Triforce! - Triforce! #282: Forgotten Disasters

Episode Date: March 29, 2024

Triforce! Episode 282! We're taking a trip through classic 90s TV shows, Flax has plans for a 24 hour stream and shares some of his favourite forgotten disasters! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

pickaxe who wants to start you want to start sips um can you okay thanks hi everyone welcome back to the triforce podcast oh Today I'm joined by Sips. Hey, hi, how's everybody doing? Goodness, nice to hear your voice, Sips. Yeah, thanks so much. Guess what I'm doing right now? Sitting on the toilet. No, I'm ordering some teats for my baby's bottles.

You like that? You're ordering teats? Teats. Teats. Yeah, I gotta order some teats. Who are you going with? Tommy Tippy or someone else? No, Philips. Teats. Teats. Yeah, I've got to order some teats. Who are you going with? Tommy Tippy or someone else? No, Philips.

All the time, baby. Okay, okay. Philips Advent. 6M plus super flow. Yeah. Oh, are they the official one for the- Official sponsors of the 2015 Summer Olympics. So all the athletes Get the good flow

From their milky mamas Get their big muscles You need that growth hormone That's right, you gotta get it in there somehow I only use Philips teats They're the best They are much easier to suck along When you hear teats

Think of Philips You can always trust Philips For a very sucky teat easier to suck along when you hear teats think of philips enormous flow you can always trust philips for a very sucky teat with prince philips company philips teats yes philips teats ghastly teats those are the teats

untrustworthy foreign teats good old english teat oh man oh good peakflex how are you Oh, man. Oh, good. Pete Flax, how are you? Oh, I'm absolutely fucking exhausted. I bet.

Yeah, it's a lot of work. I got here on the 23rd of February. Wow. And it's now the 8th of March. So we had the 24th. I don't think we did anything. And then from the 25th until today, we've had one day off and it's been very, very long days. Very, very, very long days. Let me think. On average, I'd go in at about 4pm and we've been getting back at about 2.30 in the morning.

Jeez. Okay. And it's just been like long series and lots of sitting around watching dotes and quite honestly i i understand that you you know this guy is it hassan is that his name he's a streamer i think his name is hassan sure yeah yeah i think so yeah so so he did a um some stream where he was talking about how uh i mean i don't want to get into into i haven't looked beyond the basic clip that i saw but he said something about how street after streaming a bunch of hours, he was tired and people were basically complaining and saying, oh, he's rich. There's no way he should complain, blah, blah, blah.

I don't know any of the details about what really he said, but I saw people's responses. And generally it was, you've got a job that everyone else would want, so you should shut up and not complain. And I didn't think that was really fair because it's still human to get tired. And even if this is a job that I love doing, it is still tiring doing this for like very long days and very late finishes. So I feel justified in not complaining, but grumbling about work a little bit. I think it's because you think you shouldn't be allowed to grumble about it as well.

Yeah. There is a part of us which is like, I am very lucky to be doing this. Of course. And I think anyone who's doing a job that they're passionate about, they can get tired about it and they can complain about it and they can grumble about being tired because that's like the main thing humans grumble about. Yeah. Work.

Something of mine hurts or I'm, or someone was mean to me. Yeah. Either way, the thing is, as a job, if we're doing a 10-hour shift or whatever, it's hard graft all the way. I'm not spending 10 hours chipping coal out of an ore vein or whatever. It's like watching video games and then talking about them. And it's not like physically demanding or anything like that. No. And quite honestly, especially for my role, I don't even really need to like do any in-depth analysis and bring up stats and clips and stuff like that. I just go on there to be

a sort of clown. But it is tiring to have to think of stuff to say, to improvise, to ad-lib sort of on the spot, to be on broadcast, and to try to be sort of up for that length of time. And sometimes the game is incredibly dull, and you have to go in there and talk about it and then, you know, we want to try and entertain people and all the rest of it. And after two weeks of that, it is hard. It is hard work and it is generally mentally tiring. So last night, we had the chance to finish on time, like 12-ish. And all we needed was this game to end. And one team won because they're best

of threes. One team won the first game. And then in the second game, they're doing well, they're doing well, they're doing well. And the other team started coming back into it. And if the other team wins, it's now 1-1 and we have to go to a game three and it's not going to be an early finish and we just all really felt like we deserved this early finish because we had so many late nights and i love that you're rooting for the team based on how soon you can go home literally that's such an old man i know but we're all just we're like oh come on wrap it up so we can go home. You know, we were sort of like that attitude.

But this team was definitely, definitely going to win. Game and Gladiators had come back into the game. There's no way they lose this game. And one of the players made, I wouldn't even call it a mistake. It was like an act of God that he died. His hero died and he had to buy back. And it was like a disaster. Changed the entire tempo of the game, and it was something so unbelievable, I've never seen it in Dota

before. And everyone was like, what?! So that happened, and it felt like we deserved a break, and we got it. So we got home and we were like, ugh. Everyone was so wiped out. Because the night before, I woke up in the morning morning i felt like i've been hit by a truck i was so tired my body was just broken my sleep schedule was fucked we were all exhausted it was rough i want to say like you willed it to happen guys in the room like somehow spiritually crossed over to him and he was like yeah i i just want to go to bed as well maybe they've played so many games and they're knackered as well i think so i think he had enough as well so it's just the finals left is it yeah so we've got to we've got tomorrow and the day after that's

just two series a best of three and a best of three on one day a best of three and a best of five on the next day so it's a long event eh event, eh? Very. Like it was, they normally do these things. You'll have like a group stage. Yeah. Literally two weeks. Two weeks of Dota every day, apart from like two days. Oh gosh. Yeah.

I totally know where you're coming from. I mean, when you're in a foreign place, you know, and it's not, you know, you don't have your mod cons from being at home. You know, you're in a hotel room, I assume. And it might be nice and everything, but at the same time time you're actually going out and staying out by looks plus sounds of it for like 10 or 11 hours a day and even when you're not on camera yeah you have to be you're on right because you're surrounded by people and you're in a brightly lit stage and you know you you know that in an x amount of time when this game finishes, you're going to be on camera again. Like it's, it's, it is immensely like draining, you know, I mean, I get tired. Like I always say

like, Oh God, why am I so tired when all I've done is got a taxi to an airport flown for four hours and then got a taxi. Why am I, why am I tired after traveling? Find the most tiring thing about being like, um, you know, doing an event or being out in public or whatever is that I got to like suck my gut in a lot more. When I'm at home, it's just flopping out. I don't give a damn. Right, right. You know, I'm sitting there like the World of Warcraft guy at his desk, you know, but when I'm out, I got to suck it in. Of course.

I got, you know, I got some street cred to maintain. Everybody thinks I've got, you know, a bitch in six pack and I do underneath all the fat. It's down there somewhere. But, you know, I got to suck it in big time. It's also, you're around other people, right? So, it's not like when I'm at home, obviously, when you're with your family and everything, you're way more relaxed. Whereas when you're around people like these are people I've known for years, like colleagues and stuff like that. But there's you know, the offices that we're at, you're going around, you're in someone's

place of work, you've got like, we've got like a green room which is really nice this year where we sort of chill out and watch the games and talk. But the games are like an hour long. It's hard when you're somewhere like that for two weeks doing that every day, socializing a lot more than you're used to and stuff. It's hard to decompress as well every day. Yeah. And you get to a point where you just can't. And then I think that just gets more and more on top of you as time goes on.

Probably easier to just do, you know, like a two, three day event, you know, but like two solid weeks is that's a lot. I think that would make anyone tired. Yeah. Well, it's been, you know what, I've never done the two weeks before. I've only ever come and done one week. Like normally for DreamLeague, it's a two week event and I'll do the second week because someone can't do the whole week. So I'll replace someone who could do one week and I'll do the second week or whatever. But I've been here for the whole thing. I'm doing it again later this year with another event. So I just figured while I can still do this stuff, I should do as much as I can. So I've committed to doing quite a lot of Dota stuff this year. So, yeah. Yeah, you said.

But you're regretting it now, that choice. Deeply. No, I'm only kidding. No, I'm looking forward to it. But it is, God, I'd forgotten how hard these long, long, long events are. You've really thrown yourself in with both feet this year. Do you think that you should be going the other way? Do you think you should be, like, way do you think you should be like you know taking more of like like like pushing to do the gardening you know pop down the local village

hall no um i'm not that old yet i think once i get to 50 which is like two years away right because i'm gonna be 48 later this month in three weeks I'll be 48. So in another two years, I'll be 50. I'll be celebrating my 50th birthday. Being 50 and being on an esports panel, at that point, people might be like, this guy's too old. Let's get some. You know what I mean? It's sort of a landmark.

I think you are like Patrick Stewart, kind of ageless. People already think you're ancient, but actually you're only 47 right right when patrick stewart started doing star trek i don't think he was in his i think he was in his 40s but not let's have a look and he's he's looked kind of that same age ever since you know so star First episode was 1987. Patrick Shee was born in 1940. So he was 47. So he was my age.

When he started the next generation. Yeah. Make it so. Make it so. Make me old. Engage. Yeah. Make me old.

Make me old. Did you watch... Did you watch... Deanna Troy.roy suck me off she was uh she was so hot oh my god i watched uh red letter media did a video where they uh they what they sort of did a compilation of all the little mistakes in star trek next gen but not the mistakes you would think it was little production errors that I think now that the show is in HD are even more glaringly obvious. Because if you watch the original

broadcast on a TV, it was all a bit fuzzy. Like SD back in the day, regular old telly, you can really see shit. Like it was really pretty bad. Whereas now you could see every single detail. So watch the video, it's red letter media, it's called like Plinkett's Star Trek blunders or something. And little things like, you know, actors put little marks down, like the production put tiny marks down on the set for actors to hit. You can see little marks everywhere, little bits of tape, and they'll stand on it exactly like that's their mark. And you'll see old marks that have been left from previous scenes still there. That's great.

Stains on all the carpets. Literal big splat stains all over the carpets. This is great. I love this stuff because once you start seeing it, you can't unsee it. Yeah. I really like when they take a show that was filmed in 16x9, like the old TV Square, but then they've... That's not 16x9, that was 4x3. Sorry, 4x3. And then they've... That's not 16, that was 4x3. Sorry, 4x3.

And then they've like... But they've obviously filmed it in... They get somehow... I don't know how, that they have it in 16x9. And you can see sometimes like camera people there and people holding lights. Yeah. And, you know, just bits of the set where it cuts off.

You know what I mean? I think because they would have filmed it with the same cameras you use for film, and then you just edit it down to 4.3. Like, I don't think you can film not in 16.9 if that's the format of the camera, I would assume. So I guess they're filming it as if it were for film, and they're just going, just take the middle bit. And so it's like, and they just cut it maybe. I can't imagine, because it would have been on film. It wouldn't have been digital back then. It would have been film, right? The 1987. So they would have had to use the same cameras. You wouldn't get a special camera for 4.3.

Oh, right. God, it's so weird that you think that they would be using the original film. So they've got the film, so you can upscale it to HD because you just got the film. I mean... The weird thing about tng is that it it doesn't look it has such a unique look to it the whole thing the lighting the sets like the uniforms it's so it's so out of this world yeah right you don't ever sort of well i think you may be doing some of the movies you don't really see the actual real world the real real world right um and so it sort of is fairly timeless. Like, it's obviously fucking ancient now. It's like 30, nearly 35 years old, right?

Yeah. And so, but look at anything else from the 80s. It looks like shit. It really does. A lot of TV in the 80s looks like shit. Something about Star Trek, they did a bloody good job. But something you won't be able to not see now, if you go back and watch it, they used black paper to cover up reflections in the set from the lights on the camera. So they made this shiny set for the bridge, and the problem is it was all reflective. And you're shooting lights at it, and they'll reflect back and you'll see movements and

cameras and people in the reflection of the set. It's like they've created a mirror and they're trying to film opposite it. So they covered it up with just chunks of black cardboard and paper that they sort of taped to the bits of the set that were reflective. And when you look now, there's Worf going, Captain, we're under attack and behind him. It's just like a kid's collage of black paper covering all the reflective bits. You see the boom mic reflected in the fucking set all the time. People come in, doors that don't close properly, because obviously there were people just sliding them manually. Yes, the doors are famous.

It's so good. They have these really fancy sliding doors in the show. It's just two lads pulling a door. Famously difficult. Honestly, it is so, so funny. Watch the video. It's brilliant. Yeah.

Well, I've been watching TNG recently. I watch it every now and then. It's more comforting, I think, because I used to come home on Tuesday nights and watch it after school. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And so it's got that. And I think some people have the same thing with things like Buffy.

Oh, Mrs. X's favourite show, Buffy. And other shows of the time. Yeah. And Angel, which was an off- Angel. Or whatever. Yeah. Angel was a spin-off from Buffy.

David Borealis. He was a vampire, but he was like a goodie vampire. Right. And there was that guy Spike. Yes. Who was very 90s. I don't think you'd get someone looking like him being in a TV show now. Spike?

With spiky hair. Yeah, he had spiky hair. I don't know anyone who has spiky hair apart from anime characters. What was it? Michael Hall was his name? The guy who was like, he was in the coffee adverts and then he was in Buffy. He was like the professor. I can't remember what his name was.

Oh, yes. Michael Hall was Dexter. You're thinking of the other guy. Yes. Yeah. The guy who plays Worf. No. Anthony Stewart Head. Anthony Stewart Head.

Anthony Stewart Head, yes. He did the coffee adverts and then that, as far as I can tell. The Gold Blend couple, the Nescafe blend coffee. He did the coffee adverts. Yes, for six years it was him and the Gold Blend adverts. He's a real smug prick in the adverts. Then he does Buffy the Vampire Slayer and as soon as I saw him I was like, I can't take this show seriously. He's good in it though, actually.

I never watched like Buffy or Angel or any of those shows. I think it's not, maybe not the right demographic or whatever. It wasn't for me either. The original movie, let me think, the original movie, didn't it have Donald Sutherland in? I remember when I was a teenager, a lot of people that I hung around with in high school used to drop everything to watch new episodes of Beverly Hills 90210 as well, which I was never a fan of either. Good lord.

I don't think I ever watched that. No, never a fan. Never a fan. But I remember some of the people I hung out with, they loved it. I think they had older brothers and sisters or whatever who watched it as well. Maybe that was part of the people i hung out with they they loved it i think they had like older brothers and sisters or whatever who watched it as well maybe that was part of the appeal i don't know but um yeah i just remember it being sought after you know so it was a weird there's a new there's been a new series of frasier i haven't actually watched it but it got me into watching the old ones and i've i've watched back you know like 10 seasons of frasier it's the best one of

the best sitcoms ever made at its peak it is it was so good it's i mean it's got real shrunky episodes but it's it's it is very good yeah it holds up okay again it was filmed early 2000s late 90s and it looks like shit really comparatively it wasn't even um early 2000s it was uh it was like it was like early to mid 90s when it started wasn't it yeah i'm sure it was like every time they're in a fucking car you can tell they're in a studio every time like it's so cheaply made 93 93 till 2004 i mean it's i guess it's a lot like Friends. And Friends often seems very cheaply made, right? Yeah. Like they are just basically in the apartment.

There's occasionally another set, but it's almost entirely based on them chatting and bouncing around the apartment. Yeah. I mean, Frasier, some of the episodes that sucked. If you remember Daphne, we've spoken about Frasier before on this podcast for sure. Oh, good, yeah. I'm a big fan. I watch it all the time, yeah. The episodes where Daphne's family are involved, those suck. We've spoken about Frasier before on this podcast for sure because I know we're big fans of it. Oh god, yeah.

I watch it all the time, yeah. The episodes where Daphne's family are involved, those suck. And the ones where like, the whole thing with her being, oh I'm a bit psychic, that kind of went off. They just pretended that never happened later on in the show. It's like, they didn't really know what to do with her character. I think early on they were like, she's the British sort of a woman looking after Martin. Let's give her a funny little thing. She thinks she's psychic. And then after a couple of seasons, they were like, let's just pretend that never happened

and just move on. And the whole focus of the show was like Frasier, but then the subplot was Niles loves Daphne, right? Like that was the big subplot was that he's in love with Daphne. And it's like this unrequited obsession that he has. And Frasier knows that he's in love with Daphne. But the moment that he gets it on with Daphne, the show goes to shit. It was like, they just kind of forgot that that was actually one of the best bits of it. Yeah, well, I think it was this thing where it developed though, right? You could tell it developed.

this thing where um it developed though right you could tell it developed like originally the originally it was just supposed to be oh you know just a a silly situation where this guy in his marriage has a crush on the hot housewife you know and so there's lots of good jokes there like where she's bending over and all this you know so many of the and obviously david hyde pierce does a great job as like with physical comedy as well him and him and frazier like that niles frazier to one of my favorite sort of two characters when they're together they're just brilliant there are so many great episodes in that show i i've very fond memories of it because i watched it um when uh it was on tv when i when mrs f had left for work in the morning it was just me and the baby like this is when when we had our first um and you work in the morning, it was just me and the baby. Like, this is when we had our first.

And, you know, in the morning, we're just sitting around there before we go off to a playgroup or I take it to the park or whatever. We're kind of chilling out. And they ran two episodes a morning in sequence, the entire series. I watched the whole thing. I've done the same thing. Well, there's so much. There's like 260 episodes. It's insane.

It's fun watching it in order though. And you get like, you know, you're not waiting when it was, you know, when it was airing. It was prime time, you know, you had to wait. There was a new episode every week on a Thursday night at nine o'clock or whatever. But watching it this way, you can get through it a lot quicker and it's a lot more enjoyable. It's a bit like Seinfeld too, you know, you can rewatch it in order. I think that's because the quality is like, generally, it's high, but like, sometimes it's not. And so sometimes the episodes are a bit, there's a few stinkers in there.

There are some great ones though. I mean, the one where he's got the senator and the senator believes in aliens, and he gives a speech about his support for this politician. And then he has a conversation with him where he reveals that he's into aliens. And now he has to give the same speech. But now knowing that the guy's into aliens, it changes the entire tone of the speech. It's absolutely brilliant writing. It's really clever. It's so good. And his delivery changes because obviously he now knows what the audience

knows. So it's amazing how you can take the same piece of text, and once you change the context, the entire context of that text changes. If you haven't seen it, find it on YouTube. It is magic writing. It is so, so, so good. Nice. So you know what I did this morning? I was looking up forgotten disasters.

Forgotten disasters. Forgotten disasters. Things that perhaps people aren't aware of or forgotten about, that kind of dipped out of the public radar. Yeah. So, like... There was... Like mine cave-ins and stuff that have just been long forgotten from a long time

ago. Yeah, just something that happened like over 100 years ago, or sometimes even just like 40 years ago. Yeah. Or sometimes even 30 years ago, and people have just kind of years ago, or sometimes even 30 years ago, and people have just kind of, it's just a thing that happened and we've just moved on. Right. But it's like some of these are so unbelievable that you just think,

how the hell did I never know about this? There was a TikTok where there was a sort of list of these. So one of them was the Tenerife airport disaster, which was the worst aviation disaster in history. Have you heard of it? No. Yes, I have. Well, I've been to Tenerife a few times, so I know about it. And it's quite famous, actually.

I never heard of it. Within the aviation community. It's one of the biggest deaths tolls. It's the deadliest in aviation history. 583 dead. Jesus Christ. This was two planes collided. This was on the runway they collided, because one of them was on the runway and the other one thought they'd been cleared for takeoff, and there was like a miscommunication. Comes here and on the runway, smacks into the other plane,

huge explosion. Like 60 people, 61 people survived. Two 747s collided. Yeah. 1977. 61 people survived. Two 747s collided. Yeah. 1977. Here's what I didn't realise. The reason that this happened, well obviously was pilot error and all the rest of it, but the reason that those two planes had been diverted to a different airport in Tenerife was because of something called the Canary

Islands Independence Movement. Yeah. Oh wow. There was a terrorist organisation who wanted the separation of the Canary Islands. This is also something I had never heard of. This was their sort of, you know, they didn't cause this attack directly, but indirectly, the airplanes had been diverted to Tenerife because of activity by this lot at an airport. They set off a bomb at an airport.

It didn't kill anyone, but it injured people. But people forget in the 70s, there were so many terrorist organizations, including the Canary Islands Independence Movement. I just think you've got all these other armed factions and genuinely large terrorist group, and then these lads from the Canary Islands, which is like a tiny, tiny population base. See, independence for the Canary Islands. It's like, how many of you are there? Three of us. See, independence for the Canary Islands! It's like, how many of you are there? Three of us!

I think the Canary Islands is interesting because they are this... I go on holiday there. Well, I used to go on holiday there as a kid a few times. And it's a very common place for Brits to go on holiday because it's hot all year round. It's basically just off the coast of Morocco, or actually it's off the coast of Western Sahara, which is a country in Africa which is kind of occupied by Morocco. It's a bit of a weird one. Anyway, there's nothing really in Western Sahara, it's just sand. But a lot of the beaches,

the expensive hotel beaches on the Canary Islands, they just ship over the sand from there. They just literally drive a boat over to Western Sahara, fill it up with sand, and bring it back and dump it and that's like a beautiful beach they now have outside their hotel uh it's kind of crazy but but yeah the canary islands it's a lovely place like to go on holiday because you can guarantee sunshine i'm actually going there in two weeks time um and i went with those in november yeah and her mom and her mother which was fantastic had a lovely time I went there about three years ago with Mrs F and the kids it's really nice

it's really nice the islands of eternal spring they're called because it's always like and just nice I think it's actually cool to the word canary comes from like canary ass like dogs I think canary ass not like canary the bird but like dogs because I think apparently

why don't you kiss my canary ass my like canary the bird but like dogs because i think apparently like in the day kiss my canary ass my red canary ass bright red canary ass they've always been a stopping over point you know for ships right and so i think that a lot of dogs got loose on them and then they took over the island and now they're serving uh drinks in bars yeah but but it's honestly... I think maybe this sort of independent stuff, maybe it came after the Second World War, you know, with these generations of... You know, the greatest generation kind of vibe, you know, the people who fought in the war

and were very strong about independence and freedom. I don't know, like, it definitely feels like a thing of its time, right? Because certainly Spain had had a civil war during the war, and I think the Canarians had been involved in some way as a retreat point for the government for a while, or what was left. I can't remember. There was something going on. But you can imagine how this sort of stuff happened, certainly. Although it doesn't feel like the Canary Irons would have had a very long history in the same way that somewhere like Cornwall or Catalonia might have, you know? Yeah. I mean, when was it sort of populated? Because I don't think it didn't have any native population, I would guess, because

I don't think they have a history ancient. Before the arrival of humans, the Canaries were inhabited by prehistoric animals, including the giant lizard, the Tenerife and Grand Canary are giant rats, and giant prehistoric tortoises. This is the land of the giants. Nice. Well, they were delicious though, so... Although the original settlement of what I now call the Canary Islands is not entirely clear, they think that indigenous peoples were living there at least 2,000 years ago, but possibly 1,000 years before that, and that they basically

were related to the Berbers on the nearby North African coast. So the Berbers- Interesting. It is interesting to discuss some of these places. It depends how far offshore you are to get human settlement, right? Because back in the day, it was easier to colonise America from Europe by going all the way through Siberia and across the land bridge than it was to go out into the middle of the ocean and get onto this flipping island. I mean, you've got to know it's there. You don't just set off and hope you hit an island. I mean, jeez. But I guess if you're sailing from somewhere to somewhere else, you might go past and be like, fucking hell, that's his land there. Let's make a note of that. Then you tell the admiralty

or whoever, and they send some lads back to explore it. Find a bunch of Berbers living there and they're like, we could fucking have them. Then you come back with some lads in a boat and you nick it. That was the way. It was the way we did things for hundreds of years. Yeah. I'm surprised no Vikings made it down there, you know, because they were going all through the Med. They've just gone a little bit further down the coast. But I think generally, if you're heading, let's say you're heading from Europe down to go around Africa.

They're following the coastline. Yeah, they go in coastline. I mean, this is how most of the stuff, right? Because like in Civ, they had boats that could only go in coast tiles, not sea tiles. Right. That's my education as well. That's true. So did I mention the campaign for North Africa on our last podcast?

No. Vaguely remember this? Did I mention the board game campaign for North Africa? Oh, yes, you did. I did? Damn it. I just want to talk about it all the time. You just want to talk about it all the time, don't you? I downloaded the rules. Oh my God, man. You have really been, you've had a lot of free time over the last two weeks.

Yeah, well, between games when there's a pause or something, we just kind of sit there. It's weird the kind of stuff you get into like when you're away from home too, right? You don't have all of your resources so you sort of like, you make do with what you've got and sometimes that leads you down some very weird rabbit holes. Is this the one which is said that a full game takes 1500 hours to complete? 1500 hours and it's 10 player if you want to do it properly. If you and your group plays for three hours a week, you'd wrap up the campaign in about 20 years. Jesus!

Yeah, it's incredible. Holy Lord. So, I wanted- I thought we could do a 24-hour stream of the game. Oh God, I thought you were do a 24-hour stream. I thought you were going to say 24-year. No, 24-hour stream of the game. You get 20 people, 10 per team. You do it in two shifts. You could even get 30 people and do it in three shifts.

Everybody does eight hours. And it's 24-7 stream. You'd have to get a printout of the board to make it much bigger, big pieces, and you'd have sideline reporters covering the war, the whole thing. I don't know if people would ever watch it, but I think that there's a potential

that more people have walked on the moon than finished a game of Campaign for North Africa. I would be happy to see the numbers on it. Do you know what, though... These types of games that were developed in the 80s were very heavily supposed to... These war games, classic war games, end of the Cold War, or even middle of the Cold War, they were designed to try and, as accurately as possible, simulate things that had happened or were going to happen, right?

And so there's a lot of admin, right? There's a lot of – you spend a lot of time calculating yourself, right? But that's what led to the development of video game versions of it, like Hearts of Iron, right? Where so much of – imagine if you were playing Hearts of Iron, but you had to calculate everything yourself exactly logistics for each unit and you know how many of them they're down to the man like what their morale is like it's just some of these games love for you like battle tech for example

love for you to calculate so much right like i always use battle sex as an example because it's a very complicated board game but when you translate it into a digital game there's not enough right when the developers i spoke speaking to the developers about tech the game and they were very much like we've had to add in you know five times as many mechanics and complexity to this game because so much of the game is just calculating and keeping admin and that's that i think that takes away from the game personally i like there to be as little calculations possible so I can focus on what's actually happening in front of me. I often find that when I'm playing Warhammer, one of the things I dislike the most is that I think,

okay, I'm going to get my guy and he's going to shoot your guy. Then by the time I've spent 10 minutes rolling dice, I've forgotten what I was doing. I'm in a different frame of mind as well. When you're in a narrative mind and you're in a D&D game, if you have to do a long bit of calculation, that puts you in some sort of mathematical mindset where you're out. And it breaks the immersion, it breaks the happy, joyous... You have to think, where was I and what was I thinking at the time, and go back that place and it's and you're doing that all the time yeah from a game design point of view i don't want to have you know if i want to be accountant simulator i think that's what the the campaign for you know quartermaster simulator that's what some of these games are

right like they're like logistics simulation and i god I love those games as well, like Factorio and stuff, where you're planning out a vast thing to take this thing to over here and this thing to over there. I think these games that we play and get joy from are the natural evolutions of games like this. But I'm sure the campaign for North Africa involves tons, reams of paper, where you have to distribute stores and consume stores, calculate spillage of water. Yeah, it's insane.

Distribute water, determine weather. Hot weather means more evaporation of water. Calculate attrition of units short of water. Transport cargo, bring convoys ashore. Ship repair. Oh my god. Fire flak. The rules book that I downloaded, it's a PDF, is 200 pages long. And you basically have so much to do that you need a person dedicated entirely to logistics. And their entire job is managing the logistics. Then someone else's job is moving supplies from the rear to the front. Then someone's job is security and handling of prisoners for that interior area behind the front. Then you have a frontline commander who's in charge of the actual front. And then you have someone in charge of the Air Force. That's five people per team. And can you imagine if your job for 1,200 hours is managing

supply levels and evaporation of water. Some people would love to do that. I know, I know. Not for 20 years. Well, no! Maybe. There are a whole bunch of these. Most of them are World War II. I would say most of these monster board games seem to be World War II, and most of them seem to have been published in the 70s. And I think that's because once you

got into the 80s and the 90s, especially now, there are more war games that are out there on computer. So you would just play it on computer, which reminds me of... This was the other thing I wanted to talk to you guys about. When you were younger and the internet didn't exist, and you wanted to play games with your mates, you'd have to go over to their house to play games. Literally go over to their house and sit side by side to play games. What did you think was the solution to being able to play games, not having to go to each other's house, but remotely? Because the best thing we came up with was that one day we would run cables between people's

houses. We never had. I never even really thought about it. But I remember when I was young, there was a lot of like couch gaming with, you know, like NES, Super NES, the PlayStation, first PlayStation when it came out. You didn't really think about it much then. It was just, that was the way it was. There wasn't an alternative. Nobody really thought up a way for there to be an alternative or whatever.

But I also had a PC and I had friends who had PCs as well. And we did a lot of direct connect modem stuff but it was so janky because it was over a phone line so like you know you'd have a connection we'd play duke nukem 3d we'd play doom doom 2 and uh warcraft 2 those were the games that we would play direct connect but you'd be in the middle of playing and you're like building some barracks and then all of a But you'd be in the middle of playing and you're like building some barracks. And then all of a sudden you'd be like, hello? Hello?

Who's on the phone? Your mom would pick up the phone in the kitchen or whatever. Like it was just, it was annoying, right? Like it was cool, but it was annoying because it was, you'd put up with it because you were a kid. But like if I was an adult and that was happening, you know, somebody picking up the phone and wrecking the connection or whatever, it'd just be annoying, right? Like annoying to the point where you're like, oh, God, I don't know if I can really be bothered with this. Like I'll just go get a console or whatever.

It's a weird one. But like I don't remember anyone ever thinking like, oh, wouldn't it be cool if we could just do this in our own homes uh and and play these games like i think part of the fun was that we were all together in somebody's basement you know stinking it up playing mario party or whatever you know like nobody really thought like that that was that there was any alternative to that you know it was just that that was just how it was kind of thing i think that's how we thought about it anyway, but it was fun though. Yeah. I just imagined this like that one day games would be huge. Yeah.

And that you would be... I had some idea... Maybe you're like a visionary, you know? Maybe like you didn't realize it at the time but you had these visions, you know? No, I just had an imagination and assumed it would never happen. Yeah. Like the idea of the internet, it felt to me like no grown-ups were interested enough in this idea so it wouldn't happen.

Like that's how it felt. I was like, we could just... I could connect my house to your house with a cable and maybe we could play games that way. Yeah. But it'll never happen. I didn't have any notion that you could use that for things like running businesses or anything useful like that.

No, I mean, well, that's a thing, yeah. I just saw it as a way to play video games and I thought no grown-up's gonna that you could use that for things like running businesses or anything useful like that. That's a thing, yeah. I just saw it as a way to play video games and I thought, no grown-up's going to want to do that, so it'll never happen. Yeah. And then when online gaming came around, I just couldn't believe it. I could not believe that it was possible. And now, you can play games like Hearts of Iron and instead of having to manually go

figure out the water evaporation rates on the Spanish front, the computer does it for you. It's magic. Yeah. I mean, it's been around for so long though, online gaming. There used to be Microsoft Live. I mean, we're talking mid-90s, Microsoft Live, Kali. There was a whole bunch of services that you could connect to to play games, but you just had to have a good internet connection. Most people didn't because it was all dial-up, you know what I mean? I think some businesses had way better internet connections, you know, depending what the nature of their business was. But I think things really sort of transformed when cable internet came out. In North America for for us it was cable

because all of a sudden it was faster and then all of a sudden services started popping up everywhere like battle.net existed and um you know before that there was just i mean warcraft 2 shipped there was no battle.net at the time like there was the there was the option to direct connect and play with somebody or to connect to like a service like microsoft live or whatever but there was no there was no baked in um you know matchmaking service or lobby or anything like that just didn't exist but the like the the technology for actually playing against people remotely was there but it just depends on how much your phone bill you wanted to pay i guess you know like it's surprising how still there is a lot of that happening. A lot of the time, whenever I want a game on a board game, I go on the TTS Discord. You can post a little thing

saying you're looking for a game or whatever. A lot of people still do that lobby-based system. The original... God, we've talked about this tons of times but but yeah like it's it's it's a different world but it's there's still some things that are basically the same um did you i want to know more about these forgotten disasters pflex oh okay oh i closed down the tab hold on oh really i did i honestly didn't think you guys would want to hear about them i found a few more i'm fascinated by that stuff all right let me bring one up so yeah all right the victorian hall disaster this is terrible this is 1883 in some way i regret this uh the distribution of toys caused a crowd crush resulting in 183 kids getting crushed to death oh that's real bad yeah they were

they were given away these prizes they were like it like a show. It was like a variety show for these two traveling entertainers. And the kids go there and they're told that there were toys. And when the kids heard this, that a certain number of kids, there were numbered tickets and they'd get prizes. A bunch of little kids were worried they wouldn't get their prize. So they all ran down there to try to get their tickets and a bunch of them got crushed. Awful. Absolutely awful. You know, it's when you read about these forgotten disasters, that's one of the reasons why people that complain about things like safety regulations and fire regulations and occupancy restrictions, and they're like, why can't we just get on with it?

Why do we have to be told what to do? It's health and safety. It's gone mad. It's because you don't know about the Victoria Hall disaster and there was that club in Romania, I think, where there was a fire and there was only one fire exit and it was locked and fucking hundreds of people burnt to death or choked. All this shit that you've forgotten about

or haven't heard about or never knew about or will never have to experience anything like, were the precursor to some dumb rule. So a thousand kids untethered at a place like this that didn't have the standards that you have nowadays, this is what you fucking get. And awful, awful, awful disasters. The sort of thing that we just don't really hear about as much in this country these days, because people are more safety conscious. Because once you've had that, you think, fuck me, we can't have this happening again. This is terrible. So you bring in laws and restrictions and you get people who are experts in safety to try to make shit safe. Like I know

someone told me that if you're ever out driving, especially in the countryside, and you see like, you know those arrows? It's like arrows at the start of the road, like black and white arrows that point in the direction that a curve is going. They don't just put those down everywhere. Generally speaking, if there's been an accident of some kind, they're like, how did this happen? They look into it. It turns out a certain time of day, certain speed, certain whatever, you can't really see the bend. So they put these things there to prevent a future accident. So one happens, people investigate, they realize there's a problem. Tom Scott did a video on this. There's a road, I think it was

in Dorset somewhere. And the angle of these two roads approaching it to the intersection meant you had more accidents there than at any other intersection in the country. And if you were in a car, your blind spot of the pillar of your front windshield meant you couldn't see an oncoming cyclist or an oncoming car. And if you were both at a certain speed, it was just bad luck. The angle of this intersection meant that that was the case. So now we have all kinds of rules and you wouldn't design an intersection like that. But this one was designed like that. So I find it interesting to read about these things because you could then imagine why they brought in some safety restriction, why you have maximum occupancy, why you have barriers here, or

things that seem awkward, it's because of shit like this. Well, I wonder how much of the world is designed for reasons that we don't. When you're on Google Earth and you see something and you're like, what the hell is designed for reasons that we don't you know like you know when you're on google earth and you see like a something and you're like what the hell is this there must be a reason why stuff like i know there's a problem with like east west roads or something because you know like direct sunlight right you know glare right and so you you shouldn't be designing roads like that but a lot of people just do it anyway um I wonder how many lessons are unheeded, but also how many are heeded that we don't know about. That is interesting to me.

If there's a book, give it to me. It's like that QI stuff, right? That's what I want to hear. Right, go on. What's the next disaster? Let's do one more. Here's one that's a bit more upbeat. The Johnstown Flood. This is terrible. This was a dam. The Johnstown Flood. This was 1889.

It's really terrible. Sometimes called the Great Flood of 1889. A dam failed at the South Fork of the Little Connemore River in Pennsylvania, and 14.5 million cubic metres of water came steaming down- Oh God, I thought you were going to say people. No. 2,208 people were killed. That's a lot.

And about half a billion dollars in modern money of damage was done. The dam failed and basically all this water came steaming into town and just wiped it out. Absolutely wiped it out. It was just absolutely abysmal. The disaster was the largest loss of civilian life in the US at that time, up until the 1900 Galveston hurricane and of course 9-11. But the Galveston hurricane, this was 8,000 people died in the Galveston hurricane, and of course, 9-11. But the Galveston hurricane, this was 8,000 people died in the Galveston hurricane. Jesus!

This was in 1900, and it just smashed into Texas. Is that Texas? Galveston, Texas? Yeah, Texas. Galveston hurricane. Absolutely. I only know about Galveston, Texas because of the jinx. Yeah. The guy, he killed his neighbour, you remember? What was his name? Robert. Cut him up. Robert...

Oh, God. The billionaire. The billionaire. Robert Durst. Robert Durst, yeah. What a fucking weird guy. He's dead. He died, didn't he? Oh, did he? Oh, thank God. Kind of recently, yeah. I think he died in jail, actually. Good riddance. He was quite ill. Apparently, there's going to be a Jinx part two.

What is the part two? I mean, that was honestly, it was such a fascinating story. It was amazing to me, the desperation in the documentary makers. And the burping. You know, at the end, when he's in the toilet, and he's still got a hot mic. Yeah, and he's like- He's just been in the- Because you did it.

Oh, they know. They figured it out. Yeah. Why do they know? I was so nervous. Because you did it. Yeah, it was weird Yeah, they know. Yeah. Why do they know? I was so nervous. Because you did it. Yeah, it was weird.

And the burping. He was burping the whole time. Oh man. Nervously burping through the whole interview. So, the Galveston hurricane, the highest point in Galveston was only two meters above sea level. The hurricane brought a storm surge four meters deep that just washed over the entire island and just fucking killed all these people.

It's just terrible. That's insane. Yeah. That is insane. God. So, no, but I mean, the Victorian era, like these hurricanes and floods, you know, it was all a kind of, you know, the idea was that it was like a golden era you know a gilded age of no health and safety where anyone can do what they want to build anything you want but of course

we're all humans and everyone's going to do it for the cheapest they possibly can and the bare bare minimum effort you know they're going to skimp out and they're going to use the fewest nails they can find and they're going to be made of of you know the wrong material everyone was just shonkily you know yeah given and given no shits and it would be the same way today if people could get away with it you do see this stuff even on tiktok right of like snagging it's like a new build house and the whole thing is like completely fucked yeah right yeah it's like it's just because the builders have like like the walls hanging off and all the power sockets have got water running behind them. Do you know what I mean?

It's a fucking nightmare. So the 1931 China floods, the Yangtze-Huai River floods. Okay, before you go on, the 1931 China floods. Now, this is something I've obviously never heard of. This is something he holds dear to his heart. He knows all about it. But let's just imagine how many people died here. Okay, have a guess. Let's play this game. How many died?

We've already done a flood in Galveston. That was a hurricane. That was a hurricane, and it killed 8,000 people. The flooding of the Yangtze River, I'm going to say like 30,000 people. You are so far. You are off by possibly a factor of 100. Wow. Okay.

What? 4 million is the upper end of the estimation. Jesus. About 300,000 people straight up drowned when this river flooded. Oh, man. But several million starved to death as a result of this flood. It is absolutely appalling. Jesus Christ.

That's- I did not realise that. The top three are all China. This is like death tolls. The 1887 Yellow River flood, 2 million people, and the 1976 Tangshan earthquake. Have a guess, how many people died at the 1976 Tangshan earthquake? Another thing I've never heard of. I'm gonna say like 10 million. No, not quite that many. I don't want to be wrong this time.

That's fair. In an earthquake. They can be very dangerous. Yeah, they can, yeah. Between a quarter and half a million people died in this earthquake. Absolutely unbelievable. Like, just terrible. Terrible, terrible, terrible. An 8.1. Flip. I mean... That's a big one. Terrible, terrible, terrible, terrible. An 8.1. Flip. That's a big one.

Is this because there's just a lot of people there in these areas? Are they very fertile? Is it because it's flood? I'm not saying this is the case, but is it because it floods that it is fertile, that it can support a lot of population? Are these things linked I mean? Are these things linked? Well, certainly I'd say population density. For example, looking at the deadliest natural disasters in the 20th century, the top 10 that I see here, until we get a country that I would not list as being one of those densely populated countries, so China, India, China, China, Bangladesh, Japan, North Vietnam I don't think is as densely populated, but China, India, China, China, Bangladesh, Japan, North Vietnam I don't think is as densely populated, but maybe it was. Oh, it's Hanoi. So yeah. But then

we get to the 1908 Messina earthquake in Italy, 82,000 people died in this earthquake. I mean, remember back then, first of all, aid relief and rescue efforts would have been extremely basic compared to modern standards. Nowadays, there's an earthquake. People are there within the hour, like solving problems, helping people out, digging people out. They can even, to some extent, predict, well not predict earthquakes, but get early warnings. Right? At least that's something we're even considering. Certainly, that is something you can do with tsunamis as well. I know the Asian tsunami that killed a lot of people in 2004, I want to say, 2007?

I can't remember. That was something that was very unexpected. There wasn't a lot of early warnings for it, and as a result, a lot of people were caught off guard. But I guess if a tsunami happens off the coast of Western Sahara, there's no one there. Do you know what I mean? Right. But if it happens outside a major tourist population center with millions of people on the beach, that's a big problem.

Yeah. And I think it might not... I don't want to say it's bad luck, because you know that this stuff happens all the time. There's always some natural disaster going on in the world, right? But a lot of it happens in areas that doesn't have an impact, you know, or no one lives there. Yeah. Like Tunguska. You know about Tunguska? Is that the one that killed the dinosaurs? No. This was an impact in Siberia. And here, I'll read to you about it. Tongue-guts-guts.

What was the one that killed the dinosaurs called? That was... Oh gosh, I could tell you if I had five minutes to think about it. Chicxulub. Yeah, the Chicxulub crater. That's like where the Gulf of Mexico is essentially a big crater. It's like off the coast of like Ecuador, isn't it? Yeah, it's like that's where they think the- that's where they think the big one landed and just absolutely fried the planet for millions of years. Because they found like ejecta, which is like the shrapnel if you like from these

big impacts, fucking miles away. Oh yeah, well there would have been. I mean, it was fucking huge. It's just unbelievable. It's just unbelievable. So the Tunguska event, which sounds like an SCP entry but is actually real, was this 3-5 megaton explosion in 1908. It was in very sparsely populated eastern Siberia. They think it was a meteor airburst. That's what they think it was. The atmospheric explosion of a stony asteroid about 200 feet across, about 60 meters wide. And it came in, probably got unstable as it's coming through the atmosphere, and basically exploded about 5 to 10 kilometers up. So it didn't hit the

Earth's surface, so it left no crater, just exploded. Flattened this vast area of forest, about 830 square miles, just completely flattened and devastated by this explosion. But yeah, I mean, you can imagine that could have happened over London, but it didn't. So things like that. Obviously the earth is very big, most of it is water, so much of this shit is going to come crashing down in the water. How does three megatons compare to like, a nuke? I think the one that was detonated over Hiroshima was that one megaton? I think it was, yeah.

Let's have a look. We've got the facts at our fingertips in this day and age. Just a quick search, you can answer any question you might have. Maybe it was bigger. Oh, 15 kilotons? So a megaton is a thousand of those. No, a kiloton is a thousand. Megaton is a million? I don't know. Fucking hell, I'll look it up. I'm so stupid. So, let me see. Megaton is... Shit, we're so bad at this. Grams of TNT. It goes kiloton, megaton, gigaton.

Nice. Okay, so the biggest one ever bombed, ever bombed, ever dropped was the Tsar Bomber. That was the famous Soviet one. That was like 60 megatons, isn't it, that one? That was about 50 to 60 megatons. Jesus.

And that was dropped in like the middle of absolutely fucking nowhere. Yeah, they were just testing it. But what about the little fat man and That was dropped in like the middle of absolutely fucking nowhere. Yeah, they were just testing it. But what about the little fat man and big boy Barry? Big boy and little boy. Big lad and strapping man. Big bouncing boy. Little boy was 15.

15 megatons? 15 kilotons. Oh, so much smaller. Much smaller. So 0.015 megatons. Wow. So 10 Gusko was six of smaller. So 0.015 megatons. Wow. So Tenguska was six of those. Holy crap. Yes.

Well, no, 0.015. So 60 of those. Good God. So 60 of the bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima. Yeah, so huge bomb. Massive. Huge. I mean, it would have absolutely devastated any population centre, right? Yeah. And I guess it did. I mean, I guess it destroyed like a very large area, right?

Yeah, it was massive. I mean, it was a vast area. 80 million trees over 2,000 square kilometres. Yeah, crazy. Up to three people may have died. Gosh, what a disaster. In that. That's fucking unlucky.

You're in the middle of siberia thinking there's no way anything bad's gonna happen here i'm just gonna stay warm and then a fucking space throws a rock at you the equivalent to 60 hiroshima bombs you're like what are the fucking chances like yeah yeah um so people think it was a gigantic meteororoid about the size of, well, not that big, 65 meters across. Doesn't need to be that big. It's going that fast. It's atmosphere.

I mean, think of it. You're traveling at ridiculous speeds out there in space. All of a sudden, you're in atmosphere. It's like that XKCD comic about what would happen if a picture threw a baseball at the speed of light. Did you see that one? That's quite a good one. I think David Wells from the Toronto Blue Jays did that one time.

During the World Series 1992. Damn, what a pitcher. But either way, look it up. Basically, because the ball's traveling at the speed of light in atmosphere, it causes like this expanding shockwave of plasma and annihilates everything for miles around. It's a funny comic. It's worth reading. So you've got something travelling at, I don't know how fast it'd be travelling, maybe 20,000 kilometres an hour or something stupid like

that. Very fucking fast. You hit the atmosphere. Something that big. It's like firing a bullet at the Earth, but the bullet is the size of the moon. You know, fucking scary. It's amazing, thinking about this sort of physics stuff like um you know like it's energy and and like like there was some right i watched this video about rail guns being tested um and they're like they're so powerful yeah they like they fuck up the the actual gun yeah gun can like fire like eight times

before it's fucked or something. Yeah, that's what's preventing them being viable. It's not that it doesn't do insane damage and is super accurate and amazing. The problem is it breaks the gun to shoot it. When you shoot an actual, just a regular rifle or whatever, there's wear and tear on it because as the round travels through the barrel, it's eating away at the barrel and all the components, and it's all very gradually going to wear down. And even if you keep it clean, eventually the gun's just going to, literally going to break through wear and tear. But the railgun is so powerful that it just, you can't even fire it like a dozen times before it just breaks apart because it's so violent.

Really good in Helldivers. In general chat, I posted a couple of pictures of David Wells. Look at David Wells. What a fucking man. I know. If anyone's going to pitch one at the speed of light, this guy would have done it. It's Welles-y. The fucking power behind that.

This guy's got a hell of a gut on him. Well, it's, you know, he's got a hell of an arm on him too. You wouldn't want to get in the way of that. It'd be like getting shot. The gun. I mean, let me look up Big Sexy, which is my Bartolo Colon, my favourite baseball player ever. I'll copy a picture of Bartolo Colon.

This lad was a big fucking lad. Let me see if I can paste this here. I can't just Google Big Sexy. You can. You can, absolutely. Look at it. Look at this lad. Oh yeah, look at the size of it. Oh, this lad's great.

He's a unit. So, he played for the Mets. He was a tremendous pitcher. And there's... He hit a home run in a game. This is when pitchers used to actually bat. He hit a home run and everybody goes fucking nuts. People would come to the games with giant Bartolo Colon cutout heads and stuff like that. He was a legend, he was a legend. I think he was a reliever, but everybody loved him. Back in the day, I used to really like Jose Canseco, but I think he's been cancelled since. Oh really? I'm pretty sure he has been, yeah.

Oh my God. I wonder if he's like Kai Walker, another enemy of the podcast. Ah, performance enhancing drugs no i don't think i don't think we have any specific beef with jose canseco i just remember hearing recently that he was cancelled um oh he so he was arrested for beating his wife in 1997 but back in 1997 that was no big deal no Now, fast forward to the 21st century, we realize that maybe that is a big deal. In his younger years, he almost looked like Hasselhoff-esque, didn't he? He did have a bit of a Hoff.

A little Hoff about him. Hoff about him, yeah. Yeah, a bit of Hoff. And what about other baseball greats? Daryl Strawberry. Daryl Strawberry. What a legend. Also played for the Mets.

Also played for the Mets. Also played for the Mets. Pete Rose. You remember Pete Rose? I think he did a lot of cocaine. Pete Rose went nuts. He went nuts. I used to have a Pete Rose hologram sticker in my Panini Major League Baseball sticker book when I was about seven years old. I had Pete Rose.

I had Daryl Strawberry up in there. Jose Canseco. I remember really liking baseball at the time when I was younger. Some good baseballers that I used to really like the Toronto Blue Jays. And they had an all-star team for a couple of years. They won a couple of World Series back to back. They had a great team and it was really exciting. The Blue Jays, Toronto Blue Jays.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Like Kelly Gruber and Joe Carter and a bunch of other greats at the time. And it was great. I remember everybody loved it. Like I went out to visit my grandparents for the summer and the World Series was on and they were loving it. Man, that was crazy.

We were having like hot dogs every night for dinner and stuff. Man, good times. Yeah, I love baseball. Baseball hot dogs. Love baseball. Take me out to the ball game. Well, got to get the wieners. Take me out to- Go on.

Do you want some news? Yeah. It's sports news. Oh. Famous and celebrated French footballer, Hugo Cloris. Yeah. Cloris. Hugo Lloris.

Left. Is it L-L-O-R-I-S? It is. Yes, yes, yes. He was Spurs goalkeeper for fucking 10 years or whatever. He.

Cloris. Hugo Lloris is how it was pronounced. I thought it was Welsh. No. Hugo. Ohis is how it was pronounced. I thought it was Welsh. No. Hugo. Oh, that's funny. Oh my God, man.

Hugo Lloris, yeah? He's now playing for Los Angeles Football Club. Yeah. Okay, yeah. He's probably winding down now. I think that's Beckham's team. I think that's where they go, to wind down? According to him, he said the reason he moved to LA was because he liked GTA and he wanted to head out. Are you fucking kidding me?

To California. So he wants to do the driving around San Andreas IRL. I wonder if he's going to get the soundtrack from GTA. He wants to listen to some late night hype while he's cruising around. Why not? That's amazing. Totally understandable, really. GTA 5 really does promote that West Coast lifestyle.

It has an insane soundtrack, yeah. I want to go to LA and start a gang, and perhaps me and CJ will get back at it again, eh? Okay. Thank you, Hugo. me and CJ will get back at it again you know thank you Hugo in non-sports news in pop culture news Durex condoms

never used them the owner of them you used Trojans right? no I just never used anything because I've got fucking a million kids so that was the reference you don't need to anymore P-flex no flex doesn't need to yeah you're right i didn't say i haven't used a condom in fucking god 30 years probably whatever i can't remember when the last

one was that's that's a that's a that's a pretty good you remember that episode of curb when he puts the uh the the the condom with like the numbing stuff on the wrong way and Cheryl's vagina goes like all numb for it. Oh man. I don't think I'll use one this century, Johnny. I'll be honest. I used one back in the day when we were, you know, we were still young. But then Mrs. F was on the pill like I think. A lot of women in long-term relationships, it's just much easier, isn't it? like I think a lot of women in long term relationships it's just much easier isn't it so apparently it's quite difficult

it's using so it's using live streaming to sell condoms live streaming a Johnny I'm not quite sure what this news article

is that doesn't make any fucking sense mate what are you talking about live streaming a Johnny live streaming a bloody Johnny

mate what are you talking about oh man I don't know what this article is Live streaming with Johnny? Live streaming with bloody Johnny, mate. What are you talking about? Oh, man. I don't know what this article is. I'm not reading any more of that. Next. Tom, cut that.

Tom, cut that. Destiny and Halo composer, someone O'Donnell, Marty O'Donnell, is running for a Republican House seat. A congressional seat. Right. A congressional seat. Right. Video game composer, Destiny and Halo composer, Marty O'Donnell. If you like video games, you like Republican. If you hate abortion, you should check him out. Vote Marty O'Donnell.

Gosh. Marty O'Donnell. It's crazy. He has described himself as a boomer and a federalist. He found himself yelling at the news. If you find yourself yelling at the news- I feel like if you find yourself yelling at the news, you are not an ideal candidate for politics.

I don't think anybody wants you to be in politics. Maybe book yourself a little trip to the Canary Islands. Yeah. Maybe go and find something to do where you can get a grip on your life, where you're not yelling at a television like a psycho. And please do not enter the political arena because there's already enough psychotic people there and we just don't need any more. What we need now, I think, is just some sensible people in politics. So, if you find yourself screaming at your TV, go find something else to do. Do us all a favour.

Amen. Preach. Hey, I got, not news, but I've got a bit of old news. I just saw this post on Reddit the other day. Sorry, this morning. Do you want to hear this? Yeah, I'd love to hear it. The London Calcutta bus service? Is this a disaster that's been forgotten? Not a disaster.

Is this a Wes Anderson movie? This is not a Wes Anderson movie either. Oh. This was a bus service that ran from London to Calcutta, which is now called Kolkata. Right. It was the longest bus route in the world. Started in 1957. It went to India via Belgium and not just Belgium.

It says here via Belgium, Yugoslavia, and northwestern India, but passed through a fair few countries other than those three. Right. It's the hippie trail, right? The hippie route, yeah. It took 50 days to get to Calcutta from London. Voyage was over 10,000 miles one way, 20,300 miles round trip, and it cost 85 quid in 1957, which included food, travel, and accommodation.

The facilities on the bus, it had reading facilities, separate sleeping bunks for all passengers, fan-operated heaters, and a kitchen. Forward observation lounge on the upper deck was more like a tour. You didn't just get on the bus and fucking settle down. It was like a proper trip. There was a radio and music system

for parties on the bus. There's some teenagers in the back. Yeah. And you could, it stopped for shopping, and it would spend time at tourist bus. There's some teenagers at the back. Yeah. And you could- It stopped for shopping and it would spend time at tourist destinations. It sounds fucking amazing. It's like a cruise, but in a bus. Yeah. There's a show on Channel 4

about going on a bus trip. Maybe it's a bit like that. You know, what is it called? What's it called? It's not four on a bus. I think it's four in a bed. That's the- That's like the bed and breakfast- Is it called coach trip? Coach trip, I think is the one in a Bed. That's the, that's like the Bed and Breakfast one.

Is it called Coach Trip? Coach Trip, I think is the one, yeah. Yeah. There's a show that Mrs. F watches which is like a competition. People have to get from A to B as fast as possible, but they can't like use planes. Have you seen this? They're given a certain amount of money, it's like they go in pairs, they just have to go, right, you've got to go from London to LA, but the long way around and you've got 30 days to do it. Oh yeah, around the world. There's loads of those.

There's one on the BBC that's quite good, actually. That's the one Mrs. F likes. It's really good. I've watched all the series of it. Is it called Amazing Quest or something? No, it's called The Amazing Race. Amazing Race. There was one, they did one recently where it was through Canada, but again, like through all the remote bits and stuff, you know, like they were ending up in places where, you know, a train would only run out of there on a Thursday at like six in the morning.

And that was it. And if you miss that, you were stuck there and you would probably lose the race and stuff. They have a budget. then uh so they have to like they can take any means to get to where they need to go but they have to visit these places because they have to sort of check in they're like checkpoints right so that you know you can't just go from like uh vancouver straight to calgary because it's too easy you have to go from like vancouver up to um you know fucking fort wayne which is like in the middle of goddamn nowhere you know some shit like that that's where the checkpoint is so you have to check into all these checkpoints and ideally you get there first

you have to like circumnavigate the globe and if you and however however much time you get to the checkpoint before everyone else is how much time you have as a head start for the next one so it's a place so you get to the checkpoint and then it's a nice hotel they get to wash rest whatever because when they're traveling for days or weeks at a time to get to the checkpoints they're on such a small budget they're just like eating bread on a bus and sleeping on a bus and sleeping in hostels and um kind of depending on people's goodwill you know like they can stop sometimes they'll stop at like a egg farm and they'll be like okay well clean out the chickens all day and uh we'll cook you a meal and you can sleep here and they're always like okay yeah great because they can save money doing that or whatever but it's it's it's

really good it's really well done and and the the people that they get are interesting as well of the amazing race us there have been 20 20. More. 36. 36? 36. Okay, I've never watched the American one, but the UK one is pretty good. I like it. Huh. Oh, wait, wait. Just a last thing that I can think of this week.

And then, I mean, this has been an hour and 15. Let's see if, like, let's all have our last point. Otherwise, we're going to be here all day. I've got to go shopping. So, the Cerveza Cristal memes, have you seen these? Cerveza Cristal memes? So, in 2003, they aired the original Star Wars movie in Chile. They didn't want

to have ad breaks, so they had product placement in the film. They edited product placement in the film. So, if you look these up, if anyone listened to this, if you haven't heard it, Cerveza Cristal, look it up. Obi-Wan, in the scene where he goes, your father was the greatest star pilot in the galaxy. And he reaches into a box to get his lightsaber. And then they cut to a guy's hand with a robe, kind of like Obi-Wan's, reaching into an ice box to grab a beer.

And it plays the music, Cerveza Cristal. And the logo comes middle of the screen and then it cuts back to the movie like it's carrying on like normal it is amazing look it up they won an award this won an award for most innovative advertising oh god fuck oh that's good it's amazing that's good um i'm uh i'm currently monitoring the Epic Games public status for the Fortnite services to come online because I'm under strict instructions from my son. There's a new season of Fortnite starting today. And he said, Dad, I've saved up all my V-Bucks for the Battle Pass.

And can you please update the game so that when I get home from school, I don't have to sit there for an hour updating the game. Because all his mates are going to want to fucking play it right away. Yeah. So I'm going to get it all ready for him hour updating the game. Because all his mates are going to want to fucking play it right away. Yeah, so I'm going to get it all ready for him. God bless him. He's gaming. Man, he's loving it. Lad's a gamer. Let's fucking go.

Get him into dopes. We need some good young British players coming through. Actually, don't do that. You've ruined his life. Lulu, you're last. Last from Lulu. Sorry, I'm eating an oat bar. Yeah, there we go. He's eating an oat bar. Live, laugh, love. Last from Lulu. Sorry, I'm eating an oat bar. Yeah, there we go. He's eating an oat bar. Live, laugh, love.

We'll see you next time, everyone. That concludes our podcast. God bless. We love you. We love you. See you. See you. Bye. Bye.