Triforce! - Triforce! #231: Huffin' on Dragon
Episode Date: August 31, 2022Triforce! Episode 231! We start a new segment: 'Did This Annoy Lewis?' and we cover some strange news from this week! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courte...sy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hello, hello, hello!
Hi!
Hey there!
Hello!
Come out from under that rock and listen to us for an hour.
Or stay under there while you listen. Stay under that rock and listen to us for an hour.
Stay cozy under there.
You know, don't let us, you know, frighten you out of your hiding place.
Don't be afraid, little one.
Put on these headphones and hear some things.
It's been an interesting little week because, Pflax, you came down.
I did.
And Sips, you stayed under the rock.
I stayed under the rock and listened to you guys for an hour, yeah.
Yeah, we had a good time with me
when period was we played bolt action we did um which will go out in probably three months time
when it finally gets some editing because it's a bit of a fiddle it's always a fiddle doing the
little tiny man yeah and then we we did a dota tournament which was exhilarating it was and it
was great very stressful there's been a new
patch right for dota isn't there like a big new balance patch yes there has it came out like
two days ago it's the pre pre-ti patch we were hoping for that's going to shake everything up
are you still playing a lot of dota lewis no but i'm watching quite a lot you see okay and i i love
it now like i love not having to play i'm old and arthritic
and i don't have the the quick twitch reflexes and also people just get angry with me um the
people who want to play with me get angry with me yeah i'm such it's like when i play with period
or something it's like he hates it he he hates it he just it changes his view of me you know yeah whereas if i like sound
smart when i'm doing the casting you know i i think period has a higher view of me
you want to stay in that zone you want to stay in the high view zone it's quite nice i mean when i'm
playing dota as well i'm concentrating i'm not like making jokes i'm not like having fun you know whereas when i'm watching someone else play bad or even not that bad like better than i would you
know even the worst games we watch the people we're watching are clearly doing things that
are better than me and i'm like why is he doing that you know i'm like oh a terrible play you
know and i'm and i'm i'm like secretly in the back of my mind i'm like i probably would have done that right um or you know because yeah you're living vicariously through them right
because you're watching them you're like oh yeah solid solid play that's the play i would do for
sure but then it's when it comes down to it you probably wouldn't have done the play i would hope
it was making me better at the game you know but i don't know if it is you know i think a lot of
people watch stuff online assuming it's going to make them better and it must do to some extent
like my game knowledge must have increased a little bit but well your game knowledge for i
would hope so because i think for casting you do have to have a tremendous amount of game knowledge
you don't necessarily need to be you know the the best at the game but if you know a lot about it
and how it works that
that's kind of essential right for casting i guess i'm not i'm not schooling myself though i'm not
researching i'm not like looking into it you know when you look at some of these pro gamers i think
i've probably talked about this before but they always they always always like treat it like
school and they learn you know the movement speeds of all the heroes and they actually make an effort
to kind of in you know um digest some information about the heroes and they actually make an effort to kind of in
you know um digest some information about the game so that when they actually are playing the
game they're like they know that faceless void runs faster than shadow shaman or whatever without
boots and so they know that they can punch people down whereas i've never lifted a finger to learn
any of that crap i barely know the item names and I've done 5,000 hours. But that's because it's like fun. You know, it's not it's but it's not fun when you're playing
it. Dota is a really weird game.
It is. You got very, you got very into the casting when we did the Gunter National, whatever
we call it, the Yogster National, the sort of 4-team thing that we did last week.
The Gunter National. to national the sort of 4.14 thing that we did last week the gunter national
you got really into it
and it was quite funny to see because
I've watched a lot of bad dota
and that's
my favourite kind
so I'm really sort of just kind of letting it wash
over me because you can't get too into it
but you were really into it
but you do get kind of caught up
in the moment and it's a very exciting
game it's an hour there's a whole storyline if you're watching the game it really does
teams that are like way ahead and then come back or teams that are blowing it you can see them
panicking in real time it's thrilling i feel a bit embarrassed because i do just lose i i don't
i also i don't i don't want to be that guy that's a casting right i don't want
to be that i'm not good at it and i'm not it's almost like if someone was list had to listen
to it like like back in the day i guess this is where this comes from in a sense like people
doing radio of the game right so you listen to the radio version of the football play play by play
yeah the play by play and so i feel
like i'm not but i also feel like it adds just a level of base excitement and sometimes period
will like pick up his vape and i'll hear like the hiss of a vape and i'm like okay i've got talk for
the next minute yeah because i've got like this window where period's most excited thing he's
gonna do is cough smoke everywhere you know if something interesting happens yeah yeah um you're working with the worst caster in doha let's just put that
i am the worst like uh you know if you ever hear me casting in a big event they've run out of people
so i i can do it but it's not like my main job but i'm not generally the the play-by-play guy
like i would be the person making stupid comments
on the side so the full-time casting we did the scrub cast on Tuesday for the regular Tuesday
night scrub cast games and we got lyrical in who's like a ti main stage caster top tier caster
um and he was just chilling like you know he's just hanging out but he just effortlessly sort of
uh steps in and cast the fight and tells the story.
He's very good at it.
And he's got a great voice as well.
Is he American?
Yeah, he is.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
They have a very different casting style to Brits, for example, or maybe even anyone else. But they ham it up a bit, don't they?
American casters?
Gabe doesn't.
I don't think Gabe does.
He's just himself.
He's one of the nicest,
genuinely one of the nicest guys I've ever met.
Some people do manage to get wrapped into it.
They get sucked in,
and they're just in a different world when they're casting.
Yeah.
Yeah, I love that.
Whereas I'm always just not quite sure what's going on.
Right.
I'm trying to learn it myself.
I'm like, what happened there?
Do you suppose there's a...
I'm not sure who's on which team.
Right.
There's kind of an allegory for most things.
Most things that we do in life,
I think we like to think that if someone's doing something,
they know what they're doing.
But more often than not,
they're just sort of brazenly having a go.
You know what I mean?
Like, they don't really 100%.
Everybody's uncertain of themselves most of the time.
People who are blindly certain of themselves seem like psychopaths.
Like, generally, I think most people are sort of uncertain, a little bit nervous.
They want to make sure it goes well.
They're worried about how they did.
They're thinking about themselves.
Yeah.
From afar, you think, oh, wow, everyone is so competent.
Yeah, this guy's got it all sewn up. You know he's doing blah blah blah and i guess like some of it's just experience probably absolute routine or whatever but then yeah there's always going to
be an element of self-doubt and yeah whatnot yeah i think some of these guys are just natural
prep they've all they've practiced or they have practiced a lot
and they yeah they strike you as so professional i mean i know that od pixel who's i would say
rightly considered the best sort of play-by-play caster in dota and you honestly should be
considering one of the best in esports um i always thought that he he gives off this impression of
just being this kind of uh sort of goofy guy who's just sort of turning up and having a go and everything.
But I know that he does practice, rewatches things,
comes up with lines ahead of time that he could drop in.
He puts a lot of work into it.
And I think the impression that some people have is
you've either got it or you ain't.
It's not like singing.
You can't just practice and sing as well as Adele.
We've spoken about this before.
Some people just have that voice and some don't so owen absolutely has the ability to speak
ridiculously fast and have that speed of thought and of uh knowing everything is incredible to
watch him cast a long team fight you know like everything just comes flying out of it but there's
a lot of practice that has gone into it and uh a lot of training that's where i would struggle
i just don't like practicing i
don't know i'm not a fan of it i don't want to prepare i don't really want to do any work
i want to turn up and just be good and if i'm not good i'm not i don't like this yeah yeah i'll go
find something else that i can immediately effort at least effortlessly be good at you know what i
mean like i'm not putting in any well the other secret is being edited right like you know this is how most comedians they have their hour-long perfected set that they've
trimmed and trimmed and trimmed and edited to be funny every every moment and all the beats lined
up and it's prepared and the other thing is you know the panel shows record for two three hours
and cut it down to half an hour of the funny bits you know and and they're the two ways that we see these funny people be funny online but of course they're
um not like that all the time you know in real life you know and i think that you just assume
oh this guy is naturally very very funny and some of them are but they're not a lot of it is just
throwing stuff out there and seeing what sticks and guessing and just just because you don't you
don't necessarily know how funny people are going to find a joke until you've you've said it you
know sometimes they're just not funny in my experience a lot of my jokes don't land wait
but do you actually prepare your jokes though like do you think about jokes ahead of time and
then you're like i wonder i wonder how this one's going to go down. No, I don't. No, me neither.
I don't do any preparation whatsoever.
I don't think I've ever prepared for anything.
But in the moment, I don't care.
I'm just going to
throw stuff out. Triforce we don't cut very much
I don't think for this.
As you can tell from this long meandering conversation
about nothing. This is very Triforce.
Yeah, it's not very edited.
We had a great time, P-Flex.
We did.
It was really nice to see you.
There were two times when I think I annoyed you, though.
I was down there for four days, so that's pretty good.
Only two times managing to annoy you.
I'm pretty good at annoying people.
Well, I'm sure I annoyed you at least that many times.
No, not at all.
So, here are the two things, Sips, all right, that I annoyed Lewis.
First of all...
I'm like a Lewis expert.
I can weigh in on this.
Of course. I'll tell you if he was annoyed by that. All right, I'll give you a scenario all. I'm like a Lewis expert. I can weigh in on this.
I'll tell you if he was annoyed by that.
All right.
I'll give you a scenario.
This could be like a segment.
Was Lewis annoyed?
Okay.
Hit me with your situations and I'll let you know.
Okay.
Scenario number one.
We had just finished the Dota tournament.
Lewis said, I'll get pizza.
And everyone was excited. And he get pizza. And everyone was excited.
And he bought pizza, and it was
vegan pizza. And I did not
hide my disdain for the
vegan pizza.
Which was insulting to Lewis.
He had produced this pizza.
I was happy to quietly
eat it, and very obviously, I mean,
I couldn't conceal my disgust
because I had one piece and i
clearly didn't look happy but i wouldn't say this is bullshit and throw it on the on the ground no
okay he just said to me what did you think of that pizza and i said do you want my honest opinion and
he laughed knowing that it was not going to be a positive review and i said i thought it was dog
shit uh but it was it was um it was unkind of me i shouldn't have done that no no actually p
flax that didn't annoy me at all and you know what i was just as annoyed because i thought
that pizza was fucking shit um but i didn't want to upset you shouldn't just order vegan pizza for
like how many people were there you should have done about 10 of us i think there well okay
even if lewis was annoyed uh that's on him i had had talked to JD and he said, I love this vegan pizza place.
You should try it.
It's called Purezza.
I always order from there.
And he's vegan at the moment.
And a couple of other people were as well.
So when I asked everyone, everyone I asked, even you, I think you just said you were like,
I think you shrugged when I said.
I was tired.
I was hungover and tired.
Exactly. So I don't think i i checked right you didn't ask me whether i wanted vegan pizza i will say that
no but uh it was they only had it and i thought it would be fine and i was disappointed people
that aren't used to vegan cheese you can't hit them with it i could not be annoyed too much if
anything i was annoyed at myself p flex-Flex. So don't...
I was going to say,
I don't think Lewis would have been annoyed in that situation.
Knowing Lewis as intricately as I do,
I would say that that is no annoyance.
But it was right in front of everybody
that I was slating the pizza.
And he just bought us all pizza.
I was embarrassed.
And I felt bad.
But I felt that I added to that.
And I should have just said you
know what thank you for the pizza that's what i should have took ages to arrive and it did take
a long time there wasn't really enough of it even though it wasn't very good everyone just like it
was like it was gone you know um and there were more people sticking around than i expected as
well because like i expected it i was i ordered like three pieces right six of us and then four
more people turned up i've had experiences like that in the office as well where there's a lot of people there and
pizza gets ordered in and you walk up to the to the box to get a slice and it's all gone like
they're they're like vultures they are vultures yeah i don't know how it comes in and everybody
loses their fucking mind for some reason like and then they complain about it it's crazy and
then complain about it here's the second one here's the second one are you ready for this sips this
is a definite lewis annoy okay okay well let's see we'll see about so prior to coming down lewis
said to me would you like to play a board game with some of the longest johns uh after on thursday
you know so i came down i think we did bolt action didn't we on the Thursday when I got there
and then I think
we cleared all that away
and at like 5 o'clock
it was a lot more
tiring than I expected
it to be
hold on
it was a long day
at 5 o'clock
a bunch of the people
I normally go to the pub with
started going to the pub
and I was like
I'm going to play
a board game first
I promised this
I'll play a board game
and I want to play
this board game
I'll see you guys
after that
so they're all down
at the pub
and there's me and the longest johns and i walk into the room the board game set
up i thought this was going to be like an hour hour and a half board game this thing no this
thing was like the the battle plans for operation overlord laid out it was fucking enormous there's
like 5 000 miniatures a billion counters Everybody's got like all these cards and decks
and the board is huge.
You've got this, that.
It's all very complicated.
I was like, oh my God.
And I said, and I think it was probably
the worst question to ask,
how long do you think this is going to take?
And they were like, four or five hours.
And then they were like,
and that's the short version.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I was like, oh my God.
And then I'm getting messages.
Where are you?
Come to pub. And I was like, I'm playing a board game. And they were like, throw the God. And then I'm getting messages. Where are you? Come to pub.
And I was like, I'm playing a board game.
And they were like, throw the game.
Get down here.
So Lewis said I was kind of dancing around like a kid waiting to get out of school.
And he thought, and this was wrong.
He thought I deliberately tried to throw the game so that I could go to the pub, which is not the case.
I actually made the winning play, Lewis, if you remember. We won the game. And then I legged it out of there to the pub as fast as I could go to the pub, which is not the case. I actually made the winning play, Lewis, if you remember.
We won the game, and then I legged it out of there to the pub as fast as I could,
which felt kind of rude.
Lewis was annoyed because I had agreed to play this board game.
I just didn't realize it was going to take 15 years.
Okay, maybe he would have been slightly annoyed,
but can I ask you a crucial question?
Was he able to almost give you a tutorial of the game?
Absolutely.
Whilst and before you're playing it.
Well, that cancels out the annoyance because I think he lives just for those moments, like the tutorial moments.
So I think anything that happens after that, he's already climaxed at that point.
Right, right, right.
He's hit his apex.
So he's just like, okay, cool. i i don't think again i don't think
that's an annoying no he was annoyed because he was annoyed he told everyone i was i was annoyed
yeah oh he was i misread the situation then apologies so but i i i i was also understanding
to some extent but i i think it was just like um there were a few moments
where i think that yeah we i didn't try to throw i did not try to throw there was one point
sips you you basically you have a crew what's the game called this it's called ever rain there you
go so you basically imagine cthulian monsters are coming out of the fucking woodwork and they're
getting on ships and sometimes they get on your ship.
You've got a crew of like a sort of, you know,
18th century crew of a ship.
You have to sail around,
explore this sort of tiled seascape
with islands and cities
and you can do various things at the ports.
The crucial thing is you have to pay your crew.
So I went into a port,
I got some really good crew.
Lewis was like,
you know you don't have enough money to pay these guys. I was like, a port. I got some really good crew. Lewis was like, you know, you don't have enough money
to pay these guys.
I was like,
shit,
what can I do to make money?
One of the things
you can do in port
is gamble.
If you win,
I would have enough money
to pay my crew.
If I lost,
I would not have enough money
to pay my crew.
So I gambled
and I lost
and I did it
because I wanted the security
of having enough money
to pay my crew.
I didn't have enough either way.
I would have had to lose somebody.
So I thought,
you know what,
let's go for it.
And of course I failed.
And I never got any more money.
I sailed off into just open waters for the rest of the game.
But I did manage to then win the game.
Yes, you did.
And you know what?
It worked out fine.
Just through sheer luck, I think.
So you guys managed to win.
Yeah, and it took about four hours.
So you were on Lewis's team and you didn't take about four hours. It took about four hours and that was the halfway point
we could have kept going uh and the guys were like should we go for the full game tonight and
i was like please god no and i was like well it is my first time if this is going to take eight
hours i'm not really down for that i mean that would have been until one or two in the morning
i'm playing this board game so i thought no i mean maybe if we did it as a whole day thing where it was like i came in in the
morning and we played it all day that would be fine that room must have stunk when you guys were
done in there i bet you like somebody fresh walking in the situation hey guys had the
like you must just fucking stink in there no it wasn it wasn't smelly. It wasn't smelly.
It's air conditioned.
Yeah, it's air conditioned.
Oh, right.
It's fine.
That's fine.
That's fine.
But, so, in lieu of staying up late to play the board game, I think Perion wanted to make
up for the fact that it took till 10pm to get to the pub.
And so, of course, Perion stayed up till 4.
I was out till 4 in the morning.
This was the other thing that annoyed me
oh
the pubs open all night long in Bristol
no but they do close
but you can sometimes get a lock in
but we went to a karaoke place
we were there till 4
this was a whole bunch of us
were you up at like 4 in the morning
don't call my name
we were up at like four in the morning? Don't call my name, don't call my name. We
were up at four singing. Alejandro. It was great. I had a great night. Me and Rav's got
some chips and walked home. He went a slightly different way. I had quite a long walk by
myself, but I was humming away. I was delighted. I had a great evening. Lewis was not happy
about this. You bribed the karaoke man to stay he was he wanted to shut an additional
hour yes i paid him to let us stay out longer because i could tell that the evening still had
another hour in it uh but yeah it was it was a cracker of a night but yeah lewis was not happy
because of course we had the dope to cast the next day i was fine the first day you're a seasoned
veteran of the circuit uh you know how to drink and stay out late and do work early the next day
i'm not annoyed and i'm
not disappointed either or anything like that it's like it's it's almost like just rolling my eyes
like oh period you know i should have known i mean that's my it's it's more like typical period
kind of rather than me actually being annoyed by the way i'm not i wasn't really i see um what
should i have done just gone home and tucked myself into bed? I think you should have gone home and studied Elden Horizon
or whatever board game it was that you played
so that you could do better next time.
No, a period did fine, actually.
He picked it up really fast.
It was really fun.
We had a great time.
That big arriving in port and not having enough money
to pay your crew blunder was the tipping point.
I can't even be mad about him staying up till 4am or whatever, because that's fine.
But I think what...
Because we booked you pretty solid, right, when you were down.
Yeah, yeah. And you had a podcast
the next morning. Yes.
And you cancelled it at like
1am. Yes, I messaged Ben.
I said, Ben, I'm fucked. I'm not going to
be in tomorrow to do the podcast with you.
And Ben just said,
that's fine, no problem but i i didn't
get to i didn't see ben again the rest of the time i was there so i never really got a chance to
apologize to him that was the person i let down do you think he slammed you the whole podcast long
and then the podcast just became about people who flake out exactly right so first of all knowing
ben i'm sure he doesn't care at all and And he's also just rolling his eyes, typical.
Because this happens to Ben all the time.
We book these recordings in the morning for Trouble in Terrorist Town or main channel stuff. And we always book one extra because there's always going to be someone who pulls out, right?
For some reason.
Because it's just like that.
And so you talk to everyone and they're like, man, I never miss a recording.
Who's the guy who flakes out?
And I'm like, yes, you do. You miss like one in eight recordings because that's what happens you know
it's like oh it's like oh yeah maybe i do actually because stuff happens you know like you've got to
take take your cat to the vet or you've got some dentist appointment or some shit you know or
brandy or something's going on or you just oversleep you know everyone is equally unreliable
because one in eight times we can't do it.
Same with Triforce.
Like, I think about, you know,
one in six or seven or eight weeks,
we just can't make it.
Yeah, I almost had to cancel this one
because of weird appointments and stuff like that.
It's just being realistic.
So it's weirdly, it weirdly works out that
we almost always get seven,
which is a nice round number for for these
games where there's two traitors and five innocents yeah um yeah and so i don't know it's like it's
it's just something we're used to period and and don't don't worry no one's really bothered it's
just um okay it's just a thing that happened at the time that we're like yeah well but we prepare
for this this is because we're used to it with certain other people who are sometimes just not feeling it.
Like certain people we record with quite often have,
I don't want to say mental health issues,
but like, you know, like they just...
They've got to be in their zone.
They've got to be in the right mood.
They have to be in the right mood.
And there's no point pushing it if they're not.
And I always say this to people, like, look,
if you get up and you're not feeling well,
or you've not slept, or like you don't want to do it, that is not a problem you you should be able to cancel don't feel like
everything all the time and i push through so i don't know like why you know but that i think that
isn't everybody else normally self-inflicted though right most people when they've got
something the day after they're not like staying out till four no i'm certainly yeah yeah well i'm intrigued to hear
what listeners of the triforce podcast make of these uh these simple interactions and and uh
the judgments to be handed down uh it's quickly forgotten and honestly i think overall we had a
great time and brilliant it was a really good trip down we
i like having stuff to do i hate it when i'm sitting around the office with nothing to do
because i think i'm wasting everybody's time i'm in the way because i'm in an office and you think
jeez people are working and here's me yapping away about bullshit and you know annoying everybody
they're not really working there though i like you've been in the office before like everybody's
just like they spend all morning figuring out what they want to eat for lunch and then they
spend all afternoon eating their lunch that is not that may be for the the ogs but i mean for the uh
nina always seems very busy harry is always i'm just kidding uh i'm just joshing around
every time you make the offense i write your name down in my book.
And I keep knocking on it.
They've got a basement.
The ultimate reckoning comes, period.
You will be punished based on how many strikes you have.
Oh, God.
In my little offenses book.
That's every time I've gone out to the pub and got drunk.
I mean, I'm doomed.
I am doomed.
Period.
Flax took two cans of coke from the fridge.
You know you're in trouble when he turns up with his uh with his rubber turtleneck sweater like dexter style with the gloves and
stuff that's that's the reckoning day when i pull out my little notebook start scribbling in it yeah
i i know this isn't a mailbag episode but i thought this was quite a funny um
letter very short one do you mind if i read it oh yeah go for it yeah this is from
uh tom and the title is an insufferable listener all right this made me laugh big fan of the
triforce podcast have been listening since 2017 when i was first at uni thanks tom because of
some thanks tom but because of some personal issues i was back and forth from my home and
halls a lot and i would put the podcast on in the car when my mum was driving me
there and back. Unfortunately, my
60-something mother doesn't seem to understand
that you guys can't hear her
when she replies to, or tries to
correct, the things you say.
Drives me up the wall. She even calls you
Ted, Lewis, and Chris like you've
been mates for 30 years.
Just thought you'd like to know about someone
who is perhaps your oldest and most infuriating fan. she sounds great she sounds brilliant let's get her on the
show i'd love to i'd love for her to correct us like a little bit in the background because we
say a lot of dumb stuff it's true yeah yeah we say a lot of stupid things and we need some elders
no i don't think we do i've said this
before when people pop up and and say uh oh you guys go this wrong i said imagine like imagine
that we're just at the pub or we're out for dinner or we're sitting on a park bench having
our sandwiches or something we're chatting and you stopped you were earwigging on our conversation
and you were like that's funny yeah these guys, yeah, these guys are funny haha, wait a minute excuse me, you've got that wrong
you wouldn't do that, you would never go up and
correct someone you didn't know
you wouldn't go up and just offer a fucking
actually, just fire up like 25 wikis on your phone
and you'll see right here, you wouldn't do that
on GameFAQs
that what you're saying is
wrong, yeah, no you wouldn't do it
but equally, you wouldn't think
this is where
i'll glean some knowledge by listening to these three idiots talk on a park bench you wouldn't
so you wouldn't correct us but equally you wouldn't use us as a source i don't know so
therefore we don't need to be fucking it's a weird comparison though because we're we're doing this
for uh like public consumption right so i i'd liken it more to like it's like our version of being
heckled i think you know like it's like how a stand-up would get heckled or you know like a
stage show might have like uh some heckling or whatever this is just for this is our heckling
this is this is just what we have to to to overcome we got to deal with it yeah and uh and and somehow
you know melded into the to the you know what i mean like it and somehow, you know, meld it into the,
you know what I mean?
Like, it's just,
I think it's just heckling.
It's just a bit of heck,
just a gentle little heckle.
Even I don't call you Chris and Ted.
No.
Right.
I find it so weird to call you that.
Flax calls me Chris sometimes.
It's weird though,
because most people do not call me that.
I do, I call you that when
i'm with your around your family but only about half the time yeah it feels like only when i
remember that that's actually your name it's funny though because if we have people over
um whatever people end up calling me people normally just end up calling me dad or or daddy because i'm referred to that mostly around my
house right so yeah i do as my parents when they come over they start calling me daddy which is
kind of weird um it's it's you know it does happen i have people in chat do that quite often
hi dad and i always tell them i'm not their fucking dad and they need to stop doing that
right but you seem to embrace it oh i don't know if i necessarily embrace your reactions
i'm not your dad i'm not your fucking dad i have kids i have kids i'm not gonna let someone else
call me dad just because they're fucking old and online i'm not your dad there's a few your
reactions they're a little bit unexpectedly angry we talked about the drivers one was so
fucking good though that have you seen have you heard the clip of the drivers have you heard this
drivers oh my god that was unbelievable it's so fucking funny you know like uh lewis you might
not really have uh these situations because of the studio and stuff like that when you're streaming
but certainly flax myself and anybody who streams from home with their own studio and stuff like that. When you're streaming. But certainly Flax, myself.
Anybody who streams from home.
With their own setup and stuff.
Will have experienced this.
And it's when something doesn't work.
Unexpectedly.
Or just out of the blue.
Right?
Like your audio will just break.
Or something really small.
But it has a big impact and then twitch
chatter are furiously trying to troubleshoot for you all your viewers are fucking it experts
every single one of them coming out of the woodwork like true it experts they recommend
the most fucking obvious thing en masse first um so the driver's clip is basically period getting annoyed at this and
saying of course i fucking tried the most obvious fucking thing like immediately that's the first
thing i did uh but the rant was uh was beautiful it was it was so um i think it was very eloquent
too like it was really nice yeah it's good it spoke to us all. Anyone who streams, you're like,
I have been there, brother. I get it.
But most people wouldn't shout.
I have no patience.
I'm
playing a hard game like Tarkov
and some fucking idiot popping up
and saying some dumb shit.
I'm not going to engage with them in a pleasant way
because what the fuck are you doing?
I must have driven a lot of viewers away,
but I just can't stand it.
The usual kind of shit that people do,
the same tired old jokes.
This is it.
This is the thing we talked about.
Because you could get banned in periods chat
for making a data.
You can get banned in periods chat
for mentioning my name.
Yes.
No, that's not the case.
That's not the case i i said last night
changed it now so first of all i never ban people just for saying sips or lewis never
we had a command for a long time which was lewis and it was like period does not have a tracking
device inside of lewis because people be like hey period where's lewis as if i fucking know like i
don't know we don't live together if i live with you
or something he lives in bristol i live in london i don't know where lewis is it was like all the
time and i get it i i totally get that because if someone came into my chat and asked me you know
where's this guy that i like more it doesn't exactly it doesn't they're not asking that but
it kind of sounds like no no they are no, no, they are. And the biggest one, obviously, Sips' stream is considerably bigger than my stream.
Has way more subs, way more viewers.
I get it.
People come in and say things like,
hey guys, Sips has just started streaming.
Which is like, what are you doing?
In what other frame of reference would you ever do that?
Yeah, you're fucking loving it.
But what I did was I banned the word Sips.
Because that way, I've just put it on my banned words list, you fucking loving it but what i did was i banned the word sips because that way
like i've just put it on my band words list you cannot say it so people found all these ways
around it they do like s1ps and stuff like that so i banned those where i can nice and they would
literally come in and say peering do you know when sips is streaming when is sips going live
why aren't you playing this to sips did you see sips sips sips sips and i was like can we not just
turn this into the sips waiting room channel?
That's not fair. I am humbled, but
I wish they would have maybe picked
like XQC's stream or like
somebody who has like fucking
80,000 viewers to do the
advertising. Go do that in a big stream.
Surely. Please.
I'd love it if everyone left your
chat as well.
You would just exit it. Everybody sit there with hands held out.
You've got like zero viewers.
Oh, Sips is live?
Everybody fucking leaves.
It's like, well, what the fuck?
So yeah, I have banned people for that because it's just obnoxious and shitty.
Yeah, yeah, that's understandable.
Oh man, that's so funny
so much fun isn't it it's just this dream it is a bonkers life it is just wild it's just a
wild ride everybody gets to jump on and have a go kinda I man. Some things are meant to be shared,
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Do you guys want to hear... So Sam Morris, who is our podcast producer,
shout out to Sam.
He's put together a little list for me
of assorted gaming and pop culture news from the last
week. Sorry,
did Sam listen to last week's podcast
and think, fuck, these guys need help and produce
the list? I think so. Holy crap.
Thank you, Sam.
The first article is
a man named, or a lady
maybe, named Vosguil
who collected, he got some
vintage Nintendo playing cards now
of course nintendo made playing cards before video games and board games as well they made
pinball and things like that didn't they they were they were this quite big company before
video games came along and so they this guy has found these two vintage sets of nintendo playing cards which are still sealed and of course he
wanted to do a pack opening and look through them but they had been pressed together for so long
that the card got stuck to the cards were joined together in one solid brick of 52 cards oh no
and so it's just this one like solid square of paper was he able
to separate them no oh and no holy shit that's unfortunate yeah you could have made a he could
have made a butt ton of money off of that selling them all individually yeah yeah putting them into
their own little plastic sleeves and it's almost like it's a bit ironic because the only card
that's visible is the Joker, effectively.
So it's kind of like, this is what happens with old stuff, though, isn't it?
I guess it must have been...
It's the latest in this trend of playing cards and unboxing and things of value.
Opening stuff, yeah.
In the Pokemon card trend, people are getting Nintendo cards from the 50s
and thinking that they're going to be the ones that get cracked open. All right, next. In the Pokemon card trend, you know, people are getting Nintendo cards from the 50s, you know,
and thinking that they're going to be the ones that get cracked open.
All right, next.
Iowa State Fair's Big Boar Contest, okay, is a thing that happens every year.
What do they do?
Big boar?
Big boar.
So, like, they feed up boars to be as big as they possibly can.
Oh, okay.
And the heaviest boar wins, right?
And they're like 1,000 pounds plus. Right, they fatten it up.
Right.
They're massive.
So they just load it up.
Yeah.
And so typically there's like 10 entries, but this year, because the cost of...
I don't know.
It's either the cost of pig feed or the heat, the hot summer.
Maybe pigs lost their appetite but only there were only
two pigs that were big enough this is a very common thing recently for me i've heard a lot of
this um in in gaming and stuff too there's a lot of games that have been changed or nerfed where
uh the cost of juicing something up outweighs the potential return that you'll get from deploying that juiced
up thing right i mean like deploy the juiced up hog deploy the juice that's right wait for the
profits to arrive and then but the profits don't come in or they're not enough to cover the initial
cost of juicing i mean i guess this is common prestige these days the prestige of having a
giant pig uh i just think it's interesting because you know this can't be healthy for the for the for
the hog i'm sure it's happy but uh those hogs are all end up getting killed anyway though right
yeah that's true but it's you know this that's not the you can't mistreat them until then. Don't worry about the pig. It's going to be eaten anyway. Marv Raitima, 73, of Sioux Centre, bought his pig, Pee Wee, at an auction last summer.
He was £950.
Jesus.
That's expensive.
Oh, my God.
What is that in kilos?
That's half a tonne.
Oh, wow.
Half a tonne.
That's 400 kilos.
450.
And he gained another 170 pounds by the time Marv showed him at the city fair.
What the heck was Marv feeding him?
Well, let's read on.
He's raised pigs nearly all his life and started by adding dried milk to the feed.
But the pig didn't like
it he'd say he'd take one sniff of it and he'd walk away he turned out to be a jerk in fact he
had a really picky taste and he would only eat very high sugar stuff and so marv picked up a
bunch of out-of-date donuts that were due to be tossed away um from casey's bakery right yeah and he
turns out the pig really loves cream filled long johns okay long johns i don't know what they are
what's a long john it's i think it looks like it's like a kind of like a hot dog bun-shaped donut. Oh, it's a donut. It's a long donut. Okay. Filled with cream.
Right.
Gotcha.
All right.
So every week, he would drive past the store and fetch up to 25 pounds of donuts with gallons
of fresh, creamy milk from a nearby dairy farm.
Nice. It's been incredibly expensive having
to get this stuff says marv it's not a cheap hobby but what hobby is um and so if it's such
a strange thing to call that a hobby hobbies and interests uh fattening pigs big hobby i stayed up
all night last night till 2 a.m fattening up my pig i justing. It's a big hobby of mine. I stayed up all night last night till 2 a.m. fattening up my pig.
I just love it.
I can't get enough of it.
It's such a thrill.
It's such a weird hobby.
Yeah, you'll meet up over the weekend with your fat pigs and discuss.
Oh my God.
A typical meat pig is 280 pounds, but this one this year was 1,300 pounds.
Holy crap, man.
Does the pig even move? I imagine it just looks like a gigantic beach ball man. Does the pig even move?
I imagine it just looks like a gigantic beach ball.
What's the pig's name?
Little pig legs poking out.
The pig's name is Pee-wee.
Pee-wee Fat Pig.
Let's have a look.
God, he's huge.
Can his little trotters even touch the ground?
Yeah, dude.
So I'll send
Put a link in this code. Unfortunately, this is one of these stupid news sites you have to
Let me see. I'll just get the picture. Hold on a second
He's I can see it. You see that. Yeah, look at the size of that fucker
But look his little feet touch the ground. He just looks like a big pig
He doesn't look like I guess they're built to to get big like
if your dog got this fat they would just lie there like i've seen really fat cats and they just like
balloons they could barely walk this guy looks like yeah i'm ready for this he'd look at the
power in those he's holding it well yeah he's just like he's the. They look so jovial, eh? Look at how happy they look. He's loving it.
I know.
He's a good lad.
Yeah.
What a life, though.
I do love a pig.
What a happy little face they've got.
Piglets.
Little piglets are so cute, man.
Holy crap.
Reminds me of the Goblin King from Lord of the Rings.
That big, fat emperor of all the goblins with all the chins.
Which one's that? lord of the rings from must
be from the hobbit in fact oh yeah i never saw that i heard it wasn't very good but then some
people have said it's not not that bad it's not as bad as people say the hobbit movies are terrible
mate they're terrible they are bad they are really bad yeah there's you could you can get like a cut
which cuts out all of the bad stuff and Actually, what's left is pretty good.
You shouldn't need someone to edit a nine-hour trilogy down to be watchable.
But yeah, it's really poor.
On this subject, or loosely related,
have either of you watched the new Game of Thrones, House of Dragons?
Mrs. F has watched some of it, yeah.
There's only one episode.
She watched that then.
I haven't watched it yet.
She liked it. She said it was good.
We loved Game of Thrones
like everybody else before we went to shit. We loved it.
She really
likes that fantasy stuff.
She loved Wheel of Time.
She loves all that.
So yeah, she enjoyed it. I'm sure if you liked
Game of Thrones and you want to see more of it,
go for it. Yeah, I like Game of Thrones.
She said it was very violent,
which kind of put me off, because I always felt the violence in Game of Thrones.
I don't mind someone being, like,
run through with a sword, you know?
But when it feels... Oh, that's the exact
violence. Yeah, that is... Right. But when it's
literally, like, in Game of Thrones
they do, it'll be like, they'll slowly run the sword up their belly and they sort of go like this is too much
i just want to chill now i've seen a murder uh recreated as expertly as possible it's a bit much
sure it has got those moments yeah um what did you think lewis i liked it i like matt smith as the oh not matt smith oh he's actually good
he's good mate i can't stand him he's done a lot of bad stuff he's done a lot of shit
he was in morbius for fuck's sake yeah matt i don't i didn't i don't like doctor who i just
well he was gonna be in the last star wars you know matthew robert smith he going to be in the last Star Wars. Matthew Robert Smith. He was going to be in the return of Skywalker or whatever it was called.
He played Prince Philip in The Crown as well, apparently.
Yeah, he was okay in that.
Honestly, House of Dragons, I'm big into Game of Thrones.
I've been playing the miniatures game on the weekends.
I went to this local village hall.
Did I tell you this?
To play this miniatures game? It was just me and two old men yes and it was one of them
trying to throw the game on purpose so that he could go to the no it was fine
we mean me and Ben's friend played played the song of ice of five inches
game it was it was good. No, we...
I'm into the...
There's only one episode so far, so we'll see.
But Sam actually added this to the notes.
He says, there's a bit in the show where people talk about, like,
how you smell like dragon, kind of have a shower kind of thing.
And the other ones are like,
they just talk about what dragons smell like a couple of times.
It's a bit weird. And then everyone on the internet has been trying to ask
scientists what um dragons smell like and so apparently um the strongest smell associated with
komodo dragons and bats is urine which smells like um but also some some give off an odor of burnt oranges fungus and corn tortillas
right um and so and the other thing is about because komodo dragons they eat raw meat right
which is obviously different to the smell that would you would get from the barbecued or flame grilled meat that
i guess the dragons eat um so that there's not really an animal that eats charred meat you know
that we have a comparison for you know because even dinosaurs would eat raw meat right like a
carnivore so well we assume yeah i mean nobody was really around to to fact
check you know yeah i mean also these are not i don't think a komodo dragon although it's called
a komodo dragon you couldn't really compare it to a fucking dragon like they would smell of like
sulfur or whatever mechanism they produce fire they'd probably fucking reek because they're big
animals i reckon it's sulfur they
haven't even written this in the fucking yeah that makes more sense but you know what it's
gonna smell like it's gonna smell like you know old world sulfur and and fire and uh and just
dragon stank just bo from a dragon just a bunch of ass just just you Just that pet shop smell. Yeah. You know?
But like absolutely juiced up pet shop smell.
Oh, yeah.
To the max.
Just juiced out of the gills.
Yeah.
What else we got in this stupid list?
So it's a black hole that people have been analyzing the audio from.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
analyzing the audio from oh yeah okay and you know how like the video games make these like black holes and things sound like that like that kind of instinct like the dark
kind of song sound of the the epic space you can imagine what a black hole sounds like in your head
right yeah it's just like a like a like a like a white noise drumming sort of noise isn't it like a low hum or something yeah
yeah um maybe we could put the sound in here and i can like i'll just play it to you as well
unless let me link you this send us a link i want to hear what a black hole sounds like is it like yeah imagine it was just like a series of like uh pan flute
sounds like uh all right here we go i'll listen to this hold on
good lord oh that's eerie that's terrifying it's weird isn't it so you so if you're out in space
and you're approaching that bad boy that's what you? Well, so what they're saying is there's so much gas around it
that there's actually a medium for the sound to travel in.
Yeah.
This is a misconception.
This is what is this tweet, which is from NASA.
From NASA exoplanets.
It's probably accurate.
It says, the misconception is that there is no sound in space
because most space is a vacuum.
However, a galaxy cluster has so
much gas that it sound can travel uh that's probably a big scam isn't it don't they like
north american uh scamming association am i right guys isn't it crazy it sounds like
uh some sort of eldritch horror doesn't it does like a sort of a terrifying dark is it a lot of people comparing it to the the Mass Effect
Reapers you know right yes weird it's a strange sound yeah it's so the initial
sound actually is so incomprehensibly low right That it's so deep that they've had to move it nearly 60 octaves up.
Jesus.
What about...
60 octaves.
That's like 10 pianos, I guess.
That's like the difference between going like...
Like that.
Like that's an octave or a few octave shift, right?
So they're saying...
They've had to do that 60 times.
Like way lower than that like super lower than you could ever reproduce presumably uh with with the the human
of course yeah so there's no way that humans could actually even register the unmanipulated
sound waves but uh they do exist and they are so deep that in fact they've been pitched up
144 quadrillion times to make that sound amazing because space is so fucking foreign to us it's
mad i think about it all the time like every time i see a picture of space or i'm watching
something about space i watch a lot of space stuff on the internet it's so bafflingly insanely
huge and mystifying and impossible to know and unreachable and fascinating
that it just consumes you and I try not to get too deep into a black hole, if you like, of space
stuff, because I'll just disappear.
And you end up giving up.
It makes you feel very
nihilistic about things and think, well, what
the fuck is the actual point?
But then luckily, Professor Brian Cox brings
us back down to Earth and says
things like, you know, we are
just shrubs on the edge
of the highway of the galaxy.
But without those shrubs, is there a motorway there at all?
And our corner of the galaxy is inhabited by, as far as we know, the only intelligent life that we've yet discovered.
And for that reason, we might be the most important discovery that we've ever made.
Something like that.
Thank you, Professor Brian Cox.
I was worried there for a minute those meaningless platitudes yeah of just garbage well i really like the universe
i did like in his northern accent i i was a i was a non-believer in in cox for some time
but uh because it just felt like like i've always i've done this when we did the Rust RP. One of the recurring characters is Brian Cox.
And I ranted about how
he doesn't need to go to the fucking Gobi Desert
to show me sand.
He could go to Bournemouth Beach.
It's much cheaper.
This is at the license fee payer's expense.
We don't need to have him in the fucking Gobi Desert
just to run sand through his hands and say,
Mars has sand on it.
It's like, I don't need you in a desert.
You could do that in Bournemouth or just in a room with some sand.
Like, we have sand here.
So I kind of had an issue with the grandiose nature of the production of the shows.
Whereas I think when David Attenborough does it,
they've had to go see this animal.
So I get it.
Of course they have to go.
Like, if he just held up a picture of that lizard and said,
this lizard lives on so-and-so, it would would suck i want to see the actual lizards right and that's
fine but he's talking about space we can't send brian cox into actual space so he has to find
things on earth that he can use to kind of demonstrate to us this is what it might be like
but he goes to these remote locations to do something with rocks and sand you think you don't need to go at first class staying in a fancy hotel no doubt to do that i had an issue
with that but his most recent series was very good i think universe whatever it's called i
really enjoy i i don't mind when they go somewhere really alien on earth like for example there's a
couple of really weird landscapes near volcanoes or you know what about like those salt flats in uh in
peru and shit like that it doesn't even look like you're on earth anymore seems like some alien
planet i don't mind that as much um honestly so i i just i you've got you've got you've got to do
it somewhere i mean a green screen i'm on mars like i don't know if i want it to be like
that um with people jumping around in space but i don't know it has to be like you said it has to be
enough that it doesn't piss you off or take you out of it right or it's like come on give me a
break so yeah well there you go that was um our Triforce podcast for the day.
Thank you.
Thank you for listening.
You know.
Well, thanks for turning up. You don't annoy us, guys.
Don't worry.
You guys should thank me for turning up as well.
I turned up.
I wasn't going to.
I mean, I was going to fully camp.
Thank you for turning up.
Hey, thanks for also turning up.
Thanks for making this happen.
And shout out to that guy's mom who listens in the car.
Yeah, big ups to that guy's mom.
Tom's mom. Tom's mom.
Tom's mom.
God bless you both.
Tom's mom has got it going on.
Everybody remember that song?
Yeah, everybody remembers it.
And we also discovered today,
didn't we,
that Lewis was annoyed
at one point.
Yes.
And I got it wrong.
I want a strangle period as well.
Oh, God.
For purposely throwing a...
I won that game. five plus hour long board game
you would have left tips i'm just saying five hours and that was halfway through
i mean i don't know so i can get really into those games once i get going you know it was
very frustrating very bingey like i'll go to yeah it's a very frustrating game as well like
sometimes you just cannot fucking do anything oh i wouldn't like that i like being able to at least
fucking do something i didn't do anything yeah man it's um it's the nature of these things anyway
maybe we'll play with you when you come down tips yeah yeah yeah good luck bud let me know
i will yeah i'll get full trip report until 4 a. can stay up until 4 a.m. Oh, yeah, that would be nice. I can't wait for that.
More so than actually playing the game.
All right, we love you.
See you next week.
Peace.
Bye.
Bye.