Triforce! - Triforce! Mailbag Special #43: "Normal" people among us

Episode Date: January 1, 2025

Triforce Mailbag Special 43! King Charles is just like us, he's a regular human being! We also have mail about listening at 1.5x speed, fake Wikipedia articles, Logo design and the Triforce Underrated Jokes Quiz! Support your favourite podcast on Patreon: https://bit.ly/2SMnzk6 Music courtesy of Epidemic Sound. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickaxe. Exclude delivery. The mailbag, the mailbag. It's here upon us once more. The mailbag returns once again. Once again. That was the catchiest one. Oh, you reckon? Not AI generated, at was the catchiest one. Are you reckon? Not AI generated, at least you don't think. Yeah, I had a lad ask me why I hadn't used his jingle, which was not AI generated.

He emailed in a couple of times about it. I think I saw a comment on YouTube where he was like, yeah, I sent in a song and they didn't use it. It wasn't AI generated. And he said the same thing in his email to me just just the other day. Why didn't you use my song? I didn't use your song because there's no words in it. It's not funny. It's incredibly loud guitar distortion for a minute.

You know, just imagine that. Everybody imagine that along vaguely the tune of the Mayo bag. Just consider that there was a guy who said one in that was like, are you ready to shit? Right. Exactly. Like Like that one made it. Like that's because that's terrible. Like that was terrible. And that's why I played it. Because it's so bad it's funny. If it's just a perfectly acceptable guitar fuzz, no words song. Listen, you can't land in the middle ground. You have to be either noticeably good or noticeably

bad. Exactly right. That's how you stand out. You don't want to be forgettably average. Exactly. No one remembers the average man. Look at Ben. So, all right, let's start off with a very simple one. This is covering some old ground that we must have mentioned these things in the course of the various podcasts and people are looking for clarification. This is from Gregor, I just want to know why all of you hate Coldplay so much. Leave my favourite band alone, thanks.

Why do we hate Coldplay? Why we hate Coldplay so much? It's, do you know what? Stop living in the 90s. I don't, I don't hate them. I don't hate them passionately, I just don't appreciate them either. They're just not for me. I don't hate them.

I don't hate them. I think, you know, fine. Go for it. If it's all yellow or whatever, have fun. But for me, it's not yellow. I just find them boring. I find them really boring. Sorry. You can say that about my favorite band as well if you want, we can have that fight. I find them really boring. Sorry.

You can say that about my favourite band as well if you want, we can have that fight. I don't mind. I'm just, for me it's not, they're just too boring. It's exactly the same. They're playing it safe in the middle of the road with average, to pop songs that hit a large demographic of people. That's the thing. Because it has to appeal to so many people, that makes it bland.

Yeah. Sorry. I respect your choice. If that's your favourite band, that's great. And there's nothing wrong with it. I'm glad you have a favourite one. There's nothing wrong with it. That's very sweet. I will play the bad guy here and say, I do fucking hate Coldplay, and if they're your favourite band, I think it's kind of sad. And what upsets me is when you see a concert and all these people with their eyes closed

and their arms in the air, like, they're listening to the word of God, and it's just the most middle of the road music imaginable. ALICE It really is. It is modern day easy listening. Which again, it needs an audience, and demands quite a big audience. Easy listening's always been. I will say that there is a lot of joy to be had in that kind of community event though. It's like, you know, people support mid-football teams, you know, and they get a lot of joy

out of those. You know, you're welcome to support. Yeah, but no, no, no. That doesn't track at all. I think also, like, you know... Wait, can I say why? Go on. Here's the reason. When you support a middling or shit football team, a lot of it is suffering.

You are, you are forced to support that team because you have chosen them and you're loyal and you're supporting this dog shit team playing terrible football. And you go week in week out. And most of the time it's shit. That is not the same as when you're like, co-player the best. You're like, look at the stars, see how they shine for you. You're like, oh, this is so wonderful and moving. Oh, you're amazing, Chris. Keep singing it.

I love the way the guitar parts in every song are the fucking same. The rest of the band, you could swap in and out. They may as well be the animatronic band at fucking Chuck E. G's. They're so faceless. And Chris, whatever the fuck his name is, you know, what's his name? Chris Martin. That's actually his full legal name.

Chris whatever the fuck his name is Martin. Just the blandest dude. You can go over to his house. He's like, oh hi, I've got a cup of homemade... If he turned up, I'd be like, oh, I didn't order somebody in to install new windows. Have a smoothie. I grounded myself order somebody into a install new windows. Yeah. Have a, have a smoothie. I grounded myself this morning from things from my garden. Fuck off and give me a pint. What's wrong with you? Come on.

Yeah, you're right. That's the vibe. But that is the vibe. The thing is, it's just an age old thing. Like your favorite band sucks. My favorite band is better than your favorite band. I got better taste in music than you. There's a lot of like elitism around

music and genres and stuff like that as well. But I always just think like there's bands like Coldplay, like these big sort of like mass appeal mainstream bands and you just think there's other music out there. There's other music. There's other people out there that are more interesting and there's better stuff to listen to. They're the basic ham sandwich of music. It's fine, but I don't make out this is the best sandwich ever. No. I think that's the thing that bugs me when people are going on about them. You just think, you can't sell this to me. I know what it is. The same way I would never be able to sell you, you know, 12 albums of Dragonforce or whatever I like. I don't like that by the way. You know what I mean?

Uh oh. Here come the Dragonforce emails. It's a weird one. Well, I don't know. I'm sure this chat also likes other people and has had some positive experiences with this public. No, he said there's a subscript, people and has had some positive experiences with Coldplay. He said, there's a subscript, sub-PS, this is the only thing I like and I don't like anything else regardless of what Lewis says, he's just written that at the bottom there.

Yeah, he'll only listen to Coldplay. What about, what's the other one, Snow Patrol? PPS, I also love Snow Patrol, but not as PPS. Snow Patrol are basically Coldplay in disguise. Their songs sound like a watery, dribbly piss. More like Snooze Patrol. Oh my god, man, they are the worst. Alright, this is left to more housekeeping.

Gordon playing footy. Hello, you mentioned Gordon Ramsay playing football. I'm emailing to tell you that my dad used to play football with him when he was in school and was part of the same friend group that he was in. He also allegedly had a massive crush on a girl in their year, but never got to seal the deal with her and she ended up marrying a brickie. She must be absolutely regretting her prior life choices. Cheers, Josh.

P.S. Tell Lewis that when I see him in Bristol next, I will be the one telling him he has a tiny penis. Good heavens. Whoa. A bit threatening there, Josh. That's a bit threatening. Calm down. I have a tiny penis. Good heavens. Whoa. A bit threatening there, Josh. That's a bit threatening. Calm down. Okay. I have a tiny penis. Good. We did have a talk about Gordon Ramsay in a long

time, so you must be very behind on the podcast, but thanks for checking in, friend. We could do a big ups this week to GR if you want. Gordon, I didn't know. No? I don't think he's ever been the target of a big up, so... I don't think he deserves it. Wow. Is he alright? I'd rather give one to Marco Pierre White, whose videos I've been watching on YouTube. And he has a very distinct way of doing his videos. He'll be cooking a fried egg.

I heard he was an absolute cunt. Oh no, he is. But he's like an evil villain who has a cooking show. So he's like, hello, I'm Marco P. White. Today, I'm going to be doing one of the simplest dishes, one of the most simplest it gets a fried egg. And he'll hold up the egg and he'll look you dead in the eye. Look, the camera did in the egg is egg is the staple of a fried egg.

That's all there is to it. Time. You have to take time and cook the egg. If you don't cook the egg right. What's the point in even being alive? Take the egg and you cook it and then you'll crack the egg. We cracked the egg. It sounds just like Gordon Ramsay. This is what Gordon.

But I guess Gordon's more bravado. But did this guy's more like how dare you? Yeah, yeah. But Marka Pia White's like, I think his ego is is insane, like in a different way. Like he's retired, but he will like crack the egg and he'll be in the middle of doing it. And then it will stop and say, we always apply the pepper with our left hand grinding it to the right. Never right grinding it to the left. That would be foolish. We must take time to do it properly. And he's like,

everything's bubbling away. I've got some wisdom. I've got some wisdom. Hold on. And he'll do this deep voice kind of almost like a threat telling you, take your time, not too much butter and never apply the salt first. And I look at you, he'll pause. I feel very uncomfortable. That's what he's like. You watch the vids. You watch the vids. It's honestly, it's creepy. I would not be able to be around somebody who spoke like that all the time.

That's not. And to me as well. I would just say, listen, buddy, you're just going to have to speak. If you're trying to tell me something, do it in a normal, normal voice, in a normal tone or a done. I can't keep up with this. Well, you can see why he didn't like the it's not like people see him as like a big TV chef, because his style is like this is a guy who's a chef. He's only go entertainer or anything like that.

And he's obviously extremely successful. So he takes it incredibly seriously. I don't think he has an ounce of sort of, what's the opposite of it. No joy and no self-deprecation. Yeah. Yeah. And I feel like a lot of Ramsey's thing was that, that angry, I feel like Ramsey sometimes puts it on. Oh, you reckon? He must do. Yeah. You're crazy. I think it's a hundred percent genuine. But I think Marco Pio White never has to.

I think it's just natural. He just is. Alright, here's a question. Is King Charles out of touch? It's more of a lose news kind of thing, but I just want to make sure that we as an audience got your specific take on it. And here's the headline. King Charles did not know what cling film was and shrieked the first time he saw it.

Wow. Okay. King Charles III had no idea what cling film was and shrieked the first time he saw it. Wow. OK. King Charles III had no idea what cling film was and shrieked the first time he saw an author has claimed in an unauthorized biography, which details a selection of interesting stories. This whole thing where people that the tabloids in the papers always try to do this, they always try to make you think that these these people who might as well just not live on this planet

live exactly like you and me, you know? Yeah. Oh, Kate and William just got back from a busy day of work and Kate's got the cling film out and she's, you know, wrapping up some brownies that Prince George made. They don't live like that at all. They probably don't know what half of this shit is cause they don't need to know what this shit is.

They just have other stuff to do and all of the little stuff that we get hung up on, they have other people to do it for them. They are so fucking insanely rich and privileged. They just don't need to know any of this shit. He's never had to put a bit of cling over some old sandwiches. It does not surprise me in the slightest that he doesn't know what cling film is. Add that to the list of all the other common shit that he probably has no idea about as well.

This guy has never lived in a house that has less than a hundred rooms. Like he's, you know what I mean? It should not be a surprise that these people are out of touch. They are out of touch. They have no hope of ever being even remotely in touch. It's all, to them, it's just like,

we have to appeal to them somehow, what kind of stuff do all of those garbage people do? What, cling film? Yeah, get me some. You know, like, they don't care. And they don't really need to either. Like, it's just, they live in a completely different universe. I think part of it though is the nature of what they do. It's the hunger of the press

for getting stories on them and finding out which makes them more isolated. It's the fact that they're terrified of making these faux pas and boo-boos that again makes them more isolated. And they're surrounded by people who are sycophants who speak in the way they do. And you know, the people, the children of the... there's enough royal relations all swirling around, you know, with country estates who are wannabe royals. And you know, you see them all the time. You can spend your entire life associating with people who speak in received pronunciation. You never need to associate with normal people.

You've got, there's an infinite amount of, of, of toadies, right? So I think that it's by their very nature. And also in a sense, like this weird thing keeps them royal, right? Like if they spoke, I think some of the other Royals in other countries don't feel as royal, because they are more in touch, they've tried to make themselves more normal and approachable with the common man, and that's not what royalty is. Royalty is chosen by God, right? They have to be apart from us. They have to be special, unique, untouchable, different. And they're a completely different class as well.

It adds to their allure, right? As well. think- We see them as different when we're supposed to. As much as we want to think that he goes to Pizza Express and goes to the bookies and stuff on the way home from work or whatever, he doesn't. I think that's Prince Andrew, isn't it? Yeah, but Prince Andrew's, you know- The Pizza Express? He's, he's, yeah. Wait, do you go to Pizza Express and then hit the bookies on the way back from work?

I don't know. I see, again, I'm in a completely different class as well, I'm kind of out of touch. Garage class. But, you know what I mean? I think part of what keeps them in where they are, their position, is that they're so different. Yeah, the detachment is key, like Louis Sturridge. To everyone else. that they're so different to everyone else. The Peter Express thing felt wrong because you don't want to see a prince in a Peter

Express. He tried to make himself human. I don't think he ever might in one though. They try to appeal to people, and they'll say these things, but like, I don't think... Even they used to say, oh, Diane, I wanted to keep William and Harry, you know, like less stuffy, more, more modern. So she let them go to McDonald's and stuff like that. Yeah, okay.

She probably did once, you know, but like they're not going to McDonald's after school every day. Those guys, you know what I mean? It's crazy if you think that they live anything resembling a normal life. I mean, they closed down the McDonald's to get them in, I'm sure. They're not allowed to, you know, you wouldn't just have them queuing up. No, of course not. So they'll have the filet-o-fish.

Oh, father, no one has the filet-o-fish. I don't even know what it is. What is a fish? It's a weird push and pull with the public. The public need them to be relatable and accessible, but they're not. At all. You know. But there's just this desire for them to be. But they are not at all.

We don't want to be led by one of us. You're gonna get emails now from somebody who says, Hey, I was down at the chip shop and I saw William there with blah blah blah, and they are accessible, I don't know what you're talking about. I guarantee we won't. We want to be led by someone superior. We want to be picked. True.

You know, British people want someone smart and well-spoken to be in charge of important decisions. You know. Someone who looks like they've had some schooling. That's how Jacob Rees-Mogg was able to be a fucking MP for so long. It's like, this guy's obviously a cunt and you're all voting for him. Oh, he's so on the earth, Jacob Rees-Mogg. No, he's fucking not.

He's a cunt. Nanny. I knew someone to wipe my body. Nanny, I miss my schooling. Schooling. Yeah, it's a weird one. But yeah, he is out of touch and he will always he will always just be out of touch.

I think it's a given that he's... It's by his very nature. And in a sense, sense, if they're smarter than we give them credit for, they would lean into it as well. Because it keeps them in that sort of touristy, elevated, safe place. It's a constitutional model. He has no power. And he has said that. I mean, they're talking about Australia doing this thing where he's doing a tour of Australia at the moment, and there's certain people, certain groups who love having the king, and they've asked him, you know, do you think that Australia should still have a king? And he said, well that's up to the people to decide, because it is. He's not allowed an opinion, right? He's a toothless figurehead. And that's what the Queen was. And she pivoted her role

really to being a peacemaker or a peace broker or a community builder. Trying to bring together these disparate countries. And dance act. In the later years she did a lot of dancing. She'd open everything with a big ol' bit of breaking. I think you're getting confused with the other Australian. No, I think I am getting confused with the other Australian ray gun. Yeah. Well that was Her Majesty's, she trained ray gun up.

Did she? That's why that was what all this controversy was, is they thought she'd got that royal approval to get in, and that's how she got in. It was all the Queen, and then King Charles took it over. Anyway, I've said too much. Did you hear that Boris put out an autobiography, his memoir, he was paid two million for it. Amazing. It sold 40,000 copies in the first week.

Which is about, it's not great, but it's not bad either. Like, it's average. I think Margaret Thatcher did 100,000 in her first week. Blair did like 50,000. I think Liz Trust did like 1,000 in her first week. It was a disaster. But Boris has done okay. But he was paid well for it, and people love Boris, it's only a

matter of time before he's all over the place. He's like our Donald Trump. Maybe one person loves Boris. Maybe all the people have voted for him and said we need Boris. Yeah, like half of the country. There's no way. It's the same thing as, it's the same thing you say, name someone who likes Trump, half of America.

Like literally half. But anyway, Boris put out his memoir and it's done okay. And one of the things he said was that the Queen died of bone cancer, rather than old age. Because obviously the royal family would much rather have old age written on the death certificate. Even though no one dies of old age anymore, really. Everyone dies of something. Old age is a kind of a very out of date. Something goes, doesn't it? But I understand it's more respectful to say, to keep it quiet and to keep it private, right?

And so it does feel scummy for Boris to come out and, I don't know... To shift a few books. Does it feel out of character? No. Exactly. That's exactly the kind of shit he'd do. Anyway, alright, let's move on. That's why people love him so much.

This is about the Wikipedia editing. Do you remember I talked about the Wikipedia editing that one of the merch guys did at TI for the Copenhagen... Sure, yeah. They did some vandalism, but it was funny vandalism. Yeah, indeed. So, about five years ago, a friend thought it would be funny to edit my hometown's Wikipedia page to say that I was the mayor. I expected to get changed back after a few weeks at most. For reference, my hometown is in the Midwest U.S. with a population of around 40,000. It ended up staying for much longer than I expected. After about three months, if you googled mayor of hometown, my name would pop up as the answer.

If you asked Alexa who the mayor of my hometown was, she would say it was me. I guess because Google and Amazon pull that info directly off of Wikipedia. People outside my friend group started to notice and I had people I hadn't heard from in ages asking why I'd run for mayor. About six months after I first changed the Wikipedia page,

this is to change it back, the actual mayor found out and sent me a message about it on Facebook. We'd never met and we're not Facebook friends or anything. He just found my account somehow. He was a good sport about it and realized we were just some guys trying to have a laugh. The mayor then created a Wikipedia account with his real name, let's say Dave Smith, and changed the page back.

This apparently set off a red flag at Wikipedia because to them, it looked like some guy named Dave Smith just created an account to vandalize this page and say he was the mayor. So Wikipedia reverted his change. So I was once again the mayor and they also banned his account. No, I realized what happened. I changed the Wikipedia page myself to the correct mayor, mostly because the joke had run its course and I didn't want the mayor thinking I was conspiring against him

to keep him off Wikipedia. Oh, man. Imagine they thought that there was a conspiracy and they were trying to hunt you down. Like a dog destroy you for getting in the way of their Wikipedia updates. Oh my god man. This is very common, and I imagine it happens all the time. And yeah, like these bits of disinformation make it through, right? This is how you write history. You know, you're write history. If you're the one who writes it down and no one else does, everyone forgets it. It makes you wonder how much of history is real. Will Barron Well, this is funny. I read an interesting

r-slash-history post recently. The question was, why did the Romans not basically erase Carthage from history? Because obviously we know that the Romans rewrote quite a lot of history in their favor because they had, there was an empire and they had to maintain a certain level of sort of, you know, we're the best. Otherwise, it's hard to keep people on board with the whole, we're going to conquer the world thing. But Carthage and Hannibal, that was a big fucking deal for the Romans.

And you know, Hannibal got into Rome Rome like they were stomping about having battles in Rome. And the thing is, the Romans basically started that war by fucking around in Sicily, which at that time was not part of Italy. It was like, you know, they were fucking around there and then all the rest of what is now Sicily. And they basically goaded the Carthaginians into this war and they had this big fight. But they didn't change the history because defeating this big bad enemy made them look good even if they started it. They kind of that was a minor footnote. The main thing was he fucking turned up in Rome like we are having to fight this guy in our home turf. So it's super important that we beat him and aren't we fabulous for doing it. So sometimes

even just keeping history the way it was, but changing a couple of minor details completely changes the way the story plays out. So imagine if, for example, D-Day had been a failure, but we'd pushed Germany back into Germany, then they'd fall all the way back and won. They might leave out of the history the fact that this was all they're fucking doing anyway. They might just say, look at this, the evil Americans turned up and stomped all over France and Germany and we had to beat them back and we were victorious. So even though that did, you know, the America did invade France and did push Germany all the way back into Germany, you could easily change the take on that by just changing a

couple of minor details early on. So I don't think that history needs rewriting that much. You just need to change a couple of key points, let the facts play out. ALICE Well, I think it's almost nice that Hitler was such a kind of cut and dry bad guy. RIght. ALICE Yeah, that is nice. RIght. We won, so we can say that. ALICE That is really good.

ALICE I think there isn't one for World War I though, right? Like the Kaiser being in charge of Germany during that time. ALICE Kaiser von Wilhelm. Was he Kaiser... Wilhelm's the second. Kaiser Wilhelm the second. The former German Emperor. Until his abdication in 1918, which marked the end of the German Empire. I don't know, was he a bad guy? Well exactly. Like he's not villainised in the way that we see other people. ALICE I mean, he abdicated. I would say... I mean, he didn't do any that I can tell.

I'm on Wikipedia, so maybe there's some information missing or whatever. ALICE Will Hill was actually the mayor of a small town. ALICE I'm not sure that he did a huge genocide or anything like that, from what I can tell. He did kind of hand over the country to the military though, for World War I. He just sort of said, I don't know what I'm doing. Military command, can you please take over? And they ran the country as a military dictatorship for the entirety of World War I. Much the way King Charles would do it. And they ran the country as a military dictatorship for the entire world war one.

King Charles would do anything about armies or cling film. Oh, by the way, happy birthday Lulu. When's it your birthday? It's next week, right? Yeah. Four days of time of recording, but this is a mail bag, remember? So this is a backup episode. Happy birthday.

Yeah. If it's your birthday, it's your birthday. Yeah. Oh doesn't matter. Happy birthday. If it's your birthday, it's your birthday. Oh, well thank you guys. Your birthday is around the same time as Mrs S birthday. That's funny. I got her a present, I didn't get you shit. I'm sorry, bud. Alright, how does the guy got you anything?

This one's called, speeding up your media. This is from Cameron. This is probably the most uninteresting email I could send as my first message. After listening since the beginning. But here we go. But bear with me because I like this. I listened to the Triforce through Spotify along with all of my other podcasts. And at some point, I made a change from listening at normal speed to 1.2 times speed. Sure. I think this was from listening to some nonfiction and getting annoyed when they'd explained concepts I'd already explained in episodes prior. We can relate to that.

Yes. Eventually over time this increased to 1.5 speed and now we listen to all podcasts like this and have done for years. Right. I had a strange experience today listening to the 2024 Pickaxe Week episode, which of course was at normal speed. And honestly, at first I thought you were all ill or putting on weird voices because I've gotten so used to hearing you at 1.5 times speed to the point that it really

felt weird in an uncanny valley type of way. After this, I had to think and realized I really do this sort of thing with a lot of other media. For example, if a TV show is based on a book or graphic novel or comic, I'll just go and read that rather than watch the show because it's quicker. Same with a lot of movies. I can't bring myself to listen to audiobooks because in my mind I just know I can just read the book faster. In more modern times, I've noticed that for work, I've got to check some technical manual. If it's a big wall of text, I'll just paste it into chat GPT and have it summarize it for me. Do you guys do anything like this or have I just gone completely crazy and fucked my brain?

I personally I don't do anything like that, but I know lots of people who do. Yeah. And I think I think it's become kind of a norm for a lot of people. I'm a little bit older and probably wouldn't ever have the need to do that, personally. If I even bother to watch or listen to something, my attention span is like fucking awful. Like I'll watch something for like two minutes and then I'm just like, nah. Give up. I'm done. I absolutely do what you're saying.

And I worry about it too, because I have to check through these Blood in the Clock Tower videos that I've been in before, and I watched them at two times speed. I listen to podcasts at 1.5 speed usually. I watched a lot of stuff, even like Netflix, I watched a lot of that at like one and a half speed, just because it was like, because you can. And I feel like I watched a lot of stuff. I think it's, there's a lot of stuff that's quite slow, especially podcasts and things like this that are more considered. This is one YouTuber. You watched one, uh, sped up?

Oh, this guy's really good at talking. Look at him go! Oh my god, this guy is going crazy! Look at her suck that cock! Look at that thrust thing! Think Look at her suck that cock. Look at that disgusting. Think of her neck muscles. My God. I don't know why Jerry Seinfeld's watching. Look at her neck muscles.

George. So, so there is this one YouTuber, I had this exact experience, this was a YouTuber who spoke so slowly that I was, I used to watch him at two times speed and I watched a bunch of his stuff and then I sort of, I can't remember what I was doing, but I was watching it live or something where I couldn't speed it up. And I could not watch it. I could not watch it. Because it was like, this guy who I was used to, you know, giving these like very high speed instructional, you know, useful things, became this like super slow, sluggish, like almost like a stoner. It was

strange. It was like we were ill, he was ill, and I get that completely. I think it's hard to get the right... I think we can ingest information a lot quicker than we can give it. So I think the nature of this podcast is that we play at the natural speed, but I think that it is more comfortable to listen to it faster. So yeah, maybe check it out guys. Maybe we're much better, a more interesting, faster. I know a friend of mine does that with everything is two speed, everything. Everybody just sounds like the chipmunks though, right? Well, so he puts a subtitle on, you watch a film at two times speed with the subtitles on and just burn through it.

And I think if you boil, if you're looking to get information, I think that's fine. Because if I could read a manual or instructions twice as fast and absorb that information, fantastic. And now I know what I need to do. And that's that. But if it's music or a podcast where there's a lot of character to it and you want to listen to the delivery is very important for a lot of things or a movie or something like that, to the delivery is very important for a lot of things or a movie or something like that or an audio book. To speed it up, I think, is to just say, just smash the information into my brain and leave any art out of it.

Like, I don't want anything to do with delivery or acting. Just smash the story straight into my brain. Well, at that point, just read the part summary on Wikipedia and don't bother watching it. That's the quickest way to absorb the film. You can say, oh, yeah, I watched all of the rings uh they get that ring and they blow it up in mount doom don't they job done i've saved nine hours is it secret is it safe it just goes like yeah it turns out it's secret and safe and they did it job done i mean it's just like i think it's totally right

hey if that's the way you enjoy it fair enough i'm just saying i don't fucking relate at all yeah i can't relate either i would i would would not speed something up or even really skip through stuff. You know, even if I'm hate watching something, I rarely skip through it. I think, oh, I'm I'm in now. So, you know, I'm just watching the whole thing or not. You know, like I wouldn't I wouldn't bother to speed something up, though. I did notice like it maybe it's a generational thing. I don't know, but my son, if he's watching something,

it say he's watching something on Netflix or Disney plus or whatever. Uh, he constantly checks to see how much time is left, which again, I think it's a generational thing. Cause I never checked to see how much time is left on something. Interesting. I kind of have a sense for, you know, if I, because I never check to see how much time is left on something. I kind of have a sense for, you know, if I look to see what I'm watching and it says that it's an hour long, you know, I'm just like, okay, well, it's an hour. Yeah, yeah. But like, he'll check.

He checks and checks like every couple of minutes. That's one of the weird things I quite like about audiobooks and Kindle reading on my iPad or whatever it's called. You don't know when the end's coming. Reading a normal book or watching a movie, you've got a feeling it's like, okay, this is the last bit. Whereas like sometimes, and that kind of sometimes can spoil it, right? Sometimes it's like, okay, this must be the solution or, you know, this is the, okay, it's the final. It's the sadness of ending a book. Yeah, I hate it. I hate it. All right, this is the, okay. They've it's, it's, it's, it's the sadness of ending a book.

Yeah. I hate it. Yeah. All right. This one's, this one's called accidental swastikas. Right. Okay. This goes back.

We were talking about Hitler a moment ago, a staple subject here on the podcast. It's inevitable. Greg Wallace and Hitler. We talk about a lot anyway. Uh, this is, you've never seen either of them in the same room together though. Correct. Right. This is from Michael. And now I was, I wasn't originally going to read this out because I thought it was, you know, it's okay. Um, but then very cleverly, Michael,

uh, bumped the email in quite a subtle way. And I thought I respect the hustle. Um, send me the email a week ago. I didn't, didn't do anything with it. And now it's followed up with, I may have sent this to the wrong email address because I did not include the dot. Now, Michael, I'm sure you know as well as I do that you do not need to put the dot in Gmail email address. You could put a dot between every letter

or no dots at all, and it would still go through. You know that, Michael, but I respect the hustle. You bump the email in a smart way. Please don't let anyone else attempt this. Longtime Canadian listener here from Ontario. Wow.

Cornwall? I was listening to episode 277. At around the 38 minute mark, Lewis starts talking about logo design and he calls you Chris here. Chris remarked, I wonder if the guy who made this logo was sitting his desk one day and coming up with this logo and thought, I hope I'm not plagiarizing or copying someone's work here. When I heard this, I just had to chime in. I'm a graphic designer, and through my three year programme in college we had to make a lot of logos to experiment with different forms. This never happened to me specifically, but I can remember it happening a few times in various classes that someone would be working on a logo and not realise it resembled a swastika until someone else looked at it. It's much more common than you think to accidentally plagiarise and imitate without any intent to

do so. Awkward to accidentally comeiarise and imitate without any intent to do so. Awkward to accidentally come up with a swastika though. Well, this is one of those things though that you find yourself accidentally googling. Googling? Doodling? Doodling? Do you find yourself accidentally doodling swastikas very often, Lewis Brindley of the Yogscast?

I do, sometimes. Really? Yeah. Like, I think it's a very symmetrical shape and it's very easy to accidentally... I think when you make a logo you want it to be rotationally symmetrical or at least look nice in some way. I think it has to be something that's... I was watching the Alien Romulus the other day.

Oh, is that good? No. It is good. No, I was watching the alien Romulus the other day. Oh, is that good? And it is good. No, I'm just kidding. Yes, it is. The word alien is just like five vertical lines, but the ones at the edge, it's sort of slightly tapers. I don't know. It's just a really well-designed logo of five verticals. It looks like the word alien and you're like, oh, how does that work? And so stuff like this, right?

You're looking for to hide as much information in something which looks simple, right? It's hiding depth in simplicity. And I think the swastika is very easy. And again, it's the same thing with dicks, I imagine. It's like a lot of people design a thing and it's like, oh, that looks a bit like a dick now. Or is that just me doing a weird input test? The swastika is used in other religions and stuff though.

The other way around it is. Oh, it's the other way around, right. I talked about this in a previous episode. There's a place near me called Delhiwala that does Indian food, vegetarian Indian food, mainly like pakora and samosa and stuff like that. It's amazing. But there's some kind of holiday that they celebrate and might be a Hindu holiday that has a lot of swastikas involved, but it's not the swastikas the other

way around. So in most of the world, that symbol is just like good luck or something or prosperity. Yeah. But to walk in there and be confronted with a wall of at first glance what looked like swastikas was alarming. I'll say that because it's obviously in the West, it's such a big thing in our history and, you know, in our cultural history. But to see it is still quite shocking. So to me, to the idea that I could just accidentally doodle a swastika is quite funny. I guess I'd probably notice. But in much of the world, I think Buddhism as well, it's like it's just a regular symbol.

That's why people love to fucking boss you around stuff and then claim that. But it's like, come on, dude. It's like, yes, I'm sure it does have other meanings, but you're in London. Like, you know what it means in London anyway. Yeah. Talking of logos. So looking at a list of some of the best logos ever designed, talking about symmetry, I think symmetry definitely plays a part. But there's something else going on. It's simplicity, but also it's just,

it's just, it's very easy on the eyes. So look at the, look at this, uh, these logos here that I, that I've put down. Some of them are just the word I'll put this in discord. There we go. Shell Levi's obviously McDonald's, Mercedes, Playboy, Nike. I love New York, Starbucks. The one with the arrows is the underground London? British Rail. Or British Rail, okay.

IBM, obviously. The U, I'm not sure. I thought that might be Unilever, but I'm not sure. Okay. The Panda is WWF. Yeah. I'm not sure what the swirly things. Don't know the next one.

Might be an American one. CBS, obviously. And then Coca-F. Yeah. I'm not sure what the next one's going to be in America. Yes, obviously. And then and then Coca-Cola. So the thing is with these logos is that you can't imagine any of these not being famous logos, the two of them aside, we didn't recognize them. They might be American specific. But the point is, if you think about it, how much of the potency of a brand comes down to a good logo? I think if McDonald's hadn't had the the big M, would it have been as successful?

It's hard to say. Disney's logo is pretty iconic. Apple's logo. Yeah. Like these are all iconic, but are they iconic because the brand is huge? Or are they iconic on their own merit? Yeah, it's weird because I mean, like some of them you look at, like the Coca-Cola logo, I mean, it's obviously ingrained in everybody's minds, this logo, you've seen it everywhere sort of thing. But to look at it, it's just like, it's not, it's not much to write home about, is it? Yeah.

If it wasn't a massive brand and you saw that, you wouldn't think anything of it. So my question is, when you look at Google's logo, for example, which is a it's a good logo, it's just the word Google in different colors. Yeah. But it looks like a placeholder logo, but it works. It's weird. If you look at Ask Jeeves, Ask Jeeves had a pretty good fucking logo. What about the Yahoo logo? That was awesome.

With the comic writing. Yeah, I think quite often it's easy to say these are the best logos and they all happen to be enormous companies. Like, there are plenty of successful companies out there, massive companies, whose logo is dog shit, I'm sure. So I'm not sure I'd buy the idea that just saying, these are these, look at these logos, these brands are amazing. And it's because of the logo.

I don't know. I think that big companies are likely to have good logos because they can afford to spend all the money on them. But Wendy's logo is pretty fucking good, just the girl with the braids, that's quite iconic. But yeah, anyway. ALICE What about Burger King, Home of the Whopper? ALICE There is a famous, there's a couple of famous brand designers who've designed...

I think Raymond Lowey, whatever Lowey, he made the Coca-Cola one, and a bunch of others, like the Shell one and stuff. And his design philosophy has been taken on over the years, of keeping it a simple shape that has double meaning. I mean, the Mercedes logo is iconic, but it's really bad, really, isn't it? It's just a circle with the fucking star in it. It's true. The precision car. Maybe, okay, now I'm looking at it. I'm like, oh, maybe there's a more depth to this I can see. Oh my God. It's unraveling before my very eyes. No, it's just a simple logo. It's really, it's really quite basic. But I mean, again, it's like super iconic, right? I mean, the McDonald's one as well. I don't know.

All right. So this is a, this is a follow-up. I'm only gonna read one. This is about the deaf defining space. Do you remember the shed, the garden, the room, all that stuff? Oh God, yeah. So had a lot of people. Oh God. Had one guy saying,

I don't think that your friends have put much thought into this at all. It seems like something they came up with when they were just high or sitting around talking. Yeah, yeah, no shit. That's the whole point. It was just a joke. Like calm down. We don't need actual definitions. One guy who actually does deal with spaces for a living and was quite triggered by the shittiness of the thesis. It was just a joke, guys. I apologize. To sum it up, this is from Marco.

I've listened to your discussions on spaces and noted your request for thoughts. Here are mine. Please do not discuss the moronic ramblings of the readers in the next mailbag. It's going to be painful to listen to and much as I see that your friends have put thought into their thesis, I wish they hadn't. I'm with Sips. I couldn't stand the segment. It reminded me of something you'd find on r slash quirky, assuming such a subreddit exists. It might. From a disgruntled reader. P.S. If I met these friends, I'd ask them to shove their paper into their cavernous shed of their anus. So there you go.

Yeah. The house sandwich nonsense is kind of, this guy did a comment. He said, this is my favorite sort of low stakes debate slash forum, a Socratic method for the most banal topics. There you go. That kind of sums it up for me. It's like, it's just, it was just a bit of fun. Yeah. An excuse to try and, it's a little thought, a little thought problem that you know, that, that you can argue about and you get, it's complicated because, you know, we

have to try and explain what we mean with lots and lots of examples, lots and lots of different words. And yeah, it's just a bit of fun. Just a bit of fun everyone. Because I mean, Zach here is sent in a huge response that breaks it all down. Zach, I'm sorry. We've had the final word on it now and it was, please never speak of this again. I'm really sorry. Sorry, Zach. Zach was really wanting... Literally while we've been recording this email, I've had four more emails about it.

Well, that's because the mailbag went out yesterday. Oh, did it? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, literally while we've been recording this email, I've had four more emails about it. Well, that's because the mailbag went out yesterday. Oh, did it? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, the mailbag. So you're gonna get a lot more pizza hacks. I don't mind.

That's fine. The mailbag went out yesterday. So during mailbag number 40, we talked about peanut butter and cheese sandwiches. Right. You remember that? I remember. I remember. Yeah.

Right. So while that might seem strange, my dad absolutely loves peanut butter and egg sandwiches. Peanut butter and egg. So that's a wild combo as well. These would be made with the whitest of white bread slathered with salted butter, a thick layer of peanut butter and topped with a generous helping of sliced hard boiled eggs. Wow. It must be crunchy peanut butter. The texture is critical. He's eaten these his entire life as if they are the most regular sandwich in Britain, he will enter high street sandwich shops and the staff will look on stunned after he spells out what he wants. He's originally from up north around the Yorkshire area, which may have something to do with it. Being from the

southwest myself, I've never heard anyone else even ask for a peanut butter and egg sandwich. With all that being said, they are actually edible. But you gag when you think about what you're eating. Yeah. The thing is, it's not like, I get if you like that, fine, but you can't realistically expect that people are going to understand what you're saying. It's not a normal sandwich. No. It's not a normal combination for a sandwich. We've got tried, tested and true combinations of sandwiches that people have loved for since the beginning of time or since the beginning of sandwiches.

You know what I mean? And every once in a while, a new one comes along. I can pretty much guarantee that every once in a while, a new one comes along will never be peanut butter and egg sandwiches. I think he's on his own mostly, or maybe that's the internet's great for this kind of stuff. He might find other people out there that like a peanut butter and egg sandwich. I can almost guarantee there won't be many though. No, I mean I've just googled peanut butter and eggs and looking for recipes.

Yeah. Scrambled peanut butter eggs. My husband grew up in West Africa where peanut butter stew was popular. So he started wondering if peanut butter would go with eggs and he puts this in there some sriracha in there some ginger and some garlic, some seasoning sauce and then he just makes the eggs with peanut butter on top. You've got peanut butter scrambled eggs. I think if you're that much off the sandwich grid, you're kind of on your own.

You got to do your own thing. And it's fine. It's fine if that's kind of sandwich that you want to have. But I think to expect the general public to make that or even have it, I don't think he's expecting to go to like, Pret or something and see that. Indeed. But you know, it's an odd one, isn't it? I can't think of anything that I eat that's like, really out there.

Can you imagine him staring into the camera like Marco Pierre White? Just like... The key is crunch, crunchy peanut butter. It must be crunchy. If your peanut butter isn't crunchy, get out of the kitchen. It seems very, like, there's lots of very, very specific elements to the sandwich, which, yeah, it's weird. Okay, let me ask you guys a question.

Salted butter? Yes. Would you ever have unsalted? For baking, but otherwise, why? I mean, if what I was having was incredibly salty, maybe I wouldn't because then it would be too much. But yeah, I always have salted butter. Well, we've always had unsalted butter.

I don't like that. It just tastes like butter, honestly, it's just not salty. Brings out the flavor of the butter. Otherwise it's just, it's just the taste of fat. Yeah. Like the salt makes it better. Yeah. I don't know.

We've just always had it. It's got the mushy taste instead of the salty taste. We've just always had unsalted and nobody's ever really complained about it either. I think everybody's. These are great questions, Sips, that I've not even really considered. No. Due to the fact that I haven't really eaten butter for the last... No. What about you? Do you just get salted butter?

Okay, what about margarine versus butter? I don't have margarine. I don't have a spread. The person who invented margarine, stipulated that he never wanted his children to eat it at one point. Margarine, yeah. Margarine is one of these things that was fake. Margarine? What are you guys saying? Margarine? Margarine? Margarine? Margarine? Margarine? There's a fucking E on the end. Come on. Margarine. Margarine. Margarine. I've never been a big margarine eater either. I've always just been a butter eater. The next thing rhymes with margarine. Clean. This is a question about cleanliness. That's a hell of a segue. Today I had an elderly customer complain that I put their glass through the dishwasher before serving them. She said people are too clean these days and no one has any immune system anymore.

Oh my God. The glass was unused but served to another customer prior for water. And she watched me take it off the table and wash it before complaining. I'm going to say to you, thank you. Thank you for doing that. Thank you for washing my dishes. If nobody else ever thanks you, I am thanking you for putting the glass in the dishwasher so that I have a clean glass that nobody else has put their germs on. Absolute fucking mayhem. You cannot win. And keep up the good work.

You can't win. You can't win. You absolutely cannot. That's what world are we living in? That is the world of people who serve the public. Whether it's retail or whether it's some kind of catering based job where you're serving them. If you're serving them or selling them, you will be astonished daily by what other people

they're out there walking around. Exactly. Like they're normal people! Exactly. That example, that is like a pure, distilled, absolutely isolated example of what it's like, right? But what it's actually like is that, complexified so much that you don't understand that it's completely unreasonable that these people make these completely bipolar requests. Do you know why they do it? Do you know why they do it? Do you know why they do it?

So what was the request? Was the request, please don't put my glass in the dishwasher? I want a dirty glass. It was a complaint. It was a complaint. They were complaining because they wanted a dirty glass. So the setup is this. She served a customer a glass of water.

And then when the customer left, they hadn't drunk the glass. She took it back and washed it for the next customer. Right. Because you don't know if someone's touched it. What if they've sneezed all over their hands, touched a glass, but not taking a drink? Yeah. You don't know. They might have spit in the glass. They might. Who knows? Like, what? She was watching this glass like a hawk and at no point did the guy touch it. Just it's the most decent and basic thing you could do in any cafe, restaurant,

whatever. Yeah. That the stuff is clean. And then when I use it, a previous customer hasn't had their hands all over it. Yeah. That's a very reasonable instead of a question. If I worked at a restaurant, I would never take a dish off of one table and just put it right onto another. No, of course you would. That would be insane.

I never ever would. So this lady's complaining. So Lewis is like, you can't win. They're always going to find something to complain about. Here's the thing. The reason that retail and servers suffer so much is because people know that you are beholden to them, that they are in charge and they finally get to take out some of their fucking frustrations on someone who essentially either has to just fucking suck it up and take it or get fired.

That's all it is, is that you are a big fucking target for people who are awful, awful people in private and now they've finally got someone who they don't know that they can offload this dog shit onto and there's nothing you can fucking do about it. You've got to take it. I agree. That's it. Because she's not going to walk up to someone on the street and say this shit. They'll tell her to fuck off. But you can't do it because you work in a cafe. It's such a boomer fucking idea to be like, oh, we're all too clean these days back in my day i used to roll around in the mud and eat dog shit off the ground and i was perfectly fine people died of

blood poisoning and polio not these days with all this technology and medicine and hygiene washing up you know thing of the past more's the pity i off. Exactly. Get in the fucking ground, you dogshit generation. Fuck. Well, I think the thing is, if they practiced what they preached, they would actually be in the ground. You know, if they actually never washed any fucking glasses and actually rolled around in the dirt, we'd get rid of them pretty quick. Canadian dental student in Philadelphia.

I'm sorry for having to hear about Philadelphia. Long time listener, first time medbagger. I'm the Canadian from Alberta in Philadelphia. I'm sorry for having to hear about Philadelphia. Long time listener, first time medbagger. I'm a Canadian from Alberta. Nice. Saved. Currently studying dentistry in Philadelphia. I'm in my second year and I'm in my research study regarding dental anxiety. Right. I was wondering what your guys opinion is on the dentist. I personally have always grown up with dentists around me, so I never found them as scary as the large majority. Your thoughts?

I don't find dent dentists scary at all so I never found them as scary as the large majority. Your thoughts? I don't find dentists scary at all. I had a man dentist when I was a young... A mentist? A man dentist. He's probably long retired now, but he was really nice. Really nice dentist. Probably dead.

I had a lot of fillings as a kid. I had a bit of a sweet tooth. And I find now as an adult, I don't require so many fillings because I think all my teeth are already filled. So did you have that sweet tooth pulled out? Yeah, no, I didn't actually. Still there. It's still plaguing me to this day.

No, I've never had a fear of dentists and I've had a little bit of dentistry done, not like nothing hardcore. I've never had a root canal or anything like that. But I've had to have a tooth hollowed out with new compound put on and stuff like that. Okay. Okay. Okay. So I don't think I have a phobia of dentists. I am apprehensive about going and nervous about going and probably more nervous about going to the dentist than a doctor or, I don't know, a hairdresser. Right? Like, I think there's a, you know, when you lie down on the dentist's chair and they put their fingers in your mouth and start poking around and

stabbing you and, you know, scratching your plaque off your teeth and saying, oh, you need an x-ray. It's definitely more than, it's definitely a step up. It is the most probably anxiety thing that you can do. Especially if you have to go in for some sort of procedure and God, like, you know, it puts the fear of God into you to actually clean your teeth and floss because having to go back is frightening. I can completely see why dentists would be scary for people to go to. It certainly is a common fear.

It's portrayed in movies and it has been for a long time as a scary thing to do. You always see it, don't you? The amount of movies or horror things I've seen with some horrible dental things gone on and it's gruesome and horrible. I definitely, I had a fear built up in my head because I had four teeth extracted when I was a kid to make room for braces and stuff like that. And the injections into my mouth, I remember that very distinctly. And then I had a couple of fillings over the years and I had a crown, a gold crown fitted to one of my teeth. Um, cause it was cracked

and then- This is exact, me too. I had four teeth extracted for braces. I had a, I had a silver crown for a while. Um, yeah, I didn't take care of my teeth when I was younger for sure. And then earlier this year, um, I had a really, I bit into a tic tac and I got a shooting pain in my mouth. I think I talked about it. I went and had on the, my, my left side, I had, I think three of my teeth were crown went and had, on my left side I had, I think three of my teeth were crowned and I had four fillings as well because I hadn't been in a while. Since before Covid I just fucking got lazy. And then I saw the hygienist and

since then, I basically rarely brushed my teeth in the morning until like after I'd had coffee and maybe mid-morning, maybe I'd remember to brush my teeth. And I never flossed or anything like that because I just thought, it's fine, I don't need to worry about all that. Wrong. My gums were, I thought they were a relatively healthy pink. They were not. They were quite pink and that was like gingivitis and led to a lot of tooth pain and sensitivity. In the last, I'd say what, four or five months or something, I've been brushing twice a day religiously and I used interdental brushes every single night of the right sizes to fit between my teeth. My gums are a

completely different color, really healthy color, no more tooth pain. I'm really looking after them. And it's because I don't want to have to go back to the dentist again. But to me now it's not the pain. It was the fucking expense of having all this done. I was like, shit, I would rather just look after my teeth and save the money. You can't much better. There's dental coverage, some dental coverage under the NHS, right? But aren't the wait times insane? Yeah. I mean, it's not great. Kids can get stuff much easier.

So my kids get reminders and you can come and come to the dentist. But on the NHS as an adult, it's a bit harder. It's the same here. Our health care here. You you can go on the waiting list an adult it's a bit harder. It's the same here, our healthcare here. You can go on the waiting list for dentistry stuff, but it's like years. You gotta wait. Yeah, because there's a lot of people waiting for it. So long.

Yeah. It's a real shame actually. But hey, it's better than nothing in my opinion. It's better than nothing. But yeah, certainly I know many people who haven't been to the dentist in years and could do with it. Yeah, and I think... He's go for a checkup once a year. It'll save you loads of...

I think fear is a big part of it. And I think one of the very common things is you don't go so you feel embarrassed about it and your teeth get worse and then that makes you want to go even less. Right. And it's kind of a vicious circle. But once you've broken that cycle... Oh man. And honestly, here's the thing.

I think it's weird, but as a dentist, if you choose to be a dentist, okay, and this is part, this is another thing I think about, you're gonna, it's a pretty tough job, right? I imagine looking in people's mouths every day. And I imagine that takes a certain kind of person. But once you are a dentist and you're prepared for it, it's like Kim and Aggie, right? Going into someone's horrible shitty house, cleaning the fucking place up and making it lovely. And then taking their... And then looking at them too. Taking their shit right out of them. right? Going into someone's horrible shitty house, cleaning the fucking place up and making it lovely. And then looking at them taking a shit right after that.

Alright, I'm going to knock you out so that I can extract a shit from your ass and put it in a Tupperware container. Oh wait, sorry, these containers are not Tupperware. In a sense, like, what I'm saying is that, you know how, imagine a dentist, if they get someone who's got really terrible teeth, it's almost like, I don't know if this is true dentists, tell me, I'm sure it's frightening, but is it also, it must be also some sort of degree of satisfying to like really help someone out who's got, have had problems with their teeth and like get them looking great. Yeah, I think if they listen to your instructions about doing it properly, it must be very gratifying. I mean, I know when I went back to see my hygienist,

like for the checkup a few months after I'd had the work, then he was like, wow, big improvement. And he offered to do any scraping. If you lost a bunch of teeth though, and you just got used to chewing things with your gums, do you think your gums would harden up a little? I don't know, I've got no idea. These are questions for the mailbag, which period, would not want to have to listen to. No, I don't mind that. I love getting emails from people who have a job that's-

Do you have no teeth? A good trained job where you know shit? Or no, you might just have a couple of teeth. But you know, like, you see older people who are missing quite a few teeth and you just think, how do you eat when you're missing teeth? But your gums must harden up a little bit, right? I'm eating with old Chopper here, see me through some hard times. Alright, that's it.

This is the Triforce underrated jokes quiz. We'll finish with this. This isn't too long. This is the underrated jokes quiz, according to Benjamin. We're going to have no recollection of any of these, by the way. They're mostly going to be Lewis's, I think. Some of these you'll get. He's got a couple of underrated jokes in there for sure.

I think Lewis's best line ever for me, I just want to say in this entire podcast, and I remember it like it was yesterday, was the, don't worry, I have AIDS. I know. I fucking love that. That was perfect. This is short term cast members. All right, who is the roasty toasty old fruity bastard? Oh, that was the muesli man. Who is the roasty toasty old fruity bastard?

That was the muesli man. That was the muesli man. You got it. Oh, my God. What was Lewis's SAS hard man character obsessed with doing? Oh, this I can't remember, actually. Putting putting bottles up people's arses. actually putting putting bottles up people's asses. What does angry northerner john boverill think is the root of the world's problems?

e-sports. All right, of course he does. This is disparaged locales. Match the comments to the place ship-talked. So these are the three locations. Luton, Wisconsin and Australia. Alright? So these are the three statements. You've got to match them to Luton, Wisconsin and Australia. It might as well not be considered the planet Earth, full of snowflakes.

Oh, that's got to be. Well, you think Australia? Number five. Needs to be written off at this point. Maybe if you're into all those kind of things, it's like some sort of mecha. That's gotta be Wisconsin. That's gotta be Australia as well. Number six. You may as well be saying to me that you live on a colony on Mars.

Get out. Get out while you still can. That's looted. That's Australia. That's Australia. The answer was, number four, it might as well not be planet Earth, full of snowflakes, was Wisconsin. Oh, okay. Needs to be written off at this point. That's Luton. Alright. Colony on Mars, that was Australia. That sounds like me in all honesty. You just, you just, I think, I think I always

just assumed you had so many things to say that were bad about Australia. That I just assumed it was all of those things. Can I just say, as an aside, I get so many really genuinely lovely emails from Australians who found that bit very funny and are like, look, you really should come here. It's fantastic. So I really do appreciate them taking it. Okay.

We'll go on a road trip. But I'm never going there. Come on, let's go. No, thank you. Okay, well we at least need to go to France together though. Oh yeah. We keep saying we will. We'll do it next year.

What type of table did the casino owner in Rozvidov want to make? We all know this one. Gaming table. Streaming table. Streaming table. Streaming table. I have Blackjack table, I have poker, I have a streaming table. What colour did the doctors put on Pirian's junk during his heart procedure?

Oh, what colour did they put on your junk? On your junk? Yeah, because that was- During your heart procedure? Oh yeah, because it went up the- Yeah, yeah, up to my side. Inside the vein. It was orange.

It was like disinfectant orange. I don't remember that detail. Pirian was at an interview for which fake publication when the interview was shoplifted. I forgot I told this story. What the fuck? I don't remember this at all. Say this again. I went for an interview to write for a magazine and the guy did a competition where you had to write reviews of a bunch of bars.

And I did that. And then he was like, I thought your interviews were the best. Come on in and we'll do an interview. So I went to his office and he said, let's pop out to Oxford Street and we'll get something to eat. I was like, cool. So we went out and we popped into Selfridges and while we're in there, we'll walk around. He looked me square in the eye, took a coat off the rack, put it on, and we just walked out. That was the job interview. Fucking hell.

You obviously don't remember the story. I don't remember the reaction of that story. It's for a magazine called the London Review, because that way he thought people would confuse it for the London Review of books and think this was related to it somehow, but it was just going to be reviews of bars and things, and he was going to give 50 quid to the concierges or various hotels to get them to hand it to people when they were asking for recommendations of a stay in London. That was his whole plan. That is crazy. I can't remember the guy's name unfortunately.

He short-lifted a jacket just right in front of you. Yeah. That's absolute mayhem. Yeah, I know. It was bizarre. It was ab- and I thought, God, this guy's never going to pay me even if I do get the job. But I was unemployed. So I was like, what else am I going to do with my afternoon? This is at least an interesting story. Sips's lifestyle. Three questions on Sips's lifestyle. Okay. What broke in Sips's bathroom, prompting him to tell the same story two separate times?

The bath plug. Yeah, correct. We remember this. What is one of Sips's superpowers which came up when talking about Taylor Swift? Oh, he could tune it out. No, no, I can- You can visualize having sex with anyone. What does the aura frame in Sips's bathroom show?

You got an aura frame in your bathroom? Oh, not that I know of. Well, apparently it displays a picture of the bathroom before it was renovated. That's such a good joke. Memories. This is so good. This is Lewis' quote. So you have to determine if this quote was said by Lewis Bradley of the Oxcast or King

Charles the third. Oh fuck. This is, this is much harder than you think it's going to be. When I was 20, well, this is obviously Lewis. When I was 20, all I knew about 20 year old women was that they were not fucking me. That's true. That's Lulu. Talk to your vegetables. Oh my God. Talk to your vegetables. Yeah. That could be me now, but it's not me from earlier. Oh my god. Talk to your vegetables. Yeah. Hmm. That could be me now, but it's not me from earlier.

I think that's a Lewis thing. It's gotta be King Charles. It's a King Charles. There's nothing like a good disaster to get people doing something. That's me, probably. That is King Charles. Whoa! I got off the rails a bit.

I look forward to getting back on. That sounds like a King Charles. That's a Lulu. That is a Lulu right there. For sure. Oh, they're great. We had a big laugh at our own fucking podcast. Man, it is occasionally funny though.

Those are quite some funny jacks, too. I tell you what though, the other day, Perian's been perfecting his Trump accent, and we were doing this thing in Minecraft, and Perian turned up up as Trump in like a Minecraft chump skin with the chump voice, like fully chomping it up. And we were all just like, I think this is, it's actually fucking hilarious. But it's just way too much. And it was, it was, it was really uncanny. And I think, I think the thing is like, it was just, I was just like, you don't need

to do this. But thank you for so much. People were horrified. I asked in the discord, I've got a Donald Trump skin for this Minecraft. Is that okay? And people were like, what? They thought that I was a fan or something. We should hang Ben.

I've been saying it for years. Hang Ben. Kill Ben. Ben's he's no good. He Hang Ben. Kill Ben. Ben's no good. He's coming over the border. He's bringing his demons and his minions. He's taking over the clock. We gotta get rid of it. It's the worst Ben we've ever had. I was going to do that for like three hours and then I'm glad I didn't. You gave us a little taste of it and I was like, this is so good. But how could you, I just didn't think you could like, these when I'm doing like a impression on, about something, I kind

of can't focus on the rest of the game. And it was your first game. Yeah. Right, the clock tower. And I felt like it was just, there's no way you're going to be able to play the game competently and do a brilliant Donald Trump impression. It's not, it's not good, but it's getting there. I did it, I did it the other weekend for my mates and they did think it was good, then I kept doing it and they're like, all right, you can stop now and I kept doing it to be more annoying Yeah, I know they hate it. I love you. Yeah, I love your Joe Biden Impersonation is so good

Finish the podcast. It's been 17 17 flat flowers hours hours been 17 hours. Hey, no, wait a minute That's what I was talking about. I don't believe this. You know, we can look at this guy's a damn man. It's just he just whispers, but do an old man whisper and say, wait a minute. And Ali can't even sound like it. It's just funny. You just imagine his eyes really wide.

Wait a minute. What are you guys saying Wait a minute. Caribbean. a coffee's impression always ends with that. I can't believe it's not butter. Alright, that's the mailbag. Hey, some good emails. Thank you. Yeah, thanks so much. Keep them coming. glorious. Enjoyed it. Thank you guys Yeah, thanks so much. Keep them coming. It was glorious. Enjoyed it. Thank you guys. See you next time.

Goodbye.