Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Two Bullies & A Baby w/ Bonnie McFarlane

Episode Date: July 19, 2022

Thank you to our Sponsors: BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at https://betterhelp.com/trashtuesdaySakara - Get 20% off your first order when they go to https://sakara.com/trashtuesday or enter code TRASHTUESDAY at checkout Subscribe! https://bit.ly/HitOurButtonsOfficial Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/2QDAi8XTrash Tuesday Podcast iTunes Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TrashTuesdayPodTrash Tuesday Podcast Spotify Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TTPodAudioTrash Tuesday Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday 0:00 Bonnie McFarlane Joins Us!5:02 Dating Comics & The Fun of Being a Bully8:29 Texas Annie’s Special Prop12:20 When Esther’s Dad Proposed Lesbianism15:34 Sustaining a Long Term Relationship17:07 Pete Davidson Dating History Before Kim Kardashian23:59 Bonnie McFarlane on Being a Parent 29:40 Benefits of Hypnotism 32:07 The High From a Painful Bikini Wax36:15 Being Boyish & The Glow Up44:55 Vabbing & Acidic Discharge52:10 Self Worth & Therapy Jeff1:00:57 Carlos and Annie Fight  Watch the Trash Tuesday's other Podcasts:TigerBelly - http://youtube.com/tigerbellyMeanspiration - https://www.youtube.com/annieledermanEsther Club - https://www.youtube.com/EstherClub Follow Us: Khalyla Kuhn - https://www.instagram.com/khalamitykAnnie Lederman - https://www.instagram.com/annieledermanEsther Povitsky - https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster Theme Song Written by: Bobby Lee http://instagram.com/bobbyleeliveBanana Break Song by: Can Nguyen  🍬  https://www.candyedits.comVisuals and Graphics by: Andre Strauss https://andre-strauss.info Produced by: George Kimmel & Bryce Hallock - 7EQUISPodcast Producers: Pete Forthun & Carlos HerreraEditor: Andres Rosende This Video Contains Paid Advertising.

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offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just $15 a month, go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. That's mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month at mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three-month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes. On unlimited plan, additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. Big details big thanks to our sponsor better help easy and affordable online therapy get 10 off your first month at betterhelp.com slash trash tuesday that's better h-e-l-p.com slash trash tuesday for a 10 off we're so excited about our new sponsor sakara you guys they're nutritionally designed chef crafted breakfasts lunches and dinners are made with powerful plant-rich ingredients and sakara is offering our listeners 20 off their first order when they go to sakara.com slash trash tuesday or enter code trash tuesday at checkout hi you guys i'm back on the road and i'm going to be in dc austin and other places.

You can get tickets at Esther on Ice dot com. Well, howdy who, Austin, Texas. I'm coming straight to you to the Vulcan Gas Company on July 29th. Two shows, one night only. Get your mother effing tickets before they sell out. You see how I caught myself? See how I caught myself? And that's what you're going to see on the show. Just me catching myself. No, it's going to be the best. Get your tickets. It's going to be so fun. I can't wait to come to Austin. You can then see me after that. I'll be in Springfield, Missouri. I'll be in Pittsburgh. I'll be in Tempe. I'll be at the Coluso Casino in Coluso, California. I'll be in Kansas City,

Missouri. I'll be in Irvine, San Jose, Michigan, and Florida. Go to Annie Letterman dot com slash shows to get tickets. Are you a shopaholic like Annie Letterman? Are you a shopaholic? That's such a fun question. She's a weedaholic. That's such a girly question. Do you love shopping? I like it's very new to me.

Like, caring about how I look. Oh, this is you caring? No, I just got to get a level. All it took was 5,000 YouTube comments to make her. No, I think your look is so cute. No, this is so much caring. No, you should have seen her even like a year ago. Annie had the famous thing, which you always said that when I did my sets at the comedy

store, it looked like I had just gotten out of bed. That sounds so much nicer than what I said. There's no way I said it like that. Yeah, you know what you look like? I think I told you you look like an aborted or a miscarried fetus. That was recently, yeah. That's not my fashion, though. That's my aura.

No, your vibe is. That's your core. Esther. Okay, so a little background on Esther. Esther has many family members that were supposed to be aborted. Oh, what? Supposed to be aborted. Like, how do you.

You have two. Like, your mom just goes around. You're not supposed to be here. No, they're like. There's just. There's a lot of, lot of early young pregnancies. I'm half very white trash. So people just get pregnant. I think you're all or none.

I don't know. I don't know if white trash. I think it literally kills whatever else is in there. Jewish? Jewish don't die. If you're white trash, it will destroy your Jewishness. You think? No, please don't say that. I try to crawl out of white trash, it will destroy your Jewishness. You think? It will bring you down.

No, please don't say that. Please. I try to crawl out of white trashness my whole life. I say to my husband is like, he's so consumed with being white trash. It's his every move in life, you know? And I'm always like, we got to get out of this. Her husband has been chewing Nicorette for 16 years. Yeah. Yeah. like that's pretty garbage

yeah it's like not supposed to go that way no you're supposed to write yeah from what i assume so you're married to a stand-up comedian yes you are both stand-up comedians yes we're better than you sorry it is just is what it is no esther went smart esther got engaged to a writer a comedy writer but he doesn't he's not a fan of hers, so she never gets the part. She gets like one-liners here and there. Oh, my God. But she really had an angle. She really had a good angle.

I really tried. No, my thing was like I don't want to – I was not attracted to men that wanted to be on camera, but I wanted someone that would still understand what we do. Yeah, I think that's right. So writer was like the target. The lowest thing you could go no she went pretty low well bonnie was the one i went to the independent spirit awards oh my god she goes i go before her i got there before they were still like finishing up no can i just tell a little bit okay so i was the head writer of the

independent spirit awards so i thought we i was a total in for the party i called somebody and and they were like oh i don't know if we can get you on the list i was like what i wrote it you know yeah and then uh he was like well say you're a writer so then i call you know just say you're a writer when you get to the door and then i told annie to say she was a writer which in looking back is so funny that i would make her have to say something so horrific to get into a party they would give a fucking shit about the writer see i had no idea i was still like living this belief that i was important in some way to that she also dressed like a writer like she had like a i had to work that day like two backpacks on when she went to the party there is actually something i'm very curious to ask you about which is that you are one of the rare people in showbiz

who's in like a what could possibly be coming a very long-term successful relationship well i don't know about successful but yeah we, we're hanging in there. We got separate bedrooms. Is that true? Yes. Isn't that amazing? Yeah. It is a life changer. I still have to fuck him.

But does he come to your room to get fucked or do you go to his? I go to his room. So you know what's going to happen when you go to his room. It's like... Yeah, that's where the lube is.

If you're at a festival and you go to a man's room, you know what's going to happen. Yes, yes. Well, I got drunk the other night and we went back to the hotel and I was, you know, trying. I was like, oh, let me give you a blowjob. These knees haven't seen the concrete in a while. And it was outside on the sidewalk

yeah it was before they got back to their I can only do it if people are watching but no he was like no go to bed

are you serious yeah well he's Rich is sober so he was like he's grossed out my drunk wife yes

how dare you she was very flirty though whoa she was drunk she was drunk at the comedy store she was like when i get drunk i go like hi hi you it was cute so embarrassing did you see anyone you banged back in the day at the comedy store i mean there's been so many did you date other comics besides rich yes i only dated con i just don't understand dating outside of your field i don't agree with that that's like yeah like what are you gonna talk about you're gonna talk about your own set

and your husband is in sleep apnea and you're gonna just talk about that all the time well you would like that that's what you get for you yeah that's how you're like my husband sells the machines so when you're on a plane she was telling me on a plane she i died i i can diagnose people on planes if they're have sleep apnea i do it with autism i was doing it last night you're like i noticed you weren't looking me i go you're looking like a little past me shifty yeah this kid has autism and it's i look everyone's on their journey but i'm like i could save you a little time i i'm not breaking hippo violations here i'm just letting you know that

if you were to go get tested they will tell you ding ding ding you're on the spectrum but by that point i mean that guy had to have already he had to go to a special school and he's he can't be in regular society no no it was like special school but we had fun bullying him and um you know this is the thing about bullying i feel like honestly people you never you never get that like the opposite side like the feel goodness of being a bully you know what i mean like i left there with a little bounce in my step honestly i identify as a bully and i feel like we're being discriminated against. We're being silenced.

Interesting. I don't have much to add to that. You better not. You have so much to add a bully, Esther. Don't ever say that. Don't ever sell yourself. Don't ever sell yourself 4'11". Sorry.

No, Esther's the best to be bullied i do i do appreciate because it's like not bullied but i think like a playful yes a playful nagging oh wait i have to show you guys so i have i'm doing my set in texas i have my show on the 29th so i'm pandering to the texas audience so everyone comes to the vault nailing it on the 29th so I'm pandering to the Texas audience so everyone comes to the Vulcan on the 29th do you start by singing the Star Spangled Banner I do I get my gun out I shoot a fetus I shoot a doctor

who's trying to kill the fetus and then I accidentally shot the fetus but they forgive you yes the gun's more than the fetus the gun is higher than the fetus I save the fetus but they forgive you yes they like the guns more than the fetus right in the 60s so then the gun is higher than the fetus i saved the fetus with prayer and then um but okay so i got more but you know the gun that i want to use to pander i brought here oh my god my God. I filled it with oat milk. Do not, please. Do not.

I'm a vegan. I filled it with oat milk. I'm. Are you a little tempted? She's thirsty. I'm okay on this. Please don't spray me. I'm not going to spray you.

Okay. But if you open your mouth, I will give you a little lick. I'll give you a little drippy. It's so funny because every. This is chlamydia. Every once in a while like dave will be uh what's it called watering plants and i won't spray you you're so scared i'm so scared is that what people call it and he'll be like what would happen if i just sprayed because everyone knows

a divorce like dave when dave sprays you it's because he's trying to get you to break up with him that's a good thing i should be here. We're all there with you. For some reason, we're like, why is everyone here? It does look like cum. Like on the table, there's like two driblets. Wait, will you drink some? Yeah. Come here.

Carlos. Carlos, how bad do you want to be a part of this goddamn show? I'm on the show. I'm on the show. That's what I'm saying. How bad do you want to be a part of it? All right. You could very easily not be on it. All right. Down it all right down down is this going to get us demonetized

wait hold on i'm wearing the selenes this is so it's like the least gay thing you've done honestly but i'm so sorry to tell you. I'm diagnosing you with autism. What is happening? I like that it's like... Oh, I got his eye. She didn't even try to get me in the mouth. I did, but I'm not facing you.

It's hard to have... It's a expensive shirt. You can buy another one, you rich piece of shit. Carlos' parents are rich. Bonnie is down. It's oat milk, because I can't do it with real vegans, so I don't swallow. Can you not do it with Connie?

No, I won't do it. I'm trying to save the planet. Let's just say I'm not a vegan. I like to keep my children inside me. Yes, yes. Why does oat milk taste like the full cereal? inside me. Yes, yes. Why does oat milk taste like the full cereal? It tastes like a full cereal. It's got sugar in it. Yeah.

It has sugar in it? Mm-hmm. I kill myself. What? Carlos kills you? Carlos, there's sugar in that. Is that why you miss it? There's also a gun next to you, to a gun lighter.

I know, I love the gun lighter. I always forget about it. Yeah. Here's yourdy annie howdy kids do you know what oat milk is kids this is circle time um no hats are so annoying wait i want circle time i was do you know i was a nursery school teacher i Wait, what job have you not done? No, I do sound like a pathological liar because I had a... Because you're a pathological liar. That's the only thing you've ever told us is true. Remember when you told me I was a sociopath? Wait, what?

Bonnie and I had a weird week of our friendship. Tell me everything. I didn't say it in anger. I said it with like respect. I was like, you're going to make it because you're a sociopath. And I went, hmm. I just want to say I was censored by the men. But the gun gun is better than

the penis gun. Three women were just censored by one and a half men. Okay? They are not letting me have my weapon, my self-defense weapon. But if you say I'm gay, then you're saying gay people are half men. I never said you were gay. Okay. I just said maybe you should consider

it being gay if you were it's not a choice you're born that way well you know what's crazy is when i was little my dad sat me and my sister down at the time started making out with a guy he just started tonguing down a dude it was so weird and he said don't worry it's oat milk he literally was like i would like both of you to consider to seriously consider lesbianism wait how old are you no no sorry kalilah's not here i just wanted to bring a little kalilah no no but now i look back and i'm like what was that moment was it a? Was it a tease of me? Because they used to make fun of me that I would download naked pictures of girls. Like, I don't know what that really was about.

Why? He didn't know about that. No, they did. They all knew behind my back. But then why was he telling you to try lesbianism? That's what I'm trying. You already were trying. That's what I'm figuring out in my live real time.

You've been trying lesbianism for a long time. To the point where it goes. it's not really the trial yeah it's like let's get rid of this guy why is there this guy here there's just this pesky man in your life yeah because there's the the right like you're basically just you're it's not that you're straight you're just still like to have the patriotic approve you yeah yes i want to be oh she wants to eat pussy but she wants guys to want to eat her pussy yes yes that's the dream guys we figured it out that's our new name we eat pussy but we want you to eat our want to eat our pussies it's like a little the podcast very short name it's such a good name now are we getting blood bath back annie i have a really important question

um i i got a dm from uh nicole the pole who i told you guys about oh nicole the pole is a pole i want to call an artist she's a pole artist okay okay she's number one her shoulders are bigger i was thinking like polish yeah she's a polish you are white trash i like those sausages she thought i was about to do like a joke about how they don't know how to tie their shoes or something wait but wait bonnie where did you grow up alberta canada what yeah she's a farm girl. Yeah. I have a book. It's called You're Better Than Me, and you can find out all about my childhood. Really? Yes.

Esther will read it. She's a fan. I will. No, I'm like. She's a fan girl. I have like a thing with female comedians. Like I get like. Do you see how her.

You want us to want to eat your pussy? Her heel is like in her vagina. You see that? Oh, look look there's someone oh look at that bonnie mcfarland you're better look at that kid i'm also the girl right below it um look at that what's that what the hell is that why did that show up for yours i that's me i don't know oh my god i do want to know more about like sustaining a long-term relationship because I feel like you know what it is it's just don't break up right it's literally accept everything you know

the thing is like obviously Rich is one of the most annoying people on the planet yeah and but he's not a compulsive gambler he says he's not drugs he's not like do you know what I mean like it's like it's like there's certain things that would throw you off the path Do you know what I mean Like it's like Sorry Esther It's not looking good for you It's like there's certain things That would throw you off the path Yes Right That's true Like drug addict

Alcoholic It's like But what is your advice For not getting broken up with Oh I don't know I mean I just married someone Who could never do any better So

That's what Esther did Esther's whole stand up special Was about that pretty much Was it really I don't even remember a lot of it was like you would see Dave like laughing but also kind of like but I do think that's good advice to go for someone who you know can't do better than you well I think like most guys get there anyway because I think honestly most guys are codependent

so unless they meet someone else you're kind of good do you know what i mean like they'll leave you for someone else i will tell you though even though we think we're finding people that can't do better than us when you do release the guy that you pulled up yeah and brought up to your level girls saw you with them and then they start getting a caliber of girls that was never in their realm of possibility right and they might not be better than you if you have the right self-esteem no one's is better than you right but but they can get pretty close like they're not going back to what they were dating before you that's interesting like is that almost like pete davidson dating ariana grande yes yes the flood right right but no i think it was um first he dated um what's the woman matt rife dated too? Kate Beckinsale.

Was that before Ariana? Yeah. No way. No. I think it was right after. And then before that it was Larry David's daughter. Oh it was after

never mind. Oh yeah. Kazzy. She's cute too. Yeah so that's like yeah that's an interesting theory. I heard he's been eyeing up Oprah.

He DM'd or he texted me about a friend of mine once. he texted me about a friend of mine once. He texted me about a friend of mine, and he was like, and I knew it because he had Carly ask me. Carly called me and was like, that's Carly. He had to say, she's married to Rich Voss. And I go, she's, listen, she's not quitting.

She said one thing about her relationship. She's not going to break up. Annie, you were right. Cassie David came before Ariana Grande. Wait, it was Cassie? No, she said Kate thing about her relationship she's not gonna break up so yeah annie you were right cassie david came before ariana grande wait it was cassie but what about kate beckinsale that's after ariana there's beckinsale who's he gonna go to after kim there's nowhere to go after kim that's what i'm saying except for kylie right yeah yeah kylie would make more sense than kim to me well age wise she dated this girl you know i so i obviously sorry i worship kim kardashian like in my private time please let respect my privacy um like please i don't bring that here but just um you bring it here

so much she's always like do you know what I saw on TikTok? Kim Kardashian. That's always the sentence. But like, so it's hard for me when I see the pictures she's posting of her and Pete. I'm like, when I met, when we all met Pete, he was a child. He was 15. So I see him as a little boy and I'm like, what am I looking at? This is so weird.

This is like when I go back to visit Todd's family and his mom tries to show me like pictures of him from like four years ago. I was renting cars legally. He loved these pajamas. I was renting cars and living in the rental car while this boy was getting his first bike. It's like, I can't look. I do have that experience with people I follow on, like cool girls I follow on TikTok where I'm like, oh, these are like my peers.

And then like they, so this is me three years ago and they're little kids. Yeah. This is weird. Am I going to jail? You look little, so you can sneak in. Thank you. Oh my God.

We should do a, okay. I already want to, I'm putting this out into the universe. If there's any comedy writers that want to like that like writing things that want to like take anything well i think we should do twins remake yes okay where she's can i see you guys standing next to each other i just want to see the poster oh my god i love it i love it you have tall blonde pretty girl privilege like it is so a crazy thing that you have and i also look like all of the popular boys in middle school so i had like silver chair privilege but it's almost like you made yourself like the way you behave to like you wanted to equal the playing field yeah well my brother was slower than me you know no um i looked like shit and you know you don't grow into your although i saw you on facetime

last week without makeup and i was like she's pretty stunning without makeup were you masturbating i just i really thought a joke was coming i was like yeah just up out of the swamps i see no you must be new to the show the people that are still expecting a joke to come out of my mouth oh this is gonna be me no esther will like set a thing up and then she'll look at me and i'm like that's right girl i love that well she took the beat she was like and then you even did like the little smile like, oh, it's gonna be bad. You're like, you're hot. And this is when she figured out she was a squirter.

How do you have like sex advice? Like for I feel like I've been wanting to talk about long term relationships, but then literally Kalilah and Bobby broke up. So I'm like now we have i have yeah ask me ask me anything well kalilah can give us advice on long-term relationships that's true at 10 years dip stay but stay but stay but stay kalilah right now is going with bobby to get ketamine treatment. Oh. Right now, that's where she is. Yeah.

Right now, Kalilah's in a K-hole. She's like, is this me or the clouds? Do you think she's thinking of us? Listen, Esther, it's not a good thing if she's thinking of us. It's really bad. Bonnie better not be in my chair. Now, a word from our sponsor,

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we are not immune to days of feeling down, days of feeling anxious. Well, no, I have a question. Let me just say, one time I facetimed

kalilah and she just said we're all just broken people trying to keep it together and we are and we are well i have a question how well would you take care of your car if it was the only one you had your whole life and that is weird coming from me because i have only had one car my whole life and you did not take good care of it even a a little bit. But your brain is, you have just one the whole time you're here and you should take care of it. And you can by using BetterHelp. BetterHelp is easy and affordable online therapy. I swear by therapy, it has been an indispensable part of my life. They have this really cool journal feature where I get to write down my thoughts during the week in between therapy sessions. You can start talking to a counselor in just under 48 hours. And if it's not a match,

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the bigger goal of improving your life and our listeners get 10 off their first month at betterhelp.com slash trash tuesday that's better h-e-l-p.com slash trash tuesday after years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time, all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan, I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one. Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople.

Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel. George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls. And the fact that not a single call is ever dropped. And you can use your own phone with any Mint Mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts. Say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at 15 bucks a month

and all plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. That is such a steal. To get this new customer offer and your new three-month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. That's mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month at mintmobile.com slash Tuesday. $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three-month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan. additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers,

if we've learned anything, it's that there's always a catch. So when I heard that for a limited time, all Mint Mobile wireless plans are $15 a month when you purchase a three-month plan. I thought, where's the catch? But after talking to them, it all made sense. There isn't one. Mint Mobile's secret sauce is that they sell wireless services online. They don't have retail stores or salespeople. Instead, they deliver premium phone plans directly to you. As you guys know, our friend Rick Glassman, he uses Mint Mobile. I learned about Mint Mobile through George Kimmel. George is a busy guy. He takes the most business calls and

the fact that not a single call is ever dropped and you can use your own phone with any mint mobile plan and bring your phone number along with all of your existing contacts say goodbye to your overpriced wireless plans mint mobile is here to rescue you with plans starting at 15 bucks a month and all plans come with high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5g network that is such a steal to get this new customer offer and your new three month unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month go to mintmobile.com slash tuesday that's mintmobile.com slash tuesday cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com slash tuesday 45 up front payment required equivalent to 15 a month new customers on first

three month plan only speed slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan additional taxes fees and restrictions apply statement mobile for details do you guys ever engage or dabble in like role play or like spicing things up well we have definitely tried but he's um he's incorrigible no we just it's becomes too laughy yeah okay you're both too silly yeah yeah i mean he's ridiculous really that does he chew nicorette when you guys have sex i mean i sometimes have to remind him to take it out. I swear to God. Because I don't know if you know this, but when you chew Nicorette, they put it in their top lip. They just leave it there.

So they can, I don't know why that happens. Get more of the juice. They're not just chewing it all the time. They're just letting it seep out through the top lip. So as soon as he forgets it, it's there. And then I'm like, what is, why is my pussy stuck together yeah you're like why is that actually happened to me my ex-boyfriend was chewing big red stop i swear on my life he was chewing big red that's what she calls her pussy i call it that one week a month bonnie

the rest of the time i just call it big but after the character big because it's you know a child no no no not from the show big that's so funny yes from the movie big it's it's named after tom hanks's character because i like to think it's in a child's body it doesn't have hair yeah i never grew hair wait okay i have another question because you have a child yeah which is like oh shit huge deal she's a mom like not for saying oh yeah you're not a mom like i'm kidding i didn't even know that what until a couple weeks ago you brought that up well i just saw one i never heard that term i don't want to be judgy because everyone picks

their path and everything but there were these comedians that were coming after this used to happen all the time at the comedy store they would post like the lineup and then these like you know usually there were like older female comedians that weren't like i've never met they haven't been around in a while right well oh were they taking care of their children they're probably taking care of maybe your children i've never seen you with your daughter um you seem to make it well i just don't have one i just never seen you with her well we can tell you have a kid because you're wearing her clothes but um she would cry if she heard you say that she'd be like i would never her daughter's getting to like uh like slutty clothes age wait really yeah well i mean she's either wearing like an oversized t-shirt where

it looks like she's not wearing any pants i'm'm always like, can you just like tuck it in a little on the sides? She goes, people know I'm wearing shorts under here. But it does seem like we're, you know. They're checking to see if the problem. I feel like I've had that exact conversation with Dave. Like, he's like, it looks like you're not, it looks like a mistake. You're like, I'm sorry, I got a toddler too. I thought it would be short enough that you could see my shorts.

You're like, I'm sorry, I got a toddler too. I thought it would be short enough for you to see my shorts. Now, okay, so last week on our episode, we decided that we were going to have self-worth summer. We all need to build up our self-worth. And I feel like since you have a child who's entering slutty clothes age, how would you advise maybe two other young ladies? Slutty clothed girls.

To have like self-worth. Like, do you have any, how do you build up self-worth? Well, first of all, my daughter's 14. Her OnlyFans is off the chain. So she's getting a lot of, a lot of financial.

You're her Kris Jenner. Do you get, have you got the sex tape ready? Yeah, yeah, yeah. For the moment, you have your own countdown for when she turns 18? Oh, she's going to have a baby. I mean, it's going to be a whole thing.

This is the thing. It's like I used to take her with me. So, like, having a child is not as hard as people make it out to be, first of all. It's not. Only person that was- Shut up. I mean, I do think people try to, oh, my God. Like, I did, you know, there's times where you can't sleep as much and obviously,

you know, but we used to lay in bed together and drink coffee when she was little. Like, it's not like you gave her coffee. I mean, I didn't, are you a bad mom or a good mom? No,

I'm a good mom, but she, she wasn't drinking coffee. I was trying to think of a joke, but, um, she doesn't, it,

it, no, it, it fucks her heroin, but it, um, no no she is like super cool super fun i when she was a baby i went like this i swear to god i was like to the heavens i go please give me a 10 p.m to 10 a.m baby and then she just started going to bed at 10 p.m and waking up at 10 a.m and then people would be livid like when they found out well i remember uh

that somebody came over and i was up and reina was still sleeping she was like get that baby up she's like i thought it was like reina was dead or something but then at the parks and stuff you'd have to people be like, well, time for lunch. And I'd be like, oh, yeah, us too. You know, meanwhile. It was breakfast. Just had breakfast. Yeah. It's like you have to lie a lot as a parent.

That's the other thing. Do you feel like. There is like a lot of lying. I mean, it's like because there's like I just don't engage that much in a lot of the like mom shit that goes on. Like her getting her period and stuff. You just. She is friends with someone who has two moms, both gynecologists.

And every day I go, I hope you get it at their house. Please, God. Let them show you how to put a tampon in. You should put blood in her underwear before she goes over. You're the mom we need to hear from. This is so exciting esther i want to

tell you something guess who i talk to every day her yeah inspiration wow guess what else she does i'm outing you what guess what else she does mary lou rodriguez hypnotism she does hypnotism i don't i don't care what she's not i do i'm out of here I started doing hypnosis years and years and years and years ago she started actually I forgot to say Bonnie started hypnosis wait so what is your experience with it it's just it's a magic pill why can you like I don't know it just like I read years and years ago I would switch I was living in Los Angeles I would come and stay at this guy's place in New York and he would stay at my place in LA, and I would read all his books. And he had all these books on hypnosis for some reason.

Was he trying to bang you? No. Did you ever use one of his things as a yoniag? I don't know what you're talking about. You're getting sleepy. I don't know if those are pendulum. No. You never put it in your pussy and squeezed it?

Yes, of course. You never keegled on it? Yes, yes. I've've only keegled twice but that was one of the times um so then i just started doing it and it was it's literally like magic it's like a weird thing that happens and this one had all different like this one, the hypnosis that I first started doing was way different than the hypnosis that I do now. But it was like, I don't know, you just put in to your head. So it would say like, like one of the things was like, and you imagine there you have a big pot, your head is a big pot, and you put in the stuff that you want, like confidence, now stir it around, see the words going in, you know, it was like this whole thing and then um i don't know it just worked i like that guy like what did he learn when he stayed in your house no i know he was like how

to garden like what bullshit books did you have how to garden in 20 minutes how to garden with a kid in your arms what's interesting to me is that sounds very similar to an exercise i did in therapy like that i never would have considered hypnosis or called it hypnosis but it's like kind of the same thing. No that wasn't therapy when the witch told you to get in the pot. She turned me into a rat just for the weekend. I

would love to be a rat for a weekend I don't know why. Well we you've been making a play for that for a while. The not showering the greasy hair. It was so fun to be a little rat in a box and like you take me home. Like I feel like I would be. This would be easily done.

This is very easily done. This is a fantasy many people have already thought of. I'll even poke holes in the box. Okay. Are you going to wear one of those furries? I would. No, show her your bush. She doesn't need it. I got a wax yesterday i see yeah

she has like it looks like there should be a penis i was thinking bonnie and i don't do this that like because i have to see it because i have we do a podcast with girl talk like now all these people know my wax schedule when i'm hairy when i'm not what once every 10 years oh you got it all waxed off let me see the bottom part no let me see it i want to see it wide open let me see it i want to see what it looks like for myself we have similar hey late let me let me let's warm up at the end i don't show each other vaginas or anything we've not been that type of friends oh that's like esther and I were like day one. Yeah, no, I'm not that into it.

I like a little distance in my friendships. Sorry. I'm Canadian. We're a little cold. But do you wax and get leave some? If you. I, yeah, I usually live a Dorito. Like a legitimate Dorito.

Yeah, no, I live a Dorito. That a legitimate Dorito. Yeah, no, I live in Dorito. That's your waxer. Cool Ranch. Speaking of rats, I have one in my underwear eating the chip. I did. The wax. They call it twatted tattoo-y. The wax was good for the last minute.

It was so painful. No one wants to hear how painful it was it was so painful i was sweating and afterwards i realized i think i'm addicted to getting bikini waxes because i get high after yes yes that's why people get addicted to tattoos too it's like the pain then you get like your dopamine or whatever you're scared of it yes esther look at her handshake this is so real look at her hands they're quivering are're scared of it. Yes. Esther, look at her handshake. This is so real. Look at her hands. They're quivering. Are you scared

because it's a vagina? Would you be into it? No. Now this stance is so you can spring out of the chair. Why did you change? I know.

When people are pointing things that squirt at me, like I get very uncomfortable. Like I can't podcast. I can't do anything. Is Dave usually trying to podcast me? Does it?

He's like, are we rolling okay he's like oh we're doing the ads the mid-roll okay but wait so people this is i literally feel like i got a free high like i got high without having to do weed i was so high from the intense pain what other things is that why eating hot chips you ever eat talkies that's what you eat peppers eating bugs all of it you face your fears just like feel like i just got figured you out like i understand yes that's all i do is i put myself in painful weird situations so afterwards i can go so after you eat a bug you feel like a high wait are you eating bugs yeah something i don't know yeah on this show you try to mirror her i want to do it too her and kalilah will eat like and they'll eat anything oh yeah it's i know but you're vegan right no i was oh my god for how long

how could someone be a vegan and then go back that's what I don't get she wasn't she was a fucking Netflix vegan she was a Netflix vegan

she saw one documentary she tried to be cool some pretty girl told her she was a vegan okay I was that is all true no a pretty girl Esther and I

used to follow pretty girls around the grocery store to see what was in their cart and then ask them what they did one woman took us

into her apartment and showed us all this food no no in her fridge yeah and what was it vegan food it was weird it was like it was like she had a lot of like she was a she turned out she was self botox yeah oh god she also ended up being her boyfriend's. And this woman was like, I'll just say a big-titted woman. She had big fake tits. I was like, you're his. This is who he sees every eight weeks. I feel like that's some body shaving right there. I'm sorry.

She showed us her fake tits like immediately. They were great. Love her. I know. We got to get Kalilah to get fake tits again. We need tits in the crew. We need tits in the crew. We need tits in the crew. Wait, she hates fake tits?

She had them and got them taken out. Oh. But it's like you're single again. That's like the transitioning. Put them back in. It is weird. Yeah, what was it like to grow up as a boy? I grew up.

I did want to be a boy. I wouldn't wear shirts. Really? Do you know that about me? Nobody noticed either. I would only have really short hair. And I remember like playing with these in the, my mom was a teacher. So we went to the school during summer and then there was these kids out there playing

and then I was playing with them and then all day we played. And then when we went inside, I went to go in the girls' bath and they're like, that's the girls. And I was like, oh, I am. No, they used to think I was a boy all the time yeah really yeah it's because i just identified my father i think who had the power in the family you know still does huh so then i was like i definitely was against i was very resistant against like all girly things like my mom always want to put me in a dress i would never allow it but do you think if she didn't want you in a dress you would have liked dresses i think that's totally possible yeah

yeah because i do like them now like for the first time i'm like oh i want to we like you in them too thank you oh my god like sometimes girls up when dave sees me in a dress he like almost will tear up he's like it's like such a big deal to him i still had a glow up let me tell you sometimes i look at our old episodes together i go because i was always dressing up i like that style but it was different no we had a glow up but we both had a glow up but i at least was putting on like a car i was always wearing like a costume that's true you would come in like i it's like a potato rolled into my house and i put it on my show yeah it's weird like i did not care about how i presented myself until like three weeks ago like there's

something and she would always be like let's just do the podcast now and i'm like i have to do at least 20 minutes yeah and i would be like what are you talking about i'm like be camera ready bitch i couldn't believe it i was like just be camera ready i remember your glasses on at least bonnie looked like shit this morning. Do I? Should I take my glasses off? You should do it for a little bit. You look beautiful.

You want to do both? Oh my God, you're hot. She's so hot. Oh my God. She's hot. Wait, you're totally right. I remember being at your apartment and I'd be like, let's start the podcast. And you're like, Esther, like I need.

I'm like, Esther, I need at least 45 minutes to get these eyelashes on. I think this is my dad's fault. I think my dad would like train me that like being ready fast is like a skill because he would always have to wait for my mom and like he'd be annoyed. Do you take less time than Dave? Yeah.

Dave has to like unhook all of his. He just wears it around the house. No, that's like, I feel like that's one of my little mini skill sets i like to brag about is like i can be ready in five minutes to go and do anything right it's so annoying though when you need 10 the five minutes is painful when esther's ready and you're not yeah but like five minutes is like that's the most i can do yeah like i don I don't know what else. Like I can't do eye makeup like that. Yeah, you're weirdly skilled at it. I take it fast.

I go fast, yeah. That's what never makes sense to me about you. It's like why are you good at, how are you good at girly things? I was a baby slut, okay? So my mom did a different thing where she tried to make me a boy. So then I tried being a boy to get her attention

and it actually didn't work. She traded me off the boys' baseball team. I mean, she really was like, no, I didn't mean I like boy. I like people that aren't you, Annie. Right, right. It just was the opposite of you. So then when I realized I wasn't going to get her attention that way, I rebelled against it.

And then I got like really girly and very slutty because I didn't have like a mom who was like feminine to teach me that you don't have to be like a slut to be feminine. I like didn't know. You were just trying to get that attention. Yeah, like I didn't have like a mom who was like feminine to teach me that you don't have to be like a slut to be feminine. I like didn't know. You were just trying to get that attention. Yeah, like I didn't know. So I dressed like a baby slut. But I was always doing my makeup like crazy amounts of makeup in high school and stuff. Yeah, you're very good at it.

And it always is like weird to me. Like, aren't you supposed to be like an ugly comedian? Like we're like. No, we don't do that anymore. Yeah, no, I like that. I'm still doing it i have to say i can't believe we're being sponsored by sakara it's one of my favorite hot girl foods um and i do think that like how you feel starts with how you eat and when i eat sakara i know that I'm in a reset.

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gigabytes on unlimited plan additional additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. Statement mobile for details. We went shopping yesterday and I did the... If you go shopping with me, like anyone, just like heads up, this will happen. I will end up buying the exact same thing as you at some point.

I am codependent. I brought it. You want to show it? Yeah, we both got the same. I'm going to put it on. We should wear that for our stand-up class. This is the Voss part of Bonnie Voss. Isn't it cool?

Oh, that is cool. Where do I, which camera? Pop the ass a little. I like it. That is, and you got it too? Yeah. Wait, what is, can we see this video yeah this girl julia yeah your uh headphones are all underneath thank you kind sir that was like the most respect carl's has ever been treated with no this sweatshirt was respect i'm bringing you

the dirty one too yes i could probably clean it. I feel like you should get your OG back as well. Yeah, someone said you big-timed me by not giving it back to me. Listen, I borrowed, okay, I borrowed, we went on a hike. Our friend, you know Brody,

Brody had just died. There was this really cool hoodie of Brody, so he lent me Brody's hoodie to go on a hike. And then I fucking, like, stained it, and it was so shitty.

Oh my God. And so I didn't give it back to him because I was like, I had plans. When you have AD there i i have been cleaning that hoodie in my head technically for three years like it's in a pile of like fix this i i have that pile too and i i don't want to say i don't big time carlos but in this situation it was more of a small timing myself just like you know once you just fuck something up so bad it's like too embarrassing wait i like that to instead of big timing you're small timing yourself i don't know what that means but i it's i feel like i do it but no my whole

life i've done it that's what you do when you like you dim your shine to make everyone else feel feels like stuff you put on your fridge you know know what I mean? Yeah. Don't big time someone else. You're just small timing yourself. Yes. Bonnie's acting like she doesn't send me motivational quotes every day. I love motivational quotes. Oh, I love it. Okay, those are hot.

Thank you. Love it. Who makes those? I don't know. Oh, Gatekeeper. Okay, so Vabbing. What is this? All right, this is Julia on TikTok. Does she have vabbing. What is this? I'm sorry.

This is Julia on TikTok. Does she have jizz coming out of her mouth? No. Who needs to hear this, but vabbing works. Vabbing 100% works. Works to do what? Let's see the guy she worked with. I got offered two free drinks at the pool,

and then a guy literally came back and gave me this. Like, what? Because he wants you to not smell bad. He gave her perfume. He gave her? Because he wants you to not smell bad. He gave her perfume. He gave her perfume to cover up your fucking tuna smell. He's like, you smell like ass. She's excited that the vabbing is working on men. Believe me.

Well, a gynecologist does have a rebuttal to vabbing. Okay. You know what I'm going to say, right? Forget the science for a second. If someone is only interested in you because you smell like meow meow juice, do you really want anything to do with that person if the rest of you as you are is not enough to make them attracted to you and as my friend dr jen gunter said there's no evidence that human pheromones exist or that this works uh there's

evidence have you seen how ugly my emotions so if you want to do this and it's not hurting anybody else then feel free i'm a big fan of bodily autonomy as you know but obviously i don't think that you need to do this you know what i want to see about of tiktok i want to see people's bloopers how many times they've done yes right oh that's so embarrassing i called it fabbing again can we redo this i keep saying fapping oh okay honestly i feel like i want to turn this on you, Carlos. Like, what is, you're the guy here. Like, what is, what do you think of that?

He's repulsed by the vaginal smell. Like, is that, because I'm down. I don't know. Wait, I'm going to put, I'm going to put Todd's ball smell on me. Oh my God. And see if Carlos tries to lean in for a kiss. Like, I am so down to that. I'll just say it.

I'm down with like dirty stuff like that. So I think, I think it could work for me. Like I feel like the, like the muskiness of a woman, like under like, like armpit smell, like I'm into that.

So I think this would actually like fool me. But not all women. No. The only ones you're attracted to. Only the ones the lizard brain is attracted to yes yeah like the tricking me and i wasn't into you already and you put like your pussy juice all over you i'm not going to be like oh do you want a car or something i mean i just like the idea of like of like like just doing a drive-by like a hitler stash

oh yeah you just go and you just disappear i like that to find you they're on craigslist misconnections you wiped your pussy juice on my lower lip and i've been thinking about you ever since i do love there's something about the concept of like using your body to gross out a guy like i love a good like dip it in and swipe it on them just to be like but then but they like it yeah some of them do but well that's why they don't smell isn't that why they steal underwear and smell well guys that don't that guys that do complain about smell are so annoying it's the most it's a get away from me right a hundred percent get away i can't stand it i had a

boyfriend that was like i have an amazing sense of smell and he was always grossed out about have fun being single for the rest of your smell and he was always grossed out about have fun being single for the rest of your life and he really will be i'm not kidding i think it's a defense mechanism it has to be you're just gonna be grossed out by the smell of everyone around you yeah um i have a question this is vaginal thank you i feel like kalilah would be the one that would be able to answer this so let me let me a shot. There was a time where I started eating a lot of pastries where my vag got like... Pasties or pastries?

Pastries. I was just chowing down. I was leaving a lot of strippers with just bleeding nipples. Oh, God. Oh, God. God damn you. Ring the bell.

Thank you. I was just eating those pepperonis right off the slice. They were babbing their pasties. What could you do? It wasn't my fault. That's how they stick them on. Yeah. But my underwear started to, something got acidic in my discharge and it started bleaching

my underwear. Yeah. Oh, wow. Do you know what I'm talking about? Wow. Whoa. No. Bleaching my underwear.

The bleached flower went through your system leaked out bleached your underwear you never had cleaner underwear than when you were in it was so clean but it would it would tear holes in it it would tear holes in it it would tear holes it would tear holes in it that's so and then i stopped i was like it has to be the pastries because i wasn't eating that type of food i've only used it it in my underwear as starter dough for sourdough bread. Have you ever done that? Well, yeah. Over the pandemic, we all had to bake a couple loaves.

It would rise up in an hour. It was wonderful. That's what Esther's bell is. It means the bread's ready. I will say that sometimes, oh, I can't. Sometimes, I swear it's going to sound like a lie, but it... You're like, sometimes my vagina smells so good that animals come and start eating... No, sometimes it smells like McDonald's french fries.

I know that seems so specific and weird. And that's from you touching it and then smelling it? That's like... Or like you're sitting there and smelling it. Or like when you go to the bathroom and all of a sudden you're like, whoa. Literally, I'll get a whiff and I'll be like, that's like or like you're like when you go to the bathroom i'm like whoa literally i'll get a whiff and i'll be like that's that you don't believe it no i believe you but i don't believe that there isn't like a french fry involved i believe there's i believe you but you believe in the science backing yes i believe that you actually have French fries inside you. An acidic vaginal environment is protective, actually.

It's a good thing. It creates a barrier that prevents unhealthy bacteria and yeast from multiplying too quickly and causing infection. But where does it come from? Why did this happen? It's probably something in the pastry that was creating bacteria in there, and then it turned acidic to protect your pussy. It was burning holes in my underwear.

Yeah, so these are healthy foods for it and none of these are pastries, cranberries, fruits, garlic, things like that. You ate an unhealthy food and your pussy protected your body. Why is garlic good for your body and so bad for your body? I feel like what Carlos just said made no sense. I just talked over it.

I stopped listening to him. When Carlos tries to get all like, I'll tell you how it is i'm like it's because it requires like four seconds of effort and this is the easiest job in the world so just go back to talking about your pussy your job is easy we know carlos you're saying your job's easy wait where is this good on the ph scale or i don't know he doesn't know don't they're not vegan i'm gonna push it the ph scale or i don't know he doesn't know don't they're not vegan i'm gonna push it up my vagina anyway i don't know i know this is very rational

the girls are period i don't care i just pretend i'm killing her and uh i might be telling it wrong but it's a very funny joke. And... I mean, I have a better version of that joke. Anyway, it doesn't matter. It was Whitney being... Like, Rich was just immediately, like, melting. Whitney never tells us when she likes our jokes.

She just starts doing them. And then I'm like, I guess she liked it. Joking. She doesn't. Bonnie, are you disappointed in the amount of jokes I told on this podcast no why okay I was just curious too many I think it's too many they want you to be real Annie

I um okay self tips okay so I'm gonna start doing this and it's it's gonna be difficult in the beginning but I am gonna do the looking in the mirror for one full minute three times falling in love with yourself i love myself i love myself or i love you you have to set an alarm and do it for one full minute and if you don't feel love for

yourself you have to think of something you love like you would have to think of donut or whatever or donuts and just pick a donut her dog's name is Donut. Also, she's like. I like sugar. Yeah. Not anymore. I still like it. I still eat it. But I try to eat less.

Why does it sound like you're eating donut? Anyway, OK. So you think about something you love while you're saying it. So then the feeling of actual love is in your body while you're looking at yourself and saying you love yourself. So you have to say it over and over again. You can say I love myself or I love you into the mirror. For one minute.

Oh, that's the book, right? For one minute, three times a day. Isn't it? There's a book called Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends. Like Your Life Depends on It. Yeah. Yeah. And it's good.

And I can give you the gist. I mean, because there's a whole nother part that I didn't do, which I don don't know if you need to do but he had to like write a love letter to himself and burn it or something i'm like i don't think you have to do no but you can i never understand the burning of things because you're scared of fire that's true like let's just like toss it away or throw it into the ocean yeah well that Well, that's littering, but that's better. Who cares? Yeah, she's a vegan. She's done enough. Wait, are you really vegan?

Yeah. So, okay. Amy was making fun of me. I was strictly vegan for three years, and then I got pregnant. Had a miscarriage, obviously. What, because you were eating meat? No, I... miscarriage obviously um like you're eating meat no i so i when i was pregnant i had all these for like i had the cravings and stuff and so i completely stopped being vegan and then since then

i've just been like not vegan yeah i wasn't vegan when i was pregnant either okay i was vegetarian then i went back to meat then then I went back to vegetarian, then... Was your body, like, craving meat when you were pregnant? It was literally craving everything.

I had a fucking cookie the size of my head every single day when I was pregnant. I mean, I would just, like, one time I dug the donuts, they didn't have them,

and I was, like, flipping out. I was like, what happened? Someone come in me. Let's go yeah wait carlos i think i texted you a tiktok hold on is this jeff yeah i want to know what healthy self-esteem is it's when you see yourself as no better or no worse than anyone else. Unhealthy self-esteem is when you see yourself as worse than everyone else, which manifests as shame and inferiority,

or when you think you're better than everyone else, which manifests as grandiosity and superiority. Now you know. I mean, this guy has to say that. Look at him. I feel like we have... I don't want to say I'm better. I'm not better than anyone except that guy.

No, not therapy, Jeff. He's like my best friend. I'm like... I... I don't want to say I'm better. I'm not better than anyone except that guy. No, not therapy Jeff. He's like my best friend. I'm like... I mean, not really, but in my head. Guys, you want to know about self-esteem. You guys! Oh my God, I fucking showed the bullies my therapy Jeff account.

Oh my God. Jeff is in therapy? No, no, no. He's a therapist. He's amazing. He's just a guy who went... He went into therapy because he was so... Look at how weak he is. I was bullied, no. He's a therapist. He's amazing. He's just a guy who went, he went into therapy because he was so,

look at how weak he is. I was bullied every day of my life growing up and now I have a healthy self-esteem. No, no, no. I don't think I'm better than anyone. Those bullies had bad self-esteem. Stop!

Bullies have great self-esteem. Stop it! I feel great knowing I'm better than that guy. I feel wonderful. This is my guy. Literally every time I see him, I'm like,

oh, it's, I'm like, Dave, it's therapy, Jeff. Come look. Oh, my god. Do you feel a little low today? So, when, back in the day when I got my ears pinned. People told me to fix my teeth.

I didn't do it. I said no. I said, I just combed the hair over the bald spot. You fucking bitch, stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Some people don't like short men. I don't think you can tell while I'm sitting. It's a woman who doesn't like a short guy.

Stop. It's too good. It's too good. The bell is there for a reason. Look at her. Why am I out of breath? You guys have to stop. He's so nice.

Is Dave jealous? Is Dave like, stop looking at Jeff? I find making fun of people, honestly, a form of affection. It is. That's like, you know, I'm listening to him. I'm paying attention to him. I see him. Me and Annie must be really hot and heavy.

We are a thing. We're a fucking thing. Yeah, why is it that you like being made fun of but Jeff can't be made fun of well Jeff didn't ask for this yes he did he put himself oh no

he didn't go to a speech therapist and then he put himself on camera when you were when you were in the universe as stars deciding whether

you were going to come to earth you and Jeff got together and you were like let's have big ears and be short let's see if we can do it who can still make it who can still make it let's see if we can get through life being shorter than every other person on earth why do you guys think he's short

i mean i can tell by the way his shoulders are last night there was a guy in the front row on a date with a girl and he was half of her size and it took me my like the amount of strength that took me to not make fun of his height is how i have to talk about it right now do you know what i mean like i did put so much effort into it that i have to mention it here to get praise right i was like your glasses i just didn't want to make fun of him for what he always gets made fun of oh my god one time i was on stage and this was at austin i don't know if you saw this show but um so i asked this couple's a question i don't know what it was

and she i could tell the way she leaned forward and immediately answered i go let let him answer let him answer yeah let that let the man have a moment you know and then he was i was like what do you do and he was like i i i i i like he was i mean i'm not doing a good stutter but he was like and then i looked at her and she goes oh that's awesome i saw that and then i just had to like wait it out and i was like it took forever and i was like oh my god how do i get out of this i don't know and then someone finished his sentence for him over you know some other guy yelled it out and then i was like oh thank you and then i dealt with the guy who yelled instead of you know somebody who has and that guy was a guy who had oh he kept like yelling out i don't know if you went to him first but he had a um was this last night no this was like months ago this was this was the set i cried at so he goes he goes well

she goes what are you doing she goes i own a water company yeah yeah right and she goes you own a water company and he goes yeah but it's like special and she's like well what's special about it and he's like oh well it's like weed wait what was cannabis infused cannabis infused water infused water like what i'm hearing right and bonnie goes well why would you want cannabis and oh he goes it helps you sleep it helps you sleep and i was, why would you want cannabis? Oh, he goes, it helps you sleep. It helps you sleep. And I was like, why would you want to drink a full thing of water? That's what I like to do before I go to sleep is drink a full thing of water. Yeah.

And so everyone's laughing. It's like, perfect. And then she goes, well, what's the name of the company? And it was like something like named after, it was some bad name. Named after a DJ. And he goes, I named it after a DJ. And she goes, and for these reasons, I'm out. That's amazing. And it was so, it was like the best crowd work i've ever seen it is weird that being a dj is like almost like the guy theory of occupations like it's just embarrassing but now

it's kind of not because they're the ones that are literally making they're making so much 20 million dollars why how because people need music people like to dance people don't know how to put They're the ones that are literally making. They're making so much money. $20 million. Why? How? Because people need music. People like to dance. People don't know how to put together a list. Somebody's never done Molly. Let's just say Kalilah right now is learning why DJs make money in her little K-hole.

Halfway through one song, you got to bring in another song. It's not as easy as you think, you know. Yeah, sometimes you have to listen, you have to be like, all right, one, two, three. What's gonna go on after this? You know what they do? They go, one, two, three. One, two, three.

It's like really impressive for someone with no rhythm. That's, you could be a DJ. What do you think about DJs? Do you think it's hard? No, it's not hard. Okay, that's.

Yeah, you probably just need a MacBook, right? Yeah. Why are you so mad at me? I'm not mad. He's bitching. You're projecting onto me. I think you're mad at me today. Do you really feel like I'm mad at you?

The sexual... Because you're projecting. When have I been mad at you? Because I have nothing but love right now. Let me tell you when I've been mad at you. Okay. Certainly, I've been mad at you. What?

We don't... I don't know that I've been mad at you. I'm thinking about it. I'm trying to think about it we've never gotten in a huge fight before i've never been in a fight by the way i was going through old photos today and there are some photos of us three on a walk and we are fat so ugly we were ugly no i remember carlos taking pictures of us eating slurpees and it was like we look like we eat slurpees like i remember like wow i just want to tell the young people out there that if you think you're not good looking it

gets better okay because these the three of us i can't speak for you i don't know what you look no we saw the picture on her fucking we were we saw her book picture I don't think you're hearing how ugly all three of us were. One of my favorite Instagram posts was of my own. I know. I was like, I don't want it to sound like I'm giving a compliment to anyone but myself. Not that I'm better than you guys, but I am better than Jeff. No, Annie. I am.

I'm better than Jeff. I'm better than Jeff. I have a psychology degree. I have a psychology degree. No, you don't. Annie, that's not healthy self-esteem. I'll tell you what's healthier, right? If you think you're better than other people, that's not healthy.

It's not. I got to hear them again. Kanye says the same thing. Kanye says that? Yeah. Or yay. Sorry. I thought it was yay.

It's not. It's yay. I know. It looks like yay. It's yay. That's so annoying to make people say yay. Yeah. I don't want to say yay right now. It's yay. I know. It looks like ye. It's yay. That's so annoying to make people say yay. Yeah. I don't want to say yay right now.

Look at Carlos. Self-esteem involves self-love. I would do anything for Jeff's hair. Carlos, I bought you Jeff's hair and you fucking peeled it off your head. Wait, who's this? I'm not a gay. What happened to the sentence? I bought you Jeff's hair said in an angry tone i'm actually this is

our first fight no honestly carlos you blew it with the toupee the second day you were wearing it was so good though it was he was i got him a toupee for the our live show hollywood grade it was like i mean i dropped cash i dropped cash and I wish the hairdresser had like faded it into your hair better. But it was just, it was just atop his head. I got a joke one that looked like a merkin. Like it was like, just like really like, like, like Fred, or Ben Sav. I was not going to say Jewish, but yes, it was very Jewish. And as a joke, and I look over and the professional hairdresser was putting that one on his head.

Like she had decided that matched at the best. But the second day he was wearing it was funny when he had like his hat on. But Jeff still has hair on top of his head. I'm like trying to do that. It's going great. Thanks, Esther. If you believe, try hypnosis. Try hypnosis. I wonder if you can make thanks if you believe try hypnosis yeah hypnosis i wonder if you can make your hair grow back with hypnosis probably anything is possible no limits annie get rid of

the blocks you're you're balding because you believe you're balding okay i'm gonna do hypnosis with you and this is giving me the vibes of when Kanye said slavery is a choice. Like, this is not good. Let's not bring up his worst hits. Slavery is a choice. Annie said being gay was a choice earlier. No, I didn't. Well, you told me to choose to be gay.

I mean, you can still choose to be gay. Yeah. I guess that's true. You know, it doesn't have to work like that. You can be born gay, but you can also choose to be gay. Yep. Look at that. Annie, we're not fighting. You didn't have to roll your eyes at me.

I let you squirt oat milk cum in my face earlier. Why did you call it oat milk cum? No one said that word except... All right, this show is over. I want to do more. No. Look at she's got it. I want to do more.

How many more phallic things could you have? I thought you hated men. We'll see you guys next week for a brand new episode. Thank you.