TRASHFUTURE - Tony the Tapeworm (A Sweet and Good Minisode With the "Boys")

Episode Date: August 11, 2017

MINI-SODE ALERT! FULL 'SODE NEXT WEEK! The Garbagemen Riley (@raaleh), Milo (@milo_edwards), and Charlie (a digital hermit) sat down to discuss a lot of the funniest and best takes on the Hellscape of... Late Stage Capitalism (tm), but the internet crapped out after a short period of time. I suspect a fiendish plot to make me stop posting. But we nonetheless managed to salvage a fun little snippet of our meeting of the minds - it may sound like we're doing racist caricatures of Italian American accents, but those are our real "no foolin" voices. Eyyyyyy my real name-a-duccio is Broshoot Fugghedabowdit. Like and subscribe on facebook, follow us on twitter @trashfuturepodcast, and other than that, grind yourself to dust under the boot heel of the Business Industry until we're back with in full effect next week.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 It's I feel like it's either it's either like some weird like tech thing which is what it's likely to be or it is like one of those like cutesy names they give to sex toys they're trying to sell to women like the Tobala can fit entirely inside Uranus and you'll barely even notice it's in there until you turn it on oh i see yeah i was gonna say that's very bad sex toy you slightly want to notice it's there is it essentially the emperor's new dildo but does the tape worm is like the original sex toy you'll barely notice it's inside you for months and then pull it out of Uranus let's even know you grab a ghoul that's actually another aspect of this garamuchi system lose weight
Starting point is 00:01:00 instantly by ingesting a tape worm it's your uncle it's it's your uncle it's your uncle Paulie well his full name is Paulie Tapeworm Tape de Liano Tape wormily uneasy it's so easy to lose weight they put it right in the name we should have seen it from the start so your your grandfather Tony he wanted to make this guy sign the contract and the guy says he's not gonna sign the contract so then your uncle Paulie Tape wormily uneasy he goes and gets inside the guy and eats out the lining of the guy's stomach until he signs the contract you know that was our business was done ever since i couldn't remember i always wanted to be a tapeworm you see those guys in there Cadillacs and the Chevrolet's and they'll be
Starting point is 00:01:53 dry and then we're going around climbing down people's throats usually disguised in subpar meat and they crawl out of the guy's veins in subpar capicollo you see you see you see Jimmy the gent we couldn't get made because we were only half tapeworm oh man a half tapeworm a half virus so okay so the tovala is it a tapeworm like is that your guess is it a tapeworm that's connected to the internet of things is there another kind of internet um no the internet of things is like the internet but with like shite oh okay um so it's the internet of concept is it a tapeworm that you can remotely control so you can decide uh which bits of your food that it eats so you don't have to fully digest it it's tapeworm but with no oh okay so are we
Starting point is 00:02:47 basically saying it's either an internet of things enabled tapeworm or a tapeworm dating app it might be both uh-huh an internet of things enabled tapeworm dating app does it sell your eating data to subway you

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