Triforce! - Nordrassil Radio Interview (uncut, long!)

Episode Date: November 27, 2010

Stayven of Ensidia interviews Lewis and Simon in a long session. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Pickaxe. won't find anywhere else. Experience the excitement of the casino floor right on your phone. Download the app and play whatever, wherever, and whenever. Your options for fun are endless. On DraftKings Casino, your way is the only way to play. Join the fun on your time, in your space, and within your means. The best part is it's safe, secure, and reliable. So deposits and withdrawals happen when you're ready. Go all in on fun with DraftKings Casino. Head to the App Store to download.
Starting point is 00:00:47 Explore a full suite of games and find your favorites today. DraftKings Casino, the crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call Connex Ontario, 1-866-531-2600. 19 and over and physically present in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. See casino.draftkings.com for details. Please play responsibly. Maple syrup, we love you,
Starting point is 00:01:10 but Canada is way more. It's poutine. Mixed with kimchi, maple syrup on Halo Halo, Montreal-style bagels eaten in Brandon, Manitoba. Here, we take the best from one side of the world and mix it with the other.
Starting point is 00:01:27 And you can shop that whole world right here in our aisles. Find it all here with more ways to save at Real Canadian Superstore. You are listening to Nordicil Radio. Thank you. ¶¶ A Okay, welcome to Nordsjord Radio. This is obviously the host for tonight, DJ Staven, on tonight's special show of How to Yogcast. With me tonight, joining me are obviously Lewis and Simon. Hello. Hello. Hello and welcome.
Starting point is 00:03:37 As everyone most likely knows, they are the hosts of Yogcast, which is awesome. So, to start off then. It's okay. Yogcast, which is awesome. So, to start off then, Yogcast. I'm pretty sure I said that, but I don't know. I'm speaking fast. Play it back and check. We can. This is true.
Starting point is 00:03:54 Let's just start over again. When the podcast is uploaded, we can check it to see. With me tonight is Lewis and Simon on the Yogcast. Hello. And, um... So, yes, nothing happened. Basically, to start off then, I'll start with Simon. Tell me a bit about yourself and Yogscast, just to start us off.
Starting point is 00:04:23 Yes, I'm Simon. Hello. I'm known as Honeydew on the internet. I play a hunter, which is named Honeybeard. If you can see, there's a theme running through the names there. I don't really do much for the Yogscast, to be honest. It's Lewis that does all the work. He works his little ass off. He certainly does
Starting point is 00:04:45 his little bony ass his little hairless ass and your hairy ass is the star of the show i'm i'm merely the man who puts you on the internet so everyone can enjoy you like a you're like the conduit yeah i'm like the trumpet and you're the the voice behind it blowing i was going to say voices don't actually do anything to a trumpet it's someone making like a pop sound with their lips pursed which pretty much sounds like a cast really Hmm. Which pretty much amplifies it. It's basically us in the nutshell right there. Just as a little disclaimer, I wouldn't always say this
Starting point is 00:05:29 before we start, but I kind of forgot. This show may contain some explicit language and things that you may not want to hear as a little kid. So, warning! Did we swear already then? I usually bleep Simon's explicit lyrics out. I was careful. I was very careful. We don't i usually probably simon's explicit lyrics out i was careful i was
Starting point is 00:05:46 very careful um we don't need to bother now we said a disclaimer so we're free to say whatever the fuck we want doesn't say anything so permission like that great it's the last time right the last time i did an interview on the radio was in cardiff when i was at university there and i was being interviewed because I did a radio play which is long forgotten long lost in the mists of time and the guy who's interviewing me um took me off the air and asked me to leave because he interrupted an Alanis Morissette song by talking over it and I called him a bastard. So, interesting anecdote there. We should find this and post this radio play online because I'm sure it will be very interesting
Starting point is 00:06:34 to listen to. I'd cry young Simon. They're gone, they're lost forever. It's like those Lost Dad's Army episodes. It is, yeah. And people like put help you to people well I get did you recall that's all the way to the solid ninety seventy-four and it's a it the team of people will be like remastering
Starting point is 00:06:56 some granny or sending like cassette type your hard if radio in my people yeah your and he's got it I proper all you know good good old VCRs, you know ah, those were the days oh man I don't miss those days, I don't miss them I like streaming films obviously I pay for them
Starting point is 00:07:16 yeah, sure, sure you do, sure of course I do everyone pays for everything here none of us has ever downloaded anything illegally ever. No. And yeah, we're all saints. Boring anecdote of time if you're interested. Oh god.
Starting point is 00:07:31 You know my Fallout New Vegas that I got the other day? I went to install it with the CD and I realized my CD drive on my computer doesn't, like it's plugged in, so I never ever ever used it for anything. I plugged in a drive with Windows installed on it and so I've never used the CD. But I downloaded it on Steam in about half an hour so in fact it was actually quicker than installing it from CD in any way. What internet do you guys use? What ISPs are we on?
Starting point is 00:08:01 Yeah, same thing. We're on Virgin. Yeah, we're on Virgin. Well, we're not on Virgin, but I am on Virgin. What speeds are you at? Because I know England tends to be kind of shite for internet speed. I've got 50 meg, which is kind of handy for the uploading. Yeah. Simon's on like the cheapest one that you can afford. I'm on like 10, yeah. Oh God. It's enough for me to watch the Yogscast.
Starting point is 00:08:30 And that's about it. The reason I was asking is because I always find it annoying where someone in Sweden says, oh, what internet have you got? I've got a 20 meg internet connection. I'm paying about, what, 20, 25 pounds a month. He's like alright fair enough Well, I'm paying about 15 euros a month for about 150 meg and it's like you bastard If you're in Sweden, they have like
Starting point is 00:08:56 Ridiculous ridiculous. Yeah, it's mental and for much cheaper than our shitty connections, which always annoys me Sweden's basically paradise, isn't it? You get like a free sauna with your flat. There's blonde girls everywhere, there's saunas. This is true. It's full of meeples. Everyone's good looking. Everyone's good looking in Sweden, I've found.
Starting point is 00:09:16 How about Rithian? He's a bit rough. I'm not sure what I am. You haven't seen Morphar yet, it's a shame he's not listening otherwise I could do more widdycooling. Morphar is Swedish. I think it's racist to do that actually. Yeah. You can't do that, you can't mock people for how they talk. Heavens above.
Starting point is 00:09:41 No, I'm sure no one would ever do that. Especially not Team America. With a Doka Doka Muhammad Jihad. Oh no, just because they did it doesn't mean it's right. No. What? No, but it's not classed as racism when I'm repeating a quote from a movie. Right, we should move on from casual racism. Look, it's not your show Lewis. You don't get to put the shot.
Starting point is 00:10:05 On an unrelated matter, we should move on from casual racism. Okay, I agree Batman, that's a good statement. Yes, exactly. So what topics are we covering in this illustrious review? Everything. I remember having some fun with you guys on beta the other day when you were taming your army of scorpions. Oh, yeah, the Jaffas. And setting them upon me. Yeah, well, that was after we tamed the Jaffasaurus army.
Starting point is 00:10:32 Jaffasaurize. And unleash them on an unexpected low-level horde. Yeah, we killed those scorpions, didn't we? I think Simon tamed about 50 worms in Silithus after that, didn't you? Yeah. I wanted to tame a worm, and I kind of forgot that with the tame beast bug, you can actually tame any pet anywhere, as long as you've got it in your cool pet thing.
Starting point is 00:10:58 You can just use any trash pet to tame an army of the pets that you want. So I flew all the way to Silithus, tamed like 12 of these worms, and then I realised that I was just stuck in Silithus with all these worms. So I started, I went at war with the Cenarion Circle and I attacked Cenarion Hold. And didn't you get killed by a level 85 guard? Yeah, the guards are now at level 85 35 my pets had about 6k health their base health and that was funny I remember doing with the scorpions where
Starting point is 00:11:30 we were dueling and you just like testing the damage and stuff on me and I was begging you to pop thorns and you're gonna move on to like fine like thorns and they all die apart from the real one we just got like 90,000 health where's everyone else s6 it looks cool not a virus bug is it? No. It looks cool. It does, yeah. You can pretend to be Ronin with your raptor army. See I didn't know about that. I didn't know he had a raptor army.
Starting point is 00:11:54 Stapen, do you have like a bookshelf full of World of Warcraft fiction in your room? No, I don't but I have read all of the World of Warcraft books and I do love all the lore. And, um... Yeah. I'm kind of sad in that way. I am a very big nerd, but then that's why I'm an insidia. It's because I'm a nerd. How much of the shattering and all the really cool lore are we going to miss as an ordinary WoW player?
Starting point is 00:12:26 If you don't buy her book, how much stuff is just you're going to wake up the next morning and Bane's taken over from Khan and Moira's in charge? The world's changed, and people in-game have got no idea what happened, and you have to read the books to find out. Well, it's not so detailed as that, really. I mean, they do explain a lot of it in game there has been a bit of um story there it's just it goes into so much more detail in the books and the books like explaining for example the war of the ancients where it's
Starting point is 00:12:57 about malfurion and illidan who are obviously brothers growing up and how they split into their different paths illidan being more dark magic Malfurion being the first night elf druid and being taught by Cenarius. Was it all over a girl? Was it all over Tyrande? Was that it? It pretty much was, but it was a bit deeper than that. She doesn't love me! She doesn't even look at me or know that I exist! I'm an exact demon hunter and become evil! And he got blessed by Sardurus,
Starting point is 00:13:25 which is why he had his eyes removed and became the blindfold on, but yet could see. She turned into a dwarf at the end there, did you notice? And he'll cry. Oh dear. Hey, you'll leave me? Yeah, sorry. A lot of people have been requesting you to do your voices, so feel free to, uh...
Starting point is 00:13:47 Oh god, okay. BY MERRITAN'S BEARD! Like that? There we go. Exactly what people are looking for, yeah. Yeah. Yes indeed. It's weird because my hunter is a female dwarf, but she's called Honeybeard.
Starting point is 00:14:02 Mmm. Which sounds a bit rude, really rude really well female dwarves too traditionally have beards in law just not on their face which is quite disturbing before the show okay fine let me rephrase that in law female drawers tend to have several beards oh my god the armpits there's beards there. Stop it. There's stashes as well. Yeah, you lift out your arm, you've got like a little goatee. It's like, yeah. Oh god. I'm not sure. I mean, like, I don't know,
Starting point is 00:14:36 like Tolkien's dwarves, female dwarves, did they have beards like back in the day when he first envisaged the dwarven race and everyone ripped off it. I think that Tolkien was innately sexist and he didn't even consider that female dwarves existed. And when someone called him on it, he said, oh, yeah, yeah, there are. They just look the same as the men. Ah. That's it, you see. I mean, ironically, in Lord of the Rings Online, I believe, there isn't actually a choice for a female dwarf.
Starting point is 00:15:04 There's female of other classes, other races, I believe, there isn't actually a choice for female dwarf. There's female of other classes, other races, but dwarf is, there's just dwarf. We tried to make them, didn't we, Lewis? When we played the free-to-play version. I made a lovely dwarven lady with a luxurious beard running down her front. Like a sort of worm. Oh, dear. A wormy beard.
Starting point is 00:15:24 That sounds delightful. Lovely. That's not the most attractive quality of a woman. Having a beard. Unless she's in a circus. And that isn't, no not really. The bearded lady. Mmm. It's not good. I don't know why you'd want to advertise the fact that you have a fat ass beard instead of shaving every day and making sure no one the hell knows. Okay, can we move on from beards? Look Lewis, you're not in charge!
Starting point is 00:15:52 When are you going to realise this? I would have cut that last bit out of the latest Jog Pod, you know. This is the kind of thing I think, when it goes, like, when we start talking about beards for too long, I always think, right, I need to- You can't! It's impossible to talk about beards for too long! Very interesting. That's actually quite, that interests me now. How much of, so how much do you tend to record for each of your yogpods and then how much do you have to cut
Starting point is 00:16:17 out? Is it like you record say an hour and you cut it down to ten minutes or something? One minute more like. This is the thing, we've been recording so many videos, and so much content's gone into those, that we just have nothing left over for Yoggpods. And the whole reason that we started the podcast is because it was like leftover material that didn't make it into the
Starting point is 00:16:38 videos. And um... Now we're stuck making like three, four videos a frickin' day. Do you like how I said freaking instead of fucking now? I was trying to be nice because you're on the radio. Just slipped up. No, no, carry on. Okay.
Starting point is 00:16:54 So yeah, yeah, we've, everything's gone into the videos. So we've not really had the content to make any podcasts and people are really upset. And I know I'm sorry sorry guys I'm really sorry but look we've got this instead isn't this great yeah we'll put there'll be like links will be you know saying download this this is our new podcast it's just a one-off though we put all the effort into it and we'll take all the glory for it as well well we'll be posting it on our website as well, alongside the Total Biscuit podcast.
Starting point is 00:17:29 There is one in the works, actually. I've been saving up a bit of material, so there is a podcast in the works. It's just that the podcasts do take a lot longer to edit, because they are longer. And also, I tend to want to make them a bit
Starting point is 00:17:43 more clean and easy to listen to. Whereas with a video, because you're watching a video, you know, you don't necessarily mind if there's sort of a few seconds of pause or we don't say anything. Or if we just ramble about guff. Whereas on the podcast, I try and, well, I don't cut that much guff out. It's mostly full of guff that's pretty much it. The pressure with when it's just audio is that everything like every single minute has to be entertaining and listenable but when it's a video people are occupied watching what's on screen so it doesn't matter you could just be making fart noises for ten minutes and you'd still
Starting point is 00:18:21 get shitload of views. Well that's exactly why we started doing the videos in the film because people were doing that on get shitload of views. Well that's exactly why we started doing the videos in the first place. Because people were doing that on YouTube, getting loads of views, for just making terrible, terrible content. And my philosophy is, if you see something and you think, I can do better than that, you often can. Um, so go ahead and do it. See, there we go. There's something inspirational for all you would-be YouTubers out there who are listening. Or anything. Any aspect of life. If you think I could do that, do it. And see where it takes...
Starting point is 00:18:53 I want to be an astronaut, Lewis. I want to be a dragon astronaut. See, that would take you up and down outer space as a dragon, which would be quite impressive. I want to be an actual dragon astronaut. That was my dream ever since I was a child. Why dragon? I like dragons. I just think it would be cool to be a dragon, and not just
Starting point is 00:19:15 any dragon, but a dragon astronaut. You'd have to wear a space suit and a helmet and everything, because dragons can't breathe in space, can they? That's just silly. Unless you're necessarily the aspect of magic, like Malygos, for example,
Starting point is 00:19:30 and you could magic up some space-breathing spell. Well, no, but the thing is, we're very scientifically minded, you know. Simon talks about Cardiff University. He was studying astrophysics. My job is a science journalist. We think about things on a very logical and triple level. I mean, if you think about a dragon astral, right? The dragon's scaly skin would probably be sufficient
Starting point is 00:19:53 to be a space suit. I mean, it would probably hold the pressure of space. That is true. They have very powerful, not underbelly. Very cold. No, you wouldn't know. They might need- Simon, come on, you don't get cold in space.
Starting point is 00:20:04 It's not- It is, it's cold. It's heat. It's really cold out there't get cold in space it's no it's cold it's pretty cold out there it's not it's not it's just how's the heat transfer work what's haley's comet made out of lewis ice ah all right you got me now when haley's comet was made by God it was water right he makes space and so it's very cold so yeah that we just threw a snowball oh we might have done yeah he was he throwing it at though Satan yeah you think just melt Satan deflected it and it kind of went wreckage and that's why it did. You see, you threw it at Satan, Satan deflected it and it melted into like a ball of water which then went back into space and frozen has been circling
Starting point is 00:20:53 ever since. Is this like Squirtle versus Charizard? Charizard! Charizard. What's a Charizard? See, Simon missed Pokemon by about 15 years, therefore his knowledge of Pokemon is based on like spurious half education on what a Char Lizard is. Speaking of Pokemon, do you guys know what the Pokemon Blastoise looks like? That's the fully evolved form of Squirtle. Go Squirtle, Wartortle, then Blastoise. Do you have a shelf full of Pokemon models? No, I don't, but I used to play it when I was a lot younger.
Starting point is 00:21:31 But Blastoise is the big blue one with the big shell and has the two cannons out the back of it, the shell. Okay. That's interesting. What's that got to do with anything? I'm only mentioning it because if you look at the link that I just posted on IRC for the Google definition of a town called Castor, it says, Castor is a village in Belgium, part of the municipality of Anzagem.
Starting point is 00:21:54 I don't know how to pronounce that, but yeah. Recently, the town made headlines on a serial rapist dressed as a Blastoise Pokemon raped and killed 65 men. I don't think that's a true news story. I think it is. Yeah, I don't think that's a true news story. I think it is. Yeah, I don't think that's real. There's something about it that sort of sits wrong with me. I don't know what it is. But it's actually on Google definitions,
Starting point is 00:22:15 and it's been there for months, and they haven't removed it, which I thought they would have done. You're scratching your... I'm scratching my beard. I'm, like, pondering, going, hmm, something isn't right about this. But it's been there for ages.
Starting point is 00:22:31 I don't know if it is true or not, but it's just the way that... It probably is, but it just sounds awesome. It's someone's hack. Google. How would we have not heard about this if a man dressed as a Blastoise raped and killed
Starting point is 00:22:47 65 men in Holland? I kind of think it would have hit the international news. Well apparently it made headlines. No, I didn't see it on BBC. But I don't remember seeing it. If they didn't mention it on Radio 1 then I didn't hear about it. Chris Moyle didn't mention it. Well they probably can't mention rape too much on Radio 1. Of course they can. They can't just censor anything if it's a bit,
Starting point is 00:23:11 oh, you're a stupid scared of rape, we won't mention it then. Some people are quite sensitive. I mean, if there's a serial rapist on the loose, how would they handle it if they're not allowed to mention he's a rapist? Do they just speak as though they're talking to a child? A man dressed as he's a very bad man. There's a nasty man out there. Will you stay away from him? He's dressed as a giant turtle.
Starting point is 00:23:37 And if he offers you any sweets in the back of his van, just say no, okay? Like that. Now eat your bean. Anyway so oh god fun fun things you tell your children when you're at school you kind of were in the era where margaret thatcher was taking away your milk i think that was that was kind of the era in which you were brought up as a child. I mean, it's a different world today, Simon. It was an idyllic time. I mean, before Maggie Thatcher, there were no paedophiles and we had free milk. Yeah. And then Maggie Thatcher came into power.
Starting point is 00:24:15 Our milk was taken away, hence her being called, you know, Maggie Thatcher the Milk Snatcher. She snatched away my milk. Out of your poor toddler. Yeah. And suddenly there's like raging gangs of paedophiles. Dressed as Pokemon. Dressed as different Pokemon. All 151 Pokemon. Varieties. Yeah. See, it turns out, actually, with scientific research, that milk is actually a paedophilia suppressant. Which is why when she took it away the pedophilia rose you see okay yeah have you got it I think you need to citation needed yeah included as a footnote okay
Starting point is 00:25:01 yeah good so we've had we've had a puppy oh my god let's move on these topics oh my god casual racism uh in beards it's this guy's staving it's his fault he's yeah i blame staven poppy staven i heard a car a car a horse ran into your car and crushed your neck and that's why oh my god what happened what uh yeah i've not been able to work for quite a while in fact the 5th of november last year it's nearly a one year anniversary i had a car accident because there was wild horses where I live and dark country roads with bushes on the side of them and one ran out from behind a bush.
Starting point is 00:25:52 And I kind of hit it with my car because I couldn't stop in time. And my car was a two-seater soft top and the horse kind of landed on the roof. So, for all talkingah, waaaaaah! So, for all talking purposes, I can actually say I got hit over the head with a horse. My lovely, lovely, lovely horse, my lovely horse. It died. Running through the fields. So the horse died. How was the car? Was the car okay?
Starting point is 00:26:22 The car was written off, horse was dead, and I broke my neck in three places. All in all, there could have been a better outcome. Well, to be fair, the chance of me actually surviving was sub-1% without being paralysed or have any form of movement loss. So I'm pretty happy at the outcome. If I ever had to hit a horse and it had to hit me over the head, this is the way I'd like it to be done. I mean, what did you think was going to be the best outcome
Starting point is 00:26:45 of him crashing his car into a horse, Simon? That the car would be absolutely fine, there would be no damage, the horse would be, oh, sorry, would you like to have dinner? They had dinner and it was lovely, and the restaurant owner said, oh, you're the lucky millionth customer, here you go, it's a free meal.
Starting point is 00:26:59 Exactly. That would have been the best outcome. Unfortunately, I forgot to spray my car with the horse repellent, so it would have bounced off if I'd have remembered. I screwed up, you see. If you put turtle wax on it, the horse just would have slid past. It would have hit the bonnet and it just would have slid. Slided. It would have just slided over the car gently. Turtle wax?
Starting point is 00:27:24 Turtle wax. Is that obtainable? It's um, oh turtles. You have to pick a turtle's ear for ages and get all the ear wax out you know. Yeah, so it works. I'm surprised I haven't had to loop that in WoW at some point. Then like use it on some sort of a goblin contraption. Pet Blizzard listening to this going, ah, turtle wax! Put that down. Dwarf beard. Dave. Right, yeah, that's another one.
Starting point is 00:27:48 Trash, trash, trash, er, grey items, you know. So you killed a horse, basically. I did kill a horse. Fucking hell. Well, or, actually, the horse used me as an implement for suicide. Oh god! Oh god! I'm not sure that's true.
Starting point is 00:28:04 I don't think animals do commit suicide, do they? Oh god! Oh god! I'm not sure that's true. I don't think animals do commit suicide, do they? Lemmings do. Yeah, I think they do, because this horse ran right in front of my car when I was driving along about 40 and died. I mean, it didn't throw itself into the path of the car, did it? Basically, it was running and gonna go from behind this bush across the road road and I was driving down the road and we kind of intersected Which probably neither of us wanted to happen But I can now tell my children and grandchildren that one day I head-butted a horse so hard that I killed it
Starting point is 00:28:39 Wow Wow Story to tell That poor horse Running through the fields Yep. Wow. Story to tell. Poor horse. Running through the fields. So, were there any... Any questions? Have you killed any other animals?
Starting point is 00:28:52 Anything else? No, that's about all that I've killed. Maybe you need a goat in the face until it died. Maybe you need a goat in the face until it died. Maybe you need a goat in the face until it died. Did you curb stomp a hamster? Maybe, I don't know. God, Simon. There are animals.
Starting point is 00:29:10 Have you put a koi carp in a blender? I don't know. Christ. That would be kind of interesting, yeah. Put some sort of animal in a blender. No, it wouldn't. Will it blend? Explicit version. Oh dear. Will it blend? This is my kid's pet frog. Oh dear. Poor frogs.
Starting point is 00:29:30 Frog dust. Well. Will it blend? If you've ever seen that, it's awesome. They like blend everything. I don't know why they even call it will it blend because the answer is always yes, isn't it? It's something that you can do.
Starting point is 00:29:38 It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. It's a little bit of a trick. They like blend everything. I don't know why they even call it Will It Blend because the answer is always yes, isn't it? Of course, it's because it's got a diamond-tipped blade. It cuts anything.
Starting point is 00:29:54 What about other diamonds? That would be interesting. That's like what happens when the unstoppable force meets the immovable object. Yeah. happens when the unstoppable force meets the immovable object yeah and um right now if you try to blend diamonds in a in one of those will it blend blenders then it'll create a black hole and consume the world because that's what everyone says when they don't know like what's going to happen like with this large hydrogen collider they don't know what's going to happen it'll be a black hole and we'll die well no there's quite it's quite solid foundation. Oh fuck, here we go. Here we go. They're not just like, well we don't know what's going to happen.
Starting point is 00:30:28 Let's fuck around with science! Yes indeed. That actually reminded me of the beginning of your latest Halloween video. Oh god, yeah. Pretty scary. Wow. I'm a scary guy, aren't I? Fucking hell. Some would say that.
Starting point is 00:30:51 Sad face. But on the topic of the Large Hadron Collider, did you see that guy that time travelled, apparently? There was like a news postbc about someone that was claiming you just believe all this crap i don't believe it i just find it funny that they actually had an official post time travel no one time traveled in the lhc apparently he came back and he was trying to sabotage the lhc by stopping the supplies of mountain dew coming into this place boasting machines and it's like wow and um it did get blocked up didn't it there because like uh and yeah he he was taking responsibility for the pigeon dropping the piece of baguette in that lhc and breaking it
Starting point is 00:31:35 that's the true story yeah it is true story yeah but he took responsibility for it because apparently he didn't mind control pigeons that piece of baguette dropped by a seagull for sabotage of billion dollar physics projects? That's awesome. But the silly thing about the guy at the time travel was the fact that they said, yeah, he's obviously a bit bonkers, let's take him to this, like, they took him to quite a high profile mental institution. And then it says at the bottom, like, later that day, the guy disappeared from his cell, are baffled but not too bothered
Starting point is 00:32:07 which we're not too bothered disappeared from his cell i said it said it on the news post i want to see this stuff fine fine um sounds apocryphal now not now great apocryphal being code for a load of old arse. That's what it sounds like. Load of old arse. Load of old arse. Yes. For people that are interested, I will post a link, if it loads, in IRC shortly.
Starting point is 00:32:42 But to start off, let's start asking a few of the community questions that people have been asking over the last long time. Well, we've had our forum post up for ages. There's the link. And everything, people asking questions. So, the first question... By the way, Amaril, if you could post who the questions are from, so we could do a shout-out as well, that would be useful for future. How did you get into the beta? it part of being a fan site or just sheer luck um do you want me to take this one or do you want to take this one i think you can you can uh handle this one lewis you can handle this two of our friends um stalked a couple of blizzard
Starting point is 00:33:24 employees on facebook and managed to bag themselves beta invites by saying that they were me and Simon pretty much. No, not quite. And then they didn't tell us about it. They wanted to keep it quiet, right? So they were like, shh, don't tell Lewis and Simon that we've got beta invites. Actually, in fact, they had alpha invites. Yeah, yeah. We all got alpha, didn't we? And so... Through networking.
Starting point is 00:33:48 That's the way to say it. Through networking. So obviously they couldn't keep it quiet that they had alpha because they were, you know, ridiculous. And eventually they gave us access. But isn't that bonkers? Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:34:04 That's quite awesome. I was on alpha myself, Alpha was quite amusing. Some fun bugs. I mean, we didn't actually play. Simon, you were very anti-playing Alpha and I actually didn't have internet for about four weeks. So actually, I mean, we didn't really play at all until about two weeks after the beta started, by which time... There's not much you can do with Alpha though, because it is just so horribly bug-ridden, unfinished, nothing's implemented. It kind of spoils the experience a little bit, and I think that's how we sometimes... We used to feel about beta.
Starting point is 00:34:42 We felt that we didn't want to do it because it was kind of like playing an inferior version. It would kind of spoil it for us. I mean, at the stage right now, late beta, I mean, pretty much stuff is finished. The game's ready to go, it really is. I mean, when you kick off a release, there's always going to be some bugs hanging around. I remember there were quite a few quests that were still bugged at wrath release and ice crown had really just gone in and yeah you know you'll find those but they they're really the game it's such an enormous game i i'm i'm tempted to not even call world of warcraft a game anymore because it's more like a
Starting point is 00:35:17 hobby it's just i mean the game you buy you play for about a week or less and then you like put it on your shelf and you forget it's there that's a game, World of Warcraft is not a game it's just a job it's just a job I think some people think it's a job and when you start thinking it's a job it's probably time to have a break from it
Starting point is 00:35:37 but it's like a hobby really and it's something which is bigger than just a game it's just so enormous bigger than just a game. It's just so enormous, the amount of things that are involved. I mean, I've always found myself keep coming back to WoW over and over again because there's just things I miss in other games. We've always said that we really want an R&R mode to play and we keep trying. I mean, we do try, don't we, Simon?
Starting point is 00:36:03 We try fucking everything but nothing compares really so high five please that's a bit of a good promotion for you not that anyone who listens to this will disagree with me no obviously not but I mean so while we're on the subject of beta then I noticed you've done quite a few videos of like little instructional videos of some bosses. What do you think of Beta raiding so far? Oh it's hard. God, it's hard as nails man. Me and Simon went into Grim Batol yesterday. I've got a full heroically geared leveled paladin, and I'm not very good player
Starting point is 00:36:41 But I'm okay. Simon healed for like three years and he went in as a full heroically geared priest we've each got about 120k hit points we watched about four times get to the first boss and then wiped for about two hours on the first boss we kept bringing in new puppies obviously we were doing it in a pub and we kept replacing people we went through about six six or seven people we had some really good people like like Koreans, who were like ninjas. They were like, like stun locking shit. It was mental. They were really good,
Starting point is 00:37:09 but we couldn't kill the first boss and we just felt like... And that's not even a raid. That's just a five-man heroic. Yeah. Oh my God. We've done like boss previews, but the only one we've actually killed
Starting point is 00:37:22 is Halfas, the first boss of Bastion. And I didn't even fucking record that because I was so shocked that we actually managed to kill it um i started i thought fuck me we're actually gonna kill this guy and i pressed record i got the last couple of minutes of it but um we've we've tried almost all the bosses in ten man that we can get to um without having to kill prerequisites and um we've not managed to get any of them below about like 20, 10% fucking hell it's hard, really hard. Which ad did you get on Alphas?
Starting point is 00:37:53 Easy one. Oh, not the easy one, it's the little Drake cage and the other one but we, I mean... Because there's five total, I mean, because the one that I want to see, the timed one, the one that makes you can't move. Yeah, that's the one. I mean, you are a raider. You are, Ed Cydia, the best raider in the world. You are top level.
Starting point is 00:38:11 You've killed Chogar. You've killed Al'Akir. You've actually seen... Killed a horse. I mean, you are the top 0.01% of WoW players, and we are probably not even in the top 50%. We are pretty much... I doubt that.
Starting point is 00:38:29 I mean, we've killed old gods and all that since Vanilla. But we're not particularly skilled at WoW, and we don't pretend to be either. I've not killed the Lich King. I've not killed the Lich King. I've not killed Halion either. No, i've not killed the lich king i've not killed the lich king i've not killed halion either no i've not killed halion um i'm a nub i'm a big freaking nub well but i think you're not you're just a member of the well stand the amount of people who play well and love well but haven't been able to hit that really hard challenge with a proper 10-man group. Our guild group, our guild's Kungaloosh Anonymous on Revenge Co.
Starting point is 00:39:08 We've got a little 10-man scrub group going at the moment. I think they killed Sindragosa yesterday. Nice. And I think they've only got the Lich King left this week, and I think they were actually going to try and do it tonight. They were, yeah. If they had enough people, they were going to do it. We kind of are looking for more people actually so it's just like oh god
Starting point is 00:39:28 don't god don't advertise if you're interested in point is though we're obviously old as well I'm like 27 Simon you're 30 something um so I mean we don't really want to raid in a guild that's
Starting point is 00:39:44 going to have a lot of young people in it. So it's quite kind of, well not young people really, but like, you know, under 18s. And I think a lot of people say things to us like, you know, most of your viewer base is under 18. But that's not true. When you look at the statistics of the people who watch the Oggscast, only about 15% are under 18 in age. only about 15% are under 18 in age. So, you know, that's... I think a lot of the people who leave comments are probably under 18.
Starting point is 00:40:12 Judging by them, that's probably the case. Or just slightly mental in the head, which is cool. We like mental. Or both. So, yeah. If you're interested in joining Kungaloosh in Cataclysm send an email to yogscast
Starting point is 00:40:26 at gmail.com and say what your experience is and why you want to join because we could do with a few more people and it would be nice to get a few 10 lads together because at the moment we don't really have enough do we in the guild
Starting point is 00:40:42 no but I mean we'll see come Keter because we're going to have some people joining us. Yeah. But we'll see, we'll see. We're trying to keep quite tight. I mean, we're not sort of going to be prorating and doing it hours and hours a week kind of thing. It's not our priority.
Starting point is 00:41:07 I'm quite enjoying the beaters but it's quite interesting the way that some fights on the beat that are actually kind of difficult and they do well i mean the fights on the beta that i've noticed a lot of because obviously i've written um guides on manifla.com about every single beta boss raid bus so far um Maniflux.com about every single beta boss, raid boss so far. But it's more the fact that a lot of the bosses seem to be really hard if you don't know the mechanics. But once you actually know the mechanics and know what to do to counter them, it's not actually that bad,
Starting point is 00:41:42 whereas there's less mechanics that people can generally screw up on and more mechanics that you just purely have to learn to make it. I don't know. I mean, talking from a scrub perspective here, doing, like, not raiding with Insidia, the fights are not easy and we are, you know know raiding with a group of people who are okay and i mean you tend to get to a plateau on these fights you know if you you know the strategy you know exactly what the bosses do you know you're supposed to move out of that fire and you know avoid this and move out of that and all this but you know after a while even if you know the strategy exactly you're not guaranteed to kill it by any means. And certainly with something like
Starting point is 00:42:25 Turalyon and Valiona, we had so many, we spent so many hours on that boss and we didn't get it below 50%. Because there was always something that killed someone and it was horrible. It was utterly... I liked your video
Starting point is 00:42:41 where you got killed by a Void Zone. I hate that part. It just seems unfair, doesn't it there's just too much it's too unforgiving i mean fair enough yes if you stand in the fire you should die i i sort of agree with that but equally when you have like 70 fires coming at you and you have to avoid every single one and you're trying to heal the tank who's getting like two shot it's like uh i can't i i i'm i kind of like it felt like heroic heroic boss didn't it it didn't feel like a normal heroics let's uh make the normal bosses i will avoid fucking fire but i don't want to be killed by
Starting point is 00:43:20 seven other fires i want to be able be ironically there actually was a blue post the other day saying on the next beta build they're going to be buffing most normal bosses because i don't think it's not i cannot believe it but something interesting that you might not know about the thorallian and valiona fight is you know um it starts off with obviously valiona on the ground and thoroughly on flying and when it's just about to switch uh he shoots those void zones down which on the video they send you into the guide too yeah it's funny they send you into the twilight realm and there are ads in there that you have to kill for the meta achievement which adds a whole new point to the
Starting point is 00:43:55 fight i've never actually been in and we just normally just kill it because he wants to go to trigol or kill it for testing so i'm interested to see what actually happens if there's aoe damage in there or something and you have to actually have a healer and a tank go in or something. So it might actually be where you get your second tank in that fight from because at the moment even on 25 men you only need one. We can talk about achievements to a boo in the face but unless they make them account bound then I'm just not interested because I change my characters too often and I'm certainly not going to get, I have zero value for achievements if i don't share them across my
Starting point is 00:44:25 characters yeah i mean i've switched mains a lot i still sort of miss my warrior because i was a warrior main in tbc and switched to resto druid for wrath so i've got my warrior there with like the imani warbear and the netherwing drake and all the cool stuff and it's the like hand of a dal title and all this why aren't legendaries heirlooms by now? I want it to go into range. That would make them more valuable. Why aren't... Why is there one legendary per expansion? Why... I mean, fair enough, I understand the point. There was two in Wrath.
Starting point is 00:44:54 Or two. I mean, where's the tank legendary? There still hasn't been one, and Blizzard said at BlizzCon there's not gonna be one. And they said, oh, because there's only there's not enough tanks, or there's not enough... That's pretty lame, isn't it? lame that is pretty fucking lame you made one for hunters you made one for healers come on you can make one for fucking tanks just a ring i don't want to i don't want to like a shield i don't care about shield i want just something you just want something that's a
Starting point is 00:45:16 different color that's special you just want something orange i just want an orange very quickly go do kill fast there's orange right there go Jaffa Cake. Go do Kale Fast. Have a fucking Jaffa Cake. There's orange right there. Go Jaffa Cakes. I don't know. They're awesome. Not Kale Fast. Don't even mention him. But Jesus fucking Christ.
Starting point is 00:45:32 I'm just saying that it would be... I think that there's definitely room for another colour of item in WoW. And I'm surprised that it hasn't been put in. Because... I mean... Blues. No one really cares about blues german diablo though it'll just go to like white and a slightly different color of white if they keep going up you'll get really confusing i don't think they're going to keep going there has actually been a few
Starting point is 00:45:57 more like one new color per expansion wouldn't be ridiculous um yeah i think it's you you're just interested in items that are a different colour because it makes it special. Well, I mean, they've done it slightly by adding the little heroic tag beneath the purple. So you've got a heroic purple instead of a normal purple. Oh, yeah. They should just change the quality.
Starting point is 00:46:17 Make it like purple for them and the heroic ones have the same name but say the metallic if grey. How much more fucking awesome would it be if it wasn't purple heroic but it was like a different fucking colour? You know like pink. Yeah that's what I mean. Or not pink.
Starting point is 00:46:33 Pink! Right not pink. But I don't know. Do you know what I mean? How much more fucking awesome would that be if you were in full pink? You just want that. Than heroic. What the fuck is wrong with you?
Starting point is 00:46:46 If you make it pink and sparkly and you can leave like a glitter trail when you go walking on the street. There's too much text on iTunes. And have a set bonus when you get every part pink it starts playing that erasure song from that unicorn game. Which one is that? Oh man, it's like open your eyes or something. I'm not going to sing. Some of
Starting point is 00:47:05 these tooltips, right? I was playing when I went home at Christmas and I played like on my old computer. Wow. Some of the tooltips for like items were so long that they didn't actually fit on my screen. They had so much, the tooltips for items were so fucking long that it was like I moused over something and it filled up my whole screen. What the fuck? Come on, Blizz. Pull it out. Well, there we go. This is adding to my achievement of listening to Lewis round. This is good. I've got to be up to about 75 hours out of 100. I've got a lot to rant about. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be doing it. No, ranting's good. It's fun. And you know you're on about fire on Thuralion and Valiona?
Starting point is 00:47:47 You'd hate Nefarian. Oh Christ. Because there is fire that is... well basically he shoots fireballs on the floor that um, it's a patch of fire, and it grows in a ring, and just grows like to a massive ring and then despawns, and he starts casting them faster and faster as phase three goes on so um during the end you can get like two rings expanding towards you from either side and they do about 30k a second from 10 man it's pretty nasty that's on normal mode i'm actually very interested to see heroic modes because um the fights are actually kind of challenging and have good mechanics on normal but i think they can do so much of them on heroic and just make them so insane it'll just be so fun you're one of these
Starting point is 00:48:30 people who is like total biscuit though yeah you're exactly what i was thinking you love being you're a fucking masochist yeah you love spending hours and hours and hours and hours on one boss whereas you know we i just want to kill it get some purple i really don't like fucking life the thing i don't like is the wrath of the lich king mentality where it's like you go into a raid pug or something and you wipe once this group shit i'm leaving fucking and leave that's like one wipe and it's like no dude seriously try doing nax and original just no it's just i think that need a compromise you have to blizzard say that you should pick the person not the class you know you should be able to take anyone you want along with the raid doesn't that equally mean you can pick the person who isn't
Starting point is 00:49:17 quite as good as everyone else you know like the person with one arm right he's a really nice guy i want to bring him on my raid i don't want the way to be too hard i want to be on normal mode right if i want to balance everything around expecting everyone to have one arm one eye one leg and two fingers missing modes should be for normal right what's he called normal people don't they one arm. Right, alright. Not Sol-Jin. Not Sol-Jin. It's not Sol-Jin. It is. Zolomon Boss? Yeah, Zolomon Boss Sol-Jin. Um... But I mean, there are
Starting point is 00:49:54 people that do amazing things. Like there was a post in the Realm forums the other day about a guy that's blind who got like world first blind Kingslayer. Good for him. And there was a guy on MMO Champions I saw that has only one hand that managed to get over 1900 arena rating in 3v3 or something. Hang on, hang on, let's go back, let's go back, back. There's a Kingslayer and he's
Starting point is 00:50:12 blind. He plays World of Warcraft and he's blind. Yep. He plays Enhancement Shaman I believe. Is the screen like braille? How does it work? It's the new braille screen. Apparently he was on follow with someone. Follow me! You were waiting for that! You were waiting for that, weren't you? I knew it! You set that up! Set that up! I knew it was coming! I knew it was coming!
Starting point is 00:50:44 Follow me! Oh my god, Simon! It is impressive though that he managed it, because I mean, yeah, he's on follow with someone, so if he gets defiled that person can run him away, but apparently with defile and stuff he had to run away by himself, and he got teleported to the Frostmourne room in phase 3, because he was only in normal mode, and actually managed to do that in there fine without causing him enrage somehow. Shamozans just posted a link to that on irc what face roll cast does he play enhancement shame which is actually kind of hard but i mean how funny would
Starting point is 00:51:15 it be to just like log his account shaman that's why he's there but imagine how cool it would be if you log onto their account and like swap around all his key bindings because he wouldn't notice Oh my god, so I mean literally you could put like a rabbit in front of a keyboard and it can play an enhancement change Put bits of carrot Three and like WASD and that's it, you're sorted. And a slash follow macro, you know.
Starting point is 00:51:47 Rabbit gets world first, rabbit's Kingslayer. Oh that's the next one. Get someone's pet to get Kingslayer and post that on the forum as the new achievement. I mean they probably could have 24 manned it. Yeah, basically. Apparently Shamoz's cat killed Lich King. achievement I mean that they probably could a 24 man did yeah basically apparently Shamu's as cat killed licking I mean does it count because obviously like if you I've heard this I haven't actually done it but if you like pay like a guild like a Chinese bunch of guilds like farm you like items you know
Starting point is 00:52:18 they just you just run into instances and you know you die and then they kill the boss so we do that. Well, we obviously sold mounts for like 300,000 gold or something. Holy shit. Invincible, for example. And the Lich King, like, Light of the Dawn title for a couple of hundred thousand and all this. So it was kind of cool. But the way we do it is we originally had people
Starting point is 00:52:41 that we thought would be okay and they sort of came into the fight until you get someone that gets defiant, and like 15% in phase three, and goes, let's run to the tank, and causes a wipe, but like, at 15%, it's just like, dude, just go and die.
Starting point is 00:52:54 Go and die, and... Just fucking deal with it. If you're getting, you know, 300,000 gold, before you can even go. Yeah, but he caused a wipe. So what we did is, we just basically said in phase one, go and stand in front of the Shambling horrors get shockwaves and killed in
Starting point is 00:53:08 just jump off the end we can twenty four months was that it was now teleport you back up actually i don't know it was not as that it does not get in mind in in cacus jump off the edge of my anything get to the point back up in for the winds of the cn discuss cuz it's uh actually we did jump off into we did we actually we have jumped in quite a lot of lava this expansion of me Simon an unusual amount of lava well I got the achievement on beat of being killed by death wing today
Starting point is 00:53:38 oh I was just chilling and burning stats waiting for a raid and stuff and the deathwing suddenly yelled and everything suddenly went a scale darker. I was like, huh, let's go fly into his face and see if he breathes on me. Actually, Sabin, I believe it's called a feat of strength. It's not achievement, it's superior. Yes, and a feat of strength is a tab under the big box that says achievements at the top, which is part of the achievements their tension the tension between you two thing who
Starting point is 00:54:10 can be the biggest ranty nerd I'm not sure who's winning I think you're both I forfeit to be honest I still remember that that famous quote you know sort of arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics. Even if you win, you're still retarded. Yeah, it's true. Oh, dear. Okay, let's go through some of these questions, shall we? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:38 You're not in charge, Lewis. You're not in charge. All right. All right. Let's see. Where did Simon's obsession with Tinaina barrett first appear oh my god um wow uh do you know the answer to that because i do do you yeah i can't remember lewis well about two years ago or more maybe when we first started doing the videos uh it was my idea very early on to do a podcast and we actually recorded a podcast
Starting point is 00:55:14 um about about eight months before the very first podcast came out the the york's car your pod one snowcast whatever and it's like a pilot, and it's never been released. But in that, you were talking about Best Club 7, and that's actually where Tina Barrett comes from, because we were discussing it in that. And this is the legendary
Starting point is 00:55:38 Lost podcast. But I have got it somewhere, I think. I might put it up one day. You should upload it. It's not very good though. It's really, really boring actually. I was listening through thinking this isn't very good. So it's kind of good that we had sort of a practice run. I don't know if there is enough demand I might put it up just for nostalgic reasons. So in other words, everyone that's interested to hear this very first pilot podcast, make
Starting point is 00:56:07 yourselves known and ask for it. Oh my god. And if they get enough of it, they can post it. Yeah, that's it. We need more people fucking bitching to us about doing a podcast. Need that like, we need a hole in the head. Oh man. Oh, Vermoity.
Starting point is 00:56:21 Okay, next. Let's see, next question. Is it true that LaMardia is a better WoW player than both of you? Yeah. No. Yeah, yes it is. No, it isn't. No.
Starting point is 00:56:30 She levels a lot quicker than we do. Oh, right, that means she's a better player. Yeah, of course it does. That's the definition of a good player, how fast you level your character. It's a keyboard turn, friend. Sometimes. Everyone's seen me play. You can't be much worse than us.
Starting point is 00:56:46 When I'm RPing, i have the keyboard turn because it's just wrong to just instantly turn around like 180 degrees i back that's not how it works like a complete monkey so so many people have told me to like unbind my walk backwards key but then i just stand in fire at least i backpedal out of the fire backwards key but then I just stand in fire at least I backpedal out of the fire you're like why haven't we killed these bosses on the beat thing s fire Oh unbelievable unbelievable, there we go. Apparently, we've had about 50 people asking, Simon Lewis, do you have the balls? I am Simon exclamation mark,
Starting point is 00:57:37 Yognorth Prime, and I have the balls. That's true. Yep. I have the balls. So everyone has the balls. have we all have balls everyone yes test balls Hannah has the balls yeah yeah we have both sip those awesome apparently hand has made a comment on Facebook and said people to post there if they want to see the pilot episode. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:58:12 It's not very good, Hanna. It's not very good. Little deer. Well, we'll see. Let's see. What are your plans for the Yog cast? Yog's cast. See, blame Amariel there. He didn't put the S in. Let's see... What are your plans for the Yog cast? Yog's cast. See, blame Amariel there, he didn't put the S in.
Starting point is 00:58:30 After Cataclysm is released. Well obviously we've got plenty of things to do. We play all sorts of games all the time and there are some really good MMOs on the horizon that we'd like to play and cover. Much like we did with our Final Fantasy review thing. Oh my god, yeah. It was torture. Do you know, they're pretty good videos, though. They are pretty good videos. Did we tell you about...
Starting point is 00:58:58 The thing is, Final Fantasy XIV has a lower rating on Metacritic than APB. You know, that MMO, like GTA MMO? It was cancelled after two months. The servers were all going down after two months after release. Oh, my God. But we played APB. We just never put a video out. Because I think the reason was, when I actually played the beta of APB,
Starting point is 00:59:18 it was so fucking FPS laggy that I couldn't record it. And also, there were some hilarious bugs, and I wish I'd recorded them. One of them was I was playing this big black gangster rap with an enormous afro but the problem was, whenever I looked down my iron sights on my gun to shoot anyone, my afro actually just blocked the iron sights
Starting point is 00:59:37 and I couldn't shoot anyone except from the hip. I guess that's kind of what they wanted you to do then, I guess. Just like a proper gangster like shoot sideways but oh my god it was such a terrible fucking game I kind of think that would have been really
Starting point is 00:59:54 funny and Jogger would have loved watching us play that so that's the kind of thing we're probably going to do, not necessarily play terrible games but just play other games and just document our experience people have asked us to play terrible games, but just play other games. And just document our experience. People have asked us to play Minecraft and Simon's played
Starting point is 01:00:09 the fuck out of Minecraft. I haven't really played it very much but I've kind of been waiting for survival multiplayer because I think it would be a lot funnier if me and Simon could do survival multiplayer together. So Notch needs to get off his arse and sort that out but he has promised it so when that comes out... I have heard a lot of good things about my draft
Starting point is 01:00:27 i keep but by playing a bit and i'm see myself came to it uh... so simon give us a little one to about minecraft was it uh... it's it's got different game modes for the heart of it is essentially lego kind of
Starting point is 01:00:44 world in which everything is made out of blocks. And you can destroy blocks, get items from destroying blocks, and place your own blocks. So you can shape the landscape, you can build mighty castles, you can create huge pits in the world you can blow it up you can create massive mine shafts and cave systems as caves in the game and caverns for you to explore there's enemies that come out at night or hide in the dark that you have to fend off it's quite it's quite epic when you start playing it and you're just plonked in this huge world and you're thinking oh god what the hell do i do and then you know soon night comes that sun moves across the sky and then night comes and if you haven't found shelter you're
Starting point is 01:01:39 attacked by these horrible zombies that come out in the night. So, I mean, it's pretty cool. It's got so much potential. And, I mean, it's going to be an amazing, amazing game. And, I mean, this is why there's been so much buzz about it and why Notch has basically become a millionaire out of selling, you know, an alpha of a game. Yeah, it's crazy. It does look very, very good.
Starting point is 01:02:08 The point is that that stuff that Simon's talking about is really limited to the single player at the moment, and I rarely play single player games unless they're exceptional. The multiplayer is there, but it's really only a sandbox at the moment. Survivor was the core of the game, you know, where you have to defend against the zombies at night, so you have to wall yourself in, kind of thing. That's, I think, the best mode.
Starting point is 01:02:32 And when the multiplayer of that comes up, I certainly think that we may forsake WoW for a few weeks to play that. Nice. Well, let me know. I might join you, if there's more than two players. Oh, yeah. You can, like like dress up as Riker and stuff, or... Yeah, that's pretty cool.
Starting point is 01:02:50 Whatever. You can just, you can like have different skins to your character, by uploading them to the Minecraft website. And people have been creating all these skins. It's very much like Doom, like the old Doom, like the Sims and stuff. You have like, you know, you save a bitmap and that skin goes over your blocky character. So there's an awful lot of customisation to what it looks like. And there's like Hitlers running around, there's Isaacs out of Dead Space. Yeah, there's like, you know... There's naked men.
Starting point is 01:03:28 Like the Old Spice Man and the Engineer from TF2 all build a tower together. Oh god, yeah! Mega Man and all sorts. Looks insane. It's amazing. Some people have built the most incredible things in this world. But anyway, let's move on. So speaking of, you said about single-player games you're gonna play
Starting point is 01:03:47 the exceptional ones have you played Dragon Age origins Simon's awesome has two words to say with Dragon Age origins don't you Simon? I do. I do, Lewis. Loading screens! How about that? That's exactly what I was thinking you were saying. Fucking hell. Wow. It's not a fucking PlayStation 1 game, for God's sake.
Starting point is 01:04:21 Look at those loading screens there. It is a very pretty game though. It's good. It's literally, look at those loading screens there. It is a very pretty game though. It is literally five minutes going from zone to zone. Oh well, maybe if you're running on a Stone Age computer. It is, my computer is from the Stone Age. It is literally Stonehenge is my computer. It's quite impressive, I didn't know Stonehenge was a computer. It only works during like certain times of the day when the sun is shining a certain direction upon it.
Starting point is 01:04:52 Oh god. Let's move on to a silly question now then. Oh yeah, because the games were deadly serious. Well, compared to this one, yes they were. Oh dear. Oh, dear. Simon, how many Jaffa Cakes can you deep throat? Deep throat? Why would one want to deep throat a Jaffa Cake?
Starting point is 01:05:16 That implies that you're not going to actually consume it, and you'll then move it from your mouth, and you'll just have a moist Jaffa Cake just sat there with your saliva slowly dissolving it still someone wanted to know how many jaffa cakes you can deep throw i wouldn't want to do that i would just want to eat them so do you buy any chats when you eat them go full moon half moon total eclipse like the advert used. No, I just sort of like moan contentedly. Like, mmmm. And sometimes I pat my belly.
Starting point is 01:05:51 Simon kind of like treats them a bit like fuel though, more than anything. He's kind of just like filling him with unleaded, so... You know, it's kind of routine after you've done it a few times. Let's see... That's more of a statement than a question, but apparently the Yognauts want more Yohi. Give us more Yohi. I want more Yohi.
Starting point is 01:06:13 I can never have too much Yohi. Yohi's very difficult to get hold of, though. He's an elusive... He's a busy man. He's very elusive and busy and businessman. Also, recently he's come on vent and he just sounds like arse. I mean, he's got this...
Starting point is 01:06:27 He holds his mobile phone like right up to the mic. Beep, beep, beep, beep. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. It's like that every time he talks. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:38 Oh. On top of his terrible, usual low-quality mic. So, yeah, I don't know. We'll have to send him a microphone or something but he's he's hard to get hold of anyway but you have to keep doing what we have to get in contact with possible possible can't process anything possible okay so how did you meet total biscuit he's a goon We know him through the SA forums,
Starting point is 01:07:05 which is where Yogs originally comes from, the old goon squad. So, I mean, he's a fellow member of our online community, through which we both individually joined Yogs. He and Simon originally joined
Starting point is 01:07:23 the guild, because that's kind of the way it works. Do you want to explain this more coherently, Simon? You weren't doing a bad job. We're all members of these forums on somethingawful.com and yeah, they have like a guild that was on the European server that if you're a member of the forums
Starting point is 01:07:43 you can play with them and they have this for all sorts of games. They have like steam groups and stuff and so me and Lewis joined the goon squad That was on the EU server, so it's called ye olde goon squad to give it like an RP name RP to give it like an RP name. Because it was on an RP... RP server has to have an RP name. So just adding an E on the end to all the words and having E instead of the made it RP. Yeah, that's the one.
Starting point is 01:08:17 So yeah, Tollbiscuits also remember the forums. There's loads of people who remember... There's like a guy who was involved with APB He's a member of the forums. He got absolutely roasted by people You know calling him a liar and a dick because he was basically saying that you know, everything's fine You know the service will never go down you know, it's my guarantee and he already knew at that point that it was on the decline.
Starting point is 01:08:47 And, um, lead designer of Fallout New Vegas, Zagoon... He didn't send us a visa. I asked him. Really? Oh. Oh, well. He liked our Fallout 3 review video that we did a long, long time ago. It's a terrible video because we were like sleep deprived He was just mad All out three as a standard for like what we like we like post-apocalyptic zombie shoot'ems You know with a bit of leveling involved. I know a lot of people don't really like that kind of genre
Starting point is 01:09:20 But we love it. It's kind of our benchmark for how good a game is so we refer to it time sorry new vegas new vegas is basically like probably the second best game that i've played below warcraft at the moment i mean my god well you say that but you spent about you got actually you turned into a zombie when parts of the zombies came out because we didn't see you in about four days. You wouldn't answer the phone. It's a casual flash game and I was just playing it constantly. You were.
Starting point is 01:09:53 It is addictive. You do just start playing it and then think, wait a minute, why is it Thursday? I thought it was Monday. What's going on? In Torchlight, you were nearly as bad. Look at that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:04 Disappeared for about a week. Torchlight 2 coming out. Oh as bad. Yeah. Disappeared for about a week. Torchlight 2 coming out. Oh my god. Can't believe Torchlight 2 is probably going to be out before Diablo 3 is. I know, that's fucking nuts isn't it. Runic have pushed out two games. Also. Yeah but, the details they're doing in...
Starting point is 01:10:20 You know, like the whole deal with Diablo 3. We played Diablo 2 recently, didn't we, Simon? And it is dated. It is old. It is old, but it's still good. The resolution of the game... You're playing it on, like, 640x360. My iPhone has a higher fucking resolution
Starting point is 01:10:40 than Diablo 2. It's fucking mental. I'm just like, what the fuck? I'm running this in the window, the size of my fucking iPhone. It's like, what am I playing here? When I blew it up, when I finally managed to blow it up to full screen and get a window version working, which in fact was a
Starting point is 01:10:56 goon made extremely heavily modded thing, which actually increased the resolution to like still terrible. The gameplay was disgustingly addictive but it was it was dated and frankly i'm surprised that it that that blizzard are still pushing diablo 3 as hard as they are and they're making it their primary announcement at blizzcon who people who is still a massive massive diablo fan to the point that they're going to Blizzcon. Who is still a massive, massive Diablo fan to the point that they're going to Blizzcon to see Diablo
Starting point is 01:11:28 exclusively? I don't think anyone is. Just get on with it, Blizz, for God's sake. Sort it out. I'm going to get Diablo 3 when it comes out, and I probably am going to play it for a couple of weeks solid and complete the game, just because it'll be awesome. Torchlight should have had multiplayer, but
Starting point is 01:11:43 they're going to fix that with Torchlight 2 and if they're not care, you know, I don't think, I don't know whether Diablo 3 is really going to be a
Starting point is 01:11:51 Torchlight 2 killer, you know? I mean, I don't think many MLIs can beat WoW, but more people will buy Diablo 3 than Torchlight 2.
Starting point is 01:12:00 Because you'll get a free pet in WoW if you buy Diablo 3. Yeah, probably. Fuck, yeah. Just to get more people, people that are that sad that they want pets to buy the game purely for the pet, you know. I think Launer bought the Left 4 Dead 2 special
Starting point is 01:12:16 edition version so he could get like a hat, a Bill hat, in Team Fortress 2. That kind of thing. Oh god, Bill! Why? Oh god, Bill! Why? Oh god, why? Why did he have to die? Oh god. Why did you have to remind me? Sorry.
Starting point is 01:12:36 Oh, Bill. A lot of questions seem to be directed more towards Simon that are related to Jaffa cakes. How many Jaffa-related questions are there? As many as you want. It'd be easy to say how many aren't there. Let's see.
Starting point is 01:12:54 If Simon could build a vehicle made entirely out of Jaffa Cakes, what would it be and how would it work? The Jaffa-mobile. It would be powered by the smashing orangey work? The Jaffa-mobile. It would be powered by the smashing orangey bit in the Jaffa. That would be like the fuel. Molten Jaffa.
Starting point is 01:13:13 It would pump through the engine of sponge. And the tyres and the trimmings would all be the chocolatey topping. Oh god, I could eat a car now. I would say I'd eat a horse, but that's a touchy subject. Well, I mean, unfortunately they didn't let me keep the horse to sort of last me for some food.
Starting point is 01:13:39 They had to take it away and so I've probably made it into dog food somewhere. Dog food and glue yeah that's one what year is this do they still make glue exclusively yeah of course the horse glue definitely delicious horse glue let's see... Why doesn't Simon have a wife? He's so freaking smashing, I just can't understand why he doesn't have one. I'm a free spirit man. They call me the lone wolf. I travel alone. I haven't got a pack. I haven't got a...
Starting point is 01:14:24 A bitch with me. Because that's a female dog. Um... Oops. Was that Simon's theme music that just played there? I think it was a bit... it reminded me a bit of, like, Luke Skywalker, when he's, you know, leaving the ranch after his parents, well, aunt and uncle have died, and he's like staring up at the twin setting sons of Tatooine,
Starting point is 01:14:50 and suddenly the music comes up. I thought we were going for that sort of effect. Yeah, adding into it, that was my landline ringing, which, well, my dad's recently had an operation, so I think that's him ringing to sort of give us an update but i forgot to remove said did he get your dad at the same time yeah i was going to ask is your phone actually an accordion that was the landline not my mobile don't worry my i wish my mobile on silent i just harmon to me. I actually used to play the harmonica.
Starting point is 01:15:25 Oh, for God's sake. Were you in prison in 1950s America or something? Harmonica! Yeah, man. Such a good instrument. I had like a proper one. A proper one, yeah. Not one of these cheap plastic harmonicas.
Starting point is 01:15:43 Were you getting a Christmas cracker? No, I had like a... Yeah. Are you getting a Christmas cracker? No, I had like a full hat on and everything. It's good. Yeah. Did you have a case for it? Did you have to polish it? Did you have like special polish, harmonica polish?
Starting point is 01:15:54 Yeah, it was made from like turtle wax. Yeah. Snap. So, how long have you two known each other? God, it's felt years. It's felt years. It has been years. That's why it's felt years. It's not that long is it? I suppose it's like nearly coming up to like three years or so now. When's our anniversary? Are you buying me anything nice? Are we going to go for sushi or something? We can do, yeah. Take you out. You could go to Venice. Get one of those canoe
Starting point is 01:16:34 boats. It'd have to be Paris, I think. City of love. We could take the Eurostar out there. I think the Yognorps might be able to pay for that. We could visit the Louurostar out there. I think the Yognorps might be able to take that. We could visit the Louvre. Louvre. Louvre. That's how it is. Yeah. We can like, we can like stand in front of the Mona Lisa, which is a tiny little painting
Starting point is 01:16:59 with like this huge box around it with like 4,000 people in front of us looking at it and we can feel a little bit underwhelmed and and then we can like Think what did I pay like 30 euros? Get in here and then we'll go and have an expensive coffee somewhere and uh... that's what i love that we can play from their parents but in the
Starting point is 01:17:30 their parents there look at look at him that to delay late him poor in the lab
Starting point is 01:17:41 on a summer and so i was made to look at all times right no he's right Lapims. It's got an S on the end. Doesn't mean it's a plural. Simon's right. No, he is right. Lapims. Apparently you've been getting some threats on Facebook, you know, for the pilot episode of Yogg Pride. Apparently someone's threatened that if you don't post it, the Queen dies and they'll blow up a Jaffa Cake factory. Have they got the Queen? Yeah, I thought the queen was with you, Simon. Didn't you have her staying with you recently? Is she still there? Could you put her up?
Starting point is 01:18:12 Are you trying to get me to do an impersonation of the queen, Lewis, in a really unsubtle manner? Actually, I think she's here right now. I'll just get her. Hello. Hello. Oh, hello, your royal highness. Thank you for popping in. Hello, Lewis. Hello, how are you? How is one?
Starting point is 01:18:34 Hello. Very well. We're very well. Hello. Royal highness. So we haven't really had a chat for a while, but I'm just wondering how things are at Buckingham P and everything. It's Philip.
Starting point is 01:18:47 It's fine. Would you like an ABE? Hello? What? An OBE? Oh, yes, please. Would you like an ABE? Yeah. Hello? I'll have one. I think Simon would like one as well. Have you asked him? No. Well, he'd probably prefer a knighthood, do you have any of those?
Starting point is 01:19:07 I think I've got one in the drawer somewhere! Okay! Good, well if you could dust that off that would be great. Uh, Christmas? Okay! Christmas, uh, list, honest list? Yeah? Okay!
Starting point is 01:19:22 Take care! Okay, you're madge. Thank you very much. Goodbye! Goodbye. Oh, there. She's not sounding very well. She's got a bit of a twang in her voice. She has. She sounds a little bit like a female dwarf. I don't know why that is. It's strange.
Starting point is 01:19:42 Maybe she's just got a bit cold. You know, it's like that in England at the moment. She shakes hands with a lot of people so you get a cold. True. There seems to be a lot of interest in Simon though. For example there's a question by Twipo. Okay, don't know who Twipo is but Twipo. This question is for Simon. My mother is an ex-model who is looking for a strong young man like yourself.
Starting point is 01:20:08 Would you consider on dating my mother? She can be quite annoying, however most women are like that to be honest. But she does love Jaffa Cakes. It's a plus. If she loves Jaffa Cakes, does that mean there'll be plenty of Jaffa Cakes because she'll be buying loads? Or does it mean there'll be no Jaffa Cakes because she'll be buying loads or does it mean there'll be no Jaffa cakes because you'll be eating them all? Good question. That was a very good question, actually.
Starting point is 01:20:30 Tweepo, if you're listening, you should make a post. Simon, well, no, I mean... It's a deal-breaker, Lewis. It's a deal-breaker. Oh, is it? Okay. Okay, we'll find out some more information about that. Okay, yeah. Yes, indeed. I'll try and find a some more information about that. Okay, yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:46 Yes indeed. I'll try and find a Lewis question in here somewhere. I'm sure there's a couple. How did Lewis and Hannah meet? Next question. Oh god. Go on. How'd you meet?
Starting point is 01:21:00 No, no, no. Definitely the next question. He's working as a waitress in a cocktail bar. So why is that a sensitive subject then? It's not a sensitive subject, I just don't think we'll answer it this time. Hannah's cringing on IRC apparently. I just don't think we'll answer it this time. Hannah's cringing on IRC, apparently. Oh, dear.
Starting point is 01:21:31 See, the fact that you've said that will make fans so much more interested in how you met. Oh, yeah, a bit of mystery. That's what it is. Okay, yeah. Go on. A Twilight book signing, maybe. You met at a Twilight book signing. Is that actually real?
Starting point is 01:21:50 No. I was making it up. I would assume so. We're on his way out of this. He's trying to... If he was a hunter, he would be feigning death right now. If he was a rogue, he'd have vanished. This is true. I'll come back to it later then maybe.
Starting point is 01:22:09 Hmm. Let's see. Will you do some IRL video Yogpod anytime? Ooh! That's a good idea. We're trying to get Hannah to do some videos of her face. That was one with the Vegas thing. Yeah, well, I mean, I'm not horrible to look at. Well. Thing is, that's the problem, isn't it? When I first saw Chris Moyles, what he looked like,
Starting point is 01:22:43 it kind of shattered my illusion of what I expected him to look like because he is an ugly bastard and I know he looks like Sean Connery yeah I thought he would like a really strapping attractive man but he's just a bit ugly and annoying yeah I kind of don't want the same thing to happen when people see like people saw me and well they've seen pictures of us on Facebook anyway it's not like we're that secretive god it's not like we're like shying away from the popular press or anything um but i don't know something something like that possibly i i did have a plan last summer to win the sword of um arthas and bury it in a nearby field and then have an old man find it and film
Starting point is 01:23:26 that as a sort of special yogs cast but it never really took off because I didn't know because it's fucking nuts that's the stupidest most ridiculous idea he wanted to win a competition that like a million people entered and then he would have taken the prize buried it and filmed an old man digging it up. I think TotalBiscuit might have actually won that competition. So maybe he's got the sword. That would be ridiculous. Maybe we can get the sword.
Starting point is 01:23:51 He doesn't have fucking Frostmourne. He's not. He's not Frostmourne. No. No. I'm sure he would have told us if he had Frostmourne. That is true. Like every single time.
Starting point is 01:24:02 Hello, I have a Frostmourne. How are you? You're listening to blue skies i know i'm total biscuit yeah oh god how he speaks jesus um i'm sorry tv i'm sorry that's okay wait is lewis actually tv no she said i'm sorry tv it's okay simon Wait, is Lewis actually TB? No, no, no. Because he said, I'm sorry TB, it's okay Simon. What? I forgive you on behalf of TB, it's okay.
Starting point is 01:24:32 Thank you. You're like his spokesman. So if anyone does have one of those swords, I'd like it. You want someone to give you a Frostmourne? Only if they've got it. Just on the off chance. They want to shift it. They might have like, fallen off the back of the lorry, I don't mind if it's a bit dented.
Starting point is 01:24:51 Oh I think I've got a spare frostmourne in the attic! I'll just go and have a look Lewis, I'll just go and have a look! You just go round door to door and knock on old ladies doors and ask if they've got any frostmournes. Then once they're up in the attic rummaging around, you can go through their purse and steal their silver. And then pawn it and use it to buy a frostmourn.
Starting point is 01:25:14 Exactly. It's that genius idea. Everyone do that. Everyone listening, if you want a frostmourn, that's how you get one. Steal from old women. No, no, no. You can't promote this stuff, Simon.
Starting point is 01:25:28 If they see you stealing, it's best not to have any witnesses. Oh, no. I think you know what to do. Oh, God, no. A quick blow to the back of the head, that's all it takes. The frozen leg of lamb is the best way. Frozen leg of lamb. And then just pop the lamb of the head, that's all it takes. The frozen leg of lamb is the best way. And then just pop the lamb in the oven when the police lady was
Starting point is 01:25:49 cooking a leg of lamb. Yeah, exactly. That's the best thing to do. Perfect crime. I like that photo on the Yoggpod that someone made where they've kind of merged together Hannah and Lewis.
Starting point is 01:26:04 Oh no. That was just linked on IRC pod that someone made where they've kind of merged together hannah and lewis oh no that was just linked on irc and that was uh what your child would look like rumple still skin is that it is that who linked it so simon yes it is search for this yeah yeah quite an old it's posted on the 13th of june it's quite an old one but it's like it's the picture of hannah oh god the one in which she looks kind of hot with the necklace on and then it's got your face i still would i think i still would oh dear the eyebrows are out of color. Yeah. Doesn't work. So apparently... Lewis, have you ever met Warwick Davis?
Starting point is 01:26:53 What? Oh! Simon lives with him. Have you not heard? Oh for fuck's sake! What is wrong with you? Can you go and get him Simon? He's next door, right? What is wrong with you? He's there. He must be there. Oh god, I can't remember how he talks. You can't remember how he talks. He's next door. Just go and get him.
Starting point is 01:27:14 Go and get him. Just pop it. Just knock on the door. The lip door. The one down the corridor. It's a half sized door. Just knock on it. It's a half sized door. It should just be like a cat door. It's not a door. It's half-sized door. It should just be like a cat flap. A slightly larger cat flap. Warwick comes in and out at night.
Starting point is 01:27:33 Sometimes he has like a dead bird in his teeth when he comes back. Leaves it as a present. Like, thanks Warwick. You're welcome, Simon. That's how he speaks. That's how he speaks. He's here. Hello, Warwick. I've missed you, friend. Hello, Lewis. You're welcome Simon. That's how he speaks! That's how he speaks! He's here! Hello! I've missed you friend.
Starting point is 01:27:47 Hello Lewis. It's wonderful to hear from you. Have you, um, what's going on? Hello Simon, hello Lewis. Okay, um, Staben, have you met Warwick? I have now. Hi Warwick. The actual Warwick
Starting point is 01:28:03 Davis is here! Yes, I'm here, hello. Hi Warwick. The actual Warwick Davis is here. Yeah, up here, hello. It's me. I'm Warwick Davis. Perhaps people would like to give us questions for Warwick, because I mean, he's very rarely available. Breathe, Simon. Corpse him, corpse him. Oh dear. You're alright Simon. I'm alright Warwick, yeah I'm alright.
Starting point is 01:28:30 I'm alright Warwick, yeah I'm alright. Come here, come here you little lump. Come here, come here you little lump. Oh Simon. Let's have a little snuggle. Rock-a-bye Warwick. Rock-a-bye Warwick. La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la nightmares of being like chased By men with spears and nets Dream because they think he's like a weird creature
Starting point is 01:29:10 They think he's an actual leprechaun and they're trying to get like a pot of gold off of him So they chase him with spears and nets What's the track again? Yeah, he wakes up screaming in the middle of the night It's what sad really. So on an unrelated subject, Lewis, how did you and Hannah meet? I'm going on her orders here. Whose orders? Hannah's. She told me, let's see, try and talk about meeting Warwick Davis then asking him again during that so I was told to do fucking Jeremy Paxman or
Starting point is 01:29:50 something it's fucking relentless we made up a nickname for my didn't me Simon yeah Jeremy fuck that was it it's a clever nickname I'm not saying that it was he couldn't remember the surname so I'm not saying that it was. He couldn't remember the surname so he was like, oh yeah, it's like that Jeremy fuck. I was like, wait, who's that? And then Lewis said, I couldn't give a flying Jeremy. Which was quite witty. Yeah, unusually so. Anyway, we're getting off the subject. How did you meet Hannah, Lewis?
Starting point is 01:30:23 Oh, there are other questions. For goodness sake. There are. How did you meet Hannah, Lewis? Oh, there are other questions. There are? How did you and Hannah meet? It's like tier content, you see. You have to defeat this tier content to unlock the next, you see. So it's like the war you have to pass. So apparently you met the actual Warwick Davis. Yeah, we did. We did. Lewis, it was a surprise Lewis took me out to
Starting point is 01:30:47 go somewhere in fucking Essex it was terrible it was all some shitty run down mall in this awful little town modern town it's basically one of those towns that sprung up because the original beautiful town was bombed by the Nazis so they had to rebuild it from
Starting point is 01:31:12 scratch and they didn't do a very good job any war of three Davis was there anyway I'm not sure why he was there it was part of his tour for signing his new book but for some reason he chose this utterly horrendous place um it kind of reminded me of um is it day of the dead the one in which they're in the shopping mall because it was like outside of the mall it was like this post apocalyptic wasteland um full of these terrible like pre-fab buildings and there's like a working men's club that was turned into a Wetherspoons and it was the shittiest Wetherspoons I've ever seen in my life.
Starting point is 01:31:54 Do you remember that place? Oh my God. I don't really want to go back there again. No. Anyway, yeah, yeah. So Warwick was there on his illustrious tour of all the uh best places of england and it was a surprise and we were on like the first floor on the balcony and lewis pointed
Starting point is 01:32:15 down he said look who it is i looked over the balcony and my eyes lit up when i saw the tiny little figure of warwick yeah i mean it's a classic story of the podcast, really, and it was kind of something that... It just sort of happened and it fell into place and it was just very smooth. Because it was a surprise. It genuinely was a surprise. You weren't expecting him to be there.
Starting point is 01:32:36 No. And the look on your face was just astonishing. I was like a kid that had opened a Christmas present and it was exactly what I wanted. And I wanted a dwarf. It was like a kid that opened a Christmas present and it was exactly what I wanted and I wanted a dwarf I didn't get to keep him though I didn't and also it's really odd because I had to kneel down to take a picture well to have my picture taken with him so we were at the same height. And I was having a bit of trouble getting up, because I was kneeling funny. And for a moment, it looked like he was going to help me up.
Starting point is 01:33:14 He was going to give me a hand and lift me up. He was concerned, wasn't he? He was. He looked very worried. He was like that. I was like, I'm fine, Warwick, I'm fine. Oh god, Mini! So yeah, that's the story of meeting Warwick. It was covered in much more comic detail. Was something to do with Hannah involved with Warwick Davis as well
Starting point is 01:33:46 then meeting her or because she seemed to link the two together of how you two met and the
Starting point is 01:33:50 meeting with Warwick Davis Steven god damn it Steven do I have to like talk about you live with
Starting point is 01:34:02 your mother and stuff I have a broken neck I'm being looked after yeah it's not unreasonable man has a broken neck I think it says by any circumstances in which you're allowed to live with your mother having a broken neck probably about up there it's in the top five so not having any legs is probably up there as well. Yeah. Or arms, you know. As an update, by the way,
Starting point is 01:34:28 Mr. Tweepo had a reply for you, Simon. Apparently, his mother would provide a lot of Jaffas and not hog them all for herself. Oh, that's lovely. I think I need a little bit more of information about the Jaffa Cakes situation before I... You know, sign up to anything. Get on it, Tweepo. Get lots of information about the Jaffa Cakes and everything and then, uh...
Starting point is 01:34:57 You never know. I think you're avoiding this subject, Simon. I'm... I think we should press you on. So how did you meet Hannah? Why are you skirting around? She's provided ample information about Jaffa Cakes. What's wrong, Simon?
Starting point is 01:35:14 Are you not interested? No? No? Do you know what this is called? This is called projecting. What's it called? It's called projecting. I can't speak. Fuck you. Projecting. I need to have a drink. I've gone a bit. I've gone a bit horse. Sorry Steven. I don't want to bring that up again My careful. I might hit you in my car. Oh god. Yeah
Starting point is 01:35:38 Give some like flashback every time you see that faithful Oh god! To that fateful night, where a horse fell out of the sky. Woooo! Fuck this! Woooo! It just launches itself in front of you. What kind of a horse is that? Is that like a poach? It's a talking horse.
Starting point is 01:35:59 I mean, have you ever heard a talking horse? Apart from Mr. Ed. Mr. Ed, no. Oh my fucking god, that is an old one. That only Americans will get as well, I believe. How many Talking Horses are there? It's not like there's a lot of modern fucking references I can make about Talking Horses. I don't know, maybe there's one in fucking Twilight or something. There's probably a Talking Horse vampire.
Starting point is 01:36:22 It glitters as well. Probably does. Probably does. I wouldn't fucking doubt it. Oh my god. So how did you meet Hannah? Um... Can we not... have we not got more questions? Can we keep going round and round? I'm gonna cheat about this.
Starting point is 01:36:42 Just because I'm the only person with girlfriend in this chatroom doesn't mean that, like... Although, to be fair, if you did answer the question it would make it a lot easier. But anyway... Will you do more D&D episodes? Oooh, goodness. I asked Sip yesterday if he wanted to do another D&D episode, and he said... Actually, no, I asked him today, and he said,
Starting point is 01:37:09 yes, and am I doing the fishing tournament? And I said, yes, I'm doing the fishing tournament, and then I forgot about the fishing tournament. So, yeah, possibly. I like D&D. I used to play it when I was at uni. I was doing games programming, so we kind of played D&D to get ideas, and then actually made the ideas, the stories that we made up in D&D, like into a game storyline for when we were programming.
Starting point is 01:37:34 It's pretty cool. It's pretty cool. Well, it's cool in a nerdy cool way. Oh yes, it's nerdy cool. The first D&D we did was a bit difficult because Simon was GMing and it meant that he was paying so much attention to numbers and dice rolls and all that shit that he didn't really actually get to play. And that kind of made it all a bit slow.
Starting point is 01:37:57 But when I sort of ran it, it was kind of a bit smoother because Simon could just fuck about. And I thought the D&D podcast was one of our funniest. I think we all shined in the latest ones with, I mean, Sips making his campfires is a particular highlight for me. I love Sips. When I first created
Starting point is 01:38:14 the Yogscast, I sound like a fucking god or something. When I first envisioned the Yogscast, I really wanted to have Sips in it. He kind of went away for about a year, didn't he? And then he's back. So I'd like to get Sips involved. We did call him was that the second one we did Sipscast Yeah, that was a train wreck. That was such a train wreck But the point is that he is a funny guy and I want to have him in Morgan
Starting point is 01:38:40 in Probably more so than Yowie because Y we just the conversation here we go absolutely nowhere I'm and then breaks everything so yeah the great service young people are doing call our references to you at the moment Lewis on I see about some like what does the scout to say about his dodge level you you're avoiding Like, what does the scouter say about his dodge level? Because you're avoiding question.
Starting point is 01:39:09 I used my trinket. You're evasioning. Well, let's see. Simon, do you use your beard to attract a lot of women, or do you simply use it to keep your chin warm? I think it's sort of a contraceptive. It keeps them at bay, if anything. Yeah. I dunno, certain women like it, don't they?
Starting point is 01:39:34 Yeah, other bearded women. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. See, my beard grows very strangely, yeah see my big grows very strangely cuz I get it like come past my chin like under my chin I get a proper full Amish beard but never actually grows just in beneath
Starting point is 01:39:55 dope beneath a bomb let so I'm not like it is the arm connect the is that we'll say yeah so I mean as I saw like now I don't get anything below I left it so annoying. And it's ginger. Oh a ginger neck beard. Yeah, proper Amish. Oh my god, that's amazing. You said you were in the best guild in the world, Steven. No, technically we're third because according to Lich King, Paragon for the Horde. Oh he's Paragon, the Finnish guild. no it's actually with third because this according to let's get yeah parent her gonna do the finish finished
Starting point is 01:40:27 yeah I'm in the best English speaking on us muscle I think they speak English well yeah they they do their raids in in finish yeah or they are a German yeah was finished sound like I just kinda play picture but the noise a dolphin makes like skipper it's just like clicks skipper skipper yes what's that skip we need to dodge the frost tombs? I can promise. Oh dear.
Starting point is 01:41:12 Fun times. Let's see, another question. How... that's a shit one. What class did you first play, and what, if any class, do you wish to re-roll in the upcoming expansion? Starting with Simon. Oh goodness. I need to cough hang on this just turned my cough okay Lewis then he's not very well he's like Terry Wogan after he sort of done about half an hour
Starting point is 01:41:40 of the show he just starts getting really chesty we've been doing this for two hours don't we it's been two hours of this that's true well an hour and 40 we start broadcasting I suppose well those first 20 minutes are they were amazing and everyone missed out on them they did I was glorious we went through all the best content then you see when no one could listen because it's just much easier. Simon's playing a hunter, I'm probably playing a paladin. I probably won't be healing due to the terrible
Starting point is 01:42:12 backlash I've had from my videos where people watch me heal. But we'll see. I mean, I'm probably going to be levelling a couple of characters just because the old world's changed. Everyone wants to level. And I recommend it because it's a lot of fun, actually. Yeah, definitely.
Starting point is 01:42:30 I'm actually going to level without Recruit a Friend for the first time since they introduced Recruit a Friend, just because they're leveling so awesome. I did a goblin on the alpha for level 60. Good grief. I mean, um... It's kind of... Bloody hell. Don't spam my Facebook page with questions of how I met Hannah.
Starting point is 01:42:52 Just saying. Oh god, I gotta look at this. Bringing it on myself. Oh my goodness. But, um... I recommend everyone level up alts and see what you want to play. Because Blizzard like putting variety in with the classes rather than I recommend everyone level up alts and see what you want to play because Blizzard like putting variety in with the classes rather than making more homogenization. Every class
Starting point is 01:43:10 feels a bit different and often you don't know until high level whether that's really your playstyle so you need to find something that you like playing. I think a lot of people level a class, stick with that class and never play another one but I've tried to play different character every expansion so I was originally a priest vanilla wolf priest then I was a known warrior then I was a hunter back in TBC for some well and then finally I've seen a death not this expansion so I've been definitely mixing up awesome yeah I did the same I mean I was a hunter in vanilla then a prot warrior in TBC and then resto Jordan wrath and I'm hopefully staying as a
Starting point is 01:43:56 rest of Joe's but then depends what I needed to be I originally rolled a druid but it was so incredibly boring that I stopped at level 15 or something. Rolled a paladin and played that through vanilla healing and TBC healing a bit of off-tanking. Wrath wanted to tank. That didn't go amazingly well. And re-rolled hunter. Having a lot of fun with that exotic pets for the win also pets pests exotic pests um and i'm gonna level a priest I don't know quite what I'm going to do with it though in Kata. Yeah, looking forward to doing instance runs and exploring the new areas in Kata. We had a lot of fun doing the instances, didn't we?
Starting point is 01:45:03 There's nubs, like level 30s or 20s or whatever. We're currently playing through some of the low-level instances just to see what's changed and frankly I'm shocked that I don't remember the winters I mean we've said this in the videos but just by adding maps and the quests start the classic dungeons it's made such an enormous change to how they play and how they feel you know you don't get lost in Nome region you just play it through with a lovely little quest line which has five blues and you come out of the dungeon with a level and several blue items. It's just such a nice thing to do. It's cool to just queue for an instance, get instantly teleported to it.
Starting point is 01:45:43 You bring up the map, it tells you where to go and then you can actually concentrate on playing and not... I mean, God, in vanilla you'd have to actually get to these fucking places like Maraudon and fucking Desolace. Just getting there and then finding the right
Starting point is 01:46:00 instance portal took four fucking ever. It was just unbelievable. Imagine Sunken Temple. Imagine going on a Sunken Temple run without summoning stones. Without the stones at the instance. Ugh.
Starting point is 01:46:15 You'd have to get there. You'd have to find the place. Half the people wouldn't even have it on their map. And then you'd have to go all the way down through a shitload of trash just to get to the way down through a shitload of trash just to get to the dungeon portal. Oh, God, yeah, yeah. This is true.
Starting point is 01:46:30 And then the actual dungeon itself sunk in temple. Fuck. People would have to do it for, like, their class quests, though, to collect, like, feathers and shit to get to it. The point is that the thing is that we have kind of got used to this, which kind of means that when we go and play another MMO that's based on WoW, because all MMOs, all modern MMOs that have to be popular these days have to be based on WoW,
Starting point is 01:46:50 it's kind of, sometimes it's a very old-school WoW thought, and you do have to walk to the instance portals, and you do have to do all this stuff, and we're like, fuck that, you know? We want our maps in instances, we want our convenience, and it's just the little things that you miss when you play other MMOs. We must polish the simplicity. Stuff so that you can just concentrate on having fun and exploring a new world, a new place, rather than actually worrying about, you know... Are you typing? What are are you doing it's not me
Starting point is 01:47:30 people are asking about brian blessed you're like you remind me of jessica fletcher in the intro sequence to murder she wrote you're like tapping away in your old little time i'm trying i'm trying to be quiet i didn't think you could hear that green amarylle he's talking to me god damn it amariel blame him how dare you apparently um people are saying that you also live with blind bruh brian blessed son i don't live with him i mean he visits a lot sure but I don't live with him good grief is he there at the moment I'm not going to live with a married man that would be weird
Starting point is 01:48:10 does he perhaps need anything to eat he does like his jam sandwiches I never have any jam this is why I'm a bit worried about that guy's mother about you know ending up with her in the jaffa cake situation because i know that if you live with someone like brian blessed who eats loads of jam you're never going to have any jam in the house i went to asda the other day
Starting point is 01:48:38 i bought 48 jars of jam came back put them all in the cupboard put a lock on the cupboard took the cupboard off of the wall put it in a safe put the safe into a slightly larger safe mm-hmm I I entered a random string safe out in the woods and I then coated the woods in tar and concrete. I then dug up all of the woods. I put them on a spaceship and I drove it to the moon. I then blew a big hole in the moon, put the wood in the middle of the moon, covered it back up,
Starting point is 01:49:30 and then I knocked the moon out of orbit so it would go into deep, deep space. The moon then entered another galaxy where there were these alien species that coated it in this, like, diamond sort of crystal globe. So it's like a snow globe, but with the moon inside. And it was amazing. It looked so magical.
Starting point is 01:49:58 And I thought, oh, my jam will be safe. And I then went down the next morning to have jam on toast. And course I couldn't because it was like buried on the fucking moon. Galaxy. But at least it was safe from Brian Bless. Do you have any form of like, small amount of jam that you might be able to entice Brian Blessed over with? Because I think some people want him to say hello. Um... Oh, fuck me.
Starting point is 01:50:38 It's a request, Joe. This isn't a sketch, Joe. Oh my god. Hello! Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. request system is sketch shows the
Starting point is 01:50:47 the the the the the the the I mean, this is a galaxy. Brian, if you finish doing that sat-nav, you promise you'd, uh, be bored. TURN LEFT IN SEVEN YARD!
Starting point is 01:51:10 Hey, Brian, how do you like your eggs? SCRAMBLE! Hooray! Yeah, yeah, that'll keep people happy. Okay. Well, there we are. That's good. I reckon it's time for another weird and wonderful question. Oh, God, really? So how did you and Hannah meet?
Starting point is 01:51:32 Hannah's already told us on IRC. Oh, really? Has she? Oh, I missed that. But she just wants you to say it on air, you see. Oh, dear. She's a yognaut, all right? She's a goddamn yognaut!
Starting point is 01:51:47 There you go, I said it. She's a fan of the show. She sent an email to Lewis, and enclosed in it was a picture of her topless. And he said, oh I'll have a piece of that. And they met up in a sleepy motelel where they booked a room for an hour and they left after 12 minutes. Simon, that's all true, except for the motel. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 01:52:15 So, that's it. Yeah. Fair enough. Well, now people know, you see. And now it'll stop all the incessant asking from everyone on Facebook and everything, you see. So, it's probably a good thing that you said Hooray, so this weird question right? Okay?
Starting point is 01:52:31 If you are paddling upstream on a chocolate river in a kayak and one of the wheels fall off How many pancakes can you fit inside a doghouse? I thought this was going to be like a proper physics question. Random lol, monkey cheese, lol. I mean, kayaks don't have wheels, do they? That immediately stood out as this question just being like random nonsense.
Starting point is 01:53:00 Yeah. And then as it continued, I just my brain basically started to dribble out of my ears um you know when you have a really heavy cold it was like that basically pink um but pink yeah which is your favorite color let's see i've got just just got pm'd by someone that doesn't believe your story and reckons you should post a picture to prove it. Ooh. Which I think is a very crafty way to ask for a picture.
Starting point is 01:53:30 Is it okay if I post it but replace her face with my face? Is that okay? Let's see. Do you guys plan on making the thing is your motto sometime? Because I think I've listened too long because I now... What? Because I think I've listened too long because I now even say it. The problem is...
Starting point is 01:53:58 What? The problem is, that's not much better. You've just replaced one of the words. Well, the thing is, the thing is, we don't even say it that much. Well, someone made a remix, didn't they? And I think that we're not going to suddenly stop just talking the way we are, because someone doesn't like it. Everyone has things they say. We probably say like too much.
Starting point is 01:54:29 I like being... I do like saying like. Apparently I say fair enough quite a lot. Oh dear. I think these things are going in circles though. You say certain things sometimes and then you get over them,
Starting point is 01:54:45 and then you say other things, but... True. It's kind of worrying that, like... That, like... There we go. It's kind of worrying that people who listen to us end up speaking a bit like us, and they take on our mannerisms, and that's terrifying to me.
Starting point is 01:55:06 That's quite cool. I'd like that. That isn't something which is... I mean, that's a psychological thing, though. I mean, that's... One of the things that's very, very infectious is laughter. People tend to pick up on other people's laughter. And if they like that person, they laugh in a very similar way. Like, I laugh exactly like my dad does.
Starting point is 01:55:23 And it's unconscious. And I only realized it when I met my dad recently and we had we gone really well he's not a big laugh at my dad but he has quite a unique laugh and I was surprised but I've also noticed it because other people do similar things they they laugh in the same ways people they admire like if you admire tom cruise for example how would you laugh simon oh god why did you put me on the spotlight is it because i kept asking about how you met hannah is that why is this revenge this is very petty very petulant you do a fantastic tom cruise laugh impression i just want to hear it for my i It's just loud. I just have to be loud. That's what all of these impressions are. It's just me being loud. That's the key. Oh, God. It's just mad laughter, isn't it? Yeah. That's how Tom Cruise laughs. That's almost spot on, actually. God.
Starting point is 01:56:28 You can't breathe as you do that at the same time. Apparently, the Minecraft Halloween update just went live. Oh, shit. Well, see you later, Steven. Restart Steam. Restart Steam. Oh, wait, it's not on.
Starting point is 01:56:43 Apparently, it's been up for two hours. Oh, goodness. No, I think that means... always known power parties that the two hours hope goodness though i think that that means i think you talk about i'll show actually it could be well has been too well not just said yeah he is that they're telling fine
Starting point is 01:57:04 how we're gonna play minecraft Fallout New Vegas and like do the two dailies on where it takes me to make- Get triple screens! Oh god. Yeah. I don't think my computer could handle that. Also having to buy another two monitors probably isn't the best thing in the world i don't have room for three monitors this one's awesome screen that i've got now
Starting point is 01:57:33 and that's just it takes up pretty much all of the desk yeah i'm running 3 24 inches it's it's just awesome it's amazing 324 inches monitors yeah what the do you ever play like any flight sim games on that i can't play world of warcraft in 5760 by 1200 resolution what was the point in that could you see behind you with that well basically it it fish bolts on the outer screens a little bit, but you can see two screens extra worth of distance to the side, so looking at the void zones and stuff, you can see everything. It's amazing. I've seen everything. I've seen it all. This is what I'm talking about, Steven. That. I mean, who normally plays WoW and has that?
Starting point is 01:58:21 Oh, I don't normally play on multiple screens, I I only play on one and have one screen for IRC and one screen for random websites where I read stuff during raids and stuff. Do you know what, Lewis? I think that's what's holding us back. Well, the fact that you backpedal using F. This is what's holding us back from being pro-raiders
Starting point is 01:58:40 like Insidia. Kungaloosh Anonymous could be like Kingslayers on Heroic and everything if only we had like three widescreen monitors each. Yeah, that's the secret
Starting point is 01:58:51 you see. Mine are awesome though because they can rotate from landscape and portrait so I can make it 3600 by 1920 so it's like the equivalent of a 49 inch TV
Starting point is 01:59:00 and just lie in bed and watch films. Let's see. Have you punched Bruce Willis in the face yet? Oh my god see. Have you punched Bruce Willis in the face yet? Oh my God. I'm going to punch Bruce Willis in the face! I haven't.
Starting point is 01:59:11 No. Okay, next. I think I should burn through all these. Can we expect to see more teamwork with Yodcast and TotalBiscuit? Probably. Probably. It's up to him entirely. Anything that he suggests, we're likely to go, okay.
Starting point is 01:59:36 It's fun doing stuff with him. Well, TV said he'd be listening, so... It is a lot of fun doing stuff with TV. So, yeah. I mean, if we can do some more collabs, that'd be cool. He is an awful lot like lewis he's he's got this this sort of like this professional sort of outer coating and then you crack it and inside there's just this crazy bastard just run to everything it's amazing answer everything. It's amazing. Ah, bless him.
Starting point is 02:00:08 Let's see. A lot of people have been asking about the song in the beginning of your YouTube video when you were in Scarlet Monastery with the Ashbringer. Fuck off! Next question. I don't answer questions about YouTube songs from two years ago. There has actually been quite a few people asking about that song
Starting point is 02:00:24 saying it's been really bugging them. I don't know. Find out yourself, Jesus. What does it say on there? No, I don't know. It was so long ago. How am I supposed to know that? You know what they should do? They should find out that there's like a phone number you can call and then you play music down the phone and it'll identify what you're playing. They should do that, but have the Yogscast playing.
Starting point is 02:00:43 Do that for the sake. Next. I didn't seem too happy with that one. I can't stand these questions. That is like my pet hate. What's the music on your video? I love all of these questions and I love all of our listeners.
Starting point is 02:01:01 They're all lovely people. They are. Mwah. Okay. What are your thoughts on the subject of Carl Pilkington? Oh, I love him. I referred to him earlier in this podcast. Carl, he's good, isn't he? I've been watching the Idiot Abroad thing on Sky. Love it.
Starting point is 02:01:24 It's good stuff. He's good, isn't he? I've been watching the Idiot Abroad thing on Sky. Love it. It's good stuff. I've always sort of felt you can't do a podcast without sort of knowing about the Ricky Gervais podcast. And that's basically just Carl Pilgrimson, isn't it? So, yeah, I like him. Simon, you're a fan as well, aren't you, probably? Yeah, yeah. I don't know.
Starting point is 02:01:47 I think lately it's just gotten a bit too farcical it just seems to be ridiculous it's like how much of an idiot can he act and he's i don't know he's sort of become this stereotypical idiot the sort of everyman character. I mean it's good to use him in TV shows like that. You have this everyman idiot bloke plonked in this situation he's uncomfortable with and you just watch everything unravel around him. It's like an awful lot of these um like comedy movies that you have and like sitcoms except it's like a real bloke you know it's like someone say oh god the vicar's coming around and i've got four hookers here oh goodness what am i going to do you know he's like oh he's put in ridiculous situations and he he he sort of acts naturally. And it's that natural behaviour of his that shines through and makes him quite a good comedian.
Starting point is 02:02:54 I mean, that's essentially what he is. He's a comedian. Fair enough. There's people on IRC asking if you can laugh like Ricky Gervais, Simon. No. There's something I can do. Hang on. How do I do this? Annoying. God. Street thing that he does.
Starting point is 02:03:18 Yeah. I've not heard that before. Yeah. You better not start doing that on a regular basis. Every podcast from now on. Let's see. Next weird question. There's lots of weird questions left now.
Starting point is 02:03:38 Hi, Simon and Lewis. This is like a shit weird question, right? I played World of Warcraft up to the first expansion, and like most people my age at the time, 19 to 20, I quit. Because of Cataclysm, my interest has been rekindled and now play. However, I find it odd that most people that play World of Warcraft now and most people who view your YouTube videos are much younger. Does this fact make you feel like a pedo grooming children?
Starting point is 02:04:07 Actually, it does feel weird to, like, add friends on Facebook and then, you know, like, Yognauts and fans add them. And then I add, like, someone that I actually know that I've met and they say, you know, how come you've got, like, all these, like, 16, 17-year-old boys added to your Facebook? I have to explain. Oh, no, you know, how come you've got like all these like 16, 17 year old boys added to your Facebook? I have to explain. Oh no, you see, it's fine. There's nothing dodgy about it.
Starting point is 02:04:32 There's nothing dodgy. No, no. You see, I do this thing on the internet and they like me. You see? It's fine. It's nothing weird. It's not weird. No.
Starting point is 02:04:45 No. Oh. No. Oh, God. So, yeah, it does get a little strange sometimes. I just deal with it. The fact is that not, again, like I said before, not that big of a proportion of our viewers are that age anyway. Yeah. So. that big of a proportion of our viewers are of that age anyway. What are some of the worst, awesome and most exciting jobs you two have had?
Starting point is 02:05:18 I once worked for Pfizer who make Viagra I worked for them doing drug design Did you ever get any freebies? or anything? What I've done Oh my god, really? I've obviously talked about stuff that I've done in the podcast
Starting point is 02:05:39 and stuff but I don't know it's a difficult question isn't it? What's the most exciting job? I think the most exciting job is what we do at the moment we're trying to yeah trying to get this stuff going good answer did you say drug did drug design for viagra company drug design that's what it's called how do you design it surely it only has one purpose anyway well drug design is a kind of pharmaceutical terminology, which means, you know, the optimization of a route to a particular pharmaceutical.
Starting point is 02:06:12 It's to do with my degree and it's guff, but... It's very interesting, Lewis. Can you please tell me some more about drug design? You just hit the desk with your forehead. Yeah. God. Oh. I worked at All Day's convenience store. Big shout out to the All Day's posse.
Starting point is 02:06:34 Yeah. And Lawrence and Ben and James Black, of course. Oh, yeah. Andy Davis. Andy the D-Man Davis. Yeah, of course. Barry, of course. yeah Andy Davis Andy the D-man Davis yeah of course Barry of course Barry he's one of the best bosses I ever had crazy hair crazy hair crazy man what a lovely man he was lovely I think I was related to him this is the weird thing right in these little towns like where I came from in the cotswolds you're basically related to everyone everyone's related
Starting point is 02:07:11 everyone like like the family yeah yeah it's like everyone sort of slightly in bread but it's a couple of generations ago so it's like you know you're someone's cousin second removed or you know their auntie married you know they're that brother and then that brother's daughter is that guy's you know whatever grandmother and everyone's like vaguely related it's just terrifying absolutely terrifying and there's like these big families that you get and everyone has the same surname and you think you know hang on on this estate You know, there's you know, we'll call them the Smiths I don't want to say things like the Hathaways or anything because that would be bad. So there's the Smiths
Starting point is 02:07:57 They live at number four. There's Smiths that live at eight. There's Smiths that live 14 and 16 There's also Smiths that live at 8, there's Smiths that live at 14 and 16, there's also Smiths that live at 24 and 28. It's like, what? How many fucking Smiths are there in this little town? There's only 12 people in the town. Like the Matrix. Yeah, exactly. They're all agents. Oh my god. So yeah, that's how you design a drug. So, there we go. I hope that was helpful. So yeah, that's how you design a drug.
Starting point is 02:08:23 So there we go. Hope that was helpful. So there's another stupid question, okay? This is just... There are no stupid questions, only stupid people. True. Well, this is made by a stupid person then, which is actually more random than the kayak one. Okay.
Starting point is 02:08:42 Three people walk into a bar. The first one is an old man with a long beard Think Gandalf The second is a tall dark man with scars all over his face And a Charlie Chaplin moustache And the third is a dwarf holding a tyre iron in his mouth Which one of them is eating a Jaffa cake? If you've got a tyre iron in your mouth It's hard to eat a Jaffa Cake. If you've got a Tyrone in your mouth, it's hard to eat a Jaffa Cake.
Starting point is 02:09:09 I'm thinking the Gandalf guy could be, but it could be difficult if he's got a huge beard to actually get the Jaffa Cake in. I had this trouble in the past. I haven't shaved in a few weeks. My beard is so big that it's hard to push
Starting point is 02:09:23 Jaffa Cates into my gob. My goodness, really? So I'm thinking the scarred black guy... So that he also pushes around into a kind of... Mmm. Sort of a... It's basically like an afro, but on the lower half of my head. Right.
Starting point is 02:09:36 Yeah, it's like that. So I'm thinking it's going to be the scarred black guy with the Hitler moustache. Because he's scarred, he's seen a lot, he's been through it all. He knows about the world. He needs the comfort of a Jeffer cake to soothe him gently. So I think it's him. Fair enough, that's that question. I hope that satisfied that peculiar person who answered that.
Starting point is 02:10:03 So there seems to be people asking quite a lot about did you actually test Viagra, Lewis? No, no, no. Well, test. What does that mean? Did you take any? No, no, I didn't take any when it was being tested, no. Or any other time at all.
Starting point is 02:10:25 That's what I was about to ask. There was another question which I saw recently. A lot of people have been commenting saying that I sound like Will from The Inbetweeners, which is quite strange because I actually went to school. He was in my class. I was in the same class as Joe Thomas who is actually Simon on Inbetweeners so strangely I do have
Starting point is 02:10:51 that in betweeners oh that's quite cool, that's Ollie someone's dog's barking hi Ollie, it's good to have Ollie in the show actually as well hi Ollie it's not actually Ollie, it's like when there's Brian Blessed and Warwick Davidson the Queenllie it's not actually ollie it's like when there's brian blessed and warwick
Starting point is 02:11:05 davidson the queen here it's just me we're joined here by ollie he's he has cameo appearances in the odds cast in the odds cast. Mostly when he's hungry. Somebody called Anton asked, how much gold do I have to give Lewis to make him marry Anton? Oh.
Starting point is 02:11:35 Well, I mean, I'm not really in much need of gold since I made about 90,000 gold off glyphs in the latest glyph fest. So I'm currently absolutely fucking got gold coming out of my arse. Simon probably... You should see a doctor about that.
Starting point is 02:11:52 Probably a good sign. I mean, are you eating like the gold coins that you get for Christmas and you forget to take the foil off? So what's going on here? Oh man, I used to love those gold coins. You get from lots of Spencer's yeah I love those get some Christmas maybe I'm thinking like IRL gold real gold that he will give you oh
Starting point is 02:12:21 not sure could be in real Apple he just said he said just said cold so I'm not sure. It could be in real life gold. Maybe, I don't know. He just said, he just said gold, so I'm not sure. But yes. What were you going to say Lewis, before I interrupted you about gold? I was going to say, you know like how Halloween overshadows fireworks night? We should do something for fireworks. Didn't we? It's a good night for me yes we should do something with fireworks
Starting point is 02:12:51 for fireworks because it's more of a british celebration fireworks night but it always gets like forgotten about until halloween over and then was oh fuck it's fireworks night in like three days yeah i actually broke my neck on fireworks night. It was 5th of November. Oh Jesus fucking Christ, Staven, can't you shut up about that for ten bloody minutes? Remember, remember, the 5th of November. I broke my neck. Horse coming out of the sky. Dude, was it a fucking horse? Was that what it was? It was a fireworks spooked horse. Someone had been tying fireworks to it.
Starting point is 02:13:24 Someone shot a massive rocket up the arse of the horse and it went up in the sky. I wonder why there were sparks coming out of it. It was a spent firework horse. Well there we are. We've got to the bottom of that mystery. Play safe on fireworks night if you're listening. Yeah, everyone. Don't fool around, laughing matter stuff, sparklers in the eye. Yeah. Always wear gloves. Don't touch hot metals and fireworks when you've lit them. And don't do drugs! Don't shoot things in people's faces, don't shoot fireworks off.
Starting point is 02:14:02 Don't throw fireworks through letterboxes through people you don't like, don't do that. No, no, I've never done that. Apart from that time in France when I went to the art stream. But that's a different story. Really? Explain. No, no, no. Has it been seven years since you did that? 1998 it was. no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Yeah, seven years. What's the statute of limitations on my other crime? Just so I know where I am on those.
Starting point is 02:14:47 Well, my new crime, if you short-lift the Penny Suite or Freddy the Frog or something, it's only two months. Simon, how fucking old is that reference? A Freddy the Frog? They still do them! They still do them!
Starting point is 02:15:02 They still do Freddos. Penny Suites exist either. You have to pay about 5p for a chewy... I think it's 15 for a Freddo. 20p now, I think. 20?! Oh, fuck me! It used to be 10p! I stole a packet of Polos when I was... Conservative government for you, guys. Right there. Is that... is that okay?
Starting point is 02:15:21 It's two months. If you steal something that's worth, you know, 20p, anything less than a quid, you know, after two months you're allowed to talk about it. That's the statute of limitations. They can't get you after that. If you kill someone, it's a bit longer. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It's just a tad.
Starting point is 02:15:41 Yeah. Anyway, it's getting a bit late now. It's been two and a quarter hours live, so I think that's probably a good time to wrap up. Goodness. Well, it was very enjoyable, and thank you very much for coming on the show, obviously. And on behalf of Noticed Radio as a whole, yes, definitely.
Starting point is 02:16:02 It was a pleasure having you. It was a pleasure talking to you saving we'll definitely keep in touch and stuff yeah i'd certainly want to link my our videos to your proper guides because i think that people deserve a more sense a more a decently written guide to a boss if they search for it on youtube yeah and no one can beat my awesome paint skills definitely yeah quite quite someone drew a like guide on our guilds like thorium and i think it looked like mickey mouse taking a shit good grief what a lovely note well it's been an absolute pleasure thank you for inviting us on here. That's my rise. And say thanks to the Queen, Brian Blessed, and Ollie,
Starting point is 02:16:47 and everyone else and everything as well. And the last request before you leave is, would you be able to sing us out? If they'd like a song. What kind of song are you thinking? I don't know. Something fallout-esque? Everyone wants you to sing.
Starting point is 02:17:05 Oh, beautiful. I got spurs that jingle Jingle jingle Jingle jingle I got spurs that jingle Jingle jingle Jingle jingle Jingle jingle Jingle jingle
Starting point is 02:17:19 Jingle jingle Jingle jingle Jingle Jingle Jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle. Jingle. Jingle. On behalf of obviously Noticel Radio and Yoxcast, thanks for listening.
Starting point is 02:17:35 Press the stop button. I am. Thanks for listening and I'll see you soon. Bye. World of Warcraft is your passion. We are your passion sound deck. Noticel Radio.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.