TRASHFUTURE - Scruton Under Scrutiny feat. Josie Long
Episode Date: November 13, 2018Did a bad thing happen? Well, here are 50 British columnists to tell you why you’re an intolerant liberal elitist for calling it bad. In that spirit, Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@Milo_Edwards), and Husse...in (@HKesvani) spoke with comedian and Arts Emergency founder Josie Long @JosieLong) in a whirlwind session that covered Brendan O’Neill’s pedantic defence of the Grenfell effigy burners and the recent appointment of classic inverted book pedant Roger Scruton to a high-profile Tory quango. This episode also features Milo writing his own Brendan O’Neill article, and it’s a delight. During the episode, Riley quotes an article that sounds way smarter than anything any of us would have come up with. That’s because it’s this article by India Block in Dezeen: https://www.dezeen.com/2018/11/06/building-better-building-beautiful-commission-uk-architects-react-news/ *COMEDY KLAXON* Come see Milo host a night of free stand-up at the Sekforde in London on 21st November at 8 pm: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/smoke-comedy-featuring-pierre-novellie-tickets-52410874336 Also, remember that your favourite moron lads have a Patreon now. You too can support us here: https://www.patreon.com/trashfuture/overview Don’t forget that you can commodify your dissent with a t-shirt from http://www.lilcomrade.com/. Get whichever slogan you want, but get the damn shirts!
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hi, it's Milo here, and you might be used to hearing Nade's voice at moments like this,
but this time it's my voice, and maybe that means it's better or worse, but we're not
sure.
But the reason I'm talking to you right now is because I forgot to plug the stand-up
show when we were on the actual podcast.
So on the 21st of November at the Sekford in London, which is at 34 Sekford Street
at 8 p.m., you can come and see me host a free stand-up show with these great comedians.
We've got Pien Nevelli, Pope Lonergan, Charlie Dinkin, and Jamie Fraser.
It's going to be really great.
You should come down.
You can meet me.
You can ask me about soup or whatever, and it'd be really great to see you guys there.
Okay, thanks.
In exciting news out of the United States, it appears as though Democrats have made significant
gains in the House of Representatives.
However, Republicans also managed to flip some seats, included in some of their winnings
was one of the Nevada congressional seats, where Dennis Hoff, a pimp who has been dead
for only three weeks, has been elected.
Josie, Milo, have you guys heard anything about any other Republicans getting elected
in the States?
Yeah.
Wasn't there a guy who got elected in Wyoming who was just sort of a scarecrow made out of
turkey preserved in formaldehyde?
I heard that there was a piece of paper, but it was white.
It was a really big piece of white paper, and it just said Republican written on it in a
very shaky by row, like drawn by the hand of almost a ghost.
And that was elected.
I like spooky candidates.
Those are my favorite ones.
Do you know what?
That would be fun if there was an election, but all the candidates were a bit spooky.
Yes, I'm voting for a zombified Hillary Clinton.
Republicans wouldn't even have to do anything.
All their candidates are ghouls.
So nice.
The thing that genuinely scared me is that there was a, I think it's a congressional
district, but please, I'm so ignorant.
I'm from Britain, and I'm just watching things like it's a fun game show.
But there was a guy in Illinois who was literally from the Nazi Party and then got into the
Republican Party and lost, but got like 56,000 votes.
I hate Illinois Nazis.
That's not what somebody said.
No.
So I don't feel familiar with the film The Blues Brothers.
Oh, sure.
Do you know?
I've still not seen it.
Nearly 40 years on this ad.
Oh, no.
Well, there you go.
You need to check it out.
Interestingly, one of them actually was elected as a fictional character to a Republican
seat in Delaware.
What?
Well, okay.
Republican ran across his glass.
It shows the stage we're at that that was like, wait, what, really?
And theme song.
Hello.
Welcome back again to this, your free episode of TF.
Hello.
Once more, I guess I'm going to say this time because I'm still bad at opening the show.
I've never gotten good at it.
We've been doing it for so long.
You know what?
I just had a thought because trash is all one word.
Isn't it technically just T?
Oh, no, we're, we are Tony Soprano being addressed by his friends.
Hey, T.
Hey.
Oh.
Hey, T. Well, no, you want one of these mink coats?
Go out there, get yourself any sandwich you want.
Okay.
No, I love when fucking Maddie Bevilacourt, Sean Gismonti, like try to talk to him in
the urinal and they're like, hey, T, what's going on?
He's like, Tony, Tony, when I got my dick out of Tony, okay?
I am joined today by Milo Edwards.
It's me.
Hussein in slight absentee, he's wrapping up an interview for his press job, but he'll
be grabbing a mic and joining us in a moment.
And Josie Long.
Hello.
It's my pleasure and my joy to be here.
I'm on maternity leave.
I have no brain and I basically feed a child using my body.
That's all I do.
That's all I have.
Congratulations on being elected to the Republican Party for Florida.
On a family's first platform.
Wait, hang on.
Are you showing your young child boobs?
Cause I'm not sure that should be allowed.
We're going to get to Roger's group later.
I cover them with a white sheet.
It's a child, Josie.
You sick?
No, we use, um, we use orthodox rules.
We cover all of Josie in a white sheet and then just cut out one little hole and it's
fine.
With two holes, surely.
Well, I guess it only has one mouth.
You could use, you could be.
The left breast is the devil's breast.
The left breast wants to make Europe multicultural and like, and wants to do cultural Marxism.
Oh my God.
That'll be the new.
Can I tell you guys the first time I ever heard the phrase liberal elite in real life?
Right.
So it's before Brexit and all my family live in Kent, which is very wrong and bad.
They agreed.
And I have to go down and visit them in fucking Kent, which I chose to leave some 18 years
ago, right?
And I was down visiting some family in Kent and I was getting the train back up and there
was a guy who was about 40 years old.
He was obviously a white man and he was sort of dressed in quite a, what's the word, smart
attire.
Okay.
And he was arguing with the woman on the gate to get off the train.
Yeah, the ticket barrier.
Thank you.
And the woman on the ticket barrier, he hadn't bought an upgrade for the high speed train,
right?
And he was so angry at her that he was getting really shouting.
And then after like this little shout, he just shouted liberal elite.
It's just on its own.
Just like liberal elite.
The liberal elites are trying to make it so you can't, so you can't get to Maidstone
quickly.
Well, we can't leave Maidstone.
He was like, you stay down in Kent.
You stay down in Maidstone because we, the baristas own all of London.
You wouldn't get it.
We are the literal gatekeepers.
All of these people are so frightened of just like a woman with short purple hair.
It's great.
So we've got some stuff.
Oh, boy, do we have some stuff.
Some things happened this week.
I don't know if you guys have known, but the news kept going.
Oh, that's a shame.
Yeah, I've heard about things.
I don't have to start.
I don't really like them.
Recently.
It's not been going well for things.
Yeah.
I don't.
I don't.
I'm interested in transitioning to stuff.
I think maybe if we started paying attention to stuff that we could start with now defunct
stuff magazine, for example, now stuff is something that could get elected to the Republican
party.
That's just a pile of stuff with stuff like nuts or with stuff like.
Oh, it was like a tech magazine.
Oh, it wasn't.
But I think it was a tech magazine that had some tits in it, because there was that there
was that point in history where you couldn't not have tits in a magazine.
Well, it was like the London review of books.
I don't think they ever went.
It's like an arty picture on the front, although I was I was talking about this earlier this
morning.
Do you remember when every single like comedy aimed at sort of 16 to 24 year olds had two
obligatory boob scenes?
Yes.
I I feel like every comedy still in America has a scene where they go around the strip
club for no reason.
Just deal with that.
Yeah.
And I whenever I see it, I'm like, this is the laziest writing I've ever seen.
Everyone has seen this five thousand times.
It's like also how do they think like because I was thinking of some film like grandma's
boy, which I mean, to be honest, was very foundational to my sort of 14 year old self.
It's a film about getting sex on WhatsApp.
Where's grandma's boy?
I think it's a movie about a guy.
No, that's the ringer where Johnny Knoxville rigs the Special Olympics.
They all run together.
Wait there.
I'm cooking.
That is like something one of the Trump children would do, rig the Special Olympics today.
And Eric Trump has won the Special Olympics.
They don't need to rig it.
Yeah.
Grandma's boy.
So they've got a chimpanzee in one of the scenes.
Oh, this is a spicier film than I first thought.
Joe Rogan looking at a chimpanzee, a video game creator, great start, finds himself
homeless and moves in with Lily, his wacky grandmother, hijinks a chimpanzee.
So they go, thank you.
I mean, I spent a lot of my of my early teens watching what it could only be described as
like stupid guy movies because I was friends with what has now on the internet come to
be known as a bunch of hot couch guys.
But we won't go too much too much further into that because I want to get into this.
You know, we can do.
We can do stories from Riley's sort of teenage teenage period as an installments like Dickens,
but for like a fat, a fat teen like me.
If you can just wait 50 years, those will be very nostalgic and charming.
They will be my shall we say gentle regrets, shadowing of the content delight from okay.
So one, what happened last week was a group of, I guess we could say people had decided
to in celebration of Guy Fox Knight, which for our American listeners is when a bunch
of the guys, the guy who was the basis of the V for Vendetta mask did V for Vendetta
by trying to blow up Parliament.
And then they were like, how do we own this guy by naming a camp fireworks holiday after
him?
Where children wave little fiery ones.
Now it's a fireworks holiday where people like burn effigies of stuff and whatever.
This group of people who unsurprisingly are members of their local conservative club decided
to burn effigy of Grenfell Tower, complete with sort of not clearly non white figures
taped to the windows trying to get out.
This is and then said, but you could hear this in the background because they taped
it on a WhatsApp video that was then leaked.
They then said, this is what you get for not paying your rent, cool group of people,
which is a really dumb landlord owned because like if someone's not paying their rent, like
burning down the house isn't a good way to punish them because you own the house.
That's how being a landlord works.
It's not like, you know,
he's really fucking bleak and it's really grim.
And I was saying, I saw somebody like, I can't remember who it was, but someone I followed
and on Twitter saying that like there is a very clear overlap between people who do not
want people to be punished for having done this, but want to imprison people for burning
a poppy.
And it is a bit like, like how can you possibly defend this?
Just because you're like, well, I guess I'm coming out to bat for my team and my team
is old cunts.
Well, the reason why burning a poppy should be illegal, Josie, is because it's a waste
of good heroin.
I would never be called burning a poppy cooking one in a spoon.
Sure.
But setting fires.
I'll ruin it.
You're going to just.
Are we animals?
And so predictably, the right wing press has largely come out in defense of these people.
Of course, they always do.
They always find a reason because they have now been arrested on a public order offense,
which is basically a why it's sort of like a wide law that you can interpret a lot of
different ways, but sort of intent.
It's a lot of hate speech falls under it, I believe.
Stuff like stuff like.
Yeah.
It's the kind of law where imagine someone from New Zealand going, hey, stop being a
dick.
It's one of those laws.
Yes.
Kind of.
That's basically the legal precedent for it.
But I mean, fine.
And the thing is, I try not to get up in arms about people making jokes.
And to be honest, I can't even say I support a prison term for them just because I don't
support prison generally.
I try not to be a hypocrite about that, but.
And also it's still like a dumb as fuck thing.
Like these people are clearly callous households, but they haven't actually done anything to
anyone.
It's just like they're just pricks.
But the stance of the, you might say the right-wing commentariate is that, oh, we may be offended,
but oh, your desire not to be offended trumps my desire, sorry, trumps my desire to my
free speech.
I'm so bored of that.
I'm so bored of that being trolled out every five fucking minutes because it's been going
like that's their whole brittle, flimsy fucking argument is like, oh, you're also offended.
It's like, no, people are just bullied by you online to the point of having to withdraw
from public life.
Or there's people who have literally been murdered that you're disrespecting to such
a full extent that you probably need to be in some way shamed for it.
Otherwise it'll be seen to be like supporting it.
Oh my God.
It's so tired.
And I also want to be like, guys, I am literally never offended by you cunts.
I'm just bored and like other people's lives are made impossible by it.
I wish they were offensive, like in an exciting, no, I don't know.
Although I am constantly thrilled by how dumb they are.
I do enjoy, I think it would be a shame if they stopped doing it because it's such a
joy.
Like I'm like, wow, people spent like, it was quite an intricate energy, like people
spent like hours building that to be like, oh, we're going to own those fire victims.
And you're like, what?
Like what's going through these people's minds?
They're like 50.
Do you know, he should go on a ceramics course.
Well, yeah.
They made a febic effigy building of a man of only 50.
He was, remember, it's he's a young man of only 50.
He doesn't know better.
And also he did it 10 years ago when he was only 45.
He was maddened.
So I actually have some details in some of these people.
They've been named.
Clifford Smith, who is surprisingly a by to let a by to let landlord.
Oh, wow, Stephen Bull, the 55 year old owner of a removals firm.
So a small business tyrant.
But then, best of all, Paul Buzetti, Buzetti is also a landlord who owns an eight million
pound block of flats and Clapham, from which he makes over 30,000 pounds a month, which
he purchased for I make him.
He's almost making.
He's believed, but he's believed to have used the four million pound inheritance that
he got from his father, who was found murdered in a suitcase after a dispute with a tenon.
Murdered in a suitcase.
So wait, hang on a minute.
So the implication of that is not that his body was found in a suitcase, but that he
was found to have been murdered in the suitcase.
He was found murdered and in a suitcase.
There I was, just relaxing in my suitcase when these bastards come along, right?
When they start having at me with his pickaxe.
So this, and Buzetti, where they took place at his house in South Norwood.
If you had that much money, why would you live in fucking South Norwood?
I used to live in West Norwood.
It's the shitest place I've ever lived.
Because bagel king fam is well good.
I've like, he's got so much money, South fucking Norwood.
I know.
It's bizarre.
Absolutely.
See, that's the problem with money in general.
He's calculated it's the least metropolitan elite part of London, that's why.
Well, that's the...
Can't buy class.
Is that they are, is that this is a guy with a Range Rover with a custom license plate
on it.
We don't know what the custom license plate is.
C0CK.
Almost certainly.
That or a slur.
So it's turf.
I don't think he knows what that is.
I reckon he's the guy who owns the BMW I saw the other day, the number plate of which
was big bucks spelt with an X.
Oh, wow.
You're in the UK.
Who says bucks?
Like, that's something my mum would say, like, oh, he's earning big bucks.
He's making the mega bucks.
And at Brasetti's house, the outside is a big sign that says party animal.
Do you know what that's easy to find?
Yeah.
There can't be that many party animal houses in South Norwood.
Not with a bunch of white dudes living in them anyway.
South fucking Norwood.
Like next to that will be like the South Norwood boating lake or some shit.
And then there's this big house.
But I'm looking at...
It's actually a big house.
It's a half million pound house.
I read all of this on the new woke Daily Mail.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
Thanks comrades.
Yeah.
So, but this is...
This is this group.
And then they also like got their kids doing it, their 18, 19 year old kids to largely...
And again, for almost an enormous amount of effort for basically no payoff other than
a series of like now legal troubles that they're in, they just really wanted to try being
owned online.
They were really enthusiastic about giving it a go.
Yeah.
And then these are all...
So again, surprisingly, members of the conservative club, guys who look like they sort of take
a yearly vacation to Mallorca to go like jet skiing, like that's who this is.
And buy expensive, fancy shirts from a man who saw them coming.
I genuinely know someone who says every year he would go to Mallorca and there was this
like, like gentleman's fashion store on there that would clearly get sent like the worst
shit from like Prada and whatever that no one would buy.
And this guy would buy it every year and he'd be like, oh yeah, this shirt 300 quid
and it'd be like a canary yellow shirt with some horrendous print on it.
It'd be like, yeah, it may have cost you money, but that does not make it good.
And that's the thing is that Brendan O'Neill has carried a lot of water for this particular
group of shitheads.
He has said...
It's like a right wing camel.
He has...
Camels are right wing.
Because they're arseholes.
They've got terrible personality.
You sound like you've had history with camels.
My landlord is a camel foot.
No, it couldn't make sense.
I'm tired.
Yeah, that's fine.
I enjoyed it.
Never. It was good win.
Can we try it?
Oh, delightful.
Delightful bit.
I hide for a day when you could be whimsical for a camel.
Brendan O'Neill, why has nobody created a fictitious story for Brendan O'Neill to back yet?
Like, why are there not enough people posing as the authentic white working class that
he loves so fucking much?
Why is nobody taking him for enough of a ride yet?
Like, he'll sign up for everything.
This is your job, guys.
I'm a busy working mother of one.
I dressed up as a camel, Valouine, and the Muslims are saying it's cultural appropriation.
Exactly.
He'd be like, I'll do Fendress of the Death, you see?
I've got the right umpire.
Anyway.
Superb.
Absolutely.
So that's the thing.
He came out writing an article saying this was bad behavior, sure, but does it deserve
a prison term?
Not because he's a prison abolitionist, but because he ultimately thinks he wants it
to be excusable that essentially that this is just tastelessness.
And I think I for one am very tired of reading Brendan O'Neill's articles because I realized
they could just be written by an AI at this point because he always does the same thing.
Free speech is valued by the real working class who are by the way, who are these people?
This group of landlords and small business sirens just because they, you know, like
they're party monsters who have bad taste.
That's what he thinks the working class is.
Well, he wants, yeah, he wants the idea of what might be working class to be entirely
divorced from the idea of labor, not even labor as in the party, the idea of labouring,
working, and also entirely devoid from how much money you may or may not have.
So the people that are left are millionaire landlords.
Yeah, exactly.
People who hate the working class.
Calling him Phil Green makes him sound like a minor soap actor.
So that's the thing.
James Dellingpole or Brendan O'Neill will consistently come out in defense of Phil Green because
they're like, oh yeah, he's the working class boy made good.
So you can be a working class billionaire of these people.
Of course.
It makes zero sense.
What that means because his entire shtick is just a reaction from that basis.
We've decided to set a little challenge for the listener.
Instead of me reading from Brendan O'Neill's articles and us saying, oh yeah, what a dumb
ass like we've done so many times before.
It's a shame because I was really looking forward to saying cunt multiple times.
We'll still do that.
We actually have a challenge where between us, one of me and Milo has the real Brendan O'Neill
article and one has an article that we have written.
I mean, they're going to be able to tell the difference.
So Milo Exhibit A.
Because you don't know how bad what I wrote is.
Well, now they figured it out.
Can I just read my Brendan O'Neill article?
Go for it.
Yeah.
Okay.
Rosa Parks and the men who burned an effigy of Grenfell Tower don't have much in common.
One is a well-known hero of the civil rights movement and noted bus passenger.
The others are a roguish band of un-PCs, scaffolders and property owners.
And yet there is one thing that binds them, being persecuted by the system for standing
up to its norms.
For sure, those burning an effigy of Grenfell didn't run the risk of being lynched for their
resistance, but in so-called the online court of public opinion, are they not fates worse
than death?
These brave souls, unapologetically working class in the way they manage their portfolios
of properties, are being hounded by the baying Twitter mob for nothing more than being real
folks who enjoy a beer, a burger and an effigy.
Something the SJWs cannot permit.
The Corbinistas would have us believe that they are ushering in a new age of tolerance.
But what does tolerance mean in a world where a group of men can't burn an effigy of a tragedy
in the privacy of their own home and then gloatingly post it on social media?
What will they ban next?
Making your own gollywogs?
Expressing a thought crime opinion?
Or the noble sport of trouser ferreting?
We are not Stalinists, they cry, and yet they are conducting nothing less than a show trial
of these men.
They would have us believe that these men are callous, burning an effigy of Grenfell tower
out of spiteful mockery, but where is their voice in this?
We cannot be sure of their intent.
Burning effigy has a long been a sign of tribute and reverence, from the pagan wicker man to
the infamous burning cross of the Ku Klux Klan, who for all their controversies were
undeniably staunch Christians.
Today's so-called radicals do not believe in anything that could be called tolerance,
only trance, like adherence to the group think of their so-called leaders.
Truly, we live in a society, and that society is, as George Orwell said, 1984.
Nate, you want to clip that for the preview?
I knew you'd enjoy that.
So just like, truly, we live in a society.
That's the full stop.
We absolutely do.
That's the effigy I want to burn, actually, is I want to get a big...
I want to burn a number of effigies.
I want to burn one that's S-O-C-I.
You see where I'm going with this?
I don't, but keep going, I'll get that.
Oh, is it?
I've been right-wing all the time.
Brendan O'Neill.
What?
Brendan O'Neill.
Ever get to say he is on and off the left?
He is the most antagonising thing in the popular world.
Oh, do you know the story?
Oh, Living Marxism, all that fucking...
What is that?
What is all of that, if not a Psyop designed to make people crazy?
Like, how can anyone understand that?
Psyop is my favourite Pokémon.
Brendan O'Neill would be his CIA plant, except he's far too stupid to get recruited.
So here are some of the lines from his actual article that he did write.
Can I just say the other day I googled, how do you work for MI5?
Just for a bit of fun.
I've already disqualified myself from working for MI5 by googling, how do I work for MI5?
But I've got this really weird video presentation about working for MI5.
And one of them is like, I've heard that I can't have a family work for MI5.
And it's like, no, we've got a crash.
We've got a family we'll be looked after by the world's best secret agent.
We've got a crash where we have only the most fun waterboards.
I mean, waterslides.
And this always sounds like a portmanteau of creme fraiche to me.
Oh, I got told off, because I think I say creche.
Me and my boyfriend keep having arguments about very minor pronunciations because we've got a baby.
We would never have anything like that.
Yeah, in that regard, you and your boyfriend are exactly like me and Riley.
Irritatingly just says things completely wrong.
Ah, distressing.
Obviously, he said that the podcast is our baby and we keep trying to feed it.
Oh, I think we might have a visitor.
It's Brendan O'Neill's biggest fan.
It's Brendan O'Neill.
Oh, Hussain, you missed out on my Brendan O'Neill article.
But I am Brendan O'Neill and I wrote that article.
Is he coming through?
All I would like to say is that if we distributed wealth to the lowest people in society,
we wouldn't have a working class.
That kind of is what he thinks.
Hello, my name is Hussain Kizvani.
I have been on an interview for the past like 25 minutes.
So I've been very rude to Josie, the guest.
Hello, Josie. I'm a big fan.
Oh, I'm a big fan of yours.
I love following you online.
Shall we leave so you guys can just fucking like tag along and have a little session?
Welcome to the bro pad.
The guy household.
It's a real treat for me as a woman to be here.
Oh, can I say also?
I'm quite sincere, I think.
And that's a real downer for being a comedian.
And that's probably my contribution at the moment is to be like, guys, what about this?
Not saying anything funny because I'm sorry.
I don't know that living Marxism was like really anti the environment.
Oh, yeah.
They think that being an environmentalist is Trotskyite.
Oh, Jesus.
They were like the least cool elements of.
They were like the elements of the left that hate our show for being too fun.
Yeah.
I mean, to be fair, the Soviet Union demonstrably hated the environment.
At least definitely indeed, if not in word.
Good God.
So didn't my like, wasn't there a period where the Soviet Union wants to blow up the moon for like no reason?
Other than that, it was like, it was like extremely angry at it.
Or rename it like Lenin moon.
No, I'm sending darts.
I'm very, I'm very sure that there were like, there were some documents that were like,
unnerved like a few years ago, which said that there was a Soviet plan to blow up the moon for no other reason,
but to prove that they could do it.
Just in case there is a Nazi movement.
Brendan O'Neill writes, the Soviet plan to blow up the moon is nothing but Stalinist totalitarianism.
The thought police say it's not cool to be a satellite.
But it's also an important part of free speech.
I'll part of the moon if I want to.
That's like Brendan O'Neill would say, if the Soviet Union wanted to blow up the moon,
he would say it's Stalinist totalitarianism.
However, if he wanted to blow up the moon, it would be free speech.
And if anyone tried to stop the Soviet Union blowing up the moon,
that would be an imposition on free speech.
So, so this is a selection.
If you can remember Milo's fake article.
This is a selection from Brendan O'Neill's real article in spiked where he says,
I cannot be the only person who finds the Metropolitan police is promised to investigate the Grenfell tower bonfire video.
Metropolitan elite police promise to investigate the Grenfell tower bonfire video.
More chilling than the video itself.
That's worse.
It's worse that they're being punished for it.
And he, of course, says, yes, the video is repulsive, but what kind of crime is being committed here?
Saying disgusting things in your own back garden.
And you see other children in my back garden.
Yeah.
So this is, he says, some say the hate crime was committed when someone decided to take the video from a WhatsApp group and share it online,
where others would have seen it and possibly felt hated by it.
In which case, will the veritable army of virtue signalers from the political and media world,
who have been feverishly sharing the video and declaring their disgust with it,
also be questioned by the police for aiding and abetting this alleged hate crime?
Yeah, they all will.
Anyone who shared that video is now under caution from the Metropolitan police.
So it's millions of people.
It's created a three year paperwork backlog for the entire Metropolitan police.
And what they've also done is they've closed down the murder and the grooming gangs units.
Absolutely.
And they've put all of their funding for the next six years on to investigating people who've shared this video.
If you complain about it, then you go to prison for being racist.
You go to racist jail.
Yeah, that's what's happened.
The Serious Fraud Office is now being run by Tommy Robinson because he agreed to do it for free.
You go to the special racist jail where you're completely censored and you know you're censored
because you're put on question time to talk about how you're censored.
We are in this.
So this is basically his shtick, right?
Which is you can't tell the difference between good and bad things.
So we collectively should never do anything unless it is to maintain like some guy who looks like a thumb
and lives in Watford's right to say the n-word.
Oh, it's the drill tweet about drunk driving.
Yeah.
Basically, yes.
I can't recall it yet.
So drunk driving kills so many people a year, but also helps some people get to work on time.
So we can't say if it's bad or not.
Yeah.
I mean, it's one of those things where like it's like, I think Brendan O'Neill has a superficial point in that like,
yeah, I don't think people should go to jail for stuff like this because I think people like this should just be socially censured.
Like that is the appropriate response.
This is a million people online calling you a fucking dumbass.
Like that is an approach that is a punishment that perfectly fits the crime.
And therefore like the police are kind of investigating it because they have to because it falls under the remit of like a very broad law.
But if anyone did actually go to jail for this, I'd be a bit like, that seems excessive.
Well, here's the problem though, because he says this is just giving offense.
This is Brendan's point.
This is giving offense and we're criminalizing giving offense because we're so easily offended.
Again, even though he thinks white male is the worst slur, he wrote an article to that effect, a whole article.
That was a headline.
But what he should have written is after he said white male is the worst slur, he should have put in brackets that I will ever hear directed at me.
Close brackets.
That's not even true.
But here's the thing, like just this morning, a Tommy Robinson supporter got arrested for spitting in a young Muslim girl's face.
And when we strive for this kind of neutral even handedness, right, like even in the face of something sort of so diffuse as this,
at some point we have to decide like, no, we as a society are basically like realizing that this fuels a culture of like contempt into humanization that we're just not going to put up with.
At some point you have to make it.
You can't not because Brendan O'Neill's whole thing is making a big show of never making a moral stand.
He always does, but he makes a big show of saying, oh, no, it's not.
There is no moral thing we can do.
We have to play by rules and the rules should be limited.
But at some point, at some point when we get to this phase, some you either take a moral stand or you're completely incoherent.
I agree.
That's all I have to say.
Yeah, like, it's a joke.
Like him and Dylan.
Oh, all of them.
You just, that's all I have to say.
They're complete parodies.
Yeah, they are.
They have no, but also to the extent that I'm like, this can't, he can't believe all like, what's he fucking, what's he up for breakfast in the morning?
Do you know what I mean?
Like, is everything he does so contrary?
Well, he claimed that he, his identity politics is one of an Irish peasant.
Wow.
But then do you know what?
This is the worst thing.
Going out in Halloween in the sackcloth and Brendan O'Neill's like, my culture is not your costume.
I'm really disgusted by libertarians who have the goal to live in a city and benefit from that public transport and shit like that.
If he really does identify as an Irish peasant, which is so offensive.
Why doesn't he go and live in like a Buffy in the middle of nowhere and have the courage of his fucking convictions?
Irish peasants didn't do a lot of posting.
No, there was no shitposting at that time.
When you think of it, right?
Brendan O'Neill's core grift is just basically being a contrarian and saying that, oh, he's the only one who speaks for the working class,
because he thinks that the working class are these kinds of people, the kinds of people who live in South Norwood and have a Range Rover with a custom license plate and are members of the conservative club.
And just have bad taste.
He basically has confused class with having bad taste and thinks that it's his or alternatively just like repellently regressive like political judges views, but the ways you act in them as well.
He's conflated all of that with working class because he sees anything either refined or unrefined, but progressive as condescension.
And it's like, don't you dare give the working class money because you'll erase their identity, as Hussein said earlier.
It's small C class, isn't it?
It's like these people have no class.
Undoubtedly true.
But that's also that.
I think that's a confusion we get into by like we're operating on like a more like economic definition of class, which works in every other country except Britain, like linguistically, because in Britain, you also have a class system,
which is not defined by that in the same way.
Like, so actually the British class system does not mean class at all in the way that like Marxism talks about class.
Like so in a way, he might be right that some of these people are like working class in the like British definition of the term in terms of being like not educated or like of a certain of a certain social milieu.
Right.
Because we think in those, I'm not saying this is good.
I'm just saying that like British people think in these terms and that is why it's so contradictory and it's so shifting and it's so used, used by anyone to embody anything.
It's so pointless.
You know what it means?
It means were you working class in the 1970s?
Oh, yeah.
That's what it is.
It's were you working class in the 1970s?
Did you like to go down the pub and play darts and watch Allo Allo or whatever?
And then you made a lot of...
I saw a bunch of that recently.
It doesn't matter that you're an absolutely super wealthy elite now.
It doesn't matter that your children go to university.
It doesn't matter this like the other because you earned it in the 70s.
And let's not forget that was rubbish in the streets.
That's what they all fucking say.
When men were men.
Yeah.
Three day week.
I used to eat coal.
And the best part about it being the 70s is that literally anyone under 38 wasn't there.
So you can say whatever the fuck you like and no one can have a comeback.
Yeah.
And then they were born.
As soon as they were able to speak, they started telling me that I couldn't say that.
But you've only just started talking.
You're already trying to define the terms.
In the 70s, we were going to put that with it.
So that's right.
Thatcher.
When you could buy beer in a paint tin.
So that's what happened is you were born.
You were born.
You got rich.
You were working class in the 70s.
You took advantage of...
By the way, 1976, the most equal, the best year for equality that the United Kingdom has ever had.
All of those cunts benefiting from the 20 years prior of us vaguely trying to redistribute.
Then becoming a landlord under Thatcher.
And according to Brendon O'Neill, you're still a working class now.
Because working class is something you're born with.
It's like fetal alcohol syndrome.
But that's what he wants because he wants to say, no, no, I'm authentic working class.
Sorry.
I just totally was like, you've made a joke there, but I'm going to say very sincerely that is what Brendon O'Neill wants.
Also, like it's just such a clear point.
If you make your money off other people, you're not working class.
It's not work to be a landlord.
It's not work.
Even if you moan about it, it's not work.
It's other people's work.
That's the clearest, most basic thing.
I don't know.
You have to call the guy about the boiler within a week of them complaining about it.
And then you can tell them that they won't get a reduction in rent and you're not going to do anything about it.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
I mean, all that takes time.
So if I can offer the patented TF summary of this section, these people definitely should go to jail, but for the crime of being landlords.
All right.
So I want to move on to Roger Scruton.
Roger Scruton.
Right.
Thank you.
That's definitely hasn't been made like a thousand times this week.
I mean, look, look, honestly, it's going to be the episode title.
I'm sorry, everybody.
Roger ring and screwing a tongue with Roger Scruton.
Um, so who is who is Roger Scruton and why?
Oh, why the fuck are we talking about him?
I like questions.
Roger Scruton has recently been named to a, I guess you might call it a Quango.
It's sort of Quango ask.
Um, quite a cumquat, not quite a mango.
Not quite a cumquat, not quite a mango.
It's like someone between a quince and a mango.
Oh, lovely.
How do you tell when that's right?
I've never had a quince before.
What?
You can't bite into one.
You can't?
No, he's made into a jelly.
This is why it would be a quince and a mango put together would be like a thing that spins and spins because it's got oppositional things in it.
Like a mango pudding?
No, it would never, because you'd be waiting for the mango part to ripen, but the quince part would overripe it.
Oh, I see.
Okay.
This is what I'm willing to bring to the podcast, overly adult analyses of whimsical fruit based comments.
And that's actually what Roger Scruton has been appointed to the head of.
If you know what a quince is, you're not working class.
That's how that works.
I know what a quince is.
What if I run a quince farm?
I hate to break it to you.
What if I run a quince farm?
You have like four degrees.
Oh, so, so Roger Scruton has been named to the Building Better, Building Beautiful Commission, which no one heard of until now, because he was appointed to it and it's all over the news.
So I'll sort of outline this a little bit.
The purpose of this commission is to quote,
Tackle the challenge of poor quality design and build up homes and places across the country and ensure as we build for the future, we do so with popular consent.
Sounds fine.
It's a Tory quango.
So of course, it's very, very insidious.
Now, just let's park that for a second and let's think of who is Roger Scruton.
I've got a brief little biography here, but think of a skinny Uncle Monty without any of the sexual proclivities.
He is a skinny heterosexual Uncle Monty.
I don't know who Uncle Monty is.
Oh, yes, I do.
Yeah, from Wethel and I.
You know, this is not so good about not sleeping as you're like, you feel like you're adrift in a sea of meaninglessness and then suddenly your brain will just open up and go, oh, you have lived.
That's all we have.
So all the British listeners will know who I'm talking about.
American listeners.
Hold on.
As desperate as sweaty.
Wait, are we talking about Uncle Monty or Roger Scruton now?
Roger Scruton.
Yeah, Roger Scruton.
You don't know who Uncle Monty is.
Do the reading.
We release handouts with the show for a reason.
So he's dense with knowledge.
Yeah, he is.
He is skinny heterosexual Uncle Monty.
But what do we mean?
Roger Scruton is a set the generic and former professor of philosophy and other aesthetics at various elite universities and also Cambridge and generally.
Fuck you, pal.
And generally a quote unquote conservative public intellectual.
And he's very hard to introduce because he has terrible ideas in basically every discipline.
He has written about every every almost everything.
It's written about sort of sexuality, politics, society, aesthetics.
And it's always really just really terrible.
And he basically just gives a respectable veneer to like every shitty reactionary point of view out there.
He's called Joseph Watson's like favorite philosopher.
There you go.
He's actually said this.
He's like Roger Scruton is my favorite philosopher ever.
Yeah, he is a darling of the alt right.
He's philosophy for dummies.
He actually wrote a book called philosophy for intelligent people.
Yeah, I was just about to say he's written a book called an intelligent person's guide to philosophy.
There we go.
And it might as well just like have a sub heading, which is like, it's like soul fucking smug and shit.
I remember when I was 20, I bought a book by a guy called T-Ball Fisher called Don't Read This Book If You're Stupid.
And I was like, what an incredible title.
It was the shitest fucking book.
It was about stand up and he'd obviously never done a gig in his life.
And I was so angry.
And this is exactly that.
It's like, oh, I'll buy that book because I'm intelligent.
Like you're fucking not.
You failed test number one.
Test number one.
Do you think you're so fucking clever that you're going to buy an intelligent person's guide to philosophy written by one?
Also, can I also say Nick Cohen?
Nick Cohen wrote a book called Don't Don't Buy This Book or something.
And we'll look it up now.
Everyone's always trying to shut up because he's being censored from his bully pulpit in the national press.
He was like, you can't read this book, which I guess is like a sort of similar vein.
It's written in Chinese.
Is it written in linear B?
Linear B was decoded.
Oh, yeah.
We have the Rosetta Stone.
Also 2015, he published Fools, Frauds and Firebrands, Thinkers of the New Left.
I wonder what his opinion is.
You can't even feel it.
Fuck, like with things like that, you wouldn't be like...
Because here's the thing.
I'll get into some of his shitty points of view in a sec,
but Roger Scrutin is the kind of conservative,
the kind of public conservative that only an aristocratic society can generate.
Because when you think of it, all American conservatives have been forged in the fires of capitalism.
Even if they are pampered fancy lads, they're brought up to believe that they have to be business success individuals.
Think about Wyatt Coke with the Fat Guy shirt company.
He's not just sitting there in contemplation of the greatness of European tradition.
He feels like he has to get out there, hustle and make a shirt company that sells bags of money and stuff.
They're not into effeminate stuff like doing a Nazi interpretation of Plato.
They're into like real man stuff, like riding a jet ski over black people.
Fuck.
So what...
So Scrutin is this sort of just weepy bell end who has just exists in a sort of fainting couch.
And he literally wrote a book called Gentle Regrets,
which sounds like what you describe as like getting jerked off in a punt.
It sounds like something Matthew Holness wrote genuinely as a joke.
Gentle Regrets.
So Roger Scrutin, if somebody...
So I did an English degree at Oxford and it feels...
Not trying to boast guys.
And it feels like in that kind of deeply conservative world,
he was someone I should have read, didn't even fucking bother reading.
And that's to me is like where he is.
He's like, oh, I didn't even bother looking at you because you was so boring and shit.
He's a version of Brendan O'Neill that says here to for.
Does Brendan O'Neill not say here to for?
Maybe.
I'm sure he does.
Probably.
Yeah.
So he claimed Islamophobia is a made up concept that eugenics is a beautiful science that has been left behind.
Made up concepts.
There's no authentic concept that was discovered.
Sorry.
I didn't know we were dealing with it with a non-plateness.
It's the nature of God.
Oh yeah.
To be fair.
You're right.
You're right.
There's the word of forms, but there's no form for Islamophobia is that his argument.
I'm sure he is a fucking Platonist.
Most fascists are.
The best kind of Islamophobia.
The one that all other kinds of Islamophobia strive towards.
We are merely in the cave looking at shadows of Islamophobia.
I was trying to articulate this earlier and not well enough like he's born in 1944.
Like he's too young for this shit.
He's already outdated by the time he's 20.
Like he should have been born in 1924.
And then I'd be like, oh, you're a Nazi.
That's what you are.
You grew up in the 20s, but he was born in the 40s.
So like in the 60s, he's like, he comes into the 60s, 16 years old and he leaves it 26 years old.
That should have had more effect on him.
Oh, I know who he is nowadays.
Nowadays, he is an extremely rational forum poster who carries a cane as an affectation to his first year English class.
Oh, I know that guy.
I mean, yeah.
I mean, this is like his moment, right?
He's the one of those guys.
If he was like 20 or 30 years younger, he would be online demanding that we debate him
and getting really mad when we were like, send us feet pics or sign up for the Patreon.
Sign up to the debate meet here on Patreon.
And he would be like a member of warplan purple and he would make two, two and a half hour videos about how starship troopers
is actually this really complicated story rather than just a story about guys who love boobs in space.
Who's saying is this inspired by a real Twitter exchange we had?
Maybe it is.
I don't know.
So here are some of his other ideas.
Homosexuality is just masturbation because it's between two like entities.
Perfecence.
Yeah.
No, that's pretty normal, yo.
When you get the guys round, when you're fucking each other in the ass, it's basically just jacking it because it's not gay.
Okay.
That's the important thing.
That truly is the same argument.
It's not gay if you say no homo beforehand.
If you can prison, you get a pass because there's nothing else going on.
So, you know, Holy shit.
Yeah.
Roger, Roger Scruton's philosophy is just basically no homo.
I would love it if that was the content of his book that was called something like.
On sexuality.
It was called like on aesthetic ideas of personhood and beauty.
And then the first page is like, if you scream no homo, it's fine.
Jacking it for intelligent people.
Roger Scruton is definitely a person who has who's who like has a posh wank as like a daily thing.
He powders his fingers.
He's got like a reusable condom from the 20s.
He like, he like, he washes out and keeps in cornflour.
Do you know what he does?
He sterilizes it in Milton.
As a new mother, I can tell you it's the cheapest, best way to sterilize you.
He wouldn't just sterilize anything on the cheap.
He's a fancy man.
He believes in the right of some people to be fancy.
Trash Future is sponsored by Milton Disinfected Rights.
Do you live in a filthy leftism den?
Trash Future is actually sponsored by Ako, the Japanese restaurant near me,
where the owner said I could have a free dinner if I said this.
Wow.
It's really good.
It's on Broadway market.
I think this counts as misusing the podcast.
Shut up.
Do you know who he looks like?
He looks like Kathy Bates.
But Kathy Bates, if she was like playing a very particular part,
like if Kathy Bates was playing a 17th century lord,
which I would commission.
Sorry, this is such a waste of all of our time.
The one who was in fried green tomato.
Yeah.
Oh, no.
Maybe he looks like Tilda Swinton.
What I'm saying is he could definitely be playing Tilda Swinton.
He looks exactly like Tilda Swinton.
Sorry.
Holy shit.
No, yeah.
I'm seeing it in my head right now.
So fascist Tilda Swinton has been appointed the head of this commission.
It's like, what if Tilda Swinton was playing John Hurt?
You get Roger Scruton.
Like in my mind, the sort of the two targeting radicals
that have been just sort of dancing around Roger Scruton,
because I'm piloting a Gundam,
have just like locked together and I've got the beep
that lets me know I'm target locked.
He's Tilda Swinton playing John Hurt.
So here's one of the other terrible things he has claimed.
Date rape isn't a real thing.
It's just the man moving too quickly
through the process of courtship.
It's a made up concept.
Sexual harassment is just a sexual advance
made by an ugly person.
And that an international jury is inherently opposed
to the nation state project.
So this is the guy.
That's a take.
And the conservatives, when questioned on all of this,
when pulled up on all of it,
said that Roger Scruton is a public intellectual
and an experienced estate,
and we are glad to have him on the commission.
An experienced estate.
Have you looked at his hair?
Also, that's the word.
You don't want an inexperienced estate.
Absolutely not.
You know, somebody's like,
I see one beautiful thing.
That's all I've ever seen.
One.
I don't know nothing about no beauty.
Yeah.
I've got one couch.
I think that's a nice ass, but like,
I'm not sure.
I've not seen that many.
And some of them definitely weren't good.
But also like if it's really fucking
galling that they're coming out being like,
all of these buildings that have just been
hurried out just for money making,
we need to stop.
It's like, you've been in government.
It's like in London,
it was fucking Boris Johnson there.
Did it guys?
You've done it.
Here's the thing.
The corner's coming from inside the house.
I'll do a little preview on what this commission's
interested in.
What they're actually interested in doing
is preventing the development of lots of homes
so that instead we can have fancy
Georgian terrace houses and charming little cottages.
They want to restrict the amount of homes
we're going to build so that we can have
ones that are from the past.
Wait, are you saying that cottages are not
the future of urban planning?
That's roofing, surprisingly, is actually on the way out.
Can we have high rise cottages?
Well, there's just an apartment
and then a layer of thatch and then another apartment.
No, it's cottages built onto a metal super sculpture.
Oh yeah, that could work.
Then you don't have to compromise.
Josie and I are going into business.
We're going to become landlords.
I'm an experienced East Thief.
The East Thief.
That's like aesthetic.
My boyfriend said aesthetic was pronounced aesthetic.
Maybe you're thinking of aesthetic.
No, it is pronounced aesthetic.
That's right.
No, it fucking can't be.
It's got an H in it.
Roger, help us.
It's because it's from Greek
and the Greek theta wasn't really pronounced
like our T8.
It was more pronounced harder.
It was like an aspirated T.
It was like kind of...
Is that like aesthetic then?
Aesthetic.
I don't know.
I mean, it's of course also an anglicised pronunciation.
It's classical languages corner.
You tried to own me for saying Walter Benjamin last week.
Yes, because you can either call him Valter Benjamin
or you can call him Walter Benjamin.
You can't have it both ways.
I call him Wally Benz.
That's great.
That's better.
Official name from now on.
As my favourite Frankfurt school rapper said,
it's all about the Benjamin's.
Oh, wow.
Thank you, everybody.
That deserved exactly what it got.
So basically...
Don't you dare.
Nate.
No, don't do it.
Don't do it, Nate.
So basically what happened is he got announced this appointment.
People then went through all of the stuff he said,
gathered evidence that he is unfit to serve in a modern democracy
because he thinks that most of the people in it aren't people.
It would seem.
And so, of course, now of all of the welcoming Canada,
all the right wing outrage journalists that we've talked about,
AIs could write most of their articles,
accept the guy who leapt to Roger Scrutin's defense.
No AI could replicate the insane inward turn sociopathy of Toby Young.
Oh, yes, that's true.
Because Toby Young only writes about like Brendan O'Neill
who is a principled, principle-less person.
He wants to defend ideas.
The ideas are all terrible, but he wants to defend them.
He's consistent.
Yeah, Toby Young only writes about things that affect him personally.
He once wrote a whole article about him trying to ask his Alexa
who he was and getting mad at the Alexa for not knowing or something.
So this is him.
And he opened an article saying that we are not fit to lick Roger Scrutin's boots.
So Toby Young wrote an article in defense of Roger Scrutin
where he basically did his usual thing of saying
that all the online outrage architects have dug up a bunch of stuff
that has nothing to do with housing.
Okay, these are all the people who like, if you say, you know,
white people sunburn will try to get you fired from a sandwich artist position.
So it literally doesn't matter.
Only housing slurs are allowed.
Yeah.
I just thought of a really terrible joke and I'm not going to say it.
Toby Young and Roger Scrutin have something in common, which is they look like
like balls.
Yeah, they're both two balls adjacent.
No, that Roger, Toby Young is my balls before voting in the 2016 election.
Roger Scrutin is my balls after voting in the 2018 election.
Toby Young is just like dark Heston Blumenthal.
Like Heston Blumenthal gone wrong.
But what he wrote was, Ahem, or he quoted Roger Scrutin saying,
once identified as right wing, you're beyond the pale of argument.
Your views are irrelevant. Your character discredited.
Your presence in the world a mistake.
You're not an opponent to be argued with, but a disease to be shunned.
Which I say, yeah.
Yeah.
Firstly, yes, you have no friends.
It's been clearly documented and parody.
We've all read the articles. We've all laughed about it.
He's only there for day ones. He's not, you know.
But on top of that, like, why does he want people to like him so desperately?
It's so disgusting. Like, he's like, once you say you're right wing,
left wing people won't like you. It's not fair.
That's what he's saying.
Yeah.
Why do you want people to like you who don't agree with what you're saying?
All of these people want like government-issued friends.
Toby Young is one of the only people who,
whenever he's involved in a controversy,
journalists will phone up his friends for comment
and they'll go on the record just to clarify that they're not friends with Toby Young.
Toby Young and Regis Gritton have this idea of what it means to be an intellectual.
Yeah.
That he's basically like, something to do with Plato or something.
I haven't read it.
But that's them saying that.
That we're like, yeah.
To wear fancy suits, do wins and not ties.
Yes, exactly.
Stroke your beard.
They want to live in a rarefied world,
but they don't want to do the work and they're not clever enough to do the work.
It's not Plato's symposium.
It's not Plato's Republic.
It's Plato's symposium where it's just sitting around with the boys
talking about which young boys you'd like to fuck
and then getting yourself so horny that you have to go home and fuck your wife,
even though you think that's not worthy of you.
I mean, he's one of those guys who kind of like...
He's like, you know, back here.
I'm trying to think of what the phrase would be,
but someone who exists in a time that he's not part of.
It's Doug Brown from Back to the Future 3.
He is a guy who...
What really happened is he says he was radicalized by 1968
in the other direction where he decided he hated the movement and the revolution
and wanted...
He's like Neil Ferguson.
Neil Ferguson says this too.
He's just like, oh, I decided to be a rebel in the 70s and 80s,
so I became a faturite instead.
Hang on.
It's pronounced Neil, not Niall.
I don't know.
Hang on.
Aren't there two people?
Isn't there a Niall Ferguson and a Neil Ferguson?
We got it.
We don't have time for this kind of dispute.
He said he was disgusted by the idea of social change
and he wanted to preserve the gifts that Europe had given us.
I guess he was the annoying young Tory
who's trying to be overly precocious
and suck up to all the people he thinks are in power,
but is clearly just detested by all of them
who actually can pull a lever of power.
And he's waited 50 years
and now finally he's got three friends,
one of whom is Paul Joseph Watson.
That's like all his payoff of all this time.
And he's going to build a high-rise cottage.
You get to be friends with an angry man from Sheffield
who never leaves his house.
Was that Nick Clegg?
But his house is thatched.
You've mentioned that Scroodin actually is much beloved
of Paul Joseph Watson and the art, right?
And this is because of the way...
This is all because to do with architecture, right?
So our listener of the show, Sarah Manavis,
wrote a piece about this, which was very good,
but he's been documented for a while.
Come on the show, come on the show.
So it was basically this idea
that because these kind of online fascists,
they revere traditionalism.
So they call themselves traditionalists, right?
In the sense that they believe that women shouldn't work.
I mean, they're right. Look at me. I'm a mess.
I can't think.
No one should work.
Leftists also believe that their job should work.
Their job is to rear children and boil meat
and not eat Brazil nuts for lunch.
Is there a rule on how many?
Because I was very specific.
Show me the line. What's wrong with boiling meat?
So some of us live in guy households
and other people fantasize about living in like,
you know, old traditional houses,
but they're not really quite...
They're not really specific as to what that is,
because the interesting thing about Paul Joseph Watson is that
he lives in like one of those ugly new builds in Battersea.
Like, you know, those like Perspex glass new builds.
All the kind of management consultants buy in everything.
But credit to him.
He's really spruced it up with a nice map.
It really has a basement sheet to it.
So he lives in this apartment
and there are a couple of pictures of it on his Instagram.
And it's just like everything...
It's on Instagram.
He's on Instagram.
Oh, great.
He's on Instagram.
Look at his cooking.
It's like the funniest thing.
Is he doing influencer stuff for like lip balms?
Look how luscious it makes my lips.
He takes pictures of him making beans on toast.
Imagine my cock.
So anyway, like, yeah.
So he lives in one of these like really ugly new builds,
which like Roger Scruton would like, you know,
break down if like he had any strength
or like blood left in his body.
But it's kind of like part of this wider online movement
where they sort of fetishize like old buildings.
They hate brutalism like with a passion.
They hate brutalism like so much.
It's such an old take.
It's like a 40 year old take.
It is.
Cause I actually read...
I was reading an article about this in a design magazine
called Dazeen.
It's very good.
They were saying what he's done is he's basically still living
in the culture wars of the 80s.
All of these debates have been settled.
It's just there has been some curmudgeon,
like who again is grandpa Simpson.
Old man yells at cloud.
It's part of the whole thing.
It's also the reason why they hate cities so much, right?
And by extension, they hate the people who live in the cities
and who are the people who live in cities.
They hate England.
Poor people.
Poor black and minority ethnic people live in parts
of the cities where apartment blocks are
and where perspex built.
Not even perspex, but where those like old,
like, you know, brucelist buildings are, you know,
so for them that represents like these buildings represent
the ugliness that they see around them
and the way that you get rid of those problems is by getting rid
of the built environment that exists, you know,
anything that kind of reeks of...
And the thing about these types of flats is like,
what were they initially designed for?
They were designed as like social housing.
So the place where I grew up in Thames Mead,
like it's one of the first areas where there was a big kind
of social housing project that was built using kind
of breeze block, you know, breeze block estate material,
you know, and that's kind of one of the areas
that they really, really dislike,
but also is one of those places where it was designed
specifically for poor people to move into as affordable
areas in and around London.
Yeah, and that had social, come on, brain,
it had community aspects built into them
and was thoughtfully designed.
And the thing is they still exist.
Like one of the big things that's happening in Thames Mead
at the moment is the fact that you've got people,
you've got like communities who are fighting to kind
of keep those buildings up because they want to knock
from, you know, because developers want to knock from down
and do the whole thing where like 25% of it stays as
like social housing and the rest of it becomes
like private rented stuff.
Like is it Balfront?
Yeah, Balfront Tower in all saints.
Yeah.
It was next to the Robin Hood estate and they,
yeah, they did exactly that with,
they went, oh, this is the bit that we can market and sell.
So what we'll do is we'll force everyone out of it
and we'll allow the tiniest amount of people back here
in the most tenuous conditions.
It's very, it's very classic classism in like the most,
and this is the thing you're completely right in saying
that this is a very boring,
this is like one of the most boring parts of the culture was
because it has gone on for so long.
And it's irrelevant to what's being built now.
And it's not like, and it's ignoring deliberately
what's being built now and where the money is
and why the regulations have been so...
And this is where like the Scruton philosophy is really,
right? It's kind of like Scruton.
My man, Scruton.
Scruton as the most working class person
of the trash future host.
And that has a lot about like poverty.
I don't know, I grew up in Essex.
I didn't even grew up here.
Has anyone from very similar towns like
equidistant on either side of the Thames?
I'm from Harlow in Essex.
So before I have to bounce out again,
all I'm going to say is that...
Yeah, like for them, this is like very much...
This is like, this is an aesthetic war, right?
And it's one that's just rooted purely in aestheticism.
There is no kind of...
For them, architecture doesn't really serve a social purpose.
Homes don't really serve a social purpose.
The exteriors serve a aesthetic purpose for them
to kind of believe that like the world that they exist in
still exists in the way that they recognize it.
And this is really what it is.
It comes down to their fear of questioning who they are.
It's like this very strange existence
that they live in being projected onto poor people.
The thing about reactionary aesthetics, right,
is that they would still hate falling water.
Falling water is a luxury property built for a wealthy family
by a star architect, the guy who had a singular clarity of vision.
Someone who...
These kinds of people who think that individual genius moves
our world forward as opposed to like social compacts and powers,
they would love it, but they hate it
because they want kitschy bullshit.
They want to live in the world of Brideshead Revisited.
This is why when Hitler was painting,
he wasn't trying to like capture the sort of wild insanity
of the Dadaist movement.
He just wanted to paint nice cottages.
I love that this has also included a critique of the art of Hitler.
As if there aren't bigger things to criticize.
In case you're from the fence about that,
have you seen some of his bad paintings?
It's always unimaginative.
But fascism loves kitschy bullshit
because it's all about this return.
It's part of the anger of it as well
because they'll never be able to get what they want
because what they want is stupid and would never work.
It's imaginary.
Yeah, and so it's never going to be anything
but frustrating and making them angry.
They want to live in like one of those kids shows
where like a magical dog or a gnome takes you into the book.
They want to live in the world of Wishbone.
They want to live in a Richard Curtis film
but not for weddings in a few years.
And yet it seems like we live down.
They want to live in a Richard Curtis film
but we all live in an Adam Curtis film.
Meanwhile, on the other side of a podcast
in a seemingly unrelated incident.
No, it's in the other thing that these people do
which I think is like a running TF theme
or a T theme if we're going with the new abbreviation of the podcast
is that they're like, they're so insane
that they're almost close to having a woke opinion
but they look at all the evidence.
They draw the wrong conclusion.
So like they're saying things like
a lot of social housing in London
was like originally built to be temporary
and it's ugly and decaying and inadequate.
True.
Build better social housing.
Build social housing that looks nice.
Agree.
But like social housing that looks nice
doesn't have to look like a cottage.
You can build like nice modern
architecturally practical buildings that also look nice.
I mean, for example, like if you go to Victoria Station
in London, there's like a horrific building
that was built in the 80s out of concrete and glass
which genuinely looks like something from
the fucking crystal maze
and it's like one of the worst things I've ever seen.
Oh, not even the good zones.
No.
And next to it there's like a perfectly nice
like glass and steel office block
like inoffensive looking.
Like there's like a great example of like
but Roger Scruton would hate both.
Yeah.
Like for the sin of being recent.
But also would be useful to people
who want to bash certain sectors of society
and they would ignore the fact that like
developers were mercilessly allowed to build things
that were socially exclusionary and ugly
during Boris Johnson's mayoralty.
That was a hard sentence to say.
Yeah.
So if an important, like every important sentence
it was hard to say.
Exactly.
But I said it.
And that's why Brendan O'Neill
defends your rights to speak.
He wouldn't defend any of our rights to say anything.
So this is...
Brendan O'Neill loves something in all of us.
Quoting from that article,
they say this commission that he's been appointed
the head of, surprise, surprise,
is a quote vehicle for a patently ideological program
to attack contemporary housing
and undermine the architecture
that underpins social democracy.
It wants to erase the agency of architecture and planning
that have hard wire progressive ideas
into the fabric of the world.
For example, plentiful, safe, accessible housing
and seeks to enforce a singular a historical fantasy
featuring a few fragments of architectural reference
that appeal to blinkered quasi-fascist old white men.
Who said this?
Because I love it.
Is that you?
No, it was...
I'll link the article in the description.
It was...
It's a fantastic article.
I absolutely thrilled.
Thank you for writing that whoever you are.
It's punchy.
It's good.
I agree with it.
It sounds...
And here's the...
Whoever wrote that,
you could have a date on your hands.
We're asked to play a silly game
where we look at a crap glass and steel commercial building
next to a crap fiberglass Palladian one
and decide which one looks nicer.
No one's talked about this since the 1980s.
Roger Scrutin is an irrelevant C
and yet this government has decided to elevate him
because that's what they think the problem of housing is,
is that it's not sort of beautiful and genteel
and cottagey and Palladian enough.
Not that people are homeless.
Yeah, not that they haven't built
any social fucking housing for 15 years.
It's the same pop.
It's the poppy logic, really,
which is like friend of the show Aaron Bistani
has been getting dragged on Twitter all day
because he said the poppy appeal is worthless
if it doesn't rehouse veterans.
Why don't you just build homes for veterans?
Why is it more important that you virtue signal,
which is that's what it is.
That's what virtue signaling is.
So to agree with these metimes.
And a literal, true, but in a literal sense,
we'll leave that.
And is it more important to actually build homes for veterans
or have a poppy?
And everyone's like, oh, you don't support the troops
because they're all really dumb.
But that's his, that's the same thing where he's like,
oh, is it more important to have a Palladian facade
on like a playroom for your teddy bear
that used to be on like, you know, where people lived?
Roger Scrooge would totally have a playroom.
I was just imagining him and Toby Young together
dressing up some teddy bears and putting them in a line
and calling them things like Professor Snuffles
and like having a debate with the teddy bears.
And this is why we had the British Empire
was so we could support this kind of lifestyle.
100% true.
And there's the weird thing,
the conservative aesthetic arguments,
they go back as many sort of bullshit arguments
about conservatism due to Edmund Burke,
where he was like, look, we need to have a stratified society
so that the aristocrats can appreciate
and generate beautiful things for everyone to then consume.
Sure, makes perfect sense.
Roger Scrooge wants to live in like the Court of Versailles
and die in like 1750.
That's where he's most at home, just playing the harpsichord
and wearing a ridiculous like AC Grayling wig.
And does not need a wig.
And talking to everyone about, yes, the nature of fine cheese.
It can be found in a beautiful melody or song or ghost.
But this, the thing is this leads to him to convert these opinions
in just hatred of everything new reflexively
into his social politics as well.
So I pulled up a quote from him from an interview a few years ago,
saying his problem with social liberalism was this.
Do I leave others unharmed?
He says, when I destroy my capacity for personal relationships
through drug taking, promiscuity or porn addiction.
Roger Scrooge doesn't do anything that cool.
Do I leave them unharmed when I stupefied myself with pop music?
Oh God. Oh, thank God he's reigniting this 1950s debate.
Oh my God. How is this relevant?
He's not even blaming video games.
Like he's not even up to the 90s.
Roger Scrooge really hates Charlie X.
He's found in all career on that basis.
But this is first year English student carrying a cane as an affectation guy.
I only listen to classical music actually.
Yeah, but he doesn't listen to radio three because that's too challenging.
He listens to classic FM.
So at least those fucking adverts and they play the same old shit.
That's what it is.
He would want to say that he listened to classical music,
but he wouldn't be interested in anything that was avant-garde.
And he wouldn't really want to engage with classical music.
Like it's fake intellectualism.
He just listens to the same.
He just listens to all these spring because it's so accessible.
He listens to the shit.
He's the fucking most boring turd bullshit.
He's always walking up to all the girls in class being like,
pop music, what do you guys listen to your Miley Cyrus?
I like Vivaldi.
He's on the YouTube comments for the big bopper's greatest hits going,
I'm only 12 and I think this is great.
I was born in the wrong generation.
He says, youth culture is an effect of social destruction,
not necessarily the cause of it.
But there's another culture of youth which is not destructive at all.
The attempt to recover folk music, natural dancing and so on.
Oh yes, incredibly normal dancing, which people do to folk music,
involving dressing up in white and putting bells on your knees
and like smacking each other with sticks.
Yeah, it's the most natural form of dancing.
He's like, oh, I don't like all that singing about bitches and hoes.
He has a Sean Bailey opinion of rap music.
He's like, I don't like singing about bitches and hoes.
I wish that people and kids could go to the club and Morris dance.
Okay, but there is a thing that is fucking with young people and that's YouTube.
But he doesn't speak out against that because YouTube
is all telling him he's good, right?
So he should be saying, well, children are literally being told
about Holocaust denial on YouTube.
That's bad, but instead he's like, I'm thrilled about that.
Maybe we could get them to wear blackface,
not in a blackface way, in a folk dancing way.
So is he pro or anti the Tory councillor
wearing blackface at the firework demonstration?
Pro, 100% because he would not want that judged
in the context of existing in context of the world.
He would say, well, in 1593 people blacked up and it was fine.
I have it. I think I have it.
I think because he's pro-tradition, he'd be like, well, I'm for the tradition,
but he could have used a finer paint.
That wraps up this week's episode of Scrutin' Under Scrutiny.
And so ultimately, you know, I'll sort of conclude this section
with how the article concludes.
Our housing crisis has almost nothing to do with aesthetics,
modern, traditional, but rather is to do with land, wealth and exploitation.
This whole commission is an easy distraction from far bigger problems
that the government have no intention of doing anything about.
I just let's say I really agree with you.
Just keep saying things.
My DMs are open.
Right. So Roger Scrutin, fuck off.
You are a complete irrelevancy and the only people who like you
are basement dwelling nerds who sort of all,
all of whom carry affectation canes.
Some of whom own nice maps.
Some of whom own nice maps.
And I guess others of whom are in government.
Cool. Very, very awesome guys.
Pacement dwelling nerds in government.
Which, which government departments are in the basement?
That's what I want to know.
Michael Gove, I can imagine has a full set of Roger Scrutin books
hard bound in folio boxes that he's never fucking opened.
That's, that's what we have there.
They're all just like hollowed out and he like keeps hip flasks in them.
That's the Roger Scrutin grift.
Is none of the books have anything in them,
but no one would buy a Roger Scrutin book would ever open the book.
Do you know what I like about that?
It's one of the books is called how to be a conservative.
And all I've been doing since finding that out is just imagining like
inside the book it just says like being a cunt or something like,
you know, it's just like a big picture of an hour.
It's, it's, it's how to be, how to be a conservative is just basically
to say that you don't like pop music.
So I wish people would folk dance more.
Do natural dancing as he called it.
Yeah.
Oh, so he doesn't want, he doesn't really care about folk dancing.
Like he wouldn't go and watch Morris dancing and be like,
bravo.
He doesn't want to engage with anything in any meaningful sense.
I imagine.
I'm just imagining like the taking the idea that no one has ever read
a Roger Scrutin book further than the inside of every Roger Scrutin book.
It's just like a randomly chosen other book that's had the text copy.
And like one of them is just me and my brothers by Charles Cray.
On the way, on the way back here from my, from my other outing,
I just remembered that there was like the people who read Roger Scrutin,
the ones who recommended that I read Roger Scrutin were all like young Tories.
And this was like young Tories back in 2010 to first like during the coalition years.
Before the SoundCloud rapper.
Yeah.
Do you remember there was a documentary about like young Tories that came out
around about time?
Yeah.
Because someone, someone I'd met at Cambridge was on it.
Yeah.
So he was, so they were, they were part of that whole circle.
So yeah, I'll just end it there because I know that.
So that's, that's my story.
That's my tale.
No, I was really interested.
I'm sorry.
I think that's it for us today.
As you get you hogs.
As ever, we have a Patreon.
You can sign up to it.
Debate me.
Debate me too.
Yeah.
We have a debate me tier.
If you want to argue with us, we'll never argue with you until you sign up for the debate me tier.
How much is it?
And one payment goes $25 a month.
Yes.
I'm pretty sure, I'm pretty sure there are a couple of people who have signed up for it
just because they were so mad, but like they desperately wanted to debate.
The only person I'll argue with is like the weird, the weird centrist dad guy who blocked
me because he just kept asking me if I thought my jokes were really funny.
And then I told him to eat my boy pussy.
And then he started arguing with you guys and like much the same thing happened.
And now I want him to unblock me so I can tell him to eat my boy pussy.
He messages me now because he is just like, what do you have against wives?
You're in the bucket of big wives.
I got to, I got to yank this back on course because we need to say you got to sign up to
that Patreon.
You get the second episode a week.
We got some good stuff coming out.
We have some good stuff in the back.
You can learn some bad stuff coming out.
You can learn why we keep saying guy household.
Yeah.
Also, I want to thank Josie.
Thank you very much for coming on.
Guys, it's my real pleasure to come be unfunny and sincere to railroad your quips.
I just want you to know I'm thrilled to be out the house.
I'd like the young internet.
Do you know what I realized about Twitter especially?
It's about 20 people whose opinions I care about and it's like all of like, like rat,
like a small section of left Twitter.
Everyone else.
I will just be like, fuck off you daft cunt, especially now I'm a mother.
Please start a podcast and call it that.
And also you can commodify your descent with a t-shirt from a little comrade.
Edie, as you know, will print anything you want on the t-shirt.
Why not get your favorite Roger Scrutin quote.
One of the terrible things he thinks maybe, but put quotations around marks around it
or it's not irony.
Because, because, because, because, because of the terrible things he thinks anyway.
Yeah.
He know that.
Oh, he is definitely a Wizard of Oz type.
We didn't milk that enough.
And finally, thank you to Jinsang for the use of our theme song.
It's called Here We Go.
You can find it on Spotify.
It's extremely good.
And yeah, that's gonna be.
Slaps as hard as Vivaldi.
It's been fucking slaps as hard as Vivaldi.
Roger Scrutin hates it.
Local Scrutin's hate this song.
Good night, everybody.
Good night.
Bye.