Triforce! - Triforce! #99.7: Good Day to Break Bad

Episode Date: July 3, 2019

Triforce! Episode 99.7! Pyrion wants to break bad, Sips wants some corruption in politics and Lewis has been on a grammar spree with Bodega! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.l...y/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:18 with that. Yeah. Welcome to 99.7. Oh, shit. Sorry. Welcome back welcome back everyone to Triforce oh that's right we did 99.7 coming at you on your dial that's right with me Sips oh how you doing Sips? Wait you're Sips? Oh hey.
Starting point is 00:01:40 And there was a comma. Pflax. Oh there was a comma. It's an old joke but it still holds up. Last week, Sips Fixed his computer. You called me an old joke. Yeah. You said in P-flax, it's an old joke, but it still holds up.
Starting point is 00:01:51 Like, I'm old. I don't consider myself a joke, and I definitely don't hold up if I am. You're an egg. You're a lovely egg. An egg. Thank you. A lovely egg. You can't hold it up any longer.
Starting point is 00:02:03 Your body is betraying you at the tender age of how old are you again 53 53 wow coming up today sips tells the story about a plug yeah i got a new i've got a new plug story for you guys actually um if you dare no i dare to hear it oh we'll save that for later sips this right in case we need like in case the podcast let's not blow our load early we don't want to blow our load too early right we got to build to that right exactly so i i read it i read a story of the news okay just now vice did an investigation they went around a bunch of the mps offices right in parliament and they got cocaine swabs and they went to the toilets and swabbed the surfaces in
Starting point is 00:02:45 the toilets to see if there was any cocaine and there was traces in four out of the nine bathrooms they tested there was cocaine right now i got a few questions first of all i'm guessing it's probably not the mps it's like all the overworked interns and shit working for them that are just doing coke all the time because they're fucking bored and i you know i don't know maybe they're rich or whatever but i'm thinking how the fuck are all these people getting coke i've never seen drug dealers selling coke in twickenham i don't know how to get in touch with a drug dealer my question is it's the original gamer fuel do you know i mean it's like before monster energy yeah yeah before yeah before mountain dew and monster energy and like uh what's that what's that coffee one that everybody um sponsors on twitch like
Starting point is 00:03:25 madrinos or something coffee i've not heard of it i have no idea i i'm i'm totally out of that's like a that's like a gamer fuel we could market cocaine the original gamer fuel coke try it well wait no but i thought that i thought that the original like uh gamer fuel was uh was speed remember michael j fox and family family ties did speed. Remember Michael J. Fox and Family Ties did speed and he was losing his hair and stuff. He was worried about it. He was cramming for exams and then his hair was falling out and it was because he was doing speed. I think coke is, I mean, I'm sure people do take speed. I know they do. Like methamphetamine is what speed is, right? So crystal meth is crystal it's speed as a as a
Starting point is 00:04:05 crystal and i assume it probably has some other sort of effects beyond just amphetamine but cocaine is more i think it's more of a party drug especially for the wealthy rather than speed which is like the poor man's coke it is a kind of classy like upper class drug so oh me and tar queen are just popping down in the land road to get some cocaine from Johnny. Johnny's got a good stash. Just got it on a boat. He brings it in from Peru.
Starting point is 00:04:34 Come on, one up your nose. All night long. I've never done coke, but I'd always wanted to because i'd feel i i'd like to see what it was like but i'd be worried it would be moreish you know and it would be uh it'd be something that i'd uh want to do more often yeah i'm happy with cider ciders and wine serve me well like i'm cool with those i don't feel like i need an additional jolt but my
Starting point is 00:05:01 dad uh told me that coke is actually really really fun like he said the first few times you take it it's amazing and it fires up all the neurons in your brain and everything and it's crazy so meaning he'd taken it it was the 80s like rockets yeah they don't come back like your brain is like like this but he said the problem is it like burns them out and as you take more and more you have to take more and more to get the same effect and eventually you're just snorting coke and it's not having anywhere near the same effect so i thought so what you're telling me is if i did it once it would be really cool and exciting and then i as long as i stopped there i basically had the best coke experience i'm ever gonna have so why continue
Starting point is 00:05:35 yeah well i think it's like um i've i don't know if you guys have ever played brim world before but you know you do if you do a lot of drugs in that game you develop a tolerance and then there's net you can never do too much i mean you overdose sometimes don't get me wrong but like you you never get the same high and then what happens real life what happens is that you you just develop side effects like lung cancer and like cirrhosis yeah you can get in your kidneys and liver taking drugs man yeah who knew like first of all it can fuck you up bad loads of people not loads but i hear about it seemingly quite often maybe it's because i follow the kind of people who do this but they go off into the jungle right right and they have one of these like and they go into the and they have like
Starting point is 00:06:21 ayahuasca or something like that like some kind of really crazy psychedelic thing experience in the jungle and they always come back changed like man changed my life yeah yeah i don't look at anything the same way anymore and i'm both at the same time terrified but also kind of excited by this because like it like like for those for certain people i've watched a few celebrities who've really struggled with like major depression and they've been like you know i was absolutely gonna kill myself i was sure of it and then i went and just spent a week shitting my pants in the jungle because i had terrible diarrhea but also did shit loads of crazy fucking drugs with some natives right you know literally literally sat on a fucking log in like a pair of straw pants around a campfire with loads of guys who fucking have got like like like a tree log tree branch like through their nose you know and like two massive hooped
Starting point is 00:07:11 earrings and they got like this really saggy face you know and they're all like sunburned they got tattoos all over them and they're like semi-naked and it's fucking you're breathing the smoke you're like thousand miles from anywhere and you're eating like caterpillars and you're breathing the smoke and you're up like a thousand miles from anywhere and you're eating like caterpillars and you're fucking grinding up something off the back of a frog and fucking licking it and just going crazy and then you have all these fucking
Starting point is 00:07:31 crazy psychedelic dreams. That's it. I can't imagine how bad it is. Lewis has just described Yonkon to you guys. I wonder if part of it is this life-changing experiences that you have such a miserable time
Starting point is 00:07:44 on your awakening journey. You think, you know what? My life-changing experiences that you have such a miserable time on your awakening journey you think you know what my life is actually not that fucking bad these guys have branches through their eyes are they like fucking so glad they're not led hot like completely dead they're like that sucked so much i'm actually never been happier to be yeah a rich tech in a comfortable like warm bed with like netflix on my ipad i think i think another one that would be good for that would be a situation similar to if not exactly the same as uh the game with michael douglas in it right now turns out in the end it was all just like a a hoax just remind me what happened in the game that movie's so stupid for those of us who aren't 45 years old sips what
Starting point is 00:08:25 happened in michael douglas this movie well it was just like a normal guy you know just with a normal life he had a wife and stuff and then all of a sudden his life just started to go absolutely nuts like there was all of a sudden there was assassins after him trying to kill him this is not the summary of the actual film his wife was he's estranged from his ex-wife and his younger brother and he's a wealthy investment banker yeah he's his father commits suicide and he's haunted by that for his birthday his friend his brother gets him a gift for the game like a voucher offered by a company called consumer recreation services yeah and his brother says it'll change your life and
Starting point is 00:09:05 that's when the game kicks off yeah and uh and it all goes nuts so the the setup there was a little is that a metaphor for cocaine maybe there's all sorts of stuff that happened where he thought is this still the game or has my life become so shit and i'm fighting for my life all the time now he couldn't tell but then in the end they were like haha don't worry about it man it was just the game and then he was like oh phew and then he appreciated his life more after that yeah oh i love i love putting f on the end of few phew phew phew yeah all right do you want to know what happens this is the the end of the movie he's running away for his life there's troops after him the crs troops and all the rest of it he's lost all his money and you know he's gone his life is over i remember this
Starting point is 00:09:49 movie i saw this in the in the theater because it was like else whatever we watched anything in those days so here's a summary of the ending he goes to the jungle he takes a load of ayahuasca he shits his pants for two weeks in a in a fucking yeah this is more interesting realizes that actually all of the shit that he was dealing with was trivial compared to this wanky horrible diarrhea soaked soaking wet horrible fucking drug-addled
Starting point is 00:10:13 nonsense experience. Someone edit the Wikipedia page for the game brackets 1997 film to that and we'll see how long it stays up. Don't vandalize Wikipedia. Fuck him. Do it sorry it's the fucking wiki for the game yeah nobody gives a shit average viewership of that page zero over the past 30 years what's gonna happen though what's gonna happen is people will be listening
Starting point is 00:10:36 to this podcast sip's gonna mention the game they're gonna pause the podcast look it up on wikipedia and be like what the fuck is this now The game is one of the few movies that I've watched in my life where I got to the end of it and I thought to myself, I will never get that time back. I will never get that money back. Now, first of all, that was a David Fincher film, a good director. And this was one of his movies. I know, but it still sucked really bad. It was the terrible one.
Starting point is 00:11:03 Here's why it sucked. Here's why it really sucked. 20 years later, you got your value back with a fucking anecdote on this podcast, Sips. Yeah, yeah. I'll make the money back at least
Starting point is 00:11:12 if somebody buys a fucking jug. So finally, you've converted that shitty movie into a cold hard cash. It'll have been worth it. Patreon. Listen, because this is where the film gets really stupid.
Starting point is 00:11:23 It's stupid all the way through, but then at the end, the troops are closing in he's got a gun he he shoots his brother when his brother comes through the door on the roof with a bottle of champagne and he's so devastated he throws himself off the roof okay just like his dad did and he throws himself off the roof and lands miraculously on a giant airbag all right and he finds that the whole room is full of his family and friends everyone tell him it was just a game and i i remember seeing that and thinking what if he jumped 10 feet over to the left but he lands bang in the middle of this airbag it was all this ridiculous setup i hated it the ending was so stupid the whole movie
Starting point is 00:12:00 was stupid but that ending absolutely drove me up the fucking wall yeah like a derren brown thing i'm still not over it after all this time it's awful have you seen those deron brown things where he tries to convince a guy to i don't know suck his dick this is deron brown's suck my dick that's right this is the series where I'm trying to get a man To suck my dick I've got 500 guests coming to my show And by the end of it One of them
Starting point is 00:12:33 Will have wrapped their lips around my dick We set the scene of sucking my dick In the minds of the contestants By bombarding them with images of them Photoshopped sucking my dick. Man, I would go see that. I would go see that. He should totally do a show where he gets 500 people to suck his dick. No, I wouldn't. I've got tremendous willpower. His magic will not work on me.
Starting point is 00:13:01 You think you do, Sips, but it'll trick you. You won't even realize you're doing it. No, I'm not. I'm untrickable. This is a lovely magnum I'm eating. And, you know, actually, turns out, wasn't it? Yeah, you look up, and there's Darren Brown. And he's holding the magnum. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:15 And you've got his dick in your mouth. Telling you to stroke the balls and work the shaft. Can you imagine? I would watch that. If he had, like, I'm whittling down the contestants to the people I think will be convinced to suck my dick. More after the break. And then he just comes back and there's a guy on his knees going to town on Darren's cock.
Starting point is 00:13:32 Man, that would be an awesome porn. It would be incredible. I would watch that one. No, because I want to know that this person, like afterwards they always chat to them. I couldn't believe it when I sort of came around and Darren Brown's cock was in my mouth. Fair play to him. I couldn't believe it when I sort of came round and Darren Brown's cock was in my mouth. Fair play to him.
Starting point is 00:13:47 He totally got me. He's a genius, isn't he? I had no idea I was doing it. But yeah, it has obviously devastated me emotionally. But yeah, it was worth it. Great show. Really fantastic. He's the best.
Starting point is 00:13:57 A year later, he's like in the jungle, like doing ayahuasca. Trying to fucking... Jesus. Certainly one of the tribes people removes a mask. It's Darren Brown brown round two so uh first of all like about cocaine on toilets i'm this has been going on for years right like is uh is a toilet uh a popular spot to do cocaine on yeah it is right okay what not not on the toilet but on the surfaces so near the mirrors and all the rest of it there's like
Starting point is 00:14:24 a little shelf you do it there or in the toilet because you can the surfaces, so near the mirrors and all the rest of it. Sure. There's like a little shelf. You do it there or in the toilet because you can close it. Where else can you find privacy in public? In the toilet. Oh, I thought you meant on the actual toilet. No, no, no. Right, okay. Do you have to do it off surfaces? I mean, why can't you just put it on a little bit of it on your finger or something?
Starting point is 00:14:37 Is it just... You can do that for sure. But if you're doing a big line, you want something nice and flat. And if you put it on your hand, then you've got cocaine on your hand. You just take a little bit out of the little white envelope. This is, I only know this because I've seen it in movies, obviously. I've never done it. Like I said, I really want to.
Starting point is 00:14:52 But they take it out of the envelope. Yeah, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. Yeah, tap it out. And then you put it on and then they go, oh man. Okay, Tony, let's get out there. We got a business deal. Woo! And they go out and do their business deal.
Starting point is 00:15:02 That's right, you're right. Matthew McConaughey. I think I've seen him do it like hundreds of times. What about when they just put a little tiny bit on like their pinky finger and snort it off of there? Oh, yeah. That's just a pick-me-up. That's not a full line. You just do a little.
Starting point is 00:15:15 Yeah, just a little tiny one. So you can have a little quick business deal. You just need 15 minutes of Coke. You don't need a full buzz. What about where you put it up your gums? Like up your top lip. Yeah, they do. I don't know why they always do that in the you put it up your in your gums like up your top tip top lip yeah they do
Starting point is 00:15:26 I don't know why they always do that in the movies I think that's the bit left over they rub it on their gums no that's just to test it to see if it's good cocaine
Starting point is 00:15:33 like when they're about to buy it no no they do it sometimes after they've snorted it like they sort it off the thing and then there's a bit on their finger and they rub it on their gums I don't know why
Starting point is 00:15:38 maybe it makes your teeth feel amazing maybe you can't taste it yeah I think it's like it probably stimulates your proto-neuronic um membranol correct doctor good diagnosis i know that there are people that have injected
Starting point is 00:15:54 into their dick before yeah i've heard about that i heard and they get like a boner that doesn't go away like what about like uh like those secret heroin users that like inject into their feet and stuff so that they can't i i don't know if that's for secret because they burnt out the veins in their arms and legs i always thought that they did it because you you're not likely to look at somebody's feet when you're you know like you could see somebody's arm anytime and be like oh crap what do they call it track marks yeah it's got train tracks all up the thing is the uh the chemical going into your vein as often as they do it wears out the vein to the point where, I mean, that's why they have circulation problems. You see a lot of older addicts missing fingers and toes and eventually feet and hands because their circulation, they fuck it by destroying their veins.
Starting point is 00:16:38 This is grim topic for a trifle. Well, I felt like this is one of the strongest ones we've done in a while. I'm actually enjoying this one. whereas the past 20 or so. I feel like we have to counterbalance your pro-cocaine attitude with some anti-drug propaganda. Don't do drugs. Don't do drugs. So now that weed is decriminalized and being legalized in a lot of places,
Starting point is 00:17:04 what's going gonna be next because now that every like my friend in toronto said he goes out at lunchtime and everybody's just smoking doobies out there now yeah it's just like so common for people to just the same way you maybe go have a pint at lunch or whatever people are just outside just smoking doobs and whatever and i i don't mind i'm okay with it i don't i don't actually think it's dangerous or anything but i i just know what people are like and i know that everybody is going to be clamoring around looking for the next thing right to legalize because now that they can just get weed and do a lot of weed or whatever
Starting point is 00:17:40 they're going to be looking for something else, right? They're going to be like, I need something better. I need something to give me more of a kick. Did you ever read Brave New World? It was like a sci-fi book from the 30s or 40s. It was long, very old. Soma. I think it was the 50s. But yeah, Soma was the drug that they gave to people. There was a government-issued drug called Soma. Basically, it was the idea that it was supposed to be a kind of chill a chill out thing that would just the opiate for the masses yeah yeah it would kind of just like keep keep people calm keep people relaxed like you don't see people on weed getting into fights or
Starting point is 00:18:16 like you know i do know in the same way that alcohol kind of makes you yeah yeah rowdy so so for example walking in yesterday i was walking walking through the fountain area in Bristol, which is, like, kind of a nice central area. There's usually, like, people in the evenings, like, hanging out there playing music and stuff. It's very cosmopolitan. Yeah. It's, like, quiet, chill.
Starting point is 00:18:33 And there was, like, this big police cordon around the whole thing. Yeah. And there was loads of, like, big, like, blood pools on the ground. And there were loads of police, like, hanging around and stuff, like, doing some crime scene investigation. And I looked it up. And, basically, it was, like, three guys. There was a wounding. Okay. and there are loads of police hanging around and stuff doing some crime scene investigation.
Starting point is 00:18:47 And I looked it up and basically it was like three guys, there was a wounding. So that's what it says. Three guys were taken to hospital. It's called a wounding. But I guess it was like a stabbing or whatever. But some guys had obviously got into a fight at four in the morning, drunk, and gone and stabbed each other and stuff. I know it's not it's not the same sort of culture as
Starting point is 00:19:09 people staying at home eating loads of chocolate cookies and like binging lord of the rings you know for the 15th time you know it's not kind of it's not the same no it's more of a it's more of a um whereas when you're when you're drunk and you're stabbing somebody it's a very physical act that traumatizes somebody but when you stay at home and eat cookies and ice cream and watch lord of the rings and then when you're done all that and you go and start posting on an online forum that's more of like a mental and psychological assault on people and it's it does the same amount of damage really it just it's not as tangible i don't think so with cocaine though i mean you could see how it would be you know these high-powered bankers and guys in in like kind of the government might think it's a good thing to kind of keep awake or go
Starting point is 00:20:00 through the spreadsheets or sort something out or like but honestly like you think like they'd just be coming up with loads of terrible ideas i guess anything like uh i i'm very scared for example um fall into a hang on let me see i don't know why i found that funny sorry i wanted to get this out i'm very scared to like drink or or do any um like like do any smokity weed or anything before I do any recording or stuff or streams, right? What if you accidentally get your dick out or something and then you get banned? That's not what I'm concerned about so much.
Starting point is 00:20:35 Oh, right, okay. I'm more concerned that... That's my number one, actually. I'm more concerned that I won't be able to do it without it or I'll be scared to... Oh, you've like a long thing, a long game in mind. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:47 I like, I don't mind like drinking on, on, on when I'm doing stuff casually, but I don't want to like make it a thing that's required. Do you see what I mean? Like in order to like, like if you're drinking to fall asleep,
Starting point is 00:20:58 do you know what I mean? Or if you're like, you know, taking a pill to fall asleep, it can very quickly become a thing that you have to do. Yeah. You rely on it. And I think a lot of people who become addicted to things start that way it becomes they it becomes habitual through necessity or or well that's this opiate or what they think is in
Starting point is 00:21:17 america isn't it is necessary you know loads of people got got uh no no loads of people got prescribed them for pain this is my understanding of it. I've read about it. And it was things like doctors in America are very, very quick to prescribe quite strong painkillers. Yeah. For things that are fairly mild. Like over here, the NHS would say, take some ibuprofen and some paracetamol. Whereas in America, obviously, you've got, if you're a doctor, you want to give people the level of treatment where they think oh man that doctor was amazing because yeah you're high as fuck on opiates of course you're
Starting point is 00:21:47 gonna think your doctor's amazing you're gonna go back there yeah so so exactly they give you these opiates the prescription runs out they're like you don't need them anymore but you're like hmm but now i'm addicted to opiates so now i'm gonna be a fucking heroin addict or whatever yeah and that's like one of the problems that they've had is people who were previously on prescriptions i'm not going to say legitimate prescriptions because I don't think most people need opiate-level painkillers for back pain. That needs to be so fucking serious for that to happen. It's like an Indian takeaway, right?
Starting point is 00:22:14 If you go to an Indian takeaway, they're not going to make it healthy. They're going to put double cream in there and all the fatty stuff and butter sauce. It's going to be fucking delicious because they're going to want you to come back and have it again. There's no incentive for them.
Starting point is 00:22:27 And when that Indian takeaway closes down and you're still hankering for some double cream, you're sucking on a cow. You're going to find a cow in a field and suck the cream right out. You're going to try the Sainsbury's fucking low calorie one. It tastes like shit.
Starting point is 00:22:38 You know, it's never going to be as good. And that's just the downward spiral. And you know you fit rock bottom when you wake up and you can't remember what you did last night but darren brown's dick is in your mouth exactly you're licking a fucking frog you're licking darren brown's dick so i i so this week right okay last week we did um we did a stream a triforce uh live stream which which which period backed out because we were playing path of exile right now we're probably going to stop this this stream of future because i want to i i'm it doesn't work right because we're all too different i want to play like very different
Starting point is 00:23:16 things to what pflex and six want to play i know i can't i i i understand flax i under i understand flax's uh involvement in this uh and his his gaming habits i understand the i don't understand yours at all though no i don't know what you play or what you want to play or anything i'm i'm weird but anyways we last week we played path of exile and uh sips um and i i quit playing that type of game before because it kind of the flashing lights and the repetitive just of it made me feel a bit sick. But I've really got, it's got its claws into me this week. Have you been playing it?
Starting point is 00:23:50 A week. And to the point where I actually have, like, I've hurt myself. Like, I feel like my hands are sore. Really? And I don't know whether it's just muscle pain from working out, like, the amount of clicking and button pressing and spamming i've been playing baby or something i've played it like a ton this week it's fine exactly maybe i'm not used to it maybe i'm not used to playing like maybe it's just my hands
Starting point is 00:24:15 are like i feel like an old old arthritic man currently with like hey you're talking to an old arthritic man and if i went to the doctor in Britain, he'd be like, fucking piss off, you idiot. Get out. Whereas if I went to the doctor in America, they'd be like, this is the strongest shit we've got, mate. Yeah, this will fucking suck you right out. And they'd be like, this is the double cocoa, dynamol, double cocaine-filled, paracetamol,
Starting point is 00:24:42 aspirin-loaded it's got coated in fucking extra pain killing juice nice what that's what they give you they give you all the doctors in America
Starting point is 00:24:51 are East End villains apparently well you didn't dare do your American accent which I quite like you hear about this a bit oh man
Starting point is 00:25:00 Lewis American accent you're some country doctor hell I've been your family doctor for now 50 years now. Yeah, that's the thing. If you're in Britain and the bad guy is American, he almost always exclusively is like from the bayou and has like overalls on with no shirt underneath
Starting point is 00:25:20 and is trying to molest you or something. That's the typical's the deliver typical american bad guy but then if you're american the typical british bad guy is eccentric and wearing a top hat and a monocle and is is into weird typical cocaine user probably drugs so but like we i get mean like the hollywood doctor do you mean whenever anyone like i think i saw this week that um patrick stewart was talking about how he has his hollywood doctor whatever and when i was in hollywood i went to my doctor there and he said i should try some of this weed stuff and uh well blow behold before i knew it i loved the stuff and i was watching
Starting point is 00:26:03 lord of the rings all bloody night watching watching my friend and having some ice cream and then posting online about it. Do you know what I mean? Like, he was like, do you know what I mean? That Hollywood doctor kind of thing is very different to... Yeah, they'll give you whatever you want. They're basically dealers. They are basically dealers, yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:20 I suppose it's like the equivalent of a private doctor here, but I mean, I've never really seen... At that point in your life, though, your issues are so complex, you kind of need somebody like that who will just give you some wild and outlandish drug that'll just get you right off your tits. If I was Patrick Stewart, Sage, I'd be doing whatever I wanted. He's rich. He's got- he's surrounded- I mean, I bet he could get some young poontang if he wanted. He could just fucking beam it to his house.
Starting point is 00:26:44 Is Patrick Stewart at that level? Really? Dude, it's Patrick Stewart. I know it's Patrick Stewart, but it doesn't strike me as a typical Hollywood rich guy. You know, like I always just figured he was just sort of. Really? Yeah. I don't know why.
Starting point is 00:26:56 It just doesn't have that. I think he's British and chill back. Yeah, I reckon he comes back to Britain and then has his like stays in a little a little country house and reads books in a little annex and he's out there fucking as much young pussy as he can snorting coke off their ass right I guarantee you he's having a whale of a time I'm gonna google this you're gonna you're gonna walk around one alleyway in Twickenham one night and there's gonna be Darren Brown there with his dick out Patrick Stewart's we have some business to settle now suck this man's dick Patrick Stewart's net worth is a is uh estimated at 70 million dollars yeah he was born in 1940
Starting point is 00:27:37 uh and he was born in uh Murfield West Riding. Now, I'm trying to remember what team he's a fan of. Is it Sheffield United or is it Burnley? I can't remember what team he supports. Let me see. He is... Oh, God, there's a lot of info here. Huddersfield, Huddersfield. I don't know how much of this is true, though.
Starting point is 00:28:03 Let's see. Okay, Lewisis brinley oh my god i just found this unbelievable picture of him and ian mckellen this is fucking unbelievable okay always post january 2014 lewis there's a picture of him and ian mckellen i'm gonna link you guys this tweet this is gold chad listen to this lewis allen brinley also known as zeffos is one of the founders of yogscast uh a youtube channel connected to world of warcraft minecraft and other known games his estimated net worth is three million dollars who wow lewis allen brinley not we're not talking about patrick stewart anymore all right let's see let's three million let's see what mine is can you pay off my mortgage this is according to the internet right i can't even find mine i can't even find mine there's no
Starting point is 00:28:52 there's no there's no net worth for me sips is worth like i'm worth nothing twix bars i googled my net worth there's a picture of a guy like a stock photo of a guy with his pockets turned out looking sad period flax net worth. Ted J. Forsyth. Full name being Edward Joseph Forsyth, also known as Period J. Flax. Who said it's Edward Joseph Forsyth? This is on the Yogscast wiki, apparently. I'm so wrong. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:18 My middle name is not Joseph. Your first name is Theodore as well. Edward Joseph. Okay. Big list it is Edward Edward Yosef. According to youtubemoney.com, Period Flax's net worth
Starting point is 00:29:29 in 2019 is zero dollars. I told you. I told you. Oh, wow. Picture of a guy with his pockets turned out, hands up.
Starting point is 00:29:41 My middle name is James. It's not Yosef. That's incredible. Yosef. Yosef. It's not joseph that's incredible joseph it's not even spelled joseph it's joseph j-o-s-e-f oh god that's hilarious you must have made that joke somewhere no i don't think i ever did i don't know where they've got this we do a lot of crap you do all sorts of shit all the time you did a podcast yesterday with someone else i heard you were cheating on us never i did cheat on you i've never said my name is my middle name is joseph well you did another podcast yeah when are we gonna get to hear it he said it was good as
Starting point is 00:30:08 well he said it was it was a fun chat i thought i brought it up just to annoy him yeah it wasn't funny who was it with i don't want to say it hasn't come out yet and i don't know if it's been publicized yet it's not a big deal they might not use it look i was thinking of you guys the whole time did you did you talk about pooping and butts and vaginas a lot? Or did you have to tone it down? It was very different. You talked about cocaine and blowjobs? No, none of this stuff came up.
Starting point is 00:30:33 None of it came up? What were you doing? Who were you talking to? You've got to guide the conversation around to this stuff, P-Flax. You're not an amateur. Yeah. Come on. I don't want to talk about it. All right. Fine. should talk to all of you no i've i've i've read this thing a
Starting point is 00:30:49 long time ago that like some insane statistic of toilets in london have cocaine in them so it doesn't surprise me that like i think you can find trace amounts of anything on anything though as well like because of the way the world works you know small particles of cocaine will spread themselves over the whole fucking toilet over the course of years yeah but it's where they were i mean these were specifically toilets that would have been used then and it's not like they're just in the center of town you think it's like a private toilet yeah they're like around the offices it's not somewhere that people would normally go and do coke you'd go there because you worked there.
Starting point is 00:31:26 You didn't want to get caught doing it in your office so you popped to the bogs and do them in there. That's the point, is it's where they are. I mean, if you were at the Buckingham Palace and you swabbed the toilets in there and coke came up, you wouldn't say, oh, this stuff just gets around, doesn't it? You'd be like, fuck me,
Starting point is 00:31:40 someone that's here is doing coke at Buck Powell. Bournemouth. Bournemouth University. I did not go to Bournemouth University. is this coming from bournemouth university we tested all toilets in the entire bournemouth university every single toilet came back positive for cocaine yeah of course you see these things all the time yeah but i don't know if it means much though like all of the all of every tubes every tube state every tube i mean obviously people are doing cocaine it's not that it's not that um surprising you know what i mean like i i i don't
Starting point is 00:32:11 really get why it's such a big deal that mps have done it and why they feel like they have to talk about and stuff as well like i mean drugs are i i know they're not like an acceptable part of culture per se but most people will come into contact with them at some point in their life right probably probably their young life imagine if imagine if i was lecturing you about the perils of drinking and trying to outlaw drinking whilst holding a can of cider well it's i i get i get that that's the that's the problem is you can't moralize to people and tell them what they can and can't do and say, this must stop whilst doing it yourself. Yeah, but I think you're speaking on behalf of people who can do it responsibly and moderately.
Starting point is 00:32:55 And in doing so, you're trying to help people who aren't doing that, right? Who are becoming hopelessly addicted to it or abusing it or whatever. So what you're saying is, I can handle it and you can't. No, I don't. That's what you're saying. Not between you and me, but that's what they're saying is, look, this isn't for the rest of you because you guys can't handle it, but we can.
Starting point is 00:33:16 So we're going to do it, but we're going to criminalize the rest of you and lock people up for even having it. But we're going to do it anyway. That's the problem that people have is you can't hold a platform. No one in any walk of life can hold a platform where they tell other people that they can't do something while they themselves do it, because that's bullshit. If you're actively doing it, but I think to say,
Starting point is 00:33:35 oh, I did it when I was 15 and I thought you should know, I don't see how that matters at all. Like, I don't see why anybody would care. Is it a bit like, though, right? Is it a little bit like, if you're doing VR't see why anybody would care a bit like though right is it a little bit like if you're doing vr okay let's have a vr headset and you've got like imagine just having sex with some super hentai sexy lady right you've got the full vr kit on right you got the hat you got the dick attachment you got like the fucking boobs virtual boobs like that you feel i don't
Starting point is 00:33:59 know i don't know i don't do it i'm not a I don't know. I'm sure there's all this weird shit out there. Sounds like you do it, honestly. That's like the same as, okay, an MP doing cocaine. They have all of the lovely accoutrement and it's all beautiful. It's not the same if I was in a dirty fucking homeless alley with Darren Brown there at the other end going, whoa, how you doing? Am I getting into your head yet, mate? And I've got my vr headset it's like not the time do you know i mean it's not the time to do that it's not it's not the same i can't be
Starting point is 00:34:29 like oh i want to have sex with a sexy japanese oh senpai san luis oh this analogy you've lost me like really completely lost don't get me wrong i do have a boner but i don't know what you're talking about he's guilty about it i guess what i'm trying to say when when it leaks out that i've been doing this stuff don't judge that they are they're in their circumstance they're able to do it properly and and do you know i mean that that somehow they're deluded into thinking that that that what the what that they can have so this is always the case in every single like thing like you hear about old kim jong-un or whatever going to disney and having the internet and watching movies and
Starting point is 00:35:10 like the oh like do you know what i mean and and and that being like you know the people at the top decided like having everything but then deciding that everyone below them can't have it even like you know yeah i think it is it is like that p flex it's they want their cake they want to keep their cake bear in mind that cake yes they want to keep the cake and they don't want to share the cake but the thing is they're talking about stuff they did in the past but they're still busting people of that were their age when they did it like if if you come out and say i did coke when i was 20 but i'm clean now and i still don't want people to do coke it's all right so you're saying that 20 year olds can do coke or are you saying that they're not or that if they do it it's
Starting point is 00:35:44 a mistake and that's okay i just don't know i i honestly just don't know why anybody cares like it's just i don't even people in prison for this shit that's why i don't even think yeah well i fair enough but i i don't even think it's newsworthy for somebody like you know boris johnson or michael gove to say oh yeah i did cocaine one time or whatever who fucking cares of like we we know that you're an asshole behind the scenes we can just about imagine the kind of shit that you get up to like without you rabbiting on about you doing cocaine when you were 12 years old nobody fucking cares like i certainly do not give a fucking shit about that at all but you'll hear about it time and time
Starting point is 00:36:21 again like it's a big deal sort of thing. I just think it's crap. I just think it's stupid. I think these people just drink their own bathwater, honestly. They just think they're the most important people in the world and that everybody cares so much about what they've done or what they haven't done or whatever. And I think that if most people just sat down and really thought about it, you can imagine that this guy probably does about a billion things a day that you disagree with because he is an asshole you know what i mean like i don't think he should he should be judged for that one thing that he did when he was like 15 years old that he's probably just deflecting you away from how he's acting right now anyway you know what i mean he's probably like yeah i agree with that i can handle them thinking that i'm a dingus for this because actually when i go home i'm i'm beating somebody relentlessly
Starting point is 00:37:10 every day or whatever and i don't want them to find out about that you know what i mean like it's just garbage that's what boris johnson called the dead cat chuck a dead cat on the table so what happens is everyone's talking about something that you don't want to talk about that's bad so what you do is you toss a dead cat on the table and suddenly suddenly everyone's talking about something that you don't want to talk about that's bad so what you do is you toss a dead cat on the table and suddenly suddenly everyone's talking about the dead cat on the table yeah there was he wrote some article about this i think that's a thing that a lot of people do as pr control is you throw them a bone and they talk about the bone rather than what you what they yeah what they should really be focusing on like uh like are you actually good for this job that you're about to get
Starting point is 00:37:45 no yeah let's talk about what you did when you were 12 instead because somehow that's more important like it's so stupid it's just it's just dumb it drives me nuts as well that people just lap up all this shit as well and so are people like gossip i think it should be like minority report right the minority report is like about future it was a warning by the way that's a warning just saying so it's like minority report is like all future it was a warning by the way that's a warning just saying so it's like minority report is like all about like finding people before they commit crimes right so like but you could like you could scale that back it's like i know this guy is gonna have some cocaine on him let's arrest him right yeah okay before he gets the cocaine right i think we
Starting point is 00:38:19 should do it retroactively like michael you know these guys said they had cocaine on them yeah i mean that's like a confession that you were having cocaine let's get him in oh we have this photo actually of you doing exactly what you said and unfortunately now you're under arrest sorry so what i was 15 not sorry you're going to jail you should have told us about it mate you should not have opened your mouth like got away with it you got away with it but now you're fucked you lost your job you're going to jail into the prison with you
Starting point is 00:38:48 why is Darren Brown in my prison cell don't worry about that you don't watch his new series mate I can't sleep what's wrong Michael Gove
Starting point is 00:38:57 how come you can't sleep oh it's a ghost ship that'll stop people doing drugs. That'll stop. Yeah, if nothing else will, that definitely will, right? There's good drugs, there's bad drugs, okay? Weed is now a good drug. It's all right.
Starting point is 00:39:13 It's an all right drug. Cocaine is still a bad drug unless you're a certain amount of rich or you work in the city, in which case it's a good drug. I wanted to do LSD for a very long time, but Mrs. F banned me from doing it. Why? She was like, you're crazy enough as it is so like some residual stuff that can like sit in your spine for like years and stuff right like in LSD sounds awesome sounds like the best value for money drug yeah it's like I think that's
Starting point is 00:39:38 like the chewing gum thing you know if you eat chewing gum it gets stuck you stretch it out a bit there's still some flavor no problem so. Facts. You might want to run for local government or adopt a child or something one day, and they'll do a drugs test on you, and they'll find that in your system. They'll find that LSD. They could just look up this fucking podcast, and he's fucked. There's no way any of us are running for any form of government ever. But 100 incriminating episodes to go through. I want somebody to run for government
Starting point is 00:40:06 who's just straight up. Like somebody who just turns up and is really popular and gets voted in or whatever. And there's no bullshit whatsoever. They're like, yeah, I went through a period about 10 years
Starting point is 00:40:17 where I smoked weed every day. And you're just like, you know what? This guy is straight up. Maybe he's going to suck at the job, but at least he's telling the truth. But maybe if he's telling the truth to that extent, again, it's like the dead cat on the table, right? Maybe there's like worse things behind the scenes.
Starting point is 00:40:35 You never know. You never know. The 10 years before you smoked weed for 10 years, you spent in prison with Derrick Brown. Yeah, yeah. He was doing like a fritzel the whole time. It's like, yeah, I used to smoke weed every day it's no problem like i'm still gonna win and then they find out that he's locked up like seven generations of his family in a dungeon under his house jesus and all the kids are his some of you are going to hear a story in the next few days that i have
Starting point is 00:41:01 a dungeon in my house these rumors are true i wanted to come out and admit, yes, I have 50 people locked up in my house. When I was 15, I did have a dungeon in my house when I was 15, but I haven't had a dungeon for at least 20 years now. I promise. It's upgraded from a dungeon to more of a lair now. When we first started it off, there was no lasers and there was no shark tank or anything.
Starting point is 00:41:28 And now, as you can see, we've come a long way. We've built the shark tank. We've dug to the very core of the earth and I have actually created a race of mole people through years of selective breeding. But if we want to talk about policy, I'm here to talk about policy.
Starting point is 00:41:42 I don't really want to focus on my lair. Oh my God. So LSDd right obviously yeah coming off of that topic and right onto this one yeah ready the things i know about lsd is that first of all it's quite complicated to make actually it's quite a difficult chemical i wasn't gonna make it but that changes how it's available it's like on a little piece of paper right and you just put it in your mouth you put it in your mouth and let it soak in yeah it's like on a little stamp so yeah um you don't need it you don't need a very big dose that's the other thing a very very small dose it's like literally a tiny drip it's much much stronger than some other things which
Starting point is 00:42:18 you need a big old you know snifter off or like a whole a whole pipe filled with it or whatever um and yeah like i remember like that i think for some reason like it's there was a big lsd manufacturer who made like i don't know like a lot of the world supply and he got shut down or whatever eventually and so i think i don't i don't know if you can find it anymore but i recommend like i don't recommend what am i saying i don't recommend you try LSD at all. But if there were a drug that I was like, had to try, I think LSD would be... It's not very popular anymore. Listen to this.
Starting point is 00:42:52 10% of people in the United States have used LSD at some point in their lives as of 2017. While so far this year, only 0.7% of people in the US have used it. It was most popular in the 60s up into the 80s. Let's bring back LSD. All right, let's bring it back. Bring it back in a big way. LSD is typically either swallowed or held under the tongue.
Starting point is 00:43:13 It is most often sold on blotter paper and less commonly as tablets or in gelatin squares. There are no known treatments for addiction if it occurs, but it does not appear to be addictive, although tolerance may occur with use of increasing doses. Just like Rimworld. You were right all along. It was developed in 1938, and it's derived from lysergic acid, a chemical from the fungus ergot.
Starting point is 00:43:41 So the more you know, whoever edits this can play the jingle uh over that too that'd be awesome today we learned about lsd what did you learn about today at school jimmy we learned about lsd at school today did you know that it was developed in 1938 by al Hoffman? Useless. Yeah, good to know. Some of these things have interesting uses. They always talk about using weird stuff to treat weird stuff.
Starting point is 00:44:20 But it's obviously such a kind of, once you make something, I don't know, it feels like once you make something available for broad medical reasons, like marijuana, it's kind of a quick process to making it recreational from there, because you massively increase the supply. I could be completely wrong about that, but I thought that one of the reasons LSD had kind of fallen out of favor was the supply problem. But maybe I'm completely wrong. I don't know. It says as of 2011 of 2011 in europe a typical cost of a dose uh is uh four euros and 50 cents that's a bargain
Starting point is 00:44:51 between four euros and 50 cents and 25 euros so i guess it scales up you can maybe get some potentially life-changing long-lasting well in the 1950s the cia believed that the drug might be useful for mind control so they tested it on people some without their knowledge in a program called mk ultra yeah if you've not seen all that read all that it's really just like a rabbit hole of interesting yeah of course testing that on people it had a lot of problems and people dramatized it in lots of ways because it was kind of interesting government scary stuff especially with all the drug adults stuff like so often tv
Starting point is 00:45:25 shows go into this like i started watching the show on on netflix and i couldn't i couldn't get on with it because it was called it's called night flyers okay right and it was basically a bunch of based on a stephen king short story isn't it about vampires a bunch of dysfunctional guys on a spaceship but they bring like um a super powerful telepath. Nowhere close. There is a Stephen King short story called The Night Flyer about a vampire. I love that. I love how you... Literally the opposite of that. They're in space.
Starting point is 00:45:53 Oh, good. Definitely, I don't remember Stephen King being involved in the... Unrelated to that. Okay, carry on. And they have this like telepathic guy, but he's kind of like a chav. He's like a telepathic chav. And he is just, the writing, just everything about it is just awful. Man, somebody's stealing bodega, it sounds like.
Starting point is 00:46:24 To a T. To a T. It's awful. It sounds like stealing Bodega, it sounds like. To a T. To a T. It's awful. It sounds like Bodega. It sounds just like... No, Bodega's good, though. I mean, it sounds better than that anyway. Jeez.
Starting point is 00:46:35 It should be ready soon, right? I've come off the back. I've actually been editing Bodega. I've fixed about 800 grammatical and spelling errors in it. Wait, some of those are meant to be there. No, no, I've left all of the intent. I fixed the, you've put ellipses in, you know, in the ellipsis, it's three dots. Dot, dot, dot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:56 You put four dots for some reason. But sometimes you put five dots. Jeez, I'm so sorry. Sometimes you put two dots. Sometimes you put six dots. Sometimes you don't leave a space after sometimes you do sometimes you don't capitalize after sometimes you are the i love bodega because it is literally perians telling a story and he's just so excited to get it out on the paper
Starting point is 00:47:16 right and i and i feel like part of me should have left it all as this naturally excited stream of consciousness yeah we're just so excited to get out. But part of me has been like very, very much like, cause I used to be an editor. Right. When I read it, I was like,
Starting point is 00:47:32 I'm going to go through and fix all this. So I fixed it. Yeah. So you put on your fedora and your turtleneck and you got sat down in your living room and you got rolled up your sleeves and you got stuck right in. I licked my pen. I printed it all out on paper. I got my red pen.
Starting point is 00:47:47 I was like, period. Well done. Seven out of 10 for this chapter. Very good. Very good. I like the use of progesterone. I don't want anyone to be annoyed by bad grammar or the inconsistencies in it. Like that's not, there's nothing charming about that.
Starting point is 00:48:04 That's not character to a book. That's's just bad so i'm glad you did that and honestly i knew someone was gonna have to edit it and i just thought they can tidy up all this shit i just want to get the story out it's it's so it was just laziness i'm just a lazy you also what did you fucking write it in because most of the most of the things programs fix all this shit for you these days like it's very hard to like... LibreOffice. I didn't want to have to spend money on words. Are you like George R.R. Martin writing in a fucking typewriter? Wait, couldn't you just use like Google Docs or something?
Starting point is 00:48:33 Just use Google Drive with Grammarly installed. I didn't know about that. Sorry about promoting Grammarly, but Daff basically used to spell every single thing wrong on the Yorkscast Twitter and I was like every time I saw it a little bit of me would die and I eventually got into this all grammily
Starting point is 00:48:50 you sound like you're a fucking riot at parties Lewis you must just be the toast of the fucking party when you turn up you've just unfortunately hit one of my raw nerves I'm sure since you have little raw nerves that are only unique to you, it really would take you.
Starting point is 00:49:07 It's probably like, oh, I hate it when people leave the coal out. Don't put it back in the shed. Oh, they leave the coal out and I need to barbecue. The coal's been all wet. You know what a big one for me is? A big one for me is people eating. If I'm in a room where there's no background uh noise or anything and i can hear the sound of people eating oh my god i could i could murder somebody it drives me absolutely
Starting point is 00:49:32 nuts i hate it the smacking and grunting i have a vision of lewis arriving at a party though some guys bought a load of booze some guys bought a load of cokes some guys bought a load of lsd and he's brought a load of subscriptions to grammar he's just got like he's just got a box full of pencils as well so you could just go around and like correct well it's it's nice because it like spell checks your fucking twitter and your ebay auctions and stuff and so when daf wrote when daf was doing the ebay auctions for the charity thing he spelled um i think he spelled a word wrong but it was four there were four misspellings in one word right one word spelled come on he's wrong he's a young guy some words are complicated you know like words that have two m's or two s's in them and stuff
Starting point is 00:50:19 that can trip you up sometimes even with like the best education you can't remember all that geez no and you know what i am terrible too like as i've because i'm so used to using these these tools that i sometimes just can't fucking spell shit anymore like i used to be great at spelling i suck at typing now i'm really slow at typing the older i get like i feel like i'm so lazy though as well with typing like i won't even try and type something incorrectly. I'll just roughly aim it. And then usually that gives me a correction. You know, it's like I'm just getting slacker and slacker. Yeah. I mean, you should see like some of my fucking like text messages before they get sent.
Starting point is 00:50:55 I just like, it's like I'm like on fucking super drugs. Like I've just licked a toad and I've like got Darren Brown's dick in my mouth. I'm trying to send you a fucking message. Nice. Do you know what I mean? me post the picture that next time you send the message as well like as an accompanying article honestly pictures i mostly just i just isn't it weird how now i don't really make notes i just take pictures of stuff i like take pictures of things to remind me it's like tying and used to be tight used to tie a knot in your handkerchief to remind you to do something.
Starting point is 00:51:25 Oh, my gosh. What are you, 103? Who does that? Nobody. Not a single person has ever done that, I don't think. My dad still does that. He always has a handkerchief, and it's got a knot in it. He has to remember to do something important.
Starting point is 00:51:38 What? What if he forgets to look at his handkerchief? What if he doesn't have to ever blow his honker all day? As a dad, you're always getting your handkerchief out for something someone's always spilled something somewhere i've never owned or used a handkerchief what's like appropriate use of a handkerchief though because you use it to blow your nose and then you put it back in your pocket it's disgusting that is really gross but what if you use it to like wipe up like a small spill or something like that too and then you have to put it back in your pocket. Or like dab your sweaty brow.
Starting point is 00:52:05 You're not sweaty enough to add pee flags. Oh, my God. I sweat plenty. What I do is wash or I use a piece of kitchen paper if I've been out and it's really hot. You're not even. You're wasting the kill of the environment. I just use the bottom of my shirt when I'm sweaty. You lift the bottom of my shirt and fucking just uh do it like that
Starting point is 00:52:26 yeah but if if i'm like out or i'm with people i won't do that or i'll just i'll slick my hand across my head till my hand is covered in sweat and then i'll flick my hand oh you guys ever sweat you guys ever sweat when you eat or sweat just before you're about to eat do you or do you know anybody i sweated on the other night when i had a really hot curry i was sweating under my eyes yeah but like just i'm talking food in general like you're about to sit down to eat like a friday i don't get excitemently sweaty before a meal not typically i the only time i get sweaty is it i get really really really sweaty when i'm playing poker or um like i think it's only then honestly like just every time I'm like in that tense competitive game environment like around the table I just every poker night I've
Starting point is 00:53:12 just stripping with sweat I don't know where it comes from I get sweaty if I talk on the phone for too long like it you know like have you ever talked on the phone for like an hour and then you look down and your your pits are just soaked you're like what with your crush why am i sweating so much whilst talking on the phone it's so weird isn't it like it you know and i'm not like it's not like i'm exercising while i'm talking i'm just sitting there talking on the phone and i'm like do you get like do you get like what what feelings are you having are you enjoying it or are you anxious about it it's like just a pretty neutral feeling
Starting point is 00:53:46 i think like it's not one way or the other sometimes i'm just like i really don't want to get sweaty when you're on so you get sweaty or neutral feelings not exciting or i guess so yeah well it only seems to be if i get clammy like if i'm on the phone too long it's really weird i don't know that is weird and the only other time i'll i'll sweat a lot is you know like you know when you fall asleep and that first half hour to an hour of sleep is like a really deep sleep sometimes that'll be disturbed for some reason i'll wake up and i'm sweating like crazy like i've got the drug for you opiates all right helps with sweats yeah i remember one time it's not consistent either like most nights i'm dry as anything but some nights my kitchen roll and i haven't peed the
Starting point is 00:54:34 bed it's not i don't it's just my head that sweats like i remember one time i woke up and it must have had a fever or something because like i woke up and my my pillow was just like fucking soggy i was sweating so much i had to like I woke up and my pillow is just like fucking soggy. I was sweating so much. I had to like flip it over and stuff. It was really gross. I sweat a lot when I sleep. I don't know why.
Starting point is 00:54:51 Everybody does though, but you just don't really notice it. Like apparently you sweat out like a pint of liquid every night. I've changed over because it's really hot, humid. I've changed over just the other day from like like a full my normal duvet till just the fucking duvet cover yeah same same oh god I find that I need weight on me what like and I haven't been anywhere near as sweaty as I was I need a heavy duvet just put a get a heavy bag of potatoes and rest it on your sheet I could do that yeah I don't know like it just feels weird sleeping with just the sheet like the temperature's not right. It has to be perfect.
Starting point is 00:55:25 Yeah, we get used to it. You've got to get a high thread count. You've got to get 100% cotton with a really high thread count, and then it lets it breathe. I'll get you a sheet. I'll get you a nice summer duvet. Please don't do that. It's like a thick, thick sheet.
Starting point is 00:55:40 I don't want a thick one, though. If you're going to get me one, Lewis, I want it 100% Egyptian cotton, ideally, thick sheet i don't want a thick one though get if you're gonna get me one lewis get i wanted a hundred percent egyptian cotton ideally with like a thousand threads fucking a thousand plus thread count and that shit will keep you perfect you want it hand sewed by poor children i was watching a show about uh clothing and uh how like we as humans manufacture clothing and there's a factory that was processing cotton in like i think it was like oh man i don't even know like kazakhstan or something so some somewhere like that's not a non-existent country no it was like somewhere like that though just to give you an idea it's like one of those places in between like Russia and Europe or whatever.
Starting point is 00:56:27 This place used to have this huge lake. And because they needed so much water to process the cotton, they actually emptied out an entire lake and just destroyed the ecosystem of the entire region because this lake was dried up just to make, just to process cotton so it could be used for like, you know, the big high street stores. The Aral Sea, it's called yeah um completely dried up it's amazing actually to see nuts yeah it's just completely and it was a huge lake too but there's just all these like factories close by that all do the same thing and they need a tremendous amount of water to do it yeah and the lake is now gone. Well, I watched a show the other day on the BBC about factories called Inside the Factory with Greg Wallace.
Starting point is 00:57:10 Oh, my God. Who's a terrible presenter. Yeah. And it was a sausage factory. Right. And it was the most boring fucking half hour. Did he have any anecdotes about how he ate sausages when he was the wee lad and stuff? He did.
Starting point is 00:57:23 I love a sausage, mate. There's nothing quite like bangs and mash. Lovely. Listen. So it's literally half the show was the production line where the sausages come out and they just put them in a box. Yeah. He talked to everyone on the line.
Starting point is 00:57:35 Did they literally show how the sausage was made? For like two seconds. Like they get the meat and then they put it in the sausage. And then it was like, I'm not kidding. Half the documentary was them packaging it. And then he was like, next week I'm to distribution to distribution which guess what it's people putting boxes on a fucking truck i'm like are you desperate or something oh they did one about how pencils were made oh that's quite interesting yeah fuck that was a really good one they're like all german
Starting point is 00:57:56 as well the companies yeah they start with like this this whole tree trunk and they whittle it down slowly into a single pencil oh man you should see one where they the the toilet paper one is crazy too like they they had those big machines those big scorpion king uh log cutter machines in sweden they have these massive forests and they just they they grow these forests to keep up with the demand and then while the forest is growing the other parts of it are being harvested and they're just they can harvest like an entire tree in like 30 seconds and then that gets it gets cut up and turned into paper and then turned into pulp and everything else and then they make fucking so much toilet paper like it would blow your mind it's crazy
Starting point is 00:58:39 that show's awesome it's really good except the Except the sausage one, I agree, was not great. It was one of the bad ones. I think if you'd spoken a bit of weed, P-Flex, you would have loved that sausage. Oh, I would have loved it with some acid. The potato chip one was pretty good too. They showed how they made the paste from Monster Munch and stuff. That was interesting.
Starting point is 00:58:58 All right, well, that's it for the podcast. Thank you, everybody. We will be at your con. We're actually probably going to be live streaming that from YodCon. I just wanted to plug that. Yeah, hang on a sec. What are we on now?
Starting point is 00:59:09 99.7? I know. So how many? That's the next one will be set. This was 99.6. Next is 99.7. Or was this 99.7? This is 99.7, I think.
Starting point is 00:59:17 I don't think it's going to be decimal. I think we're going to have like 13 or 14 before YodCon. No, it's not that long. I don't think we timed it right. This is 99.7. But Patreon, I can say now that
Starting point is 00:59:29 all of the jugs, hopefully, have been sent out to patrons now. So anyone who's a $100 patron would have got a
Starting point is 00:59:36 jug. You don't have to do multiple months of $100 if you don't want. And I'm going to stop that tier on the patron as well.
Starting point is 00:59:43 But thank you. Why? We're not making any more jugs? It's a limited? No, I think there's like 30 or 40 more that that tier on the Patreon as well. But thank you. Why? We're not making any more jugs? It's a limited... No, I think there's like 30 or 40 more that might go in the store. So if you do want one, you can get one later. Wow.
Starting point is 00:59:52 Only after all of the Patreon. Limited edition Triforce jugs. So that you can jug yourself or your loved ones. It's really... I'm glad we got them made. They're fun. Your nemesis, if you have one. So that's it.
Starting point is 01:00:04 Thanks for the support. Thank you for the love everyone and yeah we'll see you next week goodbye bye

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