translates have you seen my character piece I am phenomenal available now on YouTube I have
Starting point is 00:53:58 I have do you see how agile I was you are so so athletic surprisingly can I ask a question one sec go on should people check it out should your fan base check it out what should they do go to my channel at Rick Larson just YouTube I am phenomenal when I think about it look at me I'm undressing stop that's inappropriate
Starting point is 00:54:15 I'm you're right you're in a relation now I'm so sorry I was trying to do that what's it like sorry has he been here the whole time? Has he? Yeah. Last night he kept walking out of the room and he'd look at me and be like, nice to meet you, dude. What is it like if you're so agile? I'm so sorry, sir. One second. You were talking about how athletic I am? Yeah, and I liked, what was the title of your?
Starting point is 00:54:40 I Am Phenomenal. You Are Phenomenal, Rick. Thank you. Incredibly phenomenal. And you know, we just had our 200th episode of the Take Your Shoes Off podcast. And last time I was here, I didn't tell people about my podcast. Oh, they know. Wonderful. Well, what is it like though?
Starting point is 00:54:54 Ah! Jesus. I'm so sorry. Take off that. What are you wearing? Take that off. Can we get some more sweat under our pits? Oh, never mind mind i thought they were
Starting point is 00:55:05 drying up go ahead okay i want it progress report oh they're not so bad no not so bad it's weird i mean she hasn't done anything but okay you're gonna ask about my agility yeah you so you know you're so agile but yeah it seems like you really need like go ahead go ahead spit in your mouth and you're laughing too soon because you anticipated something being funny try it again it seems like you really really you know how agile you are but you really need the external validation for it what's that about talking to me like i'm a puppy it seems like you're really agile but you need to who's your little baby who's so agile oh will you google search green tongue and see what that means i think you should get that checked honestly do you go to doctors are
Starting point is 00:55:52 you afraid that they're going to find everything honestly honestly you're a monster i look at you and i'm whenever i'm with you i'm reminded i have a good time with you because of how funny i am and you enjoy it you're a monster look at me you're a monster thank you you because of how funny I am and you enjoy it. You're a monster. Look at me. You're a monster. Thank you. You're an insecure monster. Thank you for plugging my Instagram at Esther Monster. Oh my God. What a calamity.
Starting point is 00:56:12 I had no idea. That's at Rick Glassman. No, but seriously, and I want you to know that this is coming from- No, I understand what you're saying and I can answer that because there is truth to it. Okay. First of all, I'm not hiding behind it. There is a very strong level of irony i come on i plug better help or mattresses or my other videos or my podcast i do think it's
Starting point is 00:56:30 fun to self-promote however why am i choosing to do that yes i have actually what i'm saying has nothing to do with self-promotion you're no no no no no i know what you're let me let me get this out or you have your headphones on. But why is it that I'm like, I'm choosing to promote these things? And I'm not going to get too much into it just because I've talked about it on a podcast. Again, it has nothing to do with you promoting. I'm getting there.
Starting point is 00:56:54 It was about you seeking validation from her calling you agile. I'm getting there. It had nothing to do with promoting. I don't know if you... Maybe if you put your headphones on, you'd hear me. Okay.
Starting point is 00:57:00 I'm getting there. I hear you. Great. Why is it that these are the things agile... Oh, sorry. Could we get her some... What do you want? Shrimp?
Starting point is 00:57:10 What do you normally eat? Could we get her some shrimp and some type of a milkshake? It doesn't matter which kind. I started playing basketball late in high school. And that's when I first started getting friends. When I first started getting confidence. When I first started feeling included. Ooh, this is sad.
Starting point is 00:57:26 So it's actually beautiful. I understand why it's sad. You have yet to be included. No, that's not true. You have a podcast now that people now know you, right? You're single. How come you stopped doing your solo podcast? I didn't.
Starting point is 00:57:36 I still have it. It's called My Pleasure. Gotcha. People watch it? They listen. It's only audio. The audio number's good? They're pretty good.
Starting point is 00:57:43 I'm happy, yes. Oh, good. I didn't really have friends. And then I started playing basketball. And just by the idea of us having a common goal, which is practicing at this time, trying to win. Yeah. I was part of a team.
Starting point is 00:57:56 And there is a camaraderie with teams. I talked about this, I think, on Sickler's podcast recently. But I feel the same way about comedy. Even though we're all doing our own thing, especially when we were first starting. I can't wait till you land the plane. How we were like this team, and we're showing up at the comic store,
Starting point is 00:58:12 we had our improv troupe. You feel included. Totally. A family. Yeah. And accepted, and we're all different, but you want people around, and you offer value. I'm making you laugh.
Starting point is 00:58:22 That makes me valuable. Shared interests. Yes. So basketball was the first time I really experienced that. around and you offer value. I'm making you laugh. That makes me like shared interests. Yes. Yes. So basketball was the first time I really experienced that. So there is a part of me that though I'm aware of it, it still exists where I had this identity that I'm good at basketball. I want people to know I'm good at basketball. When I would go into gyms and people knew who I was, I wouldn't have to wait to play. They got Glassman, and that always felt so good. One, I get to play,
Starting point is 00:58:46 but two, like, am I cool? Do people like me? And I feel the same way about dance. I grew up dancing, and I was quite good. Yeah. But if we're going where I think you're going, which I hope you are
Starting point is 00:58:58 because I don't know where else you could be going. So when Kalilah says, oh, you're athletic, there is a part of me, through jokes, but it's inspired and true, where it's like, I want people to know. I'm not just some fucking Jewish goof who's always doing like, oh, oh, oh, you know. Okay. I'm cool, man.
Starting point is 00:59:15 So there is part of me that's like selling cool. Yeah. But see, that's so you didn't answer. You just sort of confirmed what I said. Why do you need that external validation? For example, me, I know I'm an amazing dancer. That's why you keep bringing it up multiple times. That's your fourth time.
Starting point is 00:59:30 I don't actually. You just did it. I don't need people. And you said amazing dancer. I don't need people to tell me. I feel it. I practice it. I know it.
Starting point is 00:59:40 Yeah. But it seems like you really need to be told. No, it came up organically but maybe i'm wrong maybe i have a blind spot okay but i'm just curious do you really feel that way about yourself or do you need the validation from the external world the validation from that okay i never needed that that there are out of the things that i could argue i would need validation from that was that wouldn't be one of them because that, what do I need validation for? Um,
Starting point is 01:00:06 I, we all need validation. It's okay. None of us would be sitting here if we didn't. But I think that I've seen you move and I have seen your, your full agile self. Also, I'm a great dancer. And I think that,
Starting point is 01:00:20 um, I'm agile. You really are that good, Rick, that I, I don't think maybe you don't you need as much validation there because i think you know i'm not worried i'm not i really i really i also like consciously trying to not sound offensive to let esther feel heard um esther and but no i don't think so but it does make me feel good it does make me feel good like when other people on podcasts talk about me as a basketball player or or even just someone says, Rick, I heard you.
Starting point is 01:00:48 Absolutely, it's part of me where I go, I'm glad you know. It's a separate part of you that you're not showing daily, I think. In the same way that you're like, oh my God, Esther can dance? And you are a very good dancer. You are. Thank you. But I feel the exact same way when people are like no you know she's a swimmer she does this she spent her whole life being in the water i'm like i have i did totally so amazing
Starting point is 01:01:14 in the water i totally agree and i think we all there's no way we don't all love compliments i get it i am just personally on my own journey of learning about my validation needs. Thank you for sharing with everybody. Yes. Your own journey. And so what I'm learning is that I think people who are truly whole and confident and have self-esteem and self-worth, they don't really need compliments about things that they feel whole with. May I?
Starting point is 01:01:45 You may. I think people that are fully whole or even on their way and pretty enlightened don't feel the need to let other people know how incomplete they are. Now, I think that's a projection that you're doing because you're a miserable person. And I mean that in the worst way. And I've admitted that. And I'm digging in for podcast reasons here. I also think there's something very important,
Starting point is 01:02:03 and this has been my journey for about six years now, of understanding what you are, both how you sell yourself, why you sell yourself, and what it is that you're selling. I love that. And accepting that thing. And there are things about me that they are what they are. Am I perfect?
Starting point is 01:02:17 I think so. However, some people might think that's subjective. There are things about me that like, this is the thing I am. I will like when people think I'm a good athlete. It will make me feel good. If I were completely enlightened and I didn't need external validation, I wouldn't need that. But then I also wouldn't get the fun connection and that fun feeling. I am somebody who has both insecurities and also very little, if any, shame about them. This is the thing that I am.
Starting point is 01:02:47 Truthfully, I love who I am. And it feels good to be accepted. I mean, like validation from an audience of people laughing at you and clapping, like recognizing that is how you know what jokes work. Absolutely. I actually, and I have talked about this on podcasts, and so bad at that because I don't understand what people are thinking.
Starting point is 01:03:05 What do you mean? I don't. When I do a show and I hear people laughing, I hear it. I don't know if they really think it's funny or what they think is funny. Oh, well, I can. I, I often, especially in the starting early days of my comedy, I never knew what was going to be funny. Well, you nothing. But is that what you mean? Or what I'm saying is, and again, I'm feeling a little insecure
Starting point is 01:03:31 about talking about this too much because I've talked about it on mine and others, but I am, I am not very in touch with how other people receive me. Even if they're laughing and doing this, whatever I think about me is what I me, that's the only thing that I believe. Well, that's good. It's great. It has gotten in my way a little bit because there is a social contract that you have where, for example, I bust your balls a lot.
Starting point is 01:03:56 We've had conversations off podcasts about this where I've asked you and you have told me, this is fun, we're having a good time. Do you understand what I'm saying? Yeah. If people didn't know us, right? And you just took jump cuts of the things I say to you and not see your reaction and not the engagement, I could look mean.
Starting point is 01:04:14 Now I could be the same exact thing and you being turned off, now I'm mean. Or I could be this thing and you laughing and people really love it. I'm still the same person, but people are looking at the reaction shots. So it is important for me to see how I'm being received. And I do have a hard time understanding that. Yes. But I do think there's a superpower in the other version of it because a lot of the times you'll see people dictate their content.
Starting point is 01:04:44 Oh, I'm surprised you didn't tell me to have the worst posture. She has great posture. They'll dictate what they say. They'll pander. And I think when you have the skill that you have so honed in on, which is knowing,
Starting point is 01:04:56 only caring about what you think and feel, which is what I'm working on as a creative person, is like, what do I really feel? As opposed to, I don't want to do just because, oh, people like this one thing. Like, I want to do what I want to to do so i do think that's a very valuable there's skill there's something that you said that it's a semantic but i want to change you said not caring about what other people think i don't believe in that that's
Starting point is 01:05:15 not a real thing fuck what other people think it doesn't matter what other people think um it does matter what other people think there's a difference between what i'm about to say in that what other people think does matter i just don between what I'm about to say and that. What other people think does matter. I just don't prioritize what they think over what I do. Does that make sense? Right. It's kind of the same thing. Well, here's why it's different.
Starting point is 01:05:33 And I'll give another analogy with stand-up and fear. I used to be very, I still get scared. I used to get very scared to go up on stage. And there was a moment where I had this realization where I accepted, oh, that's what I do. I get scared. And instead of pretending I'm not scared and wiping off my palms or psyching myself up and just like, instead of that, I have accepted that fear is not only okay, it's a guarantee. And I'm just not going to let it control my decisions. Totally.
Starting point is 01:06:02 So what that means is, am I scared? No, fuck that. I don't care. No, absolutely. I'm scared. But because I know that and I've accepted it, it doesn't need to be in the front of my mind and I could still be present while I'm scared. I use that exact same thing when I'm sad about something. Instead of saying, don't be sad. I'm so mad at myself for being sad. I'm like, I'm sad about this. That's what you were saying about grieving and going feeling your feelings. Yes. Yeah. So I feel that way about not, the idea of not caring what other people think i think that's that language gets in the way of how you see personal interactions because if i am trying to get myself to this confident place and i'm like i don't care what you think i'm not going to go in this conversation and not care what you
Starting point is 01:06:37 think i do care and i'm interested but it's not going to control my my my self-identity the bottom line i think you are right that it's semantics because it's kind of the same thing we're talking about which is like when i post i posted a clip yesterday from our podcast saying that my sexual fantasy is to be a jewish girl and a nazi saves me to have sex with me and so many people are like this is fucked up you're wrong for posting this and i like my attitude going in has to be like this is i set a sexual fantasy of mine and i needed the whole world to know and if you and i don't care but here's on top of that because i read or i read esther perel's book yeah which one it's basically
Starting point is 01:07:21 like your politics and your standing beliefs about life, all the things, have nothing to do with your sexual kinks. They are fully separate because she has a lot of patients who go in who are basically what anyone would call a feminazi, but love, have rape kinks, have the most fucked up kinks.
Starting point is 01:07:42 I bet you there's a through line to those too. There's a suppression. But there is no through. you there's a through line to those too. There's a suppression. But there is no through. Maybe there's a through line. No, I'm saying like when guys or girls go to only guys or only girls school and they're not allowed to go out and drink and they have to be home by 10. There's a suppression of things that they may have wanted to at least experiment with, like us in chat rooms, that the pendulum swings the other way pretty far.
Starting point is 01:08:05 I think that- Like a lot of priests who aren't allowed to do stuff ends up doing this. Right, but I'm just saying like as, well, with priesthood, it's different because there is a real suppression there. But for someone who is, you know, not suppressing their sexual anything,
Starting point is 01:08:20 I would, well, Esther Perel basically says this, that like you, those compartments in your brain can live very, very separately and one doesn't have anything to do with the other. And I would, I would agree with that because even me being somebody who's been sexually assaulted, like the weird, like you would think that my body would reject the experience or reject the thought of anything that would suggest yeah you would think if you were sexually assaulted you would like white men correct right but my kinks do not correlate with my trauma like almost at all subconsciously in no way sex sex is just in the spirit of play i can fully take myself to a place where i am just fully sexual that is not like there are no strings to the other parts of my brain or my morality or my value system at all i can i can confidently say that and i would also say that my that kink that i have is probably just because ray fines was super hot in schindler's list and he was a naz. And it's like, if Spielberg didn't want me
Starting point is 01:09:25 to be attracted to Nazis, he should have cast someone uglier. That's a good t-shirt. Thank you. I'm not joking. It is. If Spielberg didn't want me to be attracted to Nazis,
Starting point is 01:09:35 he would have cast somebody uglier. Yes. He would have cast me. Wait, that wasn't Liam Neeson? No, Liam Neeson was Oscar Schindler. Ralph Fiennes was the evil. Spoiler alert. Right, right, right, right. Not as funny as I remember. I rewatched it. I think Dumb and Dumber is funnier. Liam Neeson? No, Liam Neeson was Oscar Schindler. Ralph Fiennes was the evil. Spoiler alert.
Starting point is 01:09:46 Right, right, right, right. Not as funny as I remember. I rewatched it. I think Dumb and Dumber is funnier. But I do like what you say. I think that you should lead with that kind of fearless. I've just, yeah, I've just decided and I wonder if you relate to this. I'm very curious actually,
Starting point is 01:10:02 because you seem like I can't tell where you won't land on this but like I can't do this thing that I've signed up to do if I'm not going to be so open and free and like freedom to upset people,
Starting point is 01:10:15 freedom to express myself honestly. Like that's what I need for this to work. Otherwise, I've done it the other way for years where I'm hiding and holding back. That doesn't help me and it's not artistically or creatively fulfilling. Otherwise, I've done it the other way for years where I'm hiding and holding back. That doesn't help me and it's not artistically or creatively fulfilling.
Starting point is 01:10:29 Now, does that mean I don't give a fuck what other people think? A little. Not so crudely. Yeah, well, because you're choosing to share to these people that you don't care what they think. So that's not real. Well, I'm-
Starting point is 01:10:43 Because you wouldn't be sharing it for them. So it's what, I guess it is the semantics of what you said i'm prioritizing what i think and and those semantics are relevant i we talked about this on one of the one of the the um tiger bellies that i did with you guys but i i really believe that the language we use to ourselves changes the way we see the world. I agree. And that idea of, and the example I think I gave there was instead of I have to do something, I get to do something. I have to come to New York and do this podcast today. I get to do this.
Starting point is 01:11:15 Totally. Like this idea of like certain language literally instills gratitude and excitement and positivity and not, I think caring what people think is such an important good thing, at least for them to be understood, even if you don't agree with them. You know, that's a really good point you're making because I've kind of like started thinking about the types of people who deem themselves truth tellers and brutally honest. And I'm like, I think that those are the most cruel people on earth because i think they enjoy being honest as much as they enjoy being brutal and cruel and and
Starting point is 01:11:52 if if you're somebody that i love and care about i'm gonna tell a few lies i'm going to mince my words i'm going to say certain things depending on how you're appearing in front of me and your mood. Like, I mean, I'm not going to lie about big things, right? But like people who just are just so like piercing all the fucking time. I'm like, no, do you not care about like the person's like if my sister is having a bad day, like I'm going to dance around her sensitivities that day because I care about her and I don't want to make it worse. And if that involves a white lie, I'm going to do it. I don't believe in brutal honesty at all
Starting point is 01:12:35 because I think it's just that, it's brutal. I don't believe it's as binary as that. And I have a strong take on what you're saying. But before I do, would you like to use the bathroom or something? I'm okay for now, thank you. Do you need? Yeah, are you projecting? Yes.
Starting point is 01:12:50 You have poopoos? Yeah. Okay. No, I'm okay. No, go poop. Really, I'm okay. I was really, because I was talking,
Starting point is 01:12:58 and then you were talking, and then I was gonna go back, and I just wanted to include, one more time, Esther. Ethel. Ethel. So, I do think that people use honesty sometimes and really believe this that, well, I'm being honest.
Starting point is 01:13:15 So it's almost like I'm allowed to do it. I really think they believe it. For whatever reason, I don't think that matters. They believe it. I think there is so much value in always being honest. Now, always, I don't mean you're a robot. Yes, people lie. There's a spectrum of it and what makes a lie.
Starting point is 01:13:33 But like- But if there's a spectrum of lie, there's also a spectrum of honesty then, right? But by a spectrum of lie, I mean like you said, lying about big things or little things, things that don't really matter or like things that are not necessarily lies. If I could tell that you don't want to eat now and I'm a little hungry and you ask, like you said, lying about big things or little things, things that don't really matter or like things that are not necessarily lies.
Starting point is 01:13:45 Like if I could tell that you don't want to eat now and I'm a little hungry and you ask you hungry, I'm like, no, I'm OK, because I know that you want to keep like there are things shorthand. But there are also ways of being honest tactfully, both in the way you do it and the timing of it. For example, if your sister's in a bad mood and she says, how was my how did my dress look tonight? You don't have to say it was the most beautiful dress in the world. You could say you are so beautiful and you know, whatever, like you're so beautiful. I had such a great time, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then later on, if you think it offers her value to not wear that thing again, if you think you, you could bring it up at a time where she could hear it. I, you're confused. I, I don't have a strong point of view yet, but in this example, I'm like,
Starting point is 01:14:28 is it a little gaslighty though? If she knows she feels, looks bad and you're saying you look great. That's what I'm saying the tact is. So if she says, how does this, check this out. If you don't like my outfit. I don't. Right.
Starting point is 01:14:40 So good example. Thank you. And I say, how's my outfit? And you could tell that I need, I'm feeling a little something where I need a little reassurance, right? Okay, I say. And I say, how's my outfit? And you could tell that I need, I'm feeling a little something where I need a little reassurance, right? Okay, I say- You could say, Rick, you look,
Starting point is 01:14:49 without talking about my outfit, you could say, Rick, you look handsome today. Your posture's good, you look funny. But you asked about your outfit. That's what I'm saying. There's a political way around it. But then if you're doing, if we're doing this, and I'm you, I'm gonna be like,
Starting point is 01:15:01 well, I asked about my outfit. All right, let's do it. Okay. I value honesty very, very, very, very much because I need it. I need it because I didn't always get it and I didn't know. I don't know when people are lying. I don't know if they even know when they're lying. I value it.
Starting point is 01:15:15 And I do look at information above my ego where I can. If it triggers me, it triggers me. But like, I want the information. So doing that, i do it the other way and there are jokes and they're silly and let's do a real example of it if i see that you need some validation which i know you don't then here's how it would go so go ahead and ask me the question you have to ask me um but let's do it real because i'm going to be real okay so you could be present doesn't have to be a scene just ask me now okay do you uh
Starting point is 01:15:45 do you think that i'm attractive before i answer that great one good one i want to know what your intention like are you being playful or no i'm like do you think like if dave dumped me that like i could get someone good no okay so you didn't do the thing? I did the thing and I made a point and I made a strong one. You laugh at that stuff all the time, but you were looking for something else. I know with you, if you were really asking me something, the way I would do it were to be a little bit fighty and a little playful to make sure that our conversations were authentic. Because otherwise, tell me what you think of this.
Starting point is 01:16:25 Ask me the question again. Do you think I'm attractive? You're beautiful. Do you believe me? No. Right. I'm so confused. Yeah, I think we're dancing around this in a way.
Starting point is 01:16:37 There was a little bit of play that didn't work. And that's, I'll take full blame. I guess the point I was making is this. You could always be honest. You can. Yeah, but I think that there are people as of late who are like, I know what you're saying.
Starting point is 01:16:53 I'm a truth teller. Those are people that think, hey, it ain't mean if it's true. Yeah. No, fuck you. Yes, it is. Your intention isn't to be kind. Your intention is to add,
Starting point is 01:17:04 to prove how honest you are. And that's selfish. They're getting off on it. They're getting off on knowing that and feeling smarter and holier than thou and better than you. Right. And I'm also in the, I'm basically people who have to announce their asset. Like I always say, like, beware of declarations. You do say that a lot.
Starting point is 01:17:23 If you have to announce your asset there's probably something that isn't honest can you give an example of what that is I'm a great dancer like it's like I guess I just have a really bad experience with one of my um uh younger relationships in my 20s where the guy was always like had to announce like i i'm not this or i'm not this i am this and i'm like well just be that show me that because then it was like oh like and later i found out he was not any of those things well that's the casting thing that's the i i i have a narrative of what i i want to be seen a certain way. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:06 That's what people and. But now people are saying, well, like, even the word truth teller is very like, I don't know, sends a chill down my spine. Yeah, because defining it. Yeah. I'm like, oh, you're that and I'm not that. Like, shut the fuck up. Like, you have to. And so now now you are like the gospel because you announced yourself as a truth teller because what, like maybe I'm somebody who is, you know,
Starting point is 01:18:31 not as, like I said, like I do dance around people's like feelings a little bit. That's really good at dancing around people's feelings. Show us. But I know what you're saying. If I am like, hey, like how do I look? And you're like, honestly,
Starting point is 01:18:46 I think you could put on something better that I do appreciate. Yeah. You want to know if you have a booger in your nose. You look better when the hair is covering your face. You look, you want somebody to tell you, you have something in your teeth, but you don't have them do it like,
Starting point is 01:18:56 Oh, like, Oh, you know, you do it like, Hey, finally you have a booger in your nose. And I think it's a beautiful booger,
Starting point is 01:19:03 but you might want to get rid of it. I will say that when I was in my early twenties, I had a friend once who was like, I'm a good person. And I remember walking away from that being like confused. Because I was like, I've never heard someone say to me that they're a good person. Dude. And then I was like, I feel like that feels weird. It's so weird. I talk about this on stage.
Starting point is 01:19:20 It feels weird. It's so weird. I talk about this on stage. This is a microcosm for other things, but chivalry and what you're supposed to do on dates or early dating. The idea of getting the car door for a girl. If we're coming from the passenger side, yeah, I'll get the door.
Starting point is 01:19:39 We're right here, whatever. But if we're coming from the driver's side, the idea of me going around the car with you to open the door for you feels so manipulative because this is me trying to show you I'm a good guy, which by the way I am and this isn't the reason and I don't want to get this door. If you told me it makes me feel good to get the door,
Starting point is 01:19:54 sure, I'll do it. But for me to pretend that this is what I do. I actually love that. I agree with that. Your goodness does not hinge on whether or not you're going to swing the door hinges open. Yeah. Is that the pun?
Starting point is 01:20:07 Yes. But that's the thing. There are things you're supposed to do. And the idea of what you're supposed to do, whatever the thing might be, it's a pleasure to meet you when you meet the girl's father. You know, I want to go home by nine. Is that how you do it? No.
Starting point is 01:20:24 How do you do it? I'm daddy. You could be the, this is my daughter you're dating. Sure. Hi. This is my dad. Do you think this is a make,
Starting point is 01:20:31 I'm not going to say it. So, so yeah, sir, sir. Hey, nice to meet you. Hey,
Starting point is 01:20:39 Rick. Hey, it's for horses, old man. Wow. Wow. Sorry. Wow. Sorry, dad. Does your daughter...
Starting point is 01:20:46 He's autistic. He's autistic? Yeah. That's a dick you suck? Hey, daddy. Does your daughter have health insurance? Daddy? Does your daughter have health insurance?
Starting point is 01:20:56 She will. Well, let me know when she does because I have a feeling I might split her open. Ew. Wait. Wait. I have... Okay. Pro and con to what you said i agree it's so much better and this is
Starting point is 01:21:12 the type of people that we are is like be in the moment don't do something that you're supposed to do because it shows that you're good like just be yourself be organic in the moment but counterpoint to that there might be some people that don't have the self-confidence to like know how to be in the moment and so they only know how to follow a certain rule book it doesn't necessarily mean that they're a crazy bad person absolutely totally okay i just want to put that there but i'm i'm a perfect example of that i'm in i'm a very in retrospect kind of girl because i when i'm nervous i cannot be in the moment like i am just surviving the moment I'm very clear um an hour after or maybe when my you know I have my faculties about me again but if I'm just
Starting point is 01:21:55 like I'll always there's usually that's why I'm a an apology person it's always you're going to get a text later and it's going to be a very clear retro you know in retrospect text um so i don't behave and my most authentic self kind of default to a playbook that right more comfortable because it's a survival play yes but there are ways uh that there isn't anybody who is going to be able to change or fix that if it's even something that's to be fixed but there are ways and, if it's even something that's to be fixed. But there are ways and there are types of energies and communication to where when, if we're talking and you are that way, and I recognize that either by just getting to know you or you at least having the skill set of being able to say, hey, I just want
Starting point is 01:22:37 to let you know I'm a little triggered and I'm a little out of it right now or whatever, to know that things are different. Where you could just like... Bored. Really? Should we stop? to know that things are different where you could just like... Bored. Really? Should we stop? Where you could be like,
Starting point is 01:22:53 you could be like, what's going on? And get someone back to present. What are you so nervous about? Oh, that makes me nervous. Being like, even saying, oh, what are you so nervous about?
Starting point is 01:23:04 I didn't mean it so judgmental. I'm you so nervous about I have to explain myself now I just can we just get through this I'm just surviving and I'm here and we'll figure it out and I'll explain all my weird little over blinking later yeah that's fine I absolutely do you want to watch Shark Tank do I want to watch Shark Tank yeah together are you guys on a date right now I'm saying like, yeah. Am I still her dad? Are we doing this?
Starting point is 01:23:28 What are you doing? I don't know why I keep looking at you and wanting to undress and I don't think it's a sexual thing. I gotta tell you something. Please tell me it's not. Please, I need that to not be sexual. Only for you.
Starting point is 01:23:40 Is something wrong with your jaw? No. Do you have a jaw? What's going on with that egg? Eggster, we should call you. Easter Eggster. You're doing all right financially, right? Are you going to get your teeth fixed?
Starting point is 01:23:53 What's going on? I had to put my sunglasses back on. I think we are. It looks like you have a big tooth. Thank you. Wait, I know somebody with a big tooth. Good. And you should. there um there is
Starting point is 01:24:09 uh my friend's sister um has talking about had had a very very big gap in her tooth and instead of putting um instead of getting braces the gap was big enough they put in a fake tooth she put she opted i don't know if it's in a comedic way or just out of like pure I think function she put just one tooth
Starting point is 01:24:31 in the middle of her gap and I think it's fucking both genius and hilarious because it's like oh she has a front chomper now it just looks a little strange
Starting point is 01:24:40 right but so I think really the color of your tongue and the way it splits uh-huh it looks like you're both dehydrated and probably an idiot that's just a geographical tongue really i'm here to defend us sir look at her tongue look closely at that tongue it's just a healthy tongue yeah we all have different types of is yours too i scraped this morning let me see yours i don't
Starting point is 01:24:59 show i don't only show my tongue on patreon um we are out of time, which is just too bad. I do advise that you girls put on headphones for your next podcast. Why? It's off. What are you talking about? You would understand if you put your headphones on. Can you explain it? Yeah, there are certain times where we talk over each other,
Starting point is 01:25:20 and I'll be the first to say it. I do it all the time, and I talk a lot. But with the headphones, and you don't have to stop talking, but you're missing stuff. There do it all the time and I talk a lot. But with the headphone, and you don't have to stop talking, but you're missing stuff. There's things you're not hearing while you're talking. And not that those things aren't necessarily important,
Starting point is 01:25:32 but it's information that you're missing. And it can make you, and again, I do mean this in a shitty way, it will make you quicker and I think you could use that. Thank you. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:25:40 I actually don't think I missed anything, but I'm open to being wrong. You were so funny last night. Thank you. Yeah. I will. I will. I actually don't think I missed anything, but I'm open to I'm open to being wrong. You were so funny last night. Thank you. Yeah. Rick, we've really missed you. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:25:53 Me personally. I really, really I I realize I don't like I don't realize how much I miss you until I see you again. What is it that reminds you? Seeing you. Seeing you. Seeing you, yeah. Just seeing me. It's not like an energy. It's just like, oh, right, that guy.
Starting point is 01:26:09 I enjoy this guy's company. Yeah, but you really are, yeah. Like when I'm away from you, I definitely don't want to be seeing you. Honestly, I said this to my girlfriend. I said, I don't really think that Esther is my arch nemesis. I do think she's shaped like an arch nemesis.
Starting point is 01:26:25 However, she's a girl that I know that I no longer trust because I find her to be selfish and very involved with money. However, when I see her- By the way, projecting. I'm not going to get into the facts, but not projecting. I see you and I am reminded, and it's not that I don't believe it, but I am reminded like,
Starting point is 01:26:45 it's almost always a don't believe it, but I am reminded like, I have, it's almost always a good time. Yeah. I almost always, because no matter how disgusting you are or how quick-witted I am, we find a way for me to be funny and you to laugh at it.
Starting point is 01:26:57 And I just think that's really important for my self-worth. No, but jokes aside, I saw you, I hadn't seen you in however long. The music, I just know you're down. We did the spin. We did the thing.
Starting point is 01:27:08 You're into it. I'm into it. It's very easy. Yes. So I don't forget with you. I always enjoy your company. Thank you, Ray. But this, this.
Starting point is 01:27:18 Right. It's like one. It works. It works. It really works. It does. And this works. And I'm glad that we were able to do this.
Starting point is 01:27:26 Thank you. We appreciate it. Absolutely. The first appearance I had, it was a different energy from all of us. It was highly sexual. We were, well. This time you're just talking about what kind of dicks you guys like. No, this was almost zero sexual.
Starting point is 01:27:43 Great. But to me, it wasn't the sexual energy That was different Really Because we were in lingerie Rick It's so funny That you even remember I have no memory
Starting point is 01:27:51 Of what happened I remember the I remember the It was more That was more common With this is This is I think we're all
Starting point is 01:27:58 In a new space None of us have pooped You pooped a lot Or not enough Not enough Right I haven't pooped Since I think
Starting point is 01:28:03 The last Trash Tuesday So This was lower But it was it was nice but it was nice but i think i think next time we should all poop before the pod that's fine well you wanted to do it at 11 a.m so which thank you for i have a day i have a day totally i'm just saying i normally don't like to because i need to poop before too i understand so plug by the way um part of our day we did color me mine and we didn't finish so we're gonna go and finish that's adorable yeah all right really good well wait couples do that i love sweet but the new couple new couples do that i love doing things like that no i love it too so why don't you can i come with yeah do you want to meet us there? I can't today, but...
Starting point is 01:28:46 Do you want me to come back? Yeah. I'll stay longer. When do you want to go? You want to go to Color Me Mine with me and my girl? I would love to. Probably when she's in LA, let's all go. Would you like to come?
Starting point is 01:28:57 Not today. I meant in LA. Oh, yeah. There's one right by me. Do you think we could get them to sponsor the episode and we could film it there? I don't know, but it's interesting that you're interested in getting a sponsor.
Starting point is 01:29:09 It seems like you projected something earlier a few moments ago about me. Oh, I won't argue. I can see you're being really defensive about that and that matters to you. No, yeah, this is part of the business where you try to film in full places. I love that about you,
Starting point is 01:29:19 you being about your bag. Thank you. It's my favorite thing about you. That's why her and I can go on and on and on about just, you know, mogul's my favorite thing about you. That's why her and I can go on and on and on about just, you know, mogul ideas. Rick,
Starting point is 01:29:28 thank you so much. I had such a good time. I loved it. Thank you, Ricky. You are so awesome. You are here today. Mr. Schwarzenegger,
Starting point is 01:29:37 I want to say thank you for having me. We could call this episode instead of part two, T2, and have the thumbnail be you and put a red light in your glasses. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:29:47 Yeah, so I guess if there's anything else here to plug, it would be Color Me Mine. And Esther. And thank you again. All right. Oh, do you normally close on like a big laugh? No. Esther, do your half Jewish, half... Regular.
Starting point is 01:30:04 Yeah, do that joke. We'll see you guys next week with a brand new episode. And that's all for now. Thanks, guys. Thanks, Rick. For all the times you stood by me. For all the truths that you let me see. For all the joy you brought to my life.
Starting point is 01:30:22 For all the wrongs that you made right. For every dream you made me see. For all the dreams inside of me. You're everything I am because you love me. Title card. title card

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.