Triforce! - Triforce! LIVE Mailbag #21: Pickaxe Week 2023

Episode Date: October 4, 2023

Triforce Mailbag Special 22! LIVE for Pickaxe Week 2023! We bust open the mailbag and find some uplifting Triforce stats, the story of some Country Counters which flags our discord to the FBI and hear the most redneck first date that Lewis can't find any problems with! Go to http://manscaped.com and use code TRIFORCE to get 20% off with free shipping. Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickaxe that intro, didn't I? I owned it. You really did, yeah. It's nice. Took charge. Powerful stuff. Just a week ago, you were like, oh, you guys need to do more intros and this is why we can't do them because you just hog them all. Leaps in. Well, you know, it's the alpha male energy that I give out, you know, it's the powerful masculine vigor. The dominance.

The young. The assertion of your dominance. The young wolf of the Trifles podcast, if you like. That's why you get so many ads on Tinder, mate. So many. True, yeah. On that topic as well, not to bring up bad, well, maybe not bad news, but kind of a, you're turning 40 this year, aren't you? I am in less than a month.

Oh my God. Meanwhile, P-Flax is popping his vitamins for 50-year-old man, I heard earlier. Yeah, I've got my Centrum Advance 50 plus. 50 plus. And I take vitamin C and zinc. See, I'm just in the middle. I'm just a 40-something now.

Just like, you know, in the middle of my, not quite 50, but also... You're the filling to our trifle sandwich. That's right, yeah. I'm the cream inside the pie. So, I'm the pie crust. Lewis is the delectable soggy base. Oh, I was thinking I was the tinfoil tray, which you get.

Yeah, you're the tinfoil tray. Yeah. All right. So, lads, we were going to do a mailbag today because I doubt we could talk to each other for an hour and a half without going insane. The thing is, me and P-Flex have spent the entire

week together, so we've exhausted all conversation. What kind of stuff did you guys talk about? Nothing suitable for the podcast. Did you have any, did you guys enjoy like a Shangri-La together, like of an evening and just, you know, get deep? What's a Shangri-La?

I don't know. Sounds fancy. I don't know, I don't even know. Would you care for a little Shangri-La with me this evening? What does that even mean? Would you care for a bit of a strawberry Shangri-La? Oh, you're thinking it's a cocktail. I was thinking it was some sort of affair.

It did sound affairish. Yeah. My wife is a bit of a fan. Yeah. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. I'm a cocktail. I was thinking it was some sort of affair. It did sound affairish. Yeah.

My wife is having a Shangri-La with my neighbour. You wouldn't think it was a cocktail. Well, a different kind of cocktail, I guess. A little bit different. All right. This is from Sam. Do you want to just jump straight in? We could talk a little bit about what we did in the weeks.

Yeah, go for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've yeah we've got time so it was the 15th birthday party last friday night we rented out this little bar that's i guess it's one of these sort of wanky places that people it's kind of around the back and i get the impression that it isn't a normal bar that people go to um it's kind of off the beaten track. So it's. It's a function. It's a function. Underneath the hotel. Yeah.

Yeah. It was, it was not wanky. It was really lovely. I'm not sure where the wanky is coming from. It's got like these paintings hanging on the wall that you can buy. They've all got price tags on them. Do you know what I mean? I reckon local artists sort of,

you know, give them to their place for free. And then with the idea that you're supposed to be able to buy them and so way i looked at you were tempted it sounds like two or three grand each these things and they're like oh now i see why you're calling the originals up there yeah maybe i will maybe i will um no but they had the they had they did a tiktok function earlier in the day with official TikTok, which I find unbelievable. I don't believe that that was actually a thing, but that's what they said. So you just have to take them at their word sometimes.

It was really nice seeing everyone. Had like 50 of us there. No plus ones, which was kind of weird. Because obviously there's a lot of plus ones who we know quite well i mean so it's kind of weird not having them there um and then a few people there who um you know i haven't i haven't seen for a while and who came along like just managed to sneak their way in um it was just really nice it was really really wholesome rich gave a little speech he said to me

you're gonna need to do a speech lewis he told me this the day before and i spent the day thinking should i prepare something i asked period i was like what should i what should i do and pyrrhon was like they don't really want to you don't have to do a comedy set you know you don't want to stand up in front of them. They don't want, they don't care. Just say something cheesy, wholesome, inspirational and nice. And say, here's to another 15 years. So, that's what I did. Did you say, here's to another 15 years? Now get back to work.

No. Did anybody chunder? I don't believe so. Did anybody pee in their pants? One person peed in their pants. Yes, but no comment. We're not going to say who. Did somebody actually pee in their pants?

Yeah. And I think a couple of people chundered as well, but maybe not to my knowledge. But yes, I'm sure there were some chunders. Any pooping in pants? No poop. I don't think so. There was this person called the pississ Bandit who does come along and sometimes piss in people's pants

or their beds. And so, you know, that happened to a couple of people. But yeah, Ravs will tell you about them. Ravs knows. If I did a full piss on somebody or in their bed, they would be drenched.

Like, it wouldn't even just be a little it wouldn't be like a little spot or a puddle or whatever like when i piss i go big it would flood the whole it's a huge piss yeah that would be one of those things where i have to have those industrial fans to like dry the building out uh no chance yeah well then you gotta go that's right um anyway the next day after that we play board games all day me and pflex hang out play board games we did the cowboys we did some zoo building it was we played some games it was great and then the day after that we did um the task box viewing of the new task box episode that's coming out we did a recording before that as well which

was most of the day but then yes we went to the task box and we played coming out. We did a recording tomorrow as well, which was most of the day But then yes, we went to the task box. Oh, we played we played we did the new games now We played the new we played a mini game. Well, we do in this game film film that's against night seven hours That took so fucking long. My god, we started 11 it finished at 7. Yeah, and then we Went to the to me and peer and went to the wrong bowling alley. Oh and then we went to the me and pier and went to the wrong bowling alley we walked all the way to one side of bristol town center to go to what lewis thought was the bowling alley everyone was meeting at and then they weren't there so we had to walk all the way to the other one which just went to the screening it was good went to the screening good to see

which was great because period in the new task box you see it was great to see you on the big screen we went to the cinema to see it so yeah it's been a whole week of like activities and i didn't really do it on purpose i like to kind of when period comes down i like for us to do stuff together but it just kind of happened that um there was a lot on well i mean i timed my i timed coming down around the the celebration because first of all i fucking love a party and second of all i just wanted to see loads of people in one place because sometimes i'll come down i won't get to see this person or i don't get to hang out with that person so i thought this is good because i'll get to see everybody um i just love it normally when period's down i like to try and like give him to other people you know so i think it's like like an unruly child you go and hang out with tom and

ari tonight and i'll push you to the duke you know you and hang out with Tom and Harry tonight and I'll push you to the Duke you know you go and hang out with Ravs and Duncan tonight I'll push you that way but no I've been around

I don't know somehow I got glued on to everyone I've had a really nice week actually everyone is exhausted though everyone is like

telling me like I don't want to do anything else please stop let's just have some you can't convince them to do another 12, please stop. Let's just have some- You can't convince them to do another 12-hour board game session. Everyone's desperate to actually

play some Baldur's Gate or some games. We haven't done that in a week. We can do that next week. We can crack on because we've all finished it now, right? And then some. I started another run right after, but I quit out because I think I just played too much, but I'm down for more.

Cool. I've had a break now. Well, we said we'd pick it up again. So, anyway, that's what we've been up to, Sips. It's been a crazy week. Nice. And, yeah, on top of that, I'm trying to do Jingle Jam prep, which is a nightmare, but it's happening. It's kind of soul-destroying. I've told you enough about it, though. Let's move on from that. All right, let's crack on with the mailbag. If if anyone in chat has a good email that they can compose during this mailbag episode, there's a slim chance it'll get read, but it better be

getting good. It's gotta be good. Not not we don't want any subpar emails. We want really really good ones Level. All right. So this one is from Danny And he's laying out some words and phrases that make him furious and he'd like to get our thoughts on this list I think it's a pretty good list. All right, here's number one staycation The word staycation it's like a fan of the word staycation. It's like a holiday where you don't leave the country. You like if you stay in the UK. Like a local vacation. A local holiday.

I don't know. I feel like a staycation is when you put a tent up in your garden or when you, you know, pretend that you're going on holiday, but you don't leave the house. Like, I think a holiday in the same country you live in is just a vacation. That's just a holiday, right? Stay at home. It's like a break. It's like a little bit of a break from the... You might have seen this one. When people put 28 revolutions round the sun in their bio,

instead of just saying that they're 28. Oh, is that what that is? Yeah. People actually put that? Yeah. And then they wonder why they're single? I've been around the sun 27 to 28 times. Yeah.

I'd date someone who's had that in their bio. Referring to holidays as a holly bobs. That's not a red flag for me. Holly bobs is like a- You're like an old man who's saying that, right? Holly bobs is fine. You're not an old man. You're like an old church pastor who runs a youth club.

Yeah. Or you work at a cafe. Sorry, lads, I'm on my holly bobs next week. Holly bobs is fine. I think it's the lady in the office who's- she's in her 50s and she says, oh, you going anywhere nice on your holly bobs this year? She's like overly chirpy, I'd say. I don't mind.

Again, I think that's not a red flag to me either. Staycation, not a red flag. No. What about when people- I don't really use any of these terms but i don't actually mind i'm not chirpy enough to get with i've i've met a few people recently who do casually use things like holly bobs and stuff like this they talk much more energetically and they they move and they gesture and they you know they they have they have useful energy and vigour about them. And it makes me want to have that, but I don't.

I have the same energy as you two right now. The kind of slightly... Do you think at one point in time, somebody saying Hollybobs was the equivalent of like somebody now saying that something is sick or lit or something? You know, like like do you think that that was ever the big thing like fuck yeah man holly bobs like i'm undoubtedly yeah i don't know like maybe like the 1930s or something i think holly bobs sounds like one of them yeah like like in chat one of them words that you start using ironically and eventually it becomes

unironic yeah i don't like here's another one when people caption their photo like they'll be holding the drink it's five o'clock somewhere that's what people are referring to their their husband as hubby oh yeah hubby uh people who check into a hospital on facebook with no description just to get comments from their friends like you okay hun And then for them to respond with, inbox me, hun, xx. Oh, God. Yeah, that's kind of lame. What is this? What are these people?

It's not anything I've ever done. This is a more accurate representation of someone than their pictures even sometimes, right? Like, if you can really get insight into what someone's like from that kind of thing, can't you? Like, if you can really get insight into what someone's like from that kind of thing, can't you?

It really drives it home. Go on, carry on. That's it. The other ones were just not worth reading out. I didn't think those were so bad. So, the writer has written in and is annoyed by these. Alright, so these are

yeah, that was Danny said these are phrases and words that make them furious. So I gave it 110%. Furious. I gave it 110%. Just touching base. I hate that. The customer is always right, apart from the 95% of the time that they're wrong, according to Danny. And when Americans say I could care less instead of I couldn't care less. I could care less. I could care less. That is a very American thing. They defend it as well. They will defend that.

110%. They'll say that's how we say it in America. 1000%. Yeah, 1000%. What is the phrase that people use is like usage dictates meaning or something like that. So essentially all language is vague and if people use it that way that's how it another another american thing that i've noticed like not recently but like more maybe more recently is is they say right like you know like you're saying something you're like oh i hate that right yeah right what what are you saying to me that doesn't make sense to me but they say it a lot.

I don't like I've spoken about this before on the podcast when when I've been at a restaurant with the Americans, the way they order, they'll say, I'll do the I'll do this. I'll do the steak. I'll do the steak. Just say, can I have the steak, please? I'll have the steak, please. I'll do steak. And then please, no, thank you. Just I'll do the steak just say can i have the steak please i'll have the steak please i'll do stick and no please no thank you just i'll do the steak i wonder if i i think it depends who you're hanging out with right but you do tend to mimic their speech patterns and i feel like i could very

easily see myself slipping into these weird ways of speaking unconsciously um just to fit in. But sometimes go the opposite way as well and order very weird, very Englishly. Could you be so kind as to give me the stoke? One steak, please, sir. Could one please have some Grey Poupon with the French fries, please? Grey Poupon!

That ad did not exist over here, but it was a big thing in the states right the wayne's world one yeah okay it was it was wayne's world originally right no it was an advert oh yeah it was i think pardon me do you have any gray coupon That was a classic. 110%. This one's from Katie. Hi, boys. Sorry for the long email. I genuinely tried to cut it down. TLDR

paid a lot of money to see some bands and got stranded in the woods instead. You can read about this. This is a new story happening right now. This is live reportage from the ground. On what news site? News... Just, well, no, no, just Google this. BBC News.

No, Blue Ridge Rock Festival. No, there's nothing on this one here. There is. My partner and I busted our asses to get to the Blue Ridge Rock Festival in southern Virginia to see our favorite band. They started their opener, huge drops of rain pelted us, which was a welcome relief in the 95 degree weather. I don't know how hot that is. What bands were playing? I don't know. Look it up. It was a great concert experience. Well, I'm looking up the news and the only thing I can find is Gary Lineker now has rules

for social media. Stop looking on the BBC website and type Blue Ridge Rock Festival. Blue Ridge Rock issue statement after cancellation of Hot Mess Festival amid diarrhea complaints. Blue Ridge Rock Fest 2023. This happened on Thursday, September the 7th, and it went through till Sunday, September the 10th. There you go. The 2023 lineup for Blue Ridge Rock Fest. Wow.

Wow. Slipknot, Pantera. I'm treating this, yeah. Shinedown, Five Finger Death Punch, Limp Bizkit, Evanescence. Oh, my God. Megadeth, Lamb of God, Papa Roach. Oh, my God. That is a huge lineup.

Jeff Hardy, Rise Against, Three Days Grace, Cypress Hill. Fuck off. Christ. Jeez, Babymetal? I think God was trying to stop this festival from happening. That's why the weather went so bad. Three Six Mafia? This is literally my entire shelf from the 90s.

Yeah. Yeah. There we go. They started their opener and huge drops of Cool Rain pelted us, which was a lot of relief. Down at the bottom here in the club experience artist, vanilla ice and insane clown posse. Oh my God. Holy shit. Get me out.

It was a great concert experience until the wind picked up and the lead singer said, Hey guys, we're out. They rushed off stage and we got an announcement saying we would evacuate you to severe weather and go back to the shuttle buses. The parking lots were five miles away, which will become important later. We milled about for a few minutes because it didn't look too bad. And then the rain and wind subsided. The prerecorded message stopped, but none of the staff had been updated on what was going on. We waited near the exit until lightning cracked just to the side of us.

Everyone collectively yelled, and we all started to walk towards the exit. We had 30,000 to 50,000 festival goers begin trekking through mud towards the shuttle stop where the two buses were waiting. Close lightning kept cracking overhead, but despite being in an incredibly dangerous

situation, everyone kept their cool. Holy shit, man. Out of this whole lineup, the only person I would actually even remotely want to see is probably Danzig, that's it. Danzig? The rest of this is just my worst nightmare. This is just- America though, like, the weather in America is much more dangerous. It's a four-day rock festival in America. Jesus.

Where was this, West Virginia? Yeah, West Virginia. Southern Virginia. Is this a thing that can happen? Suddenly these bad weather conditions can roll in and- I mean, maybe they were like, oh, it's a bit great, and then all of a sudden- You can do some camping while you're there. Yeah.

So it was a blowy storm. Now it's the lowest tickets and camping prices of any four day rock festival in America. That's what the slogan is. There you go. But apparently a total mess. A hot mess. A hot mess. All right.

Next email. That sucks. I'm sorry to hear that. Sorry, Katie. This one's from Sam. You guys have spoken at different times about ways to punish your kids or threaten them with punishment, such as counting down from three or sip saying i'm gonna phone grandpa yeah i worked with a guy works by the way still works i worked

with a guy a few years back who had a cracker away to keep his son in line he would carry a receipt in his wallet and when his son probably six to seven at the time began to act out he wouldn't shout he would simply go into his wallet produce the receipt and tell his son he was still within his refund period. So if he kept playing up, he'd return into the shop. He's seen it in action once and it worked every time. I like that one. It's worth a try. That is worth a try.

That makes that- that fucks with your mind, though, right? Like, you think that you are like a Buzz Lightyear doll or something. Do you know what I mean? In your 30s, you're wearing people's skin if that's your choice because you've you're a kid right and you've seen all these even more lifelike dolls in the supermarket you might think that's where you came from that's like a more plausible origin story than whatever the fuck actually happens doesn't really work in a movie if they're like turns out the killer was threatened with being returned to the shop as a prank by his father. And the cops would be like, well, that explains why he's a serial killer then.

No one does that. Yeah, it doesn't sound that bad to me, in all honesty. No, I think it's fine. I also think the fact you remain calm is pretty funny. I like that. Yeah, I think it's just that maybe it's just so kind of strange to threat that that's the that's the real threat right they don't know they don't know they can't call you on it oh yeah go on then and then suddenly they're in a warehouse they're just waiting to be picked up i think kids obviously

taking a risk aren't they they're always going to be like what happens if i you know if i push this right that's when they start getting tricky uh when they start calling your bluff yes my My 14 year old is at that stage now where she's like a poker player who started to learn when to- she spotted your tells and she's figured out, oh, they can't actually do anything about this. There's time- it's weird with like the older they get, maybe it's different with a 14 year old but certainly with an 11 year old, there's like- we find now like if he's tired, he'll play up a lot more yes but he'll be really sassy and just kind of like uh like obstructive in weird ways and stuff like he's

he's like he's like pushing boundaries and stuff but it's not like it's not awful but it's just it's just annoying you know it's angsty but yeah it's only like it's only like if he's really tired and then you know Something doesn't go his way or something. Yeah, I think that I've got the same with my little girl There's she's always been a bit more dramatic. I remember one time Her and her and mrs. F and my oldest were out They've gone somewhere for a weekend and they were on some little bicycles Just doing very gentle tour of this sort of

countryside not a big hike or cycle or whatever yeah and she was really tired and she was so tired she told them that she got off her bike and threw it on the ground just lay on the ground near a tree and they're like come on we gotta go she's like no leave me i live here now i'm too tired to go like she but she'd given up and i I think they'd left she would have just laying there She just given up, but she her energy levels are like she's fine. She's fine. She's fine. And there's like BAM I was like complete crash. So what we figured out is you just have to constantly feed her Just all the time and she's like a stick So I think she just burns energy to just keep giving her food all the promise of ice cream or whatever

And she'll be absolutely no problem. Yeah. OK, so it's like it's like. The older your kids get, the quicker they get bored as well. You're doing something. And boredom is like just the worst thing, like the worst affliction that they could ever suffer through. You know, how long are we going to be waiting for? About 10 minutes. Oh, yeah.

It's like 10 minutes. Come on. I mean, like sometimes i say i'm like you think i want to do this like all day long like it's non-stop i have to do shit i don't want to do all day long you're bored for five minutes i'm fucking bored the minute i wake up we are no the minute i go to bed i'm bored we. We are different. We're no different. Like any person on a train for five seconds is on their phone. You know, any any we put like that doesn't go away. You know, it's always that. But we don't turn to the other passengers and go, I'm bored. I'm bored. We don't make a big deal about it.

We start crying. We just imagine you're just like sitting on the train. Oh, my God. When did we get? get oh i'm so bored he's on my seat get off my seat oh that's what it's like here's another one this is this is a this is a statistical email from tom uh as a certified mega fan of the podcast, I decided to put together some neat looking- Wait, who certified you? This guy, apparently.

No, but who certified him? You can't say certified without certification. That's a good point. Tom, you're not certified. We have to certify you as a mega fan. I might have certified him. We're the mega fan gatekeepers. I might have done it.

And I didn't see any paper across my desk in this regard. True, I signed and stamped nothing. Well, no, nothing. We just need, it's like a joint bank account. Only one of us needs to sign. Well, I think it's a... I've been selling certificates at the back of my van for years.

Oh, man. This is a graph about how Triforce has changed over the years. The whole thing took longer than I thought. So I've only plotted one key metric so far. Consistency. Right. Which I like.

Despite my initial idea, the podcast was run haphazardly and with little planning. You fucking go to hell, Tom. How dare you? It's true. Go to hell. You go down to H-E double hockey stick. We'll see you there. Yeah.

I've discovered you guys have done a good job consistently throwing out podcasts. In the strictest terms, consistency has been good over the last two years. In 2022, we released exactly one podcast per week on average. And this year, you're on track to do the same. Nice. Being less strict,

consistency has been good for almost four years. In 2021 and 2020, 0.92 podcasts were released per week on average. So, you know, we missed a few weeks. Prior to this, consistency was not so good.

Of particular note is 2018, which I consider to be the laziest year of Triforce so far. Only 27 podcasts were recorded, tied with 2016 when the podcast started late in March. A lot of the trend lines show similar behavior. Do you guys want to see this graph? So what we only did 50% in the first two years.

I think that we didn't really make a big thing of it. Now we're like, we're going to need some extras and all the rest of it. So obviously, the idea of this podcast is that it's kind of relatively timely. Like a lot of the time we record the podcast and it'll go out the next week. But the mailbag has been a real help to fill in those gaps when you guys are away or I'm away. I hope it's like a beautiful pie chart. It's a graph. I hope it's a beautiful visual, like one of those uh you know maps like uh

like a uh you know with the with the big balls and the small balls that's it i don't know if you can show that on stream live how am i gonna do it if you if you click on the top right of discord there's a button that says show chat i don't have a computer i see it yeah yeah yeah that's nice that's nice um yeah i don't know i don't know if there's a way for me to show it you're eating a banana either way it's posted in the channel i don't know if anybody can get it at home just imagine a fucking graph where the x-axis is month yes the y-axis is podcast released per year and And 2022 we did 52. So we did, we did plenty. And obviously we're at this, at this stage here, we're exactly on course to match our best year ever, which was last year. The consistency has, so we had a hundred percent

consistency last year. Yes. So we are, we are, that's amazing. That's amazing. It must have been like a heavy travel year, right? I'm sure we were all traveling a lot like 2018 didn't we go to? Seattle for like two weeks Lewis in 2018 As well we weren't recording ahead of time now, I mean we don't do the mailbag We didn't we didn't do two episodes a week, which we sometimes do to get ahead like we didn't do any of that So this was just us recording basically when we were free that was the old days and now obviously we've uh we've moved on it's all it's all far more i think actually

you know what it is it's really just luck like a lot of the time we got a little bit ahead and then we went away and then we got a little bit ahead and every single time it just tends to be we've just just got enough podcasts every time we got exactly the right amount we're not really trying a lot of the time you know this podcast is treated fairly casually we don't stress out over it if someone can't make it for whatever reason we're just like okay we'll do it next week um but and so we're not intending to be 100 it just is it's luck so but thank you for noticing that's it's i appreciate you noticing because i'm proud of it. I'm actually really proud that we've managed to be consistent.

It's a pleasure to provide a good thing to people. A good service. I'm just going through the motions with it now. You're just trying to poop it out. Do you guys want to hear, is the title of this this email the most redneck first date ever oh that's so good hit me all right uh howdy y'all it says please do your best hillbilly accent for this well i've been a listener since the start of the Yogg's

Cast View since 2012. This is in reference to episode 262 when you asked people to write in about the worst first dates. It's goofy. I can see the lack of teeth in your mouth right now. In 2020, I dropped out of college

and moved back to my hometown in bumfuck nowhere vermont might be a real place that's a place when quarantine finally lifted i was lonely but mostly horny so decided to put myself out there and go on some dates i imagine when i hear this i just imagine somebody hibernating and then you know coming coming around after a long hibernation just being really horny yeah just getting out there and just being like just get it on that should be inside yeah they pop out of the hibernation tank and they all just start fucking like rabbits that would be a change in star trek that would really change things up um we were uh so there was a match with a girl i knew from high school we were never friends but i remember her seeming like a pretty chill person boy did she change for starters she must have used

old photos because she was significantly larger i have nothing against plus size people and most of my previous partners were larger but the fact she hid this felt pretty dishonest normally i could overlook it we all have insecurities i don't have a rippling six-pack myself, but this was only the tip of the iceberg. The day itself was just meeting up at a local lake to go fishing. That's incredible. Wow.

A fishing day. Yeah. Did she bring her own rod? Well, I think she was hoping to use his. But we'll find out. When she got out of the car, a good amount of cans spilled out with her i awkwardly helped her pick them up i noticed that she had two or three trash bags crammed in there

as well i know she wasn't homeless or anything because later on in the date she mentioned how she had a curfew she's 25 years old she has a curfew it must be weird to to hook up with somebody that you went to school with after a couple years and they've changed you like yeah or a lot sort of thing because you have that familiarity with them and maybe a bit of trust through the familiarity but clearly if somebody's getting out of a car with cans spilling out and garbage bags and yeah whatnot you just think this person has changed substantially it's a very funny image you both park up next to this beautiful lake in Vermont, you know, ready to fish. This gorgeous fisherman gets out with his, like, red check shirt. Is this going to be, like, one of those things, like, no, this is, I just made this all up.

It's actually just the plot of Finding Nemo or whatever. No, no, no. It's like a rusty, the rusty door scrapes open, tits spill out, and the big boots, like, clonk down. Like, oh, no. It's like the rusty door breaks open, the tins spill out, and the big boots like clonk down. Like, oh my God. She also pulled a knife on me as we were heading from our cars to the water.

Could have just been an awkward joke since she just showed me the knife and said something like, don't try anything. But she seemed serious and it made me very uncomfortable.

Jesus. She then proceeded to spend the next half an hour telling me about how she'd bumped into her ex in a Walmart and they decided to get back together. This was when she was on a date with this guy. But the real cherry on top was when she mentioned very flippantly that her cousin had repeatedly tried to hook up with her

after we'd all graduated. She wasn't joking either because we have multiple cases of incest at our school. The date did not last long. Well, I'm sorry to hear that. Congrats on a terrible, terrible date. Okay. That's got to be one of the worst ones we've had for sure.

It's pretty bad. That's a pretty bad one. And we've had some bad ones as well. I don't know if I've seen any red flags there. Louis is just so desperate for a date now. My standards are rock bottom. I would take that easy. How many cans did you say it was?

Tiltry's okay, but like five or six? Oh my God. I can fix her Alright I got another one for you here These are a few stories my dad told me When he worked for What is CN Rail It's Canadian National Rail

In Alberta Canada as a conductor So most of the tracks are one track With sidings for passing Other trains So with grain trains that may have to stop So most of the tracks are one track with sidings for passing other trains. So with grain trains, they may have to stop to let another train pass. The cars will leak attracting deer. And when the deer gets scared, they run directly away from the danger,

straight down the tracks and get fucking smashed to bits by trains coming the other way, which is awful. One day they're exiting a tunnel next to a river and there were sheep or goats all over the track. And upon exiting the tunnel, the train just sent sheep flying absolutely everywhere. Fucking hell. And across the river, there were a bunch of campers. And I guess they would have just been enjoying a nice scenery and then... Out of the tunnel. So there's fucking sheep.

Fucking bits of sheep everywhere. Fucking unbelievable. A hoof. Yeah. Wow, that sounds great. That's like, you know, sheep brain. Yeah, that's like good. That's like kind of good weather.

They can like cook that all up on the barbecue, right? You get it fresh. Yeah, you can barbecue that easy. Yeah, you can barbecue that. We're eating well tonight. Mate, back on Amanda, everyone. This is an email from Jacob. Longtime listener here from the UK For the past three years I've been an engineer

Working in nuclear fusion Wow I was so hooked on the conversation about Sips' New dishwasher in Mailbag Episode 17 That the transition to fusion really caught me off guard We do have these hard turns in the mailbag. We do.

I almost feel like we haven't finished talking about the festival. We haven't really processed the Canada Rail deer and sheep getting hit. And now we're already talking about dishwasher and fusion reactors. It's kind of like- I need to get a new one. We have a slimline one, but it's at capacity. We need a big one. We need a real big one. There's five of you. You're going to need a big one. We need a slimline one, but it's at capacity. We need a big one. Yeah.

We need a real big one. I know there's five of you. You're going to need a big one, so. We need a huge one, yeah. Sips mentioned a project to crack fusion in France. This is a project called the International Thermonuclear Experimental Reactor. As the name suggests, although it's being built in France, it's an international collaboration involving the EU, UK, China, Japan, US, and Russia.

Many of these countries have designed and built individual parts, which are then shipped to France to be assembled. You know what's going to happen? Go on. It's going to be a success, and then France is going to turn around and say, we did it. Yeah, we are- That's what they do every time.

That's their trademark move. They do that all the time. Almost their raison d'etre. Yeah. As you can imagine, with so many big players, there's a lot of politics involved. This combined with some huge engineering challenges, means the project is running massively behind schedule. Unfortunately, the machine will still only be an experimental reactor

and therefore not produce electricity for the grid. Instead, it will be used to prove scientific theories that we can extract more energy from fusion than we have to put in. The next generation after this project are expected to be actual power plants that could turn the fusion energy into useful electricity. Unfortunately, that's decades away, so don't get too excited. So there you go. If you have any questions about fusion, fire away and maybe Jacob can tell us. God, yeah. I have no idea. If I put my head in the fusion reactor,

what would happen to it? This is sort of what we get about CERN, isn't it? It's such a typical fucking idiot punter question about any scientific project. If I went into a black hole, what would happen? If I put my head in a black hole, what would happen to me? It's always if I put my... Why don't you put your head in anything first?

Like, put your hand in maybe something you don't mind. Just go in head first. I mean, you might lose it, but you might not die straight away. I love that. If I put my head in this meat, if I were to put my head in this wood chipper. Oh, dear. Oh, fuck. This Halloween season,

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its area limitations and wanted to expand the major problem is that many of the buildings surrounding the zoo are listed buildings it's quite a snazzy yeah it is it is a snazzy part it is so they couldn't purchase them and demolish them to build the extra space they need so they just fucking move that's it yeah fair enough we all thought i thought it was close i think the place that they moved to is better anyway it's a lot more natural looking it's it's bigger there's they they can build bigger enclosures and and stuff i think they'll they'll be able to better take care of all the animals and stuff there too. And they can get more animals.

It's much bigger. More in there. Jam them in. Jam them in. I feel like they've lost the branding. Stack them up to the rafters. They've lost the branding, you know? The branding of Bristol Zoo?

Who's going to go to the wild place? You know, people go somewhere and they look up a zoo and they go to the zoo. They're not going to look up the wild place. What's that even? Well, maybe they can always- And it's miles away. It's not too late. It's just going to be school trips going there. Yeah.

And that's it. Well, Longleat isn't in the middle of a town, really. No, and honestly, Longleat isn't branded that well either. It's just the name of a big country estate. Like, it's, you know- I mean, you know, I think if it's bigger, I mean, look at Thorpe Park. You know,

that's not, it's not in the middle of a neighborhood. You've got to drive to get there. I think you're wrong, Lewis on this. Yeah. When we, when we went Lewis,

like it was early on to like Bristol zoo was still open and we went and it was packed. There was tons of people. Wow. Yeah. Well, I'm wrong then. I'll be right.

This is a, this is from Nick. Long time listener from the netherlands here please don't do an accent okay right okay i wanted to email you guys about two returning topics within your podcast where the listeners are and what they do for work this is quite interesting sips is very sensible rant on why anyone would ever want to go to a dangerous place like death canyon and so on gave me a chuckle, and I realised you might be interested in my work. I don't file anything, but I work as a tour leader for a British company travelling with international groups to off-the-beaten-track destinations.

Syria, Iraq, Venezuela, North Korea, Yemen, Mali and so on. Oh god. I expect there are only a few dozen of us doing this sort of work full time. Well, now there are anyway, that's for sure. I currently am in Afghanistan listening to the podcast and leading a two week trip where we visit the historical sites of the country, but have to deal with the Taliban on a daily basis. Good grief.

See attached photos. And then there is a photograph of a car with an ISIS flag hanging from it. Post it in the chat. I want to see this. Okay, let me download these. There's a picture. So to describe it to chat, the guide is the guy on the right with the green scarf. Then there is a lad next to him with an AK-47 Oh my God. And a lad next to him as well. There is a picture of a car with a big ICC look and flag on. There is a picture of one of the Afghanistan gun shops where you can just buy pretty much any gun you want.

And there is also a picture of a pretty stunning. It looks like possibly the inside or the outside of a mosque. Like some sort of. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's some insane tile work on that. It is. That's some fucking tile where I could imagine the Taliban are closing in and you're like, geez, this is some nice tiling you've got here. What kind of ground is that? The discord is now flagged by the CIA as well.

They're looking at tiles, sir. Send a drone strike right away. So there we go. Our clients are often interested in geography slash socio politics slash history. But most of what we call country counters. Oh, my God. People trying to visit all the countries. Yes.

Websites and communities keeping track of all of it. Yes. The whole thing does get a bit obsessive and ridiculous with people stealth camping overnight at the Vatican because they think you need to spend at least 24 hours in a place to say that you've been there. So with the Vatican, 24 hour stealth camp, you imagine the Pope just bumping into you. You know, what are you doing? And you're just like hiding in one of the toilets or something. And the Pope comes in. On the other hand, some people think flying and out and just to sort of tick off

the list and the committee has polls on whether being blackout drunk and not remembering a country counts as having been there um or what if you entered illegally or you just drove through but never got out of the car and physically touched the ground um i think i think you should make up your own rules as long as you spiritually believe you saw the essence of that country that's fine right like i don't i don't like the idea of just being in the airport i think you have to get out of the airport do you mean yeah i feel like i don't mind the stay the night rule but i also think that you don't necessarily need that like if you've walked around vatican city for the day you've fucking seen 90 in that country that's more than any other fucking country you're going to see in a day, you know.

Yeah. Or ever. I mean, I haven't seen 90% of the UK, but. Oh, God, yeah. I mean, yeah. Certainly, I mean, I may have been past a lot of it in a car or on a train or on a plane, but I wouldn't say that I've experienced it. I've never been to Cheddar Gorge or Wookie Hole, but I'm sure I've driven past them both many times. I'm just saying you could 100% the Vatican City quite easy, right?

Go to all the pubs. I think you could. Go to all the museums. The pubs. Do you know what I mean? Like, you could, you know, check out a lot of it, have a walk around. And whereas that's...

So, I guess, you know, I don't necessarily agree with the overnight camping bit i i think you just have to feel a sense of of of awareness you know i've seen this a couple of i've seen a couple of um people on the dating apps have got like country counter tickets they're like oh 76 out of 148 or whatever and they're very proud of that. And that's, I think, it's a fun idea. I agree. But as Nick goes on, there are some people,

the people that have the time and money to do this trips can be eccentric. And as a tour leader, we've seen it all. E.g. there's underwear man who leaves a worn pair of underpants everywhere he goes.

Just like, I don't know why. No idea why. Also, we also had one guy that tried to defect to North Korea while on tour and another one that walked up to a pride of lions

in Chad thinking that he could pet the cubs did he put his head in did he put his head in their mouth what would happen what would happen

put a lion in his lion's mouth thought that he could pet the cubs if the mums were sleeping. Fuck in hell. Wow. These guys, they're almost like little toddlers.

You have to keep them safe. I think that's a lot of it, yeah. Wow. Those three are exactly the kind of people I would imagine would be doing this sort of dark tourism stuff. That's kind of what it is, isn't it? It's like going to Chernobyl or something, you know? Yeah. Oh, God, we were watching. Were you watching that vid,

Lewis? The one where there were the guys that swam in the water? Who was showing it to us? There's this lunatic on YouTube who's this Ukrainian guy who's Russian-speaking and he visits Chernobyl with his mates and they mess around in the reactor.

Well, they just... Dude, they go in. You know the way it's got a concrete shroud over Chernobyl to stop anybody getting in? They get out of the way to get in. They made a diving suit out of a literal fishbowl and then what looks like a bunch of bin bags

and tape and the guy pumps air to him with a bicycle pump. They go in the water and fuck around in the Chernobyl reactor and like trying to get into the. It is absolutely insane. And I don't know why the fuck they do it other than the clicks. I guess it's bizarre. It's absolutely. They drank some water from the

flipping under the power plant like they drank the water it's insane dude um one of them raps was telling me one of them went to the doctor with and they said he had light radiation poisoning or like light radiation sickness and they said drink some peppermint tea that was the fucking thing that the doctor said for them to do yeah what the fuck is that it's awfully crazy oh so yeah that is um that is who is doing that like it's crazy it is how many views do they get though god knows quite a lot if we're talking about it i assume yeah we're pretty late to the party you know if we if we've heard about something... I'm going to go buy some bin bags right now. I'm going to go buy a fishbowl. I'm getting in on this.

It's a new trend. Literally, I mean, the sarcophagus, I guess, has been built deliberately for this exact reason, to stop idiots breaking in. It's amazing that whoever... They were obviously like, you know, some fucking idiots are going to try and get in here. We're going to have to build a giant concrete shell.

I guess it's to stop debris getting out as well. But you just know. What would happen if I put my head in the fucking shed? That's how the accident happened in the first place. They knew that. There was a meeting. Comrade Dyatlov was like, what would happen if I stuck my big head in the back? of was like, what would happen if I stuck my big head in the back? Then I think, uh, I feel like that's the kind of place where you wouldn't really

need to worry about people getting in or out of it. Right. I think for the, for the most part, most people don't want to go anywhere near there. And then for the people that do want to go near there, well, I mean, you can't, yeah, I wouldn't go out of my way to well, I mean, you can't. Yeah. I wouldn't go out of my way to stop them. Just let them crack on. All right.

This is a funny but sad Tinder experience. Do you guys want to hear this? Yes. Yes. Fuck me. This is from Scott. This is from anonymous. From anonymous.

I did not write this in. Lewis wrote in. Regarding the discussion about dating apps, I wanted to share an amusing yet somewhat disheartening dating experience of mine. After a few months of using Tinder with little success, I decided it was time to call it quits. However, since I'd already paid for Tinder Plus, I didn't want my money to go to waste,

so I came up with an idea. Instead of using my own profile, I decided to portray myself as the Sorting Hat from Harry Potter. Given that many of the girls on the app were Harry Potter fans, with some even making it their defining characteristic, I thought the Sorting Hat profile might pique their interest and lead to some matches. My plan was to read their profiles and sort them into Hogwarts houses accordingly. I created the Sorting Hat profile and took a bold step. I swiped right when every woman aged between 18 and 30 within a 20 mile radius of my hometown.

Soon enough, the matches started pouring in. Didn't take long for me to dive into their profiles, scrutinize their photos, read their bios and craft messages based on their personality traits and the house I assigned them to. For instance, one girl worked as a zookeeper and had pictures of the animals she cared for. Assigning her to Hufflepuff was a no-brainer. She was overjoyed with the sorting. No, me neither. Some other girls whose profiles left me with doubts didn't take kindly to being placed in Slytherin. I simply shrugged in response via text.

I've heard these words before, but I didn't realize what they were. They're house names for... For House. For Hufflepotter. For Hufflepotter. For H. Perhaps for Huffle Potter. Harry Potter. That's how well we know Hufflepuff. I did all of this late one evening and eventually headed to bed the next morning I

was greeted by an astonishing sight more matches than I'd ever seen before. I had more matches in one night the most guys could dream of having in their lifetime. As I scroll through these women's profiles, it felt surreal. It was as if a curtain had been lifted, revealing a flood of matches after months of receiving only occasional ones. I was inundated and it was quite disheartening to realize that the fictional sorting hat had managed to secure more matches than I ever had or likely ever will. Girls I thought I might have a chance with had never matched with me, but they eagerly awaited their house sorting. I decided to delete their profile and never do it again Scott great story mate. That's great story

That feels like a wait So you so did you ever go on a date with any of these people like to to share your research or anything? No, I think they just wanted to be sorted. They just wanted to be there was no attempt at dates That's so funny. I think they just wanted to be sorted. They just wanted to be sorted. There was no attempt at dates. That's so funny. I think it's... Right, well, here's the thing. I can understand why. What's the point?

Like, he's just spending his time doing it, but it's not going to lead anywhere. There's no date comes out of it. There's no date. He just want to be sorted. Well, okay, for one... He could have been using his time to get an actual date. Sometimes people like to just do fun, jokey, silly stuff.

Like, two. Two, I think i could easily see someone like you know fucking a youtuber like max fosh or someone you know do this as their thing oh i made a fake sorting hat profile and told girls what house they would be in or you know some so you know it's like a side men type shit right you could see that as a as a thing it's that i like people on omegle you know doing the fake profiles or whatever. Sometimes people just want to entertain other people. What's Omegle?

What's Omegle? It's that one where you match with strangers on video. And there's always viral clips about people surprising people. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then also, like, sometimes I think when you're on Tinder, it's all very serious. It's very much like, oh, God, you know. It's nice to get, like- I saw a clip where I think when you're on Tinder, it's all very serious. It's very much like, oh God, you know, it's nice. I saw a clip where I think it was two friends. They were like chatting to each other and they had these avatars of like these very attractive people or whatever.

And when it came down to it, they went on to the thing and the video thing. And then it revealed them on the video and they knew each other. And were just like they just they were dead they were like laughing so hard. Oh, good. Is it that? Is that Omegle? I'm sure yes, that is I think so. I saw one where it cuts to this is two lads match with this guy and I'll see if I can do this on camera. I'll be back in two seconds. He was sort of doing this underneath the table and they were as well.

That's right. And then they go up and they're like playing a little violin and he's shining a shoe. That's right. I think that was what it was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought it was pretty funny. That's good. There's a good, there's a good, someone in chat says, big Russian Vladimir.

There's this, there's this Russian guy who dresses up like a proper pink pinky-haired girl anime streamer really cute and um and he speaks with this like really light girly voice for a little while but then suddenly he's like it's me vladimir it's great um he's quite famous is for doing it on on there um but yes, big fan. So I think sometimes PFLAX, people just get a bit like overwhelmed

by the seriousness of these dating sites. So I can imagine swiping on something that's a silly profile at the sorting app. There aren't enough of them on there

to be honest. And yeah, I mean, you can't expect to get a date out of that if you're the fucking sorting app. That's not how it works.

Yeah, no, it's not going to anywhere but i mean it is it is kind of sad i think because you know it's just not being matched like you feel like you're casting your net so wide it feels like it's it's like if you went fishing in an area where all the fish had already been caught and it's just just, you're still hopeful, but you obviously see people like, oh, the fishing is not about catching fish. So, you know, going on dates and trying to put your profile, this feels like fun at first,

but after a month of coming up with empty line after empty line, it stops being fun. And it just, you realise the sea is empty and it's kind of tragic. It's very sad. Yeah. It's very soul crushing. I think it's very soul-crushing i think it's very hard to well i still love you if you want if you want if it doesn't work out with mrs f we can get married oh is that my is that a proposal no it's not a proposal it's a suggestion that would contract not very romantic obliged well no but i mean romance is dead mate you but you found that

out oh my god it is chry is on life support for sure. Yeah. I won't be able to satisfy you physically, but we can play board games anytime you like. Oh, we- You will have to put up with quite a few cans of cider being drunk and a lot of dotes. It feels like you're saying, if you don't love me as I am, you don't deserve me, whatever. Do you know what I mean? When I'm, What is it? If you don't love me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best. That feels like that's what you're saying right now.

You smoothie. It's like you're setting me up. You're setting up already for this. You're setting the low expectations. You're like, we'll get married, but I'm going to fucking slobber out and drink cider and ignore you. But it's better than being alone.

Is that better than being alone? I guess. Probably not. But you seem like you'd you'd want that some company uh or you could just move in we could put a little granny annex in the garden and you can it can be the lulu love pad and you can live at the bottom of my garden but who's coming you'll just visit every night will you or every other night well we'll you'll, you know, I don't know. No, I haven't thought it through. All right, okay. So, yeah.

You can just live near us. We'll throw food out to you in the evening. Oh, thank you. Like bits of sheep that have been hit on the train tracks nearby. Yeah. This is a quiz that an urban planner sent in. Oh, we're waiting for Sips to get back. Australia. Yeahralia yeah yeah i'm just gonna do the intro for it if if if it's all right we'll wait by the way this commonly happens during the podcast i don't know whether it gets cut but this commonly

happens that syps just leaves for some reason for five minutes and then comes back and so sorry sorry the bin man got stuck in my hedge or some dumb shit do you mean oh sorry sorry, the bin man got stuck in my hedge or some dumb shit. Do you mean? Oh, sorry, sorry. The builders who are doing this, the sewage line needed a cup of tea. You know, there'll be what do you think it is going to be today? So he's gonna come back. I'll do my impression of sips coming back. Okay. He's gonna go sorry, sorry, sorry. Ah, fuck me. Fuck me, dude. Fucking. Oh, this delivery guy just wouldn't fucking go away. I had to fucking deal with it. That's what he's going to do.

Just like that. Okay. Okay. I'm so excited. I want him to come back right now. And here we go. There you go. I'm back.

I'm sorry. That's it. That's it? That's it. We thought you were going to go, fuck me. Oh, man. Oh, the delivery guy. You have like a story. In my mind, I'm saying that, yeah.

Oh, okay. You can let yourself go. Just go on. Share it with us. Share it with the class. You know what? I'm so done with the whole thing. I don't even want to.

Okay. I don't even want to. I'm just so done. We won't bring it know what I'm so done with the whole thing I don't even wanna okay I don't even wanna I'm just so done we won't bring it up I'm so done alright this one is from Emma

uh you Sips and Lewis have discussed furries quite a bit have we? but you seem to be misinformed so I'm here to put that right

and answer any questions you have uh my name is Emma and I've been in the furry fandom for 10 years holy crap and i'd like to defend this wonderful community against triforce slander firstly lewis mostly seems to think that all furries obsessed are obsessed with wearing diapers maybe there

are some but in my 10 years i've never ever met anyone who likes them and i've met thousands of furries no your comments well listen i think that's uh if it's like if you have one fetish you're likely to have out of your way to ask them if they wear diapers or not so you've got the cold hard facts the crinkling yeah simon thank you um i think that's that's likely that to be the case i don't know i think it's hard i heard it was hard to get the suits off is don't know. I think it's hard. I heard it was hard to get the suits off, is what I'm saying. So, it's a little bit like you're trapped. That's not the same as saying that you think they're all wearing nappies, is it?

I'm just, you know. Maybe not like full nappies. It would make sense if they were wearing them, though, because you're not going to take- Yeah, like Lewis said, you're not going to just take the suit off and pinch a loaf, you know? So, quick question then. When you see those guys dressed up as vicky mouse at disney world and stuff are they wearing nappies yeah for sure you reckon probably got those they got like those nasa um space suit um p extract i'm sure they have yeah

all right this one secondly furries are not inherently sexual they can be but it's mainly about the fandom that would be like people assuming you like porn because you play Overwatch, as there happens to be Overwatch porn. This is definitely not my words. That would be absolutely correct. That's the thing. Wrong. I love porn and I play Overwatch.

Every furry I've met has been obsessed with yiffing. They have been yiffing each other. It's not a sex thing, furries. That is definitely not a thing um except in every every time i've experienced furries anywhere it's been a thing a big a big a big it's not a sex thing that's actually i don't know joe what sure emma maybe it's not for you if you're having um sex with another uh person and you're both in fursona, do you have to make animal noises while you're doing it?

Like, you know, if you're dressed up as like a donkey, do you have to like, you know, do the donkey sounds? Stay in full character? I don't know. I don't know. Well, any questions we have, we can direct to Emma. Maybe your furry fursona is not yiffable, Emma. i thought they had tons of sex i thought that was the whole thing

and that's my experience as well from doing events and with the furries having the con next door but maybe people at cons are more sexual than just your everyday furry industry if that's the case my number one question is why the fuck not what is the point otherwise what a waste of fucking time you're dressing up like an idiot just to what walk around together in a suit you could be having sex with each other at least i don't understand this i don't know if they're actually having like um oh my god i don't actually even know is it like the sorting hat again is, you know, they wouldn't want to actually have sex with the sorting hat? If I was invited by a sorting hat to fuck it, I might consider it.

What if he put you in... Would, afterwards, what if he was like, you're Slytherin? Well, I don't know. Oh, God. What if you, like, put... You know how stuff comes out of the Sorting Hat? Like, sometimes, like, swords and things. Like, Sorting Hat seems to keep things in it.

I don't know if you know the Harry Potter lore. What if you put the Sorting Hat on and it just, like, ran out from all these people who'd fucked it? It started leaking out of it. It just had a collection of jizz in it. Man. What a thought. Thank you very it. Man. What a thought. Thank you very much for that. You're welcome.

Yeah, thank you. I'm looking at bad dates. We ran through so many emails today because it's such a long podcast. I'm about three emails short of being prepared and no one has emailed in while we've been on air. There's been shit in chat. Listen, we don't give a shit. I'm trying to talk to the lads and read emails.

What is the email? Pyrion Flax at gmail.com. There you go. If you posted your one in chat, just send it to him now. This is a great email. You've got five minutes. Here's a subject line. He almost pretended to be dead.

Worst date, he almost pretended to be dead. Good grief. That's a power play. That's got to be a. Good grief. That's a power play. That's got to be a huge power play. Just catching up with the mailbag episodes, and here's my worst date story. I was seeing this guy, they're 24, 25, for a few months by this point and was staying in his flat. Important note, he had diabetes and was very open about it. One night as we were hanging out in bed, he suddenly stopped moving and was breathing really heavy.

He looked very pale and sweaty and asked me to go get his test kit. Is that considered brave? To be very open about your diabetes? Like when people... Excuse me, everybody! I am a diabetic! So brave.

He's so brave. I admire him so much. So brave. I'm crying. He looked very pale and sweaty and asked me to go get his test kit. Turns out he was having a hypo and his blood sugar was dangerously below what it needed to be. I went to the bathroom to get him a towel while he ate some chocolate. And when I came back, he was laughing. I asked why and he said I was going to pretend to have died.

But I couldn't stop laughing. What the fuck is wrong with people? Why would you do that to somebody? You barely know them. You're going to pretend to be dead on a date? What the fuck is wrong with people? Why would you do that to somebody? You barely know them. You're going to pretend to be dead on a date? What the fuck? Now, how long have they been together at this point? Like a couple of months.

What, living together? No, they were just like hanging out, like having sex, I guess, occasionally. I think that's actually not a date then, is it? That's just fooling around with your then-partner, I assume girlfriend or boyfriend at that point. You're not dating him. Well, I guess you are dating him, but that's not like a... I mean, that would not fly early on.

But months in, maybe you could get away with it. Two months? Judge the room, though. Oh, my God. How many dates have you gone on in two months? Unless you're seeing each other multiple times a week. Yeah week yeah anyway either way this i'm trying to make excuses for but either way this is terrible do never do this this is insane i know people that have been seeing someone for a couple of months and i definitely they definitely wouldn't describe them as their

boyfriend or girlfriend right so if i'm kind of seeing someone if you're kind of seeing someone does that mean you can just like kind of see other people as well? Like you're not, you're not like attached to this person. You're not committed. Yeah, sure. It depends on the person. Like you would have had that conversation. It depends on the conversation you've had. Exactly.

I'm just trying to explain, like to just trying to think of ways to explain to my wife. Especially with a legit health thing. That's right, Shaq. Oh my God. He's a creepy one. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know.

That's mental. Here's one. This is from Sam. On the back of the most recent mailbag, when Sips described the optician, this was in August, so this was a while ago, where Sips described the optician saying he had a beautiful eye in his test. Is that something the optician said to you? That is exactly what the optician said.

She said, that is a beautiful eye. And I said, thank you. Thanks. It reminded me of the fact that every time I go to get blood taken, the nurse always comments on the fact I have nice big veins. Yes. And that creeps Sam out, which I could kind of understand. It's like saying, what a lovely big neck you have.

I can see the veins very clearly in your neck. It's kind of an odd compliment, isn't it? It is a weird compliment. Yeah. I love the size of your veins. Well, when I had my prostate biopsy done and the guy was like, you've got a really clean back passage. I was like, thanks. Wow.

Thanks very much. It's not often you get a compliment like that from somebody. He's like, you know, it was really spacious in there. I was able to do all the work I needed to do, no problem, no obstacles or anything. Thanks. Have you had any bleaching done? Nice asshole.

Thanks, Doc. You got a real nice asshole. This asshole is sparkling clean. Nurse, get over here and look at this thing. Get the other doctors in here. Guys, look at this fucking asshole. Oh, man. That's a beauty. I could eat a sandwich off this asshole. Get the other doctors in here. Guys, look at this fucking asshole. Oh, man. That's a beauty. I could eat a sandwich off this asshole.

This is going to anger people. This is going to anger people a lot, this next email. It angered me. This is from Lacklin. Is this one of those heavily toned ones where it's like you're a fucking idiot because you said something that only I would know about because I'm a professional in the field. You had no chance of ever knowing about it in a million years because you don't study the same stuff I study, but I'm just going to sit here and be really condescending to you for two minutes on my email. No, it's even worse than that. All right. You guys, I think this is going to anger all of us and probably everyone in chat as well. You may not be aware. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry if I shatter the glass,

but you're all pronouncing Maltesers wrong. It's not Maltesers. It's Maltesers. What? This was a polite public service announcement. Not a slag. You guys always make my week and I wish you all the best.

Love, Lachlan Maltesers yeah pretty bad so that is definitely an unpopular opinion according to Jack who are furious

and then I guess we haven't got too long left here so this is from Jacob. I have a small story and a question. It's a combo with my diary. Creme egg as well. It's pronounced creme egg. Egg de la creme.

Oeuf de creme, s'il vous plaît, monsieur. Oeuf de creme. I have a small story and a question for Sips and Lewis. In episode 153, Snooper Elite, you guys were talking about how female Twitch streamers receive a lot more inappropriate comments in their chat than you guys do. At the time, I was not much of a Twitch user, so not very exposed to this creepy culture,

but I was not surprised that it happens. After hearing the important part of your conversation, Sips made a comment that he'd been streaming for 10 years, and he's never once had a comment that says, I want to suffocate you in my giant tits. No. And I would remember still remember still waiting i want to crush you in my big thighs so i found this hilarious as did you guys in fact yeah

inexperienced twitchies that i was i decided that i'd go to your twitch channel and comment this straight away this was my twitch channel you had clearly forgotten what sips had said and i immediately got banned apirian does ban people i i do i do not ban people personally i think other people do it for me though right i will fucking get my hands dirty all right so they needless to say i felt like a bit of an idiot i've recently been watching the scrub cast on youtube i would like to um get back to watching the stream but they can't because they're banned. My question to all of you, but mainly to Simpson Lewis, do you guys think I deserve to be unbanned? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Sure. I don't think you should be banned in the first place. Not for joking around, but also,

if somebody came to my chat and was like, I just want to get my gigantic tits out and suffocate you, I want to put your face in between my big titties and i want to i i want to draw every last breath out of you and uh and you pass away between my big my big boobies my huge honkers i would mod you there you go just give the give them the. It's yours now. Yeah, it's yours. Your sips now. Take over. Someone can pop that in his little copy,

pass her in sips to chat. I'm sure he will love to hear it. Make sure if you donate, put that, the exact transcript of that. There you go. Get it in there. It's weird though, right?

Because like, I'm sure that, I'm sure that people, I'm sure that females receive messages from people all the time saying, I want you to choke on my wiener or whatever. But I never get messages. All right. Yeah.

Well, there we go. That's enough. That's just end of that. Thank you, everyone. I'm not unbanning because the lad didn't even bother including his fucking name you have to unban him well he didn't even supply his name so I can't he can reply to the email

well just unban somebody random and hope for the best no way man some of them are banned for a very good reason everyone we loved you thank you this was nice doing it live isn't it it's basically the same shit I get to see your beautiful faces when we're doing it. Um, yeah.

Thank you everyone for joining us for this one. Stay tuned for more podcasts. P-Flex is going to be on the next one in four minutes. So, so, so we better go so they can get set up. All right. Thank you everyone. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.